#I feel really bad for her under these comment sections though

[witchlingcirce]

I’m crying the next person who asks her where the Jessa story is she is gonna kill them in TWP 😭

[enjakey]

Beneath the Blue

Pairing: marine engineer!Jake x marine biologist!Fem!Reader

Hey guys, I realise this fic is like really long (24k). I’m so sorry but it’s just something I’ve been holding out on. Life’s been stressful and writing was the only thing that kept me afloat and I kinda belted this out during my sleepless nights. This is definitly not proof read.

So I guess I wanted to give you guys like a guide on how to read the fic. Each section or chapter is marked by bolded words in the beginning of a paragraph (you’ll understand when you read it). If you’re only here for the cutesy stuff, you can go ahead and skip to the fourth chapter but you’ll loose all context of the story and how everyone is related to each other. The first two chapters is just a lot of world and character building. The third chapter is where things actually start.

If you’re interested in marine biology and sea creatures, this is a perfect read. I talk a lot about sharks and whales and sea creatures. There’s a lot of insight on what marine biologists do in general. There’s suggestive stuff in the end of the seventh chapter and smut in the tenth chapter if you want to skip to that. Jay, Heeseung and Jay are a huge part of the fic (but not the plot?). There is mentions of PTSD and a storm.

I want to mention that this story is not just about Jake and Y/N’s romance but about a group of people’s love for the ocean. The other characters are important for me too and the world I’ve built is dear to me. Hope you guys enjoy! I Put a lot of time effort into this! Please like and reblog and comment.

Summary: taken under the wing of the great marine biologist Henry Sim, Y/N finds herself getting close to him and his family. She’s friends with his first son, Jason, but is apprehensive of his second son, Jake. Jake, who is notorious for his bad behaviour and disappointing decisions, finds himself being drawn to Y/N and her undeniable love towards the ocean. When the two are put together in a group of researchers for an expedition for three months on the ocean, she doesn’t expect herself to fall for him- let alone, fight storms for him.

Y/N was one of those unfortunate kids who had to be in a hospital during her birthday. She was eleven at the time, the age where she was learning to read and write on her own and didn't fuss with her mother to help her bathe or dress up. She considered it her golden age where she was just starting to learn about her interests by surfing the internet through her father's phone and transitioning from cartoon shows to movies. At school, she would talk about action films, starring Tom Cruise or Angelica Jolie, rather than the deemed childish Disney movies where the Jonas Brothers were thrown into a music camp or in which a girl hides her identity by switching wigs.

An unwanted growth, widely mistaken as a malignant tumour by many doctors, was manifesting on the bone just above her eyebrow and she had reached the age where surgeons could successfully remove it without life-threatening complications. Y/N was initially scared, refusing to get out of bed in the morning and crying while she was taken to the Operating Room. In that moment of panic and fear, she didn't feel like the brave and mature girl she thought herself to be but somewhat similar to the girls on the playground who still talked about Barbie dolls and played around with make-up sets as though they could ravishingly decorate their faces with cheap lip gloss and colourless eyeshadow.

When she woke up from an anaesthetic daze, she took a moment of silence to compare herself with the other children in her class. If any kid was in her situation, being taken into surgery by a group of a dozen strangers who were only trusted because of a piece of paper- their certificate- that was meant to credit their skill, they would flail the way she had. The girls she avoided, the mean and blonde-haired ones who snickered at anyone who didn't wear skirts and pink bows in their hair and bragged about their powerful daddy's luxurious car, would probably react the way she did, perhaps even a little more dramatically. The boys she arbitrated, the cocky and lanky ones that talk about Fortnight and whatever online games they played, would probably wail like babies. But Y/N was different, whatever that meant for a girl her age, withholding herself from succumbing to middle school's criteria for popularity and burrowing herself into a circle of comfort. She was the girl that wore glasses and carried around a thick book about animals to read during lunch and she was the girl that only had one friend because they were both weird and quiet. She was the girl that cried before the surgery because she didn't trust the surgeons and not because she was convinced her parents were selling her to an organ-harvesting cult.

While she assumed most children her age would be amused by artistic renditions of unicorns and rainbows painted on the wall, she found them rather tacky. Their eyes were too shiny and their smiles were too wide and the only thing she found realistic were the tiny chips of paint in the bright colours. There was a painting of Jake the Dog from Adventure Times sitting right above her hospital bed, staring down at her with lifeless and beady eyes while she tried sleeping during the night because the hospital wanted to keep her for observation for a day or two after the surgery, increasing the service bill at the same time. Then, there was the poorly mimicked roar of a lion stained to the wall on the right side of her bed, making her wonder if these paintings were done by previously admitted children. To the wall on the right side of her bed, right below the window, was the painting of a grinning shark and a randomly doodled jellyfish.

"That looks like the Black Sea Nettle," she pointed at the jellyfish with her nimble finger.

It was early in the morning and her mother had willed her awake from her slumber so one of the doctors could check on her vitals and change her bandaid. Y/N chewed on a green apple slice her mother handed her because she refused to eat the red apples, and patiently waited until the doctor, or Doctor Karev, as he called himself, could finish writing on a piece of paper they called a chart and changing the cotton wedged between her eyebrow and white gauze. She glanced at the painting from the corner of her eye, finding it eerily similar to a picture she saw in the book her father gifted her on her ninth birthday- The Encyclopedia of Animals.

"And that looks like a Bull Shark," she said and shifted her finger slightly so it was pointed at the cartoonish shark with a bulging stomach.

"Oh, yeah?" Doctor Karev scoffed and grinned similarly to the painted shark. His gaze didn't lift from the writing pad he held towards his face, a pen scribbling information that probably wasn't important. Her mother stood beside her, a proud smile on her face as she brushed Y/N's hair with her palm. "What can you tell me about it?"

"I know that their bite is much stronger than the Great White," she offered, shrugging and looking at her lap.

"Really?" Doctor Karev almost sounded sceptical. "Where'd you learn that?"

"A book," Y/N mumbled and pursed her lips.

Doctor Karev bent his knees enough to reach her level, tilting his head affectionately to grasp her attention. His pen was now hanging in his pocket, his writing pad pressed between his hand and thigh. "You're a smart girl, aren't you?" He praised her, impressed by her skill of comprehension. "You wanna become a marine biologist?"

"Marine biologist?"

The pair of words put together were foreign to Y/N but somehow, they sounded like they were meant to be beside each other, creating the word for the profession she had been dreaming of since she saw the picture of starfish lounging on a sea bed. Her eyes were filled with somewhat of a fascination, a sparkle reflected by what she considered a discovery and fate of luck and her smile grew ten folds, stretching her cheeks until the corners of her lips reached her ears. She looked like she was watching the stars while she looked at him, blinking and burning from a close distance as she marvelled at the masses.

"Yeah," Doctor Karev enthused. "You know, study the ocean and sea creatures and all that jazz."

"I'm gonna become a marine biologist!" She nodded, giggling like a baby that had been handed a lollipop bigger than its face. Except Y/N's lollipop was a profession, a dream to chase until it was fulfilled. Her mother laughed with her, shaking her head at her antics. "Mom, I wanna be a marine biologist!"

Doctor Karev chuckled and stood straight, making his way to the door of her hospital room and looking over his shoulder to steal one last glance at the girl he might have just paved a future for. "By the way," he said. "Happy birthday kid."

It was a crystal blue sight Jake could never get used to, and it was the fact that his family owned it that he could never wrap his head around. The aquariums ranged from floor-to-ceiling tanks holding hundreds of litres of water and aquatic species to small fish bowls holding the tiniest, most common breeds of fish. Any type of fish he could think of- sharks, whales, stingrays, eels, jellyfish and cephalopods- it was probably all there, confined between glass walls, concrete and artificially plated corals. And it could all be placed in the palm of his hand, the happiness of customers and livelihood of every creature in the building he stood in, under his control.

In all of Jake's life, he had only ever seen his father angry four times- three of those incidents pertaining to tragedies faced in The Marine Foundation of Korea, his most prized possession.

The first was when he was forced to step into court for the first time in his life. During the first week that it opened, a kid tripped and fell into an eel tank and was almost choked by a Black Spotted Eel. The kid was lucky they weren't electric but Henry Sim was still faced with a million-dollar lawsuit which they won after giving security camera footage that showed the boy clearly wandering off into prohibited territory and climbing ladders into the opening of the tanks. It wouldn't be the first lawsuit they faced as a similar one followed two years later when a little girl started crying because her necklace fell into the dolphin pool and one of them devoured it.

Two years later, one of three Whale Sharks had passed away in front of a live audience causing the building to rumble as the carcass made contact with the forged ocean bed and children to wail in confusion as one of their favourite shark buddies was sinking to the floor. Hundreds of people took videos and the news went viral online, causing critics to criticise the maintenance and care for the captive creatures. As this information circled to tourists, they didn't have customers and a proper flow of income for the following six months until they announced the new exhibit for the endangered Vaquita Dolphin. Jake remembered the terrible nights of those six months when his father would come home drunk or would shatter glasses onto the walls. He wondered how his mother coped with him. He wondered how he and his brother didn't perceive him as a monster yet.

A year later, The Marine Foundation of Korea would face another tragedy. One of the shark tanks exploded in the middle of the night, causing Hammerheads and Tiger Sharks to swim through the halls of the first floor in shallow waters. Guards were panicking and emergency services took hours to reach the aquarium before they could assess and plan a rescue. The aquarium was shut down for two months and they spent time reinstating the shattered shark tank and brewing up safety measures for when similar situations would occur again. That night, they lost two Hammerhead Sharks and one Tiger Shark and had to pay thousands of dollars as compensation. Though his father didn't violently drink, he had become dangerously silent in those two months, scaring the living daylights out of his wife and children.

Henry Sim, the founder of The Marine Foundation of Korea and the most remarkable marine biologist known to all generations, had faced lawsuits that almost made him go bankrupt and was hated by the internet for months until he publicly apologised yet he would say his biggest disappointment wouldn't lie in the way his aquarium was run. Rather, he would say his biggest disappointment lay in his son, Jake Sim, who refused to take in his footsteps and fulfil his dreams of creating an empire of nepotism to take over the world of marine biology someday.

"You never listen to me," Henry seethed with a balled fist resting on his ebony table. His voice was entirely stark for the disappointment he felt towards his son.

If Jake concentrated enough, he could hear the movement of each aquatic species in the tanks he was surrounded by. The bubbly and almost ear-blocking white noise engulfed him sometimes and he would be transported to an unnamed beach where the sand was white and the waters were so clear, he could see the corals growing underneath. He liked to imagine himself floating in the waters in shorts and an oversized white t-shirt, eyes closed as the sun beat down on his porcelain skin. That was all the ocean was to him; someplace to enjoy and someplace to destress. But to his father, it was a career he made billions in and it was a career he wanted both his sons to endeavour in.

"I've been telling you since I was a kid, appa," Jake sighed, standing on the other side of the ebony table. "I want to study engineering. Marine biology, researching new species, the ocean… All of that has always been a hobby for me. Besides, you have Jason to take over your legacy anyway. I don't get why you're so hung up on me studying it, too."

In the corner of his father's office stood a small, well-kept fish tank with a lone seahorse in it. It was the Knysna Seahorse, to be exact, the rarest seahorse in the world which Jason, his brother, gifted their father as a gift. He had paid quite an amount of money to get a hold of it and the reason for the gift? It was because he had finally graduated with a marine biology degree a few months ago and Jake was to finally attend the same university.

But he didn't want to and his entire family was very well aware of the fact.

"Don't you understand what I want for you two, though?" Henry slammed his fist against the table but Jake offered no reaction. "Don't you see the future I see for you two? Brothers taking over marine biology's legacy? It’s not too late for you to change your major."

"No," Jake stomped a foot to the ground, eyes squinting to slits. "That's your dream. Not mine. I get that you and your brother never got along and that you want your sons to get along and run a business. But I don't want that. Jason and I are fine as it is and you coming in between my dreams is just gonna drive me away from you further."

"Jake-"

"If eomma were here, she would understand," Jake took long strides towards the door, a hand digging into the pocket of his slacks as the other twisted the doorknob. "I just wish you'd understand," and his voice muffled under the slam of the door, leaving Henry dumbfounded in his seat, mouth agape and glasses sliding off his nose.

With his son leaving so disrespectfully, using his wife's death as emotional manipulation, he wanted to shun Jake right then and there. He wanted no relation to him whatsoever but he knew it was his anger speaking. And he knew that if he hastily cut him off his earnings and stopped paying for his education, he would regret it and Jason would condemn him as a worse father than he already was.

So, Henry let him walk away and he went back to work, fixing his glasses and clearing his throat as if nothing happened. Jake was still young, he'd tell himself. If he wanted to follow his dreams, he should let him. Henry was selfish, he accepted it and his ego clashed with his conscience but he brushed it off and walked out of his office with more errands to complete. The moment he entered the hall with tanks of jellyfish surrounding him, the sounds of their bodies pushing through water syncing with his racing, angry heart, his assistant joined his side with a clipboard and pen, her heels overpowering the serenity of his silence.

“What’s next on today’s itinerary?” Henry asked with his hands clasped behind his back, strides becoming slower with every step.

“You need to meet with the university students today, sir,” Hae, his assistant, stated as though she expected him to remember the important occasion.

“Don’t speak to me in that tone,” he grumbled. “Of course I remember.”

“I’m assuming the talk with your son went badly?”

“I don’t know what to do with him, Hae.”

With this sigh echoing the moment, the pair made their way through the shark exhibit that costed him millions of dollars to fix all those years ago and sauntered past the stingray tanks, wondering how he was going to be an inspiration to a group of marine biology students while he felt like a failure of a father. He wondered what else he had to contribute to the field of marine biology when he had prioritised it for his entire life. It was the reason why his son hated him and it was the reason why he lost his wife- it was his lack of presence and immense ignorance that put him in a place where he truly had nothing else to lose. He had the money, the cars, the friends to brag with and an eldest son who was succeeding in life without his help- but then there was his youngest, defying him in all manners and reminding him of the mistakes that haunted his life.

However, a beacon of hope, a ray of sanguine had entered his life that day and he wouldn’t realise it until he was laying on his deathbed. In the group of future marine biologists he met that day was Y/N, standing amongst the crowd meekly with a notebook and a pen to jot down everything that she thought would help her education and career. She was the one answering questions in a whisper when no one else knew the answer, her hand barely raised in the air. When Henry saw her, her hair tied in a ponytail and clothes put together in a hurry that made her look pathetic, he could only smile. Because as he looked at her, he saw himself- the version of him that was left in the gates of his college, the version of him that had to be left back in order to become the tycoon that he was now.

So before the group of university students left, he found himself asking Y/N for a conversation and pulled her towards the gift shop while the rest of her classmates waited at the gate, murmuring and whispering about what they could be talking about. Henry placed a heavy hand on her shoulder and smiled at her the way a mentor would smile at his mentee. He had a proud smile on his face as he said, “I think you’d make an amazing marine biologist one day.”

“What?” Y/N, the poor girl, having been put down by her classmates her whole life, was gaping at his statement. Her eyes reflect a sense of hope and surprise under the golden lights of the gift shop.

“Yes,” Henry nodded enthusiastically. “I would like it if you worked with me, I could easily offer you a job,” he said. He shuffled his hand around in the pocket of his blazer and pulled out his business card and handed it to her, certain that it would come in handy for her future. “When you’re ready for a job or an internship- anything, just call me and I’ll help you out.”

Henry walked away from her, leaving his future student dumbfounded. Her eyes fixated on the business card in her hands, her thumbs and forefingers outlining the corners of the rectangle. It was a navy blue colour, his name, number and The Marine Foundation of Korea carved in golden ink. It looked like her ticket to a new life, the life she had chased since she was a little kid carrying around an encyclopaedia of animals. It was the golden ticket in her Charlie and The Chocolate Factory.

It was a good analogy in her head. Henry Sim, the man with greying hair and diminishing eyesight, was Willy Wonka and she was Charlie, the lost boy that simply wanted a taste of something better, something great. So when it was time for her to get an internship, Henry had taken her under his wing.

“You must be Y/N.”

When Y/N started off as an intern, she started questioning whether she had made the right choice. Some of her friends were off travelling the seven seas to research unknown species of the depths and others were working in labs established on beach sides. They were living in tropical islands like the Caribbean or Hawaii and their instagrams were filled with them in diving gear and sea creatures in their natural habitats. Y/N had always dreamt of a life as such, to swim with sharks and study their behaviours or to explore the depths of the ocean floor within the safety of a yellow submarine. She imagined she would travel the world by the time she graduated college and she imagined spending most of her days on a boat, whale watching or spotting dolphins.

There was that one semester in college where she got an experience as close to what she imagined. She, along with a few other promising students, were selected to spend a semester on sea where they spent learning how to dive and sail ships. It was a memorable four months, really, to spend it with a group of people she later called friends and bonding with people on sea over half cooked fish. In that time, though the most astonishing creature they spotted was a Red Octopus, she assumed she was being trained for the future she had always dreamed of, only to end up within the confines of an aquarium- Asia’s largest aquarium, granted. Her job description as an intern included watching other employees take care of the confined species or listening to Henry, the founder, teach her more about the marine species while she took notes. There were the occasional times she was asked to write a research paper, which she did with Jason but she would much rather prefer doing the same in a lab on the beach or on a boat sailing across the Pacific Ocean.

During this time, she pondered if she should have just followed her father’s footsteps in becoming an astronomer. She would look back at her childhood when her father would teach her about constellations and planets while she looked through the giant telescope that was perched on their roof and she would wonder if such a job would make her happier. She recalled the stories her mother would tell her as a Greek historian and wondered if she should have majored in History instead. She even wondered if she should have followed her friends into their jobs instead of taking the internship in the first place. Her uncertainties came to a halt a year ago, though, when Henry promoted her as manager.

In the five years that Y/N started working in The Marine Foundation of Korea, she learnt the names and voices of everyone working there. As the manager, it wasn’t only her job but also her duty to do so, to know who she was working with and grow a personal relationship with the people around her. She knew that one of the janitor’s kid had a heart condition and she would visit him in the hospital once in a while. She knew that one of the divers working for the aquarium was in a long term relationship and was planning on proposing to his girlfriend soon- she could recognise his voice even while he struggled to speak underwater. She also knew that her boss and legal guardian, Henry Sim, had ambitions he could never fulfil because of his youngest son.

One could call her the all-knowing within the walls of the aquarium. Not only was she intelligent, she was the keeper of all the employees’ worries and burdens.

In those five years that she spent reaching her level of success, to be able to buy her own apartment in an expensive neighbourhood and to be able to afford to buy a new phone without double-checking her bank account, she had learned a lot of tricks to perfect the skills of managing the establishment that she ran when the owner wasn’t present. A once shy and timid girl became the hard-headed, thick skinned superior that demanded precision in completed work and pristine publications of whatever research papers they release. But when she wasn’t acting that way, she was calm and walked down the crystalline hallways of Korea’s beloved and prestigious aquarium with a welcoming smile.

Of all the people she knew that worked amongst the aquarium, of the few people she found herself acquainted with, the voice that was breathing into her ear from behind her did not belong to anyone she was familiar with. She could feel his chest ghosting against her back, his smirk louder than his voice could ever be. His hair brushed against her cheek and Y/N found herself spinning around with a scowl on her face.

“Jake,” she stated with discern, her obvious distaste towards him sitting heavily on her brows. His smirk only grew wider, his hand clasping behind his back as he leaned closer to her than before.

In the years that she’d known Henry and Jason Sim, she had grown rather close to them. They accepted her into their family by some sort and she was invited to every dinner they hosted in one of those fancy Chinese or Sushi restaurants- whether she attended or not was up to her. If she did attend though, she would be introduced to guests like she was Henry’s own daughter and Jason had always treated her like a sister by the way he kept her company throughout her years as an intern. Her parents, too, had grown quite fond of the father and son.

Jason and Y/N’s friendship, Henry always used to say, was unexpected. He expected them to work together and get along with each other for the sake of their jobs and business, but he was never expecting the siblingly bond they had created. Oftentimes, the pair would find themselves going out for lunch together during breaks or driving to the beach just for the sake of having some entertainment. They would regularly find themselves at each other's houses in the middle of the night with beers and soju in hopes of having movie marathons. Somewhere in that friendship, Y/N learnt a lot about the missing Sim brother.

He was studying Engineering somewhere in Australia, she learned, and he had only visited his family only a couple of times in all his years of education. There was the one time he flew back to Seoul to spend the New Year with Henry and Jason where she heard he got embarrassingly drunk and broke a glass table. Then there was the other time he visited for Christmas but disappeared within an hour without a word. Speaking of Jake meant hearing stories as such, where he was disrespectful, unexpectable and had no sense of respect. She heard that he once cussed at a shareholder because he was being too nosey.

Y/N had only ever met Jake once. Well, they didn’t exactly meet, she had just seen him passing by in a crowd. It was at another one of Henry’s lavish dinner parties where round tables were cloaked with gold cloth and napkins folded into cranes. Golden chandeliers lit above groups of conversations and amongst one of those stood Jake with overly styled hair and a suit too expensive to be bought with his own money. He was talking to some investors- or business men, she didn’t know- with one hand in his pocket and the other holding a wine glass he languidly sipped on. She was told by Jason that it was one of those rare times Jake didn’t make a scene during a party but she also heard he took a random girl to a hotel room for a one-night-stand, never to call her again.

“You say my name with such loathing,” Jake pointed out, his eyes narrowing as his teeth peeked behind his smirk. “I’d get if my dad and brother talked to me that way, but what did I ever do to you?”

Y/N took a step back, crossing her arms across her chest and tapping her heel lightly against the carpeted floor. She looked at him vexed, her mouth pursing into disinterest. Jake stood back straight, moving his hands into the pockets of his jeans and tilting his head in curiosity. If Y/N didn’t know any better, she would call him a pervert and get him thrown out of the premises by one of the guards just because she wanted to.

“I’ve heard enough stories to make a judgement,” she stated firmly.

“Is that any way to talk to your boss’ son?” He taunted.

“I frankly don’t think he’d care.”

Jake chuckled, lowering his gaze to his feet and shaking his head. His smile was bright, the crystalline waters that surrounded them reflecting on his face. A HammerHead shark from the tank behind him swam across him, followed by a Sting Ray and those animals held more of her attention than he did. “Sorry we got off on the wrong foot, Y/N,” he said and sauntered away from her, assuming he was making his way towards his father’s office. Her eyes followed him but she looked away when he glanced at her from over his shoulder. Clearing her throat, she found herself walking towards another floor of the aquarium.

Jason was right, she thought, his accent really is annoying.

Instead of the tunnel she was observing before, she was now in a fairly confined room with rectangular fish tanks one over the other, covering the span of all four walls, apart from the door. In the tanks were miniscule jellyfish that were soon to be moved to one of the larger tanks for the public to gush at. Of all the places in the aquarium, this room was probably the one she visited the most. Not because it was her favourite or anything but rather because these creatures needed most inspection. If the temperature was changed even a little bit or if the water was getting too dirty, there was a chance that a whole batch of these jellyfish would simply disintegrate.

It had happened once before, not under her watch but some other intern, who failed to notice the decrease in temperature in the room. It was a waste of a lot of Henry's money and it was also one of his favourite species that had met their demise. Because of the intern’s mistake, he yelled at him in front of the majority of the other staff and fired him. Since then, Y/N had always been cautious around her work. Perhaps it was why he was always so fond of her- she never knew why.

“Y/N?”

She flinched when she heard Jason’s voice, his head peeking into the room from the small crack of the door.

“What is it with you and your brother scaring me today?” She breathed, her hand placed over her chest.

“You met him?”

“Yeah he was walking down the tunnel, made nice.”

“He annoyed you, didn’t he?”

“Yup.”

“His first impressions are always bad.”

Jason was leading her out of the room, bringing her to the ground floor where she saw tourists and customers flocking towards the ticket booth. If there was one thing about Henry she never understood, it was the fact that he refused to digitalise the ticketing system. In fact, he refused to digitalise many things in the aquarium. He had the physical copy of every research paper published by the The Marine Foundation of Korea and his logs were still done by hand. Technology hates me and I hate technology, he would always say and this mostly stemmed from the incident where he accidentally deleted all his pictures from Google Photos.

“Isn’t an excuse to breathe down my neck,” she argued as he led her to his office.

“Damn.”

“Yeah,” she pressed. “He talked to me like he’d heard of me.”

“Obviously he’s heard of you.”

“No, I mean,” she paused, looking to her side to make eye contact with him. She wasn’t sure how to explain it, so she stuttered and used animated hand gestures to make her point. “Like he knows me.”

“Yeah, well, dad and I talk about you to him all the time.”

“What the hell?”

“In like, a business way,” Jason defended. “He asks how work goes and you sometimes come up in the conversation.”

“And what do you tell him?”

“That you’re good at your job?” He raised his brow, a confused smile meeting her look of disbelief. “Don’t take it the wrong way, he’s honestly probably just jealous.”

“Jealous?”

“Dad trusts you more than him, you know?”

Before Y/N had the chance to respond with a confused remark, perhaps even a puzzled expression, Jason was pushing open the door to Henry’s office and they were met with the sight of Henry sitting on his desk and Jake standing beside him with a grin, leaning towards whatever he was being shown on the monitor screen. Jason and Y/N settled in the chairs on the other side of the desk, the former confidently crossing one ankle over the other knee and the former confused as to why she was there in the first place. Jason had to tug her sleeve to keep her from squirming and looking around confused. There was a moment of silence that passed, Y/N’s gaze zipping between Henry and the tanks his office was surrounded by. Henry murmured to Jake while pointing at his monitor, analysing something Y/N and Jason weren’t aware of. Jake nodded along, pinching at his bottom lip in thought.

“Y/N?” Henry called. She answered with a curious hum, her brows raising. “You’re free next week? Thursday?”

“Yes, why?”

“Well, you know,” Henry brought his attention away from the monitor and towards her, pushing his glasses farther up his nose with his pinky. “I told you about it. An old friend of mine is opening a restaurant with a huge tank. He wants us there on opening night.”

“Oh, right. I remember,” she nodded.

“What, Mr. Bahng didn’t invite me?” Jake stood back straight with his arms crossed, his grin refusing to leave his expression. He looked between his father and brother, only glancing at Y/N once before continuing to tease them.

They, of course, did not find him amusing. “All of us, Jake,” Jason replied with a roll of his eyes.

“Yes, and it’s going to be a rather quiet gathering,” Henry continued. “So I expect you to be on your best behaviour.”

“When have I ever let you down, father?” Jake chuckled; Henry rolled his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Y/N,” Henry looks at her with tired eyes. “He’s got all sorts of fish in his tank, he’s even got a Whale Shark in there-”

“Woah, what?”

“Yeah, I know, it cost a fortune but anyways,” Henry waved off. “He wants to know fun facts- his words, not mine- about all the species he’d got in there so could you be a dear and…?”

“Yeah, no problem,” Y/N grinned and patted Henry's hand that rested on his desk. “Anything but having to socialise with strangers.”

“Can I join her?” Jason chimed, pointing his thumb towards her.

In that moment, Henry glanced between his son and favourite-slash-best employee and they resembled children asking whether they could take a break from studying to watch cartoons. His eyes twitched, thinking that he didn’t want to deal with annoyance other than his younger son. “No,” Henry said. “You’re socialising with strangers. So are you, Jake.”

Jake, who was about to open his mouth to protest with a finger raised in the air, gulped and dropped his hands down to his sides and nodded with pursed lips.

The opening night to Mr. Bahng’s restaurant was a spectacle. What was planned as an intimate gathering turned into a media spectacle. Paparazzi flocked the entrance of the restaurant and bodyguards had to hold back the public as the handsome sons of Henry Sim, the founder of The Marine Foundation of Korea, walked the red carpet. Minor celebrities, a few actors and foreign entertainers attended the evening- some spotted the Jenner Sisters and others hollered at Jason Momoa and Leo DiCaprio. DiCaprio was an old friend of Henry’s- they met through ocean conservation funds and over the years, he had earned a permanent place on Henry’s invite list and vice-versa. Y/N had the pleasure of meeting him once, barely for a few minutes, for a hand shake and to be introduced as the aquarium’s manager and top researcher.

Y/N walked the red carpet with her arm looped with Jason’s, her free hand holding the hem of her sparkly dress in order not to trip in the ruckus. Her hand would occasionally come up to shield her eyes from the camera flashes and Jason had to repeatedly catch her frame because she was tripping on her heels. They were both dreading to see how the paparazzi pictures would turn out the next morning. Jake, on the other hand, walked confidently with a hand in his pocket and the other waving and blowing kisses at everyone. Photographers and netizens were gawking at the Australian engineer graduate, asking for pictures and photographs but ultimately being turned down. He was famously known on the internet for his looks, Prince Charming-like looks and mannerisms. His personality? It was a mystery to all those on the internet, further feeding into delusions of young fan-girls. It was only Jason and Henry that filmed for interviews for the world of marine-biology, often showing up on the news to promote The Marine Foundation of Korea or to talk about their next big break-through in marine sciences.

Henry and Mr. Bahng were the last to walk the carpet- they were the highlight of the event, after all. When they finally entered the restaurant, the glass doors were shut and bolted behind them, bodyguards taking their place in front of the premises like they were protecting The Sphinx. What was inside the restaurant might as well be as valuable as The Sphinx- there were barely any lights to illuminate the subtle interiors of the restaurant. Circular tables spanned the floor, glass windows towering the walls for the public to see inside if it weren’t for the black curtains. Everything else was painted black, too- the walls, the tables, the black marbled floors. The tank however… The tank glowed blue, just like the tanks in the aquarium. It spanned the entirety of one of the four walls in the restaurant. Schools of fish swam by, accompanied by Stingrays, Hammerhead and Leopard sharks. A lone Mola Mola swam by, its eye holding a vacant stare as it scanned the spans of the restaurant on the other side of the glass.

The showstopper, however, would only make its presence when Y/N finally made her way towards the exhibit. Her heels clicked against the black marble, one hand holding the hem of her dress and the other clutching her purse. The loose strands that fell from her hair up-do fanned her shoulders and just as her bangs bristled her eyes, the Whale Shark swam past the tank. It glided effortlessly across the water, its massive and speckled body moving with a hypnotic grace, throwing Y/N into a trance. She stood in awe, eyes scanning for when she could see it again, acting like she didn’t see Whale Sharks everyday in the aquarium. It was the ambiance of the restaurant that made the tank more mesmerising, if she had to be honest. She’d never seen anything like it.

Jake didn’t get a chance to admire the premises yet, sucked into meeting the guests and investors with his father and brother. When he found a chance to slip away, he made his way to the bar and ordered himself a double shot of whiskey. He promised himself that it would be his first and last drink, remembering his promise of behaving for the night. The last time his father brought him to a public gathering, which was almost two years ago, he almost set the venue on fire and broke a glass table. Scowling at the memories he dug up, he took a seat on a black stool at the bar, wandering his eyes around the guests and seeing men and women of power mingle in unexpected cliques. Finally, his gaze landed on the tank, the main attraction of the night, its hue misting the ambience and painting his skin in a sparkling blue. He admired it, watching the Whale Shark languidly make its way back and forth across the tank, sucker fish clinging onto its skin and a lone Leatherback Turtle following it.

Eventually, his eyes dragged towards the far corner of the restaurant where he found the back of Y/N’s silhouette. She, too, was admiring the tank. Gripping his glass of whiskey, he made his way towards her, a sly smile gracing his lips and the whites of his eyes twinkling brighter with the blue hue. As he walked closer, he could make out the familiar color of her dress that he spent the whole limo-ride staring at. It was a sparkly blue and silver dress, thin straps that barely held the dress up her bust. Her hair was put up in a messy bun, two hair pins with silver sea turtles holding it in place. Her earrings matched her hair pins and her heels matched the silver of her dress. The blue hue colored her skin and he swore he was looking at a still-life painting.

“Where’d you get the dress from?”

Y/N looked over her shoulder to catch Jake’s smirk that she learned to despise through Jason’s anecdotes. The smirk that led to his many one-night-stands, his smirk that led to all the decisions that made his father angry at him, the smirk that led to disasters was the same smirk that was walking towards her. Her serenity pulled into annoyance and Jake could see it in her eyes, her brows wrinkling and her lips sneered.

“Hey, I’m just playing nice,” he offered, trying his best to shrug and surrender his motivations. He took another sip of his whiskey, keeping his gaze fixed on her expression.

Y/N turned her body to face him and now, his eyes were wandering down her frame, staring at all the curves of her body that her dress showed off, just as he did in the limo. “It’s an old dress, I wear it a lot,” she admitted. Then, she knocked a nod towards the glass in his hand. “Let me guess, fifth drink of the night?”

“Come on, the night just started,” he rolled his eyes, the gnarly smirk refusing to leave his expression. “It’s my only drink of the night. Promised dad I’d behave, remember?”

“Right,” she swallowed. The hand that was holding the hem of her dress moved to clutch her purse, both her hands pressing into stomach. A water came around with a tray of appetizers, ironic that it was all seafood. Jake finished his drink and handed the empty glass to the waiter, taking two pieces of appetizers- one for him and one for Y/N.

Silence engulfed them as they stood side by side, both now facing the tank and staring at the creatures and coral spanning across her, the only sound being the loud swishes of the water and their chewing. Y/N was not staring to admire anymore; she was staring to distract herself from the awkward presence, to pass time in any way that she could.

“Aren’t you supposed to be socialising?” Y/N asked, hoping he’d realise and leave.

“I’d rather stare at this than socialise,” Jake said, both his hands digging into his trousers.

He wasn’t sure what stories his father and Jason fed Y/N about him for her to hold onto her negative impression of her. She probably thought he hated his family’s line of work, to read about water and the ocean beds and fish all day. In reality, he loved marine biology, he truly did. But he wasn’t going to apologize for not seeing it as his career. Jake still went to the aquarium of every city he would visit, spent time reading the articles and journals his father published and watched marine documentaries in his free time. He even had a small fish tank in his apartment back in Australia- he had two Firefish Goby and two Cardinalfish. He loved marine biology so much, he specialised in marine engineering. He wasn’t sure if Y/N knew that.

“Can I ask you a question?” Jake turned to her. She raised her brows in curiosity, coaxing him to continue. “Why this?”

“What?”

“I mean, why this?” He pointed at the fish tank just as the Whale Shark swam past them again. “Fish tanks, standing in one place, staring, the aquarium. Why, when you could have gone to bigger research centers like in Hawaii, or something?”

Jake almost regretted asking the question when he saw the expression on Y/N’s face turn solemn. She brought her bottom lip between her teeth, chewing as though she was chewing her brain to find him the answer to his question. Not so she could give it to him but because she wanted to give it to herself. Why? She asked herself that, too.

“I don’t know, Jake,” she sighed. “It seemed right at the time and… I guess, I just didn’t know? Who would pass up an opportunity to work with Henry Sim, you know? He chose me. And I’m not saying I regret it, I’ve found family in him and Jason but I ask myself why, too. I miss being out on the waters.”

Ignoring all that she said about his father and brother, knowing it would trigger him, he smirked at her again. He knew how she felt, it was the same thing Jason used to tell him a few years ago. As mesmerising as aquariums were, being out in the sea and seeing marine creatures in the wilderness is like cutting to a surgery intern. Jake had only gone on an ocean expedition once his whole life. His father took him during high school while he was applying for universities in hopes of changing his mind about his major. Jake remembered loving it, being enamored and lost in what the ocean had to offer, to witness its mystery with his own eyes. But unfortunately for his father, it still wasn’t enough to replace his love for engineering.

“I get it,” he assured her. “Don’t worry though. It won’t be this way for long.”

Before Y/N could ask what he meant, to make him elaborate, they heard Henry hollering their names from across the restaurant. He was waving their hand at them, Jason standing beside him sulking in boredom. Jake and Y/N speed-walked towards him, joining him at the table along with a scholar of jellyfish biology.

“Bahng is going to give his speech soon. Sit,” Henry told the pair.

Mr.Bahng’s speech went on for longer than most would like. He stood in the middle of the room with a drink raised in the air, thanking his family, friends and colleagues for making his dreams come true. His daughter stood beside him, trying to calm his influenced-state but it had all only turned into a comical predicament. Y/N caught Jake eyeing the daughter, knowing she must have been one of his old conquests. Most women she knew of her age who ran in the same circles were all probably one of Jake’s old conquests. She wasn’t going to shame these women, she understood the appeal- the wide smile, the sparkling eyes, the smooth hair and dashing facial features. However, she wouldn’t miss a chance to shame Jake, especially around Jason.

Sick and bored of it all, Jason signaled to Jake to grab a drink with him at the bar. As the pair stood up, leaving Y/N alone with Henry and the jellyfish scholar, Henry questioned the pair.

“No more drinks for Jake,” he warned.

“One more can’t hurt. I’m fine,” Jake defended himself, only to be met by an eye roll and a wave of his hand, telling them to go away and come back soon.

The brothers ordered whiskey for themselves. They’ve been told all the men in their family were whiskey enthusiasts. So is their father- apart from the phase he had when he was an angry drunkard, hammered with cheap beer and vodka most of the nights. Now that it had subsided, he was back to whiskey and that too, only rarely.

“Have you not told Y/N yet?” Jake asked his brother as they settled down onto the tall stools. By then, Mr. Bahng’s speech had ended and the room erupted in small talk again. Y/N’s ears were probably being ripped off by the jellyfish scholar but knowing her, she was definitely enjoying the conversation.

“Told her what?” Jason looked at him with utter confusion.

“The research team? Summer expedition?” Jake tried jogging his memory.

“Oh, right!” Jason nodded, sipping on his drink and hissing when an ice cube touched his teeth- it was a pet peeve he’s had since he was young, but he loved the taste of cold beverages. “We wanted to surprise her. Dad knows how much she’s been waiting for this so we’re gonna tell her on a better day.”

“Oh, God. I was on the verge of telling her,” Jake frowned.

“But she doesn’t suspect anything, right?”

“Nope, not a thing.”

“Crisis averted, then!” Jason assured him. “Dad and I are still figuring out how to tell her. Got any ideas?”

“She hates me, I’m sure she doesn’t want to hear any good news from me,” Jake chuckled.

“Y/N doesn’t hate you,” Jason Looked at him baffled and confused, mouth pulled upwards in surprise.

Jake scoffed. “Yes,” he said. “She does. And it’s because of the crap you and dad feed her.”

“Jake, she doesn’t hate you. I know when Y/N hates someone and she doesn’t hate you,” Jason chuckled. “She’s just a bit apprehensive of you and I don’t blame her. You’re a character-”

“Thanks, man-”

“And she takes time with certain people. To be fair, people like you aren’t her scene.”

“I’m not her scene? The fuck does that mean?” Jake laughed, finishing the last of his drink.

“Jake, you’re the drink and let’s party kinda person. She’s not. She likes peace and quiet and books and fancy sofas to sit on. She’s just quiet, dude. Give her time.”

“Yeah, fair enough,” Jake rolled his eyes.

Just then, Y/N found her way to Jason’s side, the click of her heels stopping at the stool beside him. She had an annoyed expression on her face, her eyes tired and almost lifeless. “Your dad’s calling. We’re going home,” she deadpanned and turned to walk away, the hem of her dress in one hand as her hips swayed with more vigour. She was sleepy and tired and if the limo didn’t drop her off at home, she was going to crash in Jason’s bed.

Sunlight danced across the crests, water stretching endlessly into a mosaic of light and motion. Gentle swells rolled beneath the research vessel while occasional whitecaps broke against the hull of the boat. Y/N lay stretched on the warmed deck, salty breeze tickling her stomach and bringing frizzy curls to her hair. Clad in a striped bikini, she left little to the imagination. It was an early morning for her, seagulls mulling over the Indian Ocean and skies still painted with a pink hue. Everyone on the team was still asleep and she took the opportunity to seize the morning.

The first person to wake up was Sunghoon, one of Jake’s friends, who happened to be an oceanographer and drone operator. He studied ocean currents and temperature changes and learned how to pilot drones in order to collect data on plankton blooms. Without him, the entire whale research expedition would be impossible. Sunghoon greeted Y/N with a drowsy smile, clad in only a pair of shorts himself, taking in the morning sunlight.

Following him was Jay, one of Jason’s friends, who was a cetologist and acoustic analyst. He was rubbing a towel against his wet hair, waving at Y/N who started to put on her shirt out of a slight insecurity that crept onto her cheeks. Behind him, Jason and Heeseung joined with plates of toasted bread and a carton of orange juice. Jason threw a piece of bread towards Y/N and she swiftly caught it, thanking him for breakfast.

Heeseung was known as a young prodigy in the field, perfecting his skills in steering and working as the boat captain and field technician. Jake, too, came aboard as a field technician- a marine engineer himself. In fact, If it weren’t for Jake, Henry Sim would probably have never agreed to this whale research expedition in the first place. Jake wanted to test out new equipment that was hitting the market and who better to test the equipment than The Marine Foundation of Korea? It took a lot of convincing and buttering up his father to convince, yet here he was, heading an entire project by himself with some of his closest friends. If Y/N had squinted hard enough at the predicament, this was basically a vacation for a bunch of fish nerds.

She sat on the deck with her legs brought to her chest, chewing on the soggy piece of bread and watching as Jake finally made his way towards the group of boys with a bowl of scrambled eggs in his hand. Vaguely, she could hear Sunghoon say, “your father must finally be proud of you,” and Jason circling back with a sarcastic comment. It made the group rumble with laughter and Y/N felt herself cracking a smile too.

It was probably around three months ago when Jason and Henry broke the news to her. She was coming back from having a measly lunch at a convenience store nearby and had entered Henry’s office to collect a few files. When she opened the door, Jason and Henry had been waiting for her with a cake in their hands and beaming smiles on their faces. “If you’d walked in any later, I would have started eating this thing without you,” Jason chuckled at her, pulling out a plastic knife from his pocket.

Y/N looked at the pair with confusion, eyes darting between the greeting brows of Henry and the grinning mouth of Jason. Then, her eyes fell towards the chocolate cheesecake they were holding, the word “Congratulations!” pipped on with melted chocolate. She recognised this cake. It was the same one they’d buy for every one of her birthdays she spent with them over the past five years. However, the absence of “Happy Birthday!” threw her off- also, the fact that it wasn’t her birthday.

“What is this for?” She asked, feeling as though this was almost a mistake. This cake was expensive and she almost felt guilty. “Guys, nothing’s happened,” she widened her eyes, shook her head and waved her hands in front of her to demonstrate no.

“What do you mean, Kkomaya?” Henry chuckled. “You’re gonna be part of a research team. That’s a huge thing to celebrate.”

“What?”

“Yeah.”

Jason handed her a piece of folded paper that was tucked away in his blazer. It read the details of a whale research expedition that would take place during the summer and span into autumn season. Y/N could barely skim through the details when her eyes landed on the plethora of signatures that filled the end of the paper. She recognised Henry, Jake and Jason’s signatures and some of a few government officials that signed off on the research expedition and agreed to fund for it. Right beside Jake’s signature was an empty dotted line, waiting for Y/N’s signature.

“You’re joking,” she gasped.

“Sign it so we can cut this cake and celebrate, Y/N. My hand’s getting sore,” Jason chuckled again.

“Oh, right. Sorry!”

What followed next was a string of excited screams, giggles and jumping around until Y/N finally signed the paper and threw herself into Henry and Jason to hug. Then, they cut the cake and each enjoyed a piece, the rest to be distributed amongst the employees of the aquarium in light of good news. A few moments later, Jake entered the room, coyly making his way towards Y/N to give her a handshake. Since the night of Mr. Bahng’s restaurant opening, the pair had developed a healthy rapport. He would visit the aquarium sometimes, bumping into Y/N in the process and making polite conversation. He made efforts to be a little more respectful towards her, packing away his cocky personality only in front of her. She once asked him why he was spending so much time in Korea, leaving his job in Australia and he responded aloofly. She got her answer now.

Now, it was the end of May and Y/N was on a research vessel with an unfamiliar group. Though she spent a week getting to know them before leaving for the expedition, seeing them interact on the deck, throwing around jokes like they’d known each other their whole lives… she wasn’t sure how to act that way. She felt like the odd one out, the loose end. Jake and Sunghoon were childhood friends; Jason and Jay were college friends and Heeseung was Mr. Bahng’s oldest son so Jake and Jason had known of him since they were kids. She’s met him a handful of times before, including the night of Mr. Bahng’s restaurant opening. But she didn’t know him like everyone else did.

“Y/N!” Jason waved for her to come over and she did, lifting herself off the lounging chair and walking towards them. It was their third day together on this vessel and she still wasn’t sure how to approach anyone when they were grouped together. She hated saying it, but she relied on Jason to include her when it came to the socialising side of her work. The practicality, however? She was splendid.

“Today’s the day we need to actually start working,” Heeseung said to her as she approached them. Jason made space between himself and Heeseung so she could stand in the circle with them. “It’s mostly Jay and Sunghoon that’s gotta do the work today, figuring out the equipment and all. Jake and I will help. You and Jason stay in stand by, for now. You can go on dives, get your practice on. Just be careful, make sure one of us is scouting…”

And Heeseung rambled on, eventually moving on to telling Jay and Sunghoon what their itinerary consisted of. Y/N’s eyes wandered off to the ocean, water spanning for miles on end, no land near site. They were in the middle of nowhere- well, not literally. They knew their coordinates. But if their equipment were to damage or if one fell overboard, they were as good as dead. It’s moments and opportunities like these marine biologists spend their lives working towards- what Y/N spent her days waiting for.

“So, that’s final?” Sunghoon started. “Jay and I will get the hydrophones, then?”

“Yep,” Heeseung clasped his hands together and everyone started dispersing, mumbling words of encouragement and affirmations, pumping their fists in the air or clapping to get their spirits up.

Before everyone had the chance to disappear and get their gear prepared, Jason stopped everyone and said, “should we make, like, a group chant sort of thing?”

“Yeah, that’s not happening, mate,” Jake pursed his lips and patted his brother on his chest. Y/N chuckled and the rest of them laughed while walking away to continue their work.

It took Jay and Sunghoon a total of four hours to deploy the five units of hydrophones, both floating and anchored. While diving, they would constantly resurface for air and call for Jake, yelling, “What kind of new technology is this, you twat, I prefer the old ones!” Their anger bubbled, frustrated at the fact that a two hour process was taking them double the time only because of the unfamiliarity. After their fourth complaint, Jake ended up diving with them to help.

Heeseung stayed with Jason and Y/N to help test and calibrate the hydrophones. While they sent test signals, Y/N cursed under her breath, too, telling Jason, “we could have just used the old equipment. This new shit Jake brought us is not user friendly.”

“People thought that about the iPhone but they love it now, don’t they?” Jason offered, hoping to reduce Y/N’s distaste. She could only respond by rolling her eyes.

By the time they were done, the sun had started setting and the divers barely ate food. The trio that stayed on the vessel cooked a heavy dinner with whatever ingredients they had, feeding the divers the second they freshened up. The group assembled on the deck, the same place they were huddling in the morning, with blankets wrapped around their shoulders to shield from the chilly breeze.

“Where’s Jason?” Jake looked around.

“He’s finishing with the final sample recordings. He’ll be up in a bit,” Y/N assured.

Jason came back with six chairs, one for everyone to sit on as they debriefed for the night. Warm water was passed around as conversation fluidly changed from work to personal history. The stars were shining unfamiliarly, a sight Y/N couldn’t get in the city anymore. She was reminded of her father who used to point to the constellations and tell her their names. As a kid, she knew most of them by heart. Now, she was unable to recognise most of the constellations, only being able to pick out a few.

“Add in a bonfire and the night would be perfect,” Jay sighed, shivering as he hugged his blanket tighter.

“Oh, we used to go camping a lot in college,” Jason mused. “Those were the times, man. Young and alive.”

“I’d say you’re living it up right now as well, bro,” Heeseung laughed, referring to their boat that was in the middle of the ocean, whale watching and diving as a part of their job description and getting paid above average.

“True,” Jason scratched the nape of his neck in embarrassment. Jake further made fun of Jason and Sunghoon joined in, throwing pieces of crumpled paper from their notebooks at him.

“Look at the stars, guys,” Heeseung directed everyone’s gaze towards the sky. “You don't have nights like these in the city anymore.”

“I was thinking the same thing,” Y/N nodded. “Gotta take it all in before we leave.”

“We’ve got three months for that, don’t worry,” Sunghoon assured.

“Hey, Y/N, wasn’t your dad an astronomer?” Jason clocked his head. “He used to teach you when you were a kid, where each constellation was?”

“Yeah, how’d you know?”

“You told me, like, a really long time ago.”

“Your dad did physics in college? That’s so cool,” Jake pipped, sitting at the edge of his chair and directing his excited smile at her. He’s always had a habit of becoming excited at the mention of physics and math- the entire reason he went into engineering.

“Do you still remember some of the constellations?” When Heeseung asked, Y/N nodded. “Do tell us,” he encouraged.

Bringing her bottom lip between her teeth, she looked up and squinted her eyes to see if anything looked familiar. “Do you guys see the diamond shape?” She heard everyone confirm with a hum. “That’s The Corvus or The Crow. Dad used to say that the crow was a messenger from the sea.”

”Wah,” she heard Jason and Jay exclaiming as she continued searching.

“Do you see a teapot, perchance? Right there,” Y/N attempted to show them its correct location by pointing and once again, she was met with a group of hums. “That’s The Sagittarius. It contains the center of the Milky Way.”

”Wait, I’ve heard about this,” Jake snapped his fingers, trying to jog his memory. “Didn’t sailors use it to locate the galactic core or something?”

”You’re right, I’m surprised you knew that,” Y/N smirked and tried finding another constellation.

In the background, Sunghoon pondered aloud on what it would be like if he could name a constellation after himself and it brought the group into a laughing fit. Jake, though he laughed with them, kept his gaze on Y/N, admiring the way her nose tilted upwards and gaze reflected the starry sky. Jake, who once picked up a book on astronomy out of sheer curiosity and gave up on reading it due to its lack of logic and mechanics, found himself leering as she explained the stars to everyone.

“Do you guys see the red star? That’s Antares, the heart of The Scorpion,” she explained.

”Wow,” Sunghoon started and snapped towards Jake as though he had a revelation. “Wait, isn’t that your constellation? You’re a Scorpio, right?”

”Yeah, how’d you know?”

”I’ve known you your whole life, asshole. Don’t tell me you don’t know my zodiac.”

”I do, I do!”

”What is it?”

”Sagittarius! I thought about it when Y/N pointed it out, I swear!”

Then started the narration of Jake and Sunghoon becoming friends. Jake’s mother, Vivian, moved into the street that Sunghoon’s parents, Daniel and Emily Park, lived in. Both couples were newly weds, just getting back from their honeymoon. Vivian had already been pregnant with Jason at the time and because her and Emily grew close, she was there the day Jason was born. When their husbands were off to work, Emily would often spend her time with Vivian, taking care of her and Jason. Around a year later, Vivian fell pregnant again and Emily announced her pregnancy exactly a month later.

The two mothers spent all their time together thereafter, going to the hospital for check ups together and supporting each other through pregnancy yoga exercises. With each other's support, they didn’t worry about their husbands working overtime. They even hired a nanny together, shifting between houses to help with household work and with Jason, who was still too young to understand his surroundings at the time.

Jake and Sunghoon were born a month apart, Jake being the older one. Emily was in the hospital while Vivian gave birth and vice versa. Henry and Daniel were in wonder of their friendship- it was like it was out of the movies, utopian for the society they lived in today. It was a good thing the two families found each other in this dog-eat-dog world.

Jake and Sunghoon went to the same schools, same clubs and festered the same hobbies so they could do everything together. Their mothers used to joke that they’d end up falling for the same girl one day. “And what would you do if that ever happened?” Emily used to ask Sunghoon and he would respond with, “boy code- I’ll stay away from her if he likes her and I know he’d do the same for me.” In fact, he did and when a similar situation arose in middle school, neither of them got the girl because they valued their friendship more.

Around the time Jake and Sunghoon were old enough to perceive and build on their imaginations, they started pulling pranks on Jason. It was the nasty ones- like, putting saran wrap on the toilet seat or sticking gnarly notes on his bag before he left for school. Once, they rolled a skateboard into him while he was walking into his bedroom and he fell face first into the floor, breaking his nose and costing his parents an emergency trip to the hospital. Jason and Jake didn’t speak for a full month after that incident.

When Jake and Sunghoon turned sixteen, the Park family started talking about relocating to China. Daniel had better job prospects and he was convinced that his children, Sunghoon and Yeji who were four years apart, would receive better education. “And international exposure is always good for a child,” he’d tell Emily. Sunghoon would argue that he wouldn’t leave the country until college and Yeji would cry about not wanting to leave her friends.

It was around this time that Henry opened The Marine Foundation of Korea and started earning more. Their family moved to a more expensive neighbourhood but that didn’t stop Jake and Sunghoon from spending most of their time together. In fact, when Henry had gone on his drinking spree due to the lawsuits and backlash, Jake would run off to Sunghoon’s house, leaving his poor mother and brother to deal with his scary father. When it came time to decide upon college and careers, Sunghoon sat through arguments with Henry to allow Jake to pursue his passions in engineering.

When Jake and Sunghoon started senior year in high school, Vivian was diagnosed with uterine cancer- stage four. That year was filled with tragedy and character change from Henry. Though they spent a fortune on hospital bills, Vivian’s health rapidly declined. The two families started accepting the fate that was to come and Vivian came to an honorable death. What made the children’s period of grief insufferable was that the tabloids had picked up the event and started bombarding the Sim family with unrelated questions. It made Jake want to run away.

Around that time, Sunghoon’s family did end up relocating to Taiwan where Sunghoon pursued marine biology (being truly inspired by Henry’s work) and Yeji continued her high school education. Jake flew off to Australia to pursue engineering, despite his father’s wishes, and estranged himself from his family. For over a year, Henry and Jason only got updates about Jake from Sunghoon. Eventually, though, the three made peace.

It had been almost a decade since Vivian passed away and over three years since Jake and Sunghoon completed post graduation from living across the world from each other, yet their friendship still ran strong. They called and texted each other religiously, making sure their friendship lived on through whatever they were doing in life. Being on this research expedition was like a dream for the pair- everything had somehow worked out perfectly.

“Do you miss your mom?” Heeseung found himself asking the Sim brothers.

“Yeah, of course,” Jake shrugged and slumped further into his chair. Sunghoon reached over to comfortingly pat his knee and he cracked him a smile.

“I miss her all the time,” Jason said. “I’d like to think she’s in a better place.”

A long time ago, when Jason first told Y/N about how his mother passed away, she noticed that there was never an air of solemness or pity when he spoke about her. It was tragic and unfortunate, but Jason never let that reflect in himself. He always spoke about his mother with confidence or a smile on his face, celebrating her existence as a smart woman and amazing mother. He never let anyone show him pity about the fact that he lost his mother too young. He simply chose to idolise her, keep her alive through his happiness and through his achievements. She realised, after narrating basically his whole childhood, that Jake was the same. When he spoke about his mother, he didn’t let his voice cloud with pity and he described her with love and adoration.

“Isn’t it lucky that you ended up doing marine engineering?” Sunghoon said to Jake.

“I love engineering but I do love the ocean, too. Shit’s in my blood- dad shat on me for no reason,” Jake rolled his eyes and Jason threw back a piece of crumpled paper at him. Annoyed, Jake bounced his leg up and down. “You know what we forgot to mention?”

“What?” Sunghoon asked.

“Do you remember when Yeji had the biggest crush on Jason?”

With that, Sunghoon let out the biggest groan and threw his head back, hiding his face under his hands. Jason leaped at the memory while Heeseung, Jay and Y/N begged Sunghoon to show them a picture of his sister. Jake started scrolling through his phone to see if he could find any.

“What do you say, Jason?” Jake wiggled his eyebrows at his brother.

“Dude, grow up,” Jason rolled his eyes. “She was a kid.”

“Not anymore! Isn’t she, like, working right now, Sunghoon?” Jake teased.

“I’ll actually kill you,” Sunghoon deadpanned.

“I think they’d make a great couple, though!”

“Dear lord, not this again,” Jason groaned. “The four of us talk all the time, we literally have a group chat. Stop making it weird.”

From what Y/N could gather, this seemed like a conversation the three had frequently. Jake would mention the pairing of Jason and Yeji and Jason and Sunghoon would get riled up and throw a fit. Jake would then continue to list down the reasons as to why should start dating for the millionth time and the other two would turn him down for the millionth time. After seeing a picture of Yeji, she understood why Jake said they would make a great pair.

The first time Y/N saw Jason and Jake side by side, she told them that they looked nothing alike. And they truly didn’t- everyone would always be surprised when they told them they were siblings, only one year apart. Jake had stronger features, a sharper nose, defined jawline, almond eyes, thick lips and curtain-like hair. Jason, however, had lighter features with a button nose, round eyes, fluffy hair and puppy-like lips. They were both handsome, there was nothing to deny, just in polar different ways.

“I think this is a sign for us to sleep guys, It’s gonna be early morning for all of us from here on,” Jason announced and was the first to get up.

Everyone followed him to the sleeping pods, six beds fitted to the walls like bunk beds. If they stared hard enough, the room almost looked like a jail-cell but none of them really took it to heart. They wouldn’t be spending much time there anyway. Y/N slept in the bed above Jason’s and Jake slept opposite to her. That night, she found herself drifting off to sleep while desperately trying to focus on his features, the softness of his expression as he slept.

“This is our first drone test,” Heeseung announced and Sunghoon planted himself beside him with the drone and controller in hand. It had almost been a week since they deployed the hydrophones and it took them a week to perfect how to use them. Improvements were going slower than expected but a majority of the reason for this expedition was to test the new equipment so they learned to not complain as much. Finally, they decided to move on to the next piece of equipment, the drone, that Sunghoon was going to manoeuvre.

“Are we ready?” Sunghoon called. Everyone answered with a hum, dressed in scuba gear in case they needed to dive at the spotting of any whale, they told themselves. In the few days that they were at sea, they found it concerning that they spotted everything but a whale. “Alright, let’s go, then!”

Everyone watched with curiosity, intent and awe as the drone lifted higher into the sky, becoming a speckle of dust to their eyes as Sunghoon controlled it with grace. Jason monitored its camera through his laptop, paying close attention to anything that it could capture. They all stood around watching the screen for around ten minutes, Sunghoon still standing at the edge of the doc as he controlled the drone.

When the fifteenth minute came around, everyone started to lose hope, dispersing to do their respective work with grumbles and sighs. The twentieth minute came around and Jake asked Sunghoon if the new version of the drone was better than the hydrophones. He confirmed with a nod, his lips slightly parted as he concentrated his fingers on the controller and his eyes towards the sky where he could still see the drone. Bored, Jason and Y/N started playing thumb wars and Heeseung and Jay started discussing what the next day’s itinerary would be- Sunghoon let out a gasp.

“Guys, look!”

Everyone ran towards the laptop screen and vaguely, they could see the outline of a large fish, slowly gliding through the ocean currents, around twenty feet away from them. It wasn’t blue- a deep brown and grey, rather. It could have easily been a Bryde’s Whale. At this realisation, everyone elated and Jason ran to check if the hydrophones were picking up any sounds or echoes.

“I’ve got nothing,” Jason shook his head.

”What do you mean? Let me check,” Jay took over and after a few seconds of listening, he too concluded the same thing. “Are you sure the hydrophones aren’t glitching again?” He asked Jake.

“No, I’m sure,” Jake assured.

”Guys, it’s not too far from us. You can go check it out,” Sunghoon hollered to everyone, noticing that the silhouette was moving closer and closer towards the vessel.

Within the next ten minutes, Jay, Jason, Jake and Y/N were diving headfirst into the water. The rush of the ocean engulfed Y/N, the cold making her realise that this was her first time diving in the ocean since her semester on sea during college. The past few years, she’d kept in touch by diving in swimming pools and facilities but this… the real thing was always better.

Bubbles streamed past their bodies as they tried cutting through the water, their goggles making everything hazy as they got used to the pressure. At a distance, they could see the silhouette of what they hoped to be a Bryde’s Whale. Sunghoon and Heeseung kept an eye on them through the video the drone was transmissioning.

For a breathless moment, a moment where they all hoped that it was a whale they were finally seeing, they truly believed that they were in luck. However, as they swam closer to the giant body, theyr recognised its gaping mouth, unhurried movements and pointy fins as something else. For a moment, another breathless moment, they were disappointed, weight filling their chest in a way the ocean’s pressure couldn’t crush them. But seconds later, they decided to enjoy their discovery- Y/N, especially. It was fleeting, barely a few seconds, but it felt like something unspoken passed between them in that shared moment.

“Guys, it’s a Basking Shark,” Y/N said. “Heeseung? Sunghoon? Can you hear me?”

“It’s a Basking Shark, alright,” Jay said, his voice crackling through the earphones before Y/N could receive his words.

“You know the rules, guys. No touching, only looking,” Jason reminded them.

The group of four stopped swimming, floating in the blue abyss and watching the Basking Shark’s movements. It opened its mouth to inhale water- its way of catching food. It stayed open that way, allowing them to get a full view of its insides. White and dark stripes disappearing into its stomach. Slowly, slowly, second by second, the shark swam their direction, as calm as the wind and ocean before a storm. The divers moved to stand out of its way as it swam past them.

“How many feet do you think it is?” Jake asked.

“This is a big one,” Jay said. “I think 30, maybe 33 feet.”

Y/N knew the answer to this question. Normally, she would be the first person leap at answering. But she was too enamoured by the creature as it swam between them, momentarily making her lose sight of Jay and Jason who were on the other side. She could still see the bubbles floating upwards from their breathing. In a moment of poor judgement, she let her fingers raise to inch closer to the fit on the shark, eyes sparkling with eagerness and anticipation. What would it feel like? What would she feel?

As her fingers reached out, inches away from the shark’s rough skin, she felt a hand wrap around her wrist. Startled, she swung her head around to find Jake’s eyes staring daggers at her. Through his mask, she saw him shaking his head. They hovered that way, his hand on her wrist, eyes moving away from each other and towards the shark, watching it drift away from them and the vessel.

The group made their way back to surface, hearts beating with exhilaration. Sunghoon and Heeseung stretched out their arms to help everyone up, fighting the heaviness of the water. “That was amazing,” Jay enthralled as he ripped his mask off.

The other three settled on the deck, backs slumping onto the railings of the vessel as they heaved to catch their breaths. Their masks were thrown beside them and their wetsuits slipped down their torsos. Jake ran his hands through his hair, trying to restyle its shape; Jason forced himself to stand up so he could make his way to the shower; Y/N sat there, unmoving, staring at her bare hands like she’d just woken up from an unbelievable dream. Then, she lifted her head to look at her surroundings, meeting her gaze with Jake as her head turned. He cracked a smile at her and she turned away, embarrassed.

Nine days. It had been nine days since the Basking Shark incident and they were nowhere close to seeing a whale- Blue Whale, Humpback Whale, Sperm Whale… nothing. There was a moment where Jay was convinced he’d picked up the sounds of whales singing but the noise ended up being interference from debris. However, it wasn’t to say that nothing good came out of the past empty days.

The equipment they were testing had come around wonderfully. Everyone, with due time and patience from Jake, started learning how to use the technology and were on their way to perfecting the techniques. One day, a curious Green Sea Turtle surfaced next to the vessel and stared at them for a full minute before diving away. While hauling one of their retrieval baskets, they realised they'd caught an Isopod and it made Heeseung recoil in horror due to its eerie similarity to cockroaches- that day, they found out Heeseung had a huge phobia of insects. Y/N caught a glimpse of a pod of flying fish through her binoculars. Jake caught a glimpse of a Thresher Shark while everyone else was in the lab and he had headed up for some fresh air.

Sunghoon seemed to be some sort of octopus whisperer. A few days ago, he’d spotted a tiny translucent octopus stuck to the side of the vessel and he stretched himself to reach it. It was small enough to fit on his pinky and wrap its tentacles to cover his fingerprint. It was almost transparent, apart from specks of pigment that floated in its body like dust. Its body pulsed softly in his hand, delicate tentacles fanning out onto his palm to test the surface. Then, he slowly lowered it back to the water. On one of their dives, Sunghoon spotted a Blanket Octopus, a rare sighting that would get the media riled up when the footage was released, and he swam after it until he was too far from the vessel.

That morning, Jay woke up to the sight of a pod of dolphins swimming past the vessel, jumping into the air to create dark outlines onto the orange and pink sky. The rhythmic splash of their bodies against the water seemed to stir the rest of the crew from their sluggish morning routines. One by one, they emerged onto the deck—first Jason, then Heeseung and Sunghoon, followed by Y/N and Jake. The usual grumbles of early wake-ups were quickly replaced by soft gasps and murmured excitement as they took in the sight before them.

“That’s what I call a wake-up call,” Y/N gasped.

“Maybe that’s a sign of luck, guys,” Jay offered. “We should do something tonight.”

“Like what?” Sunghoon asks.

Jay perked up. “Like a night dive?”

Sunghoon, who had been taking a sip of water, nearly choked. “Diving?” He coughed. “At night?”

“Why not? We’ve been out here for weeks, and we haven’t done one yet,” Jay reasoned. “The bioluminescence, the different marine life—it’d be an entirely new experience.”

Jason nodded in agreement. “Plus, it’ll be a good change of pace. We’ve been so focused on the whales that we haven’t really taken in everything else around us.”

Heeseung, ever the cautious one, sighed. “You do realize diving at night is way riskier, right? Low visibility, stronger currents—”

“We’ll take precautions,” Jay cut in. “We’ve got the lights, safety lines, and we won’t go too far from the vessel. It’s a controlled dive, not some reckless plunge.”

A moment of silence passed as Heeseung weighed the risks, scanning the eager faces around him. Finally, he exhaled through his nose and shook his head. “Fine. But if anything even remotely goes wrong, we call it and get out. No heroics.”

A round of nods and murmured agreements followed.

“Then it’s settled,” Jay grinned. “Tonight, we dive.”

Excitement buzzed like static as the sun dipped below the horizon. The group prepared for their night dive with thick dive suits and dive computers strapped to their wrists. Jason, ever meticulous, went through each regulator one by one, testing for air flow. "If your regulator sputters, switch to your alternate immediately and signal me," he reminded the group.

Sunghoon handed out waterproof dive torches while Jay and Heeseung secured backup glow sticks to their vests, just in case their primary lights failed. “If it gets too dark, stick close and don’t panic,” Jay advised. “This is a controlled dive, no one goes deeper than 30 meters. Stay within sight of your buddy at all times. If anyone gets separated, stop where you are, shine your light upwards, and wait for us to find you. Do not ascend alone unless it’s an emergency.”

Jay paired with Jason, Sunghoon paired with Heeseung and, like fate had it, Y/N paired with Jake.

Slowly, they approached the edge of the deck, staring down at the ink-black water, the reflection of the stars rippled into infinite nothingness and for a moment, just for a moment, they felt themselves regretting their decision, letting fear conquer their senses. Sunghoon looked at Heeseung, panic and fear glistening against his eyes. Jake, catching his expression from the other end, assured him with a thumb raised in the air and adjusted his mask.

“We got this, guys,” Jake announced, trying to lift everyone’s spirits. “It’s gonna be an experience of a lifetime.”

As the words left his lips, Y/N’s gaze lifted to meet his through the hazy plastic of her mask, her lashes fluttering as hesitation creased her brow. Even through the dim glow of their dive lights, she could see the warmth in his eyes, the way his expression softened—like he was seeing only her in the vastness of the ocean. Then, as if drawn by an unspoken pull, his fingers brushed against her wrist before slipping lower, finding her hand with effortless ease. Slowly, deliberately, he wove his fingers through hers, his grip gentle yet certain. Her breath hitched as she glanced down at their hands—at the way they fit, tethered in the silent depths—before letting her gaze drift back up to him. He wasn’t looking away. He held her there, in the weightless moment suspended between them.

“Just stick with me, yeah?” He whispered to her. “I promise it’ll be the best time of your life.”

“Alright, everyone,” Jay hollered. “Everyone dive in three… two… one.”

What followed were a sequence of splashes and bubbles rising to the surface of the water due to the impact. The first thing they saw was blackness, their eyes still adjusting to the minimal light of their flashlights. As they splashed around, disturbing the calmness of the water, they saw specks of blue- little emeralds glistening at their friction.

“It’s plankton,” Y/N squealed. “It’s bioluminescence!”

“Can’t get better than this, huh?” Jake squeezed her hand, tuning out the excitement everyone else was emulating.

“This is unreal,” Heeseung moved his hand to trigger another spark of bioluminescence, mesmerized by the living light show.

As they descended further, with patience and caution, they saw the silver body of a Barracuda flash by. Startled, Y/N moved closer to Jake, wrapping her wrist around his bicep. Jason, Jay, Heeseung and Sunghoon had moved deeper and the pair followed, eyes spotting clusters of coral reefs with their blooming polyps. From the reef emerged a biofluorescent Hawksbill Sea Turtle, snapping its mouth open and closed in hopes of finding prey. It moved languidly through the water, ignorant of the divers coming closer to it.

“Didn’t think we’d see this today,” Jason said. “Biofluorescence is common in corals and sharks but it’s only been seen in turtles around 2015. Take it in, everyone.”

As everyone tried keeping their eyes on the turtle, already on the verge of leaving their sight, Jay signals everyone to look towards a rocky outcrop. A flash of pale white flickering into deep brown and they hover in place, watching as a cuttlefish pulsated with shifting hues, blending seamlessly into the seafloor before striking at an unsuspecting shrimp. Just a few feet away, a small octopus stretched its arms along the coral, its skin rippling from sand-colored to a deep maroon as it crept toward its prey.

Y/N, captivated, gestured excitedly at the display, her bubbles rising in bursts. Jake caught her expression and grinned behind his mask, watching as she pressed closer to the scene, eyes wide with childlike wonder. Sunghoon, playing the photographer, raised the underwater camera to capture the display of nature’s most skilled shapeshifters. When the creatures finally retreated into the shadows, the group exchanged excited looks before continuing their dive.

As they moved deeper, the ocean’s silence felt heavier, interrupted only by the sound of their own breathing. It felt like they were in a sharksploitation film, the Jaws background music being the only thing missing. As though Y/N’s thoughts were being read, Jason, who had been slightly ahead, froze and pointed his light downward in a startled haze.

Whatever it was that caught Jason’s attention, it was huge and left a trail of bioluminescence in its wake. They could feel it looming just beyond the reach of their lights. A ripple of tension passed between the group as an immense shadow suspended in the water. No one moved- they were sure not one of them was breathing.

Jay’s fingers curled around his dive knife out of instinct, his heartbeat pounding in his ears. Heeseung, usually calm, hovered frozen in place, his eyes darting between the dark shape and Sunghoon, who was holding onto his camera for dear life. Jake exhaled slowly, bubbles escaping in a steady stream as he tried to make sense of what they were seeing, Y/N clinging to his arm to comfort herself. Steadily, Jason tightened his grip on his flashlight and angled the beam forward. The light cut through the darkness, catching the edge of something vast and smooth. The shape shifted, its outline rippling like a ghost emerging from the abyss.

It was a Manta Ray.

At the realisation, their muscles loosened and Jay kept his dive knife away. They watched it swarm past them, its wings stretching impossibly wide. Just like a ghost, it glided through the water like it owned the place, its pale underbelly flashing in the light. It moved like a specter, unbothered by their presence, its cephalic fins unfurling like delicate ribbons as it turned. With the added effects of the blue bioluminescence, it felt like they were watching a dream. Y/N say them all the time in the aquarium but to see them alive, gliding in their natural habitat, was a different kind of sight.

“How big do you think that is?” Jay murmured.

“Five meters?” Y/N answered. “Easily six… she’s huge.”

Jake felt Y/N’s grip on his arm loosen and like instinct, he turned towards her in. He was met with the sight of her in awe, watching the Manta Ray disappear into the void. As they hovered in awe, Heeseung was the first to react. He gestured frantically, his flashlight beam cutting through the water and landing on something just below them. His wide eyes and rapid pointing sent a jolt of confusion through the group. Jay followed the direction of Heeseung’s light, angling his own beam downward.

A Vampire Squid.

It wasn’t supposed to be here. These creatures lived far deeper, in oxygen-minimum zones, not a mere 20 meters below the surface. Yet there it was, its deep crimson body illuminated in their lights, its webbed arms curling inward as it drifted.

Jason exhaled a string of bubbles, exchanging a stunned glance with Jay. Y/N's mind raced—was it sick? Disoriented? Had something forced it to the surface?

Before they could react, the squid suddenly pulsed its body, releasing a shimmering cloud of bioluminescent mucus—a defense mechanism against predators. Tiny blue specks scattered around it like an underwater firework before the creature vanished into the blackness.

The team remained frozen, the eerie afterglow of the squid's defense lingering in the water.

“What the hell was that doing up here?” Jason finally asked through their comms. No one had an answer.

“I’m not getting a good feeling from this,” Heeseung announced. “We’ve seen plenty. I think it’s time to go.”

With steady nods and eager movements, they swam back toward the vessel, an unspoken unease settled between them. A buzz of confusion filled their dialogue when they broke the water and fatigue settled into their bodies. Some looked back at the Manta Ray and awed, others still concerned about why they saw a Vampire Squid so far up the surface, questioning if they should be worried. Jason theorised that it was probably nearing its life-cycle; from what he could see in the passing moments, it looked quite old.

In practiced silence, they stripped off their gear. Masks clattered onto the deck. Wetsuits peeled away with sluggish motions. Someone yawned. One by one, they disappeared below deck—some for a quick shower, others just to sit and breathe.

Y/N, clad in her bikini and a flimsy shirt, found herself sitting on the edge of the deck, her bare feet skimming the water. Each ripple sent a flicker of blue light swirling around her toes—the bioluminescence responding to her every movement. She could hear the guys deep in a conversation on the other side of the deck, discussing the next morning’s regime. She didn't listen in. She just watched the reflection of the stars, absentmindedly swirling her foot through the water, watching the glow chase her movements.

Then, footsteps. She didn’t have to look to know who it was. The air around them shifted as Jake settled beside her, resting his forearms on his knees. For a moment, neither of them spoke, just watching the light dance beneath them. She could see him pouting from the corner of her eyes, a habit she noticed in him before they even started the research expedition.

“Dinner?” She asked, not breaking her gaze away from whatever was in front of her.

He turned to look at her, damp hair falling in front of his forehead. “Yeah, yeah,” he nodded.

“Hey, I have a question,” Y/N found herself chuckling before she could ask him. Slowly, she turned to look at her, shifting her position so that she could lean back on the palms of her hands. “Heeseung doesn’t know you hooked up with his little sister, does he?”

At the question, Jake found himself cackling, too. “What?” He laughed. “No way,” he shook his head. “I think he’d murder me.”

“Yeah, he definitely would,” Y/N agreed. Then, she let a moment of silence pass between them, mustering up the courage to ask him her next question. “What is it about hookups with you, anyway? Just… why so many?”

“Is that who you think of me as?” Jake’s chuckle never left, his eyes widening as he continued. “We just came back from that… interesting dive and you wanna talk about this?”

“It was a bit scary,” she admitted. “I loved it, but I don’t wanna think about it until tomorrow.”

“Fair, fair. Alright, I’ll indulge you,” Jake bit his lip- another one of his many habits- and allowed his gaze to meet hers.

In that moment, in a fleeting split second, the wall that Jake built to keep caution around her had crumbled. All these months, Jake spent trying to be respectful around her, walking on eggshells to try and gain her respect. And somewhere along the way, she started looking at him like he was his own person- not the annoying little brother Jason complained about and not the disappointing son Henry seethed about. She could see the effort he put in, not only for his work or his family, but also for her. She wasn’t sure why. She almost missed his cocky demeanour.

“I don’t know why you’re so against it-”

“I’m not against it,” Y/N defended. “I’m just not that kind of person.”

“Right,” he breathed. “But I guess… well, I suppose I should begin from where it all started,” at that, Y/N chuckled and nodded to coax him to continue. “So, it was the second semester at college and as usual, I was at some house party. By this time, I’d lost my virginity in high school and everything, right? But I hadn’t really slept with anyone in college. So that night, I met this girl- really pretty, really flirty-”

“And you slept together.”

“And we slept together,” he said. “And me, being the fool I was,” Y/N continued laughing, finding his narrative style quite comical. “Thought that maybe she wanted me to call her the next morning. But apparently she didn’t want that. And nineteen year old Jake was heart broken-”

“And he started going to the gym, came out a cocky ass and started sleeping with everyone because some random girl broke his heart-”

“Hey, hey, hey, don’t make fun of me,” Jake nudged her side, leading her to continue laughing. Her eyes struggled to stay open and her smile refused to die. Jake bathed in her joy. “And to be fair, I started going to the gym in high school,” he pointed a finger at her.

“Yeah, okay, whatever,” she grinned and rolled her eyes.

“But, yeah, anyways,” he continued. “I was hurt by it, obviously. And then I told my friends about it and they were all assholes, by the way. Not the kind you want to have long term relationships with. But, yeah, I told them and they kinda brainwashed me into thinking that I got lucky that this was a no strings attached thing. And to be honest, a few days later, I kinda liked the whole idea, too, I guess? And the party I went to after that- hooked up with another girl. And I guess, the cycle just continued.”

Y/N blinked at him for a second, bringing her bottom lip between her teeth. “No one gets hurt?”

“No one gets hurt,” he assured with a shake of his head.

“How would you know, though?” She asked. “The girl in the context- what if-”

“You just kind of know,” he breathed. “You always kinda know. It’s like a sixth sense… only hook up with people you’re sure who want the same things as you. But don’t get me wrong. It’s not that I don’t ever want to settle down. I mean- I’m pushing thirty. It’s just that… I don’t think I’ve found anyone yet.”

Y/N hummed. “The sex is that good?”

Jake’s grin returned, this time a little mischievous, dangerous. His eyes had a sparkle in them, his pointy teeth peeking behind his smile. “Y/N, the sex…” he rumbled, voice low and breath fanning against her ear. He leaned closer to her. “You wouldn’t believe it.”

Y/N gulped.

Assuming his previous position, his grin still plastered on him, he looked her up and down, taking in the tips of her toes that were still touching the water and running his gaze back to her eyes. Perhaps he was being delusional, clouded by the conversation they were having, but he was sure he saw the spark in her- the spark that manifested through her hooded eyes and flushed cheeks. He could see her squeeze her legs together, nails digging into her palms as she chewed her bottom lip. Her gaze stayed on his hands- his hands that were pulsating with his veins, fingers long enough to wrap her around him.

“Don’t tell me you’ve never-”

“No, I have- Jake, I’m pushing thirty, too,” she rolled her eyes, shaking herself out of her daze. A cool wind breezed past them and she could feel her nippled perking through her shirt- she was sure Jake had noticed. “Dated this guy a couple years ago. I met him as a customer in the aquarium, actually. We dated for, like, a year. The sex was good. Jason hated him, though. Said he acted like a frat boy and looking back, I guess he kinda did.”

Watching her shrug and look away, he licked his lips. His breath was near her neck now, his presence ghosting against hers. “Y/N, you deserve better than good sex- whatever that was.”

“And you’re some expert on sex?” She teased.

They didn’t know when the air between them had changed.

Maybe it had started in that moment- when the world was nothing but rolling waves and flickering bioluminescence. Maybe it had started long before that, slipping in between stolen glances across the vessel, lingering eye contact that lasted just a second too long, and quiet moments between chaos that neither of them dared to name.

They’d be lying if they said there was absolutely no tension building between them over the past few weeks. It had been there, simmering just beneath the surface, waiting.

It was in the way he always seemed to be nearby—not in an obvious way, but in a way that made it impossible for Y/N to ignore. If she was adjusting equipment, Jake was there, his arm brushing against hers as he reached for something. If she was rinsing off after a dive, he’d pass by, running a towel through his hair, his skin damp and glistening with seawater. It was the way she felt his presence before she even saw him.

It was the way their bodies gravitated toward each other—shoulders bumping when they worked side by side, fingers grazing when they passed tools back and forth. The way she’d instinctively reached for him during dives, her hand wrapping around his forearm in the darkness, trusting his steadiness as they maneuvered through the water. It was the way he never pulled away.

Maybe it was the way his eyes lingered on her lips when she spoke, or the way she caught herself staring at his hands—the way they moved, the way they curled into fists when he was frustrated, the way they rested so naturally on his neck when he was deep in thought.

It was everything.

Slowly, silently, inevitably, it had been building up to this moment.

Jake found himself hoisting himself back on his feet, rubbing his hands against his thighs to brush off any dust. “I’m gonna try sleeping,” he said, ignoring the laughter that the rest of the boys started filling in the air. Yet, he didn’t move, eyes fixated on her and the way she seemed to curl further into herself. He waited for her to say something- anything that gave him a hint on what was to come next.

“Okay,” she said, finding herself getting back on her feet as well. “I’m gonna sleep, too.”

“Okay.”

The pair stared at each other for a brief second, his eyes darting between her features and hers fixated on his eyes. The air between them was charged with something neither of them dared to put into words. It was a quiet understanding, an unspoken decision made in the space of a breath. Then, with a nod, Jake led her back to the sleeping pods. They moved quickly, their strides quick and deliberate, as if slowing down would give them time to second-guess. Jake barely spared a glance at the others—Heeseung and Sunghoon talking near the railings, Jason and Jay checking something on the equipment—he breezed past them like they didn’t exist.

By the time they reached the sleeping pods, her heart was hammering against her ribs. She watched as Jake stripped off his shirt, catching her widened eyes of shock and explaining to her that he always slept this way. And she watched as he climbed onto his bed, running his hands through his hair and clenching his jaw from what she assumed was frustration. Then finally, finally, after pretending like they weren’t there for a purpose, he looked at her. He looked at her with conviction, slender eyes coaxing her and lips begging for her.

“Y/N…” his exhale spelt out her name.

His rand reached out for her to hold and she looked at his palm- his empty hand that was waiting to be filled with hers, his empty fingers waiting to wrap around her. So, she complied and took his hand, climbing into his bed and adjusting her straddle on his lap. There was silence, mostly just their heavy breaths filling the air, wondering if this was the moment they’d been waiting for- if this is what Jake was hoping for.

She felt his hands creep up her thighs, slowly and surely attaching themselves to her hips, dipping under her shirt to find her waist. His fingers danced on her skin, almost like he was playing a piano, waiting for her to do something other than to hold onto the hem of her shirt.

“Jake?”

“Yeah?”

He could feel her pulsating through her bikini and his dick twitched in his shorts. He gulped as he watched her hands move towards his chest, the cold of her fingertips sending a jolt down his spine. He let her stay that way, her hands exploring the crevices of his chest. Lifting his head that was resting on the wall, he found his neck moving towards her, and she did the same. Their heads tilted, lips parted and eyes hooded- they knew what was to come. They couldn’t wait for it to come.

“I promise you won’t get hurt,” he whispered, just as his lips brushed against hers, their noses touching. His hands moved higher up her torso, touching her ribs just as she let out a ragged breath-

And just as fast as their moment came, it left when they jolted away from each other. They heard footsteps and grumbled murmurs of the rest of the group mumbling it was a good day and goodnight to each other. Panicked, they scrambled off of each other and Y/N was rushing out of his pod and back into her own- anything to make the predicament seem normal, unusual. Before Jay had burst the door open and everyone piled in, Y/N’s head was already on her pillow, pretending to be asleep.

She could hear Jake greeting everyone and wishing everyone a goodnight- she paid no mind. That night, she couldn't sleep.

The group of six had spent almost two months out on the ocean, in the middle of nowhere, on a metal vessel that they’d been calling home, and they’d still hadn’t spotted a whale. However, they felt no sense of discouragement, focusing on testing the new equipment and going on more dives and collecting more samples for research. They collected samples of plankton blooms, recorded the eerie songs of distant marine life, and encountered creatures they never expected—an elusive blanket octopus, a deep-sea jelly drifting near the surface, even a rare oarfish shimmering like a silver ribbon in the depths. The once-crisp excitement of the expedition had softened into something quieter—a steady rhythm of work, patience, and anticipation.

That day was like no other. The air felt no different and the ocean, as usual, stretched infinitely around them. The sky was a perfect, cloudless blue. Jason was at the research station, analyzing the latest data from their dives, his brows furrowed in concentration as he scrolled through results. Sunghoon and Heeseung were near the stern, arguing about whether or not a gull that had landed on their railing was the same one they’d seen three days ago. Annie sat cross-legged on the deck, flipping through her notebook, jotting down observations while absentmindedly twirling a loose thread on her sleeve. Jake was beside her, leaning back on his elbows, quietly watching the sun reflect off the water.

The late afternoon had been slow, peaceful, the kind of moment where time stretched lazily—until Jay stiffened, his head snapping toward the hydrophone. His heart kicked against his ribs as the sound hummed through his headphones, low and distant but unmistakable. Impatient, he holler for Jason who came running to him, questioning what was so important.

“Do you hear that?” He sucked in a breath as he handed the headphones to Jason.

Jason, eyes widened with hope and shock, nodded. “No way,” he breathed. “No way!” He yelled which caught the attention of the rest of the group.

“What is it?” Y/N craned her head to examine the ruckus, watching as everyone had gathered around the deck. Jay came over with binoculars, waving it around in the air. Somehow, without needing any explanation, everyone understood what the excitement was about. It was happening. It was finally happening.

Keeping her notebook aside, she made her way towards the rest of the group, leaning against the railing in anticipation.

“I think they’re a few kilometers away, we should be able to see them soon,” Jay concentrated on his sight through the binoculars, face squirming with concentration.

Everyone simply watched the horizon, waiting for a disturbance to break the surface of the ocean. For a few moments, they saw nothing and Y/N went back and forth from listening to the sound on the headphones, a melody so ancient and otherworldly that it sent shivers down her spine, and looking back at the horizon. She was on the brink of losing hope, watching as Jake and Sunghoon broke apart from the group with their heads hung low, looking at everyone like they were fools for thinking they were lucky until-

It finally happened.

Gasps of awe filled the air as the others scrambled to grab their binoculars and cameras. Sunghoon nearly tripped over a crate in his rush, and even Jake—usually calm and composed—had an unrestrained grin on his face as he followed Y/N to the railing.

A towering column of mist rose into the air, catching the evening light like a shimmering ghost. The sound of the exhale followed a second later, a forceful blast from beneath the waves. The water churned violently as the massive shape surged upward. For a split second, the ocean seemed to hold its breath—then, a whale erupted from the surface. A colossal Humpback Whale launched skyward, water cascading off its slick skin in torrents. The sheer size of it was staggering. Its massive pectoral fins spread wide, and for a breathtaking moment, it seemed suspended in midair—a creature far too large to belong anywhere but the sea, defying gravity itself.

Everyone froze. No one breathed.

Then, in a heartbeat, everyone burst into a rumble of excitement as the whale slammed back into the water, sending an explosion of white foam and waves rippling toward the vessel. The force of it sent their stomachs lurching, but no one cared. Y/N’s hands flew to her mouth, her eyes blown wide.

“Oh, my God,”she said, unable to get her feet to move as Jay had scrambled back to the computer to see what the hydrophones had managed to record. “It’s singing!” Heeseung had screamed repeatedly as Jay fought to not let excitement shake his posture.

Sunghoon bolted for the camera rig, yanking the telephoto lens into place. “Holy shit, that was a full breach! I need a better angle—someone hold this steady!” Heeseung grabbed the tripod as Sunghoon adjusted the settings.

Jason scrambled toward the data log, frantically typing timestamps and environmental conditions into the system. “We need to record the water temp, salinity, GPS coordinates—someone grab the readings!”

As the crew erupted into action around them—rushing for cameras, hydrophones, and data logs—Jake didn’t move. He barely even breathed.

He was watching her.

Y/N stood frozen at the rail, her hands gripping the metal so tightly that her knuckles had gone white. Her eyes, wide and shining under the soft glow of the afternoon sun, stayed locked on the spot where the whale had breached. She looked completely lost in the moment—like the world had narrowed to just her and the ocean. The excitement, the rush, the frantic calls of the others—it all faded into white noise for Jake. He saw her throat move as she swallowed hard, lips slightly parted like she wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words. She didn’t even reach for the binoculars or her notebook. She just stood there and let everything happen.

Jake had seen her fall in love with the ocean over and over again these past few weeks. On the night dive, when she saw bioluminescent creatures flicker to life for the first time. In the quiet hours before dawn, when she let her fingers trail through glowing waters. Each moment had stripped away something guarded in her—had pulled her deeper into the thing she loved most.

And now, as she stood there, wholly consumed by the sight before her, Jake felt something in his chest tighten. She was beautiful like this—untethered, weightless, alive. In a moment of fleeting adoration, Jake wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She leaned into his chest without hesitation, mouth still agape, eyes still locked on the sea. Jake felt her exhale, felt the way her body melted into his. Slowly, confidently, he pressed a kiss to her forehead. His lips lingered, his eyes closing like he wanted to keep this moment exactly as it was. The weight of unacknowledged moments, flickering electricity had shifted into something else over the past few weeks- something, softer, lighter, deeper.

Y/N had stopped second-guessing the way she naturally gravitated toward him, the way her body angled toward him whenever they stood together, the way she reached for him without thinking. And Jake? Jake had stopped holding back.

He still teased her, still challenged her, still made her roll her eyes—but now, his affection was deliberate. When she handed him something, his fingers would brush hers and linger. When she got caught up in her work, he’d bring her water without a word. When she sat alone at night, tracing patterns in the bioluminescence, he’d sit beside her in silence, just to exist in the same space.

Finally, Y/N tilted her head up to look at him, her expression open in a way it hadn’t been before. No teasing smirk, no quick remark—just something warmer, something unspoken but completely understood.

Jake’s lips quirked into a quiet smile. “A lot of firsts for you these days.”

Y/N exhaled a small laugh, nodding.

“Think we should get to work now,” he offered and she meekly nodded.

Jake let her go and moved with quick precision, checked the equipment on deck, making sure the hydrophone was secured and that no water had splashed onto their more sensitive instruments. “Sunghoon, tell me you got that on camera,” he muttered.

“Barely!” Sunghoon yelled.

Y/N stayed close to the railings, keeping her eye out on the huge mass of shadow moving past the surface of the waters, just in case a whale surfaced again.

After spending days with whale songs filling the air, making their mornings, Sunghoon sent out his drone again and detected an entangled whale. After debating whether they were allowed to intervene, something about rules and regulations, they agreed to help the creature. Fear that it would die without sooner intervention and the excitement of being inches away from a whale, possibly being able to touch it, the group devised a plan of action.

Heeseung and Sunghoon stayed on the vessel as look-out through binoculars as the rest manoeuvred a small boat towards the hurting whale. It was only a few feet meters away from them but reaching it through the rough waters seemed like a task, all of a sudden. The waters were usually never this rough- first time in all the weeks they’d been on the ocean.

The water was colder than expected as Jake, Jay and Y/N descended, the massive form of the whale looming beneath them. Up close, the entanglement was worse than they’d thought—thick netting dug deep into the whale’s pectoral fin, restricting its movement. Y/N and Jay worked swiftly, slicing through the strands while Jake positioned himself to keep them steady. The whale remained eerily still, its eye just barely visible through the shifting blue.

Then, without warning, it thrashed, perhaps because of the sudden attention it was getting from foreign presence or perhaps from the pain of entanglement. The sudden burst of movement sent a powerful current surging around them. Y/N was thrown backward, Jay barely managing to steady himself. Jake instinctively reached for her, pulling her close before she could drift further. For a tense moment, they remained suspended in the water, waiting to see if the whale would calm. Slowly, its movements settled, and they resumed cutting. One final slice, and the last of the netting unraveled, drifting away into the depths. The whale hovered for a moment before, with a flick of its tail, it surged forward- free at last- and the three watched as it swam away from them.

“I can’t believe that just happened,” Y/N said. “I can’t believe I just did that- we just did that.”

Upon arriving back on the vessel, the team moved on autopilot—securing equipment, hauling themselves aboard, and stripping off their dive gear. A string of celebratory huzzas were passed around as Y/N slumped against a chair. The air was thick with exhilaration and exhaustion, breaths still uneven from the dive. Sunghoon handed Y/N a towel as she squeezed the seawater from her hair, her mind still in the depths, replaying the whale’s final surge to freedom.

Jason was already hunched over the laptop, fingers flying across the keyboard as he analyzed the recordings. "The change in vocalizations—it's real," he muttered, half to himself, half to Jay, who leaned over his shoulder. Jay's grin was unstoppable. "We’re really hearing this in real-time. That’s insane."

The others busied themselves cleaning up, but the adrenaline was still too fresh to settle. Heeseung cracked open a bottle of water, while Sunghoon replayed drone footage on his tablet, scrutinizing every frame. "We actually did it," he murmured, half in disbelief.

Y/N, however, found herself drifting away from the commotion. She was exhausted and desperately needed rest for her eyes. Her arms went slump and legs felt heavy and when Jake spotted her heaving breath, he made his way towards her, offering himself as a pillow. The pair slumped on each other, Jake running a hand up and down her arm as she drowned out the commotion around her.

“Just a few minutes,” she mumbled and nuzzled deeper into his chest, hugging his torso. Jake chuckled.

Their peace didn’t last long, though. Jake felt it before he saw it, the subtle shift in the air, the way the horizon darkened like spilled ink bleeding into the sky. A low rumble rolled across the sky, so distant at first that no one paid it much mind. But then came the wind—sharp, biting, and sudden. The gentle lull of the ocean turned erratic, the once-glassy surface growing restless beneath them.

A storm was coming. Fast.

“Storm’s rolling in,” Heeseung called from the helm, voice edged with urgency. “We need to secure everything—now.”

Y/N’s eyes shot open as her mind registered what was going on and everyone started moving in sync, doing what their training had taught them to do. Like it came out of nowhere, sheets of rain lashed against the deck, making it nearly impossible to see more than a few feet ahead. The ocean had turned violent, monstrous waves slamming into the vessel with enough force to send them stumbling. Sunghoon and Jay held onto the railings, Jake and Y/N barely finding a way to make it to safety as Heeseung and Jason controlled the steering. They could see them, their faces contorting with strain as they helped each other manoeuvred the wheel.

A rogue wave—towering, relentless—rose like a wall before crashing down onto the deck. The impact sent equipment flying, knocking everyone off balance. A sickening crack sounded through the storm, followed by a sharp, agonized cry.

“Jay!”

As Sunghoon hollered, he ran towards Jay on the unsteady vessel, fully equipped with the knowledge that they could be thrown overboard by the waves and the wind any second. Jay was crumbling against the rain, body twisted in pain as he held onto his forearm. “I think I broke it,” he repeated over and over again as Sunghoon carried him towards Jake and Y/N.

Jake and Sunghoon exchanged a look that Y/N couldn't decipher, a sort of language the two friends had accumulated through their years of friendship. When the vessel rocked again, Sunghoon grabbed Y/N’s arm and tried his best to get them inside- to safety, hopefully. Jake dashed the opposite direction, towards the wheelhouse.

“Where is he going?” Y/N yelled over the winds and the thunder that started to crack, crouching out of instinct though she knew it wouldn’t be much protection. Another wave crashed against the vessel, water flooding the deck. The rain fell harder above them, leaving them no mercy. They were being tossed around like a

“Distress signal,” Sunghoon shouted back, holding Jay in place amongst the imbalance.

The storm swallowed the horizon whole, a monstrous force of wind and water that turned the sky into an endless void of grey. The waves surged like biblical monsters, heaving and crashing against the vessel with relentless fury, each impact rattling through steel and bone alike. The world had shrunk to chaos—water seeping into every crevice, bodies thrown against railings, desperate hands gripping whatever they could to keep from being flung into the abyss.

“Sunghoon, we’re not gonna make it,” Y/N could feel her tears, tears of fear and defeat, mixing with the rain, eyes squinting as she searched for him amongst the fog.

“No, Y/N,” Sunghoon yelled. “We’re gonna make it.”

Somewhere, through the deafening roar of the storm, a voice crackled through the radio—a lifeline lost in static—before the darkness was split apart by a piercing beam of light.

The helicopter had arrived.

The harsh fluorescent lights buzzed overhead, a stark contrast to the wild, untamed darkness of the storm they had just survived. The six of them sat scattered around the hospital room, their bodies aching, their minds still reeling from the chaos that had led them here. The sterile scent of antiseptic filled the air, but beneath it lingered the salt of the ocean, a reminder that no matter how far they were from that vessel, the sea was still etched into their skin.

Jay sat in the center of it all, his arm immobilized in a sling, bruises painting his skin in deep purples and sickly yellows. He looked exhausted, but there was a ghost of his usual grin on his face as he tried to downplay the pain. “I guess this means I get out of heavy lifting for a while,” he joked, but no one laughed.

Because they all remembered.

They remembered the way the waves had swallowed the vessel, tossing them like rag dolls. The helplessness of gripping onto whatever they could, praying they wouldn’t be swept away. The panic when Jay had been thrown across the deck, a sickening crack cutting through the chaos. The way he had screamed. The frantic, trembling hands trying to keep pressure on his injury, the desperate voices yelling into the radio for help, the sheer terror that, for a moment, they might not all make it out.

Sunghoon sat at the edge of his hospital bed, staring at the floor with his elbows on his knees, fingers interlocked so tightly his knuckles were white. Jason and Heeseung murmured in hushed tones with a doctor at the doorway, nodding stiffly at whatever instructions were being given.

And then there was Y/N.

She sat beside Jake, her head resting against his shoulder, eyes open but unfocused. Her hands were clasped together in her lap, like she was grounding herself, trying to convince herself that they were safe now. That it was over.

Jake hadn’t let go of her since they had been pulled out of the storm. His grip on her hand was firm, like if he let go, she might disappear. The adrenaline had long worn off, leaving behind only exhaustion and the silent, heavy weight of everything they had endured.

For the first time in months, there was no vessel beneath them, no swaying of the ocean, no distant songs of whales humming through the water. Just the quiet hum of the hospital and the echo of a storm that still raged inside them. For the first time, Y/N wondered, had they all gone crazy without knowing it? She’d seen documentaries about this- how people stranded in a single environment could descend into a state of psychosis. Did that happen to them, sickness right under their noses?

When the doctor made her way towards the group, everyone lifted their heads and sat straight, reacting as though a professor had just walked into the classroom. Dr Ryu looked at them sternly, an absence of sympathy and solemness in her demeanour. Perhaps that is exactly what they needed. “You guys got lucky,” she said. “It could have been worse.”

Everyone responded with a sequence of nods, Jay wincing as he moved the wrong muscle. Jason shifted to his side, resting his hand on his back as support and comfort.

“Physically, you all should be fine. A quick recovery- Jay included,” Dr Ryu continued. “However, I highly recommend visiting a therapist. By the looks of it, this wasn’t something easy that you all had to go through and you now show increased vulnerability to PTSD or any related disorders. Please do take my advice seriously.”

Again, she was met with a sequence of nods and mumbles, assuring her that they would do their best in taking care of themselves and each other.

“We will keep Jay in for the night for observation,” Dr Ryu said. “Any of you can stay with him. The rest of you- go home. Go home to your families and just be in a more familiar space. Try to sleep- staying awake all night and mulling over it will not help. Your bodies are exhausted. Give it a rest and come back tomorrow.”

As she walked away from the group, a moment of silence fell over them as they went over what the doctor had said. PTSD? Who knew this was the turn their lives would take? To be fair, she only advised a therapist- there was no guarantee for anything at the moment.

“I’ll stay,” Jason said. The decision was made without much debate. Friends since a trip went wrong during university, it made sense that he stayed back. While working on a coastal biodiversity project, their boat engine failed during a data collection run, leaving them stranded at sea for hours. They were rescued by helicopters that day, too and looking back, their situation now looked eerily similar- just without the injury and the trauma.

Jason had already straightened in his seat, his expression leaving no room for argument. Jay rolled his eyes but didn’t protest. “You guys should go get some actual sleep. My apartment’s closer to the hospital anyway- you should spend the night there, give each other company.”

No one had the energy to argue.

Sunghoon sighed, rubbing a hand down his face. “I’m gonna pass out the second I hit a bed.”

“Same,” Heeseung muttered, already gathering what little belongings they had brought with them.

Y/N glanced at Jake, who had been uncharacteristically quiet. He still hadn’t let go of her hand, his thumb absentmindedly running over her knuckles. His eyes flickered toward Jason, something unreadable crossing his expression.

Jason caught it. “Don’t even think about staying, Jake,” he said, voice softer now but still firm. “You look worse than Jay.”

Jake huffed a quiet laugh, but Y/N felt the tension in his grip. He didn’t want to leave. None of them really did, but Jason was right- they needed rest, and Jay was in good hands.

Y/N squeezed his hand, a silent reassurance, before standing up. “We’ll be back first thing in the morning.”

Jason gave a small nod. “I’ll text you if anything happens.”

With that, they filed out of the room, exhaustion making their movements sluggish. The police drove them to Jason’s apartment and the second they opened the doors, Heeseung and Sunghoon occupied the guest bedroom and Jake dragged himself into Jason’s bedroom. Y/N found herself frozen in the bathroom, staring at herself in the mirror. She felt like a fool for feeling the way she did, for being naive enough to think that she could get past this like it was a bad birthday party.

Upon entering the room Jake was in, she found him sitting cross legged on the bed, back hunched over as he toyed with something on his phone. When he felt her presence, he kept his phone away and shifted his gaze to her. He patted the empty space beside him, coaxing her to sit with him and she did. She let her head hit the pillow and Jake leaned against the headboard, eyes falling on the ceiling. It was weird not catching sight of a night sky filled with stars- almost unfamiliar.

“I can’t stop thinking about it,” he whispered, almost as if saying it quieter would make their predicament lighter.

“I know,” she responded. “It doesn’t feel real,” she rested her hand against his shoulder, softly rubbing his back in hopes of comforting him. He leaned his cheek against her hand, raising his own to hold hers and closing his eyes to find solace in the moment.

“Everything’s gonna be alright,” he mumbled.

“Everything is alright,” she tried. “We’re all here, alive and safe. Jay is fine.”

“Jay is fine,” he repeated.

“And we are fine.”

“You almost died.”

Y/N leaned up and rested against the headboard with him, deliberately keeping her face close to his, breaths syncing. Jake’s eyes stayed close, his cheek still on her hand. “But I didn’t,” she said, with conviction.

“You were slipping away.”

Y/N didn’t know how to respond. The weight of it sat between them, heavy and unspoken. She knew that feeling. The terror of helplessness. The way it lingered in your bones, no matter how many times you tell yourself you survived.

She shifted, sliding closer, until their knees brushed. “But I’m here,” she murmured.

Jake lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to her palm, and something inside her stirred. “I need to feel it,” he said, almost to himself. “That you’re here. That this is real.”

His hands found her waist, tentative and fragile at first like that night in the sleeping pods, testing the waters, walking on eggshells. When she moved closer to him, finding herself straddling his waist again, Jake found no motive to stop. He leaned upwards to find her lips, mouths colliding without hesitation- there was no adultery, no ploy of teasing or hurting, no uncertainty. They were two people, finding an anchor within each other, desperately holding on.

When he finally kissed her, Y/N wondered why it took so long for them to be in this position in the first place. And he kissed her with caution, slow movements memorising her crevices and making sure she remembered him. As their mouths opened and closed in sync, his hands roamed underneath her shirt, tracing her skin and counting her ribs before lifting her shirt over her head. In that moment, while he held her, she didn’t feel lusted over or sexualised- she felt as though she was being protected, cherished… loved.

“Y/N… I don’t just want you,” he breathed against her, lips moving down her throat and hands roaming her legs. “I need you.”

Slowly, wrapping his arms around her back, he flipped her over so she lay on the bed and he hovered over her. For a brief moment, he stopped to look at her face- her eyes that were filled with curiosity and anticipation, lips parted in waiting for him, hair strewn across the pillow. Then he kissed her again, one hand roaming towards her nippled and the other swiftly unzipping her jeans. In this moment, though he usually wouldn’t prefer to, Jake wasted no time- he didn’t want to tease her or waste his time with foreplay. He just wanted to feel her, know that she was living in his arms, breathing and letting her heart beat against him.

His hand shifted to move her jeans off her legs and Y/N shimmied out of them, chuckling in the process. “This isn’t that attractive,” she murmured.

“Shut up,” he said with a grin and kissed her again.

He let his fingers hook under her underwear and touch her clit. Y/N moaned into his and he moaned back, feeling the wetness of her folds and letting her back arch into him. Her hips grinded against his hand and he complied by exploring her folds, slowly and desperately getting her to whine and moan more under him.

“Heeseung and Sunghoon are sleeping,” Jake mumbled against her skin, lips exploring the nape of her neck and moving to the curve of your breasts. “You’ve gotta try to be quiet, yeah?”

“Okay,” she heaved and Jake could feel her nod, her chin touching his hair.

He slipped a finger into her hole and she squirmed, biting her lip to adjust to the length. Her hands flew towards his hair, tugging and pulling at the silky tufts. He moved his finger in and out, languidly and deliberately, eyeing your reactions and expressions as he did so. His thumb flew to her clip, rubbing steady circles only for more wetness to ooze out of her.

“Higher, Jake,” he heard her moan and he increased his pace. The sound of squelching filled the room, mixed with their moans. He kissed her again, his other hand continuing to toy with her nipples while he fingered her- now, fast and dirty, aiming towards a goal. He could feel her clenching on his fingers, clamping down everytime he pulled out too much, whimpering every time he curled at the right spot.

Jake moved so he could kneel between her legs, his fingers now moving slower as he brought his face closer to her heat. She could feel his breath on her, only making her ache for him more. She whined for him to hurry up and was only shut up when she felt his mouth on her. He sucked on her clit as his finger picked up pacing, adding a second one as her breath got heavier. He could see her chest heaving, her hands flying upwards to grip the headboard.

When her knees started closing instinctively, his shoulders kept them apart, one hand gripping her hip so tight she was sure she’d have bruises the next morning. And he kept going, sucking and flicking at her clit with his tongue, fingers moving in and out of her so fast that she’d forgotten how she ended up here in the first place.

“I’m so close,” she moaned. “So close.”

And just as she felt her high crashing down on her, he’d withdrawn himself completely and she let out a gasp. Her brows furrowed, she tilted her head to find Jake stripping his own clothes and she stared at the way his chest glistened under the moonlight, his dick springing out of his boxers as he moved to hover over her again. His hair fell onto his forehead and her hands moved to tuck it under his ear. She placed an innocent peck on nose, cheeks, forehead and chin before moving to his lips again, waiting for him to do something before getting annoyed at her lack of orgasm.

“Brace yourself, alright?” He whispered into her mouth and she felt his tip aligning to her entrance. He looked at her before going any further, waiting for a confirmation. When she nodded, he pushed himself into her and the pair moaned in unison.

“Is this the great sex you were referring to?”

“You can’t deny it.”

As he thrusted into her, sharp and with purpose, she regretted wanting to tease him or get a laugh out of him. She let out a gasp, followed by an incoherent string of moans as he thrusted in and out of her, his hand caressing the back of her head and her nails scratching his back. She wrapped her legs around his waist, a desperate way to feel him deeper inside her. He buried himself in the nape of her neck, peppering kisses behind her ear while she did the same to his shoulder.

“Faster,” she moaned and he complied, forgetting the slow and romantic pace he wanted to go with and pounding into her faster, harder- anything and everything to get her to cum with him. He let a hand slip in between their bodies, fingers finding her clit and rubbing briskly and whispering sweet lulls into her ears.

“You gotta cum with me, yeah?” He said and she could only nod, throat too preoccupied with the moans she couldn’t hold back.

She felt the knot in her stomach building again, back arching further and pussy clenching harder onto is dick- he could feel it too, that she was close. She threw her head back, waiting for the moment to fall upon her, waiting for him to say something. He only went faster, letting the hinges of the bed creek.

“Y/N?” She responded with a frustrated hum. “Cum with me- cum for me.”

And she did, letting her orgasm spill over her body and she could feel him inside her, filling her up to the brim. Jake moaned, feeling her body shudder at the way he fucked her, her eyes meeting his with desperation and ache.

“Jake…” she whined as he placed her body comfortably on the mattress again, falling on the empty space beside her and wrapping his arms around her torso. “So good,” she breathed, unable to unclutter her thoughts.

“I know that was supposed to be depression sex, but wow,” he said into her neck.

Y/N raised a lazy hand to hit him on the head. “Stop being funny,” she groaned and he laughed.

Jake, Y/N, Jason, Heeseung, Jay and Sunghoon stood in a line in front of Henry Sim. Over the past few weeks, they’d met with him a plethora of times- just to talk, not even about technical things, just talk. It was his way of looking out for them, taking care of them in whatever way he could. He offered to buy them meals, pay their therapy and hospital bills and even offered them a stipend if they needed it- all out of guilt and desperation to help them heal better, not knowing what else to do.

He was never critical, even praising their work to a large extent. And in all honesty, he was proud- it was great work. “This information that you all have gathered is valuable, I hope you know that,” he said to them, holding their report in hand.

“Yes, sir,” they answered in unison.

“It still feels unreal. Like we’re supposed to wake up tomorrow and check the equipment again,” Sunghoon said.

Jay chuckled, adjusting the sling on his arm. "Speak for yourself. I’d rather not get thrown around another boat for a while."

Heeseung smirked. "You’re just mad the whale was stronger than you."

Sunghoon, who had been absentmindedly fidgeting with the strap of his camera bag, let out a small laugh, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. The energy in the room had shifted, nostalgia seeping in through the cracks.

Henry exhaled through his nose. "The ocean doesn’t let anyone walk away the same. You six will carry this experience with you—whether you realize it now or not."

Jake, who had been quiet until then, glanced at Y/N. She met his gaze, and for a moment, the past months condensed into something unspoken but understood. The storm. The breach. The long nights and quiet moments. The feeling of something beginning even as something else ended.

Noticing their interaction, Henry cleared his throat. “The least I was expecting was the pairing of these two,” he pointed between Jake and Y/N. The rest of the group cackled.

“They thought they were being so slick,” Heeseung laughed. “We noticed everything.”

Rolling their eyes, Jake and Y/N continued to grin at everyone's smiling faces. The aquarium lights flickered slightly as a school of fish glided past the large tank beside them. It was a strange, almost poetic parallel—them, sitting still in this room, while life outside moved on without waiting.

Jason grimaced at the idea of his brother and best friend dating. Attempting to change the conversation, he cleared his throat. “So what now?”

The question hung heavy in the air as the group of six looked at each other. They knew what was to come- a set of interviews, press releases of what they experienced and perhaps even a short YouTube documentary. But what was to happen to their lives? What were they to expect?

No one wanted to answer that question. All they knew was that outside, the ocean awaited their return.

[patscorner]

Hey, idk if your taking requests rn but could you do an Emily Engstler x chubby reader fic where reader is in her feelings about a personal subject of your choice and they end up arguing over it? Idk just some angst and fluff please?

I don't really like how this turned out, but here you gooo

Butterflies

Summary: When you receive hate, instead of getting the calm, gentle response from your girlfriend, you get an unexpected reaction.

wc: 1,099

Contains: talks of insecurities, two kisses, that's all

______________________________

You sigh as you put your car in park. Finally, after a day in hell(at work), you were home. For some reason, everyone and their mom decided to test you today. Ranging from customers cussing you out, to Emily being cranky before you left for work, the day seemed to be giving you a break.

Even though you and your girlfriend had bickered all morning, right now, you wanted nothing more than to be in her arms. But before you do, you decide to open instagram. Bad idea. There were multiple hate comments on your post about how you looked in a bathing suit. You weren't the biggest person in the world, but you also weren't the skinniest. You've never been skinny, and you were often judged for that rather than your cheerful personality. So, like most bigger kids, you were bullied when you were younger, causing you to have low self confidence and self esteem.

Eventually, you grow to love your body, and it only gets better when you start to date Emily. She thought you were the most gorgeous person in the world, and she made sure you knew that.

Of course, it wasn't always smooth, and you had your days. Like now.

The post was from a month ago, when Emily surprised you with a trip to Mexico. Normally, they wouldn't affect you, but after the day you had, the words displayed on your screen found cracks in your armor and buried itself there, finding its way under your skin and into your heart.

You sigh heavily, blinking back tears as you get out of the car and locking it behind you. You take a deep breath as you unlock the door to your shared apartment with Emily.

You hear her yelling from the bedroom as you place your keys on the counter. You make your way into the room and see she's on the game with a couple of her teammates. “Hi, baby.” She mumbles, glancing at you before she draws her attention to the screen.

You don't say anything back, just grab your clothes and go to the bathroom to change. This sets alarms off in Emily's head, but unfortunately, the game she's playing has already put her emotions on ten and her patience on zero.

“What the fuck?” You hear her mumble. You roll your eyes, before changing and walking back out into the room. She's not on the game anymore, instead, she's sat on the end of the bed, with her arms crossed. You close your eyes and sigh when you see her, you truly don't have the patience.

“What the fuck is your problem? You came home pissed, and didn't even say hi to me.” She squinted her eyes at you.

You don't say anything, and just sit down next to her, hoping she'd relax at the sight of your need for comfort. She doesn't.

“I'm sorry. I’m not feeling the best, I was on Instagram and there were comments an-” Emily cuts you off with a laugh as she stands up.

“Are you serious? I told you to stay out of the comment sections. You're asking for it at this point.” She scoffs.

The statement takes you by surprise. Your normally gentle girlfriend was standing in front of you, her anger directed at you. “I'm ‘asking for it’?”

Then it clicks for Emily, as her eyes soften and she tries to take her statement back. “That's not what I me-”

Now it's your turn to cut her off. “Bullshit, you meant it. I didn't ask for any of this. I didn't ask to look like this, and I didn't ask to be treated like this either.” You stand up, a move towards the door, tears streaming down your face. You stop before you close the door and lock eyes with Emily.

Her eyes are guilty, looking down at her feet. “I'm sleeping on the couch.” You sigh. She looks up like she wants to say something, but closes her mouth instead.

“I love you.” She whispers. “I love you too.” You respond before going into the living room.

You stir in your sleep, feeling yourself being lifted from the couch. You open your eyes and look up to see Emily carrying you bridal style back to your room. “Shh, go back to sleep, ma.” She whispers, kissing your head.

You groan as she gently puts you down on your side of the bed. She mimics your actions, laying down next to you, wrapping her arms around you, so you're facing her. Sleep has left you now, and you're both just staring at each other.

“What're you doing?” You whisper. Emily's heart breaks as she takes in your features. Your eyes are red and puffy, and your hair is disheveled from the amount of times you ran your hand through it.

“Couldn't sleep.” She mumbled, pulling you closer. You melt into her arms, finally getting the embrace you needed earlier.

“I'm so sorry, baby. What I said was fucked up. I was still hype from the game, and I shouldn't have spoken to you like that.” She places an apologetic kiss on your lips, so light it was almost ghostlike.

“ ‘s okay.” You mutter.

“No it's not. I'll do better, I promise. It'll never happen again.” She said, forcing your eyes on hers. The words you read earlier flash through your mind, and your breathing hitches as you close your eyes, attempting to stop the tears, but it's no use.

She sighs as she watches you break down, and she can't help but feel like she caused some of it. She pulls you closer, her tattooed hand rubbing circles up and down your back.

“They're wrong. You are the most beautiful woman in the entire world, and I'm not gonna stop telling you, not until you believe it. And even then, I'll continue to tell you. Because it's true. Those motherfuckers don't know you. Not like I do, and they never will. “

She pauses to wipe your tears, kissing your cheeks gently. “I love you so much, and no matter what they say, I always will. D’you understand?” her eyes locked with yours, waiting for your response.

You sniffle, nodding slowly. Emily shakes her head. “Words, baby.” She whispers.

You feel your cheeks heat up, and by the way Emily tries to bite back a smirk, you know she did it on purpose. “I understand. I love you too.”

With that she pulls you into a passionate kiss, lips interlocking as she takes your insecurities away, replacing them with butterflies.

______________________________

taglist: @wintersstan @bueckerslover @lilia22hicks @fake-intelligences @girlokwhatever @pbloverr @breeloveschris

[xia0mi-c0m]

The proshipping problem in the twst fandom | A rant.

Very obvious trigger warning for things normal for proshippers like p3dophilia, incest, etc.

Though I do know proshippers will be in every single fandom, it's getting especially worse in the twst fandom, specifically the Japanese side of the fandom (with some discussions about some in the English side too).

Before any proshippers come into the comment section: Proshipping is NOT a healthy coping mechanism. If your therapist recommended it, they should be fired.

This post is not to dehumanize and degrade underage proshippers as they have been obviously groomed into believing that it was okay to ship this sort of stuff.

The actual elephant in the room we WILL be shunning is the adult proshippers who actively encourage children (either actually or under law) to proship.

Before getting fully deep in this subject, I would like to admit something that I've talked about before.

I was a proshipper when I was younger than what I am now. This was because, not getting into too much detail, I was groomed by a man online to the point that i thought it was okay.

Not only was I a proshipper but I was also a darkshipper, problematic comshipper, and also supported the things present in Dead Dove fanfics.

In fact, I had an account on some sort of forum page with other proshippers and I shared my nasty ships there. I believed it was a good way of desensitizing myself to my trauma that fucked me up heavily, but it wasn't and it was making me relive the same trauma which in return, made it worse.

This is why I say that I do not want anyone to shun underage proshippers, they were groomed into it half of the time.

Now that I'm 18 (About to turn 19 on February 14th), I finally understand that proshipping is an unhealthy way of approaching your trauma and pain.

It may feel like it does something, but it really doesn't. And I want to reassure you that you're not alone in your pain, please, find other ways to cope and process what has happened to you that doesn't include glorifying very nasty things.

Now with that out the way, I would like to say what the title says.

Proshippers in the twst fandom has sadly grown overtime, but my niece made a very good point; stating that since twst does have a slightly dark story, that people with dark and nasty thoughts and ideas will be attracted to it, much like a moth to a flame that damages it's already fragile body.

There have been adults in the twst proshipper area, and I think they're the main cause of fueling minors in the fandom to do the same thing. Maybe with or without knowing the eventual psychological consequences.

The adults who are aware sadly lure and prey on the gullible underage individuals of the fandom, and though that might seem like an overexaggeration; it sadly is true.

I am Japanese, well, half-Japanese. But even then, due to that fact, I'm more prevalent in the Japanese fandom than the English fandom though I am trying to balance out both.

Since I am more present in the Japanese side of the fandom than I am with the English side (because I'm basically like an absent dad that went off to get the milk and never came back until years), I have seen a lot of shit in here and it's very scary even to this day.

Though the English side of the fandom is as equally bad, the Japanese side is worse with the whole l0li and sh0ta thing. Sadly I have seen English twst accounts do those things too.

The most popular proshipper you may know is Ugigi or however the fuck you spell her name, whether one likes to admit it or not, her selfships were very much proshipping. This is mainly due to how her OC could've been her actual age which was in her 20s if I'm remembering correctly.

But let's say the OC wasn't, it would still be problematic (but not in the proship way) since the characters she drew NSFW of were mainly the minors (again, if I remember correctly). If her OC was her actual age then she would be a proshipper.

However, watever the age of the OC she always drew, it's obvious that it was still leaning more on proshipping because that indicates that she's attracted to the characters despite knowing they're minors (and not even aging them up by the way).

So, very nasty, I was thinking of putting her In the TWs 😭

All jokes aside, proshipping is disgusting.

In fact, must I bring up any other thing?

LEECHCEST.

WHAT.

Well, you heard that right, people ship Floyd and Jade. Seriously, what is wrong with you guys. And I think I know why this ship is so popular in the Japanese fandom; The fact incest is not necessarily illegal in Japan in a way.

Yeah. You heard me correctly. I'm horrified and scarred for life <3

"Surely there isn't anymore I shall talk about, right? Right?? RIGHT?!?" I exclaim, not expecting anything else to come from the sky and hit me.

Then boom..

SHROUDCEST.

OH FUCK NOT AGAIN.

So, apparently people ship a dead robotic little boy with his big brother.. yeah... FNAF fandom called, they're telling you not to steal their bit much like how Deejus is trying to tell Johnny RaZeR not to steal his "YOUTUBEEE" outro bit that.. he also stole.

It can't get any worse than this, right? This is definitely the last tier of the iceberg, surely? Perhaps??-

KINGSCHOLARCEST.

Okay, now we're pushing it, this bit is getting old but whatever.

Kingscholarcest can refer to three (disgusting) "ships": A nasty ship of Cheka x Leona, a nasty ship of Falena x Leona, or a nasty ship of Falena x Leona x Cheka.

Sweet home Alabama all around but more extreme..

I think we all know why these ships are not okay and are disgusting (ESPECIALLY CHEKA X LEONA SINCE CHEKA IS A GOO GOO GA GA BABY.)

Finally.. It's over.. I can go back to ranting!-

FELLOW X GIDEL.

JESUS CHRIST STOP.

This madness needs to stop because if not I'm going to pull my fucking hair out!-

LILMAL, SILVER X LILIA, S-

OKAY STOP IT RIGHT HERE,, THE BIT IS OLD NOW.

So, I think you get my point.

Borderline incestuous ships, the drake specialty, and straight up sweet home right to Alabama.

Now, let's put aside the jokes and get serious again.

With all the things I have stated, you can definitely see the absolute horror of some parts of the fandom.

There's accounts that are VERY hypocritical, saying "P3dos DNI" when they are a sh0ta/l0licon. This is the literal definition of hypocrisy at it's finest.

There are mfs who have unironically said that Cheka was hot and romantically cute.. HE'S 7 YEARS OLD. OR MAYBE YOUNGER. I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER BUT I DO KNOW HE IS A CHILD.

I have said this MANY times before and I'll say it again; if that characters looks like a child, THEY ARE A CHILD.

Even if you age up characters like Ortho, Cheka, etc. You are still self-reporting that you're attracted to a literal child.

Fiction DOES affect reality no matter if you try to plug your mickey mouse ears with your fingers (or paws, I don't know) to gaslight yourself into believing it doesn't truly affect it.

In fact, there have been cases where people have been arrested for having l0li/sh0ta on their devices, though, sadly, its not a long sentence despite how it should be lifelong.

But even without the lifelong sentence, the law still considers l0li/sh0ta CSAM. (I hate calling it CP now since that implies that kids can do that in their own will.)

A grown adult proshipper even told me when I criticized Kanna from dragon maid for being a little girl the author sexualizes to no end all because I said that she doesn't have a listed age that I was being "contradicting" and I think this proves that.. proshippers DON'T know what contradictions ACTUALLY are because they've gaslit so much into believing this disgusting behavior is normal and okay to do.

And don't get me started on Dead Dove cai, chai, etc. bots and fanfics.

Dead Dove, proshipping, problematic comshipping, darkshipping, doveshipping, etc. doesn't give out awareness to the horrors of such depraved acts.

Another very nasty thing I've seen in the TWST fandom is people shipping the staff with the students, mainly Crewel with Deuce.

Teacher x Student is disgusting no matter what. Teachers are always more grown than the students, so yeah, teachers aren't the anime boy or girl of your dreams or something, he or she's going to be old and otherwise not "attractive" and young.

The training to become a teacher and any profession in fact will take years, which means you'll grow and turn old.

I understand many say "Well, it's just fiction!" but these people seem to forget that young individuals, especially young girls, can see these teacher x student fiction and will probably, in the worst case scenario, get the wrong impression from it, ESPECIALLY if the media glamorizes and romanticize it, and sadly become a victim.

Crewel, If I'm not wrong, is 31 meanwhile Deuce and the other first years that [Crewel] mainly gets shipped with are 16 years old.

This is not only a disgusting, vomit-inducing age gap but huge maturity gap whether one likes to admit so or not.

Yanderes especially in the twst fandom get romanticized, and people seem to forget the reality of the abuse that yanderes put their "love interest(s)" through.

And I think this is why fandoms (not just twst) should stop romanticizing yanderes and student x teacher, and vice versa.

Besides, these two tropes are grooming even if the victim is not a minor, adults and the elderly alike can also be groomed especially if they're gullible and need to depend on someone (for either a disability or something).

People will probably invalidate my point but I don't budge from what I said.

Sorry if this posts looks rushed and/or maybe even incoherent to some, I just wanted to get this off my chest and stuff.

I should start ranting more, I like yapping so yeah, expect more whenever I'm bored :3

Anyways, BAIIII!!

YOUTUBEEEEEE flies away into the void to the right

[a-certain-romance]

Can’t Help Falling

Characters/Ships: gn!reader x Yae Miko, Lisa, and Jean (separate). Pre-relationship for Miko’s part

A/N: Sorry to have kept this ask in the dark for so long D: the fluff was super fun to write!!

“You are like a walking fire hazard”

You wince at her harsh comparison, though she does have a point. The Narukami shrine is just so tall and steep, you can’t help but trip every now and then walking to and fro. Not that it’s much different when you’re on flat ground.

“You have a perfectly shaped fox tree yet you can’t have the trail be paved?,” you argue, right before you lose your footing and slip. Miko’s reflexes were fast enough to catch you at the very last second before you could tumble to the ground. Her arms circled your waist as if she were dipping you in the final moments of a couples dance.

“Oh now this feels familiar,” She taunts. “Are you intentionally using light novel tropes against me to gain my attention?” Her eyebrow raises, and you begin to feel smaller under her gaze. “You really don’t need to try that hard” she tsks before setting you back on your feet.

You awkwardly apologize before standing up straighter. “It won’t happen again.” She only hums in response, walking past you. “Come along now,” she beckons with a swish of her tail, “it’s going to take more than a simple cliché to win me over.”

“Oh hi cutie~”

Lisa’s lazy smile brightens at your entrance into the library. She’s sitting at a table with Razor across from her, books and loose papers spread out in nearly placed sections.

“Razor, don’t you want to say hi?” She asks. Razor remains seated on his side of the table. “They have bad luck, like Bennett.” He says bluntly, but nods anyways.

Lisa snorts, and your face flushes in embarrassment. “I’ll come find you when we’re done.” She turns back to Razor, a fond smile playing at her lips now that she knows you’re close by.

Unlike your other visits to browse the isles or talk with Lisa, you were on a mission. You needed a book. One that of course you realized was sitting on one of the top shelves— taller than you could ever reach. Maybe Razor’s comment held some truth. Deciding you didn’t want to interrupt Lisa’s one-on-one time with the wolf boy, you set a nearby ladder against the shelf and began to climb.

“I’m all finished with Razor if you still wanted to chat—“ her voice catches you off guard and you quickly lost your balance. The ladder falls and you go with it. But instead of hitting the hard flooring, you fall into something much softer. A sigh of relief escapes your lips but it’s quickly replaced by a loud yelp.

An electro shock runs through your body that only Lisa’s narrowed eyes can explain. “Darling, if you need my help please just tell me. I’m here for you, all you need to do is ask.” She ruffles your hair fondly. “Let me move this ladder and then we can have our regular tea break, okay?”

“Jean, I think you should carry the basket.”

A picnic at Windrise was just what you both needed. You were always one to encourage Jean to take more days off, and a nice lunch in nature was the most idealistic experience you could think of. But in retrospect, the idea seemed much better in your head. You’ve already lost count of how many times you stopped yourself from falling down to the grassy terrain.

Next to you Jean laughs and stops to hold out her hand; you grasp it and she leads you up to the base of the large tree. “I think you’re more than capable of carrying this basket dear. But if you insist,” she takes the basket from your hand and guides you over the roots. With her by your side you had faith that your clumsiness would not win out this time.

That is until your foot caught on a root, sending you into her arms as the picnic basket drops to the ground.

“Please be careful around here. One wrong move and you’ll wind up with a twisted ankle.“ Her face carries some worry as she sets you back on your feet.

“You caught me and dropped the basket?” You ask, a small chuckle escaping your lips. She shakes her head, “I’ll always be the one to save you.”

“My knight in shining armor~”

[cameronspecial]

aquarium date with the angel anthology?i live ur writing it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy like i have a crush

Let Me Touch The Stingray, Angel

Pairing: Frat!Rafe Cameron x Reader

Warnings: N/A

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 0.7K

A/N: Thank you! It means so much to me that you love my writing and I'm so glad that it makes you feel warm and fuzzy because I know how good it feels when a fanfic does that to you!

Masterlist

Date nights happen at least once a month and they take turns on who gets to decide what they do. It’s Y/N’s turn to pick and she wants to go to the aquarium. Rafe would never admit this to her, but he thinks it’s rather childish. He is still going to pay for it and put on a smile though. He’ll buy any food or souvenir she’ll want. He’ll take any picture she wants. He would never do anything to make her feel bad, but he just doesn’t see himself truly enjoying looking at fish for hours. Y/N bounces on the tip of the toes and holds their tickets in her grip. She insisted on printing them out. She always prints date stuff out to keep them in a scrapbook. He takes in her excitement, smiling down at how cute she looks. “Do you think that there will be turtles? I really want to see a turtle. They are so cute,” she excites, looking up at him with big eyes. He kisses her cheek, “There must be a turtle in there somewhere, but if there isn’t, then I’ll buy us a ticket to anywhere they have turtles.” “You don’t have to do that, Rafe,” she says. He shakes his head, “But I want to.”

They get to the front of the line pretty quickly and go through the local aquatic life section pretty fast. Y/N wanted to get to the turtles. They go through the tanks that are a tunnel, standing on the carpets and taking in the scene. She taps on Rafe’s arm excitedly and points at somewhere in the tank, “Rafe, Rafe. Look! It’s a turtle. Take a picture of me with it.” Rafe follows her finger to see the green reptile. He quickly pulls out his phone and takes a video of Y/N as the sea creature passes. 

As they walk through the exhibit, Y/N notices that Rafe isn’t as excited about the animals as she is and she tries everything she can to get him to match her energy. They near the end of the aquarium and Y/N still hasn’t succeeded. The only thing left is the touch tank, which she isn’t sure she wants to go to because of how much bacteria is probably in the water. She is about to lead Rafe through this section when she notices the curiosity in his eyes. He wants to know what the stingrays feel like, but he doesn’t want to ask his girlfriend to stop. This day is about her. Her feet stand still for a second, causing him to bump into her. He looks down at her to see what’s wrong. “You want to touch the stingrays?” she asks. He nods his head like a child, “Please let me touch the stingray, Angel.” Her mouth turns into a grin. “Of course, Rafe.” He lets go of her hand and runs to the back of the line. Y/N slowly follows, snuggling under his arm as they wait in line. 

They get to the front of the line and Y/N can’t keep up with Rafe. He leans over the edge of the tank, reaching down to feel the skin of the animal. The flat creature comes close to Rafe and he finally gets to feel it. It’s a lot spongier than he thought. His hand jerks back in surprise and he lets out a deep chuckle. “You liked how that felt. Didn’t you?” she comments, taking his hand in hers so they can head to the gift shop. He looks at her in adoration, “Yes! It felt so cool. You have to feel it.” He spots the stingray coming back around and dives both their hands toward it. She feels the smooth texture, yipping when the pad of her fingers touches a hard part. She stumbles back into him and he wraps his arm around her. 

They leave the touch tank section, heading to the gift shop. When they leave the store, Rafe is carrying every stingray and turtle item he sees in the store. Let’s just say Ward Cameron will be very surprised once he sees his credit card statement for this month.

Taglist: @winterrrnight @loves0phelia

[northsoulss]

I don’t know if you request are still open but imagine Elisa de Almeida with S/O that’s really pretty but has a resting B face, always look tired or about to say something rude BUT she has the kindest soul, she always has a nice attitude, and is basically unable so say rude things to son because she’ll feel bad. ( my friend is like this she literally is the nicest human I’ve ever met)

softie - elisa de almeida

(a/n : hi anon! thanks for the request! this is actually my first request so i hope i did it justice! xoxo)

all your life, you have been told that you looked like a bitch by those who don’t know you very well. it did affect you when you were younger, not understanding why people thought of you that way even though you never acted like one. eventually, as you grew up, you stopped caring and instead, you started to embrace it.

you stopped trying to smile more, to look more “friendly”. you started to relax your face, and occasionally get thrown judgmental stares by the general public when you are out and about. especially since you play football, word spreads fast that psg is housing a cold-hearted striker.

that’s what you were known as. “cold”. your friends know better though. they know you were fearlessly loyal, and literally the nicest, and sweetest person alive.

you were known to be powerful and ruthless on the pitch, not taking shit from anyone. however, what the media and the fans didn’t see were the fond smiles shown to your teammates after each game, the gentle acts of services that you always provided; helping your teammates get coffee, being the first the volunteer when people needed help with something. too bad the fans didn’t see you that way.

the day rumours did start to spread like wild fire that you were dating the well known charismatic defender marked the start of your reputation crashing down. there were comments from fans like, “oh my god, how do they even work?”, and you gotta admit that sometimes it does hurt.

whenever you post your usual content on instagram and elisa comments on it with her usual “❤️”, your comment section gets real messy.

it’s easy to say that people just didn’t get why or how you two worked. you, the ruthless, cold-hearted woman, dating elisa, who was charming and bubbly, and to say the least, very smiley.

however, a few months ago, sakina posted on her instagram story a video of elisa just talking, but there you were in the background, staring with a love sick smile. needless to say, you thought the unsolicited comments would start to dial down now that your fans have seen the other side of you, but that was not the case.

“hi baby!” your voice sounds out from the hallway, sitting down to untie your shoes when you feel elisa looming over you. you look up at her with an awkward smile, seeing her with an amused smile with hands on her hips.

“hi.?” you are now confused, and elisa only laughs, taking out her phone and typing something before showing it to you. it was an edit of you, which you were shocked that she watched.

“you watch edits of me baby?” you question, brow raised trying to see her reaction, but she only shakes her head, pointing at the caption instead.

“has our fierce striker turned soft.? what?” you read out, face scrunched up into a frown as you start looking through the comment section. aside from the usual thirsty comments, one in particular caught your eye.

“oh i knew she was a big softie.. what the hell do you mean you knew?!” you practically yell at her phone, utterly shocked. you watch the edit again to see what they meant and you saw it. the clip of you staring at elisa, with eyes practically forming hearts with a fond grin.

“so.. not so cold anymore eh?” she takes the phone back and leans down so that her nose touches yours. she stares into your eyes with her piercing gaze, and you immediately shove her away, obviously flustered. you mumble a “no..” under your breath, trying to continue with what you were doing before elisa interrupted you.

“well, softie. i think things are about to get alot more interesting at our next match.” she hoists you up from the hallway bench and kisses you, lips searingly hot. you only kiss back with just as much energy, groaning when she presses you against the wall. at least now people know you aren’t just some bitch.

©️northsoulss 2023, all rights reserved.

[mj-iza-writer]

Two notes before getting onto this story.

1. This is about a bladder prolapse. That can make people uncomfortable. So reader beware.

2. This goes for everyone... practice your kegels. Everyone can have a issus with their pelvic floor, though this is more possible for those with a vaginal presenting body. Kegels.... kegels... kegels, and schedule with you obgyn. I know they're scary, but take care of yourself.

Caretaker jumped out of bed.

It was never a good thing when your wife called for you like this. It was even worse when they were shrieking.

"Honey what's going on?", Caretaker huffed from the outside of the bathroom, "Whumpee?"

"It's falling out", Whumpee yelled.

"Wh-whats falling out?",Caretaker slowly opened the door.

"I-I don't know, something is definitely sticking out that shouldn't be there", Whumpee sobbed.

"Uh, le-let me see", Caretaker frowned.

Whumpee sat on the toilet with one hand holding their private area.

"I don't want you to", Whumpee sobbed harder, "I don't even want to move."

"Honey, we have been married for a long time. This may be something that happens to us elderly fokes", Caretaker knelt down.

"I don't want to move my hands", Whumpee whimpered.

"Okay", Caretaker sighed and brushed Whumpee's tears away, "I'm going to call for an ambulance, and we will go to the hospital. Can I at least move you to the bed?"

Whumpee sniffled as they thought for a moment.

"I don't want to move", Whumpee repeated through tears.

Whumpee blushed at the first responders when they came in.

"I'm sorry, I'm too nervous to move", Whumpee looked down at themself.

"You're alright", one of them smiled comfortingly, "we are going to lift you up and lay you down on the gurney here. Gravity will stop making it feel like it's moving down. We do have to look really quick after you lay down, then we will get you covered up okay."

Whumpee nodded, "where's my husband?"

"I'm right here honey", Caretaker called from the other side of the door, "I'm just staying out of the way."

"One... two... three", Whumpee was lifted up then laid on the gurney.

"Ooh, you both are so strong", Whumpee commented.

"Thankyou", both of the responders smiled.

"Don't be flirting with them dear", Caretaker chuckled.

"We are going to take a look now", the responder went down near the problem, "I'm betting it's your bladder or something from your pelvic floor organs, but let's have a look."

"Honey, I'm going to drive to the hospital in the car. It's pretty late, so we will wait to text the kids until the morning", Caretaker followed the first responders as they carried the gurney down the stairs.

"Okay be careful dear", Whumpee tried to glance up at them.

"I will, you guys take care of her. She's the love of my life", Caretaker chuckled.

"Yes sir", they both responded.

"Yep, that is definitely your bladder", the doctor confirmed after some testing and images were taken.

"My wive's bladder is truly falling out", Caretaker leaned up to hold Whumpee's hand.

"Yes, this can be quite common for anyone really, especially ladies. Have you carried children?", the doctor set a few things aside.

"Yes, a few", Whumpee nodded.

"All vaginally delivered?", the doctor looked under the blanket.

"Two vaginally, our third was special and decided they needed to be c-sectioned out", Caretaker sighed, "are you saying this is because of pregnancy."

"It can happen. If you carry children, your pelvic floor can be affected. If it's a bad pregnancy and you don't get pelvic floor therapy, or even something as simple as practicing kegels, your pelvic floor weakens. As you get older, you run a risk of bladder prolapse."

Whumpee shuddered as the doctor felt around.

"Sir, I'm going to show you how to push this back up. I recommend going to a gynecologist for their opinion. If they deem it necessary you may have a surgery to prepare it", the doctor slowly poked the bladder back up while Caretaker watched, "you may get lucky and just require a pessery to help keep things in place."

"Pessery?", Whumpee shivered at the sensation.

"I'm sorry, I know that feels weird", the doctor covered her with the blanket again, "a pessery is a plastic disk or varying sizes. Your gynecologist will help size you to make sure you get the most comfortable one. It goes up in your vagina, and can be removed. You will probably be required to go back to your doctor every few months for maintenance and cleaning as well."

"That sounds horribly uncomfortable", Whumpee frowned.

"So does having your bladder falling out", the doctor sighed, "I can get you a referral to a gynecologist if you don't have one already. I definitely recommend getting an appointment soon though."

"I'll call tomorrow morning", Caretaker kissed Whumpee's hand, "when the office opens ."

"So you do have a doctor then?", the doctor stood.

"Yes", Caretaker nodded, "funnily enough, she just had her breast and pelvic exam done."

"No papsmear young lady?", the doctor chuckled.

"Not at my age", Whumpee sighed, "I'm too old for one of those now."

"We'll keep her here overnight for monitoring. If you want, a nurse can bring in a blanket and pillow. You can sleep here overnight", the doctor turned to Caretaker.

"I suppose I might. I'm not a fan of driving in the dark with my old eyes. I'd hate to bother one of our kids... it's so late", Caretaker stood and kissed Whumpee's forehead, "we'll figure this out dear."

Whumpee nodded as their eyes glistened with tears.

"No need to cry. I'm right here with you for better or worse... sick or in health... no matter what", Caretaker kissed her head again, "I love you."

"I love you too", Whumpee's lip quivered.

"I'll send a nurse in to get you both settled", the Doctor went to the door, "have a good night."

"You have a good night as well Doctor. I'll try to keep her under control", Caretaker chuckled at his wife.

"Me, dear?", Whumpee giggled.

"I love you", Caretaker leaned into the bed and kissed Whumpee again, "I love you so much. We will get this figured out."

This story was written with my grandparents as inspiration; along with my job as a medical receptionist for an obgyn. Practice you kegels. -MJ

Taglist. As always please let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the list. It's not a problem at all. First list...

@villainsandheroes @the-beasts-have-arrived

@sacredwrath @porschethemermaid

@monarchthefirst @generic-whumperz

@bloodyandfrightened @freefallingup13

@notpeppermint @cyborg0109

@idontreallyexistyet @painfulplots

@whumpbump @everythingsscary

@skittles-the-whumpee @expressionless-fr

@theforeverdyingperson @legendarydelusiongoatee

@candleshopmenace @whumpanthems

@lavndvrr @ivymyers

@starfields08000 @a-living-canvas

@lumpofsand @watermeezer

@indigoviolet311 @whumpy-mountains

@risk606 @electrons2006

@paperprinxe @whumprince

@kaz-of-crows @mis-graves

@decaffeinatedtimetraveler94 @sausages-things

@isikedmyself878 @daffyduckcommittedtaxfraud

@valravnthefrenchie @glennemerald

@jasperthecapser @does-directions

@deafeninglittlecrown @jumpywhumpywriter

@blackbirdsinatrenchcoat @mylifeisonthebookshelf

@thenormalestever @whatwhump

@galatic-worm @starmoon-constellation

[jemgirl86]

As much crap as I’ve talked about that show, I do feel bad for the fans that they killed off the main guy. I’ve had that happen to some of my favorite characters before, but at least it was usually in a soap situation where you knew they might come back. It still sucks though.

Anyway, and not to be the nosiest person alive considering I don’t go there and I actively dislike the show lol, but I’m this close to hoping in a comment section and asking why he was killed off, because, like, aren’t him and Angela the biggest draw? I mean, I know ppl love that ship, but Peter and Angela are the actors *in italics* in the cast lol. I mean, I almost watched it once upon a time simply because they announced that cast and they were gonna be in it (them and Connie, love her too) and I loved him in Six Feet Under and Parenthood, and even in that up its own butt Aaron Sorkin show, Sports Night. He’s a really good actor. Why would they kill off one half of the good acting team lol??? Did he wake up one day and realize he was better than that? Was it a contract dispute? What happened?

(Side note, TikTok clips sometimes get me to watch a show, but this show is like the one time TikTok shoving clips down my throat ensured that I would never watch a show lol. They showed me too many clips of cop Angela, and she played the role almost too well 😬)

[pbandjesse]

I was really tired all day. Like to the point I was spacing out a ton. But it wasn't a bad day. I'm just beat.

I slept alright. I struggled to fall asleep and Sylvia woke up suddenly at 130 and startled me. But after she ate I was able to go back to sleep pretty fast.

When I woke up this morning I was exhausted. James was putting baby down and told me to try and get more rest but I didn't want to throw off the routine I like. I would get up and told Sylvia, who was awake and smiling at me, that I would be back for her soon.

I got cleaned up and dressed. Made the bed. And finally got baby out of her sleep sack.

I got her dressed and told her about our day. That we would go sit in the living room before moving to the studio. And when James got home we would go outside.

James was getting the oil changed in the car. Some filters. General maintenance. And thankfully it didn't take as long as it has in the past.

While we were home alone I would do some sewing. Some tummy time with baby. And just enjoying the morning. Sylvia would take a nap and I tried but I couldn't turn off my brain, even though my body was so tired. Like I was just laying in the studio and feeling absolutely disconnected to my body.

I texted James that I was feeling weird. Confused. And when they came home we talked about it and decided to reach out to the therapist we met at the tummy time. I don't think a therapist is what I need, I think I need someone to help with my medication. I think the Zoloft is working but I also think I'm having some side effects. Brain fog and confusion and memory issues. Everyone wants to blame that on 'mommy brain' but I don't think it's that.

James and me would go for a walk soon. I wanted to try turning Sylvia's bassinet stroller into the seat version. My thinking being that she's much sturdier now and she likes sitting. When she's laying she just falls asleep. And she would still fall asleep on this walk but I felt like she was engaged more. Being able to see her face and she ours, I think helped a lot.

It was a really nice walk honestly. It was the best, most present, I felt all day. I loved seeing baby's face when we went under trees. Her eyes get so big.

When we stopped under a willow tree we stopped and I was surprised there was someone walking behind us. So I got out of there way and he made a comment about how we were uncomfortable with him behind us. But I didn't even know he was there! He was like an old motorcycle man. I wasn't uncomfortable, just surprised I hadn't hear him.

Sylvie started to fall asleep again so we started heading home. I was excited to have a salad when we got back. We got the salad dressing I like again.

And so when we got home I brought baby in and James got her bottle and she had lunch before we did.

I sat outside and tried to embroider but I was having trouble focusing. Just to tired. So I played on my phone and rocked on the porch swing and eventually had my salad.

The crow came back. I gave them a crouton. And soon James was coming to get me to go to Haley's.

It wasn't a bad drive out. The GPS took us through the tunnel though and we got to see that the other direction was completely at a stand still because a tanker truck tipped over. Oil spill. Wild. It would effect us badly on the drive back to the city. But for now it was just nice to go visit a friend.

Hayley and her wife are moving next week. But even with all the boxes it was so lovely to hang out. Her baby, Ari, is a month old and very cute. It was interesting hearing her birth story and comparing notes. She had originally wanted a fully unmedicated natural labor, but with a breech, two week late baby, with a cord tangled around his torso, and 28 hours of labor, the whole thing quickly became an emergency c section. So she wasn't as prepared as I had felt going in. But she made it through and I'm excited to be on this journey with her.

Her sister Jess and her wife Ellie would soon be there too. And it was nice to all hang out and chat. Mostly talking about the babies. Their development and our healing and things we have been doing. It was a nice two hour hang out with promises to come back together soon. We can see their new duplex!

Our next stop was to see Anne. But because of the tunnel all the traffic was backed up everywhere. So it took us more then an hour to get to her. When it should have taken less then a half hour. James had had the forethought to feed Sylvia before we left, and I made sure she had a fresh diaper. And honestly it wasn't terrible. Just quiet time in the car, listening to a podcast. Watching the world go by.

When we got to the house it was good to see Anne. To give her something to smile about, holding and cuddling baby. We talked more real about Tucker. About what happens. A little him being cremated and putting him in dime bags. Creating a poster for his obituary. The party which has now become parties. How Anne keeps finding herself in the fetal position. To having to identify his body for the funeral home. To how much this all just sucks. But we try to be there for eachother. James had brought her a fresh loaf of bread. I made her laugh a few times. And gave her a very good hug, and didn't let her cut it short.

We would go home though, we still needed dinner and it's a baby bath night. So off we went.

When we got home me and Sylvia would go sit in the backyard. Her in her bouncer chair, me on the porch swing. James made me dinner and brought it outside. And eventually Sylvia needed more cuddles because she was getting tired. But we had to wait for the second loaf to come out of the oven before we could give her a bath.

But the bath would go fine. The getting dressed lead to a meltdown. Real tears, not breathing, scream crying. Mostly because the first onside we put on was to tight going over her head. And she just absolutely fell apart. It took multiple minutes of holding and shushing to soothe her to be able to eat.

And when I had to readjust and the bottle fell out of her mouth she was quick to cry again. Just going through it.

But I fed her half the bottle. And James the other half. And now she's snoring in her bassinet next to me. Just a little sweetie.

It's almost 9 now. And I'm so tired. I am going to try hard to not just scroll on phone for hours. I need to get some sleep. Like I feel nauseous I'm so tired.

Thankfully tomorrow is mostly a chill day. I don't have any real plans until 5. So I hope to work on collecting some gardening stuff. And just enjoying being out and being home with my baby.

I hope you all have a nice night. Sleep well. Hug your loved ones. Goodnight!

[moony-2001]

Lore Olympus ch. 257-262 critique pt. 1

This one is gonna be split into 2 parts. I'm trying not to ramble on too much but I figure it'll be better if this bad boy is just split up. After that, I may or may not do more chapter critiques. I don’t want my content to *just* be chapter critiques

Ch. 257

I honestly don't remember having a lot to say about the beginning of this chapter. It was very meh. It basically just reconfirms what we already knew about the state of the mortal realm. I did want to discuss a few "stand-out" scenes when we flip back to the meeting room.

The bitter MIL trope

When we cut to Demeter trying to verbalize what's happening in the mortal realm, something she said really pissed me off:

Let me be clear. I'm not mad about what she said. I mean, I am, but I'm more mad at the fact that Rachel made her say this and the overuse of the whole "Demeter is a petty, bitter in-law that can't handle the fact that her daughter has her own life" trope.

Literally what problems is she creating from this plague?? First of all, this is a problem Persephone started, not Demeter, so Demeter confirming that the mortal realm is dying is not "creating problems". Inadvertently, the other gods back her up on this by expressing concern about the fact that what will happen to other non-immortal beings like the nymphs and what will happen if it spreads to the other realms.

I don't know if this is a callback to the original hymn, and if it is, it's in really fucking poor taste. In the original hymn, Demeter did not cause the winter "out of spite". She did it because she was fucking pissed that not only was her daughter taken away from her, but it was done so behind her back and without her consent. Also, can we stop with the "bitter MIL" trope, especially involving Demeter? I know MILs in real life can be a nightmare. Trust me, I know. But I don't think fiercely loving your daughter and not wanting her to be traded away like she's a set of golf clubs constitutes being a bitter mother-in-law.

Apollo

Yeaaaah Apollo is right, I'll give him that. Persephone is, once again, a big part of the problem. I know the gods aren't perfect. No one is perfect. But for some reason, a lot of the plot of this story seems to center around Persephone making these big-ass messes, blaming everyone but herself, and then doing fuck-all to actually fix the situation. Also, I find it hilarious that Hades is so offended by the notion that Apollo would accuse him of trying to expand his kingdom when his entire realm was built by slave labor. When has a slave master ever complained about having more slaves prisoners with jobs? Don't answer, that question is purely rhetorical.

Eris, my beloved

Ugh, the part with Eris is just *chef's kiss*. Especially when she transforms into Artemis??? I just??

I want to redraw the scene when I have time because I feel like it could be a lot more spooky-looking than it is now.

Hera

The rest of the chapter is kinda meh. Hated Hera and Apollo's interaction. Also, I'm pretty sure Rachel spelled "wife" wrong. A "waif" is a homeless person, particularly a child. Much hate to Apollo for what he said to Hera, even though Hera also low-key sucks. And yeaaaah. That's it.

Ch. 258

The handling of Hera and Kronos

Chapter 258 picks up pretty much where we left off with Hera. I gotta say I actually really liked this chapter. I know my whole page now is pretty much constantly shitting on the entirety of LO, but I gotta give major props to Rachel for how she handled 258. Was the chapter leading up to and including the interaction between Hera and Kronos perfect? No. But IMO it was still really good.

The reason why I say this is because not long before this chapter was posted, I and a lot of other anti-LO creators noticed there was a spike in comments both under Rachel's insta and in the comic's comment section romanticizing the relationship between Hera and Kronos. It was disgusting. Never should someone ever romanticize the relationship between a victim/survivor and their abuser. In this chapter, Rachel seemingly put her foot down about this and basically said "This is not okay". Now, she never outright said that anywhere that I saw, but that's the vibes I was picking up. Standing up to your abuser is really hard to do. And I'm proud of Hera (even though she's not real lol).

The one thing I did not like about this portion of the chapter was Hera and Hestia's interaction.

Really? That's all you have to say to your sister that has been going through a hell of a time? Yeah, okay, Hestia.

The ritual

Now that I've fulfilled my once-a-month praise quota for LO, time to get back to the shitting.

Besides the ugly ass art, I introduce a new challenge. The Persephone tries not to make everything about herself challenge: impossible. I see she's picking up a few tricks from Hades in the narcissist department. I've noticed, especially recently, that H&P has a particularly nasty habit of diminishing others' feelings or certain situations to make it all about themselves. I know I mentioned this in my last critique but I feel the need to bring it up again, especially in these last bits of this chapter.

Case in point A is that Hades and Persephone get so wrapped up in each other that they don't even notice that Hecate is, for lack of better terms, wigging out.

Obviously, she turns out fine, but seriously? You didn't even pay attention to her until Morpheus pointed out the fact that something was clearly wrong.

*unholy screaming* pt. 1

So you guys know how I felt about the whole nightie situation with Persephone. Well, you're in luck because the rage I feel for the last part of this chapter makes that pale in comparison.

This is case in point B of Hades and Persephone making everything about themselves.

When I first saw this I was kinda like "Huh???" And then the chapter ended??? I had to wait a whole ass week to find out but my fuckery senses were tingling.

Ch. 259

*unholy screaming* pt. 2

Boy oh boy were my fuckery senses right.

Literally, who fucking cares? This isn't about you!! You aren't the victims in this. They both started all this and they need to be willing to do whatever it takes to fix it. Persephone, to her credit, at least acknowledges that in a much nicer way. But yet again, HADES MAKES IT ABOUT HIMSELF.

"...it will come at a cost to us... we have to basically choose between us and everyone else." Uh. YEAH??? Jfc, stop being a whiney piss baby, and get your shit together! Choosing between yourselves and everyone else? Is that even a question? If you both have to sacrifice yourselves to make this better, tough titties.

The pool scene

This scene is what I was talking about when I mentioned Persephone's speech. But I still can't enjoy it. Why, I hear you ask? I don't know, MAYBE BECAUSE THEY'RE HAVING SEX WHILE THE WORLD IS BURNING DOWN AROUND THEM. Yeah, sure they deserve to have their lovey-dovey moments (I guess. Undeservedly so IMO). But how about you wait to pork until you've saved the world from perilous doom???

Also maybe I'm reading into this waaaaay too much, but tell me why I feel like Persephone just had sex with Hades to talk him off a wall. To me, it almost felt equivalent to "I'm going to kms if you leave me" or some other kind of weird hostage situation where now Persephone has to make HIM feel better even though this is about HER and how SHE fucked up. Idk.

Final notes

Well, that wraps up part 1. I know I've been gone for way longer than I said I was going to be and for that I'm sorry. Overall, pretty yikes but I liked 258 the best.

[jazzmckay]

davg day 2:

im queer and suffering. i just barely held myself off from flirting with lace because im saving myself for neve okay but then bellara upgraded from "cool and cute" to "yeah i need to romance her" and then i recruited lucanis. need i even say more. hes the kind of Complicated i always go nuts for. i think i can restrain myself with him though because it would be fun to romance him with a mage perhaps. another time. its fine. i can do this. (let me be poly bioware)

backing up a bit now that i have that out of my system :p

dragon!ghilly lets gooooo. that section was fucked up (affectionate). i was also a bit fucked up. left the mayor to his fate and basically instantly felt bad for it lmfao but i do think that's what my rook would do and that guy just got under my skin i guess! as bellara said, it was hard to feel sympathy after everything we saw in the village. wonder if this decision will come back to haunt me later, we'll see

morrigan is heading deeper into true MILF territory and i'm here for it. she looks really good. it feels like she's growing well into herself in general, and mellowing out. (possibly she was already like this in dai but i never saw because i was only ever able to play the default world state where she didnt have kieran. speaking of which, i really thought id have to pick more choices at the beginning. does davg morrigan have kieran? did she take the well of sorrows? my lavellan took it but that wasnt something i could input so!! im curious if thatll come up). i loved the comment she made about pissing solas off with trying to explain elven history to him hehe

so i DID expect lace to get magic but i did NOT expect it to happen in such a spectacular valta-esque fashion, damn. that was a "holy shiiittt" moment for me. varrics cryptic statement about it being bad is concerning but im gonna keep living in blissful ignorance right now and enjoy how excited lace is to feel connected and explore her new abilities

before that bit, there was that super sweet moment between rook, lace, and neve that really stood out to me ;w; i chose the dialogue option "we shouldnt be at each others throats" which lead to lace reassuring neve she wasn't blaming her for how things happened, and neve responded with pointing out lace shouldnt be blaming herself either, then i picked "we have to support each other" which was so lovely.... what a heartfelt conversation, a feel-good moment that bolsters the team dynamic. i looove it. i'll always take more companion/companion connection like that <3

i feel like i'm slower to pick up new game mechanics than i used to be as i get older because i'm definitely still getting used to both the combat and all the gear and such, but i think i like how it's set up in this game. i haven't levelled up a merchant yet but the whole reputation thing is neat and adds more weight to a trading system that is often forgettable / not really integrated into the story in most games. working towards upgrading both the shops and the items is interesting. it also takes the stress of inv management off my shoulders lol amazing, getting to loot without the hassle of sorting through it all and constantly running out of space? im here for it

solarric solarricing again

im unwell

then i headed off to antiva and took a screenshot of every cat i saw and/or pet. it's cool to learn more about the crows. naturally, i was excited to be in a city again and it did not disappoint. theyre sooo well crafted, absolutely beautiful and designed to make them feel genuinely alive.

the prison was also gorgeous. the environments in this game kick ass. ive stopped so many times just to take in the view. stunning. that giant skeleton on the sea floor caught my eye too.

the fact that "oof" is a dialogue option is SO FUNNY....

the scene of bellara trying to fix the archive spirit crystal and reading her packing note is what sealed the deal for me. i picked the purple option after watching her hit the thing in frustration, the "can i try too?" one and it was so cute. failed to resist flirting and that was also cute af

that said, im already thinking about bellara/merrill bc how can i not... idk if merrill will come up later in some other fashion so this might not make sense, but i can imagine merrill relating to the veil jumpers and being in contact, able to help them with artifacts. if bellara knows about merrill and what she accomplished before the breach and magic getting wonky, she probably looks up to her a bit. and i think bellara would remind merrill of herself as she was before everything terrible happened for her 😭it would be nice for her to have someone who can both meet her on the same level re: technical/magical knowledge and in such a chipper, enthusiastic way

i think i'm still gonna romance neve though, i just feel like she and my current rook Work. i loved the detail that they never met before despite both being associated with the shadow dragons and neve saying because she's more of an informant, rook mightve acted on her info before. i also chose her to help me during solas' ritual so she got hurt, which added more emotional connection ;w;

back to minrathous soon which im excited about. but im gonna do lace's side mission about her magic first :>

[givemeanaccountalready]

Points of Origin & Paths to Take (Part 1)

1

Milgram sure does love its pairs, and boy do I have some thoughts on the matter. Namely, what I think connects each pair of prisoners and predictions for their third trial videos (and Kotoko’s second trial song since Mikoto’s second video just dropped).

I am not the first person to say this and I won’t be the last, but I think I figured out how the prisoners are paired: it’s under the broadest definition of their underlying motives. And unsurprisingly, their motives seem to guide the path they take at Milgram. I was worried that Mikoto’s “Double” would throw me for a loop, but it’s confirming my feelings instead.

All of the motives seem to be driven by the absence of something in the prisoners’ lives that led up to them committing their respective murders. This is how I think the motives are paired:

Haruka and Yuno: the absence of love

Fuuta and Muu: the absence of connection

Shidou and Mahiru: the absence of knowledge

Kazui and Amane: the absence of authenticity

Mikoto and Kotoko: the absence of accountability

These definitions are a bit broad but I will explain in each section. For each pair, the motives start out along a central idea, and then branch out in different directions that foil each other in some way.

Haruka & Yuno: the Absence of Love

"If you forgive this sin, you're as good as an accomplice / I'm alone and lonely, please give me love"

"I feel emptiness inside me, we agreed to seek each other out / I wish I could do something about it, FUTURE!"

-"Undercover"

(I feel like I said a lot about Haruka already when I did my 'Haruka is Peter Pan but not the Disney one' comparison a while back.)

Haruka is the easier of the two to pin down for this motive. The line played over Haruka's introduction in "Undercover" says it outright. It is also clear during the first trial that he wants to someone to love and take care of him even though he sees himself as bad or useless. Haruka craves affection, and in turn, validation. Despite Es striking him, Haruka can’t stop smiling because Es has focused their attention on him and swore that they wouldn’t be scared off by what Haruka did. That they are going to focus on him until the very end. I think this is probably when Haruka decided that Es would serve as his new mother figure. Es has promised not to leave him; unlike his mother, who did leave him behind when Haruka became undesirable.

During the second interrogation, Haruka admits that he killed his victim to get his mother’s attention back to him, thinking that she’d love him again like she used to. Before this, Es had pointed out that there still are two trials left to go and asked why Haruka is acting like he has been fully absolved. Haruka is rather volatile during this part of the interrogation, and accuses Es of bullying him. He then goes on to revoke Es’s status as his mother and gives the title to Muu. Es, like most people in their shoes would be, is confused and asks what the fuck is Haruka going on about. Unbeknownst to Es, his promise to Haruka and his forgiveness from the first trial solidified them as Haruka’s new mother figure, and Haruka is now taking condemnation for what he did as Es behaving as his mother did. He is not doing this betrayal shit a second time. Muu and him became close during the inter-trial period, and since she still likes him even though he still perceives himself as a useless, good-for-nothing, she now gets the mother title. Now, I don't like Muu but for her sake, I really hope this doesn’t come back to bite her in the ass. Prisoners cannot fight while Es is awake, but Muu loses that protection once the second trial is finished and Es falls asleep again. I doubt she'd cut ties with him if he doesn't succeed in killing himself to avenge her Guilty verdict, but I could see her accidentally making a throwaway comment that could trigger his volatile side.

Yuno is a tad harder to pin down because heaven forbid our girlboss say it outright like Haruka, but I do think the absence of love in her life led to her choices both before and during Milgram. I don’t think she was abused or intentionally neglected like Haruka was (he is at least the latter), but I do think she was trying to find herself by becoming a sex worker. Let me explain, I don’t think Yuno loathes herself and did sex work to fill a void of some sort. I think she wanted to explore different facets of herself, enjoys sex and dating, and decided to make a little money off her unorthodox journey of self discovery. Yuno does not care what other people think, and she seems to be trying to find the version of herself that she likes best.

“Teardrop” emphasizes her not caring about external validation. Yuno does not shy away from what she did before coming away to Milgram and is angry when the audience tries to take her autonomy from her by saying she had no choice or was manipulated into it. Her actions were her choices that she made because she wanted to. She chose to put on a mask and be the girl each of her clients wanted, and she’ll spit in the faces of those who say her sense of self was so weak she was easily manipulated into. She's stated in both of her interrogations that she does not care if she is condemned for what she did, but she does care about losing her agency.

Yuno is perceptive and socially intelligent. While she may find wearing a mask for too long to be bothersome (like when she talks to Mikoto about letting his guard down and being less self-conscious or breaks the happy-go-lucky act in her first interrogation), she understands the reasoning behind them (she know why Kazui lies so much and that there are people like Kotoko who take their first impression of someone as infallibly right which could spell harm for her). She knows sex work, adultery, and the like are looked down on and that society tends to come down harder on those scandalous things compared to other acts, so her sex work is hidden. (I’m not sure if Yuuko Kashigawa is the alias she gave to just the doctor who performed her abortion or the name she used for when she was with clients).

So, what does this mean for Trial 3? We know that the prisoners’ next song depends on the previous trial’s verdict. Haruka went from Innocent to Guilty while Yuno received her second Innocent verdict. Neither are going to be pleased. Haruka will be angry because he’ll see it as another betrayal by Es, while Yuno, might still see the Innocent verdict as Es continuing to not take her seriously/not respecting that she is a person capable of making her own decisions.

If you compare their Trial 1 songs to their Trial 2 songs, both Haruka and Yuno become more explicit about what they’ve done. And the explicitness seems to be in response to how they interpreted their Innocent verdicts.

In “Weakness” we get to see teenage Haruka kill something offscreen with a rock. Young Haruka is horrified by the blood on his hands, but the blood is censored by crayon scribbles. The most violent thing we see is Haruka strangle his younger self, but we don’t see him finish the act. No bodies, human or animal, are in his first music video. He seems ashamed of what he’s done. The Innocent verdict seems to validate him (which he seems to take as love), and so jn “All-Knowing All Agony” he doesn’t hide what he’s done. We see him launch a chair through the fish tank and watch them flop on the ground. We see animals that he has presumably killed, ranging from butterflies to dogs. We see him stand up and beam while the things he’s killed litter the ground, and for a split second at the end, we see him strangle somebody. Our “love” gave him a kind of strength he didn’t have before and now he’s excitedly showing off what he’s done. He’s like a little kid showing off his new skill for the adults. I think in Trial 3, Haruka is going to take his Guilty verdict personally and I think he’s going to try and win back our “love” (pity) by showing how he got so screwed up he ended up killing someone. He equates pity with love and validation with acceptance and encouragement, so I don't think he'll close himself off from Es, and by extension, us, entirely. He killed to win back his mother’s love, you think he won’t show worse to win back ours?

As for Yuno, “Teardrop” is her middle finger to the “poor girl” assumptions people made. It’s as if she’s saying, “Oh, you love the ideal me so much, right? How about now? Do you still love me, or just your overrated, ideal me?” We see her accept money in return for her services and dressed in lingerie, we see her in several scenarios where it is implied that she either had or is about to have sex with a client, we see her show off those different facets of herself and stand proudly beside them. Unfortunately, at least with the Western audience, she’s been met with a resounding “Girlboss, slay queen” rather than the condemnation she wanted/expected for showing off her true self. She’s going to be even more pissed with us and she is more likely going to be even more direct so the other shoe can finally drop (get the rejection she expects to receive).

These are just my thoughts on these two and what I think is going to happen next. That’s a lot of spinning my wheels for just these two, so I’m going to be breaking this thing up into segments. Next up is Fuuta and Muu.

2 / 3 / 4 / 5

[unohanabbygirl]

Hi! As someone who has written a million words of Lucemond I was hoping you could share your opinions on the ship itself? I recently got into the pairing but I’ve noticed that a large majority of creators feminize or hyper-feminize Luke. Between him and Aemond, Luke is the one who writers will only assign the role of omega in abo fics or give him the ability of mpreg which isn’t seen in other characters. I’m just curious as to why fic writers or artists have gone down this road of characterization for Luke (and vice versa not applied the same to Aemond). I have no idea if this has been debated or not within the fandom either but it seems like you’ve been pretty active in writing since the ship was first established. I read the book so I do know there’s a LARGE difference between book Luke and show Luke. The tv producers wanted more sympathy for Luke’s death so they really upped the insecurity and softness of his character but people have taken that to sort of pigeonhole him into a more feminized character in fics/art. Why does softness and insecurity translate into him being the one to carry a child or undergo traumatic events under Aemond’s thumb? This is def not me critiquing creators or saying it’s bad to feminize characters! I’m just curious as to why the pairing has evolved in this way because in the book Luke is not insecure at all and definitely more confident. Why do you think solely feminizing Luke is SO prolific in created content for the ship?

Hmm, as someone who has read F&B and watched the show I can only answer for myself since other than this little corner I’ve created, I choose not to interact outside of it often since fandom drama and heated debates have never been my thing.

I think one of many reasons so many people here have really gravitated towards assigning Luke the more soft, feminine and nurturing role between them is mostly because of the show. A lot of people i’ve interacted with here on tumblr and in Ao3 comment sections either haven’t read F&B at all or just prefer the show writers drastic changes. It’s the reason why ships like Rhaenyra/Alicent became so popular since HOTD came out. Alicent is often characterized as a doe-eyed girl failure by Rhaenicent shippers instead of her plotting, evil stepmother book counterpart because thats the version of her we got to see on our tv screens, therefore it’s the version many of us like to lean towards when making fanart or writing fic and the same goes for Luke. Though book Lucerys is by no means a shy anxiety filled boy who feels such immense guilt for mutilating Aemond, that’s what we were able to see playout through the show. It’s the characterization most saw and instantly loved.

On top of that, Aemond is Luke’s murderer who taunted and tormented him each chance he was given until the very end. So I feel that in a fandom where dead dove is as popular as it is, it makes sense for Luke to be the one undergoing such heavy trauma while Aemond is the one who inflicts it. I don’t think most of my fellow Lucemond writers put Luke through truama in fics BECAUSE he’s the more soft/feminine one, but because it aligns with canon. Luke was the prey and Aemond was the predator. Lucy being the chosen omega is just an added coincidence from how I see it.

And while I don’t like to speak for others I feel that when it comes to fic people (including myself) usually have a habit in making the smaller and or more sweet partner the omega simply cause a/b/o is an established troupe with each secondary gender having set characteristics. And while I don’t think that omega automatically equates to weak or helpless (most omega Luke fics I’ve read showcase him being strong willed and a little manipulative if it means luring Aemond over to the blacks side) that’s simply what people do when it comes to omegaverse.

As for non a/b/o fics that only assign Luke the ability to have children, I can’t answer why those authors chose that route because I haven’t made anything of the sort myself. While I have written a fic where Luke is a mother it’s a/b/o while the other establishes all targs as being able to give birth/ “sire” so it’s not just Luke. My only answer would be they just want Lucemond babies and decided Luke should be the one to carry.

But those are just my thoughts.

[alfgifu]

Fic analysis 46. All fear gives way

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53477371/chapters/135356983

Word count: 44,433

Chapters: 14

First posted: 2nd February 2024

Last chapter up: 15th February 2024

Summary: 

The note had been short, blunt, and accompanied by a lock of Dora’s dark hair. It demanded Cliopher’s presence, alone, under a certain tree in the Palace gardens, before the first hour of the morning. He was to bring his seals of office.

There had been some argument, of course. Cliopher had overruled it.

In which Cliopher is surprised to find that his Radiancy has less respect for the protocols than for his Lord Chancellor's safety - or his own - and must travel through his lord's memories to rescue him from the ensuing curse.

How and why this came about

All fear gives way started because a friend was going through a tough time and I offered to write her something fluffy.

Fluffy has always been difficult for me. Funny I can manage, yes, but fluffy? I can do fluffy bits as part of longer stories (there’s lots of fluff in the later half of Tenebra) or as the comfort end of a hurt/comfort arc, but it just doesn’t come naturally to write fluff without, well, drama or politics or Bad Things happening too.

I thought it would be nice and fluffy to write a story that included Dora, where moving to intercept Dora was the reason Kip brushed up against his Radiancy and initiated a ‘Touch scenario’ (mind-melding accompanied with gold smudgies). The initial working title of this fic was aDORAble.

It was not, and is not, fluffy.

My friend noted that it sometimes does help to have an incident or moment of drama to get the plot going. I thought - ah, well, if Dora is kidnapped, and Kip goes after her, and HR rescues them both…

The part with the curse that locks Kip and his Radiancy together into a journey through his Radiancy’s memories was unanticipated.

What worked and what didn’t

I entirely failed to write fluff that stood by itself but did, I think, achieve fluff by the end of the hurt/comfort arc.

Having got Kip and his Radiancy locked together in an inner world I really had no plan on how to resolve it. SuninGlory kindly noodled with me at some length. The solution had to come out of the characters themselves and the things they would naturally do - or would find difficult, but manage eventually.

This also became an opportunity to work up an idea that I’d had sitting around in an open gdoc for ages - the embodiment of many of his Radiancy’s separate identities, from different parts of his life, and how Kip would react. It was satisfying finally having a place to bring that together.

Overall I think it worked well and hung together and felt intentional after the fact. It ended up being a heavier-weight fic, and longer, than planned. But in a good way.

Writing summaries by excerpting sections of text didn’t quite work here, as the summary suggested it was purely a kidnapping story and the soul journey element was hidden. When a commenter pointed this out I updated the text to give more of an indication of what’s going on. I still don’t feel like I’ve cracked summaries, really, most of the ones I’ve written recently make me wince. Something to work on.

What I learned from writing it

However fluffy the premise sounds distrust it? Or possibly, don’t try to add the scare at the start. I came away from writing this fic feeling as though fluff and I needed a rematch.

This might have been the first time I really noticed how much it was possible to bring together mid-flight in a story. Letting things evolve to a certain point and then asking, ‘right, how do I get this to a good ending?’ actually led to an amazingly coherent plot, which was possible because I was writing as best as I could into the characters, and then found the resolution in my read of them too. So little things I’d added earlier worked as set-up even if I hadn’t planned it that way.

I started this fic as a livefic on the HOTE Support Group discord server and was part way through when I quit the server. I kept going as livefic directly to SuninGlory, mostly, who was very patient with me dropping big chunks of story on her.

By this stage my style of liveficcing had fully morphed from dropping a paragraph or thought per comment into just writing the fic up in the comment boxes - somehow that felt (and still feels) somewhat easier than writing in a gdoc or scrivener or whatever. I think the small size of the box and the feeling of an audience helps relieve some of the pressure of a blank page and also to make it feel like I can stop frequently - there are lots of break points between individual comments - which makes it possible to write on my phone in small snatches of time.

[raxistaicho]

The Savior Prince! Edelgard in Thracia, chapter three

This one's mostly an elongated battle. I find battles that are on the one-to-one scale extremely tedious to write and read - I prefer looking broadly at the movement of soldiers and strategies, not on the main characters doing cool shit.

Unfortunately, Reyna is firmly in the second camp. Therefor, I'll summarizing more often. That's not to say there won't be anything to talk about, though, especially once Leif himself arrives.

Spoiler: Reyna's pretty spotty about the kind of person he's supposed to be this early on. Leif, when written in-character doesn't exactly fit her preference for power fantasy protags.

Before we start,

DO NOT FUCKING GO PESTER REYNA IN HER COMMENTS SECTION. I DON'T WANNA SEE PEOPLE COPY-PASTING MY ARGUMENTS HERE IN COMMENTS TO HER EVER AGAIN.

So evidently I've been bullying some widdle iddy-biddy fanfic and that's bad.

Two things:

One, being small or irrelevant doesn't mean you're protected from criticism.

B, The Flame Empress and the Liberation of Thracia might be a small fic, but ReynaAtTheEnd is not a small writer. The Savior King, The Master Tactician and the Queen of Liberation is the number 2 fic on under Three Houses on AO3 for Hits, 7th in kudos, 3rd in comments, and 7th in bookmarks. This is out of around 47,000 fanfics. It has a large tv tropes page, too. Reyna's a 1-percenter as far as Three Houses fanfic writers go and to call her small or random is grossly disingenuous.

The Flame Empress and the Liberation isn't small because Reyna is some fresh plucky-eyed writer, still unknown to the world: it's small because this ain't 2019 anymore, it's still very new, and it's a spin-off crossover involving the blackest black sheep of the Fire Emblem franchise aside from the original Gaiden. And even then, Flame Empress, when compared to its July 2023 contemporary fics, has many times as much recognition as them.

So getting that idiocy out of the way.

Anyways, Lifis's pirates are attacking and Edelgard and Ronan are trying to sound the horn. Funfact, Lifis is a recruitable character, and a rather important one as far as gameplay is concerned, no less. And no, he's not particularly sympathetic and he doesn't really have a sob-story, he's just pragmatic in his douchebaggery and Leif understands he could really use a thief. I wonder what Reyna will do with him.

Edelgard had encountered a few of his grunts some time ago; they'd come into the tree grove where she and a few other girls had been picking apples and made a series of lecherous threats in exchange for leaving without 'causing a ruckus'. Beating the three unconscious with a stepstool had been the only moment to burst through the dull apathy that choked her like a heavy cloak ever since she woke here.

At least Reyna acknowledges Edelgard is a badass, even without her Crest of Flames. We'll see how long that lasts, given Reyna also once had Yuri (yes, that Yuri) subject her to the Standard Female Grab Area. Edelgard notes this raid is unusually big and decides she needs to take Lifis out to end this for good.

Once everyone started pouring into the streets, babbling in confusion and fear

It'd probably be "roads" rather than "streets" even in a good-sized village, which Iz isn't one of. Edelgard tries to reach for Aymr but of course she doesn't have it. Instead she goes for a woodcutter's axe, noting its poor quality and the direness of the situation.

Edelgard turned on her heel and ran toward the tallish spire of Iz's church. Her lack of any kind of armour is a phantom feeling across her entire body; she pushes down her unease harshly, without it I'll be lighter on my feet and get more attacks in. Besides, these are bandits, cowards preying on people who can't fight back. If I needed the armour of an Emperor to beat them, I would be ashamed of myself!

Edelgard is actually quite agile, as you can see even in her Emperor animations. She twirls axes like they're batons. Now obviously it's totally normal to be uneasy about being underequipped, but she can manage just fine. I'm only bringing this up because there's this notion among her detractors that Edelgard wouldn't be anything special without her Crests, Aymr, or special armor, which is just nonsense.

Ronan's mom is upset that Ronan is leaving to fight (this is mostly a modified version of his recruitment quote - he's recruited in the game chapter this fic chapter is portraying). Then we get,

The lack of hope in her voice... it matched the faces of everyone she'd woken up with her warning yells, and it disturbed her how uniform it was. The defeatism. No one had any faith that the world would change or that they could push back the darkness facing them. They only prepared for impact in the hope that being yielding will please their attackers and prevent them from destroying everything, only most things.

Eeeyyy, all right, we've got some of that Edelgard, pursuer of the future and defender of the people going, 'bout time! :D

“Contessa,” she said calmly. “I was an axe knight once.

Just bringing this up to express how weird it is to say it like this. Class names in Fire Emblem only exist for gameplay purposes, the only class that comes close to just being an actual thing in and of itself is the pegasus knight, which is extremely distinct and very specific to Fire Emblem as a series. It'd be much more natural for Edelgard to just assure Contessa she knows how to fight. Reyna does this kinda thing a lot, sadly.

Anyways, Edelgard assures Contessa she'll keep an eye on Ronan, then she urges Ronan to get to high ground and provide covering fire. Oh, Edelgard, if only you knew that mobility is like Ronan's only redeeming quality as a unit. Shitposting aside, good enough tactics for the situation.

Checking the pirates as they charge up, Edelgard notes most have axes but some have bows. It's the latter that concerns her, but we won't actually see Edelgard fight any hunters (bow-wielding rogue-styled units from the Archanea and Jugdral games), so... bwuh? She then boosts and/or tosses Ronan onto a nearby roof, so good to see she's still superhumanly strong.

Edelgard is concerned about lacking the Crest of Flames:

Ah, we don't have a healer. The priest is inside the church, needs to be there to keep a panic from sparking. And I don't have the Crest of Flames anymore...

Just bringing that up to demonstrate how Reyna puts a significant emphasis on the respective powers of the Crests. The self-healing was nice but just nice.

“Okay!” Ronan nodded sharply. “Be careful!” That you care enough to say so...

Reyna, Edelgard knows what kindness is. Or are you acknowledging she was in a terrible place after Byleth got all of her friends to ditch her?

Edelgard gave him a salute in lieu of promising him anything. Then she runs toward the wave of pirates. Already Ronan was taking shots, arrows whisking through the air above her head and raining down around the pirates. His aim is hit and miss, mostly striking shoulders or legs when the arrows didn't wiff.

An arrow shot to the leg or shoulder would be debilitating in this setting. Now obviously in the games proper, Annoying Arrows is in effect most of the time, but Reyna kinda-sorta tries to go for a more gritty, realities of war situation when it suits her and when Claude isn't abusing Talking is a Free Action, so I'm going to hold her to that standard.

It reminded her of Bernadetta, when they'd gone on their first church-sanctioned 'mission'

Reyna don't diss Bernie :/ She's way way better than Ronan. Girl matches Dimitri's damage.

[A random pirate] recognizes her too. “You...! Bitch!” The man snarled, immediately breaking away to attack her. “Is that the best you can come up with?” Edelgard inquired sarcastically.

Edelgard doesn't really trash-talk during a fight. She waits until her enemies are dead, usually.

And yes, that short paragraph did indeed use both past and present-tense. Reyna's inconsistent tense is one of the most distracting things about her writing.

He swung wildly at her; she dodges between both his strikes and swings her axe up at his face. She slashes one of his eyes – good, she thinks as he screams in agony

Okay that man is either dead or rolling on the ground in utter agony. And if he survives the battle he's almost certainly going to die to infection. That is the kind of actual grittiness Reyna misses.

this axe can at least cut the skin – and delivers a Crest-empowered kick to his stomach, sending him staggering backwards. Then she changed her hold and slammed the hilt of the axe into the man's bloody face, causing him to crumple like tin to the ground.

This is a lot of injuries to deal to a single person.

She doesn't get a second to appreciate the ease of that; both of his friends had zeroed in on her too. Ronan caught one of the men in the neck with a well-placed arrow, but the second one falls on her in a seething rage. “I'm going to tear you apart after I'm done with you!” The man raged, grabbing her by the hair.

Why isn't she attacking him? Reyna didn't indicate he just moved too fast for her or that she was busy. What, was she waiting for her ATB gauge to kill?

Edelgard swore at the sudden pain, stumbling over her feet.

Edelgard's endured far worse than having her hair pulled...

She forced herself to relax so he could pull her closer, then delivered a vicious kick to the inside of his shin and slamming the hilt of the woodcutter's axe between his legs.

Damn, Edie XO

The strangled noise he uttered before releasing her hair was very satisfying. “Hah,” Edelgard uttered scornfully as she whipped around and swung her axe at his neck.

First, this is some Marvel shit with the trash talking. Second, wasn't she on the ground? How's she reaching his neck, Edelgard is short.

It promptly got stuck an inch or so in his flesh, forcing her to waste precious seconds wrenching it free to some truly disgusting gurgling sounds.

There, see? Reyna can be gruesome when it's convenient.

The next pirate was after her right away, and the man she'd hit wasn't quite dead yet

What. The dude got hit in the groin from Edelgard's super strength and then almost got decapitated. Even if he's still clinging to life he shouldn't be in any condition to move, let alone fight. Edelgard takes a light injury to the arm, for which she notes:

Arm wound... ugh, largely superficial, but that bleeding will get to me if I let it go on for too long. No time to tear up something for a tourniquet, though. Maybe one of these pirates has a vulnerary on them that I can grab...?

She should be worried about infection.

Her arm throbbed in protest of being ignored as Edelgard slammed her axe into the pirate's chest. She has to do it three times before she hears his death gurgle.

Steal one of their weapons, Edelgard, the one you've got is clearly blunt.

She heard the next attacker running straight at her, and cursed quietly. She grabbed the fallen man's axe off the ground and threw it at her newest attacker; it doesn't land blade in

Now I'm picturing it clonking him on the head with a big "bonk" sound, dammit. Weird time for hand axes in Fire Emblem to have that issue.

They fight for a bit, village man dies, Edelgard uses the Crest of Seiros to decapitate the man who killed him in a single blow - I'm half-surprised he doesn't keep fighting for a bit given the track record - but the force also breaks her own axe. Steal one of the pirates' axes, Edelgard! Thracia is all about nicking enemy weapons!

Instead, Edelgard fights hand-to-hand, until,

...And that's when she saw the paladin. His blue hair made him stand out, even in the middle of a fight; he'd be easily noticeable even without the horse he was astride upon. The man easily closed the distance between himself and her, his lance impaling one of her approaching enemies from behind. It was a brave lance, Edelgard realized with a start; aged slightly, but very well maintained, and an unarmoured ruffian had no chance against it.

Finn has arrived!

He's Leif's sworn knight who's served and protected him since he was an infant. He's also the only unit in Genealogy of the Holy War to appear in both generations of the story (as playable. Shannan, Oifey, and Lewyn appear, but are not playable in both generations), so that coupled with his near-permanent availability in Thracia means Finn's got something of a storied history in the Jugdral games!

Also, he's a Lance Knight, not a Paladin. I'd chalk this up to Edelgard applying her Fodlan-centered lack of knowledge of how things work in Thracia, but I'm pretty confident Reyna's going to get this wrong often.

See, Thracia loosened it a bit, but in Jugdral, the Cavalier and Paladin lines are largely unique to the noble houses of Nordion and Chalphy. They aren't treated as catch-all promoted mounted knights like they are in other games, they're specifically prestigious holy knights.

Finn is a Lance Knight and promotes to a Duke Knight, both of which only use lances, though in Thracia he can use swords (and ONLY swords!) when he dismounts (this is true of all mounted classes aside from bow-wielding mounted ones, which retain bows when dismounted).

Yeah, Kaga was big on lances being mounted-only unless you were a soldier or an armor.

There was someone sitting behind him on his horse, too; as the knight trotted in an arc around her, he hopped off and drew a long, golden blade that glittered with light. It – had slightly similar characteristics to the Levin sword, but it was a completely different shape and the magic didn't smell of the ozone before a storm.

“Are you alright?” The man – no, the boy asked her. He was tallish for his age, spiky brown hair messy and falling around his face framing his dark blue eyes, but looking at his face immediately reminded Edelgard of Lysithea; a matured child who knew from experience that the world is not fair or just by nature.

And this is Leif. Emblem Leif, to be clear.

Now obviously Leif is going to be more hardened than other children, but he's specifically still quite naive at this point in his journey, and he's going to stay that way for a long time to come - if he's written properly, that is.

It's a major point that Leif - despite living in exile - has had a relatively easy life due to his heritage and having nobles and his retainer to look out for him, and thus he doesn't understand the hardships of the truly downtrodden in the Thracian peninsula.

Leif introduces himself and his allies, Fianna Freeblades, and says they've come to save the day.

He raised his sword above his head, and a beam of holy magic bursts from the tip and flies like an arrow to pierce the shoulder of the nearest pirate that the paladin hadn't dealt with.

(snort), don't be fooled: Leif isn't nearly this badass at this point in the game, nor should he in the story. Edelgard says she needs an axe.

Leif nodded in understanding and yelled, “Halvin!” One of the axe men broke away from the fight and hurried over to him; Edelgard's eyebrows shoot up when she sees multiple weapons somewhat awkwardly strapped to his sides, like he was acting as a human mule.

No, Reyna, human mule is Marty's job.

I'm not actually kidding, Marty's combat is just kinda bad and unreliable forever but his monstrous base con is put to use grabbing enemies off of allies to let them go after a capture is finished. He's pretty good for that!

Halvin asks Edelgard for the situation, and then,

“We must defend the church,” Edelgard said, snapping out of her surprise. “The citizens are taking shelter there. I'm not sure who's leading the attack, but I suspect they're in the process of sacking the mayor's house.”

Leif nodded and waved at the paladin. “Finn! Go and guard the church entrance with Dagdar!” The blue-haired man raises his lance in acceptance and wheels around to do so, trampling a pirate foolish enough not to get out of his way. “Halvin, tell Tanya to coordinate with the other archer here-”

“Ronan,” Edelgard put in.

“Ronan,” Leif corrected himself without losing stride. “Tell her to back up Ronin and keep up the pressure. You and Osian, protect the two of them.” His brows furrow tightly, showing both nervousness and determination. Relatively untested, most likely. Nevertheless Halvin nodded sharply and rushed off to his task.

It's not necessarily a problem that Leif is taking command, but he shouldn't be so fluid about this. He's not experienced in combat and, while he's important, he's not technically the commander of this army: Eyvel is. Additionally, unlike Finn and Eyvel, he doesn't have a leadership star (a Thracia game mechanic, for each leadership star present among your deployed units, every allied unit gains 3% hit and avo), nor does he ever have one until one of the advisors are present.

This, combined with the previous bits just kinda express a lack of understanding about what Leif's character arc is. She kinda did the same thing with Claude and Dimitri in Queen of Liberation where she immediately had both on Byleth's level, but you just can't do that with Leif even with heavy artistic license. He's not experienced, he's not wise (he makes a lot of mistakes, in fact), he's not badass, and he's not respected for his accomplishments but for his purpose as a rallying figure. Hoo boy, this'll be a long fanfic.

Then,

“Think... have to think... Eyvel?” “I'm right here, little lord.” The swordswoman – tall, blonde and noticeably older than Leif, experience radiating off even her casual walk – comes up to them as if his thoughts had summoned her. Her face is slightly weathered, prematurely aged but not nearly to the same extent as Contessa, and she smiles when she stops in front of the two of them. Leif visibly straightens up a little. “Do you have orders for me?” Leif briefly looked surprised, then visibly shakes it off. “We're going to the mayor's apartment and doing something about the leader.” He said with confidence. “Without him, the others should either scatter or flee.”

Meet the actual leader of the Fiana Freeblades.

Eyvel's one of the two Jagens I mentioned earlier. Sadly she's not around forever - or even for very long. But still, players brave a hellish gaiden chapter to save her. Truly, doing it for her.

Edelgard insists on tagging along to get the measure of Leif. He agrees after a little hesitation. As she goes, Edelgard notes the efficiency with which the Freeblades dispatch Lifis's crew, and notes the oddness that they don't have a healer with them. Thracia just be like that, Edie.

Standing outside the front door with a bag full of what few valuables the man had and looking furious at the situation was a very large slightly hunched back warrior with a massive axe.

Hunched-back!? Damn, Reyna, why you gotta do Bucks that way :( Going in real hard on the disabled, there. Anyways, Eyvel, Edelgard, and Leif rather easily team up for the Bucks kill, which is too bad, he's actually moved by your mercy and swears to turn over a new leaf if you capture him and then release him in game. Thracia is just like that: most of the bandits are treated as at least pitiable, if nothing else. Edelgard is a bit unnerved by Eyvel having a Flame Sword. Evidently one of the Agarthans had one in Queen of Liberation and it brings up old traumas.

Yes, Reyna, we remember what you the Agarthans did to her. Edelgard says they should behead Bucks and present his head to the pirates to break their spirits, and Leif, in his first moment of being squarely in character, asks if that's really necessary, only for Eyvel to agree with Edelgard. Then Leif goes right back out of character by nearly doing the deed himself before Edelgard points out an axe would work better. Baby steps, folks.

Anyways, as they catch up with the others, Edelgard notes that Ronan is out of arrows but unharmed - for which she is grateful - and Tanya (Dagdar's daughter) points out Edelgard's injured arm.

“It's a scratch,” Edelgard reassured him. Ronan stared blandly at the blood staining her sleeve and gave her an incredulous look. “A scratch that'll cost you your arm if you keep lettin' it bleed like that,” The girl observed, before holding out two vulneraries to her. “Here, these'll fix that up fully.” “My thanks,” Edelgard said, holding in her relief. She quickly takes the two vials and downs them one at a time, sighing when the wound in her arm healed up.

How do Vulneraries even work, I wonder. But yeah, about time it was pointed out Edelgard might legit lose her am if she doesn't take it more seriously. I'm still waiting for infection to be mentioned, but oh well.

As [Edelgard] went, she looked for Leif in the crowd; he was speaking to one of the older axe men and Eyvel, gesturing toward the church. He wore authority like a heavy coat, as someone unused to it and mostly acting on instinct.

You have not conveyed that well at all, Reyna. You're just informing us that he's struggling when everything we've seen so far indicates he's handling things pretty well.

Strong instinct, it seemed, but still... They must be desperate if they're having him take command now, rather than wait until he's an adult to press his claim.

It's worth pointing out that Leif's only gone forth for a rescue mission - the Imperial governor over Munster has his adopted... sister-girlfriend and Eyvel's adopted daughter captive thanks to Lifis telling the Empire where Leif was hidden. Leif is fifteen right now., which even for this series is a bit on the younger side.

What are you thinking? Planning to bolt yourself onto another righteous cause?

Well, unlike upholding the Church of Seiros, kicking the Empire (and the Loptr Church) out of Thracia is legitimately a righteous cause.

A failed conqueror

She wasn't that.

and queen of delusion;

Subtle and classy as a brick to the face, Reyna. Edelgard is an emperor, not an empress and certainly not a queen, and she was not deluded, as the game itself is all too happy to convey. I can tell that Reyna must hate Edelgard's "king of delusion" line to Dimitri to hijack her characterization and make her think of herself in this way, because oh wow did she have to stretch to make it fit.

oh yes, that's exactly what that boy needs.

I mean hell, she's the best unit in Three Houses, imagine how incredible she'd be in Thracia! Her bleak thoughts aside, Edelgard decides to help Leif see this through.

Now for a brief line from the author's notes:

It'll be fun to have Edelgard bouncing off them, because they're rather different from what she's used to.

"Edelgard isn't used to talking to non-nobles."

Her dark thoughts will be a throughline for a while now;

Please, spare us soon.

I promise, it's leading to a point in her character development.

"I was wrong, I was a foolish little girl, Rhea was good, Dimitri was wise, and Claude was amazing," isn't character development, but we'll see.

There's only one interesting thing from the comments section this time:

Edelgard does have a good head for war, it's true, and Leif sorely needs that given some of the goofs he makes in Thracia proper. I hope to take you on a wild ride of fun!

Like, Reyna knows how Leif is supposed to be but I have a feeling we won't really see it until the plot railroads her into doing it. We'll see.

That's all for this time! Like I said, not as much to cover since this was a battle, mostly, but we got some interesting stuff once Leif busted onto the scene.