#//okay i need to stop think about frogs. with hats

[keeps-ache]

so like over a month ago i got this mousse cup from the store and was looking forward to it. put it in the fridge, aand Immediately forgot about it for like a week and a half until i was having a bad day and was like 'oh i have that mousse when i get home at least!!'. got home, ransacked the fridge, my mousse. Gone. my mouuuusse

anyway still haunted by that 👍

[frogsinflannel]

I'm fascinated by the froggy story, more please 🥺

🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸

Ahh, I'm so glad people are enjoying it! That's honestly lovely to hear lmao, and I'm always happy to write more. Here's a quick snippet!

[ first | second | third | fourth | fifth | this part ]

this is still untitled btw

Mara huffs, crossing her arms over her chest.

Karen turns to look at her.  “Hey,” she says, laying a gentle hand on Mara’s arm.  “Sweetheart?  Is something wrong?”

For a moment Mara stares over at where the rest of the group was gathered.  Then she sighs and looks up at Karen.  “Everyone’s being so silly,” she says.

“Oh?”  Karen hums thoughtfully.  “What do you mean?”

Mara points with a stiff arm over at Buck’s frog tank.  “The frog,” she says.  “Buck thinks it’s his boyfriend, right?”

“Well.  Ex-boyfriend, but yes.”

“And now Jee does, too.  I know none of the grown-ups believe him.”

Karen presses her lips together for a moment.  “It’s not that we don’t trust, Buck, sweetie.  We do.  But it’s not possible for anyone to turn into a frog, boyfriend or not.  That would be magic, not science.  And that’s not real.”

“Okay,” Mara says.  She rolls her eyes and Karen blinks, a little taken aback but still charmed by how indignant she is about the entire frog situation.  “But you always say that for science, you need evidence.  You need a hypothesis and then you can test it.”

“That’s true…  But.  Where are you going with that, Mara?”

She points again over at Buck.  “We can ask him to prove it!  And then everybody will know for sure, and he can stop being so sad that nobody believes him.”  Mara waited a moment or two and then, when Karen didn’t respond immediately, shook her head and marched over to Buck and the Hans.

“Uh, what’s Mara doing?” Denny asks.  He and Hen come in, carrying snacks and drinks between them.

“I don’t know,” Karen answers slowly.  “Trying to fix Buck, it seems like.”

“Excuse me,” Mara says, stopping a few feet away from where Buck and Jee are sitting on the floor, art supplies spread out around them.  “Buck?”

“Mara!” Jee says brightly.  “Look.”  She holds up a piece of pink construction paper, a drawing of indeterminate shape half cut out of it.  “I’m making a hat for Mr. Tommy Jr. the frog!”  She takes the little pair of red safety scissors and starts cutting another line through the paper.  “He’s going to be a cowboy frog.”

Buck laughs.  “Tommy was a firefighter pilot you know, Jee.”

Jee’s tongue is stuck out of the side of her mouth in concentration.  She furrows her brow and says “Then a cowboy pilot.”

“Buck,” Mara says.  She gives him a serious look.  “Have you tried turning him back yet?”

“Wh-what?” Buck drops the crayon he’s holding and every head in the room turns Mara’s way.  “Um, Mara, what do you… what do you mean?”

Mara nods towards the tank on the coffee table.  “Your frog.  He was your boyfriend, right?”

“No,” Chim says loudly.  “He was not.”

“Hush, Howie,” Maddie says quietly, giving her husband a quick tap on the shoulder.  She turns her head to Mara and gives her a kind smile.  “That is what Buck believes, yes, but—”

“It is Tommy.”  Buck looks at the floor, a stubborn set to his jaw.  “I know it, whether the rest of you believe it or not.”

“Well you should prove it,” Mara says.  Hen makes a strangled noise behind her and Denny laughs.  “You’re Tiana!  And if he was your boyfriend, and you loved him, that’s true love, right?”

Buck’s whole, pale face goes red.  “Oh, u-uh.  That’s…  Yes, I did… I did love him, but I didn’t ever get to—”

“Then you need true love’s kiss.”  Mara seems unrepentant for interrupting–which is fair, as it’s clear Buck was about to spiral.  She picks up the tank and with every ounce of gravity she can muster she thrusts it towards Buck’s chest.  “Here,” she says, with an air of surety.  She looks him dead in the eye and says “You have to kiss the frog.”

~~~

FROG FIC TAG LIST: @harmless-variety-of-garden-snake @mustlovelou @sunsetandevningstar @hyperfocusthusly @thegingerparty @queermccoy @beanarie @fiyaerrigan

-just let me know if you want to be added or removed.

[docholligay]

I have a whole video coming about this, about confidence and being a unique dresser, but as I've been trying to do it (editing for myself for the first time!! Applaud me!) I realize it's going to take me awhile, so I promise I will have it for you by the end of the month, but for now, let's talk about boiling the frog of your own personal anxieties in post form.

I am a unique dresser. I dress in a way that draws attention. I have been doing this for a long, long time.

There are a million things I will tell you about dressing this way in public, and they're 96% good, honestly, mostly you have to deal with people telling you how nice you look. But that's for the video, and I'm working really hard on it, so I'm not going to give the milk away for free here. You gotta watch my painstakingly hand-edited artisanal woman-centered garbage!

But what I will say, is how you get used to the idea.

When I get ready to wear something that is out of my comfort zone*, I wear it a few times just for myself. I look in the mirror, not looking for flaws, really, but just observing how I look in it. What about it do I like? What do I like less? Is it bad, or am i just not used to it?

Then I wear it around the house for a whole day. I make sure to catch a look at myself whenever I pass a mirror or a window or something. I need to be able to see myself in the item because it needs to become a part of the way that I think about myself. Because that's what a lot of this kind of anxiety is. It's that, it's not a way that you think about yourself. When you see an outfit or a style and you want to imitate it, and you think, "I wish i could wear that" a lot of what is stopping you, generally, is this idea that you're not the kind of person who wears that. That it would be odd for you to. We have to fight that, and the best way to fight that, is to utterly disprove it. You ARE the sort of person who wears that, and the more you see yourself in it, the more it becomes true.

Vacations are a great time to wear something that feels new to you, especially if it feels scary. You don't know these bitches! No one will ever see you again. (I actually forget that I dress so distinctly sometimes, or rather, that it's not usual, because in my community people don't say much unless I get a new dress or hat or something. But I get so many comments when i travel ahaha) So, if you feel like the look isn't working, that's okay because in some ways, this is not your real life. This won't haunt you or follow you.

So let's say you wore it on vacation, and it was great. Just wear it to one thing. The grocery store. An easy errand. Something like that. You don't have to wear it to work where everyone knows you.

But then you do. Because the more you do it, the more you'll see that there's really nothing to be afraid of. Most of what people will notice and say is complimentary, but even if it isn't. You only get one life. This is it. You can live as the most boring version of yourself, or you can add color and interest and beauty to this world. I will take a thousand sweet lolita and leather daddies over people who don't try at all. I thank God for people who are wear too much makeup and giant painted silk caftans. They are doing the fucking thing!

When I was a little girl, I used to watch old movies, and read old books. All I wanted was to be glamorous and poised, and I used to drape my sheets around myself and imagine going to grand balls. I practiced my fine dining manners in my games, and I studied maps of the world, and I loved to wear blouses and embroidered skirts. In the eyes of my extended family, this was silly. I was putting on airs.

But I am the girl I dreamed of being. I stroll through the airport in high heels and I wear silk blouses and I drink champagne out of crystal glasses and sometimes I wonder, if I had let the fear of being ridiculed override my desire to be exceptional, who would I be? You cannot be an interesting person without doing interesting things, without doing things that other people don't. I can only imagine that ten year old Doc would see me strolling along, and gasp. And that is a good feeling.

Here is your sign. Try. It's always better to try and fail than it is to be stuck in mediocrity for the rest of your life. Tuck in your shirt. Buy the belt. Try going a week without wearing black. Without wearing a t-shirt. Expand your world, and expand the pleasure you bring to others simply by existing. It's worth a try! You are worth making an effort for.

*There ain't much left, to be quite honest, but still, it can happen.

[lunchtimebedamned1997]

Cosplay WIP and Doodle Dump >:3

Haven't really been working on a bunch of digital art lately bc I've been busy working on cosplays and crying over Stolitz XD

But I thought I'd show you all what I've been working on since I'm really excited about it! <3 (So many updates :D)

Let's start with Helluva doodles!

I finally started drawing Blitzø and Fizzy-Frog! <3 Fizzy looks so much healthier in the newst ep I could CRY ohhh my goddd. And both Fizz and Blitzø look so dapper! Little cuties! Little cuties who are friends again! My heart!

Next up: Cosplay props!

We've got a lot of stuff for the Vees, and then a liiiitle bit of Angel Dust progress to show y'all!

Let's start with Vox since I only have one main thing I've made so far!

I had an old pair of headphones that stopped working, and I'd already worn them to costest Vox (since I'm not going for the TV screen approach) and so I thought I could give them a makeover! I decided to do the symbols from his silly little hat, and paint the microphone tip to resemble the little red bauble at the end of his antenna!

I just sanded the labels off, painted everything in acrylic and then sealed it with clear nail polish, pretty simple stuff, but I'm really pleased with the effect! And I think it will be a nice touch for the costume! <3

Now onto Valentino! I have the most stuff for him so far bc everything that wretched man owns is cool AF and I wanted to make, like, all of it XD

I started with the guns from 1x02 ala: "Which of these makes me look sexier ;3" since I thought they were both pretty iconic and I definitely want to film that little clip once my cosplays are ready to go hehe

(My reference Image ^)

This pink one is definitely my favorite, both in the show and based on how it came out in the end! I've only ever built one propgun before this for Jinx, so it was really fun to get back to it again! Lots of math and measurements, but luckily I'm a little racoon creature who hordes recycling like my life depends on it XD Even though he actually bedazzles another gun in the meeting room in 1x02, I was not about to make a third one in the span of two weeks, so I decided to just put it on one side of the pink, and I really love it tbh!

The gold and grey definitely looks a bit more... cardboard-y, but I'm okay with it tbh, I don't love the design of this one as much, so I probably won't be using it on it's own as often as the pink! But I still think it turned out well overall! Especially bc by the time I got to this one my exacto-blade was crapping out on me hardcore lmao

I also have two hand options ready for Valentino! I noticed that sometimes he has gold claws, and sometimes his hands are fully black, so I thought it would be good to have a couple options!

I went ahead and ordered some pleather gloves which I think work really well for him on their own, but then I also took some fake nails and layered them with gold acrylic paints and clear nail polish to make his 'actual' hands. I figured if I need a particular close-up for a shot it would be really cool to use black facepaint on my skin, and then have these nails stuck on! I just used eyelash glue to test out affixing them last night, and I think it actually worked super well!

Since the nails are pretty, well, claw-like I don't want them on all the time, but I still need them to stay when I'm moving around in costume, and I think the eyelash glue is kind of the perfect things for my at-home cosplay needs! I'd definitely want to do something stronger if I was going to a con in these, but yeah - XD I'm rambling, anyways -

Let's move onto Velvette!

I had an extra set of gold nails I'd made, that I was originally planning on attaching to the gloves (I did not like how that looked lmao) but I didn't want them to go to waste, so I used some of the little gems and do-dads that I had laying around to make them match one of the bra-tops I'm planning to use for Velvette! (Yes that sparkly orange and pink thing on the left is what I tried to match it to!)

I have a plethora of blank fake nails now, so I think it would be really fun to make a pair that matches each of Vel's outfits! I hyper-fixated on nail art for a couple years when I was a kid, so I'm really excited to play with those skillz again lmao - especially because I can use acrylic paint for these instead of nail polish which really cuts down on cost and expands my color ranges exponentially!

The last thing I have to show you for the Vee's specifically is the wigs I ordered for them! (I want to scream, I'm so excited!!!!)

(All of these are from Wig Is Fashion btw, notspon or anything I just have really loved their wigs so far! I really hope these three work well!)

Finally, my gloves for Angel and a couple of my colored lights for filming came in, so I just threw on one of the outfits I have ready for him, the wig I styled, and the gloves to get a feel for how it was coming along :3

I think I want to get different little shorts for this look (maybe pleather?) and figure out a couple other details to add in, because I feel like there is currently too much 'blank' space in the look. I'm sure that will be lessened by the makeup, set, etc. But I want to make sure the extra looks I have for characters still feel 'designed'/styled well, obvi.

Anyways! Lots of work to do, and I still need to buy a new sewing machine so i can make some of the actual outfits from the show, but it's all a process lmao

I'm planning a full-on Angel CMV atm, as well as a ton of other videos, but that's all a ways away lmao, I wanna really put effort into it which means time haha

I did already post some little Cherri, Angel, Vox and Charlie closet-costests to my TT if y'all are interested! I've also made Millie and Blitzø horns, but tbh I just can't be assed to get pictures of all of that rn XD if you look at the most recent (as of rn lmao) 'cosplay updates' vid that's up, you can see the horns, wigs etc that I didn't show in this post!

My main links are all right here if you want 'em: https://lunchtimebedamned.carrd.co/

And with that I'm going to go have brain-off time LMAO I've been working non-stop for weeks on this. I'm also sorry to anyone waiting for the Ch.4 update on The Space Between Us, this chapter is deciding to be very slow-going and difficult. IRL stuff is probably heavily contributing to that, but oh well. Know that I am working on it <3

[gravity-falls-dreamer]

Gravity Falls: Dreamer Chapter 1: The Arrival

"Just breathe. You're okay."

That voice resonates louder than anything else in the entire multiverse. Floating in an endless void gives you plenty of time to think. Although, the more you think, the more the lines between time, space, and thought blur together. Everything is both loud and quiet. Time speeds by, but somehow, it feels like it's moving slower than ever. And in this place, at this moment, you start to understand something fundamental. Everything is exactly as it should be, yet at the same time, everything can change in an instant. Just one thought, one choice, one spark... and everything shifts.

~~~

"Grunkle Stan! I can't find the scissors!" called out a lively 13-year-old girl with long, curly brunette hair secured with a pink scrunchie. Despite her predicament, her bright grin, framed by shiny silver braces, never faltered. She wore a cozy oversized sweater adorned with a colorful rainbow and a light blue skirt. Spotting a nearby chair, she dragged it over to the counter. The stool wobbled dangerously as she stretched to peer above the cabinets for the elusive scissors, stirring up dust that made her cough.

From his seat in the living room, an elderly man with a square face, prominent bulbous nose, and bushy eyebrows grumbled. "Mabel, the last time you used the scissors, you cut a hole in my favorite jacket and called it a fancy poncho!" he called back. Despite his age, he was robust, with broad, hairy shoulders visible above his white tank top. He lounged comfortably in his armchair, dressed in blue boxer shorts and slippers, a can of soda in hand as he watched TV.

"That's only because Dipper had to make it rain frogs all day!" Mabel retorted as she plopped onto the couch, raising a cloud of dust. She wrinkled her nose, swiping at the air with her oversized sleeves. "Seriously, don't you guys ever clean in here? You knew we were coming for the summer, right?"

"Hey, don't give an old man too much shit, young lady," Stan pointed. "We just got back last night too, y'know?" He took a sip of his drink as a young man, bearing a striking resemblance to Mabel, stumbled in, exasperation written across his face as he brought in his bags. He wore a red shirt, dark blue vest, blue shorts, and a brown bomber hat that covered his curly short brunette hair.

"Mabel, I told you, like, a hundred times, the frogs had nothing to do with me!" Dipper exclaimed as he set down his bags. "They were drawn here by the weird humidity spike... and then the gnomes started throwing them at us..." he muttered.

"Ugh! C'mon, Grunkle Stan! I just need to borrow them for a moment!" Mabel groaned. Stan responded with a long, deliberately loud sip of his drink before setting it down. Mabel rolled her eyes and scanned the room. "Hey, where's Grunkle Ford?" she asked, looking puzzled.

"Eh, my brother's down in the basement, cataloging the crazy monsters we saw in the Atlantic Ocean over the past six months," Stan answered, waving his hand dismissively. "Be lucky we were here before you two. We weren't even expecting you kids for a few more hours anyway. How about you go into town and say hi to your weird little friends or something, eh?"

Mabel's eyes sparkled as she thought about her friends in town, and a bright smile spread across her face. "Alright, Grunkle Stan, you drive a hard bargain. Dipper and I can go into town and say hi to everyone. They need to know that their favorite set of twins is BACK IN TOWN!"

"Alright, Mabel," Dipper began with a chuckle. "Just let me take my bags up to the attic and unpack." He went to pick up his bag, but before he could, Mabel grabbed his hand and dragged him out the door, leaving his bags at the foot of the stairs.

"No time!" she shouted playfully as they disappeared into the surrounding woods near the Mystery Shack.

Mabel eventually stopped running, allowing Dipper to catch his breath. He grumbled about his sister's boundless energy, but soon fell in step beside her as they walked through the quiet woods. They knew all too well that the silence in these woods was deceptive and often heralded something lurking. A deep, quiet whisper drifted from the brush, and the twins quickened their pace toward town.

Before they could even reach the town, a voice called out to them.

"Hey, guys!" They turned to see a tall, red-haired young woman wearing a plaid shirt and blue jeans, topped with a blue-and-white hat adorned with a tree emblem. Her face brightened into a huge smile as she leaned in to envelop them both in a big hug.

"Wendy!" they exclaimed together, returning her embrace enthusiastically.

"You look amazing, Wendy!" Mabel complimented with a wide grin.

"Thanks! You two have definitely shot up a few inches since last year," Wendy observed, patting Dipper's head affectionately. "Still sporting my old hat?"

"You're still rocking mine," Dipper retorted with a smirk. They exchanged hats in a ritualistic fist bump, both chuckling.

As they walked through the town, greeting acquaintances cheerily, Wendy inquired, "So, how was your first year of high school? You guys enjoying being teenagers yet?"

"Pshaw!" Mabel exclaimed, waving her arms dramatically. "We've been having the time of our lives!"

"In the first week, Mabel managed to piss off three teachers with the amount of glitter she left everywhere," Dipper added, trying to suppress a laugh. Mabel shot him a playful glare before beaming again.

"They just don't appreciate true art!" she declared, flipping her hair and waving at Gorney, who waved back enthusiastically. "Ha, we watched him get eaten once."

Turning back to Wendy, Dipper asked, "So, how's the gang?"

"Oh, Robbie and the others are usually hanging out in Thompson's garage, jamming when his parents aren't home. His mom complains about the noise, so we can't really go there while they're around. Robbie's getting serious about his music, talking about going on tour and all," Wendy explained, keeping pace with them confidently.

"That's... interesting," Dipper replied, a hint of unease in his voice.

"It's good he's found a creative outlet for his moody vibes," Mabel chirped. "Are he and Tambry still together?"

"Yeah, surprisingly, they're still dating," Wendy responded, her expression thoughtful. "Tambry's become his social media manager, actually getting him gigs and stuff. Good for them."

"Cool," Dipper muttered quietly, thinking, 'Thank God I don't have to deal with that all summer,' a smirk spreading across his face.

"Oh, and that rich girl, Pacifica, has been making a mark on the town. She started a support group for people affected by Gravity Falls' weirdness," Wendy added, nodding approvingly. "She's really stepping up, driving her parents crazy. It's great to see her channel that rebellious energy."

"Wow, even Pacifica caught the rebellious bug?" Mabel mused before smiling broadly. "I knew she had it in her to be a good person."

"Speaking of good people, I haven't seen much of your friends, Mabel," Wendy remarked as they turned down another street.

"Oh, don't worry, we call each other all the time!" Mabel assured her brightly.

"Yeah, and you guys stay up until midnight, laughing like maniacs," Dipper complained, massaging the bridge of his nose. "I've lost too much sleep thanks to you. The wall between our rooms is paper-thin, you know?"

"Oh, come on, Dipper! If we didn't stay in touch, how would I ever keep up with Grenda's adventures with Marius? Plus, you wouldn't have gotten that peanut butter from China without them!"

"That is true," Dipper conceded, looking thoughtful. "That peanut butter made some pretty epic sandwiches."

Wendy laughed before continuing, "Anyway, how were Stan and Ford's trip? Did they just get back?"

"Yeah, we all got back this morning, so we haven't caught up much. Grunkle Ford's probably in his lab doing his superhero nerd stuff, and Grunkle Stan actually looks like he's lost some weight!" Mabel said, patting her belly and grinning.

"Hey, Wendy, are you working at the Mystery Shack this summer?" Dipper asked, hopeful.

"I might. It's the best job I've ever had, but with Melody running the register, if I go back, Soos might actually make me work," Wendy joked with a shiver. "But hey, it beats being sent off to some logging camp by my dad."

"It'd be great to have the whole gang back," Mabel chimed in, waving at Toby Determined. "What a weird little man."

"Speaking of weird men, we should probably get back to the shack," Dipper suggested, nudging Mabel. "It's a long walk, and I don't want to meet any monsters on our first day back."

"See you later!" Wendy called out as she waved them off.

"Bye, Wendy!" Dipper and Mabel shouted in unison as they reentered the woods, making their way back to the Mystery Shack.

The walk was peaceful, filled with the familiarity of the town and the anticipation of the summer adventures ahead. Mabel, skipping alongside Dipper, suddenly halted, pointing excitedly into the bushes.

"Dipper, do you see that?" she exclaimed, pointing ahead. "Is that a Port-a-Potty?"

"Out here in the woods?" Dipper peered in the direction she indicated, puzzled. "It's possible. Maybe it's here for the lumberjacks when they work." He scanned the area but saw no signs of any workers. Curious, he pulled out a blue journal adorned with a pine tree from his vest pocket and flipped through it quickly, finding a relevant entry about mysterious bathroom stalls in the woods of Gravity Falls.

"It looks like it might be a Portal Potty. Grunkle Ford mentioned these in his journals; they used to be strategically placed throughout the woods. This could be one of them," Dipper explained, reading from the journal. "Let's check it out—Grunkle Ford would be thrilled if we found one!"

Leading the way through the underbrush, they approached the oddity. The stall seemed utterly out of place, a lone Port-a-Potty in the middle of the forest. The door wasn't locked, so they opened it. Inside was just a toilet and a roll of toilet paper.

"Maybe it's for the bears? You know, so they can have some privacy?" Mabel quipped, but Dipper wasn't amused. He stared thoughtfully into the stall.

"It may look normal now, but remember, we're back in Gravity Falls, Mabel," he said, pulling out a pen. "Anything weird could happen here."

As he noted down his observations, the stall door slammed shut and locked, the entire stall started shaking violently as bright light erupted from within. The twins jumped back in surprise.

"Woah! Dipper! What's happening!?" Mabel cried out as the noise intensified. Dipper instinctively moved to protect her.

"I- I'm not sure!" he shouted back.

Suddenly, the door blew open with a loud bang, and something tumbled out, landing with a soft thud. The tumult ceased as quickly as it had begun.

On the ground before the now-still Portal Potty lay a woman with long, wavy red hair that shimmered with a fiery glow. Her skin was fair, spotted only with freckles. She was dressed in a flowing purple gown adorned with delicate pink arcane symbols, a wide-brimmed hat matching her dress resting beside her. She appeared disheveled and sooty as she lay unconscious on the grass, breathing shallowly.

"Dipper! We have to help her!" Mabel rushed to the woman's side.

"Is she breathing!?" Dipper hurried over to assist, checking her condition. "We need to get her back to the shack! Grunkle Ford will know what to do!"

As they moved the woman away from the peculiar stall, a flash of light momentarily brightened the area. Standing where the Portal Potty had been was a stout man in goggles and a gray jumpsuit, with a sparse covering of brown hair on his head. He fiddled nervously with a device on his wrist.

"Oh, geez," he muttered to himself, "another Portal Potty? I- I- I thought these were all deactivated by now. Oh... Who am I kidding? My work's never done."

He pressed several buttons on his wristwatch, and with another flash, both he and the Portal Potty vanished, leaving behind nothing but the quiet woods.

The twins pushed the door open with a bang as Dipper and Mabel managed to drag the unconscious woman inside by her arms.

"Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Ford! She needs help!" they called out in unison.

"Whoa, what happened? Did you guys pick a fight with a crazy hobbit?" Stan asked, rushing over with Ford to assist. Dipper and Mabel gently set the woman down on the floor, where Ford immediately knelt beside her and checked her eyes with a penlight. Seeing her pupils react, he exhaled in relief.

Ford, resembling Stan with his stern face and prominent nose, wore glasses with a tiny crack in one lens. His lean yet sturdy frame was clad in a brown duster jacket over a red turtleneck and black khakis, a blaster holstered at his side. He expertly checked the woman's pulse, his fingers adept from years of handling scientific instruments.

"She's okay. Looks like she just passed out. Stan, help me get her to the couch," Ford announced, after carefully examining her. Turning to the twins, he asked, "Where did you find her?"

"She popped out of one of those Portal Potty things!" Mabel exclaimed. Ford's eyebrows shot up in shock.

"A Portal Potty?! Boy, show me where it is! Mabel, stay here with her in case she wakes up. You're a cute girl. She'll probably respond to you best," Ford commanded. Mabel responded with a quick salute.

Ford and Dipper hurried down the trail through a bush-lined path, but when they reached the location, the stall was gone, leaving behind only a patch of flattened grass.

"It was right here!" Dipper exclaimed, wiping his brow in confusion.

"Damn," Ford muttered, frustrated. "It looks like it was moved before we could investigate. Let's head back and check on our guest."

Back at the shack, they found Stan had moved the woman to the couch. She was beginning to stir, groaning and placing a hand over her eye.

"Wh-where am I?" she stammered, trying to get her bearings. As her vision cleared, she jumped, startled by everyone around her. "Ah! Wh-who are you all? What do you w-want from me?!"

"Easy there," Ford soothed, raising his hands to show they meant no harm. "You're safe. I'm Stanford Pines, this is my brother Stanley, and these are our great-nephew and niece, Dipper and Mabel."

"Wh-where am I?" she asked again, still disoriented.

"Shouldn't we call the police?" Dipper suggested, but both Ford and Stan quickly dismissed the idea with a stern "No."

Gently, Ford reassured her, "You're in our home in Gravity Falls. Can you tell us your name?"

The woman hesitated, then nodded slightly. "M-my name is Evalin Dreamer." She gave a small, nervous bow, and the tension in the room eased.

Stan grunted. "Sounds made up," he muttered, earning a sharp look from Ford before he returned his attention to Evalin.

"Miss. Evalin, do you remember how you got here?" Ford asked gently.

Evalin sat up slowly, pressing a hand to her temple as fragments of memory darted just out of reach. "No," she admitted, her frustration evident. "I remember my name, my home, who I am...but not why I'm here. There's... nothing after that."

"Amnesia?" Dipper suggested as he brought his hand to his chin in thought. "Maybe some kind of dimensional displacement?"

"Grunkle Ford, I think she needs to rest," Mabel suggested, draping an arm around Evalin for comfort. "Maybe we can ask for her tragic backstory in the morning."

"You're right. My apologies," Ford agreed, stepping back to give her some space.

"Kids, go clear out the storage room for our... uh... guest here. She'll need a place to stay for a while," Stan directed. Dipper and Mabel hurried off, and Ford returned shortly with a glass of water for Evalin, who drank it eagerly.

Curious, Ford examined the symbols on her dress. Evalin noticed and quickly shielded her dress, discomfort clear on her face.

"D-do you mind?" she asked, voice trembling.

"Oh, um, sorry about that," Ford apologized, rubbing the back of his neck. Stan rolled his eyes at his brother's tactlessness.

"Sheesh, Sixer, give her some space before you turn her into a science project," Stan chided

before throwing his head over his shoulder. "Kids! Is the room ready?"

"Just putting on the final touches!" Mabel called back, her tone sounding surprisingly cheerful. Stan pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Well, damn, who knows what she could be up to in there. Alright, forest lady, can you walk?" he asked, eyeing Evalin. She nodded and forced herself to stand up, her legs very wobbly. Ford went to catch her but she straightened up and walked forward, her dress gliding against the ground as she followed Stan through the foyer and down the hallway across from the parlor room.

They found that the twins have moved a bunch of items into the hallway that where clearly from the storage room, leaving just a narrow path through. The room itself was mostly empty except for a mattress on the floor surrounded by fluffy pillows and blankets, with string lights twinkling above. Evalin sat down on the bed, sinking into the cushions that smelled faintly of mothballs.

"Th-thank you," she whispered, still trembling. Mabel flashed her a reassuring smile.

"Hey, don't worry! Get some rest!" she chirped. "And don't worry about the whole 'strangers in the woods dragging you to their home' thing. You're safe here!"

"Damn it, Mabel!" Dipper hissed, elbowing her in the side. "Don't say stuff like that!"

"Oh, right. Well, good night! Sleep tight! Don't let the bedbugs bite!" she said in a singsong tone.

"Yeah, seriously, don't let 'em bite. They hurt like hell," Stan added before closing the door.

Evalin lay back on the mattress, stretching her arms out as she placed her hat beside her. She pulled the blanket over herself, her mind reeling with confusion and fear. Everything felt so overwhelming. The ache in her head, the tightness in her chest, and the complete uncertainty of her situation. Thoughts swirled too fast for her to keep up as she rubbed her face. She looked around, not feeling the presence of someone familiar.

"M-master?" she whispered, as if she was silently calling out, hoping for a response. However, the room remained quiet. She shifted in the bed and pulled the blanket over herself. Tears started to form in her eyes as she realized this was the first time in what felt like an eternity when she had to sleep alone. She closed her eyes and allowed her exhaustion to take over, pulling her into sleep.

Ford sat at the dining table, sipping coffee amidst a clutter of journals and books, notes and diagrams strewn about. He had been deciphering the symbols on Evalin's dress since the previous night without success. Exasperated, he closed his eyes and tilted his head back.

"M-morning," came a voice from the living room. Ford turned to see Evalin in the doorway, her appearance still marred by soot, her expression groggy.

"Morning. You're up early," Ford remarked, scanning her tired eyes, not yet aware of the late hour himself.

"Yeah, new places do that to me," she replied with a shrug. "Looks like you didn't sleep much either. Your first night here too?"

Ford chuckled, shaking his head. "No, this is my place. I'm just used to working through the night." He gestured toward the scattered journals and notes about her symbols.

"Wow, you wrote all this from our chat last night? Impressive that you remembered what my sigils looked like," Evalin said, leaning over the notes. As she reached out to look closer, she saw how filthy her hands were and realized how desperately she needed a shower. "Hey, um, do you have any spare clothes? I could use a shower, and I probably shouldn't wear this again without washing it," she added, her cheeks tinting with embarrassment.

Ford cleared his throat, taken aback by the oversight. "Of course, I might have something you can wear. Let me show you to the bathroom, and I'll grab it for you," he offered, leading her down the hallway.

The door opened to reveal a small but surprisingly clean room. A shower, sink, and a toilet were squeezed into the cramped space but there was still enough room to stand comfortably. There was a stack of towels on a small cabinet in the corner and a robe hanging on the wall.

Ford left her at the bathroom for a moment to head over to his room in the parlor and quickly returned. He handed her a pile of clothes; a black t-shirt and a pair of drawstring pants. Evalin slowly took them, looking them over.

"Heh, looks like I'm going to have to go commando," she chuckled to herself under her breath. Her eyes widened as her face turned red with embarrassment, locking eyes with Ford, unsure if he heard her or not. "OH! UM! THANK YOU!" she shouted as she disappeared into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

With shaky breath, Evalin started the water to warm up and got undressed. As the water hit her body, she could hear something outside the shower curtain. She peaked out just in time to see little mouse people not even a few inches tall, grabbing her hat and trying to run off with it.

"Hey! Put that back!" she shouted at them. Having been caught, the little mouse people dropped the hat and made a run into a small hole in the wall like mice. Evalin let out a sigh of annoyance. "Great, rambunctious Brownies... Really?"

Evalin quickly finished up her shower and got dried and dressed, throwing her hat back on her head. She exited the bathroom, dirty clothes in her hands, and met up with Ford in the dining area. "Excuse me? Where is your washing machine?"

"Follow me, I'll show you," Ford said as he stood up from his chair again. He led her around the corner behind her to the utility closet where there was a washer and dryer combo tucked away in the corner. Evalin let out a sigh of relief as she entered.

"Oh, thank the stars. I thought I was going to have to wash my clothes by hand," she said as she dropped her clothes into the washer. The machine roared to life as it began to wash her clothes. "Where are the man who looks like you and those kids? I haven't seen them all morning."

Ford leaned against the wall, watching the washer fill. "That would be my brother Stanley, and the kids, Dipper and Mabel. They're still asleep. They'll be up soon enough." He crossed his arms, his gaze lingering on Evalin. There was something intriguing about her, something he couldn't quite pinpoint yet.

"Hm? What's on your mind?" Evalin asked, tilting her head as she tried to gauge the correct amount of laundry detergent. She furrowed her brow, unsure of the measurements, and ended up pouring about half a cup into the machine.

"It's nothing major, really. I've been trying to decode those symbols on your dress. I can't find anything about them, and it's been driving me crazy," Ford replied, shaking his head in mild frustration.

"My sigils? Oh! I crafted them myself. They're for protection, devotion, luck—things like that," Evalin explained, her hand waving vaguely through the air. She suddenly became self-conscious as she realized how much she was sharing. "S-sorry, that's probably a bit odd…"

Ford's eyebrow lifted as she detailed the sigils, his expression one of intrigue. "Odd? No, not at all. It's actually incredibly fascinating." He stepped closer, his gaze fixed on the sigils now tumbling in the washing machine. "You created these yourself? For protection, devotion, and luck?"

"Y-yes," Evalin stuttered, a bit taken aback. "It's part of my Craft." As Ford stroked his chin thoughtfully, Evalin noticed his six-fingered hands. Curiosity overtook her, and she reached out to examine his hand, marveling at the extra digit.

"Wow! You have a sixth finger that actually works! And on both hands! That's amazing!" She blushed deeply as she realized she was still holding his hand and quickly let go. "I-I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to—"

Ford chuckled, waving off her apology. "It's quite alright. Yes, I was born with them. But you don't seem to find it strange at all."

"Strange? No way!" Evalin exclaimed, her eyes sparkling with curiosity. "It's incredibly rare to see functional extra digits. It's fascinating!"

Ford laughed again, clearly amused by Evalin's enthusiasm. He extended his hand again. "Feel free to examine as much as you'd like. I appreciate the curiosity."

Gratefully, Evalin took his hand again, carefully observing how the muscles in his hand worked. Meanwhile, Ford's attention drifted back to the washing machine. Noticing his gaze, Evalin quickly shut the lid.

"Probably should close that, huh?" she said sheepishly. "Sorry about that."

Ford gave her a gentle smile, dismissing her concern. "No need to apologize. I shouldn't have stared. It's just that your ability to create those symbols is quite remarkable. Your Craft is clearly something I'm not familiar with."

Evalin chuckled, releasing Ford's hand. "Well, it's probably not exactly common around here. Back home, I have a cabin where I spend a lot of time studying and practicing. It's quite secluded—nice and peaceful."

Ford nodded, clearly intrigued. "I see. You practice your Craft in isolation. Sounds very..." He searched for the right word, his hand miming the action of searching through the air, "mysterious."

"That's one way to put it," Evalin said with a nervous giggle. "Anyway, I'm sorry to ask this but do you have something to eat?"

Ford chuckled at her sudden shift in topic, but decided to roll with it. She didn't come out for dinner with them earlier so she must be hungry for sure. "Ah, yes, yes, apologies. Follow me." He led her into the kitchen which was adjacent to the dining area and gestured for her to sit down while he went through the cabinet to find something for her to eat. Evalin took a seat and studied the world around her, noting how dirty the room was.

"Man, those three seem to sleep pretty heavy," she said, referencing to Stan and the kids before she glanced over at the clock on the microwave. "Oh, that makes sense. It's 3:30 in the morning."

Ford, checking the time himself, chuckled in agreement. "Yes, they won't be up for hours. Time does fly when you're caught up in research." He brought over some bread, peanut butter, and jelly. "I take it you don't sleep much either?"

"Not with the Brownies in my stuff," Evalin grumbled with her cheeks puffed before looking over at Ford in shock. "Oh, um, I mean- hahaha! Brownies? What's that? Never heard of them!" She tried to laugh it off but it was very clear she knew more than what she was letting on.

Ford chuckled, a smirk on his face as he heard her attempt to play dumb. It was obvious she knew about the supernatural world. She must have come from somewhere where she felt it was necessary to hide this fact. Ford took a seat across from her at the table, his chin propped up on his hand. 'This girl is in Gravity Falls now. If she thinks she can hide the supernatural, she has another thing coming,' Ford thought to himself.

"Just letting you know, you don't have to pretend. I'm well aware of what Brownies are," he said, his tone slightly amused.

"Y-you are?" Evalin asked, flushed as she started to make herself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. She lowered the butter knife before looking up at him. "And it doesn't weird you out?"

Ford shook his head, the smirk on his face growing. He leaned forward against the table as he spoke. "Not at all. I've seen more than my fair share of the supernatural, so Brownies are pretty tame in comparison."

"Then why are they mad at you?" Evalin asked bluntly as she furrowed her brow and puffed her cheeks out. "They tried to take my stuff."

The room was quiet for a bit until Ford chuckled wryly, a bitter expression on his face. "Let's just say, we got into it with moving stuff around. Might have unintentionally inconvenienced them a time or two. As I'm sure you know, Brownies don't like to be bothered as they prefer solitude."

Evalin jumped in her seat as if Ford had said something offensive. "WHAT?! That's not true! They are very social creatures! They love to help but they need things in return! They like shiny and sweet things. I mean, they are very easy to live with and will even help clean those hard to reach spots like on the top of cabinets!" Ford was taken aback by her quick defense of the little creatures. He raised an eyebrow, his expression slightly amused by her zealous proclamation of the Brownies. "Ah, I see. So you have some experience with them, do you? You seem to speak from personal experience."

Evalin was in mid-bite as Ford spoke. Her face turned red as she pulled down her hat slightly to cover her eyes. "Y-yeah, back at home. I-I'm sorry if this is all weird. I-I didn't mean to get all uppity."

Ford chuckled as he shook his head. "No, no. It's not weird at all. I think it's actually quite impressive. Most people don't even know Brownies exist, let alone have a personal experience with them." He shifted his weight to lean his chin on his other closed hand. "Let's see. You've lived in a cabin all by yourself, have experience with supernatural creatures, and you make sigils by yourself." He paused for a moment before continuing.

"You're a very interesting character, aren't you?"

"I-I-" Flustered, Evalin stuttered uncontrollably. "I-I'm s-sorry. I-I think I'm g-going to go lay b-back down." She quickly got up and, with sandwich in hand, scurried off towards her room, leaving Ford bewildered at the table.

He watched her go, a curious look on his face. "A very interesting character, indeed."

Sunlight poured through the unshielded window as the light awoken Evalin. She sat up and stretched wide, blinking a few times as she tried to make sense of her surroundings. Everything was just as strange and unfamiliar as yesterday so at least she could write it off as not an illusion. She was definitely far from home. Rubbing her eyes, she grabbed her hat and stepped out of the room.

As soon as she opened the door, the sharp smell of burn food hit her immediately, accompanied by the sounds of bickering from the kitchen.

"Holy hell, Mabel! You'd think by now you'd know how to cook simple pancakes!" Dipper yelled, his voice followed by a loud splat.

"Hey! I'm doing great, thank you very much! It's all part of the process," Mabel fired back. Objects clattered and laughter echoed through the house.

"You kids need to keep it down!" Stan called out, trying to stop the bickering. "The crazy woods lady is still sleeping, I think."

"Well, I highly doubt she is now," Ford added.

Evalin peered into the hallway, making sure there was no one around, and spotted a neat stack of her clothes, folded nicely on the floor in front of her door. Flushing with embarrassment at the thought of someone handling her clothes, she quickly grabbed up the pile and dashed off to the bathroom. As she was getting dressed, she found an envelope in the pile with green paper in it that she eyed curiously. Without thinking much of it, she placed it in her bra for safe keeping. Clearly it was something they wanted her to have.

After taking care of morning business, Evalin caught sight of herself in the mirror. "Good god, girl, you look like you've been through a wood chipper," she grumbled, splashing cold water on her face to wash off the sweat. She grimaced as she attempted to smooth her unruly hair, then grabbed some mouthwash to freshen her breath. It wasn't as thorough as brushing, but it was a temporary fix. With a sigh, she murmured, "This is a problem."

A soft knock at the door startled her. "Evalin? Are you in there?" Ford called out gently. "Mabel's offering to take you into town for some supplies when you're ready. I also have a few questions for you whenever you have a moment."

Evalin stayed silent, listening until Ford's footsteps receded down the hallway. Once sure he was gone, she quietly slipped outside. The warmth of the sun caressed her skin, and she inhaled deeply, savoring the fresh air. It wasn't quite home, but the surrounding nature held its own charm.

Her tranquility was soon disrupted by Mabel, who burst through the screen door with boundless energy. She hurried over to Evalin, beaming. "There you are! Sorry about breakfast. I tried making Mabel Cakes, but they were a burning disaster. Let's head to town and grab a bite before shopping for some new clothes! Never shop on an empty stomach, right?" She paused, pondering. "Or does that only apply to food shopping? I mean, you don't eat clothes, right? Of course, not! Come on, let's go!"

Mabel's enthusiasm was overwhelming, and before Evalin could respond, she found herself being energetically tugged towards Gravity Falls, a nervous lump forming in her throat. Mabel, oblivious to Evalin's growing apprehension, continued chatting. "You know, Evalin, I think you'll enjoy it here. Everyone's a bit quirky, but they're nice. We'll go to the diner where Lazy Susan works—you can't miss her; she's the one with one eye that opens normally. Don't worry, she's super nice! Grunkle Stan even dated her once!"

Returning to the shack with Mabel, Evalin felt slightly out of place. She realized how unfamiliar she was with this world, especially when she discovered that the green paper in the envelope was actually money. Without pausing, Evalin hurried to her room to prepare herself. She slipped into a simple dark gray sundress and set her wide-brimmed hat atop her freshly brushed hair. After neatly arranging her new clothes in the corner, she placed her brand new tarot deck on top.

Curious, Evalin picked up the deck. She studied the cards before placing them back in order. After a few calming breaths, she reshuffled and drew a single card: The Fool. She let out a sigh.

"New beginnings... that makes sense. But what about yesterday?" she asked aloud. She drew another card: The Tower. A chill ran down her spine. Yesterday had indeed been a chaotic turning point that she was not ready for. "Alright, one more," she murmured before shuffling again. A single card fell from her hands: the Two of Cups. She felt a bit of relief. That card symbolized connection and trust in those around her.

A voice called from the other side of the door. "Hey, Evalin. It's me, Dipper. Grunkle Stan and Grunkle Ford wanted me to tell you that they want you to join us in the living room. Of course, no pressure. Just thought I'd let you know. Uh, yeah, anyway... See you around, I guess." Evalin listened as Dipper's footsteps retreated down the hall.

After a moment of reflection, she carefully returned the cards to their box and placed it beside her pillow. As she walked into the living room, she noticed everyone already gathered. Stan occupied the armchair, Dipper sat at one end of the couch, and Mabel was in the middle, patting the vacant spot next to her while offering a warm smile, inviting Evalin to join them.

"Damn, Evi! You look amazing!" Mabel exclaimed.

"Th-thank you," Evalin stammered, sitting down quickly as she pulled down her hat to cover her flushed face.

From across the room, Ford cleared his throat, adopting a more serious tone. "Evalin, we have a few questions for you. The kids mentioned they found you in the woods yesterday, emerging from something we refer to as a Portal Potty. Do you recall anything about how you ended up there?"

Evalin froze for a second before shaking her head. "N-no, I don't remember much. I remember being at home, another normal day, but after that, everything gets... really bright."

"Bright?" Ford leaned forward, his interest piqued, jotting notes in one of his journals. "Could you elaborate on that?"

"Well, it was like a fierce blaze before my eyes," Evalin described, her voice carrying a distant tone. "And then, I found myself here." She paused, took a deep breath, and then continued, "Let me introduce myself properly.

As I said before, my name is Evalin Dreamer. My moon sign is Cancer. I'm a researcher in my own right into my Craft and my favorite animal are jellyfish."

Mabel's eyes lit up. "I love jellyfish too!" she exclaimed with her hands on her cheeks.

"Mabel, you just like animals," Dipper pointed out with a chuckle.

A heavy silence followed, the air thick with unanswered questions. As the pause stretched on, everyone grew more anxious. Breaking the awkwardness, Stan stood up. "This is getting weird. I'm gonna grab some snacks. Dipper, help me out in the kitchen?" With a wave of his hand, he led Dipper, with Mabel following close behind, into the kitchen.

As the room emptied, a soft rustling noise came from the end table near Stan's chair. "Hey!" Ford snapped, glaring at the little mouse-like creatures that were attempting to scurry off with the remote. "Damn it! Leave the damn remote alone!"

"I told you, they're upset," Evalin giggled, a playful tone in her voice. "Where I come from, they're quite common. They usually leave little trinkets, and I do the same for them. They can be very helpful." She leaned forward, resting her chin on her hand. "You know, I could probably help you manage them."

"That would be very helpful," Ford responded, stepping aside to observe her.

Before she could begin, Dipper, Mabel, and Stan returned, arms laden with snacks. Evalin reached out and snagged a cookie from Stan's stash. "Hey!" Stan protested, but Ford shushed him.

"Quiet, Stanley," Ford interjected, his journal ready. "Evalin is about to show us how to handle our little Brownie problem."

"Brownies? Like the dessert?" Mabel inquired with a quizzical lift of her brow.

"Not quite," Evalin chuckled lightly. "Brownies are mischievous fae creatures."

"That's putting it mildly," Stan muttered, rolling his eyes. "Those little bastards hide everything—remotes, car keys, my glasses, even my hearing aid."

"If they're upset, they'll move things like that," Evalin explained. "But if you win them over, they'll live with you peacefully. Watch." She took the cookie to a small hole behind Stan's chair and knelt down. "What the hell? When did that get there?" Stan grumbled, squinting at the hole.

Mabel dropped her snacks on the couch and rushed to join Evalin, watching intently as she placed the cookie by the hole. "Let's see if they come out to play," Evalin said with a soft smirk. "I'm sorry if we startled you. Please accept this as a peace offering. I look forward to working together."

Moments later, the tiny creatures emerged, took the cookie, and vanished back into the hole. Evalin smiled broadly, relieved. "Oh, good! They accepted it. Looks like you didn't piss them off too much."

"Interesting," Ford exclaimed, fervently scribbling notes. "How did you know that would work?"

"Trial and error," Evalin shrugged. "When you've been around as long as I have, you pick up a few tricks. I grew up learning about the unseen world—well, unseen to most. Sorry if this is a bit much."

"Pfft," Mabel scoffed. "If you think that's weird, wait till you meet the gnomes!"

A look of disgust flickered across Evalin's face. "Ew, please tell me there aren't any gnomes here," she groaned, raising her hand to forestall any replies and rubbing her temples. "Never mind, I'll find out soon enough. If you'll excuse me, I need some air."

"Do you want—?" Mabel began, but Evalin cut her off.

"I'd like some time alone, if that's okay. Don't worry, I won't get lost." With that, Evalin slipped on her knee-high boots and stepped outside.

As the early evening sun filtered through the trees, it cast golden beams of light onto the woodland floor. Spying a basket just outside the shack, Evalin grabbed it and headed into the thicket, the fresh air filling her lungs and easing her with each breath. Wandering down winding paths, she stumbled upon lavender plants and quickly gathered large bundles to dry later, placing them into the basket. Along the way, she also picked up some intriguing sticks and stones and paused at a river to wash the rocks she had found. To her delight, among them was a beautiful citrine, a clear quartz, and an amethyst. Satisfied with her finds, she carefully placed them back in the basket.

Setting the basket aside, Evalin undressed and draped her clothes over her collected items before stepping into the cool river water. The refreshing flow seemed to cleanse away any lingering negativity. A small frog hopped nearby and croaked at her. Smiling, Evalin offered it a gentle pat on the head. The frog, seemingly startled, paused before hopping away. Her laughter mingled with the sound of the river as she leaned back into the welcoming embrace of the water.

After enjoying the peaceful river for a while, Evalin realized the sun was setting, and the sky was darkening as stars began to twinkle into view. She dried off, dressed, and picked up her basket, full of her day's discoveries. Seeking a clearer view of the night sky, she found a hill and climbed to its crest. Settling into the soft grass, she looked up at the twinkling expanse above. Just then, a familiar voice pierced the serene silence.

"I see you've also discovered this spot," Ford greeted with a warm smile. Startled by his voice, Evalin jumped, but Ford raised his hand in a calming gesture. "Don't worry. I'm just here to study the stars. May I join you?"

"I-I suppose," Evalin replied, slightly startled as she made room for him. Ford sat down beside her, and they quickly settled into a comfortable silence.

"Do you enjoy stargazing?" Ford broke the silence after a moment. Evalin blinked, taken aback by his question.

"Of course, I do," she responded as if it were the most natural thing in the world, her voice becoming lively as she pointed upwards. "There's Aquila and Ophiuchus. And up there is Hercules. Oh, you can even see Lyra tonight! That's my favorite." Her face lit up with a bright smile. "I'm so glad they're visible here."

"You seem quite knowledgeable," Ford observed, his voice even. Evalin blushed, suddenly self-conscious, and began to pull her hat over her eyes to hide her embarrassment.

"S-sorry, I know this must sound strange," she stammered, but Ford shook his head.

"Not at all strange. I study similar subjects, though I call it Unusuology," he reassured her with a smile. "It's refreshing to meet someone who shares these interests." He turned his attention back to the stars. "Listen, I don't know how you ended up here or who you are, but there's a reason you're here. What that reason is, I'm not sure yet. However, I do hope you grow to love Gravity Falls."

"Thank you, Mr. Pines," Evalin replied softly, moved by his kindness.

"Please, Mr. Pines was my father," Ford chuckled. "Call me Stanford, or Ford." He gave her a warm smile, causing Evalin's heart to flutter.

"Oh, um, thank you, Stanford," she said, fidgeting with her hat, too shy to use his nickname just yet. "You can call me Evi if you'd like. That's what Mabel started calling me today in town. It seems that's my name now."

"Oh? Mabel's given you a nickname already?" Ford raised an eyebrow, grinning. "That's a good sign. She must like you, but then again, she likes everyone. Don't let that discourage you, though." He stood and offered her his hand. "I'm heading back now. Care to join me?"

Evalin hesitated, then took his hand, feeling a warmth spread through her. "Oh, uh, sure," she answered softly. "I'd like that." She nodded, and Ford easily helped her to her feet.

Evalin reached into her basket and rummaged through it. Pulling out a small flower with pointed, tubular petals, she offered it to Ford. "Here," she said, handing him a flower. "These are sugar flowers. Just pluck the petals and suck the nectar from the bottom."

Ford watched as Evalin demonstrated, tasting the sweet nectar for himself. Surprised by the burst of sweetness, he followed her lead while Evalin continued enjoying the sugar flowers.

"Ah, I should probably stop," she remarked, pulling away from the flowers. "I was planning to make them into syrup for lavender tea. We should get going before I decide to eat them all."

Ford chuckled softly and led the way down the hillside. They walked back to the shack in a comfortable silence, the moonlight leading the way. The shack was quiet; it seemed everyone else had retired for the night. Ford walked Evalin to her room before retreating to his own down the hall.

After bidding each other goodnight, Evalin closed her door and got to work. She tied up the lavender she'd collected and hung it in the window to dry. She tucked the amethyst under her mattress and placed the citrine in the window to catch the light. The clear quartz she set atop her tarot deck. She then picked a few sprigs of mint and tucked them under the mat at her door, wrapped a few sticks with twine and some of her hair, and hung them over the door frame. It wasn't much, but it began to feel a bit more like home, even though she knew it wasn't.

Evalin lay on her bed, arms stretched above her as the string lights flickered overhead. The shack felt cozy, almost peaceful, yet her chest tightened with unease.

She closed her eyes, chasing memories that danced just out of reach. She could still picture her cabin, the woods she once called home, the sigils carved into the floorboards. But beyond that... blankness. A sudden, terrible void.

Her hand clenched the blankets tightly as she tried to recall what had happened . "What happened to me?" she whispered into the darkness.

The stars outside twinkled faintly, as if mocking her question.

Chapter 2 >

[songbird-oracle]

Live thoughts watching Fantasy High Junior Year episode 5

Spoilers ahead

Im so nervous already about Cassandra

These dudes getting swole

It IS spicy tonight in the dome

Screaming

I WANT A BOGGY KISS

OH FUCK SHES HOLD MONSTERING KRISTEN

THE SECURITY COMING THROUGH OH SHIT

“Do you want me to kill that guy for you 👀” vibes

OH NO PLEASE NO NIGHTMARE KING OH NO OH NO

I’m Shittering my pants rn

No not the girlies!

Located in the astral mall, This place has *everything*. Ripped valley girls, a goddess and prophet and familiar going through a very tumultuous time in their relationship, a frog wearing a paper hat, and a weird ass clock

I live for the hangman banter

Oml I love the Yarrbucks coffee art

LOU HOLY SHIT

BOX OF DOOM DC5!? The stakes are seriously so high though

Okaaaaaaaay 13 works ig

“Does she need scratchies?”

Wooo Murph!!

THE STAR TALKS!?

I love Emily’s reaction to “banging out a 1st level spell”

Riz sadly flossing

Oh no Kristen oh no Cassandra!

No stop attacking Cassandra!!!!

🎶non-a-crits🎶

Thank goodness no failures

Break it up guys come ooooooooon

Damn, man needs strudel with sauce at a time like this

Profiling the minis 🤣

NOT THE TAP DANCING

“I don’t think you’re scared, I think you’re mad. And that’s okay” I’m sobbing

YES THE FUCKING SECURITY DETAIL

Kristen is so low, oh no

A 0 initiative 🥲

FUCK THIS IS WHAT RAGHS MOM ABSORBED!?!? Gorgug is the greatest wizard of our time

Abjurative grammar is prescriptive. Iykyk.

I knew the DC would be high

NAT 20 BEARDSLEY IN THE FUCKING HOUUUUUUUSE

YESSSSS HEALED CASSANDRA 😭

Oh fuck oh fuck bad stars

Let it out Cassandra, feel your feelings

Oh my goodness, philosophers scone

OOP PAUL BLART INTERGALACTIC MALL COP

It’s not the nightmare king??????

41 damage each, damn Adaine

We aren’t even half way through guys

BAHAHAHAHAHHA playful picking on Riz

Mass dispelling?? Damn

????? TUMMY ACHE SURVIVOR????

THE SHRIMP!!!!!!

Why is Fig a walking embodiment of Murphy’s law rn???

WHAT THE FUCK

NO NO NO DID GILEAR STEAL HER LUCK??????

IS THIS QUADRANGLE FUCKERY??????

Okay it’s just a curse

WAIT WHAT???

Cloaca why 😂

Whoopsies, shattered the shatter star

Oh fuck, rage Adaine is scary dude

Is this some rage and revenge deity??

Anyone but Conor

BAHAHAHAHAHA “no no, this is gonna happen”

“Stay hot Conor”

NOT KALINA NO

RAGH??????

Not the shimmy

WHAT IS KALINAS AC

44 DAMAGE??

Old Fabian

Legend has it the wizard is still waiting for his strudel with sauce

WHAT THE FUCK NO NOT CASSANDRA NO NO NO

“Unfortunately stop flossing”

COMPELLED DUEL ON KALINA OH FUCK

3!!!!! Woooooo!!!!!

Worst mall cop ever, Paul Blart would never

🤣 “is that not property damage??”

I’m so scared for Cassandra guys

Kristen and Cassandra are down oh no 🥲

BARDIC SHRIMPSPIRATION

NO NAT ONE NO NOOOOOOOO

Somewhere Katja Cleaver is raging because Conor Counterspell said he hates horses

A ball. Not *the* ball

ARMOR ZOMBIE AND LICH IM LIVING FIR THESE NAMES

Bards and Noble 🤣

Kristen coming in with the hugs

Box of doom has been working hard this episode

Shake out the bad ones

Screaming crying throwing up

I can’t look

Dammit Murph

Ecaf again

“What are you talking about girlieeeee?”

Brendan’s stare scares me

FUCK

Strudel for the win Girlie!!!

“One more roll girlie 🤪”

Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no circle of death oh no

COUNTERSPELL MY BELOVED

“How old are you” “45” “gross”

WAIT WHAT TIME REVERSE TO- TEN SECONDS

Conor, you’re the best secret service agent ever

WHAT????? WHERES CASSANDRA??????

WHAT????????

I’m so fucking scared right now

Wait is Cassandra a triple goddess? Like how Hekate is a triple goddess, is Cassandra one? Cause Cassandra, Nightmare king, and a divine thing that isn’t a different divinity?

I want to enjoy “we got that bad boy buttered” but I can’t 🥲

Dead stare 🥲

I love Hangman 🥹

Feral Murph

NAT 20 SHRIMP JUMP

Thousand yard stare

Best shrimp jump ever

Maximum legend

That’s right, kick flip the system

Fuck KandyKorn Lullaby

See you at Basrars, I’ll be sobbing into my ice cream

[noctis4eil333]

General Message - (Pick a Pile):

~ ♬ ~ ♬ ~ ♬ ~

Take what resonates and leave what doesn't ♡

- Pile 1 ♬: The butterfly

Open yourself, let yourself explore the doors of possibilities when it comes to your life, career, practice etc. Do not let anybody control you or tell you what your destiny is. As you thread forward, learn to make your own choices, express yourself and be comfortable in your own skin. People will come and go but remember that you are with your own self forever, you want to make the best choices that benefit you in the long run and you want to do it with a clear head after careful thinking. Mistakes will be made but remember to learn from them and do not dwell on the past. You choose your own destiny.

Channeled song and more: beach, ducks, fluffly pillows, 444, snakes, red wine in a glass cup, green car, silver ring on a white table

- Pile 2 ♬: Gentle hands

For my pile 2s, I encourage to go on a journey of self discovery and stop trying to fit into what you are simply not. Why do you try to be like others around you? You need to embrace your own uniqueness and your own power. You don't need to be like someone just because you look up to them or you think they will like you better. If they do not like you for who you are then they are simply not worth your time. Find your own thing, hobby, sense of style, something you actually enjoy doing. Not something you took from someone. Enjoy being yourself and who you are, embrace it.

Channeled song and more: Frogs, rose scented candles, white candles, birthdays, Lavender, eggs, floaties, slippers, wrist-bands, hats

- Pile 3 ♬: The scorpion

Learn to leave out the bad and welcome the good. For my pile 3s, you must learn to cut out toxic people and things that don't serve you at all. If it does not benefit you then it does not deserve to share the same space as you, you know your worth and you should prioritize your well being over things that don't serve you. A lot of you might feel guilty about cutting out people from your life due to having shared many emotional memories with them, despite that the hurt they have done to you won't just dissipate into thin air. It is okay to reminisce the good times but, you will also end up reminiscing the bad and your view of that person will already have changed by then. You need to learn when to just let it go. Move forward and leave the baggage behind. Free yourself.

Channeled song and more: Ballet, boats, silver spoon, empty sink, picnic baskets, white pens

[mariamakeslemons]

Chapter 7 (Turned into a Frog and Crushed)

TW: pseudo-animal death

It's always fun to use tried and true magic tropes. Especially to kill a certain Austrian.

Gaz may or may not be sulking in the rec room right now, arms crossed and pout on his face. Soap, however, is absolutely taking the piss out of him.

“It’s okay,” the Scotsman coos mockingly, “Ye don’ need tae see yer love e’ery day.”

“Fuck off with that,” Gaz grouses, pouting harder at the wall. You told him about Ostara coming up and how busy the shop can get.

“I love you, but I need to focus on work before Ostara. Once we’ve passed it, I’ll take you out on a date. Wherever you want to go, I’ll go.” He didn’t necessarily want that promise, but the foot traffic in your shop was picking up already and you were obviously needed by the customers shopping. So, he accepted Price’s new hat (“His name is Price?!” “Yeah, what did you think it was?” “Captain.”) from you and left back to Base. So, here he is, maybe pouting, as he waits for something to happen.

“Wut’s your problem?” Ghost asks, leaning on the back of the sofa Gaz is currently laying on.

“He’s pou’in’ ‘cause he cannae see his bonnie witch,” Soap immediately rats out, yelping when Gaz flings a pillow at the Scots’ head. Ghost just watches as his boyfriend drops from the “attack”, humming while sipping from a water bottle.

“Why can’ you see ‘em?” Ghost asks, acting polite. Gaz immediately feels tomfoolery happening, looking up at Ghost warily.

“…They’re busy with the upcoming holiday,” Gaz eventually answers.

“Pussy,” Ghost immediately states, dodging the second pillow Gaz throws.

“Gaz, pick ‘em up,” Price sighs upon stepping into the room and seeing the pillows on the floor.

“Yes sir,” he groans, rolling off the couch and onto his feet. Picking up one, Gaz yelps and falls over when a sudden burst of smoke appeared beside him.

“Young Kyle, I need your assistance,” Prometheus declares, holding tightly onto a goliath bullfrog as a white cat lounges on his shoulders. The old man explains, “I fear we must act soon if Child is to recover their magic at all.”

“What do you mean?” Gaz asks weakly as Ghost, Price, and Soap all point guns at the old witch.

“Who are you?” Price growls, narrowing his eyes at the old witch. The white cat turns its head to look at Price, blinking once. Its eyes change from that of a feline to uncomfortably human.

“Do not speak to my beloved like that, Jonathan Price,” the cat hisses in the voice of an older man. Without looking, Prometheus taps the cat’s head.

“Merlin, please stop using Allan as a telephone,” he scolds as Gaz chokes. Price drops his gun, obviously thrown at the talking cat and the use of the name of the legendary Wizard. The cat huffs before blinking again, its eyes appearing like a normal cat’s once more. It settles back on his shoulder and watches as Prometheus turns and bows toward Price.

“I do apologize for my rudeness, but I need the help of my apprentice’s soulmate to break the Bond that has been placed on them,” he explains. Soap and Ghost lower their guns as well, looking between Gaz, Prometheus, and Price.

“There’s a way t’ do that!?” Gaz asks excitedly.

“Who are y’ talkin’ about?” Price asks with a frown. Gaz jumps and offers a sheepish grin while Prometheus blinks, as if just realizing the others are still in the room.

“My apologies again,” the old witch offers, “I go by the name of Prometheus, and I am the Child’s teacher. I believe you recently helped them with recovering a certain fool’s body from an extremely dangerous creature.” Gaz sees when everything clicks in his team’s head, as Ghost and Soap relax a little while Price leans forward.

“So, there’s a way to sever the Bond that König forced on them?” their captain asks, crossing his arms.

“Indeed,” Prometheus says, even as the frog in his hand starts croaking loudly, “It will be slightly difficult, however, it is possible with my help along with their cooperation.” He gives the frog a slight squeeze, causing the frog to let out an almost yelp noise, “And, as the bastard that Bound them is not a magician in any sense of the word, it won’t matter if he knows or not.”

“…Wait,” Ghost pauses, before looking purposefully at the bullfrog. Said frog goes very still, seeming to make eye contact with Ghost, before letting out a rapid, terrified series of croaks when Ghost grabs the thing.

“This him,” he states, waving around the obviously distressed frog.

“Of course it is,” Prometheus admits unapologetically, “He’s the bastard that has been stealing magic he can’t even use from my apprentice. Being turned into a frog is the least of his worries.”

“Wait, stealin’ magic?” Soap pipes in, “How’s ‘e able tae do tha’?” Prometheus waves his hand holding said frog, uncaring of the trauma he’s obviously putting König through.

“That is admittedly another thing I wish to ask your help with,” the old man says, “Humans should not be able to take magic, in its purest form, from any magician of any kind. It should convert into energy that the body uses, usually as an accelerate when healing. However, he is somehow pulling the magic from Child without changing it into something he can use.”

“Wut,” Ghost growls, storming over to grab the frog from the witch and lifting him even higher, “Wut did y’ fuckin’ do?”

“Easy, Ghost,” Price tries to soothe, although it’s obvious that he’s not really trying. Honestly, Gaz doesn’t want Ghost calmed, not with the other man’s reaction.

“Capt’n, there’s only a handful ‘f ways f’r magic t’ be stolen. All ‘f them are dangerous t’ the magician ‘n’ illegal in 97% ‘f th’ world. This fuck’s in part of th’ 97%,” Ghost growls, looking like he’s about to slam the frog onto the ground.

“Killin’ ‘m in’nit gonna do shite, Si,” Soap pipes in, “It’s pro’ly gonna get mor’ magic pulled from Gaz’s bonnie.” Ghost hesitates before lowering his hand with a growl. The Austrian takes advantage of the lower height, leaping out of Ghost’s hand to flee to some corner of the room. Prometheus watches with disdain as his familiar hops off his shoulder, stalking the frog around the room.

“Loath as I am to ask, especially with your reaction,” Prometheus begins, “I am curious. How do you know there are such ways?” Ghost freezes, before slowly turning to glare at the old man.

“Fucker tried t’ use me t’ summon a demon,” he growls, “Needed magic from somewhere.” Gaz flinches at that confession, while Prometheus purses his lips. The old witch bows deeply to Ghost.

“I find I must apologize once again,” the old man offers, “For causing you pain, I offer a favor at your disposal.” Ghost clicks his tongue and turns away, focusing more on Soap, who had come over to comfort Ghost. Turning away to offer the couple some privacy, Prometheus requests to Price and Gaz, “I will need to ask that Kyle do a few things, nothing that will injure him, but must be done to entice their magic to want to Bond with him over the frog’s.”

“What’s ‘e need to do?” Price asks, crossing his arms while Gaz glances over at Ghost and Soap worriedly. Luckily, it seems that Ghost is calming down, so Gaz turns back to listen to Prometheus.

“He needs to soak with a few herbs. Basil, catnip, jasmine, lavender, red clover and sweetpea, specifically. It will enhance the natural attraction between soulmates, despite how it will smell,” Prometheus explains as both Gaz and Price wince at the thought of how he’ll smell after soaking. He assures them, “He only needs to soak in those herbs for ten minutes through the week. After soaking, he can shower it off, but it must be ten minutes at least.”

“Got it,” Gaz agrees easily. Prometheus pulls out a bracelet with alternating red crystals hanging from the silver chain.

“You will have to wear this as well,” the old witch instructs, “These are rubies and red fire quartz. It will help the attraction amplify to catch their magic enough to easily shift the Bond to you.”

“What about the Bond they already have with the bastard?” Price asks before there is a loud squishing sound. Spinning around, Gaz sees Ghost staring down at his boot, a cold look in his eye while Soap looks done with his boyfriend.

“Did you just step on the idiot and squish him?” Price asks with a groan.

“…Maybe,” Ghost says, dodging the question without being insubordinate.

“‘E did,” Soap immediately throws him under the bus. Gaz can’t help but snort as Ghost turns and pulls Soap into a headlock. Prometheus sighs and pulls out a small 4 ounce mason jar.

“Do not worry,” the witch assures them, idly unscrewing the mason jar’s lid, “I prepared for this.” As soon as the lid is removed, there’s a sudden sucking noise that makes all of the task force tense. He returns the lid on top of the jar, and a tiny looking König appears in the jar.

“Is that his soul?” Gaz asks, taking a step forward to get a better look. The now-tiny man flips him off, basically confirming that it is König’s soul.

“Unfortunately,” Prometheus sighs, “However, this will allow me to revive him instead of forcing my poor apprentice to do it and give up more magic to this useless walking piss stream.” Gaz chokes at that description, hearing Soap cackle gleefully while Ghost snorts. Price clears his throat, obviously fighting back his own laughter, before turning to the old man.

“Is there anything else you need us to do?” he asks, crossing his arms.

“Just have Kyle soak and keep the bracelet on for a week,” Prometheus instructs, glaring down at the jar before giving it a rather hard shake. The Austrian was likely cursing up a storm in that tiny jar, flopping all over the place. Once sure the bastard was properly abused, Prometheus flicks his fingers at the smear. The frog body is remade, but left empty as the old man scoops the body up.

“I will visit in one weeks time,” he declares, “Do as I say, and we shall be able to break the Bond your enemy has forced upon Child.”

“Got it,” Gaz acknowledges, watching as the old witch nods back and vanishes from the rec room with another burst of smoke. The task force stand in silence, mulling over the strange experience, but feeling lighter. This personal mission is almost done, the light at the end of the tunnel is near.

Poor Private Roach comes in and leaps in shock at the sight of the four of them with cruel grins on their faces.

[vanosslirious]

BBS Dialogue Prompts: #381

BBS & Frouse Prompts and Sentence Starters: [ 8 ]

SMII7Y

It's the same guy!

It's inside the car!

At least you get to live to do another one, until you successfully do it.

I'm excited for this round, boys.

That's the best way to play it, bro.

Are you trying to manifest this?

Shut up, bro, I'm gonna kiss you on the mouth!

That's seconds after you slapped me in the face.

How did that not hit you?

Guy's we're getting distracted, the true foe is winning!

I'm practically on fucking welfare right now, give me something.

These guys are struggling down here.

Did I just get hit by a rock, what the hell was that?

I think we should go in here.

You are dead, you are absolutely dead.

There's still so many of them.

I think from here, it only gets worse.

That's not the guy we need to fight.

Oh shit, he summoned minions.

You look so goofy when you're doing that.

ELASTICDROID

Alright, where's my hug at?

Feeling kinda peachy today.

Wait, where's my squad at?

I'm the most irrelevant one here, leave me alone!

Patience is a virtual.

Nope, I'm still in, bro.

You're all getting banned.

Fear him!

Wait, drinking and driving?!

Hell nah, I'd block ya from my real life.

BLARG

Hold up, I'm pretty sure these one's blow up.

Why did I follow the frog?

She never even loved you.

I'm the onset photographer.

It's okay, we'll live with it.

That's it, I'm playing my violin poorly.

Hold on, there's a fellow slug.

I'm gonna shoot it in the head for being a slug.

You guys are like wasps.

There's a frog here, who is this?

BIGPUFFER

Damn, motherfucker, you moved it out of the way.

Stop throwing shit!

I'll try to come find the phone, who else is up there, I saw someone…

I'm over the nail gun.

It has no ammo!

I know, I've noticed, I'm just trying to keep ya'll away from me.

I think we're both dead here.

What's the fucking point, dude?

My camera broke!

Okay, no need to yell at me!

TERRORISER

I'm sick and tired of it.

He's been here for twenty minutes.

I've been slow to get my shit to work.

Get your party hats!

Yeah, you need teammates.

You scared the shit out of me!

I was so close!

Yeah, can you see me flipping you off?

He was a chair.

You gotta admit, that was a good spot!

MOO

It's really not that good.

I got a key.

Don't vote for me

This is not riled up, this is me losing my will to live.

People believe you when you say that!

It's not believable, that's the thing.

I have so much free time.

We have to just survive!

Get out of the way.

Jump down.

NOGLA

No, that's too fucking noisy.

How did you get it working?

Do you guys think this is good enough to wedge the hole?

Dude, this just doesn't fucking fit right, man.

Are we all innocent, all four of us?

Stay in the dark, don't move.

Okay, I was just defending myself.

What I'm about to say, everyone should listen too.

This is a self-report, don't ask me why, I just know.

Just take the fucking L!

VANOSSGAMING

That's a weird looking cat.

Wrong spell, hold on!

No, you're a cat!

He's gonna show us something violent!

There's no match to bet on yet.

Don't you fucking lose it all again using it on the damn slot machines.

Am I hearing gunshots?

I keep thinking they're dying.

Are we there yet?

We must stop the drug train.

[engagemythrusters]

????? i literally never said that you’re infantilizing yourself . it’s just weird to see posts about autistic coded characters being UNABLE to be people in power all because they aren’t social like jesus christ

Ah, but you see, this is not at all what you said in your last ask. What you said was, and I quote, "stop fucking infantilising din djarin bc he's autistic coded! [...] it's weird how you're putting it out there that people with autism 'no like people uwu'" Which. Absolutely implies that you think people not liking being around people qualifies as being infantilised. But! Maybe that was unintentional. I'll grant you that.

So, instead, we will talk about infantilisation, and how my post was not even CLOSE to infantilisation.

To start with, we need to define infantilisation. I'll give a couple decent definitions from multiple sources, just so we can get a good picture.

1: "to treat as if infantile" (Merriam-Webster), with the definition of "infantile" being: " of or relating to infants or infancy" and "suitable to or characteristic of an infant" 2: "the prolonged treatment of one who is not a child, as though they are a child" (Wikipedia--not a great source to pull directly from, but reputable enough to get my point across) 3: "the action of prolonging or perpetuating a state of infancy" (Oxford Dictionary)

So, from this we can extrapolate that "infantalisation" means "treating a non-child like a child." Great! We know the word. But this means nothing if we don't know how would someone treat another person like a child. How do we treat a child? How would that treatment be demeaning?

There are multiple ways people reduce a child's personhood. There's the matter of cuteness, where people only see how sweet and adorable the children can be, and treat them as if a doll or a pet. Then there's how dependent children are, which can be easily manipulated by elders. And, similarly, children are often considered non-autonomous.

Okay. So now we've discussed what infantilisation is and how children are treated. Let's put it together. What are some examples of infantilisation?

Here's one: today I saw a video of a fairly attractive East Asian woman in a frog costume. She was embarrassed to be seen without the costume's hat. The many, many comments only addressed one thing: how adorable she is. How cute and sweet it is. How does this relate to infantilisation? This would be that first one--only seeing how doll-like children (and this lady) can be. There was no discussion about how "relatable" it is to be embarrassed about something, no discussion about why she was in a frog costume, not even a comment about why someone was videoing this in the first place (after all, she did not consent to this, and it was embarrassing to her!). There was not one single comment relating to her being a person. It was all gushing over her adorableness. Not attractiveness. Adorableness. Akin to the way someone would fawn over a cat. (This is a huge issue with how Westerners treat East Asians, by the way.)

Now, that subject isn't particularly relevant. So let's try another one, this time relating to Din Djarin.

In a hypothetical scenario, say someone said, "Din Djarin can't rule because it requires him to make all the decisions and he can't do that." This would, in most scenarios, be infantilising. This takes away his independence, making him rely on others. This makes him non-autonomous, unable to govern himself. BUT. This could also be interpreted another way. Certain autistic people--myself included--cannot always make decisions for themselves. I find it absolutley impossible to make some decisions sometimes. Deciding exactly where I want to sit to eat dinner can put me off of eating dinner at all if I can't figure out what I want. Not able to decide which type of food I need to buy makes me not buy any food at all. If I do not get outside help, I will severly impact my life.

So, there's two sides to that one. Maybe Din Djarin couldn't make decisions for himself (he can, but again, hypothetical). That would be just fine. Now, would it be great in a leadership position? No, not really. I wouldn't be able to be in a leadership position because of this. I need directions, very specific ones.

When does it become infantilisation, then? If lack of independence means just that someone needs help sometimes (or a lot of the time! or even all of the time!!), where's the line between "help" and "infantilisation?" The answer is: intent and generalisation.

In the case of intent, infantalisation (in this hypothetical scenario) is that "he should not be allowed to rule as Mand'alor because he is too stupid to make decisions for himself." This implies negotive connotations to the inability to make decisions always. Lack of intelligence is not inherently bad. Lack of decision-making skills is not inherently bad. Not being able to lead is not inherently bad. BUT when the implication is that all of these things ARE bad, that's when it becomes infantilisation. He can't do anything; thus, we consider him childish (and we consider children useless). The intent is to harm and demean. (Non-infantilisation--aka viewing him as the adult and person he is--would be saying "he shouldn't be Manda'lor because he needs help in a way that would be counterintuitive to himself" because it would be, in this hypothetical, detrimental to expect him to constantly decide. This is acknowleging his limits and respecting his boundaries. That's never, ever a bad thing.)

In the case of generalisation, infantilisation would be, "autistic people should never rule." This is based off stereotype. And, while stereotype does indeed come from the fact that some people DO fit that stereotype, we can all acknowledge and accept that treating every single person in one category as if they fit that is WRONG. So, to generalise that all autistic people cannot rule, even though some truly couldn't (people with high support needs do exist!! we low support need autistics can't ignore them in our conversations. they can't always add themselves to the conversations like we can), would be stripping every single autistic of their identity. Making everyone of any minority out to be the same is removing identity. Meaning, stripping them of their autonomy and personhood.

That's infantilisation.

Here is why my post is absolutely not infantilisation.

My post states that Din Djarin should not rule over all of Mandalore because he "literally wants nothing to do with people a good two-thirds of the time. Man likes his son and that’s about it." Does this "cutesify" him beyond acknowledging his personhood? Nope! Does this strip him of dependence, either in intent or generalisation? Nope! Does this remove his autonomy, again in either intent or generalisation? Nope!

I also said that "this guy fuckin loves his job and he’d get way fuckin agitated if he couldn’t shoot someone down every few days" which... definitely implies a lot of competency. That is completely the antithesis of infantilisation. So, cutesifying, stripping independence, removing autonomy? Definitely nope.

What I have said can be summed up, in a rather basic and nuance-less definition, is that Din Djarin is too much of a "lone-wolf" trope sort of guy to be governing people all the time. Aka. He would be tired of people. Aka. Need for independence. Aka. Autonomous. And like... where's cutsey in that?

And even the comment on "He’d end every day crying himself to sleep. Either that or staring at the ceiling so hard it collapses on him and he never has to get up again." Again. No cutsey. No dependency. No non-autonomy. The closest I can get to thinking how this would relate to infantilisation is that I said "cry" which is something children do indeed do. But so do adults. Everyone can cry. There's no age limit to crying. ESPECIALLY if you're mentally exhausted all of the time.

Maybe you think the tag "man is so full of autism" is generalisation? That one I guess I can see if you misinterpret it. And maybe you did! Messages can get mixed--I again grant you this. It was not intended to be a generalisation. It was, in fact, based on ME. MY autism. and how it can QUITE OFTEN look like how DIN DJARIN acts. I don't like being around people for very long. He doesn't seem to either. I can make a veeery detailed post on this (which would also literally elaborate further on what the original post said) but that is neither here nor there. You misunderstood. That's okay. Move on.

BUT. Now that we've cleared up there is NO INFANTILISATION IN MY POST, let's clarify what YOU think I said.

You think I said that "autistic people are unable to be in power." This is not what I said. We've just covered the entire post, so I think you can see where I did not, in any case, say this. I said Din Djarin would not want to be in power, because it would be awful for him. There's NOTHING about ability in there. I did not say he couldn't. Nowhere! Not once! He's a very capable man--which I did indeed connote later!

So. NOT ONCE DID I EVER INFANTILISE DIN DJARIN'S AUTISTIC-CODED, BESKAR'GAM-CLAD SELF.

What you have done is taken a well-founded opinion I have (which I am still fully willing to back up with canon proof) and twisted it up because You. Didn't. Agree.

You don't HAVE to agree with me. You can think he'd be well-off in that position. Good for you. We all deserve opinions.

But you do NOT get to throw "infantilisation" around at A DISABLED PERSON like a fucking buzzword just because YOU DID NOT AGREE.

Sit on this. Reflect. And next time you find something you don't agree with. Remember your literature classes, rather than making a baseless "call out" on anon on the fucking internet.

[ducknotinarow]

SF Raph - Have you ever ... felt like you'll never get Splinter back? uwu

| send my muse ‘have you evers’ and they have to answer truthfully!

When Raphael got tried of April fussing over him, he took off. Not that he could go to far even the fucking sewers, their territory wasn't in the clear to freely travel. So much felt taken away from them right now, Raphael felt as he stared up through at the sewer grate just above his head. Drops of rain water slowly dripped off the metal and landed into the puddle below it was creating. Raphael would love to sneak out to the surface right now. But the streets were over ran with mousers, foot ninjas, frogs and even rats. Just not the rat he wanted to see more than anything. It was one thing to take away his favorite thing to do. Sneak out to the roof tops. Just to run across them under the cover of night where he could freely move and feel the air against his scales.

Raphael could live with not being able to go to the roof tops for a time or the docks even. But did they have to take his dad too?

Raphael couldn't really stand even a minute without Splinter being home. Wearing that dumb apron happily showing off his favorite mug to everyone as if it was the first time they gifted the mug to him. Didn't matter how often Casey and April had seen it.

"No Casey?"

"I aint with him all the fuckin' time." Raphael gruffed in return when he heard Leo speak. The eldest soon took the space next to him giving him a look that clearly said 'really?' Which yeah, that was fair. Raphael and Casey were pretty much glued to the hip since Raphael found Casey in the sewers that first night.

"Didn' really feel 'ike hangin' with him." Leo moved to rest against the wall besides Raphael. A light tap of his elbow against Raphael's own. Had him look down at his feet a moment. "I can' say it round Don. Ya know how hard he's been workin' to figure everythin' out. Or Mikey either I swear if he ain't crackin' jokes how he been he'll break down." Raphael expressed, letting his gaze drift over to Leo.

This wasn't just a talk between brothers, but to his leader. Not something Raph was always good about acknowledging or even showing he saw when it came to Leo. But also as the two oldest of the four. Don and Mikey were the youngest sure they were trying to handle it keep it together as well but they kind of worked in similar ways. 'if I do this everything will be fine.'

"Are we ever gonna see Dad again?" Raphael finally voiced his doubts, "what we gonna do if we can'? Don's bearly holding it togetha' as is. Mikey so out in the clouds and..i'm" Raphael was only holding it together thanks to Casey and having battles to deal with. But, even he wasn't sure how much longer he could do that. "How are we gonna take care of them Leo? If we can't even get Splinter back?" Raph goes on to say it had all been weighing on him more than even he had thought.

"Every time we fight shred head. It get tougher and I think maybe jus' maybe it's finally the time we'll get him." Leo cut in finishing the thought of how they only get a trophy of one of their dad's belongings instead. "Yeah, Von's around now and 'hat helps Don out some. She helps with Mikey even." Leo nodded along sharing the same appreciations and worries.

"I ain't sayin' we wont get Dad back or to even stop tryin'-"

"I know Raph"

"just can't help thinking what we gonna do about them."

Leo just playfully elbowed Raphael "Now you know how I feel"

Raph just turned away ignoring Leo's laugh but still offered a smile none the less.

"They be okay cause they have brothers who worry about them." Leo finally says and it dose ease Raph's thought enough to get him to jab Leo back a little harder than needed but that just how it was.

[deadbydangit]

As I was about to write something else, I noticed two bunnies hopping along in my backyard and it gave me an idea for something else. Please enjoy!

When the Reader brings home an animal.

Deathslinger, Nightmare, Spirit, Trickster, Ghostface

Deathslinger

He would've been perfectly content just drinking in the bar with just you.

And it had been that way for a long time.

Till you came back one day hiding something in your shirt.

"Okay. I'll bite. What is it?"

He thought you were hiding a gift or something.

He wasn't expecting you to pull out a kitten.

"No."

No matter how much you plead and cry.

No, don't give him those puppy dog eyes.

No, you can't-

Ugh, he can stay the night.

Okay, only till he finds a good home.

Well... He's your cat now.

You walked in on him one day, speaking to someone.

"Alright Fluffy. Now I may be the man around here, but if I'm not around you gotta promise to protect them. Ya' here?"

The cat was on the bar table next to him, lapping up a bowl of water.

Talking to the kitty like they were old friends.

He doesn't really do the baby talk thing.

"I trust you. I know you love them as much as I do. So we have to work together."

Don't tell Caleb you saw that.

He'll totally deny it.

But if his little Fluffy catches a rat, he's going to put that cat on a pedestal.

He's super proud of his cat.

"Look at that Darlin'. We won't be having any pest problems."

Nightmare

No, stop. Stop right there.

You're trying to sneak something in. He can tell.

Empty your pockets....

Both of them!

A frog?

Where did you get a frog?

Whatever, no, you can't keep it.

No, don't look at him like that. The answer is no.

No. Seriously.

Augh! Fine! But he wants nothing to do with the damned thing.

It's your pet. Not his. He won't be taking care of it.

You started noticing books on frog care around the house.

"It's not good to give them water that hasn't been purified."

"You aren't feeding him enough."

"You can't touch them like that."

So much for it being all your pet.

He's basically taking over.

It's like he's taking the frog as his own child.

It's pretty cute to walk in and see Freddy having full conversations with the frog.

"So yeah, trials were pretty good today. That David asshole really got what was coming to him."

Don't remind him of the time when he didn't want the little critter.

Because he will firmly deny it.

Spirit

It's a toss up over who would be the first to bring an animal home.

You don't even have to try and sneak it in.

Is that a puppy?

And Rin is all over the dog.

Kisses, hugs, plans on what you'll need to get, and all the possible names!

She is a huge softy for animals, especially fluffy ones.

"Oh! Let's keep her!"

She's the type to bring any animal home and ask to keep them.

And the baby talk this girl can do.

"Who's my wittle pumpkin? Who's the cutest wittle baby ever? It's you! Mommy woves you. Yes she does."

She won't even care if you're in the room to witness this.

Hell, join her in spoiling the puppy.

And outfits, she has so many outfits for the dog.

You have no idea where they even came from.

You will never see that pup without something on.

Hair bows, bandanas, hats, sometimes even little shirts or dresses.

She will find matching clothes for the three of you.

Don't think this dog won't be the most spoiled thing ever.

Trickster

Are you hiding something from him?

You are!

What's this? You've been hiding a bunny in your closet?!

He doesn't really care that you've been hiding it.

He's upset that it might receive more attention than him.

Ji-Woon is the super jealous type.

So jealous that he'll be glaring at this rabbit whenever you're carrying it.

Whenever you say you're about to go feed your bunny or play with them, Ji-Woon refuses to let you go.

You should pay more attention to him.

You should only pay attention to him.

Isn't he enough?

He'll come around though.

If the bunny makes you that happy, then he'll tolerate it.

Just make sure to give both of them lots of attention.

Ghostface

He actually was the one to bring the animal in.

"Hey babe, check out what I found!"

That's a snake.

That... Is that safe?

"Don't worry. He's super chill, see?"

He will shove that snake in your face.

He seems to have really tamed this animal.

You're going to be the one taking care of the snake.

It's name is Hisses, apparently.

"Yeah, like kisses, but he hisses. So it's Hisses. Get it."

Being terrible at naming things aside.

Danny is really happy.

The way he shows off his darling snake.

"Hey Sally! Look!"

He really enjoys showing people who are or potentially are afraid of snakes.

That power he gets over them.

It's going to get him into a significant amount of trouble.

But he's just so happy, and who are you to take that happiness away from him.

[i-writes-things]

I am requesting specifically bc you said it was okay!!! I would DIE for a Wanda or a Natasha x teen sister reader where r just wants to do normal fun teen things but bc Wanda or nat hadn’t done anything like it when they were teens they like freak out over anythinggggg (being 5 mins off curfew or missing one lesson at school automatically means being kidnapped by a villainous organization ofc ofc) idk if that idea makes sense but I have many thoughts and a bad way of saying them so if it doesn’t then please tell me and I can fix it!!!! Love you appreciate you stan you and your works theyre my silly little comfort scenarios ur so important to me n the world OKAY BYE LY

FunDeadly? Detours...

Omg this is so sweet WHAT! Thank you very much! I appreciate you for supporting me! :)

Second addition in the MARVEL EVENT

We started light today. Tomorrow not so much...

"It's fine, they know where I am at all times anyway."

Joking around down the street with your backpack on you walk towards the arcade. And spend the afternoon there.

-

"JARVIS! Where is she?"

"Whom are you talking about?" His crackled from above. Like everyone assumes God would talk to them.

"Y/N! She- she said 3:15. That's when she would be home every day. By then I'll be snacking in the kitchen. That's what she said. I remember."

"Miss Y/n is currently at the MorrisHead Arcade."

"What?"

"You need some back up?" The red head walked in.

"Let's go! Jarvis, where at this place is she?" Her loud footsteps echoed down the hall, mirroring her fast heartbeat.

"In the back, near the concession stand."

"No one takes my little sister." Her red powers flared in her eyes as her and Natasha left to get Y/n back. Little did they know.

-

Beep boop beep bop boop boop beep

"Hahhahah!" You leaned back, laughing at your friend, who was pointing out an Avengers poster on the wall. The artist had given Steve more nose than face.

"I am so taking a picture." Peter started to pull out his phone and walked over as a guy behind the counter with a yellow and red striped hat, came up with two paper plates and the smell of good pizza.

"Order for Spiderman!" He said, sounding like an ex-surfs up dude.

You took the plates as you heard a girl with the same striped hat yell out for Iron Man's order, which made a group of kids race around you toward the concession.

"Hey Pete, do you think that Wanda and them get paid for all the advertising they get legitimately everywhere." He was giggling at his phone as you shoved his slice of pizza into his hands. You had to talk over all the screams. Little kid screams with pizza in your mouth and cheese not wanting to stop you turn your head toward the front. Peter gave you a look. His spider-sense.

"Wah?" You said.

"Eat your pizza and get ready to save the day." He stood and started to cautiously walk around. Wiping your hand from crusty pizza bits, Peter jumped onto the ceiling. Just his spidy mask on. You froze. You had made it into the spotlight, and it blasted into your dark adjusted eyes.

"Y/n!" You heard her voice the second she said anything.

"Natasha? What's going on?"

"Where the hell have you been?"

"What?"

"3:15? My ass!" Her voice turned into a shout.

"Put the gun away!" You whisper-yelled at her. "There's kids here, one, and two, what is going on?" You asked astonishingly confused.

"We came to..."

"To...? What?"

"To save you." Wanda finishes.

"Save me? From what? From King Kong? Or the Leap Frog? Or Wreck-It-Ralph? Maybe Mrs. Pac-Man was holding me hostage!" You were so stunned that they acted like everything was literally life or death.

"That's not funny."

"You could have died."

"How? I am 10x stronger than everyone here. Besides Peter."

"Peter's here?"

"Where is that spider monkey?" Natasha muttered, putting her gun away and realizing the laughter and safety of the place.

"Did you ask him yet-"

"Shhh! What are you talking about!"

"Ask Peter what?" Natasha took a step towards you.

"Nothing." You glared at Wanda.

"You want to ask Peter nothing?"

"Yes. Can we go?" You said.

"I want to try the Pac-Man game." She stepped up to it, getting her powers out and at the ready.

"Wands, no. Oh my gosh. This is gonna take forever..."

"Wait but what did you want to ask Peter?"

"Yeah?" Peter's high pitched voice came from the ceiling as she firstly was going to cheer Wanda on but also is wondering about Natasha's question.

"Aaaa! Peter you can't do that!"

"Do what?" He quickly flipped back on the ground, removing his mask and shaking his hair, like a scene from a movie.

"We're cheering Wanda on. Right. Right. Wanda go right. Not- You got it."

--

"Y/n!!!"

"What are you doing here?"

"Get out here now." Moving out of your seat, and having a pretty awkward walk to the hall as Natasha had told you off infront of everyone.

"Take me to Miss Jefferson. I want to know why she marked you absent," She checked her phone. "42 minutes ago."

"What? No. I have math class. I don't want to miss anything. It wasn't Miss J's fault."

"Oh?"

"Well..."

"Where were you then. Y/n?"

"Nowhere."

"That's not a place I've heard of."

"I skipped, okay!"

"You could have died!"

"Not everything I do is going to be an apocalyptic event."

-

@ravensinthedaylight @may-z3 @youre-a-total--poser @betzabobababi @book-place @scarthefangirl @darkstar225

[ellitx]

Beguilement | Albedo x Reader

Klee asks for Albedo’s help to make bombs with her.

word count: 2.9k

           “What are you doing?”

            Albedo peered at you from the corner of his eyes, raising an eyebrow why you were holding his cheek. His work ceased when he felt your warm hand touched his face, bringing down the papers on the desk.

            “What am I doing?” You echoed with a slight tilt of your head. “I’m checking if you’re okay. You’re overworking yourself again.” You sighed, placing your hands on your hips. 

            “I’m not.”

           He latched his gloved hand on yours and bring it down back to your side. “Hm…” Your [eye color] eyes had a tint of a doubtful frown as you pout. Seeing the Chief Alchemist stuck in his research lab worried you. It’s been a while since you’ve last seen him and that’s why you’re here today.

            He didn’t mind when you waltzed in suddenly while he was mixing different kinds of herbs. He knew you wouldn’t cause a ruckus inside considering how dangerous his and Sucrose’s works are.

            “Klee really wanted to play with you, you know.” You started and took a sit on a nearby chair in his workshop. 

            “And so are you.” He placed back the various types of equipment to their rightful place and chuckled when he noticed your cheeks reddened. 

            “I—!”

            “Albedo!!” The door slammed open surprising the two teens. The said male felt someone glomped onto his leg. He looked down and saw the Spark Knight wrapped her little arms on his leg so tightly, her ruby eyes scintillating so brightly that was donned with a big grin.

            “I saw the sign wasn’t in your door anymore!! Does that mean you’ll play with Klee?!”

            Albedo rested his hand on the top of her head but threw a confused glimpse at her. He’s a hundred percent sure last time he checked, the “Experiment in Progress” sign was still hanging to let everyone know he’s busy.

            His aquamarine eyes landed on you who was innocently reading his notes, awing at his written discoveries and sketches of a place you've never seen before. His fingers pinched the bridge of his nose, heaving a sigh. The Kreideprinz knelt down before Klee and ruffled her big red hat whose eyes were bright as the sun and smile so innocent.

            “Yes. My research is almost done so might as well take a break.”

            Your ears perked up at his words and lifted your head away from the notebook. “If that’s so, then I wanna make more bombs with you!!” The child tugged his lab coat and pulled him to the table, laying her hefty backpack on the chair. 

            She let out her collection of bombs to the Chief Alchemist and stretched her arms to showcase her invention. “Ta-da!! I tried to make a different Jumpty Dumpty!” Albedo placed his fingers on his chin as he inspected the object.

            You peered over his shoulder and eyes glimmered admiring the cute little red bunny device. “Woah!! This one seems different from your usual Jumpty Dumpty, Klee!” You leaned against him to get a closer look. 

            The blonde child giggled but let out a yelp when she felt that her feet weren’t touching the ground. Her small hands were now laying on your shoulder as you carry her small stature in your arms.

            The Alchemist’s focus was now on the timer hidden behind Jumpty Dumpty, surprising him. “It’s dangerous if we keep the bombs here. How about we go to Stormterror’s Lair to test it out?” His suggestion made the two girls looked at him with sparkling eyes and nodded eagerly.

            You put down Klee and helped her pack her stuff back inside her backpack. Both of you were chanting happily making the corner of his lips tugged upwards at the adorable scene. 

            “Well then,” He said, taking their attention. “Let’s get going.”

            Before Master Jean scolds us. He said to himself, sweat dropping.

            Both of you threw your arms in the air to cheer. Before you head off, you hung the strap of Klee’s bag on your shoulder and patiently waited for her to come to your side. She clutched your hand a bit tightly but one that won’t hurt you.

            Albedo took his own satchel and kept his notebook and some other materials needed in their experiment. He left a little note for Sucrose, letting her know he’ll be away for a while in case she goes looking for him. 

            Once he was ready, the two girls were already outside the room sticking around until he appears. Klee beamed in delight and grabbed his hand tugging both of you together. She was in the middle while you and Albedo were by her side.

            She started humming joyfully and marched towards the exit. 

            “Klee, Albedo, [Name], and Dodoco are off to Stormterror’s Lair!!” You chuckled at her cute declaration whilst she swung both of yours and Albedo’s arms, sauntering to the old ruins to do the experiments.

  —

             “We can try using flaming flower stamen.”

            “Oh, you mean those burning flowers?”

            Albedo nodded as he tinkered with the Jumpty Dumpties, and letting out the contents carefully on the cloth. 

            “There are few scattered around here, so it’ll be no problem for us to find one.” He lifted up his goggles, placing them atop of his head. 

            “Oh! Klee knows all the locations!!” The said girl jumped from her sitting position, raising her hand like how a student wants to be called by their teacher. “There are few around the lair and some almost at the end!”

            “Waaah!! That’s Klee for you!!” You praised her as you pat her head fondly. She giggled hearing your flattery and clasped your hand with hers. “I’ll go look with big sis [Name]!”

            “Ah, wait—!” But before the Chalk Prince can stop them, both of you were already running carelessly in search of the flaming flowers. He sighed in defeat and continued tinkering with the gadgets.

            Not even a minute later, he heard a loud KABOOM and the cries of the hilichurls in the distance. Several monsters flew in the air and slowly dropped onto the ground while some slimes were running for their lives.

            Thank goodness your vision wasn’t Electro or else the elemental reactions between yours and Klee’s attacks will cause massive damage to the ancient city.

            Sighing for the umpteenth time, his focus went back on dabbling with the bomb, pretending he wasn’t involved with their mischievousness.

  —

             “Oh! We should bring some bone samples for Sucrose for her research!” You exclaimed, watching the hilichurls’ bodies disintegrate in the thin air. You picked up the arrowheads and some horns from the ground left by the monsters.

            “Klee will gladly help big sis!” Your shoulders shake with laughter and ruffled her hair. “And I’ll happily accept your offer~”

            “I think she’ll accept anything as long as their bones, right? I did see some of her collections…” You muttered to yourself as you looked around the area to find anything interesting. 

            “Does fish blasting work as well to find bones?” Klee questioned innocently whilst holding her Jumpty Dumpties in her hands ready to throw them away. “No, Klee. Fish blasting is not good. If Master Jean caught us, you’ll be confined again!”

            “B-but… I’m sorry… Please don’t get mad at Klee.” She clamped her hands behind her back, eyes cast downwards turning glossy. Your heartstrings tugged and felt like an arrow pierce right through you, immediately feeling guilty at your words. 

            “Ah… Klee, I’m not mad! I was… I was worried about you, that’s all.” You raised her and carried the little girl between your arms and nuzzled your noses together. Her ruby eyes brightened up and giggled, slithering her arms around your neck to hug closer.

            “I can’t bring myself to get angry at you and Dodoco! I cherish both of you!” 

                      “Is big sis [Name] saying she loves me and Dodoco?” 

            “Absolutely!” You puffed your chest like a proud mom and rested one hand on your hips.

            “Klee and Dodoco love you too!!” 

            The two of you shared a few laughter and wholesome moment. From the corner of your eyes, a camp of hilichurls spotted you both, ready to attack. You shared a glance with the Spark Knight then smiled, sharing the same ideas. 

            “Hilichurl bones would be a good sample for Sucrose’s research!”

  —

             The Chief Alchemist was busy gathering glands from the frogs, carefully extracting the mucous from them. Others would be grossed out seeing this, but for him— it’s almost like an everyday habit for him to perform this.

            He became inquisitive and wondered where you and Klee are. You were just going to gather a few flaming flower stamens, why are you taking so long? 

            Too distracted from his concern for your state as well as Klee’s, he didn’t notice a figure creeping behind him. Albedo’s perception then blackened and a shiver ran down his spine when he felt something blew on his ears and whispered. 

            “Guess who’s back?”

            His fingers wrapped around your wrist and gently pulled down your hand back to your side. His eyes were met with your own [eye color] gems as you smiled down at him. 

            “You’re finally back.”

            “Bzz! Wrong!” Your arms formed an X, indicating his incorrect answer. The Chief Alchemist snorted at your childish antics, failing to see the Pyro-vision user jumped on him.

            “Albedo, Albedo!! We brought the flaming flowers! Oh, and we also got these!!” The child poured out all the contents inside her bag and showed them to him like she won the biggest prize. Various materials were scattered all over the ground; masks, horns, arrowheads, scrolls, and a bone…?

            “So that’s why both of you haven’t come back for a while.” He observed the items gathered together and nodded to himself. He didn’t dare questioned them what and why were there cartilages included. 

            His eyes caught onto the flaming flower stamen. The cores were still emitting heat even though it was already extinguished. This can be a good time to create a flaming essential oil. The needed ingredients were already here, all he needed to do was to create it using alchemy.

            Good thing they don’t need to come back to Mondstadt just to make a simple potion, as long as the Chief Alchemist is with you, he can create anything. He put out a portable alchemic table— one of his inventions— and commenced to perform his alchemy.

            You and Klee watched him crushed the stamen until it turned to small particles. He then poured the extracted frog’s gland and mixed it together. The scent was odd and strong making you almost puke. How in the world can this man handle the smell?!

            Klee almost looked like she was about to faint as she held on to your coat to maintain balance. Albedo apologized and told you you can take the mint grass inside his satchel to get rid of the smell. 

            Wow, he’s already prepared…

            It brought a smile to your face at the thought of it. You rummaged inside his bag and saw the mints were kept inside the ziplock pouch. You motioned for the little girl to come with you, straying away from the Kreideprinz’s works as to not ruin it, and opened the pouch letting the cool smell waft around you.

            You both breathed a sigh at the refreshing air, forgetting the awful smell that lingered inside you minutes ago. Albedo was already done making the essential oil and attentively spewed the liquid in one of Klee’s bombs.

            A small smoke emitted from it and he cautiously set the cover back to its place. 

            “Is it done?” You asked. The male shook his head and threw the device at an empty area to see the result. He told you to stay back as he used his geo skill to cast a shield to all of you. A sound of a clock ticking can be heard from it and the three of you patiently waited for the outcome yet nothing happened.

            “Did it fail…?” Your question was answered when you sensed the ground shook and a massive outburst greeted your view. Your mouth gaped open in shock and awe, watching many sparks flew in the air almost resembling fireworks during Ludi Harpastum Festival.

            Klee was the one who’s more amazed than you, her eyes wide open and crimson orbs sparkling in admiration at the tremendous explosion. 

            “Waah!! Klee has never created a big kaboom like this in her entire life!!” She faced Albedo and tugged his coat repeatedly. “Can you please teach Klee how to make that? Please please please pleeease with a cherry on top?”

            The male furrowed his brows, slightly troubled whether he should accept it or not. He was quiet for a while, still contemplating his decision. His eyes darted to where you were standing to ask for help but when he turned around, you were gone. 

            In his rear vision, he noticed you used your elemental skill to stamped out the burning grass. His face paled and heart raced when you knelt down and slowly approached the small remains from the bomb to touch it.

            Albedo immediately dashed towards you and extended his arm to reach for you. He screamed your name so loudly surprising you. You felt your hand heating up and your instincts kicked in telling you to run away, but even if you do so, a bright light has already blinded your eyes and ears ringing from the loudness of the bomb’s blast.

  —

             “What are you doing?”

            You peered at the male from the corner of your eyes, raising an eyebrow why he was holding your cheek. Your hands stopped midway from the plate when you felt his warm hand touched your face, bringing down the spoon on the table.

            “What am I doing?” He echoed with a slight tilt of his head. “I’m checking if you’re okay. Your face is red again.” He sighed and took out a thermometer to check the reading. 

            “I’m not!” 

            You latched your hand on his and bring it down back to his side. “Hm…” His turquoise eyes had a tint of a doubtful frown as he sighed. For some reason, this brought a sense of deja vu to him.

            Your behavior was odd after the explosion incident. You’ve been so cold towards him, making him slightly worried. He knows it was his fault that caused you like this, but he didn’t expect you’ve been so hostile to him these past few days.

            It’s like a sudden switch of personality.

            Every time he checks up on you, you just puffed your cheeks and turn your head. He asked the other Knights of Favonius about your condition and all they said was you were perfectly fine.

            How is this perfectly fine?!

            “[Name]!!” The door slammed open surprising the two teens. The said female felt someone jumped onto her bed, making her stomach hurt at the sudden weight. “Klee is so worried about big sis! When I heard you were sick, Dodoco and I were going to give you gifts! Klee thought you were fine yesterday. Diona even said she saw you going to the plaza—“

            “A-Ah— you and Dodoco brought me gifts? That’s so sweet of you! Ahaha..” Your nervous chuckle made the Chief Alchemist raised his brow at you in suspicion. You were fidgeting underneath the bedsheets and avoiding not looking at him in the eye.

            “Klee, what did Diona said about [Name]?” The girl’s attention went to him before she could rummage inside her bag. “She said that she saw big sis walking around the plaza!”

            “K-Klee!!” Your face flushed even more than before. You were stammering so much and you felt like the world was spinning around. 

            Albedo wanted to confirm his suspicions, and so he kept on pushing questions at the little girl, ignoring your attempts to shush him.

            “What kind of gifts are you going to give to her?”

            His question quickly made you sat up and threw your pillow to his face. “Th-that’s none of your concern!! It’s something private okay?!”

            “[Name] told me if I can give her the bombs you made to me. I tried to copy what you did and she seems satisfied with it!”

            Your hands were flailing in the air, not knowing whether you should continue pressing the pillow on Albedo’s face or to cover your face in embarrassment. You didn’t want to clasp your hands on Klee’s mouth to silence her, she might get hurt from your sudden actions!

            Bombs? What is she going to do with those?

            He snapped out from his train of thoughts then eyed you conscientiously. His brain connected the pieces of information together. The heat from your body, the smell of the mint grasses, and a faint of ash from it made sense. Especially how your body temperature dropped all of a sudden.

            He grabbed your wrist and intertwined your fingers together as he pressed his forehead with yours. The close proximity between you two made your head go blank and your attention was solely on his eyes, mesmerized by their colors.

            Klee naively looked at you two with a curious gaze.

            Your body heat skyrocketed and your lips quavered after his words reached your ears.

            “You know, you could’ve just told me you wanted me to take care of you instead of putting an effort to do this.”

            Your shoulders shook in aggravation and embarrassment, smothering him with the pillows to shut him up.

            “I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you!!!”

            Albedo just let your antics be, not bothered by the fact you’re slapping the pillow on him each word escaped from your lips. 

         His lips tugged upwards thinking he caught your trickeries once again.

 reader was pretending she's sick just so he can take care of her lol           

[dumdumsun]

The Loveliest Lies of All

A/N: Accidentally made this the longest chapter in the entire story. Oops ❤️

Warnings: slight violence

Word Count: 5282

—————————————

Chapter Three: Schooltown Follies

“I don’t know who she is or how she is, or when or why she is

But as for where she is, she is where we will go

To Adelaide, to Adelaide

Come on and join the Adelaide Parade-”

“No-”

“Adelaide, to Adelaide

Let’s go to Adelaide’s house…”

Greg’s joyful marching melted into a simple walk at the flat ending of his song, glancing up at Scout with raised brows. “I need to fix that last part, but that’s the idea.”

“Yeah, of course.” Scout chuckled.

“So,” He pointed to each person as he addressed them. “Beatrice, you sing the high part. Wirt, you sing the really high part.”

Wirt raised a brow. “What?”

“And Scout will direct us.”

Scout hummed with squinted eyes. “Conduct.”

“Scout will conduct us. And-”

Beatrice sighed irritably, causing Scout to frown in confusion. “No one is singing anything anymore. And Wirt, keep moving.”

The group turned to said teen, who had stopped a few paces away to kneel down, tying the laces of his mismatched shoes. “But I-I have to- ugh. Alright…” He stood to his feet defeatedly and joined them again.

“But we have to do something fun.” Greg insisted.

“You know, we really don’t,” Beatrice shrugged. “We can just keep walking silently, you know? And- ugh. Wirt, let’s go! Come on!”

Wirt stood to his feet again. “Sorry, sorry!”

Scout’s irritation towards their winged companion only seemed to grow the more she watched Beatrice push her friends around. Personally, she was not a fan of Debby Downers, and Beatrice happened to be the downest Debby she’d ever met in a short amount of time. Greg tried to insist on the group having fun on their journey yet again, but the bird cut him off. “Greg, don’t you wanna be more like your brother? Just always doing what you’re told-”

“Huh-”

“Just a pathetic pushover who relies on others to make all his decisions?”

“Hey! What?! I’m not a pushover.”

“Hold on, Wirt. Let me get to my point.”

Wirt scoffed, unsuspecting. “Fine.”

“See, Greg? No willpower whatsoever.”

Embarrassed to have been so gullible, Wirt turned forward with a huff. Scout sighed and moved closer to the boy’s side. “Greg, don’t listen to her. I think it’s important you have fun on this journey,” Her eyes then snapped up to Beatrice. “And you shouldn’t discourage a child like that.”

Beatrice rolled her eyes. “He needs to learn from a young age that he can’t be like… this forever.”

“Like what? Like a normal, sweet, loving kid? A-And what do you even know about kids, huh?”

“What do you know about kids?”

“I know enough.” Scout crossed her arms and turned her head forward.

Sighing, Beatrice flew to the boy’s other side. “The world is a miserable place, Greg. I know it doesn’t sound fun, but life isn’t fun.”

Exhaling deeply, Greg frowned sadly. “Then I’ll do what I need to do, I guess…”

As Beatrice continued on whatever negativities she had focused so intently on, Scout felt a tug at her jacket. Glancing down, she saw Greg standing still, holding the tea kettle on his head, his frog lounging on top. Slowing her pace to a stop, she quietly joined him. “Greg? What’s wrong, bud?”

He grinned and took one hand off his “hat”, slipping his fingers between hers and leading them through an opening within the woods. “We need to do our part to make the world a better place!”

“We couldn’t have at least told Wirt? He’ll be worried about you.” She glanced over her shoulder, Wirt’s figure growing smaller the farther they ran. Greg hummed before shrugging.

“Wirt trusts you, right? He knows we’re in the best hands in the whole world.”

“Oh? You mean these hands?!” Scout mischievously grinned and scooped him into her arms, huffing as she struggled to keep the giggling boy up. Perhaps she had underestimated his weight. It had been awhile since she’d carried him.

Greg cackled, holding his frog close to his chest before his eyes caught something in the distance. “Whoa! What’s that?” He pointed forward. Scout’s laughter quieted as they reached a clearing. Stepping out of the shadowed wood, she moved closer to the small red house, a giant bell hanging above it to alert those around of the time.

“Ah, this, Greg, is a schoolhouse. The oldest of these date back to-”

“School?!” He scoffed. “Not today!”

Scout chuckled and set him down on his feet. “Well, I think we should check it out. If you hate school that much, go find a log to sit on and wait for me.”

“Yes, sir!”

He saluted before scampering off. She watched him for just a second to make sure he hadn’t tripped and fallen before turning back to the schoolhouse. From where they had just come from, she could hear Wirt’s calls. “Greg! Scout! Greg?!”

“Over here!” She called back, smiling softly as he and Beatrice emerged from the darkness. She pointed off to the side as they approached her. “Hey, so Greg went that way to find a place to wait. He’ll be fine. But I do wanna check out this place. You know, maybe find someone else to help us sooner than some rando lady with supposed powers?”

Scout ignored the glare Beatrice sent her way. Wirt only blinked at her, so she continued. “Anyway, we only need one person to go in. Which one of us should go inside and who should stay with Greg?”

Yet again, she received no response, just a blank stare from her friend. Glancing between him and the bird, the latter only shrugging, Scout rapidly blinked. “What is this? Why are you staring at me like that? Is this a game?”

…..

“Okay, Greg will be fine. Let’s both go.” She threw her hands up in the air before spinning on her heel and leading them up to the schoolhouse. “But you’re gonna need to talk soon.”

As if that had flipped a switch, Wirt nodded and strode to her side. “Right. Okay.”

Scout widened her eyes at him as they stood in the opened doorway of the house. Tearing her gaze from him, she settled it on the room inside. Standing in front of a blackboard decorated with delicate and cursive calligraphy was presumably the teacher, her cheeks red and rosy and the nest of chocolate brown hair was put into a bun at the top of her head. She looked something straight out of a children’s book. Before her was the… class.

They were animals. Literal animals in school clothes. Cats, bunnies, pigs, dogs, the likes, all dressed as 1800’s school students. In fact, Scout observed, every stop they made felt as if they had travelled two hundred years back. The attire, the lack of technology, the use of language. It was all a dead giveaway.

“Excuse me?” The teacher softly called. “Please, take your seat, children. You’re late. You know the rules, ‘Once the bell has rung, class has begun’.” She gestured to the saying on the board.

Beatrice snickered. “Oh, sorry, everybody. Sorry. No, this boy doesn’t have a brain. He can’t learn anything. Let’s go, Wirt. Come on! Here, boy!” She called and whistled to Wirt as if he were a dog. Scout fumed at the nerve of this bird, opening her mouth to tell her off before Wirt spoke up for himself.

“What? Did you say something? I can’t hear you because I’m too busy doing what I’m told.” He shrugged before walking into the room, taking a seat at one of the desks.

“Atta boy, Wirt.” Scout chuckled and took the seat beside him.

Beatrice hurriedly flew over to him. “What? What are you- No, no. Let’s go.”

“Oh, no. See, I’m a pushover, remember? I have to do what she tells me to do.” He shrugged. Beatrice widened her eyes and turned to Scout.

“Hello?! Knock some sense into his conehead!”

Scout quietly shushed her, her amused smile directed forward at the blackboard. “I’m trying to focus on class.”

“Wirt, your brother could be… in trouble somewhere!”

Tapping on the window just beside Wirt gained the trio’s attention. Greg stood outside, as happy as can be, waving at them with a smile. Then, in a mocking manner, he pointed to each “student” in the room before giving a thumbs-down. Scout lovingly shook her head as he giddily ran after his croaking frog, cheering and whooping as he went. Beatrice let out a deep and long sigh. “Bluebirds have a short lifespan. You three are literally killing me every moment I’m forced to spend with you.”

Scout quietly laughed when Wirt simply let out an “oh”.

“Young man,” The teacher sternly started. “I will not stand for such nonsense in my class room,” A shadow casted over her face as her expression turned gloomy. “I got enough nonsense from that no good, two-timing, low-down handsome man of mine! Oh, Jimmy Brown, why did you have to leave me so-”

Wirt and Scout glanced at each other as if to ask if this were actually happening.

“-And now with my father threatening to close the school and that wild gorilla on the loose, why, Jimmy, I just have one thing to say…”

What they hadn’t expected was for her to turn around with a bright smile and begin singing,

“‘A’ is for the apple that he gave to me, but I found a worm inside.”

Beatrice didn’t bother lowering her voice, “Ouf, that lady’s got some baggage.”

“What’s that?” The woman abruptly stopped her singing and pointed to a slim and tall box with one small opening in the corner of the room. “Young man, go to the dunce box!”

“Oh,” Wirt glanced down before standing to his feet. “Sure, okay! Sure!”

Scout watched her friend hum to himself as he situated himself into the box, closing the door to seal himself in. She furrowed her brows as Beatrice facepalmed. “And you’re not gonna stop him?!”

“No, he can do what he wants,” Scout shrugged. “This lady’s no help, anyway, so I’ll wait until he’s done here.”

“Now, where were we? Oh, yes- ‘G’ is for the gentleman I thought he was, when he first said ‘hi’-”

The young girl stood from the desk. “I’ll just wait outside. Tell me when the dunce is released or whatever.”

“Wait!” The bluebird called out. “Don’t leave me here with him!”

-------------------------------------------------

Greg and his frog found themselves amongst a racoon, a possum and a deer, all dressed in tattered clothing. Some of them were missing buttons, they had badly stitched patches, and their clothing was either baggy or too tight on them. They looked the part of unschooled street rats -- street… animals, and Greg had befriended them almost immediately. Currently, they were all sitting on a log, just as Scout had asked of him, as the boy rambled on and on to the verbally unresponsive animals. “So, my theory is hot dogs are not actually dogs, regardless of what they teach you in school. But you guys don’t go to school, huh? I’m gonna stick with you guys.” He whispered, laughing when his racoon friend picked up a black turtle and chucked it into the nearby pond.

“Hey, you found a log!” The voice of Scout caused Greg to perk up and crane his neck. The two shared a grin as she joined the group on the log, hesitating slightly upon noticing the company. “Who… are these guys?”

“Scout! These are my new friends!” The boy turned to the animals and gestured to her. “Gentlemen, this is Scout. She’s probably the smartest person in the world. Who needs school when you have Scout, huh?”

She snorted and set a hand atop his hat. “What is this, the Anti-School Club?”

“Huh… Yeah! That’s a great club name! Good job, Scout! And as founder of the ASC, I elect you president.”

“What an honor.”

“So, Ms President, what is your first order of business?”

Scout hummed in thought as she kicked her feet back and forth, tilting her head up to the bright blue sky. “Well, Ms Langtree is still singing her sorrows away, and Wirt is still being a dunce… So, I guess we just kill some time until he’s done.”

Greg nodded in satisfaction and snapped his fingers. “Perfect. And I know just the way to spend our killing time,” He hopped off of the log with a smile. “We play ‘Two Old Cat’! Me and Scout came up with it last year. It’s the best game ever created! Do you guys know how to play ‘Two Old Cat’?”

When the raccoon only blinked in response, Greg pulled Scout with him to a bush. “It’s fun. We’ll show you.”

“Be careful.” She warned and crouched down to help him carefully pull out a scraggly brown cat, surely blind in one eye. It meowed as the boy gently petted its dirty fur. Standing straight, she walked over to a tree and leaned against it to rest her throbbing leg.

A weak meow had her turning her head in the direction of the deer that had just picked up another cat. This one wore reading glasses and clutched a small walking cane in one of its paws. Greg frowned at this. “Wait. No. I think that cat is too old. What do you think, Scout?”

“Hm… Yeah, he’s too old. But we should at least feed the poor thing-”

“Hey! I think there’s one behind you!”

Scout twisted her body to peer into a bush behind her. She spotted a heap of dark black fur that rose and fell with raspy breathing. A pit formed in her stomach as she cautiously reached her hand into the bush. Just as her fingertips brushed the fur, the figure shot up to reveal itself as a gorilla. A pathetic roar sounded past its sharp teeth, yellow eyes staring into hers. Scout frightfully screamed and scrambled to her feet.

“Gorilla!” Greg waved his arms before he was being pushed forward by his friend.

“Go! Run!” She ordered, quickly leading Greg and the animals away from the gorilla that now began to chase them. “Keep going this way! I’ll distract it!”

Greg gasped. “Scout, no-”

“Just go! Go!”

The small group ran towards the schoolhouse, Scout huffing out a breath before turning back to the incoming gorilla. “Hey, ya big dummy! Come and get me!” She waved her arms wildly, darting off in the opposite direction of the schoolhouse. The gorilla growled quizzically before rushing after her. Despite the hot pain in her thigh, spreading past her knee, Scout managed to reach a tree, wrapping her arms and legs around it. She used her feet to hoist herself up, grabbing onto branches to pull her body farther up the tree. She cried out in shock when she felt a tug at her shoe.

Whipping her head around, she saw the gorilla trying to pull her off. Using her free leg, the injured one, she brought her knee close and then kicked her foot out, slamming it into the gorilla’s head and causing him to stumble back.

The tolling of a bell rang from above. Scout sat upon one of the branches and tilted her chin up to see Greg and the animals in the bell tower, swaying back and forth on the bell they desperately clung to. Her heart dropped at the sight. “What the- Greg! Get down from there now! S-Safely! Get down safely right now!”

Noticing the bell tower gang, the gorilla roared again and charged its way in their direction.

“No!” Scout wailed, quietly cursing to herself as she attempted to climb down the tree. Her uninjured leg slipped off the branch, eliciting a yelp from her as she clung to the wood, since her life quite possibly depended on it. “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.”

“Scout!” She heard Greg call. Tilting her head back, her upside-down vision saw the gorilla chasing them towards the tree she dangled from. “We’re here! We’re here!”

“What the heck is even going on?!” She shouted as the gorilla rounded the tree over and over in the chase. Scout closed her eyes and inwardly wondered for a second if she were living in a cartoon at this point. Her body instinctively flinched when she felt scratching at her shin. It was the possum, holding a large, thick stick in his tiny hands. “Uh- hey. C-Can you help me?”

He blinked and stood on his hind legs, demonstrating a few swings with the stick before pointing down to the gorilla below them. Her eyes widened in realization. “O-Oh, you want me to knock him out?”

He nodded.

“Okay.” She let him slip the stick into one of her hands. Very quietly muttering to herself, she allowed her arm to leave the branch and dangle just above the gorilla’s head. Each time it ran near her, she would take a swing, but miserably miss just by an inch. Swing after swing, she let out little grunts and curses when she missed.

Sighing irritably, she moved her eyes up to the possum, who stared at her in exasperation. As if the solution were obvious, it used both its hands to demonstrate a very harsh swing, stumbling around to mock the gorilla. Inhaling deeply, she reared her arm towards her chest before bringing down the branch and connecting it with the gorilla’s head.

“Aah!” He groaned before falling to the ground, unmoving. Greg peeked from behind the tree and grinned up at her.

“Scout! You did it!”

She blinked. “I did… Hey! I did it! I did it- Aah!” She cried out when the branch broke from the tree, Scout letting go out of shock and barreling to the ground. When she landed on her back, the air was knocked out of her, forcing a choked gasp from her chest. She groaned in pain and rolled onto her side, her entire body pulsing in pain. She could hardly hear the hurried footsteps over the ringing in her head.

“Are you okay?! Scout?! Did you knock out all your memories and give yourself amnesia?!”

“Ugh… W-What…?” She rasped and let Greg help her stand. He watched carefully as she stumbled forward, holding onto the tree for support.

“Come on,” He put a hand on her back and handed the top hat to her. “We gotta go.”

After leading the group into the school and past Ms Langtree to the dining area, Greg slowly sat Scout at the picnic table beside Wirt. The teen frowned worriedly at his friend as she groaned. “Greg? What happened to Scout?”

The boy peered up at his brother. “She fell out of a tree after knocking out the gorilla.”

“She what?!”

“Are you okay?!” Beatrice widened her eyes.

“She’s like a superhero. But now she needs rest. I think she might have gotten amnesia. Oh! That means we need to remind her of all our good times, Wirt! Good times!”

Wirt gingerly touched the back of her head, flinching when she hissed in pain. “I-I-I-I’m sorry. D-Does it hurt? I mean- I mean… uh-”

“I’m okay,” She whispered, placing her top hat on her head. “I think I just need to rest…”

“Yeah! Get your energy! You’re gonna need a lot of it for the trip down memory lane!” Greg scooped a spoonful of mashed potatoes and shoveled it into her mouth. Scout cringed at the bland tastelessness of it and took a sip of water. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s very bland. No taste.”

Greg hummed and assessed the room around him, watching the dismal and cheerless expressions of the animal students as they brooded over their plates of potatoes. He gasped when his eyes caught an object on the piano Ms Langtree currently played a melancholy tune on, no doubt feeding into the somber mood.

Wirt hardly noticed his brother shuffle away from the table as he picked up his spoon. “It can’t be that bland, can it?”

“Hey, nobody ordered you to eat yet.” Beatrice cut in.

“Yeah, but… Hm.”

Scout raised a brow at the pair. “Wirt, eat your bland potatoes.”

He sent a grateful smile her way. “Sure.”

Beatrice rolled her eyes. “You’re no fun…” She mumbled, scrunching up her beak at the forced smile Scout gave her. The trio jumped at the sound of wild, clashing, tuneless notes on the piano coming from Greg. Ms Langtree softly smiled and took over, playing a much more pleasant swing song. Greg’s face dropped his smile for a beat before giving a thumbs-up and climbing on a chair to grab the container of molasses. Bouncing to the beat of the song, he began to sing.

“Oh, potatoes and molasses

If you want some, oh just ask us

They’re warm and soft like puppies and socks

Filled with cream and candy rocks!”

As he sang, he pranced around the room, adding just a bit of molasses to each plate to add a bit more cheer to everyone’s hearts.

“Oh, potatoes and molasses

They’re so much sweeter than algebra class

If your stomach is grumblin’ and your mouth starts mumblin’

There’s only one thing to keep your brain from crumblin’!

Oh, potatoes and molasses

If you can’t see ‘em, put on your glasses

They’re shiny and large like a fisherman’s barge

You know you eat enough when you start seein’ stars!”

Absentmindedly, Scout tapped her spoon against her glass to the beat of the song. A wide smile spread across her face when she noticed Wirt doing the same. And as if on cue, the animals all joined in the song with their instruments. The sight and sound of this made Scout feel at home. Music was her life and band was a great part of it.

“Oh, potatoes and molasses

It’s the only thing left on your task list

They’re short and stout to make everyone shout

For potatoes and molasses!

For potatoes and-”

“That’s enough!”

The door to the dining area burst open along with the booming voice. In the doorway was a tall figure, decked out in a large black trench coat and top hat, much shinier than Scout’s. His pale skin complexion stood out against his all-black attire. His greying hair peeked from under his hat, his dark eyes were hidden behind his circular prescription glasses, and his thick lips were curled into an upset frown. “Is this what I’ve been paying for?!”

“Hey!” Greg defended from where he stood on the table. “We just wanted to have a little fun.”

“I didn’t invest in this school to have fun,” He then marched over to Ms Langtree, who cowered under his scorn. “I thought we were trying to do important work here, teaching animals to count and spell.”

“We are!” Ms Langtree whined. “Oh, please, Father, don’t close the school! It won’t happen again!”

But he only walked past her. “I should say it won’t,” As he passed the animals, he snatched their instruments from them, definitely not forgetting to send a glare towards the three human children. “This… this… and this are all coming with me. Now send them to bed!”

“You heard father,” Ms Langtree sadly motioned to another room. “Off to bed with you.”

In a single-file line, the children, human and animal, trudged into the room filled with well-made beds, one for three students maximum. On the way, they were each given a nightgown, Scout choosing to just throw hers on over her clothes along with her friends. “Wirt,” She whispered. “Are we seriously doing this?”

“Whatever you want, Scout. D-Don’t you need rest anyway? You look like you hit your head pretty hard.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right…” She climbed into bed with Greg, his frog nestling under the blanket between them. Scout took their hats off and set them off to the side, frowning at the boy’s pout. “What’s on your mind, Gregory?”

Said boy tore his eyes away from the saddened animal folk. “I just wanted to have fun, change the world, and make it a better place.”

“Who says you didn’t?” She hummed and began tucking him in.

“You probably forgot because of your amnesia. I just made everything worse, Scout. Look at them…”

Scout glanced over her shoulder at the animals who were now sniffling and sighing to themselves. Exhaling through her nose, she turned back to the boy. “You know, changing the world isn’t easy, Greg. And you won’t get it right the first time. But you know what?” She gently pressed her lips to his forehead. “You change my world for the better everyday.”

“Really?”

“Really, really.”

“So, you remembered our good times! You’re cured!”

From between them, the frog croaked, causing the two to giggle. From the bed beside them, Wirt softly smiled at the interaction, his heart warming as well as his cheeks. Beatrice watched him with narrowed eyes. “Okay, Wirt, I’ll admit it. You seem like a pushover, but you’re not.”

“Oh?” He shifted his gaze to her.

“Deep down in your heart… you’re a stubborn jerk! When are you gonna give this up?!”

Wirt stared forward with a determined look. “Maybe never. Maybe I’ll never give this up.”

Greg hummed before pushing the blanket off of he and Scout, the girl quietly groaning to herself. “Yeah! Wirt’s right! Never give up!” He cheered before grabbing his sheets and tying the ends together, throwing them out the window. “C’mon! Let’s go save the day!”

“Okay, if you say so,” Wirt left his bed, halting at his friend, who painfully sat up and turned to assist Greg. “W-Wait, w-what about Scout?”

Her head slowly turned to him. “What about me?”

“You’re hurt.”

“You know what? I order you to stop being such a Worry Wirt.” She playfully rolled her eyes. He sputtered for a second before giving in and following her out of the window.

After discarding their nightgowns, the gang wandered the blackened wood, the hooting of an owl being their only source of sound beside the three sets of feet shifting through the grass. Scout wrapped her arms around her sore body for warmth. From beside her, she felt Wirt fix her hat that had been leaning atop her head. She glanced at him with a thankful smile, sending heat to his cheeks and then to hers in turn. Clearing his throat, Wirt looked to his brother. “So, what’s the plan, Greg?”

“Plan?”

Scout tilted her head. “Yeah. You need to plan to change the world, bud.”

“Oh. I don’t know.” He shrugged.

Just then, a pitiful moan sounded from behind a bush. “Oh, who would’ve thought making a primer school for animals was a bad idea?”

Upon parting the bush, the three quietly gasped at the sight of Mr Langtree crouching on the ground, surrounded by the instruments he had confiscated, talking to himself. “My life savings, my home, everything I had went into that dear, dear school. And now I’m forced to sell these instruments just to keep it open,” As he continued, he removed his trench coat to reveal a quite scrawny man underneath the threatening facade, using his coat and a trumpet to act as a sorry tent. “All the while, that loathsome Jimmy Brown is off galavanting who knows where! Not to mention that wild gorilla on the loose. If only something would go right for a change…” He defeatedly sighed as he laid on the ground.

Soon, the sound of his snores filled the area. Scout hummed and shook her head. “Poor guy…”

“Yeah,” Greg nodded. “Okay, I think he’s asleep. Let’s go steal his stuff.”

Wirt, Scout and Beatrice widened their eyes. “What?”

-------------------------------------------------

As the sun emerged and the mildew leaked from the trees, Scout checked every last detail of the area before nodding to herself. Throughout the night, Greg, Wirt and Beatrice helped build a stage and notified anyone around of their benefit concert as Scout gathered the animal students to quickly learn a single song on their instruments. The work was tiring, but nothing she wasn’t used to. Rounding the front of the stage, she found Greg waiting for her, holding a baton for her. “There you are! It’s time to do what you were born to do! Do it for the world, Scout!”

“Alright, alright.” She chuckled and took the baton into her hand. Facing the band, she raised her arms in front of her, commencing the song. Her heart swelled with pride as the students played along perfectly. A joyful laugh bubbled in her throat as her arms waved and glided through the air to cue entrances and cut-offs. From the corner of her eye, she spotted people, apparently wealthy by their fine clothes and generous donations, trickling in from wherever they came from and dumping their purses and pockets clean into buckets provided. Her grin widened as they stopped beside the stage to stand and enjoy the beautiful music.

Her smile dropped when the students slowly halted their playing. “Guys, why’d you stop?” She raised her brows. Greg jumped onto the stage and pointed past her.

“Gorilla!”

That same pathetic roar from the previous day triggered the screaming of the audience. Scout spun around to find the gorilla she had knocked out was back and charging towards poor Ms Langtree. “Young man, do something!” Mr Langtree shouted at Wirt. The teen looked around uselessly before blindly running forward to do… something.

Before he could stop or hesitate, he tripped on his still untied laces and collided with the gorilla, sending them both to the ground. When they hit the ground, the head of the gorilla popped off and rolled to the side. Everyone gasped as Wirt scrambled to his feet. The headless gorilla sat up to reveal himself as a young man with silky, blonde hair and a handlebar mustache. “Finally.” His southern accent sighed out.

“Jimmy?” Ms Langtree gaped.

“That’s right, darlin’. I was the gorilla.”

“But… why did you do it…?”

“Got a job in the circus so’s I could finally buy ya that weddin’ ring,” He struggled to stand as Ms Langtree joined his side. “But when I got stuck in the dang suit, everybody was too doggone scared to help me out.”

Scout wringed her hands together in embarrassment. Ms Langtree cupped her cheeks in her hands as she swooned.

“Oh, Jimmy…”

“Darlin’...”

The two lovingly embraced, Greg shaking Scout as everyone cheered for them. Mr Langtree sniffled and wiped a tear from his eye. “I guess the world really is as sweet as potatoes and molasses…”

As if on cue, Greg plucked the baton from Scout’s grasp and turned to the band, starting his own song once again,

“Oh, potatoes and molasses.

If you want some, oh, just ask us!”

Sensing her work was done, Scout hopped off the stage and searched for her friend. He was leaning against a tree nearby with Beatrice perched on a branch above him. Giddily smiling, she shimmied her way over to them with a skip in her step. Wirt quietly chuckled as he watched her, raising a brow when she finally reached him.

“I did pretty good, huh?”

“You did great, Scout.”

She happily sighed and leaned beside him, their shoulders brushing at their closeness. Beatrice smirked at this. “Hey, Wirt.” She softly called.

“Yeah?” He glanced up at the branch.

“Tie your shoe.”

“Hm? Oh. Mm… okay.” He hummed and bent down to do as he was told.

Peeking over his cone hat, Scout spotted Beatrice glancing from Wirt, then to her, sending a wink her way. Scout widened her eyes and blushed furiously.

—————————————

Taglist: @kirishimas-manly-eyeliner

[parvuls]

fic: need seek no further

Jack shrugs. “Eh. Bittle likes Cabot butter best.”

a disgustingly fluffy, plotless ficlet about how well jack knows bitty and how he perfected the skill of nonverbal communication through the force of sheer will. also, the frogs.

read on ao3

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Dex called Bitty one evening in early May, let Bitty shower him with hellos, and then stated, “We won the NCAA championship.” He said it matter-of-factly, like maybe Jack and Bitty hadn’t been there when it happened, like Jack hadn’t watched him cling to Bitty for a full minute after the stands had spilled onto the ice.

“You did,” Bitty replied, raising his eyes to meet Jack’s with confusion wrinkling between his brows. His phone was set on the kitchen island between them, Dex’s voice filling their kitchen through speaker phone while Bitty’s floured hands were busy kneading dough. Jack was keeping him company on another last-minute testing session for his rhubarb pie recipe, even though the last proof of his book had been approved by his editors over two weeks before. Jack was running out of team members to send leftovers to.

“And Whiskey got voted captain,” Dex continued.

Jack watched as Bitty squinted down at his phone. Bitty had spent half an hour on the phone with Whiskey the night of the banquet; he hadn’t disclosed the details of their conversation to Jack, but his face when he’d returned to their room, had sat down next to Jack on the bed and had leaned his forehead on Jack’s bicep for a long while -- Jack had seen that face before. Had known that expression meant pride.

“So we were talking about it just now,” there was the sound of more people whispering furiously in the background, and Jack thought he could maybe hear Chowder’s unsteady voice calling out, hey Bitty!, and only then he began contemplating the solid possibility that Dex may have been a little drunk. “And -- so we won last year, with you, and now we won again, and we wanna keep winning, right? So we gotta make sure to keep doing everything that’s working.”

“Sure, sweetheart,” Bitty said agreeably, faintly amused. It was obvious to Jack from his tone that Bitty, at least, had already realized Dex was a little drunk, but was only too happy to play along.

“‘Swawesome,” Dex said fervently, like Bitty had agreed to something very important. “So you see why Whiskey’s gotta learn to make a pie.”

That stopped Bitty in his tracks. Jack blinked, watched Bitty’s long fingers halt their motions in the dough, the pressure of his fingerprints leaving crescent grooves behind. “William Joseph, that doesn’t make a lick of sense,” he said, and narrowed his eyes at the screen of his phone like Dex could feel their weight on him through the line. But then he seemed to think it over again, and the pitch of his voice rose as he demanded, “Wait, are you sayin’ Whiskey’s willing to learn how to bake?”

“He says he’ll do it for the win,” Dex said, and Bitty gaped at the phone, then gaped at Jack, and with his cheeks pink and his eyes wide he exclaimed, “Of course I’ll do it!”, like there’d ever been any other option to consider.

Jack kept it to himself, but he had no doubt in his mind that there hadn’t been.

.

.

.

Dex, Chowder and Nursey wait for them at the doorway of the Haus, broad shoulders wedged together in the narrow doorframe.

Bitty had said before they left home, “You don’t have to come, sweetpea,” and Jack had said, simply, “I want to,” and had meant it. It was only in the summer months that Jack had the privilege to see his friends whenever he wished to, and now that the Falconers were out of the playoffs -- well, Jack was feeling a little more withdrawn lately, even quieter than usual, but this felt like something he genuinely wanted to do with the time on his hands. There was also the fact that soon the frogs would graduate, and with them gone Jack would be too far removed to visit the Haus comfortably, even if Bitty still could.

Right now Jack could, and he wanted to, so Bitty and he got in Bitty’s car and drove the forty-five minutes down to Samwell, Bitty’s phone hooked through the aux and his hands tapping on the wheel to the beat. He was nervous, although Jack wasn’t sure exactly why -- only knew it was obvious in Bitty’s restless hands and the frequency he switched songs midway through. Jack reached out and placed his hand on Bitty’s thigh, squeezed, and let Bitty burn his nervous energy whatever way he deemed best.

“We did all the shopping!” Chowder announces as Jack and Bitty walk up the porch steps, and then immediately bounces forward and wraps Bitty in a hug. His long limbs envelope Bitty within them, and soon Jack’s dragged into their circle, too, feels Nursey’s arms fold around his shoulders and Dex’s tentative hand patting him on the back. It doesn’t overwhelm him like it could’ve, maybe, a year or two ago -- it just feels nice, familiar, welcoming. A display of affection he readily returns.

When the huddle breaks, the five of them shuffle through the door and head straight into the kitchen. It looks about the same as it has since Bitty took over it five years ago -- no longer just a room with a fridge full of beers and a broken down table, but a real kitchen, with Suzanne’s hand-sewn curtains and clear countertops and the oven that Jack is still irrationally fond of. Although it seems like it’s been revamped in the months since Jack has last seen it; the cupboards’ hinges are no longer busted, and there are actual shelves stacked along the walls. Jack assumes the likely suspect is Samwell Men’s Hockey current captain, and has to curb a revealing smile that would surely draw questions. It’s another unspoken team tradition, Jack thinks, recalling freshman Will Poindexter: no one leaves it entirely unchanged.

“Y’all are joining us for some baking lessons?” Bitty asks Nursey and Chowder, hand almost unconsciously drifting over the edge of the counters. He looks good there, really, looks right. He’s not the same as he was when he graduated and certainly not the same as when he first claimed this kitchen, but to Jack, Bitty would always look right in the sun streaming through the Haus’ dusty windows, puttering between pots and pans.

“Nah, C and I will get out of your hair for that, but Whiskey isn’t back yet so we’ve got some time. And anyway --” Nursey glances sideways at Dex and Chowder, fails at stifling a smile, “uh, the waffles heard you were coming today, Bits.”

“Going by their reaction, they’ve definitely missed you,” Dex says, arms crossed over his chest, his face serious but a single upwards quirk to the corner of his mouth. It could be a chirp at the waffles, maybe, but Jack is almost certain that it’s sincere nonetheless.

Bitty turns to the shopping bags spread across the counter and starts picking them apart, taking out the ingredients for inspection before setting them down with that same nervous energy, the one that rarely ever follows Bitty into his domain in the kitchen. Jack watches him smile at Dex, honest but jittery, and realizes what he should’ve already known -- how very important it is to Bitty that this goes perfectly.

“Oh, bless them, I’ve missed them too! I’ll tell them hello so we can get started right after,” Bitty says, setting down a bag of brown sugar and taking out a packet of butter from the bag. He looks -- momentarily disappointed, and Jack frowns, searches Bitty’s face. It’s probably only visible to Jack, who recognizes the subtle shift in Bitty’s jaw and the fleeting movement of his eyebrows, but still. He follows Bitty’s eyes down to his hands and to the butter in them, and surveys it for a moment, deep in thought.

“You’ve got two seconds to prepare yourself, bro,” Nursey warns, and then Bully, Hops and Louis descend loudly into the kitchen, flock around Bitty like ducklings. Bitty’s always had that effect on hockey players, on people, even before he got the C. It’s with intense fondness that Jack thinks it, knows the feeling intimately as someone who’s lucky enough to experience that affect every day. He can’t blame them for the way they beam down at Bitty, fight for his attention, laugh when he laughs at the rising volume of their clashing, simultaneous stories.

It’s a good opportunity if nothing else, though, so Jack shoulders his way between Bully and Louis, brushes two fingers over Bitty’s elbow to get his attention. When Bitty turns his head, Jack takes advantage of his height to lean in and say into Bitty’s ear, “Hey, bud, I’m stepping out for a moment.”

Bitty smiles at him, reaches up to stroke a hand down Jack’s cheek just warmly enough to be soothing, just quickly enough to be appropriate. “Yeah, of course. Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” Jack says, and thinks, it will be. He pauses, looks down threateningly at the waffles, and leans in to kiss Bitty's temple swiftly, before someone he can’t intimidate as easily as these sophomores could try fining him for it. The space he leaves between Bully and Louis closes as soon as he leaves their side, Bitty disappearing from sight behind their tall forms, but the sound of his cheerful laughter rings after Jack as he walks out of the kitchen and exits through the front door.

.

.

.

When Jack comes back he has to open the door one-handed, the other one busy clutching the handles of a grocery bag. His cap is pulled down low, a protective measure from the crowd that swarmed the Stop and Shop on Pemberton, so it takes a few steps into the Haus’ hallway for him to notice Whiskey hovering in the kitchen doorway, apparently stopped right on his way out of it.

“Jack,” Whiskey looks surprised -- or maybe still mildly star-struck, Jack has always had trouble telling with his face. “You’re here. I haven’t seen you.”

“Got some stuff from the shop,” Jack raises the bag by way of explanation, adjusts his hat, and after a brief moment of stillness hunches his shoulders to bypass Whiskey into the kitchen.

Whiskey bends his neck to peer down into the bag as Jack passes. He looks somewhat horrified at what he finds, as much as Whiskey ever betrays his emotions -- a slight frown, a barely noticeable widening of his eyes. “We need more groceries for this thing?”

Jack shrugs, noncommittal. They don’t, really, but. “Eh. Bittle likes Cabot butter best.”

The frogs and waffles have moved to the den while Jack was out -- he can hear them now, Bully’s low voice and Chowder’s quick speech and Hops’ rolling laughter -- but Bitty must’ve heard Jack come in, because he appears next to Whiskey in the kitchen doorway. His gaze darts between the two of them before it lands on the bag hanging from Jack’s fingers, and Jack reaches in to pull out one stick of butter, holding it out so Bitty can see the brand. Bitty’s eyes light up when he realizes, go round and bright, and he declares, “Sweetpea, you shouldn’t have!”, in the tone that means he’s beyond pleased that Jack did.

“That's more butter,” Whiskey says, staring at Bitty and then at the butter already stacked on the counter from the frogs’ shopping trip, clearly bewildered.

Jack twists his body, turns his back to them to find an empty spot somewhere on the counter. “Cabot has a half percent more fat, and Bittle likes his crust flaky,” he explains absently while emptying the contents of the bag onto the spot he chose. It’s important to Bitty that this goes perfectly, and while Jack can’t control Whiskey's abilities in the kitchen, wouldn’t be able to fix baking mishaps if those occur, this is something he can do. Make sure Bitty has the best conditions to work in, grant him a little peace of mind.

When he turns back around Whiskey is gone, and it’s only Bitty standing behind him, his eyes twinkling and his lips parted slightly.

“What?” Jack asks, confused.

There’s a long stretch of silence while Bitty just looks at him. Jack’s rarely comfortable with intense scrutiny from others, but Bitty -- Bitty’s gaze is soft, and he looks at Jack like he’s something good, something to admire. It’s a look he gives Jack often, usually accompanied by the gentlest of kisses, the warmest of hugs, the kindest of words. Sometimes Jack’s mind is slow to catch up, too stubborn to be convinced of his own worthiness, but this is the look Bitty gets when his emotions are broadcasted so loudly that even Jack’s mind has to pipe down and listen.

Bitty takes a few steps closer, grabs Jack’s palm between both his hands. “Marry me?” he asks breathily, with a smile curling at his lips.

Warmth flutters in Jack’s stomach at the words, and an answering smile grows on his own lips. The ring glints on Bitty’s finger whenever he moves his hands, is glinting now, where his fingers are curled around Jack’s in the sunny kitchen. It’s been a distraction many times in the past year, but each time Jack sees it he’s reminded of what Bitty and he have promised to each other. The future that is still to come.

There’s no one in the kitchen but them, and the Haus residents sound busy enough in the other room that no one would notice if Jack stole a lone moment. “Sorry, I can’t,” Jack deadpans, grabs Bitty by his hips and gathers him into his arms. His fingers slide over the soft fabric of Bitty’s clothes and find the gap between his top and his shorts, dipping inside to rub against Bitty’s warm skin. “It’s a tempting offer, but I’m already engaged.”

“Leave him, then,” Bitty says without missing a beat. He tilts his head up to nudge Jack’s cheek with his nose, wraps his strong arms around Jack’s neck. His face is so close to Jack’s that Jack can count his pale eyelashes, can see the splotches of fading pink on his skin. He’s been spending a lot of time editing his cookbook on their balcony since springtime has arrived, and his body tans nicely but the bridge of his nose has been reddened and peeling for a while. “Run away with me.”

Jack can’t help the temptation, kisses Bitty’s right cheek and then his left one. “Sorry, bud.”

“Why ever not,” Bitty sighs, most dramatically, and uses his grip on Jack’s neck to lean his upper body backwards. “A man who knows his butters? You better believe I’m willing to fight for you, mister.”

It’s the sincerity in his voice that has heat prickling across Jack’s skin, raw pleasure squirming in his chest. It’s a futile battle, though, a battle Jack realized was lost when he dropped Bitty off at this very Haus after their very first summer together, longingly watched him skip up the stairs and thought, oh, I wanna marry him. “I can’t,” he tells Bitty quietly, pulls him closer so the words stay trapped between them, rough and intimate like a secret. “I love my fiancé too much.”

“Oh,” and Bitty flushes at this, red blossoming on the apples of his cheeks like he’s flattered -- like the ring around his finger hasn’t been there for a year, like Jack hasn’t taken to kissing it before kissing Bitty goodbye on nights he leaves for games; like Jack loving him too much to ever consider anyone else is still a novelty, a compliment, after all this time. “Well. Lucky him.”

Lucky me, Jack thinks, and bows his head to fit his mouth to Bitty’s in for a lingering sweet kiss.