zerozines

[zerozines]

starsick/lovesick at the bar. 6/1/25, 1:56 am.

I love ye I love ye I love ye

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I should have been born a guy in 1980 so I could have started an emo band in 2000 and become a shitty bass player with multiple unproven allegations of bisexuality against me lingering well into the 2020s but I didn't and so I'm here (sitting in liberal arts university cafeteria with my nostrils full of blood)

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“Dykes and Their Cars” by Chloe Sherman

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Streaks of Grey running through her hair

Like fingers wearing

Too many rings; I pick up the phone to her

Shrill voice. Like a bird,

I think, as she tells me my rent is

Long Overdue.

I tell her the birds on the tree outside my apartment are not as pretty as they think they are.

She tells me she does not understand.

People have left her before, gone too soon

Broken her heart

Broken their lease

She pinches her lips together whenever she looks at you

Like she is disgusted with what she sees

You are such a cunt, Marsha.

I tell her I will pay rent whenever I damn well please and that she should be happy to have it late

At least then, she can have somebody to call on the phone

And bother with her horrible voice

She tells me I am her worst tenant.

I tell her I wish she were dead.

Neither of us have anyone else to talk to, so we stay on the line.

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I know to be loved how the butcher loves the lamb. I know how to love by letting him skin me, cut away the tissue, saw through my bones, and just hope that I taste good once he's through and cooked me. I hope my blood is good for something. I always want it to be. I don't know how to feel loved by you when you don't ask me to spill it. You've never asked me to lay on the table while you take a blade down my front. You've cradled me, you've let me behave strangely, you've never expected to remove my organs. You give me shelter in your arms and let me lick any of the salty tears away. You decorate me with bows on my ears and set me up in my favorite hay. And still, the butcher calls to me and tells me you've never loved me a day in your life.

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My Bloody Valentine, 1981, George Mihalka

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It’s uncanny how similar Trump is acting like Hitler. People are now doing the Nazi salute. They’re drawing the symbol. The KKK was seen in Kentucky asking people to join them. ICE has been ripping families apart. Companies have pulled back Diversity Initiatives. We’re no longer part of WHO and there won’t be any communication from the CDC at least until February 1st. We’re being censored and the news can’t be trusted. Thousands of Americans didn’t know there were protests against Trump yesterday outside the U.S. Quotes from The Handmaid’s Tale and Anne Frank have been compared to what’s going on right now.

According to The Lemkin Institute for Genocide Studies and Prevention the U.S. has officially been given a red flag alert for Genocide.

I’m exhausted but I will never stop being angry.

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I KNOW LOVE IS REAL BECAUSE IM FULL OF IT

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the only prayer i need is in this slow morning of dappled sunlight shining through the sliver of open curtain. i lay my head back onto your chest like an altar, a peck left on your cheek as an offering to the powers that be. perhaps calling this "morning" is generous, at 2:32 pm. whatever. it's sunday. at least to us. right here, now. my church-day best a pair of flannel pajama pants, and yours my old t-shirt. if believing in God was as easy as whispering "5 more minutes" to the ceiling, i think the guy would have stood a chance. for now, faith remains hidden out from the chill of my room full of winter. under the sheets. warm skin. sleep-filled eyes. and this is the first life i've met you in, but i know the dust we are from and the ash we will return to are the same.

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I'm a dyke before I'm a man but I'm a man before I'm a woman and I'm a fag before I'm a boy and I'm a girl somewhere in my history and my pronouns don't matter [but they do] and how you perceive me doesn't matter [but it does] and this tape is on too tight and it feels better than anything else

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btw you will miss this in 5 or 10 years. memory will smooth these circumstances down like a river stone, and you will find yourself longing for a shade of light or a moment of this particular innocence. you don't know about what happens next, and one day that will be the most alluring thing of all. don't leave it all for nostalgia. have a nice night now, whatever night it happens to be.

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collage for the next zine..... hopefully putting that out in February.....

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As the year is ending soon... this is your friendly reminder that you didn’t waste your year. any moments of happiness or comfort, any small accomplishments, they all matter. this has been a really hard year, and simply surviving is something to be proud of. 🤎

[zerozines]