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delight-angelsbliss · 4 months ago

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Hiii!!! Your ADHD post was perfect, thank you so much! I have the inattentive type as well, but I got really good at masking it/forcing myself to focus in some school classes lol (that is, if I had some sliver of interest in that class haha) I have another one, if it's ok :3

Could you maybe do shadow and sonic with a reader that is just absolutely terrible at getting proper sleep (4-3 hours 😭) who usually just can't sleep or is up doing something? Maybe hyper focused on a task? The amount of caffeine I have to consume in the morning is probably unhealthy 💀

Hope things are going great for you!

Precis: Shadow + sonic with an insomniac!Reader

Warning: side effects of no sleep and too much caffeine, no fender specified

Notes: I remember as a child (5) I would always stay awake longer to practice for ballet that I've been doing since I was 3 but I was taken out of gymnastics and ballet cuz of health issues:(( I love this blinkie too much please never leave me. I keep thinking of my step sisters and I can't stop crying knowing my dad is probably doing something to them the same way he did to me and it's eating at my heart tbh I could barely focus on writing

Sonic

We all know Sonic has massive amounts of energy, seemingly never running out of it. He isn't really a night owl type of guy, nor does he ever want to be, but when he met you, that changed. You were the complete opposite of him, always tired, staying up late, always drinking coffee etc. He didn't mind at first, but your unhealthy habits scared him greatly; you crashing out in the middle of the day was the thing that scared him the most, the way your energy turned down so fast was enough to get Sonic on the internet to try and fine some kind of help for you. He knew there were many healthy ways to get you to follow a routine. Sonic tried giving you melatonin, it worked for a few months, but it strung you out fast and you needed more to be able to sleep properly, he tried getting you some tea, but those smelled and tasted to bad you'd puke it all up.

It felt hopeless, but he didn't wanna give up helping you. You meant too much to him, you were such a nice person, yet you had the worst problems. He didn't understand it, but that didn't stop him from helping you. "Hey! [Name], let's go for a race! Whoever loses has to buy us a chili dog" he'd try to tire you out, cut your screen time and do as much as he possibly can to help you sleep. It broke sonics heart to see you so tired and strung out all day, he doesn't want to intrude too much, but he'd do anything to see you in a happy state. Besides all the chaos, Sonic doesn't mind your attitude much. He finds it kind of funny when he sees you almost falling asleep on your desk while studying.

Overall, Sonic doesn't mind it too much but he still worries daily about you, about your health. No matter what, he'll stay by your side though. He finds it fun to stay with you during the day, your calm demeanor (maybe a side effect) is like a refreshment for him, but the sudden mood swings and headaches you complain about will always bring his worry back to bloom all over again

Shadow

Shadow is also a night owl! The sun is too blinding for his brooding behavior, he'd rather watch it fall and the moon come up to greet his cold demeanor once more. He's the ultimate lifeform so he doesn't need sleep that bad, but since you're a mortal you obviously need sleep. He finds this out a few weeks into your relationship (platonic or romantic) Since he's so stubborn, he gives you an ultimatum: "It's either you sleep or you sleep on the couch" that worked for a day or two, but your bad sleeping habits, caffeine addiction, etc. Would always lull you back into staying awake doing whatever you wanted, it was your alone time. He wouldn't take that away, Shadow understands what it's like wanting to have some alone time... But he still knew how harmful this was for you

Shadow started switching your coffee with decaffeinated alternatives. The first few nights were the most rough, your body was still getting used to and adjusting to this new schedule, which helped greatly! Instead of trying to use medicines or tiring you out, Shadow tries discrete methods and ways to get you to practice better habits. Shadow knows he might not be the best for this, but he will still try and help you nonetheless. Shadow does know that you don't exactly enjoy all of this frustration from your lack of sleep, but he's baffled to know that you don't actively try to find some solutions, he doesn't mean it in a bad way... At the same time it feels like he does get angry, not at you, but your lack of motivation to help yourself. The way you continually have to go take naps just not to pass out

Shadow doesn't believe in naps, he sees them as the average way to ruin your sleep schedule. When he sees how many small naps you take just to function, it makes him worried knowing you're so tired all the time. He sees the way you strain yourself everyday, every passing second of the day. Shadow tries his best to help you, he really does. Shadow isn't the best at communication, so he doesn't see that as an option. That won't stop him from helping a loved one, Shadow isn't a very open person, but his past trauma makes his overbearing nature show easily. If overbearing helps you sleep easy, he'll stay that way

#x reader #sonic x reader #x gender neutral reader #x gn reader #sonic the hedgehog x reader #sonic reader insert #shadow the hedgehog x reader #shadow x reader #fluff headcanons #fluff #headcanons #hcs #shadow the ultimate lifeform #sonic the hedgehog #🦢﹒⁺﹒◍﹒ Rita's works ꒷ ₊ ˚

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rad-roche · 3 months ago

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hi! i love love love the way you write nick valentine so much!! if it's alright to ask, are there certain things you keep in mind when you're writing his character?

you just write him so accurately and so well, and i've been trying to nail down his flaws and motivations and how he sees the world and have been having some trouble writing him for some reason, and wanted to know if you had any tips! thank you so much— i love your comics and your fic!! ♡♡♡

thank you very much!! and sure, it's no problem :} throwing in the caveat that this is just how i do it, and i'm no authority or anything. i just do fan stuff on the internet, and there are as many ways to write something, or somebody, as there are people to do it

out the gate i have good news and bad news. the bad news is 'oh god, is this in character?' never goes away. i get it all the time! i've never not had it!

the good news is, thinking about that means you're more likely to be perceptive about what does or doesn't feel 'right'. with that in mind, always reference your source material first and foremost. skim through quest compilations, dialogue. notice what words crop up a lot, stuff like 'oughta' and colourful turns of phrase like 'the biggest chip in the pile'. you have a lot of leeway with him since he's such a throwback to a certain kind of character, so while you don't have to do what i did and go full-throttle genre pastiche, reading a couple of old detective novels won't steer you wrong vis a vis his voicing. if you just want to write nick and don't have a wider interest in the genre, any lew archer novel is a really good look at how to do it. same big, bleeding heart, same propensity to have an awful time

as for character, flaws, motivations, it's kind of a hard thing to pin down because, by merit of wanting to write something, you want to bring your own spin to it, right? you can make some pretty sweeping changes and get away with it! the only romantic interest nick expresses in the game is flirting with irma and lamenting somebody else's dead fianceé. the thing i did with him and gloria is wildly different

my big thing going into it was, since dmt/dww is third person limited, i could really play up his flaws. so from there, i could extrapolate. i think part of what makes something feel 'in character' is adding two pre-existing points together and making something new from those. stuff that isn't out of nowhere, just a couple of steps along the road. just some examples from mine:

he's a detective, so he's a good logical thinker, but he's a freak occurrence he can't untangle = he overthinks simple things, especially in regard to himself and his happiness. it's left him both selfless/deeply empathetic and a little pre-occupied with himself and his circumstances

he loves the work he does and is willing to let late payments go = the business is running at a loss, and he only operates on the fact that everybody in town owes him a favour

the original nick was sent to a trauma treatment program after the preventable death of his fiancée + he frequently makes jokes at his own expense that he clearly means/is willing to put himself in harm's way frequently = nick, down to his bones, is clinically depressed, the severity of which varies from month to month

and so on and so forth. how 'in character' this is going to vary from person to person, rightly, but i think the method is sound even if you disagree with the conclusions. people are pretty complicated and contradictory, so you can lean into that. i hope absolutely any of that made sense lol

#text post #fallout 4 #nick valentine #fo4 #dead man talking #dead woman walking #bit of a rambly one but i hope you see the vision on this #this is mostly about nick but is generally how i go about tackling fanfiction #edit: got the name wrong it's irma not myrna. whole different vibe

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livingfiction · 3 months ago

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AARON, TT, PARASOCIAL, AND SO ON IMMA SAY THIS AND LEAVE IT ALONE...

This is a lot so bear with me, but also ppl over here don't mind reading

So I've been gone for a few days and I come back to see there are some arguments, negativity, and a lot of venom in general being spewed about Aaron and TT's alleged relationship or whatever. Now, let me start this off by saying everyone is entitled to their opinions. We all have them about celebrities that we love and follow. There are times that we disapprove of their choices, especially their choice of partners. And that's fine. But lets all remember we don't know these people (hello Jonathan Majors) and we don't know Aaron personally. We can watch a million interviews and dissect every little movement and motion this man does and we can "learn" him as much as we want, but WE DO NOT KNOW THIS MAN. And I'm sorry to say this, but honestly I would have rather he popped out with a white woman cause the commotion and frenzy he and TT have caused is beyond ridiculous. I even made a post about this when she posted those pictures and EVERYBODY came out the woodwork on the internet (except here of course) to talk about how all of it was a marketing ploy to "rehabilitate" his image with black women because obviously he doesn't like black women (mind you this is based off that one picture of him and that one white woman). And now we're on here and apparently TT is too aggressive for him and he likes women that are softer and more feminine??? (and idk where that assessment came from)

[ Side note: I do find it funny that ppl are saying that about TT as black women are often thought by default to be more aggressive, angry, and masculine in comparison to non black women and ESPECIALLY in comparison to white women. And ppl have been saying he prefers white women AND "soft" feminine women-which white women are thought to be more of in comparison to black women so🤷‍♀️...very interesting to say the least]

Also apparently TT is to ghetto and hood yet there have been plenty of jokes made about Aaron being from the "hood" in London, now granted their hoods are most definitely different, but hood dudes do tend to love hood girls so once again 🤷‍♀️😂 Now idk TT's personality cause I don't keep up with her and have not tried to dissect her personality. I think her and Iman had a show at one point and I may have seen a clip or two but I can't really tell you too much about her besides the basics and that she look good as fuck. She may be ghetto, aggressive or whatever else but shit ain't nobody holding a gun to Aaron head and forcing him to interact with her, Idk what they have going on because honestly I felt like ppl jumped the gun with pics but whatever it is whether it be BF&GF/ Friends/ Fuck buddies, acquaintances, PR couple(still don't believe that but whatever) Aaron is a 30 year old grown ass man and he's capable of making his own decisions. Some people are coming across like jealous ex girlfriends and as much as we joke about this man being our husband and boyfriend we DON'T KNOW THIS NIGGA, have never been within 100 ft of him.

And tbh I shouldn't be surprised this is happening, cause when male celebrities have large female fan bases it tends too. I mean look at the One Direction boys (even now), Justin Bieber, shit even Prince Harry! I remember people on here saying that the only reason he was with Meghan when they started dating, was because he had mother issues so he chose a woman that was nothing like his mother and he was just having fun and trying something different to distract from the pain and it wouldn't last--fast fwrd to 8 yrs of marriage and two kids later (yes they was coming up with some crazy shit) No woman will ever really measure up or be good enough to the fan that knows their fave celeb apparently better than they know themselves. Hell even Lori Harvey, the quintessential soft feminine, and high class black woman wasn't good enough because apparently she's a clout chasing gold digger ( despite her coming from more money than anybody she's ever dated and her being a constant trending topic before she LITERALLY ever opened her mouth to utter a word). In case anyone is confused I saw comments claiming she said no, when someone suggested she date Aaron, because he wasn't rich or famous enough ( I made a post about that too I think) .

[Sidenote: I wasn't aware that people thought that Lori and MBJ were a PR couple too because of that whole rumor about MBJ not liking black women , WHICH AGAIN ppl seemed to have pulled that out of their asses. Till this day I have no idea where that came from. Idk if its a pattern but it seems like the only time an A-list black male celebrity dates a black woman is if it he's trying to pander to black women so he can keep collecting our money despite not liking us 🤷‍♀️]

At the end of the day Aaron is a grown man in control of his own life, including the dating and career parts. If shit starts to go side ways or off the rails professionally that's on HIM and his team. He's in control of his own destiny. We all are in my opinion. And I genuinely don't give a fuck who he's fucking or dating...for real or for fake. I'm not trying to defend TT or their relationship or whatever but I'm damn sure not going out of my way to tear her down or whatever they have. All in all this shit has gotten ridiculous.

I'm just enjoying the community we built, the love and admiration we have for him, and the bonds we've built with each other. Lets just fucking laugh and read awesome stories written by these amazing fucking writers and everybody fucking relax!!!!

Thank you. That is all loves ❤️❤️❤️❤️

#aaron pierre #mufasa #black actors #the lion king #terry richmond #black writers #rebel ridge #black actor #lori harvey #mbj #michael b jordan #black women #teyana taylor

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yukidragon · 7 months ago

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Imagine if instead of calling MC during post-nut clarity, Ian went to reddit to ask for advice? (Well, the bland-name legally-distinct version of reddit in this universe.)

Of course the comments would rip him apart and there'd be more crying, but it's kind of interesting to imagine the post he might've wrote.

For example, imagine the way Ian would describe MC in the post to other people. Would he try to justify what he did because the relationship was rocky, or would he be mostly bemoaning that he has no idea why he did it? Would he talk up MC's good qualities or slip in a lot of things that bugged him that he never brought up? What little unspoken biases would come out during the post?

I think the tone of the post would be mostly focused on how much Ian is hurting, as it is him venting to a bunch of internet strangers. He focuses on how terrible a person he feels he is, and how much he fears what's going to happen when MC finds out and how this might destroy their relationship. He just can't lose them! He can't!

I like to think Ian would have the state of mind to at least use a throwaway account and aliases for himself and others he mentions in the post. However, if MC is the type to visit those forums often, maybe even introduced Ian to them in the first place or vice-versa, it's possible MC recognizes enough details to realizes it's about them. Maybe it could even go viral and they find out about the post listening to a reading on podcast or video site.

Using my MC Alice as an example, I can imagine Ian talking about her weight and how he totally loves her in spite of how overweight she is, and she's so cute and kind. But the affair partner looked like she stepped out of a porn ecchi manga - big boobs, big butt, tiny waist, long trim legs, and incredibly flirtatious and sexually charged.

On that note, Content Warning for fatphobia, acephobia, and internalized religious-based shame!

Oh Ian had no idea it was flirting at first, he swears, but it felt so good. He never really felt like Alice really saw him as attractive since she's asexual, and she isn't all that enthusiastic about sex. It's another subconscious bias slipping through to justify himself and get sympathy despite the horrendous thing he did.

The sex with the affair partner was mind blowing, but once it was over Ian realized what he had done and felt just so awful. The affair partner tried to reassure him that it was only natural he found her more attractive (because people who tempt others to cheat in a relationship love to stroke their egos). No one has to know and they can keep having fun~

Naturally taking the affair partner takes snipes at Alice. She had done so in the past that Ian had called out in so much he offered feeble protests that Alice had good points too, while trying hard not to upset his new "friend." The comments usually were so innocuous he felt like he was overthinking it, but in the situation they were overt and insulting and he snapped at the affair partner in that moment.

Now Ian feels bad about that too since affair partner is telling him he overreacted. She tried to reassure him that everybody in a long distance relationships cheats. In fact, Alice was probably cheating on him right now. Anyone who says they're ace - in her opinion - are just lying to seem more "righteous" than they are and asexuality doesn't actually exist. Affair partner's comment that there must be somebody desperate enough to want to fuck a fat girl was what set Ian off.

Yes, my version of the affair partner is complete scum. I mean, people who tempt others to cheat tend to only care about making themselves feel superior to someone else.

The post online is a lot of word vomit with a token attempt to clean up spelling and grammar errors. Ian just keeps crying and is desperate for anyone online to tell him how he can make it up to Alice and save their relationship. He doesn't want to end the friendship with affair partner either since he knows it's his fault this happened, because he just couldn't control himself. All that internalized shame for his sexual urges bubbling to the surface. He knows he fucked up and he just wants to know how to atone for his sins.

Of course when describing Alice before describing the affair partner, Ian mentions their good points. Alice is so kind, even overtly so, holding him whenever he cried, always reaching out to others, being more motherly than his own mom. She's sweet and kind like that to everyone, and everyone loves her. She's everything he could ever want and she satisfied him in bed.

Man, imagine if Ian intended to write that Alice is everything he wanted in a partner, only to accidentally use the alias he made up for the affair partner instead of the one he used for Alice.

I mean, easy mistake to make, right? He's using fake names he just made up on the spot. Of course he's going to mix them up. He even insists as such when a comment calls him out for it before he can fix it in an edit. It was just a typo!

Ian admits that he felt guilty about subjecting Alice to his sexual urges. He knows sexual urges are sinful. She's asexual and doesn't really initiate sex but is always eager to please him anyway. She's always been like an angel to him and to everyone. Sex with her sometimes made him feel like a filthy sinner like he was desecrating something too pure and good for this world in the name of his shameful urges.

The affair partner though... Ian admits she's exciting, thrilling, so open in discussing sex like it's no big deal. She flaunts her body, confident in a way Alice isn't. The two of them are like night and day. When he had sex with the affair partner he didn't feel like he was defiling an angel. He admits he doesn't know what he was thinking, but it was the most intense, raw, and amazing sex he's ever had.

Which makes Ian feel even more like absolute shit for enjoying it so much.

Perhaps the allure Ian felt, aside from the physical attraction, was that he didn't feel like he was dragging someone else down. They were both filthy sinners acting like animals, only focusing on the pleasure and not thinking about consequences. He didn't think about the future, or about guilt and shame... at least not until after the post-nut clarity hits.

Even if Ian had this irrational feeling that sex with Alice was wrong, he knows it's wrong with the affair partner. In the afterglow, cuddling with Alice made him feel safe, accepted, loved, and like what they experienced wasn't as dirty and sinful as he felt. The aftercare soothed his worries and made him feel like what they had was actually pure and good and full of love.

The afterglow with the affair partner felt wretched. Ian immediately wanted to throw up. It was all wrong. He still can't understand why he got caught up in it like he did when he knows it's wrong... but in the moment it felt so good.

Another piece of advice Ian requests of the people of the forum is how to stop thinking about the sex he had with the affair partner so that he never gets tempted again. All he wants is to be happy with Alice, his partner, the woman he wanted to marry since they were kids!

The comments, naturally, tear Ian apart, but some scumbags support him, insulting Alice due to his description of her and saying what he did was only to be expected. If she wanted to keep him, she should've tried harder and lost weight.

While Ian doesn't respond to every comment, he responds to many. To those raking him over the coals, you can practically see the tears spilling onto the phone screen as he types that he knows he's a piece of shit, but he came here to get advice on how to fix things! Alice is the only one he wants to be with! He never wanted this to happen!

Ian makes an edit to the post in response to the scumbags, pleading with people not to insult Alice. He tries to protect her honor, talks even more about so many good qualities about her, and how these people don't even know her or understand!

He also insists this post isn't rage bait or farming for attention.

Ian also slips in that he knows Alice would forgive him even if he told her, since she's just that kind and forgiving of a person, but she would be crushed. She's already put up with so much over the years and still loves him. He can't handle what this will do to her. He doesn't want to break her heart over something so selfish and vile. He can't believe he did something so stupid, but he just wants to know how to fix this without hurting her.

In a way, Ian irrationally fears that he's now just like these scumbags in the comments due to his cheating. The things they say about her... did he subconsciously think them? Is he really such a horrible person? The ones trying to justify what he did are so vile, and the rest are condemning him and hoping that Alice dumps him.

Ian was hoping to get advice, and he does, a little. There are some people in the comments that take a more soft approach to chastising him. In the end, their encouragement is just confess and go to couple's therapy.

Ian resisted going to therapy all this time because of hearing negative things about it, how pointless it is (mainly from his mother), but he decides that's the best shot they have. He'll do anything to fix this now.

Ultimately, the comments make him fear telling Alice all the more given how much hatred he got for his post.

Ian does post updates in the aftermath. First that he broke down and told Alice. She forgave him and they're going to try and make it work. He doesn't specify how, just that they talked a lot and many tears were shed. Though he got so much hate online, some of the advice did seem to help, so he's back to vent more and get more advice. He'll suffer the hate if it means atoning for his sins.

Oh there's also a brief mention of Alice going to the hospital for a while, but Ian mostly focuses on how awful he feels and how it must be his fault, without going into details out of respect for her privacy.

Then there'd be another update from Ian later on about how Alice ended things, and he's devastated. He was so confused by it, as if it came out of the blue. They were working on fixing things! He thought things would get better, but then she told him that she just couldn't do it anymore right now. She needs some space.

Ian goes into self-pitying mode, knowing it's his fault and he messed up, but he thought things were going to be okay. What does he do now? How does he fix things? What did he mess up after things seemed to be getting better?

Then an edit is thrown in that Ian found out Alice's friends apparently talked her into breaking up with him. She still says she needs space to think before they can try again. Ian can't blame them given all the comments roasting him, but he was trying! He really was! How can he prove that?

At this point the comments are just all telling Ian to leave Alice alone and let her move on. It's over. Even the more empathetic posters don't have advice for him this time.

Hmm... Ian might not have gone to a forum for advice right after cheating in Sunshine in Hell, but I like the idea that he sought out advice after he confessed what he did to Alice. He might've even been a regular poster to online forums for advice anonymously in the past.

Of course if Alice stumbled across the post and realized it was Ian who made it, it'd make her feel even more violated than before. She'd be the type to read way too much into how Ian talked about her and the affair partner, particularly when people in the comments called him out for how he phrased certain things.

If nothing else, it'd make Alice feel more certain that Ian wouldn't be happy in a relationship with her in the long term. It'd also tear her apart to hear in his own words just how much he's suffering.

The post would haunt Alice at the back of her mind, the hate comments and Ian's little offhand remarks in the posts picking at her insecurities.

Naturally, Alice would avoid those forums for a while, as well as anyplace else Ian might be lurking online. Even posts that seem sort of similar give her this feeling of paranoia that it might be him vague posting about her again. Finally, she decides to just take a break from the internet as much as humanly possible, including socials.

Wow, this little off the wall what if scenario grew into something much bigger than anticipated. I hope you all enjoyed this idea, as well as how I applied it to Alice and Ian's relationship. If you did, perhaps consider what sort of post Ian might make about his relationship with your MC and the fallout from that. Have fun!

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur @kurokrisps

#Sunny Day Jack #Something's Wrong With Sunny Day Jack #SunnyDayJack #sdj #swwsdj #Headcanon Ramblings #Ask

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girldirectionfest · 7 months ago

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Girl Direction Fest 2024 Masterpost

When Harry Met Louis by @disgruntledkittenface 45k M Larry The first time Harry and Louis met, they hated each other. The second time they met, Louis didn’t even remember Harry. The third time they met, they became friends. They were friends for a long time. And then they weren’t.

boobs. by @justanotherghostblr 4k T Nouis “Jesus, Lou.” Harry released her shoulders. “You are not interested in anyone for ages and now you had to fall for Niall of all people? Seriously?” “Well, I didn’t really stand a chance tonight, did I?” Harry dropped her towel and turned to her wardrobe to get dressed. “I mean you could definitely do worse than Niall. They’re the best. And currently single. But you didn’t hear that from me.” “Really?” Louis would say she probably had hearts in her eyes looking hopefully at Harry, but let’s be real: it was definitely boobs. OR Louis accidentally catches Niall in the nude and falls in love with their boobs and after that with them.

feels like home by @feellikehome28 6k NR Larry “Here,” Harry said, taking off her left glove. “You can have one of mine. Just so your hand doesn't freeze.” “What, no, Harry, what about your hands?” Louis pushed Harry’s hand back. Harry shrugged. “I don’t mind the cold.” Louis smiled and it was like the sun reflected on her face, the corners of her eyes crinkled and her eyes twinkled. Harry was happy she had finally made a friend. prompt: An AU based on Taylor Swift's 'It's Nice To Have a Friend.'

Tremor: Sweet Everything by @littleohs 5k M Larry “It's not time to sleep yet, alpha. I'm not done yet.” Harry quickly wiped her hand on a corner of the sheet before holding Louis' face with both hands, forcing her to look at her. The alpha was exhausted, her lips half open and her skin damp with sweat, but still, her eyes shone with a devotion that only fueled Harry's arousal. "You've got more to give me, babe,” Harry murmured, her tone low but full of authority, her thumbs traced slow circles over Louis' flushed cheeks. “I know you can, can't you?” or, the second part of trenigh.

Better Swim Before You Drown by @fifthnormani 21k T Zarry pre-slash Zayn just got hired as bodyguard to the princess. The pay and benefits are good, and she's great at what she does, but it's far from her dream job when Princess Harry turns out to be the most spoiled, stuck up, entitled brat she's ever met. At least, she is at first.

Baby I Can Love You Better by @homosociallyyours 35k E Larry Harry is relatively new to the lively queer two-step dancing community in the Bay Area, brought in by her friend Niall. When she sees Niall's friend Louis across the dance floor, she's instantly smitten. It's possible that Louis might be taken, but Harry is happy enough to keep their relationship friendly-- Louis is a great dancer, and seems to love teaching Harry new moves, and Harry can definitely use a friend. But sometimes chemistry can't be denied, and with the way Louis leads her so naturally, Harry would follow her anywhere, especially into love.

I Just Wanna Get to Know Ya by @parmahamlarrie 5k E Larry Meeting Harry Styles three months ago might just be the best thing that's ever happened to Louis Tomlinson. All that's left before she takes the leap in making Harry her girlfriend is a night out with her mates. What she never expected is for one of her mates to recognise her girl from the internet. Or, the miscommunication porn star AU

Collection Link

#girl direction #girl direction fest 2024 #girl direction fest 2024 masterpost #hlsource #hlcreators #1dficfests #girldirectionsource #femslash #larry fanfiction

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siren-nate · 5 months ago

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An analysis of the Dark Lord through their relationship with Chosen

I see a lot of people say that Dark shouldn't be brought back in Season 3, because them getting a redemption arc would be hard to take seriously or be straight-up out of character. Unlike Purple, King, Victim, and Chosen, they don't have any underlying reason for their evil - no revenge plan, no person they're trying to win the approval of, they're just a murderous supervillain because it's fun.

I disagree. First of all, since when is not having an underlying reason for evil a reason that a character can't be redeemed? Alan didn't have a reason to torment Victim, but he's still considered a good guy because he realized his creations are truly alive and started empathizing with them and treating them better. Chosen didn't have a reason to rampage across the internet for so long, but he's still considered a good guy because he had a change of heart and tried to clean up the mess left behind by his friendship with Dark. So why is Dark different?

As a quick disclaimer: I'm not going to try and justify anything Dark has ever done in this. They're an unrepentant monster who does definitely enjoy causing chaos, destruction, pain, and death. The only thing I'm arguing is that they're more complex than the pure-evil-for-the-fun-of-it supervillain that the fandom tends to paint them as.

Let's go by timeline. First of all, I think it's interesting that Dark is the only hollowhead who didn't immediately have a negative relationship with Alan. Victim looked around in confusion and fear even before Alan started screwing with them, Chosen went on the offensive instantly, and Second tried to keep her existence hidden because of her well-founded fear of deletion.

By contrast, Dark seems to just look around and then start doing stretches while Alan is coding up his purpose, one that he takes to like a fish to water.

I've talked before about how I think Alan's mindset in the moment he makes a hollowhead defines their core character and nature, and I think this is further proof of it. The only stick figure that he purposefully brought to life, but doesn't have any negative intentions for, instinctively understands him to be an ally.

One thing that I think goes overlooked is that Dark is a bit of a paper tiger. Despite being one of the most powerful and dangerous characters in the entire series, they're a lot less fearless than Chosen is. They not only plead for their life when Chosen has them dead-to-rights, they almost curl up in the fetal position and tremble.

They also panic when the computer starts going down, unlike Chosen who stays focused and immediately figures out an escape route.

Thus begins their combined rampage across the internet. Again, I'm not going to try and justify this - I think Dark was made to be a weapon, but he also clearly enjoys being a weapon. But there was one small thing in episode 11 that had me thinking.

Previously, we were led to believe that Chosen just never showed any signs of his growing discomfort to Dark, that him stopping them from launching Virabot was the first time he ever showed any sign of it. But now, we know that he did show signs prior - or at least, that he had Dark's attention when he was unintentionally showing signs.

I don't think it's impossible that Dark just brushed this off and thought nothing of it, but what if they did notice? What if they saw Chosen's lack of enthusiasm compared to how he used to be, and started thinking about it? Keep that in mind as we move further.

Now we get to the big scene. The confrontation.

What I find notable about the falling out between Chosen and Dark is how still they both are. We've seen plenty of examples of stick figures communicating across the series - even when they don't make little pictographs (and who knows if those are actually diegetic or not), they gesture pretty extravagantly and use a ton of body language to get across to the viewer that a conversation is happening.

This? Nothing. Chosen grabs their hand, shakes his head, shoves them away, and then throws them when they don't get the hint before trying to figure out how to shut off the cannon.

There's nothing to indicate Chosen's explaining his reasons here. In fact, if he isn't explaining anything and is just saying they shouldn't do this, that makes Dark's reaction a lot more understandable; they don't get why Chosen is having this reaction, so it seems obstinate and out of nowhere.

I'm not saying this is Chosen's fault - he's in the middle of his crisis of conscience, and Dark still massively overreacted. But I think it's worth noting that he seems to just not be the best at communication in general. Remember how he completely failed to get across why he thought Second had powers and resorted to just grabbing her and running when he needed her help against the mercs? Same deal as this!

We all know what comes after. They briefly fight, Dark launches the Virabot, Chosen punches them into the distance. I think what's REALLY interesting is their next meeting.

Reminder, the last time that these two saw each other, Chosen punched Dark so hard they went flying. But when he opens the door and steps in, posture neutral?

Dark is the same. They seem a little put off, maybe, but the punch that comes after takes them completely by surprise.

Despite Chosen being in plain view and them being equals in speed and combat skill, Dark doesn't even react to the punch until right before it sends them flying.

In fact, they STILL only BARELY react to the punch that came after, blocking it at the last moment rather than parrying or countering. And when it sends them flying all over again, there's this moment where they're hanging on the edge of bay, staring at Chosen - like they're stunned. They're in pure shock over what he's doing.

When they finally do counterattack with that massive explosive fireball, they pause afterwards, staring at the explosion and then just kind of... standing there.

Staring at the explosion, sure, they could have just been making sure Chosen was actually dead or incapacitated. But staring off into nothing? It feels, at least to me, like they're thinking hard about what they just did. Even if they're not necessarily upset, they're at least unsure.

All of this is to say one thing: despite their last interaction going so sour, Dark genuinely didn't expect Chosen to get violent. They seemed at most a little surprised to see him enter the computer shack, and it takes two massive, earth-shaking punches for it to finally sink in and for them to hit back.

It might seem like Dark is just an idiot for not expecting "throwing an explosive fireball at my one and only friend in a fit of anger" to not have immediate consequences, but then again - have you seen the way Dark and Chosen treat other people?

Compared to the horrific things they did in their rampage, Dark genuinely thought that the fight they and Chosen had wasn't a big deal. They understood there would be sore feelings, but they didn't at all realize that Chosen considered that the end of their friendship - that the moment he found Dark again, he would be immediately fighting with intent to kill or grievously incapacitate.

I think it's also worth noting that throughout the fight, Dark doesn't seem to be having any fun. We know that they love to cause violence and kill, and they do show some of their usual hammy mannerisms when they taunt Alan, specifically.

But when it's just them and Chosen? Nothing. Just cold, calculated execution. And yet, they don't take out the disintegrating wristblade unless he's actively fighting back - once they have him at their mercy, completely defeated with nobody else to interrupt, they don't finish the job. They don't even attempt to. They seem like they're about to attack before Second interrupts, but it's bare-handed - then they take out the blade to make quick work of the color gang, and after that, they just leave Chosen alive.

Finally, there's the wristbands themselves. Thanks to my friend @ellielectric pointing something out about them when I showed the series to her, they're the keystone to this whole thing. Most people I've seen talk about them assume that Dark either A) just wanted to be a more efficient killing machine or B) anticipated a fight with Chosen at some point and made them "just in case". In both of these options, Dark made them because they viewed Chosen as more powerful or dangerous than them - but I think there's another possibility.

It's notable that the wristband becomes wristbands, plural, midway through the fight - but it's even more notable that this seems to be unnecessary for their function.

You'd think "they need two wristbands for dual-wielding", but here they are manifesting both swords with only one. It's only later on that the wristband duplicates.

And, really - why did the wristband need to make Dark so ridiculously strong? It lets them utterly humiliate Chosen, far more than just being assured they could defeat him. And even if they expected their friendship with Chosen to go south, there's no way they would have anticipated having to fight him and Alan at the same time. And yet, just by putting it on, Dark becomes an equal threat to both of them working together.

"Did they need a reason to not make it so strong?" No, but they needed a reason to make it in the first place - they seemed perfectly content just with their usual pyrokinesis for four straight years of rampaging, if not longer. So what changed?

Chosen changed.

Dark has literally only known destruction. It's what they were made for, and it's all they did either for or with the only two allies they've ever had. Chosen was just as gung-ho about it for years... until he suddenly started showing less enthusiasm. Dark clearly didn't understand he was having second thoughts about morality, but if they did notice, what did they think?

They thought Chosen was getting bored.

They thought all of the destruction and chaos was getting too similar for his liking. They thought he would want an improvement. Dark made the Virabots specifically to impress Chosen, the one who had walked this path of carnage with them for so long.

Why did the wristbands make Dark so strong? Why were they designed to duplicate even if it was unnecessary?

One of them was meant for Chosen. Dark never intended to wear both of them.

#Animator vs. Animation #Animator vs Animation #Alan Becker #The Chosen One #The Dark Lord #TCO #TDL

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thatdogmagic · 2 months ago

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re: this pointless shit again

Well, I'd done pretty good ignoring this as I promised I would, but a third party meddler made that impossible, so here we go.

So, as some of you may know, and some of you may not, pretty much every time I post an update to the website, a trio of stalkers jump on my every word and go on a posting blitz. These are people who very openly just want me ostracized from every community I'm in, at a time when community matters more than anything, and they've proven that they'll invest over a year's worth of time into making that happen.

There are a series of posts about it listed here. I suggest people read Ependa's post especially because she keeps getting ignored in all of this.

I honestly think I took too much of the responsibility for what all happened in the posts that are still up, but it is what it is. I was doing my best to be gracious and diplomatic about it. More's the pity.

Anyway I suppose I should be flattered by the level of effort involved in all of this, but it's still a pain in the ass. I've done my best to ignore it, and was overall managing pretty well, but that was before a third party decided to involve themselves to stir shit and/or score internet points.

In March, after the most recent update and rollout of commission prices, someone kindly reached out to let me know that there was some exclusive werewolf artist telegram group chat going on. Effectively a kind of clubhouse, with a pretty wide range of people in my peer group. The owner followed me, and had gone as far as to send me DMs in the past, but to my knowledge had never extended an invite.

They did, however, extend an invite to one of my stalkers, who, again, for the past full year and change, has been openly calling for me to be publicly ripped apart and ostracized.

This person has not been at all shy about that. The owner nonetheless platformed them for a couple weeks. During that time, they went on near daily rants about me specifically. So far as I've been told, I was pretty much all they could talk about, before they dropped out of the chat on their own accord.

I can't say that the owner was intentionally drama-mongering or not, but it doesn't really matter, at this point. I have a hard time imagining that they didn't know this was going on, however, and have blocked accordingly.

Now, as I said, there was only one person that reached out, and I'm grateful they did. But it is only one out of 70+ individuals, which doesn't feel great. I mean, this is the same community of peers for whom I'm trying to build an entire website. Which was already a lot of work with a lot of uncertainty. Now, suddenly, it was more of both.

I'm bringing this up because, even before all this, uncertainty was a daily issue I had to grapple with regarding this issue. This situation has made me feel like I have to keep track of every moot on a near-daily basis to make sure they haven't suddenly unfollowed. It's made me have to assume every unfollow in my peer group is due to someone buying into the drama.

Some of you have caught mutes or blocks that may have been undeserved as a result. I'm sorry about that; I'm just not interested in taking chances with this, and I don't want someone who may fully believe all the nonsense to have access to me on sites I want to post on comfortably, among friends.

In addition to having to keep all that in mind, I also just generally have to brace for the fact that, every single time I post a site update, I'm in for another round of bloviating. Which isn't fun, but it's decidedly less fun when I have to care about a) any of it, at all, in any capacity, b) how intense it is this time around, c) who fell for it.

It was a lot to keep in mind already. On top of all the actual work involved. It made writing and coding all of these updates even more of a chore, which is arguably the point of the harassment campaign , but, I digress.

So, needless to say, hearing about this, that this was not only allowed, but that people more or less sat passively by...

My motivation was already on shaky ground. And I'm not too proud to say that this effectively killed it.

It's not that I think all the folks in the group chat are awful; I think many of you just plain wanted to stay out of it, which, for the record, I appreciate. But, things being the way they are currently, you unfortunately now represent a level of uncertainty that is way too much for me to take on.

That is to say: I would rather not have to care about unfollows, at all. I would rather not have to care about whether or not someone believes the bullshit. I need to stop caring about it, period. I need as few reasons to care about it as possible, which means shedding a couple-few of them where I can.

So-- for my own sake, I'm stepping away from the idea of this being a larger community site. It's instead going to focus on folks that Angela and I already trust and have worked well with in the past, including alums from the original Werewolves Versus run.

Like I said: I already can't tell the difference between someone who just wants to stay out of it, and someone bought in to all the bullshit. I can't tell the difference between an unfollow for 'eh too much porn these days' reasons, and 'I fully believe she's a ~horrible transphobic rot~ on this earth and should be fully ostracized from the community' reasons.

It's all been a little too 'high school but super high stakes' for me. And in the year 2025, I have to admit to myself that I just don't have the energy for it. Not with fash breathing down our necks every day of the week. Quite literally on the day I've been drafting this, my state governor had to release a statement about how the Feds are threatening to arrest him.

That's the very real uncertainty we're up against right now. Adding 'now regularly give a shit about the fallout of some petty internet drama' on top of it is too much to ask.

We'll leave ourselves open to bringing in additional creators as time goes on, but yeah, the grand vision for the place needs to be set aside in favor of something more manageable. 'Cause, end of the day, I only ever wanted to work on my own shit, and facilitate others being able to work on theirs. The community thing was just a lofty idea tacked on, and it's one that'd be better off being left behind so I can focus on the actual work, and not the popularity contest.

The good news is we're still going to be a small collective of werewolf artists. We're still going to go through with our general mission statement. But our roster is primarily going to be more made up of people we already know, trust, interact with regularly, etc, versus the goal of building up a mod/volunteer team, and eventually taking applications for galleries from the community at large. Someone else with the time, energy and money can take up that task.

And speaking of: now that I've stepped away, as my stalkers were clearly hoping I would, I hope the people in their lives and in their friend circles tell them it's okay to move on to actual projects now. To put all this effort into their own community sites and studios (that are completely real and attached to completely real LLCs). They've got all this energy freed up now, so they should be able to do great things with it, I'm sure.

To anyone who might have gotten their hopes up about what this site could've been: I'm genuinely sorry.

To everyone else: our audience has been wonderful to us generally, through all of this. Thank you for sticking with us, and for believing in us.

And to the hate watchers: stay mad I guess. It's your life, do with it what you want.

#admin #any replies are going to be deleted #even the positive ones #This isn't a discussion #This is hopefully the final word on the whole asinine thing

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honeyhonest · 19 hours ago

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✧˖°. with an autistic/adhd reader

warnings: mostly romantic, gn reader, SFW! but I'm not tagging it, autistic and adhd are separate, vague mentions of self-harming behavior, uhhh, not a one-size fits all thing so keep that in mind, I HAD MORE TO SAY BUT. ironically I lost motivation. sinclair I hope I did you justice o7

characters: idy!

length: longform headcanons

✧˖°. with autism

I do think Idia is autistic and would thrive with an autistic partner

srsly, best guy to date if you don't want to change your whole routine. he hates when people try to step in and intervene on things they don't understand in his life. so, no, he's not going to cramp your style in any attempt to ~fix you~ even in the name of health or self-improvement

that's not to say that Idia isn't accommodating; he's really very thoughtful and generous. and he's got a great memory, and a word doc with all of your preferences and personal info: your safe foods, noises and smells that bother you, your favorite stuff... yeah, whatever, you get it. and he stocks up accordingly and is always the best at getting gifts. bc, again, thoughtful

Ignihyde is like autism central in terms of sensory input. easily adjustable lighting, temperature, AND those walls are totally soundproof, I just know it (<- all of this said by Idia as he tries to trick you into moving in with him. whuh where did this pomegranate come from!!!)

I think one of his biggest weaknesses is that he REALLY can't force himself to care about something that he... well, doesn't. so he's not going to be the type of partner to lovingly listen to you ramble about something he doesn't understand (not that he won't; he just won't be very invested) but he WILL try to find common ground. he'll rec an anime he likes if he thinks there's something in it you'll enjoy, too! don't take his suggestions as pushy, he's trying to bond with you the best he can. and he expects the same treatment in return!

he does like to feel useful and smart, though, so it's not like he needs 100% alignment in your interests. let him fix your electronics for you, he gets REALLY into it

Idia is not necessarily equipped to handle meltdowns; he panics. he's more empathetic than he gives himself credit for, and seeing you in pain hurts him, too. that said, he CAN lock the fuck in, as he would say. if you're starting to melt down in public because of the noise or light or sounds or amount of people, Idia goes STYX mode and routes the best possible escape plan in his head while making the least amount of fuss, so you at least have the dignity of panicking in private. Idia also has meltdowns, but they're very internal, and so you won't even notice until you see his hands and they're picked raw because he had to regulate those emotions somehow. he hates to be touched in the moment (seriously; don't. he wouldn't EVER touch you when you're not in the right headspace, either) but in the aftermath of a meltdown, when he's all worn out and emotionally drained, he doesn't mind the company. he'll tend to your self-inflicted injuries if you'll tend to his! haha

I think the best form of care from him, though, is that you can tell he's never judging you for it. he could never find you embarrassing or weird. even if you got triggered by something really silly

...he might even share some own stories of "silly" things that triggered a meltdown for him. a fork was too long, internet wouldn't connect fast enough, he could feel hair on his neck and was sweating at the same time. yeah

also good? he never takes offense to you needing alone time. which should be like, a fucking given, BUT YOU KNOW how people get. he's actually not going to freak out and go yandere on you if you forget/are too overwhelmed to answer a text. all he asks is for the same grace in return

ALSO also good? Idia always says what he means. he'll keep things to himself if he doesn't feel like sharing, sure! but he's not going to play normie mind games with you. if anything he's TOO earnest and speaks his mind TOO much, which is actually a very endearing thing to do. IMO!!!

in more emotional dysregulation-type situations, I think Idia is perfect. massively depressed, panicking or scared, frustrated and overwhelmed, he's not going to let you spiral. he's just not. he's been there before himself, after all. it might take him a thousand years to convince you that you're not embarrassing, or gross, or the worst person alive, he doesn't actually get tired of doing that, because he needs the same kind of reassurance himself

he thrives in a relationship based on understanding. that's all. if you like to be touched then he is holdings you so niceys

✧˖°. with adhd

I do not think Idia has adhd, so the reactions here are going to be a tad different because he's in less of a place of understanding

one of his greatest strengths, for example, is also one of his biggest flaws: he's a problem-solver

which is like, okay, great! unless you've spent your whole life feeling infantilized and useless for not functioning like everyone else. if you're that person, then most/any attempts to help you with simple tasks can feel like an attack or a challenge to prove yourself

Idia doesn't really get it, though. he's very self-sufficient, but he's not one to complain when ortho completes a task for him, or when his dorm members take some of his housewarden duties off his shoulders. but he does get that it's a sensitive topic with you, so rather than stepping in and trying to control your schedule or influence your habits (playing mommy with you, to put it plainly) he'll prefer to offer you solutions before he enforces them

does that mean it doesn't bug him when you refuse to be helped with some things? ...no. like I said, Idia is a problem-solver, and he's extremely empathetic (unhealthily so!) towards people he cares about. he hates to see you struggling

but he knows that you're not a child; he would be pissed if someone decided they knew better than him just because he has trouble doing some things, too

I actually think Idia would be really great help on the academic side. much like the counseling department, NRC's disability accommodations are likely... non-existent! we're talking about ancient ass scrolls with no audiobook equivalents, hours-long classes, and an intense study schedule with no room for error. fall back a little and suddenly you're a month behind everyone else. Idia? he's got all of those texts digitized so you can ctrl + f your way through them. he's convincing the Headmage that all of the classrooms need cameras, and then hacking into them to record lectures. Ortho can scan any book and within a few hours, produce a reliable audiobook equivalent. and more!!

no one is doing it like him, babeyyyy!

though he's very self-motivated, and he's not one to coddle you like an overprotective parent, Idia's not going to deny you little things, either. if you need help finding something you misplaced, or if you need him to get you something even if it's just across the room, he's going to do that for you. none of that "you need to learn to do things for yourself!" bullshit when it comes to executive dysfunction. shaming you for it isn't going to make it go away

since his focus and motivation also come and go in waves, he gets it when you're just not feeling something, or just can't force yourself to get into a task. he's not exactly one to judge on short attention spans and sporadic bursts of manic energy

on the cutie side, when it comes to things you enjoy, he'll help you through bad episodes of "can't do anything". like if can't find the motivation to make art when you really want to, he'll trick you into talking to him about your ideas instead, just to get them out of your head so they stop Torturing you

reminds you that you are the most special and awesome and smart person he knows every day, whether or not you're being productive

being neurodivergent partners, to me, is shouldering half the burden of being alive in a world that wasn't made for you, with each other. and Idia is SS tier in that regard

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diamondcitydarlin · 10 months ago

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'time for round two of making teenagers uncomfortable on the internet'

Listen. No one is shipping beetlebabes for the sole purpose of 'making teenagers uncomfortable on the internet'. Unless the adults in question are your parents/guardians, none of them are responsible for the stuff you might see while being 'on the internet'. None of them are responsible for your discomfort from what you might see. None of them are obligated to stop having fun in their own fandom spaces simply because a teenager exists 'on the internet' who doesn't like it (who is also perfectly capable of staying out of places they don't want to see, I PRESUME) no more than adults at a bar are obligated to not drink because there are people under the age who can't (fittingly, most bars in the US don't admit people under the age at all). You know who is responsible? Depending on your age of teenagedom, it's either to some extent your parents/guardians, but also you. Yeah, sweetie, you. I've been on the internet since the late 90's when I was NINE and I'm here to tell you right now that learning how to cultivate your own experience online is an extremely important tool. If you don't learn now how to keep your nose out of things that you don't like, you're going to have a very hard time filled with round-about arguments and constant drama and maybe worse when you could just be having fun with the things you do like and ignoring the stuff you don't. You see, my sweet summer child, feeling 'discomfort' about something benign does not inherently give you the right to shit all over whatever it is that made you uncomfortable or make up insinuations about the consenting adults participating in it. Unless there are people dropping shipping art into your inbox against your will or something (there aren't) it actually is none of your business at all, and doesn't concern you in the least. Like my goodness, you kids have ALL kinds of protections you can use to weed out things you don't want to see that we didn't have back when I was a 'teenager on the internet', blocking, blacklisting, browser extensions that can help with that, etc, and yet somehow we seem to have better understood back then how to mind our own business and stay out of fandom spaces we didn't want to be in. Nowadays all I see are children running into the devil's sacrament uninvited and claiming to be personally affected by said sacrament when all of us are wondering what the fuck they're doing there in the first place when there are clear signs denoting what sacrament this is. You don't have to see the movie, you don't have to see shipping content, you don't have to be 'exposed' to any of this at all; in this day and age, you choose to be, which makes any discomfort you feel as a result of that your own responsibility. The only person making 'teenagers uncomfortable on the internet' in this specific instance are the teens themselves.

And again, a little crash course in history here since the education system probably failed you, but using simply the existence of children as an excuse for why adults can't do consenting adult activities with each other has historically been used as a way to demonize and weaponize violence against marginalized groups. Yall are literally just stealing pages from homophobic/misogynistic/racist/transphobic conservative playbooks. That may not be your ultimate goal in coming after fandom spaces, but it's where that kind of behavior and thinking always ends up in the end. If you think alt-right entities won't harness that sense of youthful moral outrage for their own ends then I have a bridge to sell you.

Anyway, point being, no random adult on the internet or IRL is responsible for you. Random adults on the internet or IRL are not your parents/guardians. They have no obligation to eschew their own interests just because kids are wandering into places where they shouldn't. I honestly worry for any child on the internet who thinks this way, because there are absolutely predators out there that will abuse this sense of 'every adult is responsible for my comfort'. They aren't, and I'm sorry the adults in your life that actually are responsible for you failed you so much as to not teach you otherwise. Unlearn this now before you get hurt, please.

#beetlebabes #i would say im preaching to the choir but i know people who should see this are sneaking in here #im confident of that now lol #-goes to cheese convention- WHAT THE FUCK THERE'S CHEESE HERE?? IM LITERALLY A MINOR #i saw this on an @nti post and had to say something this drives me up the wall lol #you are not my child i am not responsible for you ok?

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batmanisagatewaydrug · 1 year ago

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hi. I heard you answer questions about sex ed and I can't ask anyone this irl since none of my friends talk about any sex that isn't super cishet and allo.

I'm kind of worried I'm asexual and of course I'm ok with other people doing whatever they want with their lives and not having sex whenever and however they want, but I really don't want to not have sex. Except that whenever I think about having sex with a person I'm instantly disinterested. like even fantasizing about myself having sex in a nonspecific disembodied way turns me off.

I worried for a while that it was because I was scared of my body (like a vagina-fear/dysphoria sort of thing, which was probably true) or just didn't have any sex drive, so to figure it out I started trying to masturbate when I was sixteen (my parents tracked my search history on my phone so I actually had to go to the library and find a sex ed book in the adult section and hide the cover with my jacket while I read it just to memorize the diagrams so I could figure out where the hell the clitoris was lmao) and I did like it and was capable of feeling good and orgasming and whatever. but even after I knew that it felt good and I do have a sex drive I'm still not interested in having sex with other people (I'm eighteen now for context, so its been a while). I can't think of one person I would ever even theoretically want to have sex with, including people I know, famous hot people, fictional characters, nothing. I don't want to be asexual but I feel like I have to be because I don't want to have sex with anyone. How can I be asexual if I don't want to be, or am I even asexual? what if I just have high standards, or I haven't met someone I really like yet? what if I am ace and I'm just being ace-phobic because I've internalized the cultural norms that 'sex equals humanity'? I keep having this mental loop where I think about possibly being asexual then I conclude that I'm definitely not asexual then I start thinking about it again. I know I'm supposed to define my own identity, but if I think I'm allo but all of my feelings are the types of feelings everyone says is ace, then what am I?

obviously you're not the mind-reading wizard rabbi of the internet so you can't divine my sexuality from an ask, but do you at least have any advice for figuring it out?

thanks for listening, sorry for the tmi

hi anon,

let's take a big deep breath and calm down a little, okay? it seems like you're overthinking yourself to bastard death and that's not going to help anything at all.

listen, man: the only thing that makes someone asexual is if they decide that's something they want to call themselves. like it's literally just a word to use or not use, and it sounds like you really don't want to use it. labels are meant to be helpful in letting people express something about themselves, so if a label doesn't spark joy, don't use it. simple as that. not wanting to call yourself asexual is no more phobic than me not calling myself a lesbian - I don't have a problem with lesbians, I just personally don't happen to be one.

it sounds like the main thing getting you down here is that you're 18 and like jacking off but haven't ever super wanted to have sex with someone, which is, like, oh man that's so normal. some people just don't have a very high sex drive as it pertains to other people, dude. you've likely only met an extremely small portion of the people you're going to meet in your entire life, and you're going to have feelings and relationships and experiences you can't even begin to imagine with all the people you're yet to meet.

in the meantime, let's channel all of the energy you're spending worrying about being asexual into something that will actually make your life cooler and more fun. might I recommend reading a nice book or perhaps doing some manner of art?

#sex edventures 2024

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clangenrising · 5 months ago

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I'll be honest, I'm not sure how to feel about Moon 20. I was raised on purity culture and because of that sex is an uncomfortable topic for me, even though I wish it wasn't. I was exposed to that sorta stuff young (not sa, just unrestricted internet access lol) and it did sorta traumatize me, so I just find it disturbing to include sexual references in content that A, is made for a fandom primarily intended for children (which a content creator has to keep in mind regardless of if their content is actually for children imo) and B, has a cast of animals (I'm not saying this equals zoophilic content, but it still feels weird from where I'm standing. I know animals have sex and that it's normal, but I don't want to read about that).

I understand your argument and I appreciate that you offered trigger warnings, though. Idk, part of me wants to be supportive of content that doesn't kink shame and instead educates about different kinks, but I also see why people are getting upset over that moon.

You say that it's first and foremost fiction so even zoophilic content would be fine, but fiction is highly influential, even if it's intended to just be a fantasy. It's like if someone wrote offensive material; that material can subconsciously affect people's mindsets. Obviously if someone goes and fucks an animal that's their choice, it's just that providing content for that sort of stuff really just leans into teaching people it's okay and encouraging it when harmful paraphilias like that need therapeutic attention.

I just wanted to share my thoughts in hopes it might spark some good discussion.

Hey, I wanna thank you for having the bravery to send this. These are exactly the kind of conversations I wanna be having with my audience and I can tell you're coming to this conversation in good faith. If anybody is shitty or condescending in the comments of this, I'm going to be very disappointed.

I was also raised in a purity culture (Mormonism) so I know how you feel. When I was a preteen, I stumbled into erotic Warrior Cats rp forums and they excited and intrigued me and made me feel SUPER guilty. I was convinced for years that I had a porn addiction because I would look at smut every couple months when I was feeling horny. I may not have your exact experiences with purity culture but I definitely know what you mean about sex being an uncomfortable topic for you.

In my experience, this is just something that changes with time and exposure to other people and with a willful choice to change your attitudes, if that's something you want to do.

I understand your aversion to adding these sexual references to a fandom that is "for children" but I personally feel like just because a concept was introduced as being aimed at children doesn't mean it should always be. For example, fairy tales were created for children but dark and adult readings of fairy tales are really interesting and can provide some cool angles on the subject matter that keeping it child friendly wouldn't.

I am conscious of the fact that minors may read my work, which is why I use my tagging system and why the top of my blog says "some content may be PG-13". As well, none of the sexual content I write about is stuff that I would feel uncomfortable discussing with someone 13 years old and up. Teens are curious about sex and I think up front and honest conversations about it are really important to avoid the kind of shame and guilt and also misinformation that comes with purity culture and abstinence only education.

I think that in general, fiction is not harmful, but that doesn't mean it can't be harmful to a specific person. For instance, while I think Non/Dub Con fiction is not inherently harmful, someone who has trauma regarding SA might be harmed by reading that kind of thing. It ultimately falls to people to manage their own online experiences. And when it comes to stuff like zoophilia and being worried about normalizing it, that's why I think it's important to discuss how fiction is just that, fiction.

We shouldn't be forced not to write about sensitive topics, but we should engage with them responsibly and foster a culture that discusses this stuff openly and without judgement.

I don't think there's an easy solution to the feelings you're feeling and that's okay! You shared how you feel, I shared how I feel, and we both listened and considered the others' point of view. I hope everyone will stay respectful, thoughtful, open minded, and empathetic when engaging with this discussion. <3

#not art #asks and answers #anon asks

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cripple-punk-dad · 1 year ago

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i hope you don’t mind this but like i’m 14 (not white, trans, gay, that stuff) and seeing a lot of people talk about how a lot of countries are going far right & extremism is coming back in full swing & no rainbow capitalism, etc is kind of scary. how do i like. not be so scared all the time? i just thought you’d know but if this is a weird ask i totally get it

It is scary. It's downright terrifying, looking out into the world and seeing the pattern of hatred, bigotry, and violence that is feels like its only growing more prevalent. Sometimes it feels like I'm on an island in a huge ocean of people who just want me to die, or change who I am, or both.

Not only that, but being 14 is fucking terrifying. You're not an adult yet, so you can't enact 'real change', you can't even drive (in the U.S) so your transportation is limited. You can't (legally) even get a job or anything. The world has done pretty much everything it can to keep you feeling scared. That's really hard to deal with!

This is usually where I'd say something dramatic, like "don't let them get away with that." But that's easier said than done. And that doesn't really answer your question, either. So instead I'll say this: It's hard to be scared when you 1) know your enemy, and 2) have other things to focus on. I don't mean that you should go debate every conservative you see, or even interact with them. But taking the time to understand the ideologies of fascism, alt-right conservatism, TERFS, white supremacists, etc. not only helps you to see how wrong they are, but also how they always fail and will continue to fail. This is also a good time to research and reinforce your own ideologies and beliefs. No one is immune to propaganda, but it's a lot easier to recognize it if you know what you're looking for.

But don't let that consume you. Remember, these people want you to be scared and isolated. If you spend all your time obsessing over everything wrong with the world (which is very easy with social media and the internet) then the people who want you gone will only grow stronger. So it really is a good idea to fight against that by building up a community of friends, and by building yourself up too. What I mean is this: Go outside, look at the ground, find a weird bug you don't know anything about. Read the obituaries in a newspaper. Go dumpster diving. Learn about something that interests you. Write a letter to somebody and never send it (or do). Pick up a weird hobby. You can just start gluing shit together, no one is gonna stop you, there are a lot less rules than you think.

But above all, remember that while history is full of empires collapsing, and wars, and horrors beyond imagination. The fall of Rome didn't happen overnight, it happened over centuries. But even in the midst of all that, people still made art, and had families, and not only survived, but lived fulfilling lives. I promise that you can and will be able to do that too. The sun will continue to shine, the grass will continue to grow, and the Earth will keep on spinning.

#punk #trans #gay #queer

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bunnakit · 1 year ago

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my stand in ep 4 thoughts, feelings, etc

WOW WA WE WAA THAT SURE WAS AN EPISODE HUH - happy to report i went back through the episode slowly this week and took notes and really tried to gather everything i wanted to say (but i will inevitably forget something)

🌸 ok disclaimers because i have a lot of them for this particular episode 🌸

i'm just a silly guy on the internet, i'm not an expert in mental health, psychology, body language, whatever. most days i can't even take care of myself. i'm just saying things recreationally.

PLEASE do not put novel spoilers in my replies, reblogs, or tags without a warning notice. i've got an itchy blocking finger for it these days.

i am treating ming and joe and everyone involved in this show as if they were real life human beings. ming was not born some mustache twirling villain sent from hell to make joe miserable. joe is not some pure angel descended from the clouds to do no wrong. everyone in this show exhibits very human behavior and that can be distressing under certain circumstances. i'm just going to comment on them as humans. i'm not interested in a round table discussion on why a character is irredeemable, the scum of the earth, etc. i'm just putting my thoughts out there and you can take them or leave them.

🌸 alright yucky disclaimer time over 🌸

the episode really just picks us back up where everything left off - and yet joe still made ming breakfast, and ming isn't stupid (well right now at least,) he knows something is off.

i am confused why tong needs to get married on this specific day. and like bro how fast are you getting married? relax. the whole thing is just unstoppable force (trajectory of this producers career) meets immovable object (tong's fuckass stubbornness) and the collateral damage is massive.

and then there's the question of did joe ever want to play a lead? or did he let his impulsiveness and hurt put a target on his back? (only emphasized by the fact that everyone assumed joe would turn down the role)

i DO apologize for all my doubt surrounding wut. he, ja, and may are the only people in this show with any god damn sense. maybe jojo and yim. we'll see.

getting into the confrontation at joe's work, i really don't think it's that surprising when we keep in mind ming genuinely has no fucking clue what is going on. all he knows is joe woke up, was acting weird, didn't come home, and then told him to pack up his shit and leave with ZERO explanation. like, joe's completely in the right, but i'd also be confused as fuck. (i wouldn't go to someone's work about it but, y'know, we know ming acts in extremes.)

and to me this is where it really became obvious that joe has always been able to overpower ming, to get away from him, as we have seen joe's physical prowess, we've seen what he's capable of, but he never uses his body to move ming away from him - that's not who joe is, he's not someone that would put his hands on another person like that. it's just another way ming and joe are the direct antithesis of each other.

it's my thought that the argument escalates because ming is used to getting everything he wants - except for tong, and now joe. when joe begins to push him away and deny him his substitution for tong i think ming lashes out in his hurt with a thought of "it's happening again, why doesn't anyone want me?"

i will say while i do believe sol has good intentions for the most part his white knighting is getting a little irksome. while convenient, it just shows how much he's still hovering and laying in wait for a chance with joe - he, too, is not respecting joe's wishes. no is a complete sentence, sol.

and then things continue back at home and joe finally, finally throws ming's words back at him: if i'm so terrible to be with, if you're so great, why are you wasting your time with me?

and ming doesn't have an answer. what ming DOES have is another back embrace, arms wrapped around joe as he asks "don't you love me anymore?" but is he asking joe or tong?

"although i'm not as good as tong" even now joe's rampant self worth issues are still at play but at least he finally knows he's worth more than whatever this is.

then the phone rings and to me, ming looks skittish. he looks shaken. he's never seen joe so angry and he's scared and as the call progresses that fear morphs into rage when sol calls joe. and the thing is, regardless of who played the main role, ming was never going to be happy. it was either going to be joe or tong playing opposite sol and neither of those things would have been acceptable.

and then i said, out loud, in my quiet office: OH! and promptly lost my shit in the group chat.

ming doesn't look wholly present after his act of violence. his face is vacant, like he isn't completely seeing or grasping what he's just done. i get the impression that ming isn't mentally well; stress and fear and anger have a way of making people do really fucking stupid things and as these things happen you risk falling into the sunk cost fallacy - you've already gone this far, you can't stop now - which all aligns with the obsessive behavior we've seen from ming in the past.

as joe wakes up and they talk once again joe doesn't blame ming, he blames himself for not seeing the writing on the walls even though it was written in invisible ink.

"all these times we were together did you ever love me?"

"you can't tell?"

again, so much of the blame and emotional responsibility of their situationship is put on joe and ming refuses to communicate any of his feelings, perhaps because he doesn't know how to after repressing everything for so long.

WE DIDN'T GET HOT KINKY CHAINED UP SEX THOUGH, WHY DOES GOD HATE ME SPECIFICALLY

but the way joe looks at ming as they linger there in the wake of joe's request looks like a goodbye, the way his eyes soak in every detail of ming's face. despite all of this and the nightmare it has turned into he did love ming, perhaps still does, and he does have some of those good memories he was so desperate to keep.

though like.. joe.... maybe we could consider a different career path??? instead of just jumping to risking our lives? like sure food service sucks, cashiering sucks, etc. but you aren't in danger of falling off any cliffs, you know? and let's be real, he could just go into modeling with those looks.

it's my impression that when ming calls joe he looks haggard, like he's lost numerous nights of sleep (and we really don't know how much time has passed) but either way it does seem like he's at least done some amount of reflecting. his voice comes across soft, subdued, and sincere.

and after everything, back in the present, we see ming. he's still in the apartment, desperately calling joe's name all these years later, still unable to sleep and waiting for joe to come home just like he asked him to years ago.

maybe ming never wanted to enter the entertainment industry before, but he has now. perhaps it was never for the attention or the money, maybe he chose to promote those watches because it was a reminder of the gift from joe. and maybe this job, in this specific industry, is the closest he can feel to joe now. and maybe with new influence and connections ming can find out why he was never able to tell joe he loved him before he lost him.

WHO KNOWS, NOT ME, CAN'T WAIT TO FIND OUT THO

#oat meta #my stand in #my stand in the series #usersasa #clairedaring #i can never find a good place to mention it but in like ep 1 ming knows how joe takes his coffee #after just like 1 day with him so like ming IS paying attention and DOES care for joe #as we see reinforced with his little gifts and the way he went shopping with him and stuff #the things ming does to show his love and care are very blink and you'll miss it #and it's hard for me to squeeze in my thoughts on that between everything else going on

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