#My brain just uses a kind of logic I can’t explain

[petercushingscheekbones]

My brain is really good at making connections even though I usually don’t know shit. So sometimes people mistake me for being actually smart

[michanvalentine]

I don’t want to classify anything—these situations all suck equally. But I’ve been thinking about the differences inherent in forms of abuse. I’m using the girls as a comparison to talk about Astarion, though all the companions in BG3 carry their fair share of trauma. Karlach was sold and had her heart ripped out against her will, replaced with an infernal machine, for the sole purpose of becoming a soldier and serving in a war that wasn’t hers. Lae’Zel grew up in a harsh, unforgiving society where weakness wasn’t tolerated. She was forged and sharpened like a blade to become an infallible, ruthless assassin in service to Vlaakith. The same can be said for Shadowheart, as if they were two sides of the same coin. Every punishment, every lesson, no matter how terrible, was delivered with the aim of training these "soldiers," dedicating their entire being to a cause. A cause they believed in—Karlach being the exception. Regardless, everything was for a specific purpose, almost regulated. Predictable, logical, consequential. Their results were recognized and approved (especially within the ranks of Shadowheart and Lae’Zel), perhaps even rewarded.

In my opinion, this is different from the abuse Astarion endured. Let me explain. Some of Cazador’s punishments were undoubtedly intended to instill terror and obedience in his vampire spawn, discouraging any form of defiance and shaping them into exactly what he wanted—tools for his own purposes (known only to him). Up to this point, the mechanics are the same as those for the girls. But Cazador is also a sadist, and this is where the dynamic changes, taking on an unpredictable and utterly senseless turn, especially for the one suffering it. It’s about gratuitous cruelty. Pain inflicted and endured without reason—just because. Because he feels like it. Because it amuses him. Because he can. And for the one subjected to this treatment, the mind can’t find a logical explanation to cling to. It shatters. It wanders in search of meaning that doesn’t exist, because the suffering isn’t due to a cause or a transgression—it’s purely a matter of whim.

You can’t tell yourself, I was given a mechanical heart to make me stronger in combat. You can’t say, I killed my training partner to prove to my people that I was the strongest (and be celebrated for it). Or, I tortured those people because I needed to develop these skills to become a better spy. These are horrific motivations, of course, but they’re still explanations that provide meaning. The brain needs meaning—it needs it to avoid breaking apart. It needs to understand, to form connections, to explain things. And if no reason exists, it creates one. And it’s easy to imagine that in a situation like Astarion’s as a vampire spawn, he might have found the meaning of his suffering in himself. He became the cause. I’m being punished because I wasn’t good enough, because I said something wrong, because I’m worthless, because I don’t deserve anything better, because I’m flawed and broken.

Astarion knows that Cazador is a sadistic bastard and that there’s no sense or purpose behind what he does to him. But this is the insidious work the brain does—it’s not rational, it’s not voluntary. Finding meaning is necessary, because otherwise, everything would be chaos, and that would be even more terrifying to conceive.

There’s also the unpredictability that plays a crucial role. Unlike Lae’Zel and Shadowheart, who are punished for some kind of transgression or to learn a lesson—and therefore know when to expect consequences based on their actions—Astarion could just as easily be punished for no reason at all. Simply because his master feels like it. One moment, Cazador is calm; the next, he isn’t. For no apparent reason (and there doesn’t even need to be a pretext—the vampire lord can do whatever he wants with his spawn. He doesn’t have to explain himself, right? They’re slaves with no human rights, unlike Lae’Zel and Shadowheart, who live in a structured and orderly—albeit hierarchical—context. Karlach, in this case, is closer to Astarion in concept).

As a result, the stress is overwhelming. There’s never a moment of peace or respite. You can never know when there will be consequences or for what reason. Everything is too undefined, too volatile, and this keeps Astarion constantly on edge. After all, the horror is inevitable—it will happen sooner or later because you’ll never be good enough, useful enough, quiet enough, etc. It’s exhausting—for the body, the mind, and the spirit. It also instills a fear that is no longer connected to or proportionate to a real, tangible stimulus. It becomes a generalized, ever-present fear and anxiety.

Anyway, just a small reflection on these differences because I need to ramble about things regardless of whether they make sense. By now, you know I write almost everything that crosses my mind, even though I should probably filter it better sometimes…

And yes, I know the girls’ situations are more complex than this. Here, I haven’t addressed many aspects that characterize their experiences and responses to them (like the frightening memory gaps Shadowheart struggles with). I just used a few points to talk about Astarion and what I believe is a unique aspect of his specific type of abuse. I hope I managed to get my point across.

[darlingdaisyfarm]

what once was | Stanford Pines x reader

tags: sfw, memory loss, established relationship

a/n: this one was hard to write, not gonna lie. i even cried. thank u anon for this wonderful idea! Ford has always been such a complex character to write, but I tried to show his love, pain and his determination.

thank you for reading, i hope this breaks you as much as it broke me to write :,,,,,)

Stanley version

you wake up to the familiar weight of his hand resting gently on your arm, it’s warm and it brings a sense of. . . some kind of safety. as if you’ve felt it before, but. . . at the same time no. no, you don’t know why it’s so comforting.

you blink, trying to focus, but your head hurts like you’ve been hit by a truck. you rub your temples, wondering why it feels like your brain’s been shredded into pieces that won’t stick together.

your vision is blurry at first, but your gaze shifts to the man beside you. dark circles under his worried eyes that still got some hope in them.

Ford hasn’t gotten more than an hour of sleep in weeks.

“hey. hey, sweetheart. you’re okay.”

you analyse his face, feeling a slight sense of panic inside. “wait, who— who are you?”

Ford’s face drops, not in shock, but in something far more painful. you’ve asked him this question before. you’ve asked it every single morning since the accident. and every morning, the answer is the same.

“it’s. . . it’s me, darling. Ford. your husband.”

your husband, he names himself. . . you wish you could make sense of the emotions in your chest right now, but you can’t, because you don’t understand, you can’t remember, nothing’s connecting. nothing makes sense and everything feels so wrong.

Ford cant stand the silence. “y-you don’t remember, do you?” please just tell him you do—

“no. . .”

his lips press together and he looks down, but he’s not mad, not angry. no, Ford’s never angry, not at you.

“i— i’m sorry,” you mumble with guilt in ur voice. “i really don’t remember, i’m sorry.”

Ford shakes his head, running a hand through his hair, trying to control the storm of emotions inside of him. he’s trying so damn hard to stay calm and not burst into tears right in front of you. “don’t— don’t apologize, it’s not your fault. none of this is your fault.”

you continue to look around, trying to find at least one thing in the room which could be familiar to you.

“w-we’ve been through this a thousand times, love,” Ford explains and looks away, focusing on the empty space in front of him. "i know this isn’t easy for you. for us. but i’m not going anywhere, we’ll figure this out. i’ll— i’ll fix it. i’ll find a way to bring your memories back. i promise."

“how long?” you ask. “how long have we been. . . married?” it’s so weird to even pronounce the last word.

“seven years, my love.”

***

Ford holds it together for you. he always does.

every morning, he wakes up before you. sits at the edge of the bed, rubs the sleep from his eyes and prepares to tell you who he is.

who you are.

he’s a scientist, logic is his shield and his weapon. he throws himself into his work, searching for something that could help.

he’s got sketches pinned to the walls, equations scattered across the desk. an entire board dedicated to explore how human’s psyche and mind works.

he's been up countless nights, fiddling with wires and strange gadgets, all while researching any possible way to bring you back to him. every book, every article, every experiment. even though he’s exhausted, theres still light in his eyes that never fades, a fire in him too. a stubborn determination to make things right, no matter what.

you catch him once, sitting at that desk with head in his hands, probably tired as fuck.

“hey. . .” you forgot his name again, damn.

Ford’s head snaps up immediately when he hears you because he hopes you came to tell him “honey, i remembered! i remembered we are married!”. you see the redness in his eyes, from tears or lack of sleep, youre not sure. he scrubs a hand across his face, trying to pull himself together.

Ford looks at you, waiting you to continue, waiting to hear these cherished magical words. but you stand here all silent and confused.

“you should be asleep, honey,” he finally tells you, realising you won’t continue.

“so should you,” you say softly, stepping closer.

when you reach out to touch his arm, he shudders.

“i can’t, i can’t lose you. not like this. i need to work.”

***

but there’s always another plan. the one he doesn’t tell you about.

Bill.

and Ford is not proud of it.

he knows it’s a dangerous path, one that’s led him to dark places he never wanted to go. but the temptation is too strong. the idea of reaching out, of making that deal to bring your memories back. . . if only for a moment, if only for a chance to see you smile at him like you once did. Ford has considered it, weighed the consequences, overthought it.

but each time, he’s pulled himself back. he can’t go down that road again. he won’t.

still, this idea stays in his mind. because every hour of research, every failed experiment, every sleepless night feeds that urge, a feeling that maybe the price will be worth it. just shake his hand and—

but he’s trying so hard to fight it because he can’t bring himself to make that choice, no matter how broken he feels inside. he won’t drag himself into that nightmare again, no matter how much his soul hurts, no matter how badly he wants to see you smile at him.

right now, he just wants to hold you, to keep you close. to be the one you turn to. he doesn’t need a deal with Bill. he needs you. he needs you to remember him the way he remembers you.

***

another morning.

you’re lying there, your head pressed softly against the pillow, still struggling to make sense of everything, who you are, who he is, what this is, you feel a mix of confusion and fear.

his hand is resting gently on yours, as always, his fingers caressing your skin with a tenderness that feels. . . familiar again, but so far away. he’s looking at you, waiting. just waiting. sitting beside you, thinking, trying to come up with more ideas.

you flip through a page of his journal and one of his drawings seems funny to you, you smile as you point at it, asking, “hey, Ford, so what is that thing?”

Ford.

he looks at you in shock. he doesn’t move, doesn’t speak as if the wrong word might shatter this fragile moment he’s been waiting so long to happen.

his heart pounds in his chest.

“Ford. . .?” you ask again, worried why he got so silent. unsure if you should’ve said anything at all.

again, you say it, his fucking name, and it shatters him. because it’s not just the name. it’s that you remembered it. that piece of him, the one he’s been clinging to with everything he’s got, has finally stuck in your mind.

his eyes shimmer for the first time in all these months. his gaze falls to your lips, memorising the shape of the sound you just made.

“did— did you— did you just say my name?”

you nod slowly, unsure if you’ve done something wrong.

but you did exactly what he’s been waiting for, praying for.

his hands grip at his face, trying to control the flood of tears that he can’t hold back any longer

“you— say it again. please. say it again.”

you’re confused at the urgency in his voice, but still do as he asks you. “Ford. your name is Ford.”

his name. his name. from your lips, it’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever heard.

Ford’s hand comes up, trembling, to cup your cheek. he touches you like you’re something so delicate and the sight of him hurts. hurts because you don’t remember what it feels like to be in his arms, what it felt like when he used to kiss your forehead goodnight, when he used to make you laugh until you couldn’t breathe.

“oh god, my love—” he cant continue because he simply starts crying. Ford presses a hand over his mouth, as if he could stop it, but he can’t. he can’t. “you— you remembered. oh, darling, you—” he just shakes his head, unable to speak as he gasps for air between sobs.

you stare at him, all lost. “Ford, are you— are you okay?” no, he’s not, he’s damn not, because he spent every waking moment trying to fix what’s been broken, for you.

Ford smiles through his tears, not even bothering to wipe them away. “no— yes. i-i’m fine, i just—” another sob cuts him off and he laughs bitterly through it. “god, you don’t. . . you don’t know what this means. you don’t—”

it’s not the anger, not the frustration that has been building up for weeks. it’s relief. it’s all the grief he’s been carrying.

Ford leans forward, reaching out for your hands, but he hesitates, because he’s scared you might pull away. because too much emotions which Ford used to hide. but you don’t and he grips them tightly, clutching them, wide smile never leaving his face.

“it’s you,” he whispers. “it’s you. you’re still in there. i knew it. i knew it.”

his forehead drops to your knuckles, his glasses slipping, tears falling down. “i was so scared, my love,” he admits through sobs. “so scared i’d lost you forever. that i’d never hear you say my name again. that—”

he can’t finish the thought, can’t even say it aloud. it’s too much, too cruel.

“Ford, i—“

he looks up at you and his cheeks are streaked with tears, eyes red, swollen and wide with disbelief and love. so much love it hurts.

“you d-don’t have to remember everything,” he whispers, his voice trembling but so, so tender and soft. “you don’t. i’ll wait. i’ll wait as long as it takes. but this. . . this is enough for me. hearing you say my name, it’s enough, darling.”

you don’t know why, but his words make you want to cry, too.

you can’t find the words to comfort him. how do you comfort him when he’s the one who’s been holding it all together, for you, all this time?

“it’s okay. it’s okay, Ford.”

the words feel too small, but they’re all you can offer, as your hand brushes against his cheek.

and Ford, your lovely Ford, your husband, he melts into your touch, like an affectionate puppy. he doesn’t try to hide it. he doesn’t try to be strong.

“i’ve been trying so hard. . .” Ford remembers every sleepless night, every failure, every moment when he thought he might lose you forever.

he pulls you closer, burying his face in the crook of your neck, holding you. you hold him back, just as tight.

“thank you,” Ford whispers into your skin. “thank you for remembering me, darling, for remembering us.”

you don’t know how much you’ve given him, not yet. but you will understand it later, much later. when you’ll remember him again, completely, soon.

but for now, you just hug him back, feeling how his body shakes, how he clings to you and you promise him you’ll remember.

“I love you so much,” he murmurs, “i’ve always loved you, sweetheart. i just— just needed you to remember that.”

he’s not asking you to remember everything, to recall every detail, every moment. no. he just needs to know that you still remember him.

and you do.

you do.

[ozwriterchick]

Back to Us - Chapter 6

Summary: Y/n wakes after an accident to her Avengers team-mates. But something isn't quite right and only Steve and Tony can see it.

Characters/Relationships: Steve Rogers x Reader; Tony Stark; Natasha Romanoff; Other Avengers Characters

Content warnings: Mentions of an accident (no details yet); If I missed any, let me know

A/N: If you want to be tagged, let me know.

Not beta'd so any mistakes are my own. I don't write smut, but there are allusions to smut in my stories.

Back to Us Masterlist

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Word count: 1465 (approx.)

You and Steve settle into a routine over the next couple of weeks, where every other day you get together for some adult fun.  Each day you seem to be unlocking more and more memories.  You still have the feeling however, that some really important things are missing.

The only thing you’re concerned about is the amount of times you go looking for Steve and he’s not around.  Everyone you ask just tells you that he had to go because something came up.  Honestly, it worries you because you still have the girlfriend thing in the back of your mind, but you know he’s an important, busy guy so you just brush it off, certain if he had a girlfriend you would have known by now.

After about a week, you ask Tony to meet you in the lab so you can talk to both him and Bruce.

“What’s up, kiddo?” Tony asked.

“Well, I’ve started to get some memories back, and there seems to be a lot coming through.  Having said that, I feel like what you’re not telling me is that my memory gap is huge.  The amount of memories coming back is so large, that the timeframe has to also be huge, logically” You hope you’re articulating this well enough. “It’s not just days or weeks is it?”

“Well, no it isn’t Y/n” Bruce answered your question sympathetically.  “We didn’t want to tell you how long, the Doc suggested we don’t give you specifics as it might be too much of a shock.  However, now that you’re starting to regain some memories, maybe it’s time to tell you some things.”

“Y/n” Tony began. “The last memory you had in the hospital – the Romanian Hydra mission, that was 4 years ago.”

You sit down on the chair beside you as you let the words he’s just said sink in.  You can’t quite believe that he just said 4 years had passed since that mission to Romania.  “Are you serious?  How did I lose 4 years of memories?”

“Nobody can tell” Bruce started to explain. “The brain is a mysterious thing.  They don’t know why certain portions of time go missing and others don’t”

“Right.  Well, I think I need to take some time and go for a walk to help digest this new information.” You said slowly.  “I’ll be back later with, I’m sure, a gazillion more questions.”

Bruce and Tony nod as they silently watch you leave the building and head out into the garden of the compound and then calmly went back to their work.

About an hour later, Steve strides into the lab.  Looking around he seems to be searching for something.  “Hey, have you guys seen Y/n?”

“Yeah, she went out to the garden.  We just let her know how big the memory gap is.  We know you’re keen for her to remember, but just give her some space for now.  She is, quite justifiably, shocked at how long the memory gap is.” Tony went on to explain the earlier conversation further to Steve.

“I get it.  How was she when you told her?” Steve asked.

“Well, apart from the shock, she seemed to take it alright, considering she thought it was days/weeks, but she’d kind of pieced together that it was longer than that, given the depth of memories, she has already got back.” Bruce told Steve.  “She just said she needed some space and time to sort through it all in her head.”

On your return to the compound, you head towards the lab, intending to ask Tony & Bruce some more questions when you hear raised voices.  You realise it’s Tony, Bruce and Steve in the lab, they don’t sound like they’re arguing but there’s something going on.

You quietly let yourself in through the nearby door, to avoid interrupting them.  The voices become clearer and the only thing you hear sends chills through your body and mind. 

Your brain singles out Steve saying ���My fiancé” and the rest of your mind shuts down.  You don’t hear anything else.  You hadn’t realised until that moment that you were falling for him and to hear that he has a fiancé, while he’s been sleeping with you, makes you wonder what kind of guy he really is and how you could have misjudged him.  Now all those times he disappeared because “something came up” made sense.

You turn, stumbling but catch yourself before you actually fall and silently head back to your room to pack a bag.  You need some space from literally everything.

As you’re leaving your room you see Tony who is heading along the corridor towards you.

“Hey kiddo, where are you heading?” Tony asks, eyeing the bag in your hand.

“Oh, hey Tony, I was just coming to find you to let you know.  I’ve been thinking about everything I’ve heard this morning and I think I need a few days away to get my head around all that information.  So, I’m going to stay with a friend.  Someone none of you know so there’s no temptation for ANYONE to follow me” you tell him, you look at him pointedly, hoping he understands what you’re not saying.

“Listen Y/n, I know hearing that the gap is 4 years is hard to take and I get the need for some space.  We’ll all be here when you’ve got your head right and are ready to talk. Just… Don’t take too long ok? We’ll all miss you while you’re gone.”

“Thanks Tony.  Yeah, 4 years is way longer than I thought, but it’s not just that.  Look, I’ve gotta go, I need to go and I don’t want anyone seeing and trying to stop me.  Let everyone know I’ll be back when I’m ready.”

“All good.  The Quinjet is ready and will take you wherever you need to go. FRIDAY will wipe your destination coordinates once you get there so nobody is tempted to look it up in the flight log.” Tony assured you.  “Just stay in touch, even if it’s just with me, so I know you’re ok, ok?”

You hug Tony and say “Thanks old man”

“Hey, enough of the old alright, just call or text me when you’re ready to come back and I’ll send the jet for you.  No matter where you are.”

You race towards the plane before anyone can see you, jump aboard and give FRIDAY your destination info, ready to put everything behind you for at least the next few days.

Steve walks into the lounge just in time to see the Quinjet taking off.  He looks over at Tony who is looking a bit melancholy watching the jet take off and fly away.

“Hey Tony, who’s going where?  Is there a mission I don’t know about?” Steve asks.

“No Cap, Y/n is just heading off for a few days R&R.  She wanted to get going quickly so I told her to take the Quinjet, FRIDAY can pilot it back once it drops her off.”

Steve looks shocked.  “She never said anything. She didn’t even say goodbye to me.”

“She doesn’t remember that she should talk to you about decisions she makes about her life.  As far as she’s concerned, she doesn’t have to run anything by anyone.”

“But we’ve been getting closer, I thought we were starting to get somewhere with her and I.  I really need to talk to her Stark.  I need to make sure she’s ok.  Do you know where she’s going or should I ask FRIDAY?”

“Won’t do you any good Rogers.  I’ve told FRIDAY to wipe her coordinates once she gets where she’s going.  She specifically said she didn’t want to be disturbed by ANYONE!”

“Tony, anything could happen to her out there, she doesn’t remember anything from the last 4 years.  And what about Noah?”

“I can’t do much about that, but I’m not telling her about Noah and you aren’t either.  I’m pretty sure her memories are coming back and she’s just processing the bits as they come through.  She’ll remember you and she’ll remember Noah.  She’ll be back, she gave me no indication that she wouldn’t, she just said she needed to get her head around everything.

She’s gone through a lot in the last couple of weeks Cap and you of all people should understand how she’ll try and deal with it and what she needs.  And I can guarantee if you try and contact her when she’s expressly said she doesn’t want it, things will be worse.”

With that, Tony walked back towards his office, wanting to catch up on some paperwork as his mind wasn’t in the space for experiments or building equipment, leaving Steve to wonder if he would ever see you again.

Tag List: @wolfbeanpotion @vioplay19 @jason-todd-fangirl-14 @crazyunsexycool @zaraomarrogers @bitchy-bi-trash @mrsnikstan @harrysnovia

[asherashedwings]

Hey chat, remember when I did that one charting pattern analysis on Pico and Darnell?

Well I'm doing that again. But with EVERY FNF CHARACTER.

Girlfriend

Girlfriend, shocker, doesn't really have a pattern. This is mainly due to her being featured in only one song, and it's the tutorial. If we ever get any action from her in the future, then maybe we can find something then, but for now: no pattern.

Daddy Dearest & Mommy Mearest

Okay, so they do have a pattern, and it's a shared pattern. I mean, makes sense, since they're kind of a package duo. It's kinda hard for me to explain, but they have patterns that tend to focus on the left and right notes?? If that makes sense. Good examples I can think of are Satin Panties, High, and Cocoa. Mearest more so than Dearest, but Dearest's base charts are also rather simple due to his week being so early. BUT! These patterns are apparent in his Erect songs! Namely Bopeebo. But yeah, patterns that are left and right note focused. Which -- and I don't know if this is just a coincidence or not -- seems rather fitting given the colors of those notes: red and purple.

Spooky Kids

Another set of characters that don't really have a set pattern that I can distinguish. Although, I do find that rather fitting for them. Their lack of pattern matches their rather chaotic nature that's displayed in their show. They're just silly unpredictable guys.

Monster

Okay, so Monster is just already so different from everyone else that it's just hard to hold him to the same standard. But he does have his own patterns! Namely a LOT of hold notes. Which makes sense due to the lingering nature of his songs. He's slow and eerie, so of course his charting would reflect that

Pico

Okay, so I've covered Pico before. He does a lot of back and forth patterns. .... I could turn this into a super complex character analysis that is completely just my brainrot talking but I don't know if I should go there. I'm going there. Okay, so Pico's entire character in FNF revolves around him going back on the various jobs he's been given to protect Boyfriend and Girlfriend. Week 3? Backing out of his job to rap with BF instead. Week 7? Denying his mission yet again to save BF and GF. He's constantly going back and forth between his job and his morals. And it's not always clear which is the correct option. This same logic can also be applied to Weekend 1, except it's not him choosing BF and GF over his job -- it's him choosing them over his friends: Darnell and Nene. His character is just a constant cycle of back and forths.

Senpai

Okay, so this fucker was the reason I first wanted to make a full analysis on all the characters. So, this guy I noticed, uses a lot of trail notes. And in my brain it does tie into his character and. Like. The only way that I can explain it is like. You know those videos of people arguing with misogynists, and the misogynist keeps cutting off the other person before they can make their point, and keep repeating the same thing over and over again cuz they think that's how arguments work? That's the same vibe I get from Senpai's trail notes. It feels like he's just. Repeating the same things over and over again cuz he thinks he's making a point. And just going on and on so BF can’t speak Idk. If that makes sense.

Tankman

Tankman uses a lot of stairs. I had no idea what to make an analysis out of here, so to quote the wise words of @braveboiart ; "He's a bitch and I hate stairs." ACTUALLY! That is half right. Came up with this while replaying Week 7 for this post. Tankman is explicitly shown to be able to break the fourth wall, so it is entirely possible that in Ugh and Guns, he is purposefully using an egregious amount of stairs to just. Be a pain in the ass. This would also perfectly explain his switch up in Stress. He's taking BF and the player a little bit more seriously, so he starts to be a bit more genuine. Also, I would like to point out that he also uses back and forths a ton. Tankdad canon. ALSO I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE NOTE OF A LIL DETAIL I NOTICED WHEN PLAYING PICO ERECT

Pico Erect shares charting from Stress. Realistically, this is likely just a lil reference to Stress since Pico made in appearance in that song but FUCK YOU, TANKDAD CANON.

Darnell

Okay, so I've already gone in depth on Darnell, so this is mostly gonna be me repeating myself. Good to have everything in one place, yknow? Darnell has a progression of charting throughout Weekend 1. In Darnell, he starts out almost identical to Pico's charting, before slowly transition to his trail and double heavy charting through Lit Up and 2Hot. My analysis of this was the idea that he starts out the week mocking Pico; making fun of the fact that Pico chose to rap battle BF instead of killing him. But as the week progresses, he gets more into it and starts having fun with it, slipping into his own style.

And last but not least

Boyfriend

Okay, so, surprise surprise: Boyfriend doesn't really have a pattern. But it's not cuz he just repeats everyone! There's actually a lot of moments where he freestyles, namely in the Erect tracks. But when analyzing those bits, there isn't really any set pattern. Which makes sense! BF is a go with the flow kinda guy. The charting he uses depends on what the moment calls for; what will outshine his opponent the most. I mean, his charting kinda needs to be versatile, given the variety of his challengers. So yea.

Uhhh... Hope y'all enjoyed my analyses. I'm gonna go pass out now (It is 4:36am at the time of writing this rn)

[deuce-t-agere]

X-Men Evolution CG Steve Rogers and Regressor Logan

Very self indulgent caregiver Cap and age/pet regressor Wolvie bc they’re my favorite rare pair

Having better technology now Shield was able to use Logan’s healing factor to save Steve so he could come out of the ice finally, Logan was just as straight faced as usual but the little baby part of his brain was just an excited little puppy.

My Papa! My Papa! Papa come back!!

Before Steve was back Logan would go to museums sometimes when he was feeling small and spend time looking at the Captain America exhibits.

He has gotten into a few arguments with the poor museum staff when they say it’s unclear if Captain America was real or just a story.

Steve obviously didn’t fully understand what was happening when Logan regressed for the first time but Logan was his friend (lover if you want and I do want) so he was going to help him out as best he could.

It’s okay, Buddy. You’re okay. When Logan breaks down because being small crept up on him after a mission.

When he got back Steve was finally able to do proper research on Logan regressing, he isn’t quite sure if Logan age regresses or pet regressed or both.

Logan isn’t entirely sure either and doesn’t particularly care to try figuring it out.

Logan will hold on to Steve’s belt while he follows him around when it’s just the two of them. He still does it after Steve finally comes back. He doesn’t want anything or even always need to be going with Steve, he just wants to.

Steve will let Logan cuddle him when they slept, a lot of their missions were just the two of them so no one else would see, and now they have the privacy of a room in the mansion together and the X-Men are very understanding.

Logan will cling to Steve’s arm or lay on his chest when they sleep together, it takes some getting used to when Steve gets back because Logan is much heavier now.

Steve tries to be cautious about how much praise he gives Logan so he doesn’t over whelm him.

Lots of Good boy, Logan. And tussling his hair when he does little things well to build up his confidence.

After Steve comes back Logan takes a long time to tell him about what he remembers of Weapon X, Steve just holds him when he does and assures him that none of it was his fault.

Steve will take Logan to baseball games, Logan spends the whole time asking for snacks and enjoying all the fun smells instead of watching the game, but then still insists he wants Steve to teach him how to play.

Steve does try to teach Logan how to play baseball every so often, it always turns into a game of fetch because Logan would rather chase the ball than try to hit or catch it.

Papa, throw again? Sure, Buddy, but I need the ball back first. No! Mine!

Logan likes to bite a lot, Steve has gotten quite a few sizable marks on his arms from it.

Thanks to the serum Steve can carry Logan about as easily as a regular guy his size could carry an average person.

Logan isn’t sure how he feels about being carried, but it is kind of nice for Steve to carry him to bed when he’s sleepy.

Steve likes taking Logan to museums, usually they won’t go to any that involve war history, Steve doesn’t want to accidentally trigger anything. But sometimes Logan likes to go and tell Steve things that got wrong about certain wars he fought in if he’s feeling a bit older than usual.

That is not how it happened. It was actually- and Steve just listens, having no idea if it actually is more accurate or if Logan is exaggerating.

Rising acceptance of LGBTQ was great for them because fewer people cared if they held hands while going for walks (and cause they deserve to kiss) So Steve can actually hold on to Logan when they go on nature walks now.

Logan once barked at and bit a guy who yelled at them for holding hands. Steve had to explain to Logan that it was great that he was standing up for them but he can’t bite people.

He was mean! It’s still not nice to bite, Pal. He was mean, Papa!

Steve can’t exactly argue with the logic, biting isn’t the best way to go, but that man was indeed mean first and did deserve it.

[seperis]

dear tumblr

This is hard for me to say.

I think I--and all of us--need to apologize to you, tumblr.  Yes, this is a hellsite, every possible design choice made is counter-intuitive to the aesthetics and logical processes of the brain of pretty much any humans, not just those who you cloned to get their skin that I assume you are wearing when you came to our planet for whatever shit aliens do and wanted to blend.

You are a dumpster fire, yes, but over the years, we were warmed by that fire or Stockholmed into thinking we were which is basically the same thing. We could leave--I mean, logically, I know that’s possible--but we don’t.  Yeah, I got nothing, I can see the doors but I can’t seem to get to them.

Anyway, we were hostile. We did not defend you when other social media sites made fun of you.  Which may explain those design choices, now that I think about it.  Yes, you did set an ai bot to catch porn and thought we got off to sexy geometic shapes like triangles, but looking back, that was kind of charming and the memes were amazing. You’re still here--I genuinely do not know how you managed--and we still come here and are reassured to see you are still very weird but now sometimes there are crabs and bells. I don’t think you actively hate your users, either, you just don’t understand people or sentient beings, so maybe you’re just bad at showing affection and are super passive-aggressive. 

Look, I”m saying you may be a hellsite but you are our hellsite and I don’t think we tell you that enough.

And right now, there is a fair to good chance that in the vast landscape of the giants of social media, you will be the last one standing and seriously, what the fuck?  This was not on my bingo card in this or any alternative universe. You did it by dint of not actively hating your users and publicly picking fights with them then taunting them when they rebelled, engaging in random acts of self-mutilation of your infrastructure for lols or being elon musk. I mean, that’s a pretty fucking low bar, come think, and honestly, it shouldn’t be that hard to clear it, but you’re pretty much the only one who did.

I say this with total sincerity and a sense that reality is crumbling around me: congratulations. I think you are going to win the social media wars.  I mean, yeah, you could disappear like tomorrow--I actually kind of expect that daily--but you will be the only one we won’t actively hate so yeah, you still win.  I am going to drink--quite a bit maybe forever--in your honor.

Hugs and kisses,

seperis

[dearweirdme]

Whoops I feel like I invited a bunch of nasties through my coworker ask 🫠

Hi anon!

😂... Oh, your summoning worked alright! I don't think you need three guesses to know who went and send me a long essay again while I was asleep.

Rest assured... they are not disappointed with you: You know I am not even disappointed at your anon for writing this but I am disappointed at you for posting this because at your age you should know better. At your age, you should know that none of these things that this obviously ignorant anon has written is how real relationships work and me mentioning your age isn’t me insulting you cuz it is a blessing to see 40 but after being alive for over 4 decades, it is kind of disappointing that you know little to nothing about life.

I guess a sense of humor isn't one of their personality traits. They proceeded going into detail why those takes are wrong 🙄.

Then they literally broke my mind! I did not want to post their ask (because jawn boring for the most part and also.. again trying to use my platform whilst being rude to me), but this just totally fried my brain... remember, this is a Jkkr talking!

It’s kind of funny to me that you are the one who is always yapping about the korean culture and what that means for queer people whenever anons on ur blog bring up certain moments which didn’t make sense with taekook. You talk about the the dangers queer people are in and how they feel a need to protect themselves and yada yada yada yet you think that these same people while being in public, in the midst of thousands of fans and cameras like at the Harry styles concert or Yoongi’s concert in korea, would openly display their affection towards each other by holding each other while singing romantic songs, sticking close to each other, wispering to each other and all. So are these queer people not afraid of how they may come across to the thousands of fans who are focused on them then? When people complained about that awkward hug that taekook shared on Jin’s discharge, didn’t you start with your long speech about the korean culture and queer people and how taekook had to be cautious because they knew they were being filmed? So they only had to be cautious then but then openly show their affection to each other by touching each other, hugging each other, whispering to each other while they are at crowded concerts with koreans? The same koreans? Rain, you are short sighted as hell. Besides, the way your anon describes the way they think Jk treated Jimin at that concert shows how ignorant they are because in the real world, people don’t feel the need to stick to their partners like that all the time and they definitely wouldn’t ignore their friends or coworkers just because their partner is there. That is a very childish way of looking at things and if you were honest with urself and applied the logic of how you think the korean culture affects how queer people in relationships behave with each other in public settings, then maybe, just maybe you would understand why Jk was all cozy with Tae at Harry Styles concert but it was Jimin whom he spent all his time with in private and maybe you would also see how your own words about queer people in korea go against taekook. Y’all must think this is some drama or something where those who are in love can’t keep their hands of each other IN PUBLIC. The way Jk behaves with Taehyung in public shows more than anything that those two don’t have anything to hide or would you say they can be that way in public but have to lie about not being with each other at certain moments because they have to hide their relationship?

Had this come from a neutral perspective and asking for my thoughts on this.. I'd been happy to explain (and it's honestly not that complicated), but imagine a Jkkr saying this to a Tkkr. A Jkkr who then later goes on to do what they always do...

I also don’t see you or any of your anons asking why during HS concert, Jimin and Jungkook “disappeared” together for almost 20 minutes.

Now who wants to take on bets as to whether they meant Jk and Jm were going to actually use the toilets... or -insert sexual behavior-...

So yeah... thanks for letting me rant again 😂. I'm not going to be posting Jkkrs for a while. Back to Tkk pics it is.

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

🩸🩸🩸🩸

⚡⚡⚡⚡

🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨

💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐

➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰➰

🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺🐕‍🦺

🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼

LOVE YOUR WRITING

THANK YOU!!!!

12 for 🩸:

---

Eddie can’t breathe.

He feels like he used to before he’d have a big, catastrophic panic attack. Like the world is spinning too fast around him and he’s about to overheat to a critical boiling point. 

“What does this mean, Eddie?” Maddie demands. “What is my brother doing?”

Eddie can’t move.

How does he know? How did he figure it out? Eddie was careful. He was so careful.

“Eddie?”

---

12 for ⚡:

---

Buck nods. “Okay. Right.”

Eddie smiles encouragingly, glad Buck can at least be plied with logic. If he won’t listen to Eddie, at least he’ll listen to Hen.

“So we just need to find somewhere that can accommodate the people first,” Bobby says. “And we have a solution for the food if all else fails.”

“We need to find it in three days,” Buck says. “Two, really.”

“Well, then let’s stop panicking and figure it out,” Hen instructs.

Buck nods compliantly. 

What the hell?

---

18 for 🧟:

---

They did…

Maddie twists to face Chris, wincing at the pain in her ribs. 

“Chris,” she says. “I totally get why you’re mad and upset. When my brother was your age, he got bit by a really big, scary dog and felt the exact same way you did.”

“A dog?” Chris sniffs. 

“Yep! It was like a husky crossed with something, and it was sort of crazy. Our neighbors bought it from a farm,” Maddie continues. “It was always barking. My dad hated it.”

Eddie would hate it, too. Though, he is a little confused where this is going. 

“The dog bit Evan,” Maddie continues. “It hopped the fence when we were walking to school. He was so mad, just like you are right now.”

“That’s scary,” Chris says. 

“It was,” Maddie agrees. “But you know what I told Evan?”

“What?” Chris asks. 

“I told him I felt bad for the dog,” Maddie explains. “Because it didn’t have anyone properly taking care of it and making it feel safe. Just like those lions. They used to live on a preserve where people made sure they were fed and healthy. Now their protectors are gone.”

---

18 for 🚨:

---

Buck takes a deep breath. He can do that. He thinks he can keep doing that. 

“Thank you, Bobby,” he says. “I really appreciate it. Uh, appreciate you, I mean.”

Bobby smiles at him. Kind and warm and full of understanding. 

“Anytime.”

v.

Chris comes home mid-summer. 

Eddie feels like a dislocated limb that’s been reset. His son is home. Things are right again. He wonders now, if the years of his twenties spent bouncing around, listless, were a result of that estrangement. Like despite his obliviousness, a part of him still knew and lacked and needed his child. It hurts his brain and his chest just to think about it. 

Chris seems happy to be home, too. Like Buck said, he never thought he was being abandoned or passed on. He missed them, and he wanted to be back, and some days he complained and gave Karen grief, but overall, he trusted they’d bring him home as soon as they could. 

Chim stays longer than Hen. Eddie is a little unsure of why. Yes, he doesn’t have little kids to get home to. But he talks all the time about how much he misses Maddie. Eddie isn’t sure why he doesn’t just go home when Hen does. At any rate, it takes him nearly a month after Hen leaves to finally feel safe enough to head back and be with his very pregnant girlfriend.

As summer comes to an end, wildfires break out across the country. Namely, Texas.

---

39 for 💐:

---

“I think I'd prefer doing anything with you than competing in classes.”

“Really?” May asks, voice a little breathy. An effect she didn’t intend for. “Because you’re pretty good at that.”

“What can I say?” April shrugs. “I was inspired.

May feels a sort of anticipation she’s never experienced before. Like something is going to happen and she doesn’t quite know what, but regardless, she’s desperate for it. Like the moment at the end of a drumroll, right before the big reveal. There’s a delicious sort of tension. One she can’t say she’s experienced before. With Darius, with every other guy she’s ever been out with, it felt like following a script. Everything felt like choreographed steps. This isn't that. This is like a story that she can’t put down. 

Maybe she’s just tipsy. Maybe she’s overreacting. Maybe Buck and Hen got her overexcited. Maybe she shouldn’t read into this at all.

Or maybe it’s a pretty big sign. 

Maybe May should let this anticipation guide her, just for right now, and see what happens. 

“I, uh…” May struggles to know what to say. She steps closer to April. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking these past few days.”

April nods, eyes sweeping over May’s face. She’s about two inches shorter than May, but stands with a sort of confidence that makes her seem tall.

“Maybe you should think a little bit less,” she whispers. Her eyes land on May’s lips.

Oh.

Well, sure. Okay. 

May’s brain can shut up for a second.

April closes the remaining distance between them, stands on her toes a little, and tilts her head up to kiss May. May thinks she knows what to expect, but she’s wrong. She thinks, lips are lips. It’s not true.

---

39 for ➰:

---

Buck wakes up at eight in the morning, right on the dot. It’s a small thing to notice, but he does. There’s a digital clock on the nightstand beside the big, king-sized hotel room bed, and the time is staring him in the face when he opens his eyes. Bold, square red letters. 8:00. 

Is it a little sad to say he congratulates himself on sleeping in?

As a teenager, and early in his twenties, Buck would have no problem letting the morning breeze by in a hazy sleep. He’d struggled, joining the SEALS, with the early wake up calls. Hated it. Hated waking up for something he didn’t like. Firefighting had sharpened him. Instead of being forced to wake up for something he was ill suited for, he chose to rise early for something he loved. And so his body retrained itself. He found it hard to make it to seven most days now. Even harder to stay lazy in bed once he was awake. 

Today, though? Today Buck has a reason to linger. 

He rolls over in bed, away from the bright red digital clock face, to where Eddie is still sleeping, arm slung over Buck’s waist. Facing him, Buck presses a kiss to his forehead. Eddie’s eyes flutter open. Two pools of sun-melted gold. 

“Good morning,” Buck whispers.

Eddie smiles. “Good morning, handsome.”

Buck feels his cheeks warm a little. That never gets old. How does that never get old? It’s like he’s hearing it for the very first time. 

“How did you sleep?” Buck asks. 

He’s keeping his voice low. They got adjoining hotel rooms for this mini-vacation they took up to Morro Bay. Christopher is still asleep on the other side of the connecting doors. 

Eddie blinks, like the question throws him for a loop. Then, his expression rights itself. 

“Good,” he answers. “Good. I always sleep well beside you. You know that.”

---

78 for 🦮:

---

He feels like the trust Eddie has put in him, in less than two years of knowing each other, has changed him. Fundamentally, it has changed him. 

“You don’t need to say anything. Just know that I trust you, and I know you handled today as best you could.” 

Buck exhales a bit shakily. 

“This whole time I haven’t missed you as much as I do right now,” Buck says. “I really wish you were here.”

“Me too.”  Eddie says gently. 

“Thank you.”

“For what?” 

“For everything, Eddie.”

“You’re the one doing everything for me. And my kid. Who, once again, almost murdered your dog.”

“Okay, well I don’t think she was going to die. I think I was just panicking.”

“Still.” 

Buck smiles crookedly. 

“Yeah, well… You know I’d do anything for both of you. Impending criminal poisoning charges aside.”

“I know. I do know that.” 

That night, Buck finds himself a little teary after he and Eddie hang up. Living in lockdown with Chris and Cranberry, adjusting to the new routine, might be getting easier. Apart from today, that is. But not seeing Eddie? Time doesn’t make that easier at all. 

x.

Cranberry heals just fine. In under a week, she’s back to her regular self. She bounces back quicker than Christopher, actually, whose guilt keeps him hesitant around her for days and days after the Tylenol incident. Buck has to encourage him tons. Once Cranberry is feeling fully better, her usual energy and affection help, too. It takes time, but they manage to put the whole thing behind them. 

They get Cranberry’s Intermediate Trick Dog title. Making her Tweed River’s Vodka Cranberry TKI. Basically a Master’s degree, if you ask Buck. He’s working on the next level - Advanced. Gotta get his girl her PhD. Eddie says he’s ridiculous for calling it that. Hen, in med school, says it’s insulting. Buck’s definitely not planning on stopping showering Cranberry with accolades any time soon. 

It’s summer. The heat is sweltering most of the day and it’s hard to train outside or even take Cranberry on decent walks if it’s not night or early morning. Training the more advanced tricks is coming along. Just slower. Which is how Buck finds himself outside before seven in the morning, working on position commands from a distance. Christopher neglected to join him in favor of sleep. Typical not-quite-preteen. 

It’s morning. It’s quiet. It’s relatively mild out. Buck feels at peace, working with his best girl. 

And then his phone rings. 

This is weird for the time. The fact that it’s not a workday. The fact that no text preceded it. Buck’s first thought is to worry that something must have happened to Maddie and her baby. Or that someone has Covid. Either way, he’s assuming he’s getting a call from the hospital. 

When he checks the caller ID, he sees it’s Eddie. Which is actually not comforting, because Eddie FaceTimes him. He always FaceTimes him. And not usually at this time of day. 

“Eddie?” Buck answers the call a little frantically. Okay, a lot frantically, clearly, because Cranberry races over to check on him. “What’s wrong?”

“What? Nothing’s wrong?” 

“Nothing? Then why are you calling me at quarter to seven in the morning on a Sunday?”

Eddie chuckles. “Well, you’re awake, aren’t you?”

“Yes, obviously.”

---

78 for 🔼:

---

“But, please. You don’t have to go out of your way to be nice to me. You don’t have to ask how I am. It’s really okay if you hate me.”

He gawks at her.

“Shannon, I-I don’t hate you!”

She gives him a dubious look.

“Really!” He protests. “First of all, I’m pretty bad at hating people. There’s, like, one person I really hate, and he’s dead anyway.”

Shannon remembers, suddenly, visiting Eddie in the hospital after his other friend had been stabbed. The person who had done it was Buck’s brother-in-law. His sister’s husband. Who she was trying to make her ex-husband. 

Right.

He has real villains to hate. Even dead ones. 

“Second of all!” Buck continues. “I don’t even know you!”

“You don’t,” she agrees quietly. 

“Third! Uh, third of all… You’re pretty important to some people I care about, so… Yeah.” Buck sighs. “I don’t know. I might not get your choices. But Eddie has made it pretty clear it’s not all your fault. It’s not my business, anyway.”

No. It isn’t. And yet, here he is anyway. The only person really talking to her right now, even if just in a physiotherapist’s waiting room. 

“Sorry,” she mutters. “I shouldn’t have assumed how you feel.”

“No,” he shrugs. “It’s fair. Honestly? When Eddie first said you weren’t around? I did judge you. But that’s a lot to do with my own shit, too.”

She tilts her head, curious.

“Your own shit?”

She shouldn’t ask. She really shouldn’t. And he shouldn’t answer. 

But he does.

“Yeah, my relationship with my parents is more or less nonexistent,” Buck explains. “They didn’t even come to visit when a fire engine fell on me. Called my sister to wish me well.” 

“I’m sorry,” Shannon says. “That doesn’t sound easy.”

He shrugs. Like it is what it is. Like it’s just life, and not their failure. God. She hopes when Chris is his age, he never feels that way about his relationship with her. No matter what state it’s in, she hopes he knows. She loves her son more than anything, even if she’s not always good at loving him.

“I don’t hate you,” Buck says again. “I swear.”

“Okay,” she says. Her eyes start to sting. “Thanks.”

Fuck.

It shouldn’t matter what this guy thinks of her. She doesn’t know him, either. He’s Eddie’s friend, not hers. But maybe there’s something to be said about the fact that Christopher thinks he hung the moon. Maybe there’s wisdom in the goodness she senses from him. Maybe caring isn’t so stupid. 

The threat of tears in her eyes becomes a reality. Face hot with embarrassment, Shannon wipes her eyes. 

“Sorry,” she mumbles. “I’m totally freaking out on you.”

“That’s okay,” he says. “Don’t worry about it, really.”

[thecrescentmind]

I have decided to use this blog for general SaSi content along with ocs because reasons, will tag accordingly (TCM au posts will use the tags they’ve been using) so uh sanders sides swap au that’s been rotating in my brain for a while

No one swaps what they represent but they swap roles in the story more or less

Patton swaps with Janus, Roman swaps with Remus, and Logan swaps with an orange side I made up. Virgil is now the protagonist instead of c!Thomas but Thomas doesn’t really take Virgil’s role, I will explain how that works. (Under the cut cause this got very long)

This takes place in a universe where c!Thomas’ life went differently in a variety of ways that led his perception of what parts of him are good and what parts are bad to change very rapidly. I’m not sure how everything ended up the way it did exactly and in case I do end up doing things with this au I’m not going to reveal what I do have decided just yet. (I will say Thomas was unable to pursue his passions here and has a corporate job he hates which is kind of relevant) But whatever happened differently led to the worse parts of the canon light sides being emphasized and the better parts of the canon dark sides being emphasized. Eventually leading them to trade places in terms of how Thomas viewed them.

Sel (Janus. short for self perseverance or selfishness), Ideas (Remus), and Defense (Orange, he’s anger in this au btw) are aware of this, they know they weren’t meant to be in the positions they are, at least not like this. All of them are secretly terrified of losing the positions they’re in. Feelings (Patton), Pride (Roman), and Logic (you know who this is) are also aware of this, and it infuriates them. They were supposed to help Thomas, they want to help Thomas. They just want what’s best for him but for some reason he can’t see that. If they have to push things farther to get things how they should be then so be it.

Caution (Virgil) is a new side, the first they’ve had since Thomas was a kid/teen, he just got here and knows nothing about how things got the way they did. He decides to record his journey to find his place as a part of Thomas, and these vlogs are (for the most part) the pov we would see from.

This au has a bigger emphasis on the mindscape, it’s bigger and more complicated cause I thought it would be cool idk. Specifically it’s part of how Janus keeps the sides he wants repressed hidden. There are parts of the mindscape said to be unsafe that no one’s supposed to go into, Thomas doesn’t know why and when Caution shows up, neither does he. Thomas decides to sneak in one day (he’s more reckless here plus the idea of the supposedly dangerous and scary part of the mindscape always intrigued him) with Caution tagging behind him because if he can’t stop Thomas from acting like a dumb horror movie protagonist he might as well go with him to keep him safe.

What they find is actually a lot calmer than what they expected, maybe even less chaotic than what the rest of the mindscape can be at times. It’s nice but it almost seems fake, too perfect to be real. They look around until they. hear. something. Virgil gets them out of there before either of them can see if the ominous voice in the allegedly unsafe part of the mind is actually dangerous and upon returning get lectured by Janus. Virgil asks wtf that voice might’ve been, Janus says (lying) that he isn’t sure, maybe a monster, an illusion, nothing good that’s for sure. They walk away but Virgil stays by the entrance just a second longer than Thomas and Janus, for a second he sees something try to exit before being forced back inside.

It didn’t look like a monster or an illusion or whatever Janus said was in there though, it looked like another side. Of course the embodiment of anxiety overthinks this so eventually he decides to sneak back in there alone.

And then nothing bad happened to any of them ever (lie)

[thezombieprostitute]

Tutoring

A/N: Written for @the-slumberparty​ this is my fourth entry for the Bingo card combining “college AU” and “bodyguard AU” (though I’m kinda cheesing it on the “college AU” part). Reader has no physical descriptions.

Warnings: School stress, implied kidnapping. This story is about 1700 words!

“Hi there, you must be Peter. I’m Y/N and I’ll be your literature tutor.” You shake the hand of the young man in front of you. He seemed so small but that was likely a combination of his seemingly shy nature and his giant bodyguard next to him. You’d been warned before agreeing to tutor Peter that his father, Tony Stark, was quite protective of him and he’d have a security detail. Your only requirement was that the bodyguard did not interfere with the tutoring. 

“Hi Y/N,” Peter shook your hand back, “thanks, again, for agreeing to this. I really have no idea what I’m doing with literature. I’m more of a math and science brain. Oh, and this is my bodyguard for the day, Ari.”

“Nice to meet you, too, Ari,” you extend your hand. He quickly shakes your hand, completely covering yours with his, before getting back into lookout mode. “And I understand what you mean, Peter. Today is going to be a sort of Session Zero, where we talk out your assignments, possible ideas and goals, and make sure we can actually work well together. Sound good?”

He nods ascent and you guide him to the library’s study room you had reserved. You’re glad he agreed to meet at your university’s library, you had some friends here who would look out for you and knew your signals if you needed a call for help. Tutoring was great practice for your education degree and the money was good enough but you knew to make safety a priority. 

The two of you get settled in the study room while Ari sets himself up a chair that puts himself between Peter and the door. He’s so massive you’re glad you reserved one of the larger study rooms. You’re definitely not worried about him interrupting the tutoring; he’s very much all business.

Your session with Peter goes very well. You work out a way to get his math and science interests integrated into the literature project with Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. 

“Why that one,” Peter asks.

“Fun fact, Lewis Carroll’s writings are still studied by Logicians. It’s not just word play or fantastical things in this book, there’s also plays on logic and mathematical references.”

Peter’s eyes go wide, “you’re kidding me!”

“Nope, and I think that you can do this project, literature analysis, whatever you want to call it, by looking at Alice’s Adventures through the lens of a mathematician or logician. Just please, please, please make sure to talk to your teacher about this. I’d hate for us to get almost done with everything only for them to say, ‘that’s not what I wanted.’ Okay?”

“Yeah, that makes sense. Okay, I’ll make sure to ask her at class on Monday.”

“And if she doesn’t give you a response right away, please do email her. Get some kind of paper trail going so she can’t say you never got hold of her. I’ve had bad experiences like this before.”

“Sure thing!” 

“I think this was a very successful Session Zero, Peter. What say we do this again next week?” Peter nods enthusiastically as you both pack up your things. “And thank you, Ari. I’ve had people promise to not interfere with sessions only to end up being nothing but an annoyance.” He nods and gives you a smile so charming you feel yourself almost melting.

Next week’s session you meet up with Peter at the study room but he’s not with Ari. 

“Hi Y/N! This is another of my bodyguards, James,” Peter is quick to explain. “Security detail gets switched up every now and then.”

You stand up and go to shake James’s hand, “well, as long as you also agree to not interrupt today’s session, we should get along just fine.” James nods his head and returns your handshake before moving between Peter and the door. He’s big and tall like Ari, but with short hair and light stubble where Ari had longer hair and full beard. James doesn’t take a seat and just stands there, seemingly not looking at anything. You look back and forth between him and Peter with a confused expression and Peter whispers, “he’s kinda hardcore on protection. Doesn’t believe in sitting while on duty.” You nod as though you understand but you can’t imagine opting to stand all day when chairs are available.

“Well, let’s get to it then,” you smile at Peter. “Did you get approval from your teacher on this?”

“She said she’d have to get back to me so I followed your advice and emailed her. Just to be safe.”

“Good call. So, where would you like to begin today’s session?”

After some time of discussing various passages that Peter had problems with he sighed and said, “I sometimes feel like I’m just not meant to understand literature. I tried reading things like The Hobbit, a kids book, and I couldn’t even get into it.”

“Neither could I the first several times I tried to read it,” you confessed. Out of the corner of your eye you could swear you saw James fidget. “And it took me a really long time to figure out why. It was Tolkien’s style of world-building.”

“Yeah,” Peter began, “like taking five pages to describe a door, right?”

“Actually, no.” Again, your attention is drawn to movement from where James is standing, but you continue with Peter. “You see, part of Tolkien’s world-building is including names, poems and songs ‘of old’ that are meant to tell the reader ‘this is an old world with lore and history.’ But for readers like me, and possibly you, it felt like I was starting a series with the fourth book and I had missed out on some required reading. I felt as though the names were people I was supposed to already know. It wasn’t until I read The Silmarillion that things really started to fall in place for me.”

“That makes a lot of sense,” Peter commented. “A lot of times literature feels like I’m missing pieces of the puzzle for the story to make sense, for me to see why it’s such a ‘classic’ or why it’s important.”

“Something to consider, if you’re up for it, is learning about the time period the book was written in. Not when it’s set in, because those aren’t always the same, but when it was written. It can really help explain a lot of those ‘this doesn’t make sense’ details.”

“It still feels like a lot of work to just understand a book,” Peter complains.

“But you’re not just understanding a book,” you reply. “You’re understanding a culture.”

Your discussion went on like that for the rest of the session, with no further movement from James’s section of the room.

The next session Peter showed up with yet another bodyguard. He looked apologetic when he told you, “this is Lloyd. He’s today’s security detail.”

“Nice to meet you, Cupcake,” Lloyd pulled you closer to him as he shook your hand. “I’ve heard nothing but good things from the other guys.” 

You try to back away from him. Between his handlebar mustache, aggressive body language and overpriced cologne, you knew he wasn’t going to make today’s session easy.

“Hello Lloyd,” you reply curtly. “Just to make sure, you are aware of the conditions for allowing you to sit with us for the tutoring session, yes?”

“I’m aware,” his smile grows, showing his teeth, “and I promise to try to abide. But it’s not my fault if I end up finding you distracting.” You give him an incredulous look and respond, “yes, yes it is. But if you become too much of a distraction you will have to stand outside the room or you’ll have to explain to Mr. Stark why today’s session got canceled.”

“Ooo, so bossy,” he leered. “I like ‘em bossy.” You roll your eyes and try to get the session started. 

It isn’t long until the small study room is full of Lloyd’s cologne and giving you a headache. Your mood is worsened by Lloyd’s constant fidgeting and frequent derisive noises and comments. You’re very tempted to cancel the session but Peter’s such a  good student and you want to do right by him. 

“So have you heard back from your teacher about this?”

“Yeah, finally got an email response saying she’s going to have to see a rough draft before she’ll approve.”

“A full rough draft? Not an outline or summary,” you ask. “That’s a lot of work and a ton of time you’ll never get back if she says no to this.”

“You could just bitch slap her into accepting,” Lloyd interjects. “Bitch slapping bitches always works.” Peter winces at his words and that’s the last straw for you. 

“So you’re saying it would work on you?” You do not hold back on your glare and the comment seems to catch him off guard.

“I’m no bitch.”

“Then why are you acting like a needy bitch boy who’s not getting enough attention? You were allowed here with the understanding that you do not interfere. And yet you’ve done nothing but annoy, distract and deride. So either you sit still, shut up and do your job or I slap you and see if your bitch slap theory holds.”

Both men look taken aback at your anger but you don’t stop staring down Lloyd until looks away with a “yes, ma’am.” You turn back to Peter, smile, and continue to talk out how to handle his teacher while working on the project. 

As the weeks go by you’re grateful to never see Lloyd again. Peter alternates between Ari and James for the rest of your sessions and, when it’s finally time, you’re almost sad to say goodbye to the kid. Ari even gives you a giant smile and says he owes you one. Apparently your session with Lloyd was the last straw and they were finally able to get him fired. You were happy to help and only one bad session out of a semester’s worth of tutoring was your best record thus far. Now you could focus on your own finals, you were just a couple weeks away from getting your degree and wanted to finish strong. 

You were so caught up in finals stress that you didn’t notice someone following you until you were grabbed with a rag pressed into your face. The smell is strong and you find yourself passing out quickly. The last thing your brain registers is the too strong stench of overpriced cologne and someone whispering the word, “bitch” into your ear.

[planet-crait]

Episode 9! I think it’s 9. (Edit it’s episode 10) I’m getting confused lolz. How about this the episode I’m watching is called Weird Science. This review tested the limits of my patience with how much tumblr ate it. Forgive me if things are out of order I did my best.

Hazel draws that face criminally quick and I also have to wonder if that buck tooth is another Timmy reference. I’m going to pretend it is.

Either way this seems to be a science project of some sort though I didn’t think you could turn a potato into a light bulb unless I am misidentifying the item Hazel is using.

(Fuck tumblr for eating like half of my post I hate this. I’m sorry if this are out of order or it seems I missed stuff I just. I did the best I could this is so frustrating.)

Okay so I googled it and there is definitely more Hazel needs to do with her potato for it to actually work.

Cosmo how do you not know what a lightbulb looks like??? I’m majorly concerned. Uh wait how does Cosmo know how lightbulbs taste like? Wanda that is so mean. Cosmo!

But oh. Oh I cannot imagine the pressure of trying to follow the footsteps of a sibling who won every year that sounds brutal. I went to the same school as my older sister I looked exactly like and got a lot of the same teachers and that was hell. She’s going to a different school at least but uh. Still a lot of pressure.

Wait wait wait why did you wait til the last minute to do this project if it’s so important? I thought Hazel cared about school so this seems weird to me for her to procrastinate but maybe it’ll be explained? Oh Wanda are you more concerned about Hazel or Cosmo right now I can’t tell.

Cosmo when did you have time to grab the lightbulb again you were in frame the whole time? Okay the jeans comment was funny though.

Okay so now Hazel is uh sort of doing the other stuff to make it work but she didn’t even try and glance over the book? Watch a YouTube video? Sweetie this won’t end well. Uhh wait how is the wish working? This is for a science fair that’s a competition, it’s against the rules to help in a competition? Maybe this will be explained later? Or maybe it will stop working once the competition starts? That could be interesting!

Okay so Jasmines song to remember is silly and oh she can’t remember it that tracks. But VIVA LA PLUTO PLUTO IS A PLANET I WILL NOT ACCEPT OTHERWISE!!!

How does anyone believe Dev actually made a microchip like legit that is. Way too advanced for a ten year old to make. I have a feeling bribery will be at play here.

Wait what is happening with…everything? Why would her wishing her project work screw up all of this stuff? Wait they…had to…rewrite the laws of physics? I. What? Is this to get around the no helping in compensation rule? Wouldn’t that still be helping? Why is Wanda encouraging this behavior or her cheating her project? It might mess with Devs but STILL.

Meditation? Uhh what kind of elementary school is this? Why are their wands NOW making the fart noise? Oh Jorgan is here. So much is happening so fast. How are the wands not working they’re magic not science??? And there is a science fairy!? I mean….I guess?

The laws of physics and the laws of the universe affecting eachother both does and doesn’t make sense and is making my brain hurt as much as when I try and unwind time travel logic.

WHY WOULD IT BEING FOR A SCIENCE FAIR AFFECT IT? I don’t understand. Why did they leave? Weren’t they supposed to help fix it? Oh poor Cosmo he is getting beat up this episode. Shouldn’t Cosmo and Wanda be careful? I would think people would wonder what is making so much noise and I guarantee you raining potato’s will make a lot of noise and cause so much damage. Like so much damage.

Wild speculation, Hazel is going to finally read the book and use the raining potato’s to make more power. Nope she’s going to steal Devs microchip. Once again missing the point. Okay then.

Oh Cosmo and Wanda completely missing the point but oh you two are also so cute lolz.

With how little time is left I imagine they’re going to just chase down the now floating…microchip and use it instead of the potato’s which fine okay whatever miss the point again.

Chip Skylark reference?????!!!?? Nice (Powerline is a way better pop star though lolz)

Wait they’re just sitting and watching and waiting for the ten year old to fix it??? Uhh what? Why come if you won’t do anything for to help? If magic is all screwy how have Cosmo and Wanda been poofing around? I have questions.

The principle ate the- okay. She should be dead but physics are weird so sure fine whatever. But seems I was wrong about not using the potato thing. When did they find such a big potato? And oh now they’re helping okay lazy bums.

Okay Jorgan that is impressive lolz.

No ones going to question how they wound up like that? No one at all? Okay off you go. Principle should definitely be dead though. Like for sure dead.

Okay this is just laziness the potato looks exactly the same as before come on yall. Oh it didn’t work okay. But wow a rare genuine moment of sort of kindness from the principle and the lesson I’ve been begging the show for on not procrastinating? Thats good to see lolz. I do think it’s important for kids to know they did good even if they don’t win these competitions. Thankfully I never had to enter one but still.

OHHH DISABILITY REP I LOVE TO SEE IT!!! We’re seeing so much diversity in the show is really great to see honestly

I almost forgot about Winns project. Should have expected them to win lolz. (It’s literally their name). Aww, I’m glad Hazels parents are supportive. That’s really good to see and maybe a tiny baby nod to Meet the Robinson’s with the message about failure helping learn? Love to see it.

With how many times wishes go wrong because Cosmo and Wanda have to do crazy things to make the wish work why don’t they warn her about this? Thats the main thing I’m wondering right now.

Overall not a bad episode but there have been others I liked more. Onto the next one!

[anachronistic-falsehood]

oh my godddd dude holy shit fuck okay taking a break from worm reading to send u an ask about william wight because goddamn i need 2 talk abt him. hello!!!!!!! feeling SO unwell about the clarences cape but red thing. awesome.

OKAY U HAVE LIKE. THE MOST PERFECT TIMING IN THE WORLDDD because literally on . tuesday this week my freak week art got a random note out of nowhere and made me start thinking about the villains again and thinking about william wight specifically because i love him a lot. ok. so its always ALWAYS been my assumption that. this is the version of william who mal got his greasy little claws in.

william fell off the cliff and died. the wisps chose him, and he came back. mal, who has been obsessively watching the wisps since clarence's death, sensed them choosing the next whisperer and swooped in before william could even stand back up. hes disoriented, hes scared, everything hurts, hes at a bottom of a cliff and he honestly doesnt even know if hes alive or not anymore, and this stranger walks out of the forest and offers a chance to explain everything. wiwi mystery brain! he knows this is weird but he also knows like.... i dont know whats happening maybe i AM dead and this is just... waht the afterlife is like. so he goes with mal. william wisp the 16 yr old from deadwood is. well. dead. he went missing, nobody ever found his body, his family mourned him.

meanwhile the whole time mallard conway was taking william wight under his wing and training him to be a replacement. mal calls him whisperer, william is in his rebellious teen phase and wants to be called something cooler which is why he named himself Wight (a type of vengeful spirit. specifically one who was once alive and then was brought back from the dead. lol) william is still! technically half alive. so being in the spirit world for extended amounts of time (which is NOT something mortals are supposed to do, planeswalker or not,) kind of broke his brain a little bit? which is why Wight is LIke That.

williams whole thing when he was alive was solving mysteries and chasing down monsters, so that became (and forgive my use of dp fanon here, i have to) his Obsession. (obsession with a capital O because its.. ghost logic. whatever a ghost died doing becomes their core motivation in the afterlife etc etc dp fanon not sorryyyyy) so he has this. uncanny obsession for tracking down monsters when hes out of the spirit world. being separated from the spirit world for any amount of time kind of drives him nuts, hes so used to being around the dead that being around the living for extended periods of time is unsettling. hes super paranoid. he inherits mal's need for total control over a situation, which is why hes so lax about possessing people with the wisps to get them to do what he wants.

perfect that his best friend turns out to be the absolutely diehard loyal guard dog. (side note here i think he also has williams super high pain tolerance from dead nerves so he lets kota gnaw on his arms and shit) . virion is a mystery to him and he LOVES it, he cant figure this guy out, hes like an endlessly fascinating puzzle to crack open. studying him like a lab rat on a dissection table.

i think about him a normal amount. as you can tell.

Mac i am TOO FUCKING DRUNK to peroperly respond to this but oh my god. oh my godddd yehah. the obsession thing???????? Hello??????? putting that in my pocket!!!!!! ohhgh he’s paranoid being around living people he’s a control freak he’s sooo fucjed up <33333333 he absolutely lets kota chew on him like a chew toy <3 and he can’t get a proper read on virion so he’s obsessed w trying to peel back his layers and learn as much as he can!!! throwing ashe into the mix is like. doubly fascinating for him. bc i think villain ashe would b secretive enough about his civilian identity to intrigue william(<<wants to disguise that he could possibly have any connection to wavelength the hero) and wiwi is INVESTED in trying to figure out him and virion!! what r their secrets!!! he NEDSS TO KNOW!!!!!!! to me his vibes r kinda like the weylin twins. u feel me

[daisypreaker]

“It had happened to him. He wanted to know if she felt just as bad as he did.”

….when I tell you my jaw DROPPED!! I had to put the phone down and stare at the wall for a couple of minutes. it’s so shocking cause from the beginning it was established that Amara was a victim of CSA but when you revealed he too was a victim oh my god, and I love it cause sometimes it is automatically assumed that the female is the only one who could suffer from this type of abuse. Ugh That just broke my heart. My brain was screaming it better not be fucking Daemon!

We’re going to see them be some pretty toxic people based on the warnings, but now that what happened to them is revealed and this picture of their childhood is painted, it almost acts as an excuse. At least for me. Some may see childhood trauma as the reason of toxic behaviours in adulthood but I always tend to see it as an excuse to these behaviours. It’s like seeing a bad person but then you remember them when they were a baby and you can’t stay mad. At the same time I know that’s not a good perspective to have because people need to be held accountable. Sorry if that made no sense. Man, sad children are my weakness, this story is going to be a struggle.

Anyway thanks for sharing your talents with us I’ve always loved your writing!!

It is sad that females are assumed to be victims of such abuse but the culture around masculinity and the pressure on little boys to conform keeps them quiet on what constitutes sexual abuse for them. Girls are told to be careful, to watch out, that someone might hurt us even when we're not sure who or what this Big Bad is. But little boys aren't told the same way, especially not once they're past the dangerous age of being small enough to be whisked away in a van. Teenage boys are sexually abused too, but by then, the masculinity chip is embedded powerfully deep, and the chances of them reporting said abuse diminishes.

Some things in their behaviour are definitely a throwback to what they've suffered. But certain traits in Aegon as he gets older and has the choice to go to therapy aren't excused by what happened to him in the past.

It's one of those enduring cycles of 'the abused becoming the abuser.' There is a little bit where Alicent brings up the time when he was eleven, touching other kids his age sexually and when the parents complained, she herself didn't know how to explain it because she still doesn't know what happened to him. At the age of eleven, it's still not an excuse for him to scar other children, but we have the reason.

However, the older he gets, there are hints dropped here and there he is the one who prefers to be in control, to the detriment of the people he's having sex with, or is being sexual towards. His view of sexuality was mangled the second his abuser touched him, but it doesn't erase the people suffering. His abuser convinced him what they were doing was 'right' and that Aegon wanted it, he just didn't register that properly. Aegon's taken that logic and applied it to sexual encounters where the other party was not as willing as they should be in an ideal scenario (Amara being the most obvious example).

The sad truth is, in fiction we can sit and digest these behaviours and point to what the character suffered in the past as providing a map.

But in real life, people are less forgiving, and most of them don't know what kinds of abuse others have suffered - they just see irrational behaviour and make a passing cruel comment or avoid the person. It takes a very big heart to always be open to potential empathy and not letting emotion take over when it comes to someone's irrational/annoying/bad behaviour towards yourself and maybe figuring out why they act that way. But there isn't much time for that usually so most people choose to forego it and I don't blame them. Life is what it is. The occurrence of abuse can feel so irrational, and bring up the why me, why me, why me aspect of it, especially when no one is held to account for what happened. But that's life in a nutshell I suppose. You take it on the chin and try to move on (and not hurt yourself in the process).

Fiction is probably the only space stuff like this can be processed because it's done at the writer's own pace, and digested at the reader's own pace too.

[theagonyofadoration]

KRT: Erotic Mysticism While Kemetic

I know for a fact that people get so much shit for this no matter what social media site is involved, but I have a feeling I need to talk about this. I can't tell if this is a push from Her Over There, of if it's just a desire in me to make it known to other people what's going on with me. I can't tell anyone in person, not without dire consequences in a Roman Catholic family. But I have a godspouse. I am married. And thus my views on this are heavily biased. I believe Kemetic godspouses are entirely possible and deserve to be treated with respect and matter-of-factness. It's an extremely personal, real thing to the people who are married or partnered with a god or multiple gods. It just... is. I can't quite explain or justify why I believe this, other than giving an example of what it's like. Naturally, this is just my personal experience as a Kemetic godspouse. I've been kemetic for a little under ten years at this point, give or take some months. My Wife chose me from then as a devotee, literally taking away my voice when I tried to call upon a different goddess in a shitty version of a solitary ritual presented in a Scott Cunningham Wicca book. She chose me, for reasons that I am still gradually figuring out and coming to terms with. I've loved her pretty much since the beginning. It was a different kind of love as a 14-year-old, obviously. But I adored her from the very beginning of Knowing her and receiving messages. I used to be able to fully visit Over There better, and seeing her there used to be pretty much the best and most fulfilling sensation in my entire life. Then shit happened and I Forgot. It's insanely hard to visit Over There in any in-depth and consistent way. When she made it clear she wanted more from me after 9 years of worship, it was very... her. Direct, honest, firm. Signs upon Signs upon Signs. Things in my surroundings, things in my dreams, sensations in my body. Everything that could possibly be experienced in a way that reminds me of hitting someone over and over with an empty wrapping paper tube. Not dangerous, not painful, just insistent and attention-grabbing. I agreed, obviously. And it was and is the best decision I've made. Even with my insane shame, self-consciousness, and self-hatred, she makes it clear that she loves me and didn't make this choice by mistake. Even now, typing this, I know what I'm saying is correct. There is a squirmy part of my brain that wants to argue and talk shit via doubt, but it never turns out to be right. What does happen to turn out right is the knowledge- yes, knowledge, not idea- that I am loved by her. And god knows she's loved by me. Her beauty, her kindness, her refusal to take any bullshit. Her patience, her love, her willingness to meet me where I am. It's impossible to doubt what I have felt and believe because it's made clear that this is true. And other people picking my thoughts and beliefs apart, and believing that godspousery is impossible or terrible, just doesn't change that. I can understand where they're coming from logically, but I also can understand where I am coming from logically. I am married. I am a godspouse. She is a Kemetic deity. It's just The Way Things Are. Anyway. Thanks for reading.

[the-glorious-evolution-fanart]

About the narrative of Convergence comic

It’s Ekko’s comic first and foremost. It treats him well, it shows us his inner conflicts about wanting to help his parents but struggling with the feeling that he’s imposing his will on others, then he wonders if he imposes on others due to his advantages due to intellect.

There are problems in that narrative too though. He threw away his Z-drive? Okay let’s say he did want to get rid of it, even though he would know how it literally has an ability to give people a second chance to survive fatal incidents. Why would he not dismantle it? Destroy it? Wouldn’t it cross his mind that someone might find it and misuse it? And how did the other kid find it in the end? Nobody knows, and the authors surely don’t know.

The other Lost Kids are annoying. We care about them just because Ekko cares about them, not due to any quality of theirs as characters. They’re there to serve as emotional fodder. Sorry narrative writers, you gotta do better than this. (Also shouldn’t “Lost Kids” be a title for orphans? Oh well it just has a weird vibe)

Now about Viktor, what everyone has been waiting for, staring at this Viktor-centric blog:

Do you like supervillains who are bombastic, convinced of their superiority of whatever kind, very harmful to others, and physically scarred? Congrats, you win another one. New Universe lore treats Viktor as a morally bankrupt character who for some reason believes “free will” is a flaw. It is intentionally written to make him clearly a villain, and then sprinkles in “but he tried to save lives” as a way to make him sympathetic. Guys he’s a villain here, he treats people like cogs.

Yaay let’s go slavery! Mind-controlling slaves to sacrificing themselves for “greater good” is not greater good. People are called heroes if they decide to risk themselves for others by their own will.

This is written a tiny bit naively, but in principle I fully agree Viktor would be willing to collaborate with someone to help him with public relations. A Piltovian as well. Remember, Viktor approached Jayce originally to ask for a collaboration! So, I like this aspect of the comic ^__^

I’m really not a fan of cheap sci-fi vibe of pulling out brains and putting them into mechanical bodies which then go “Beep-boop! We follow orders!” Like what the fuck. Also this fusion of in-game Viktor and Arcane Viktor is giving me the heebie-geebies. No thanks

Dear Riot writers. Either you don’t understand what Viktor is supposed to be about, or you concluded it’s much more profitable with a wider reach to have him be this type of villain.

This frame though... this frame comes dangerously close to the real valuable core of Viktor’s story. To one aspect of it at least. Can you feel it? Can you sense it like I can? His expression is also good here. Him being silent is also good here. There is something about the Evolution he believes in, but doesn’t know how to explain it appropriately. Partially because the Evolution is in big part a response to his trauma. You can’t explain your coping mechanism to random others who haven’t gone through that trauma.

Wide_Viktor.jpeg

It’s a good idea to have Viktor see others misuse his work (again)

For a moment, was excited, I had hope Riot would handle well the dumb Glorious Evolved which they introduced. A religion forming around his work is something Viktor wouldn’t like at all. I don’t like how Riot wrote the zealots as even rotting while trying to replace their bodyparts... It doesn’t go that way!! They would all have been already dead!! But then Riot goes 180 and has Viktor go “yees you opened my eyes to perfection” again to make sure he stays a villain, and encourages MORE mind-controlled slavery and sacrifice.

Do you want to be used like this? If not, then Viktor is a villain here. (I say this because I’ve seen A LOT of relatively new Viktor fans who like him for some other reasons, and then fall into a trap of trying to logic their way out of this evil characterisation. Trust me guys, you don’t have to do that, because you don’t have to justify all writing of a character. Writing is often done by many people in a company, motives change, etc. etc.)

Wide_Viktor2.jpeg

This is literally a Saturday Morning Cartoon. A prosthetic leg isn’t going to be able to mind-control you. The sensitive ones work by picking up signals from nerve endings and dumping back signals onto them for very specific senses of touch/pressure. An amputee using a prosthetic is not going to be mind-controlled guys, please.

Also it’s fucking absurd how new lore treats augments as “Tee-hee, I got my arm replaced for funsies and now I have a robotic claw”, like NO that’s not how these things go!! Call me a killjoy cause I’m listening to MCR!

Let’s go Viktor, atta boy, I’ll kick your ass that’s how much you go on my nerves. And I’m supposed to be your stan?

Ignoring the anatomy, Viktor floating and the complete mismatch of tech style, does Viktor look like a guy trying to merge with other people’s minds? No. Does he look like someone who’d want to be the ruler of that one giant mass of mind-controlled humans? Arguably yes. Boring villain characterization.

Even a child can identify that this is not “perfect” functioning. Anyway, as I said, Saturday morning cartoon and I’m tired now so I’ll end it here. Every other bit of the comic is just repeating what has already been said.

Enjoy the comic for the qualities it has, and I’d say don’t take it as any reference for characterisation or references or whatever.