coffee-with-my-shadows

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Absolutely adorable 😍

Apple and blueberry!!

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https://www.cameo.com/recipient/68544d3da89fff124f4a1265

Hi! I don’t think my first post with the full video sent lol so! This was my very first cameo and I’m so happy I chose Noshir for it :) for context I asked about Charles and romantic relationships. Noshir was so kind and poignant in his response and made me incredibly happy! Thank you again, @noshirdalal !

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So beautiful! 😍

Charthur fans I finished it :)

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a feel like the new generation of fanfic readers NEED to understand that clicking on a fic (interaction) does nothing. ao3 has no algorithm. your private discord discussions of fic do not reach the authors. if you do not actively engage with writers they will stop posting. this isn’t social media this is community.

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starting a collection of my favourite AO3 author’s notes

honourable mentions

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Cameo Prompt: How would it go if Lenny and Sean tried to talk Charles into teaching them how to use the bow and arrow?

From @noshirdalal, Charles Smith's voice actor. If you haven't checked out his cameo yet, please do! I've also got a running doc with links to and transcripts of Charles Smith-centric responses publicly available here.

Some highlights:

(On teaching Lenny to shoot)

All that to say, I think, um. Well first of all I think Charles would have patience in spades for Lenny(...) I can see Lenny asking really, really insightful questions and Charles being impressed and really enjoying teaching him. 

(on Charles and Lenny's relationship)

"Yeah, man. I don’t know why I made the decision that Charles cared so much about Lenny but even when—spoilers, for folks, if you watch this—when Lenny dies—which, because I had no lines, I did not know, I didn’t get a script so I didn’t know that that’s what happens in that moment—that really upset me. Both as Noshir the actor and as Charles(...) And, uh. I’m assuming it's still in the game—I hope it is—you’ll see Charles pause and then turn to check on Lenny before he keeps moving.  And if I’m not mistaken I actually got yelled at for it, because you know the animation team was like ‘no, the whole thing is that there’s chaos. Lenny goes down, the team has to move’. And I was told to do it again and not stop, and I did it.  I stopped again because I felt it was really important. Like Charles would never leave Lenny alone on a rooftop and not make sure he was dead.  That was really important to me. 

(on Charles' relationship with Sean)

I don’t say this often and I’m not sure I know the reason—I might explore it in just talking about it. I did not like Sean as Charles(...)Because he’s volatile. You just never know what he’s gonna do and I fucking hated that.  Because an element like that means you never know when your peace is gonna be disrupted(...) What I love about Mick Mellamphy is that Mick brought a real wild card danger to Sean. I don’t know how much of it came across in the game. He’s got an affable nature and like he’s easy to love but man when he turns he turns on a fucking dime.  And I remember in that moment as Sean kinda bared his teeth at Arthur, I reach back and just rested my hand on the butt of the shotgun, ‘cause I was gonna take Sean out. And then I think Mick has this wonderful turn where he holds attention and then he’s like ‘ah, I’m just kidding’ and kinda walks off.  And I’m like, as Charles, just like [releases breath]. And I watched Mick strut off and I just remember thinking, like, ‘I’ve gotta watch that motherfucker’.  Because Arthur was gonna give him too much grace. Just enough rope to get ‘em both hanged, you know. 

(on teaching Sean archery)

All that to say, if Charles for some insane reason decided to take Sean out into the woods and teach him how to use a bow and arrow. I think Sean would test Charles’ patience in a crazy way. ‘Cause Sean’s gonna joke and gab and you know be completely disrespectful of a thing that for Charles is not just a way of life but is hallowed, you know, is sacred. And I can totally see Charles, like giving Sean a thump and just stalking off—if he felt he could turn his back on Sean, I guess it would have to depend on how he left the situation. If Sean was laughing he’d be fine stalking away. If Sean got serious— I don’t know. Maybe only one of us walks out of there.

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The largest mass shooting in American history was a hate crime against gay people. Don’t ever forget that.

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Hating specific ships as a multishipper is so funny. It's like: "I'm cool with most ships. Except that one. It knows what it did."

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for your consideration:

Charles and Arthur attempting to hunt ‘perfect’ critters for Pearson to get some pouches

they make it into a competition because of course

Arthur SOAKS himself in cover-scent, fully does not comprehend the concept of just staying upwind

they accidentally shoot the same perfect beaver one time and fight about it so hard that they don’t speak for a day

squirrels are their common enemy. little shits move too fast

they have to paddle out to the island together for green iguanas and they get so snippy Charles almost capsizes the boat on purpose

they’re up in New Hanover hunting muskrats for the third day in a row when Arthur takes his shirt off to go check a den along the creek

Charles stares at him for a solid five minutes and then is just like

oooooooooh that’s why his heart rate’s been up for a week

Arthur slogs back to shore (den was empty) and Charles tackles him onto the grassy bank to make out with him

by the time they get back to camp they’re out of boar grease, ginseng oil, pomade, and gun oil

NEITHER of them are able to sit right in the saddle

they look so happy riding in Sean spreads the rumor they didn't go hunting at all and just spent a week at the local cat house

they didn’t get the rest of the pelts

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I've got a lot of respect for smut writers. you write something incredibly sexual, it's probably somewhat of a look into your own soul, and then bitches are too scared to leave kudos of comments half the time, so it looks as though everyone hates your work. And yet yall still do it, and I love that

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Noshir Dalal's (Charles Smith's VA and the man who largely shaped Charles into the singular character that he is, found here on tumblr @noshirdalal and on Cameo [in case you have your own questions you'd like answered]) beautiful response to my cameo prompt:

Q: You’ve mentioned before that Charles likes to read. What is his favorite book? Also, you’ve talked some about cowboy poetry and how you think it’s something Charles might have connected to. Can we get a favorite poem of his in his voice?

Besides the fact that this reading of "The Men That Don't Fit In" was just plain fantastic and moving as all get out, I really admire Noshir's choice of poem.

Similar to the poem’s author and his simultaneous celebration and castigation of the prototypical outlaw, Charles always came off to me as someone who loves his fellow gang members deeply but who didn't share their illusions about themselves or how they function within the larger context of the world around them.

Charles makes several remarks throughout the game ('Unpleasant? How do you rob and kill people pleasantly?' 'All this death and for what? Just so we can have enough money to be able to run from what we've done?' 'The amount of hell we raised, we’re owed some back') that indicate a high level of self-awareness about what it is the gang ACTUALLY does and how they're perceived by the outside world. 

Arthur makes some gestures at this understanding throughout the game, but his moral musings are undercut by his inability to stand his ground against Dutch throughout the numerous acts of outright cruelty his found-father perpetuates in Chapters 4-6 (Arthur barks, but he never bites).

Arthur and John have their gripes and moans, but ultimately the two of them stick it out until the bloody end. Charles is the first person to really break free of the fate the gang is hurtling towards.

In a tragedy built on the back of it's main cast's inability to cope with a changing world, Charles is arguably the character who exerts the most agency. He makes the decision in Chapter 6--when the circumstances that once tied him to the gang have dramatically altered--to cut loose.

Because of this choice, he lives.

To me, at least, this poem--and Noshir's brilliant delivery--isn't about Charles himself. Or at least not just about himself.

Its him talking about the Van der Linde gang. Arthur and John, his second family. Wild, brilliant, bold, true, free--and gone. With nothing but graves to show for the lives they lived.

Charles isn't reciting a poem--he's reciting a eulogy.

Transcript:

Hey Rocks. Um, thank you for your patience with all of this. 

Yeah, so we know that Charles reads and I know that we’ve talked before about a scene that apparently didn’t make it into the game, where after Charles’ interaction with Micah—and you know, yeeting him across the camp—Arthur comes upon him reading a book. 

That uh, that scene affected me in a major way and I think it's probably the reason I portray Charles the way I do. 

A guy who can physically manhandle pretty much anyone at camp having the mental and emotional maturity and self-regulation—if you can’t tell I’m a new dad [laughs]—to find a way to deal with his anger that doesn’t involve acting out and breaking stuff? 

Told me a tremendous amount about Charles, especially because what I’d been introduced to was the idea that Charles was a really violent, really angry maniac. 

And I love the idea that he’s really into poetry. I like poetry a lot. Actually when I was working on that latest skin for Yone (spl?) for League of Legends, I learned from the writing team that cowboy poetry is, like, a thing. 

And so I decided to look some up. And I like to think that maybe that this is a poem that Charles would have had in that book he was reading. 

The poem is called “The Men That Don’t Fit In” by Robert W. Service. Fitting, I think, especially for Charles for a number of reasons. I hope you like it. 

[Noshir goes into Charles’ voice and recites below poem by Robert W. Service (British-born Canadian Poet, 1874-1958), published in his book Songs of the Yukon (1907)]

There’s a race of men that don’t fit in, A race that can’t stay still; So they break the hearts of kith and kin, And they roam the world at will. They range the field and they rove the flood, And they climb the mountain’s crest; Theirs is the curse of the gypsy blood, And they don’t know how to rest. If they just went straight they might go far; They are strong and brave and true; But they’re always tired of the things that are, And they want the strange and new. They say: “Could I find my proper groove, What a deep mark I would make!” So they chop and change, and each fresh move Is only a fresh mistake. And each forgets, as he strips and runs With a brilliant, fitful pace, It’s the steady, quiet, plodding ones Who win in the lifelong race. And each forgets that his youth has fled, Forgets that his prime is past, Till he stands one day, with a hope that’s dead, In the glare of the truth at last. He has failed, he has failed; he has missed his chance; He has just done things by half. Life’s been a jolly good joke on him, And now is the time to laugh. Ha, ha! He is one of the Legion Lost; He was never meant to win; He’s a rolling stone, and it’s bred in the bone; He’s a man who won’t fit in.

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TW: Harassment, Fear, Panic, Nightmares, Trauma

I highly recommend caution when reading this. I have tagged it to the best of my ability, and hope it is enough.

This poem speaks heavily of physical harassment, and reactions to that. It can be read as r*pe, although it is not explicitly stated.

It explores the feeling of powerlessness many feel in the aftermath of any form of harassment to their person.

_Powerless_

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Hi, I'm Coffee-with-my-Shadows (Or just CoffeeS is fine).

IMPORTANT NOTE BELOW!!

Much of my content is Dark in nature, and may feature heavier themes like depression, ptsd, unreality, anxiety, etc.

I will tag all my posts to the best of my ability. As well as write a small summary of possible triggers and themes at the top of each post. Please don't hesitate to tell me if I miss any tags or warnings! The last thing I want is to accidentally harm someone by not filtering my content.

I struggle with several disorders myself, and most of my poems are written in depressive and/or manic periods.

___________

With that said,

Expect irregular posting of Just Thoughts, in the form of poetry, unfinished snippets, quotes, and maybe the occasional drawing or such 🩷

As always, take care of yourselves! Stay hydrated, hug a plushie or your cat if you have one 🩷

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TW: Self-harm, trauma, mental illness.

This is Dark poetry, and does reference reactions to trauma. Can be read as hallucination, unreality, or any sort of disconnect with reality. Self-harm is very much a theme, even if it isn't very explicitly described.

Bleeding Wounds

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Prompt List: Favs Masterlist

SMUT

Smut | Fluff Dialogue + Kink Prompts By: AllOverOliver

Smut Dialogue Prompts By: a-cure-for-writers-block

100 Smut Dialogue Prompts By: a-cure-for-writers-block

Vanilla + Romance + Goofy Smut Dialogue Prompts By: anotheropti

Smut Dialogue Prompts By: prolixitae

30 top/dom Smut Dialogue Prompts By: lankylevi  

Smut Dialogue Prompts By: justforshitsandcackles

Smut Dialogue Prompts By: nautiscarader

Smut Dialogue Prompts By: lisinfleur/ ewlbow

Smut Dialogue Prompts By: nebulous-leo

Smut Dialogue Prompts By: pjhasasideblog 

Smut Dialogue Prompts By: fayesfairylights

100 Smut Dialogue Prompts By: palettes-and-prompts

Smut Dialogue Prompts By: leneemusing 

AU 

Vampire AU Smut Dialogue Prompts By: AllOverOliver

A-Z AU prompt list By: alternateuniverseotp

AU + Troupes Prompt List By: tveckling

OTHER fun fluffy Prompt lists

Enemies turned Lovers Dialogue Prompts List By: wordsnstuffblog

Alice in Wonderland (1951) Dialogue Prompts List By: rpsentence-storage

Kiss Prompts By: blog-of-a-multitude-of-fandoms