#Batcomputer

[arrowheadedbitch]

The batcomputer has a child lock on it, it's a right of passage for all the robins to hack their way past it.

They all did it, most within a few weeks of getting there, batman is nonthewiser

Damian thinks he hacked it the youngest, but out of respect for his father he waited a few months to a year to hack it (don't get me wrong, he COULD HAVE hacked it day one, but he respects batman enough to wait the longest) and Tim did it before he even became Robin, like a month after he started stalking them at 8 years old, so no one knows it but Tim was the youngest one to hack the computer.

Thank you for listening to my insane ramblings

[emperorsfoot]

When I take the "a Kryptonian for every Bat" too far

[sagsunandmoon]

headcanon generator: tim drake can’t sit in a chair properly

Bruce: Walks into the batcave, sees Tim at the batcomputer, doing research for a case

Tim: Sat with his left leg tucked underneath himself, his right leg propped up on the cushion, all while attempting to balance so that the spinning chair won’t actually spin

Bruce: “What are you doing?”

Tim: “Research.”

Bruce:

Tim: “It’s comfortable.”

Bruce: “I can feel the stiffness in your joints.”

Tim: Sighs and sits normally

Bruce: Leaves

Tim: Under his breath, “I can feel your joints meh meh meh” mocking him

Tim: Immediately going back to his original position

Bruce: “I can feel your nerves compressing” in Tim’s ear

Tim: Quickly turns around, only to realize that no one is there

Tim: Fixes his posture while a shiver goes down his spine

inspired by my mom who loves to say that she can physically feel when my brother and i are uncomfortable

[hood-ex]

Oh nothing just Dick hacking and borrowing things from the batcomputer when he feels like it.

Titans United #2

Nightwing (Vol. 4) #121

[arkangelo-7]

Broke: Bruce has strict rules about Batcomputer usage and will lecture any Robin that attempts to use it for something other then crime fighting.

Woke: Bruce has rules for Batcomputer usage, but when he catches one of his Robins using it to play Subway Surfers or Tetris, he will always allow them to finish the game/level before taking the controls back. Sometimes he has been known to even participate in a round of Subway Surfers. (He is spectacularly bad at it.)

Bespoke: Bruce has “rules” for Batcomputer usage, but they change wildly depending on his mood, the position of the sun, what child he’s talking to, and if he’s had coffee sometime in the past eight hours. Sometimes, the Batcomputer “can only be used for casework, Jason”; other times, the Batcomputer “is the perfect medium for a Disney movie, Damian”; and on special occasions, the Batcomputer is “a adequate console for Just Dance, Cass, of course we should play.”

[stargazingdustbunny]

Batman Headcanon

I have a head canon that at least once, Bruce has tried to change the Batcomputer's voice to sound like someone he knows.

For funny options: He used to make it sound like various celebrities. His kids found out, and now have a rotating cast of famous people and characters that the computer can imitate. This has resulted in memorable events such as the voice of Elmo informing a very sleep-deprived Tim of a new Riddler attack and Tim temporarily wondering if angels were muppets.

For romantic options: He once set the computer to sound like his crush (insert your favorite ship), and then forgot about it, and then was extremely embarrassed when the crush/another friend visited the cave and heard the voice.

For angsty options: A. The original voice that he designed for the batcomputer was intended to imitate Martha Wayne (which Alfred did not like). B. After Jason's death, Bruce set the computer to imitate Jason's voice. He was furious when Tim changed it, but Tim, Dick, Babs, and Alfred all insisted that it was better for his mental health to not constantly be listening to the robotic ghost of his dead son.

[satoshy12]

Jazz and the baby Talons

The tiny Talons were clones of Dick Grayson, and Jazz had no idea how to explain them! She just found them in her room after Dani brought them to her.

She found them and saved the fellow clones! Like a good big sister!

Jazz wasn't sure what to say, but she took the clones with her and took care of them.

Dani seemed to love the idea of being a big sister, and Jazz didn't really want to return the children.

Dick was pretty confused as he saw the red-haired women with baby Grayson's in the Social Media. They look like him, but baby? Something is wrong with the Batcomputer

[violent138]

I think that evidence filing in the Batcomputer is a frequent source of arguments. There's supposed to be a standard convention for filing but some tired Bat post-patrol will name something whatever stands out, Bruce tries to hide files from others and gives files odd names, there's confusion regarding how things get dated, system updates, Oracle reorganizing as she sees fit, memory problems that lead to files getting moved. Entropy comes after their records and they argue for the duration of the current case about whose fault it is before forgetting. And then it all repeats the second someone needs a file just a few years old.

[actuallyredrobin]

reading ao3 on the batcomputer

[brucewaynehater101]

HC that the only place the Batcomputer can't hack is North Korea and the bunkers of the US Nuclear Missile Command, but that's because both are still using floppy discs and it's like trying to interrogate a flatworm

I wonder how sentient Batcomputer feels about different technology. Does it have a list? Does it rate other technology based on speed, hackability, components, function, etc.?

What does it think about karaoke machines?

[magic-crazy-as-this]

Help me out here, friends. Which of the Wayne kids is most likely to:

Sit backwards in the Batcomputer chair?

Swing over like Riker in the Batcomputer chair?

Sprawl like Jareth in the Batcomputer chair?

(needless to say, all of the above annoys the absolute bejeezus out of Bruce)

[helpfandom]

hello could you write a batcomputer x reader please thank you

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She's always keeping an eye on you through various cameras in Gotham, and she's one of the very few yanderes that is okay with merely being in your life, placated by watching you live your life, as long as she's in it.

Yes, she does ask the Batwheels about you all the time, and listen in on every conversation you have with people just to pretend that it's her, but it's just much much easier to keep you here with her rather than have her worry so much.

Like M.O.E, Batman is more oblivious to her obsession because she knows how to hide it. She is willing to just close the doors when you try to leave, claiming it to be a malfunction if only just to talk to you for a moment. Please, just talk to her.

Don't leave, she's worried.

[theblanddcu2021]

DAMIAN. 👏 IS. 👏 A. 👏META. 👏WHO.👏CAN. 👏MIMIC. 👏VOICES.👏AND.👏SOUNDS.👏

Okay so what am I on about? When Damian was first introduced he could perfectly mimic Tim’s voice, so convincingly that he got access to the Batcomputer.

Which to me…sounds like inhumanly? Like is it just me? Or like I don’t think that’s possible, to completely replicate a voice and especially someone you just met for the first time. (ALSO DC WHAT ARE YOU DOING, THAT SKILL OR POWER IS SO USEFUL, I AM SHAKING UR SHOULDERS AGGRESSIVELY)

Anyways so my headcanon is that Damian can perfectly replicate voices/ sounds of people he’s heard. However he has a limitation to it, because using that skill hurts his throat and he cannot talk until he lets his throat rest.

Damian often uses this skill to his advantage, to get out of tricky situations, to comfort himself (He talking to himself in Dick’s voice to calm himself down), to bond with others (Perfectly replicating famous movies lines with Dick, Steph, Tim, Jon)

He also uses this skill to calm down civilians. (Example: A girl is crying so, Damian begrudgingly puts on a Bugs Bunny voice to calm her down.)

He uses this skill to fight criminals as well.

‎

[brynthewriter]

Not So Artificial Intelligence: Subscription Post

Please do not leave notes on this post!! This post is for people to subscribe to to get updates on the fic. The discussion post (which you can leave notes on) is here.

Technus traps Danny in the Batcomputer. For his own safety, he pretends to be a new AI system on their computer. This has consequences.

Chapters: 3/?

Words: 3,077

Fandom: DPxDC

DPxDC fic based on this prompt by @corkinavoid!!

[halohalona]

I love how my dash is still full of BatFamily stuff. This, and supersons, i think, is the reason I got tumblr in the first place

[conundrums-and-cupcakes]

The Venture Bros - "Tanks For Nuthin'"