hisfirstmate

[hisfirstmate]

How to Cure Acne with Celery Juice

How to Cure Acne with Celery Juice

For all of my teenage and adult life, I have had acne. Got my period? Acne. Ate an extra slice of pizza? Acne. Rested my head in my hand during class without thinking? Acne all over my chin and jaw. Forgot to wash my face before bed? A nose full of blackheads and…you guessed it…acne. It definitely hit my confidence and still does. There’s nothing like a huge, red bump front and center on your…

[hisfirstmate]

How to Start Your Own Blog

How to Start Your Own Blog

I feel like this is such a cliché topic to write about but how I created this blog is something I get asked ALL the time. My desire to create a blog started one day while I was attending a class at my college in the South Loop of Chicago. I went to school for journalism and already had a fascination for words and writing but the need to have a blog came when we had a guest speaker come to one of…

[hisfirstmate]

I am currently writing on the patio of our new apartment with the newest addition to our family chewing my big toe. It has been a long year since I’ve moved to Washington state and I have just now started to find the time to write and tap into my creativity again. In the past year, the bar I work at shut down for a few months and then re-opened, we moved into our own apartment, I started taking clients for personal training and also became a certified nutrition specialist. But I am back, as balanced as I can be and happy to start creating again. In the midst of all of that, we also adopted Dougie, our golden retriever fur child, who has been a handful himself.

 The best way I could think of to come back is to introduce you all to this feisty little ball of fur. He has completely stolen my heart and I am absolutely OBSESSED with being a dog mom…like “crying at the animal store checkout counter while signing him up for puppy classes because he’s ‘growing up too fast'” obsessed.

And with this face how could I not be absolutely in love.

  Dougie was born on a family farm in Tacoma, Washington. Taylor has been dreaming of owning this specific type of golden retriever so I put aside my “adopt, don’t shop” attitude for just this once and went along. When the puppies came of age, we went to visit and pick out the one we wanted. A little spot of hair was shaved on each of the puppy’s bellies so that both the farmers and you knew which one was yours.

We sat down in a grassy field while the farmer’s wife let the puppies loose out of a white fence play pen and one puppy sat right in my lap and rested his head on my arm. That was it. I was in love. No need to look any further! I lifted his belly, found that he had a little patch shaved on the upper left side and passed him to Taylor in hopes he might fall in love too.

Taylor is definitely the realist in the relationship and liked the pup but wanted to give the others a chance too. We tried to play and hold other puppies but “upper left” just kept coming back, we’d put him down, he’d come back and the process just repeated itself over and over.

After a few cycles, upper left was laying in Taylor’s arms and I finally said, “We came here to choose Dougie but I think Dougie chose us.”

A few weeks later, we took “upper left” home and he has been our baby ever since.

  My writing always centers around my passions so here’s to introducing my latest, furry topic of discussion. Settle in and get ready for a lot more adventures, wellness, military relationship successes and woes and a lot more Dougie.

      I Am Finally Back and Have Brought a New, Slobbering, Furry Addition With Me I am currently writing on the patio of our new apartment with the newest addition to our family chewing my big toe.

[hisfirstmate]

Two months ago, I packed my entire life up into my Honda Civic and drove across the country to finally close this damn distance between Taylor and I. I insisted to my mom, who came along for the ride so I wouldn’t get mugged or kidnapped, that I wanted to drive the entire way. I savored every mile that got me closer to him.

Eating Doughnuts in Denver, CO

I want to tell you that my road trip and these past two months have been nothing but amazing and a breeze…but that’s not what I started this blog for. The truth is that these past two months have been beautiful and wonderful and I’ve been living my best life but it has also been a constant rollercoaster.

  I’ve said a million goodbyes. I’ve cried. Me and Taylor have always known what our relationship looked like long distance but now we had to figure what it looked like in the same household. I had three panic attacks during our road trip here. My car broke down in Boise, Idaho. I rejected jobs and accepted them and then, today, I lost my current job because the owner got incredibly sick and the pub shut down. I’ve made new friendships. I had to find where my new favorite grocery store and coffee shop are. I went to IKEA, bought a new nightstand, went home to build it and completely screwed the entire thing up and Taylor had to drill new holes into it so we could fix it. I go to bed to the sound of sea lions going, “AR,AR,AR” in the bay.  I’ve learned what it is like to not spend Thanksgiving with your family. I rarely used to call my mom and dad because we lived together and now you can catch me cell phone in hand any time something slightly inconveniences my life. Getting a new driver’s license, plates and car insurance has been a two-month process that I am still not done with. I’ve laughed until I cried. I learned how to make sweet potato casserole.

It. has. been. a. process.

And even if it hasn’t been the easiest process, it has been 100%, hands down worth every second. I’m not only saying that because it has, so far, worked out for Taylor and I. Even if I got here and it didn’t work out between us and I had to pack my stuff back into my Civic and go home to Chicago, it would have still been worth it. I’ve experienced a side of life I would have never known if I didn’t leave Illinois.  Our relationship would have been stuck where it has always been if I didn’t decide to close the distance.

My advice is to go for it. Close the distance. Move to a new state. Move to a new country. Find a new job. There will never be a perfect or opportune time for you to pack up your life and go. Life doesn’t pause or wait for anybody.

Build a life you love and if it doesn’t turn out to be what you thought, then start from the bottom and try again.

    What Closing the Distance and Moving to a New State Has Taught Me Thus Far Two months ago, I packed my entire life up into my Honda Civic and drove across the country to finally close this damn distance between Taylor and I.

[hisfirstmate]

Closing the Distance: How to Start Your Move Two Months Ahead Freaking out is an understatement. I am officially two months out from picking up my entire life, moving it across the country and I am a complete melting pot of emotion.

[hisfirstmate]

To be honest, I mostly do these posts for my future self. I’ve always treated this site like a journal, in a sense, so I can look back years from now and see my own growth as well… and I tend to wash my phone in the washing machine and drop it in the toilet a lot so this is also my way of preserving pictures!

Anyway… maybe about a year ago, me and Taylor were talking about Disney and he had learned that I had never been to any Disney parks or resorts…ever… which in his eyes was absolutely ridiculous so we started making plans to go. Taylor’s leave got moved around and we ended up not going.

Fast forward to after deployment and Taylor tells me we are going on a surprise vacation and as you could probably guess I, finally, after 24 years on this earth, got to go to Disney.

And let me tell you, Disney had the best food.

Taylor got one hole-in-one…and then ate it the entire rest of the game.

Before the storm and after the storm…

These are, hands down, Taylor’s favorite pictures that we took.

Everyone always says how magical of a place Disney is and I never really got it. I mean, how could a theme park really feel “magical” if it is just a theme park? Disney truly was one of the greatest vacations I have ever taken. I stepped out of my comfort zone and rode roller coaters. I laughed until I cried. I soaked up the Florida sun. I ate amazing food. I was reminded of all the things that made me happy and hopeful as a kid. And I did it all with my best friend.

  Our First Disney Trip…In Pictures To be honest, I mostly do these posts for my future self. I've always treated this site like a journal, in a sense, so I can look back years from now and see my own growth as well...

[hisfirstmate]

Two Simple Rules for Your Sub Ball/Navy Ball Dress

Two Simple Rules for Your Sub Ball/Navy Ball Dress

Dress shopping for Sub Ball was so stressful and, when I look back on it, it really didn’t have to be. I spent hours looking through my military girlfriend Facebook groups for advice and I signed out feeling more confused than when I first logged in.

(more…)

[hisfirstmate]

How to Stay Fit When Traveling to Disney World...Or Traveling in General

How to Stay Fit When Traveling to Disney World…Or Traveling in General

Twenty-four years old and I had never been to Disney World…

I know.

My parents aren’t big travelers and they also aren’t big theme park people so I never really thought going to Disney World was a possibility for me as of now.

Enter Taylor.

(more…)

[hisfirstmate]

After Three Years, We Are Finally Closing The Distance

After Three Years, We Are Finally Closing The Distance

September 15th.

That’s the date I want to finally close the gap between me and Taylor.

(more…)

[hisfirstmate]

Vegetarian, Part Time Vegan: I do not eat meat including seafood. For the most part, dairy and all animal products are out of my diet and my beauty care but I will still mindfully consume it in small amounts from time to time.

It all started with my acne. I am 24 years old, almost 25 and I still had at least three huge pimples on my face on any given day. I had so many large blackheads on my nose that they started to look more like dark freckles. When I was younger, I thought that acne was just a puberty thing and that it would subside when I was 21 and surely when I turned 25. Not the case.

So, I upped my skin care routine and my face cleared a bit but I still wasn’t fully satisfied. A few months ago, I did an experiment where I tried my best (again, no where near perfect) to be vegan for an entire month and I remembered my skin clearing up a bit during that point too. Maybe if I paired my new skin care routine with being vegetarian/part-time vegan I could finally have the skin I wanted.

And so my journey began. Ironically, when I logged into Netflix that night a few new documentaries were in my suggestions list including “Cowspiracy”, “Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead” and “What the Health” which are all beautifully written, well-done documentaries about the meat and dairy industries. Seriously, the journalism in my blood was pumping at rapid rates from watching these…

What started with acne now turned it something a little more…

1. An animal is an animal, the only difference is your perception

I binged watched these documentaries on my couch one morning while drinking some coffee. Half way through one of them, my dog trotted down the stairs and stood in front of the tv and stared at me, ears perked and eyes intent. This is something he often does when he is ready to go for our usual morning walk. I looked at him. He looked at me. I looked back to the TV screen where a cow was grazing in a field. I looked back at him.

I wouldn’t ever eat my dog. Ever. The fact that some countries have dog meat markets has always horrified me…but how was that any different from eating a pig, cow or chicken? An animal is an animal. The corpse on my plate was a corpse no matter what kind of animal it used to be.

I wanted to puke.

There is a particularly powerful scene in “Cowspiracy” where you watch a duck’s head get chopped off and I seriously couldn’t do it. I closed my eyes but then I could hear it happening so instead I just skipped past it. I couldn’t even watch a duck be slaughtered let alone a cow or pig and I definitely couldn’t do it myself. So, why was I having others do it for me?

Seeing the duck reminded me of another wonderful documentary series called “Huang’s World” which is about a man who travels globally to explore different cultures and foods. Normally, I love watching and learning about other cultures but I remember one particularly painful episode a few years ago where a few men brutally slaughtered this poor goat who was crying and struggling until they hacked his head off.

A cheeseburger suddenly didn’t seem so appealing anymore…

2. I feel a closer connection to the environment

If you asked my mother, she would tell you what a terror I am about recycling. I will, no lie, go digging through my family’s garbage to pull out things that can be put into the recycling bin instead. When me and my dog go for walks, I will come home with stray pop cans and other garbage that I scrapped up to throw in the recycling bin.

Since I have bought my car, it has never been taken off of  “eco” mode. My showers are much shorter than they used to be. I turn off the water when brushing my teeth. I stopped using straws. I cut through the plastic pop can holders before recycling them.

And these are all wonderful things… but the other morning I walked outside with my dog and for the first time,  I felt this unbelievable sensation of being connected to the earth and all of it’s life.

  Freaking out when I got to pet a deer at Magnolia Plantation in South Carolina

  And I guess I could sit here and list off facts and articles and websites about how animal agriculture is destroying the earth but the one thing I did not find on the internet was what it felt like to not be a contributing number to those statistics anymore, at least not a major contributor.

Let me tell you, it was incredibly moving and empowering.

3. My own health is worth it

Right next to cigarette smoking, processed meat is classified as a carcinogen, something that is likely to cause cancer in humans, as stated in this article by the American Cancer Society.

Yeah, no thanks.

Besides actively avoiding cancer, my skin has cleared up a little bit more. I have taken three boxing classes since  and each time I have been impressed by how much more I could do without being exhausted. I haven’t had the need to drink coffee in over a week to stay awake and get through the day. Instead, I can drink it because I want to and because I enjoy the taste.

Maybe the most surprising thing that happened took place in my left foot. Typically, I have bad inflammation in my big toe’s joint and some days it hurt to walk. Since changing over, my foot does not hurt nearly as bad as it once did. I can do mountain  climbers, pushups with both feet on the ground instead of one-legged pushups and most importantly I haven’t had any pain with walking. It’s not cured. I still feel a bit of discomfort but it’s not what it used to be.

  Making the choice to go vegetarian with a strong effort to be vegan was a hard choice. At first I looked at it as I was losing something or restricting myself and now it’s become this whole new adventure and appreciation for life in general. I’ve been exposed to new foods, new beauty products, new feelings in my body that I didn’t really know I could feel.

My body suddenly became less of a tomb and more of a beautiful, lush garden.

    Check out my pinterest for vegan recipes: https://www.pinterest.com/hisfirstmate1/vegan-meals/

              Why I Became a Vegetarian, Part-Time Vegan Vegetarian, Part Time Vegan: I do not eat meat including seafood. For the most part, dairy and all animal products are out of my diet and my beauty care but I will still mindfully consume it in small amounts from time to time.

[hisfirstmate]

Simple Mixed Berry Smoothie Bowl Recipe

Simple Mixed Berry Smoothie Bowl Recipe

The smoothie bowl craze has been a thing for a while now and for the longest time they just didn’t look appealing to me. I didn’t think there was much of a difference between drinking a smoothie and putting it in a bowl to eat with toppings and a spoon…

Enter my recent trip to Oahu, Hawaii where I had my first smoothie bowl and became obsessed. After coming home I went on a mission to try and…

[hisfirstmate]

Deployment is… a whole mess of emotions that I don’t even have a word for. It was like going through puberty, it was like I was dating a ghost, the beginning, middle and end all had totally different vibes to them.

Going through deployment is kind of like going through puberty.

It’s awkward, it’s unfamiliar, you spend your days just trying to figure it out, you have good days and you have bad ones but overall it’s a horrible time. Once it’s all over, however, you realize how much you and your relationship with your SO has grown. As much as it sucked, I truly feel like it made our relationship stronger and gave each of us a new appreciation and a new kind of love for the other.

Going through deployment is also like having a relationship with a ghost.

All through deployment, I was living my own life but something always felt…like it was missing. Even on my best days, something always felt off and it was a feeling I could never shake.

My therapist once told me that deployment is similar to grieving the loss of a loved one and that made total sense for me. I felt like I did lose him and the first few months were all about me “grieving” that loss. I took it one step further to say it’s like dating a ghost. I couldn’t touch, see or hear him but I could still feel that he had presence in my life. And as stupid as it may sound, getting emails or phone calls were like signs from “beyond” that confirmed he was still apart of my life even if he wasn’t physically here.

I went through different stages during deployment for both the grieving and puberty parts of it…

The Beginning:

Ugh. The beginning was honestly the worst. I had more trouble than usual getting back to normal life after I came home from seeing him deploy. I was upset. I was mad. I was angry. Six months from then seemed light years away. I had no idea how the hell I was about to do this and I was terrified on how our relationship would hold on. Each day was a rollercoaster of me being okay to all of a sudden me not being okay. Forget day by day, I had to take things hour by hour.

The Middle:

This was my acceptance stage. Maybe a little before we were halfway through I started to find my groove and there wasn’t so much ambiguity as to what our “deployment” relationship would look like. I still had good and bad days and something always felt missing but my lows weren’t quite as low anymore. I started to take things day by day at this point.

When he left…

When he came home.

The End:

About two months to the end was when I finally realized that this was close to coming to an end. It dragged and went by quickly all at once. My days were painfully slow but overall the time flew. The highs were really high and my lows weren’t all too bad. I spent my time planning my trip to go see him and picking up as many shifts as I can to afford it. The end was finally in sight.

Deployment seems like a daunting task when you look at it as a whole. It had it’s good and bad days and going through it seemed slow. Looking back, though, I feel like it flew. Deployment was a growing experience for me, T and our relationship together and only for the better.

Deployment Diaries: What is a Deployment Like? Deployment is... a whole mess of emotions that I don't even have a word for. It was like going through puberty, it was like I was dating a ghost, the beginning, middle and end all had totally different vibes to them.

[hisfirstmate]

Oahu is like no where I have ever been before. So much history, culture and a completely different atmosphere gave me a great life experience that I don’t think I could ever get anywhere else. It’s a place that you could look at pictures of all day but there is nothing like the actual experience of being in Oahu.

I have visited Oahu on two separate occasions and compiled a list of my favorite things I saw and did…

1.Pearl Harbor I have goosebumps and I haven’t even started telling you about Pearl Harbor. Before even going to the memorial, there is a short film that everyone watches in a dark theatre. The film really puts into perspective what happened, why it happened, how it happened and what it looked, smelled, sounded and felt like to be there.

The film ends on a solemn note of remembrance and then you walk out to a boat which takes you across the harbor to the bright, white memorial. It’s quiet when you step out of the boat minus the sounds of the water softly slapping against whatever parts of the Arizona still stick up out of the water. The memorial itself acts like a bridge over the boat so you are able to walk around and view both sides as well as see the wall with all the names of the deceased. Oil still leaks from the ship giving the water a rainbow tint. Sometimes a fish will swim by. It’s peaceful with unconditional remembrance and a hint of grief, the perfect burial ground for those who still lie under.

2. Lanikai Beach Of all the beaches I have been to in Hawaii, Lanikai will always be my favorite. Crystal clear waters, beautiful views, not too crowded, it’s exactly what I imagine when I think of Hawaii.

3. Drive on Pali Highway If you are looking for scenery, a drive down Pali Highway is the way to go. Lots of Fog but also lots of lookouts and views to be enjoyed as well.

4.  KoKo Crater Trail Koko Crater was…definitely not what I expected. I was hunting around online for cool trails to hike and came across this one site talking about an old abandoned railway that used to carry supplies up an old crater to a military bunker during World War 2…Koko Crater Trail. The railway has 1,078 rails to climb up to get to the top where amazing views and an old bunker await. In my head, this was going to be just like doing the stair master at the gym.

My God was I wrong. I guess I didn’t really take the “abandoned” part as seriously as I should have. The rails are crumbling, old and uneven. You really have to think about where you are stepping which was a great distraction from the 1,078 steps but also a little terrifying. About halfway up, the ground disappears from beneath the rails, there’s nothing around to grab onto and you realize that one wrong move and that’s it. Now mind you, there were people just jogging up these without a second thought but for someone afraid of heights it was quite the adrenaline rush. (On the way down, I recommend sliding on your butt!) Thirty to Forty more steps up the ground reappears but the trail gets steeper. And then you make it to the top and…

Worth it.

5. Diamond Head If Koko Crater sounds too terrifying you can also opt for Diamond Head, a very user friendly trail. While still a good workout, the trail is a little uneven but manageable and there are rails to save you should you slip. A good dose of stairs, an underground tunnel through the mountain and lots of walking with a slight incline will still get your heart pumping. And let’s face it, the view is still pretty amazing.

6. North Shore and Halewai Bowls You have never had an acai bowl until you go to Halewai’s Bowls in North Shore. Seriously. So. Good. It’s a cute, tiny shack that people walk up, order and sit on little benches off to the side to eat and enjoy the ocean breezes.

After scarfing down a bowl, there are a bunch of little “surfer” boutique shops full of Hawaiian trinkets and knick-knacks. This area is also a good spot to surf or watch people surf while lounging on the beach.

7. Makapu’u Lighthouse Trail

Another trail that is paved and easy to walk and navigate! This one has an actual paved road (still a good incline!) that takes you to the top where people claim to see whales in the ocean at certain times of the year. Personally, I did not see any but there is also a lovely little lighthouse to look at among other amazing views of the ocean.

At the start of the trail, there is a little divide in the road. One path is paved and takes you up, the other path is made of rocks and takes you down towards the ocean. I highly recommend also walking the path towards the ocean as that has lovely views as well and also some nice shades places to sit! Bring a bathing suit and towel to enjoy some of the tide pools there too!

8. Dole Plantation The Dole Plantation itself is alright but the Dole Whip is what you want to go for. It’s a pineapple sorbet and ice cream mix that you can add a vast array of toppings to. They also have an amazing shop in the front full of candy, snacks, t-shirts, etc.

    Top Eight Favorite Things To Do In Oahu, Hawaii Oahu is like no where I have ever been before. So much history, culture and a completely different atmosphere gave me a great life experience that I don't think I could ever get anywhere else.

[hisfirstmate]

The Biggest Realization I Needed To Have Before Truly Loving My Body

What is it that you see when you look in a mirror? What do you look at first?

Typically, we go for flaws. The roll of back fat, the tummy pooch, the acne, the flat butt, whatever you deem to be imperfect about yourself or whatever you feel society deems to be imperfect.

But when was the last time you looked in a mirror and really, truly thanked your body? The human body does so many brilliant…

[hisfirstmate]

Deployment Diaries: What to Send in a Care Package After T deployed, care packaging got a little more serious. The things I was sending before were, in all honesty, more for my enjoyment than his.

[hisfirstmate]

Ask His First Mate: What Do You Do When You Feel Insecure About Your Relationship?

(more…)

[hisfirstmate]

Don't Just Make a New Year's Resolution, Make a New Year's Plan

Don’t Just Make a New Year’s Resolution, Make a New Year’s Plan

Wanting to better yourself is a beautiful thing. Everyone can use some self improvement and the  New Year is always good motivation to move forward with it. However, you will set yourself up for failure, or at least make success more challenging, if you don’t have a plan to go along with your aspirations.

Let’s say that you want to quit smoking, for example. It’s a great thought but it has no…