writtenx

[writtenx]

Finding You - azngami (part 4)

Look awaaaaay I know I said part 4 would come by the end of the week. Yeah, this has been a whole new week but hehehehe here it is!

If you haven't read the last recent part (part 3), I'll put the link right here:

And if this is the first part you've stumbled on, please read part 1 first! It will help with context and everything :)) here's the link!

Thank y'all so much, happy reading! <3

Your number sat in Ryan's phone as he saved it immediately. It was just more of a struggle to now start the conversation. It was weird, it was fine to start the conversation with Diana, your younger sister, but right now he would be the one to initiate the conversation with you. It's been so long.

Ryan went back to Diana's story, with careful fingers, trying not to click heart or react or anything. You looked so different, but so beautiful. You were always beautiful in his eyes, but to see you again after so long of wondering...it made a lasting effect on him.

"Good morning," Justin's voice brought him out of his thinking. Ryan looked up and then closed his phone. He didn't want anyone catching him become the biggest simp.

"What's up?"

"Yo, are you tryna go to the breakfast cafe?"

Ryan blinked. "Pre workout?"

Usually what Ryan and Justin would do was to get a good workout in, and then grab breakfast when they all showered and were too exhausted to move.

Justin let out a yawn as he stood by the mirror of his room, running fingers through his hair.

"Yeah, I don't know. I'm feeling lazy today."

Ryan let out a small chuckle. "C'mon dude, we're just hitting back today."

"We can do it after, I promise. I just need like, a muffin or something, and then I'll be good to go. We don't even need to stay, just grab and go type sh't."

Ryan paused, letting out a sigh. Then he shot a look. "You paying?"

"Would that make you come with me?"

Ryan smiled. "Yeah!"

Justin rolled his eyes. "Okay, let's go."

...

"So, what's the latest updates on your mysterious whole foods girl? Darren told me that you slid into her sister's Dms?" Justin asked as they walked down the sidewalk.

He said it in a certain tone, and when Ryan looked at him, he was smiling. Ryan stared at him for a second before he gave him a hard push down the pavement.

"Yo! Chill! I could've broke something!" Justin yelled, causing a couple of people to stare at them.

"Why'd you say it like that?" Ryan interrogated.

"Say it like what?"

"Like I hit her sister's DMs in a weird way." Ryan argued.

Justin rolled his eyes as they reached his car. "Bro, you're so stupid. I didn't imply anything! That's on you for thinking something sus."

Ryan sighed as Justin started his car, and then opened the door to the passenger's seat. When they both got in the car and settled, Ryan's grabbed Justin's aux cord.

"Watch my aux boy you almost broke it!" Justin snapped.

"Shut up, I'm playing music!"

This bickering continued until Justin started driving. After a minute of silently listening to Keshi's latest album, Justin looked over at Ryan.

"So you're not gonna tell me the latest deets with that girl." He said.

Ryan froze. He thought Justin would have dropped the subject or forgot about it then. Ryan looked out his window, studying the clouds in the sky.

"What did Darren tell you?"

"All he said was that you texted her sister asking about her. Which, I'm mad at you actually cuz out of all the boys you would let Darren write your text?" Justin said, turning to look at Ryan.

Ryan shook his head. "It wasn't like that. Darren was in the room with me as I wrote it, but he didn't tell me what to say." He said.

"Oh really? That's not what Darren said."

"What, what did he say?" Ryan asked, now looking over at Justin.

Justin just shook his head as he watched the road, chuckling to himself.

"Nah, like...Darren gave me the idea to text her sister, but that was it. If he told you he wrote the text, he's a liar." Ryan said.

"Sure sure."

"On my mama I wrote the text!" Ryan defended, his voice starting to raise.

"Okay, fine, chill. What'd you say anyways?"

"Uh..." Ryan had his phone in his hands, but for some strange reason he didn't know if he wanted to share with Justin. It was kind of embarrassing for Ryan to show Justin this side of him. The soft boy simp side. Even though Justin wouldn't really do anything bad, and Ryan didn't write anything out of pocket, he didn't know how to bring it out without being embarrassed. He hated showing the guys this side when he was crushing on someone. He was all giddy and stuff. He hated it. It wasn't him.

Justin's eyes widened as he looked at Ryan when they came to a red light. "What did you write?!" He asked excitedly.

"I didn't write anything that you're thinking about, relax."

"Then why aren't you showing me?" Justin asked.

"Because it's my Dms, hello? I don't have to show you sh't. Relax." Ryan said.

"You definitely asked for nudes." Justin said with a smile.

"What the f'ck?!" Ryan yelled.

"Well if you're not showing me, then that means you have something to hide, it's nudes. What else would it be?" Justin said with a laid back smile. "Didn't know little bro had it in him."

"Oh my gosh." Ryan closed his eyes and groaned. He knew what Justin was doing. Justin wanted to aggravate Ryan so bad and push him to the point where he would reveal the texts. But he didn't want to do that.

"You're delusional." Ryan muttered as he turned and faced the window. "I'm not showing you sh't."

There was a silence for the rest of the song before Justin turned to Ryan.

"I have a question,"

Ryan clicked his teeth. "What?"

"Why are you texting her sister and not her?" He asked. When Justin asked, there was no certain smiles on his face, he genuinely wanted to know.

"She doesn't have social media."

"Ohhh, that's pretty valid. So, what you're just gonna text her sister and make her messenger or what?" Justin asked.

"Justin. I'm not dumb. I have her number." Ryan said, the sentence alone making his heart skip a beat for a second.

"Oh word?" Justin flashed a smile. "That's what's up!"

"Yeah it is. Her sister gave it to me, so..." Ryan said with a little smile himself.

"Are you guys talking a lot?"

Ryan took a deep breath. "Um...I actually didn't text her yet."

"What?!?!?"

"I will, I just-"

"Ryan, come on! Text your girl! What are you waiting for, her to make the first move? Even though she can't?" Justin laughed. "You're bad."

Ryan rolled his eyes. "I will text her, I just-"

"How long have you had her number saved in your phone?"

"This morning."

"Oh." Justin relaxed. "Well that's not bad."

"Yeah, see? She might be sleeping or something."

"We'll send her a good morning text, the f'ck? Girls like that sh't." Justin said, turning a corner. When they reached another red light, he looked at Ryan. "We are not going to step into the cafe, until you text her."

Ryan shook his head. "No."

"I will give you 100 dollars and a free breakfast, whatever you want on the menu, if you send her a good morning text." Justin said.

When they got to the parking lot, Justin locked the doors to the car right before Ryan got out. Ryan turned and looked at Justin who just looked at him.

"I'm so serious, Ry. If you want 100 dollars and free breakfast, text her right now." Justin said.

"Why the f'ck are you doing this to me, yo? You act nervous and dumb all the time you like a girl and I don't give you sh't." Ryan said.

"So do you want the deal or not?" Justin said. "I'm out here giving you a free breakfast, you never even think of doing sh't like this for me when I like someone. I'm being such a good friend right now. She might like you and fall in love, this could be your future wife right now and if it wasn't me pushing you to text her a good f'cking morning text, nothing would even happen." Justin said (or more like gaslit).

Ryan groaned out loud as he reached for his phone. Technically, this deal wasn't the worst thing in the world. Ryan could walk away from this deal with 100 dollars, a free breakfast, and a text back from you. But that made him nervous. If he was to set the bar, it would need to perfect. But what was the perfect start text? Sure, Justin said to text you good morning, but was that enough? Would it be too much? Too little?

Dang. Ryan was overthinking again.

He pulled open the recent saved contact under your name and went to type. He then stared at his phone for a few seconds, while Justin just waited in silence with the door still locked. He wasn't playing apparently. He was serious.

Ryan breathed out a sigh and ran fingers through his hair. It shouldn't be that difficult. He felt cowardly.

"Just text good morning, and say that you're Ryan, you got her number from her sister-" Justin started to say.

"Don't f'cking rush me. We're staying in the damn car for an hour if you rush me." Ryan scowled.

"Okay, chill."

Ryan knew that he was going to text something along those lines. He just didn't want to copy and paste from Justin. He could do it.

Ryan started typing.

good morning! it's ryan from high school...and whole foods lol

i hope you don't mind that diana gave me your number, thought it'd be easier to just text you!

hope you have a good day today :)

"Sent." Ryan said. He quickly turned his phone to Justin in a millisecond just for him to see that something was sent, but he quickly turned the phone away so Justin couldn't see what exactly Ryan said.

"Okayyyy, that's my boy, I knew you had it in you! Let's go." Justin said, unlocking the door.

"Are you not gonna send one hundred? Do that right now, and then we'll go." Ryan said.

Justin blinked and then took his phone. "Damn." He muttered. Ryan laughed.

As Ryan looked out the window, he smiled to himself. He felt kind of confident and grateful that he did that when he did. He was curious to what you'd say and when. He didn't want to be the guy that constantly checked his phone, and luckily he was busy enough to not be that guy usually, but you were dangerously on his mind. He could admit to himself that there were butterflies.

As he looked down the parking lot and the cafe, he thought of what he was trying to have. Should he order a big breakfast just to get on Justin's nerves? Nah, he'd probably settle for an açaí bowl or fruit bowl if they didn't have. He was going to have a good time enjoy something for free. The day was already starting to look good.

That was, until, he saw someone open the exit door from the cafe, going through her tote bag. Ryan recognized you immediately. Like Whole Foods, you were here. You were right here at the breakfast cafe.

"Oh sh't." Ryan said, suddenly feeling nervous. He hoped you didn't look this way, the car wasn't far from the entrance.

Was he dreaming right now? No, you did just appear the moment that he texted you. Right in front of him.

"Oh sh't!" Ryan repeated, this time his voice was rising.

"What?" Justin asked, as he tried to load cashapp.

"Justin, we gotta go."

That caused Justin to look up from his phone. "What do you mean we got to go? What're you talking about?"

Ryan looked down, hiding his face. "She's right there, coming out of the cafe."

"Who?" Justin asked, gullibly.

"Dude, who did I just text?" Ryan asked, giving him a side-eye.

"Are you serious?" Justin asked. Ryan didn't reply, he rested his head on his lap and covered it with his hands. He didn't want to be seen. Not right now.

"Yo, she's checking her phone, I think she's looking at what you texted her. She's smiling. I told you girls love when guys text them good morning! They love that sh't!" Justin shook Ryan excitedly.

Ryan wanted to see your reaction in real time, but he remained where he was. What if you saw him?

"Ryan! Get out of the car! Go talk to her!" Justin told him.

"Nah, bro, I can't!" Ryan said.

"Why the f'ck not?"

"Look at me! I'm wearing sweats and a t-shirt!"

"Oh my gosh." Justin started driving to the back of the parking lot where they wouldn't be seen. When the coast was clear, Ryan looked up. You were on the other side of the parking lot getting your stuff.

"You are so lucky I'm doing this. Can't believe you're backing down." Justin said in disbelief.

"Don't even talk, remember last week when I was trying to get you on facetime with that girl and you were like "no I look like a homeless person" and you refused? Yeah, that's what I thought. Dipsh't." Ryan said.

"Oh, I'm the dipsh't? Last I checked-"

"Wait, shut up, she texted."

Ryan glanced at his phone where he saw that there was a new text notification. When he looked ahead, you stopped right beside your car, having your phone in your hand. It was kind of cute, Ryan thought, that you had no idea that the guy you were texting back was just a few feet away. Even though, he wasn't trying to stalk you, he genuinely had no idea you were awake and at the breakfast cafe at this time.

Ryan looked down at his phone, seeing the new text. He hovered over so he could see the whole message, without having to open it so he left you on read.

Good morning Ryan! No that is totally okay I don't mind :) I was going to ask Diana for yours she just beat me to it lol

I hope you have a good day too! It's so cool talking to you again after all these years! :)

Ryan smiled.

"What did she say?" Justin leaned close to Ryan's seat. Ryan immediately backed away.

"Chill, yo!"

"I don't get why you're texting her when you could be talking to her face to face right now." Justin said.

"Yeah, how's the facetiming going?" Ryan snapped back.

When Justin didn't say anything, Ryan nodded. "What I thought."

Ryan looked down on his phone and gave it a few minutes. Just as he about to think of texting you back, he looked ahead and saw that you started going to your car. He didn't want to text you while you were driving, so he put his phone in his pocket, turning to Justin.

"Okay, we can go." He said, putting his hand on the door handle.

Justin shook his head, but didn't say anything.

"Did you send it?" Ryan asked.

"Send what?"

"The money!" Ryan said.

Justin snorted. "Why? You hid in the parking lot while your girl was right there! Nah, I'll send you 50 now, and then the next 50 when you can plan a meet up with her, so you guys can actually talk face-to-face."

Ryan gave Justin an aggressive slap. "That wasn't part of the deal, dummy!"

"Okay fine, fine!" Justin said as he got out his phone. "You didn't even talk to her."

"You told me you would give me 100 dollars and a free breakfast, that's on you if I didn't talk to her, that's your bet, that's not on me!" Ryan clarified.

About a minute later Than got the notification that Justin sent him 100. He smiled when realizing that a free breakfast was on the way.

~~~

Thank you loves for readingg, I don't know how long part 5 will come, but I'll start working on it tonight! It'll be out soon <3

[writtenx]

Finding You - azngami (part 3)

Hey my loves!! It's been a min, and I'd have to apologize for that! I think the main reason I haven't updated in a while is because I've been TEXTING THIS MAN ON STARYO???? if y'all haven't checked staryo out yet, please do, it's a messaging app where you can literally talk to any member of nsb or all the boys, whatever you want! And it's actually them, it's not like AI generated or whatever! So I feel like because I've been texting him on there, it's been a little weird to write a fanfic because he like...actually knows who I am now?? Does that make sense?? Idk, I'd consider him a friend at this point, and so to write fanfics about someone you're literally talking to, idk if that's just a me thing, but I feel pretty awkward.

At the same time tho, I do think this fic is cute and pretty harmless. I would never write anything uncomfortable and that's not where this is going. I don't imagine this to be a long fanfic and I don't know, the whole idea has been cute so I'll update here and there

Thank y'all so much for reading, part 4 will come by the end of this week, bc this one was kind of a short one!!

Be sure to read part 2 before this one, or even start over since it's been long, imma put the links up!

Happy reading :))

You woke up extra early the next morning from the warmth of the sun and the sound of birds chirping. You groaned, sat up for two seconds, staring at nothing as your consciousness was starting to rise. For some reason, although the day had passed and you and Diana went through shopping, eating, and then coming back home to raid all the snacks that there was for movie night, you still couldn't help but think of yesterday.

It was during the movie that Diana gasped loudly, causing you to shoot her a weird look as you noticed she was on her phone.

"What?"

Diana didn't reply, but immediately shoved her phone in your face. You quickly moved her hand away in reflex because you were convinced that girl was trying to blind you.

"Diana! Turn your brightness down!"

"Sorrrrryyy!" She said, quickly changing her settings. "Looked who replied to my storyyy!!" Her voice was chirpy.

You were curious as you leaned your head against your sister's looking at her screen. "Who?"

And then you saw the username which made you stop in your tracks.

You took Diana's phone and she laughed as you looked. You didn't know why but your heart skipped a beat.

hi diana this is random but did you and your sister go to (high school name)?

You hand the phone back, not being able to hide your smile.

"He texted 41 minutes ago." Diana pointed to the time that the message sent. "Oh my gosh, let me text back, hold on!"

You kept your eyes glued on Diana's phone, being presently there just to make sure she wouldn't do anything you wouldn't approve of.

"Okay...." Diana's voice trailed off and you layed your head on her shoulder, peering.

yes we did! you were in my sister's class right?? did you two see each other at whole foods yesterday?? i think she said she saw you but didn't know if it was you :)

You felt kind of nervous considering the fact that your sister was texting your crush about you, right next to you. You were curious to see what he would say, but you weren't even sure he was online.

And he wasn't. The waiting was the hard part. Because now the thoughts of him went through your mind as you tried to watch the rest of your favorite movie. But how could you? For the rest of the night there was nothing and you finally went to sleep.

It was this morning that you kept wondering if he did text back. But you probably wouldn't find out until after, as you were an earlier bird that Diana. The suspense was killing you, but you knew that sitting in the middle of your bed just thinking about a response wouldn't do anything. You had to get started with your day.

You had two cheat days this last week when it came to your workouts so you knew that you would need to start the routine back again. It was tiring at the start, but you crawled out of your bed, and washed your face and brushed your teeth. When you grabbed your workout mat in the corner of your room, you walked down the stairs and then went to the living room. Moving all space necessarily, you played a home workout video and followed the excersises. You knew lowkey why you were doing this. You wanted to be productive enough to give your mind something else to think about aside from Ryan.

What would he say? You questioned as you went down for pushups. But you shook your head and stretched your body fully on the mat and went into the pushups required for this circuit. Maybe he didn't even say anything yet; it wasn't even a full 24 hours.

You did your workout, showered, and then changed into your clothes for the day. There was a small breakfast cafe you lived across the street from and some days (like today) you would just get breakfast from there. You gave it a solid minute before you shook your head. You wanted to check up in Diana, but then that would be showing signs of obsession.

But you were always obsessed, why stop now?

You went straight to Diana's room. She was sleeping peacefully even thought it was 10am. You had two choices: either wake her up and interrogate, or let her sleep and hijack her phone.

You glanced at her phone beside her and then back to her. Finally, you decided to wake your sister up. She could always go back to sleep.

"Diana..." Your voice trailed off as you gently shook her.

You were grateful Diana was a light sleeper. She slowly opened her eyes and just stared at you.

"Hey, I'm gonna grab a breakfast sandwich at the cafe, do you want anything?" You asked, building it up. You didn't want to just wake her to ask if there were any new DMs or anything.

Diana stretched, rubbing her eyes as she made an inhumane sound. She had the covers over her face so you could just see her eyes.

"Um...can I have the fudge chocolate pancakes?" Her voice was hazy and her eyes were puffy. You kind of felt bad, but you knew that as soon as you left, Diana would go back to sleep.

"For sure. Anything else?" You asked.

Diana let her eyes close as she turned to the side. "No. Thank you." Then she slowly looked over at you.

"Did Ryan say anything?" She asked, half asleep.

You smiled for half a second before keeping a straight face, trying to pretend like the plan was never to find out about Ryan.

"Uhhh...I don't know, I wouldn't know, he texted you." You said.

Diana pointed to her phone as she groaned. You could see that sleep was about to take her in a few seconds. "You can check. You know my phone password, right?"

You shook your head. "Nah, I don't think so."

Diana said the numbers groggily and you thanked her before she went back to sleep. Now that her phone (and potentially Ryan's text) was in your hands, you didn't know what to do. You were nervous for some strange reason. All you had to do was just open instagram and look at the recent DMs. But you were scared.

What if he just left Diana on read? What if this, what if that, there were so many what ifs trailing your mind. But you did remember yesterday. Technically, he reached out first, and he asked if you both went to that high school you guys all went to. It was him, no doubt.

All you had to do was check Diana's dms. That's all. Nothing big. No huge ribbon cutting ceremony. Besides, maybe he knocked out early the night before and was still sleeping. Not everyone was an early riser like you.

No matter what, you had to check.

You took a few steps away from Diana's bed, awkwardly standing in the corner of the room with her phone in your hands. You have it 10 seconds, then 30, then a minute, and then finally you took a deep breath and went to instagram.

You went to her DMs and then saw Ryan Nguyen's name on top, in bold, as there were 3 new unread messages from last night at 2am.

yes she did see me at whole foods hahaha

i didnt know if she remembered me so that's why i didn't say hi

I hope you both are doing alright though :)

You smiled. And then panicked when you saw the little indicator that said that Ryan was now online.

Shoot.

You made to where Diana was still sleeping, now moving her arm. "Diana, he texted back at 2am and he's online right now and I don't know what to do!" You said.

Diana rubbed her eyes once more, squinting as she tried to look at the phone.

"Girl, just..." She paused, now taking her phone back. You watched in anticipation as Diana looked at the screen. She seemed to be looking at it for a while before she started typing back.

"Wait, what are you doing?" You asked, trying to lounge for the phone, but Diana moved it away from your reach. She rolled over to the other side of the bed, pulling the covers on top of her as you tried to get her phone back.

After a good minute of not knowing what Diana was saying, Diana poked her head out of the blanket and set her phone down next to you before flopping back on her bed entirely, turning to the side and closing her eyes.

"There. Now he can bother you." She mumbled, before going back to her sleep.

"What do you mean?" You picked up her phone and stared at the screen, feeling shocked as soon as you saw Diana's reply.

hiii we're doing good thanks!!

awww she told me you reminded her of a guy named ryan in high school but didn't know if it was the same guy!

she doesn't have insta but here's her number if you wanna text her! shed like to catch up!

btw congrats on your success!! Definitely following you on tiktok!! :)))

Oh. My. Gosh.

You didn't know why you kept staring at the messages, as if something new would jump up. No, this was it. This was what your sister sent. And now it was directly sent to Ryan without any way you could moderate it.

There was so much to address. Diana told Ryan what you said about how this guy in whole foods reminded you of him. That was embarassing.

She ALSO gave him your number. Now what????????

You decided to place Diana's phone back on her bed and sat up. You had to keep going through the day. What was sent is now sent and there was nothing you could do about it. He had your number now. If he wanted to text you, well...your phone was right there.

So you left the house and went to the breakfast cafe with a lot of anticipation on your mind.

~~~~~

Thank you for reading!! <33

[writtenx]

Finding You - azngami

(part 2)

I'm gonna clarify something to help this fanfic make a little bit of sense.

NSB are all in Minnesota for the weekend for some- I don't know- "visiting-every-members-hometown" video or challenge or whatever.

Because Ryan's back in his hometown and the guys are in this fanfic, it only makes sense.

Sorry for the confusion!

Also!! If you stumbled upon this before reading part 1, go read the first part! Imma put the link right here:

Thank you guys! Have the best morning/afternoon/evening/night where you are :)

~ Your Pov ~

You were out with your sister grabbing lunch. Your parents were working as they usually were and as you both sat down and talked at the patio over subway sandwiches and pop drinks.

"I think later today I'm trying to get that dress I looked at the other day," Diana spoke from across you at the table.

"Which one?" You asked.

Diana leaned forward in his seat, holding out her phone. You peered at the screen at a beautiful white floral sundress.

"Oooh that would look so pretty on you!" You said.

"I know! And I was thinking of topping it with some bows and-"

"Yes, yes, yes!" You smiled as you watched your sister's eyes dance. "That would look so pretty."

Diana smiled and then looked down at her phone. She paused and then blinked, her face changing into confusion.

You froze. "What's up?"

"Um..." Diana blinked and now you were actually concerned.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, um..." Diana paused (she always had to leave you in suspense) and held her phone up.

"I just got a notification that Ryan Nguyen follows me on instagram." Diana said, putting emphasis on his name.

"But I have no idea if that's him, take a look." Diana passed you her phone.

You were confused yourself as you slowly took your sister's device. It was just yesterday that the two of you talked about bumping into someone who reminded you of Ryan, a stranger at Whole Foods who probably went home and never thought more about who he saw. It could be a joke, that would make more sense.

Before looking at the screen, you tilted your head and looked at Diana. "Are you joking with me right now?" You asked.

Diana shook her head. "I wouldn't joke about this. Check his profile and tell me if that's who you saw yesterday."

You sighed and looked down. "Fine." And then you came to a stop.

The username was 'azngami' but his name said "Ryan Nguyen". In his bio there was 'Artist' and then @northstarboys, followed by 'introvert' in the description. He had 735K followers and other subscription features you didn't quite understand. You were taken a back because his profile picture seemed to be the guy who you saw yesterday, but just without glasses so you weren't too sure. That was, until you stared scrolling down.

His page was flashy and filled with concepts and areas for photoshoots where this man looked insanely good. He always was with other people and you were curious as you saw the number of likes and comments. Then you remembered that there was the profile of 'northstarboys', whatever that was. As you clicked that, you began stalking and realizing that this was a group...that was famous??

"Whoa..." You muttered to yourself, seeing comments and fanpages alone of Ryan, your high school classmate that you had such a big crush on. It seemed you shared those feelings with the world. You saw a tour, you saw shows, you even saw an album.

But you knew as you kept going through, seeing different hairstyles and videos, this was indeed Ryan Nguyen from high school.

How did someone change that much in five years?

But also...how is this name following your sister?

You looked up at Diana who looked at your face, wondering what you'd say.

"It is him." You said, handing your sister her phone back.

She blinked. "Him as in the guy you saw at Whole Foods yesterday, or him as in your crush Ryan Nguyen from high school?" She asked.

You sat back stunned. You were grateful you even had a chance knowing him seeing all the success he had now. And you were proud, he was deserving of everyone seeing his light.

"Both." You replied.

"But..." You say up straighter in your seat. "What I'm wondering is, how would he follow you?" You asked.

Diana looked up at the sky in thought. Then she smiled. "Because, he couldn't stop thinking about you after bumping into you yesterday, and so he had to find you, duh."

You shook your head. "That doesn't make sense...how would he have remembered me? We didn't even talk at Whole Foods, we just smiled at each other."

Diana shrugged. "I don't know. Should I text him?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, no. Text him what?" You said, with panic rising in your chest.

"Don't worry about it." Diana smiled.

"Diane," You scolded. She never liked when you said Diane, because it wasn't her name.

"Don't text him. Please." You said.

Diana didn't say anything for a few seconds but after seeing your face she nodded. "Fine. But I'll at least follow him back?" She said.

Before you could say anything, Diana held her phone up in the air and faced in your direction to see her press the accept and follow button. She smiled and then put her phone down on the table.

"Done. Man, I've never had someone famous follow me. Also, he looks good, dangg." Diana said, now scrolling through his profile.

"Look, this picture right here, his caption says "Are you in love?" and every single comment is like "in love with YOU" oh my goodness." Diana smiled.

"Girl, you lucked up. At least you could say you knew him before he became famous. And, at least he remembers you five years later!" Diana did a happy dance.

You shook your head, not able to cover the small smile that was drawing on your face. "Well....when you put it like that..."

"Ooh I liked this hair color. Blonde hit different. Dang, how could I not have remembered him in school?" Diana asked, now having fun going through his pictures.

"Well, I mean, you were a sophomore while we were seniors so. And you were obsessed with your boyfriend-"

Diana looked up from her phone and glared. "Did not have to talk about that."

You held up your hands in defense. "Hey, I did not say his name!"

Diana smiled faintly as she was looking at Ryan's reels. "He's very pretty. I can approve of this."

"Oh!" Her face suddenly lit up. "I'm gonna take a picture of you for my story!" She said.

You made a face. "What? Why?"

"Because we're having our cute little girl lunch and I was meaning to do it before. C'mon, I'm a great photographer. All of my most liked posts are pictures with you in it." She said.

You groaned.

"I'll do like a cute date one. Like a picture of you looking away, okay?" Diana held her phone up, going into photography mode. "Or put your elbow on the table, and then just rest your knuckles under your chin....perfect."

You didn't even care anymore as you posed for your sister, some nice ones, some silly ones. You knew what she was doing, of course. Because you didn't have social media, and now that Ryan followed Diana, he now could have a chance to see you on her instagram. If he hadn't already.

Seriously, how could he find your sister? Where did he go to look? And did it really mean that he first was trying to find you instead?

Whatever the reason, Diana had put the pictures on her story and gave a satisfying smile as she sunk back in her chair.

"And now we wait." She said.

You sighed. "You are unbelievable."

"Not as unbelievable as seeing Ryan glow upppp." She giggled, going back to her food.

He did look great now, of course, in a grown way. But to you, he always looked good, and you were very grateful for that.

...

~Ryan~

The door kicked open.

"I'm gonna f'cking kill one of you." Ryan sneered as the NSB members looked up at him.

He was mad. No, mad was an understatement. He was raged.

The boys haven't seen Ryan that mad in a while. Of course he'd get annoyed, but usually within reason. There was a look in his eye and a stance that wasn't ready to back down.

"Who the f'ck took my phone?" Ryan asked, pointing his finger to the guys who were in the living room.

"Whoa, Ryan, chill. What's this about? Your phone is right there, cuh?" Reggie said as he pointed to where Ryan had his phone in his hand.

Oliver called. "What's wrong?"

Ryan ignored those who were oblivious to the situation and went straight to where Justin and Darren were sitting by the table.

"I'm not f'king kidding around, I will beat the h'll- who took my phone and went on my Instagram?" Ryan said, going straight to Darren. He grabbed his shirt by the neckline and looked right at him.

He could tell. It was definitely Darren.

Ryan could feel from beside them Justin was trying to hold Ryan back.

"Ryan, chill."

"Don't tell me to f'cking chill!" Ryan shouted.

He could now see in the corner of his eye that the rest of the guys were now standing. He could see them now, throwing concerned looks at each other, wondering what was going on with Ryan. And Ryan tried, he really tried to take deep breaths and calm himself down but each time he did he would remember the notification he woke up with.

'Diana started following you'

And when he checked her profile just the same as he did last night, he found something changed. He was following her.

He did not follow her last night.

Which meant that someone pressed follow for him.

Ryan didn't like that.

He could feel Darren start pushing Ryan until he himself stood up. The two faced each other and Ryan glared. It took everything in him to not throw himself and start punching.

"What the f'ck is wrong with you?" Ryan asked.

"You kept sweating over this girl, you didn't have the f'cking balls to do anything about it!" Darren said.

Ryan couldn't believe what he was hearing. He gave a sarcastic chuckle, the type he only did when he was furious. "Oh, so I asked you for your help, right? That's why I asked you to go through my phone while I didn't know and got you to my Instagram-"

Darren started shouting himself. "And this is a big deal? This is what you're about to jump me for? Just because you can't follow this girl?"

"That's the thing, she doesn't have instagram that's her sister, you f'cking dumb'ss!" Ryan shouted back.

Darren paused for a second, a flash of a look on his face before he continued. "Well, you don't have to follow her back!"

"I already am, you made me f'cking follow her first!" Ryan yelled.

No one really said anything for a few seconds, the guys just watched Ryan and Darren. Until Kane walked over and grabbed Ryan by the shoulders.

"Ryan, here, take a deep breath. Just, come with me." He said, wrapping his arm around.

Ryan clicked his teeth. "I can walk, man" He said, and Kane immediately let go, getting what Ryan meant.

Sometimes when Ryan was really frustrated, Kane would be the one who would get which buttons to push and which ones not to push. Sometimes Kane would come too strong with affection, but Ryan wouldn't be that evil to him, he would just let him know that he could let go of him. And Kane would.

They went back to Kane's room where Ryan could hear Darren arguing with the rest of the guys explaining what had happened.

"Okay, so what's going on? All I'm hearing is a girl, and instagram, and a follow...?" Kane said with his voice trailing off.

Ryan sighed as he paced through the room. When he finally found his center he stopped pacing and looked over at Kane, who clearly didn't know anything that was going on.

"Basically, yesterday when I went to Whole Foods I bumped into a girl that I liked in high school. I got too nervous to say anything to her in case she didn't remember me, and it got to a point where we looked at each other, but nothing happened. I came home last night, told Darren and Justin and Oliver about it, and before I went to sleep, Justin and Darren were chilling in my room. I was trying to look her up on my phone since I haven't seen her in like, five years or some sh't."

Ryan ran fingers over his face and let out a breath once more, releasing some of the strain he already felt was building on his shoulders.

"I couldn't find her Instagram, but I found her younger sister's. Throughout her page there was a lot of pictures of my former crush. I was tired so I went to sleep but I guess I left my phone out in the open to her sister's page, the next thing I know, I'm waking up and I see the notification that Diana follows me back on Instagram. Meaning, that while I was sleeping Darren went through my phone and followed. I've never been so embarrassed." Ryan admitted.

Kane didn't say anything for a few seconds just as Ryan grabbed his phone and stared. He was actually following Diana now. And it was too late to say anything, since she followed him back. Which meant that she remembered him too. Or maybe she told you about it, and you actually remembered who he was.

Ryan had no idea.

"I don't think this is anything to be embarrassed of." Kane finally spoke out softly.

Ryan fought the urge to roll his eyes and say 'you would', but he sided against it. He knew Kane was optimistic, and it didn't stop him for always accepting Kane to be there. Whether he said it out loud or not, he did appreciate whenever Kane was present.

"We all have these moments in life where we don't understand. But maybe, I don't know, you say you haven't seen this girl, your former crush in five years. And then you follow her sister on Instagram, and she follows you back. Maybe that's for a reason. All we know is we can't take back what Darren did. Even though it was invasive-"

"It was so f'cking invasive." Ryan added bitterly.

"I know, and we can talk to him about that. But I heard him out there. He said something about having to do it since you were scared."

Ryan scoffed and made a face. "That doesn't give him the right to-"

"I know, I know, but y'know Darren. He always looks out for his brothers. Maybe not in the best way, but when you look deep down there's always a good intention behind. He didn't even know it was her sister. If he knew he probably wouldn't have done it." Kane reasoned.

Ryan shook his head, shoving his hands in his pockets. "It still doesn't shake the fact that he did it."

"I know, but nothing shakes the fact that he did it. Look, Darren followed your crush's sister on your Instagram. You punching the lights out of him, does that do anything to change the fact that he did it?"

Ryan didn't say anything, but his silence spoke volumes.

"Sometimes we spend too much time fueling all of our anger and bitterness towards what's already happened. It hasn't even been a while 24 hours, but it's already history. So now you just have to work on what to do now going forward, and talk through how you would've liked it to be handled in a very mature way." Kane said.

Ryan stared at Kane just as Kane shot his infamous smiles.

"Please?" He said.

Ryan still gave a blank face but finally sighed. "Alright. It's past, I can't do anything to change it. And I know it may have seemed stupid to fight with Darren over something with a girl. That sh't is not worth it at all." Ryan said.

He smiled, feeling the bit of change. "Imma need a bit of time to myself to just think of what to do, but...I will talk to Darren. He didn't need to go that far, but I guess I can understand where he was coming from."

Kane's face broke into a grin. "Awww, I knew you had it in you! I'm proud of you." He said, planting his hand on Ryan's shoulder.

Ryan sighed. "I'm going to my room now." He excused himself.

Ryan took the time to collect his thoughts. It truly wasn't the worst thing in the world, that was true. There wasn't fireworks that went off. No one died, nothing of the sort. But he did wish that there was a bit of a warning. That was all.

After a few minutes of self-reflection, the door opened slightly and Ryan looked up, seeing Darren's face.

"Can I come in?" He asked hesitantly.

Ryan didn't say anything, but could only nod.

Darren walked in very slowly, like a kid who just came back from a timeout. He seemed unsure of himself. Ryan thought that Kane must have talked to Darren, because he rarely saw him like this.

Darren held his hands behind his back. "I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for invading your privacy. I seriously thought it would be something funny, or even that you would be okay with me doing this for you, but I didn't tell you anything and it was my fault. I shouldn't have done what I did, and I'll know that for next time so..." Darren bowed his head. "I hope you can forgive me."

Ryan inhaled deeply, just releasing some of the tension. Then he looked up at Darren and shook his head.

"It's okay. There isn't really anything so hard to forgive you for. Of course, I wish you would've told me or something, but...I recognize that what you did is already in the last and me choosing to mope around doesn't change the fact that it already happened so...it's cool." Ryan gave a nod. "Just don't do that again."

Darren flashed a smile. "I won't, bro." He said, holding his hand out for a dap. Ryan did so and started feeling better.

"You know what though?" Darren asked.

"What?"

"I think you should reach out to her. Well, her sister at least." Darren advised, leaning against the wall.

Ryan sighed. "Why would I want to drag her sister into anything?" He asked.

"It wouldn't be that big of a deal. Just...y'know, ask her if you both went to the same high school, and then tell her that you thought you saw her sister at Whole Foods yesterday." Darren said.

Ryan made a thinking noise. "I don't know about that." He said.

"C'mon. There is nothing wrong about that text. It's cute and simple, and it sets the message straight."

"How do you even know she'll answer back or not?"

"Well she followed you back. She could've just been like, 'yo who is this random creep that's following me?' or whatever. Also because you're Ryan. You could get any b'tch you want." Darren smiled.

Ryan shook his head. "It's not that easy, bro."

"Yeah it is, man. Obviously she remembers you."

Ryan took a minute to himself, not saying anything, but just thinking. He could totally do it, it sort of made sense what Darren said. Of course, it would be easier if it was messaging you yourself, but you didn't have socials and he respected that. He was wondering if it was worth it to go about his way and message your sister concerning you. What if Diana just left Ryan on read or something? Then he'd be embarrassed for sure. One of his biggest fears is being rejected.

Ryan fought with his own doubts and thoughts, the debates of whether or not he should or shouldn't reach out kept playing like a broken record in his head. Finally Ryan rolled his eyes and scoffed. He was being ridiculous. There was only one thing to do.

"Okay, Darren, get over here." Ryan said, gesturing for Darren to sit next to him on the edge of his bed.

Darren smiled. "What?" He asked, though looking at his face, he already knew.

"I'm doing the damn thing, help me with what I'm gonna write." Ryan said.

Darren put his hands up in celebration as he danced. "Yay!! I actually convinced Ryan to do something! I'm a genius!"

"K, don't get cocky. I can totally do this myself. Relax." Ryan threatened.

"You can, it'll just be vanilla. Like the most basic sh't ever." Darren laughed.

Ryan rolled his eyes. "Oh my gosh."

They ended up working through it, Darren being the guy to shout "no, that's too boring", Ryan being the one to shout "you're stupid", but after it all it ended up working out.

Ryan felt a mixture of emotions when he pressed send. He knew he was overreacting, but he always couldn't help but be curious. What if? What would Diana say?

And would he finally get the chance to talk to you?

...

thank you for readingggg this chapter guys!!<333

[writtenx]

Finding You - azngami

(part 1)

Hey guys!!! This is my first fanfic on Ryan, it will be in parts. I'm a somewhat new, but like re-new star if that makes sense. I knew of NSB (Ryan first) in 2022 and then there was like this random fallout, but we backkk and better than ever!

The idea for this fic just randomly came to me. I kind of imagine this as like black haired long hair Ryan, so an example would be like, how he looked in the "Opening ALL OF YOUR GIFTS From Tour" video, like the most recent one he did from that series. (There's the picture by the title of what I imagine the hair to look for this, but you can imagine him however you like to)

Just some warnings before we begin:

1. I don't write smut at all. I'm not comfortable writing it so this fanfic but also all my works will not have smut in it, you're never gonna find it here!

2. I don't cuss. But I know the guys do a lot lol, and so for this, there are words there, but i put this sign: (') in replacement for some letters, but it's enough for you all to still get what I'm trying to say. An example would be "No b'tches"- you see?? It's not that bad

3. This fanfic is in "You" pov. No y/n or anything like that, just you. But it is a split Pov between you and Ryan, but for Ryan's it will be in 3rd person. So this fic is 2nd and 3rd person.

I hope you enjoy this ahhhh I'm so excited and we'll keep updating parts as we go along!!

Happy reading!!! <3333

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a super foggy day out, your favorite type of weather. You were currently getting out of your car, glancing at your handwritten grocery list. This may have been an unpopular opinion, but you loved errand day. Of course, not at the expense of overly priced items that you sometimes complained about in your head but bought anyway, but more so the taking off part. You liked to think about when you were a kid and going with your parents, eyeing everything a shop could offer while your mom would constantly look back from the aisles to the list in her hand. Now at 23, you were the one becoming an adult, doing all the things necessary but being responsible.

Your younger sister Diana who was two years younger than you, knew your love for the going to get groceries, so she left that for you to do, while she would wait for you to come back and make dinner. You appreciated that, because you didn't cook much. Even if there were days you wanted to help your sister out, she would kick you out of the kitchen (quite literally, if you were honest).

Speaking of your sister...

Your phone started ringing just as you were walking to the local Whole Foods not far from your house when you looked at the caller ID and then pressed talk, putting your phone to your ear.

"Hello?"

"Hey, while you're out there can you get onions real quick? We don't have any left."

You did a quick scan down your paper as you walked, looking for what you thought you had written. You were right, it turned out. You did remember the onions.

"Yeah, I have it on my list."

"And-"

"Garlic's on there too, don't worry." You interrupted. You knew your sister by now.

Diana paused abruptly, the silence on the other end of the phone concluding your assumption that she was about to say garlic.

"Well shoot, that's about it. Thanks."

You chuckled and then said your goodbyes before hanging up. Then you walked in to the store.

The cold of the store ran a shiver through your back and you folded your arms over your shoulder walking in. You grabbed a small cart because you weren't getting a lot of items, and then you started your shopping.

Everything was great. You were finding everything that you needed from the list, and tossed a treat-yourself snack in the cart. You did have a habit of treating yourself even when there was no great reason or it.

After a good ten minutes of covering the list, it was by the time you were wrapping up that you realized you needed to go to the produce section once more to get some basil. As you walked back to the fresh green area, you spotted just one guy at the produce section.

He wore all black, the hood of his hoodie over his head, but there were black strands by the sides of his face. He also had silver headphones on his hood (however that worked). He wore glasses and a dog tag necklace over his black shirt. He stood, hands in his pocket, and was completely unbothered eyeing the Bok Choy. Of course, you weren't trying to stare at the lone guy, but he did stop you in a somewhat trance. He looked like he could model, and had pretty features, and seeing him almost reminded you of a guy you used to like in high school named Ryan.

Ryan was a smart and attentive guy, but very too himself and quiet (which was exactly your type). The two of you would talk if you had a project together or to compare test answers, and you'd see him some weekends at the recreational center he'd volunteer for as coaching the basketball team that your little cousin was a part of. (Which was the CUTEST thing ever). You often wondered how Ryan was now, since last you heard he left for LA. You didn't have any social media and you both weren't the closest people in high school so the years had passed and the only thing you could do was wish him well wherever he was.

You couldn't help but look back at the guy in the store. He reminded you so much of Ryan. As you went back to your own grocery shopping, there were thrown looks back and forth between the greens and the guy. At one point as he walked over to get a plastic bag which was near where you were, he looked over at you and your eyes locked.

You couldn't look away, now that you were both looking at each other. You should've probably looked away, but for some strange reason you couldn't.

The corner of his lip lifted in a small and awkward half smile before he continued his shopping, passing you by. You smiled back, shyly and then grabbed the basil you needed before bolting out the store. In your errands routine, the chances of running into someone cute never happened, so you weren't going to forget this.

Especially if he looked like that guy you really liked back in high school.

...

By the time you got home, you were greeted by the sound of Diana's loud singing. She did that usually over music, but this time it was in the air. She was a silly person, never took too much seriously and you admired her for it.

"Hello!" You called, placing the grocery bags on the floor.

"When it comes to you, there's no criiiiiime!"

You made a face. "Hello? Diana?"

"Let's take both of our souls and intertwiiiine!" Before you could say anything else, your younger sister Diana emerged from the kitchen, holding up a wooden spoon like it was a microphone.

"When it comes to you," She pointed over at you, making her way towards where you were. You laughed and shook your head as Diana danced to the grocery bags, picking them up while still managing to sing a Justin Bieber throwback.

"Don't be blind, let me speak from my heart when it..." Diana looked up at you and gave a look, holding the silverware microphone to you face.

You rolled your eyes. This happened every day.

"C'mon, you gotta sing it, all of MSG is waiting!" Diana joked, gesturing to the audience members.

You laughed. "Oh, is that where we are now?"

Diana laughed with you and the two of you headed to the kitchen, the song dispelling its echoes into thin air.

"Thanks for getting the groceries. I think it's spaghetti today." Diana said. You followed her to the counter, unpacking.

"No worries. You know errands stops are my favorite."

"And I'll never understand why. Seriously, you're quieter than me. What part of going out to shop makes you happy to indulge in?" Diana asked.

You shrugged, trying to think of the question. "I don't know. It's my own time even if it's surrounded by people. If that makes sense. I don't know, you'd think you'd like it, you're all outgoing and everything." You said.

Diana scoffed. "Yeah, that's the problem. I can't even go to Whole Foods without being recognized. Some days I don't want to be social. Plus, it can be a chore." She said.

You nodded, understanding where she was coming from. It did make sense. You could see where Diana and even your parents were coming from, and even though they didn't understand your joy, they left you with that responsibility.

You clapped your hands as you remembered your time just spent looking into a beautiful stranger's eyes.

"Oh! Speaking of Whole Foods, I have to tell you something." You said.

Your sister was eyeing the basil, tilting her head to the side. You at first were scared, hoping that it was the right thing, but then was relieved to see her place it on the counter and turn to the other items to examine.

"What's up?"

"I saw this really cute guy at the store," You started.

Diana flashed a proud smile as she checked the ingredients. "Okay, okayyyy"

You started to feel yourself blushing.

"Chill, nothing happened." You needed to clarify. That was your sister. She always hyped up the littlest things making them seem bigger than what they actually were.

"But while we were in the produce section, I was grabbing basil and he was getting I think some Bok Choy, and as we were passing by, he smiled at me and it was so cute." You said, allowing the girlhood of yourself to bask in delusion that it was a big deal. Only for a second though.

"Okayyy!! Cute!!" Diana exclaimed as she was put everything from the bags away. She was very good and indulging in conversation at the same time be in the zone when it came to cooking.

"But the thing is..." You started, thinking back to the black haired beauty in the produce aisle.

"He reminds me so much of- do you remember Ryan, that guy I liked all of high school?" You asked, turning to look at your sister.

She set her tomato paste can down and looked up at the ceiling in thought. Then she nodded.

"He was like, what, really smart, kinda cute but in like a nerdy way? Glasses? Quiet guy Ryan?"

You nodded. That sounded like your lover alright. (Well, unrequited lover anyway).

"Yeah, I remember you were obsessed with that dude." Diana said.

That caused you to smile shyly. "Yeah, then after graduation he moved to LA and that was the last time I saw him. And, with no social media, it's not like I can find him either." You muttered the last sentence to yourself.

Diana chuckled. "You made that decision."

"I know. And it's a good one, I don't regret that." You said as you walked over to the small table-for-two by the corner. You sat in one of the chairs, fully aware that you would be ranting to your sister in the middle of a cooking session.

You sighed. "I guess for these past five years, crushes would come and go, whatever, but...he would always be in the back of my mind. I just wondered what it would be like if I was to see him again." You spoke your mind.

Diana nodded and hummed. Her back was to you as she started her work, but she was listening.

"But...the guy that I saw at Whole Foods today, he reminded me so much of Ryan. But he looks different, they're not the same guy, he just...just looking at him to me back to a place that made me extremely happy and nostalgic." You said.

"Aww. Maybe it's Ryan's twin brother?" Diana suggested.

You shook your head. "Hello? Obsessive, remember? If Ryan had a pet dog I would've found out the name, origin, favorites snacks and everything else. I think I would know if he had a twin brother."

"Sooooo maybe it was Ryan is what I'm hearing?"

You groaned. "Ugh. Imagine."

You shook your head and gave a small smile. "I'm gonna go upstairs and change. Be right back."

"Okay! See yaaaa!" Diana waved to you and you waved back before going up the stairs.

When you got to your room you made a beeline straight for your dresser. You searched until you found your senior yeearbook, flipping through the pages where everyone signed. And then looking at Ryan's message you smiled, the feeling of how it was receiving his short but sweet well wishes coming back to you just like it was for the first time.

i'm gonna miss science and math class with you, thank you for all the memories :)

wishing you all the best in university and beyond!

- ryan

Then you went through the yearbook, taking a walk down memory lane of your life five years ago. Occasionally in the sports section, you saw pictures of Ryan, and when you got to the graduation photos, he was there too. It was just like you remembered. He was cute and pretty, but for some strange reason, his eyes reminded you of that guy in Whole Foods.

Your mind went back and forth. It wasn't like it absolutely couldn't happen at all. Sure, Ryan moved to LA and that was the last you heard of him, but maybe he was back in town for family or something else.

But when were you so lucky in life, that you got a chance to see your really serious crush five years later? Did that really happen in life?

Even then, it didn't really matter, considering the fact that you didn't speak to him. So, it probably wasn't him to begin with.

You looked back down at the Ryan's graduation photo in your yearbook. He kind of shared the same features. You didn't have time to make out all of his face, but there was something similar. You just didn't know.

Was that or was that not Ryan Nguyen from high school?

....

~ Ryan ~

It never bothered Ryan to walk into a house filled with cameras.

It became second nature. He had been in this house for 3 years now, and where bills needed to be paid, content needed to be made. There was only one problem with that.

To walk into a house with cameras meant that there was always the risk of being in them. Ryan was usually caught off guard and gave this low hating-everyone vibe that the stars were accustomed to and grown to love. There were people who made videos like "Ryan being done with NSB for 6 minutes" on YouTube, or little moments that could be used for a short or tiktok. They were used to his nonchalant tone. He read a comment last week where some stars crowned him their "Side-Eyed King".

Normally, he wouldn't have minded. Ryan would be more concerned if he didn't walk into a noisy house filled with laughs or arguments across the room. He just wished that there would be a slight freedom in this moment as he stepped inside, where he could just slip into his room and stay there for the rest of the day without interruptions.

But that freedom wasn't for today.

It was Sebastian that greeted him first, and Ryan looked right into the lens, trying hard not to look obvious that something was actually wrong. Recording meant vlogging (or pranking, whichever one in this house), and either or meant editing, and then editing meant posting. For the eyes of the public.

"Well, look who it is. If it isn't, the real Azngami! How you doing, sexy sir?" Seb stated, coming right at him.

Ryan averted his eyes to the ground. Even if it was a normal day, there would still be the expectation of the weird look. Which Ryan gave.

"What do you want, man?" Ryan finally asked, his voice dropping low.

"Nothing, just..." Seb laughed as he pointed the camera to Ryan's grocery bags.

"It was Ryan's turn to get the groceries." He told the internet. "I'm actually surprised you did it." Seb said.

Ryan narrowed his eyes as Seb laughed, bringing the camera back to Ryan's face.

"What, like I've never bought my own groceries before? Get lost, dude." Ryan started to walk away from the camera. "I ain't never seen your broke 'ss buy a f'ckin vegetable bro, I know you not talkin'".

"C'mon, why you gotta be mean? Look, I'll take the groceries for you." Seb reached over while holding up the camera.

"See guys?" Seb talked to the frame. "I'm a very nice, very demure person." He said.

Ryan closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. "What is this, yo? Try not to cringe for 24 hours?" He asked.

Seb stuck his bottom lip out to the camera and pouted as he placed his free hand on his heart. "You wound me, Ryan. You wound me. And here I thought you actually had a heart." He said.

Ryan stood with his hands in his pockets for a second, just looking at Seb. When Seb noticed Ryan wasn't giving a big reaction, he turned back and looked over at Ryan, laughing.

"Dude, what's wrong?" He asked.

"What do you want from me? Go bother Darren, dude." Ryan requested.

"Dude I already did!"

"Okay, so go down the list. There's 6 other people in this group so...I'm going to my room. And take the groceries out of the bag please instead of just leaving them on the counter!" Ryan called, turning his back on Seb and walked towards his room.

He didn't really care if Seb caught that all on camera, or would even post it. For some strange reason, everyone found Ryan's moods to be funny and relatable.

But when Oliver heard the commotion from the living room, he waited until Ryan was in his room before walking over.

..

Ryan's door was closed, of course. If he had it his way, he'd have his door locked. But there were no locks in the house and Ryan had to suffer for it. At least right now, he could suffer in peace. Though it wasn't really suffering. Today wasn't the worst day in the world.

No, today just happened to be the day where he saw a girl he thought he would never see again.

You.

You burned in his mind like something hot, and even though it had been years, the feeling was the same. How you grew, with your beautiful eyes and shy smile. Ryan wondered if you knew that it was him, but probably not. You both haven't spoken in a long time. Last Ryan checked, you didn't even have any socials.

Ryan scratched his head and then grabbed his phone as he sat on the edge of his bed. He knew this was quite childish, but there he was entering your name on the search bar. He tried your first and last name, then Minnesota, but that brought him to other people. Why did so many people share your name, anyway?

There was a knock on the door and Ryan sighed.

"What?"

"Ryan, it's me Oli, can I come in?"

Ryan paused. At least it wasn't Darren.

Ryan ran fingers through his hair and then leaned back in his seat, staring at the wall in front of him.

"Yeah."

The door opened slowly and Ryan saw in the corner of his eye that Oli emerged. He stayed by the door, but closed it behind him.

"Hey, I couldn't help but notice you and Seb. Was wondering if everything's alright." Oli spoke.

"I meaaannn..." Ryan's voice trailed in thought as he looked at Oli. Then he shrugged.

"It's cool. Just some stuff happening at Whole Foods, bro." Ryan answered, his gaze now zeroed in on his PC set.

"What kinda stuff? Do you wanna talk about it?" Oliver asked.

To be fair, Ryan didn't want to talk about it. Not fully. But, there was a small part of him deep down that knew that if anyone genuinely cared enough, it was Oliver. He didn't want to add onto stress, so Ryan figured he would just say it bluntly.

"It's nothing big man, I just bumped into someone who I may have had feelings for in high school. I don't think she recognized me though. I was going to say hi, but then...I don't know, I just backed off."

Oliver nodded. "Do you regret not talking to her?"

Ryan shrugged. "I mean, it's not bothering me so much, but I mean...maybe. I haven't seen her in like, five years. I would have liked to maybe catch up with each other but that's not happening." He said.

Oliver stood for a few seconds to himself. Then after a few seconds he looked back at Ryan.

"Have you tried looking for her? Like on IG, Tiktok, anything?"

"Nah, she doesn't have social media. I've been trying to just Google her, but that's not getting me anywhere." Ryan said.

Oli pulled out his phone. "What's her name?" He asked.

"What's whose name?" The door suddenly opened and the rest of the guys came in. All except for Seb who was hopefully getting the groceries unpacked, and Reggie, who was probably sleeping.

Ryan closed his eyes and tried to focus on his breathing. Never in any way would he be telling all of them what was happening.

"You've gotta be freakin kidding me." Ryan said under his breath. When he looked up, seeing Darren, Justin, and Kane in view made him want to punch something. But Ryan didn't. He just remained as calm as he could try.

"Ain't y'all got your own rooms and sh't, the f'ck you gotta be in mine for?" Ryan said.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, watch who you're speaking to." Justin said with a laugh.

"Ryan, take deep breaths." Kane suggested, recreating some type of yoga pose.

"See? This is exactly what I'm talking about bro, you're so ungrateful. We literally all came together to check up on you, and this is how you treat us." Darren said, moving over to try and sling his arm on Ryan, but Ryan stood up immediately and walked to the corner of the room.

"Don't touch me."

"We decided to come here, y'know, be here for you, and look at you. You're acting up." Darren said.

"So ungrateful, Ryan." Justin retorted.

Ryan could feel annoyance coming on. Actually, he's been annoyed on his drive to the house.

"Okay, so then leave, hello? No one asked you to come over". He sassed.

"No, see, I'm not like you Ryan. Despite the need to hate on my fellow brother, I would never leave them in a time of need. You need us." Darren said (or more like gaslight- Justin's been influencing him).

Oh. My. Gosh. I can never win in this household, Ryan thought.

"Ryan, we're not trying to bother you, Seb just said that you were crankier than usual. If you need your alone time, we can go, we just wanted to let you know that we're here for you no matter what it is. Okay?" Kane finally broke the ice.

Ryan didn't say anything for a few seconds. He was acting like this was a huge deal even though it wasn't worth anything hating the boys for. He would never let a girl come between the brotherhood he formed with these crazy bunch these last three years.

The thing was, Ryan didn't owe them the story, but he didn't want to place this as such a high thing. He wasn't meant to talk to you, he guessed. That was all.

So Ryan ended up talking to the boys about the situation and how frustrated he got because of it. He listened to their opinions and advice, which all sort of tallied towards trying to find anything of you and reaching out, or just letting it go entirely. And that's what Ryan said he would do.

It was later in the night when Ryan sat next to Justin and Darren who, yes, had overstayed their welcome in his room, but luckily they were both kind of doing their own thing and wasn't bothering Ryan as much.

Ryan laid down at the side of the bed going on instagram, when a thought just entered his mind. He remember that you had a sister named Diana and quickly searched her up on instagram. The first two people were not her at all, he could tell, but the third profile made Ryan sit up in his seat. As he clicked on her page, he felt like thanking God that it was public. And he was even more thankful when he saw one of her recent posts being a birthday post about you.

Ryan smiled as he carefully clicked on the picture, not wanting to like it or do anything that would notify on your sister's phone. And this picture was a few months ago.

You were in a park, right under a tree, smiling at the camera. There was collection photos of you with different poses, and then the last photo being a selfie with Diana and you. You were so pretty in Ryan's eyes. Definitely grown into a woman. He wondered how the last five years have been for you and what you were doing now.

"Yo, did you see the video I sent you?" Darren broke the silence in the room, Ryan almost forgot they were still there.

Because Darren and Justin were sitting closed to each other, Ryan just assumed Darren was talking to Justin.

"Me or Ryan?" Justin asked slowly.

Ryan didn't say anything as he scrolled through Diana's page, finding you every so often. That was until he felt a kick in his back. Ryan's head shot up quickly.

"What are you doing?" He interrogated Darren.

"Dude, I sent you a video, look at it!"

Ryan looked back on his phone. "I'll watch, just give me a second."

"No, watch it now!" Darren said with a smile. When Ryan gave a death glare at him, Darren rolled his eyes.

"C'mon, baby. Is there something more important than me?" He asked.

Ryan wished for the day when Darren talked to him without referring to him as his baby for once. It made Ryan feel weird but mostly annoyed.

"Yes, there are a lot of things more important than what you send me." Ryan said.

At that, Justin's head shot up from where he rested by the pillows. "Like what? You're all blushing and sh't, what are you looking at?"

Darren started to go over to where Ryan was sitting, trying to reach for his phone. "Is it that Whole Foods high school crush? Did you find her?"

Ryan smacked Darren's hand away and moved his phone out of reach before Darren could see anything.

"Dude, don't f'king touch my sh't, yo."

Justin laughed. "Oh, it's definitely her. He found her." Justin sat up. Ryan backed away and stood up before the two of them could have a chance.

"Can you guys just get out of my room? Like, Oli and Kane left a long time ago, why don't you leave?"

"Relax, peanut." Darren said.

"I don't know bruh, I kinda like this bed." Justin said, fully lying back down again.

"Okay," Ryan set his phone down on the counter. "Enough of this sh't-"

Before Darren and Justin could blink, they were both dragged and kicked out of the room. To Ryan's surprise, they didn't come back to bother him for the rest of the night.

Ryan stayed looking at more pictures, the feeling of memories coming in to warm him. He didn't stay long however, as the content of his find allowed him to crash into a deep sleep.

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Thank you for reading this chapterrr<333

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