#ActuallyAutistic

[autisticvelo]

”autistic people don’t do [ extremely common higher support need , higher level autistic trait / symptom ] , that just stereotype”

you need include us too : you need include childish autistic person , you need include nonverbal autistic person , you need include autistic person who drool , you need include autistic people with intellectual disability , you need include autistic person with loud messy public meltdowns .

can not hide behind “it just stereotype” because that not true . there are many people very disabled by autism , you need remember us and include us .

[tech-obssessed-shark]

As a fellow autistic person, thissssss.

A lot of the things I dislike are because I can’t control them.

Choosing a big friend group to hangout with >>> Being in large crowds

Going to a concert>>> Being at a restaurant with unpredictable loud music

Blasting headphone sounds>>> Construction noises outside

"How can you hate loud noises yet have your headphones on a high volume?"

Because I can control the volume of my headphones and choose what I want to listen to, but I cannot control the volume of external noises nor choose to just turn them off

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

dear autistics who

white

low support needs

not need 24/7 support

can work independently

can pay taxes

language privileged

intellectual & cognitive privileged

who can fit in societal definition of useful & productive (yes, even if hard)

when fight back against eugenics & ableism, you NEED to fight alongside, fight with, n fight for autistics who

radicalized & POC

from places of world where there critically lack autism knowledge n support

visibly autistic

higher support needs

need 24/7 care

can’t work independently or even work at all

can’t pay taxes

nonverbal, nonspeaking, minimally verbal, without functional communication, or cannot communicate via language at all even AAC

w intellectual disability or cognitive disabilities

who cannot fit into society definition of useful n productive, no matter how hard we try

because we always are & always will be primary target.

because we most vulnerable most marginalized within our, OUR community, which you belong in.

because once they finish us off you won’t be spared.

[emirrart]

29,12,2024

allan's tone

[imoved-starbitsun]

something i never see anyone talk about is how lonely autism can be. not because we don’t fit in or whatever, but because our love languages are so fundamentally different from the rest of the world.

i won’t always hear it when someone tells me they love me. i won’t always understand it when someone shares a kindness with me. sometimes it hurts to be touched. sometimes i interpret genuine care as mocking or insincere because i’ve been burnt so often, and i have no way of knowing otherwise.

when i spend time in my room engaging in interests i enjoy, but i leave the door open to let my friends come in and out and interrupt as they please, that’s love. when i send someone a long ramble about something i care about, that’s love. when i let someone hug me, that’s love. when i try a food even though it’s not a safe food, because my friend made it and is very proud of it, that’s love. when i take the time to tell you when i need space and that i’ll come back when im able, that’s love.

i don’t think people hear me when i tell them i love them. i don’t know if i can hear others when they say it either. i feel very alone most of the time, like there’s a glass barrier between me and the rest of the world. i can see them mouthing, i love you, i love you, but how can i believe them? they’re nowhere near me. no warmth and no life in it.

[pseudoquack]

Any time I struggled with something my parents didn't think I should be struggling with, they decided I was doing it deliberately to spite them. My whole childhood I was told how selfish I was being when I spoke up about finding something hard or wasn't able to do something they wanted from me. My dad used to judge if I was telling the truth about something by making me look him in the eye and if I reacted wrong I must have been lying. I always reacted wrong. I find eye contact deeply uncomfortable. So any time he suspected me of lying I became a liar to him automatically, and he never questioned the fact that this test always gave the same result presumably because it confirmed what he already thought to be true.

All this to say that I think people form narratives in their heads of what 'normal' children should be like. I was normal to them in enough ways that they expected it of me in all ways, and I could never live up to that. But they had decided I was a normal kid so it must have been on purpose that I was only able to eat a small number of things, didn't want to hug them, reacted strongly to things they thought inconsequential, et cetera. They preferred to believe I was bad than consider I might not have been 'normal'.

The thing about growing up with undiagnosed autism is that you’re a bad kid. And you don’t know how to stop being a bad kid. But you’re pedantic, you hate hugs, you’d rather be alone than attend a family gathering, you play by yourself instead of with friends or family, you make mealtime impossible, you can’t even look your parents in the face, you lie to get out of going to school and when you’re there you complete your assignments correctly but in a way that is somehow inherently wrong. You’re wrong. There is something wrong with you and you can’t identify it or fix it. You can’t begin to explain it. You pull for justifications and apologies. You were a bad kid and there was nothing you could do to be better.

[defectivegembrain]

No I don't think that posts about the larger societal issue of shaving expectations are about personal choices or specifically targeting people with sensory issues around it, but I also don't believe you that there are somehow millions of people bringing that up whenever someone talks about shaving as a societal expectation. I think there are maybe a few sometimes and you're exaggerating to pick on these people because it seems outlandish to you. You're not exactly making up a guy to get mad at, but instead making up clones of the guy you're mad at to justify the extent of your anger. And yeah I think it's quite interesting how many people seem to use "sensory issues" as a go-to for "thing people are making up to excuse thing I disagree with". And I remember the times people have responded to my own sensory issues as if they were impossible or alien, and well. I think some of you just love having any excuse to feel like that kind of treatment is justified.

[aw-tysm]

I'm gonna say it... I don't like the "levelling up" jokes about autism.

I don't understand how they're even meant to be funny. And when you know how the levels work anyways, you know that level 2 and level 3 are requiring substantial and very substaintial support.

It just feels like saying "hey, yeah, I want to be more disabled than I am".

Would it be funny if we start making "levelling down" jokes? Is this okay to do?

"Oh, haha, managed to mask today and trick someone into thinking I'm relatively normal for 5 minutes. Guess I lost some autism exp". Or, "how many allistics do I need to fight to lose a level in my autism?".

[pigeon-cave]

Spectrum of overwhelm, now in triangle form due to popular demand

[Image description: A triangle chart titled, ‘Spectrum of Overwhelm.’ The three points are ‘404 Error,’ showing a person with an empty thought bubble; ‘wet beast,’ showing a person sweating and sobbing; and ‘rage beast’ showing a person clenching their fists in an outline of orange fire. The peak is the ‘404 error’ vertex, and the inside of the triangle here is coloured beige and labelled, ‘shutdown.’ The lower half is labelled ‘meltdown’ and is red on the rage beast side and blue on the wet beast side. \End description]

[theconcealedweapon]

Things that society considers autism an excuse for

Nazi salutes

sexual assault

Things that society considers autism not an excuse for and things that people think children who do should be met with violence

using the wrong tone

showing too much or too little emotion

asking questions and having an authority figure take it as "arguing"

[autisticnightfury]

my twenties so far have just been spent unlearning deeply internalised ableism and letting myself embrace the fact that i am, actually for real, not faking it, higher needs than i've been conditioned to think i have, disabled.

i'm not "just like the rest of your family and need to rest and recharge more than others," i'm disabled. my autistic traits aren't quirky things that run in the family and make us unique, i'm disabled. i'm not easily exhausted and struggle with exercise due to asthma and joint pain and unstable joints just like the rest of the family, i'm disabled. i'm not a special smart child who has been blessed by god to save others and that process of saving others means i HAVE to suffer, i'm disabled. my suffering isn't noble or admirable or necessary to succeed, i'm just suffering. i wasn't put on earth to uplift others, i was born with differences that make my life harder. i'm not selfish or lazy or ego-driven, i'm disabled and trying to take care of myself.

when i struggle, i'm not doing anything wrong. when i rest, i'm not doing anything wrong. when i ask for help, i'm not doing anything wrong. when i cry, i'm not doing anything wrong. when i draw back, i'm not doing anything wrong.

i did nothing wrong and yet i was given guilt the size of the world to hold on my frail shoulders since i was a child.

growing up autistic means i grew up abused for being disabled.

[autistic-efu]

Some NT jackass: *armchair diagnoses a nasty, evil MAGA type despite not knowing them personally/having any psychiatric expertise, furthering ableism in the process* Me: No. No. You do not get to pin this on the neurodivergent community. That bastard is neurotypical until otherwise confirmed (by a real medical professional).

And you get to sit with that and wonder why so many evil NT people exist. And maybe...learn and grow as a result. Work to change the culture that produces so many evil NT folks.

[claudiatieno]

Not mine, credit to @audhdwithzoe on tiktok!

[defectivegembrain]

It's unfortunate how often the solution to a problem is just talking to people. You'd think it could be something easier like making a comprehensive chart or list, or reading everything you can find on the subject, but no, so often you can do all that and you still have to talk to people.

[aw-tysm]

Being inclusive to autistics as an autistic is recognising and accepting that we all have conflicting wants or needs.

You may hate bright lights but another autistic may love them.

You may hate being in crowds but another autistic might love that.

You may hate tags on your shirt but another autistic may actually like having tags on their shirt.

You may love bland foods but another autistic may love rich or extreme flavours.

You may love infodumping to people but it may be too overwhelming for another autistic.

A spectrum includes all ends of extremes. And all of it deserves to be accepted and accommodated for.