yourregularproblem

[yourregularproblem]

Is blocking reALLy that powerful of a feeling?

The other day my friend, let's call her Matilda came upto me and said "I blocked him, I did it, I've never done it before but now I did it, he made me do it, he's turned me into this horrible person that I don't like and now I don't know what to be or how to go back to being myself" with a slightly teary eye.

Now don't get me wrong, usually I don't notice the important signs, but as I saw that teary eye, which was very slightly teared up may I remind you, I kept thinking if she is actually facing a whole loss of identity why is she not mourning more? Is it because she is in front of me? Is it because she is actually happy in that relationship and this is just a minor hiccup? Has she run out of tears to cry with this boy?

I completely spaced with that thought as she took the silence as room to share more and opened upto me more and more about the relationship between her and her guy whom I will refer to as 'Yuri' for now. The more I heard from Matilda's side the more I wondered how much I didn't know about the other side, did he feel the same way? Did he not feel that? Was he completely thoughtless about the little things?

Seeing from a third person pov it looked so normal and yet the more Matilda shared the redder she got about "having been with him despite all this and everyone warning her about the red flags" which is why apparently it was easy to share with me because I was not there for the past one year, as I recovered from that taunt I realised that you can never find someone with no red flags, someone you'll never block, a depressing thought isn't it? That you can never find someone who will never ever hurt you or make you angry?

That's when it hit me, you don't need to find someone with no red flags, it's just about finding someone who's red flags blend with your flags or some color, maybe red too, let's call these white flags, the common peace branch between s/o's.

After that as I tuned back in I realised she was almost at the end of her story of that one year with Yuri and so far he seemed like a good guy. And I was dreading the inevitable question coming towards my end, "did I do the right thing?"

Instead of speaking of the whole relationship I chose to talking about the smallest issue at hand,

'To be honest blocking him didn't seem like an all that bad option to me, there's a first for everything and this was your first, take your escape in the reason that you were too attention deprived and angry to think of anything else, as it is he's the one in the wrong. And because he seems like a good chap we both know he's gonna come and try to make it up to you for getting angry at something which seemed unfair but again, aren't all relationships like that?'

This is what I thought I would say...

In reality all that came out of my mouth was

Matilda, you talk of the pain like it's all alright

But I know that you feel like a piece of you's dead inside

You showed me a power that is strong enough to bring sun to the darkest days

It's none of my business, but it's just been on my mind

You can let it go

You can throw a party full of everyone you know

And not invite your family, 'cause they never showed you love

You don't have to be sorry for leaving and growing up

You can see the world, following the seasons

Anywhere you go, you don't need a reason

'Cause they never showed you love

You don't have to be sorry for doing it on your own

I guess it's safe to say that post this I won't have to solve Matilda and Yuri's problems anymore after this, also safe to assume that Matilda felt really powerful after blocking me on this, because come on what's the point in blocking someone whom you will eventually have to unblock and you know it inside, rather block someone who hasn't been there for you at all through the year and sings songs as jokes when you come for genuine advice, that's powerful because you won't have to go back with tail between the legs and unblock them you can actually wait for them to come and try and talk to you. I take my win in knowing I atleast gave them something to patch up and talk about.