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[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part XIX: Always on My Mind

Characters: Balthazar, Pedro, Ursula

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/John

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

Sorry for another short one. I just wanted to get back on the horse since I haven’t posted for a long time.

________________________________________

The drive home from the hospital was filled noise from the radio. The DJ and his guest laughed and joked, and Balthazar wanted nothing more than to reach through the car’s console and throttle them till they shut up.

Ursula seemed to sense his anger and turned off the radio. She made no attempt at conversation.

They drove in silence until Balthazar couldn’t handle it anymore. “She’s terrible, Ursula. When you said she wasn’t doing well, I thought - I don’t know what I thought - but it sure as hell wasn’t that. The tubes and the beeping and the fake smiles. How did this happen?” He stopped for breath. That was a stupid question. It happened the way stage four breast cancer always happens. Without thought, feeling, or humanity.

“I’m sorry.” Why was she apologizing? She didn’t do this to Bea and Ben. “I should have prepared you better. I’ve gotten so used to it.” The heaviness in her voice didn’t make Balth feel any better.

When they had walked into the hospital, Ursula had gone up to the nurse on duty at the desk, said something with a small smile, and led Balthazar down hallways she seemed far too familiar with. With the same familiarity, she walked into Bea’s room and took a seat by her bed.

She had held Bea’s hand and made small talk, like her friend wasn’t lying in a bed with wires and tubes stretching from her body. She had shared glances with Ben and known exactly when to go and get water for Bea.

When Ursula had said she visited Bea everyday, she really meant she had been her nurse. It made Balthazar wonder who was taking care of her.

Before he could contemplate the matter, Ursula pulled up to the curb in front of his house.

“Looks like you have a visitor.” A nod of her head had Balthazar looking toward his house. The familiar figure on his porch wiped thoughts of the hospital from his head. Pedro.

______________________

“So, how’re you settling in. I mean, all two seconds you’ve been back…” Pedro scratched the back of his head, the familiar action pulling on Balth’s heart. This was clearly the same Pedro he left years before, but - was he?

“Ursula took me to see Bea. She was doing well.” Lies. “Well, not really, but you know.”

Pedro looked up at the mention of Beatrice; Balthazar could see pain in his eyes. Everyone here had been carrying that pain while he lived it up at uni. The weight of his selfishness hit him again. Damn.

“Yeah, she’s holding it together pretty well considering.” Pedro didn’t seem too convinced by his own words. At some point, they would both have to stop lying.

Silence fell - this time it was worse than in the truck. Pedro wasn’t mad, but now they were both thinking about their sick friend.

“Ursula gave me your song a few months ago when I asked her about your music.” Oh. Well that was one question answered. “It’s really good. I mean, not that I’m surprised. Your stuff is always good. But, I mean, the lyrics were great. I’ll never understand where you get your inspiration from.” Seriously, Pedro? Where could Balth possibly get his inspiration for a song about unrequited love? Obviously not from his ex-best friend. Nope. Not at all.

“Ah, it just comes to me sometimes. No big deal.” Cool, yeah, play it cool. “You asked about my music?” Okay, there goes the cool.

Pedro paused to kick at a rock. “Yeah, I ask about it all the time. I ask about you all the time.” He looked at Balth and tilted his head. “Do you ever ask Urs about me?”

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part XVIII: Kiss With a Fist

Characters: Ben, Beatrice

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/John

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

I know this is super short, but I had no idea what I wanted to write for Ben. To keep the order of the story, I just drew some inspiration from the newest VOX POPS 2 video.

________________________________________

“Claudio, she’s hitting me!” My plaintive cry falls on deaf ears. Ursula and Hero are filming and pointedly not looking at me and Beatrice. Claudio is busy staring at the two girls. They’ll all be sorry for ignoring me when I’m lying on the ground in a bloody pulp. Damn Beatrice and her surprisingly strong arms.

I turn my thoughts back to the fight, and I start slapping until I gain the upperhand. Haha! I victoriously drive the beast back with my Herculean strength and the ferocity of a warrior. That’ll show her.

She stops fighting to catch her breath. Guess we know who the victor is then. Me! This guy! I turn to Claudio, expecting a thumbs up or congratulatory hug for my success. He’s still staring at Hero and Ursula. What’s so interesting about them? I just vanquished a blight on the face of humanity.

“Gah!”

Beatrice hits me while my back is turned. Typical, Just so typical. She strikes again. Alright, time to end this.

I shove her once. Twice. Right in the boobs…

Today is the day I might die. Right here, right now. I doubt all these witnesses will stop Beatrice from lobbing my head off with a karate chop.

Instead, she just laughs and runs farther away. She’s laughing. Why? I just touched (shoved) her boobs. Where’s the righteous anger?

But god, she’s beautiful when she laughs.

I follow her. Can’t let the enemy get away.

_____________________________

Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please comment or like or favorite or whatever it is you do on tumblr!

[writingwithoute-blog]

Just in case anyone was getting as confused as I was - I actually took the time to make a timeline of events so far (definitely not to scale).

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part XVII: Having My Baby (Part II)

Title: Having My Baby (Part 2)

Characters: Hero, John

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/John

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

Sorry it’s been so long since I last updated. With school, work, applying to teach in Korea, and a million and one other things to do, this kinda took the invisible, nonexistent, farthest to the back-burner. Hopefully now I’ll have some time to work on the story!

_____________________

Hero was woken up by movement on the bed next to her. “John?” His familiar hand came to rest on her hip and pulled her closer to him.

Neither of them said anything more for a few minutes, but Hero could feel John trying to control his breathing. It was something he did whenever he was stressed - four seconds in, four seconds hold, four seconds out. She could feel every four seconds out on the back of her neck, reminding her that John was still there.

“I - I’m sorry I left like that. I know it was literally the last thing you needed. I just couldn’t… I mean -” Hero grabbed John’s hand, effectively stopping his broken apology. Turning toward her boyfriend (a bit awkwardly because their bed was so tiny), Hero tried to think what she should say. She could yell at him, but she knew that it wouldn’t help anything. And it probably wouldn’t be too awesome for the baby. The baby that was inside her. The baby that John probably didn’t want. Damn it.

Lifting a hand to John’s face, Hero smoothed the crease between his eyes with her thumb. He was always so worried, so stressed. “John, I get it. It was too sudden. I get that it wasn’t a good time. You’re going through all this stuff at work and -” This time, it was John’s turn to interrupt her. He kissed her and then kissed her again. A third time for good measure.

“What I’m going through at work is nothing compared to finding out you’re carrying a baby inside you.” True. He paused. “You know my relationship with my dad has never been great. Hell, I didn’t even really get to know him growing up. I don’t exactly know what a dad does. And,” here, his voice broke, and he looked into the darkness over Hero’s shoulder. “And, you know about my issues. All my many, many issues. I mean, how am I supposed to raise a kid when I can barely get out of bed sometimes. I know it’s been better lately with the new meds, but what if they stop working and…” Hero could feel wetness on John’s face and pulled him close so their foreheads were touching. There would be time for more words later.

The sobs came then. She held him as he fell apart, both of them knowing she would be there in the morning to put him back together.

____________________________

Hero greets John at the door when he walks in. He looks tired, but he smiles at her. It’s the relieved smile he reserves for her when he sees her after a long day. She probably has a similar smile just for him.

“Hey Wonder Woman, how’s it going?” Somewhere over the years he’s taken to calling her different superhero names. He’s not much for typical cutesy pet names, but he insists that superheroes are too badass for it be cute. Hero’s personal favorite is Batgirl, since it’s usually reserved for special occasions.

She takes John’s bag as he slips out of his shoes. “Not bad, just did some painting. The usual.” Went to the doctor. Found out I’m having a baby. Made friends with a sarcastic pregnant lady while watching her kid phaser other unfortunate kids in a park. The usual. “What about you? How was Fred’s acting today?”

“Less drunk than yesterday, but still pretty horrible. When is it acceptable to tell a friend that he’s fired?” John’s voice holds a bit of humor, but mostly frustration. “He really needs to get his shit together.” They both know he won’t fire Fred. After the whole thing with Pedro, John isn’t very judgmental. Fred was also one of the only people to believe in John’s dream of directing a movie two years ago when he started working on the project. “Other than that, everything went surprisingly well. We were actually able to get that shot through the trees on Kirk Hill.”

“That’s great! I know you’ve been wanting that one for a while.” Getting lighting just right is always difficult. “Are you hungry? Dinner should be done soon.”

“Wait, like an actual dinner? That you cooked?” Hero punches John’s shoulder, but he just grins back.

Hero rolls her eyes as she guides him to the kitchen. “Yeah, yeah, keep going and you might just have to get takeout.” The timer goes off on her phone, and she tosses John a couple of oven mitts. “Go ahead and take it out for me, yeah? I’ll get our drinks.” A beer for him, water for her.

He pulls open the oven door and inhales. “Lasagna! It’s been forever.” He freezes then for a moment, and Hero can tell he’s thinking about that time five years ago. They both think about it every time she makes lasagna. Shaking his head minutely, John retrieves the pan at sets it out to cool. “So, what’s the occasion?”

“Nothing. Just wanted to make something nice. I finished my project and had some time.” Lies, so many lies. But he didn’t need to know that right now.

With a calculating look, John concedes, “Alright, well thank you. It looks beyond nice. Hand me some plates?”

The two settle down at the dining table with dishes piled high lasagna and salad. John closes his eyes as he chews his first bite, and Hero can’t help but smile. It can’t be that good, but her husband never holds back the compliment on her cooking. His mom never cooked for him, so he doesn’t take it for granted when Hero does.

They talk about different things: John’s movie, Hero’s garden, their niece’s school recital that Pedro is beyond excited for them all to go to (“How many times will everyone get to see my little girl play the Dr. Who theme on the recorder?”).

“Shit, ow! What the hell was that?” John holds a hand to the side of his mouth and winces. He spits out something and watches as it lands on the table with a tiny thunk. Hero watches, too, breath held in fear and excitement. Her husband pokes at it - flesh-colored, hard, baby-shaped. “Is this - did you - baby?” He looks at her for some sort of explanation.

Hero shrugs and says as nonchalantly as possible, “I might have been lying when I said I cooked for no reason. Do you know how hard it is to sneak a tiny plastic baby into takeout?” She looks down at her plate, finding it hard to pretend she isn’t shaking.

Her husband’s familiar, comforting hand lands on her own. Hero glances up to find John staring at her. Smiling. He’s smiling!

“So, either it’s Mardi Gras a few months late, or you’re trying to tell me something. I’m guessing it’s the latter.” A small nod from Hero. “Batgirl, are we having a baby?” The hope in his voice, in his eyes, is too much for Hero.

“I found out today. I went to the doctor and everything. I even met a pregnant lady and a kid with a phaser-thing.” By now, Hero is crying, and John is walking to her side of the table. He kneels in front of her.

Chuckling, he mutters, “I don’t know anything about phaser-things, but I do know this is the best news I’ve heard in my entire life.”

The sincerity with which John says it makes Hero cry more. She’s pulled into a warm, strong hug, and she knows they’re going to be ok.

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part XVI: Having My Baby (Part I)

Title: Having My Baby (Part 1)

Characters: Hero, John, Janice (OFC), Jon (OMC)

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/John

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

_________________

It’s official. She’s pregnant. Walking out of the doctor’s office, people smile at her, and she can’t help but think they all know, that the smiles are all congratulatory. Hero knew she was pregnant before coming here, but she wanted the affirmation of a trained professional. And now she has it. After all, seven different at-home pregnancy tests spread out over a few days can still return a false positive. But now it’s a very real, very official positive.

John won’t be home for a few more hours, so Hero takes her time driving. She’s been avoiding telling him about her seven-test hunch, but now she can’t wait to let him know. She can’t really imagine his reaction, but hopefully it’ll be good.

Hero turns off the radio after a few minutes of channels surfing - no one’s playing anything that fits her mood. Are there even any songs that say, “I’m having a baby, and I’m so excited I could burst, and I’m so terrified I could burst? Probably not. People don’t seem to write about stuff like that.

Hero finds herself watching children run around from a hard, uncomfortable park bench. She can’t help but think that someday soon, she’ll be watching her own kid run around, and the benches will probably be just as hard and uncomfortable.

“Which one is yours? Mine’s the one in the green shirt trying to topple the dinosaur statue.” A woman sits next to Hero, sighing as she takes the weight off her feet. Her hands are resting on a sizable baby bump, and she looks at Hero expectantly.

“Oh, I don’t have one. Yet.” Is it weird to be here without a kid? Yeah, definitely. She clarifies, “I just found out I’m pregnant. Well, I took an at-home test a few days ago, but now I know for sure.”

“And by 'an at-home test’ you mean a million. I was the same way. My name’s Janice, by the way.” Janice holds out her hand, and Hero shakes it with a smile. Her first mom friend!

“Hero. What’s your son’s name?” She looks over to where the boy is playing with a couple of other kids.

Janice smiles at her son for a moment before responding. “Jonathan. His father named him. He just turned five, and his first birthday declaration was that everyone call him by his full name, not Jon, under threat of merciless tickling. I’d like to say I don’t know where he gets his attitude from, but I’d be lying.” Her smirk makes it clear she’s not sorry. The honesty makes Hero like her even more… a lot like Bea.

The two women watch the children run around for a while. Hero can faintly make out what they're saying to each other. At one point, Jonathan pulls out his fingers in a gun shape and makes loud ‘pew pew’ noises. “I got you with my phaser, Sam! You're incapacitated.” Sam, a girl in a red checkered shirt, puts up a fuss - why does she have to be the first one out. “Sam, the red shirt always get killed or stunned first. It’s the rules.” Jon’s logic is sound, so the game continues.

An hour passes like that, with Hero and Janice talking over the yelling and laughter of the kids. When she checks her phone and sees how much time has gone, Hero trades contact info with her new friend and heads home.

The drive to her house gives Hero time to think of how to tell John about the baby. Perhaps a banner? No, John isn’t the banner type. Maybe she could just tell he outright, no frills. She wants it to be special, though.

___________________

Hero waited by the door, expecting John to come home any minute. She wasn’t sure how she would tell him she was pregnant. They had only been dating a year, and while that year brought them closer than they thought possible, it was still pretty early on to be having a baby together.

The turning of the doorknob brought Hero back to attention. John was home!

He came through the door, the look on his face alerting Hero to his mood. “Bad day?”

She just got a grunt in reply.

“I’m sorry to hear that. What happened?”

John walked to the couch and threw himself down in a rare dramatic fit. “David screwed me over. Turns out the investor he was talking to about funding our film is now funding his film. Apparently David’s been working on a secret project behind my back, and he’s been getting all our potential investors in on his film. I basically have no funding, no partner, and everything’s fucked.”

“Oh.” Here didn’t know what else to say. She sat next to her boyfriend and put a hand on his shoulder. There wasn’t much else she could do. This was obviously not a good time to tell him about the baby. “Well, I made dinner if you want some. It’s actually you’re favorite - lasagna.”

With a semi-interested grunt, John stood up and made his way to the dining room. It was actually more of an extension of their tiny kitchen, but Hero tried to make it as dining room-esque as possible. The table was set with their best dishes, and the lasagna was sitting in the middle, probably lukewarm by then.

“It looks good, Hero. Thanks. After everything today, this is really nice.” John and Hero sat, serving each other portions of lasagna and salad. They ate in relative silence, John occasionally making noises to let Hero know he appreciated the food. After they had finished, he took the plates to the sink to wash them. “So, any particular reason for the dinner, or just wanted to cook something nice?”

“Um, I actually have something to tell you.” Hero watched her boyfriend pick up one of the knives and run it under the water. “Maybe you should come sit down.” No point in him accidentally cutting himself.

John put the knife down carefully and said, “Alright. Anything I should be worried about?”

Now that she had his full attention, Hero wasn’t exactly sure how she should break the news. All her perfectly planned words flew out the window, leaving her to grasp at straws. “I, well, you know that you mean a lot to me, and this relationship means a lot to me. And, I guess what I’m trying to say is-“ Hero searched for words that actually fit the gravity of the situation. “Well, I’m pregnant.” So much for saying it nicely.

The silence that hung between the two seemed to last for ages before John walked quickly past her and out the front door.

__________________________

Sorry to leave off there. I just wanted to post something - I had to rewrite the beginning not once, but twice, because my computer is a piece of crap, so I didn’t get to update as soon as I’d like.

Let me know if you have anything you want me to work into the story. I love challenges!

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part XV: Your Song (Part II)

Title: Your Song (Part 2)

Characters: Balthazar, Ursula

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/John

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

“What did you say to him, Balth? He seemed really upset.” Balthazar had to lean away from the phone a bit. Ursula actually sounded a bit mad – it was her tone more than her volume that made him wince.

“Nothing, we didn’t talk, like, at all, the entire ride home. I tried, but he turned up the music really loud. Kinda a nonverbal ‘fuck off.’”

Ursula sighed. “Well, then what did you do? He was really excited when he left to get you. I mean, hell, he volunteered to go before I could finish telling him I couldn’t.” Interesting, Pedro had made it seem like Ursula strong-armed him into it. Why would he lie about that? “Tell me exactly what happened from the beginning.”

“Um, well, I got to the baggage claim with Tony, and-”

“Wait,” Ursula cut him off, “Why was Tony there?” She didn’t let Balthazar answer. “No wonder Pedro was upset. He hates Tony. Were you being friendly with Tony or just walking with him?”

Finally, a pause for him to answer. “Tony and I actually sat next to each other on the plane – unplanned, of course. And, yes, I was being friendly with him. I mean, we are friends. Also, why would Pedro hate Tony? I thought they got along.”

“Pedro’s hated Tony since our senior dance, remember? You know, when he basically jilted you for Cleo? Anyway, now I definitely get why Pedro seemed pissed off. His first time seeing you in five years, and you’re chatting it up with some guy he hates.”

Balthazar had never heard Ursula sound so judgmental. “Hey, last time I checked, I’m allowed to be friendly to whoever I want. And whose side are you on anyway? Since when were you all ‘Team Pedro’?” It really bothered him that his best friend was already laying into him before they even saw each other.

“Ok, you’re right. This isn’t fair to you. You don’t really know the circumstances. Look, there’s some stuff I need to tell you in person. Can you meet for coffee in about an hour?”

_____________________

The first thing Ursula did when she saw him was pull him into a huge hug. “I’m sorry I got upset earlier. You’re back for the first time in years, and I yell at you. I’m really glad you’re here, you know. I’ve missed you.” Balthazar hugged back. Skype calls and texting were definitely not the same as seeing Ursula in person. How had he survived so long without seeing her?

After getting their coffee and claiming a table, the two friends jumped right into the ‘Pedro issue’ as Balthazar dubbed it. “So, what do you need to tell me about him? It seemed kinda serious on the phone.”

“Well, you’ve had your ban on all things Pedro, so I wanted to respect that and not say anything, but it’s been really hard. He hasn’t been doing too well since you left. Actually, he’s been a complete disaster.”

“But it’s been five years. And it’s not like he was the one who was madly in love.”

“Yeah, it’s been five years, but are you over him?” Ursula raised her eyebrows when Balth refused to answer. “He might not be in love with you, but you were his best friend. Sure, he has Ben and Bea and the others, but you were his best friend. And you just up and left. Disappeared.” Balthazar tried to interject with some sort of defense, but Ursula held up a hand. “I get why you did it. You needed a break so you wouldn’t, well, break, but Pedro didn’t know that. He went from seeing you and hearing from you everyday to being completely cut off.”

Balthazar sat and thought it over while Ursula sipped on her coffee. He had known from the start that it wasn’t fair to Pedro, but no one else had said it to him. “You said he hasn’t been doing well. What did you mean by that?”

After a pause, “You know Pedro was always a bit of a drinker. Life of the party, all that. Well, the drinking part got a bit worse, and the life of the party part became pretty nonexistent.” Another pause. “Balth, he’s an alcoholic. It wasn’t just you leaving. This isn’t on you. It was all the change – his scholarship falling through, friends leaving, basically having no direction in life – it just kind of pushed him over the edge a bit. I mean, he’s been getting better. His parents got him to see someone about it, and he isn’t drinking anymore, but it’s still there. He says it always will be.”

Balth felt sick. Pedro, his best friend, the love of his life, had been dealing with this shit for five years, and he, being ridiculously selfish, had blocked him out completely. Ursula had been quick to keep him from blaming himself, but how was he supposed to believe he wasn’t a big factor in this? “Why didn’t you tell me? I mean… I’m sorry, that isn’t fair to you. I said ‘no Pedro news’, and you were just respecting that. But, why didn’t anyone tell me?”

Ursula swirled her coffee around in its cup for a moment before answering. It was obvious she was trying to figure out how to phrase something. “I think everyone understood why you left like that. No one wanted… everyone knew you loved him.”

“Everyone?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh.” He let that sink in. “Did Pedro know?” Please, no. Please.

“You know Pedro. He’s oblivious to basically everything. He’s gotten better about it, but no, he had no clue.” Thank the gods.

The two sat in silence for a while, drinking their luke-warm coffee.

Then it hit Balthazar. “What the hell am I doing, thinking about this right now? I should be with Bea. I let her know I’d be coming in today.” That seemed to wake Ursula from her reverie.

“Of course, I’ll take you to see her now if you want. She’s pretty lively most of the time.”

“So, basically normal Bea?”

“Yup. She’s still in fighting form. Yesterday, she and Ben argued for half an hour about flamingoes.” Balth’s face must have shown his disbelief. “Yeah, that flamingo thing is still going. And Ben is just trying to keep things normal. You know how they’ve always loved their little fights. I think it’s actually encouraging to Ben; like, if she can hold her own in an argument, she’s still ok.”

Balth asked after a beat, “But how is she really doing, Urs? I need you to be honest with me.”

She shook her head. “Not good, Balth. She and Ben are holding it together, but it’s really not good. I probably wouldn’t have called you home if it wasn’t so bad.”

Ursula could always be trusted to be honest, even when it was hard. Balthazar’s heart sank.

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part XIV: Your Song (Part I)

Title: Your Song (Part 1)

Characters: Balthazar, Pedro, Tony

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/John

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

Balthazar gripped his armrests as the plane’s wheels touched the tarmac. The flight home from Brighton had been, well, eventful. After finding out he had window seat, Balth had worried he wouldn’t be able to switch with whoever he sat next to. He was a nervous flyer, and he always tried to get an aisle seat. No one had said no to switching with him yet, but what if he was with an equally nervous flyer?

His worries had been unfounded – when he had gotten to his seat, a familiar face had beaten him there. Tony.

“Oh, hey, let me get out of your – oh, Balthazar! My god, it’s been forever. How are you mate?” After a bit of explaining, Balth found himself in the aisle seat, catching up with an old prom date.

Tony had been really talkative (and maybe a bit overzealous with the arm touches and knee pats). University had been too boring for him and so had Cleo. So much for soul mates. They had broken up three months after moving in together at university, and Tony had packed up his stuff, leaving his ex to find a new roommate to take on the rent. From there, he had started giving private surf lessons. His business was good, and he got to have sex with plenty of blonde, tan people. Of course, that was the condensed version Balth had taken away from the saga Tony had told him.

Now, many long hours later, Tony was still going strong, oblivious to Balthazar’s terrified expression and shallow breathing. “Ya know, I saw your friend, what’s his name- whatever, doesn’t matter- anyway, used to see your friend at the bar all the time. You remember that bar a couple blocks from the movie theater? Haven’t seen him in forever though…” As Tony mused over which friend it was, Balth continued to grip his armrests as tightly as possible. The plane was still rolling down the runway. It would stop soon. Of course it would stop. What if it didn’t? What if it crashed? No, pilots are professionals. Everything would be ok.

“You ok, Balthazar? You don’t look so great.” Tony finally noticed his discomfort and touched his knee again, probably in comfort. Possibly to feel him up. But Balth had no energy to think of that.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just-” The plane jolted to a stop, and the pilot’s voice sounded through the cabin, apologizing for the less-than-smooth landing.

Tony helped Balth get his carry-on out of the overhead compartment when they got the go-ahead to leave the plane. The walk to the baggage claim was filled with more talk from the surfer about his business and how Balthazar would probably be good at surfing. When they reached their destination, Balthazar looked around for Ursula. She said she would pick him up at Claim D, but before he could look too much, Tony touched his shoulder and said, “It was pretty cool running into you, Balth. Maybe we can catch up again over coffee or dinner or something.”

“Sure, that would be fun.” The two were about to exchange numbers when Tony pointed behind Balth.

“Hey, it’s your friend I said I always saw at the bar. What’s his name?” Balthazar turned quickly at “his.” Ursula wasn’t a guy. But Pedro was.

He was standing, holding a sign reading, “BALTH,” and staring right at them.

Balthazar’s heart dropped.

___________________________________

Balthazar watched quietly as Pedro heaved his luggage into the bed of his truck. Silence seemed to be the name of the game.

Not much had been said when he and Pedro were reunited in the airport. His friend (ex-friend?) had said the proper hellos and nodded to Tony, but he didn’t seem too keen on conversation. “Ursula said something came up last minute and asked me to pick you up instead. Since I have a truck that’ll fit all your shit, you know?” Pedro had then grabbed “all Balth’s shit” from the carousel while Balthazar traded numbers with Tony. The two had parted with a hug, promising to stay in touch. Maybe a bit too much touch on Tony’s part, since his hand kept finding excuses to rest on Balth’s arm or shoulder or lower back.

Pedro had then herded him out the door, luggage in tow.

They were now climbing into the truck, and Balthazar had no idea where to start. “So, you still have the truck.” No duh. Two seconds around the other guy had him saying the stupidest things.

“Yeah.” Pedro started the truck and plugged in his phone. Music filled the cabin, and when Balth opened his mouth to say something, the music was turned up.

The rest of the trip to his house was spent in silence. Balth wanted to take in the sights of his old home – the old shops, the new shops, the school, the park – but couldn’t because Pedro felt like a dark, heavy cloud beside him, and he couldn’t think of anything else. Just as he was about to try starting another conversation, the music playing switched to a quiet song. A familiar song. Really familiar, in fact.

“Is this my song?” Balth knew it was but asked anyway. Pedro hit the “off” button on his stereo, and the truck was worse than silent.

The song was one that Balthazar and his band had recorded a few months before they broke up. It was about getting over unrequited love. Surprise. What did surprise him, though, was that Pedro had the song on his phone. Ursula was the only one he had given a copy to, which meant… damn it, Ursula.

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part XIII: Tell You

Title: Tell You

Characters: Ben, Ursula, Balthazar

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/John

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

Everyone is here. I wish they weren't - I mean, I love them all, and of course they're all here to support me. I just really don't want support right now. I want to sink as low as I possibly can and just stay there. Why does everyone want to lift me, lighten my load, buoy me up with memories of happier times?

I think Ursula's the only one who really understands. She woke me up from my spot on the couch this morning and guided me to the bathroom. No words. Just a small touch here - eat you breakfast, Ben - or a gentle shove there - get in the car, Ben. She's not obsessed with getting me to talk about my feelings, but, then again, she never has.

Today, I'm putting my wife in the ground. Maybe I should be crying, but if I let go here, I'll probably end up throwing myself in the ground with her.

Instead, I stand and listen to the minister say words that Bea wrote out herself. She insisted that nothing cheesy would happen at her funeral; no mentions of heaven needing one more angel or of her being in a better place. "Ben, I want it to be the most kick-ass farewell ever."

Ursula touches my arm. It's time for me to say something. I step forward, all eyes turning toward me, the poor, miserable husband who lost his wife. The young widower who's burying his soulmate.

"I met Bea one summer and fell for her immediately. I remember thinking she was like a warrior queen: strong as hell. And boy was she a fighter…" I have a whole speech written out, but I can’t get anymore words to come, no matter how hard I try.

There’s silence, broken only by my choked-back sobs.  

Balthazar, the mighty, wonderful friend who up and left everything to be with me and Beatrice, stands up and moves to the front of the gathering, ukulele in tow. I’m not sure what’s going on, but it’s taking attention away from me, so I’m grateful.

“Um, I’m Balthazar, one of Bea and Ben’s friends from high school. Bea loved Ben more than anyone in the world. Even when she was sick, she only cared about making sure he was ok. She asked me to do something special for him, and you all knew Bea - you couldn’t say no to her. So, back when they first got together, they made me help them write love songs for each other, and, um, Bea asked me to perform hers one last time here for everyone. Um, yeah, so here goes.”

Balth pulls out his phone and fiddles with it for a moment, while I consider making a run for it. Leave it to Bea.

Before I can get away, Balth starts strumming, the familiar chords gluing me to my chair. He keeps going for a couple of measures, and then I hear it.

Her voice floats from his phone - There’s no way to tell you, how much I like you…

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part XII: Little Talks

Title: Little Talks

Characters: Hero, John (no more ‘?’!)

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/John

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

He’s looking at her through the window he’s cleaning, and she half expects him to press his face against the glass at some weird angle. But he just keeps looking, a small smile on his lips. 

Today is cleaning day at the Donaldson/Duke residence, which means Hero is trying to reorganize the kitchen and finding, once again, that there are either too few cabinets or too much stuff. Or a combination of the two. Either way, the Tupperware lids are not appreciating their new home, if their frantic escapes from the drawer are anything to go by.

Hero looks up from her task of stuffing the lids back in and catches the eye of her husband through the glass of the kitchen window. 

___________________

There he was, sitting outside on the big wrap-around porch. The cup in his hand was tipping dangerously, but he rescued it at the last minute. Hero had been dragged to this party by a friend from her lithography class who claimed she “needed to find a hot piece of man candy.” So Hero found herself in a huge press of sweaty, dancing bodies, looking for the nearest exit. She had yet to find a “hot piece,” but she had spotted her acquaintance/tentative friend outside.

Pushing through the people around her, Hero fought her way through the back door to the safety of the cold night air. She breathed in. And immediately started coughing. A guy holding a cigarette sheepishly smiled and moved a bit farther from her. 

Hero looked around and saw her friend (was he a friend?), his drink tipping again. 

“Hey, mind if I sit with you?” Her question startled him, and his beer sloshed over the side of the cup. 

“Oh, yeah, sorry, didn’t know you were there.” He looked at Hero through alcohol-hazed eyes and smiled. She couldn’t remember seeing him smile since the picnic in high school. “So, who dragged you to this party?”

Hero chuckled. “I love how you assume someone had to force me to go to a social gathering.” He gave her a ‘I’m calling bullshit’ look. “Ok, ok, my friend Gerald from litho wanted me to find a guy here. He says art can’t be my significant other, but I wholeheartedly disagree. Now that I’ve shared, who dragged you here?”

He took a gulp of beer and winced at the taste. “This is actually my house. I’m renting it with Trent, the guy who’s throwing this thing. He’s an ok guy; we just have very different ideas of fun.” He gestured at the people dancing inside. “I’m more of a ‘stay at home and watch a movie on the couch’ kinda guy. I don’t do well with – well - people.” He shrugged and chugged the rest of his beer. Hero felt a connection with him. She, too, did not do well with too many people. 

“Same, I’m just really good at faking it. Secretly, I can only handle being around a few people at a time.” She felt funny telling him this about herself; she had never really told anyone – some friends picked up on it, others didn’t. Either way, she had been able to keep her bubbly, friendly persona safe. Not that she wasn’t actually friendly or bubbly, but she definitely didn’t feel that way nearly as often as she pretended to. 

He looked at her for a moment, recognizing that what she had told him was important to her. “You know, you could get away with being sad or upset, or even angry, without losing friends. You’re genuinely nice, and it doesn’t hurt that you’re really pretty.” The last part was mumbled, but Hero caught it. She definitely wasn’t expecting that. 

“You think I’m pretty?”

“Yeah.”

“Ok.”

Silence fell as Hero stared at the fireflies that had come out and her friend stared at his empty cup. 

“Thanks for helping me with my art project the other night. I got an A on it, so, thanks.” She had been surprised when he showed up the evening after he walked her home in the rain. In keeping with his personality, which had not changed much from high school, he had said very little, but his presence had made the whole project a bit less terrible. 

He shrugged again and ducked his head. “I’m still a bit surprised you’re talking to me. I know, I know, you’ve forgiven and forgotten, or whatever, but how are you even sitting here with me?”

“I haven’t forgotten.” The words slipped out of Hero’s mouth without her thinking. But she meant it. Yes, she had forgiven him, but the forgetting part would never happen. “I mean, forgetting isn’t important. I just want to move forward, no matter what’s in our past. I know you never meant to hurt me.” 

He said nothing. 

“Do you want to go to the zoo with me tomorrow? A mother red panda just had babies, and I really want to see them! I could always use some company.”

This time, he turned to look at her instead of his cup. “Red pandas are my favorite animal,” he said quietly, as though he didn’t want anyone else to know he liked such cute animals. “I suppose I’d be up to it. What time?”

___________________

Hero finishes cramming the Tupperware lids in the drawer next to the stove just as her husband comes back inside the house. He takes off his cleaning gloves and throws them and the Windex on the table.

“The window look so clean, babe. Thanks for doing that – you know I’m too short to reach the top.” Hero smiles up at him.

He leans down to kiss her forehead and mumbles against her hair, “If a bird flies into it and dies, so help me…”

“Don’t worry, it’s not like you’re Ben.”

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part XI: Come Back Home

Title: Come Back Home

Characters: Balthazar, Ursula

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/?

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

________________________

“Don’t forget your uke!” Samantha waved goodbye to Balthazar as he hopped out of her car, instrument in tow. Like he would ever let his uke out of his sight.

His friend had driven him to and from his usual Saturday gig, and she always reminded him to grab whatever instrument he had with him because she knew Balth would never dream of forgetting one of his precious babies. Apparently, she thought it was really funny and always laughed to herself when she said it. Sam actually laughed at a lot of her own jokes.

Balth had met Sam at university when he quite literally ran into her on move-in day. Her blonde hair was pulled back in braids around her head, and she immediately made him think of Hero. He quickly learned, however, that her personality was a lot more Ben-ish. Sam talked a lot, and he was happy to let her.

Now, five years later, they were still friends, best friends in fact. Balth knew everything about her, and she knew everything about him, including his preference for boys. She did not know about Pedro, though. Nothing. He had been careful to never mention his old best friend - hard as it was, it helped him push away the past.

Ursula still called and skyped frequently, but conversations with her were limited to the here and now. What did she do last weekend? How did his band practice go? Every once in a while, she would include some news on their high school friends. She stayed in touch with everyone, like a spider keeping her web of friends together, even if by dangerously thin thread. Hero opened an art studio and moved in with John. Ben and Bea got married while vacationing in Paris and didn’t tell anyone till they got back. Meg started and quit tap dance lessons. Balth often wondered what she told the others about him. “Balthazar’s still living by himself in that dinky studio apartment. His band’s falling apart at the seams, but he’s too afraid to go solo. He’s still desperately in love with Pedro. Basically Balth’s life is simultaneously boring as hell and a complete mess. But, yeah, he’s doing ok. Thanks for asking.”

It was true: Balthazar was alone when he wasn’t hanging out with the few friends who had stuck around after graduation. Everything in his apartment was broken, and the landlord kept hinting that a dinner date might speed up the maintenance process. No one else wanted to date him, though, so he spent his evenings writing music and listening to music.

His band was a complete mess. During his second year at uni, Balth had met three other guys who fit his musical vibe, and the four of them had started playing at local bars and coffee shops. They had all meshed pretty well at first, but soon they were arguing over whose song lyrics to use or who was accidentally speeding up the tempo. Balthazar was basically done with them, but the idea of performing alone scared the hell out him.

Sam and Ursula were the only people in whom he confided his fears and regrets. His parents and sister were sweet, but they also kept trying to bring up Pedro - they still didn’t get the hint after five years. Instead, his two best friends would just sit and listen when he really needed to vent. Balth usually talked about the band and his general lack of direction in life, but sometimes he wanted to pour his heart out about his continuing feelings for Pedro. He never did, but Ursula could always tell when his mind strayed to their mutual friend.

Balthazar wanted to call Ursula after Sam dropped him off, but then remembered that she was having coffee with a new guy who had “potential”. Instead, he turned on Sheep, Dog, and Wolf’s newest album and lounged on his couch.

________________________

Ursula’s call came as a surprise, breaking through the haze of a mid-afternoon nap. “Beatrice is in the hospital. You need to come home. Now.”

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part X: Warrior Queen

Title: Warrior Queen

Characters: Ben

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/?

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

I met arguably the coolest girl ever today. Her name is Beatrice, and she could kick anyone’s ass. If we were in another universe, she would be a warrior queen who rips out the hearts of her foes and eats them. She would also probably be topless. What? I’m a teenage guy. I get to say stuff like that.

Beatrice is actually the cousin of this girl Hero who goes to Messina. She’s friends with Pedro, and Pedro and I are sworn brothers. Even though that blood pact didn’t quite go as planned… John is such a party pooper.

Anyway, Beatrice, or Bea, as her friends call her (I think I can consider myself a friend), is super awesome. She likes nerdy stuff like Harry Potter - we spent like two hours “arguing” over who was better: Fred or George. We actually did a lot of that “arguing.” She seems to like banter as much as I do, so that’s cool. Everyone else seemed to get sick of it pretty quick, but whatever. They’re just jealous of our combined wit. Together we, much like Galadriel, are frightening to behold. And the coolest thing is that she actually probably knows who Galadriel is. Nerd power!

Hero also seems pretty cool. I’ve met her a couple times through Pedro, but this was the first time I spent more than a few minutes with her. She’s really sweet. I honestly don’t know how she does it. But more power to her, right?

Now I’m trying to figure out what to do with Bea tomorrow. She’s the first person I’ve met who shares my level of sarcasm, so I feel like I should take advantage of that. Maybe we can go to that weird poetry slam place and laugh at people who can’t snap. How sad would that be to love poetry but not be able to snap. Ugh, almost as bad as never seeing a majestic flamingo in person. The horror!

I wonder if Bea like flamingos… maybe we can go to the zoo. I bet she’d like that.

There’s nothing much to do around Messina, but I bet I can come up with some fun stuff for us to do.

Pedro’s supposed to be working on a history project with this guy he met in class - Bart, Bill, Ba-something. Whatever. He won’t be hanging out with us is the point, and I bet Hero will be baking cupcakes for orphaned hamsters or something. So that just leaves me and Bea. Bea and me. Bea and I? I and Bea? Ugh. Grammar, am I right?

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part IX: I Don’t Mind

Title: I Don’t Mind

Characters: Hero, ?? (but seriously, this should be pretty obvious by now)

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/?

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

The light pattering of rain can be heard on the window as Hero lies on the couch, staring at the ceiling. She’s tired. Really tired. For the life of her, though, she can’t seem to fall asleep. It’s four in the afternoon, and she’s trying to take her usual nap. Luckily, as a freelance graphic designer, Hero has the slight luxury of napping.

With a sigh, Hero turns to her side. It doesn’t help. Neither does the other side. There’s just too much to think about for her brain to shut down.

‘Just close your eyes and listen to the rain, Hero,’ she tells herself. ‘Relax and listen to the rain.’

_______________________

Hero stepped out of the art building into the torrential downpour. She had been working late without realizing that the clear, warm weather from the earlier part of the day had been replaced by bucketloads of rain.

‘Well, I guess I’ll be leaving my bike here.’ Hero didn’t trust herself to ride through the huge puddles in the street without falling off and hurting herself. With no umbrella to protect her head or her bag, she ventured out from under the building’s overhang. She was immediately soaked but had no option of turning back - she couldn’t very well sleep in the art building in her sopping clothes.

“Need an umbrella?” The question startled her, and she spun, hands up in some semblance of self-defense. Her ninja pose was met with his concerned face. Hero laughed in relief and put her hands down.

“Don’t you know you’re not supposed to sneak up on people at night?” He shrugged and held his large black umbrella over her head so it covered both of them. “What are you doing here this late anyway?”

“Which way do you live?”

Hero tried to not feel exasperated at the lack of answer. “Over on Oak by that gross, little pizza place.”

He turned and started walking in the direction of her apartment, leaving Hero to jog to catch up with him. “I was doing some research for a film project in the fine arts library. You?” Hero knew he was a film major from the few time she had talked to Ben about him. Out of everyone who had made YouTube videos in high school, he was surprisingly the only one to continue. He was such a private person, but apparently airing his feelings and frustrations to a captive online audience actually helped him work through everything. That had led him to becoming a film major. Him being at her university just happened to be chance.

He was still looking at her, waiting for an answer. “Oh, yeah, I was finishing up this 3D project. I’m doing an installation piece made from wire coat hangers, and they’re a lot harder to work with than I thought.” She showed him the scratches on her hand. “I’m done with it. Not actually done, but, you know, checked out. Maybe I’ll just do something with paper.”

“But then you’ll get paper cuts, which are arguably worse. Maybe you should just quit art and go into politics. After all, no one gets hurt there.” Hero laughed. When did he get this sense of humor?

“Yeah, but then I’d have to get used to backstabbing and rumors, and you know how I am with those.” She chuckled. He didn’t. Damn, why did she say that? “I’m sorry, that was really out of line. The first time I’ve seen you in three years, and I go say something -”

He stopped walking and grabbed her shoulder. Hero looked at him and saw pain in his eyes. “Hero Duke, don’t you ever apologize to me. Just don’t. It’s going to take me a lifetime to apologize, so I sure as hell don’t deserve hearing a sorry from you.” He let her shoulder go and kept walking.

When they got to her apartment, they said goodbye, and he made sure she got through her door safely.

The next evening, he showed up in the art building with wire cutters and dinner.

_______________________

Hero wakes to her husband gently shaking her awake.

“Hey, babe, what were you dreaming? You were making your weird happy face.” He looks amused, like he knows exactly what she was dreaming about.

She just smiles when she notices his large black umbrella leaning against the wall.

[writingwithoute-blog]

Without You Part VIII: Beep.

Title: Beep.

Characters: Balthazar

Pairings: Beatrice/Benedick, Balthazar/Pedro (eventually), Hero/?

Rating: T (for language)

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Nothing Much to Do/Much Ado About Nothing.

A/N: This story is set in a universe where everything happens except Balthazar and Pedro getting together. The chapters will not take place in chronological order, so don’t think you’ve missed anything if chapters don’t match up with the ones before. Also, there’ll be mention of a major character death, so yeah, there’s that warning. Hope everyone enjoys this - I’ll try to update as often as possible!

Balthazar threw himself on his new bed. He had yet to put sheets and blankets on it, so he could feel the plush mattress material on his arms. Looking around at his dorm room, he felt a wave of nausea in the pit of his stomach. The walls were blank, absolutely nothing like his walls at home. There were no band posters or pictures of his friends. He had no friends here… No, he needed to stop thinking like that.

His parents had dropped him off a few hours ago; after carrying his stuff up to his room and going out to lunch, they had driven off with waves and a teary “Promise me you’ll call every day!” from his mom.

Now, lying on his bed, Balth knew this chapter of his life would take more effort than the last. He would have to make new friends, explain to them that he was gay, cross his fingers they wouldn’t desert him.

A beep came from his phone. Message from Pedro. Ignore.

He didn’t have any cute nickname for his best friend – that would make his fantasies seem real. And they weren’t.

Balthazar had decided when he left for college that he also needed to leave the past. He needed to leave his love for Pedro, or at least leave Pedro, even if the love was permanent. He hadn’t said anything to Pedro about his decision, just hung out with him one last time at his house. They had played video games and eaten a lot of pizza and fallen asleep on the couch at 2 a.m. The usual. Pedro had seen him out the next morning with a pat on the shoulder and a sad smile. Not a “I’m never going to see or hear from you again” sad, though. If only he knew.

Beep. Another message from Pedro. Ignore.

He was planning on falling out of touch with everyone. It would make moving on easier. Of course, he would still talk to Ursula, but that’s because he knew she wouldn’t bring up Pedro, or how happy Bea and Ben were. She would know the boundaries of conversation.

The only way Balth could move on in life and potentially fall in love with someone else was if he didn’t have access to Pedro – his face, his voice, news about him. Nothing.

Staring around his empty room, Balthazar tried to convince himself it would work.

[writingwithoute-blog]

Have I Met You?

Balthazar gets up the courage to talk to Pedro while buying guitar strings. (AU)

There he is - the hottest guy I've ever seen. Even in his orange uniform polo and khaki pants, he looks incredible. Today’s the day I’m going to talk to him. Not tomorrow. Today. Maybe. No maybes. Now go.

The small music store is pretty empty for a Saturday afternoon, but I guess that mean I’ll have more of his attention. I need new guitar strings; I’ll probably end up buying whatever else he tells me to. Money doesn't really matter if I get to talk to him longer. We’re just going to ignore how sad that is.

Damn, he just saw me. And he’s smiling. I was hoping for a few more seconds to prepare myself. Well, here goes nothing.

“Hi. Could you help me find guitar strings?” I know where the strings are; after all, I come in here every week. I usually do a good job of hanging around where he won’t see me, though.

“Yeah, sure, they’re right over here.” I follow him to the back of the store. “Have I seen you in here before?”

He remembers me! He’s noticed me! “Yeah, I've been in here a couple times.” A hundred million times, just to see you.

“Here they are. Take your pick.” He looks at me expectantly. “You know, like a pick. A guitar pick.” Silence. “You know, take your pick.”

Holy crap, he’s a dork. A huge dork. An amazingly hot dork with amazing hair and terrible jokes. Be still my beating heart. “Ha, yeah, that’s, that’s really good.” I’m still trying to get past the part where he’s a real person with bad puns. “Picks. Cause guitars. Yeah…” Brain is out of commission. Where’s my back-up brain when I need it?

“So, um, that was a bit of a miss, huh? I’ll have to remember that.” He runs his hand through his hair, the perfect, perfect hair. “I’m Pedro, by the way.” Pedro. Pedro. PEDRO. His name echoes in my head.

I take his hand, which feels pretty damn perfect. “Balthazar. Nice to meet you. And the joke wasn't bad, I just…” I trail off, cause how do I explain, I was too busy realizing how dorky you are and how much more perfect that makes you?

“I’m gonna let you get your strings. Just let me know if you need anything else.” Pedro (still can’t get over knowing his name) smiles again, and I realize we haven’t stopped shaking hands. Well, we've stopped shaking, so we’re just holding. Holding hands. Is this day even happening??

I decide to test the waters - he knows I know we’re still holding hands, so if I don’t let go, what will he think? I keep my hand in his and look at him. I’m feeling oddly brave. Pedro looks at our hands, then up at me.

“Why don’t I ring up those strings for you? I get off in five, so why don’t I take you to get some coffee?” He squeezes my hand, and I forget to breathe for a second (or five). He’s awfully forward - I like it.

______________________________________________________________

I’ll never get over Balthazar’s shy smile. When he came in today, he was carrying himself with a bit more height. He was confident - always a good sign. But his smile was shy. It’s always shy.

Balthy’s been coming to the music store I work at for three years. He only remembers two of them. The first time he talked to me, he asked to see the guitar strings. I had seen him in the store before (okay, maybe I thought he was really cute and watched him shop), but he had never talked to me. I showed him to the guitar section. When I turned to leave him to peruse, he reached out and grabbed my arm. So unlike Balth. He needed my help picking strings out. Three hours later, we were still talking in the guitar section.

I didn't see Balth for a few weeks, which was odd. When he came in again, he had some bruises and cuts on his arms and face, but he looked happy. I smiled and waved, but he just smiled shyly back, a touch of confusion in his eyes. After a few seconds of standing in the doorway, he asked me to show him the guitar strings. I thought he was messing with me.

Ursula, Balthy’s best friend, came in with him one day (he had taken to coming in every day and asking about guitar strings). While he was in the guitar section, Ursula took me aside and explained everything - Balth had been in an accident on his bike right after we had met. While he was physically healed, he had lost his memory of that day. He apparently thought every day was Saturday and that his guitar still needed new strings. I was vaguely reminded of that American movie “50 First Dates”. I guess that makes me Adam Sandler.

I also learned that Balth thought I was “super hot,” so that explained why he kept flirting with me when we talked. Ursula thought I might be able to help her friend - she gave me her blessing to take Balthazar out on a date. “Just don’t hurt him, or I’ll hang you with your damn guitar strings.”

Now, almost a year later, I've taken Balthy out every day. I got my boss to agree to giving me shifts every day (she’s a total sucker for romance), and I know his coffee order by heart. We usually go to a movie after, then dinner. For the first couple of months, my friends were worried I was investing too much time in a guy who never remembers me, but they eventually got that he’s the love of my life. We connect on a level I've never had with anyone. I honestly don’t mind if I have to rebuild our relationship everyday. At least we have a relationship.

Also, note to self, the new pick joke works surprisingly well.

[writingwithoute-blog]

Thanks for writing even though you're sick!

Title: I promise this is building up to something Characters: Pedro Donaldson, Balthazar Jones, Ursula Prompt: Dancing Word Count: also not enough Rating: G (because nothing keeps happening) Notes: Not today. Sorry this is short. I feel like crap :P no I mean I’m actually sick. I’m not sure...

[writingwithoute-blog]

It's a weakness of all real humans. How else do you think I weed out the robot imposters?

writingwithoute reblogged your post and added:

Ugh… You’re killing me. Couldn’t you just upload a million chapters at once? Just for me?

SURE! <3

[writingwithoute-blog]

Please stop it. Just stop. 

THE ROADIE: Day 17 - Song

Title: Facts Characters: Pedro Donaldson, Balthazar Jones, Ursula Prompt: Song Word Count: 865 Rating: T (language possibly I can’t remember) Notes: So for this one… Nah. I’ll just let you read it :D Just make sure you’ve read Fanmail first. 

—

“So, what am I doing here again?” asked Pedro.

Balthazar and Ursula were setting up to film a video of him playing to put on YouTube. They used to do that all the time but since the band had been touring all the time over the past two years the last video they’d posted was over a year back. One camera was on a tripod by the piano and Ursula was freehanding the other one.