#Especially find the right color without reference.

[tvntheatre]

OH MY GOD I CAN FINALLY FUCKING POST MY AXIS NONSENSE, LET IT BE KNOWN THAT I AM BIASED TOWARDS THE DISCARDED BOT!!!!!!!!!!!

If you think that the pink+yellow one is too bright and inaccurate, refer to the sixth picture in the post.

[sanasyndrome]

──“EXTRA SWEET, NO CREAM”

➤PAIR: roommate!kim chaewon x female!reader

➤SYPNOSIS: you didn't ask for a new roommate, especially not the campus sweetheart. but chaewon remembers you from a quiet coffee shop moment long ago. now you're roommates and she's determined to mean something to you too.

➤CONTAINS: fluff, reader is referred to as 'you' & 'y/n', reader dislikes chaewon at first, kms jokes, rushed ending

➤WC: 9.5k

I apologize for any typos and/or grammatical errors. happy pride month! :)

you weren't in university for the parties, the cliques or the constant social climbing. you didn't care about who was popular, who dated who, and who hosted parties every friday night with loud music and unnecessary decorations.

you didn't pay the hefty tuition just to waste your time engaging in all that nonsense, for crying out loud.

you were here to simply study, pass, and leave. quietly.

so it made sense that your contact list was nearly empty, just your family and a childhood friend. you wouldn't talk to someone unless they'd talk to you first, and even then, most conversations didn't go past a stiff ‘...thanks.’

your old roommate had been the same—she was quiet, rarely around, and respectful of your space. at times, it didn’t even feel like you had a roommate. then without any warning, she transferred to another university.

that had been fine too.

you figured it'd take some time for housing to find you a new roommate. but what you didn't expect was for them to toss someone in the next day. especially not one with three different colored suitcases, a blinding smile, and two cups of coffee. but here she was, already half way done with unpacking in your dorm.

you blinked.

she didn't disappear. 

and you didn't scream, but it was close.

standing there, a few feet away, she noticed you, and her face lit up like the morning sun breaking through a cloudy sky.

“hi, you're y/n, right?” she asked, her voice bright and melodic. she was genuinely hopeful, clearly worried she might’ve gotten your name wrong.

you knew exactly who she was, everyone did. kim chaewon, the campus sweetheart, the cheer captain, the business major everyone seemed to drool over. you've seen her around, once in the library, two times in the hallway, and too many times in the university's Instagram. she was sweet. the kind of sweet that would give you cavities if you let it sit for too long. people swarmed her like bees around honey; both guys and girls were constantly flirting with her, and you could see them practically begging for her friendship.

you didn't get the hype.

“I am.”

“nice to see you again!” she beamed, extending her hand to offer a cup of iced coffee “extra sweet, no cream, iced coffee. your usual.” 

‘again’?

‘your usual’? 

how in the world did she know that?

huh???

you tried to recount if you've spoken to her before, trying to trace back any moment where you might have actually spoken to her—but you were 99% sure that this was the first interaction between you two.

you scanned the cup in her hand, brow furrowing slightly. was it really your usual? it looked the way you liked it…

you hesitantly took it from her, “thanks…?” the words slipped from your lips, laced with a mix of hesitation and confusion.

she hummed in acknowledgement, her attention turning back to the tasks at hand, unpacking her belongings.

you stood there, staring at the cup of coffee.

‘is she some sort of stalker or something?’ you thought. how could she know your usual when you’ve never even spoken to her until now? 

you stepped around her and her suitcases which seemed to take up half of your room, before plopping down on your bed. 

your gaze flickered between the cold cup of iced coffee resting in your hands and chaewon, who was busy organizing her things with an ease that made it look so effortless.

you thought about drinking it. I mean, she wouldn't poison you, right? right?

after a moment’s hesitation, you raised the cup to your lips, the chilled surface cool against your skin. 

with a cautious sip, you braced yourself for something unusual. fortunately for you, it tasted just as you expected—no strange flavors. it was sweet, cold, and perfectly balanced. just how you liked it.

your gaze landed back on chaewon, watching her as she unpacked her things. she had a look of pure concentration on her face. as she dug through her bag, you noticed some colorful trinkets and carefully folded clothes spilling out. there were cute stickers, a couple of tiny plush toys, and a vibrant notebook covered in doodles.

it was in that moment you realized she had a lot more than clothes in there. she had too much stuff. way too much.

“is this a dorm or a lifestyle shoot?” you muttered under your breath, not really expecting her to hear you.

but of course, she did.

“let me know if you want me to take out the fairy lights,” she said with a playful wink.

you rolled your eyes.

you quietly sat on your desk, minding your business as you flipped through today’s lesson notes. your headphones snugly rested over your ears. in the coner, chaewon had long finished unpacking her things and was not scrolling through her phones, her thumb flicking up and down the screen aimlessly.

though the peaceful silence didn’t last long.

“hey, y/n?” chaewon called out, lifting her gaze from her phone. she waited for a response, maybe a small hum—but all she got was:

…

silence.

“heyyy,” she slightly raised her voice, wanting to catch your attention. but you remained focused on your notes.

just as she was about to give it another go and shout louder(not that she was annoyed or anything), it dawned on her that you were wearing headphones.

woops!

getting up from her bed, she padded over to you and gently tapped your shoulder. 

‘jeez, what does she want now?’ you huffed, pulling your headphones down around your neck but not bothering to turn around just yet.

she smiled, a bright, cheery expression that didn’t fit your mood at all “so… any dorm boundaries? like, lights off time or music stuff?” 

this was what she bothered you for? really?

despite your annoyance, you shrugged, trying to keep your tone light. “just don't bother me before coffee in the morning.”

“ohh, okay! gotchu.” she paused for a brief moment, her hands clasped in front of her. “by the way, can you turn the lights off before going to sleep? I prefer it that way.” 

“yeah, okay.”

“thanks!” she backed away, humming to herself as if she’d just accomplished a great feat.

after a while, you finally tore yourself away from your cluttered desk, the papers and books that seemed to mock your procrastination. chaewon was already cuddled up in her bed, the blanket pulled up to her chin. you tried to see if she was already asleep or just pretending, but it was hard to tell for sure.

still, you turned the lights off, just as she requested. you plopped down onto your bed, feeling the weight of tiredness pressing down on you.

“goodnight.” you heard chaewon say, her voice soft and quiet.

you didn't answer, your eyes already fluttering shut.

the next morning, you slid out of bed, groggy and still feeling the heaviness of sleep clinging to you, even after a whole night of rest. 

you stretched a little, and tried to go through your usual morning routine, but you still felt like a zombie. meanwhile your new roommate was out… somewhere.

as you brushed your teeth, your mind flickered to the coffee you'd order later. the thought of that cold, rich drink woke you up a bit. you really wished it would just magically appear in your hands every morning. like a caffeine fairy was in charge of your mornings. 

just as you were about to grab your things and head out of the dorm, the door swung open, and lo and behold it was chaewon with a smile lighting up her face and a cup of coffee in her hand. 

“...thanks?” you looked up. the door was already swinging shut behind her, no explanation, no good morning, just a cup of coffee.

you took a sip.

prefect. again.

which made it worse.

you sat on a wooden bench, your finger lazily scrolling through reddit, looking for something interesting to read before classes started. you were just about to lose yourself in a post about ‘butter vs cooking oil’ when a shadow fell over your screen.

you looked up, and of course…

chaewon.

“hi!” she greeted before dropping down to sit next to you like it was the most natural thing in the world. “thought I saw you over here.”

“uhuh.” you mumbled, trying to focus on your phone despite the energy radiating from her.

“I have a roommate radar, yknow?” she tapped her temple, playfully wiggling her eyebrows up and down.

“that's not a—” you began, but were quickly interrupted when someone called out.

“chaee! hey!” it was a girl from the cheerleading squad, one of chaewon's friends with a bright smile and a bounce in her step. “who's your friend?”

chaewon's face lit up even more, practically glowing with enthusiasm, while yours looked defeated with a hint of dread. 

“this is y/n—my new roommate. she's really cool!” chaewon declared, voice brimming with pride.

“nice to meet you!” the cheerleader chimed, shooting you a wide grin. all you could manage was a nod, feeling a bit overwhelmed.

the girl started bombarding you with compliments. something about your hair being nice, your eyes looking pretty, and a bunch of other things you didn't understand.

does she not have anything else to do or what?

just when you thought you might start to melt into the bench from embarrassment, fortunately, the girl’s boyfriend walked by and plucked her away, throwing you an apologetic glance as if he understood how perplexed you were.

you let out a sigh of relief as they disappeared into the crowd.

“hey,” chaewon started again, her voice calm but full of that same bubbly excitement.

if this was another compliment you were really gonna lose it.

she continued, “cats or dogs?” 

“...what?”

“cats or dogs?” 

how random…

“both.”

“fair enough.” she shrugged. you were about to ask why she cared so much about pet preferences when she suddenly stood up, dusting off her pants like she was ready for a whole new adventure.

“c'mon, let's get you to class.” in a swift motion, she wrapped her fingers around your wrist.

her grip was not tight, not loose, just right. just enough. enough to pull you off the bench and drag you along with her. a small giggle escaped her lips, and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at her enthusiasm.

gosh, she was annoying.

suddenly, she stopped in her tracks—pausing like she had forgotten something important. 

“uhh, what's your first class?” she asked with a sheepish smile.

“physics,” you replied.

you sat with your friend, minjeong, on the empty bleachers. it was lunchtime, and rarely anybody went there as most of them preferred the crowded dining hall or the grassy spots outside.

you and minjeong had been friends for so long that you couldn’t even remember a time when you hadn’t known her. you practically grew up together, childhood friends who made silly promises and swapped lunch items like it was the most important trade deal in the world. just like now.

“so, I heard you got a new roommate and a new friend. shocking, really.” minjeong said with a dramatic flair as she took a bite of your burger. 

friend? that's a bit of a reach.

“roommate, yes. friend? I don't know about that. where'd you even get that from?” 

“word gets around fast. especially if it involves chaewon. did you even know that she knows almost every single person in the campus? the girl’s so social it’s starting to scare me.”

“yeah, but I just don't get the hype. she's sweet, so what?” 

as you scanned minjeong's food, your gaze landed on something that instantly piqued your interest. “wait, is that a cookie?”

she quickly covered it with her hand, “nuh uh.” she shook her head, a playful grin stretching across her face.

“yuh uh! sharee.” you reached out, trying to snag the cookie, but minjeong was faster than you, stretching her arm high above her head, the cookie just out of reach.

“you're the worst,” you whined before letting out a small laugh.

minjeong laughed too, “I know right.” she finally relented and split the cookie in half, offering you one piece. “here, consider it a peace offering.”

you took the half she offered, holding it up like a trophy. “accepted.” you smiled, a genuine one.

later that night, you found yourself back at your desk, piles of homework stacked in front of you, accompanied by pens, crumpled papers, and textbooks. at the same time, chaewon lounged on her bed across the room, surrounded by her own collection of study materials.

she was staring down at her textbook with a furrowed brow, deep in thought. what the hell was ‘ignominious’ and who thought it’d be a good idea to put such a ridiculous word in her textbook?

she glanced up, looked at you, her textbook, then back to you before deciding you looked smart enough and had a few brain cells to spare.

after a moment of deliberation, she hopped off her bed and tiptoed over to your desk, tapping you lightly on the shoulder.

you pulled your headphones off. “what is it?” you asked.

with an air of seriousness that was oddly comical, she pointed at her textbook and said, “what does ig-no-mi-ni-ous mean?” she sounded it carefully, like she was trying to decode an ancient language.

your mind went blank.

…ignomiwhatnow?

you didn't even know that word existed! “honestly, I don’t know,” you admitted, scratching your head. “maybe just ask google or something?” 

“google and I are on a break. last time I asked a question I got diagnosed with three weird diseases and brain damage.” 

she's got a funny way with words.

“google it,” you shrugged, clearly unhelpful.

“fineee,” she groaned dramatically, turning on her heel and making her way back to her bed.

the entire night she kept bothering you.

“hey, do you understand this?”

“no”

“how do you think they did it without technology?”

“ask your grandparents.”

“do you—”

“nope.”

“how do you spell nauseous?”

“n-a-u-s-e-o-u-s.”

“wait, you lost me at the first ‘u’. can you repeat it?”

“no.”

“did you hear? one of the boys on the soccer team got kicked out and suspended because he got all violent with the coach.”

“that's… something.”

that night you stopped wearing headphones whenever she was around.

you woke up feeling completely drained, like you had just ran a marathon in your sleep. sitting up in your bed, you squinted over at chaewon’s side.

she wasn't there again.

‘what time does she even wake up?’ you wondered, half amused and half exasperated.

with a sigh, you swung your legs over the side of the bed and stretched, your muscles complaining a bit. as you glanced around your room, something caught your eye on your desk.

it was a cup of iced coffee with a small note.

you shuffled over and picked up the note, curious. the note read: 

“thanks for tolerating me last night! :D”

you let out an amused huff.

chaewon was supposed to be talking to her friends, laughing with them, but her mind was elsewhere.

“hellooo, earth to chaewon?” yunjin suddenly clapped her hands right next to chaewon’s ear, her voice exaggeratedly loud.

chaewon jumped in her seat, letting out a small yelp. “holy— what?” she exclaimed.

“you've been staring at an empty bench for like, five minutes,” kazuha pointed out, her tone teasing. “are you seeing something we aren't?”

sakura lightly smacked kazuha's arm, “don't bully her.”

chaewon sighed and looked away, “I'm just waiting for someone,” her gaze flickered back to that empty bench.

yunjin gasped dramatically and pressed her hand against her chest as if she had just heard the juiciest gossip. “woah, woah, woah… kim chaewon finally has a crush? I have to go tell eunchae!” she pulled her phone out of her pocket, ready to spill the beans.

chaewon quickly snatched the phone away from her..

“gosh, no! I'm just trying to get closer to someone. that's it!” she waved her hands, trying to brush off the assumptions.

yunjin shook her head in mock disappointment, giving chaewon a thumbs down before snatching her phone back, “boo, boring.” she teased, earning a glare from chaewon.

as her friends went back to bickering and making jokes, chaewon stayed quiet.

still waiting.

until you appeared.

with someone else. a girl chaewon instantly recognized.

minjeong—yeah, that was her name wasn’t it?

chaewon watched from a distance. there was something special about the way you interacted with the girl beside you. chaewon couldn’t help but feel a tinge of longing. she wished she could be that close to you.

she shot up from her seat, her feet carrying her over to you with a determined smile plastered on her face. “y/n! hi!” she called out.

you froze in place, caught off guard.

minjeong stood beside you, barely holding back a laugh as she leaned closer. “y/n,” she whispered. “you didn't tell me your bestie was going to drop in.”

“she's not—” you tried to protest but chaewon was already there, her arm wrapping around yours naturally as if it was meant to be. “hey, sorry if I interrupted.”

you grumbled, “you kind of did, yeah.”

minjeong gave you a slight nudge with her elbow as if to tell you to drop your attitude before she flashed a smile, “I'll give you two a moment.” and just like that, she vanished into the crowd, leaving you alone with chaewon.

“so,” you said stiffly, adjusting the bag that hung heavily on your shoulder. “what's up?” 

chaewon pulled her arm back and turned to face you fully, an easy grin on her face, “nothing much, just saw you and thought I'd say hi.”

“you didn't have to come over,” you replied, a hint of disbelief in your tone.

“yeah, sorry about that…” her smiled wavered for just a moment.

there was a beat of silence.

then a quiet: “I didn't know you had friends.”

you raised a brow. was she trying to make fun of you or something? should you be offended? “...what?”

chaewon's eyes went wide, instantly flustered. “no! wait, sorry, I didn't mean it like that! I just uh—” she laughed awkwardly. “you're just… kind of hard to read sometimes.”

“I get that a lot,” you muttered.

her smile returned, bright and genuine, “it's okay. I like reading.”

chaewon came back to the dorm with a visible limp. it wasn’t dramatic, not enough for most people to notice, but it was enough to catch your eye.

you didn't say anything right away, just glanced up from your desk, eyes flickering to chaewon's knee before looking back at your laptop, pretending to be absorbed in your work.

“you should get an ice pack.” you said flatly, not bothering to sugarcoat it.

chaewon froze, glancing at you like you had just spoken a foreign language. “what?” 

“your knee. it's swelling.” you didn’t even look up, still typing away as if her injury was just a minor technical issue.

“oh. it's fine it's just—”

“no.” you rolled your eyes dramatically, “you were limping yesterday too. you walked funny this morning and you kept touching your leg like it hurts. so do something about it.”

chaewon opened her mouth, clearly at a loss for words.

with an exasperated sigh, you stood up from your desk and made your way over to the minifridge, rummaging through it. a moment later, you returned with an ice pack wrapped in a clean kitchen towel.

you tossed it on chaewon's lap. “apply that to your knee and elevate your leg.” 

“...and rest. tell your coach.” you added. 

chaewon just blinked at the ice pack on her lap, her expression a mix of surprise and confusion. 

she watched as you went back to your desk like it meant nothing.

but it did.

it meant everything.

because no one else noticed. not her friends, her coach, not even the girls on her squad.

but you did.

you noticed the little things, the way she winced when she thought no one was looking, or how her smile seemed a bit forced.

and somehow, that made all the difference.

after chaewon's knee had gotten better, the first thing she did was stop leaving coffee on your desk like a forgetful barista. instead, she upgraded to a more personal delivery system. now, every morning, she'd waltz over to you with your usual drink in hand, looking far too pleased with herself.

you still had no clue how she managed to memorize your usual order. was she secretly a coffee psychic? you didn't dare question it. you'd just take the cup with a simple, 'thanks'.

oddly enough, she never launched into her usual non-stop chatter right away, which was a real shocker. she'd walk beside you and wait until you finished drinking. only then did chaewon start bombarding you with her ramblings or whatever random thought had popped into her head.

sometimes she'd linger by your side a little too long outside the dorm. next thing you knew, she was sitting with you during meals, walking you to class like you were some sort of vip needing escort. not that you minded it that much.

days turned into weeks. it didn't happen overnight, but you slowly grew used to chaewon being around. 

it was a massive change to your daily life. 

you used to solely spend your evenings buried in textbooks, headphones on, focused on squeezing every bit of knowledge into your brain. you were practically a hermit, and you liked it that way. but suddenly, chaewon, a chatterbox, somehow squeezed herself into your life without even knocking.

at first it drove you a little nuts. you'd be deep in concentration, only to be jolted out of it by her excited voice talking about a dream she had where she was chased by a giant marshmallow.

seriously, who dreams about that?

you tried shutting her down with dry responses, hoping she'd take the hint and back off.

but she didn't.

she just kept on talking. and strangely, you found yourself waiting for it—another story about a weird dream she had, the new gossip everyone was talking about, how much she misses and loves her dog. somewhere along the way it stopped being background noise and more of a routine. 

chaewon noticed.

she hadn't expected much when she started talking to you. she'd rant and you'd give her a shrug or just silence. at least that's what she usually got from people who didn't care enough to know her beyond the surface. but you? oh, you were different.

you'd listen, like actually listen.

this time wasn't any different. you sat by your desk, surrounded by scribbled notes and textbooks, reviewing and summarizing today's lesson while your favorite playlist played with music that somehow helped you concentrate. suddenly, you heard the distinct irritable sound of a chair scratching against the floor.

you turned to where the sound came from—beside you. you were ready to throw hands, but when you realized it was just chaewon scooching her chair next to yours, you relaxed. with a sigh, you turned down the music and tried to refocus your attention on your messy paper.

chaewon sat down beside you, legs crossed, clearly buzzing with excitement “you gotta really listen to what I'm about to say right now!” she exclaimed enthusiastically.

“that's the fifth time you've said that today," you pointed out.

“I knowww, but this time it's different! hear me out!”

you knew where this was headed. and just like that, your careful writing turned into mindless doodling. it always did when chaewon was around. that's why you started keeping an extra notebook at your desk every night.

“—and then, he had the audacity to call kkura ugly and tell everyone they dated! like, no y'all didn't. she even had to publicly post a tweet regarding it because people were starting to spam her dms with ‘aww, you guys looked good together, why did you break up?’” she ranted. 

“just because she rejected him? wow.”

“I know, right?” chaewon slumped down in her seat, then instantly perked up again, leaning over to peek at your paper.

“you got another pencil?” she asked, despite the obvious pencil holder filled with pencils and ballpoint pens in front of you. “I wanna draw with you.”

reluctantly, you stretched your arm out, reaching for a pencil. you gave her a random one, one with some sort of disney princess pattern. you didn't even know where you got that from.

chaewon examined the pencil, a teasing grin spreading across her face. “wow, didn't know you were into beauty and the beast.”

trying to suppress a smile, you shot her a glare. “I'm not into that.”

“yeah? why do you have this then?” she nudged, clearly enjoying this.

“I don’t know. it just... showed up!”

“gee, I wonder if you also like—”

“oh my— just start drawing.”

her teasing grin softened into a warm smile before her focus shifted to your notebook. she flipped through the pages until she found a blank one, then carefully tore it out. 

you gave her a confused look, “thought we were gonna draw together?”

she waved her hand dismissively. “later. I wanna draw something by myself first. no peeking.” she covered the paper with her free hand as she drew, blocking your view.

you just sat there, watching her, wondering what she was drawing. you noticed how she carefully moved the pencil across the paper, how her brows furrowed in concentration, and how the hair fell perfectly around her face. suddenly, you were struck by how cute her smile looked. was she always this pretty?

you tore your gaze away from her, internally panicking.

what in the world were you thinking? 

moments later, chaewon finally slid the paper over to your side. you looked down and saw a drawing of her talking next to you while you listened, your expression captured perfectly.

a smile crept onto your face. the actual drawing might have been a bit... well, questionable, but the idea was cute. "it's good," you complimented.

chaewon noticed your smile. it was genuine—warm. something about it made her stomach flip. she stared at you.

she knew you were pretty, but had you always been this pretty?

her grip on the pencil tightened as her heart raced, feeling a strange flutter she didn't quiet understand.

just the, you suddenly clapped your hands in front of her face, startling her. “did you even hear what I said?” 

“what? I mean— yeahhh, of course I did! you said… uhm.” 

yeah, no, she definitely didn't hear a thing.

“I said we should head to bed now. it's getting pretty late.” you reminded her, glancing at the clock.

chaewon looked at the clock, 11:32 pm. “oh, right. it is,” she yawned, suddenly feeling drained. “guess time flies when you're having fun.”

she stood up, stretching her arms over her head before shuffling to her side of the room then to her bed.

once she slid under her blanket, she peeked at you from the corner of her eyes. you were busy tidying up your notes, your eyes a little tired. you must’ve had a long day. she waited patiently for you to turn the lights off.

when the room fell into darkness, she muttered a soft, "goodnight."

she didn’t expect you to say anything back, maybe just a hum of acknowledgement, or a small nod. so imagine how her heart skipped a beat when you said, "goodnight," back.

she was done for.

it was friday night, and instead of staying up late and binge watching netflix shows—chaewon was infront of the mirror, carefully putting on some light make-up. she wasn't wearing anything fancy, just a jacket over a sweater and a pair of loose jeans. casual but undeniably presentable. you'd be lying if you said it didn't catch your attention. she looked good in anything.

you were sitting by your desk again, one leg lazily propped up on the chair, shoving a spoonful of cup noodles into your mouth while your laptop droned on in the background. a show was playing, but your eyes weren't really glued to the screen.

your eyes kept flickering over to her.

seriously, she looked good. really good. the kind of good that made your heart do a little weird flip like it was trying to audition for a circus act. this wasn't the first time you noticed chaewon was pretty; you'd known that even before you two became roommates. but maybe you just weren't really letting yourself look back then.

“hey, I'm going out.” chaewon suddenly announced, breaking the silence.

you looked away, acting like you were just now realizing that she was dressed up. “date?” you asked, trying to sound nonchalant but failing a bit.

“no, just going to a friend's birthday party off campus.”

you simply nodded, like it didn't matter at all. “cool, have fun.” 

chaewon paused at the door, throwing you a bit of a motherly vibe. “don't stay up too late,” she said as if she was giving a lecture. it was ironic, considering she was usually the one pulling late nights.

“I won't.” you replied, dismissive, trying to sound like you meant it. it was the kind of tone a kid might use when they're caught sneaking cookies for the fifth time.

once chaewon left, you slumped back in your chair, staring blankly at the screen, you had stopped eating—suddenly deep in thought. then a realization hit you. you had gotten used to it, hadn’t you? her usual chatter, her loud voice, the coffee she'd give you every morning.

you glanced at the door.

how long would she be gone?

and why did it matter?

frustrated at your own train of thought, you decided to text minjeong.

y/n [7:03 PM]:

—min, can i come over im DYINGGG RN

minjeong [7:03 PM]:

—no

—my roommate’s studying for a quiz, she'd kill me if u did

—what's up? 🤧

y/n [7:04 PM]:

—u come over then

minjeong [7:04 PM]:

—??? i need a reason 🙄

—if u wanna bang im down.

y/n [7:04 PM]:

—I DONT WANT TO?!$(#9_(!**

—eugh where'd you even get that idea

—i wanna talk about something 💔

minjeong [7:05 PM]:

—hang*

—SORRY

—is it serious

y/n [7:05 PM]:

—i js want someone to talk to bro?? 

minjeong [7:06 PM]: 

—isn't chaewon there? go hug ur gf or something 

—im not walking allat

y/n [7:08]:

—bro sybau she's not my gf 

—plus, she went out

minjeong [7:08 PM]:

—¯\_(ツ)_/¯

—omw

minjeong sat on your bed beside you, her expression a mix of amusement and disbelief. “let me get this straight. you made me come over because you just wanted to yap about your crush on your roommate?” she spoke carefully, making sure she got the facts straight.

you pinched the bridge of your nose, exasperated. “I do not have a crush on her.”

“uhuh, and you totally didn’t just say you couldn't stop looking at her earlier?” minjeong said, a teasing glint in her eyes.

"I did not."

“oh, yes you did.”

“not.”

“did.”

“not.”

“did.”

“not.”

“not.”

“did— oh, for the love of—” you gave minjeong a light punch on her arm, feeling a mix of irritation and laughter rising in you.

“so, do you like her?” minjeong leaned in, her voice dripping with playful curiosity.

“maybe? I don't know!” you hid you face in your hands wishing desperately for the floor to swallow you whole. “does she even like girls?”

“...I didn't think about that.” minjeong looked as devastated as you, even though she wasn't even the one questioning everything right now. “wait, let me check her insta.” 

you pried your hands off your face, scooting closer to see minjeong's screen.

minjeong searched high and low. she checked chaewon’s bio, peeked at her story highlights, and scrolled through her comments—which mostly consisted of yunjin asking for photo credits and random fans showering her with compliments. not a single clue about chaewon’s romantic interests.

you wanted to bang your head on the wall.

“girl, I give up.” minjeong tossed her phone into the empty space on the bed. “just ask her or something.”

“are you kidding? no way. I'm not doing anything about it.” you flopped back onto your bed, burying your face into a pillow like it would somehow save you.

minjeong stood up and gave you a judgemental look, “seriously? you're just gonna ignore it like that?”

“yeah.” you said, giving her a thumbs up, your voice muffled by the pillow.

minjeong, done with your nonsense, reached for her phone, ready to head out. “I should get going, it's already ten.”

you turned your head to the side, peeking at her. “we should totally have a sleepover sometime, just to... you know, binge watch that one cartoon with the sponge guy.” you muttered.

“summer break,” she replied, giving you a quick pat on the back, "good luck with chaewon, I guess. bye!" she shrugged, making her way to the door.

as the door clicked shut behind minjeong, she unexpectedly bumped into chaewon, who was doing her best to balance a box of donuts, her purse, her phone, and a tumbler that seemed like it might topple over at any second.

“oh, hi!” chaewon greeted her with a small smile, her free hand waving like it was trying to keep everything balanced.

“...heyy,” minjeong greeted back. awkwardly. she didn't expect to run into chaewon, the girl she just stalked a few minutes ago on instagram. “do you need any help?” she gestured at the items chaewon was carrying.

“no, no, I'm fine," chaewon laughed, but it was the kind of laugh that suggested she might not be fine at all.

they exchanged a small nod before minjeong started to walk past her, but suddenly stopped, a thought popping into her head. "uh, wait." 

chaewon tilted her head slightly, “yeah?”

“do you like girls?”

“...what?”

“like, romantically?” minjeong blurted out, immediately regretting her choice of words.

“...yes?” chaewon answered, taking a step back as if she was trying to physically distance herself from the awkwardness.

“okay, great, thanks, bye!” minjeong said quickly before bolting down the hallway as if she'd just asked if there were aliens among them.

chaewon watched minjeong dissapear into the distance, her brain still trying to process what just happened.

what in the world was that even about?

she shook her head in disbelief. chaewon finally entered the dorm, and there you were, sprawled out on your bed, scrolling through your phone.

“hey, I got donuts!” chaewon announced cheerfully as she took her shoes off with the help of her free hand.

you looked up from your phone, and for a moment, you swore you almost jumped off your bed to run and hug her, but you restrained yourself. instead, you put your phone aside and got off your bed before padding over to her.

“how was the birthday party?” you asked, reaching out to take the box from her hands, making it easier for her to put the rest of her things down.

she murmured a grateful ‘thanks’ looking a little flustered, “it went great! I had a really fun time. people were nice.”

“by the way,” she continued, setting her purse and tumbler down on a nearby table, “bumped into your friend a minute ago.” 

“minjeong? oh, she just wanted to hang out. hope you didn't mind her in here.” you were about to set the box down on her desk when she stopped you.

“put it on my bed instead.”

“and yeah, it's fine I don't mind her here.” she flashed you a smile as you followed her instruction, gently laying the box down. you couldn't help but smile back, feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.

chaewon settled on her bed and opened the box, patting the empty space beside her, “come sit.” 

you plopped down next to her, the soft mattress beneath you sinking down a little. chaewon handed you a chocolate donut, “you like chocolate, right?” 

“you remembered?” you took it from her, your fingers lightly brushing against hers ever so slightly.

you took a small bite. and holy moly you felt like you were taking a tour of donut paradise… it was airy and fluffy on the inside, it was slightly chewy but not dense or heavy, the flavors were balanced, it was perfect, to say the least. your eyes lit up like you'd just discovered treasure.

chaewon grinned, clearly pleased with herself. “of course I did.” 

“you and minjeong… you guys go way back right?” she asked you.

you looked at her, curiosity buzzing in your mind. “mhm, childhood friends. we were neighbors. anyway, what’s up with the sudden question?”

“eh, nothing, she just asked me a random question earlier so I decided to ask about her.” 

you raised a brow, but you didn’t question it. you could always poke around later.

meanwhile, chaewon was still contemplating why minjeong had asked her if she liked girls. was minjeong, of all people, into her?

the moment was interrupted as your phone buzzed. a notification. you turned your phone on,

minjeong [1m ago]

—chaewon likes girls, happy pride 🏳️‍🌈

you almost choked on the donut as you read it, your cheeks burning hotter than ever.

you sat beside minjeong in class, the professor’s voice droned on in the background like a distant lawnmower. your mind, however, was miles away, spiraling into thoughts of chaewon. not like you wanted to, everything just reminds you of her for some reason. 

“min, I’m gonna kill myself everything reminds me of chaewon!” you whispered, trying your best not to be obvious.

“just admit it, you like her.” minejong rolled her eyes, not even bothering to hide her smirk, “you were like this the last time you had a two year crush on our class president in high school.”

“never mention yeji ever again. and so, what if I do like chaewon? not like anything's gonna happen anyway,” you grumbled. frustration, bubbling up inside you. you were just about to try and focus on the lecture again when you suddenly heard a hushed: “wait, you liked me?”

you turned your head slowly, feeling the dread creep in. and boomshakalaka, there she was, hwang yeji... this time you really wanted to bang your head on the table. you immediately faced forward again, pretending like you were paying attention to whatever the professor was talking about.

“wowww, so suddenly the lecture seems so interesting now, huh?” minjeong snickered, leaning back in her seat.

absolutely.

when class finally ended, you found yourself walking alone with yeji. she suddenly tagged along before you could run away. and minjeong… minjeong had abandoned you long ago, such a true friend in times of need, 10/10, five stars, would recommend.

as soon as you both stepped outside, the sky decided it'd be a good time to mess with you today. it was pouring rain. 

“wow, lucky me.” you muttered, reaching a hand out towards the rain. you quickly pulled it back and glanced at yeji.

“you got an umbrella? ‘cause I don't.” she laughed, then smiled, looking back at you. “wanna make a run for it?”

you quickly averted your gaze, feeling your cheeks warm up. it wasn't like you liked her anymore, no, she just had this uncanny ability to make you nervous for no good reason. “no, we'll catch a cold. let's wait it out.”

“okay, mom.” yeji said, her voice dripping with sarcasm, earning an eye roll from you.

“about earlier…” she trailed off, leaning casually against a pillar. oh dear, here comes the big question. “did you actually like me?”

standing awkwardly next to her, you began fidgeting with the keychain on your bag. “yeah, I did.”

“I did too, senior year.” she admitted.

“really? I thought you had a thing for guy with the weird hair or something.” you were genuinely surprised.

"who? oh him..." she waved it off, chuckling. "and yes, really. I don't like you anymore though," she clarified with a grin.

you nodded, “neither do I.”

“then tell me this," she paused for a second. "what did you like about me? just curious, you know? gotta fill the time somehow."

“unbelievable.” you sighed out.

and just like that, the two of you fell into a casual conversation. for the next ten minutes you chatted about the silly things you admired in each other, the ups and downs of life, and the odd little things that made you both laugh. slowly but surely, you warmed up, and before you knew it, you were joking around with her like old pals. you even found the courage to spill your thoughts about chaewon, trying to hide the smile tugging at your lips as you did.

chaewon stepped out of the building, umbrella in hand. she scanned the small crowd, eyes flickering from one group to another.

where were you?

she had wrapped up her cheer practice early, all for you. knowing you never brought an umbrella with you, she had set out to find you, hoping you weren't getting soaked out there.

and then she saw you.

you were just a few feet across from her, laughing at something yeji said. the sound was the same warm, easy laugh you usually gave her, and it was like a punch to the gut. chaewon slowed her steps, her heart doing a little flip.

her smile faded.

who was she?

her grip tightened around the umbrella's handle, fingers curling a little too hard. she didn't even realize she had stopped walking.

it wasn't like she hadn't seen you talk to other people before. but this felt different, too familiar, too close, like you were sharing a private joke.

it shouldn't have bothered her.

but it did.

without thinking, chaewon forced a smile and called out. “y/n!” 

your head turned, and the spark in your eyes was instant recognition. you spotted her immediately, jogging over to you with that trademark grin on her face.

she stopped once she was right beside you, trying to play it cool. “I was looking everywhere for you.” she glanced at yeji then back at you. “who's your friend?”

“I'm yeji, hwang yeji. we were just catching up with some stuff.” yeji introduced herself. just as she finished, her eyes suddenly darted to her her watch. “oh no, would you look at the time? I gotta go!” she sent you a wink, giving you a knowing look before going back into the building.

you regretted telling her about chaewon.

chaewon watched yeji leave, brows furrowed like she had been told that her dog was ugly. and that wink? it didn't sit well with chaewon.

chaewon opened the umbrella before intertwining her free hand with yours. “let's go,” she said, pulling you towards the dorms.

the two of you shared the space under the umbrella, shoulders frequently brushing against each other that felt both cozy and awkward. “your shoulder's getting wet.” you moved a little to the side, trying to give her some more space

she shook her head and pulled you closer, “it's okay.”

you hated how sweet she was, really, it was like trying to resist a cupcake when you were already full. it wasn't fair how she made your heart beat faster everytime she smiled.

"at least let me hold the umbrella," you suggested.

she shot you a look that clearly said she wasn’t thrilled with the idea, but she eventually gave in, handing it over with a sigh.

as you took the umbrella, you subtly shifted it over to her side, not bothering to care if your own shoulder got drenched.

chaewon lounged on the couch in the dorm shared by yunjin and kazuha, the smell of freshly baked pizza hanging in the air. sakura was seated beside her, pizza slice in hand, while the other two were debating over which color of nintendo joy-con was superior—kazuha was on team green, while yunjin was defending the pink one.

“so,” sakura took a big bite of her pizza, her eyes narrowing in on chaewon, “you and that girl…” 

chaewon raised a brow, “what girl?”

“the girl you wait for every morning. you know, your roommate.”

chaewon made a small ‘o’ with her mouth when she realized who sakura was talking about. “oh! y/n? what about her?”

“you’ve been spending alot of time with her lately. got something to tell us?” sakura asked, her tone suspicious.

“no? I don't think so.” chaewon was confused, she didn't get it.

sakura rolled her eyes dramatically like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “come on! are you guys, like, together? in a romantic way?

“no, we aren't...” chaewon didn't know why sakura was asking her these questions. was she too obvious? what if you had also noticed?

sakura thought about it for a second. you aren't in a relationship, but chaewon wouldn't shut up about you and bought you coffee every morning? 

then it clicked.

“you like her!” sakura exclaimed, her voice rising like she had uncovered a groundbreaking secret which caught the attention of yunjin and kazuha.

they stared at her, waiting for an answer.

chaewon tried to play it cool, trying to suppress the heat from rising up to her cheeks. “pssh— y/n? nooo, why would I?” she waved her hands dismissivey, but the blush was betraying her.

“oh please, you totally give her heart eyes every time you look at her.” yunjin chimed in, pointing and laughing a little.

chaewon grabbed a random pillow beside her, using it to cover her face. “I don't,” she mumbled, muffled by the cushion.

“you won't mind if I ask for her number then?” yunjin teased, her phone already in her hand.

then yunjin felt something hit her face.

“oomph—!”

chaewon threw the pillow at her.

“fine, I like her. but only a little bit…”  she whispered, “actually, a lot.”

the trio erupted into a fit of giggles, practically bouncing in their seats. "when's the confession? kazuha chirped.

“never.”

“oh come onnnn, let me help you!” 

“me too!" sakura added.

“me three! wait—eunchae might want in.” yunjin said, already tapping out a message on her phone.

chaewon slumped down in her seat, letting out a melodramatic sigh. “no.”

yunjin plopped down beside her, a moment of realization hitting her “wait, wait was she the y/n you asked about months ago?”

she hesitated, “uh, well…” she trailed off, sounding like someone's mom getting ready to tell one of those classic ‘back in my days…’ stories.

chaewon stepped into the newly opened café sakura had told her about. the moment she stepped inside, a soft breeze of cold air hit her, a contrast to the blazing heat that had been practically cooking her outside.

she glanced around, taking in the cozy decor, the warm yellow lighting, and the light chatter of customers. she made her way towards the counter, eyes landing on the chalkboard menu. she should've asked sakura for a recommendation, because now, she was left wondering what to pick.

she stopped once she was in front of the counter, eyes dropping down to the barista in front of her.

“hi, uh…” her eyes darted to the barista's name tag. “y/n? hi.”

you raised a brow, taken aback that she had greeted you first instead of the other way around. “yeah, hi, what can I get for you?”

chaewon blinked, her mind racing. what on earth should she order? before she could think, she blurted out the words: “just— what's your usual?” panic started to set in.

“my usual? as in what I usually order?” you asked, trying to wrap your head around her odd question.

“yes. I'm just trying out new things, you get it, right? haha…” chaewon masked her nervousness, trying to act casual and confident, but inside she felt like a flustered mess.

‘you're lowkey kinda weird.’

‘zuha, let her continue the story.’

“extra sweet, no cream, iced coffee.”

“huh?”

“...my usual,” you clarified.

“oh! right, right… yeah, I'll get that one. 16oz.” she said, feeling a bit more reassured as she nodded. it didn't sound awful, but definitely not something chaewon would order on a daily basis.

you scanned the cups beside you found the right one, then looked back at her, “kim chaewon, right?” you took the marker from your pocket and holding it at the ready, waiting for her confirmation.

chaewon’s eyes widened in surprise, “that's… right. how'd you know?” 

“same university.” you wrote her name down with practiced ease.

instantly, chaewon's face lit up like a christmas tree, a smile spreading across her face, “really? why haven't I seen you around? what do you major in?” her curiosity was piqued, and she couldn't help but lean towards you a little more, her chin resting in the palm of her hand.

“engineering,” you muttered, turning away to prepare her order. she didn't move just yet, not really wanting to leave. after all, there was no one waiting behind her and it felt oddly nice to chat.

you didn't fangirl or do anything awkward you just treated her like a regular person, and that felt like a breath of fresh air. she hoped she could be friends with you.

‘y/n’, ‘engineering’, and your usual order. she took note of that.

a moment later, you came back with her order. you slid the cup across the counter towards her, “₩3,500.”

chaewon quickly fished some money from her pocket, paying you with a grin, “I'll see you around,”.

as she stepped outside, she checked the cup for a note, your number, maybe? but all she saw was her name and her order in neat handwriting. 

“bummer,” she muttered to herself with a hint of disappointment.

‘you know you could've just went back, right?’

‘shut up, yunjin.’

chaewon laid down on her bed, phone in hand.

-THE CLICK (not clique)-

pupu [9:37 PM]:

—does anyb know a girl named y/n

yunjinie [9:37 PM]:

—IK A KINDERGARTNER NAMED Y/N

—SHE'S IN THE US THOUGHHH RAHHHHH🦅🦅

manchae [9:38 PM]:

—WHY ARE WE SHOUTING

yunjinie [9:38 PM]:

—I DON'T KNOW

pupu [9:38 PM]:

—@ kkura, @ zuha? 

kkura [9:39 PM]:

—no lol 😅

zuha [9:39 PM]:

—idk

—anyone want a cupcake tmrw?

yunjinie [9:39 PM]:

—me PLSSS

—ZUHA PSLSLLSLSLS

zuha [9:40 PM]:

—no one? okay.

pupu [9:40 PM]:

—y'all useless af bruh

chaewon let out a long sigh before burying her face in her pillow. 

“ohh, why didn't you just come back to the café the next day though?” kazuha asked.

chaewon paused, her eyes wide and blinking as if trying to process the thought. then, in a moment of fluster she hid her face in her hands. the sight was so comical that yunjin could hardly contain herself; she erupted into laughter. she laughed so hard that she felt tears prickling the corners of her eyes, clutching her stomach as if it might burst with how much she's laughing.

“...I didn't think of that.” chaewon sheepishly admitted.

weeks passed and instead of fading away, the feeling grew more every second. chaewon felt like she was being eaten alive by the urge to tell you everything and spill her heart out.

but neither of you said anything.

not when you caught each other staring. not when she brought you your favorite snack after a long day, mumbling that she “just happened to pass by the store.”

and definitely not when you found yourself grinning like a little kid at your phone when her name lit up the screen.

then came that morning. you were just walking through the dormitory hallway, making your way outside. when chaewon suddenly appeared out of nowhere with a cup of iced coffee in her hands and handed it over without saying a single word. nothing out of the ordinary. 

but instead of walking with you like usual, she took off at full speed, making you feel like a deer caught in headlights, left standing there with your mouth slightly agape and a puzzled expression.

that's when you noticed the small note taped to the side. nothing new. she sometimes left silly doodles or passive-aggressive reminders to eat, but something about today felt different.

you peeled it open.

‘I like you, a lot. maybe you don't feel the same and that’s okay, but I really wanted to tell you so here’s this note. hopefully this doesn't ruin anything between us.

–chaewon𖹭’

you stared at the note.

your chest felt tight, your ears were ringing, and the coffee in your hand suddenly felt warm even though it was iced.

chaewon didn’t stop running until she was halfway across campus, ducking behind a vending machine like she was being hunted.

what was she thinking?

chaewon could feel her heart pounding. not from the sprint, but from you. from the way her fingers brushed against yours, the way you looked at her, the fact that the note she reread ten times was now in your possession...

she buried her face in her hands, shaking her head. “I’m so stupid,” she whispered to herself. “why did I run?”

if she had stayed, she might've exploded waiting for your reaction. because part of her was terrified you'd read the note and never look at her the same again.

but another part of her, an annoyingly hopeful one, was already imagining you showing up. finding her. saying something. anything.

so she waited.

she stood in front of the vending machine, pretending to look at snack options she didn't even want.

then you found her. just fifteen minutes before classes start.

“chae!” you called out. it wasn't a generic ‘hey’, it wasn't a formal ‘chaewon’, it was ‘chae’. that made her heart flutter. just a little too much for a normal morning.

chaewon froze halfway through opening a bag of chips. she slowly turned around, the moment almost theatrical.

“did you uh…” she paused for a second to keep herself calm. “did you see the note?”

in response, you held it up like evidence, “I did.”

she opened her mouth ready to say something, but instead, closed it again, feeling hesitant. “okay…”

a beat of silence passed.

“you ran really fast,” you broke the silence.

“embarrassment fuels speed,” she muttered, rubbing the back of her neck. “I didn't know how you were gonna react. I panicked.”

“you could've waited, you know.” you replied, voice softer this time. “I was going to say something.”

she stared at you, a mix of hope and nervousness in her eyes. “yeah?”

you nodded, a small smile creeping onto your face. ‘‘I like you too.”

chaewon’s face heated up like a boiled potato, and despite her efforts to maintain her composure, her lips curled up to a smile that could light up the whole campus. “like, like like?”

you laughed lightly, the sound melting away the last bit of tension “yes, like like.” 

“cool cool cool cool cool cool…” she repeated, trying to keep her cool and not burst into pieces out of happiness right then and there.

“weirdo,” you mumbled affectionately.

just like that walked to your classes together, her hand naturally finding yours, like it had always belonged there. you didn't need many words this time; it felt easy.

chaewon would occasionally swing your joined hands as you walked, grinning at you like an idiot. even with so many eyes watching you didn't let go.

she glanced over at you, and you were already looking at her.

this time, neither of you looked away.

ᯓ★BONUS

you sat across from chaewon, the cold breeze from the café's ac sending a shiver down your spine. you wrapped your hands around the warm cup of chocolate milk, hoping to keep some heat as you tried to shake off the chill.

“so,” you started, taking a sip of your drink before continuing. “how'd you know what my usual was?”

chaewon raised her brows, surprised with the question. “you don't remember?”

you gave her a confused look. “remember what?”

“when you worked here for the summer. I asked what your usual was because I didn't know what to order.” 

you blinked, “that was you?”

“who did you think it was? oh my gosh, were you thinking about another girl?” chaewon feigned a hurt and offended expression, dropping her fork to put her hand over her chest. 

the way she exaggerated her offense made you burst into laughter. you could feel the eyes of the other customers on you, but honestly, you didn't care. the owner was used to your antics anyway.

you wiped the tears that formed from laughing so hard, “you're so dramatic.” you managed to say.

chaewon gave you a cheeky grin, eyes sparkling with mischief, “and you love that about me.” 

you did. undeniably so.

[papenathys]

One of the things I find particularly interesting about the rise of cozy or "queernorm" fantasy books in the past couple of years is when authors want to specifically focus on one kind of oppression, while eradicating the rest from their fantasy universe.

This is NOT referring to some authors who don't want to overstep with alternate histories or queer stories. For example, I don't mind that Andrew Joseph White mainly portrayed the lives of white transmasculine folks in The Spirit Bares Its Teeth, a horror fantasy novel which is set in Victorian England, without his mentioning the plight of people of color, especially colonized subjects, probably living through the same harrowing cult-like medical experimentation and loss of bodily autonomy as the central white British characters did (and probably worse, because of race, colonisation and class differences). That is actually okay with me, because that is not his story to tell. This is not so much erasure, as discretion about choosing what you can write about, with tact and responsibility.

However, as for the Bridgerton-style rise of alternate fantasy or "diverse" historical romances, I notice that I often come across books where people use neopronouns and everyone is ok with gay marriage, and racism is also eradicated from the world (not just legally, but socio-culturally) but like.....upper class cis women are still somehow the most oppressed faction of all, and are getting bartered into arranged marriages with dukes and nobles.

And this bothers me to some degree, because it seems to contradict how the structures of oppression are interlinked, and how these structures depend on each other to keep functioning stably.

Take for example, marriage and capitalism. Like, you're telling me in your queernorm universe, people are okay with same-sex relationships and marriage. This implies, at least on a very simplified level, that society has overcome its prejudices (or never had any, to begin with) against

a) romantic relationships that do not replicate heteronormativity, or domestic structures.

b) alliances with high chances of non-traditional family structures, in terms of procreation, kinship and offspring. in simpler terms, more possibility of living together (not marriage), or alternately, child-free marriage, poly relationships, commune systems etc.

c) individuals with non-normative marginalized genders.

This would ideally imply that there is no need for women's bodies to be used as capital, and they are no longer dehumanized, used as material goods (in their roles as wives and mothers, in terms of labor and sexual service) and that society is chill with any type of union, even outside of institutionally sanctioned marriages.

However, instead, for necessary conflict, there is *still* intense and often violent social pressures upon women to get married and reproduce in these queernorm books. Why. Like let's just take a moment. Why. If the heteropatriarchy has been dismantled, or at least isn't so rigorously adhered to as in the real world, why is there one isolated axis of oppression that persists in this case (by isolated, I don't mean for individuals, I mean only applicable to one marginalized group)?

I feel like I'm not doing a great job explaining this, but you guys know what I mean right?

Note: I also know that historically upper class women were cordoned off from participating in labor, and often their duties were relegated to childbirth and upholding traditional marriage, while lower-class/caste women were expected to be the bread earners and participate in labor with the male members of their family. But again, let us consider the context of this diverse society and see how that system holds up. Why? Is the functionality of this queernorm society still contingent to the rules of capitalism?

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing Basics: Descriptive Verbs

A verb is a word that’s used to describe an action.

Descriptive verbs - (or strong verbs) are single-word actions that add to the tableau in the reader’s mind, giving it a boost of color and energy.

In many cases, an engaging, vivid verb is more concise and telling than a straightforward, overused one.

The man ran quickly toward the smoke, versus 

The man sprinted toward the smoke.

Weak verbs are simply common ones—words that describe the bare minimum of the action. Sometimes that’s the best way to keep your writing clean and direct, but it can also lead to a lack of color, or personality.

Types of Descriptive Verbs

The most powerful verbs evoke imagery and emotion in the action of the verb itself. A dog doesn’t just eat its food—it gobbles it. The glass doesn’t just break—it shatters.

Questions to consider when replacing your verbs:

Verbs of movement: Movement is especially ripe for descriptive words. Movements communicate how your characters feel, what they want, and how they present themselves to the world. Is your character merely walking along from point a to b? Or do they project more attitude with a saunter or perhaps swagger? Are they in a skipping mood? These movement verbs can also denote a sense of place, and urgency: Depending on the terrain, perhaps they plod through mud or stagger over jagged rocks. Suspicious characters might slink away into the darkness, or scamper just out of reach.

Verbs of stillness: In real life, stillness is never entirely devoid of movement, and is equally revealing. A nervous character doesn’t merely sit, they perch on the edge of their seat. A rude character might slouch in their chair. A character who has just received terrible news may slump on the couch.

Verbs for speech and expression: With dialogue attribution, you could write an entire novel using only “said,” without having to resort to more descriptive verbs like “shouted,” “cried,” or “whimpered.” The best answer is a balance: try to keep your language from jarring the reader out of the story, but considering your character’s intent when searching for the right descriptive verb in dialogue also allows you to quickly deliver more information to the reader. When is a laugh so cruel it becomes more of a snicker, or so unguarded it bursts forth as a guffaw? Muttering a word under the breath might be a sign of dissent, while a whimper is one of surrender. Create volume in your dialogue by introducing sound-oriented synonyms, like whispers or shouts.

When to Use Descriptive Verbs

The best verbs help you hone your prose to give you the effect you wish to achieve. Think about the tone do you want to set—what feelings or mood do you want to evoke? What kind of language will best deliver the story you want to tell?

Reading your work aloud is an excellent way to both hear the sonic effects of your prose and catch awkward repeated sounds or other unintended effects. Read through your writing and make a note of where things feel too slow, or stale.

Where are the moments where your prose stalls out? Highlight all the verbs you’ve used in that section and find stronger words to heighten the tension or enhance the mood of the scene.

Reasons to Use Descriptive Verbs in Writing

Using descriptive verbs is especially useful when considering pacing; active verbs help anchor your writing in the present tense, contributing to the exciting (or suspenseful, emotional, moody, exuberant) tone you might be going for.

Weak verbs, in general, are often supported by adverbs of manner (those descriptive words that end in “-ly”). Good descriptive verbs rid your sentences of the need for too many adverbs, and can also keep state-of-being verbs (like am, is, are, and was, which lead to passive voice) in check.

Source ⚜ More: Writing Notes & References ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs

[ohyouluckysaint]

⋆ cw ➟ 𝐍𝒮𝐅𝐖(𝟏𝟖+) ╱ RATED R. sfw and nsfw hc’s. nsfw ones are honestly straight p∗rn without written scenarios attached.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who’s 100% an ass girl. She’s gripping or smacking ‘til there’s a handprint when she can. But, if you asked her she’d say she’s more into thighs or just about everything as long as it’s you which isn’t exactly a lie.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi looks for her girlfriend in the crowd no matter what when she’s readying for saddle bronc riding and you’re always there. You hold a big head sign on a stick of her with kiss marks all over it and cheer your lungs out for her.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who’s a proud eater and doesn’t give a fuck if you have a bush. She prefers to keep herself trimmed though. She leaves her happy trail more often than not ever since you complimented it before when she forgot to shave it.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who’ll kiss you even if you just came on her tongue or if she just came on yours.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi stuffs her lithe fingers in your mouth and her eyes widen halfway with mirth when you beg her to do it in the moment.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who’s your go to driver when heading somewhere.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who’s wary of your friends, but they think she’s cool especially since you love her and they trust your opinion. They definitely initially find her intimidating at first.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who indulges you when you ask things like “would you still love me if I was a strawberry?”

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who refers to her strap on as a dick.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who’d rather give than receive, but doesn’t mind if you go down on her. She loves it too and makes it evident by being somewhat vocal but it’s mostly gasps, soft sighs, stuttering choked moans (when she’s close), and near constant facial expressions.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who barks orders at men and glares at more than half of them, but is the complete opposite around you.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who’ll get bothered but not particularly upset if she feels like her girlfriend lets her win at something. She loves a challenge no matter how big or small and she plays to win with effort.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who’s all about aftercare.

cowgirl.ᐟtashi who’s into PDA, but draws the line at stereotypically being that one couple in line at a fair or an amusement park. She full blown cringes at couples that are like that and has her two cents about it that’s pretty colorful.

𝖲𝖠𝖨𝖭𝖳 𝖲𝖠𝖸𝖲.ᐟ ⸝⸝ ˎˊ˗ just dropping this to keep everyone fed while I’m still busy writing a cowgirl!tashi blurb that I started on the 15th. Hope this suffices in the meantime.

๑‎ ⏖ 𐂃 ℧ ﹢﹒ᶻ interested in more .ᐣ 𓎟𓎟 previous cowgirl!tashi work browse through the catalog submit reqs 𖬺 follow

© 2025 𝖮𝖧𝖸𝖮𝖴𝖫𝖴𝖢𝖪𝖸𝖲𝖠𝖨𝖭𝖳. All rights reserved. I stress that you do not repost, translate, alter, or plagiarize my content on any platform, including—but not limited to—my theme. You are welcome to take inspiration as long as you ask me directly and have my explicit consent.

[lizpaige]

okay wait I find the TRC graphic novel major arcana tarot assignments are so interesting and I am assuming that MStief had a say in this, so let me share some quotes from her book about tarot for the individual card meanings. Tarot has all different meanings with similar themes, but I thought it'd be interesting to look at what stief thinks about these cards herself.

All quotes are from Illuminating the Prophecy by Maggie Stiefvater. I highly recommend the book if you're interest in tarot or just are obsessed with the series.

BLUE - JUSTICE "When you see the Justive card, it reminds you that you may have fudged the rules a little and got away with it, or you may have persuaded others that your dubious choice was a correct one, but the universe believes in an absolute right or wrong, and you will get what you deserve based upon that. This card is also a reminder that your reward or punishment is often unseen. A bad turn performed on someone else will haunt you years later, and likewise, an unnoticed kind event will create its own reward inside you. At the end of it, you will become the product of these actions: you are the Justice. There's an intense comfort to knowing that you have this control, especially if you feel your good intentions are being taken poorly." - pg. 41-42

ADAM - THE MAGICIAN "Regardless of who or what you believe in, the Magician is an extraordinary master of all trades, and he is resilient because no matter what the world throws at him, no matter how much he loses, he will always have the most powerful tool at his command: himself." pg. 21-22

GANSEY - THE CHARIOT "The duality that the Lovers card mutters about becomes a proper problem by the time the Chariot shows up in a reading. There are two sides to you, seemingly opposite, and you keep being thrown from one to the other. In many decks, this card depicts two beasts of different color pulling a chariot; when they agree on a direction, the chariot moves forward swiftly. When they disagree, the chariot grinds to a halt. You've ground to a halt... "The chariot's not moving because you can't figure out how to get yourself in line. You can't figure out which you you want to be. The Chariot isn't really about choice, though. It's about balance. You aren't cutting one of the beasts free so that you can move on without it. The chariot will move with only pone of them, but not as fast as if you found a way to make them both move in the same direction. The Chariot tells you that there is a way to satisfy the warring parts of you. Find your self-control, embrace your dark and light sides, and enjoy the ride." pg. 33-34

RONAN - THE LOVERS "This card can represent actual lov ers, and when it does, the love pictured is epic - the pairing pof two souls so complementary that it seems obvious that some greater power has designed them for each other. But it can also represent a duality inside you, and the complementary pairing it refers to is your inner self and your outer self. Just like in a great love affair, everything is perfect when both sides of you are working in harmony. And just like in a great love affair, the world crumbles when you war with yourself. The card speaks to the power of wholeness and knowing yourself." - pg. 31-32

NOAH - THE HANGED MAN "The Hanged Man is all about sacrifice - not a martyr's sacrifice, but a scholar's sacrifice. He goes not only willingly, but pleasantly toward his hanging, certain that the time spent in agony will be worth it... When this card shows up in your reading, it's a sign that whatever answer you seek is not going to simply be handed to you. You need to level up in some way, and it's going to require a genuine effort on your part. It doesn't mean that it requires hard work or a huge sum of money... It requires you to literally prostrate yourself on the altar of wisdom, holding yourself vulnerable, looking deep inside yourself for answers. You've got to let go and be willing to let knowledge and transformation take you." - pg. 43-44

[moxiepower2]

Nevermore theory based on RnF’s latest post!

I think the eyeball in the center is both a reference to both the Old Man with the pale blue eye from “The Tell-Tale” Heart AND Ligeia’s eyes from “Ligeia”

(1/3) First of all: Ligeia’s Eyes

The coloring of the eyes doesn’t quite fit with the art in the post (Ligeia’s has black eyes) BUT I find it hard to ignore the star and dream imagery used when it’s VERY present in “Ligeia”.

The narrator (the husband) studies astrology and is DEEPLY in love with the darkly beautiful and intelligent Ligeia. She is described almost like a vampire with long raven hair, ivory skin, and a wild appearance. He is especially fascinated by her unusual large black eyes which he compares to the “twin stars of Leda” and describes them as “luminous orbs” (this last part also reminds me of the “orbs” from the 1st episode btw).

Ligeia later dies of illness, telling the narrator of her deeply love and reciting a poem about the unfairness of mortality on her deathbed. In his grief, the narrator becomes addicted to opium and later remarries Lady Rowena whom he doesn’t love. He ignores her, preferring to find comfort in “opium dreams” during which he has vivid visions of Ligeia.

Two months into his new marriage Lady Rowena also falls ill and is rendered into a state of half-slumber. Rowena also often has fits and starts crying out in her sleep leading the narrator to believe that some “phantasmagoric influence” is haunting Rowena in their bedchamber.

The narrator’s sanity/accuracy is honestly questionable before the “haunting”. He has a bad memory and doesn’t even remember MEETING LIGEIA OR HER LAST NAME?? The narration given is honestly pretty dreamlike itself as it’s hard tell what’s real or not between the husband’s opium addiction, bad memory, and debatable sanity.

At the end of the story, Lady Rowena dies and according to the narrator, her dead body turns into Ligeia. The corpse awakens the next day as newly risen and alive Ligeia who has seemingly defeated death.

“Here then, at least," I shrieked aloud, "can I never --can I never be mistaken --these are the full, and the black, and the wild eyes --of my lost love --of the lady --of the LADY LIGEIA."

(What a very sane human being as per usual in Pow stories. Also, this went on a bit long sorry)

(2/3) The Old Man

Hang in there with me, this part is much much quicker to explain!

So, Tell-Tale Heart. I think this is a Poe story everyone pretty much knows. Guy is seemingly driven to madness out of fear of his old neighbor’s pale blue eye. He secretly watches the Old Man while he’s sleeping and later murders him and stuffs the body parts under his floor. When the police later arrive at the house, our narrator believes he hears the sounds of the Old Man’s heart and confessed his guilt.

Some imagery: Not much star imagery but definitely some of dreams/sleep. Much like Ligeia, the narration is definitely dreamlike. The Narrator is unreliable/insane so it’s hard to tell what observations he makes are actually real. The Old Man and the Narrator struggle with nightmares. A good chunk of this story is spent with narrator as he watches the Old Man sleep every night for a week.

Also, the eye in RnF’s post is a SINGLE PALE BLUE EYE. (Yeah, this last one is definitely surface-level evidence but I don’t think it’s without merit)

That’s pretty much it.

(3/3) How does this all connect?

The main reason I think that this new art piece connects to Ligeia AND The Tell-Tale heart is largely due to THESE GUYS

That’s right, Deans Merry and Mourn.

The Tell-Tale Heart

Awhile back I made a post theorizing that Annabel is connected to The Tell-Tale Heart due to the heart imagery surrounding her character (such as her spectre design). In the reblogs, me and @muzetrigger discussed more detailed theories (off-topic but @muzetrigger made a VERY convincing argument that Annabel Lee might play the role of the Narrator)

One of the topics that came up was the possibility of the Deans representing the character of the Old Man. @blacknedsoul-blog made a post a while back “I Think the Deans Are Fucking Lovecraftian Gods” (highly recommend) which pointed out that the Deans’ white/black heterochromia could be a reference to the Old Man’s cataract-ridden eye. Upon a closer look, it’s even possible that their white eyes are actually a very very pale blue.

I would also like to add on to this theory by pointing out that much like the Old Man’s Eye drove the Narrator to murder and madness (though unwittingly), the Deans are driving the students to those very same things by forcing a bunch of already traumatized people to participate in a death game.

Ligeia

Earlier in this post, I mentioned that the husband from Ligeia compared her eyes to “the twin stars of Leda”

These TWIN stars, Castor and Pollux named after a pair of TWINS from greek mythology are widely known as the “Heavenly TWINS” and form part of the constellation Gemini. Hmmmm….

A few more similarities to Ligeia:

The Deans also have the ability to get in people’s heads and MESS WITH THEIR MEMORIES. In Ligeia, the Husband is completely consumed with thoughts/visions of Ligeia for most of his waking and sleeping hours. He is seemingly unable to focus on anything else and this continues even when his new wife Lady Rowena is dying. As mentioned before, the Husband also has a memory problems and can’t remember meeting Ligeia or even her full name, just that he loved her. This is not unlike the memory loss of all the students at Nevermore Academy, particularly Lenore & Annabel Lee.

By the way, have a mentioned how interesting this panel from the Bell Arc is? It’s very suspicious the we glimpses of the eldritch forms of the Deans and their Pale Blue Eyes right before Annabel Lee experiences a flashback of hearing the news of Lenore’s death. Not to mention they are physically lowering Annabel INTO THE MEMORY. Its almost like the Deans are the ones took the memories in first place and are just “returning” them or part of their job is being responsible for guiding students to their memories. HMMMM……

Not to mention they spend most of their time in DREAMLAND, a special dimension where you can relive past memories and even reach those whom you unable to speak with. Like say… a certain French man who’s UNCONSCIOUS in a brick wall.

Also, I seem to recall there’s definitely some night sky related imagery with these two. Especially when we are getting glimpses of their spectrey/eldritchy side.

Lastly, let’s go back to the Deans’s heterochromia. They both each have one BLACK EYE and together that makes a pair.

Also, I might be reading into this WAY too much but, take a good close look at the black eyes. In each, you’ll notice there’s a small white pupil. Kind of like a a single bright star in the black night sky. Two twin stars.

[midnight-mourning]

Shorelocked

🐟🐟Midnight's DCA MerMay Day 3🐟🐟

guhhh sorry for the incredible delay, i had finals, my monthly, and then got sick back to back weeks. I am well now (and have many writings to share) will be releasing two a day as I get caught up. For now, please enjoy ^^

Prompt: It's almost fish month!!! For this lovely month of mermay: yn finds canon eclipse (strange fish with two personalities? Just one guy?) washed up on the beach near their house. Poor clip is injured, so they nurse him back to health and get closer in the process. I request a fish kiss. And snuggling (tempest can't survive without fish snuggles)

DCFPU prompt used: Pair

Word Count: 2387

Story will be posted to ao3 soon!

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The wind blows harshly right as you open the door to your car. You squint against it, having to fight to get it shut and locked. Staring up at the grey sky, you see the clouds are rolling through quickly, another storm must be on its way. 

You look out to the sea, watching the waves crash angrily into the shore, the sound louder than usual and reaching you easily from hundreds of yards away. Bits of sand blow past and graze the skin of your ankles, reminding you the best place for you now would be inside your home. Cozy and content while the weather outside takes a turn for the worse. If that was even possible. 

You're taking one last scanning look out to the sea when you spy it, or rather him, as you'd come to quickly find out. A large, dull-colored mass lying on the shore, waves rippling around it. At first you think it’s  just a large clump of seaweed but looking closer you can see the fish tail which floats in the water behind the rest of the mass. 

It's... some sort of sea creature but certainly not one you're familiar with. You start to walk down the beach, pulled towards it by something within you. From here you can see jagged fins are across its back, a splattering of reds and oranges and deep blues cover the body. 

The human-like proportions of the head and neck are just as shocking as the arms which are sprawled out beneath it. It seems to be dead, completely motionless. Until, right when you're but a few mere yards away, you see its chest rise and fall into the wet sand. 

It's face down, the smattering of fins around half its head covering any features that may lie beneath. You're afraid to get closer, but upon seeing the large gashes in its side, and the rips in its tail, the physician in you kicks in. Especially given how slow the creature's breathing truly is. 

A boom of thunder erupts above you and you look to the ever-blackening sky. Back down the sand. You'll need to be quick. Both for the sake of getting out of the storm, and saving this thing's life. 

You hurry back up to your home, to the garage you'd long ago converted into a cluttered mess of an emergency clinic. To your credit, sometimes it was just safer to treat anything that washed up here before attempting to move them to the sanctuary. Though you'll admit it could be a lot more organized than it was in that moment. 

You scan and find the stretcher you use for larger mammals like seals or dolphins, hoping it'll be big enough for what was lying on the shore. As you hurry back you find it harder and harder to deny how the fishy being looks strikingly like the mermaids you'd heard about in stories as a kid. And given you have no other reference for what it could be, calling it a mer was the best you could manage from the time being. 

It's still breathing as you make it back, sprinklings of rain beginning to fall lightly onto your hands and hair. You roll up your sleeves, cursing yourself for not grabbing a pair of gloves to get a better grip but deciding there's no time for it. You take a deep breath and reach a hand out to touch the mer's head. No response. Not good. 

You need to pick up the pace. So, hoping that the spines along its forearms aren't poisonous, you take hold of its wrist and start to tug it onto the stretcher. It's not easy work, and neither will be trying to drag it up the beach to your garage. But if you can haul a juvenile walrus up that expanse of sand, surely you could drag this guy. 

By the time you make it to your garage it's pouring down rain in sheets. You struggle, but heave a few more faithful steps, stopping just before the in-ground pool that takes up a full corner of the space. Your arms relax, feeling strained, but you turn around, finally able to get a better look at the sea creature's injuries—

Only to come face to clawed hand with it. You choke as said hand snatches hold of your throat, gripping tightly. You feel something begin to drip down your neck and chest. Your own blood, you quickly realize. 

You grab at the hand with your own, unable to get a hold on it due to your panic. Failing about a bit in your efforts to escape. In doing so, you look down to the mer that's now sitting up, seeing the glare on his features. You plead with your own eyes for him to stop, and it must do something as he suddenly snaps out of it, releasing you. 

You gasp, nearly falling to the floor as you cough, holding your bleeding throat. 

"Sorry, sorry, friend." You hear, looking up shocked to find that he's speaking. "But too close. Far too close. Should stay back. Unless you want to be hurt, hurt, hurt."

You put your free hand up, backing away. "Okay okay, loud and c-clear." You cough and look around for a cloth to put to your neck. 

You don't want to turn your back to him, considering what just happened, but you don't think he can move beyond the stretcher. You took note of the pain in his eyes while he held you. He likely doesn't have much more strength beyond that. Unless you give him a reason to. 

As you're searching, he continues. Strained. Cautious. But you can tell he is still trying to be intimidating. "I won't be going down without a fight, you know. Really you should consider saving yourself the trouble, Star."

"Well considering I have no– no intention of hurting you,"—You snatch up a towel lying on your workbench and press it to your wounds—"Then we shouldn't have any trouble at all." 

A scoff, you turn around to see that despite being essentially trapped, he's in a defensive position. Hackles raised, so to say. You take note that fins now surround his entire head, and realize that before half of them had been flattened down. 

You keep your distance, you don't want to make things worse after all. You lean back against the workbench, hand still pressed to your neck. It didn't feel too deep, though you'll likely be a bit sore you're guessing. 

"Why should I believe you? No reason to trust, trust, trust."

You shrug. "Maybe not, but you're kind of stuck with me for the time being. So, if you give me a chance, I'll prove it to you that I'm only trying to help." You lift the towel from your neck, seeing it's covered in small splotches of blood, you'll live. "You've already shown you can... dispose of me if you want to. Therefore if I'm lying you'd be able to do something about it."

The mer stares at you, you stare back. You turn around and start collecting up supplies. 

"Fine. One chance, friend." 

You face him again, bundles of medical supplies in your arms. "One is all I need."

You approach slowly, relaxed, you don't want to escalate things. Soon enough, you're kneeling beside him, examining each jagged mark with care. You'd ask what happened, but something tells you you're unlikely to get an answer. 

Each injury you come across sends another knot of concern into your stomach, but you keep outwardly calm. He's still lucid, still watching you closely, meaning the wounds shouldn't be life-threatening with the proper care. Inspection over, you set to work. 

Trying to ease the tension—and perhaps both your nerves—you explain each step of the process gently and in detail. Still defensive, you do notice the curious tilt to his head as you speak and work. 

At some point he questions you outright. 

"You're quite knowledgeable with all this aren't you?" 

You glance up from dabbing antibiotics on the tears in his orange tail fins. "I, yeah. It's what I do for a living."

"Heal others?" He questions. 

You shrug. "Animals usually, not people. Though I guess you're somewhere in between for my training." You sit back, nodding once. "Okay, you can ease into the water now, but try to keep this elevated until it soaks in a bit—"

As you speak, the power cuts, plunging you into darkness. Just as the mer—who, you don't even know the name of—is slipping into the pool. You hear a loud splash and worry the suddenness spooked him and he slipped. 

You hurriedly crawl over to the pool, scrambling for your phone flashlight, turning it on and looking up—

And finding two bright red eyes looking over at you. 

The mer's eyes were white, last you'd checked. 

The bright light causes him to hiss and flinch away, ducking under the water. Surprised yourself, you scramble back and away on your hands and feet. 

After a moment, he resurfaces. And maybe it's your eyes taking time to adjust but he looks... different to you. 

Fins flattened against his head, twisted together at the back of his head, almost forming a cap-like shape. However the more interesting change is how his colors have flipped completely. No longer a smattering of oranges and yellows, now white and blue all over. His face—originally two contrasting shades of yellow—now half white and half blue itself. 

He chuckles then, head tilting. "What's the matter, little star? Scared of the dark?"

Even his voice was different, gravely, a different pitch. It clicks to you near instantly. 

Not just one mer, a pair. 

In one body. 

How incredibly interesting.

"No, not exactly." You sit forward. Closer, curious. "Your coloring, is it a type of bioluminescence? Camouflage?" 

A slight narrow to his eyes that then disappears, replaced by cheekiness. Though it borderlined mockery if you were being honest. "Usually the first question is 'how can there be two of you?'"

"Would you answer truthfully if I asked?" You find yourself more interested than scared in that moment. Not intimidated by the mer at this point. 

Clawed fingers trace a pattern on the surface of the water. "The answer is that there isn't, two sides of the same shell. But the same shell nonetheless."

"And does the shell have a name?" You muse. 

A sharp-toothed grin. "Eclipse."

As the weeks go by, day by day, Eclipse would sometimes ask you to call them different names, depending on the time of day. Sun in the day, Moon at night. That was only after you truly got to know them, however. Both sides, and as a whole. 

It took quite a while as well. Just earning their trust in general did. You have the scratches and bites to prove it. You had meant it when you said you had no intention of harming them. But it wasn't until several close calls and bandages later that they started believing it. 

A slow, steady process. You could see it in how their gaze would shift, from condescending or wary to just suspicious to then curious, interested. How when you treated their wounds they flinched away less and less. One might even argue they started leaning into it, though that may have just been your imagination. 

The two halves each held a unique perspective towards you, you'd noticed. You could hold witty banter with the Sun, conversations long and debating and ever the more enjoyable for it. The Moon was teasing, always trying to up the game in some way. You were happy to return the friendly fire as a response. 

Gradually, bit by bit, day by day and night by night, things shifted. No longer was there an air of hostile caution present when you entered the garage. Instead, it morphed from a general amicability, to fully—somehow—affectionate. Rather rapidly as well. 

You suppose that's how you find yourself in this situation now.

You shift slightly and find the tail your legs are intertwined with curls around you tighter. Though the humidity of the day is unbearable, you find yourself to be at the perfect temperature. The mer holding you is the right level of cool, soothing any potential heat that you may have otherwise been suffering through. 

Your eyes drift open and closed, in a state of not quite awake though not asleep either. You feel incredibly lazy, but in the best way possible. You have no worries, no tasks that need done, as long as you didn't get an emergency call from the sanctuary, you could stay like this the rest of the day. 

Though, you think you wouldn't be allowed to do anything besides that either. 

Their head is buried into your neck, as content as you. A specific state of in-between you'd noticed. Not quite one side or the other. Their colors a blend, same with their eyes. Similar to how they'd appeared when they first washed up on shore. This time it was intentional you think. 

You told them you wouldn't mind sitting in the pool—the garage floor couldn't be comfortable—but they hadn't minded. They felt well enough to be able to tolerate it, they'd said. Which, at this point, was the elephant in the room. Neither of you had been able to breach it though.

Until now, that is.

"Your wounds are almost healed." You mumble into the relative quiet. 

"Mmm."

You sigh, sitting a bit more upright. "You shouldn't stay here longer than you have to."

"Mmhmm." Irritated now. 

You reach a hand up to his face, pushing gently so to create space that he has to look at you. "You don't have to go away. Come and visit me, won't you?"

He leans into your palm, then turns to press a kiss to it, trailing down until he meets you eye to eye. He pauses, eyes locked on yours. The gap between you closes, lips melding together for a short, but tender moment. 

Despite the sharp points of his teeth, the smile he wears is anything but. "Who's saying that I'll leave?"

You grin yourself, pressing forward for another kiss. And maybe another few will follow after that. 

There's certainly worse ways to spend the afternoon.

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Thank you for the lovely request @rosescarletful, as you know I enjoyed the concept of two personality fish very much :D Would love to do more with them sometime ^^

As I said will be getting caught up again slowly (I will win I WILL WIN I MUST-) be on the lookout for another post later tonight, thanks for reading!

Masterlist post is here

Tag list (if you would like added, simply say so!):

@scarletcowboy @beemyhuneybee @fishm0ther @deviouscrackers @elsajoyagent8 @luckyyyduckyyy @zenkaiankoku @jogimote @local-shrub @milosmantis @robinette-green @everlightreader @sinister-sincerely @starredeclipse @dangerva @juukai @crystalmagpie447 @mothgutz236 @lizyxml @divinit3a @amarynthian-chronicles @crystalfay @that-one-unknown-artist @rosescarletful @buzzy-bee @hazelthebat @nightriverart @mr-munchies

[wroteclassicaly]

18+

Summary: Steve is jealous, and it has some delicious consequences.

Warnings: Language, dom!Steve, jealous!Steve, possessive!Steve, references smut, slight smut, and NSFW.

A/N: Hi, everyone! Slowly tryna edge back into this writing thing. Here’s some filth! Much love to y’all! ❤️

Steve Harrington is seething. The kind of grit your teeth until they ache, fists clenching knuckle white, nails leaving their printed shapes behind in the flesh of palms - type of anger. There’s a blazing inferno clouding the mossy embers within his eyes, dilating his pupils into an intergalactic abyss. He’s worked himself up about it since he saw his former best-friend (and your high school tormenter) Tommy H, flirting with you at the video store when he came back in from his lunch break earlier in the day. It built into undeniable stormy waters on his drive home, leaving him with a clear objective: claim.

You’re expecting this, especially the moment that you hear his car door slam moments later, knowing his cool demeanor at playing it off when he saw you trying to casually brush Tommy away, was all a smoke screen. Steve isn’t upset at you, that much is clear. But you are well aware that he’s probably going to need whatever is going to take place when he gets into the apartment. He needs to be this way right now, desires to stake his claim over you. His footsteps find the decorative welcome mat and his key slides into the lock.

Fuck. You want to sing, a ping pong of sensations firing off the walls inside of you, taking dents out internal flesh, pushing onto organs.

You can feel your heartbeat in your throat, perspiration slick against your thighs, among other things. You’re already changed for an evening at home — baggy sleep shirt, a pair of Steve’s tube socks, and panties. The sound of the door closing and his jacket as it’s rushed off his body, you clasp your hands together and wait at the entryway for him. Excitement doesn’t begin to cover how you feel, adrenaline coursing through your veins, prickling you with a specific electricity. Watching Steve’s messy hair (he’s definitely been tugging on it) makes itself known first, followed by his extremely tight jeans and long sleeved navy shirt - it makes you gulp into your initial reaction.

He smells so good. That musky odor of leftover cologne hanging just beneath the sweat of him. He’s staring right back at you now, hands finding his hips, nostrils flaring, brows pinched. My god, you can barely see the color of his irises. You’re wetting your lips when he speaks.

“Find a chair and get your ass in it.”

There’s a vibrating pulse between your legs that Steve can tell when you tighten your thighs together, nodding. He smirks, waving his massive palm towards your shared living room. He’s right on you, warm, breath on your neck, that delicious sound of his hands working on the click of his button and metallic clip from his zipper. His shoes hit the floor the moment that you pull up a simple easy chair you’d had in the reading area you’ve sat aside in the corner of your living room. Steve appreciates you working a little harder for his pleasure, versus just plopping into the lazy boy (not that he’d really mind either way) You’re such a good girl for him.

He kneels as you settle, flinging his shirt off and baring that scrumptious jungle gathered along his torso, silver chain nestled at his collar bone line. He’s hard, hand already in the elastic of his underwear, petting, rewarding himself to punish you. His spare hand parts your legs with a crude wideness, enough that you double over against his mouth, his knees pressing to your own, nose nudging your cheekbone until it finds the bridge of your own nose. His breath spray is faint compared to the scent of nicotine when his mouth parts (he’s been smoking to calm himself. it’s gonna be one of those nights where you know you won’t be walking tomorrow morning without a limp - god, you can’t wait), lips then pursing back together to kiss you on your mouth’s corner, before giving into you and stealing you into an overpowering, but welcomed kiss that captures the breath from your lungs.

Let Steve have your breath. They’re all his anyways. All of you belongs to Steve Harrington.

And as he meets your glazed over, fucked out line of sight, thumbpad grazing your jaw - he knows.

[littlest-bugz]

The Collective You

[one system's brief advice about accepting the idea of the collective you]

One of the best pieces of system advice started from a tumblr post and was elaborated by my DID specialist. I can't find the original tumblr post that started it, so I'm making a little post of my own <3 Share the knowledge. and also hope that someone can link the original post lol.

When I was REALLY going through it™ with my first diagnosis w/ DID, and a lack of integration, all of my alters felt like separate individuals, some of us feeling as distanced as a coworker or a stranger altogether. We were just getting a grasp on internal communication between all of our subsystems, and it was rough. We felt so entirely differentiated that we were our own people trapped in one body. While I don't really care about what language you use, all alters in CDDs are a part of one person [there's only one body and brain]- the collective you.

So obvs, I'm scrolling tumblr like the chronically online doomscroller that I am, and I see this post that goes along the line of not knowing who you are, but knowing you are 'you', regardless of who you are [referring to alters]. And it said something like "we're all me enough to pick up our meds"- something like that. iirc it was a half light hearted, half advice post, but that was really good advice for me. I kind of internalized it after I processed it in therapy. It's actually why I have started to love parts language lately tbh.

After further processing this idea in therapy, Identity Confusion stopped mattering in the grand scheme of things. I focused less on worrying about who I was, and just focused on the fact that I'm me. Just like the post I saw- We are all me. The example of all being me enough to pick up my medications just applied, like, everywhere. Even when it came down to the smallest things- with coping with other symptoms too.

Oh? I don't like coffee right now? I guess I should switch to something else. [differentiated alters]

Oh? I have barely any drawing skills right now? Okay, really sucks but I can work on something else and come back to it later. [skill variance between alters]

Oh? I have to go to a doctor's appointment? I know I'll forget that- Gotta write a list, and put it up on the board so I remember. [day to day amnesia]

You know what happened? My dissociation got better! Not immediately or entirely, obviously, and my memory [re amnesia] still sucks, but that's part of the disorder- plus other disorders that I have. This idea of the collective you is something that I think is really beneficial to all CDD systems, especially during the mid to later stages of recovery.

I, admittedly, credit most of my healing to conversations I have had with my DID specialist. Especially since, without her, I wouldn't have been able to process this idea of the collective me further, but the conversation wouldn't have been started if I hadn't seen that post on tumblr. This was a budding concept with us due to the separation we had. It helped with integration. GRANTED... Not every alter got the memo, obviously, but It's something that I'm still working on. Of course, being me comes with the prerequisite that I am a person with DID, and that I am made up of multiple parts.

Now for the piece of advice I got from my therapist- Though it requires a certain level of knowledge of your own system, such as a list of alters and some identifying info [fav drinks, fav colors, those type of things]. Look at the list of your alters wherever it may be. Just whatever you use for logging your system members. Look for the commonalities between alters. There will be at least some commonalities.

For example; A good 45% of us like bunnies, 45% like cats, and 10% have a liking for other kinds of animals. Using this information, I can pretty much deduce that 1. the collective me loves animals and 2. the collective me likes cats and bunnies especially.

Another example; I looked through our simplyplural, which has a favorite color thing [in ours at least]. By looking through the list, I figured out 1. wow I like literally all colors- my fav color is rainbows and 2. I especially like pink and light blue.

More examples; the list.. THE LIST... I looked through it and saw that a good 90% of us like MONSTER ENERGY DRINKS- of varying flavors, but the common denominator was Ultra Strawberry Dreams, but all of us like [or tolerate] water as a preferred drink. From there I can come to the conclusion that I prefer water over anything else and that I have a problem with monster [being light hearted but I genuinely do].

I hope you get the idea I'm going for. I used this process for nearly every aspect of our collective identity, though some had to genuinely be voted on, such as our LGBTQIA+ labels [offline, we just call ourself queer, but that's.. aside the point LMAO].

Obviously, there are going to be outliers- Having DID comes with the fun [/s] aspect of alters being differentiated from each other in some capacity. Example for the monster energy one- We have a handful of alters that HATE energy drinks- even just fizzy drinks in general. There's one guy who will only drink Black Coffee and water- nothing else. He's the guy who is always hiding away our monsters in the way back of the fridge, but guess what!! He's me!! The part of me that doesn't want me to ruin my health over energy drinks. The part of me that knows I deserve better than my unhealthy habits.

Getting to know the collective you is just like learning about your system! It is not inherently different than figuring out what an alters dislikes or likes are. The idea of The Collective You shouldn't feel scary or anxiety inducing- if it is, you may want to confront those feelings with a therapist if you have access to one. Every CDD system is the collective [or, well, system] of one fragmented individual- That is a studied and objective fact. I wanted to give advice from one recovering system to another.

No, this will not work for everyone, every system is different, but I'm hoping this post finds the right audience in knowing that it's worth a shot to try this!

[moonblossom7]

Baby Daddy!Logan thoughts

Wolverine x AFAB! reader

a/n: go into all of my x-men fics n stuff with canon as a mere suggestion :) this one's pretty ok,but yk. For future reference.

contents: fluff, girl dad!Logan,a kid b4 marriage(accidental but wanted),slight angst sprinkled in,lightly suggestive in one bit but it's not full nsfw or anything

🌸 Logan didn't mean to get you pregnant and he was honestly upset when you first found out. He was happy for you,bc you wanted kids but he didn't think he deserved to be a father.

🌸 Once he decided he was sticking around (because let's be honest,there was some part of him that thought leaving so you could find someone better was the move) he's very attentive.

🌸and I'm not just talking "oh,he goes to every check up and rubs your feet" I'm talking he will hike ten miles in the snow at 2 a.m if you're craving something specific and will return with a smile on his face because yeah,that was tough but you're growing a kid,which is harder.

🌸really wanted you to have a home birth,mainly because he doesn't trust medical situations,especially if you and the baby are also mutants. (and if you still do it at the hospital,he is fucking VIGILANT. He's watching every fucking thing that happens like a hawk.)

🌸you have a girl ofc

🌸he's never really been around kids this little,so for a long time he doesn't know what to do with her.

🌸he uses Jean's Facebook to look at parenting tips(he later learns this is not the greatest source),and consequentially ends up buying a ton of stuff that your daughter is too young to even need off Marketplace (bikes,clothes meant for much older kids,rain boots,jungle gym,etc.)

🌸he hates!! Hates!! those little tutus that seem to be on every little girl onesie, he thinks the tulle is scratchy and how on earth could someone subject their baby to that?

🌸a lot of the clothes your daughter winds up wearing are pretty gender neutral and frequently thrifted or bought from small businesses. Logan says this is because modern,mainstream baby clothes are "Down right fucking hideous,who designs this shit?"

🌸he makes some of her toys. A small set of wooden blocks here, a patchy ugly teddy bear there. He just doesn't love the unnaturally bright colors and loud noises that most baby toys come with,plus,he's got a lot of affection he doesn't know what to do with.

🌸hates late night diaper changes with a passion. He only just started sleeping without nightmares,and the baby won't even let him get a full 8 hours?? He takes all of them though,because "you do the more important stuff"

🌸big fan of the way your appearance changed,btw. I personally think he's always been the type to find stretch marks and some squish attractive,but the fact that these are from you growing his little girl makes it all the more beautiful.

🌸he is not,however,a fan of having to wait until you're healed up for bedroom stuff. He can do it, he's not an animal,but you're just so fucking gorgeous and he's so fucking happy. But,your health comes first, and he's not so stupid as to think he knows better than you on this.

🌸he doesn't quit smoking,but does at least start going outside and wearing a different jacket when he does it. He always washes his hands and face after he's done before he does anything near the baby.

🌸since this is *my* personal x-men canon, we're going to say that Laura is around the mansion somewhere and is not overly hyped about the baby sister. She's a little possessive over her dad,as some little girls are. (She'll get over it soon,especially once the baby is old enough to play with)

🌸Logan takes the baby on adventures once she's old enough to not get sick over everything. He'll pack a bag and disappear with Laura and the baby for a few hours,with very little explanation, and come back with a snoring toddler and a 10 year old covered in mud.

🌸he's happy that this kid has his mutation in it's organic form,instead of being injected with metal. however,it does make her stick out a bit visually. (she begins to display it at around age 11,with claws that aren't super sharp at all compared to Logan and Laura)

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

ok so that's it lolsies. Lmk if you want anything else with this idea or any specific scenarios.

[jagalart]

The way you color is absolutely gorgeous! All of those pencil lines bring so much character to each drawing. I'm sorry if you've answered this before but on average how long does it take you to work on a piece? I feel like those lines would take a while; is it more meditative to do it? Or do you use shortcuts sometimes?

Thank you so much! I must say it really depends, some of these take a long time, and since I'm only able to focus on one piece for a little while before I have to switch to another sometimes it takes me weeks, even months to return to the same piece! But most of my works are completed within 2-10 hours, it gets to 1-20 if we put the simplest and the most complicated ones into the equation. If the lines are simple and only digital, like in my portraits - the whole piece doesn't take long, for example, this one is around 2 hours - but when a traditional, pencil sketch and more detailed composition is involved it makes the process a lot slower.

Especially since printing my initial, digital sketch, then drawing traditonally on top of it, then scanning and editing it adds a lot of time to the process too. Plus my research process for bigger pieces is always long, sometimes it may take me even a few hours to find the right photo references and ideas! It's hard to say without measuring it directly, but I'd say this one took me around 10 hours if we count all of these. Just the research and initial sketching alone took me forever, ironically the coloring went much smoother from there. :D

As for shortcuts, I reuse some of my minor plant elements for different pieces sometimes! But don't tell anyone. XD (I line color and render them again anyways, I just reuse the initial sketch sometimes :'D)

[crumblekitten]

smoke sessions

Warnings: fluff, kissing, smoking, sexual references, corny teenagers

Luke castellan x Dionysus!fem!reader

word count: 2k

AO3 post link: here

I do not give permission for my work to be uploaded or posted on other sites without proper credit.

It was already late at night when you heard a gentle knock on the window next to your bed. Luke was standing there with a smile, mouthing, “hey, let me in!”

He knew there’d be punishments awaiting for him if Mr. D were to ever find out that he escaped Cabin Eleven just to crawl into yours. But how could he deny a chance to be with his love? it takes you about a minute to open the window Luke climbs through and quietly closes the window as soon as he’s inside. He slowly walks towards the bed and chuckles while taking a look around the cabin.

“Y’know, I still think it’s unfair that the children of Dionysus are the ones with their own rooms in their cabin. I mean, I have to share mine with a butt-load of half siblings…” he mumbled in a slightly sarcastic tone as he made it to your bed. “Well my dad is camp director and never has more then about 4 kids at any given time” Luke laid down on the bed, resting his head on your lap and looking up at you with a smile. He put his hands behind his head and looked at the ceiling. “I mean, I guess you’re right.” He chuckled before looking back up at you.

“So, what’re you doing up so late?” Luke questions You pull out a box from under your bed, it’s covered in stickers Luke raises a curious eyebrow at the box that you pulled from under the bed after seeing all of the colorful stickers on it. He sits up and looks at you, a slight look of curiosity on his face as he asks.

“What’s in the box?” “All the shit I need to hide from my dad or siblings” Luke chuckles in amusement and raises an eyebrow at you, looking at the box in your hands with curiosity, before giving you a cheeky smile.

“Oh, really? And what’s in there that your siblings and daddy dearest can’t see?” You open the box and there’s a few condoms, weed and lighters “that” Luke’s eyes widened a bit looking at the box, a small smirk formed on his face at the contents within it. He chuckled and looked back up at you, a cheeky expression on his face.

“Oh ho! I can see why you have to hide all of that from your family, especially your dad. He’d rip me apart if he knew that I’d done anything with you…” Luke reaches into the box and jokingly took one of the condoms and held it up between his fingers, looking at it and chuckling.

“You certainly came prepared, didn’t you?” “With you I never can be too careful” Luke couldn’t hold back a small laugh at the response. He tossed the condom he was holding back into the box. “True, I mean I always bring the ‘necessities’ when sneaking out here in the middle of the night just to see a certain pretty girl.” “And what would those be?” Luke looked up at you, his face still holding his cheeky smile. He leaned a bit closer to you as he replied. “Why, I bring myself, obviously!”

He chuckled before shaking his head in amusement. “But I guess I also bring these things…” he said as he pulled a bag out of the pocket in his sweatpants and places it on the bed. The small bag is filled with the typical ‘necessities’ of a person who sneaks out. Things like snacks, cigarettes, a lighter, some cash and a small flask of some other liquid. “Lube? Seriously?” Luke’s cheeks turn a shade of red as you mention that particular item, causing him to let out a small chuckle of embarrassment before speaking. “I- well, what? Gotta be prepared for anything, don’t I?” “Fucken idiot” you flick his forehead Luke lets out a small cry and scowls at you before rubbing his forehead, an irritated look on his face. “Ow! Hey! Watch it, woman! I’m just being responsible!” “Woman? Adress me with respect you peasant”

Luke rolls his eyes in response to that snarky comment and laughs a little. “Ok, smartass. It’s not my fault that you’re so… so…” Luke can’t think of a come back, so he just sticks his tongue out at you in a snarky way. You laugh Luke hears you laugh, and even though he’s a bit annoyed with your comment, he can’t help but smile a little at your laugh. He playfully pushes you away from him. “Yeah, laugh it out, princess.”

“You really couldn’t think of a comeback huh?” Luke playfully rolls his eyes and crosses his arms, looking at you with a feigned irritated expression. He mumbles in a half sarcastic way. “No, I couldn’t. You just… you’re so annoying… it’s exhausting!” You give him a kiss on the forehead where you had flicked him “better?” Luke’s face blushes a soft shade of pink as your lips touch his head. He looks at you with a slight smile, his irritation lessening. “Yeah, I feel better now, I’ll give you that, but I’ll still have to remind you not to flick me next time.” You look back to the bag “I didn’t know you smoked cigarettes?” At the mention of cigarettes, Luke’s smile falters a little bit. He glances at the bag as he hesitantly answers. “I- well… I don’t really smoke that often… I just kinda- have it in case I need one or something… It’s just a stress reliever, really…”

“Luke. I do weed daily I don’t care that you smoke” Luke lets out a small sigh of relief and shrugs a little bit. “Oh, well yeah, I know that… I just- I don’t know, I guess I thought you’d be mad or something… I don’t know… I don’t usually have one unless I’m really stressed or I’ve been dealing with a whole lot of bullshit…” “Your kids been putting you through it?” Luke rolls his eyes and groans “Ugh, you don’t even know the half of it! I’ve been dealing with those little assholes and all the stupid stuff they like to do. I swear, I almost gave up on those shits on more than just one occasion this week…” you laugh Luke rolls his eyes again but is amused by your laughing. A half-smile comes onto his face as he looks at you. “Oh, you think this is funny, huh? Oh, you just wait. It’ll be you who has to deal with those dumbasses one day. Don’t come crying to me when a few of them push your buttons a bit too much.”

“Puh-lease there’s a very small chase that I of all people get a new camper” Luke raises an eyebrow at that. He lets out an amused scoff and asks you a question. “Oh, really? How are you so sure of that? Don’t think Daddy director will give you a little camper every once in awhile?” “He’s been stuck here for like ten years at this point.” Luke chuckles and shakes his head in slight amusement. He’d honestly lost track of how long Mr. D has been stuck here. “Damn, it’s really been that long… It’s been so long now that I honestly stopped counting how many years it’s been… but still! I wouldn’t think your dad and the Fates would spare you from having a little shit-head for a sibling in the future…” “The future is not my priority” Luke lets out a small scoff and gives you an amused smile. “Oh yeah? What is your priority then, missy?” “Getting high, and uh you I guess”

Luke chuckles at the first reply, but blushes a little at the last one. A slight smile appears on his face as he looks at you and scoffs again. “Yeah, I figured I’d be pretty high on your priority list, but damn, drugs before me?” “Drugs before hoes bro” Luke lets out a laugh and rolls his eyes at your comment. “Man, that feels like betrayal. You’re seriously placing some weed before me. I’m heartbroken, just devastated.” He jokingly pouts in a dramatic tone, putting his hand on his forehead and all. “Hey im supposed to be the dramatic one here”

Luke smirks and puts his hands up in surrender. “Ok, ok, ok… you win, princess. You’re the queen of theatrics and drama and I’m just a mere commoner. Happy now?” “Very” you grab one of the joints and a lighter Luke raises an eyebrow at the joint in your hands and lets out a small scoff. “Are you seriously gonna have a smoke right now? It’s like the middle of the night, not many people are awake at this point, you know. Unless you’re just gonna blow it out the window or somethin’.” He says with a slight chuckle.

“One good thing about having your own room is that you can hotbox it” you get up and open a window and go back to the bed Luke chuckles at your comment and looks at you with amused curiosity. He watches silently as you open the window and go back to the bed. “Fair enough, just make sure you don’t piss of any nearby harpies. They’d probably have a fit if they smell it coming out the window.” “And they also have special instructions to leave me and my brothers alone” Luke lets out a small huff, slightly baffled by your comment as he watches you get comfortable on the bed. “Seriously? They have ‘special instructions’ to leave you alone? What have you been doing to get that?”

“Be the camp directors kid” Luke chuckles and rolls his eyes again, shaking his head in slight amusement. “Yeah, that makes sense. But are you at least gonna share a bit of that with your boyfriend?” “Obviously” you light the joint and take a drag Luke smiles as he watches you light the joint and take a drag from it. He scoots a little closer to you, still laying in your lap, and watches you exhale the smoke. “Ah, how very kind of you, love.” He jokingly mutters before reaching his hand out for the joint. You hand it too him “careful this is some strong shit”

Luke scoffs and takes the joint from you. “Oh please, I think I can handle your strong stuff, princess. You think I’m a wimp who can’t handle a bit of strong weed?” Luke takes a longer drag from the joint and holds the smoke in his lungs for as long as he can before pulling the joint away and exhaling the large gray smoke cloud into the air “Oh ho… yeah, you weren’t kidding. Jesus Christ…” Luke hands the joint back to you and tries to catch his breath. His head is already beginning to feel fuzzy “God, that’s strong. It’s good stuff, but definitely strong as hell…”

“Warned you” Luke rolls his eyes and gives you a sarcastic, annoyed look. “Yes, yes, I know, I know, I get it. You warned me. But I didn’t think it was gonna be that strong! I feel like my mind’s already starting to float a little…” you take another hit holding the smoke in your lungs until you look up and exhale it through your nose Luke watches as you take another hit and blow the smoke out your nose. A look of awe and slight amusement comes onto his face at the sight. “Damn… you know, you look really hot when you do that…” “Wanna kiss?” You say it playfully and add a lisp to the ‘kiss’ Luke can’t help but let out a laugh at your slightly lisped question and jokingly leans forward and responds in a mocking tone. “Ooohhh, do I want a kiss? Obviously I want a kiss! Come on, pucker up those pretty lips of yours!”

You burst out laughing and cover your face with the hand that’s not holding the joint Luke laughs along with you before gently grabbing your wrists and holding them to uncover your face. He scoots closer and smiles down at you. “There’s those beautiful eyes of yours. Now gimme a kiss, you tease.” You lean down to kiss him Luke smirks and meets your lips and kisses you back. He reaches up and takes the joint from you and places it down on the nightstand before bringing his hand back up to your face, cupping your cheek. Luke continues to kiss you a little longer before slowly pulling away and lying his head back down in your lap, looking up at you. “Damn… I swear your kisses are just as good as the strongest weed… and that’s saying something…” Luke lets out a small sigh while looking up at you, a small, soft smile on his still slightly fuzzy face. He continues to hold your cheek and uses his thumb to gently caress your cheekbone. “God, you’re beautiful…” “I know”.

[ask-the-pioneer]

Hello and welcome to @ask-the-pioneer! This is a scripted ask blog dedicated to a slugcat OC of mine called Marbles (she/her), titled the Pioneer. She is a re-interpretation of Artificer’s blue slugpup, set in a AU where the pup survives, grows up, and receives a name. The main story begins some short time after the end of Artificer’s campaign. At that point in time Marbles is already a young adult (early 20s in human years). She parts ways with Hunter - her mentor - and ventures out to seek the knowledge contained within the pearls that she was always captivated by.

This blog is run by @kalivasquez (@kalivasquezart). Keep in mind I’m not a native English speaker. There may be spelling errors or weirdly constructed sentences at times. This is my first ask-blog ever so idk what I’m doing but I’m trying my best 👍

CONTENT WARNING: This blog has content rating of +18 due to potential sensitive themes: mental trauma, depictions of violence, suicidal ideation, blood and gore, or other graphic imagery that may be uncomfortable, scarring or otherwise triggering to witness. Viewer discretion is advised. Posts containing mild themes will be tagged appropriately, while posts showing heavy themes will have "mature" filter applied to them. Please be aware that all the content shared on this blog is intended for an adult audience!

More info below the cut, including blog rules. Please read it!

Blog Rules 📜

Last update: 10th of October, 2024

By default you address the main character - Marbles, aka the Pioneer - in your asks. If you wish to inquire me directly (as an author of this blog), please include “[OOC]” at the beginning, or otherwise indicate that the message is directed at me and not the character.

Asks are answered in-character. Sometimes the character may react to your ask in a seemingly negative way. Please keep in mind that it is done from their point of view, and it does not imply that I (the author) personally reacted badly to your message.

I appreciate all the asks that I receive. However, I reserve the right to not answer some of them, at my discretion. It is not guaranteed that you receive a response. Still, I’ll try my best to answer as many messages as I can.

Be aware that some asks I receive may be skipped over, especially ones that are short and vague, in favour of more complex asks that help me push the plot of this AU forward. This is also relevant for asks that refer to the same subject (duplicates).

Please be tactful! Asks that are inappropriate or confusing in their intent (like spam, baits, asks containing slurs) will be deleted. Sorry!

Do not send me asks via direct messages (DMs)! I keep my DMs open in case someone needs to contact me for other reasons, like incorrect tagging or important offsite matters. If you send me a DM meant to be answered like an ask, your message will be ignored and deleted.

Please do not repost my art on to your own social media accounts. Honestly, don't. Anyone can see this blog without needing to log in or register on tumblr anyway.

More rules may be added later. Please check this section again periodically.

General Character Info ℹ️

As of now, this ask-blog has only one acting character - Marbles the slugcat, aka the Pioneer.

Name (given): Mirmyntasseth, Eight Marbles Cast in Stone

Title (given): the Pioneer

Nickname: Blue (for family), Marbles (for friends, after being named by an iterator)

Pronouns: she/her

Age: young adult (very early 20’s in human years)

Personality: energetic, curious, savvy, humorous, short-tempered, resilient, drive, a little naive and too trusting, exhibits mild case of abandoned child syndrome

Specific traits:

good at finding pearls (she loves them, goes about as crazy for them as scavs) and other trinkets,

knows martial arts, can incapacitate enemies by hitting their pressure points,

can craft explosive spears and grenades - they do less damage, but stun for longer; crafted explosives have deep orange color,

already has a mark of communication, granted by NSH,

Tools:

Marbles is often seen wearing a light colored “sling bag” on her back, where she keeps her pearls and other items,

at a muuuuuuch later point in time, she receives a gift from a kind interator - her very own citizen ID drone; the drone can read from pearls and translate slugcat speech into other languages.

Current reference sheet:

For more in-dept info and drawings/references of the character, please visit Marbles' ToyHouse page.

AU Timeline ⏱️

the story of Pioneer takes place some years after the end of Artificer's campaign, and begins at the same time as Hunter's campaign in-game

this AU assumes the following timeline for slugcat campaigns: Spearmaster -> Artificer -> Hunter -> Gourmand -> Survivor -> Monk -> Rivulet -> Saint,

Artificer/Hunter/Gourmand campaigns happen close together, with Hunter/Gourmand overlapping slightly; all three scugs are roughly the same age, with Arti being the oldest (early 40s), and Hunter the youngest (39),

Saint and Monk are still slugpups by the time the story of Pioneer beings,

Spearmaster is unlikely to be present in this AU as it is assumed that over 432 cycles have passed, meaning they are no longer alive,

Rivulet is unlikely to be present in this AU as here their campaign is assumed to have taken place *much *later in the future,

Saint is thought to be stuck in a time loop, and *may *appear in this AU.

AU Setting 📝

Pioneer’s Backstory (before the events described in this ask blog):

Marbles/Blue (the Pioneer) was born in the Garbage Wastes area, raised by a single mother (Artificer); the other parent remains unknown,

she had a sibling (who was also the runt of the litter) - a brother named Bryn, the green slugpup; the two were fraternal twins,

she got separated from the rest of her family in a scav toll incident,

was not killed, but abducted instead by the scavenger toll tribe, brought into their local shelter just before the rain started,

initially assumed to have been taken in as a fodder in case of predator attack,

in the end she has earned her keep when she learned how to make grenades and explosive spears, turning herself into a valuable asset for the tribe,

was treated fairly well, but never truly incorporated into the local scavenger community,

had stayed with the tribe for many cycles, learning how to fight and survive, but also how to look for valuables (mainly pearls) and haggle with other tribes,

could probably have run away, but she held on to hope that mom would come back for her,

whenever she got “lost”, the tribe would look for her to bring her back,

after one of her short solo expeditions, she came back to the camp only to find out the entire scav tribe has been wiped out,

ran away and been wandering aimlessly for a while, eventualy stumbling upon Hunter who adopted her, took back to NSH's superstructure, and underwent training alongside him (under NSH’s supervision),

promised to accompany Hunter during his important mission, but had to suddenly part ways due to unfortunate circumstances (just before the beginning of Hunter’s campaign).

Post Tagging 🏷️

I use the following tags:

#rain world, #rain world oc, #rain world au - default tags added to all answered asks (unless OOC),

#rain world spoilers - is included in posts that may spoil RW lore, for example: when answers hint to the conclusion of Artificer’s campaign,

#rw - rain world-specific characters that are present in a post, such as: “#rw hunter” or “rw five pebbles”; i will try to use the full name(s) intead of abbreviations,

#au lore - posts that contain important worldbuilding information for my AU,

#ooc- out of character posts, or anything else that doesn’t fall under “rain world” umbrella,

(more tags will be added to this section once I actually start posting stuff)

I also tag sensitive content with appropriate tags like #tw [trigger], if shown.

Text Key 💬

Most dialogue takes form of narrated drawings, where Marbles speaks in her own voice. The speeches are a part of the drawings themselves.

However, if a post contains additional text, the following key is used:

Narration

The road was long and arduous, and she was glad to have finally found a shelter.

Thoughts

This place is full of scavengers, I should be able to trade those pearls for some food.

“Speaking”

“How come you have not seen a vulture before? Climb up to Sky Islands, they are everywhere!”

//OOC

// more art coming soon woohoo!

Credits 📑

image in the blog's header belongs to Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash

Yoŋasabi script (slugcat language, original conlang) in the top banner by @opashoo

all the other drawings posted on this blog were made by me, unless stated otherwise

[redfeatheredreptile]

Here's my piece for @creatingblackcharacters' Black History Month Challenge! She's one of my sci-fi story's main OCs, Zola! (That's why she's Afro-Polaran, Polara 5 is her home planet) I had a ton of fun working on this, and I really learned a lot! But, of course, let me know if there's anything I can improve on with how I depicted her.

(copied from the replies)

Ice's question: What do you want to tell your Black viewers, through this character or the effort you put into her?

A: Thank you for asking! I’ve seen this come up repeatedly in my readings on Black women: the general stigma and disapproval around Black girls and women being feminine or girly, especially in a ‘loud’ way— without being sexualized. With Zola I really wanted to show that she loves who she is; fashionable, pink and cute things and all, while still enjoying her Blackness as well, which I tried to show with her hair and her accessories. I would love it if she inspires women (or anyone Black!) to express themselves the way that feels good, whether it’s girly or not.

More info under the cut!

I challenged myself to listen to only Black artists while working on this piece, and to read poems by Black women and find ones I think fit Zola. It's been good to broaden my music horizons. My 'Black Artists' playlist is still growing. Things I learned:

1) Don't blindly color-pick for skin tone, especially dark ones. The ones I got were suuper washed-out. I changed her skin colors maybe 4 or 5 times just to get it right =.=; I'm still learning, so I hope I didn't overcorrect and over-saturate her. I went back and re-read lessons 3 and 4 and that helped me figure out what shade I actually wanted for her. If I were to draw her again, I would change the lighting to something better, too. 2) Black hairstyles are FUN to draw! I've only drawn a few specific ones from reference so far but they really force me to think about the shape and texture of the hair, how light bounces off it, etc. I also like doing curvy lines, detail, and drawing hair in general, so it was a treat. I learned a lot from the lessons on Black hair types and styles, as soon as I learned about twists and looked at the different styles for them I knew it would be Zola's favorite. I need to draw her in a twist-out, next!

3) For writing them, reading Ice's lessons helped a lot too! She's still not had much time yet in the story (she gets introduced later) but it helped me develop what kind of character I actually want her to be. She got more of a sensitive side rather than a generic 'strong woman'TM. She's still very confident and self-assured, but I've planned moments in the story where she doesn't have to be and gets to be emotionally vulnerable. She's also got a larger role in the story that involves her backstory and her family, and not just helping the other members of the 'party'. Hope to flesh her out a lot more as I continue writing!

Misc: Her 'face claim' is technically Mirakela Love, but between making her fatter than the model and my cartoony style I don't think it ended up looking much like her. Still helped to have reference, though. The color scheme for her outfit is meant to evoke the Lesbian flag. She gay and proud. Zola's meant to be both girly and fashionable, but I'm not a super fashionable person, so I just did my best and combined some outfits I liked. Then I added Jinx-style boots for funsies. Do hoops go with the rest of it? I don't know!

[im-not-a-ghost]

Who is your soulmate/twin flame? - Pick a Bangchan aesthetic edition

Twin flame is usually a term used to designate a specific type of soul bond/ soul contract between two individuals. They are sometimes refered to as « a single soul coming from the same egg » that got seperated before being incarnated. Each bearing different wounds, they navigate lifetimes to hopefully heal and reunite, becoming one again. Twin flames could be what you could say is Plato’s definition of soulmates. In modern times, the term soulmate refers to two distinct souls that have shared many lifetimes together and are meant to cross paths again in this lifetime to teach each other lessons and help each other resolve karma. Whether we are referring to one or another, both have in common a deep sense of love and connection. Whether you enquire about a twin flame or a soulmate, know that they aren’t necessarily a romantic partner. They could be of any gender. They might not be incarnated yet. They could be a child, an adult, a parent, a friend, a coworker. If you proceed with this reading, you should step in it with an open heart and mind. Take only what resonates and leave doubt at the gate. As you read, you may find that the person I’m describing sounds like you. That is because soulmates/TF tend to mirror one another. If it doesn’t feel like anything that makes sense to you, then maybe this reading held no messages for you today. Yours truly,

Just a ghost.

Group 1 - Rocky Chan🤘 Channeled song : BTBT from B.I feat Soulja boy & DeVita

Tarot : 8 of wands, Queen of swords, ace of swords, 9 of wands, 2 of cups, The Fool

Oracle cards : Ametrine - Make your big dreams your big life, Shiva Lingam - Go all in on your essence, 3 Dolphin - Socialize and celebrate life, play

Messages from Merlin :

Mandragora spell - Be the master of your beliefs : Your fears and anxiety are the product of your beliefs. Stop ruminating, for none of it is meant to happen. Your beliefs shape your reality so transform them to make them reflect your wishes and thus materialize them.

Red dragon & white dragon - Shed light onto your shadow : Shed light onto your inner conflicts. By accepting your mistakes and fears with humility, you’ll allow your trust and harmony to take back their rightful place in your realm. Don’t hesitate to apologize to and forgive yourself.

Whyvern spell - Choose consciously : Before you give in to temptation and follow a thought, a project or a person, take the time to learn more about them. Listen to your reason and intuition in order to avoid delusions. You can then peacefully envision what’s next.

Significant signs : Pisces, Gemini, Scorpio, Cancer, Sagittarius, numbers 8 1 9 2 0 3, letters F P A S L , colors like pastel pink / purple / ocean blue /red, dolphins, snakes, white dogs

Key words : idealist, hopeless romantic, Peter Pan syndrom, mommy issues, creative, connection, playfulness, emotional immaturity, soft hearted, touch starved, loyalty, inner child healing

This reading is going to be quite lengthy so bear with me. Grab a pen and a notebook if you wish. This person feels rather masculine. They are a soulmate of yours without a doubt. In terms of looks and general information, they have rather wavy hair and a lean body. They’re a swimmer or they enjoy any kind of activity related to water, like fishing or diving. They have tanned skin. They probably have kind of a surfer vibe. They live near an important body of water or they want to live near water. They likely have clear and shiny eyes, big doe eyes and kind of a lost puppy look. Their style feels pretty flowy and laid back. Probably casual most of the time. They feel gender fluid. They could identify as being bisexual. They are likely younger than you. If so, they are only a few years younger. You might want to check group 2 as well if you hesitated between the two groups. They could like painting as well, especially water coloring.

This person is a dreamer. Eternally dissatisfied with life, they long for more. They seek for thrilling and exhilarating sensations to make them feel alive. They are carefree, playful, innocent in many ways. It’s like they never had the time and space to really grow, to be a child with childlike occupations and worries. They had to grow up and be responsible too quickly too soon, probably because they were the eldest of their siblings or because they had to take care of an ill relative. They are an idealist. They tend to be very harsh on themselves, they struggle with the feeling of being good enough. They are the people pleaser, the mom friend, the psychologist, the cutie bestie of the group that gives so much but only gets so little in return and would never say a thing about it because they think they don’t deserve to demand anything. They are the social butterfly, the « I have so many friends » that they barely know type. They crave attention, they crave love. They love the idea of love. They are often in their little bubble, wishfully thinking about life and people. They are probably the type that wonders where in the world their soulmate is and WTF they are doing. They idealize love. Probably because they’ve never really been in love. They are incredibly intuitive and sensitive, caring and lovable. They like to make people feel good, to show love through acts of service and affirmations. They are all over the place. They are so excited by life and what it has to offer. They are an over thinker. They are pretty communicative. Though they are innocent and naive, they know pretty well what they want. They don’t hesitate to cut people off when needed. They have a lot of responsibilities on their shoulders. The concept of love and being in relationships is pretty new to them. They lack experience in the matters of the heart. They are a wanderer. They like to travel and explore places but also mindsets and people. This person has the potential to astral travel. They have very vivid dreams and nightmares. Intimacy scares the shit out of them but they crave it just as much as they dread it. This person wants to have children. They love children, love the idea of a big family. Since this person is so creative and dreamy and they have the Play card, they could very well be an artist or someone that has a meaningful presence online. They work in the entertainment industry in some way, shape or form. They tend to burn themselves out. They lack patience sometimes. They might struggle with ADHD or any other form of neurodivergence. They could be on the spectrum. This person’s purpose in life is to bring healing by alleviating the weight of other souls. Hence the entertainment thing. They are meant to distract people from their struggles and shadows so that they can appreciate their existence to a bare minimum and breathe a little. They could enjoy working with kids specifically. Being a teacher or a social worker could also be a thing they are into. They like to share and evolve in groups. Because they struggle with finding a sense of belonging. They feel sometimes like they are not from this earth and something more awaits them. Especially if they are on the spectrums (LGBTQIA+, Autism and so on). It can be hard for them to relate to other people or read the atmosphere in social settings. Being the comic relief of the group helps them deal with the stress that generates. They often wear masks to be liked by other people which gets pretty tiring. Hence they have no energy left to tend to themselves which is why they look for connections where they can rely on their partner without asking for or worrying about anything. They like to be pampered and praised, especially in bed.

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Group 2 - Smiley Chan 😄

Channeled song : You can’t hold my heart from Monsta X Significant signs : Scorpio, Leo, Sagittarius, Gemini, Libra, Taurus, letters S L J P B K, snakes, ravens, numbers 37 19 9 6 11, colors like pastel green / sandy grey / soft blues

Tarot cards : Queen of wands, The Sun, 9 of wands, The Lovers, Page of swords, Justice Oracle cards : The Pillar, 37 Candy Basslet rx - Know your worth, Shungite - Get real with your truth, Bloodstone - Power up your vitals

Messages from Merlin The Wizard :

The 9 Guardians of Avalon - Ask and you shall receive : They guard the order of all things. They ensure the threads of fate twist and twine as they should and at the right time. Be sincere about what you wish for and they shall answer in their own way. Pay attention!

Guinevra Queen of Arthur - There is no King without a Queen : you need the qualities of both masculine and feminine. Combine your thinking with your sensitivity and creativity to your decision making skills and influence. It is within this fair and balanced union that fruitful projects can be birthed.

Tuatha Dé Danann - Message from the silent people : We became Sidhes, people from the underground of the earth we seek to protect. Faes and divine beings, our magic is powerful. Come meet us in the forest, by a lake or a river. Seek our help in the form of a simple prayer and we shall know how to comfort you.

Key words : daddy issues, ambition, balance, communication, spirituality, intensity, depth, grounding, self confidence, self worth, anger issues

There is a lot to cover here and this is going to be a lengthy reading so bear with me. Feel free to take notes, make your own research if you feel called to especially when it comes to the crystals mentioned. So first of all, I want to say that this person’s energy feels like it’s currently in it’s feminine era. Though this person is very balanced in general they are indulging more into their feminine side. They could have long hair and rather tanned skin. They like going outdoors, bathing into the sun, going for walks or running. They are athletic and pretty active. The reason I am saying this is because all of the tarot cards we have here are illustrated with very feminine characters. Now this person is very much owning their power and doing their best to unapologetically be themselves. In the past, they struggled with their body image and sense of self but it seems like they are coming to terms with that. They have strong boundaries and there’s a depth to them that could really trigger/scare people, including you. This person has been through so much they can’t be bothered anymore. They don’t have time for mind games, petty lies and arguments. They want to be treated with respect and are willing to do the same so long as you don’t cross them. They are very much down to earth and simple in their functioning : all or nothing type of mentality, be good to me and I’ll be great to you, stab me and I’ll bring hell upon your head. They don’t forgive and forget easily and could hold grudges. This person values honesty, fairness, integrity. They have a strong moral compass and look for people who can match their intensity. They are cerebral. They like to think, to imagine, to create. They have the energy and mentality of a leader, a pioneer, someone that people look up to because they pave the way in a very unique manner. This person really stands out from the crowds. They tend to burden and pressure themselves because they hold themselves in high regard. This is due to their upbringing. They were raised to be the man of the house, regardless of their gender. I have a gut feeling they could identify themselves as genderfluid. They value love and connections, loyalty and compassion. They give their all in relationships and are very protective of the people they love. They are very sensual, kinky even. This person is likely to be a potential romantic partner, whether you know them already or not. They are definitely not a child, though they can sometimes harbor the energy of one. They are bratty and stubborn AF. They get under people’s skin easily whether for good or bad reasons. They elicit strong reactions from people because their vibrations are beyond anything people can fathom.

Sometimes they overextend themselves. They like to give and be of help to others. People tend to feed off of their light like leeches. They could attract a lot of narcissistic people, naysayers and haters just by breathing. This person’s job in this lifetime is solely to trigger people and shake their dusty and sterile belief systems. Which is probably what they’re also meant to do in your life. Honestly, this feels like a twin flame connection. If you were ever wondering if you had one, now I guess you know. If we get more detailed about their looks and general information about them, I’d say they’re pretty curvy. They kinda set the usual standards of beauty off. This person was never meant to fit into a box. They’re their own goddam category. Very very strong energy here. They’re the type of person that maybe wouldn’t match the traditional beautiful/pretty girl/boy stereotype but instead would look magnificent because of what they radiate. Their morals and ideals are their beauty. They’re beautiful because of the way they think, the way they treat people with equity, the way they are deep down when no one is looking. They have unconventional interests or an unconventional way of going about common interests. Their eyes could be what draws you in. Other than that, their voice can be pretty addictive. Their whole being is addictive actually. They are likely to be a foreigner or someone that was raised with a different culture than yours. This person likes to play with their appearance and the way they present themselves. Their fashion style can vary depending on their mood.

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Group 3 - Dreamy Chan Channeled song : My Oasis from Sam Smith feat Burna Boy

Tarot cards : 5 of pentacles rx, knight of pentacles, 2 of cups, 6 of pentacles, 7 of pentacles, king of cups Oracle cards : Ascension, Labradorite - Protect your magic, Pyrite - call on your core power, 15 Clownfish spirit - Protect your home, 43 Koi fish spirit - Just for fun

Possible signs : Pisces, Taurus, Scorpio, colors like soft greens and yellows, baby blue, cows and bulls, white dogs, letters A L P K C

Messages from Merlin The Wizard :

Mordred's betrayals - Don't let anger be your master : your anger isn't a good advisor. Shout, write, dance, talk about your suffering to let go of it but don't let it dictate the next chapter of your story. Whatever struggles you face, stay calm, transmute your anger and then you shall know how to deal with it and find solutions.

Merlin crazy in love - What are you ready to let go of? : To choose is to sacrifice realities that could have been. With each decision, you create your story by giving up on other possibilities. If you are wondering what to do, ask yourself what you would like to experience and what you are ready to let go of in order to get there.

Shadow magic - Transmute fear into strength : It is there, lingering in the shadows. Your fear. It doesn't know how much of a strength in can be instead of weakness. Understand your fear and challenge yourself to be stronger than it. Use it as a fuel to improve and have twice as many reasons to be proud of yourself.

Key words : caring, friends to lovers trope, morning calls and text, feeling lost and helpless, laidback, no strings attached, humanitarian work, anger issues, trust issues

This person is a soulmate of yours. They feel both masculine and femine. Their energy is pretty balanced and comforting. They are likely older than you. They have a look and a body type that's pretty common. Not too fit but not that bad either. They kinda blend in the crowd. You wouldn't notice them unless they wanted you to. They likely have long brown/black hair and tanned skin. But that's just a detail. I heard their appearance doesn't matter, they focus more on the soul. They think they're not pretty is what it is about. They are prettier than they think. But more than anything, they want to be known and loved for who they are deep in their core. When it comes to jobs or interests, this person could do something that inspires people. This is very general and can match a lot of jobs and activities. They like to raise awareness and learn from other people, so humanitarian work seems relevant. Artist could also be a possibility. This person is appreciated in their community for their strong values, their gentle side and work ethic. They never judge anyone or look down on people. They are very giving and patient, understanding. They know what it's like to be afraid or struggle. They've known pain on so many levels that at this point they have a black belt in life struggles. I feel like they want to protect people from the shitty sides of life. They want to help people avoid going through the struggles they faced when they were young. Like, let's say this person is queer and had a very hard time being themselves without facing backlash from other people, now that they've come so far they want to advocate for queer rights and help people that may be going through the same experience. Or if this person was abused, now that they've done their healing they want to help victims of abuse. This person has a lot of empathy and understanding of human condition. They are pretty down to earth and realistic. They like routines and patterns. They either work a nine to five or if they don't, they make sure they always do the same things : get their coffee first, set their equipment and tools, check their emails and notifications then get to work. Get a coffee on their way back, wash when they're home, check their mails again, work some more, overthink. Repeat. They strive for more. They long for more than the life they're experiencing right now. They're going through an awakening. This person had been neglecting the spiritual realm. They were only focusing on the material aspects of life. Concepts of souls or connections that went beyond distance and matter didn't resonate with them up until now. They recently had to let go of something that was important to them. Their life has been filled with sacrifice. This person would let opportunities pass, out of humility or out of love for others. They would put other people's needs first, no matter how much pain they were in. But the scales tipped when someone betrayed them or something felt very unfair to them. Like they were screwed over. This person lost confidence because of this and went through a very dark time in their life. They have struggled with depression and anxiety. They've had health issues, their abundance was affected by this situation. They could have lost a lot of money or important business partners, for instance. They could have lost their job or home or even their family. This person is now at a place in their life where they're back on track. They've worked on themselves, fought to regain control over their life and create a reality they could be proud of. Their finances are going well, they somewhat feel fulfilled but in the back of their mind it's like something's missing. They long for connection and attention. Something genuine and light hearted. I think this person has started to date. Or at least, they're open to the idea.