#Men are bad for the environment
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Save the Earth. Don't have sons.
By AJIT NIRANJAN

Eating red meat and driving cars explain almost all the difference in pollution between men and women.Imago/ZUMA
This story was originally published by the Guardian and is reproduced here as part of the Climate Desk collaboration.
Cars and meat are major factors driving a gender gap in greenhouse gas emissions, new research suggests.
Men emit 26 pecent more planet-heating pollution than women from transport and food, according to a preprint study of 15,000 people in France. The gap shrinks to 18 percent after controlling for socioeconomic factors such as income and education.
Eating red meat and driving cars explain almost all of the 6.5 to 9.5 percent difference in pollution that remains after also accounting for men eating more calories and traveling longer distances, the researchers said. They found no gender gap from flying.
“Our results suggest that traditional gender norms, particularly those linking masculinity with red meat consumption and car use, play a significant role in shaping individual carbon footprints,” said Ondine Berland, an economist at the London School of Economics and Political Science and a co-author of the study.
The disparaging term “soy boy” has been used by right-wing figures, including Vice President JD Vance
Research into gender gaps is often plagued by difficult decisions about which factors to control for, with seemingly independent variables often confounded by gendered differences. Men need to eat more calories than women, for instance, but they also eat disproportionately more than women. They also have higher average incomes, which is itself correlated with higher emissions.
Previous research from Sweden has found men’s spending on goods causes 16 percent more climate-heating emissions than women’s, despite the sums of money being very similar.
Marion Leroutier, an environmental economist at Crest-Ensae Paris and a co-author of the study, said: “I think it’s quite striking that the difference in carbon footprint in food and transport use in France between men and women is around the same as the difference we estimate for high-income people compared to lower-income people.”
The most powerful actions a person can take to cut their carbon pollution include getting rid of a gas-powered car, eating less meat, and avoiding flights.
But efforts to challenge car culture and promote plant-based diets have provoked furious backlashes from pundits, who perceive it as an attack on masculinity. The term “soy boy” has been used by far-right figures, including Vice President JD Vance and the self-described misogynist influencer Andrew Tate, to present progressive men as weak.
Soy is a common protein source in vegan cuisine, but three-quarters of the world’s soya beans are fed to animals to produce meat and dairy.
The French researchers suggested the gender differences in emissions could explain why women tend to be more concerned about the climate crisis, arguing the greater personal cost of reducing their emissions could cause men to avoid grappling with the reality of the climate emergency.
But they added that greater climate concern could lead women to do more to cut their emissions. “More research is needed to understand whether these differences in carbon footprints are also partly due to women’s greater concern about climate change and their higher likelihood of adopting climate-friendly behaviors in daily life,” Leroutier said.
#the Climate Desk collaboration#The gender gap in greenhouse gas#Cars and the environment#Meat consumption and the environment#Save the Earth#Don't have sons#Men are bad for the environment
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B2MEM - "Hope"
@spring-into-arda (301 words; a continuation of my earlier AU where Finarfin arrives in Beleriand to find nothing but ruins)
There was someone outside the camp.
Finarfin should mention this to someone, probably, but he couldn’t prove it; there was no movement in the endless fields of high, stinging grass, no rustle in the dead limbs of the trees. No noise. No perceptible hint.
But there was an itch at the back of his mind that insisted someone was here.
Madness, probably. A manifestation of desperate hope after weeks of marching through Beleriand and finding nothing, nothing, nothing. Failing that, surely it was the Enemy, at last showing himself.
Surely.
But the itch at the back of his mind felt . . . not like the hunts he had never particularly enjoyed, but that he had gone on for his children’s sakes. It felt like the games they had played when they were small, and he would walk into his office and know they were there even before he had spotted a tiny foot peeking out from behind his desk.
The madness of hope.
Even if Artanis was still alive, was still free, surely she would approach the hosts her father was leading openly, not creep around the edges of his camp like a thief.
He shot one last look at the dead emptiness of the woods before nodding to the guards and letting himself back into the command tent.
The flap fell behind him. The itch intensified.
He turned.
A gaunt figure was sitting at his desk. There was barely an ounce of flesh left on the figure waiting, in dead stillness, in the chair; just bruised and bloodied skin stretched across knife sharp bone.
The only hint of life was in the eyes: dark and haunted with more horror than Arafinwe could even now imagine, but still burning with a hint of dread fire.
“Hello, uncle,” rasped Makalaure. “I’ve come to bargain.”
#b2mem 2025#maglor#finarfin#au#maglor is having a very bad time#he is once again in charge#he has like a dozen men left#plus Elrond#he is hoping to convince finarfin that he's the only surviving feanorian with actual blood on his hands#and trade information on the environment plus his surrender for food for the rest of them and a promise to look after elrond#. . . he may not have told Lauriel this#or elrond#this will definitely go over well when they find out
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the trajectory of understanding someones politics from like two things they say is kind of crazy. iskalls video declaring he will be settling this in the court of law, claiming everyone was being malicious and then deleting any comments questioning him, all point to what kind of audience and community he wants to foster bc all the comments are just misogynistic chuds who are cheering him on. have fun with your dudebro libertarian audience man. when is your right wing grift gonna start.
#idek what im trying to say in this post but the entire video left a bad taste in my mouth#doing the textbook thing after being cancelled/outed as a predator which is to say everyone hates me#and bc the audience that wouldnt tolerate this behaviour is gone#now you have an echo chamber of yes men#i mean this also doesnt reflect well onto the hermits but i know they did this to save their own ass#bc they have a family friendly image they needed this shut down quick#theres a sad boyz episode where they talk abt this where its like. you should at least talk it out bc when ppl get cancelled#they end up in these environments w ppl (usually also right wing wow) who just say you did nothing wrong sir#ala elon fanboy#ok this is getting incoherent im jsut saying theres gonna be right wing turn 100%
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I'm probably going to post about this on the MW subreddit, but I still find it pretty hilarious that most fans assume the "struggles" Jimbalaya was dealing with back on Earth were related to criminal acts (usually in order to demonize Curly) meanwhile most of the pieces of clues I've gathered from the HFIM dlc and the QnAs we got about the characters' lives have lead me to believe Jimbalaya's struggles were about poverty.
In the HFIM dlc we're pretty clearly playing a fish version of Jimbalaya, and the whole game is about how a capitalistic system ruins people (fish) and those that climb up help perpetuate the system and those that go down just get eaten. So it's pretty interesting to me that Jimbalaya fish even after consuming other fish and items... keeps going down.
But it was the third QnA that sealed it for me. Curly's hobbies are around a lot of friends and family that he could join interesting things. And of course play snow sports in Winter. Winter snow sports... which let's be honest is a pretty expensive hobby to have. Meanwhile, Jimbalaya can't afford any hobbies other than joining one with Curly.
I think this kinda just adds more fuel for Jimbalaya to both envy yet aspire to be like Curly.
I dunno, it's just fascinating to me watching so many fans claim the "struggles" were so obviously to do with crime when most of the current evidence I noticed seems to point towards money related issues.
-🌟 Anon
I think both are valid and valuable interpretations that’s the MW fandom makes but I think the major problem with it is the severity in which they make Jimmy out to be every factor wrong with men in society.
Like I think it’s interesting to use the idea he has some record, misdemeanors/petty stuff, that has complied to make his life more difficult. It’s all his own doing for his entitlement and general behavior but it can also be used to comment on Capitalism banking on desperation and envy. A lot of his actions are desperate because he knows his crimes on the Tulpar will make it virtually to climb any ladder, anywhere anymore due to their weight. Like in the end the problem is undeniably how the proverbial rat race creates environments that fosters Jimmy’s and creates ineffective systems like Curly represents.
Curly on the other hand benefits from the corporate part of it with his financial freedom, stability and prestige but he too is socially stagnant, deeply unhappy in the identities placed on to him and unrecognizable as anything other than a cog in the machine. I think this goes in tandem with the other members too as the identities placed onto them in the scenario all represent stages in capitalism and class discrepancies: Anya represents largely marginalized identities (particularly women in blue collar fields/harassment) and how they ultimately have to fend for themselves. Daisuke a sort of perception of both a class between Curly and the rest, protected no matter the effects of the establishment due to his home life but at the same time he is the metaphorical future gen, things stripped from him as the older generations squabble amongst themselves in private conversations leaving him unequipped. Then there’s Swansea being sort of those who have lived through it, knowing how it ends but ultimately still lack the skills, resources and want to change it, letting it cycle.
The entire thing with Jimmy circles back to the fandom ultimately wanting easy solutions to the events in the games, a face to blame and a weird black and white thinking to issues that are dangerous to view that way.
#an off tangent that is semi related is the idea of the crash happened Curly deserved some punishment I see in the fandom and while I agree#he needs to reflect and possibly build back the trust Anya lost in him the idea completely ignores the struggles he faced and the abuse he#faced and it’s like again the entire absolving the abuse of an imperfect victim as a factor in their behavior#but back to the ask the game tackles so many things and tries to not make it one note or stereotypical but conversations lead to that cuz#too many people are unwilling to admit how subjective good choices are and how environment affects places a big part in how we deal with#situations like everyone says what they will do and would but no one sits and thinks of the way it would be in the situation with the#dynamics at play and can’t see the other lenses or metaphors#mouthwashing#🌟 anon#ask#mouthwashing game#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#also if I get asks about Jimmy can you just use his name like a big part of why I think people can’t properly#engage in this game is the decentering of Jimmy as the main character and main perpetrator like he is the ultimate reason everything gets so#bad and no one wants to talk about him outside of we know he’s bad already like it’s immature and why guys can get away with it as we focus#on the men that don’t stop them and not stopping the men that do or their mentalities past a surface level amount of disdain#like say his name show his face don’t let him slip through the cracks like the game tries to show you he did#his whole mode of operation is in the dark and out of sight and it’s still perpetuating that because you refuse to show him#at least on my in box I’ll talk about him and analyze him and I would prefer if we didn’t speak about him like a forbidden word cause that’s#how the assault of victims gets looked or glossed over when you don’t say what it is or who did in all seriousness
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2013 beach trip? seems a little gay to me
yeah… you got me there… it kinda is…

It’s also the one where mav sprains his wrist

#idk anything about surfing don’t come for me#(bad Californian)#one of several times mav comes out to hawaii to visit compacflt ice#because he says it’s unfair to make ice to do all the traveling to see him#and Hawaii is Hawaii#fun for the whole family#if you’re navy men whose whole command continues to contribute to the degradation of Hawaiis environment but that’s a separate discussion#not as fun as gay beach episode!!!#pete maverick mitchell#tom iceman kazansky#icemav#top gun#asks#‘seems a little gay to me’ yall have me pegged fr
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Am i surprised that privileged white men comment like that on a sexual harassment case? No.
Am I still disappointed about it? Yes.
#lance stroll#f1#valterri bottas#nico hulkenberg#daniel ricciardo#i wished they would take it more serious since it is a serious matter#but that uneducated men we are talking about#nothing will change until they get educated on how it is like to live in environments like f1 as a woman#but the governing body sadly wont do anything since there just as bad
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omg sorry for inconsistency. skipping kazui bc im pretty sure he's just. gay. so next is amane! please share your opinions/thoughts on her gender/ sexuality.
trans includes: transman/transwoman, transfem/ transmasc, non-binary, agender/genderless, genderfluid, and anything else not cis.
#milgram#amane momose#kazui likes men. pretty sure that’s canon#guys pls I thought mahiru’s allo-ness was canon but ppl had different interpretations (which I can see makes sense!#kazui is gay tho he has to be#also pls don’t be weird . I and many others have questioned our sexual/romantic orientation/gender identity at a young age#i dont think amane is in a health environment obv or in the right headspace to even consider who she likes#I love her so bad oh my god she’s so . traumatized#I can imagine her tho thinking gender is dumb like I’m not a girl I’m amane yk#it’s just interesting to think abt ^^
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Jorge Martin is kinda cunty for having a tattoo of his girlfriend's eyes on his forearm. A bisexual slut of a man being obsessed with you enough to get you tattooed on his body is actually the dream scenario for a lot of my girlfriends so it's cute that he has committed to the bit. Jorge I'm sorry I simply wasn't aware of your game like that.
#jorge martin#jm89#motogp#pramac#pramac racing#tbh I have been around enough men to know that usually a tattoo is like overcompensation for some hilariously bad behaviour#but in this case I will choose to believe he just really really likes his girlfriend#also I will still stand by my opinion that he just looks like a handsome south delhi boy#his natural environment is inside DLF Emporio wearing a silk shirt#buying ugly things from gucci#I love his down low vibes
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Last year I left my lawn till late because some wildlife orgs had advised that leaving it a bit later into spring is good for all the insect life. Of course, my neighbour assumed I was horribly sick and unable to move for making such a grievous grassy error that he went did it for me. Apparently it was an eyesore! I wasn't sure if i should be touched at the freely given neighbourly help or just offended at the slight upon my poor maligned grass patch. Neat lawn people just freak me out. He does his in the middle of rainstorms and I get horrible visions of those cartoon characters who electrocute themselves and you can see all their bones.
oh man!!! i know that feeling!!! a bunch of my lot was ripped up one year trying to find a broken water line, and so instead of grassing it over i bought a mix of wildflower seeds to try and grow a meadow along one side of my property that i thought would be a very pretty surprise for everyone in late summer. i live in a small town in a rural area with no HOAs or anything, but there are a lot of retired men on my street and Lawn Care is a major hobby. there is GREAT long-standing debate over The Right Mower Height for the best looking grass... and so on.
and they kept mowing my meadow down!!!
it was with such good intentions -- and i felt soooooo guilty for not mowing the REST of my lawn that was actually grass -- that i didn't know how to ask them to stop until the damage was done. and now they're always commenting on how that area is "just weeds" YEAH I KNOW MAN!! those aggressive bare-earth pioneer plants are gonna take over if you don't let my flowers grow long enough to seed!! no going back now!!
at one point i told some neighbors that i felt really bad for being the neighborhood embarrassment and they were like what? no you're not? and anyway i win because one of my neighbors is a huge huge dick, and it pays dividends to be as sweet as possible and act very grateful even when my neighbors overstep.
my current issue is the neighbor who always gives me the worst home care advice and really thinks he's helping me by cutting up rotten wood and stacking it on my woodpile while i'm at work, where i then have to burn through it to get to anything else, but he doesn't really take in social cues and he lost his wife and desperately needs to be of service to someone At All Times, so the truth is that sometimes the thing i contribute to the community is to be the neighbor who graciously accepts help even when it's not helpful.
#chatter post#anonymous friend#i am convinced that ride mowers are a form of meditation that's acceptable for men#bad for the environment but probably good for their mental health#people around here have a lot of property to mow so it really is hours and hours#my lot is only a quarter acre so i should just mow it instead of spending stupid amounts of money paying someone else#to tear around and cause all kinds of damage and mow over some actual garden beds with their speed mowing. ugh.#but i bought a lawn mower and never used it so i think that theory has been fully tested
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Not going to share the video because the replies are vile, but I was just reminded that the Buffalo Bills spent an entire game playing songs by Taylor's exes in the playoffs including The 1975. That is incredibly weird behaviour.
And I have been a sports fan since I left the womb. Used to tell my mom I wanted to be a hootball (football) player when I was little. I have a weird love of fans from Philly for crying out loud. But there is something that is still so weird about the Bills fans. Not Sabres fans. They're fine and long-suffering.
#I get making the environment uncomfortable for the opposing team#The fact the Bills were actively weird in regards to Taylor with naming food after her as well is notable#The video is about how they (Kelces and Swifts) were surprised at how bad it was#I think the music thing is overlooked#Especially after what some of those men did to her
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"There is no love without sin."
Disclaimer: This post is specifically about Nightcrawler as depicted in the original X-Men: The Animated Series and X-Men '97. It is not (necessarily) relevant to any other versions.
In both of Nightcrawler's episodes from the 90s cartoon - "Nightcrawler" and "Bloodlines" - he is shown to be a devout Christian, with him essentially preaching about God's forgiveness in both episodes. With today's TV landscape, I naturally assumed that this would be toned down in '97, but they did mention his faith a couple of times and Gambit kept referring to him as a priest. They even specifically refer back to the episode "Nightcrawler", further cementing that the '97 Nightcrawler is the same one from the original show. Normally that would be a given in a series continuation, but there's a specific line that he says that feels very antithetical to how he was written in the 90s: "There is no love without sin."
I know there are posts floating around about how just because we think a character wouldn't say something doesn't mean they didn't, and that's very true. No arguments there. But the issue I have with this line in particular is that Nightcrawler is supposed to be a Christian, and no Christian would say this.
1 John 4:7-21 uses the phrase "God is love" twice in this passage - not that God has the ability to love, but that He is love. And 1 John 3:5 and 1 Peter 2:22 both state that in God there is no sin - He is incapable of sinning. So when Nightcrawler says, "There is no love without sin," this goes against what should be his core beliefs, because the God he worships is specifically described as "love" with "no sin".
If the show had tried to write away his Christianity, giving him a change of faith, there wouldn't be an issue with the line. But it doesn't do that. In fact, the whole reason he's on Genosha is to help with their communities of faith, so his Christianity must still be a part of who he is.
This post isn't here to try and convert or preach to anyone. I simply wanted to convey why I feel this particular line was so out of character for him to say.
#marvel#x-men 97#i know it'll sound weird to a lot of people but this line really took me out of the episode#which is a shame because otherwise i loved it#and just nightcrawler in general#he was a bit goofier than in the original but he was also in a much freer environment with no bad things happening#you know at first lol sob
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jd vance at CPAC talking about "attacks on masculinity" and how current "culture" supposedly wants to turn "everybody, whether male or female, into adrogynous idiots who think the same, talk the same, and act the same" is the same evangelical rhetoric i grew up with.
ive struggled to remember exactly how it was taught to me that androgyny or being otherwise gender non-conforming was wrong, but it was through fleeting bits of rhetoric like this. there's nothing incredibly violent about that sentence, but there's an underlying disgust there. this is coming from the group who believes being gay is an abomination.
vance went on to say that "we actually think that god made male and female for a purpose," and he doesn't elaborate, but he is alluding to separate responsibilities and abilities according to biblical teachings (woman is subservient to man).
blurring the lines of gender is scary, gross, and wrong to them. youre not supposed to do that (that threatens their power structure). i was enthralled by androgynous people when i was a kid. i thought androgynous/gnc people were so cool and beautiful, and i kept these feelings a secret, because even as a child i knew i wasnt supposed to think that way. yes it's so silly to force a strict expression of gender upon your kid, yes it's silly that i was so afraid to voice admiration for androgyny, but this is part of the underlying reason for their transphobia. to them, it's a gross twisting of your god-ordained gender. you're sinning by not conforming to whatever expectations were set upon you at birth. it's stupid and such a minor thing to get upset over, but it takes years of work to break out of that belief.
#this is so very basic but it's just wild to be able to point to something and go. 'oh yeah. THATS why i didnt process these feelings about#my gender sooner"#ofc beyond just wrong/gross/a sin is the fact that if there arent strict rules about gender and power then their whole system is at risk of#falling apart. i could probably make this whole post more succinct but at the moment that isnt happening#anyway. this stuff is spread by the church and enforced in that environment AND at home. for me it was to the point that i felt guilty for#thinking men in makeup were pretty. anything slightly out of line was Bad#men wearing eye makeup was 'gross' (per my mother) i didnt even consider the possibility of being trans myself. all i had were#fantasies of passing for a boy and going on some adventure assuming a different identity. and even then part of me felt a little wrong for#finding joy in those thoughts. all this anxiety and guilt for what.#deconstruction#exvangelical#gender#gender stuff
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I don't think its clean up. If you have government run healthcare the government has a vested interest into keeping everyone fit and healthy just so they don't lose a bunch of money. It's why the NHS has a butt tonne of healthy eating promotion. It's why autistic people can't move to New Zealand (literally it's because on paper we cost more to the government and they don't want medical tourism)
Whenever Americans come to Europe they always comment on how nice the food is and how it's 'not filled with chemicals/sugar' that's not the companies. That's the government going... if you have more then x% of sugar you have to pay a tax.. you need to have a traffic light system showing the percentages so people can easily understand what they are putting in their body.
America doesn't have that... the more you are ill the more money they get off you... the goverment and healthcare has an interest in keeping you alive enough to pay your medical bills but I'll enough that you keep needing it. Cleaning up food is not about allergies at all, it's about what it is in the food.

#medicare for all#you are lot allowed to turn this about veganism / or anti gmo.#veganism is actually very very bad for the environment unless you are locally souring that stuff... the air miles alone do it#I have nothing against vegans... but I would rather eat meat from a farm down the road then get quinoa from South America flown to the U.K.#and GMOs are good#unless it's men GMOd not to produce seeds and they have copyrighted the genome sequence#because capitalism#but gmos provide food for drought places#which is so good
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AURGHH I KEEP FLASHBACKING TO THE AWKWARD SITUATION TODAY
#it feels unreal#gonna cry#I wish guys didn’t exist !!! that way I wouldn’t be so awkward around them !!!!#like it’s so mean to expect me to suddenly be okay with interacting with them when I’ve been shut out from them for most of my development#years#its like so unhealthy 🧍♀️#anyways I already have a tough time talking when I’m in a mildly stressful situation but …#like my words always get stuck in my throat / I just mumble random nonesense / I don’t know how to articulate my thoughts / stammering#I’m a rlly anxious person and it’s rlly debilitating 🧎♀️#who ever thinks stammering is cute can respectfully … idk IM JUST LIKE 😭😭😭 how’s stammering cute I am stressed beyond belief !!!#I hate socialisation#anyways ughhh that was so embarrassing pls like now I think I made him feel bad about himself …#I didn’t mean to I swear I would never 😭 he just misunderstood me is all 😭#Muslim Girls CANT TOUCH ANY GUY INCLUDING HANDSHAKES FISTBUMPS ETC#pls … why are guys trying to fist bump me I am not a bro 😔#I Ran out of the lab basically#my mum when I told her the story she was sympathising w him more than me and said I should get over it !!!!#girl … I cannot stand men … even the normal ones creep me out to some extent#I’ve been shut out from them for centuries everyone wants a token goody two shoes good girl#who doesn’t talk to boys until she’s thrust into said mixed environment and is expected to deal with it how about no …#dora daily#yeah I dislike every male idk they make me feel weird ? it’s hard to explain 😭#it wouldn’t be that deep if everyone didn’t slaughter malala for the handshake UGHHH ID RATHER JUST SHAKE HIS HAND WHY IS THIS AN ISSUE#like on one hand I could’ve said hey I’m not allowed in my religion but doesn’t that just sound like rlly bad ?#the only thing I managed to tell him was after I stared at him like a deer in headlights was “uh …. I … can’t”#and he was like wdym you can’t LIKE LOOKING UPSET 😭#I DONT DO WELL WITH MAKING PPL UPSET IM SOBBING#I hope he didn’t take it personally it’s just 😭😭😭#anyways time to shut up !!!
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I knew the state of the world was rough but I didn't realize it was "every therapist in the city is booked" rough
#I burned through coping mechanisms like cheap oil and I am barely holding it together#I can only therapy talk myself through a flashback so many times#Im just five men in a trenchcoat pretending to be functional#Fucked up so bad at work today cause I switched a good eight fucking times and poor Art had to clean up my mess from friday#Ruby is too understanding of my struggles for someone who does my job on top of her job#I wish somebody had trained me even a little bit for this position cause reverse engineering competence doesn't work in this environment
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: ̗̀➛ bouncer simon 'ghost' riley - 01
cw : sexual theme, small sexual assault scene, violence
ㅤㅤ ㅤ ㅤㅤㅤ collection - prev ⋆ next
the new bouncer had all the girls intrigued. you'd been working here for almost a year, and you'd never seen anyone like him. and god, you'd seen some weirdos in a strip club.
on his first day, the girls had been mostly intrigued by his physique-big, strong, face covered by a surgical mask and the hood of his hoodie, with 'security' written in bold across his back. but now, all the girls, you included, had one goal… hearing his voice.
that was the thing with ghost-how he had been introduced to the staff-he didn't talk. when drunk men started bothering the dancers, he didn't need to say a word. he just approached, and the fuckers got the message. if they didn't, he grabbed them and threw them outside. not a single word spoken.
word was that he was ex-military, and it would make sense. his sheer physical strength alone was proof-you had seen him throw a man to the floor like he weighed nothing, and that guy had to be at least 130 kilos. his posture was another giveaway, rigid and disciplined, always on his feet, eyes scanning the room like a hawk. then there was his silence-no one ever heard him coming. sure, the music was loud, but even without it, he moved like a ghost, blending so seamlessly into his environment that predicting his next move was nearly impossible. guess he earned that nickname.
but why would an ex-military man end up in a strip club in manchester? he either fucked up bad, or he was just done.
truth was, simon had been injured-his knee was shot, pain was constant, and command had benched him for good. no more deployments, no more battlefield. just a desk and a slow death in an office. so he walked.
he hated the way he would softly limp. to untrained eyes, it was barely noticeable, but to him? he felt like he was half of himself . this job was the only thing he'd found outside the military that still required some of his skills. he had no interest in working around soldiers-too petty for that. they didn't want him anymore, so he sure as hell wasn't going to help them train new recruits.
so he ended up here, at the magic stick. what a stupid fucking name. but the job? same as always-observe, analyze, attack.
it wasn't so bad. the job was easy, the place mostly clean, and the pay was good. he didn't need to socialize. sure, the girls had tried to sweet-talk him, but he'd just deadpanned them until they gave up. the only one who never really tried was the one he always had his eyes on. his gaze lingered on you when you were on the pole, when you walked past him to head to the back, when you led a man by the hand to the private rooms.
you were on your break, smoking by the staff door when he stepped out. normally, you were never shy-especially not around men, given your line of work-but there was something about ghost that made your hands sweat. you meekly offered him a fag, your voice quieter than usual. he said nothing. just looked at you, unreadable as ever. yet, somehow, the silence wasn't awkward. you were.
maybe it was nerves, maybe it was the way he carried himself, all stillness and power, but something had you spiraling. before you could stop yourself, you started ranting about customers, the same way you did with the girls inside. anything to fill the space, anything to ignore the heat creeping up your neck. call it a defense mechanism, call it whatever you wanted-but right now, you just needed to stop feeling so damn flustered.
once you were finished with both the rant and the fag, you made your way inside, quickly. "thanks for the therapy, ghost." you'd said. he still had his eyes on you, his expression unreadable, but you guessed you had annoyed him. just as you turned your back on him, passing through the door, you heard him.
"name's simon," he grunted, voice thick with that unmistakable manchester accent.
back inside, your cheeks were burning. his voice was so deep it should be illegal. it suited him, no doubt, and you'd be lying if you said just hearing his name didn't send a shiver down your spine. how could a man you had no shot with be that damn attractive? as you made up your little scenarios at night, you imagined his groans in your ears. you'd known he'd groan.
but life went on. you danced, he watched. until one night…
it was a busy night, even with only an hour until closing. many men were still sitting, watching all the girls on stage. you were out looking for the biggest fish-the man with the most drinks on his table, the one whose clothes looked the most expensive. it hadn't been a slow night, but you liked the money. little did you know, you were being observed too.
when you had chosen your target, you took him to the back. men here were always so eager for private dances. you explained everything meekly- how long, how expensive. and most importantly, you told him: no touching, not from him. "i do all the work, honey," you said, sitting down on his lap.
as you started your show, you knew he was going to be a difficult one. he kept trying to reach for your hips, your thighs. at first, you stayed calm, pushing his hands down gently with a soft smile on your lips. but as he insisted on moving his hands, you decided you were done. you quickly put your top back on, told him it was on the house, and that he could just leave now.
he didn't really seem happy with the idea. you knew what was coming, so you reached for the hidden button, pressing it to call security.
the man had approached you, trying to grab you again, pulling at your top, yelling for you to go back to dancing, calling you a whore. he even went as far as grabbing a handful of your arse. but before he could do more, he was on the floor, ghost on him, fists landing on his face.
once he decided the fucker had had enough, he dragged him outside. he glanced back at you before leaving, like he was waiting for something. "'m 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘦," you said, nodding at him. to be honest, you were more than fine-you were hot and bothered. he had been protecting you. you.
you had worked in far worse strip clubs; you were no stranger to that type of behavior. that's why you liked this place so much: the security was efficient. even the guys before ghost didn't make you wait 10 minutes here. and ghost-he arrived in a matter of seconds. you didn't really care how he had gotten there so quickly.
after closing, you decided to take a shower at the club. even though you were sadly used to vile men, it was never a pleasant experience. you told the girls not to wait up for you; you knew the manager wouldn't be leaving for another hour, so you took your time.
what you didn't know was that simon always waited for you in the shadows. he liked to watch you reach your car, making sure nothing happened to you on the short walk from the door to the parking lot. so when he saw all the girls making their way out, but not you, he got concerned. he decided to investigate. he never thought he'd stumble upon this.
you were in the showers, and he heard the water running. reassured that you were okay, he was about to make his way out, ready to wait in the dark like a good guard dog. but just as he put his hand on the handle, the sweetest sounds he'd ever heard reached his ears.
"simon," you moaned.
you had no idea he was here, he knew that. he smirked, wondering how long you had been touching yourself to the thought of him. probably as long as he had with you. he had seen the look on your face in the private room, your eyes screaming '𝘧uck m𝘦.' he hadn't thought anything of it then, chalking it up to the adrenaline. but now? you were going to get what you asked for.
silently taking his clothes off, he made sure to lock the bathroom door. no one was here but you and the manager, but he was still thorough. old habits died hard. he took his mask off too. after all, he had no intention of this being a one-time thing. his sweet girl could see his face; he didn't care.
pulling the shower curtain open, you didn't even notice that. tsk. oh, that wouldn't do. he'd have to teach you to be more aware of your surroundings. the world was a very bad place.
you jumped when you felt a warm body behind you, hands on your hips. you were about to move your own hand from between your legs, but it was stopped. "don't stop on my account, lovie," simon murmured in your ear, his voice low and rough. "wanna hear all those sweet sounds you're makin'"
when you didn't do anything, you felt his teeth nip at your throat. "what? gettin' shy on me?" he laughed darkly, and you just whimpered in response. "ah, i see. need me to do all the work, yeah?" he asked, the smirk clear in his voice. and so, he did all the work.
you had been right, he did groan.
#the word bouncer is so funny to me#*nosferatu voice* you must bounce on it#call of duty#cod#cod mw2#cod mw3#cod ghost#simon ghost riley#simon riley#ghost#task force 141#cod simon riley#cod blurb#bouncer!simon riley#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#ghost x reader#ghost x you#ghost blurb#simon riley blurb#cod x reader#cod x you#silly's writing
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