zorlaza

[zorlaza]

the kind of thing prowl is being sent on a daily basis

[zorlaza]

i turn my clamification dial to 100% & the capital of the netherlands becomes clamsterdam. i turn it to 200% & it becomes clamsterclam

[zorlaza]

I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"

[zorlaza]

Omega if he was in Sonic and the Black Knight (he'd be Galehaut btw)

[zorlaza]

since they’re on Earth, do the Transformers celebrate pride? Do they even know what LGBTQIA means?

Happy Pride :>

[zorlaza]

[zorlaza]

two nerds talking nerd scrap

[zorlaza]

i'm (finally) opening up prints for online order! i have a limited supply of each print so contact me as soon as you're able if interested. pa/y/p/al and v/en/mo are accepted methods of payment.

make sure to put "print order" in the subject of your email!

[zorlaza]

Commission for @ondaja of these fine fellows

[zorlaza]

I start with P and end with ORN what am I?

PRONGHORN

[zorlaza]

Playing smash at my dads house with my brother and my nephew (none of the characters are unlockedbon his switch yet). Played a bunch of rounds and were like ok it's finally bed time and then out of no where the olimar challenger appears and we all reached toward the screen and yelled OLIMAR!!!!!

[zorlaza]

american psycho if there was lunch

[zorlaza]

Juneteenth ❤️ Pride

[zorlaza]

give a man a candy, he will eat candy for a day. give a man a toy, and he will play for the rest of his life.

[zorlaza]

I know that some British people take umbrage at Americans calling the Great British Bake Off relaxing, but it's just because GBBO is such a different kind of stressful from American baking shows.

American baking shows will be called something like "Cupcake Knife Fight", there's horror movie lighting everywhere and dramatic stings every 5 seconds. All of the contestants are shit talking each other and fist fighting over the one single deep fryer provided by production. It will show the judges all whispering to each other at their super villain table overlooking the whole kitchen, and one will be like, "Oh my god. Everyone look at Brenda right now. She's straight tanking it." And it will cut to Brenda, who is running around covered in flour and crying and also bleeding for some reason. Then you get a clip from an interview with one of the contestants, and they're like, "I really need to win this. Without this award money, I'm gonna need to close my restaurant, sell my dad, and live out of my car. AGAIN." Then the giant digital doomsday clock overhead lets out a horrid klaxon, the judges tell half of them that their cupcakes taste disgusting, and one of them gets eliminated and sent to walk down the dramatically-lit shame hallway never to be seen again.

Meanwhile GBBO is in a lovely, brightly colored tent, there are delightful and friendly hosts/jesters there to keep everyone entertained, and all of the B Roll is of like... a bumblebee going into a flower, or a lamb running in a field. And yes, there will be moments where someone will mess up their timing or something, and they'll be looking at their bake through the oven door like, "oh gosh I don't think this will rise in time!" Then they stand up to find Paul Hollywood directly behind them ominously. His creepy whitewalker eyes will glow white, and he'll say something like "the 12th of June. 2035. Drowning." And his eyes will go back to normal and he'll walk away. Then the baker gives a playful grimace to the camera and says "that didnt sound great, did it?". Cut to a sweet looking older woman sipping tea on a stool and she says "oo I do hope that Prue enjoys the taste of my sugary, sticky baps!". Then, at the end, someone gets a gold star for doing good, and the loser of the episode gets in the middle of a giant group hug. You see all of them at the end of the series at a giant carnival with their families and the post credits informs you that all of the contestants have become a Partridge Family-style traveling band and stayed friends forever.

[zorlaza]

guess who baked cookies yesterday

[zorlaza]

dont stand between a man and his toys