#.. anyways. ugh I need to draw for that before I start the current thing. sad. AUGHHHH my animation plans… they’re never going to get done.

[winged-wolf-s-collection-of-arts]

AAAAAUUUUGH GOOOODNIIIIIGHT. I’ll dream of more inspiration hopefully.

[treenissanderssidesstuff]

One

A03 Link

Thank you to @edupunkn00b for helping me beta this story!

Words: 4222

Pairing: Roceit (Platonic Demus)

TW: None that I know of, feel free to inform me.

Summary: Janus decides to play "prince."

Inspired by @aidensm8's work in the request they filled for me. Also loosely inspired by some of the drawings @reddstardust made in response to aiden's work as well.

Link to post.

Ah HAH! I found it! Link to original ask.

The darkside’s corridor had been quiet recently, annoyingly so in Remus’ opinion. It’d been quiet in general since Virgil left and the terrible trio became a dinky duo, but now that Janus split his time between the sides, Remus had found himself increasingly uno. It was usually fine, he had the entire imagination to keep him busy and entertained, after all. He could make sides if he wanted to. But… it wasn’t quite the same. That was probably the only reason he had bothered to hang around at all when Janus went on another tirade about how insufferable and brainwashed the lightsides were, how Roman was being pushed, blah blah blah. After the last video release, the dialogged had temporarily shifted. That had gotten Remus’ attention. It seemed that Roman had rejected Janus, not just chosen someone else’ way over the deceitful side’s own, but outright stood against Janus even when the others folded around him. It would be funny, if it weren’t so sad.

All of Janus’ plans had been for Roman’s sake.

And in three miscalculated moves, Janus had managed to push away the one side he sought the approval of.

“Do you think this will work?” Janus asked, tugging at the yellow sash hanging off his shoulder again.

“Oh, definitely not,” Remus said flatly, flipping through an upside down fairytale book on the couch with a bored expression on his face. The duke had been forced to hear about Janus’ plans to woo—“reconcile” with Roman for days and at this point it was honestly slightly obnoxious how invested Janus was. “But it’s just the right side of disgustingly cheesy that Roman’s sure to love it even when you inevitably fall on your face.”

“I will!” Janus “I- I mean I won’t!  I mean-!“ Janus shoved his face in his hands with a groan.

Remus quirked an eyebrow in the snake’s direction, watching the self-proclaimed “Lord of Lies” try and compose himself. Thankfully, Remus did know what he meant, even when Janus wasn’t sure of it himself. It was one of his special skills as the bestfriend™.

“Look, J, I’m going to tell you this very clearly and carefully, as your friend,” Remus said, pushing up into a sitting position from his previous sprawl across the couch. “Your plans suck.”

"Excuse you?!" Janus nearly shrieked in retaliation to Remus' brand of hard truths. “They do!… not!”

Remus couldn't have stopped the subsequent string of chuckles if he wanted to. That was the biggest lie he'd ever heard Jan tell and Remus had heard plenty over the years given how rarely the two were ever apart. The darkside pair just meshed well. Janus was the liar, sure, but Remus was the secret keeper. Even if Roman struggled to understand Janus, Remus never had. The snake couldn't hide from him, even when he wanted to. It came with Remus' position as the holder of intrusive thoughts; he got a front row seat to every dirty little secret the others tried to lock away and bury in their little shame closets. What they didn't realize however, was that Remus had the master key. Remus quite literally was the little hint of truth behind every one of Janus' lies. The truths that Janus tried to tug and weave and bend around the others to get his way.

Remus was the keeper of the blatant, harsh, and often downright uncomfortable truths, not just what the sides tried to hide from Thomas, but also what they tried to hide from each other. It was a lot like the story The Giver. Someone had to hold all of the knowledge the little utopia unit tried to hide from and Remus had been designated. Though, he usually thought of himself more of a receiver than anything. Roman was the giver of the pair. The giver of dreams, wishes, and fantasies. Remus was more like a radio with the dial gummed up and stuck on where the power switch had broken off ages ago. Not that all of the secrets were so bad to tune into, some were sweet, some were shy, and a few were even downright adorable, but more often than not, secrets were kept that way for a reason and the Deceitful side had the most secrets of all.

They worked because Janus could never ever keep a secret from Remus and likewise, Remus would never ever tell.

The Deceitful side trusted him, was the only one to trust him and Remus was adamant to keep that trust. Remus locked it in a little box and kept it close, in the few little hideaways he had. In his pockets, within little small nooks of the imagination, and under the bed on the nights when Thomas’ thoughts turned up to an 11 and even Remus started to wonder what he still had left to give.

He had that.

A tiny little secret of his own.

Most of the time, it was enough.

"Your. Plans. Suck." Remus emphasized, slowly, pushing up from the ratty sofa Janus had sewn back up after Remus’ countless escapades over the years. Janus complained about it every time. He cited everything from the loose springs, and flattened stuffing, to the threadbare upholstery and warped base. He always told Remus just to replace the broken thing, but that never stopped careful fingers in yellow-clad gloves from systematically putting the thing back together again each time, always working away at it before Remus could even consider replacing the old lump.

That was his friend’s best and worst trait after all. Janus could not let things go. He wrapped and coiled and held on to any little scrap that he could get a hold of. His problem was that when he panicked, that coil became a death grip.

That's how they lost Virgil.

And that's how Janus was currently losing Roman.

"My plans are ama--mph--" Janus glared at Remus with fury striking like lightning in his eyes after Remus willed a zipper to appear across Janus' lips to force them shut, fully closing even the snake side.

Even best friends needed a taste of their own medicine every now and again, lest they forget how bitter it can be.

"Ah, ah, ah my sweet snoot," Remus nearly sang as he skipped over to his favorite danger noodle and reached out to boop Janus' nose. "It's my turn to talk now.

“You went in and pretend to be Patton, just to have him show up on you and made Thomas want to tell the truth more. Even then, you had almost had Roman on your side, but got so focused on semantics, you missed the actual benefits. You reviewed, revised, and waited to try again after deciding Logan and his facts were the problem, right?

“Then—“ Remus started, holding his mace up threateningly as Janus made some displeased, but muffled noises from behind the zipper, likely some kind of litany of curses. Had Remus not been prepared with his mace, the other side likely would have already tried to strong arm him into getting rid of the bound. “You tried to play Logan and just… ugh, Janny you are not allowed to act anymore. That was a terrible performance. Anyway! The trial starts and you get into it and try to defend what Roman wants, right?”

Janus’ incomprehensible complaints cease, only for him to squint at Remus suspiciously and give a slow nod.

“Wrong!” Remus proclaimed, swinging his mace toward the snake and stopping so close to his face, the metal spikes brushed some of the bangs hanging over the bridge of Janus’ nose. “Instead, you got carried away again. You got caught up in semantics and made it about who Thomas is as a person rather than what would be the better choice to make.

“In short, you made it all about you. Again,”  Remus said, letting his morning star drop as the energy was sucked out of him with his rant. “Sure, you won the argument, but you lost what you actually wanted.”

Remus wasn’t usually one to insert his opinions on things, that was more Janus’ thing and, gosh it was exhausting. How did the snake even keep up with just… caring so much about everything?

It seemed Remus wasn’t the only one suddenly exhausted though, because after rubbing some of the strain out of his own eyes, the duke watched Janus slowly slump backwards until he was all but sitting on the arm of their scrap couch. He wasn’t fighting the zipper any longer, his extra arms were tucked away and his normal pair were laid listlessly on his lap now as he stared down at his own yellow gloves.

“How was my brother meant to make any other decision when you put what Thomas wanted, against who he wanted to be? I wouldn’t care, indulgence is my territory. But Roman’s job is to be the dream, the ideal. You should know that.”

When Janus finally looked up at Remus, he just looked sad.

He looked pale, his eyes were shiny, and all the regality he tried to hold himself with in that dupe prince costume just fell away from him as he pressed his palms to his temples.

Remus finally let the zipper fall away into nonexistence.

He wasn’t done yet.

“Look J, I know you had good intentions.”

“But?” a slightly rough voice asked from a newly freed mouth as a yellow glove brushed the remaining ghosting sensations of the enclosure away.

Remus sighed, already imagining the hoard of grotesque creatures he’d be battling through in the imagination after this “talk.” He needed something to balance out all of the gross feelings and shit.

“But I don’t think Roman or Thomas would have chosen the wedding if you hadn’t gotten side tracked. You tried to prove you’re ugh ‘goodness’ by arguing you’re a part of Thomas. Your whole argument backfired and made him question if he’s any good. What else did you expect but for him to try and prove he is? Not to mention the after incident.”

“That was meant to be an apology,” Janus murmured miserably. “I had taken Logan’s place with the intention of leading Roman to work out his own mistreatment.”

“But you showboated.”

“I-“ Janus started, clearly ready to argue again, but stopped himself with a single look from Remus. “…I did what I thought was necessary.”

“Did you now?” Remus snorted. “Sure, going and pretending to be the nerd I get, but why change went Patton went full kaiju? You could have kept up the act and stood alongside Roman. It would have been an all around win for the lightsides as everyone would think Roman and Logan worked together to reign in one of their own.”

“I… I just wanted….”

“You wanted to be accepted. You saw an opportunity to be the hero and you took it, not caring who you hurt along the way. First you took Patton’s role as morality, then you took Logan’s role as logic, and to round it all out, you took Roman’s role as Thomas hero. That’s your problem.”

“Is wanting a place at the discussion table so bad?” Janus asked with a sigh, folding his arms in his lap.

“No, but taking it is,” Remus said, tugging the tiny chain that typically held Janus’ cape to his shoulders. It was currently re-purposed to secure the cape into a makeshift sash.

“Because that’s not a hypocritical statement at all, coming from you,” Janus replied swatting at Remus’ hands that still fiddled with his sash. “It’s not as if you, oh I dunno, knocked out Roman and took his spot during your entrance or anything.”

“True, but when I did it, I made Robro their hero.” Remus said, letting himself fall back onto the couch lazily as Remus saw the first sign of real recognition budding within his friend’s heterocromatic eyes.

“He is their hero.”

“Does he know that?”

“He wouldn’t believe me if I told him so.”

“So, what are you going to do?”

###

Roman groaned and carefully maneuvered his skirt from the grasp of yet another birch tree. It was fair to say that the photo shoot wasn’t exactly going how he had pictured it when he had chosen a full gown paired with an outdoor setting. He knew there must have been a reason why the others had all chosen knee length skirts and stayed indoors. Instead of just taking a picture, Roman had to build a scene. He had to wow his audience and every part of the image had to be carefully designed. He just… hadn’t exactly thought everything through. Roman had imagined something more along the lines of sweeping gracefully through the forest as the gown swished around him as his every movement was made even more graceful by the gentle sway of the fabric.

He hadn’t accounted for how often his outfit would catch on the branches and foliage around him.

It wasn’t fair.

Disney princesses usually seemed to magically get along with the flora and fauna around them, long skirts or not, unless they were being trailed by some evildoer of course, but that didn’t count. Roman was by himself at the moment. On break from getting frustrated one too many times as his own outfit betrayed him during the photo shoot. The photographer and set designer needed some time to reevaluate the next set and Roman needed some time to clear away his current frustration.

So, into the woods he went. He carefully lifted his skirt to protect it against nearly ripping for the fourth or fifth time today as he gingerly stepped around branches, dearly missing his boots as stray twigs tried to impale themselves into his sandled feet. At least his hair wasn’t so long that it would get unexpectedly tangled in the branches above, but he did have to pick some burrs off of his bolero already after he had tried to catch himself on a bush during an unfortunate stumble. The maneuver saved his outfit from getting muddy, but he didn’t make it unscathed.

Roman had dreamed of being on the cover of magazines his whole life. Though, in those dreams it was usually due to a movie deal but he had never been opposed to the idea of modeling like some of the other sides were. Logan found the idea of it mindless, Virgil was anxious about the attention, and Patton wasn’t fond of the rumored cutthroat environment. Still, Roman had thought it seemed so glamorous. However, he hadn’t taken into account how much work it was.

Sure, it seemed simple. Pose and shoot, right? In reality though, it was tedious work as the photographer rapidly took hundreds of pictures at just slightly different angles so they could all be evaluated later for the “best” ones. That meant not just holding a pose, but also holding an expression. Roman felt like his acting skills were being put to fill use as he tried to strike the idea of power into each click of the camera.

Absolutely nothing about this had been simple though.

Roman found himself sighing and leaned against one of the scattered trees for moral and physical support after carefully maneuvering his gown around it. He would be fine. He was royalty after all and the first rule was to never let them see you cry. It would all be okay once he took a chance to catch his metaphorical breath. Though, the literal sense wasn’t a bad idea either. He imagined the breathing exercises that Virgil had gone through with him when the prince accidentally shown up at Virgil’s door in a less than royal state after the whole wedding debauchery and name reveal sham. The near panic attacking pulling him there unwittingly.

It was… it was nice. Roman and Virgil had been getting along better than ever after his own acceptance video, but it was like a new wall had broken down around the pair. Virgil had stationed himself as Roman’s personal bodyguard since the events that need not be named and… it was nice. A little lonely, but he appreciated everything that the anxious side was doing for him and especially appreciated how he kept between him and the-side-who-probably-lied-about-his-name-anyway.

Roman didn’t think he was ready to open up that can of snakes quite yet.

Hey Princey, it’s going to be okay, yeah? You’re better than this… and him.

The words rang around Roman’s skull once, twice, and then he straightened his shoulders. Even when Virgil wasn’t around, he was right. The prince could practically feel the anxious side aiming a smirk his way from somewhere in the incomprehensible distance. Still, it was good to remember.

He was better than this.

He was going to march right back to that photo-shoot, take some fabulous as fuck photos, and then march home with his head hell high because he was going to look damn good in the final set!

Hiking up his skirt again, Roman prepared himself for the trudge back, feeling ready to take on the world once again, except—

—except something caught his eye.

Well… there was a well… a literal one out in the distance. It was old looking, some of the bricks were broken or even just missing, and there seemed to be this misty haze that hung around it, a little thinner than full fog, but something about it felt slightly… otherworldly? With only a moment of hesitation, Roman found himself taking a step towards it and then another, and then another…

…the others would be fine without him for just a few minutes longer, right?

It was such an oddly beautiful scene, broken down and uncared for, but there was still something just so striking about it. Plus, how many chances would be get to interact with a real life well? This could be a great location to take some shots and he’d be remiss if he didn’t take advantage of it!

There was also one other advantage to it as well. It wasn’t often after all that real settings lended themselves so pefectly to the Disney aesthetic. Mind you, Snow White was by no means his favorite movie. The plot-line was a bit... outdated. Still, he admired the film for everything it represented as the first Disney classic of the golden age, the film that really started it all! Snow White was a marvel of animation for its time and the well song was the sound engineers of the time showing off.

He could respect that.

Roman crept closer, one careful step at a time until his toes of his sandles nearly touched the stone. He, ever so gently, let himself kneel down slowly, until his knees began to rest upon the well’s edge. He carefully let his shoulders relax as he watched the light reflecting in the water’s slightly cloudy surface. It was just for a tiny bit longer, after all. He let his hands slowly unclench from around the skirt as the velvety material draped and flowed around him. It was nice to have something else bear the weight of the heavy material for a little while.

“Make a wish into the well,” Roman whispered, letting his fingers trace over the loose stones circling the murky opening. To be fair, it was the tiniest bit more decrepit then the one pictured in the film. He sighed and slowly let his form drape across the layered bricks as he let one hand hang over the side as his fingertips danced across the water’s surface. “That’s all I have to do, huh?”

“And if you hear it echoing, your wish will soon come true~”

The sweet bell chime of Snow’s voice only sang the next line within Roman’s own mind, but it was enough to spur his continuance.

“I’m wishing~” Roman quietly sang, trying not to feel too silly as his voice carried to no one at all. At least Snow had some animals to sing to. He had nothing but the ripples of a moss covered and slightly over-flooded well that had certainly acted as a catch all drainage for the recent string of storms.

Roman tried not to empathize with the stacked pile of rocks.

He wasn’t sure if it was the well or his own internal imagination still remembering the movie, but he could almost hear an echo reply back with, “I’m wishing”

“For the one I love, to find me,”

“To find me”

“Todaaay.”

“Todaaaaay~” came a smooth voice behind Roman’s back, causing the royal side to literally jump up and onto their feet from their previous position lounged across the well edge.

“Deceit,” Roman glowered, hiking up the lengthy gown to take a couple cautionary steps backwards. He wasn’t sure what to make of what he was seeing. There Janus was, decked out in an outfit modeled after his own typical princely gear, right down to the sash that was—wait—was that his cape?

“Not today,” Janus said simply, taking slow steps forward until the fake prince came nearly nose to nose with the real one. “Today, my darling, I thought I’d try something new, just for you.”

And then the humming started.

“Now that I’ve found you, hear what I have to saaay~”  Janus started, singing along to the familiar tune. “One song,~”

“~Ever entreating, constant but true~”

A gloved hand tried to weave its way between Roman’s fingers as the other hovered just to Roman’s side and would have been only a moment away from resting against his hip, had he not jerked away the moment those gloves touched him.

“There’s nothing ‘true’ about you!” Roman yelled, not caring anymore that the edges of his skirt swept the soil beneath him as he pulled away.

Roman had planned a second round of photos after his break, but couldn’t stand the thought anymore. No, Janus had ruined this for him, just like everything else he had systematically ruined in Roman’s life recently.

Roman was about to start again, blaming the Deceitful side for this, for mercilessly pushing and shoving his way into Roman’s space, his things, his life, except—

—expect he had this look on his face. Big, mismatched eyes stared back at Roman, wide, and shimmery and open. Roman had to remind himself that the hurt shining his way was probably just another trick, just another ploy to manipulate the prince again.

...Okay, not even Roman totally believed it.

“What do you want from me?” Roman whispered, he didn’t know if he was asking the other side or himself from how quietly his voice whispered the words.

“I just want one.”

One what?

“One chance,” Janus said, taking a slow step forward toward the prince. “One opportunity to apologize properly.”

As Janus moved forward, one of Roman’s feet took a preparatory step backwards for balance, ready to move, ready to defend or flee. But Roman stayed rooted in place as the snake in princely garb moved closer.

“One day, that I can pretend that my actions and intentions had aligned, my dear,” Janus said, only stopping once his chest nearly brushed against Roman’s own. “One day, to pretend that I was your savior.”

“I don’t under—“ Roman muttered, before he could curse himself for engaging with this at all. His brain was just the smallest bit frazzled from the proximity and Janus had no shortage of charm in the way he could deliver a line.

“Shhhhh,” Janus hushed gently, tugging the yellow gloves from his hand before he reached up to trace his thumb against Roman’s cheekbone. “Can’t we just  have a fantasy for a little while my prince? Just this once?”

Roman swallowed as Janus leaned further into his space.

“Fantasy is my specialty, I suppose,” Roman muttered, clinging to the fact that the sweet talk was simply to get him to conjure some kind of indulgent daydream rather than trying to lead Roman to some other kind of nefarious goal. “What kind of fantasy were you looking to dive into?”

“I want one where I gave you your happy ending in the way I intended Roman.”

Roman just stared, his jaw dropping slightly at those words.

Janus didn’t flinch, didn’t throw his voice, or quirk his eyebrows, or any of number of little tells that the Deceitful side expected the others to pick up on in conversation. No he just met Roman’s stare with something heavy behind those heterochromatic eyes.

“Please Roman? I know it’s selfish to ask, but we both know selfish is what I am. Just let me be one today. Can’t we pretend for just one day?”

“What ‘one’ do you even mean?” Roman huffed half-heartedly. Even he could feel the fire slowly extinguishing in his chest as the conversation continued. “Who are you today then? The liar or the saint?”

Janus paused a moment, his gaze unwavering from Roman’s own face. Roman watched the scales on his neck glimmer in the sunlight as he swallowed, before taking the last final step into the prince’s space as a gloveless hand sat itself on Roman’s hip.

“Neither today my dearest,” Janus said with a cocky smile as he used his free hand to brush Roman’s fluffy bangs from his eyes.

“Today, I simply want to be the one in your fantasy.”

[johannesviii]

This is a long post about Shaman King I started to write ages ago and I don’t have a good title for it

Let me tell you about Shaman King for a few minutes, okay. Because the new anime adaptation is coming in like 3 months and I’m still not ready for it. Also I started to write this post 5 years ago just because I re-read the whole thing at the time and it’s been in my drafts since then. Oops

But yeah Shaman King was the very first fandom I got into when I first had a real internet access, around 2003-2004. I was around fifteen. The manga was still going. And in retrospect, it was full of problems. Among other things:

Not enough female characters & questionable choices for most of the ones who actually have a part to play in the plot

A black character drawn with big lips (see above), and I REALLY HOPE this is gonna get fixed in the new anime ; I mean even the author stopped drawing him like that a few years ago when he did the “remix tracks” extra chapters so come on please

An imaginary native american tribe who, while pretty cool, is still imagined by a Japanese dude in 1999 soooo yeah there’s some rough corners here and there (edit: got some anon hate about that but I'm sorry, "ancient aliens" tropes always make me uncomfortable)

An art quality which gets worse and worse over time due to deadline pressures and an increasingly exhausted author

Was stopped before it could reach its natural conclusion (the author drew an actual ending years later and tbh it’s great so I’m putting this very low on the list)

So yeah. Manga from 1999. Problematic. Aged badly. It happens.

BUT.

In retrospect, most of it is such a kick in the metaphorical butt of shonen manga as a whole I can’t believe it was competing against Naruto and One Piece at some point?? Like

It’s a shonen so it plays the "dramatic and sudden power jump” game, but it uses it to reach a surprising conclusion (in the “new” ending I mean)

Most of the characters are “shamans” which means they can see ghosts and spirits, and they use them to fight, to work, or to help other people. This is a manga in which you’re gonna see a Russian shaman channeling a Vodyanoy spirit into a drum to create a torrential flood. You don’t see that in every manga

It’s stated right away that no shaman can be truely, irredeemably bad, because only good-natured people can see ghosts and spirits.

So, no matter how bad a villain may be, they must have had a good nature once even if they look like a complete bastard at the moment.

How far is the author willing to go with that concept? Pretty far

Even without talking about the main villain and how the story ends because, duh, spoilers... Like

My favorite character, who gets a full redemption arc later, cuts someone open in his first chapter

He’s one of the good guys 10 volumes later

Speaking of which the amount of gore in this manga has to be seen to be believed, Jump would never let this happen nowadays

If you’re wondering why this is in the “positive” (......?) list it’s because I was 14/15 and all kids that age crave blood and angst

The main character, Yoh, pictured above, is very laid-back, and I mean very. He listens to the in-world equivalent of Bob Marley and constantly wears big headphones. Also he wears sandals, and sometimes there’s a weed leaf drawn on his t-shirt

His parents arranged a mariage between him and a girl shaman even though they’re still teenagers, so this would have potential for High Drama - but surprisingly enough it turns out they like each other and after that he just goes around saying “this is my future wife” and she’s like “hello if you touch him I’m going to end you”

It sounds weird and it......... is, tbh, but it’s also refreshing among all the “ugh, girls, yuck” tropes that nearly all shonen mangas used to have at the time

Yoh’s main goal in life is to live with minimal effort

When his grandfather tells him he must train to participate in a shaman tournament which happens every 500 years, because the winner gets a wish granted by the Great Spirit, he decides his wish will be to make everybody’s life easy so that nobody will ever be forced to work or do shit they don’t want to do to survive anymore

Yoh Asakura is a Millenial icon don’t @ me

Speaking of which

Almost everyone in this series is broke as f█ck

Yoh owns a big house but that’s only because the price was ridiculously low since it’s the most haunted place in Tokyo and nobody else wants to live there. The house is constantly full of other characters (including enemies) who have literally nowhere else to go

The only important character who isn’t broke has money because his family is super rich but he hates all of them because they’re all bastards so it’s super awkward

Another character bought a really cool motorbike but he’s going to be in debt for the next 40 years

Also he’s a hobo

And also bi

What I’m trying to say is: relatable

Also the tournament is held by an imaginary Native American tribe. They’re also broke. All of them. The two judges who are in charge of the main characters live in a cramped appartment and often try to sell souvenirs in the street to pay the rent

I know that’s hashtag problematic but I still love them I can’t help it

Just like in most shonen mangas the hero seems to amass a big collection of Friends but since everyone is a weirdo in a way or another and comes from all over the world it looks even funnier

At some point during the tournament, the main characters have to form small groups of three in order to participate to the next part. Yoh’s team is one of the strongest teams among the ones we’ve met at this point, and is composed of 1) Yoh, a laid-back sleepy kid wearing toilet sandals 2) the aforementioned bi hobo who’s sad because his current crush is in a rival team, and 3) a thirty-something tatooed guy with no legs and an IV drip and who looks like he hasn’t slept since 1997

Oh and they all wear adds for a bath house

Because remember: everyone’s f█cking broke

Spoilers for the mid-point of the manga but I need to talk about it because it encapsulates everything I used to love in it

You’ve been warned

So

At some point the main character, Yoh, is asked to choose between staying in the tournament or resurrect his rival

This is framed as some kind of very heavy, very huge dilemma. Like oh no what will he do. Will he give up his dreams and hopes. Will You Push The Button(tm)

So the choice is presented to him

In a very dramatic way

And he immediately goes “there’s a way to save him?? YES PLEASE”

He doesn’t hesitate a single second and drops the tournament in a heartbeat to save the guy

This scene greatly contributed to make me a better person I’m not even joking at all

I love Yoh

So anyway I don’t have a proper conclusion for this

Shaman King is very flawed and its flaws need to be acknowledged to fully appreciate all the good things in it, and the “old” fandom from more than 15 years ago was a very good formative experience for me because the forum I was on (which was nuked from the face of the internet by a hacker “looking for training grounds” (his words not mine, he posted it on our frontpage a full week before he did it) in 2005, rip) was full of people who were really into criticising every little aspect of the manga but still loved it dearly

And I think that’s a healthy way to enjoy things and I think we should bring this back

Anyway

Shaman King extremely flawed but full of good things

I still can’t believe it’s back

Johannes out

[snowdice]

Big Bang (Sort of) Editing Story [Day 48]

I started writing this fic while editing my Big Bang story, but am going to continue doing it for other things now that Kill Dear is out. I will write and publish 100 words of the story every time I finish doing whatever task I’m doing. If you’d like to block these proceedings, please feel free to block the tag proofread stories. I will reblog this post with the parts of the story I do today. Edited chapters are linked; everything else I’ve done so far is under the cut.

My Master Post Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18

Ugh I have so many boring things to do today, so have this.

Chapter 19

Thomas sighed in relief as the door to the royal wing finally came into sight. He was exhausted from his journey to Lamir for many reasons. Beyond just the physically taxing journey, he’d also had to deal with the emotions of loosing someone he had thought of as a friend while also trying to help her young daughter who had just had the crown thrust upon her.

Now he just wanted to see his own child and curl up into bed. He smiled at Owen and Kalani as he approached. “Is Logan here?” he asked.

Owen nodded. “The prince and his royal advisor are having a slumber party.”

Thomas smiled. “Of course, they are,” he said.

 He said goodnight to the two guard as they’d be getting off duty soon even if he did manage to drag himself out of his room again tonight and walked past them into the hall.

He walked past the room where they kept the jewels, though was unsurprised to see that the room was unlatched as Patton loved playing around with the different jewelry and had probably left it open when he grabbed them. He was however surprised when his son’s room’s door was thrown open, as Logan usually couldn’t stand for the thing to be open with or without him in it.

 Thomas didn’t think much of it however, and simply walked over to look inside. He was surprised when he didn’t see his son or Patton and instead saw that the only person in the room was a young boy that Thomas did not recognize. He was seated in one of Logan’s chairs and had his head tilted looking at himself in the mirror. He seemed to be trying to get a look at the ornament on the back of his head, and Thomas felt his heart seize a little bit when he recognized the hairpin.

He hadn’t recovered from that gut punch when the boy’s eyes drifted and met his in the mirror. There were a couple of long seconds where the two of them stared at each other in silence.

“Hello?” Thomas finally managed to get out.

Panic. There was suddenly horribly intense panic in the child’s eyes, the likes of which Thomas had never seen before. Thomas could only blink dumbly as he hopped to his feet like his seat was suddenly made of hot coals and then threw himself across the room to the opposite side from Thomas.

He looked around himself, back to the wall and considered Thomas with wildly spooked eyes. Clearly, he realized that he was pinned in Logan’s room by Thomas being in the door.

The boy dropped suddenly and disappeared under Logan’s bed.

 “Uh,” Thomas said, confused and shocked and still a bit in pain from seeing that piece of jewelry in use. He crossed slowly over to the bed and bent down to look under it, moving the bed skirt slightly to the side. He saw a small shaking blob curled up into itself under the bed. “Um, hi,” he said softly.

The blob did not respond except to continue shaking.

Thomas frowned and settled himself onto the floor. “It’s okay,” he said softly. Had he been here stealing things? Thomas had to wonder as he wasn’t sure why someone here for legitimate reasons would be acting so terrified of being caught. Though, that posed the question of how he’d gotten past the guards, and why Logan hadn’t noticed him. “I’m not mad,” Thomas said. “You’re fine.”

The boy looked up briefly from his knees looking terrified. Thomas tried to smile at him gently, but that just made him hunch into himself more, his breathes coming faster. That wasn’t good.

“No, shh,” Thomas said softly. “It’s okay. I promise it’s okay.” He did not seem to believe him, and Thomas winced. What was he supposed to do? He couldn’t just leave him here but trying to talk him down himself didn’t seem to be working.

Luckily, a familiar voice spoke from behind him then. “Dad?” Logan asked.

Thomas looked back at him. Both Logan and Patton were standing at the door, a couple of pieces of jewelry in their hands. They seemed very surprised to see him.

“You… seem to have a guest,” Thomas informed them.

 “I…” Logan said, beginning to edge into the room like he was expecting something to blow up at any moment. “Yes.” He got to Thomas and squeezed himself between him and the bed, putting a physical barrier between Thomas and the boy. Confused, Thomas took a couple of steps away without challenge. “That,” Logan glanced behind him. Patton had moved to the opposite side of the bed from Logan and Thomas and had gotten to his knees to look under it. “That is Virgil.”

Thomas blinked at him. “Virgil?” he asked.

“He’s… new to the castle,” Logan explained. Patton started speaking softly the boy, but Thomas could not make anything he said out. “Patton and I… invited him to a sleepover.”

“The guards didn’t mention anything,” Thomas said, sure that they would have warned him if there was a stranger in the royal wing.

“Uh, well, Virgil is… shy and we didn’t think you’d be back for another week. So, we snuck him past them.”

“Shy?” Thomas asked doubtfully. That was a lot more than shy.

“Particularly of adults,” Logan said.

Thomas took a moment to let that sink in. “Oh.” He was… scared of adults. Thomas could imagine many reasons why that might be the case and none of them set well. “I see.”

“Hey, no, sweetie, stop that,” Patton said, sounding distressed. Patton had managed to draw Virgil out from underneath the bed, though they were both still mostly hidden behind it and Thomas had no question in his mind that if he went to step towards them, Virgil would be back underneath it in a moment. Currently the boy seemed to be clawing at his own head. “No, baby shh,” Patton said, trying to stop him from tearing the pinned in hairpiece out, Thomas realized. “I’ll get it out,” Patton promised him. “Just calm down and let me do it.” He sounded close to tears, and Thomas couldn’t particularly blame him with the way the boy was acting. “You’re hurting yourself, baby.”

He must know, Thomas realized. If Logan had known he was here, then he must have allowed him to use that hairpiece. He’d probably even told Virgil that it belonged to his dead father. Now he was probably terrified that Thomas would be mad at him for touching it, especially when he’d come in to find Virgil alone without Logan to explain.

Patton managed to get all the pins undone and placed the piece delicately on the bed before wrapping himself protectively around the boy and hushing him.

Logan was looking back at them as well. He looked between the puddle of upset on the floor and Thomas. “Could…” he said. “Could I maybe come and see you in a few minutes, Dad?”

“Of course,” Thomas said. “Of course, I’ll go wait in my room. Take as much time as you need.”

He was careful to move slowly as he stepped towards the door, so the poor thing didn’t notice him move and mistake it for him approaching. He closed Logan’s bedroom door softly behind him feeling even more drained than he’d been before as well as anxious and a bit sickened. He went to his own bedroom to wait for Logan.

  Chapter 20

Logan let out a slow breath as his father closed the door behind him. That could have been very, very bad. He turned his attention to Virgil and Patton. Patton had curled himself around Virgil as much as physically possible and had tucked the boy’s head under his chin.

Logan slowly rounded the bed and knelt in front of them. “It’s alright,” Logan said, cautiously moving to put a hand on his shoulder. Virgil didn’t pull away. “I asked him to leave. It’s alright.”

Virgil tilted his head slightly too look at him. Logan rubbed a circle into his back as he slowly got control of his breath.

 Logan smiled softly at him and reached out to touch his cheek with a gentle hand. “You… didn’t hurt him. You didn’t even try to hurt him.”

Virgil shook his head.

“Why not?” Logan asked curiously. “It was a perfect opportunity.”

“Promised Patton,” Virgil mumbled, and the idea that perhaps the thing that had saved his father’s life was a pinky promise just about gave Logan a migraine, but then Virgil ducked his head. “And it would make you sad.”

“I see,” Logan said, heart in his throat.

Virgil kept looking towards the floor, his eyes starting to fill with tears again. “Are you going to turn me in now?”

 He was shaking and barely holding back a fresh wave of tears. Logan knew of course that no one would hurt him here if he turned him in to his father and the guards, but he also knew that Virgil would be terrified if he did so. He was already terrified. Logan didn’t want to know what he thought the fate Logan would be condemning him to.

“No,” Logan said before he could even truly think it through. “No, I’m not.”

“You’re not?” Virgil asked.

“Well, there wouldn’t really be a point, would there?” Logan asked. “The reason we planned to turn you when father got back in is because you posed a danger to him, but you have just demonstrated that is no longer an issue.”

 “Really?” Virgil asked, sniffling a bit and Logan saw Patton’s arms tighten even more around him.

“We will have to figure out a better cover for you than just that you’re new to the castle, but I believe it will work fine. No one besides the two of us would ever guess your origin anyway.”

“S-so I can stay?” Virgil asked, “and you won’t throw me into prison or execute me?”

“I promise you were never going to be executed Virgil,” Logan said. “Even if we turned you in, but yes you can stay with us. We’ll figure out a backstory for you that doesn’t involve assassinations and you’ll have to keep up the lie, but I doubt anyone will question it.”

 “I’ll do whatever you want,” Virgil said, chocked up. “Thank you. I really didn’t want to go.”

“Well, you’re our friend now so there will be no going anywhere,” Patton said kissing him on the cheek. Virgil relaxed back into his hold, pleased with the affection.

Logan smiled at them both. “Can I see your wrists, Virgil?”

Virgil blinked but offered them and Logan tapped the restraints doing a quick incantation. They popped off after a moment.

“You’re letting me go?” Virgil asked, eyes wide.

“Of course,” Logan said. “We’re not just going to keep you prisoner for no reason.”

 “That’s…” Virgil said, eyes watering as he clearly was trying not to cry. “You’re the best people I’ve ever met.”

“I wish that was not so clearly the case,” Logan replied. He slowly reach up and set a hand on his shoulder. “I’m going to go speak with my father. Patton will stay with you.”

“Okay,” Virgil agreed, seeming a bit hesitant.

Logan smiled softly and leaned forward to gently touch their foreheads together. “I will be right back,” he assured. “We will finish our slumber party, though perhaps we will table the rest of the dress up activity for another night.”

 He stood then, leaving Virgil in Patton’s capable hands to exit his own bedroom and cross the hallway to his father’s. He took a brief moment to compose himself before knocking on the door.

“Come in,” his father called.

Logan opened the door to see his father sitting on one of the armchairs in his room. Despite the almost disaster that had taken place a few minutes ago, Logan found himself smiling at the man. It was nice to have him home.

“Sorry about that,” Father said.

“It was more my fault than yours. If I knew there was a risk of you coming home today, I wouldn’t have left him alone.”

 “Is he alright?”

“I believe so,” Logan answered. “Patton is with him and will certainly smooth out any lingering distress.”

“Good,” his dad said. “That’s good.” There was a pause and then he gestured at the seat beside his.

Logan settled himself down on it. “How was your trip?” he asked. “You’re back a week early.”

“Yes,” Father said. “The trip went better and worse than anticipated.

“How so?” asked Logan curiously.

“Well,” Dad said. “The purpose of the trip was to convince the new queen of Lamir, Cecil not to ally with Mocnejsi, but by the time I’d arrived there wasn’t really a risk of that.”

 “Why not?”

“After investigation, it turned out that Cecil’s mother had been poisoned by an assassin from Mocnejsi.”

“Oh,” Logan said, mind already racing.

“They figured out that one of the young women who had been hired on in the kitchen for the winter had done it, and had learned her origin when they questioned her,” Dad informed him. “Considering Cecil was immediately approached for an alliance with Mocnejsi, their aim was likely to manipulate her going forward because of how young she is. Luckily, Cecil is a smart girl and has the help of her mother’s advisor as well as her own. By the time I got there, my only real role was to extend my condolences and reaffirm out alliance. I would have stayed longer, but the possibility that Mocnejsi may think to attack us in a similar way hastened me home.”

 “That…” Logan said. “That is wise. I assume you are going to institute more security.”

“I am, yes,” Dad replied. “I would like your input on plans in the coming day.”

“Of course,” Logan agreed.

Dad smiled at him, “But for now,” he said, “I think it’s time you get back to your slumber party and I get to finally go to sleep.”

Logan nodded and got to his feet. He leaned over to hug his father perhaps a bit longer and harder than was strictly necessary, but Dad did not seem to mind at all. “Goodnight,” Logan said.

“Goodnight, son.”

  Chapter 21

Virgil woke with something soft but kind of stringy in his face. That was weird. He didn’t know what in the closet would feel like that. In fact, as he woke more he noticed more things that he couldn’t sus out the origin of, particularly the warmth curled up against his side. Curious, he blinked open his eyes. Oh, right. Patton.

The soft stuff in his face was Patton’s hair and the warmth next to Virgil was the rest of the boy’s body. Patton had all but refused to let Virgil go last night after Logan had taken off the restraints and Virgil hadn’t minded the attention. They must have fallen asleep together in the piles of pillows and blankets on the floor.

 Virgil brushed his hair gently away, internally (for fear of disturbing him) shaking his head at him. He’d fallen asleep hallway on top of an assassin. He had no self-preservation instincts. He looked at his wrists. It seemed no one had any self-preservation instincts. This of course, included himself as instead of running off when free in case they decided to turn him in after all, he had fallen asleep on the floor with Patton too.

He looked to the side and saw Logan was already awake, reading on one of his chairs. He seemed to sense Virgil’s eyes on him because he looked up after a moment.

 “You can get up if you like,” Logan said. “He is a heavy sleeper and won’t wake up if you squirm out of his grip.”

Virgil frowned, unsure if he wanted to risk it.

“I have breakfast ready for you.”

Okay, Virgil was going to risk it.

He carefully squirmed out of Patton’s grip, leaning down to press a kiss to his forehead in apology for leaving him before getting to his feet.

Logan handed him a plate of eggs and toast when he walked over and gestured to the chair next to him. Virgil sat there to eat while Logan continued to read.

 Virgil ate his food quickly, and then glanced over at Logan once he was done. Virgil was honestly at a bit of a loss. Usually, they came and got him out of the closet only once they were ready to do something, but Patton was still sound asleep on the floor and Logan looked engrossed in his book.

Virgil fidgeted slightly, unsure what he should be doing or even if he should be doing anything. Considering Logan hadn’t given him any instructions, he should probably not do anything. He didn’t want to screw up the first day of… whatever this was now.

 Logan glanced over at him after a few minutes. “Don’t forget about the potion,” he reminded.

Virgil nodded and stood, walking over to the closet since it would still be in there from the previous morning. It was about half gone now and it had gotten to the point where Virgil didn’t feel any immediate affects from it anymore other than some warmth. It basically just felt like drinking tea.

He said as much to Logan when he walked back over to him.

“That’s good,” Logan said, “it means it has been working. It has healed any damage it can from malnutrition. Any internal organs that were damaged should be mostly healed. You may even notice your eyesight getting slightly better. Your immune system should also be boosted. You will likely also find it is easier to gain muscle and while you likely will never be as tall as you could have been, you will likely still grow a few inches during your next growth spirt.”

 Virgil studied his hands where they were sitting on his thigh now as though he could see the changes that allegedly had already taken place in his body. “Thank you,” he said quietly.

“Of course,” Logan replied, eyes already back on his book like it was some normal thing and not a huge kindness he’d bestowed on Virgil before even really knowing him. As though Virgil didn’t just owe him more than just his life going forward.

They sat in silence then for a few more minutes, before the was a soft sigh from the floor and Patton started to wake. He sat up and looked around. His eyes landed on both Virgil and Logan sitting together and he seemed to light up.

 “Good morning!” he chirped.

“Good morning, Patton,” Logan said as Patton popped to his feet, “I have breakfast for you.”

“Thank you Lo,” Patton said, throwing his arms around Logan’s neck, and giving him a kiss on the cheek. Virgil presumed from the lack of surprise on Logan’s face that this was normal for morning Patton, not that the fact surprised him considering how night Patton acted.

He still managed to be somewhat surprised by the fact that Patton turned to hug Virgil a second later. Patton’s lips were pressed briefly to Virgil’s head and then he turned to grab the plate Logan had saved for him.

 “So, what are we doing today?” Patton asked.

“I was thinking Virgil and I could continue our reading lessons if he is not opposed,” Logan said. Virgil nodded, happy with that prospect. “Other than that, I have no plans. I have already spoken with my father before the two of you woke. He is going to spend most of his day catching up on things he missed and said I could take the rest of the day off royal duties.”

“A whole day to relax then!” Patton said, happily chewing on his toast. “Reading sounds fun, but we should do something more active too.”

 Logan hummed. “We can show Virgil the courtyard after the reading lessons,” he said.

It took a moment for it to register, but then Virgil froze. “Wait,” he said. “We’re going outside?”

Logan raised an eyebrow at him. “Yes.”

“So, we’re leaving your room?”

“Are you alright with that?” Logan asked cautiously.

Virgil nodded quickly.

“Oh,” Patton said at his enthusiasm. “I guess you have been cooped up a while, haven’t you?” He smiled sadly and turned to Logan. “Maybe we can do reading lessons in the garden.”

“That would be satisfactory.”

“Great!” Patton said. He looked over at Virgil. “If we’re going out, we should probably put your hair up and get you in some clean clothes.”

 Logan nodded. “You finish eating, and I will help Virgil find something to wear.”

Logan found him an outfit, though it was a bit baggy on Virgil and the hem of the shirt went halfway to his knees. When Patton finished breakfast, he sat Virgil down and carefully worked a brush through his hair.

“Can I braid it?” Patton asked.

Virgil hummed his consent. Having his hair brushed and done up by another person was a lot more enjoyable than he’d anticipated. He’d liked it when Logan did it the night before, though he had to very firmly push away thoughts of where that led.

 “Okay!” Patton said after a few moments. “You look good. Ready to go?”

Virgil nodded and they both led him out into the hall. He paused before they got to the door. “What about the guards?” he asked hesitantly.

“I’ve already given them the same story as I did Dad,” Logan replied. “They know you’re here.”

Virgil still hesitated.

“It’s okay,” Patton promised. “Here, hold my hand?”

Virgil took the offered hand immediately, and Logan stepped in front of them both. Virgil felt himself relax a bit knowing the prince was between him and the guards.

They led him to the door.

 Logan greeted both of the guards at the door, and they said good morning back. Both of them glanced at Virgil curiously for a moment making him shrink into himself, but they quickly averted their gazes.

Patton pulled him past them without incident and soon they were in the small dining hall Virgil had passed through his first night here. He remembered how he’d snuck around at the edges of the room in the shadows with the aim to kill the king, but now he was being pulled through the middle with the prince having just wandered past the royal guards in broad daylight like it was nothing.

 It was so strange, and Virgil still couldn’t totally believe this was happening. The retraced his exact steps back down the spiral stairs near the kitchen and out of the door he and the nice gardener had came through. He could even see the shed he’d been hiding in from here. With a blink, he remembered they were going to the garden, and he wondered if he’d see the man again.

For now, he just looked around them as Logan and Patton led him past the garden shed towards an area with many trees. Orange and yellow leaves were starting to fall from many of the trees.

 They made a satisfying crunching sound under his feet as he was led to a tree. He had seen the group of trees when he’d first arrived here and had even thought about hiding amongst them instead of in the shed, but they’d seemed scary in the dark. They were pretty in the daylight, however, and Virgil found himself tilting his head to watch the branches sway in the slight wind.

Logan sat down under it and pulled out a book and some writing materials from the bag he’d brought. Virgil settled down next to him so they could both look at the book at the same time and Patton flopped down on the other side, immediately setting to work tying fancy knots in the yarn he’d brought with him. Patton shuffled slightly to the side so they bumped shoulders as Logan opened the book and started Virgil’s reading lesson.

  Chapter 22

Patton bit his lip to keep from laughing or awing. “Do you like the flower, Virgil?” he asked.

Virgil glanced up at him briefly and then his eyes returned to the flower he’d found. “It’s nice,” he said.

They’d finished the reading lessons and let Virgil explore the garden a bit. He’d found a dark purple and yellow flower (a pansy, Patton thought) and seemed to be endlessly fascinated by it. He’d been staring at it for minutes now, almost as though he expected it to do something. Patton did not quite understand his interest, but he was still adorable.

 Logan sat next to him and the flower, smiling at him softly. “I imagine you’ll enjoy the garden in the spring,” Logan said. “There are many more flowers then. Of all types. We’ll have to show you all of the best spots. Mr. Deknis has a particularly good eye for colors, and it is always quite beautiful.”

“Who is Mr. Deknis?” Virgil asked.

“He’s the head gardener,” Logan said. “He’s a nice man, though a bit prickly when it comes to his garden. We may see him today if he’s in this part of the garden.”

“Would he have been the multrum I saw in the gardening shed when I hid there?”

 “Ah, yes, that would be him. I was unaware you interacted with anyone in the castle.”

“He caught me in his garden shed, but he wasn’t mean,” Virgil said, he tilted his head curiously at Logan. “Why…” he trailed off.

“Yes?” Logan asked.

“Why is he the gardener?”

Logan looked confused, “Well,” he said, “I guess because he wants to and is good at it.”

“No,” Virgil said with a frown. “I mean. Shouldn’t he… he’s…”

Logan seemed to think hard for a moment. “Right,” he said. “You’ve been under a blood compulsion. I’d guess you would have only worked with multrums in the military.”

 “I guess I didn’t realize that they could be other things…”

“Of course, they can,” Logan said. “Their abilities don’t make them any less of people. Mr. Deknis likes to garden so he gardens.”

Virgil blinked at him.

“…Of course, all things considered, that may not be a familiar concept to you.” Virgil turned back to look at the flower instead of answering. “Right,” said Logan.

There were a couple of awkward beats of silence. Patton bit his lip and happened to glance up. “Oh,” he said. “Speaking of Mr. Deknis.” He gestured to the gardener who was coming up the path between the trees.

 Logan sat up on his knees as Patton waved at him. He saw Patton and turned to walk towards them. “The two of you had better not be up to mischief in my garden,” Mr. Deknis called, his voice a bit gruff. He clearly did not see Virgil who had laid flat on his stomach to stare at the flower.

Logan rolled his eyes automatically. “We were just reading Mr. Deknis,” he said. “Your piles of dirt are safe.”

“No mud cakes?” Mr. Deknis asked skeptically still coming towards them.

“It has been a literal decade…”

Patton saw when Mr. Deknis was close enough to see Virgil.

 He stopped in his track and looked down at Virgil who was already watching him a bit warily. “Hello,” he said, his voice a lot softer than it’d been a few moments before. His expression completely flipped in a moment to something very gentle when he saw Virgil and the cautious look on his face. Virgil did seem to have that effect on people.

“Hi,” Virgil replied.

Mr. Deknis looked at Logan and then at Patton and then back at Virgil. “This is our new friend, Virgil,” Patton offered.

“Hello, Virgil,” Mr. Deknis said with a nod.

“Virgil, this is the gardener Mr. Deknis.”

 “He’s not nearly as grumpy as he sounds,” Patton assured.

“Well,” Logan said, “yes he is.”

Mr. Deknis shot him a look that only served to prove Logan’s point if Patton was being honest. Logan just smiled back. Mr. Deknis apparently decided to let it slide because he turned back to Virgil.

“It’s good to see you again,” Mr. Deknis said. “Are you feeling better?”

Virgil nodded. “I’m a lot better,” he said. Mr. Deknis considered him for a moment, clearly reading how true that statement was. Patton was glad he seemed satisfied with the answer.

“I see you’ve met these two.”

 “Yeah,” Virgil said.

Mr. Deknis smiled slightly. “Be careful with this one,” he said, pointing to Logan. “He’s a bad influence.”

Virgil frowned in confusion. “He’s the prince,” he pointed out.

“And a bad influence,” Mr. Deknis repeated. “He’s a beacon of irresponsibility and mischief and he corrupts that one,” he nodded to Patton.

“I am completely responsible,” Logan replied.

“Need I remind you of the cucumber incident.”

“I was 8,” Logan said.

“I know how old you were,” Mr. Deknis replied, “and you are hardly any older.”

“I resent that.”

Mr. Deknis just smiled and turned back to Virgil who was watching the interaction with pure curiosity.

 “I just picked a few more of those apples for Patton’s mom to make into apple sauce. Would you kids like some?”

Virgil glanced over at Logan and Patton.

“That would be nice, thank you,” Patton replied for them all, standing up. Seeing that, Virgil also climbed to his feet.

“It’s back this way,” Mr. Deknis said, inclining hid head back the way he’d came and then turning to lead them that way. Patton followed him. He glanced back to see Logan put his hand on Virgil’s shoulder and give him a gentle push to get him going. “So, what are you kids up to today?”

 “We wanted to show Virgil the garden and courtyard,” Patton said. “He’s been cooped up inside for a bit.”

“I see,” Mr. Deknis said. He glanced back at Virgil. “Feel free to come out in the garden anytime you like. As long as you don’t go about purposefully destroying stuff, I don’t mind you being out here.”

“I won’t destroy anything,” Virgil promised instantly.

“Well I hope you manage to keep that attitude even while befriending the large upright groundhog behind you.”

Virgil looked a little bit nervous. “He’s just teasing Virgil,” Patton assured. “He loves Logan.”

Mr. Deknis glanced back again and seemed to read the same thing Patton had read on Virgil’s face.

 “Yes, of course,” Mr. Deknis said. “I have simply known the prince for a long time and joke with him in that way often. Logan is aware of that.”

“Indeed,” Logan agreed, his hand squeezing a bit on Virgil’s shoulder. Virgil relaxed a touch.

Mr. Deknis stopped and reached down into a bucket next to a tree. “I wouldn’t offer my apples to people I don’t like,” he said, tossing an apple underhand to Logan. Instead of trying to catch it, his eyes widened and he dodged out of the way.

“You would however throw apples at them despite knowing they have never been able to catch things.”

 Mr. Deknis just rolled his eyes fondly, but Virgil frowned and turned to Logan. “You don’t know how to catch things?” he asked scandalized. “You should know how to catch things. What if someone throws a knife at you?”

Mr. Deknis looked… probably the right amount of concerned about that statement coming from a 14-year-old’s lips.

“Haha, yeah,” Patton said awkwardly. “Maybe you can teach Logan how to catch things Virgil, but later. Right now, why don’t we just get the apples and then show you the courtyard.”

Virgil was still frowning, but he did not argue with Patton’s suggestion.

 Thankfully, Mr. Deknis did not push, though Patton did have to dodge many a meaningful side eye. He might… need to make sure he did not get cornered by the gardener in the coming days… or brush up on his lying without lying skills.

For now, though, he just handed out the apples, not tossing them this time. Virgil thanked him softly and Patton could see the way the usually fairly gruff man went all melty at that. He even slipped an extra apple to Virgil for later which Virgil perked up at.

Patton and Logan pulled him away gently after that so Mr. Deknis could go back to work, but Virgil seemed happy with the apples and copied Patton at waving goodbye to him cheerfully.

Despite the fact that he liked Mr. Deknis and he’d been nice, Patton still took a calming breath when they were no longer at risk of lying about something and getting caught by the man’s powers. They went back into the castle towards the courtyard.

  Chapter 23

Logan was unsurprised that after showing Virgil the large courtyard, Patton almost immediately decided to instigate a game of tag. They were, after all, here with the goal of getting Virgil a bit active after having had him only in Logan’s room for weeks.

He was also unsurprised that Virgil seemed confused about the concept of tag, and Patton had to explain the game in detail to him.

It made him wince, but he still was unsurprised when Virgil went about inquiring after the consequences of losing the game.

He was, however, very surprised when, after getting all of the facts about tag settle, Patton was chasing after Virgil trying to tag him and suddenly the boy disappeared.

 Patton almost ran into a wall in his confusion. He stared at his hands stretched out and just a couple of inches from touching the wall for a moment, before slowly looking up.

“Virgil!” Patton exclaimed. “What?”

“What?” he asked.

“…What are you even hanging onto?”

“The wall,” Virgil replied.

Logan walked closer to the two of them and tilted his head up to look at him. Virgil had jumped up and somehow managed to find hand and foot holes on the seemingly smooth wall. He climbed about 5 meters above their heads and was peering down at them curiously.

 “Okay,” Logan said. “New rule. Virgil is not allowed to scale walls during tag.”

Virgil frowned down at him. “Why only me?”

“Because Patton and I cannot do that anyway,” Logan said. “We would not be able to actually play if you remain up there.”

Patton glanced over at him and reached over to touch Logan’s shoulder. “No tag backs,” he said. Logan glared at him. “Why don’t you come down sweetie?”

“But Logan will tag me,” he said.

“Well, honey, that’s part of the fun,” Patton reasoned. “Don’t you want to try being it?”

Virgil seemed to consider this for a long moment. “Okay,” he agreed.

 To Logan’s terror, he simply let go of the wall, falling straight down and landing crouched. He blinked at Logan. Right. With a start, Patton took off, so he’d have a head start. “No tag backs means a 10 second head start for me,” Logan reminded. Virgil nodded, and Logan reached out to poke him in the arm before immediately running off in the opposite direction as Patton.

Logan’s strategy worked out since, knowing he couldn’t go after Logan for a few seconds more, he chose to turn and go after Patton. After finding one of the statues to hide behind on the edge of the courtyard, Logan risked glancing back.

 Virgil was faster than Logan (and likely Patton) had accounted for. Patton had gotten a good head start on him, but Virgil closed it quickly. Patton shrieked as Virgil barreled into him, bringing them both to the ground.

“Virgil!” Logan heard Patton giggle. Logan figured he was more than okay despite the tackle. “This isn’t how you play tag!”

“I combined tag and tackle hugs,” Virgil declared, making Patton giggle more.

“That’s very innovative, honey,” Patton said. “Now are you going to let me up?...Virgil… I’m counting down your 10 second head start in my head, and if you don’t let me up I’m going to tag you again.”

 This did not seem to have the intended effect as Virgil did not remove himself from Patton’s person. Patton laugh when it became clear he was not going to move and began counting down “7, 6, 5, 4, you’d better let me go sweetie, or you’re going to get tagged again.” Virgil did not seem to care. “3, 2, 1.” Patton reached up and bopped him on the nose. “Tag!” he declared.

Logan was surprised when Virgil instantly jumped off Patton at that. He whipped around.

‘Oh,’ Logan thought as the boy’s eyes narrowed in on Logan immediately, ‘I see.’

 “Virgil was already halfway across the courtyard towards him before Logan could even think about running away. There was no way that he was fast enough to outrun him. Perhaps he could outthink him, he thought. His eyes scanned his environment in the seconds he had left and landed on a large square piece of stone that held flowers in the spring. It was just full of dirt now, but it was still about waist high. Perhaps if he kept that between them, he could outmaneuver him. He sprinted towards it and scrambled to the opposite side from where Virgil was heading.

 He really should not have been as surprised as he was that Virgil did not even slightly slow as he approached the planter box, instead grabbing ahold of the side of it and vaulting over it. Logan stumbled back, bracing for impact, but instead he just got a quick tap on the shoulder.

Logan blinked at him.

“I don’t know if you would be okay with tackle hugs,” he explained.

Logan considered him. “I would be okay with a nontackle hug.”

Virgil happily jumped forward to hug Logan, pressing his nose into Logan’s shoulder. Logan chuckled and patted the top of his head. “Six,” he said, “5, 4, 3…”

 Virgil bolted away suddenly, actually making Logan stumble a bit. He paused just out of reach of Logan, looking at him with anticipation. “2,1,” Logan finished with a raised eyebrow. He already knew he was being played with, but he indulged him by starting towards him. Virgil danced out of the way, eyes alight. Logan sighed. “Is this truly how it’s going to be?” he asked.

Virgil didn’t answer, but to watch him with wide, excited eyes.

“Fine,” Logan said. He dashed towards him again, only to have him continue to maneuver just out of Logan’s reach each time Logan went forward. He’d call it taunting if there was any sign of malice in it.

 They ran around the courtyard in spirts of Logan charging at him and Virgil expertly dodging. Eventually Patton came closer to them. Logan could tell that Virgil was aware of his presence, by how he glanced back at him briefly, but considering he was not ‘it,’ it seemed he chose to disregard him. However, he was not aware of the way Patton winked at Logan as he walked up behind Virgil.

Logan, on the other hand, knew exactly what was happening. He went to spring for Virgil again, and Virgil again moved to dodge, but this time Patton grabbed him around the waist, allowing Logan to actually tag him.

 He turned slowly to face Patton who started to giggle immediately at the perplexed look on his face. It cleared into something else as soon as he heard Patton laugh. “Traitor!” he claimed. “We were on the same team and you betrayed me.”

“I just thought we should probably have mercy on poor Logan,” Patton replied.

“Hmm,” Virgil said, eyes again full of that playful mischief Logan had not seen until today. “Plea for mercy not accepted.”

Patton once again half-shrieked half-laughed as he was pounced on. The two of them went rolling across the grass, Virgil clearly keeping the rolling going longer than it should have as they made it a good few meters.

 Virgil sprung off of him a few moments later.

“Oh, is it my turn?” Patton inquired with a huge smile. He slowly got to his feet. “Hmm, I’m probably at about 5, 4, 3, 2, 1!” He took off after Virgil, but Patton had a bit more endurance than Logan, so instead of doing quickly calculated lunges at Virgil as Logan had done, he just ran at him full tilt without stopping.

Virgil ran from him, though Logan was pretty sure he was intentionally slowing himself down a bit so Patton had some amount of a chance. He kept turning to check behind him and make sure Patton was still somewhat close as he ran.

Which is why he didn’t see the imminent disaster in time.

  Chapter 24

Thomas should have been paying more attention, but his mind had been on the meeting he’d just had with the castle guards about increased security in the wake of the possible threat from Mocnejsi. He’d decided to take a brief walk around the courtyard to clear his head but was still distracted with mulling over the options that had just been presented to him. He stepped into the castle courtyard and did not have time to step out of the way of the much smaller body rocketing towards him. Virgil slammed into his front, but not before Thomas got a good look at his face.

 Virgil’s expression changed dramatically in the few seconds between him registering Thomas was there and running into him. For the briefest moment, Thomas could see that he must have been having a lot of fun. He’d caught the wide smile and sparkling eyes as Virgil turned his head back from looking at Patton who was chasing him across the greenery. He’d looked very happy which made it all the more painful to see that happiness die in and a few instants. When his head had turned back towards Thomas, there was a flicker of confusion at something being in his path.

 Then, clearly everything about the situation registered, because his eyes blew wide in horror as he tried to stop himself, but there was no way he’d be able to in time. Thomas saw that fact register on his face the moment before he hit. Gone was any trace of happiness or joy in that split second. All that was left was dread that had no place anywhere near a children’s game of tag. It was the expression Thomas would expect from someone who felt ice give way under their feet in the middle of a lake they had thought was frozen solid.

 He hit hard, but he wasn’t nearly big enough to actually harm Thomas. Thomas was thrown slightly off balance but managed to stay on his feet. He reached out a hand to his shoulder automatically to steady the child. There was a moment of pseudo calm where they both absorbed the impact and stilled.

Then, the boy’s shoulder slipped out of Thomas’s grip as he went crashing to the ground in a move that made Thomas wince for the state of his knees. Thomas couldn’t quite grasp what was happening for a moment as Virgil face planted onto the ground in front of him, but when he did, Thomas couldn’t help but flinch and take a step back from him.

 Thomas had been bowed to before, of course, seeing as he was a king, but this was not out of respect or courtesy or even just tradition. This was out of terror. He was begging for mercy and it made Thomas feel sick.

“I’m sorry,” he said, meek and shaky into the ground, and there was almost something worse about the fact that he did not beg for forgiveness with his words, but only his posture. The way his breathes came far too quick and shallow said he was likely on the verge of a panic attack, but he was not blubbering through apologies or even not speaking at all. He gave a clear, if shaky, apology, and waited for whatever he thought Thomas planned to do to him. There was no way that was not learned.

 “You don’t…” Thomas stuttered. “You don’t have to do that. It’s okay.”

“I’m sorry,” he said again, but he reacted in no other way. He did not even react when Patton made it to his side and knelt down next to him. Patton’s hand hovered over his back, clearly wanting to touch down, but he pulled back on that instinct.

“Virgil, honey,” he said softly. “It’s okay. No one is mad. It was an accident.”

Virgil did not react to this at all.

Thomas caught Logan’s eye as he hurried over to them himself. “Sorry,” Thomas mouthed. Logan just nodded and turned his attention to his friend.

 “There is no reason for any of that,” Logan said, his voice firm, almost clipped. “You are not in trouble. Now sit up.”

Virgil did respond to that, slowly shifting back on his knees. He kept his head down looking at the ground. “Sorry,” he said again.

“I…” Thomas said, surveying the three kids on the ground in front of him. Thomas slowly sunk to the ground to be at their level. Virgil was tracking his movements out of the corner of his eyes, his head still bowed and his shoulders tensed. “Hey,” Thomas said softly. “Were you three playing tag?”

 Virgil hesitated, eyes flickering as he debated whether he should respond or not.

“Yeah, we were,” Patton answered for him after a moment of stressful silence.

“Well that’s fun,” Thomas said. “I’m sorry for interrupting the three of you. I wasn’t watching where I was going.”

Virgil glanced up at him for just a moment before looking away again. Patton apparently felt it was safe enough to touch Virgil, because he settled a hand on the boys shoulder.

“Yeah, we’ve just been having a fun day,” Patton said, carefully matching Thomas’s light tone. “We went to the garden and did some reading. Then, Mr. Deknis gave us some apples.”

 “That’s nice,” Thomas replied. “He’s been talking about the new apples he’s been growing. He’s been working on them for years and they’re just beginning to bare fruit this year. I haven’t gotten a chance to try any yet. Are they any good?”

“They’re very good,” Patton told him. His hand rubbed slowly on Virgil’s back. “Isn’t that right, Virge?”

Virgil nodded a bit, a little less tense now, but still nowhere near calm.

“Well, I’ll have to try them soon,” Thomas said with a smile. “Thank you for the information. Now, I’ve got to get back to what I’m doing, but I hope you three have a good day.”

 “I’ll see you later, Dad,” Logan said.

Thomas nodded and pushed himself to his feet. “Goodbye you three,” he said before turning away towards the door back into the castle. He paused to take a breath when the door closed behind him, cutting off the courtyard. There were a lot of thoughts to shirt through in regards to that conversation. He hated that Virgil was so obviously terrified of him. Both of their two interactions had ended with the poor thing panicking on the ground. He wished he had some idea of how to help him or at least someone to talk to about it.

Maybe he’d go visit Mr. Deknis himself and not just for the apples.

  Chapter 25

“Alright,” Patton said, pressing a kiss to Virgil’s forehead. “I’ve got to go back to my room for the night. Will you two be okay?”

“We’ll be fine,” Logan said. “It won’t be particularly different than the last two weeks.”

Patton nodded and leaned to the side to squeeze Virgil in another hug. He’d been clingy since the incident in the courtyard, and Virgil had been appreciative considering he was still pretty shaky from it. He was still surprised he’d touched the king of Prijaznia (let alone ran into him) and lived to tell the tale.

“Goodnight, Pat,” Virgil said because he was pretty sure he wouldn’t leave if Virgil didn’t.

 “Night Virge,” Patton said with a smile before standing up from where they’d been sitting on the ground. He reached over to hug Logan who was sitting on a chair. “Night Lo! Put the book down and go to bed.”

Logan looked up from his book with a frown.

“It’s almost midnight,” Patton scolded.

Logan sighed and set his book down. “Very well,” he agreed. “We will get ready for bed.”

“You better! I’m going to come and wake you up early in the morning.”

“Early in the morning for you is 9am,” Logan scoffed.

Patton stuck his tongue out at him as he walked backwards out of the door.

 Logan gave his book a mournful look once the door closed and Virgil almost giggled. “I won’t tell on you,” he said.

Logan thought about it for a few moments. “No,” he finally said. “We should probably get some sleep.”

Virgil nodded and pushed himself to his feet.

“We should probably both take a bath after sitting in the dirt today,” Logan said. “Do you want to go first or should I?”

“Don’t care,” Virgil answered.

“You can go first,” Logan offered.

Virgil felt himself smile. “You just want to finish the chapter in that book,” he accused.

“Perhaps,” Logan conceded.

 Virgil just grinned and walked over to his closet to grab one of the outfits he’d been given for pajamas. He chose a pair of baggy shorts that went past his knees and the huge soft black sweater Logan had found in the back of his closet. He headed into the bathroom, noting Logan had already picked up his book again.

Logan may have declared the both of them dirty enough for bathing a few minutes before, but Virgil was cleaner than he thought he’d ever been before coming to the castle. Logan had taught him how to use the tub and what soaps to use for what a couple of days after he’d arrived and had suggested he clean himself regularly.

 Virgil didn’t mind. The tub was enchanted to warm the water inside of it and Virgil loved it. Though, that had the negative affect of making it very difficult to leave.

He cleaned himself up quickly, so he’d have a few minutes to just sit in the water before he felt like he needed to get out and let Logan have a turn. He changed into his pajamas, pulling the crescent shaped protection charm out of his day clothes pocket and storing the warm to the touch stone in the short pocket. He used the clip Patton had made it to pin it to the cloth to make sure he wouldn’t lose it.

 Logan was engrossed in his reading by the time that Virgil exited the bathroom. He did not look up as Virgil approached.

“Your turn,” Virgil said to him.

Logan clearly just barely managed to tear his eyes away from the book. “Right,” he said. “Yes.”

“The book will be there in the morning,” Virgil reminded.

“I know,” said Logan sadly as he set the book aside.

Logan never took much time in the bath, so Virgil quickly went about getting ready for bed the rest of the way. He put his day clothes in the basket Logan had for that purpose and started to straighten out the blankets and pillows in the closet.

 He heard Logan come back into the room a few minutes later.

“Virgil,” Logan said. “What are you doing?”

Virgil looked over at him. “Getting ready for bed,” he answered, confused.

Logan frowned at him. “You don’t sleep in the closet anymore,” Logan said. “That’s only for when we were worried you might escape.”

“Oh,” Virgil said blinking over at him. “Right.” He felt a slight pulling at his chest. He liked the closet. It was warm and soft. Patton had taken a lot of care with how he’d arranged all of the pillows and blankets. It was the best place he could ever remember having to sleep in his life. Yet, he did not argue. He knew getting to sleep out in the open was supposed to be a reward and he wasn’t about to reject it.

 Virgil stood and closed the closet. He tugged on the bottom of his sweater, stretching the fabric between his hands as he watched Logan pull down the covers of his bed and settle down onto it. Cautiously he walked over towards the bed. He wasn’t sure where he should lay down exactly. He dithered for a moment before bending down to sit on the floor near the right side of Logan’s bed and then laying down.

There was shuffling on the bed above him and then Logan’s head popped over the side to squint down at him. “On the bed Virgil,” he said.

 Virgil looked up at him in shock. “But it… I’m…” He trailed off and there were a few seconds of silence.

“It is just a bed Virgil,” Logan said.

But it wasn’t ‘just’ anything. Virgil was pretty sure touching the bed of a royal family member without permission would be considered a capital offence. At least, it would in Mocnejsi. Yet, Logan was expecting him to just… crawl into it?

“Please just get up here,” Logan said. Virgil’s caution at touching something he was definitely sure he should not be allowed to be touching wared with his resolve to repay his literal life debt to Logan by doing whatever he wanted.

 Feeling honestly a bit sick to his stomach, Virgil slowly pushed himself back to his feet. Logan scooted back over to the left side of the bed, and Virgil cautiously sat down on the empty side of the bed. After a second of hesitation he slowly laid down, his head hitting a soft fluffy pillow. He jumped when Logan flopped the covers on top of both of them.

Virgil took a long moment to absorb the situation while Logan took off his glasses and reached over to turn off the light next to him. He’d never slept in a bed before, or if he had he’d been too young to remember. In the orphanage there was a lack of actual beds due to overcrowding and there had always been someone bigger and stronger that Virgil didn’t dare fight for the use of them. During training, none of the kids had a bed. Only a few of the higher ups had ones at the more permanent training sites. There were very few situations where any of the assassins, at least a Virgil’s level, would be allowed to touch a real bed.

 The light switched off, plunging them into darkness.

“Is this…?” Virgil said, eyes still pointed towards the ceiling even though his eyes had not adjusted to the darkness enough to be able to see it. “Do you want… things?”

“Things?” Logan asked.

Virgil did not move his head, but he did reach over and put his hand slightly above Logan’s knee. Logan didn’t move, so Virgil slid his hand up.

Virgil’s wrist was grabbed immediately and pulled firmly away from Logan’s inner thigh. He did not let go afterwards, his fingers squeezing hard, but not quite painfully. “Never,” Logan said, his voice harsher than it had ever been even on the day when Virgil was nothing more than an intruder with deadly intent. “Never offer anything like that to anyone ever again.”

 “I was just…”

“I know what you were doing,” Logan said, voice icy, “and it inadmissible. Never offer that again for anything. Do you understand me?”

“I... yes.”

“Promise me.”

Virgil took a short moment to think. “I promise,” he agreed.

“Good,” Logan said, releasing his hand. His voice got softer too. “Good.”

They were silent for a long time after that, though Virgil had no delusions that Logan had fallen asleep. He could almost feel the tension.

“Sorry,” Virgil finally said softly.

“It’s not something you should be apologizing for,” Logan replied. The bed moved as Logan shifted and a hand lightly touched the top of his head. “Just… never.”

 “Okay,” Virgil said. He shifted slightly after a moment until his head was in the crook of Logan’s arm. Logan brushed the hair out of his face with the hand that had been on his head.

“Goodnight Virgil,” Logan said.

“Goodnight,” Virgil responded. They were quiet after that, though Virgil was still awake for a while yet and Logan’s hand slowly stroked through his hair for a while. Eventually though, Virgil relaxed into mattress. He stuck his hand into his pocket and curled it around the charm in his pocket. The bed was nice, he thought. It was soft and warm… and safe. He finally fell asleep.

  Chapter 26

Patton did their new special knock on the door so Logan and Virgil would know it was just him and they didn’t need to hide the fact that Virgil was sleeping in the prince’s room. He didn’t wait for a response, however, and just shoved open the door. He was surprised to see that Logan was not already out of bed and wondered for a moment if he had broken his promise stayed up way too late reading like he was sometimes known to do. Yet, then, Logan spoke from the bed. “I’m awake,” he called.

Confused, Patton stepped into the room. Logan wasn’t one for lazing around in bed; usually he was out of bed the moment he woke.

 He stepped over to the bed and had to stifle a smile when he recognized the problem. Logan was awake, but Virgil was still sleeping, and he was half on top of Logan, his arms wrapped around him.

“Why don’t you just squirm out of his arms like you do me?” Patton asked, keeping his voice low.

“He isn’t like you,” Logan said. He did not bother to quiet himself at all.

“What do you mean?” Patton asked amused.

In answer, Logan started to move as though to squirm out of Virgil’s death grip on him. In response, Virgil made a pitiful mewling sound in his sleep that landed like a piercing blow straight to the heart. Logan stopped moving immediately and Virgil shifted to grip Logan tighter.

 “Aw!” Patton said.

“It’s not cute,” Logan insisted. “I’ve been stuck for hours and I have to pee.”

Patton chuckled. “Alright, alright, I’ll save you.” He rounded the bed to Virgil’s side and crawled up on it. “Virgil, honey,” he entreated softly. “I think it’s time for me to get cuddles so Lo can get up.” Patton softly touched Virgil’s shoulder and pulled at him gently. He reached forward to carefully pry Virgil’s arms off of Logan.

Virgil made a more confused than heartbreaking sound this time, turning towards Patton so Patton could wrap his arms around him. Logan managed to scoot towards the edge of the bed.

39448

Logan made it off the bed and dashed towards the bathroom as Virgil’s arms came around Patton and squeezed. Patton laughed and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. After a few moments, Virgil’s eyes started to flicker a bit.

“Good morning, honey,” Patton said softly. “Did you sleep good?”

He hummed sleepily. “Beds are nice,” he said. Patton felt a slight pang at that because it implied he didn’t get to sleep in beds very much, but he chose to shove that aside.

“They are,” Patton agreed. Virgil’s eyes started to close again. “Honey,” Patton laughed. “I think it’s time to wake up now.”

 Virgil made a sleepy whining sound, squeezing Patton tighter. “Don’t you want breakfast?” Patton asked. That question managed to make Virgil open his eyes again. “I was thinking we could go down to the kitchen to eat that way it’s nice and fresh and I can introduce you to Mama real quick.” He neglected to mention the fact that they really did not have a choice. Mr. Deknis had blabbed to Mama about Virgil, and worse, had apparently mentioned that Virgil was skinny. As soon as he’d gotten home yesterday, he’d been met with an already worked up Mama firmly insisting that she meet Virgil sometime today.

 He wasn’t going to tell Virgil that though, because he thought it might scare him away from both Mama and Mr. Deknis.

Virgil thought about the prospect of breakfast for a long moment. “Fine,” he agreed. “I’ll be awake.”

“Good,” Patton said. He reached up to bop him on the nose. Virgil narrowed his eyes and then bopped him back making Patton giggle. He sat up then, and Virgil let him. “Let’s get you something to wear and do your hair,” Patton suggested. Virgil nodded and reluctantly got out of bed, just as Logan returned to the room. “We’re going to go downstairs for breakfast,” Patton told Logan. “That way Virgil can meet my mom.” He gave Logan a significant look and Logan nodded once in understanding that this was not a choice.

 Logan and Virgil got dressed, and Patton did Virgil’s hair up nice, before Patton led them out of the royal wing. They went down the main staircase instead of the spiral staircase that went right to the kitchen, mostly because it would be very busy, and Patton thought they should probably eat in the main dining room anyway. He could feel Virgil getting more anxious as they entered the busier part of the castle, and he stuck close to either Patton or Logan from the time they hit the top of the steps all the way to the main dining room.

 There were a few people in the dining room already eating breakfast when they arrived. Virgil’s curiosity seemed to temporarily overwhelm his anxiety as he looked around the large hall and at all of the people there. Patton looked around trying to see it through his eyes. He’d been running around this place since he was little, so he never really thought about how big the room was or how grandly it was decorated, but Virgil was just seeing it for the first time. Patton smiled at him as he guided him to one of the seats. There was already muffins on the table so Patton grabbed one and plopped it in front of Virgil.

 Virgil frowned down at the muffin dubiously. “You just… keep food out in the open?” he asked.

Right.

“It’s fine, Virgil,” Patton promised. “No one here would have put anything in it.”

Virgil narrowed his eyes and looked around at the other occupants of the room suspiciously.

“Honestly,” Logan said. “No one even knew we would be down here for breakfast. Nobody would just put something in random people’s food for no reason.”

Virgil gave him a look like he’d just told him people could in fact breathe under water. Virgil was really from a… whole different world, wasn’t he?

 “It’s really fine,” Patton said. “Logan and I have eaten things on the table like this a lot.”

“I’m surprised your not dead yet,” Virgil said.

Logan rolled his eyes and reached for a muffin. Virgil slapped it out of his hand and onto the floor. “Really?” Logan asked.

Virgil narrowed his eyes at him. “No eating unsecured food!”

“Virgil,” Logan groaned.

“I bet you don’t even know what common poisons taste like.”

“No,” Logan said. “I don’t because I don’t worry about being poisoned on a daily basis!”

“You should!”

People were starting to look over at them. Patton shot an awkward smile at the woman a few chairs down.

20285

“Just don’t eat the muffins Logan,” Patton said under his breath.

“I do not understand why-”

“Because it’s stupid as he-”

“Shush,” Patton commanded out of the corner of his mouth, “people are watching, and Virgil is just a normal castle resident.”

That shut the both of them up at least.

“No muffins for now,” Patton said. “I assume it’s okay to eat the things they bring straight from the kitchen.”

Virgil looked a bit leery of this still, but he nodded.

“Good,” Patton said, “then we’ll just wait for that to get here and then everyone will be happy, right?”

Logan opened his mouth and Patton turned to glare at him.

“Right?”

 Logan closed his mouth, though clearly, he did not want to give in so easily. They’d be doubtlessly rehashing this conversation once they were alone again.

Patton caught sight of one of the kitchen workers he knew fairly well come out of the kitchen and deliver food to a group of people who were there before them. She caught sight of them and walked over likely to ask them what they wanted for breakfast. Patton watched out of the corner of his eye as Virgil tensed, eyeing her approach suspiciously and she slowed under his glare.

This was going to be a long breakfast.

  Chapter 27

After an, honestly quite aggravating, breakfast full of Virgil’s cognitive distortions about the likelihood of being poisoned, Logan was relieved to finally be able to leave the dining area. In consideration to those serving breakfast, Patton did not lead them through the door in the back of the dining room that went directly to the kitchen, and instead took them out of the room and down the hall to a different entrance. This one had a guard stationed across from it as, despite what Virgil may believe, the castle workers did consider the possibility that someone would want to sneak into the kitchen for nefarious purposes.

 Said guard, of course, saw nothing wrong with the prince and the head chef’s son entering the side door even with the bonus stranger. In fact, he may even have known Virgil could be coming through this door if Ms. Heart had mentioned him.

Though Virgil hadn’t managed to catch it, Logan knew enough about Patton’s mother that he’d surmised that she had insisted Patton bring the boy to meet her. It was bound to happen at some point anyway, Logan knew, and he wasn’t particularly worried. After all, this was Patton’s mother. Virgil himself didn’t even seem particularly concerned.

 Logan had seen him panic and, while he tugged a bit at the sweater he was wearing, the motion was not particularly fervent, so he was likely just slightly nervous.

Of course, that may be because he did not know Patton’s mother specifically wanted to meet him and just assumed that they were starting the necessary process of introducing him to castle residents with a low risk person.

When they entered the hallway, Logan could already hear the usual noises of the kitchen: the clattering of plates, the bubble of conversation, and the sound of Ms. Heart’s voice calling out instructions.

 He did see Virgil hesitate, but Logan couldn’t sus out why and Patton was already ahead of them and opening the door into the kitchen. It was fairly calm for the kitchen considering it was meal hours. Logan imagined that Patton had chosen the time between when the day guards ate breakfast before their shifts and the night guards after their shifts on purpose. There was still a bit of chaos as dishwashers attempted to catch up during the lull and a few orders were still being made, but overall the mood seemed, to Logan at least, to be light as Ms. Heart ordered her kitchen around.

 Yet, Virgil clearly did not see the situation the same way that Logan did. He froze when the kitchen door swung open and some of the workers turned to look at them. He took a step back, bumped into Logan, startled violently, realized it was Logan, and then side stepped to hide behind him. Logan looked back at him in confusion, but Virgil said nothing, proceeding to mutely peer over Logan’s shoulder.

Patton had moved over to greet his mother as she wiped her hands off on a rag. She glanced over at Virgil and Logan and Logan saw Virgil shrink back a bit.

 Logan could see Ms. Heart’s eyes soften as she tracked his movement. She turned to the woman next to her and said something before moving to remove her apron and hang it up in its designated area. Virgil’s hands clenched in the fabric of Logan’s shirt when she turned back to him.

“It’s fine, Virgil,” Logan told him, but Virgil didn’t seem to believe him. Luckily, Patton had turned back and seemed to realize something was amiss.

He stepped back over to them. “Hey, honey,” he said. A plate clattered in the kitchen and Virgil just about ripped Logan’s shirt.

 Patton frowned sympathetically. “Too loud?”

“Virgil,” Logan said. “You are digging your fingernails into my skin.” Patton shot Logan a glare. “What?”

“How about,” Patton’s mom suggested. Virgil’s fingernails dug more into Logan’s skin. “We go to my office.”

“I think that’s a good idea, Mama,” Patton said. “Come here, Virgil.” He reached over to touch one of Virgil’s hands and had to pull a bit to get him to release Logan. “It’s back that way, away from the kitchen,” he said when he managed to twine their fingers. He stepped around Logan, probably so there was still a buffer between Virgil and the kitchen and tugged him in the correct direction.

 Ms. Heart shot a glance at Logan and Logan felt irrationally like she was trying to read his thoughts. Logan smoothed his features out and turned to follow Patton and Virgil towards her office.

As head chef, Ms. Heart had a small office where she could plan menus without the hustle and bustle of the kitchen and have meeting with people who needed to discuss dietary needs and restrictions. It was very well organized, but still looked fairly messy because of the numbers of decorations she had in it. She had a tendency to keep everything that Patton made her, thus she had his childhood drawings on the wall and little projects stacked on her desk and on the shelves. A lumpy cat statue acted as a paperweight on a stack of papers on her desk and there was a vase of fake flowers (as it could not actually hold water) sat near the window.

 By the time Logan entered the room, Patton was trying to coax Virgil into sitting down on one of the two mismatched chairs, but Virgil was having none of it. He had turned to face the door and was yanking at his sweater in nervousness.

Logan noticed that Ms. Heart did not come far into the room, instead pausing near the door. She did, however close the door to give them privacy, and that seemed to distress Virgil more.

She seemed to contemplate him for a moment. “Hello,” she said, her voice softer than Logan was used to hearing. “You must be Virgil.”

 It seemed as though he were willing himself to magically shrink, but he still replied. “Yes, ma’am,” he said quietly.

“It’s nice to meet you,” she said. “I’m Patton’s mom.”

“I know, ma’am.”

“There’s no need to be formal, Virgil.”

He hesitated. “Okay,” he said somehow quieter.

Her eyebrows drew together in concern, and it seemed that she decided to result to her default way of making people more comfortable. “Would you kids like some candy?”

Logan saw Patton’s hand squeeze Virgil’s lightly. “That would be great, Mama.”

She nodded and walked forward towards her desk. Virgil turned so his back was never to her. If she noticed, she didn’t react. She just grabbed a small tin off one of her shelves and took the top off. “How about a peppermint candy?” she asked.

 She offered the tin out to them. Virgil stared at it like it was a venomous snake. Logan decided to act, stepping forward and taking three of the pieces of peppermint candy from the dish. He stepped over to Virgil and Patton and held out his hand, offering Virgil first choice out of all three.

He hesitated before glancing between Patton and his mother. He must have decided that Patton’s mom wouldn’t risk poisoning Patton and took one of the pieces. Patton took another one of them and popped it into his mouth. Logan ate the last piece.

“Thanks,” Virgil said to Ms. Heart before placing his piece in his mouth.

[taetaespeaches]

Hi enjoy my list of moments that made me cry during the first performance of ON:E:

Jimin’s Black Swan solo dance - idk it was just really beautiful and made me emotional.

00:00 (Zero O’Clock) - this song just, ugh, do I really need to explain it? I think not.

Inner Child - I mean come on when army started singing :((

When bts joined Hobi on stage at the end of ego - it was just so happy and fun idk I was very emotional at this point.

Butterfly - wasn’t expecting it, took me by surprise and I was just sitting there pouting and crying.

Ok ending ments lol. Now we’re getting into the real tears! The previous cries were like some tears, I was being emotionally affected, I’m soft. The ending ments fucking wrecked me.

Jimin - Jimin cries, I cry. That’s just how it goes. But idk, he was so clearly frustrated with the unfortunate circumstances we’ve all had to deal with the past nearly eight months and that’s such a relatable feeling. No, most of us weren’t meant to go on a world tour, but we all had to cancel plans and pause our lives and settle into this new normal that isnt fucking normal and it’s been really hard and seeing and hearing Jimin talk about his experience with this, along with hearing and seeing his frustration with not performing how he thought he should have after all these months of build up, it’s just so relatable and it’s so easy to understand where his emotions are coming from. It hit me really hard. Plus, JIMIN IS FULL ON CRYING. p.s. Jimin sweetie you were amazing, don’t worry baby.

Namjoon - not to be dramatic but when he said “we are literally strong” it was like the build up of these past months of stress and worry and isolation and just emotional exhaustion snapped and this massive sob just racked through my body. Idk I think we all needed to hear what he said. We needed to hear someone acknowledge what we’re collectively going through but in a way that assures us that we can get through it. So many months into this, I think so many people expect us to be used to this current world and to no longer be affected by what’s going on, but it’s still really fucking hard to deal with this every day.

“We are literallly strong, the ARMYs I know and the BTS I know, we’re all strong. We’ll find a way. We always have. If there’s no way, let’s draw the map, the whole map again. So, no worries. We are strong and we are still connected, even the waves come, catastrophe comes, wind falls, snow fall, anything, lets not doubt about ourselves, lets believe in ourselves.”

To hear someone who I look up to and love so much say that, idk man, it just hit me so hard. I needed to hear that. Especially now. It felt like I was being acknowledged and understood and it felt like I could breathe for the first time in a while.

Jin - um I’m just soft for him and to hear him say that the concert felt more like a promotion than a concert made me so sad. I know we don’t talk about this stuff so I’m going to say this as vaguely as I can... I just don’t know when this pandemic will allow Jin to perform a proper show before he has to take care of national responsibilities.

Tae - Tae has previously spoken about how he has struggled with not being able to tour and physically see and feel the love of his fans and idk hearing him talk about the pandemic just really got to me. Also hearing how they put a lot of thought into dynamite performances to try to encourage us like got it just feels so comforting knowing that amongst all this craziness is we do have these guys who are wanting the best for us. I know that probably sounds delusional but I think there is a lot of mutual love and care between bts and the fans.

We Are Bulletproof: The Eternal - like, we all know why this made me cry. This song is so special. That’s all.

I’m just full of love guys. I just love bts so much. This whole thing is worded terribly but I just wanted to share it lol idk why. Anyways, I’m ready for the second performance bitches <3

[cadence-talle]

Ink Blossoming Across Your Skin

Pairing: Keefe Sencen/Fitz Vacker

Wordcount: 2,295

Summary: “Have we even met the owner? How do we know they don’t, like, beat people up?”

“I think you’re reaching,” Biana says. “Besides, I’ve seen the owners.”

Fitz blinks, reaching up to move one of the soil bags over on the shelf. “You have? When?”

“They’re right behind you.”

Other notes: Based on the amazing au created by @queersofthelostcities​ and @enbies-and-felonies​! It’s not completely like the prompt, but I hope it lives up to your original vision. 

Fitz first notices the shop on a Monday morning, bright colors of the We Are Now OPEN! sign in the window catching his eye as he crosses the street. He frowns, unlocking the door of his flower shop and setting his bag down. 

“Do you know what that is?” He asks Biana, who’s come in a few minutes after him. She shrugs, leaning out the doorway to glance at the store. 

“Looks like a tattoo parlour,” she says. Fitz wrinkles his nose. 

“Ugh. That’ll drive away business.”

Biana hums noncommittally and moves into the back to grab ice cubes for the orchids as their first customer of the day comes in. Fitz forces himself to focus and not think about the tattoo shop. 

It doesn’t work very well. 

“Look, I’m just saying, a lot of our customers are old ladies or moms with kids. Having a tattoo shop next door, with an entirely different vibe and clientele, is going to mess with us.” Fitz angrily stabs the salad he brought for lunch. 

His sister raises an eyebrow, taking a bite of her sandwich. “Are you really talking about the ‘vibe’ of our flower shop?”

“Ugh. I just- who wants to get a tattoo anyway?”

Biana looks pointedly at him and then to her arm, which is covered in twisting vines and flowers. Fitz sighs. 

“Point taken.”

He leans back against the front desk a few hours later, mentally counting the bags of soil they have stacked on the shelves behind the counter. 

“Have we even met the owner? How do we know they don’t, like, beat people up?”

“I think you’re reaching,” Biana says. “Besides, I’ve seen the owners.”

Fitz blinks, reaching up to move one of the soil bags over on the shelf. “You have? When?”

“They’re right behind you.”

Fitz spins around, almost falling over, just in time to see two people enter the shop. One, a short, smiling woman with silver-tipped hair, immediately moves into the shelves of potted plants. Biana taps Fitz on the shoulder. 

“I’m gonna go, uh, see if she needs anything.”

Fitz snorts but nods, and Biana disappears. The other owner, a man only a few inches taller than Fitz, leans against the countertop. Fitz gives him a once-over. Blond hair, blue eyes, smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth- he’s hot. 

Only if you pay attention to that sort of thing, of course, and Fitz most certainly does not. There is a perfectly reasonable explanation as to why he currently can’t talk that has nothing to do with the man in front of him. 

“I’m Keefe,” he says. “You own this store, right?”

Fitz nods hurriedly. “Uh. Yeah. It was my mom’s- that’s where the name came from, her name’s Della- but now she’s retired, so now it’s mine and my sister’s, and- I’m rambling. Sorry.”

Keefe laughs. “It’s fine. I think it’s sweet.”

Face burning, Fitz glances down at the register. “So, what are you here to buy?”

“Nothing,” Keefe shrugs one shoulder. “Linh wanted to see if you guys had lilies, so we closed the shop and came over here.”

“You-” Fitz blinks at him- “You just… closed your store? Randomly?”

“I mean, what’s the point of owning a store if you can’t just close it at any moment?” 

“I…”

The shorter woman- Linh, Fitz remembers- appears behind Keefe with a pot of Canada lilies. She sets them on the counter and smiles at Biana. 

“Thanks for helping me find these,” she says. Biana flushes slightly. 

“No problem. Have a good day.”

“You too!” Linh picks up her flowers and turns toward the door. Keefe shoots Fitz a smile. 

“Nice to meet you,” he calls. “See you around.”

Fitz nods slightly before they’re gone. As soon as the door closes, tiny bell at the front chiming merrily, he lets out a long breath. Biana’s still staring at the doorway. 

“Uh.” She says. 

“Yeah,” Fitz agrees. “Yeah.”

-/-

To be quite honest, Fitz isn’t expecting to see Keefe (or Linh) the next day. He’s not sure he wants to. A nervous, bubbly feeling rises in his gut each time he thinks about it, and he needs to work. He should just focus on the flowers and not think about anything else.

Unfortunately, flowers are incredibly boring. Fitz loves them, but they’re not exactly the best distraction material; he waters the peonies, rearranges the daisies, and moves one vase of tulips over to the counter for better visibility. And then he has nothing to do. 

Not to mention that it’s Wednesday, which is always one of the lowest-traffic days in a week. Fitz has seen maybe three different customers by the time lunch rolls around, and he doesn’t even feel like moving into the back to eat. Might as well stay out here and watch people walk past the front window.

His head snaps up as someone opens the door. 

“Keefe!”

“Hey,” Keefe says, flopping down onto the stool in front of the counter. “Business slow over here too?”

“Yeah. What’d you need?”

“Well-” Keefe waves a sketchbook in the air- “I have to practice art, for stencils and all that, and I figured, flowers are fun to draw. It’ll be a change of pace, at least.” He grins at Fitz. “So, can I lurk in the corner of your shop and sketch?”

“Uh, sure?” Fitz blinks. “Just don’t interrupt customers.”

Keefe pumps his fist and moves his stool against the wall, leaning his sketchbook on his lap. Fitz does his best to ignore him and moves back up to the register to help the tiny blond woman who’s purchased a huge bouquet of marigolds. 

“Thank you,” she says as Fitz hands her back her credit card. “My girlfriend is going to love these.”

“No problem,” Fitz responds, smiling. “Have a nice day.”

He turns to look at Keefe after the woman’s gone, bent over his notebook furiously scribbling. Five minutes later, he slams the page down on the counter. 

“Eh?”

Fitz picks it up, marvelling at the accuracy; it’s the marigold buyer, the teasing light in her eyes somehow captured even in a black-and-white sketch. 

“Wow,” he says, handing the page back to Keefe. “This is amazing.”

“Psh.” Keefe waves a hand in the air. “It’s not that good.” Still, his cheeks have a definite tint to them as he snaps his sketchpad closed. “I should be getting back to the shop. My lunch break is definitely over.”

“All right,” Fitz says. He’s not sure why he feels so sad. “See you tomorrow?”

Keefe gives him a thumbs-up and ducks out of the store. 

-/-

It’s a week after the first time Keefe comes into the shop on his lunch break that Fitz finally says something about it. 

“Doesn’t Linh need you?”

Keefe looks up from his latest drawing- this one an inked recreation of the vase sitting in the front window. He’s been running his hand through his hair as he works, so it’s sticking up all over the place. Fitz chooses to ignore the warm feeling in his gut.

“Huh?”

“At the shop,” Fitz elaborates. “Don’t you two need to be doing, like tattoo stuff?”

“Nah. She’s on break right now too. Honestly, it’s just nice to get out of the store and away from her terrible attempts at flirting with Biana.”

“Wait, Biana’s over there?” Fitz blinks. “She usually goes to Starbucks for lunch. If she goes out at all.”

Keefe shrugs. “I don’t know. She’s been coming in to eat lunch with Linh for the past couple days now.” He cocks his head at Fitz. “Why? Are you trying to get rid of me or something?” 

The question is teasing, but the underlying edge shows how much Keefe cares about the answer. Fitz hurries to backtrack. 

“No! I was just- wondering.”

Shrugging again in a way that says it’s fine and also can we end this conversation, Keefe glances towards the door. “Today’s pretty low-traffic, huh?”

“Yeah,” Fitz says. “Wednesdays usually are.”

“Huh.” Keefe drums his fingers on the table, seemingly bored of sketching, before his eyes light up. “Do you know how to play Spit?”

“Do I know how to play what?”

“Spit! It’s a card game.” Out of nowhere, Keefe produces a deck of cards. Fitz looks around the empty shop and sighs. 

“Sure, why not. Let’s play.”

Fifteen minutes later, Fitz slaps his hand down onto the smaller pile of cards, yelling triumphantly as he picks it up. Keefe groans. 

“I win,” Fitz grins at him. This is the first game he’s won since they started playing, and he is probably far too excited. He slips off their stool, heading over to one of the tulip displays and picking out a wilting flower that had been bothering him. Behind him, he can hear Keefe get to his feet. 

“I should probably be getting back,” he says. Fitz nods and turns around to face him, hand holding the tulip coming out almost automatically. Keefe looks at it quizzically. “Are you… giving me a flower?”

“Uh.” Fitz says, shrugging as nonchalantly as he can. “Yes? I mean, if you don’t want it, that’s okay, I wouldn’t be offended or anything- not that there’s anything to be offended by, it’s just a flower-”

Keefe plucks the tulip out of his hand, staring at it for a minute. “It’s pretty,” he says. “Thanks.”

Then he turns and leaves the shop. 

-/-

Fitz is a little worried that the impromptu flower-giving is going to make things awkward, but when Keefe comes back the next day, there’s no sign that anything has changed. He still sets up in the corner, still jokes with Fitz between customers. They’ve settled into a peaceful rhythm; it’s simple, easy in a way things haven’t been in a long time. 

 And when, a few days later, Fitz hands Keefe another tulip on his way out, the smile he gets is genuine. 

They start to hang out outside of work, just little trips; heading up to the Bronx Zoo to see the elephants (Keefe claims he’s not invested in them, but the way he gasps as soon as he sees one says otherwise), walking along the boardwalk at Coney Island with Biana and Linh. Fitz smiles and takes photos and tries to ignore the looks Biana sends his way- they’re friends, this is what friends do. It doesn’t mean anything. 

It means so little that, when Keefe suggests they get matching ‘bros’ tattoos, Fitz agrees. 

He’s pretty sure he’s drunk. No, scratch that; he’s definitely sure he’s drunk. It’s been a long week, and he’s drunk, and this is not a good idea.

But Keefe- drunker than him, that’s for sure- is holding tight to his hand, pulling him along the street. He turns back, grinning brightly under the soft light of a streetlamp, and Fitz feels warm all over. 

So. They get the tattoos, and now Fitz has proof of his totally-platonic feelings inked along his collarbone. 

This is fine. 

-/-

“What do you think, lilies or asters?” Biana slides the tattoo book over to him, and Fitz examines the carefully-drawn designs. 

“Asters,” he answers, thumbing through the pages. “Assuming you’re getting them in color. Purple looks nice on you.”

Biana nods, tracing patterns on her as-of-yet uninked arms. Fitz frowns. “You sure you want to get flowers on your other arm too?”

“Yes,” his sister says confidently. “I didn’t go for both arms the first time because I wasn’t sure how good they’d turn out, but Linh’s doing these, so I know they’ll be beautiful.”

Fitz raises an eyebrow. “Linh’s doing these, huh? So you two will be alone in a room together for hours?”

Biana glares at him and Fitz offers her an innocent smile. “Look, you should just get together already. Ask her out or something.”

Offering him her most you’re being an idiot look, Biana snorts. “Like you’re one to talk. How many not-dates have you been on with Keefe?”

“That-” Fitz sputters. “That’s completely different!”

“Is it? How?” Biana picks her bag up off the counter- it’s almost closing time. Fitz scowls, clenching his hands into fists. 

“Because you have a chance!”

The store is silent for a moment before Biana sighs softly, giving him a quick hug. “Oh, hon.” She looks him straight in the eye, smiling a little. “You’ll figure it out.”

Then she shoulders her bag- “Gotta run!”- and leaves Fitz standing in the middle of the shop, completely and utterly confused. 

-/-

He’s still confused the next day, trying to focus on customers and work. He completes his to-do list for the next week just in one morning, and is getting a head start on designing flower arrangements for a wedding- a wedding six months away- when Keefe walks in. 

“Hey, dude,” he says mildly, dropping down beside Fitz. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Fitz responds, harsher than he means to. Keefe blinks. 

“Is everything okay?”

“Yes,” Fitz says, and then, “No.” To hell with it, he thinks, turning to face Keefe head-on. “I’m annoyed at myself because I can’t control my feelings.”

Keefe tilts his head, a glimmer of something that might be hope in his eyes. “Control what feelings?”

“All of them,” Fitz laughs hollowly, “but especially the ones for you.”

He looks down at his lap, afraid to look at the other man. “We keep doing all this ‘friend stuff’ that feels like it should be a date, but it’s not, and I’m just- I just. I’m sorry, I’m rambling again-”

“Don’t worry about it.” Fitz chances a glance upward to see Keefe grinning at him. “I think it’s sweet.”

-/-

They can’t, unfortunately, remove the misbegotten ‘bros’ tattoos. Instead, Linh carefully inks two images next to each one; a heart, and a flower. 

[ceo-of-choco-bibi]

HCLW 107 SPOILERS

I've actually been so upset over the past few days because of the new chapters... nothing to worry about though it's not too serious.

I am making content, in terms of fics I got one more oneshot to add to my current chocotemp collection, a HnK au, and a new series of oneshots, more precisely about how I feel GRG would respond to the current event in the real world. In terms of art I have a few sketch graphs and one piece planned, but it might take a while to churn out.

(Check out my ao3 for my fics! https://archiveofourown.org/series/1811194)

For now I just really want to talk about them because they make me so sad and happy at the same time. Enjoy my rambling.

Giga 13th squad! They're all so cool, Giga's squad are really just Squad 1 Legendary characters team, the other fillers and Squad 13th. I immediately fall for any teleportation-related character, so Veganic is like (chef's kiss)! He is adorable I want to pick him up and put him in my fancy coat pocket.

MASTER SWORDSMAN ALWAYS GETS THE COOLEST PANELS! AS HE SHOULD! HE SLAYS ALL THE TIME UGH I

I hate the word goated but he really is he's the coolest and I hope he knows it! I feel embarrassed for talking to a fictional character but I wish he knows how much I love and cherish him

"There are times in life when you lose. If you're bound to lose, then just do the best you can! Then there will be a next time." I'm so devastated. How could you leave like this. How could you leave so happy when I'm dying over here.

"Give it to Choco Bibi and tell him it's my gift to congratulate him for becoming the second guild master of Grass Roots."

"How about we fight with our swords? It's been a while!"

"There should be a home for him to return to after he's done wandering. I'm going to start a new guild."

You don't understand. I don't have words for how painful this is. Just revel in the pain with me.

And here comes the backstory fluff (aka a sweetener to make the angst more bitter)

"How about we dance to draw attention?" "I think that'll make things worse." HELP ME

I CAN'T BELIEVE BIBI CANONICALLY HAS PRETTY BOY PRIVILEGE!!!! AS HE SHOULD???????

I'm actually never going to shut up about how Bibi never blushes in the presence of women. Like never. MSM and Drip Soup are always blushing when there's pretty women around but really Bibi has never shown attraction. When Pooh Upooh was naked? No. When Coco first entered the guild? No. Here, where a girl literally says she wants to go on a date with him? NO. This is actually my queer agenda, me and Sehun Kim had a talk and we agreed on making Bibi queer coded.

I would have never guessed that Drip Soup and Tempest were both affiliated with Giga for a short while? Guess I manifested my Giga!GRG but in a different way

I've never let go of the headcanon that Bibi is fucking terrible with feelings and is always angry, this just solidifies it more (really, every interaction Bibi has is just solidifying the theory that he's emotionally constipated)

I've also got the feeling that Bibi's super prideful in the sense that he would rather not express weakness (cry, express pain) in front of others (seen when he gets beaten by NM!Bibi the first time on) and that he channels everything into spite and anger instead. I kind of want to see this when he realises MSM is gone later on also. I want to see him get irrationally mad and blame someone (HCLW) before realising (or realising but still feeling lost and like he has to target someone) MSM wouldn't have wanted this. Armes wouldn't have wanted this. His friends are the only ones left.

It really comforts me to see that Master Swordsman is happy with his life right now. I'm kind of stuck between "oh he's happy because he's well off from the game, his work doesn't count" and "anything that you're happy with in life is worth it. You don't need an office job to be happy" though, but for real. I've never wanted a regular office job and I'd rather just do something simple and get by since nothing matters in the long run when I die. But at the same time, I feel like I can only say this because of how privileged I am to be me. It's hard being alive, sometimes. I'll pull through.

Tempest appearance! This time it solidifies my idea that Tempest finds his friends to be more important than himself, at least at this point of time. I expand a lot more in my new fic and I've written a bunch there already, so I'll save it for then (haha, shameless plug)

It's so bloody funny that they're all from the same school and that they're meeting up for a battle. What are you, YouTubers with beef?

TEMPEST BEING A GOODY TWO SHOES NERD? HIS HAIR IS KIND OF FLUFFY? (I die.) TEMPEST AND BIBI IRL INTERACTION? THEY KNOW EACH OTHER IRL BEFOREHAND? (I die again.) BIBI EATING POPCORN? (I die once more.)

Anyways Bibi with a sugar addiction I really do not need to elaborate on this.

They are such LOSERS who does irl fights I swear to god yall EMBARRASSING /lh

I MANIFESTED HEAVY ALCOHOL TOLERANCE BIBI YOU HAVE ME TO THANK FOR THIS!!!!!!! I REALLY DID!!!!!!!! (My linked headcanon was that Bibi's the group protector when they're out drinking. It's sort of true.)

I can't do this. This is a lot for my heart. To whoever looks at this, why? But also thank you for being here it means a lot to me.

MSM RICH

Bibi gets couch rights as he should! Also Bibi and Tempest airpod users while MSM and Soup earphone users?

Glasses and WFL came from nowhere but alright I still love them

The gifts thing. The gifts thing. I am so upset it's unbelievable.

The hat... the hat was given to Bibi by MSM... I want to see him have a breakdown now. I want to see him wear the hat forever on after this arc because it's something solid he has left. He's an art major irl, I want to see him recreate the hat or make art related to MSM.

"You might be grumpy on the outside, but I know you always think dear of me. I'm glad you don't know what I'm doing right now. If you did, you would've stopped me by any means."

It hurts so much.

"Life doesn't always go your way. And sometimes... you just want to run away from the life that turned out so differently. Some people say, the place you run off to is no paradise. They may be right, but those who ran away can still comfort each other there."

GRG IS LITERALLY FOUND FAMILY! THEY ARE LITERALLY-

I cannot do this anymore it's horrible my heart is shattering into a million pieces

"How did we end up like this? You went through enough to deserve a little happiness. Hardcore. Go back to your friends!"

He does deserve it. You deserve it. I hate this. Thank you. Sorry.

And Bibi still doesn't know. He'll be the last to know. "Did he go knowing I loved him? What were his last words? How do I go on? What do I do from now?"

I do want to see them reunite and remember. I do want to see them waddle in their hurt and pain, to heal together, to move on as a guild knowing this is what MSM would have wanted. It's so fascinating seeing someone grow and oh how much have the Grass Roots grown in the past 3 years. They've been close to my heart since forever and I really love them so much.

Final conclusion: I hope you've hurt as much as I do. I hope reading this has shown you something from my perspective that has made you hurt a little more. Talk to me and be my friend so we can hurt together.

On a more self note: Like I said, I'm writing stuff. I'm drawing stuff. It sucks to think sometimes that so few people will see it, but I know that I love what I'm doing. I may be prideful and want more people to love me, but I think I'm not selfish for wanting so. Reading this drains me. Reading this fills me with inspiration and joy and happiness and pain and anger and sadness.

I hope you don't find it just plain cringe that my emotions work like this. I hope that you reading this find comfort in knowing someone feels this way too. Thank you.

[transbibennyweir]

I love mbav so much it’s one of my favorite shows ever and I’m still so upset over the cliffhanger ending but on a side note Benny weir was definitely my number one favorite character but that might be due to the fact that I have a crush on him and in real life too anyway though I will say bethan is definitely my otp favorite pairing from the show as well and I was so upset they didn’t end together in the end but I was wondering if you would consider making Bethan fanfiction for this month?

duuude i feel the same way i love the show and even me who isn’t really into shipping can’t argue that those two had some real chemistry going on. that cliffhanger ending will always suck but at least we got fanfic to cope and pretend it didnt happen lol but yeah i’ve been writing two or three (really) short fics. the requests are mostly bethan so lucky you! i just put a new i did under the cut. its short and smiple and not too over the top shippy. its still good i think but the next bethan fic i want write to be super over the top shippy for fun with fluff (and angst with comfort ofc) (also this is on ao3)

The Valentine Dance at school was only a week away and Benny had the less than amazing plan to confess some long time dwelling feelings, and if he was lucky score a date to the dance. Although, he was lacking in any confidence seeing as he was never the best with plans and had the worst luck with... Well with everything if he was honest. Ethan was more the plan guy. Which was a total problem when Ethan is who the confession was for. Benny debated for half the school day if he should ask anyone for help, it became pretty obvious that they wouldn’t be that helpful. Rory can’t keep a secret to save his undead life, Erica isn’t much of the romantic type (ignoring that she wouldn’t want help at all in the first place), and Sarah... Actually Sarah might be the only one that would be any real help. That’s if she wanted to help. After what happened Freshman year with Ethan pinning for her and the eventual coming out from Sarah that she didn’t like guys it was sometimes amazing they could still be friends without one of them dying of awkwardness. If anything it was more awkward to ask for help from your current crush’s ex-crush, but Benny was out of options.

“Hey Sarah!” Benny greeted on his phone, his leg bouncing as he sat nervously on his bed. He had decided that he would try talk to her after school, partly hoping he would talk himself out of doing any of this. “I kinda need your help for something important. How quick do you think you could be at my place tonight? Sarah? Sarah!”

When there wasn’t a reply Benny repeated her name wondering what happened followed with a moment of silence and a sudden swiping sound of gusting wind through his phone then a whoosh out in front of his bedroom window. Vampire speed, always handy. “This quick enough for you?” Sarah giggled. Between last year to now Sarah was a lot more playful about her vampire-ness, much to the amusement of Benny.

“Knew I could count on you, Sar!” He grinned at her.

“As always. So, what’s this super important thing you needed my help in the middle of a school night?” She asked, jumping onto his bed with a weightless thump. “Is it a magic problem or just your special brand of weirdness for tonight?”

“Ha! Very funny. I mean it. It’s serious. There’s the dance coming up and I need your help scoring with-” Benny was cut off by Sarah abruptly standing up with a squeaked out “What!”

“Benny! I thought you said this was serious. I rushed over here for you thinking ugh-I can’t believe you! I am not helping you with ‘score’ with some random-”

“It’s Ethan.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah....”

“Benny, I am really sorry.”

There was an awkward silence that made Benny want rip his insides out which was a total confidence booster. “Nah, no, it’s fine. I shouldn’t have been so ‘Benny’ about it. My fault.” Benny’s voice sounded worn and hoarse. Sarah wrapped her arms around Benny to comfort him, sitting back on his bed they stayed quite, Benny taking steading breathes. “I know it’s been a summer since he got over you, but I dunno we’ve always been friends and really close. Confident Benny wants say there’s a chance he’s into me, but Nervous Benny says everything I think has been a sign is just me getting way too hopeful and I’m just,” Benny sighed leaning into Sarah’s hug. “Really tired dancing around how I feel all the time.”

“Awe, Benny,” Sarah settled into her place on the bed facing her favorite spell-caster. “Okay. I’ll help you. What’s the plan?” Benny sheepishly smiled and raised his shoulders.

“I was kinda hoping you could come up with something. I’m more of a plan follower than a plan maker. My ideas tend to lead to the actual problem that needs fixing.” He laughed nervously.

“I think I can come up with something. You still know that flower spell, right?” They grinned at each other.

“Of course.”

+++

The school dance was now only four days away and Sarah’s plan was simple and more importantly fool-proof. Which is what Benny was counting on.

“So, all you need to do is talk to him. Take him to the park. Whoa him with some magic, some flowers and then boom! Ask him to the dance. Simple and sups romantic.” Sarah said as they walked outside to see Ethan and their friends waiting for them in the school parking lot. “Think you can manage?”

Benny waved at them nervously. “I’m totally going mess this up.”

“Ben, it’s literally the most straightforward plan on the planet. There’s no way for you to mess it up. Just be your usual funny and charming self, it’s what he loves most about you.” Sarah smiled reassuring. Reaching their friends Benny tried not act anymore strange than his typical self, which was hard when Benny’s go to was being strange. It came with the magic powers and general teenage boy awkwardness. Erica was pushing Rory back onto the ground as he tried to float above her head saying there was something in her hair, there wasn’t, really he just wanted steal her hair pin that he was obsessed with.

“Come on, Erica!” Rory teased picking at the clip.

“Rory, if you don’t stop I’m going drive a stake through your un-dead heart!” She threatened as Ethan laughed before turning his attention to Benny and Sarah.

“Hey, Sarah, Ben.” He smiled sweetly, his eyes glancing at Benny with a sheepish blush. Although the boy in question was too busy freaking out internally to notice. “We still on for movie night?”

“Oh right!” Sarah said suddenly with a false quickness. “I totally forgot that’s tonight. Me and the vamps have some Vampire Council business and such. Y’know, vampires only. Heh.” She lied poorly but Ethan was just a little too slow to catch on.

“We do?” The two other vampires said holding off on their mini fight over a hair clip, Erica holding onto both Rory’s wrists in opposing directions. Erica watched the panic in Sarah and Benny’s eyes that said all she needed to know; ‘please just pay along’ written all over their faces. “Oooh. Yes-yeah. We do. Totally. No humans allowed or they will eat your face off. We’re doing a... vampire... ritual.... Yeah.”

“We do that? Awesome!” Rory said suddenly excited if not a little confused. “Why didn’t they tell me anything? Do you guys have their number or something because if so I feel it’s unfair that I don’t-”

“Rory, not right now.” Erica pulled her hair clip out of Rory’s hand, annoyed. “We should get going. Don’t want be late for the... ritual. Right, Sarah?”

“Right! Yeah, we really need get going. Super speed can only be so quick. Let’s go.” Sarah chuckled, pushing two of her friends away from Ethan and Benny. “We’ll see you later!” The three vamps speeded off, the other two waving them bye. The school parking lot was empty by then, Ethan’s full attention placed fully on Benny who felt the crushing weight of his friend’s eyes on him as he always did when they were alone. It was easy to play off any pining feelings when they hung out, their friendship had always been enough for Benny. Even when he had see Ethan longing after a different person, it was hard sometimes, but Benny could always push down any budding jealously or unsettling sadness. Ethan would always be his friend and now if he was lucky he could put boy in front of friend. The thought making his cheeks warm and his heart fast.

“Soo, movie night?” Ethan asked, they started their walk home only instead Benny had planned to take a subtle left turn towards the park the spell for appearing flowers repeating in his head.

“Actually I was thinking we could, uh, go for a walk... to the park?” Benny flinched with the odd expectation that his friend would suddenly reject him right there and then. “I have something I want show you, I dunno. Is that dumb? I feel dumb.”

“Benny. It’s cool. Come on, I kinda wanted tell you something anyways.” Ethan replied with a smile, his hand close to gracing against the taller boy’s. The near touch drawing them closer to each other, they’ve always gravitated towards one another with a strange pull that was always between them. Benny wondered if Ethan ever felt it, if he could ever see how Benny looked at him with such love and care. Maybe his seer powers let him see it more clearly than Benny felt it, lucky him Ethan still didn’t fully know how mind read yet.

The start of their walk was mostly silent, the longer the quite went for the more Benny’s internal freak out grew into full blown panic. He was seriously reconsidering saying anything at this point. Half way to the park and they hadn’t said a single word to each other, a first for their friendship. Ethan was biting his lower lip clearly lost in deep thought, Benny was too nervous to speak and break into whatever was going through the shorter boy’s head.

“Ben... Benny, heh, uh, I’ve been wanting to say this for awhile and I didn’t know how and I know you’re you know... You.” Ethan started. None of his words were comforting to Benny right now. “Wait-wait. That came out weird. I just wanted say when we came out to each other last summer. I know I acted really weird afterwards and it was totally uncool of me and I know I should’ve said sorry forever ago, but I’m real sorry, Ben. It was lame of me and I only acted like that because there some feelings I didn’t think I was ready to think about and now it’s like my brain is stuck thinking them but I don’t want things weird so, uh, am I making any sense?”

Benny didn’t know if he should laugh or cry, he went with the former and abruptly began to giggle in a almost soft of manic way. The sudden out bust of laugher worried Ethan. “Why are you laughing? Benny, I’m being serious. Come on, dude.”

“Sorry, dude. It’s just, you really scared me there for a second, E. I know it was a weird shift it’s totally fine. I was never mad.” Benny said, his laughter subsiding. Although he took note of the last bit, he didn’t want feel like he was reading too much into it but it couldn’t nothing, right?

They reached the park a few yards off where there was a bench was waiting for them. The lump in Benny’s throat was starting appear and it was getting too late for him to choke and bail on this whole thing. “Let’s go sit on the bench. It’s my turn to ramble and make barely any sense.”

“So nothing new.” Ethan teased. Ben wrapped his arm around Ethan’s neck and ruffled his hair.

“Yeah, yeah. Just sit down, okay?” Benny sat down with a nervous smile and his leg bouncing with a quick uneasy pace. “On the topic of us not being the straightest lightsabers in the bunch. Heh. There’s the dance coming up and I didn’t want go alone and there’s this person I wanted ask-”

“Really?” Ethan butted in with a sad look making something clink in Benny’s head. “That’s... great. What’s he like?”

“Oh you know, he’s really cool and mega smart and like, the biggest dork in the whole world.” Benny was grinning now, biting his lower lip to fight back his nervous joy. Maybe it was petty but if he was understanding right then making Ethan jealous for two minutes would make up for last year’s Sarah obsession.

“Oh. Uh. He sounds really cool. I’m glad you like him so much. So, what’s the plan to ask him out?” Ethan asked, his mood becoming more downcast suddenly. E, you pretty idiot. Well, just a bit of teasing fun wouldn’t hurt.

“Mhm. Yeah, he’s really great. I was thinking of asking him after school, y’know, surprise him with some flowers use a little magic to make sure their his favorite. Like this,” Benny made a quick glance to make sure no one was looking before making a bouquet of flowers appear. It had been the first simple trick that Benny had ever show Ethan. It started as a cheesy way to impress girls now it was becoming a cheesy way to impress his Ethan. The flowers matched the color scheme of Ethan’s favorite Star Wars character, right down to matching the center one with the character’s lightsaber.

Ethan stared at the flowers with a shy sadness. “Oh? Then what? Explain to him vampires are real next? I’m sure that one will go over real great, Bens.”

“Maybe. I think he’d be freaked out at first, probably less than he should be but grow to think it was way kick ass. I think he’d do pretty awesome fighting some bloodsuckers. Bet he looks really hot staking one out. The same way I think he looks really hot when he plays video games and starts losing and sits on my lap-which is totally cheating by the way, but I let it slide because again total cutie. I want ask him to the dance, maybe after we could sneak out and-”

“Jeez, Benny. Stop it, okay. I get it.” Ethan stood up from his seat, covering his ears. “You must really like him. What’s his name?”

“Oh, I dunno it’s something like Ian? Eric? Wait! No, I remember it’s Ethan Morgan the dumbest yet prettiest boy in town. Only second to yours truly.” Benny grinned gaining more of a cool confidence as he saw the way Ethan’s blush grew dark across his face.

“Oh.”

“Yeah ‘oh’ you dope! Who else could I have ever been talking about?! Han Solo?”

“First of all, I don’t know! And second, Han was totally gay for Luke but that’s for a different time.” Ethan said, glancing as an older couple walked past them.

“Wait, were you jealous? Like actually?”

“What! No way, I was not.” Ethan’s blush creeped up to his ears. “And anyways, it was totally not cool of you-”

“Then we’re even. Fair?” Benny leaned closer to Ethan, the flowers disappearing from between them. “Were the flowers too gay?”

Ethan leaned closer and bit his lip. “Bens, I don’t know how break this to you, but you’re like the gayest person in town.”

“Second to you.” He laughed before Ethan closed the gap between their lips catching him off guard. The small doubt that lingered in the back of his mind was put at ease as their lips fit together. “Sorry. I was really hoping I didn’t mess this up.” Benny tried not to giggle.

“Lucky you, your bad gay jokes and charm is what got me hooked on you in the first place.”

“Yeah, guess I am a catch. So... We’re on for the dance?”

“Yeah.” Ethan smiled holding Benny’s hands. “Yeah, Bens. We are.” They grinned at each other, hands clasped together and knees touching.

[erekiosuncreativeideas]

Being Human - Chapter 12

<= Chapter 11

Summary : Snatcher has a talk with someone. Also available on AO3 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/24826561/chapters/65084764

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

NEW CHAPTER HEEEEY I hope you'll like it ! I managed to work quite well on "Being Human" recently and I finished writing the 14th chapter yesterday (and it's a long one too) ! I had a blast writing the 12th and 14th chapter and I can't wait for you to read it !

Thank you so much for all your support, it means so, so, so much to me. I know I keep repeating this, but this is the truth. Without you, I wouldn't be where I am today.

Fun fact: I will soon draw my 100th drawing on "A Hat In Time" (I'm colouring the 98th one and I sketched the 99th one, I genuinely wonder what the 100th will represent!). I have been extremely productive this year, I think I drew like 150 pictures (in general) from the beginning of 2020 to today. And it's all thanks to you guys !! Thank you so much !

ANYWAY.

The “Oh The Humanity” AU belongs to @doodledrawsthings​ !

Happy reading !

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Chapter 12 - “You’re bad at telling scary stories.”

-“Here, come this way,” instructed Cooking Cat, as she led him to the machine room, her face serious now that the kids were nowhere in sight.

Snatcher’s expression showed how confused he was, seeing where she was taking him. Why there? He didn’t have his place in this room, and certainly neither did she, unless he greatly underestimated her. If she saw his face, she didn’t say anything, leading him further into the ship instead, stopping in front of a green door with the pictogram of a brush on the centre of it. Where would it lead? A playroom perhaps? A room dedicated to hobbies? After all, with such a huge ship, it wouldn’t be far-fetched to find a room like that inside.

The door opened swiftly revealing -another!- hallway, just as sloped as the others. Oh, this was just great, especially with how he fell earlier. His legs hurt. Well, everything did, but mostly his legs. However, the cat seemed to notice the scowl on his face and offered her paw for him to remain stable.

-“Need some help?” she offered, concern plastered all over her face. Ugh, Gods, did Snatcher hate that expression. It just made him feel even more pathetic than he already was.

-“No,” he spat, keeping his eyes fixed on the slope not to stumble, “I can walk on my own. I’m not a stupid baby, thank you,” he added, his stone still very harsh. Deep inside, he knew the other was just trying to help, but he couldn’t keep the words inside. He was too mad at himself, at the whole situation to care. But, surprisingly, Cooking Cat only smiled at him and pulled her hand back.

-“Okay,” she simply replied and the former ghost cringed at her compassionate tone. Still… This was a very different reaction than what he had expected. The hatted brat would have yelled at him, the other one would have given him a sad look… But Cooking Cat just agreed, not looking different than usual, despite his harsh words.

Somehow… Somehow, it felt like he wasn’t rushed to accept his current “condition” for once. It was a nice change. He knew the little girls had been trying to help him, but this was different, in a way he couldn’t describe precisely.

Great, and now he was feeling bad. Just another negative feeling on the top of all the terrible ones he was already feeling, perfect, fantastic. The former ghost avoided looking at Cooking Cat, guilt eating him inside. This was so ridiculous: he was (used to be…?) a soul-stealing spirit, one that forced people to work for him only to kill them afterwards… And now he was feeling guilty? What the heck?

“This is just this stupid human brain,” he thought grumpily as they walked into the hallway, the cat adapting her pace to match his, not forcing him to go faster than he could. He hated to be pitied that much, it just reminded him that he was less capable than any human… Yet, a part of himself felt grateful for it, no matter how much he was trying to repress it.

Snatcher wasn’t weak, he didn’t want to be. How could he, with an entire village to protect against a crazy Queen? It was his responsibility.

They eventually reached the other door, which opened just as quickly as the first one. The sight that greeted Snatcher’s eyes was definitely not one he had expected. His jaw dropped from the surprise, his eyes glancing everywhere, examining his surroundings with much interest.

It was a gallery. The walls were green, with burgundy columns in the corners of the room. The floor was covered in red carpet, with round, darker patterns on it. A long light green rug was in front of them, starting from the door to the opposite wall. On their left was a pedestal on which was exhibited a bust with a golden, shiny necklace. Just as expected, the room was full of paintings, all very different from one another. Most of them represented the hatted girl, others showed people he didn’t know, or ones he vaguely remembered such as the mafia goons who often wandered in his forest. He entered the room, more than impressed with what he was seeing… Until he found a particular painting that caught his attention.

-“Hey, that’s me!” he exclaimed, surprised. He moved just in front of the painting, admiring it in bewilderment: his previous ghostly appearance could be seen in the middle of the picture, as if he were screaming, though his expression wasn’t a horrified one. The setting seemed awfully familiar to him, as if he had seen another version of that painting somewhere else. Huh. Weird.

Confusion replaced his initial surprise as questions echoed in his mind. However, his lips moved on their own, voicing them as he kept his eyes stuck on the painting before him:

-“Who made that?” he asked, unable to look anywhere else.

Cooking Cat stayed silent for a brief moment, as if to think, before replying, unsure:

-“I don’t know,” she answered trustfully: “I’ve only been here once, to be completely honest. I tried asking about it, but the girls avoided the question. They’re usually pretty talkative, but there are some things they try not to talk about. So… I don’t force them.”

The former ghost remembered what the kids told him earlier, about the war that broke out between their people… If this was something like that, it made sense they didn’t want to talk about it. He couldn’t really blame them, considering he didn’t like to mention his own past. However… This was different: his face was literally on the picture, he was directly concerned by this! He never gave anyone the right to use his image! Really, the nerve of some people, he should sue!

But, as he finally managed to inspect the other paintings as well… He realized that he wasn’t the only one concerned, seeing as some pictures featured other people, like that awfully annoying tourist that always managed to avoid his traps…

For real, who painted those? Certainly not the kids: he had seen their drawings and they certainly didn’t look like that. These paintings were obviously made by professionals, people who knew how to draw and how to colour. What a strange mystery…

Snatcher was brought back to reality as Cooking Cat called out to him softly. He turned in her direction, noticing only now that she was sitting on the floor, patting the spot next to her, as an invitation for him to join her.

-“You’re kidding, right?” he asked, with a mix of confusion and mockery in his voice.

-“Trust me,” she answered, patting the spot harder, clearly insisting. The man looked at her for a few seconds, wondering how naive she could be to think he’d sit on the floor just because he was asked to… But no matter how motionless he remained, she just kept her eyes on his, waiting patiently for him to sit, not pushing him nor rushing him to do so.

Just waiting.

It wasn’t long until her stare made him ill at ease, made him feel like he was ridiculous, just like a child throwing a tantrum at his patient mother. But as soon as that thought came to his mind, he realized this wasn’t really far from the truth, given how motherly Cooking Cat had acted up until now… And he had just admitted he was behaving like a kid.

Now that was just great.

With a loud and frustrated sigh, Snatcher eventually gave in and sat next to her, a clear frown visible on his face. His arms were around his legs, keeping his knees close to his chest. He stared at her with irritation:

-“Fine, I’m sitting next to you. Amazing. What now?” his voice sounded bored and exasperated, but he was actually intrigued, if he had to be completely honest. Why would she take him to this room, only to have him sit on the carpet? As if this was going to help him fight his so-called emotions! Ugh.

Being human sucked.

However, before he was able to say anything else, he felt a powerful tug on the collar of his jacket, pulling him down to the floor. His back soon hit the ground, though not as hard as he thought it would. His head thankfully was stopped by the cat’s paw before any possible impact. Snatcher’s eyes were wide open from the surprise and the shock, looking everywhere as the gears in his mind started to turn. And then it clicked.

Cooking Cat had pulled on his collar, forcing him to lie down, his back against the soft carpet.

-“Hey!” he protested, trying to straighten up once more: “What do you think you’re doi-”

Yet, despite his wish to yell at the other for her over-familiar gesture, he was silenced both by the cat and by the sight caught by his eyes.

-“Hush and look up,” she simply said, pointing at the ceiling, forcing him back down. She lied down as well, putting her chef’s hat aside as she did so. Snatcher stopped moving as he stared at what was above him, speechless with awe. A glass ceiling, one he could see through, one that showed him many stars and planets so, so far away from him and yet so beautiful.

-“What-,” started the former ghost, only to close his mouth, not sure what to say. A lot of conflicted emotions were echoing in his mind, like exasperation, impatience but, most of all, confusion. Why would she bring him here out of every room in the spaceship? Why would she make him lie down to look at Space -not that he’d complain about that last point- ? What was she trying to achieve by doing so? Snatcher didn’t understand and that only made him even more irritated.

Thankfully, Cooking Cat seemed to pick up on his emotions without having him explain them in details. It really was impressive how she managed to read people like open books and, in a way, that made the man quite uneasy. Knowing his heart could be so exposed to someone he barely knew… This was not something he enjoyed.

-“Thought you might like this,” she explained calmly: “I wanted to talk to you in private and, well, we might as well be in the nicest room of the ship, right? Plus… We have such a good view, here.”

Snatcher stared at her, not sure what to answer at first. Yet… He could only agree. They did have a really good view. The stars were all shiny, very distinct from the black, interstellar void. Planets could be seen in the distance, like ants walking on the glass ceiling. Somehow, lying down and watching all of that gave the man the feeling of floating above water, as if he were drifting away and seeing the sky moving. In a way… This wasn’t entirely false, as the ship was drifting away. Still, the sight remained particularly magnificent and very different from what he was used to see in Subcon Forest, even at the top of his tree.

-“There isn’t anything to talk about,” replied Snatcher with a scowl, glancing away. Why would he talk to someone he just met? He would be stupid to do so, especially since he didn’t even like talking to people to begin with. Well, unless they could be useful to him in any way, he supposed. In any case, personal topics were a definite no-no and nothing this cat could say would change anything.

-“Really?” answered Cooking Cat with a false surprised intonation: “I thought you’d like to hear about one of the tales I was told when I was only a kitten, you know, the one about you.”

Okay, maybe Snatcher was ready to talk about some personal topics.

He squinted, wary, eying the cat with suspicion:

-“You’re trying to gain my trust to make me talk, aren’t you?” he accused her, though she only smiled more at his accusations, lifting her paw to her heart to feign being hurt by them.

-“Me?” she gasped with exaggeration: “Oh, no, I would never!”

The man just frowned even more. Yeah, she was totally trying to make him talk. At this thought, he let out a long and loud irritated sigh. Whatever, it wasn’t like he could get out of this situation anyway. He had the feeling the cat wouldn’t let him, especially with how he had behaved earlier. And so, what could he do but to endure this, if it meant he could leave faster and stay alone to mope just like he wanted to? Thus, with an audible and exaggerated groan, Snatcher agreed.

-“Fine,” he grunted, already feeling he was going to regret this, “Hope it’s scary, otherwise keep it to yourself,”

-“Oh, it is,” she confirmed, nodding vigorously: “It kept me up at night many times. We were told that naughty kittens would be taken away by a mysterious spirit called “The Snatcher”, only to be eaten and forgotten by their family.”

The former shade listened attentively, wondering where the story would go. Well, so far, the story was half true. He didn’t kidnap kittens, but he did eat people somewhat, so heh, close enough.

-“So, I was your Bogeyman equivalent, basically,” he interrupted, not sure what to think of that. It was nice to know he terrified children, but being compared with such a ridiculous monster was kind of an insult. His words made his interlocutor laugh though, and she continued telling her story:

-“Ahaha, yeah, pretty much! I used to fake not being scared by it in front of my parents, but as soon as night came, I would always shake like a leaf under my bedsheets. It lasted a few years, I must admit,” she giggled awkwardly at the memory: “But you know, I’m glad I was scared of you as a kitten,” she confessed, glancing back at him with a warm smile.

-“Why?” retorted Snatcher, quite perplexed. Why would someone be happy about something like that? Usually, people would do everything to repress childhood traumas like this, or at least laugh about it later… But being happy about it? This sounded off, if not just wrong.

-“Because one night, I was so scared I couldn’t sleep. And so, I slipped out of bed and rummaged through my parents’ bookcase, doing my best not to wake them up… And then, I found what changed my whole life.”

-“And that was…?” asked Snatcher curiously, still wondering how he could have indirectly impacted someone’s life so much. He disliked helping people, so even doing so without actually wanting to made him frustrated.

-“The first cooking book I ever read,” she told him with, perhaps, the most heartfelt expression he had ever seen: “It wasn’t special or anything, just an old book my mother had kept just not to throw it away… But I was immediately hooked on it. Just thinking about creating something new from completely different ingredients… It’s, woah, you know?”

The former spirit remained silent, not sure how to answer. He wanted to retort something disagreeable, he wanted to shut her up, wanted not to listen to her sappy backstory… And yet, he kept his mouth close, for a reason he couldn’t quite place.

Was he becoming soft?!

Hating the sound of that thought, he just scoffed at her words. Yet, he already knew it wasn’t as sincere as his usual mockeries were. It felt like he was just trying to prove to himself that he was still the horrible and terrifying ghost he had been the last few centuries. This just made him feel ridiculous, ugh.

-“Hey, it’s true!” protested Cooking Cat with a little nudge, though she didn’t seem like she was offended by his attitude. Instead, she seemed to take it lightly, like a joke or something: “I remember that time so clearly. I went down in the kitchen in the middle of the night and I tried cooking something from the book. But not only did I end up cooking something that tasted terrible, but I also woke up my parents in the process!” she started to laugh again, staring into space as she looked like she was remembering it fondly: “Oh, they were mad, really mad, I can tell you that. But still, it made me realize how much I loved cooking and it soon became my dream job afterwards.”

-“Couldn’t have guessed,” he remarked sarcastically, hinting at her own name, which was pretty obvious on that regard.

-“Oh, hush!” she nudged him once more, still mischievously. Her smile faded after a few moments and she let her eyes wander in the interstellar void. Silent fell between the two and Snatcher couldn’t help but imitate her, watching the stars drift away through the window, his ears catching up on the many sounds caused by the ship. The constant whirring of the engine was… Soothing, so much that he almost fell back asleep at some point, only to be brought back to reality as Cooking Cat started to talk again:

-“So, I guess… I wanted to thank you. For existing and for being you, I mean,” she said softly: “Without you, I wouldn’t have become what I am today. Thank you.”

Snatcher glanced away, his expression turning bitter. He didn’t want to be thanked for anything. He didn’t want to help anyone, he didn’t want to be nice, even indirectly! He was a soul-stealing ghost, an entity who had murdered countless of people and had done so without feeling any guilt!

… Well, he didn’t anymore, at least. But that wasn’t the point!

Apparently, his face must have been pretty obvious to read as the cat spoke again, an embarrassed tone in her voice:

-“Sorry, I think I said more than I should have,” she confessed, giving him an apologetic look: “I didn’t want to make you feel ill-at-ease. But, if that makes you feel any better, you did give me plenty of nightmares as a kitten, so that makes us even, right?”

The former spirit only scoffed again, this time much more sincere than the last. Gods, this was so sappy, he could almost throw up because of it… Well, figure of speech, considering that he didn’t really want to experience that out of everything possible from being back from the dead. Still, this was some mushy stuff right there, exactly what exasperated him the most.

And yet, he kept his mouth closed once more. The other waited patiently, not pushing him to say or do anything and… It really felt nice. And while he was still feeling pretty… Bad, it was still better than a while ago. At least, he was calmer and less likely to snap.

It is only at that moment he realized that Cooking Cat’s purpose had not been to make him talk about his feelings… But just make him feel better, if only a little bit, never forcing him to listen if he didn’t want to. Snatcher frowned, though it wasn’t from irritation this time.

He was feeling guilty and he hated that. Why did he have to feel things like that?! However, the former shade did his best to push that thought away, very much aware that this would only lead him to snap again. And so, Snatcher took a deep breath, closing his eyes as he did so. He couldn’t describe how much he had needed that.

-“You know,” he reopened his eyes after a few minutes of silence, “You’re bad at telling scary stories,” he eventually said, the tinge of a smile on his lips.

Cooking Cat smiled back at him, not taking that as an insult… Because it wasn’t really one, in the end. Fortunately, she was observant enough to notice that instantly.

-“I know, I know,” she answered with a short giggle, before continuing, her eyes fixed on his as a more serious expression appeared on her features: “I hope you’ll teach me someday, though.”

The message between those words was clear to the man: “I’ll always be there if you need to talk again, never fear to ask”. Although… He couldn’t deny he was quite hesitant on the matter. After centuries spent without talking to anyone about his -ugh- ‘feelings’, suddenly doing so wasn’t really easy. On the contrary, it was pretty difficult. However, another thing he couldn’t deny was how he felt a bit better after talking to the cat, even if they hadn’t talked about anything related to the recent events. But perhaps it was the reason, maybe he was feeling better because she hadn’t mentioned anything about that, because she had let him choose whether he wanted help or not… And it felt nice, to have his boundaries being respected like that.

He had needed this.

-“Maybe,” he finally replied with a small nod, his eyes fixed on the glass ceiling: “not sure you can handle it, though, I am pretty scary,” he joked, even though it was still a little hard to do so considering how he was feeling at the moment. But it did the job and Cooking Cat laughed again:

-“Oh, don’t worry, I’m kind of stubborn,” she assured him. After a few more moments of silence, she stood up, catching Snatcher’s attention: “The girls must be waiting for us, by now. Let’s go back,” she told him, offering her hand to help him to stand up.

The thought of seeing the brats again after the incident in the kitchen made him quite uneasy, for obvious reasons. It would be stupid to wonder about what they talked about, considering what had just happened. He didn’t really want to see them now, yet some part of him knew that waiting would just make things worse. And as they were the only persons in the world able to revert him to his spectral form… It was best to avoid any conflict with them.

And so… Snatcher took Cooking Cat’s paw, the cat waiting patiently for him to do so. He stood up just like her, his posture tensed as he agreed to her words:

-“Yeah… Let’s go back.”

Whether the bad feeling he had about this was going to become reality or was just the product of his pessimistic nature… He didn’t know yet. But he would very soon.

Snatcher did not look forward to it.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_- 

I had so much fun writing this dialogue when, in reality, dialogue is one of my weak points, alongside writing action scenes. I hope you liked this chapter ! It wasn't the longest one but it was one of them! (7 pages and approximately 3700 words).

I read all of your comments and I love every single one of them. Thank you so much for following me and my fanfictions, thank you for leaving kudos and thank you for leaving such lovely comments. It really means so much to me, I mean it.

See you on the next chapter, take care everyone ! :)

=> Chapter 13

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #348

“nothing will be free  /  nothing will be done  /  black out the sun”

Do you have any famous relatives? My third or so cousin is the author of Not Without My Daughter, but she's not like a smash hit or anything that most people know. I really do recommend the book, though. It's a long read, but a beautiful, true story. Do you care about celebrity gossip? Nah. Have you ever failed a science course in high school? No; I was very good at science. What’s your favorite breakfast food? Cinnamon rolls. Does your house have a basement? No. No house I've ever lived in has had one. Do you like Hot Topic? Well duh. Do you think imagination is valuable? VERY! Just imagine how many incredible things wouldn't exist without it. What was your reaction to your first time falling in love? Unspeakably happy, and I felt like I was building a future with someone. I felt like I had purpose, which I should mention to anyone reading is a mindset to NEVER adopt. No one gives you purpose; you're born with it. How much weight can you lift at once? Ha, not a lot. When you have your own house someday, what color Christmas tree do you want and how will you decorate it? I want a black one with faux snow on the branches, then maybe red ornaments. Kinda look like blood dripping off. Sounds metal. Name three YouTube channels you’ve been loving lately. Lately, John Wolfe, The Dark Den, and Aim To Head Mix. Have you ever bought a designer purse? No. Do you wear jewelry often? No. What color was your senior prom dress? Black. Are you colorblind? No. Name the people you know who are colorblind. Jason's older brother is colorblind to two colors, but idr which. Would you ever consider a career in writing? I'd love to. What was your first favorite color? Red. What do you think about horror movies? I love them. If you love them, what’s your favorite? I really enjoy The Crazies and both The Blair Witch Project movies. Oh, and of course Silent Hill. Got any cool Christmas presents picked out for family or friends yet? I don't have the money to get anyone presents... and while I sometimes get ideas about something I could make someone, then it wouldn't be fair to the rest of my family if I don't make them something, too. What’s your favorite word and why? I really like the sound of "serendipity," as well as its meaning. It's just a pretty, nice word. Do you like to do craft projects? If so, what’s the coolest thing you made? Not really... I think the coolest thing I made was when I put the clay heart I made in Art into a shadowbox, and a poem I wrote was in the background. It was a gift for Jason. I remember working really hard on the whole process and being really happy with it. I don't want to know what he's done with it since. What’s one occupation you think gets paid too much and doesn’t deserve to? I don't know. What’s something you are currently saving money for to buy? Everyone knows about Venus' terrarium by now... Do you smoke/vape? If so, what brand do you smoke/what device do you use? No. Ever done drugs? No. Tell me one of your worst habits. Catastrophizing. I take a tiny seed of something potentially bad, and in seconds it's a damn redwood tree. And I do mean "in seconds." What’s a weird quirk you have that no one else you know does? I don't know, I don't have any particularly unique ones, I think. If you game, what type of headset do you use? I just use earbuds. Do you think you would be a good therapist? You know, it's funny, I've actually pictured myself as one a few times, given my level of understanding and empathy for people, as well as how deeply I want to see others succeed and spread the word that recovery from things like depression is very possible. I've never truly entertained the thought, though, given I'm quite sure I legally couldn't be given my suicidal past and mental illnesses. There is also NO way I could listen to so many people's suffering and manage to stay healthy myself, so, no therapist position for me, thanks. Have you ever been to a Chinatown? No. Do you prefer chunky or creamy peanut butter? Creamy, 100%. Do you stop to pick up heads-up pennies? No. Do your pets have collars? Describe them: Roman has an adorable navy one with a bowtie. Do you have any friends that speak any languages you don’t understand? Old friends, sure. What is something you want to begin learning? I want to improve my ability to perform what in therapy is called "opposite action," where you do the opposite of what your depression (or other conditions) make you want to do. It always helps me feel good, like when I draw even when I don't initially feel like it, but it's rough to really force yourself to do it. What is a food you find comforting when you are sad? Ice cream is my comfort food. What is a quote you find comfort in? There are really a lot, but none come to mind immediately, gah. What is one Tumblr blog you really appreciate? I actually haven't been on my main Tumblr in months, but oh my god there is a Markiplier blog called "lady-raziel" and she is FUCKING HYSTERICAL. The meme quality is A+. What is a comfort movie/show for you? When I actually liked watching movies, I enjoyed watching Silent Hill when I was down. That whole franchise just makes me so happy. What is a recent creative project that you are proud of? That I'm PROUD of, idk. I'm not that happy with the last drawing I made, and I haven't done any serious writing lately that I find noteworthy. What is a video game that you find comforting? Shadow of the Colossus is probably #1. I find it so relaxing while equally epic as fuck. The soundtrack is to die for, and after playing it a billion times, it's pretty easy for me to kinda breeze through and just enjoy myself. Do you know how to bake bread? If so, what is something you’ve baked recently? No. Would you rather live in the mountains, city, beach, or the forest? THE MOUNTAINS!!! Particularly in the woods IN the mountains! Are you closer to your mother’s or father’s side of the family? Mom's. I don't even remember anyone from Dad's. Have you ever been in a “perfect relationship”? I thought so. Have you ever lost a fingernail or toenail? No. Were you a Disney or Nickelodeon kid? I preferred Disney. Have you ever been inside a jail/prison? No, and I don't plan on it. Have you ever dated a guy with a beard, mustache, or goatee? Jason had a goatee usually. He'd go clean-shaven sometimes. Did you ever name your stuffed animals? I named every single one I got as a kid. Now I don't, really, unless they're really special. What’s the name of the person who cuts your hair? I'd rather not share, given her name is very unique. Do you like cheeseburgers? Yes, they're one of my favorite foods. Do you have a Flickr? Yes, but I don't use it anymore. Did you ever want to be a fashion designer? No. Do you drink milk? Yeah, I love milk. Where was your FB display pic taken? My room. Have you ever burnt your tongue like REALLY bad? If so, what on? Yeah; white rice. My dumb ass didn't realize it had JUST come off the stove. My tongue hurt literally for weeks. Have you ever gotten your legs waxed? No. Do you own any CLOTHES from Victoria’s Secret? Er, are undergarments not clothes? But I know what you mean. No. What are your grandfathers’ names? William and... I can't remember Dad's dad's name. Have you ever seen a snake in real life? Well yeah. Are you against seances? I don't know if I believe in them being effective, but either way, they seem like a bad idea. Even risking luring a negative energy/spirit to you is something I'd stay away from. Do you own any superhero shirts? No, just Harley Quinn ones, some with the Joker on them, too. I need to toss 'em though because I am like, violently against romanticizing their abusive relationship. I used to just like them as a story character couple, but I got to a place where it just seemed... wrong to "glorify" it by wearing merch and stuff. What band has the best guitar solos? Metallica, durrrr. Who is the biggest jerk you’ve ever met? Can you believe that would be my former best friend? Have you ever swerved off the road to avoid hitting an animal? I've never had an animal in my path. Have you ever grown your own herbs? No. Do you like kissing in public? If you're my serious s/o, I could care less, so long as it's a simple peck. I'm not making out in front of people. Do you think someone has feelings for you? I don't know. Do you want to be in a relationship this year? I don't know. I'm lonely and love feels amazing, but I need to get my life on track before I can be a good partner to someone and not just dead weight. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? Huh, funny, he's the one that walked away. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander? Uhhh that would depend on how serious we are, where we are, and just what mood I'm in. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you? ugh What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone? also ugh What’s your dirtiest secret? TMI AHEAD. Probably receiving oral while bare-ass naked on the chaise in the living room while we were home alone. Or having sex in my sister’s bed. Oops. Would you ever get lyrics tattooed on yourself? Yeah. I already do, anyway, and I plan on getting another. Can you photoshop images well? I'm decent at it. Where did you last drive to? Mom and I went to go get our Covid vaccines today. What’s the first verse of the last song you listened to? "I don't know what we're supposed to be, but I know we lost it along the way to something better, something so much more than pleasure that we seek, so blind inside to fill these holes left by these lies that we tell to ourselves as we manufacture our own hell." What do you hear right now? The aforementioned song: "BLACKOUT" by 3TEETH. What was the last thing you laughed about? This is so fucking immature lmao but when we were driving earlier, we passed a gas station that had a sign that was advertising Coke, but due to space limitations, it abbreviated to "2 liter Cok" and I cackled like a child. Mom laughed harder than I did. Do you know any gay people personally? Ye. What was the last thing that startled you? I think it was a car hoonking at somebody the other day. What was the last thing to make you even remotely sad? Today's been a kind of rough PTSD day thanks to Facebook. My old high school friend had her beautiful daughter, a childhood friend just got married the other day, another friend is due to have her baby in just a couple weeks... It's just weird but even more painful to know it was the life I once fantasized about with a guy that just dropped me and made a break for it. I hate admitting that there's this deep, deep bitterness in me about it, like he took my life away from me, even though that's of course very unfair to say. I don't want to talk about this anymore, so moving on with my day.

[that-banana-headed-bovine]

Season 2 Shenanigans

AHEYYY sO I went on a giant Knight Rider binge the last few days, and I've FINALLY seen all of Season 2!!  Big thank you to @trust-doesnt-oxidize who watched with me and stayed up absurdly late because I wanted to see Garthe before I went to bed AIDBWJFNEM

I just wanted to post a quick reaction to all of the episodes, spoiler warning activated!

Goliath Parts 1 & 2

I LOVE MY DOOFY VILLAIN SON. K.I.T.T. is HILARIOUS, I love his dynamic with Goliath, as is evident by my handle oops- I hate how Season 2 starts with my son almost dying tho, almost had a heart attack tyvm! This is back before I knew anything about the direction of the rest of the series so I was legitimately in shock lmbo- Moustache Michael is a gem tho I love him. I SURE HOPE HE STAYS A DUMB VILLAIN WHO'S JUST REALLY SILLY TO WATCH. SURE HOPE THEY DON'T TAKE HIM TOO SERIOUSLY.

Brother's Keeper - Blind Spot

I- forgot that these episodes existed until I looked at the episode list for this, soooo...

I should really not be lazy and look up an episode summary and try to remember what I thought of these but the problem is that I am in fact going to be lazy because this post is already taking so long

Return to Cadiz

This episode is so,,, frustrating.  Not the plot or the format or anything like that, nono... I mean how they essentially introduced April.  Like, okay, I know that she has been here since the beginning of Season 2, but she hadn’t really said much up until now.  This was where we really got to know who she would be, and, uh... After this episode, I absolutely hated her.  Despised even.  She forces my son to go drive on the same ocean on the same beach where Karr DIED without any testing beforehand AND is chastising Michael in a flirtatious way.  The heCK is this woman?!  WHERE’S MY BONNIE???!!!  I was so mad at her you guys I.  But the thing is, I don’t hate April, not by a long shot.  In some ways, the rest of Season 2 does a better job giving her a character than all of Season 1 did for Bonnie!  I really enjoyed April and wish that both could have stayed.  BUT THIS EPISODE makes her SO HATEABLE and I just ugh.

also I tried to watch this a long time before I got to and after seeing the intro and not knowing the title of K.I.T.T. vs. K.A.R.R. at that point in time, I thought Karr was gonna come back based on all the panoramic shots of the underwater and I am so sad that he didn’t so oops this episode gets my wrath a bit

K.I.T.T. the Cat

0/10 there are no cats.  False advertising.

Seriously tho this episode was a pretty run of the mill episode.  The best part of the episode was Kitt, because it always is, but seriously that guy with the hedges was amazing- I GOT THE GAG BY THE THIRD TIME IT HAPPENED BUT THE FIRST TIME HE GOT STUCK IN THE TREE OH MY GOSH I WAS DY I N G- Also the fact that Kitt messed him up again trying to apologize is so sad yet funny ahosihdfiohasdf

Custom K.I.T.T.

APRIL GET THAT STUPID DECAL OFF HIM OH MY G O S H-

Somehow her 2-d design ideas looked almost worse than the actual thing and I thought the actual thing looked like a that default sticker decal that you get on a Hotwheels car.  I’msorryI’mnottryingtoroastanyartistsIjust I why there’s so much potential with giving Kitt decals :(

Seriously I want to use my drawing software to draw fire on Kitt at some point because it could be done so cool and that ain’t it chief.  I’m probably not going to be too great at it either since I don’t do backgrounds nearly enough and fire would be a background element for the most part but I could at least alter the colors ; m ;  OR LIGHTNING OH MY GOSH AAA LIGHTNING WOULD BE SO COO L ON HIM-  anyway it needed so much more red- and it was so asymmetrical too aHHHH-

I.  I’m fine it’s fine I’m fine it’s fi-

I don’t even know why Kitt needed a decal anyway, the other cars didn’t have to have decals to be considered custom, surely his dash alone could have done it-

ANYWAY

This ep was so WEIRD at times oh my gosh.  What was that series of insults the two ladies spat at each other?  Like the one just complimented her eyeshadow aggressively and the other one accused her of wearing “training bras” or something like whAT EXCU S E ME What is this episode?!  Kitt was so upset about the decal too :[

Soul Survivor

OH MY GOSH IT’S CUTE IT’S SO CUTE YOU GUYS-

I was recalling @knight-rider-fan-2000‘s theory about this episode (plz go check them out btw aaaa), and after watching it I totally agree.  Michael was especially kind in this episode, and he seems to be overall a more supportive mentor for Kitt this season, starting with Soul Survivor and being pretty consistent throughout.  I love their new dynamic so much- There’s definitely still episodes and moments where he’s closer to Season 1 Michael, but Season 2 Michael is a far superior human being in my opinion.

KITT’S SO ADORABLE LIL TINY CPU OH MY G O S H YOU’RE TELLING ME OUR SON IS ACTUALLY T H A T SMALL AAAAA

Michael really is so sweet in this oh my gosh, that whole arc where Kitt is his partner no matter what and that the car isn’t what made Kitt-- AW!!!!  ADORABLE!  Kitt being so unsure that he repeatedly asks Michael how it feels to see the Knight 2000 without him in it or fusses about his limited functionality as Michael patiently reassures him again and again that he’s wanted just the way he is, I just- Feelings.

One thing that hit me as funny though is when Michael finds Kitt’s CPU in the garage and the trash can is just like PULSATING and then he like yells at it like “tAlK tO mE kItT” and Kitt’s jus sitting there as a box of colored lights like “...”

I can just imagine a cut scene where Kitt’s like, “Oh and by the way Michael, if I could have said something I would have done so LONG before you started asking me to.  Believe it or not, I don’t like being in a trash can.”

“You Dingaling.”

Also Michael and his whole “I’m an honest man you can trust me listen I’ll give you a small TV just like this one” and then he proceeded to not do that.  Hmm.

Anyway, yeah, it doesn’t get any cuter than this.  The only thing that would have been better is if Adrianne didn’t exist.  Good thing she’s gone now~!

Ring of Fire

THIS IS SO TRIPPY THIS EPISODE IS SO TRIPPY

I would say that I hate Michael trying to get Kitt to subject himself to testing if he can withstand insane levels of heat.  I would say that if April did not then walk in and karma the crap out of him.  Gosh I loved it.  How he immediately was like whAT NOOO YOU WOULDN’T MAKE SOMEONE DO THAT and Kitt’s just like :/

dang hypocrite, Michael my feelings towards you are so complicated sometimes

anyway

So. Many. Dogs.  I usually love seeing Kitt interact with dogs but this started to get unsettling, I can’t blame him for not loving 6 different dogs all swarming him at once whAT- Have they nothing better to do than to jump on my son.  What the heck language were those banjo players singing in?  Was it a language or was it just gibberish keyboard spam that accidentally made it to the final script AOSHDIAOHSD

This whole swamp setting is really unique to this episode, and part of me really does commend the chance they took by switching up settings.  It’s almost always a small town on desert roads.  The way this all happened though was??? What?

I think the scriptwriters forgot that Return to Cadiz exists because Kitt got so much water damage AHSIDHAOISDH- I know April said the system was damaged but surely it would have minimized this a little bit.  Also did literally anything change by the end of this episode?  We didn’t see the guy get arrested, did we?  And the girl decided to stay living out in the swamp forest thing.  The only thing is that she, like, conquered her fear or something?  Even though she still isn’t acting in that direction?

This episode didn’t actually d o anything did it LOL

alsowhatevenwasthatexplosion

It’s not a bad episode though, just really bizarre.

Knightmares

YOU KNOW WHAT I SAID ABOUT IT NOT GETTING ANY CUTER?

I WAS WRONG.

THIS EPISODE this episode THIS EPISODE.  TOP TWO MATERIAL?  MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK.  TDR will always be my fav until the end of time I’m pretty sure because I don’t think another episode will get me to ugly sob like that (aLTHOUGH I AM MEGA HYPE HERE BECAUSE I WATCHED KvK AND IT WAS GOOD ALSO BUT WE’LL GET TO TH A T LATER) but in terms of sheer adorable buddies happiness this is the winner by all accounts.  I really like how they portray Michael Long, and I genuinely think the arc here has an impact on the rest of the season in terms of how Michael treats Kitt.

I love how Michael had told Kitt a long time ago how they were partners, like how he used to have a partner when he was a police officer, and how now when Long is so confused about everything everyone is trying to tell him, Kitt chooses this specific word to help introduce himself, and everything feels a bit more grounded for Long.  I love how Long immediately revolts against the way Devon and April try to tell him he’s wrong about who he is currently, which is, despite good intentions, the opposite of what he needs.  I love how Kitt then swoops in behind him and decides to treat Michael Long like a WHOLE NEW PERSON, one who Kitt tries to get to know.  I love how Long recognizes just how hard Kitt is trying and genuinely opens up to him.  I love how he never reverts to being mean or rude to Kitt after he gets in the car the second time, NOT EVEN ONE sarcastic comment.  How he never calls him a computer again after Kitt asks him not to, how he compliments his new partner left and right, how despite having no clue who Knight is he really wants to be that person for Kitt, because Kitt seems sincere and pretty great.  I adore that bit where Kitt gently, lovingly lists traits good and bad about Knight and how Long can finally connect to this other version of himself.

“One more thing about Michael Knight.”

“What’s that?”

“I was extremely fond of him”

I love how Long starts saying “Good work, Kitt” after they complete parts of their mission and how Knight does not stop this for the rest of the season, even after he regains his memory.  I love so much about this and could frankly talk about it even more than this but this is a brief summary so.  So yeah, we’re moving on ;W;

Silent Knight

It’s funny so.  I didn’t realize that Knight Rider had done any Christmas specials.  I knew about the Halloween specials, but I didn’t realize the Christmas special existed.  And so I was laughing at how funnee I was while I was like “SILENT KNIGHT HOLY KNIGHT ALL IS COME-” and then that’s exactly what the pun was meant to be.  they done bamboozled me.

ANYWAY THIS MIGHT BE THE STRANGEST CHRISTMAS SPECIAL TO EVER EXIST EVER.

They kept mentioning the Christmas banquet thing to make it mildly related to the season but then it wasn’t, it really wasn’t, it all revolved around clowns.  There was.  There was a Santa I guess.  Albeit a bank robber Santa--

And the kid is juuust obnoxious at first, I love how Kitt absolutely hates him immediately for some reason even though Kitt usually doesn’t hate people unless they do something really bad, but it feels so deserved because the kid is a jeeerk.  Maybe it’s because the kid accused him of endangering human life and that Hurt?

Kid: Just let me drive and I’ll throw away this dumb clock thing

Michael: No

Kitt: YES

Michael: W H A T ?!

Kitt: YES

Michael: ugh whatever

I was kind of expecting Kitt to pull some sort of shenanigans while the kid was driving as payback for whatever he absolutely despised him for, but Kitt was actually just really sweet and gave him a bit of freedom until he started endangering himself and then helped him get back into control.  Very wholesome.

AND the end was CUTE though, like the boy who had previously been a jerk going over and patting Kitt and being just sincerely nice to him ;w; wholesome

A Knight in Shining Armor

Gosh I always forget what this episode is about because the title is so loosely related LOL

The dynamic with Michael and the girl of the week was actually really cute and chemistry was not entirely nonexistant, so that’s a nice change from some of these that come out of nowhere.  Her arc was actually pretty sweet, how she resented technology because she wanted to be loved and cared about, how she thought computers were incapable of doing that until she talked to Kitt...

And the cave was prebby.

But why couldn’t she understand that her DAD was in PRISON.

“Why didn’t he ever come to see me?” “Because he was in Jail.” “oh.  But why didn’t he call???”

Diamonds Aren't a Girl's Best Friend

SOMEONE

AHAHA

SOMEONE CALLED MICHAEL

AHAHA

BERNIE CALLED HIM A DINGALING. Speaking of Bernie, all I could think this whole episode was

White-Line Warriors

LONG-LEGGED PUNK-

Seriously idk what this season’s love affair with the baddies picking on Michael but I love it.

Honestly the twist of this episode was really interesting, I still don’t fully get how the baddies’ plan comes together though.  So the song plays on the radio and the police go to investigate the drag racers and the crims are IMMEDIATELY ready?  okay then.

Radio announcer Kitt tho.  That is blessed.

I want Radio Announcer Kitt.  Then again, I just want more Kitt in general so.

Race for Life

INHALE

Y’ALL ARE REAAALLY TRYING TO MAKE ME DETHRONE KNIGHTMARES AS THE CUTEST, AREN’T YOU?

Well ha, joke’s on you episode, you’re getting docked points for only giving Kitt and Becky two interactions.  And for making the donor obnoxious for most of the episode (although that end scene was pretty adorable).  So, okay, second cutest.

THE WAY KITT WAVED I-

HE IS SO CUTE

he is so cute.

Devon was really sweet this episode, not gonna lie.  I’m not sure if I’ve said it on this blog before, but I had strong dislike for Devon after Season 1.  I can explain that later if anyone wants, I’d be perfectly willing to compare the two seasons, but Season 2 Devon is pretty alright.  He doesn’t have much of a presence, but when he does, he’s kind.  I’m assuming he let Becky win at checkers, in which case uh, aW?!  Devon that’s cute.

KITT TRYING TO TEACH THE TEN YEAR OLD CHESS AHSIODHOAISD I LOVE YOU BUDDY

Also, I feel like this is the episode April really became her own character, separate from Cadiz.  She’d kind of just been a slightly perkier Bonnie, but now we get to see her family, her concerns... And April’s a pretty good character.

OH AND THE WHOLE “Kitt is family” ARC IS THE SWEETEST THING ASHDHAOSDohIAD

“Julio, meet Kitt.  He’s part of the family”

“Thank you, Michael.”

MY.  HEART.

Speed Demons

Okay so.  This is another one of those episodes where very little seemed to change by the end of the episode.  The guy who was actually in danger quit motorcycling anyway soooo...  The episode plot itself isn’t what I feel like talking about.

What was WITH that one announcer guy?  Were we meant to like him or not???  First he tries to Kick the Kitt and Kitt’s like :/ whatever

and then he comes back and they start to have like, a deep conversation, and he lovingly pats the hood before walking away.  And we’re like AWWW OKAY THIS GUY IS NOT TO BAD

AND THEN he asks Kitt to talk for someone and Kitt’s like “...” and the guy riots.  Why did Kitt not talk for him and why did the guy go so absolutely bonkers when he didn’t?  Were the cameras rolling and I just didn’t realize?  And then we kind of hate the guy again because he once again absolutely went ballistic at Kitt.  “That’s Showbiz.”

But then the dynamic with that coworker keeps coming up, and yeah, I guess she does seem a bit annoying.  But she also seems like a potential lady of the week and a potential protagonist.  So when she gets splashed with mud or whatever that was and the guys all like :D

What are we meant to be feeling?

Are we meant to feel bad for her or happy for him?

Because I just felt confused.

Goliath Returns 1 & 2

GOSH DARNIT ADRIANNE IS BACK

ALSO I-I-I I TAKE BACK EVERYTHING I SAID ABOUT YOU BEING A DOOFY AND STUPID VILLAIN JUST P L E A S E STOP ; M ;

SERIOUSLY WHEN DID GARTHE TURN FULL PSYCHOPATH-

THE FEELING I GOT REMINDED ME OF WATCHING THE SHERLOCK FINALE.  S H E R L O C K  F I N A L E.

Sigh, I should have known he’d gone off the deep end when he walked into a hot tub with jeans on.

I will forever be mad at some versions coughincludingtheoneIwaswatchingoncough for cutting out the fact that Kitt’s microchip was almost ENTIRELY WIPED/OVERWRITTEN AND PUT INTO GOLIATH.  Because uh, the way the show cut it up for TV, it seems like Kitt’s really in no danger other than being annoyed.  But no, literally everyone almost dies.  Fun times!

Seriously why did this convoluted garbage get a two-parter but Kitt vs. Karr didn’t?

This episode makes me sad.  Not just because Garthe tried, and almost succeeded, to take away everything we love in this show.  Not just because this episode strayed far enough from the typical formula for this to seem like some dystopian nightmare version of Knight Rider. Not just because freaking Adrianne is back.

I mean because I loved Garthe’s character, and this totally changed it.  I like that they went into Garthe’s trauma a bit more with this one, but unlike some villains in the Knight Rider canon (okay let’s not play games, UNLIKE KARR-), what he does is so dastardly, SO insaNE, that there is no way to argue that he might be justified.  No.  No.  Garthe, Adrianne, and Goliath are gone now, and that’s how it had to be.

OH ALSO GO O F F APRIL YES QUEEN I LOVE YOU- I honestly felt so bad for her when she turned around and broke down right after standing up to him, like dang, that hurts.  And Devon was sweet in this episode too ;w;

Okay but were they planning on making another episode of this?  Because that end scene was such an obvious teaser it’s not even funny.

“I hope we don’t run into those very much drowned people out in the streets again, Michael.  And I especially hope that they do not construct another semitrailer with the exact same scale and name as the previous one that was driven into the ocean.”

“Yes, I agree Kitt, this is also an anxiety that I possess despite the fact that they are very much definitely Deceased.  I sure hope that plot convenience does not interfere in the future.”

THANK GOODNESS THAT ADRIANNE IS GONE

wait what?  her actress is in another episode as another character who’s just as awful? wHYYYYYY

A Good Knight's Work

THAT BEAR NEEDS TO DIE. I am so glad Michael ejected the dumb thing at the end, Kitt deserved it. Especially after Michael essentially told him to temporarily kill himself. Michael's a cyberbully now ig. The arc with Kitt and the car salesman was cute. Apparently deactivation is considered programming now? Michael my mans you could have given Kitt any warning at all (I kind of take this back after one of the Season 3 episodes I’ve watched uHHHH this was a lot of warning compared to how Michael rolls in S3 what the heck is wrong with him). Cute episode overall tho I guess. ALSO I JUST NOW REALIZED "A GOOD KNIGHT'S WORK" IS A PUN BECAUSE KITT IS WILTON KNIGHT'S WORK AND I'M MAD AT MYSELF FOR NOT NOTICING IT SOONER-

Mouth of the Snake and that other garbage one that's title makes no sense

David might as well be a plank of wood. A plank of wood that yeets himself ten feet into the air whenever possible, but I digress. Does this count as superpowers? I just love how he offended Kitt 0.1 seconds after meeting him and then Michael proceeded to tell Kitt off for reacting. Love that soooo much. It's also hilarious to me how most of this episode has a similar structure to most Knight Rider episodes and then they randomly start reacreating the Most Dangerous Game--

Let it Be Me

Why isn't this the season finale?! I mean, I'm glad it's not, but why? This is way worse than White Bird like why- I feel like the Stevie episodes are kind of a controversy in this fandom? I loved the first one. This one's just, blegh it's okay. She and Michael still have pretty great chemistry WHEN THEY ARE SPEAKING IN REGULAR SPEECH. I do not like Stevie singing the same song with Michael 100 times. The duet at the end is kind of cute though, sue me I like corny things.

Stevie: I’m so sorry I shouldn’t have been with this one guy but ;m;

Michael: has been with approximately 100 women by now

Also Michael: How could you ;m;

Big Iron

This episode is kinda wild. Why does the guy manage to have a full out breakup with Lucy in less than one minute? Why is Michael a marriage counselor now? Why couldn't Kitt take the oxygen out of the cabin when Michael was definitely going to die if he didn't?  Since when does Turbo Boost use a ton of oxygen anyway?  Why does this man just immediately make up with his wife after finding out that she helped him? And most of all, WHY DIDN'T THAT BARTENDER LADY ACT THE LEAST BIT CONCERNED WHEN THEY ABSOLUTELY TORE UP THE PLACE??? Lmbo she's just like "Stop it guys :/"

It’s so bizarre that this is the season finale ahsdoifhasodf but go off I guess NBC

[justjessame]

The Deal Chapter 70

It’s extremely difficult to get through to a child who has been beaten down, with fists AND words, to have a healthy understanding of how much worth they have in their family/community. That made the questions I had for Lydia about her mother and her mother’s role as Alpha damn near impossible to answer. Not that I stopped trying.

“Come on,” I took the keys down from the hook near the exit, unlocking Henry’s door first. “If you two so much as twitch and make me THINK you’re going to run, I’ll fucking make sure that running is the last thing either of you can do for the foreseeable future, understood?” I am forever shocked at how formidable I can sound standing at barely five foot tall, but watching Henry nod and swallow hard enough for me to hear it confirmed that he took my threat as seriously as I meant it.

Unlocking Lydia’s, I stood back and waited for her to exit. Before she could turn toward me, the main door opened and Daryl stood blocking the sunlight. Well played, I smiled up at him. “Taking ‘em for a walk?” I nodded and he stood back, waiting for our charges to join him outside.

This time, since he’d been listening to my issues with the current line of questioning, we worked in tandem. Trying to gather intelligence on how important Lydia was to her people, her mother, and their plans I let Daryl discuss it with her. Henry and I were, well Henry was moral support, I was a tagalong that wanted to tag my ass back home.

 I should have known, as the day grew longer, that my visit wouldn’t end happily. There was never a day that ended away from the relative safety of my own four walls that didn’t end covered in horseshit and sadness. Eventually, anyway.

I was inside, sitting with Tara, listening to her telling me all the reasons she didn’t want to lead Hilltop and was ill equipped for it reminded me of how Dad had felt so many different times over the years.

“You’re smiling. Why are you smiling?” She was staring at me like I’d grown a third head. And my smile grew.

“People who want to lead are usually ill suited for it, Tara, it’s the people who are forced to lead and do it reluctantly that are best at it.” I shook my head and then my smile dropped when we heard a commotion start outside. “What was that?”

That, it turned out, was Lydia’s people. Her mother, actually, since Alpha was the one who actually spoke. I stood beside Tara, looking down at the crowd of people who looked far more like walkers than humans, staring up at us as this lump of a woman demanded her daughter be returned to them. That they have two of ours, a man named Luke and Alden the blacksmith apprentice. A baby cried, and I felt my heart stop beating in my chest as Alpha mentions that we are all animals, and animals have babies. As the child cries, she demands its mother leave it, since it will draw the walkers and danger. Without hesitation, the woman does. My heart stops, seeing this person sit this completely innocent and fragile infant down and walk away.

The tears fell quietly from my eyes, even as the tiny infant’s arms waved, as its pitiful screams grew, and I felt the breath leave my body. Chaos, the cries, the mass of Alpha’s people, Daryl, walkers, Lydia- If I was asked later, and Negan did, I couldn’t say how long it took. Hours, minutes, days? I had no idea. Forever. No time.

I know that Lydia was greeted with a sharp slap by her mother. I know that Alden and Luke were back among our people. The baby, the tiny infant that was left to die as a distraction for beasts, was saved by one of the people that Judith rescued. Connie, a deaf woman, a woman who offered this baby to me as a gift as though someone told her that I would want it, that I would welcome it. I look at it like someone would look at poison ivy or the plague. Or I did if the look she gave me was any indication.

“She meant no harm, Jessi.” Daryl offered, standing next to me as I was preparing to take my leave the next day. Danger or no, I wanted to be home. I didn’t look at him, I didn’t dare. “Everyone knows-”

“That I’m broken?” I snorted, shaking my head and tightening the saddle on my horse. “Giving me a random baby because its mother is a genetic fucking asshole isn’t going to fix my broken uterus, Daryl Dixon.” I checked and double checked the saddle, I wanted nothing to slow my trip. “Can you hand me that-” I pointed at my bag and my bow. “The quiver is leaning next to-”

“The table, I got it.” He handed me each in turn. “No one said she was gonna fix ya, Jess.” He was careful not to touch my skin, remembering at least that much about my twitchy little self. “Can’t help but see how much it hurt ya to see-”

I laughed hard then, without a fucking hint of humor. “What fucking asshole wasn’t hurt to see it?” My eyes met his then, hot and hard. “Seriously? They left a BABY to fucking die, Daryl. RIGHT fucking there, daring us to watch.” I pointed, like he hadn’t bore witness too. “I CRIED. So fucking what?” I shook my head and after securing my bags, hooking my bow over the saddle horn, and getting situated myself, I put my quiver within easy reach. “I’m going home. Where people don’t usually randomly hand me infants as parting gifts.” I waved and headed out. Hoping like fuck I was finished with my part in this madness for a long while.

 I wasn’t home for more than a few hours, I fucking swear, when the entire bullshit showed up on my FUCKING doorstep. I wish I was joking. I truly do. I really truly do.

Teenagers. I swear, my dad got off so lucky with me. He might have teased that I had horrendous taste in the guys I dated, and I did, to be fair, but I wish he was around so I could point at Henry and go “REALLY?!”

First of all, he had ‘runaway’ with Lydia during her mother’s demands for her return at Hilltop. Then, once they were found, Lydia returned to her rightful place which I might remind everyone Daryl and I were NOT happy about, he decided to pretend that he was a knight in shining armor and go after her. I swear to GOD, someone (looking at you Carol) had better have a fucking conversation with Ezekiel about these grandiose ideas before they get someone fucking killed.

Which leads me to my doorstep. Or Alexandria’s gate. Daryl, Lydia, Connie (of the ‘here’s your new baby’ variety), and Henry (I came to rescue you m’lady, and oops I have a boo boo) all waiting at the gate. I was only excited to see Dog. And so was Mom.

 I was with Negan, who was listening to me as I railed against the entire fucking last hours of my visit to Hilltop, when Judith came to let me know we had visitors-AGAIN. Ugh.

“Go see,” Negan said, kissing my temple through the bars. “I doubt they brought the baby all this way,” he was teasing, I hoped. “Come back, tell me what’s going on. I love you.”

And after sighing heavily, reminding him that I loved him right fucking back, off I went to see what the high holy hell had gone fucking wrong again.

 The gist was our knight was wounded, our damsel was terrified and not sure she was worth it, and the adults were awkward (Daryl) and super unsure of me (Connie). But at least Dog was unscathed. While Henry got sutured in the infirmary, Connie and Mom bonded, Lydia kept her hero company and Judith got time with her uncle. That left me and my four legged pal, which I was pretty fucking pleased about.

I was playing with Dog, ignoring humans in general, when I overheard Mom giving Lydia a horrible nugget of advice that I felt the need to tell her my opinion on, since she insisted.

“Telling a young girl who is the victim of REPEATED extensive physical and emotional abuse that she should take her own safety into her own hands, is a pretty shitty way to lead, Mom.” I offered, keeping my eyes down as I ran my hands through Dog’s coat. “Don’t explain, you asked me to tell you my opinions, this is one.”

“She’s going to bring it down on our heads, Jessi.” Her voice was so low, I felt like her lips would barely be moving. “Can we afford more loss?”

I snorted. “Loss? Is that what we’re going to weigh now?” I shook my head and scratched Dog’s ears. “Humanity, Mom, count the humanity we cultivate.”

She came to me later, not much, just long enough that I’d seen Judith with Daryl and heard her asking him what our dad would do in Mom and the other leaders’ positions. Not a fair question, not really. She missed Daryl, I knew that, but I also knew that Daryl felt strained in Alexandria. Too cultured, which was hilarious since the first time it had been destroyed during the Savior War.

“Judith is-” She sighed, and I knew, I could feel it. The rebellion of my little sister. Her thirst for more understanding. To know more. “Negan thinks she’ll get it elsewhere if I don’t give it to her myself.”

“He’s not wrong.” I offered, handing her a drink. “I know you hate to hear that.”

“I do, but I want your honesty, and that’s what it is.” She smiled, and then sighed. “We’re going to The Kingdom. “Do you want to join us?” I shook my head. “Should I tell them to expect a long term visitor in his cell?” I laughed and asked if RJ was staying behind for me to take care of.

[razorblade180]

Twin Snowflakes Pt3: Checkup

[Saph’s Home]

Terra:*washing dishes*

Ruby:*walking downstairs* Hey Terra, seen the twins?

Terra:In the garden training. Haven’t seen that spot get much love and attention since you and Maria.

Ruby:It’s a tranquil spot. Always helped with clearing my head; especially with the pregnancy thing. *rubs arm*

Terra:*stops scrubbing* Still....not sure about adoption?

Ruby:*groans*........it goes back and forth in my head from time to time. I think deep down Whitley wants someone running around the house; training Nicholas to be heir one day has started to consist of just riding through the streets of Atlas.

Terra:Maybe he just wants him to know the streets well? Hehehehe.

Ruby:The streets he’s been around since he was born? Pretty sure he has them memorized Terra.

Terra:Yeah....I was just trying to, ya know.

Ruby:*chuckles* I appreciate the thought. You think after all this time I would be able to make a decision but I’m still dragging my feet. Frankly I don’t deserve his patience.

Terra:It’s not about deserving anything. When you love someone you’ll do practically anything for them. That being said, waiting is only gonna make you feel worse about it. Maybe revisit the conversation with him?

Ruby:*slumps over*.....can I get a glass of water?

Terra:One water, coming right up.

She goes to turn back on the faucet but nothing came out. No hot or cold water no matter which way she turned the handles. A long sigh escaped her as Ruby tried to contain her laughter. This isn’t the first time this has happened.

Ruby:How many times do you think they accidentally freeze the pipes?

Terra:I should really learn to wash dishes before they come around. *sighs*

[Garden]

Summer and Nick stand in the center holding both hands while facing each other. Ice around the floor is melting in various spots and both of them are out of breath; Summer more than Nick. They let on hand go and point to ground with their combined one. A glyph from each of them appears several inches away from their feet.

Nick:You sure huff you wanna try again? You look winded.

Summer:*shaking* Look who’s talking. huff we can take a break if you want? I’m perfectly fine.

Nick:I guess we’re doing this the. *inhales*

Slowly the two glyph merge into one. The intricate details of their family crest starts to glow as small sketches of swords swirl around it at increasing speed. Before long the entire glyph starts to get brighter as a hand reaches out of it. The twins try to keep their focus as the touches the floor to pull more of its icy, armor clad body out of the summoning glyph. After a minute of complete focus both of them were speechless to see a helmet start to arise; a ghostly light showing where it’s eyes would be. Sadly that’s all they got to see before Summer’s vision started to glow and she dropped to her hands knees with Nicholas quickly kneeling to aid her. The dual summoning quickly faded.

Nick:Summer!!? Are you okay?

Summer:Damnit......just huff just give me a minute okay? I’m sorry...

Nick:.......I think that’s enough for today.

Summer:What? No I’m-

Nick:Completely exhausted from earlier and out of stamina. Your body can’t take much more; let’s call it a day. *smiles*

Summer:........*leans on him* Sigh, once again I’m holding you back.

Nick:Pfft as if. I’m tired too ya know?

Summer:But you could keep going if you really wanted to. The only reason you stopped was because of me. I can never keep up with you.

Nick:I wouldn’t be too sure about that.

He props her up for a moment and let’s her hair down. At this point it’s almost as long as Weiss’s was when she was young. Summer looks at him weirdly as he combs his fingers through it to straighten it out a bit.

Summer:What are you doing?

Nick:Proving a point. You say you can never keep up with me but in terms of who’s the better looking twin, I’m always gonna lose. *smiles*

Summer:Geez you’re so dumb. *smiles*

Nick:I’m just saying I don’t have half as many people looking at as you do. All that beauty and talented singing draws a crowd.

Summer:People look at me because they know it makes me uncomfortable. The boys that stair are daft and any woman is judging or obviously don’t understand that they’re barking up the wrong tree.

Nick:Yoy should really tell Val that. Pretty sure she’s still holding onto hope.

Summer:Like how you’re holding onto hope for her?

Nick:*mumbles* I’m not holding onto anything.

Summer:If you say so. I’d give anything to be as amazing as you.....

Nick:But then you would be good at singing, a genius at glyphs, super calculated.....

Summer:You’re some of those things.

Nick:If I try time dilations I always shock myself or run into a wall. I don’t remember you ever doing that.

Summer:Nope, I over extend my arm doing rapid sword strikes unlike- OW!!!!!!

Nick:*grabbing her nose* Why are you trying so hard to stop me from building your self esteem? Who does that?

Summer:Nicholas this hurts!!

Nick:Say that you’re important and strong.

Summer:What are we five!?

Nick:*pinches harder*

Summer:I’m important and strong! I’m important and strong!!!!!!

Nick:Was that so hard? *lets go* all you needed was motivation.

Summer:*rubs nose* You sound like mom; you even pinch like her too.

Nick:Hey.......

Summer:Sigh What?

Nick:.......I’m only this strong because I have you. You’re the best partner I could ever ask for. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise alright?

His words sounded rather serious then; like it was almost challenging to say. He turned his head away but Summer could tell he was trying not to get emotional in front of her. Showing his feelings have never been problem in his life; their mother encouraged it greatly along with side their father. Still there were few things both of them had a bit of trouble when it came to being opened about certain things. Anyone who knows their history could guess why this topic made him sensitive; why he tried so hard to always be there for her. There was a time where those days could’ve ended before they truly began.

Summer:Listen Nick......I’m fine okay? See? *smiling* happy camper and ready for anything. You can’t cheer me up if you get all sad. What type of hypocrisy is that!?

Nick:*snorts* You’re right, thanks Summer. I’m gonna start packing; No doubt Auntie is gonna want to have us home before her scroll starts getting blown up with messages. * leaves*

Summer:I’ll be inside in a minute. Can you make sure all my dust vials are accounted for?

Nick:Ugh, so high maintenanced....

Summer:I love you Nick!

Nick:I love you too you butt!

Summer:That’s not how you build self esteem!

Nick:No but it’s how big brothers act! *closes door*

Summer:*lays down* “I’m important and strong.....”

“You called me the best partner you could ask for. That you needed me in order to be strong. Those words you told me that day meant more to me than you realize. I just.....I just wished I believed them like you did. Maybe then things could’ve been different; things could’ve been better........”

[Schnee Manor]

Many things in Atlas change with the trends and technology; the manor is not one of those things. Fabulous interior and pristine pillows all the same since when Jacques ran everything. One major difference though, it feels like a home. The house that held three children seen as property and two very broken adults now houses a much more charming family; Weiss’s family.

Currently she sits on the foot of her bed putting on icy blue heels that matches the casual, knee high dress she has on. Getting ready for the day has become much easier ever since she made her hair shoulder length. In no time at all she was ready for her date.

Weiss:Ready babe?

Jaune:*in a tux* Yeah it’s just this tie is giving me a bit of trouble.

Weiss:All this time and bow ties are still kicking your but. Let me see. *starts tying it*

Jaune:I can tie them just fine. I just needed you in arms reach. *holds her by the waist*

Weiss:If you wanted me close then all you needed to do was ask. *rubbing his face* want a kiss from your loving wife or something?

Jaune:I’m fine with just looking into your eyes and falling in love with you all over again.

Weiss:*blushing* Yeah you’re getting a kiss. *leaning in*

Nick:*door frame* Ugh so gross, right Summer?

Summer:*behind him* Super gross, they should really get a room.

Ruby:I know right?

*trio snickering*

Jaune:Well I guess the kids are back. *smiling*

Weiss:Yep, all three of them.

Ruby:Hey!!!! What’s that supposed to mean?

Weiss:That you maintain child like spirit.

Ruby:*squints* Not sure how to take that.

Weiss:That’s what makes you the greatest. *hugs her* So how was hanging with your aunties you two?

Twins:Fun and completely chill!

Nick:*whispers* literrally....

Summer:*elbows him* Anyways, the two of you look nice; going on a date?

Jaune:Yeah, we were just about to head out. We actually didn’t think you’d be home this soon. Is everything okay?

Ruby:Yeah, just thought these two should get some time at home before school starts in a few days.

Summer:It kills me every time you say that.

Jaune:Not looking forward to it?

Summer:School is just prison with less nutritious food.

Jaune:You are.....not wrong

Weiss:Jaune!

Jaune:I mean..... she’s not hehehe. Just enjoy the time you have left sweetie.

Summer:I know I know, I just rather be doing other things I suppose. Like making a song or something.

Nick:Just do that now.

Summer:It’ll be about hating school.

Nick:Sweet, I’ll play bass. Mom can sing backup.

Weiss:*scoffs* Backup, we duet or I’m out.

Summer:Wow, I see how it is. Can’t take the idol out of the mother now can we? Won’t even support her own daughter from the side light. *fake crying* Fine, I see how it is.

Weiss:Okay you mini drama queen. *hugs her*

Summer:I’m slightly taller than you. *hugging back*

Weiss:*sniffling* I know, it’s so unfair. Both of you have outgrown the person who brought you into this world. I guess that what happens when I marry a small giant.

Jaune:I’m not even that tall, you’re just short.

Weiss:*pouts* Just for that you get to pay for my dessert.

Ruby:Oooo get me something!

Weiss:I mean since you’re all here we could just make the date into a family dinner.

Nick:Nah, don’t let us get in the way of your date. I was actually thinking about getting some rest. Maybe going for a stroll outside or actually-

Weiss:Do your winter break project in time?

Nick:*sweats* Whaaaat? I’m done with that.

Everyone:.......

Nick:I’m gonna go double check it though. *runs off*

Summer:The sad thing about all that is in theory, that project is supposed to take the entire winter break to complete. Watch him finish in like two days; wish I could work under pressure like that.

Ruby:Trust me, it’s a skill that’s a blessing and a curse. Weiss has made me so many cups of coffee when I stayed up cramming. I should probably head out now. Whitley is probably still working so maybe I’ll surprise him.

Summer:If that’s the case can you give me lift? I guess now is a good as a time as any to check with the base.

Her family eyes widened in surprise. Jaune walks forward and gently cups her face. Their matching cobalt eyes meet each other with slight concern before she also cups his face and gives him a warm smile.

Jaune:You sure you don’t want any of us there for that?

Summer:I’ll be fine, it’s basically a routine check up by now. Seriously, don’t worry about me.

Jaune:If you say can do it alone then I guess you can. But if you change your mind-

Summer:Trust me, after all I’ll be in the best hands possible.

Jaune:*looks at Weiss*

Weiss:She’s not wrong, but I don’t have to tell you that.

Jaune:Okay, call us when your done and text your brother that you’re going.

Summer:Consider it done. Let’s go auntie. *walks off*

Weiss:*frowning*

Ruby:Nuh uh, there will be none of that. Smile as Jaune is about to spoil you with every dessert imaginable while I’ll continue to be the number one aunt. Don’t tell Saph I said that. *leaving*

Jaune:I will!

Ruby:Uuuuugggggghhhhh!

Weiss:Sigh

Jaune:It’ll be alright. *holding her close* I mean she’s strong like her mother.

Weiss:Pretty sure it has more to do with her father’s resolve.

Jaune:As much as I would love to argue which one of us is better, let’s go eat instead.

Weiss:Another plan bad the brilliant tactician. I’ll grab my purse.

xxx

The ride to the base wasn’t long. Before long, Summer was giving Ruby one final hug before stepping through the gates and waving to any guard that greeted her. The mechanical hallways might as well be a second home to her. Oil and hot metal slowly come to her mind as the smell hits her nose from the the bottom vents. The constant clicking of the programs working diligently upstairs. Soldiers drinking their usual blend in the break room not too far from the restrooms near the right wing. At this point Summer could walk through this blind and still know where every water fountain is.

Down in the left wing was her destination; the laboratories where the finest minds can be found hard at work. Unfortunately they always seem to find the time to notice when she’s in front of their work space. Each set of eyes fixed on her in fear, interest, anger, or twisted curiosity; all but one professor and a doctor with a room closed off from the others for the upmost care. Summer quickly made her way through the door and was pleased to see her favorite doctor tinkering away in their soiled lab coat. The whiteish room littered with science equipment and highly advanced pods against th back wall. A door to right is currently closed.

Summer:Hi Dr. Polendina.

Penny:Gasp! Salutations little Schnee!!!! *hugging her* what a pleasant surprise indeed!

Summer:Crushing.....wheeze you’re crushing!!!!

Penny:Oh! *lets go* I’m sorry, you think I would be used to that by now.

Summer:You think I would be prepared to dodge by now. How have you been?

Penny:I’ve been swell. Recently I’ve been working on a some secret things for the military.

Summer:Does that explain the spot and higher temperature in this room? Making a bomb or something?

Penny:I’m not at liberty to say but I will tell you I’m running out of fire dust. So what brings you back to my home away from home; check up time already? *analyzing her*

Summer:Unfortunately.

Penny:Well let’s see if we can learn something new today. *locks door* I’ll get my tape recorded and everything set up while you get ready.

Summer nodded and started to undress until she was in a sports bra and compression shorts. Completely unladylike to most high class citizens of Atlas but she isn’t like average people. She couldn’t help but glance at a pod to see her reflection. Her face always bunched up at seeing all the puncture scars she has. Bellow her right rib, small ones on her thighs, a faded one on her left shoulder while she a couple more on her right arm, the soles of her feet and graze scar near her heart. At least her face was mostly untouched besides the slight scratch on her jaw line.

Thankfully most of these have faded dramatically due to age but she couldn’t help but wrap her arms around herself. Embarrassed to look at all her imperfections. Those thoughts quickly fled when Penny touched her shoulder smiling.

Penny:Beautiful as ever I see.

Summer:*smiling* Thank you.

Penny:As usual I’m putting these wires on you to check your vitals then you’re going into the second pod from the right.

Summer:Is there any reason you never put me in the first pod? *stepping into number two*

Penny:Sentimental value; I got made in it more or less. *looking at scroll* Your vitals are pretty normal. Well, except your temperature for obvious reasons. You know 93 degrees Fahrenheit means you should be experiencing hypothermia right?

Summer:So I’ve heard. Nature’s rules sort of doesn’t care about me.

Penny:We’ll see about that. I’m going to release a little bit of the dust know okay? Just remember to take calming breaths and relax. Also.....waffles.

Summer:What?

Penny:It’ll make sense soon. *pushes button*

The pod is sealed shut and a glowing white dust is dispersed inside. A bit of anxiety creeps it’s way through her body but Summer follows the direction to the letter and closes her eyes. It’s a waiting game for Penny as her patient slowly zones out. No better time to start recording the long she supposes.

Penny:Okay so this is entry log 72 I believe. Once again I’m running test on Summer Schnee to help with her...affliction. Eleven years ago the girl’s mother found the existence of an ice dust deposit far more pure and refined than anyone thought possible; currently known as diamond Dust. Studies over the years have granted less information than we desired but far from useless.

*looking through notes*

Penny:Cell preservation, cold fusion, absolute zero, suspended animation; all things that have greatly benefited from this discovery and even the promotion of healing has accrued in the subject. At age five Summer Schnee was caught in an Diamond Dust explosion due to its volatile natural. Several large pieces of the dust as well as a few shards were lodged into their body and the subject was blasted into a frozen lake. An event like this should lead to almost instant death yet she remains alive and relatively healthy.

Summer*:drifting off*

Penny:Blood samples have shown traces of the unique ice dust still flowing through her veins; could all this all be possible through the immediately use of her brother’s semblance to try and diminish the dust in her? Is it the cause other side of my patient? Medical research has found numerous draw backs for it though aren’t atypical for excessive dust exposure expect one. It appears diamond dust might have some sort of affect on the psyche. Multiple patients have come back after treatments explaining how their head felt cloudy or even slightly depressed; all symptoms faded in a few days.

Summer:Zzzzzzz

Penny:Is.....I think subject fell asleep? Strange, it doesn’t take much diamond dust to activate Shiva and the pod temperature is-

75 degrees Fahrenheit

Penny:Whoops! Let’s drop that down to around 40.

Summer:*hair turning white*

Penny:That’ll do it. *messing with recorder* Near death, hypothermia, lack of oxygen due to near drowning, blood loss; all things that can very well lead to brain damage or a mental health problem by themselves, yet no loss in any motor functions or brain activity I can see. With the addition of the dust maybe she’s just-

Thump!

Her train of thought was immediately broken. Green eyes met icy blue through the thick pod door. The sound of thumping kept happening rhythmically as her patient gently put her head against the glass repeatedly in boredom. The wires on her ripped off and on the floor.

Penny:Salutations! Ready for your check up?*smiles*

Shiva:Sigh, not this nonsense again..... Salutations my cybernetic warden.

Penny:This is a lab, not a jail. Also I’m a doctor and a scientist.

Shiva:You are a very cute and very expensive toaster oven with a conscience. Open.The.Door.

Penny:*writing* Patient B is still more aggressive and unfriendly unlike patient A.

Shiva:Are you even listening to me!? Also why am I B when I’m better than Summer!?

Summer:(can you say something that isn’t insulting to anyone?)

Shiva:Make me, if not then shut up and be quiet. The grown ups are talking.

Summer:.......

Penny:Shiva, do you by any chance know the breakfast item I said a several minutes ago?

Shiva:When was breakfast mentioned? You’ve been rambling to yourself since you messed with thermostat.

Penny:(Interesting.......)

She started pacing the room and examining Shiva. Her veins and scars glowed a faint blue in time with her breath. The way she was focused and more examining her surroundings showed some neat changes from Summer. Every movement she made was almost child like; constantly swaying and visibly annoyed at the locked door She breathed on the glass leaving frost. Soon after she started to smirk as she ran her nails down it. Letting her out would be a bad idea; her presence itself was reeking of danger. Penny was curious but far from stupid; not to mention a powerhouse. It’s one of the main reasons she is lead doctor and scientist to learn more about person called Shiva.

Shiva:You should really open the door. I would hate to break it down like last time.

Penny:This door is far stronger than the last one.

Shiva:You sound so confident.

Penny:Mrs.Xiao Long couldn’t make a dent with a maxed out punch. Even if you did get out nothing would happen. It’s way hotter out here than it is in there.

Shiva:God I’m gonna love the day all this preparation goes to shit. I’ll admit you’re charming but I hope you know I’ll most likely have to scrap you the day I eventually snuff out Atlas’s precious little snowflake once in for all. Gotta tie up loose ends. That includes your hus-

Penny:I would very much appreciate it if we kept things civil between us. Threatening each other won’t make this process shorter in the long run. *grabbing thermostat knob* So please refrain from talking about Professor Pine.

Shiva:Awww looks like I hit a nerve if that’s even possible with you. Listen, why would I ever make your life easier when you’re trying to do the impossible? I’m here to stay; Summer has no one to blame but herself for that. Maybe if she wasn’t so weak and useless then I wouldn’t have had to save her sorry ass from the lake.

Penny:Summer as told me you’ve mentioned this before. Shiva, what exactly are you?

Shiva:Isn’t that obvious yet?

Penny:???

Shiva:I’m me of course, someone that everyone should be wary of hehehe. Or who knows what might happen!?

The lab itself slowly got a chill as Shiva started laughing to herself. Her eyes and hair started to glow a bit brighter while the inside of the pod started to freeze. Penny gasped as the temperature inside was starting to drop. Immediately she raised it back to 75 which stopped the chill in its track. Shiva knelt down and started to feel weak.

Shiva:Hmph, what happened to my checkup? Too scared to continue?

Penny:The pod was recording everything I needed, including vitals and brain activity. The wires you took off was just for show.

Shiva:Well isn’t someone just prepared for everything? Let’s hope being a widow is one of them.

Penny:Sigh goodbye Shiva.

Shiva:I prefer, see you later.....

Eyes close and hair goes back to pale blonde; even her veins stop glowing. Soon Penny is greeted with cobalt blue eyes and a very ashamed look. Penny opens the door and is spooked for Summer to fall right into her arms.

Summer:I’m sorry she said those things.

Penny:I’ve heard and felt worse. So you were listening the whole time? Can she hear me now.

Summer:No, too hot and tired. Speaking of tired....can I lay down for a second?

Penny:Of course, take a break then you’ll continue the rest with my hus- *giggles* the Professor; I’ll never get used to that.

Summer:Think you learned anything useful?

Penny:Hopefully, I have a bunch of theories.

Summer:Good, that’s a relief......zzzzzzzz

Penny:*smiles* Out like a light.*clicks recorded* note to self, be wary of temperatures in varying locations. *looks at pod*

*slightly cracked glass*

Penny:Failure to do so could be.....fatal.

Part 2

[flying-elliska]

I’m still not over it, so here’s a drabble about what happens after…well, after. (not really expl*cit, more like *metaphorical* lol)

VENDREDI 19 : 24

The world is an explosion of colors.

And it’s theirs, all theirs. Shock and need and giddy pleasure mixing and thrown all around them in a joyful mess, marking the world wherever they touch.

The moment he felt the cold brush of paint touch his nose, something let loose in Lucas, and now he’s got Eliott pressed up against the wall, looking at him like he’s a work of art. It’s intoxicating. Every second is a frantic rush and yet Eliott’s eyes seem to hold eternity.

Neither of them hesitated before chucking off their clothes, Eliott only stopping  to grab two condoms in his pocket and it hits Lucas he came prepared and he thinks the nerve and also thank god because he really, really would not have thought about it in his current state of mind. He just needs them to be closer, closer, closer.

…

The first thing he does when they let go of each other and sink down to the ground is laugh.

He cannot believe what they just did. Eliott looks at him, mischievous, so loving it would completely overwhelm his heart if it hadn’t just tripled in size, and they laugh together.

As he lets the endorphine high course through his body, awareness of how sticky and slippery everything is starts to break through the haze. Also, he’s got paint in his mouth. Ugh. He spits on the floor.

Eliott makes a smacking noise with his lips.

“Hm, I’ve tasted worse, as far as paint goes. I mean, it probably doesn’t bode well for the longevity of our masterpiece, but you chose well.”

“Oh yeah, that’s totally what I had in mind when we picked these. Which ones are going to look and taste the best on my boyfriend’s butt.”

Eliott raises his eyebrows, and his smile is the brightest thing in the room flooded by the evening sunlight.

Lucas realizes what he just said.

“I mean…”

Eliott grabs one of their shirts off the floor and leans towards Lucas, using the spotless inner side of it to tenderly wipe off the worst of the paint of Lucas��� face .

“Good call, boyfriend.”

Lucas feels like the happiness is going to lift him off the ground, and he can’t help but draw Eliott to him and kiss him, and mix their colors together all over again.

…

Eventually, they manage to get dressed. They’re an absolute mess, there’s no avoiding it. Lucas’ whole shirt is half-orange, and then there’s the paint under his clothes, which is starting to dry and flake. Eliott looks like he crawled through mud on an alien planet, his cheeks muddy brown and hair shot through with electric blue. It’s going to be absolute hell trying to explain this to anybody. Especially as they turn towards the wall, and well.

It’s pretty damn obvious what happened there. Their ‘masterpiece’ doesn’t even begin to cover the old design, except in the center. Where it definitely looks like two people throwing themselves at a wall covered in paint while naked. Is that a butt print ? Lucas is going to absolutely die if anyone sees this. Well, he would definitely get a few high fives from at least Emma and Basile, but it isn’t worth it.

Eliott sees him having a crisis and grabs one of the largest brushes, dips it in a rest of red paint on the ground, and starts swiping it haphazardly over the worst of the offending marks.

“It’s like an explosion started here.” He wiggles his eyebrows. “It’s a metaphor, see ? Deviating a bit from the abstract theme, sorry, but I think we’ve thrown all the liquids we can at this poor wall.”

They didn’t even…well this style of painting is…anyway. Forget orange, Lucas is turning bright red. But he loves this. He loves how wild and carefree being around Eliott makes him. Like they could repaint the whole world in their own colors.

…

They manage to make it to the bathroom and clean off their faces and hands. But there’s no two ways about it - the fresque is probably uglier than before, and the room is a mess. They might have to come back early on Monday to clean it. He’s got no cell in his body inclined to do it now. Before he leaves, though, he snaps a picture of the paint-covered floor, empty paint buckets and two very visible, ah, remains of their activities. He’s in a bragging mood.

They walk out of the school, thankfully avoiding meeting anyone. There’s no way they’re going to get into public transport looking like this, so they walk the rest of the way home - to Lucas’ appartment, the closest to school.

Eliott’s hand keeps brushing against Lucas’s.

He wants to grab it. He really wants to. He isn’t there yet.

But he feels like he might be, soon.

As he walks, he posts the painting picture on his insta. He has been avoiding it for a while and he didn’t check his notifications when he posted the picture with the boys earlier, but he sees he has a new follower who has tagged him in a picture. The lettersoup name makes it sound like a bot, but hey, you never know.

The picture is Jackson Pollock, and the caption is a row of rainbow hearts. He looks up at Eliott.

“Aha, you found me !”

“You tagged me, that’s not very subtle, dude. Is your whole profile full of pretentious artsy references ?”

“I don’t know, why don’t you tell me ?”  

Lucas is readying a smart-ass comment but when he actually clicks on srodulv’s page, his heart kind of stops, and so does he, right there in the middle of the sidewalk.

The drawing of rain drops, dated. February 16. The night of their first kiss. “Not afraid.”Quotes in English about stars. The piano, god. That video of Eliott listening to rock in the exact same manner Lucas had put dubstep in his ears for days.

Some of the drawings are pretty dark. He’s starting to understand that Eliott’s a bit of a troubled soul, and maybe it explains a little bit of the rollercoaster they’ve been on. He’s messed up recently, he can understand. All he really wants to know is that Eliott really cares. And - from this ? Well, he really really does.

The f*cking chocolate bar - the very first day they met. Chelou, their first inside joke.

Fuck being timid and fuck shame. Before he knows what he’s doing, he’s kissing his man in the middle of the street, right in view of the whole world.

And then he follows him back on insta, of course.

…

When they arrive to the appartment, the first thing Lucas does is knock on Manon’s door.

“Hey, I need the room.”

Manon’s smile is the biggest he’s ever seen in someone who’s basically just been s*xiled.

“Of course, but wash up first okay ? You’d better not leave any weird stains. Hello, Eliott, nice to see you.”

Eliott greets her back, and Lucas is suddenly afraid she’s going to give him the shovel talk, so he pushes them both to the bathroom.

…

It takes them a long time to get clean, both because paint is difficult to wash off and because they can’t seem to keep their hands off each other. And well, it’s a small shower.

Eliott is so beautiful, and Lucas can’t get over being able to see and touch all of him, wherever he wants. As the pigment washes off with the water, he leaves new marks, more permanent, deep pink blossoming under his teeth and lips.

He wants the whole world to know. Eliott said he was the only one that mattered.

When they’re done, the shower stall looks like they murdered a clown in there. But they’ll have time to be fussy tomorrow.

…

They dry off and burrow under the covers together, skin against skin, cosy and clean and the closest thing to a holy experience Lucas’ ever known.  

It feels like a whole age since they were last here, like this. He feels like a whole different person. It’s been gruelling, but it was the kind of change he needed, to love Eliott wholly. There’s nothing holding him back now.

There’s still a shiver of fear. That he will go to sleep and Eliott won’t be there tomorrow, that he will find another sad drawing about how they can only be together in parallel universes.

But he has learned to step away from fear. And as Eliott whispers sweet nothings in the crook of his neck, as they move against each other again and again and the pleasure builds like waves of warmth breaking together, the reality of it sinks deeper and deeper.

This here is real, and it’s his life, right here and now.

[lovemesomesurveys]

when’s the last time you ate a pickle? It’s been a few years since I’ve actually eaten one, but I like to have one on the side sometimes with my sandwich cause I like to squeeze out the juice and dip my sandwich in it. It’s quite delicious. what’s that you’re listening to? An ASMR video. was the last thing you drank a coke or pepsi product? Nope. how many times is your cartilage pierced in your ears? I only have my earlobes pierced.  what are your pets names? Princess Leia.

do you need to take a smoke break right now? I don’t smoke. have you ever had a pet bird? Nope. honestly, do you think that you’re going to be an overprotective parent? I don’t plan on being a parent at all. what was the last kind of chips you ate? Probably Doritos. It’s been awhile. tell me the birthdates of everyone in your top friends. would you rather have ice cream, freeze pops, or popsicles in the summer? I like freeze pops, or Otter Pops as I call ‘em. It’s been a few years since I’ve had those or any ice cream, though. what kind of relationship do you have with the last person you kissed? We’re not on bad terms or anything, but we’re not friends either. We drifted apart. We do have each other on Facebook and Instagram, though. I’ll “like” some of the things he posts sometimes and he’ll like some of the things I post sometimes, but that’s the extent of it now. have you ever told a stranger that their barn door was open? No. what color are your toenails right now? They’re not.  when was the last time you clipped your nails? I pick/clip at my nails and the skin around them quite often. Like, a few times throughout the day. I don’t know what’s left to pick/clip at, but I do it a lot. :/ does your mouse have a wheel to scroll with? I have a track pad that’s built into the laptop. what is your biggest accomplishment in life? Blah. click on a myspace bulletin and scroll to the main bottom - what’s it say? what is one thing that you really wish you could understand, but don’t? Myself, really. I don’t know why I can’t get it together. Why I put off certain things. Why I don’t take care of myself very well. The list goes on.  what were your grades on the last report card you recieved? I got all As my last semester. what temperature do you like to keep your room at? I don’t know the temp, but I like to keep it cool. I’ve had 3 fans going all summer and even now as well because it’s still warm here. It’s starting to cool down and it feels nice at night and in the morning, but it’s still warm during the day. Still need my fans all day and we’re getting into mid October. Sigh. what’s your favorite department in lowes? I don’t go to Lowes often. Actually, last December was the first time in I don’t even know how long.  what is the brightest object you can see by just looking around the room? My lamp is bright. have you ever been tutored or tutored someone yourself? I’ve been tutored.  would you rather wear necklaces, bracelets, rings, or earrings? Bracelets. pretty, bright, fake jewelry or boring, plain, real jewelry? I used to be really into accessories and I’d wear a lot of stuff from Claire’s and Hot Topic. I liked to matching my accessories with my outfits. It was cute, but inexpensive stuff so I was able to get a lot of it. Of course, real jewelry is beautiful and I like that as well. I have some plain piece and some with stones. I don’t wear jewelry anymore for some reason, though. Well, except for recently when I started wearing beaded bracelets. I don’t know why I stopped. where did you recieve your last receipt from? Walmart. what was the last thing you said outloud (singing doesn’t count)? “It’s warm in here.” is everything you have on actually yours? Yes. when was the last time you wore a band-aid and why? A few weeks ago cause I got a cut on one of my fingers. do you like ketchup or mustard better with your corn dogs? I mix them together. do you ever just randomly drive around when you’re upset about something? I don’t drive. you look at the clock and it’s 4:44 PM, what do you do? Uh, nothing? What’s significant about that time? a trip to california, the bahamas, new york, wisconsin, utah, or canada? I’d love to visit the Bahamas, New York, and Canada.  what would you do if you discovered that you had a 7 year old kid? Well that’s impossible, so. I’m pretty sure I would know if I did, though. moon sand or play doh? Playdoh.  what was the last act of creativity you displayed? I made a few beaded bracelets recently. I don’t think that’s all that creative; though, but *shrug* do you like the way your hair looks right now? Ugh, no. do you ever find yourself just writing/typing out your feelings? That’s exactly what I do in these surveys. if so, does that make you feel better? It’s nice to have a place I can just ramble and vent. who’s house were you at last, besides your own? My aunt’s. any big plans for this summer? Summer is overrrrrrr. :D are you missing school yet? I don’t miss it. play guitar, drums, keytar, xbox, sims, sing, or take a dance class? Play The Sims, ha. what’s your favorite department in wal-mart? Apart from the food, I like looking at the decorations during Halloween and Christmastime. I used to like looking in the makeup department a lot, but I don’t wear makeup much anymore. have/would you ever run track? No. do you honestly believe that someone will waste their time reading this? Some people like reading other people’s survey answers. I do.  do you like your teeth? No. the last male that you texted just confessed his undying love for you do you still speak to him? Uh, that’s my younger brother... are you in a hurry to grow up? I was never in a hurry to grow up. I wasn’t the kid who couldn’t wait to be an adult. Even at 30 I’m still not ready, but time keeps going whether you’re ready or not. who was the last person you were in a vehicle with other than family? I haven’t been in a car with anyone other than my family in years. does piano music tend to calm you down? I don’t use that as a way to calm down, but I suppose it probably would help at least a little. It is nice to listen to. do a 180, then turn back around and tell me what you saw. Nah. do you actually pay attention to the lyrics in a song before you add it? Sometimes, but usually it’s just if I like how it sounds. Then I’ll listen to it closer.  how many people can you think of that you know named christopher? One. how far away are the people you miss most? 3 of them passed away. I don’t know where the other is. what’s something you need to get done soon? I’ve been needing to do a lot of things for a long time. what is the most repulsing smell you can ever recalling catching a whiff of? Public restrooms can smell pretty rank sometimes. :X your best friend tells you they’re moving. believe it or think it’s a joke? Uh, I’d sure hope my mom would be joking if she said that. I’d be like, “So, we’re moving?” who’s pool did you last swim in? It was a friend’s boyfriend’s pool. is your best friend awake right now? Yes. are any of your friends or family members out of town right now? Not anyone in my immediate family. I don’t know where every single person in my extended family is, I have a large family. your grandparents just died in a plane crash, what are you doing? I’d be devastated to say the least. what website did you last visit (and no, myspace doesn’t count on this one) Well that’s good cause it wasn’t Myspace. Haven’t been there in over 10 years. Anyway, apart from this one it was Google.  if i came to your house, could i find any kind of chocolate? There’s brownies. There may be chocolate ice cream bars, too. do your parents allow smoking in your house? Nope.  does everyone in your top friends really deserve to be in that place? what size bed do you have? Full. would you rather frolic through a field of daisies, sunflowers, or daffodils? “Tiptoe through the tulips...” lol. do you remember the last time that you colored a picture and what did you draw? I don’t draw, but I like color. I last colored something earlier this year. last person you left a voicemail for? I don’t like voicemails. what is the last thing you charged? My phone. who was the last person to upload a picture with you in it? My aunt. have you ever held a snake? Nooooooooooo. what did you last use tape for? I don’t remember.  what was your score last time you bowled? I don’t remember. The last time I went bowling was several years ago. do you remember your cubby hole number from kindergarten? No. Actually, I’m not completely sure they even had numbers... I feel like they had our names. Awwww that made me so nostalgic and kinda sad. I miss those days. :( do you like peas? No. is your current status update and mood accurate on what you’re doing? I haven’t posted a status on Facebook in a long time. describe to me the nearest stuffed animal to you. There’s 3 on my bed: a small dog squishmallow, which is a super soft and squishy stuffed animal, a big giraffe squishmallow, and a regular giraffe stuffed animal.  what is the last cd that you listened to in a vehicle? I don’t remember, it’s been years. do you ever wear sleep masks when you sleep or shower caps when you shower? No. I kinda want to get a cooling eye mask, though. what would you like to drink right now? I’m good with my Starbucks Doubleshot. zebrah print, cheetah print, cow print, polka dots, or stripes? Polka dots or stripes. could you tell me exactly what pets everyone in your tops friends have? when is the last time you ate pudding or yogurt? Several years ago, not a big fan of either one. do you like raisins? Yeah. do you tend to drink lemonade often? Nope. It’s been years since I’ve had lemonade.  would you rather go to a beach, and amusement park, or a water park? Beach or Disneyland/World if I got to pick the amusement park.

[davidsenzi]

Summary: Continuation of 3x07. The boys are hanging out Friday night and Matteo texts David. Matteo misses David. David misses Matteo. Matteo and David need to talk and feel comfortable enough to be honest with each other. They just need to talk it out.

“So, uh, how’s it going with you and Kiki? I know you had to cancel plans with her for ping pong,” Matteo asks, making conversation. Carlos nonchalantly shrugs with a smug smile on his face. “Good, it’s going good…”

Matteo stares off into the distance, unable to stop himself from thinking about...well, everything.

He felt so many mixed emotions. For the most part relieved and content. He had listened to what Jonas had to say and agreed that being sober had its perks. He felt more himself and was starting to become more accepting of who he really was.

He accepted that he was gay. He accepted that he would have consequences for blowing off Sara. He accepted that he had a crush on someone. And he accepted that this crush could quite literally crush him. He accepted that he didn’t want to be closeted anymore. And he accepted with that, that he would not hide his boyfriend because he was not ashamed.

David.

However, he did not currently have a boyfriend. He had gone on a date with David and accepted when he didn’t feel comfortable kissing publicly, immediately offering to chill at his house with privacy. He even accepted David texting him later and telling him he needed time. Because Matteo understood needing time. Hell, it took him until his senior year to start accepting himself.

And when he got a text that said ‘I’m not into you, please leave me alone,’ Matteo, brokenhearted, accepted that it was possible David did not like him back. Well, no, he didn’t exactly accept that.

He accepted that David needed time to himself and in a time of panic, had texted him that. Because if he were following the rules of accepting everything, if he were to accept David not liking him, why shouldn’t he accept that last Friday and Saturday were a mistake?

So really, on top of feeling relieved and content with everything that was going on...he missed David. A lot. Like, he really fucking missed David. In fact, earlier today, he had un-crumbled David’s drawing and put it back on his wall...in hopes that in another uni -

“Matteo?” Jonas quietly asks, pulling away from the boy’s conversation. “Yah?” Matteo asks, looking to him. “What’s up? Anything resolved with uh David yet?” Matteo swallows while shoving a hand in his pocket, only to reveal a folded piece of paper.

Unravelling it, Matteo knows what it is. Another drawing from David. Except, he’s in it this time. “From David?” Jonas guesses and Matteo nods while studying every part of it. It’s David looking to Matteo...longingly, with a speech bubble that says, “I miss you.” And behind the drawing of the two is very faint writing. It’s a reference to Only Lovers Left Alive.

“When you separate an entwined particle, and move both parts away from the other, even at opposite ends of the universe, if you alter or affect one, the other will be identically altered or affected.”

“I miss you,” Matteo reads out loud, words barely leaving his mouth. Carlos slowly stops speaking when he realizes what Matteo’s saying, “I mean it’s been a while…what are you guys talking about?” Abdi turns his attention to Matteo and Jonas too.

Matteo exhales loudly before shrugging, “I don’t know.” Carlos tilts his head forward so he can see whatever it was that Matteo was holding. “Can I?” He asks, and hesitantly, Matteo agrees handing it over.

“He misses you,” Carlos says, looking to Matteo. “He said he wasn’t in to me.” Jonas scoffs, “Bullshit, you know he is.” Carlos agrees with Jonas, handing Matteo back the piece of paper, “Yeah dude, why else would you mysteriously leave drawings for someone to find that literally say ‘I miss you,’ because I don’t know about you, but it sounds convincing.”

Matteo gives a sad smile, happy that the boys are dedicated to supporting him. “You should text him,” Abdi suggests and all the boys start to nod. Matteo shakes his head, “No, I don’t think so.” Carlos argues, “But he at least misses you, meaning he wants to be around you again. Why don’t you just straight up ask him why he’s sending you mixed signals?”

Matteo does not offer a reaction, he already rejected their idea nicely. “Why not?” Jonas prompts. Matteo sits up straight, remembering what him and Hans had talked about. “Well, for starters I talked to Hans and he said David probably needed space.” Abdi questions, “But how do you know?”

“Well I think what he said makes sense. Hans thinks he’s probably not out yet and there are two things I could do...wait or move on. And when I talked about breaking up with Sara and liking guys, that’s when he started to distance himself.”

Carlos sighs, “Bro, I don’t know exactly what happened, but...I still think you should text him.” They look to Matteo to see if he appears any more enthusiastic about the messaging. He isn’t. Jonas’ eyes widen, as he gets an idea.

“Okay, then...don’t text him by making an ultimatum, that I admit was a bad idea. Tell him your choice.” Matteo chuckles, David sure seemed to be dictating everyone’s lives now. They were all in the David trance. “What choice?” Jonas smiles, “Uh duh, that you’re waiting for him and understand he needs time.”

“The literal last message from him is him telling me to stay away,” Matteo fights. Jonas slings an arm around Matteo’s shoulder, saying, “And if he really meant it, this wouldn’t be the second drawing you’ve received. You are texting him because it’s not like you weren’t thinking of him anyways.”

Sighing, Matteo opens his phone. Maybe Jonas was right. Maybe, just maybe, Jonas was wrong. As Matteo opens WhatsApp, his hand begins to shake. Jonas was wrong. Jonas was, most definitely, wrong. The last time he saw this text, he shattered his phone.

His fingers dance around his screen, not sure what to even type. “Just say something like ‘Hey, I just wanted to let you know that if you wanna talk, I’m here’ or maybe you wanna say that you’ll be friends? Or that you will wait?” Matteo groans.

He begins to type. And erase. And type. And erase. And after an unnecessary amount of time passes, Matteo is able to construct a text before nervously dropping his phone onto the couch.

Matteo: I miss you too. If you ever need someone to talk to, I’ll wait.

He hopes it doesn’t sound to clingy, but he tried to be as genuine as possible. He returned the ‘I miss you.’ He offered to be just friends if that’s what David wanted. And, he mentioned that he’s more than willing to be patient because he gets what needing time means. He really hopes it sounds okay.

For about a minute, the crew remains silent, kind of all sharing the same anxiousness. Finally Matteo lets out a sigh, before hopelessly saying, “He’s not going to respond.” Although he tries to sound dejected, he can’t stop his heart from pounding so fast that he thinks everyone can hear it.

Jonas pats him on the shoulder while encouraging him that David would reply. If David cared, now would be the best fucking time to show it. Though, Matteo hates that he wants David to reply because he did request space. Damn it.

That didn’t stop his hands from frantically grabbing his phone, less than a second after it rang. It was a message. From David. He got a message from David.

David: Where are you, right now?

“Oh my god, what do I say? What do I say?” Matteo asks, needing a good response to he can quickly reply. Jonas throws a hand up in the air, suggesting, “Say you’re at home, chilling or something.”

Matteo: At flatshare.

He didn’t say anything else. That wasn’t weird, right? Like what if he were to say he was chilling and then somehow David figured out he had friends over or just decided Matteo was passive aggressively trying to tell him to leave him alone?

“Ugh, he’s not responding,” Matteo complains watching no bubbles pop up on his screen. He waits for a good thirty seconds before turning off his phone in defeat. No one speaks for a little bit, almost bummed out.

It’s been eight minutes and Matteo cannot seem to concentrate on whatever conversation Jonas, Carlos, and Abdi were having. Eight minutes without a single reply. Why did David text him in the first place if he wasn’t gon-

A buzzer goes off. Someone was buzzing to get in. Matteo groaned as he stood up, “Probably Hans forgetting his keys like every other day thi-” He stops, mid-speech when he sees the figure of no other than David outside.

“Well, who is it?” Matteo repeats himself, absentmindedly, “Oh my god.” Standing up, Jonas asks again, “Who?” Turning to all three he scrambles to think of - well - anything. “It’s David.” Carlos shrugs, “Oh cool do we get to -”

Matteo interrupts him and Jonas has already read Matteo’s face. He’s trying to get a confused Carlos and Abdi to move...and fast. “Get out,” Matteo orders, quietly, not even sure if he sounds convincing. “Out, out!” He says as he shoos the boys away. “But -” Abdi tries to argue before Jonas grabs him and drags him to the foyer.

“Out, before he sees all of you!” Matteo says, pushing them out of the flat while Abdi and Carlos pout. Jonas is without a doubt Matteo’s favorite and wingman right now. He greatly appreciates that. With Jonas forgetting his beer, Abdi nearly tripping on the shoe mat, and Carlos not able to find his shoe, Matteo closes his door on them.

He starts to pace around his small foyer for a good twenty seconds, praying the boys weren’t complete idiots and ran into David. His breathing hitches when he hears a knock on his door. He inhales and exhales loudly while running a hand through his hair, before messing it up.

His eyes are downcast and he tries to not look completely out of breath, from the boys, as he casually opens the door. But, for fucks sake, he needed to see David with his own eyes. It had been a full two weeks since the last time he had seen him. When he looked up, the first thing he noticed was how nervous David looked...so unlike his usual disposition.

Matteo just stares at him, like he had when they met. “I lied to you in the second text I sent you. I only meant what I said in the first one,” David speaks up, fidgeting with his right hand.

Matteo swallows. Fuck. “Why’d you send it?” He decides on saying. And just like David had been preparing for this moment, he began to explain himself. “I’m transgender. I didn’t think...you would like me, the same, if you knew...since you’re still new to even accepting your sexuality. And because you’re...gay, I thought you’d think of me as less of a man.”

Matteo remains silent, sucking on his lower lip. That was a lot more than he was expecting to take in. Although he didn’t think it was going to be a fuck off, that wasn’t one of the endless possibilities he had imagined. He just looks to David, dumbstruck.

He wants to be honest with David. “I don’t know if...I’m even ready for everything, yet. I liked where we were. It was beautiful…” And Matteo sees the pain in David’s eyes too. He knew David didn’t just lightly say those things. These past fourteen days had been complete hell for him too.

This time, David doesn’t reply. But based on the way David’s looking at him, Matteo’s able to decipher that he agrees with him. “...Can we make it beautiful again?” Matteo quietly asks. He had spoken so quietly that it was almost inaudible if David hadn’t been listening to Matteo with all the strength he had. And it’s sweet. It’s like Matteo thinks David could really reject him to his face.

And though David’s eyebrows were still knit together with concern, he lets out a sigh of relief and smiles. He nods and goes to embrace Matteo. Matteo wraps his arms around David securely, not wanting to ever let go or even think about letting go. David pulls his arms around Matteo’s neck so he can rest his head in the crook between his neck and shoulders.

They want to feel each others’ presence. Like really feel it. To the point where they were so aware of their presence that it was engraved in the back of their thoughts forever.

And after the longest hug Matteo thinks he’s ever had, he feels the air come between them when David moves back and asks if they can go to his room. Matteo agrees and shuts the front door, before walking to his room with David.

He knows the air is thick when he leans against the back of his door and watches David go to sit on his bed. There were so many unspoken words that need to be said. Matteo knows what he wants to say first. “So you’re trans?” He asks. David nods to him, looking at him with a gaze so intense Matteo thought if he closed his eyes, he could still feel it.

“That must have been really hard for you,” Matteo notes. David agrees with a small hum. Swallowing, Matteo admits, “This is...a lot to process, but I know you understand. Like when he chilled Friday night, I wasn’t ready. You weren’t ready. We don’t have to be ready for that. I want us to both feel comfortable before…” David nodded, biting his lower lip.

“I think that if we both want this then that’s just what we need right now,” Matteo concludes, but looks to David to see if he disagrees with anything. “I’m just sorry about how I pushed you away, Matteo,” David apologizes again, guilt written all over his face.

Matteo starts to walk over towards his bed, and sits across from David. “I needed to hear it, even if it wasn’t true. I needed to be independent and learn to accept myself. And when you...you helped me get closer to being happy again. My depression was just...exhausting,” Matteo thinks out loud.

David swallows, nodding. Matteo looks down to David’s hands. David’s beautiful hands. They both reach out to intertwine their hands as Matteo goes to lay down, David doing the same in the dark room. The only light in there was his desk light and it offered enough.

With David’s other hand, he wraps it around Matteo, cradling him. Matteo understood. Matteo always understood. Matteo was understanding because he’s had similar experiences. Matteo leans in towards David before the two swiftly fall asleep in each other’s arms. They were exhausted. But, now they could be exhausted together.