zoemillinwrites

[zoemillinwrites]

Honestly, I love it when characters relapse. When someone who’s gotten over their anger issues falls into a situation so out of their depth they fall back on their old habits. When someone who’s learned to open up becomes a recluse again in order to cope with something outside their control.

There’s just something so horrible, so toxic, about watching a character grow and then slip back into their old selves in order to cope, bc you know they still care, that they’re the same inside, but watching them hurt so hard they don’t know what else to do brings a sense of catharsis.

[zoemillinwrites]

reblog if you’re okay with people writing fanfics of your fanfics and/or fanfics inspired by your fanfics

[zoemillinwrites]

On my hands and knees begging for a regulus’s pov of the Great French Beatdown of 1976 🧎🧎

hi! omg! i don't think this will make it into the fic, but I can give you the general play by play from reg's pov:

ugh there's sirius getting onto the train with all his friends. what a loser. I'm heir now and I'm surprised he's actually still alive/coming back to school. i low key expected him to be too ashamed to come back

oop he sees me

oop he's chasing me this is so embarrassing I'm gonna get my ass beat in front of everyone

sirius is locking me in a compartment with him & now he's calling me names & yelling at me for being loyal to the family & our values

does he honestly expect me to denounce them like he did? because I won't.

haha he mispronounced a word, what an idiot

I shouldn't have called him an idiot I'm now being shoved out the train window

[zoemillinwrites]

i don't go on reddit often at all so i generally have no idea what's going on over there, but i logged on this morning and saw a post saying that only the same few fics are recommended over and over again on the wolfstar sub, and the fics that post mentioned were cadence, atyd, cr and brave face?!??! hello!! my fic alongside those!?! not exaggerating i gasped and gripped my heart and closed that tab asap in a fit of nerves. anyway, thank you so much to everyone who might have recommended BF or has talked about it over on reddit 💞💞💞💞💞

here's a list of my fic recs just in case anybody is on the lookout for some other wolfstar to read. i want to add more to this list when i have a min!

[zoemillinwrites]

cleo's garden

[zoemillinwrites]

Wolfstar wip recs! Works in progress are such a big part of fandom, and I need to be better about reading and recommending them. I'm open to suggestions as well!

***If you're reading any, also give the author love if you at all can, I'm trying to be better about that too***

My current ones I can find in notes:

•The Ups and Downs of Inevitability by depressed_and_nauseous: Hogwarts au (no background relationship rn)

•maybe time running out is a gift by @messrsrarchives mcd, Remus with cancer decision to stop treatment (background jily)

•catch me on the way down by raggedypond mcd fic, reg is dying and Sirius has to make end of life decisions, meets Remus at hospital

•Black's Anatomy by @grasslesss greys anatomy au

•beautiful boy (beautiful boy au) and we grew up in spite of it (Remus has a twin at Hogwarts divergent mcd) by peachyybabe @lavenderhaze

•Tender is the touch (of someone that you love too much) by @purplefiction-ao3 remus is waiting for heart transplant (background jily)

•Would That I by third_crow Hogwarts soulmate au (background jegulus)

•Underneath It All by @kaymardsa texting au (background jily)

•Without You by beautywolfstar @daffodilsonaprettystring Titanic au (background jegulus)

•Let Me Believe (Ever After) by @brigidfaye ever after: a Cinderella story au (jegulily)

•Modern Day Moses by krabapple @severedreamerfox post 1st war divergent mpreg (background jily)

•Tic Tic Boom by @fictionboysarebetter Remus with tourettes at Hogwarts (background jily)

•The Standard Book Of Spells series by imparfait @je-suis-imparfait adorable wolfstar, hurt/comfort, no voldy au (the most recent is complete but series is wip and one of my faves) (background jily)

•While I breathe, I hope by @marigold-hills divergent post Hogwarts, remus expelled after prank

•One More to Love by @krethes @theresthesnitch a/b/o Wolfstarbucks

•Give Me A Sign by @theresthesnitch magical soulmate au, Remus is deaf (background jily)

•Blinded Fate by FatedEcho star wars au (background jily)

•amicus curiae by femme_de_lettres @femme--de--lettres law school au fantastic disability rep (background jegulus)

•Parenthood For Dummies by Middleofamoment wolfstar raising teddy and adopting OC (part of series) (background jily)

•The Point of Vanishing by @greenibis (59k) fabulous look at the boys at Hogwarts. (background jily)

•Coparenting With Benefits by @m00neroni (38k wip 6/22 chapters) a/b/o mpreg fwb (background jily)

•As the Worm Moon Dies by @rollercoasterwords different magical system very au

•on another ocean by @colgatebluemintygel (133k WIP ) modern au, vacation, pining and oblivious idiots in love. (background jily)

•Vaincre by @lumosinlove sweater weather sequel (hockey) (background jily)

•Four To The End by @dovahtobi long fic of Hogwarts. This is year 4 (96k, 19/? ch.)

•Language Lessons: B-Sides by MsAlexWP @languagelessonswolfstar (background jily)

•disintegration by moonymoment @mayescapade vampire Sirius and Hunter remus

•wip or maybe abandoned but good: Of Leaves and Stars (modern magical texting, trans remus and genderfluid sirius)

•Of Initials and Postscripts same authors and status (Hogwarts era, remus is homeschooled and sirius is his penpal) both by irrationalmoony & LadyAmina

•hide your fires by bizarrestars @starsworth (reg/Kingsley main, plenty of black family dynamics, harry and wolfstar)

---And these are what's coming on wip tbr/recs from my lovely friends

•marginalia by @spindrifters magical au

• of his bones by MesserMoon

•A Love Like the Movies by Acewitch @acewitch-writes

•How To Jeopardise Your Friendship With Remus Lupin by @amberlink

New addition

•Brave Face by zoe_millin_writes @zoemillinwrites WIP multiple pov but Sirius is primary. It's so good

[zoemillinwrites]

[zoemillinwrites]

🎠

[zoemillinwrites]

echoing the general feeling, this chapter was just … really cute. and fluffy. and lovely to read. 

I’ve missed Remus, it was good to have him back !! And his list of good qualities, i can’t even, he’s too adorable. He’s employable now ladies and gentleman, such a good quality to have 😂❤️‍🩹

the folder 😭

and Sirius out here crafting his masterplan to get his man back, he’s not playing around this time, folks ! he means business !!!

also ready for the animagi shenanigans to come hehe

one thing I wanted to ask :

“I…” Sirius started and paused and started back up. He'd looked a little shifty. “I had an idea. I wanted to ask if you…" "had then said something very hushed and rushed in indecipherable French. “Forget it. Never mind.”"

what was this mysterious idea about ? 🤔😎

ahhh hi hello! yeah this chapter was a much needed breather from how intense the last few have been! "let the boys flirt" i yell at myself.

more animaig nonsense is on the table for next upload, i won't leave you hanging <3

as for sirius' mysterious idea. let's chat about what that was because while it's not obvious to remus what's going on in sirius' mind yet, it will be when we're back in sirius' POV. consider this a kinda mild spoiler!

let's start by going back to sirius deciding to have an order for how he hopes to approach the possibility of him and remus getting back together:

"I just have an order to do things in, and kissing doesn't come first."

sirius has decided that impulsivity and heat-of-the-moment actions aren't going to cut it this time. he'd like to approach getting back together with remus with patience and maturity and caution. a big problem remus had during their relationship was that sirius moved fast. he made fast choices and wanted a lot all at once and this freaked remus out. remember all the times remus said: "you're taking this too fast" or "you're running with this like a dog with a bone and it makes me nervous"?? sirius has listened to this feedback and values it--even if he's not consciously reviewing how their relationship really went just yet. the boys are both looking more internally and addressing their own personal problems before examining how they failed each other in the relationship the first time. but give that time, it's coming!

so, since sirius is choosing to approach the relationship a different way this time, he's considering doing something he's never felt the need/desire to do before. in fact, during the dog days chapters, he totally shat on the current way he'd like to approach their relationship:

“No,” Remus says, after a pause. “Lily told me once that there was a difference between…going on dates and dating. Can we…go on dates?”  Sirius snorts like a bull, now very angry indeed. “Right. Yeah. I’ll take you out to Madam Puddifoot's and snog you in public, shall I? So we can be the fucking fa…laughingstock. No thanks, Loony. No thanks.”  

so, let's go back to the start of that scene you pulled quotes from:

"But then, sometime in the middle of February, Remus limped in on Sirius pacing the dormitory, looking very distraught while reading one of Remus' old books on queerness."  [...] “I…” Sirius started and paused and started back up. He'd looked a little shifty. “I had an idea. I wanted to ask if you…”

we know sirius is a loverboy. he is squishy and sentimental and he enjoys the stupid theatrics of holidays. it was valentines day & he was going to ask remus on a date. just something small, like getting coffee or a drink or something but under the specific parameters of doing it as a date & not just mates. this is a very huge step for him because we know he reacted so poorly to remus suggesting dates all those months ago because of sirius' internalized homophobia, which he was still struggling with immensely at that point. he still struggles with it now, which was part of the reason he gave up and told remus to never mind. he got nervous and shy and the internalized homophobia bubbled up so he told remus to "go away" instead lol but still!!! baby steps!

mb this will give you a hint at where things might be going for them/where his mind is at

[zoemillinwrites]

do you ship prongsfoot?

nah they are not really my thing. i only enjoy reading stuff about that ship if it's unrequited love sort of thing

[zoemillinwrites]

when the ao3 author is funny in the chapter notes and i get lowkey parasocial

[zoemillinwrites]

Wolfstar Hogwarts era fic recs. This list was requested. (A lot of these extend into the war both divergent and non but hope that is ok)

Let me know what I missed including self recs. (I love getting y'all's self recs 💙)

~~~please give these authors love, comments and interaction means more than you know. ~~~

-The Standard Book Of Spells by Imparfait no voldy hogwarts au (this is one of my absolute favorite series!!!)

--Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations by @TheQueerTailor Sixth year has just started and Remus is barely keeping up. He's just sixteen but it feels like his body is falling apart.

--Tic Tic Boom by @fictionboysarebetter : Hogwarts fic, remus has tourettes (wip)

-The Ups and Downs of Inevitability by depressed_and_nauseous (check tags deals with heavy topics) remus is in Poppy's care for his safety (wip)

-The Shoebox Project: look back at Hogwarts years overall happy

-we grew up in spite of it by peachyybabe wip, remus has a twin, mcd

-Would That I by third_crow (wip) soulmates, canon divergent, no voldy, autistic remus

-Burning and Buried With the Rest of It by @kalegreeneyes Remus is bitten summer before 5th year, and how it affects friendships, and his mental health mind the tags!

-Of Initials and Postscripts (Hogwarts era, remus is homeschooled and sirius is his penpal) both by @irrationalmoony & LadyAmina

--from white-hot anticipation to cold-blooded fear and back again by @drowsyanddazed ravenclaw remus unimpressed by prank idea and they get close

-this is erosion by cruelrage : modern magical, texting at Hogwarts, remus homeschooled

-shifting Lines by dovahtobi (wip currently updating

-Befriending A Ravenclaw by @kreestars slow burn with pining. Remus is ravenclaw prefect

-summer you let your hair grow out By ladymemebeth : Sirius goes to remus instead of James'

- Heavy In Your Arms by @mollymarymarie : slytherin Sirius as padfoot finds injured ravenclaw remus and takes care of him

-Light in August by orestesfasting : summer at the Lupins

-Into the Fire by @wilteddaisy (taotu) triward tournament

-The Other Side of Sorrow by @thehufflebean Hogwarts divergent, Snape dies in prank

-shorn and scarred and yours by @lynxindisguise : Slytherin sirius, Hogwarts divergent

-Motion Sickness by oscarwildechilde : summer post prank. Lily and remus friendship

-if i could give you the moon by malecstsc fake dating, no voldy, Slytherin remus

-Scar-Crossed Lovers by Middleofamoment: soulmates

-Lie to Me (Another Secret) by Whoops_e

-Engaged for 43 years by @halfravenhalfclaw divergent first meeting to death (but they get to be old men)

-Snakes and Lions by @her-smile-forges-galaxies Slytherin remus, moonwater friendship focus. He's very morally gray.

-It takes a village by @kaymardsa fluff and snow burn

-sirius black and the "mystery girl" by anon

-Let Me Love You by anactualpirateship soulmates (scars)

-We are the Champions by @redadidassneakers Triwizard cup, different schools

-No Matter the Wreckage by @greyeyedmonster-18 5th year getting together

-Moony and Padfoot by linettisetgo: slow burn, moonflower friendship

-TransFigured [+podfic] by @picascribit ft trans remus

-we can be heroes by @blitheringmcgonagall long fic 💙

-I Want To Be Good @mightyd0lphin sirius pov unlearning things from family

-Do I Wanna Know? By @shadow_prince

-i've loved you in a million different ways by @dotty456 no voldy divergent

-We Were Infinite by tazmanic

-waterloo by frogsandfairies fake dating

-Wereapples by GreenIbis : wolfstar from several perspectives

•reddit rec post here

Jegulus main but wolfstar is heavily featured

-just lovers by bizarrestars: divergent fic, fake dating (wolfstar isn't main but )

- Only the Brave by Solmussa

-Choices by MesserMoon canon

New wolfstar addition:

•Brave Face by zoe_millin_writes @zoemillinwrites WIP multiple pov but Sirius is primary. It's so good

[zoemillinwrites]

brave face fulfilling all needs for ultimate loverboy sirius black truthers out there THANK YOU ZOE

[zoemillinwrites]

this last bf chapter brought me so many smiles and joy! you’re such a talented writer and i love your unique take on these characters so much!

thank you so much anon! they're starting to really settle into each other! remus is starting to feel comfortable enough in himself to experiment with standing his ground against sirius and tease sirius back! sirius isn't instantly lashing out after being Vulnerable On Main In Front Of Everyone.

i know not much actiony stuff happened in this chapter compared to the last few, but i wanted this chapter to feel like all those big action moments are starting to culminate into real change for how the characters actually treat each other<3

[zoemillinwrites]

“There’s Runes for James, see that’s a J on my thumbs. And an R for Reg and P for Pete and—er—I got the moon for you. And an S for me.” -I’m assuming this means Peter’s on his middle finger…if so I find this hilarious and very ironic

oh peter is very much on the middle finger heh this was very on purpose of me because i thought it was funny too 🤭

[zoemillinwrites]

Do you experience burn out when it comes to fic writing? If so, how do you cope with it? I can’t imagine being able to push out the amount of (high quality, might I add) content you do every week; it’s honestly incredible😭

hi anon!! yes, i totally experience burnout when it comes to fic writing. i'm actually quite burnt out on fic writing at the moment.

burnout for me manifests in a very specific way. i still want to write and i still will write--because i use writing as a tool to generally cope with my life--but when i'm burn out on writing i tend to hate everything i write and feel really frustrated with the pacing of what i write. i start to generally feel that everything i write is repetitive and that i'm losing control over the project. this is not a fun feeling. it's demotivating to feel this way.

to combat it, i do two things.

1- i try to give myself some space from the project. if i have two hours in the evening to write, I'll spend that time watching a movie instead to let my brain rest. movies are also very inspiring--you might get an idea that makes you want to write from watching a film :)

2 - i read new stuff i've never read before. that's it. i read fanfics that have been languishing in my TBR or i pick up a book at the shop I've been meaning to read etc etc. give your brain new toys to play with. i always find that eventually I'll read something that will spark an idea or give me fresh motivation to help me get back into the writing groove again

[zoemillinwrites]

I genuinely never quite know what to do with myself after a chapter drops. How can I go from BF to Netflix. I can't.

Thank you for the image of snow covered rosebushes And ice fishing on this too hot day. Even though I hate real January I enjoyed that one.

It might seem like all I can think about is the weather. It is. But the tally thing is kind of breaking my heart. Remus and his lists and his searches for solid proof in every situation is something I really identify with and I'm really looking forward to seeing where he gets to with it.

gosh, thank you so so much!! this is so so lovely to hear <3 i personally am very much enjoying this heatwave but there's something very cooling about all the wintery writing I've been doing for sure--glad i could help cool you down a bit today :)

remus and his lists!! :,) he's so baby