#Knee Cap Instability

[torturedtypewritersdept]

omg baby an idea for dr rafe came up to me at work and i'm shksjcnd!!!! okay hear me out<33 reader is at work waitressing and for the last couple days she had that strange stomachache but she didn't really care about it when it suddenly hits her at work (it turns out to be an appendix) and she ends up in the hospital and when rafe sees her at the ER all the flashbacks comes back to him but he tries his best to stay calm to take care of her and be there for her 🤍

BABE <3 NOT ME WANTING TO GET HOME ALL DAY TO WRITE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!! HOPE YOU ENJOY, MY LOVE!

-

The ER doors burst open with a gust of hot air and urgent voices.

The emergency department was loud with the usual noise—overhead pages, squeaking gurney wheels, a child crying somewhere in the pediatric hallway—but Rafe barely registered any of it. His shift was rounding the corner of hour fifteen, and his spine was curved with exhaustion, the tendons in his shoulder aching from an earlier reduction. He hadn’t eaten. He hadn’t sat down. And he sure as hell wasn’t in the mood for small talk.

He was halfway through charting when he heard the commotion.

“Twenty-five-year-old female—acute abdominal pain, febrile, suspected ruptured appendix. Transport was delayed due to emesis and instability—possible septic onset.”

Rafe didn’t even look up at first. The words meant something clinical, standard—he'd heard a thousand variations of them over his years. But then a nurse muttered your name.

And the pen slipped from his hand.

His chair scraped violently against the floor as he stood, already moving, already knowing.

You.

Not a patient. Not a stranger.

His wife.

You—who had just started teaching again, your sweet voice now filtering into the corners of your shared home as you led virtual classes from the kitchen table in oversized sweaters and soft joggers, hair pinned up with one of his old surgical caps. You—who had fought through months of agony and immobility after the accident that nearly took your life. You—who now called him baby when you were half-asleep and Rafe when you were afraid.

He caught a glimpse of you on the gurney and it nearly buckled his knees.

You were curled in on yourself, one hand clutching your lower abdomen, the soft blue knit of your teaching sweater soaked with sweat. Your glasses were crooked. There were tears on your cheeks and vomit crusted near your collar. Your laptop bag had been hastily tossed onto the floor beside the EMT, as if you’d collapsed mid-lesson and someone had simply tried to gather your life in one arm before rushing you here.

His stomach dropped.

It was the accident all over again.

That night; The blood in your hair. The way your body seized in his arms, arching as your heart gave out. The weeks spent hovering between here and gone. The breathless nights where he held you through the pain, praying you'd come back. The memory ripped through him like a blade.

And now—this.

You whimpered as they adjusted your IV. The pain was eating you alive.

Rafe forced himself forward, teeth clenched so tightly his jaw ached. He reached your side, brushing the damp hair from your temple, thumb ghosting across your cheek.

“I’m here,” he whispered, voice thick, steadying himself for you even as his knees trembled beneath the weight of it all. “You’re okay, sweetheart. I’ve got you.”

Your eyes fluttered open—barely. But you found him. You always did.

“Hurts,” you whimpered, and Rafe swallowed hard, nodding.

“I know. Appendix ruptured—we’re going to surgery. I’ll be right there the whole time.”

You groaned, curling tighter, your knees drawn toward your chest.

“S-sorry,” you gasped.

That shattered him. Sorry—like you had done something wrong by hurting. Like your body failing was somehow a burden.

“Hey. No,” he said, firmer now, his forehead pressing to yours. “None of that. You’re going to be okay. We’re going to get through this.”

He glanced at the monitors. Your vitals were slipping—blood pressure bottoming out, heart rate climbing fast. Sepsis was setting in. Fast.

“She’s crashing!” a nurse called out.

And just like that, it was happening again. Too fast. Too much.

He was on the gurney, straddling your body, the curve of your hip digging into his thigh as he began compressions, his palms pressing down hard into the center of your chest. His wedding ring clinked against your sternum with every thrust. He didn’t stop. He couldn’t.

“Come on, baby. Stay with me. Stay.”

He could barely see. Everything blurred—tears or sweat, he couldn’t tell. All he knew was that this was you, his wife, the woman he loved more than life itself, slipping away beneath his hands.

“Not again, please, don't leave me.” he whispered, his voice ragged, haunted. “Not again. Not today.”

They wheeled the two of you into the OR, your body beneath him, your life cracking open all over again—and Rafe holding it in his blood-stained hands, determined not to lose it.

Not to lose you.

-

The ICU was quiet in the way grief is quiet—dim lights humming, machines breathing in rhythm where lungs couldn’t. Somewhere down the hall, a monitor beeped in slow intervals. A nurse whispered something behind the glass. But in room 3B, time had slowed to a crawl.

You were lying in the center of it, pale against the white sheets, your body still trembling beneath the weight of what it had survived. A nasal cannula curled into your nose, pushing oxygen through your system one soft stream at a time. Your wedding ring had been taped to your finger by the nurse after surgery, just beneath the IV port, and your sweater—now bloodstained and cut down the center—had been placed in a biohazard bag outside the room.

The surgery had gone well.

The appendix had ruptured. They’d caught it just in time.

But your body… your beautiful, bruised, stubborn body had gone into shock, and it had taken longer than expected to stabilize your heart rate again. The code Rafe called had been the third of his career—and the second on you.

He hadn’t left your bedside since.

Still in his scrubs—now stained and wrinkled, the collar stretched from where he’d yanked at it in the OR—Rafe sat in the chair beside you, hunched over your arm like a man at the altar of something holy. His head was bowed, eyes closed, fingers loosely wrapped around yours. A bag of saline dripped slowly into your arm above him, its quiet rhythm the only metronome in the room.

He hadn’t spoken in hours. He didn’t need to.

Because in the silence, he was remembering—every word you’d said before the pain took over, every look, every apology you’d never needed to make. The memory of your eyes—glassy and searching for him—burned behind his own. The way your body jerked beneath him as he’d done compressions. The way your lips had parted, trying to say something, anything, before your consciousness gave out.

And he’d been afraid. God, he’d been so afraid.

More than the night of the accident. More than the first time you coded. Because this time you had his last name. You were his. And the idea of living without you—again—was something he couldn’t survive a second time.

“Please wake up, honey,” he whispered, forehead pressing gently to your arm. “You’re okay now. You made it through. Just wake up.”

And as if your soul heard him across whatever threshold it had wandered toward—your fingers twitched.

Barely.

A tremble in the space between sleep and wake.

His eyes snapped up. Your lips parted on a dry breath, eyelashes fluttering.

“Hey,” he breathed, rising to hover over you, his hand moving to your cheek, thumb brushing a smudge of iodine from your skin. “Hey, baby. I’m here.”

You blinked at him, slow and heavy, eyes glazed with pain and confusion.

“Rafe?”

“Yeah. I’ve got you.”

Your brow creased slightly. “It hurts.”

“I know.” His voice cracked. “It’s over now. They got everything. You’re gonna be okay.”

You made a small sound, barely audible, and tears immediately welled in his eyes. He pressed a kiss to your temple, hand cradling the side of your head.

“Shh. Don’t talk yet, just rest. You’re in the ICU. They’ve got you on fluids and antibiotics. I’m staying right here.”

“Did I die?”

“No.” He swallowed, his throat burning. “No, baby. You lived. You fought through again. You’re the strongest goddamn woman I’ve ever seen.”

You smiled faintly—just a flicker of it—and he swore the sun broke through the hospital window when you did.

“I didn’t even get to finish teaching,” you rasped.

A broken laugh left his chest. “Your students can wait. I’m the one who needs you now.”

You squeezed his hand, feeble but real. And he held it like a lifeline, like a promise. Because it was.

He wasn't going anywhere. Not tonight. Not ever.

[writeforfandoms]

Born for Greatness bonus 3

Okay I ended up adding a chapter because this is a gift for a friend

Find the series masterlist

It's that time of the month and the cramps are awful. The pack fusses.

Warnings: Lil bit of panic from the boys, emotional whiplash, emotional instability, cramping, Feelings.

Word count: 1.6k

John was the first to find you curled up on the couch, hugging a heat pad to your abdomen, face twisted in pain. 

“Love?” He crouched in front of you, hands on your knees, trying to make eye contact. “What’s wrong?” 

“Just cramps,” you grit out, trying to breathe slowly. They were bad this month, worse than normal. Much worse. 

Some of his concern cleared, and he lifted one hand to brush your forehead. “Had any painkillers?” 

“An hour ago.” You closed your eyes at the tiny bit of relief he brought just by being there. 

“Not helping?” He murmured sympathetically. 

“Not yet.” You clenched your jaw tight and stopped breathing at another sharp ripple of pain. 

“Here, move forward a bit, love.” John stood and circled around behind you, gently nudging you forward until he had free access to your lower back. He started massaging slowly, taking his time. Just the pressure of those big warm hands on your skin helped, the cramps easing in their intensity. 

“What’s going on?” Gaz asked sharply, more intense than usual. “Who’s hurt?” 

You jumped at the unexpected intrusion and then hissed softly. Oh ouch. 

“At ease,” John grumbled, hands briefly detouring to squeeze your shoulders. “Alright, love?”

“Good enough,” you muttered. “It’s fine, it’ll pass.” 

“Not soon enough.” John huffed softly and resumed massaging your back. 

Gaz put things together quickly, because he was smart. He also dropped down in front of you, frowning with concern. “Want some tea?” 

You smiled, small and tight, trying to hide your pain again. Despite the fact that you knew it was far too late for that. “Only if it’s no trouble.” 

“Not for you.” He stood again and started working on tea. (You’d known getting an electric kettle for the pack room was a good idea, and mentally congratulated past-you.) 

You breathed out slowly, the cramps lessening as John continued massaging your lower back and hips. “Not that I want you to leave,” you started slowly, pausing to grimace at another clench of pain, “but don’t you have to go do Captain-y things?” 

John huffed softly in amusement, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of your head. “I’ll worry about it later,” he rumbled. “Don’t fret, love.”

“Don’t fret, he says to the person whose job it is to fret,” you muttered, grinning to yourself when you saw Gaz’s shoulders jump with a stifled laugh. 

“Here.” Gaz held out the tea to you, hovering even after you’d taken it. Clearly he was unwilling to leave just yet. 

“Thanks.” You took a sip. Perfect. 

“Cap?” Soap called from down the hall, footsteps approaching fast. 

“In here,” John said, speaking normally. “Everything’s fine.” 

About three seconds later, Soap stopped next to the couch, looking between the three of you. He blinked and then muttered a little “oh”. 

“Soap,” you started before he could say anything. “I love you but if you say anything I might deck you.”

“Rog.” He grinned, opting instead to plop down next to you and cuddle into your side. You relaxed a little, the heat of him and John and the heat pack all working to ease the cramps to something more manageable. 

Relief had you going near-limp, leaning back (and not even apologizing as you trapped John’s hands) with a little sigh. “Finally,” you grumbled, eyes sliding closed. 

“Hungry, love?” John didn’t try to free himself yet, just moved a bit to be more comfortable. 

You made a face, shaking your head. “Definitely not.” 

John hummed acknowledgement, glancing down at where Soap was still cuddled up against you. “Gonna take it easy today?” 

“I think if I try anything otherwise, I won’t get very far,” you admitted with a sigh. 

“Good.” He pressed another kiss to the top of your head before he pulled his arms free. “Sure you don’t want anything?”

“I’m sure.” You tipped your head back further to smile at him. “That helped.” 

John nodded once, though you could see he was thinking about something. His gaze went from you to Soap to Gaz (still hovering by the minifridge) back to you.

You decided to save him the trouble. “Yes, I know you have to work. Yes, one of them can stay with me. No, I have no preference which. No, I will not shout at anyone.” You paused. “Probably.” You paused again. “At least I will do my very best not to.” 

John looked very briefly chagrined but then smoothed out his expression and nodded. “Good,” he murmured. “I’ll check in for lunch, how’s that?” 

“That’s fine,” you agreed, ignoring the looks Soap and Gaz sent each other. “No setting your paperwork on fire.”

John heaved the biggest sigh known to man and turned around, but not before you saw his lips twitch in a grin. “That was once,” he grumbled on his way out. 

“Drink your tea,” Gaz said, making his way over to the two of you. “Gotta go deal with recruits.”

“Don’t scare them too much,” you joked, grinning up at him. 

He rolled his eyes but still leaned down to rub his cheek against the top of your head. And ruffle Soap’s mohawk playfully, dodging out of the way and leaving with a cackle while Soap swore at him. 

“Movie time?” Soap asked after he’d settled back down again, having somehow managed to contort himself so he was half-curled around you. 

“Mmhm.” You picked up the remote, flipping through options. 

You two managed a fairly peaceful couple hours. Soap got a little antsy, which didn’t surprise you. He wasn’t used to being inactive, especially first thing. 

“You can go for a run,” you murmured to him after you finished the first movie. “I’ll be fine.” 

He shook his head a little. “‘S fine,” he murmured, even as he fidgeted. 

“Seriously. Go.” You nudged him. “I think I’m gonna go get a book, anyway.” 

He wavered until you stood, leaving your now-cool heat pack on the couch. “Ye sure?”

“I’m sure,” you said, flapping your hands in a shooing motion. “Go. Get some energy out.” 

He nodded and left, and you hummed as you went back to your room to retrieve your book and your meds. Because you were definitely not skipping a dose today. 

The couple hours of quiet reading time to yourself helped, as did more meds. As promised, John brought lunch to you, and the two of you had a quiet meal. 

You tried very hard to tamp down your fraying temper. You even managed it.

Until the afternoon. 

You breathed in deep, pain once again battering you, temper entirely too short, energy levels too low to do something like climb up on the roof. 

“Gaz,” you started, closing your eyes. “You do not need to hover.” 

He paused, in the middle of hovering. And took a step back. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine.” You grimaced when that came out too short. “It’s not you, I’m just…” You trailed off, not sure how to put it into words. The general discomfort, the pain, the short temper because of everything else. 

“Got it.” To his credit, Gaz just nodded once, stepping away to flip on the kettle again before pulling out his phone. You sighed softly, frustrated with yourself on top of everything else now. 

But Gaz didn’t seem to be upset. He brought you tea a few minutes later, checked his phone one more time, nodded to himself, and smiled at you. “One of us’ll bring you dinner, yeah? Text if you need anything.” 

And then he left quietly. 

You were so relieved you could almost cry, and so disgusted with yourself for being so relieved that you did cry, just a little bit. You were a terrible person. 

But you had silence and the pack room to yourself for a little while. Which was great, up until it wasn’t. You ended up hunched over yourself, feeling terrible, trying to push the heat pack into your skin until it almost burned. 

A soft chuff pulled your head up and you squinted at the cheetah in front of you. “Ghost? You need something?” 

He chuffed again and nudged your arm with his nose. When you just blinked at him, confused, he chuffed a third time and shoved his head under your chest, physically pushing you. You let him and eventually got the hint, laying flat on the couch. 

He promptly hopped up and draped himself across you. His purr rumbled pleasantly against your skin, the vibration far more soothing for your cramps than you would have guessed. Within minutes, you were completely relaxed under him, moving only to push a pillow under your head. He continued purring, louder now. 

You didn’t stand a chance against that. 

You woke slowly, groggy and disoriented, to John leaning over you with a little smile. “How’re you feelin’, love?” He kept his voice quiet. 

You blinked a few times. “Groggy,” you muttered. “Better. Doesn’t hurt.” You started to stretch and quickly realized you couldn’t, because you still had a cheetah on you. 

“You want dinner?” 

You made a face. “Not hungry,” you grumbled, wiggling one hand free to scratch through Ghost’s little ruff of fur. His purring got louder, which you hadn’t thought possible. 

“Alright.” John leaned down enough to kiss you, soft and sweet, before he turned the TV on low, settling next to you. You hummed softly, content, your fingers curling lazily in Ghost’s fur.

You had no idea when you fell asleep, but you woke up to John snoring softly, leaned back on the couch with his hat over his face and Ghost still laying on you as a cheetah. A quick look showed Gaz and Soap, both shifted, laying near John’s feet. 

You smiled and closed your eyes again. Couldn’t hurt to get a little more sleep.

[lost-spoons]

I use mobility aids such as forearme crutches and braces on my ankles and knees. The ankle ones hold up well (they're a wrapping type with a single point of velcro at the end of the wrap) and I've only had to replace them 1 time so far, but my knee braces have been replaced 3 or 4 times already, due to over working the velcro.

The type I currently use is a Moxita knee braces with side stabilizers. It does what I need it to do but needs to be replaced often. The reason for the velcro stripping that happens to them is because I have to take them off when I'm sitting or have my knees bent for a long period of time, and anytime I want to stand I need to put them back on.

I use the braces for patella instability. My crutches help to lessen the amount of weight I put on them, but without the brace stability, I can't stand without my knees buckling and the knee cap sliding out of place.

I refuse to get surgery for this as the issue will reappear over and over due to the genetic condition.

So, does anyone have any recommendations on knee braces?

[kotaromita]

Im stealing your knee caps. woosshh…

ow crap i am experiencing instability and pain while standing and walking!!!! :(

[unsoundedcomic]

Truly the twin banes of 'I never thought they would go this far!' and 'it seemed like a good idea at the time!' have taken a bat to the metaphorical knee caps of many a supposedly well thought out plan. Also, I thought queen Sonorie didn't meet Roger the grandiose Aldish martyr until after she had already become queen?

The Foi-Hellick Affair was going strong long before she met Roger, so she was still bound by his (or perhaps more accurately Mallory's) machinations. She never had much opportunity to shape her own reign or pursue her own agenda. Instead she had this amazing opportunity thrust into her lap with the Coppers and the Etalarche curse; she had to decide if she'd use it or not. That choice influenced a lot of her life. It wasn't entirely fair, she thinks, and she's done the best with it that she could. Bell's increasing hostility and instability only made it all worse, and Ruckmearkha is the icing on the shit-cake. The efheby is not only impossibly dangerous, but he took her co-conspirator away. Roger's gone. She has to finish this on her own. Or fail and look like an utter monster and fool.

Everyone on this page knew exactly what open wound to jam their finger in.

[osiiiris]

South of Heaven - Part II [IYRIN spin off - Terzo x OC]

Rating: Explicit, nsfw, sex, mental health issues, abuse, religious trauma, lemon, mental instability, mind manipulation, explicit language, biblical imaginary, violent couple fight, blood and injuries, violence, crossover fic.

Pairing: Papa Emeritus III / OC, Cardinal Copia / OC, Papa Emeritus III / Omega (mention), Alpha / OC (mention).

Crossover: Ghost/Metallica.

Summary: A group of rival satanists attacks the Ministry. Iyrin, now a fallen Angel, is struggling with their new demonic condition, and things between them and Papa Emeritus III are not going as they both expected. Terzo’s revenge against the rival satanists during a Metallica concert only makes things worse.

The main story, IYRIN, is on Wattpad and AO3.

This spin off chapter, The New Inner Circle, is on Wattpad, AO3 and down here 👇🏻

Part II. The Master and the Puppets.

"Does he know what the Ministry is about, beside the music?" 

Terzo looked distractedly out of the van window as it moved on the road to the venue. “James is an honorary member of the Clergy, one of our top donors,” he answered. “He knows what we do.” 

Iyrin just nodded.

There were at least twenty ghouls with them, divided into two vans. To make everyone recognizable but still not making it too obvious, they were all wearing black pants and hoodies, caps up, and the same kerchief to cover half their face. Only the eyes were showing, while on Terzo, they were covered by blind sunglasses, despite the darkness. Iyrin just wore one of his Ride the Lightning shirts and black, tight pants, like all the others, with a black long-sleeved shirt under it to cover their skin. Terzo has chosen a Master of Puppets shirt and a knee-long black coat that Iyrin had found a bit too fancy for a metal concert.

"I’m going to meet dear old friends, better be presentable," Terzo had replied before guiding them out of the room with a hand strategically placed on their butt.

All of them wore the Crucifix pin on their chest. If the New Inner Circle intended to find them, they should have known what to look for.

In front of them, a pair of eyes scrutinized them, dressed like that they couldn’t tell which ghoul was; the shiny, black eyes were the only uncovered body parts.

The first time Iyrin had clearly seen the face of a Ghoul unmasked, the image of it had haunted them for days. It was on the occasion of a threesome Terzo had organized, since the attraction between Iyrin and the Ghouls had grown exponentially with the fallen Angel conversion, and he just saw the opportunity in that. After all, it had always been a recurrent fantasy of his to see his Angel fucked by his ghouls.

Terzo had barely prepared them to what a Ghoul looks like without the mask, just mentioning it would have been something unexpected, but the moment they saw, they understood immediately why it was forbidden to them to unmask publicly on Earth in that form.

When the Ghoul removed the metal mask, what they saw was something that took a bit for their brain to register.

It was their face. 

The Ghoul had their appearance, only darkened and sharpened - feminized or masculine depending on the ghoul gender, they learned with experience - eyes as black as the night, not a single emotion recognizable in that pitch black. The only demons they had seen before were on Earth, incarnated in regular human bodies, unrecognizable by other humans if not for their actions. That form was something to be seen only in places once forbidden to them.

“Terzo…” they had called, to make sure what they were looking at was what they were thinking. “What do you see?” 

Terzo grabbed their waist from behind, his chin resting on their shoulder. “I see myself.” And, in his vision, the Ghoul's image reflected his face, looking at him. “Everybody has their own demons, even if the demon is you,” Terzo had explained later. It was an illusion, a proof of strength to look in the eyes of your own sins incarnated. 

“Nobody knows you better than me,” the Ghoul had said and succeeded in giving them the best sex of their life. 

Fucking with someone, or more than one at times, with his appearance was Terzo’s ultimate narcissistic vice. To have group sex with Iyrin and the Ghouls just added a new twist to it. The van stopped, bringing Iyrin’s mind back into the vehicle.

James Hetfield greeted them—or, better, the Papa—with overflowing joy the moment he stepped into the resting room, followed by his army of ghouls.

“Ah, my Papa! My man!” he exclaimed with his strong voice and a contagious smile, immediately reaching for Terzo, who greeted him with open arms and a slight smile on his face. James wrapped an arm around his shoulders, “How are you, motherfucker?” and the vigorous pat he gave to Papa's stomach made him bend and cough a little. Terzo took his hand to gently move it away from him, jiggling like nothing happened. “So good to see you, my dear friend,” he responded, but before he could add anything else, James had already dragged him around the room, exclaiming “Let’s give a few beers to these thirsty boys!” offering his own to Terzo. Americans. 

The musician ghouls quickly paired with their corresponding Metallica members to discuss musicians' stuff, while Iyrin was immediately intercepted by Lars Ulrich, approaching them with a beer in his hands. 

“Hey, are you a friend, a fan, or…?” 

“I’m with Papa and the guys,” they answered. “I only know a few songs of yours, but the ones I know are really cool,” they concluded, nodding with a little smile.

“And… Do you play any instrument…?”

“Yes, the harp.”

“The harp, fuck, wow, that’s dope. Fucking cool.” He looked quite impressed, maybe too much for such a simple answer. The last thing Terzo heard from Lars was, “Have you ever tried the drums…?” before losing track of them.

The reunion was a joyful one. Metallica had been big supporters of Ghost since Primo had taken the lead, making James an always-welcomed guest at the Ministry. Terzo took a few minutes to discuss with him about a "question to solve" that would probably cause a bit of a mess in the pit. James reassured him that whatever happened would slip under the voice "incident." 

“Where is Iyrin?” he asked Omega at some point, but the ghoul just mentioned having seen them and the drummer ghoul exiting the resting room with Lars. They found them in the rehearsal room, with Iyrin sitting at the drums and Lars and the drummer Ghouls at their sides, apparently trying to teach them some basics of the instrument.

The drummer ghoul was standing near, trying to impress Lars with his knowledge about the instrument.

Iyrin gave a clumsy beat on the drum, smiling amused at his direction. “Have you seen?!” they asked with a high-pitched voice, proud of themselves.

“We need to go,” Terzo said, waiting at the door.

When they went out, he turned to give a last, squinted eyes look to Lars, who responded with the same squinted eyes.

He never really liked Lars. On the other hand, Lars never really liked him.

**

The venue may have been small by the band's standards, but it was still an arena with too many people and chaos. The strategy was to focus almost all efforts on the pit. According to Terzo’s expectations, if a bunch of fanatical Satanists were at a concert, they would most likely be in the pit, but he had instructed two ghouls per ring just in case. He and Iyrin would keep an eye on the whole situation from the first ring.

“No violence until we are out of here, ok?” Terzo made them promise. “Do we all have beers?” he then asked, looking at all the ghouls raising their beer bottles, “… and ice tea.” he had to add, looking at Iyrin raising their ice lemon tea. “You come with me,” he then said to them, moving towards the stairs that led to the rings. However, the Grigori’s attention was immediately captured by a strange void formed in the middle of the pit by the audience.

“Oh, look, it’s empty here. We can just go to the front!” they innocently considered, quietly walking through the open space, sipping from the straw. They didn’t notice Terzo looking and moving in the opposite direction, losing sight of them.

People around them started to move, and they heard a voice calling for them but couldn’t determine the direction. Someone yelled, “Do you want to die, doll?” from a distance, but Iyrin didn’t realize he was referring to them. The music started to stomp again, and more people began to jump and roam in the open space.

The voice called again, closer, and right when the music started in full force and the two sides of the audience ran towards each other, Iyrin felt a grab on their arm, pulling them away from that bedlam just in time to avoid getting smashed by the mob.

“What the fuck were you doing there?!”

Iyrin looked at Terzo, confused, then at the Ghouls that had grabbed them, throwing himself into the mosh pit. “What was that?”

“A fucking wall of death.”

“A what?!”

“Something I don’t allow at my concerts… and people like you are exactly the reason why.” Terzo just brought them to the stairs, directed to the first ring.

“I didn’t know concerts could be so dangerous,” they considered, looking back once more, “Where are the other ghouls?” Terzo just gestured with his head at the mosh pit formed under them, beyond the balcony rail. “There,” he replied, as if it was an obvious thing.

The ghouls were literally ruling the mosh pit, firing everybody up with their energy and screams, singing with their fists in the air, inciting and gathering people and pushing them away to start fights. They analyzed every person they could focus on in those short contacts.

“Well, they’re having fun.”

“I think it reminds them of home.” Terzo looked proud. Looking at the pit above them, his hands on the rails, he looked like Lucifer glancing into the abyss of Hell.

Then, Sad But True started to play, and Iyrin’s face burst into a wide smile. “Our song!” They chirped, looking at Terzo, who was smiling with sealed lips himself.

That was one of the songs he had dedicated to them in one of their tender moments. 

He encircled Iyrin in a tantalizing half-embrace, their back resting against him while his hands gripped the barrier with a subtle intensity as he leaned in to murmur the lyrics into their ear.

I'm your dream, make you real

I'm your eyes when you must steal

I'm your pain when you can't feel…

They nestled in the comfort of that twisted serenade and the tender embrace of Terzo, an unusual sanctuary of tranquility amidst the cacophony of screaming fans.

When the Ghouls looked up to them from the pit, they were even closer. Terzo's hands gripped Iyrin's butt firmly, drawing them impossibly close. They were now facing each other, hips pressing together, engaged in a sensual dance. Iyrin leaned back against the railing, responding to Terzo's movements in a way too explicit to most. As their lips parted from a lingering, lascivious kiss, his tongue was kept between their smiling teeth. With a shared mischievous gaze, they dove back into another kiss.

"Terzo and Iyrin are out of the game," one of them declared to the others. 

"Better. Let’s have some fun by ourselves," another replied, promptly diving back into the mosh pit. Upon looking up again, the couple was not there anymore.

Later, in the venue's restroom, Iyrin emerged from one of the cabins with weak legs and a faint pink tint on their cheeks. Glancing briefly at the mirror above the sink while washing their hands, the door swung open, revealing a long-haired young man no older than twenty.

He paused, visibly surprised at the sight of them. The moment they locked eyes, Iyrin felt a surge of memories flooding back into them; images of him writing on paper, laughter echoing in the background, a knife, a cat's final meow, and flames all around.

"Terzo?" they hesitated, breaking the connection with a quick blink.

Terzo just stepped out of the same cabin, adjusting his pants, looking at them with a puzzled expression.

"He's one of them."

**

Finding the other four hadn’t been difficult once they caught the first one. Before the Papa, Iyrin, and twenty ghouls, there were five young boys, all in their twenties or even younger, kneeling and immobilized by a ghoul each.

“It’s only the five of you?” Terzo asked, surprised and slightly disappointed. “That’s it?”

“We have the Devil at our back, we don’t need people.”

“Ah, I can assure you don’t,” Terzo smirked at their foolishness. “Do you know who I am?” He leaned down to the guy in the middle, taking off his glasses. The mismatched eyes looked straight into the boy’s.

“Yeah, a fucking faggot,” he only said, signing his death sentence by spitting in Terzo's face.

Terzo took it calmly, retrieving a tissue from his chest pocket. “You know, on another occasion, I would have appreciated it, but unfortunately, this is not such an intimate setting. But I will give you something else I equally appreciate with the right partners,” he teased, cleaning himself. Iyrin recalled that same teasing attitude Terzo used with them the first night they met in his office. Then, addressing the ghouls, he ordered, “Could you please slap this gentleman for me?”

One of the ghouls approached, slapping the boy with the back of his hand so hard Iyrin flinched next to Papa. 

“Again,” Terzo said, gesturing with his hand, “again, and again, and again until I tell you to stop.” He added at each slap, now becoming punches and kicks on different parts of the boy's body, leaving him out of breath at some point. “Also the other four, we don’t want them to feel excluded, eh?” He added, and soon the whole pack of ghouls was on the five immobilized boys.

“You think you did a favor to Satan by desecrating what I hold sacred… my Ministry and the life of my felines.” Terzo started to talk with a composed voice, but soon his expression and tone became harsher, “But what you fool, filthy stupid kids do not understand is that Satanism is a relentless pursuit of balance and justice, and it is what I seek to restore tonight. This is the night you learn that actions always carry consequences.”

Iyrin was standing next to Terzo, the only two not taking part in the beating. “I think that’s enough,” they tried to say after a few minutes, but Terzo seemed deaf to their call. “Terzo… please stop it.” They tried again; the worry was starting to make their voice tremble.

One of the boys leaned face down, spitting blood from the mouth and nose, falling almost unconscious, but that only seemed to embitter the ghouls and pleasure the Pontiff. “Terzo, please…” they tried again, touching his arm and darting their eyes from him to the massacre they were witnessing. “Stop it!”

“Shut up, Iyrin,” he only said, unfazed. They could see his eyes flashing red under the glasses.

“You’re killing them! Stop it!” they were now screaming out of desperation, but the only thing they got back was an annoyed expression. “Stop them!”

“Alright, that’s enough,” he finally commanded, when all five boys stopped moving on the ground.

The ghouls all took a step back when Iyrin rushed to kneel next to the first boy they could reach, mercifully caressing his blood-covered face to assess the damage inflicted. They turned to Terzo, looking at him in horror, but he only ordered the ghouls to go back to the vans.

The way back to the Ministry was a silent one.

**

“You read articles about me? How sweet of you.”

“You literally send magazines to everyone’s room whenever there is an article about Ghost,” Iyrin responded laconically.

They went back to the Ministry looking like they were returning from a war. Blood was splattered on almost all of the ghouls, including Iyrin’s hands and face, though not from beating the boys. They walked together in the abbey in silence, and at some point, the Grigori just parted and took the way to their room without a word. By the time they got out of the shower, they found Terzo sitting on their couch, reading one of their magazines.

“It’s good keeping everybody informed on the band's success,” he replied, proud. “They talk about me as a sex symbol, have you seen?”

Terzo observed their bare back as they moved past him. The wings drawn on their back had lost their golden reflection to be swallowed by the dark feathers that now covered half their back. If manifested in their spiritual form, they would probably spread as the shiny, black as night wings of a crow. Perhaps for that, or the way they moved in their dark habits, often adorned with black feathers, they had soon gained the nickname Raven in the Ministry.

They just went to the wardrobe, checking their night robes. Most of them were chosen and bought by Terzo himself, or custom-made with his direction. He knew each piece very well.

“I like that red one on you.” But as he spoke, Iyrin just put it back to take a black one. Terzo smirked at that spite. “I also love that black one.” He commented again, even more amused to see their expression hardening. When passing near him again, he tried to reach for their hand.

“DON’T touch me.” The Angel pulled it back, putting a particular emphasis on the “don’t.”

Terzo’s expression went serious. “You’re still too soft.”

“And you’re a monster,” they replied with a raspy tone. In the end, they settled for a Nightwish t-shirt and comfortable pants.

Terzo sighed, looking away, slightly annoyed. That wasn’t the first time he had heard that word from them.

“What did you want me to do? To cordially invite them for tea in the Abbey?” He asked with a hint of irony. “They tried to burn down my fucking Ministry and killed one of my cats. They’re fucking lucky they’re still alive.”

“So you meant to kill them? To teach them what? Maybe they’ll do it again; they will look for revenge,” they tried to reflect. “That’s what violence creates: more violence.”

“Nice sermon, but you know what? I don’t fucking care,” he just replied. “They tried to emulate those assholes of the Inner Circle, but they forgot the price they all paid for playing with the devil so foolishly.” He gestured, pointing at his side as if the boys were in the room. “At their age, I already learned the hard way you can’t play with this stuff; they will too.”

“You really scare me sometimes.”

“Ah, finally. Welcome to Hell.”

“That’s what you want? What do you base your papacy on? Terror and sex preaching?”

“Oh, please do not bring my speeches on stage or the 'He Is' video story back…”

“That video really was the last straw.”

“That was a fucking parody!” he said with a loud tone. That was enough to bring silence for a while, with Iyrin sitting on the bed, avoiding looking at him. When he spoke again, his tone went sadly quiet.

“Do you know what I liked the most about you? Your smile,” he unexpectedly said. For a moment, he sounded and looked almost resigned. “You were always smiling. This little blonde cute thing going around bringing joy and peace, smiling even when we fucked… it was lovely, my lovely dove, so lovely that I can't wrap my head around the fact that all of a sudden you just decided not to smile anymore and to dedicate your new existence in the pursuit of deeply, tirelessly, perpetually fucking piss me off!” The rage in his voice increased with each word, cracking again the sweet expression that was progressively softening Iyrin’s face. “Why don't you smile, my little dove? Tell me,” he approached them to force a smile on their face, pulling up the angles of their lips with his thumbs. “Come on, let me see these cute lips curl up, come on.” But when he released his fingers from that fake smile, their lips immediately went back down to an irritated expression. Terzo growled with frustration.

“You reap what you sow, Terzo.”

“Here we go, it's always my fault. E che cazzo*.”

“You made a promise before my ritual, made many. I don’t see you committing any of them!”

“Yeah, because I’m a fucking liar, right?” He opened his arms again “I’m a manipulator, I only use you, I’m always drunk, I only care about myself, I’m not a good leader…” he counted each description on his fingers, like a list he perfectly knew by memory, “If you think all this of me then why the fuck did you come back here?!”

Iyrin stared at him, and by the way their face contorted, he could sense they were going to shoot their last bullet. “You know what?” they started, indeed, “Maybe what your mother said was true. Maybe I made a mistake with trading my holiness for this!”

Terzo stood up, walking toward them “Ah, si? Well in times like this I really empathize with your father and why he fucking sent all of you to Hell at once,” he went even closer to their face “because I swear to you I’m THIS close to sending you there myself.”

Iyrin withdrew, looking at him with revulsion, “…And you get offended when I call you a monster.”

“Please do not say a fucking single word more.”

“You promised me this was a safe place for me…”

“Iyrin…”

“You said that nothing was going to hurt me anymore but you are the one always hurting me!”

“Iyr-“

“You KNOW that I became this because of you! If I ran away from Heaven was becau-”

“Enough!” Terzo shouted, covering their voice and getting dangerously close, a finger pointed to their direction. “Don’t say it! DO NOT SAY IT. You ran away from Heaven with your own legs, wings or whatever the hell you used to get out of there, don’t try playing this game with me again, accusing me of your own choices.” He started to stressfully pace around the room, like a caged lion, then quickly turned toward them again. “Out.” he only said, pointing to the door “Out of my room.”

“This is MY room!”

“Out of YOUR room then!” he shouted, starting to push them “I don’t want to see you for… 12 fucking hours. Fuck off.”

He grabbed their arm and pulled them to the door while Iyrin tried to escape his grip, even holding on to furniture and the doorstep, pulling down whatever object they could reach and growling against him. “Let me go!” they screamed while struggling to free themselves, but Terzo was strong enough to intercept their arms frantically moving and immobilize them while carrying them out, chaotically mumbling curses like “You little beast sent from Hell to test my killing instincts…”

With a last push, Terzo managed to push them out of the room, promptly shutting the door behind them. Iyrin quickly turned to try to open the door again but it was already locked.

“Open!” They screamed again, hysterically beating on the door with both hands, until it was clear he wasn’t going to let them in again. “I HATE YOU!” they screamed so strongly that their voice echoed throughout the corridor. They sighed dramatically, just turned and slid down, with their back against the door, till they sat down and embraced their legs; they rested their head on their knees, so close to crying out of frustration.

“He kicked you out.”

Alpha was leaning by the wall, only partially visible through the shadows of the corridor.

“He kicked me out.” they sadly echoed. “Of my own room… Did you hear everything?”

“I’d have done the same.” he just shrugged “You really are a pain in the ass, you know that?”

Iyrin rested their head on their knees again, looking away. “You always have something nice to say, uh?”

When Alpha was their guard, he didn’t have that name yet. Iyrin discovered it after their return to the Ministry, meeting him in the corridor.

“Sparrow?” He had called, surprised, walking in their opposite direction “What the fuck are you doing here again?”

And they just said “Iyrin.” to the ghoul “My name is Iyrin.”

“Mine is Alpha now.” he had just replied, making the Angel tilt their head in surprise.

Alpha. “I like it.” They simply commented, “Really sounds like a start.”

“Well, time for revenge?” Back to the present, the ghoul moved closer “…Wanna fuck?”

“We fuck all the time Alpha, that’s not a revenge.”

They both turned at the clash of something metallic hitting the wall, followed by a muffled moan: Cardinal Copia had just crashed against a wall with his trike.

Iyrin raised one eyebrow, interested. A tiny smirk formed on their lips. “Do you know what would be a very good revenge…?”

__________

Notes:

*E che cazzo: What The fuck.

Three things: 1 - This chapter is the reason why I used the "Abuse" rating. The fight between Terzo and Iyrin is not intended to be an act of abuse at all, but I know some may be triggered by its dynamic so I wanted to play safe. 2 - Yes, here I introduce one of my 2 headcanons for the Ghouls: the one where they represent the demon inside each one of us. It is personally my favorite depiction of the Devil, the one so perfectly represented in lyrics like Sympathy for the Devil. It may sound confusing and weird to know they have sex with someone who resembles themselves but, hey, do we really want to judge what happens in a satanic Ministry? 3 - Nobody likes Lars 😔

Out of curiosity: what was the most dangerous concert you've attended? Mine, to my own, big surprise, was Goran Bregović last year. It was WIIILD.

[orthodocreet]

Best Knee Arthroscopy Surgery in Kolkata – Get Advanced Keyhole Surgery by Dr. Reet Mukhopadhyay for Effective Knee Pain Management!

Knee pain can significantly affect your daily life, limiting mobility and causing discomfort during routine activities. If you’re suffering from persistent knee issues that do not respond to conservative treatments, Knee Arthroscopy Surgery in Kolkata offers an effective, minimally invasive solution to diagnose and treat various knee problems.

One of the top specialists in this field is Dr. Reet Mukhopadhyay, known for his expertise in advanced arthroscopic procedures that ensure precise treatment, quicker recovery, and minimal downtime. Whether you’re dealing with torn ligaments, cartilage damage, or meniscal tears, Dr. Mukhopadhyay’s skillful approach can help restore your knee function and relieve pain.

What Is Knee Arthroscopy?

Knee arthroscopy is a minimally invasive surgical technique that allows doctors to visualize, diagnose, and treat problems inside the knee joint using a small camera called an arthroscope. Unlike traditional open surgery, arthroscopy requires only tiny incisions, reducing the risk of infection, pain, and scarring.

This procedure is widely used to treat various knee conditions such as:

Torn meniscus (cartilage)

Damaged ligaments (ACL, PCL)

Loose bone or cartilage fragments

Inflamed or damaged joint lining (synovium)

Knee cap (patella) problems

Benefits of Knee Arthroscopy Surgery in Kolkata

Opting for Knee Arthroscopy Surgery in Kolkata offers multiple advantages:

Minimally invasive: Small incisions mean less tissue damage and faster healing.

Precision treatment: The camera provides a clear view of the knee’s interior, enabling accurate diagnosis and targeted repair.

Reduced pain and swelling: Compared to open surgery, patients experience less discomfort post-operation.

Quicker recovery: Most patients return to normal activities within weeks, not months.

Outpatient procedure: Many arthroscopies are performed as day surgeries, allowing you to go home the same day.

Why Choose Dr. Reet Mukhopadhyay for Knee Arthroscopy Surgery in Kolkata?

Dr. Reet Mukhopadhyay is a trusted orthopedic surgeon specializing in knee arthroscopy surgery. With years of experience and a patient-focused approach, he ensures every patient receives personalized care tailored to their specific condition. His use of the latest surgical techniques and advanced equipment guarantees safe procedures with optimal outcomes.

Patients under Dr. Mukhopadhyay’s care benefit from comprehensive consultations where the treatment plan is explained clearly, addressing all concerns and expectations. His commitment to follow-up care ensures that patients receive proper rehabilitation guidance, crucial for long-term knee health.

Who Is a Candidate for Knee Arthroscopy?

Knee arthroscopy is suitable for patients experiencing:

Persistent knee pain or swelling

Locking or catching sensations in the knee

Knee instability or weakness

Limited range of motion

Injuries from sports, accidents, or wear and tear

If conservative treatments such as physical therapy, medications, or injections fail to relieve your symptoms, arthroscopy may be the next best step.

What to Expect During the Procedure?

During knee arthroscopy surgery, Dr. Mukhopadhyay makes small incisions around your knee and inserts the arthroscope. Using specialized surgical instruments, he repairs or removes damaged tissue. The entire process typically takes 30 to 60 minutes, and you may be under local, regional, or general anesthesia.

Post-surgery, you’ll be monitored briefly before discharge, with instructions on pain management, wound care, and exercises to aid recovery.

Book Your Appointment Today

Don’t let knee pain restrict your life. Experience expert care with Knee Arthroscopy Surgery in Kolkata by Dr. Reet Mukhopadhyay, combining advanced techniques with compassionate treatment.

Schedule your consultation today and take the first step toward pain-free movement and improved knee health.

[dog-braces]

Understanding Why Dogs May Develop Knee Pain

Imagine this: You and your dog are playing in the yard, tossing the ball back and forth. Suddenly, your dog slows down, favoring one leg. You think it’s nothing serious at first, but when it continues over the next few days, you start to worry. Could it be dog knee pain? It's a common issue that many dog owners face, yet the causes often remain misunderstood. Your dog’s discomfort could stem from several underlying issues, and today, we’ll dive into why dogs develop knee pain and what you can do to help, including the role of dog knee braces.

Common Causes of Dog Knee Pain

Knee pain in dogs is surprisingly common, particularly as they age. One of the leading causes of dog knee pain is a condition called luxating patella. This occurs when the patella (knee cap) slips out of its normal position, causing the knee to move abnormally and resulting in pain and instability. In fact, studies show that luxating patella affects about 7-8% of dogs, especially small breeds like Chihuahuas and Pomeranians, though it can affect larger dogs as well. The condition can be congenital or develop due to trauma or wear over time.

Another common culprit of dog knee pain is cranial cruciate ligament (CCL) rupture. The CCL is a ligament that stabilizes the knee joint. When it tears or ruptures, it can cause significant pain and often leads to arthritis if not properly treated. It's estimated that around 20% of dogs with knee pain suffer from CCL injuries, with large breeds such as Labradors and Rottweilers being particularly vulnerable.

Arthritis is another major contributor to dog knee pain. Like humans, dogs can develop osteoarthritis, which is the gradual degeneration of joint cartilage. It’s one of the most common causes of pain in older dogs, and as dogs live longer lives, this issue is becoming increasingly prevalent. A study from the Journal of Veterinary Internal Medicine found that over 60% of dogs aged 7 years and older show signs of arthritis, particularly in weight-bearing joints like the knees.

Less Common Causes of Dog Knee Pain

While most sources talk about luxating patella and CCL injuries, there are a few lesser-known causes of dog knee pain. For example, infections or tumors affecting the knee can lead to discomfort and swelling, though these are rarer occurrences. Infections, such as Lyme disease caused by ticks, can result in joint pain that mimics arthritis. Similarly, certain types of bone cancer, such as osteosarcoma, can cause swelling and pain in the knee, especially in larger dogs.

Additionally, some dogs suffer from hip dysplasia, which can cause secondary knee pain. In dogs with poor hip joint development, the misalignment can affect the knee’s mechanics, leading to strain and pain over time. It’s important to consider the full body mechanics when diagnosing knee pain, as a problem in one joint can sometimes lead to issues in others.

Treatment Options for Dog Knee Pain

When your dog experiences dog knee pain, it’s essential to act quickly to manage the discomfort and prevent further damage. One option that has gained popularity among pet owners is the dog knee brace. A dog knee brace can provide stability, reduce pain, and prevent further injury by limiting the movement of the knee. These braces are especially useful for dogs with conditions like luxating patella or mild ligament damage. A dog leg brace can also help alleviate pressure from the knee and offer more mobility, particularly in dogs recovering from surgery or injury.

Other treatment options include physical therapy, weight management, and anti-inflammatory medications. In some cases, surgery may be required, especially in cases of severe ligament damage or arthritis.

Conclusion: Helping Your Dog Live Comfortably

Dog knee pain doesn’t have to be a life sentence for your furry friend. By understanding the causes and symptoms, you can take the necessary steps to help manage their discomfort. Whether it’s through a dog knee brace, physical therapy, or surgery, you can help your dog live a more comfortable life despite knee pain. Just be sure to keep a close eye on their movements, consult your vet, and provide the support they need to stay active and happy for years to come.

[swiftsurgeries]

Understanding Kinematic Alignment in Knee Replacement: A Game-Changer for Personalized Surgery

Introduction

Knee pain caused by arthritis or joint degeneration can severely impact mobility and quality of life. For those requiring a total knee replacement (TKR), traditional surgery methods have been the standard for decades. However, recent advancements in orthopedic surgery have introduced a more personalized approach known as kinematic alignment (KA).

Unlike conventional knee replacement techniques that follow a one-size-fits-all approach, kinematic alignment tailors the implant placement to each patient’s natural knee anatomy. This results in better function, improved comfort, and a faster recovery.

In this blog, we’ll break down what kinematic alignment is, how it differs from traditional methods, and why it’s revolutionizing knee replacement surgery.

What is Kinematic Alignment in Knee Replacement?

Kinematic alignment is a modern surgical technique that aims to restore a patient’s knee to its natural pre-arthritis alignment. It focuses on replicating the individual’s original joint motion, preserving natural movement patterns instead of forcing the knee into a standardized position.

This method considers three key axes in the knee: ✅ Femoral axis (thigh bone movement) ✅ Tibial axis (shin bone movement) ✅ Patellar (knee cap) tracking

By carefully aligning these axes during surgery, the implant functions more like a natural knee, leading to improved comfort, flexibility, and stability.

Key Benefits of Kinematic Alignment in Knee Replacement

1. More Natural Knee Movement

Because the implant placement mimics your original knee anatomy, it feels and moves more naturally. Patients often experience: ✅ Improved bending and straightening of the knee ✅ Less stiffness and discomfort during movement ✅ More balanced weight distribution

2. Faster Recovery & Less Pain

Since kinematic alignment reduces unnecessary soft tissue damage, patients tend to: ✅ Recover faster compared to traditional knee replacement ✅ Experience less post-surgery pain ✅ Return to daily activities sooner

Most patients resume light activities within 4-6 weeks and feel significant improvements by 3 months.

3. Lower Risk of Implant Failure

Poorly aligned knee implants can lead to uneven wear and loosening over time. With kinematic alignment: ✅ The implant is positioned precisely according to natural biomechanics ✅ There’s less stress on the joint, improving longevity ✅ The risk of revision surgery is reduced

4. Better Stability & Comfort

Patients with kinematic alignment often report that their knee feels more stable and comfortable than those with traditional replacements. Since the knee moves in its original motion pattern, there’s less risk of: ✅ Instability or wobbling ✅ Feeling like the knee doesn’t “belong” to you ✅ Difficulty in squatting or climbing stairs

5. Fewer Soft Tissue Complications

In standard knee replacement, surgeons may need to cut ligaments to fit the implant into a fixed alignment. Kinematic alignment avoids excessive ligament cutting, preserving the natural function of the knee and reducing complications.

Who is a Good Candidate for Kinematic Alignment?

Kinematic alignment is ideal for many patients, but it’s particularly beneficial for those who: ✔️ Have moderate to severe knee arthritis ✔️ Want a more natural-feeling knee replacement ✔️ Have a knee that hasn’t undergone severe deformities or trauma ✔️ Are motivated for a faster recovery

However, patients with extreme joint deformities or previous knee surgeries may require a different approach. A consultation with an orthopedic surgeon can help determine if kinematic alignment is the right choice.

How to Prepare for a Kinematically Aligned Knee Replacement

Getting ready for knee surgery involves both physical and mental preparation to ensure the best results. Here are a few key steps:

👉 Strengthen your knee muscles with low-impact exercises before surgery 👉 Maintain a healthy diet to promote healing 👉 Prepare your home with mobility aids like crutches or a walker 👉 Follow your doctor’s pre-surgery instructions on medications and fasting

A well-planned recovery ensures a smoother post-surgery experience and optimal results.

Conclusion: A New Era of Knee Replacement Surgery

Kinematic alignment is redefining knee replacement surgery by offering a more natural, personalized approach. With better mobility, faster recovery, and long-term stability, it provides patients with a higher quality of life compared to traditional methods.

If you’re considering knee replacement and want the best possible outcome, consult a specialist at Swift Surgeries to see if kinematic alignment is right for you.

Take the First Step Toward a Pain-Free Life!

At Swift Surgeries, we specialize in advanced orthopedic procedures, ensuring that you receive the latest surgical techniques for better mobility and faster recovery. Contact us today for a consultation and start your journey toward pain-free movement!

FAQs

❓ How long does recovery take after a kinematically aligned knee replacement? 👉 Most patients recover within 4-6 weeks for light activities and 3 months for full mobility.

❓ Is kinematic alignment better than traditional knee replacement? 👉 Studies suggest that kinematic alignment provides a more natural-feeling knee with less pain and faster recovery.

❓ Will I need physical therapy after surgery? 👉 Yes! Physical therapy is essential to regain strength, flexibility, and full function after surgery.

❓ How long do knee implants last? 👉 With proper alignment and care, knee implants can last 20+ years.

[tailwindpets]

Exploring the Benefits of Luxating Patella Dog Braces

Imagine this: you're out for a stroll with your dog, enjoying the fresh air when, suddenly, your dog pulls up short, limping and looking at you with a sad expression. It’s a heartbreaking moment for any dog owner. If you've ever experienced this, there's a chance your dog might have a luxating patella – a common condition that affects their knees. But what if there’s a simple, effective way to manage it? Enter the dog knee brace.

Luxating patella, or knee cap dislocation, is a condition where the patella (kneecap) moves out of its normal position. While it’s a frequent issue in smaller breeds like Chihuahuas and Poodles, larger dogs can experience it too. This condition can cause pain, limping, and, over time, arthritis if left untreated. But here's the good news: dog braces are an often-overlooked solution that can provide significant relief.

What Are Dog Knee Braces?

A dog knee brace is a specially designed support garment that helps stabilize the knee joint. For dogs suffering from luxating patella, these braces work by providing external support to the knee, allowing the joint to move more naturally and preventing further dislocation. They are made of durable, lightweight materials like neoprene, which ensures comfort while providing the necessary compression and stability.

The Benefits of Dog Knee Braces for Luxating Patella

Pain Relief and Prevention of Further Damage One of the main benefits of a dog knee brace is pain management. By stabilizing the knee joint, the brace reduces the movement that causes discomfort. This can prevent additional wear and tear on the joint, thus lowering the risk of arthritis and other complications. A study from the American College of Veterinary Surgeons showed that knee braces can reduce pain and improve mobility by providing much-needed support to the knee area (source: American College of Veterinary Surgeons).

Enhanced Mobility Luxating patella can severely limit a dog’s mobility. A brace gives the dog added stability, allowing them to walk or run more comfortably. In fact, a 2021 survey found that nearly 75% of dog owners who used knee braces reported a significant improvement in their pet’s ability to move freely (source: Veterinary Practice News). This is essential for dogs who still want to enjoy their walks and playtime, despite the condition.

Cost-Effective Alternative to Surgery Surgery is often recommended for severe cases of luxating patella, but it's expensive and involves a long recovery process. Dog knee braces, on the other hand, are a much more affordable option and can be used as a conservative treatment for milder cases. According to the American Kennel Club, dog braces can be a key component in managing conditions like luxating patella without jumping straight into surgery (source: American Kennel Club).

Improved Quality of Life For many dogs, especially senior pets, joint issues like luxating patella can take a toll on their overall well-being. With a knee brace, dogs experience less discomfort, which leads to a happier and more active life. Not only does this improve their mobility, but it also enhances their mood and behavior, as they’re able to engage more fully in their surroundings.

Why More Dog Owners Should Consider Knee Braces

When you think of dog braces, you might only picture them as something for post-surgery recovery. However, knee braces are becoming an increasingly popular preventive and supportive treatment. For dogs dealing with luxating patella, these braces can be worn daily to avoid discomfort and keep your dog moving without risk of further injury.

If your dog is dealing with knee instability or is at risk for luxating patella, a knee brace is an investment worth considering. It’s not only about pain relief but also about preserving your dog’s long-term mobility and happiness.

In conclusion, luxating patella doesn’t have to define your dog’s life. With the support of a well-fitted dog knee brace, your dog can continue to enjoy an active lifestyle without the constant threat of knee instability. So, if you notice signs of limping or discomfort, don’t wait – consult with your vet and explore the benefits of dog knee braces for your furry companion today!

[omaticwriting]

Enemie da one!! - Chapter 1: Learning bullet magic tricks! (Self taught, gone wrong, gone viral!)

“Mia, is the camera on yet? it’s been twelve minutes already” said a kid with a scratchy voice.his tone was insistent, as another voice, one more feminine replied. Her tone was more confused as the screen of the camera remained pitch black.

“ I think so? But the screen is still black, do you think we did something wrong with it ivan?” she scratched her head, worried if they broke it “can’t be! I made sure it was working before we started” he retorted just what did they do wrong but before we they knew it the screen, once dark now showed a plain backyard, a white fence and a lone fir tree in the distance as two children, a boy with a light brown hair that almost bordered on gray with a hoodie,jeans and snickers with similar color and a girl with blond hair and a teal ribbon on her hair wearing a floral patterned poncho in a similar color to her ribbon that covered most of her body as two small orange wings peeked out her back and a pair of white knee high socks (and no shoes oddly enough).

“Found the problem!” she cheered. Holding what appears to be a camera cap in her hands as a cheeky smile came out. Ivan could only groan at the sight as he could only facepalm at himself for the disappointment they were both in, “I can't believe we’ve wasted twelve minutes trying to fix the camera only to find the reason as to why, was the cap’s still on?!”

Mia innocently shrugs, her smile ever consistent as Ivan sighed before continuing “whatever, let's start now, yeah?” he said to mia who simply replied “mhm!” as she nodded before looking at the camera, a confident smile crept up as he spoke.

“What’s up youtube! It’s me, enemie the one! And today with my friend Mia” he panned the camera to Mia who waved with joy as she said “hi!” before returning the camera to his face “we’ll be doing magic with bullets!” he spoke. Determination and enthusiasm filled his voice as he quickly moved the camera to a white table with several watermelons “wish us luck!” “Ivan? We don’t have magic? Or guns?” Mia stated. A mix of confusion and curiosity, wondering as to how they could use it, let alone get one. Ivan waved her worries aside as he replied with a carefree attitude “Don’t worry about the magic, I just went to your uncle's place and asked if I can copy the stuff he uses ”.

Mia’s eyes widened at his friends reply as she took a step back, she knew her uncle was weird but after he talked to gill and maria of what he actually does, especially what she actually was and on her birthday no less, it felt as if a small rift she never knew reared its head and revealed the ugly truths she never wanted to know, and yet, she still liked him as the weird fun introverted uncle she knew him for even if he now felt intimidating.

“Did he say yes? She asked with some concern. “W-well, no…but i found a way and copied it…” he answered with a nervous tone. sweat poured out as he spoke before continuing. His tone quickly returned “as for guns…BAM!” Ivan reached into his pocket, revealing an airsoft pistol. Runes and marks were poorly carved and etched into throughout the airsoft gun, it’s placement lacked any form nor purpose, a far cry and poor imitation of what his uncle uses that contained a level of elegance and craftsmanship that gave it purpose as ivan’s copy gave a strange glow as small sparks of lighting, harmlessly emitting out of it in all directions.

Mia could only gag at the sight of it, it’s magic was a strong potent mixture of instability and volatility as she attempted to cover nose to stop the smell, or at least lessen the effect on her “ivan, i don’t think it’s a good idea to use that” she spoke with worry and fear as this can’t be good.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine, plus this reminds me of the crits in group castle 8!” he said with a little too much confidence,however, Mia didn’t share the sentiment “Ivan, uncle mike’s didn’t do that, so maybe it’s not good?” she argued a bit. Luckily her worries didn’t fall on deaf ears as Ivan nodded as some caution was good as both never did it all so maybe they need to be a bit careful.

“Okay, i’ll do it and you hide behind the tree with ludwig” he told Mia. he didn’t intend to harm anyone, especially on camera, mia could only nod as she ran behind the tree, hoping it would provide enough protection as she sat down, “I’m gonna do it now!” he yelled as Mia peeked out behind the tree, nodding at him before quickly hiding back to watch a familiar black rabbit munching on grass “hi ludwig” she said cheerfully. Stroking the rabbit's body playfully as he ate grass, completely content, and honestly it was infectious as Mia laid down to watch him be content.

…

Ivan took a deep breath, steading his arm as he aimed the enchanted airsoft gun at the watermelon in front of him “okay, here goes!” he said with the utmost determination he could muster, his target just in his sights as he pulled the trigger.

A surge of volatile energy transferred inside the pellet of the gun and in an instant came out at speeds unimaginable as a loud boom escaped the toy firearm followed by a green beam, the force was magnitudes of what ivan expected, forcing him to let go of the gun before stumbling to the ground below as the watermelon’s on the table combust from the power the pellet left behind, followed by unfamiliar breaking of glass.

“That was awesome!” Ivan cheered in exhausted triumph.Mia, Ludwig in her arms ran to ivan with worry before freezing, her eyes wide by something she saw “Mia, did you see that?! those melons didn’t stand a chance!” he boasted with pride, unaware of the source of her shock expression she had plastered “uhh, Mia? Are you” he asked. Confused as to why she was silent before pointing behind him, turning around his face much like hers.

A window, shattered to pieces as inside, showed broken kitchenware and furniture stumbled about as a lone pellet embedded itself inside one of the many broken chairs. Ivan slowly walked back slowly, Mia not too far behind him, quickly picking up the camera the two left the backyard and slowly began to run after seeing Maria, her eyes opened with an expression of death written all over her, forcing the two to run faster as Ivan quickly moved the camera to his face.

“That’s all the time for today, be sure to like and subscribe! Join me and Mia in the next video where we’ll be spending time with Mia���s uncle mike…possibly forever” he murmured the last words as he turned the camera off.

[blueheartedwolf]

NEED MET!!!! 😭😭 THANK YOU

Help a poor, disabled person buy a wheelchair

Hey y’all, my name is Leif (they/it). I have chronic pain and leg instability due to multiple physical and neurological disorders (main ones being fibromyalgia and chronic knee cap dislocation) and while I use a cane daily, I’ve realized it’s not suitable for long periods of use. I can manage for about 3-4 hours before the extra weight I’m applying to my arms causes a fibro flare. Plus, my fatigue have been severe so far this year. I need a wheelchair so I can actually, maybe enjoy going outside of my home again.

I found one that will work for my needs here, but I have no way of purchasing it myself. What little money I make from my job goes entirely to food, rent, and medical bills. I’m trying to raise $200, which will cover the cost of the chair and a seat cushion. If you’re able to spare a few dollars please consider sending it my way.

p.a.ypal: @LeifNovak

c.a.shapp: $LeifNovak

$200/$200 raised (05/13/22)

[arachnidiots-a]

scars, chronic, & stress for liam 💖

all about health

scars:  how many scars does my muse have? where are they located on my muse’s body? how did they get them? what do they look like? 

liam has an ever rising count of scars. it’s a mix of instances, some from childhood and others more recent from her adventures. a childhood hike and slip left her with a line under her right knee cap. wearing the wrong shoes for years, without breaking them in ever, gave them matching blister scars on the back of their ankles. after a nasty fall and drag in one of their first fights their left side holds a lot of memories. left elbow and waist — a series of jagged scar lines, no more than 2 inches in size. left side of left hand — a rash shaped scar. right side of left wrist — a thin two inch line. walking into a jagged metal corner of a college dorm bed left a line of tiny scars on her left thigh. another fight ended with a scar, widening out like a rift in her skin, about 4 inches in size on her right shoulder going down the top of her arm.

chronic: does my muse have any chronic health conditions / illnesses? how do these affect them from day-to-day? 

liam, like many young female athletes suffers from a combination of depression, headaches, lower back pain, shoulder instability, aches primarily in their wrists and ankles, and avoidant restrictive food intake disorder. they all affect them from day-to-day but some definitely more than other some days. the chronic pain and shoulder instability generally take a backseat. arfid is a daily issue, as she experiences a frequent lack of interest in eating, but it’s not a conscious one. mostly she just realizes she’s not had much to eat at the end of the day, but it does lead her to be more tired and contributes to her headaches.

stress: does my muse handle stress well? what is a surefire sign for others to tell that they’ve become stressed? how does stress affect them mentally / physically? 

liam handles other people’s stress quite smoothly. they’re a good defuser. as for their own? they feel like a lost cause. the most obvious way to tell is when they get really focused with a trivial task of searching or waiting, such as repeatedly searching in the same place for an item while talking to themself, or pacing and unable to break from the act. it can typically and very easily escalate into a panic attack in which case she will seek help. it’s one of the few times where she will actively go to someone even if refusing their help in the past. after settling down she will most likely end up sleeping. stress also leads her to often feel guilty for being vulnerable and regretful of it.

[charaznablescanontoyota]

blasetober day 22: heist.

season 23, day 93.

the thing is this: lorcan smaht (or l-rca- -m-h-, if you prefer) is scattered.

the thing, as well, is this: in eir universe, before ey was sent here, lorcan had never been elsewhere before. ey had never performed the role of undertaker, never dove in after anyone else to flip them negative. ey died before ey got the chance to.

lorcan thinks that being scattered might be worse than being incinerated, but it is a near thing. the physical effects of scattering are more lasting, a fog in lorcan’s brain that ey can’t shake. a seasickness in eir stomach that makes every step feel like one taken on the deck of a rolling boat. lorcan spends most of eir free time lying in bed, or sitting on the bench in the crabs dugout with eir head in eir hands, trying desperately to feel grounded.

being incinerated hurt less. only hurt for a minute, really. but three days ago in charleston, lorcan watched gunther o’brian burn on the field, and ey could swear that the scar on eir back came flaring back to life with white hot pain. the flash of the fire still feels seared into eir eyelids. ey can’t sleep at night without staring at the ceiling - dwelling on those screams in the choux, the dark halo of instability crackling around kaz’s antennae.

the instability passed right away. it was day 90. but lorcan knows it might not pass so easily the next time. not with the way the league has been buzzing about debt, about the exhibition game to come, about firewalkers. eir mind turns the problem over and over in every spare moment ey has, and it makes em about as sick as the scattering does. ey sits on the bench and bounces eir leg and looks away every time silvaire hits the ball, flinching, anticipating the worst. it sucks.

“i’m gonna get some air,” ey says at the top of the fourth, and gets up from the bench.

axel eyes em warily - or lorcan thinks he does. hard to tell, with the blindfold and all.

“do you want company?” he asks.

“uh, no,” lorcan says. “i’m good. i’ll be right back.”

ey’s gone before he can ask em anything else, slipping sideways into one of the many artery-tunnels of the crabitat, trailing a hand along the warm carapace. ey’s never been a big believer in the life of this place, never been one to talk to it like bertie and robbins do, but ey can feel the walls of the tunnel thrumming with energy under eir hand, and - maybe it’s worth a shot. let it not be said that lorcan smaht won’t try anything once.

“hey,” ey says, into the darkness. “uh, hi. i know we don’t - talk? but i - i’m scared. like, more than usual. i, um -”

ey swallows, and looks over eir shoulder. turns down a side passageway and starts to speak a little quieter, just in case. feels the walls, to make sure none of axel’s eyes can see em here.

“i don’t want to die,” ey says. eir voice is very small, barely a whisper. “again, i mean. i - i can’t do that. i’m sorry.”

there’s a pinprick of light at the end of this passage, though lorcan doesn’t know the tunnels well enough to know exactly where this one will spit em out. ey hears voices, boisterous ones punctuated with loud laughter, and follows them.

the tunnel ends in a knee-high, circular window into the away dugout, under the benches currently occupied by the pies. lorcan peers through it. ey sees mostly cleats, both static and pacing, some discarded bats, gloves, caps, and - there. within arm’s reach. something else.

something important. a corked glass bottle that shakes against the ground with the force of the liquid inside of it. a bottle that glows the faint blue color that lorcan recognizes as the mark of something fireproof. maybe it’s optimistic to feel like this is an answer to eir plea, but lorcan is nothing if not an optimist.

“sorry,” ey whispers, bending to stick eir arm through the window. “i’m - sorry.”

ey knows ey’s removing the protection from whoever this bottle is supposed to belong to. ey knows they won’t hear the apology. but it makes the guilt in eir stomach, the sickness of committing a purely selfish act, settle a little.

the bottle vibrates in eir hand, the liquid inside throwing itself against the sides as lorcan holds the potion close to eir chest. eir hands are shaking, too. maybe it’s the scattering, or maybe it’s the adrenaline. ey has to hold the bottle between both of eir palms to transport it unshattered, cupping it like a secret, fingertips leaving sweaty prints on the glass.

when ey stumbles back into the crabs dugout, everyone is staring at em.

“what?” lorcan asks, eir voice tinged with crackling radio static. oh. that’s new.

“lorcan,” pedro says, careful, a man treading on cracked glass. “what did you do?”

[oldschoolimagineblog]

Dating a member of Guns n Roses... - Headcannon

Request: Headcannon about what is like to date each member of gnr?

---

AXL ROSE:

Dating Axl could be described as dating a bomb, both in the positive and negative way. It is something to definitely consider, since he could wake up and be the sweetest man to you and be on time to shows and actually do what hes told and then on another day he'd wake up and be serious or turn his attention to something else, overwhelm himself and explode with the minimum.

Putting emotional instability on the table, listening and caring for him is something that happens often, most times hes comes and talks to you about whatever is happening, after he's exploded, he gets pulled down from the skies with you and grounds his head.

Aside from that, dating Ax meant being spoiled, him buying you clothes, taking you out to diner dates, late night stay-at-home dates, kisses, pda, all of it!

He’s a hopeless romantic, he loves to secretly fantazise about the future you both could have, buying a house with extra rooms for children, putting a ring on your finger, growing old with you, and when you tell him that you want to move in together he lets you know all about his plans for the future. 

He loves to show you off, he’s the type of guy who loves to match, even if is only on small details, he never fails to talk about you, and often drives the band mad with just how much he talks about you while on tour, that is, only when you don’t accompany him since you have to work as well, which by the way, he’s totally against since “I can take care of you just fine” but you refuse since you are independent. 

Although he loves your private diner nights and dates, he also likes to party, hang out with his friends, get drunk, do crazy and stupid stuff sometimes, and you love to go out and just have fun with your friends as well, so you both attend many parties and after parties, also host many in you house eventually when you move in. 

You’re a couple that aren’t afraid of the media or the critics, you are who you are and do what you want, some of Axl arrogance definetly rubbed onto you if you weren’t already an arrogant person, and that meant a lot of experimentation in the sexual way with other people, private orgies with models and actors. 

But when it came to your intimate private sex, it was a rollercoaters, but a good one, one who made your knees weak and made you scream the whole ride. Axl was definetly a giver, he loved to make your eyes roll back and have you moan his name over and over, he loved to be told jusy how good he was making you feel, loved to touch you and make you feel good, sex was sometimes slow and passionate, but it could also be kinky and hard. Blindfolds, hanf cuffs, spankings, toys, he was always up expementing. 

During arguments you and Axl wer both rude, they tend to be explosive, but no matter where you are, you always waited to be in private, never in front of the cameras, and never in front of his or your friends. He says words that hurt and so do you, you attack each other with words and skin the other to the bone, cry and yell and break stuff to let the anger out, and end up having some sort of makeup passionate sex, ask for forgiveness, fix the problem once your anger is out and then move on.

IZZY STRADLIN:

When it comes to dating Izzy, a word that completely describes the vibe is: healthy. Even when he's fucked up on something he'll listen to you, he knows you mean well and when the rest of the boys say he's wipped for you for listening, he just shooks his head. And when is time for you to listen you do as well, in a relationship with Iz the only thing you both want is to grow together and learn from the other.

He is a really private guy, so pda doesn't happen much, although when you're both alone he is turned into a fluff ball. The simple things are what really matter between you and him, holding hands, sleeping next to each other, private dinner dates, showering together or waking up slow in the morning, because of his schedule you don't see each other often, so little moments like those are the ones that he appreciates the most.

Izzy is definitely a family guy; he wanted the simple life, pushing aside that he was in gnr, you and him eventually bought a small home with a big garden to raise a couple kids, have a few dogs, a place have a home a raise a family

During arguments shits never hit the fan, he was the type of guy to walk away to cool off and think about the problem from every point of view, to find a solution, and just talk calmly, and although that irritated you sometimes you were glad he did that, since it gave you time to think about it as well. Arguments would always be solved talking, they could get emotional at times, but they just made your relationship stronger.

Although Izzy was a reserved and quiet guy, every time he deemed appropriate, his hands were on you, loved to fuck you anywhere and anytime, if it wasn't you the one waking him up by rubbing your ass on him it'd be him the one leaving a trail of kisses on your neck, and then after breakfast you'd hop into the shower together and what once was innocent would turn dirty as he fucked you in the shower, sex during movies and before bed, sex in the couch or in the morning, in your backyard during the middle of the night, didn't matter where.

He loved to have you moan in his ear, to have his back scratched and to feel you tight around him right before you came. No matter what kind of sex it was he always loved to hold you close and tight. Love making would always be sweet and tender, but because of your neediness and his, it would end up being dirty and fast.

When you did go out to party with friends however, he was the one who'd talk and talk and talk, with anyone who talked back to him, you on the other hand loved to dance and jump around to the beat of a song, then, drunk out of your asses you'd join the other and talk pure bullshit, pure nonsense and laugh until your stomachs hurt, only to catch a cap home to have some drunken messy sex.

When he left gnr and sobered up he was a mess, a little unsure of the future of his carreer, but he was ready to leave the life he once knew, he wss happy he could finally have the quiet life you and him always talked about, so when he began his solo project and you went back to your normal 9 to 5 job he finally put a ring on it.

STEVEN ADLER:

Dating Steven is just the sweetest thing on earth, although when it got nasty it got nasty.

Steven was sweet and child like no matter how high or sober he was, he wad always loving and caring, always put you first in everything, even when it was time to make decisions about himself. Something that always made you a tad unconfy since you always told that although it was fine to have you as a priority, having himself as one was good too.

But when you two argued, it was like all the heavenly trance of love had become hell in a matter of seconds, screaming and calling each other names, and although you two were grown ass adults you two always stayed childish and it took days to fix an argument.

Steven is always protective of you, always jealous, when you two go out he never leaves you alone, always has a hand around your waist or hips to let everyone know you're his, especially when you visit him on tour with motley crue

When he gets kicked out of gnr you are his support system, he's a mess and using even more then before, depressed and just hopeless, and without you to hold and talk to and spend time with he would have dug himself down deeper into depression then he already was.

On a happy tune, when you guys eventually move in, which is super early in the relationship, you get dogs, not only pugs, and they become your kids before your actual kids come in the picture.

Sex with Steven was always passionate, no matter what, although it wsd passionate as well, between all the dirty talks he always manage to make you feel loved and comfortable, and he never failed to make you laugh during sex as well.

Stevie loved when you rode him, loves to have you on a full view as you fuck him, loves to hold your hips, and spread your ass, loves to touch and play with your breasts, he loves to watch your face twisted in pleasure, he's all down to receive but nothing turns him more than knowing that the reason you're cumin over and over is him.

SLASH:

Dating slash meant parties and drugs anf arguments and laughs and just everything. Dating him is like having a best friend, a friend with benefits, a boyfriend and a husband all together, it meant experimenting.

In sex he just wasn't scared of anything, and the confidence in your relationship that just permited the other to experiment with other people in the bedroom but together obvs, no matter what the other would suggest you and him would be down.

Having that trust also meant that there was enough trust to be open and honest, so when he'd fuck up in someway or you, you'd talk about it, because at the end of the day, mistakes get made, and also you were both mature enough to fix through it and talk about it maturely

Arguments with him were passive aggressive, no yelling or calling names or breaking stuff, more like silent treats and them being broken only to say something that would refer to your argument or by apologies. By the end of it you'd be fine though

Slash wasn't the jealous type, but at the same time if a guy would talk to you a little too sweet he wouldn't hesitate into throwing punches.

You never move in together officially until you get married, he had his house and you had yours, but you hsd half of your stuff in his place and he had half of his place in yours, when you stayed over at his place it'd be for weeks and it was the same for him, you pretty much lived together but had to places.

DUFF MCKAGAN:

Dating duff was a dream, when he wasn't on drugs at least. He was caring and loving, our boy is a hopeless romantic, always had flowers and dates and always showed you off, he was also a kinky bastard.

Sex was either rough or sweet, there was no in between, he treated you like a princess or a whore from hell. Always making sure you're comfortable though, and the after sex was always caring, you'd always showered and then cuddled after.

Duff was always a family man, so often you talked about a future together, with a few kids and some dogs, a house to host holiday parties. You both just knew you'd end up married.

When he was really deep on drugs however, it was a nightmare, when he didn't have his dose he was just the most insufferable human on earth, picking fights just because, and then he'd have his dose and apologise. When he got sober though, he kind of told you that he was going to dissapear for a little to the mountains and have his own way of rehab, and although you were scared you trusted him.

When he came back, after a little sentimental talk about how he felt great and how much y'all missed the other, he proposed.

Duff was never the jealous type, he loved showing you around and taking you places and when someone would approach you he just love to see their face fall when you'd turn them down, and he was always there when the other person would get too pushy.

During arguments even when either of you wanted to just go completely crazy and yell and hurt the other, you never did, instead you'd take breather and talk, talk and talk, repeat yourself over and over and then eventually come to a neutral space and fix the arguments, it's was all healthy

[maya-chirps]

Goddd sometimes I hate being in the weird gray area of what people consider "disabled enough."

Academically, I was excellent bc I had terrible anxiety from failing bc I was being hyped up as the "smart kid" since my hyperfixation abt facts helped me sound smart so I didn't look "troubled enough" to get any help when I asked for an ADHD psyche referral from my school counselor until I got into senior high school and was struggling with grade anxiety so bad bc I forgot something that would doom my grade that I had a public incident forcing the school to recognize my problems.

Physically, people with knee subluxation or knee instability could look pretty abled if they don't run, jump, or rush on the stairs so PE teachers gave me shit for even submitting a medical certificate requesting for exemptions from strenuous activities when in fact I even begged my doctor to allow me to do PE when he was giving a no to my med cert request and I could never make it to dean's list bc of the ceiling cap they made for disabled students who couldn't do the physical work and had to do paperwork instead.

I hate having the need to prove I'm disabled enough to give myself breaks and considerations since people keep thinking "you look pretty abled to me!" and my brain just keeps parroting that in my head and it really feeds into the imposter syndrome I've been working so hard to fight against. The fact that it has gotten so bad that I've also feel like I'm not disabled enough to get disability benefits bc of this is just even more frustrating. "You don't need that! You handled yourself since you were a kid, so why would you need it now?"

I understand how incredibly luckier I am for the most part compared to other people but it's still frustrating when things such as accommodations or considerations are questioned bc I'm not "disabled enough."

I don't know, I'm rambling at this point I think.