#DC Posting

[9-liv3ss]

Here's the first chapter of my fic!

Nine Lives. (1292 words) by v0ided Chapters: 1/? Fandom: DCU, DCU (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Batman: Wayne Family Adventures (Webcomic) Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne Characters: Bruce Wayne, Helena Wayne, Selina Kyle, Damian Wayne, Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Barbara Gordon, Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy, Alfred Pennyworth Additional Tags: Batfamily (DCU), Batfamily Dynamics (DCU), Married Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne, Selina and Bruce are IN LOVE, Helena Bertinelli is Huntress, Damian Wayne is a Little Shit, Damian Wayne Needs a Hug, Bruce Wayne Loves Selina Kyle, i wrote this in one sitting, somebody send help Summary: Helena Kyle-Wayne, the 16-year-old daughter of Bruce Wayne and Selina Kyle. With Selina missing, Bruce and Helena grow distant. Lost, Helena leaves the manor searching for answers in the city her father married first.

[hlreesespeanutbuttercups]

The price of not being tidy

That is a terrible, horrible, incredibly foolish idea. Let’s do it and see what happens (Prompt)

Pairing: Stephanie Brown x f!reader

Synopsis: Journalist reader and the Bats try to come up with a plan for breaking into warehouse storage unit (currently hired by a kids party bc this is Gotham and People Do Not Care).

Word count: 2.6k

Warnings: none

A/N: I literally just wrote this and put it straight on here so if there are any mistakes please let me know!

border is by @enchanthings-a !

“What if you guys just dressed up as like, Disney characters or something?”

Silence.

“Or like, parents with a kid? If there’s a kid’s party happening then like… I mean, it seems a good idea?”

Your voice trails off. Four pairs of terrifyingly blank white lenses stare you down as you do your best not to shift awkwardly under the heat of their gazes. You’ve not felt this self-conscious of yourself since high school, which is ridiculous. It’s not even a bad idea and you know it. So why are they still staring at you like you’ve suggested they burn down a convent?? You’re pretty sure you can even feel the pensive stare of Oracle from half a city away.

“Yeah…That’s… yeah ah I don’t know…”

“Not happening.”

“Well…”

“Yeah you know I don’t think that…”

“It’s on parr with the kind of ideas Drake comes up with.”

“Bitch?”

You don’t even know why you’re there to be honest. You’re a journalist, and a respected one at that. Realistically there had been no reason for you to share your intel, especially not when you knew the bats had their own stakes and objectives in this, stakes and objectives that could easily cost you your story. You could have been in and out, a quick undercover operation that was all too familiar to you.

There had been one glaring problem; also known as your girlfriend. As soon as you’d promised her to let her in on any cases involving gang activity you could feel yourself regretting your decision, and now here you were. God you should have just lied, why didn’t you lie??

Earlier that day you’d been battling your blender (unsuccessfully), so wrapped up in trying to disembowel the damn thing without getting your hand blended that you’d barely even noticed the presence of your lovely girlfriend. Steph had emerged at the vocal sounds of your distress, her head poking through the doorway of your shared bedroom as she blearily took in the scene. Sensing no immediate threat (thankfully for you, because she was in no state to be much use against an attacker) she’d begun to cross over to where you were nearly in tears from frustration. The chaotic mess on the table had stopped her in her tracks. 

Finally, at long last the stupid thing whirred into life as you sagged in relief into the counter before turning around to grab the fruit from the fridge. You were frozen however, by the sight of Steph rifling through the papers you knew should have cleared away, goddamnit. 

In that mess of shipping records and witness testimonies was the definitive proof that something absolutely no one wanted in Gotham had recently been shipped to a warehouse in the west dock. It didn’t take a genius (which your girlfriend was) or anything less than a five second scan of these papers (which she’d done) that this was the work of a gang hoping for more control. The gang you’d been researching for the past week. Without Steph knowing. The sigh had left you before you could stop it.

It hadn’t led to the blazing argument you’d been fearing, but that didn’t mean that she wasn’t pissed as hell at you. And whilst she was letting you and all your elderly neighbours know exactly how pissed she was, you’d stayed silent. She was right to be annoyed but in your defence you knew exactly how delicate this was- one wrong move would alert every member of this gang and they’d disappear (their new weapon with them), but probably not before putting a bullet in your head. 

This was not talk Steph understood; she was a vigilante, and as such had her own priorities, her own patrols. She wouldn’t be there every second of the day to babysit you until your enemies either gave up or forgot about you, but of course this was a hard pill for her to swallow. You couldn’t hold it against her, but you also had to be realistic.

Half an hour later saw you finally cave, deciding to simply give up all your research. Technically she’d have forced her way into it regardless but that wasn’t the point. The point was you were being cooperative. Your head had been leant back against the back of the couch in defeat, but what she said next had your head whip up to look her in the eyes with so much force something strained in your neck.

“What.”

“You know you’re not the only person who’s been interested in them recently, right? Tim’s had his eye on this gang for about a month now”, Steph continued on like you weren’t seeing your stealth operation go up in flames in real time, “You know he’s going to insist on coming along. Plus Dick is home from Bludhaven, and Damian has only just been cleared for action again. There’s literally no way he’s sitting this one out.”

“You’re not serious. Steph this has to be undercover, they’ll see you all coming from a mile away but if I go in alone-“

“Absolutely not, and also, I’m sorry but you do remember we are like, actual vigilantes right? Like, we are literally known for stealth more than anyone else. Ever.”

Her voice had taken on an incredulous tone, and see you get it, but like also you know them. There is literally no way your story is making it, god you’re so fucked. Your boss is going to kill you, you are so getting fired-

“Listen” her voice was softer now. Clearly your horror at the situation hadn’t gone unnoticed as Steph came over to sit next to you on the couch. She took your hands in hers, and you faintly registered the scent of your favourite body lotion radiating off her (god, she was such a thief, you knew she’d been stealing it), “I can’t see you get hurt, and at least this way I can feel certain you won’t. I’ll even help you convince them not to go in guns blazing, just… can you trust me?”

Steph’s eyes were always expressive; crinkled up in laughter, sharp with focus, hard with anger. Right now her gaze was unwavering, deep blue eyes searching for confirmation that you did, that you trusted her, that you would follow her into a burning building if she asked you to because you would. 

“I… Steph you know I can. I do, I just,” you sigh ,”I just wish there was a way I could guarantee this will go well. And the more people you add to the mix the more variables there are that I can’t control.”

You both sink back against the sofa, letting your legs entertwine and her head fall softly onto your shoulder. It’s as close to an apology as either of you will get. She doesn’t answer. She knows there’s no real rebuttal to that, knows better than anyone that trying to put limits on her family is futile. You sigh, and you let a smile ghost over your lips as she does the same seconds later. Tonight is going to suck.

All of that has led you to this, standing to one side as a game of ’no you’re worse’ escalates with every sentence. This is probably the most worked up you’ve ever seen Red Robin get, you think to yourself idly. You’ve never really spent much time with him in fairness. While he seems like a likeable guy, you’ve yet to get over the awkwardness of dating his ex, not to mention how busy he always seems to be. Truly he doesn’t seem to have an off button, so this typical sibling bickering is almost humanising for you. 

“My plan to get us into Nanda Parbat was perfectly viable! You’re the one who nearly caused it to fall apart all because you couldn’t act the part-“

“That is such bullshit, me acting as your prisoner would never have worked, you just wanted en excuse to hold me at knifepoint-“

Throughout all this, Spoiler was stood next to you, uncharacteristically silent. You were just about to nudge her to check in but before you could she finally spoke up.

“What if… I mean what if we actually did? Like, just go undercover as guests.”

Silence once again. This time not directed at you, which is nice. Steph continues undeterred.

“Just think about, it’ll be more of a hassle to go undercover but if we do it right, we can figure out the layout ahead of time and scope out any guards. It’s not ideal but this way I get a happy girlfriend with a story for her boss, and we probably won’t get shot at. I know Alfred at least would prefer he didn’t have to stitch us up again so soon after the last incident.”

You have to stifle a snort at that. Bringing in Alfred is a low blow, but an effective one. And the others do seem to be considering it. At the very least the bickering has paused while all parties involved mull it over.

“We’d have to figure out the guest list. Find out who we can pose as…” Dick trails off before his head snaps over to Damian who immediately bristles.

“No.”

“You know the kid, he’s in your year, no? You didn’t get an invite or anything like that?” He presses.

“I did. But I have no intention of going. Besides, I can be of more use with the weapon.”

Don’t make me be social, was what you could hear between the lines. He really was just a teenager, you noted with some amusement. It was so easy to forget sometimes.

“You’re our only real shot at getting in right now. Spoiler’s right- if we can do this without a fight then it’s worth a go. I can go in with Robin as his brother, but we need to get as many people in without it being suspicious.” With this, Dick tilted his head toward Steph almost like he was asking permission, “Red Robin can stay on the outside and run surveillance.”

At this she seemed to realise something, and Steph’s head twisted sharply to look at Nightwing properly. 

“What? Bro you are not stealing my girlfriend, why can’t I go in with the kid?”

Nightwing held a hand up in placation.

“Listen, I’m the only one officially associated with Damian Wayne. No one’s gonna question me if I show up with my girlfriend to chaperone him, but if you do…” 

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Agh fine, but you’d better keep it friendly, got it?” she levelled him with a threatening glare and wrapped a possessive hand around your waist, earning a light smack on the arm from you. Steph could be ridiculous sometimes, but both of you knew that there was no chance of Dick making you uncomfortable. Out of all the bats, he was (barring Barbara) the one you’d talked to most, and he was one of the most easy people to get along with you’d ever known. It was almost freaky how well Dick seemed to gel with just about any person he met. Hopefully it was skill that could come in handy tonight.

There was a brief pause as everyone took in the plan, but you noticed that one name had been left out in all this.

“So… if you, Robin and I are heading in, and red robin is outside running surveillance, where’s Spoiler gonna be?” You asked curiously.

As soon as the words were out of your mouth, a shit-eating grin started to make it’s way onto Dick’s face. You felt Steph stiffen behind you as she took in his expression and all the doom it spelled out for her. 

“All parties need entertainment. And I heard something about a magician making an appearance at this one.”

“Asshole. I can’t even do magic, what the hell am I meant to do? Pull a bunch of scarves out of a hat? I don’t even have a top hat you dick.” She hissed, “I can’t be anything else? A waiter? Literally anything else?”

“Oh I don’t know, I think I want to see you pull a rabbit out a hat”, you snicker, tracing little patterns on her arm as you turn your head just enough to give her an sly look over your shoulder, “I think it could be sexy, get you a Zatanna costume or something.”

You hear a few huffs of amusement, and you feel more than hear the scoff Steph lets out which vibrates on your back from where she’s still pressed up against you. 

“Please, if I’m pulling a Zatanna, I’ll get the real thing. I think I’d pull it off, don’t you?” Her voice is right next to your ear, a low tone that you find ridiculously attractive, actually. She knows it as well, the tease. 

A loud clap brings you both back to the present and you’re reminded that you two are very much not alone. And that your girlfriend’s ex is stood like two metres away. Dear god, if your cheeks hadn’t been flushed before from her teasing they were on fire now.

“It’s sorted then, Red is on surveillance. Robin, our lovely journalist and I will attend the party as guests, and Spoiler has exactly… three hours and twenty-six minutes to come up with something spectacular to dazzle Gotham’s elite.” 

You hadn’t pinned Dick as someone particularly vindictive, but based off the glee that seemed to radiate off him at Stephanie’s plight, you’d clearly misjudged. You suppose nothing brings out typical sibling energy quite like an undercover stealth mission. 

Steph clearly didn’t appreciate the countdown. Nightwing was narrowly able to dodge a canister of, did that say shark deterrent on it??, before Tim stirred next to him, his tone dry.

“This is honestly a terrible, awful, incredibly stupid idea. Let’s do it, I want to see what happens.”

“I too am eager to watch Spoiler make a fool of herself. I’m sure it will make up for having to pretend to enjoy myself.”

If Nightwing was taken aback by Damian agreeing with Tim (something you’d been told was about as rare as a blood moon) it didn’t show.

“Right then, we meet back here at six. The party will already be underway when we arrive, making it easier to go unnoticed. Red Robin should have no problem with that, but I’ll make sure to pass on the message to Robin. Make sure he doesn’t try sneaking in a carpet bomb or something.”

You visibly start at the new lack of vigilantes in front of you. When the hell had they even left? You’d put a bell on them if you thought it would actually do anything but somehow you got the idea any bell on them wouldn’t ring unless they wanted it to. Fucking vigilantes. Your mind finally finishes catching up and all your thoughts ground to a stop, too stuck on the words carpet bomb to come up with a response. Was that just a bad attempt at humour? Had that been a problem before?? 

“Well, I’ll be going too if there’s nothing else. It looks like I’m gonna have to break out something formal.” At this Dick pulled a face, eliciting a vague noise of disgust from Steph.

“You’re not the one who’ll be suffering tonight, dickhead.”

The grin that spread across Nightwing’s face at her name-calling made him look almost boyish. He gracefully bent to pick up the can that had been so lovingly lobbed at his head and lightly tossed it to you, before throwing you a teasing wink and turning to disappear out the window on silent feet.

For a second the only noise was the creaking of old floor boards and the faint wail of a police siren.

“So… any ideas for the magi-“

“Ughhhhhhhhhh.”

A/N: if you got this far i hope you enjoyed, again if anyone has any feedback it's all appreciated! I'll be uploading this to my AO3 as well under the same name!

[dc-posting]

Jason who is still hesitant to spend any of Bruce’s money until…

Bruce: Hey, what’s this charge on my card? $1000 for… Robux? Is that like cryptocurrency?

Jason: Uh. I wanted VIP in ‘Dress to Impress’ and then I realised I could customise my avatar and then I wanted to buy items in-game and-

Bruce: Oh, so it’s like a video game thing? And not crypto? That’s fine then.

Dick, a Runway Diva in DTI: You play fucking Roblox? Lame.

Jason: Yeah? You would too if you had any joy or whimsy in your heart.

Tim, has been spending hundreds on Roblox using Bruce’s card for months, knows Bruce knows what Roblox is: Oh, Roblox! I’ve heard of that, it’s like… minecraft but mini games, right?

Jason, eye twitching: Something like that.

Damian, has also spent hundreds of Bruce’s dollars on Robux recently: It sounds like a frivolous investment. But whatever makes you happy, Todd.

Duke: Wait… I am not using my free will and rich adults to my advantage. I’ve been doing free to play shit this whole time. Bruce, give me your card.

Bruce, bewildered but supportive: O-okay?

Steph, who has been using Tim’s money (which is Bruce’s money) for Robux: Hey, I also want your card. (She does not intend to buy Robux. God knows what she will purchase. I support her.)

[lallalanie]

"The hands that cradled my face and tilted it upwards to kiss my forehead are soaked in unfathomable quantities of blood."

"But they cradled me, yes?"

Full page under the cut

"Will you forgive me if I'm still mourning someone that's no longer dead?"

[augustusmuv]

fast doodles cuz I needed to draw my happy Lil baby boi 🤫

I need him to be a happy and silly child please 😭

I want to squish him 🤏🤏🤏

[bicatman]

i hate the "jason likes dogs" thing so much. i hated it when it was a headcanon, and i hated it more when it became canon.

dog bites/attacks happen more often in low income communities. dogs are more likely to attack children rather than adults. dogs are often used as guards for property and to keep out thieves. police canine units (nuff said).

jason lived in crime alley, he was a child who was homeless and squatting in an empty apartment building, and he was also stealing to get by (and hated cops.) ...but no correlation?? jason loves dogs???? what???

[based-bobcat]

Remember when Batman used to solve regular murders? Remember when Batman was fallible and could be beaten by a gunshot?

DC's writers don't.

I don't know if it's because writers only really write for trades more, but ever since new 52 every writer wants to be the O'Neil/Morrison and make it more epic than the last. I've lost count how many fucking times Gotham has been taken over and/or destroyed these last 5 years, but the fact that I lost count says something. There have been no civilian characters introduced since Tamaki's promising, but kind of mediocre, go at TEC.

They take his money away 'to go back to his roots' (laughable as Bruce has never been without his fortune), and sure you finally get him interacting with regular joes again, only for it not even mattering since he's gotten gear stashed everywhere anyway, not to mention that the next writer to throw it all into the garbage like a meal they don't like.

They reveal Batman's identity as if they're handing out pamphlets for a local political party; Including to Gordon, to Penguin, to Harvey Dent, to fucking Joker, but there is no consequence to that since Bruce's out-of-mask life isn't even a thing that exists anymore. When was the last time he interacted with someone who didn't end up clashing with/meeting with Batman? I sure as fuck can't remember it.

I had hope for Zdarsky's run, since his Daredevil run was a nice street-level romp. (At the beginning anyway, christ did he lose the plot in the end) but he writes stuff like;

That's just sad. Joker and Batman are not Gods or powerful beings like Clark or J'onn.

Th-they're just normal men.

And at the same time you have more and more influences that come from Wayne Family Adventures, which I like don't get me wrong, but these watered down fanficified versions of the Batfam is not what I want to read about when I open up a comic book. Just try reading Taylor's Nightwing without falling asleep and you'll get me.

I like these kinds of things as fan-art or fun covers, but not in my mainline comics.

The Batfamily used to be made up of people with the same goals, but with different approaches, ideals and moral boundaries. Which caused a lot of friction. (Barb and Bruce really, REALLY did not like each other during the early 2000s and that's putting it mildly. And they were co-parenting a suicidal gremlin at that time) They all respected each other, sure, but I can't see any of the family even slightly considering moving in with Bruce. Especially Dick, Barbara and Steph.

All this to say that I'm a boomer and miss the old days.

[transgwender616]

Can y'all do me a favor and watch the new Superman movie when it comes out. Zack Snyder fans are being really annoying about the movie and I need the movie to do well to spite them. Also the movie looks really good and is directed by James Gunn.

I have nothing against Zack Snyder and I don't think all of his fans are annoying. The non annoying Zack Snyder fans shouldn't be bothered by this movie doing well.

[muttsona]

you dont know true mischaracterization until you open the roy harper tag

[giveamadeuschohisownmovie]

Forgot to add this rule. If a character is vegan/vegetarian, assume they get tofu dogs.

[dc-posting]

do you guys think that the batkids ever try and sneak weed into the mansion and Ace the Bat-Hound alerts that he can smell drugs and Bruce is just:

Bruce: I’m not mad. I just want to know what it is and who has it.

…

Bruce: And also where you got it.

Tim: *looking at Steph*

Steph: *staring at Tim*

Dick: I for one am just distraught that my baby siblings are doing drugs.

Duke: *glaring accusingly at Dick* Dick offered me weed gummies my first night at the mansion.

Dick: *offended noises of denial*

Steph: *nodding* He always offers me weed when I visit him in Bludhaven too.

Tim: *owner of the weed that Ace is alerting at* Yeah, he’s real into drugs and stuff. Kept offering me gummies during family movie nights

Dick: Okay in my defence-

Bruce: *head in hands* What did I do to deserve this?

Alfred: *vividly remembers Bruce’s party drug phase of grief* What didn’t you do is the real question, Master Bruce.

[lallalanie]

Dream Realm! Damian Wayne and Jon El Kent.

Damian's costume is inspired by this design 👇

It's from Absolute Power: Super Son #1 for anyone who need the issue 🥰

[cannimochi]

Trick or treat owo :0

FOR U MY BUDDYYYY little tired post trick or treating :)

[bicatman]

(about... the batarang incident...)

"your honor it wasnt murder because some other guy totally wouldve been able to dodge it"

i can totally see this working as a murder and/or manslaughter defense. (but this post does become better if you read it in damians voice)

[augustusmuv]

Heyyy im not desd igg

I haven't posted for a long time, I know..

So yeah some very fast doodles that I MIGHT finish but ykkk I'm lazyass dummy

I love da rizzler

And I'm silly