#THIS IS THE KIND OF WHOLESOME SHIT I LIVE AND BREATHE FOR

[mrhowells]

what is your favourite clois scene?

I honestly love all their interactions so much that I couldn't even decide on my top five, so I'll just talk about their opening scene in booster because I keep thinking about it and it really captures one of the main reasons I love them so much.

So they're both in transitional periods of their lives, with Clark trying to create a new persona for himself and Lois working towards a promotion, and they're just so... invested and supportive about it?? Lois is helping Clark with his body language and reassures him because he's feeling insecure but then he's like "forget about ME Lois you're up for that promotion!!!" and you can see on his face how proud and excited about it he is like, he's really her biggest cheerleader and I'm😭😭😭

They're best friends and they're in love and above all else they just genuinely want to see each other thrive and be happy and grow into the best versions of themselves and it makes me want to collapse on the floor in tears.

[muniimyg]

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹ caught!joon ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹

series m.list // taglist request: closed

note: cos daddy is HOME !!!!

sunday nights are for wholesome group activities. 

no uncomfortable crowds of strangers, no drinking, and definitely no crazy shit. no situations. sunday night is a time for your friends to decompress and be together. for the air around you to feel lived-in—warm with the familiar smell of beer, leftover pizza, and jin’s precious vanilla candle trying its best. 

the tv is loud. 

taehyung is yelling at hobi for not having his ‘head in the game.’ meanwhile, jungkook is laughing like he hasn’t lost three games in a row. jimin and yoongi are calling out better strategies for either of their friends to pick up and win the game. 

you’re sitting on the couch, half-watching the screen. legs crossed. fingers curled lightly around a warm beer bottle. your face is relaxed, disinterested. your chest, however, is another story—tight. 

buzzing. 

like something hot is pressed under your skin.

beside you is him. 

namjoon, whose thigh is pressed to yours. whose eyes keep lingering over the silhouette of your cleavage… you don’t have it in you to ignore it. to play nonchalant or act like you don’t want what he’s probably thinking about. instead, you let his fingers brush the inside of your knee. lazily. like he’s thinking about something else entirely.

you don’t move. 

you don’t want to.

as the others continue their chaos, he shuffles closer to you. then, in a low and casual murmur, he asks; “can you say it?”

when he says it, he doesn’t even look at you. instead, his eyes finally move away from your chest and to the tv. he’s pretending to pay attention to the game. 

you exhale softly. still watching the screen.

“say what?”

then, his fingers trail higher. 

slow. 

up to the soft skin of your inner thigh. 

his pinky grazes the hem of your shorts and stays there. the kind of touch that’s not overt enough to call out—but impossible to ignore. nam joon is always thankful for your choice of clothing. tonight, your little yoga shorts are the perfect mix of challenge and easy access. 

with a lazy smirk, he tilts his head and finally meets your eyes.

“that you missed me.”

you blink at him. 

tilting your head, you play dumb. “why? we hung out last week.”

nam joon lets out a scoff. 

“yeah. with everyone.”

“still,” you tease. “we hung out last week.”

“hmm? but not like this,” he whines as his hand fully settles. his palm is warm against your thigh. your breath almost hitches as he adds; “not this close.”

then, he leans in, breath grazing the shell of your ear. 

“can i?”

your throat tightens. stomach dips.

you know what he means. you know this game. this excitement of being caught in the act… but more than that? doing things out in the open. being shameless like this… it’s a different kind of needy that you love on him.

so, you nod. 

and just like that, something shifts.

namjoon’s eyes drop to your mouth. they linger. then, he blinks his attention down your legs and his hand moves—slow and sure, sliding between your thighs like he’s just shifting positions, like it’s nothing.

his fingers drag up. you uncross your legs without thinking. stupid. obvious.

but no one’s watching.

he leans back, casual, and grabs the hem of his hoodie. pulls it off in one motion and drops it over your lap like a blanket. you know this move. he’s done it before. cocky. practiced. 

his hand stays under the hoodie.

his fingers trace the seam of your panties.

you blink, steadying your breath. jaw tight. stare blankly at the tv where yoshi’s flying off the track again.

he finds your clit with two fingers. rubs once.

you exhale. shift your hips just slightly, like adjusting.

he dips lower, fingers sliding into the heat of you through your underwear, testing. when he feels how wet you are—how ready—you feel his breath catch. he huffs a laugh.

“fuck.”

you press your thighs together and he shoves his hand deeper. you gasp as you feel his fingers slip in between your folds. you buck your hips a little, lifting so it’s easier for him. 

he’s not being nice.

he’s slow, yes. but cruel with it. curling his fingers just right, drawing lazy patterns. two fingers, slipping under the fabric now. touching you where it’s warmest. softest. slickest.

you swallow.

his other hand comes up to your jaw. not to hold it—just to tilt it. he wants to see your face. he always wants to see what you’ll give him.

you meet his eyes. and he smiles like he’s already got you undone.

“ready?” taehyung says suddenly, turning around from the tv.

namjoon doesn’t blink. doesn’t move. his fingers stay buried in you.

“we’ll play next round—”

“mhfffm—”

taehyung blinks.

 “damn, ___.  if you gotta pee, just go. you’re squirming.”

someone laughs. you can’t tell who.

you can’t breathe.

you offer taehyung an awkward smile before he turn back to the screen. as the others chatter goes on full blast again, you pull namjoon’s hand out slowly—grip his wrist under the hoodie and slide it out like it’s nothing. he lets you. grinning like a bastard.

you smooth your expression and excuse yourself from the group (who are paying 0% of attention to you). walking out of the living room, you head down the hall and enter the bathroom. you shut the bathroom door behind you. the second it clicks, your back hits the wall. you breathe out hard.

two beats later, you hear it. 

footsteps.

he doesn’t knock.

just opens the door, steps in, and locks it behind him. still grinning.

his fingers are glistening.

“missed you too, by the way,” namjoon murmurs, voice low, almost sheepish. like the words had been sitting on his tongue too long, softening at the edges.

then his hands are on your face—warm, familiar, thumbs brushing just beneath your cheekbones like he's memorizing the shape of you again.

he leans in, and you meet him halfway.

the kiss starts slow. his mouth moves over yours like he’s rediscovering it, like he’s starving for softness after too long without. he exhales through his nose and you feel it fan across your skin—hot, shaky. he kisses like someone who's been thinking about it for weeks. like he wants to make sure you feel every second of it.

his fingers curl a little tighter against your jaw.

your hands find the hem of his shirt, not to lift it, not yet—just to hold onto something real.

he pulls back just slightly, forehead resting against yours, lips ghosting over your mouth, like he’s not done.

yeah.

he missed you more.

[brunchable]

Secret Santa | S. R.

Pairings: Steve Rogers x F!Reader Themes: Ex-lovers. Petty Revenge but Steve is just sweet ;_; Summary: You and Steve are forced to participate in your friend group Secret Santa gift exchange, and of course, you end up assigned to each other. You're determined to give him the worst gift possible, but his surprisingly thoughtful present throws you off—and leaves you questioning your assumptions about him. A/N: This oneshot is a part of my 4K follower Christmas Celebration. Also this one will be connected to Santa Baby that will be released next week. dividers by @saradika-graphics

It wasn’t your idea to do Secret Santa. You’d never suggest something so contrived, so obviously destined for disaster. No, this brilliant plan came courtesy of Nat, whose mischievous smirk while handing out the hat of names told you she knew exactly what she was doing.

The moment you unfolded the slip of paper and saw his name, you felt the universe mocking you. Steve Rogers. Captain Perfect. Your ex.

You stared at the paper as though sheer willpower might summon a new name. It didn’t. Across the room, Steve raised his eyebrows as he read his own slip, the corner of his mouth twitching. You had a sinking suspicion the universe had played a cruel joke on him, too.

“What are the odds?” Nat said, sidling up next to you with a glass of wine.

“Oh, I don’t know. Rigged?” you hissed back, crumpling the paper in your fist.

Steve Rogers had a habit of ruining things. Like relationships. Or, in this case, your plans to breeze through the gift exchange with a generic mug or a gift card. No, this was war. You were going to find the most obnoxious, useless gift imaginable. The kind of thing that screamed, I know exactly what you hate, and I’m leaning into it.

You weren’t just shopping for a gift. You were shopping for revenge.

The mall was an absolute hellscape of holiday cheer—children screaming, Mariah Carey’s All I Want for Christmas Is You blasting on loop, and couples holding hands like it wasn’t a battlefield. You were on a mission, weaving through the chaos, hunting for something so heinous that it would make Steve Rogers cringe.

The first store you entered was a pop-culture knick-knack shop. It was overflowing with mugs that said, “Live, Laugh, Love,” and socks decorated with pizza slices. You rolled your eyes. Too tame. Too basic. No, you needed something with bite. Something so wrong that Steve would open it and instantly regret ever existing.

That’s when you saw it. A coffee mug. But not just any coffee mug.

It was massive, comically oversized, the kind of mug that could double as a soup bowl. Bright red, with bold, white text plastered across the front:

“WORLD’S OKAYEST LOVER.”

You snorted so loudly a nearby teenager gave you a dirty look. But it wasn’t enough. Oh no. You needed more.

Two hours later, you stumbled into the most chaotic store in the mall: an unhinged combination of novelty items, offensive gag gifts, and borderline illegal paraphernalia. The walls were lined with things like glow-in-the-dark shot glasses shaped like butts and calendars full of “inspirational” quotes… all of which were expletives. And there, under a flashing neon sign that screamed, BEST GIFT IDEAS EVER, you found it.

The pièce de résistance.

A calendar. Not just any calendar, though. It was titled:

“12 Months of Aggressive Affirmations.”

The cover featured a cartoon bunny flipping the bird. Each month was worse than the last—January read: “GET UP AND FUCKING WIN,” February shouted, “STOP BEING A SAD LITTLE BITCH,” and March simply screamed, “YOU’RE NOT THE PROBLEM, EVERYONE ELSE IS JUST DUMB AS SHIT.”

You couldn’t breathe. You were doubled over, tears streaming down your face as you clutched the calendar. It was perfect. Aggressive. Vulgar. Completely unnecessary. And most importantly? It would absolutely short-circuit Steve Rogers’ clean-cut, wholesome brain.

You slapped it down on the counter, ignoring the cashier’s judgmental look as they scanned it.

“You okay?” they asked, clearly unnerved by the manic grin plastered across your face.

“Oh, I’m great,” you said, pulling out your card. “This is going to make someone very uncomfortable.”

————

On the day of the exchange, you could hardly contain your excitement. The calendar was wrapped in gaudy, glittery paper that shed sparkles everywhere—another little insult aimed directly at Steve. When he finally picked it up, his brow furrowed at the excessive tape you’d used to ensure he’d struggle opening it.

Everyone watched as he peeled away the layers, muttering something about how you always made things difficult. But when the calendar came into view, his face went completely blank.

“‘Aggressive Affirmations,’” he read aloud, flipping to January. “‘GET UP AND FUCKING WIN.’” His lips twitched, but he refused to give you the satisfaction of a laugh. Instead, he held it up, deadpan. “Wow. You really went for it.”

“You’re welcome,” you said, smirking.

Nat practically fell off the couch laughing. “This is… incredible.”

“Yeah, this’ll look great in his bedroom,” Bucky added, snatching it to flip through the months. “Oh, man, look at June. ‘YOU’RE HOTTER THAN A FUCKING FOREST FIRE.’ Steve, this is the kind of energy you need.”

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose, muttering something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like, “I hate all of you.”

But when you caught his eye, you saw it—a flicker of amusement, quickly smothered by exasperation.

“This is going in my gym. Where no one else can see it.” He put the calendar down carefully, shaking his head. 

“Oh no,” you said, grinning wickedly. “It’s going on your fridge. Front and center. So every morning, you can start your day with a dose of aggressive self-love.”

Steve sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t know whether to be mad or impressed.”

“Oh, be impressed,” you said, raising your glass. “It’s the best gift you’ll ever get.”

And when he smiled—small, reluctant, but genuine.

Steve wasn’t good at gifts. Not because he didn’t try, but because he overthought everything. For him, giving a gift wasn’t just about handing someone an object; it was a gesture, a piece of himself. And when it came to you—well, he hadn’t earned the right to give you anything, had he?

The relationship ended because of him. That much was clear. He’d been the one who pulled away, too overwhelmed by his own insecurities and the shadow of the life he thought he couldn’t offer you. And yet, here he was, standing in front of a boutique window, staring at the dress he knew you’d wanted for months.

He remembered the first time he saw you touch it. You weren’t even shopping for yourself. You’d dragged him into the boutique while looking for a birthday gift for Natasha, weaving through the racks with easy confidence. But then, you stopped.

Just for a moment.

The dress was simple—red silk, with delicate straps and a neckline that dipped just enough to make you bite your lip in that nervous way he loved. Your fingers brushed over the fabric, and you sighed, soft and wistful.

“Beautiful,” you’d murmured, almost to yourself.

Steve had stood a few steps behind, pretending to check his phone. He remembered how quickly you moved on, like you didn’t want to linger too long. You probably thought he hadn’t noticed. But he did. He always noticed.

Now, months later, Steve stood in the same boutique, heart pounding like he was about to charge into battle. The sales associate greeted him with a warm smile, clearly trying not to gawk at the former Captain America standing awkwardly among racks of designer dresses.

“I’m looking for a gift,” he said, clearing his throat.

“For someone special?”

He hesitated, the words catching in his throat. “Yeah. She’s, uh... she’s special.”

The associate nodded knowingly and led him straight to the dress. “This one’s a favorite. Classic, elegant.”

Steve reached out, fingers grazing the fabric just as yours had. It felt like silk against his calloused palms—soft, delicate, everything he wasn’t sure he deserved to touch.

“She looked at this one,” he said quietly, almost to himself. “A while ago. I don’t think she thought I noticed.”

The associate smiled gently. “Well, you noticed. That’s what matters.”

He bought it without hesitation, ignoring the price tag. The dress came in a sleek black box tied with a ribbon, and Steve carried it home like it was the most precious thing in the world.

————

That night, Steve sat at his kitchen table with the box in front of him, a pen poised over a blank card. Words had never been his strong suit, but he needed you to know this wasn’t just a gift—it was an apology, a hope, a quiet confession.

After a long moment, he began to write:

Y/N,

I’m not great at words, but you always told me it’s the thought that counts. I saw you look at this dress once, and I don’t know if you even remember, but I do. You should have something beautiful because you deserve everything beautiful in the world. I know I’m the last person who should be saying that. But maybe this can say what I haven’t been able to.

—Steve

He stared at the card for a long time before tucking it into the box.

On the day of the gift exchange, Steve handed you the box without a word. Your name was scrawled on the tag in his careful handwriting. You hesitated, eyeing him warily, but curiosity got the better of you.

As you untied the ribbon and opened the lid, your breath caught.

The dress.

The room felt smaller somehow, the chatter of your friends fading into the background. You didn’t know what to say, and Steve didn’t push. He just stood there, watching you with that quiet, earnest expression that used to make your heart ache.

Your fingers brushed over the fabric, just as they had that day in the boutique. For a moment, you couldn’t speak.

“You remembered?” you finally whispered, looking up at him.

Steve shrugged, his hands shoved deep into his pockets. “I always remember.”

You froze at his words, the weight of them pressing down on your chest. It wasn’t just the dress—it was everything. All the times he’d been paying attention when you thought he wasn’t. All the moments you’d convinced yourself he didn’t care.

Your throat tightened as guilt began to creep in, sharp and relentless.

“I—” You stopped, fingers curling into the fabric. The silk felt too soft, too expensive, too meaningful in your hands. “Steve, I don’t... I don’t deserve this.”

His brow furrowed, and he took a small step closer. “Why would you say that?”

You laughed weakly, a bitter sound. 

“Because I’ve spent weeks trying to think of the worst gift to give you. Something obnoxious. Something petty. And you...” You gestured at the dress, your voice breaking slightly. “You did this.”

His gaze softened, but there was something unreadable in his eyes.

“Y/N,” he said quietly, his voice steady. “You don’t have to feel guilty about that. I get it. You’re angry at me. You have every right to be.”

You shook your head, the lump in your throat growing. “But I shouldn’t still be mad. It’s been months. You tried, Steve. You really tried, and I—”

“You have nothing to apologize for,” he interrupted gently.

But that only made it worse. Because you did—not for being angry, but for the way you’d handled it. For not seeing how hard he was trying now.

“I just—” You exhaled shakily, holding the dress tighter against you. “I thought you weren’t paying attention. That I didn’t matter to you like that. And now... this.”

Steve’s jaw tensed, his hands fidgeting in his pockets. 

“You mattered,” he said simply, the rawness in his tone cutting straight through you. “You always mattered. I just... didn’t know how to show it before.”

The room was suddenly too warm, too loud. You felt exposed, vulnerable under his gaze. His words clung to you like static, leaving no room to breathe.

You lowered your eyes, staring down at the dress in your hands. “This... it’s beautiful, Steve. It’s too much. I don’t deserve it after—”

“You do,” he interrupted, his voice firm this time. “You deserve something beautiful. Even if you hate me, Y/N.”

You glanced up sharply at that, seeing the way his eyes flickered with something like regret—or maybe hope.

“I'm sorry. I don’t—” You stopped yourself. Lying felt crueller than the truth. “I don’t hate you, Steve. I just... I don’t know what to do with all of this.”

He smiled faintly, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “You don’t have to do anything. It’s a gift. No strings attached.”

And somehow, that made the guilt worse. Because he meant it. You could tell. And it left you wondering if maybe he’d always meant it, even when he didn’t know how to show it.

“Thank you,” you said softly, clutching the dress like a lifeline.

Steve nodded, his hands still buried in his pockets as he stepped back, giving you space. But his eyes lingered, and for the first time in months, you felt like you really saw him. Not the perfect soldier, not your ex—but the man who’d been paying attention all along.

Tags: @disneyprincessbuffyannesummers @strawberrybisou @alyana-luvs-u @rogersbarber @veronicapaula

@fynnwolff @bmyva1entine @thereoncewasagirlnamedjane @awaywithtime

[the-one-who-lambs]

"Propose," for @bamsara

HI YOUR DOODLES INSPIRED ME HERE'S A POETRY ATTACK. rambling below the cut.

At first, the death waltz is a misstep.

A sickening skeletal crack, a shape of an invisible scythe.

Sincerity is too kind a lie, but His sacrosanct

Protection (you think)

Lets you rise once more.

Death cannot keep you, but you would let Him

If he welcomes you.

You only believe what He thinks you should know.

The flames engulf you after the smoke does,

But your soul has nearly shed its corpse when you see them.

You stand in the vast chain-bound sanctuary and breathe

Fully (your lungs don’t remember being choked).

It is the first of a fitful of

Scorn and surprises and bone fingertips pressed against your skin.

He helps you to your feet.

Your heart should not beat here. In the infiniteness of your bosom it awakens.

The very semblance of the jagged-bare flesh

Encircling your neck is an intimacy in itself.

The blissful torment of the swordsman’s blade

Releases (so close to peril)

And He is already in your periphery.

Call it duty. Call it love.

Choose it as the last decision you’ll ever make.

Fate’s a tarot pull. You draw your card with eyes sealed shut.

You are a disgraced, depraved approximation of a person.

The chill of his embrace is warmer than the hands

That build the bonfire. It is in the name of

Someone (you shan’t say who)

And in the ashes of your grief your reflection

Stares back with three eyes.

The temptation to burn yourself seeps out,

Ichor-like. You don’t die tonight, not yet.

A careful drip of poison. The aftertaste of iron

In your mouth: communion seeping into your own goblet.

A moonshine moment of annihilation, however brief

Before (infectious, echoing, comforting)

You bleed out. You hope you die today.

He hopes you die today. It’s an

Ambrosial veil between you.

You slip beneath it with a sweet hello.

It’s never quite intentional until

The myths surrounding Him fall away.

The secrets you keep are shared, kept safe

Until (your reunion, this time, was not quite an accident)

They are intertwined: you are inescapably

Lonely and in your separate spheres

You vie for dominance. It’s a furious, bloodsoaked rendezvous.

It was always He who waited, but you’ll be patient.

He feels you in every dream. You

Stop time with your voices.

It’s His frustration melting away

With your kisses (you’re not there yet)

And makes Him yours, in freedom,

Dependent on nothing nobody you himself

The fetters are invisible but you hear them

Rattling every time your heart beats.

Your breath need not return anymore so you

Relearn to dodge the aim of an arrow, the pierce of a blade.

Living is foul, a promise half-hidden,

Desperate. (It lingers on your tongue.)

Death bound you together. You know how to die.

You have to remind yourself that heaven lays barren.

It will not hold you

Should Death keep you apart.

Get appreciated idiot /pos /lh

So, this was inspired by this post, which was super wholesome and sweet, but I couldn't write this without infusing it with the urgency and anxiety and sense of danger that looms over The Rehabilitation of Death. Bits and pieces of references to your AU are sprinkled in throughout. I hope you (and my readers and your readers as well) enjoy picking apart the themes here!

I actually wrote this live on stream last night! I made sure none of my friends were streaming before I started because I didn't want to miss anyone if someone was already live, but then you started streaming like 10 minutes later and I was like FUCK now I wanna watch you. But after a couple of hours on my new extra-hard CotL save (OUCH), I switched to writing and just... hoped you wouldn't pop in because I wanted this to be a surprise. For most of the writing part of the stream this poem was titled "IF SARA STOPS STREAMING SEND ME A WARNING."

Anyway, we don't usually get to talk more than a couple times per week because we both have Shit To Do, but you are SO FUN to be around and I am so so glad I met you!! Your friendship is a blessing and your creativity is a gift.

Also posted to AO3 as onethirdofimpossible here!

[autistic-crypt1d]

Star Trek Voyager Live Blogging:

Season 1

Ok I'm finally doing it, please be aware that I'm going to insult this show a bit, not in a malicious way, in a "dear god these special effects are horrendous way" but I promise I'm going to give it a fair shot and also say nice things. Anyway, let's go!

Updates:

- Caretaker, Part 1 & 2

- oh my god the space ships 😭

- oh my god it's so bad 😭

- that's the lady everyone talks about!

- is this the kind of guy that I'm gonna hate forever or the kind of guy I'm gonna hate and then against my will start to like

- awww they're so cute!

- uh oh

- ok I'm officially interested

- Woolsey!!

- wtf

- aww Paris cares about him 😭

- aww they're bonding in the alien infirmary

- THE SUIT

- I recognize the woman that plays the Ocampa girl

- well I guess not, I googled her and I've never seen anything she's been in

- OMG ARE THEY JOINING THEM

- THEY ARE

- ya know, this is pretty damn good!!!

- Parallax

- the doctor is so funny

- aw she's so sweet to him 😭

- HUH???

- the doctor shrinking is so fucking funny

- I KNEW IT WAS GONNA BE THEM

- CHARACTER DEVELOPMENTTTTT

- Time And Again

- ew he’s being gross again

- omg Kes’s outfit is so cute!!

- what the fuuuuuck

- oh god they're gonna cause the tragedy aren't they, by trying to get them back

- poor doctor 😭

- NOT PARIS TERRIFYING THE CHILD XD

- KICK HIS ASS PARIS

- I KNEW IT!!!

- oh shid

- Phage

- oml XD

- oh shid

- HIS LUNGS?!?!?!?!

- THE SLAP

- oh my god she decorated for him 😭

- BRO SEDATE HIM

- thank you oml

- I don't understand why they're subjecting him to this, they're still trying to catch the alien who did it, he doesn't need to be awake for this, he doesn't need to be experiencing this

- god her voice in this scene with them 😭

- my heart is breaking from this y'all

- aren't they worried about the plague being transmitted to them??

- I love Kes, she's awesome

- The Cloud

- don't listen to Paris Kim, ask her to join youuuuu

- Kim's sass XD

- "I remember being in my mother's womb" BRO WHAT

- I'm sorry but I'm bored of the holo scene

- this is really wholesome

- it's a lizard 😭

- THEY INVITED HER YAAAAAAY!!!

- "he's a pig, and so are you" TELL HIM TORRES

- Eye Of the Needle

- me everytime I hear the word wormhole "STARGATE?!?!?!?"

- OH??

- bro Kes's outfits are so pretty

- she's so pretty

- damn way to be persuasive Janeway!

- man this is not gonna pan out well and I already sad

- nooooo he can't be left behind 😭

- yup, knew this wasn't gonna work out

- this Romulan guy is so nice I'm gonna cry 😭

- NOOOOOOO 😭

- HELL YEAH DOCTOR!! STAND UP FOR YOURSELF!!

- HE'S GETTING A NAME!!!

- Ex Post Facto

- BRO WHAT

- some notes got lost here

- this is brutal, Paris is an ass but he doesn't deserve this

- I'm so confused

- DAAAAAAMN WAY TO GO TUVOK

- Emanations

- omfg are there gonna be giant space spiders

- ah hell there's gonna be giant space sliders aren't there

- YUP, SPACE SPIDERS

- well said Chakotay

- no space spiders?

- oh shit it's a sacrifice??

- uh oh

- I don't understand why she wants him to "cross over" so badly

- poor Kim, this is such a brutal situation to be in

- this poor guy oml

- COME ON KIM BREATHE

- HELL YEAH KIM!!!!!

- Prime Factors

- "you are in distress" is that a fucking threat?!?!?!

- there's something up with this dude

- "a vacation" that never ends well in these kinds of shows

- he makes me so uncomfortable 😭

- I really hate the way he keeps touching her, and the way that girl exposed Kim to the wind without permission and warning

- man the engineers are gonna fuck this up aren't they, LISTEN TO YOUR CAPTAIN

- knew it, terrible guy, terrible place

- YO PLOT TWIST

- bro this woman can't follow an order to save her fucking life

- HELL YEAH TORRES, CHARACTER GROWTH

- god damn that office scene was brutal emotionally

- State Of Flux

- OH???? THEY'RE A THING????

- what the fuuuuuuck

- Heroes And Demons

- bro Kim cannot catch a break wtf

- the doctor is goin in!!

- awww he gets to see outside 😭

- man is been a bit since we've seen Paris, wonder why

- I really like Freya, I'm sad she's not real :(

- HIS FIRST KISS

- :(

- Cathexis

- oml XD

- bro what is this episode, Janeway is living out her romance novel fantasy and Chakotay is brain dead???

- second episode where Paris is back and he's already in trouble

- aw man, he hurt Kes under the influence of the creature :(

- OH!!!! THE "ENTITY" IS CHAKOTAY ISN'T IT

- YEAH!!!!!

- ya know, I really thought the part with Janeway at the beginning would be more important

- Faces

- aww, making the crew food from home is so sweet

- damn, it's the organ harvesters again

- I feel so bad for her 😭

- oh shit he separated her!

- it is so weird seeing her without the makeup

- :(

- oh jesus

- OH MY FUCKING GOD

- way to go klingon B'Elona

- wow, this cave scene between the two is powerful af

- SHE STAYS HUMAN FOREVER?!?!?!

- oh ok no she's getting turned back

- "I guess, I'll just have to accept that I'm going to spend the rest of my life, fighting her" OW

- HER TOUCHING HER FOREHEAD 😭

- wow ok that episode was way more emotional than I was expecting

- Jetrel

- this is so sad 😭

- WHY IS HE ON BOARD

- "did what had to be done" bullshit

- dude I thought the guy that said they only live 8 or 9 years was an idiot, that's true?!?!?!? How old is Kes?!?!?!?

- oh my god Jetrel has it too doesn't he, he hasn't had a change of heart he's just trying to save himself, bastard

- please tell me no one has any sympathy for Jetrel

- he deserves every bit of hate and anger that Neelix has for him

- this is so fucking heartbreaking 😭

- I loved Neelix almost immediately but this, this has given me a whole other level of respect for him. He has seen death on a level one can only imagine and he greets others with love and joy.

- god I hate this guy

- :(

- Learning Curve

- is she in her romance book thing again?

- her romance book thing is a horror thing isn't it, cuz even the first one was giving creepy

- since when is there another medical trainee? Blue is medical isn't it?

- DAMN CHAKOTAY

- I googled it, apparently blue can also mean science which is odd

- DID THE CHEESE SERIOUSLY INFECT THE SHIP

- BONDIIIIING

- holy crap that's the season finale already??

Season 2

[starmocha]

"he also may or may not have used his Evol to evaporate three certain plushies from his daughter’s room" PLS I LIVE FOR THAT MOMENT AND THAT FIC

no because sylus poured his blood and sweat and a lot of his evol to get those plushies for her, he absolutely knows what he got and what he didn't ok, don't even try to deny it

since i'm gushing about the fic, kudos for the way you handled jealous sylus. the second those plushies were wiped out from existence, so was his jealousy, problem solved, no need to even make a fuss about it.

and yeah, zayne is a giant green forest. that doesn't mean he's absolutely flawless but my god that man is out there dealing with so much shit, there's literally a god punishing him for funsies and he still finds the time to dote on mc and to be kind and patient

he deserves the kind of bj that will literally make the muscles on his thighs spasm, the kind that is so good it makes his moans dissolve into the cutest chuckle as he comes down from his high but still feels dazed and just entranced

he'd totally grab mc, make her sit on his lap and have this minutes long make out session as he recovers, they'd both forget how to breathe, he'd taste himself on her tongue and feel ridiculously proud that his girl is, well, his

he deserves the world 😭😭

...I wasn't going to say it because them using their evols to entertain their babies is so wholesome and pure

but what if baby snowdrop is hanging out with his dad while mc's on a mission

and zayne's evol backlash strikes again and he tries so hard to hide the immense pain he's in because the last thing he wants is to traumatize his baby

but then he just collapses and all he really registers is his son yelling and crying so zayne tries to calm him down, saying he's ok, it'll pass, no, don't touch it, daddy's alright but those 5% genes he got from mc speak louder and he just throws himself onto zayne and hugs him and zayne wants to scream because he's so terrified of hurting his kid but he can barely move

eventually the pain gets better and the ice starts to melt and the first thing he does is take care of snowdrop, grabbing a blanket to warm him up, reassuring him that it was alright now

baby clinging to him and refusing to let go, falling asleep after crying so hard

the occasional sniffles make zayne wince

anyaay, after the worst is over, he explains everything to his kid in the best way possible

and baby snowdrop goes into his own little doctor mode and promises to take care of his dad to which zayne pulls him into a tight hug and tells him he already does

through it all he's very composed but when he's alone with mc he breaks down because that entire situation could've gone from bad to worse in a second

in the end, they all move on from that situation but zayne has to let his baby examine the new scars on his arms every day to see if they're healing well 🥺 because he's daddy's doctor and his treatment is to place drooly kisses on the affected area 🥺

i'm sorry I'm ovulating and in a rollercoster of emotions and my brain has been throwing horny thoughts at me followed by hurt/comfort thoughts all day and if I didn't share i'm sure I would just explode

LOL the jealous over the other LIs' plushies scenario is something I wish and intend to also do with the other guys' series as well. I just think it's hilarious how the kids would be all :D while their respective father is seething inside but has to Be Normal in front of their innocent child.

Waiiiitttt I just woke up I'm crying now 😭😭😭 WHY ARE WE GIVING SNOWDROP A CHILDHOOD TRAUMA NOOOO

🥺 falling asleep crying in his daddy's arms stoppp my heart is breaking poor little baby boy 🥺 taking care of his daddy because he's daddy's personal doctor 🥺🥺🥺

THANKS ANON. THIS WAS SO CUTE AND SWEET AND TRAUMATIZING TO READ FIRST THING IN THE MORNING /lh

[hestzhyen]

Chapter 47 Yaoibachi Posting

Hokazono-sensei really slammed the gas this chapter, man. No search and rescue mini-arc here- just going back to the series' roots by having our good guys slaughter nameless mooks in suits. Excellent decision! But goodness it feels like he's trying to rush through this set-up to get to what he really wants to say this arc. I trust the emotional impact to land so I guess this really is the Kunishige lore/flashback arc since that's where the narrative focus went.

First off, I got the official arc name wrong last post. It's actually The Sword Bearer Assassination Arc. So, uh, maybe don't get too attached to any of the guys Chihiro will be trying to save. Might be difficult though if they're all as endearing as Uruha.

This Fucking Manga, Man

I just can't even this chapter. I CAN'T. I'm sitting here drafting this on Thursday and I'm in awe of the spreads. Cover and color pages? Stunning. Fanservice? Immaculate.

Yes, we got onsen fanservice after all!

Now accepting bets on who Uruha will be shipped with more: his personal guard guy or Kunishige.

Of course it pulls double duty to give us insight into Uruha and, by proxy, Kunishige. I was right on the money about Uruha being a free-spirited dude with a unique perspective last week... but I didn't imagine he'd basically be a wholesome AF version of Sojo. The Kunishige worship from this guy is off the fucking charts (and so are the Hakuri-Chihiro parallels)!

"This blade suits you" from Kunishige is a callback to Hakuri's words to Chihiro in chapter 20. I love it when authors do this shit. Can we infer that Chihiro felt the same level of awe for Hakuri? Probably not, but he did need to hear that affirmation quite badly, so it's still significant.

You don't get to comment on other guys being weirdly obsessive over a Rokuhira on sight like that, Hakuri.

THESE DUMBASS GOOBERS. Poor Chihiro's still collecting weirdos while Hakuri has no self-awareness at all. I'm in tears this is just too good. Hakuri, I love you. You're perfect.

I don't wanna get hyped after just one chapter for something that probably won't be happening. I get just about everything wrong week after week anyway! But I wouldn't mind Chihiro and Hakuri's relationship being compared to and developed through Uruha and Kunishige, just sayin'... Please... Hokazono-sensei went through the trouble of making sure we know that Uruha is obviously meant to parallel Hakuri, so that won't go to waste right?!

TFW the light of your life dies and leaves you behind.

'Cause this feels like a set up... I don't know, man. It's impossible to guess how the story's going to go but I get the sense that Uruha is going to have a lot to teach both of these guys- Hakuri in particular.

Neither Hakuri nor Uruha put a lot of value on their own lives until a Rokuhira showed up to praise them. And they're both freakishly devoted to the image of their savior to the point that they're willing to fight and possibly die for them. So we could be exploring that aspect of Hakuri's mindset as a subplot while the larger machinations swirl around them, since it's a pretty potent character flaw and all. I need Sazanami "defend to the death" Hakuri being convinced to give a shit about himself so, so badly.

Goddamnit, please stop hurting yourself.

Hakuri's also unable to use Isou due to burnout, as expected. Still wondering if the Kamunabi knows he can use two sorcery techniques but I won't hold my breath on getting answers for that. It's not necessary for this to be addressed unless it would cause some kind of friction, after all. And for as much as I would like to see the council's reaction to Hakuri and his circumstances, I don't think it'll be relevant. We'll just have to assume they either don't know his last name or are completely fine with a Sazanami being included in the plans. I wanna be wrong though. I really do.

Contract, Powerscaling, and Naming Conventions

We learned some interesting things this chapter. One, the theory of the Lifelong Contract erasing a Bearer's innate sorcery is confirmed. So if we are ever going to learn what Chihiro's sorcery is, Enten will have to be an exception to the other six swords, or he has two sorceries and the contract only nullifies one. I'm not sold on the second one since Hakuri only overworked the storehouse but is limited using both of his, implying there's a common pool of spirit energy they draw from. Looking forward to more details on how this works!

It also seems that the Bearers weren't tucked away in "safe" locations until Kunishige's death three years ago. So they probably got to live their lives as they wished until the Hishaku ruined things... which would explain how Sushi guy ended up at a restaurant. I feel like each location could have special meaning to each Bearer so hopefully we see more about how and why they ended up where they did.

Hiyuki also wasn't lying about the Kamunabi's forces being spread thin. Just 14 talented sorcerers to defend each Bearer, and even then Uruha would have felt more reassured if Azami or Hiyuki was there.

Nice going, Azami! So we know you're hella strong since Hiyuki's the best fighter in the Kamunabi- the only one in the force who can contend with Kunishige's WMDs (ch. 18). I think a Bearer would know how strong an enchanted blade is, so we can assume that Uruha's assessment of Azami's strength is accurate. Azami can't be sent out on the ground like the rank and file as a higher up now, but I'm highly anticipating him demonstrating that fearsome sorcery of his.

We also got another name! Kuregumo's original bearer was named Misaka (巳坂). This is most probably a family name like Uruha (more on him in a bit). 巳 (mi) means "snake" for wisdom and intelligence and 坂 (saka) means "slope/hill" or "embankment" for steady progress, a peaceful life, security, and/or strength and resilience. We'll definitely learn more about them- it's just a matter of when. The upside of Hokazono-sensei being stingy with names is that we all know to sit up and pay attention when one gets dropped.

We also got Uruha's given name this chapter (Youji [洋児]) and the name of his blade (Kumeyuri [酌揺]). Strange names for a strange fellow, but that's expected of someone whose family name implies a free-spirited nature with a unique outlook I guess. 洋 (you) is a kanji that specifically describes the ocean in an expansive, almost foreign sense. Not just the sea in general, but vast waters extending far away from one's current location. It has a ton of possible interpretations, naturally: courage, ambition, adaptability, limitless possibilities, harmony, inclusiveness... on and on. 児 (ji) means "child" in a straightforward way and carries connotations of joy, hope, and potential. So Uruha Youji [lacquer feather ocean child] is quite the character in his name alone.

Kumeyuri's name doesn't really give us any insights into it's potential abilities or theme, unless Kunishige was drunk (or wanted to be) when he made it. 酌 (kume) is the kanji used for pouring sake and implies generosity, abundance, and celebrating joy. 揺 (yuri) means to shake, sway, or jostle and connotes a sense of energy, playfulness, enthusiasm, and fun. I'm getting a lot of entertainment value trying to imagine how a sword named after a shaky pour of sake works, let me tell you. Somehow it seems very apt for Uruha already though.

Dead Dad Trivia

So Kunishige himself requested to hold on to the blades- it's very certain now that whatever happened during the war changed him into the man we met in chapter 1. Seitei war flashbacks please, I'm dying over here! But keep up the layering and scattering of little details! Don't feed me too fast! Make me wait and get all impatient every week! Torture me-

Curious that many people who seem to have known Kunishige doubted his potential as a father. Whether they see him as a savior or a selfish prick, most of them scoff a the idea of him having a kid. Maybe Kunishige was just a guy with layers like his son, so only those who actually knew him well would believe he could be a decent dad. We saw him goofing off with Shiba and Azami when they were Chihiro's age in chapter 12 so it's not like he was a stoic since birth (he said himself that Chihiro inherited that trait from his mom). We're going to slowly piece together the real Kunishige this arc and I can't wait!

Also a bit odd that few people see the resemblance between Chihiro and Kunishige until Chihiro's passion shines through or they get a good look at how he carries himself. Won't hang my hat on the blood test showing that Kunishige wasn't his bio dad after all, but the groundwork is there if it does. Regardless of what happens, though, it's pretty obvious that Chihiro is Kunishige's son thanks to the ideals he took to heart.

Hishaku Theory

RIP bandanna guy you were too cool to live.

Yeah, "enemies of the state" isn't a term you use for a regular criminal gang, no matter how threatening they are. I'm more convinced than ever that the Hishaku are primarily a political threat to all of Japan (though still very willing to admit that I might be reading too far into things).

Kyora's conversation with an unknown Hishaku member in chapter 22 referred to "dissidents". That's also a very pointed descriptor for people with differing political ideologies, especially ones agitating against the "legitimate" ruling group.

Could Soya come back to finish what his dad started? Meh.

This implies that Kyora and the Sazanami clan were aligned with the Hishaku's goals beyond merely business. The Hishaku probably have sympathizers in and outside of mainstream society, and likely within the Kamunabi itself as well. And then there's the kiku flower -which has strong ties to Imperial imagery- in the vase that's shown up twice now, arraigned alongside other flowers symbolizing deep desire and patience.

So I think the Hishaku lost the war and have been plotting their comeback for a long time now. How does this tie into Chihiro's personal journey beyond the revenge mission? We'll have to see. John Hishaku's goals and methods are shrouded in secrecy right now, so I look forward to learning about why he needed to foster Chihiro's hatred to enact his plans. Cool job making the core plot hook so compelling, author-san!

HakuHiro Brainrot

I have to, I'm sorry. This chapter was a godsend.

Give me an inch and I'll run a thousand miles with these two.

Chihiro acknowledging that Hakuri is special! Feels like a very deliberate reference to the language used in Chapter 33, especially by Tenri. Makes sense since Tenri was a parallel of Chihiro's devotion to his father and his legacy.

"Hakuri- my older brother by a year- is different." would have flowed a little better, but it's a clunky sentence no matter what...

The reference was probably made in order to imply that Chihiro sees Hakuri as a brother (or family in general) via the Tenri connection. However, that won't stop me from shipping them romantically because I'm illiterate as fuck.

ANYWAY.

FOOD IMAGERY WITH HAKURI FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE ICE LADY!!

Hakuri's sharing snacks with Chihiro on the train- he feels so safe with his samurai! And this is the first time we've seen Chihiro accept food since he reluctantly (metaphorically) shared dango with Sojo in chapter 17! He's rejected Shiba's offers, provided one-sidedly for Char, resigned himself to connecting to Sojo to understand him, skipped getting ice cream, and missed the gaming session, but he accepted Hakuri's small gesture...! I'M GOING FERAL

Hakuri is canonically the only character Chihiro's accepted emotional comfort and support from since his dad died. On screen so far, at least.

Hakuri, who was deeply traumatized when he last tried to connect with someone, feels secure enough to do it with Chihiro...

Chihiro, who is only at ease with providing comfort, accepts it for the first time from Hakuri...

The first time we see them exchanging the comfort/security visual metaphor is while they're on their own...

And it's just so casual for them to do this...!

I sounded confident when I called Hakuri the heroine of Kagurabachi in that long-ass post I made a few months ago, but... I was actually right?! Hakuri is Chihiro's first and only emotional safe haven. He's got plot-related utility and can hold his own in a fight, but he's not going to be outshining the likes of Chihiro or Hiyuki any time soon. His faith in Chihiro has been his most valuable contribution to the story- even moreso than awakening to his storehouse ability. The only thing that's missing at this point is the chance of HakuHiro being canon! Seriously!

Alright void... thanks for letting me yap again. Definitely not going to go back to writing fan fiction for the first time in 10+ years because this stupid edgy sword manga broke me. Nope, never, not me...

[sanders1665]

Childhood memories.

It was such an ordinary and unremarkable life back then,

The kind you only truly appreciate once it’s gone.

"It's grim up north," they used to say on T.V.,

But I have cheerful memories of roast beef Sundays

And fish-and-chip Fridays wrapped in yesterday’s newsprint.

We lived in terraced houses with chimneys that coughed into the gray sky,

Where the toilet was in the back yard, beside the coal shed,

And the coalman’s boots left black trails once a week

As he filled our bins for the living room fire.

Milk bottles clinked on the doorstep each morning,

Their foil tops pecked open by sparrows,

And on Friday and Saturday nights, we stayed up late,

Gathered around the fire, watching our dad make toast

On a long fork, while Mum buttered each slice.

Old men roamed the streets with horse-drawn carts,

Shouting “Rag bone!” or “Any old iron!”

We played hopscotch on pavements cracked with time,

Skipping rope or kicking tin cans down cobbled streets,

The clatter echoing like a rhythm of childhood freedom.

Follow-the-leader was our favorite game,

Leaping fences, scaling walls,

And darting through alleys with wild abandon.

Wholesome mischief marked our days,

And we froze mid-step if an old codger bellowed,

"I’ll tell your parents!"

Summer meant chasing the chime of the ice cream van,

Begging Mum for pennies to buy a swirl of joy.

Grandma stayed every other month,

Her visits punctuated by whispered talk of rows with Grandad.

Sometimes, I stayed with them in their little house down the street,

Where Grandma let me brush her hair

And Grandpa taught me cursive,

Patiently guiding my hand as he unraveled the mystery of time.

I only later realized why we often stopped at the cemetery—

To visit their parents and theirs before them.

I thought we were just walking; I never knew we were remembering.

When the streetlights flickered on, it was time to go home.

I can still hear my father’s voice booming through the alleys,

Calling my name into the evening echo.

Brass bands marched on Sundays,

Their music halting our play as we watched in awe.

I was ten when I had my first kiss,

On a beach in Hastings,

Where Harold fell to William long before I was born.

There were pigeons everywhere back then,

Starlings and sparrows too,

And the world seemed coated in feathers and bird shit.

It rained so often, I almost thought the gray sky permanent,

And we bundled up in layers, jackets over jumpers over t-shirts,

Our breath misting in the cold air.

Fights with other boys were inevitable,

Knuckles bloodied, eyes blackened,

But always ending in a tearful retreat

To Mum’s shoulder,

Where she comforted and scolded in equal measure.

Dad came home from work with treats in hand,

Toffees jumbled in a paper bag,

Or fresh pastries from the Crusty Cob.

Mum’s slippers, always ready,

Were not just for warmth but for discipline,

Her aim as sharp as her tongue.

Most of our clothes came secondhand or from empty houses,

Treasures scavenged by Dad in his wanderings.

Our town had a zoo where I saw lions and elephants,

And a speedway where engines roared alongside banger racers.

School was ancient and creaked with the weight of history,

Its gothic halls echoing with nuns’ stern voices.

One dared smack my knuckles for asking too many questions,

But the spark of curiosity could not be silenced.

On a school trip to Lytham St. Anne’s,

I broke my collarbone sliding down a wet hill,

And fell for the Irish teacher who nursed my wounds.

Bath nights meant tin tubs by the fire,

The water warmed on the gas stove,

And steam mingling with the scent of coal smoke.

Fifty years have passed,

But these memories remain bright,

Glimpses of a life both simple and profound.

We had little,

But it was enough—always enough.

We didn’t know we were poor,

Because everyone lived the same.

Looking back now, I realize:

Happiness is not in what we lack,

But in what we treasure.

[sinnaea]

I started a new Weskertine fic

I just had to get this fic out of my brain. It's been living in there rent free for over a year. I'm not sure where I'm gonna take this in the future. Maybe more on the wholesome or dramatic side. But here is a page 1 draft. Enjoy 💜

Jill Valentine tried her hardest to push down that burning lump traveling up her esophagus. The shakiness in her body rattled the pen in her hand against the police report she had been trying to fill out for the last twenty minutes. And the sweat rising from her pores from that gradually growing nausea since waking that morning clung heavily to her skin. She shut her eyes, wetting the dryness, and hoped that none of her teammates in the office noticed her sickly appearance. She would rather not have the attention of the entire S.T.A.R.S. team at this moment.

The veteran officer was headstrong and sometimes even stubborn. Being the first female on the elite force, Jill refused to be overshadowed by anyone. And she was successful at grabbing the attention she desired. But she didn’t want this kind.

The nausea was becoming unbearable and Jill finally realized she could not hold down the fort and it was time to retreat. Despite her stubbornness, she always knew the smart time to move. She shot up from her desk and quickly marched toward the office door. The women’s restroom was at the end of the hall and, according to her calculations, she would be able to make her destination. But her body had other plans. Before she could even reach for the door knob, that burning lava in her throat nearly erupted from her mouth. Luckily, a small trash bin rested beside the door and she dove for it, spewing liquid onto discarded papers.

The sound of quiet worry and the approaching footsteps of the other officers could be heard behind Jill. She groaned, upset with herself, and sputtered a little more into the bin. She took a moment to catch her breath, then caught a glimpse to her right. The door to Captain Albert Wesker’s private office was open and he stared at her, frozen yet concerned.

“Shit,” she cursed under her breath, then immediately hurled and coughed into the bin once more.

“Jill?” The quiet and sweet voice of the team’s medic Rebecca Chambers hovered behind her.

“I’m fine,” Jill forced out and wiped one corner of her mouth with the back of her gloved hand. “Probably just some bad milk from the coffee shop.” She planted a boot firmly on the floor and struggled to even stand. Her head throbbed and entire body shivered uncontrollably.

Noticing this, Rebecca promptly hooked her arm underneath Jill’s to help support her. “You’re not fine,” she stated. “We’re going to the sickroom.”

Jill sat upright on a firm examination table with a thermometer dangling in her mouth. She internally shook her head from embarrassment as she observed the rookie medic time a minute on her wristwatch. Jill didn’t know much about Rebecca outside of work. Regardless of the medic’s sweet and caring nature, what Jill did know was that Rebecca knew her shit. Willful like the veteran in that regard.

The minute was over and Rebecca pulled the thermometer from Jill’s mouth and looked at the reading. “No fever which is good,” the rookie said with relief and smiled. “But I can still give you some medicine to help with the nausea. I think we also have some vitamins to replenish what you lost.” She turned toward one of the cabinets and started to rummage through the various bottles and medical aid.

The pounding in Jill’s head grew even worse as if she had just been punched and she felt like hurling again. She gritted her teeth, biting the bullet, knowing whatever Rebecca was going to prescribe wasn’t going to ease the uncertainty in her mind.

The medic turned back around with two medicine bottles in her hands and faced Jill. “Just drink lots of water and rest here until you’re ready, okay?”

Jill dug deep, nose scrunching, and exhaled sharply. “Rebecca, I need to ask you a favor,” she said suddenly. “But you have to promise not to tell anyone.”

Taken aback, but willing to aid, Rebecca nodded with furrowed brows. “Yeah, of course. What do you need?”

Jill swung her legs off the examination table, hunched forward a little toward Rebecca and gave her a serious glare. “I need you to get something for me from the pharmacy.” Her voice was hushed despite being in a private room.

Rebecca glanced toward the cabinets. “I’m sure I have something here-“

“No,” Jill interrupted then let out an anxious chuckle. “It’s not here. Trust me.” She quickly reached for a pen and notepad from the counter, scribbled something nearly desperately and handed it to the rookie. “I need this.”

Rebecca’s eyes grew slightly bigger at the notepad and swallowed. “Oh!”

[messenger-of-stupidity]

NAH NAH NAH

Okay. Let's go through the thoughts of this latest update. There's a lot so buckle up buttercup.

1. Kravitas is literally so based. He's willing to spare Albus the suffering of long travel just because he's bored when typically he would enjoy Albus suffering.

2. Only Albus would risk insanity to spite a demon. Ever heard of cutting off your nose to spite your face, Albus? Seriously, these dude shot himself out of a fucking canon to stop Devlin from touching this hella cursed sword, but in typical Albus fashion when it's his safety and emotional welfare at stake common sense flies out the gods be damned window.

4. Is Kravitas really a demon or was his statement last episode about being more than that the truth that Albus just chose to call bullshit on?

5. Kerano, sweetie, if you don't like the sweater you don't gotta be nice to me and lie. Tis okay

6. Dad is back with his video of a casual demon attack. A normal Thursday. You'd think violence could slow enough for Faithful to get some groceries but I guess not.

7. AN ADULT TALK? EXCUSE ME? also yes now shoo child.

8. Guess I'll just go in a bunker and braid some hair or some shit. Whatever.

9. Don't you love it when the father figure of your child is so obsessed with transformers that he turns into a robot? (Yes I know he didn't turn into a robot. It just sounded kind of robotic in my head and it was funny.

10. What's the song called? It was kind of a vibe.

11. Oh my God we're raising a menace, thief, AND a liar. Where did we go wrong? 😭 Also can Faithful read minds? She was able to hear Kerano's mind about a key or something before Kerano had it, and was able to read the thoughts after that.

12. Move aside, Faithful is coming through like a badass. Hold the child

13. Oh neat. Both Albus and I have yelling voices in our head. 🥲

14. "I AM THE GREATEST GOOD YOURE EVER GONNA GET" - Faithful 2023

15. IS HE CUTTING OFF HIS HAND?! KERANO LOOK AWAY

16. Are... Are you seriously gonna make me choose between my two husbands right now? WHERES MY POLY OPTION? (Albus and Devlin in strictly familial relationship with each other. No condoning incest here)

-Branch-

Albus Route:

- yeah u tell him Devlin! How dare he try to reject us after saying it was our choice. Bitch

- UH I UH UHM ER

- daddy? Sorry. Daddy? Sorry. Daddy? Sorry

- HOW MANY ROUNDS? Albus let her BREATHE before you fuck her to death omg

- I thought we became a bio mom to half demon children. But nah turns out we became a slutty saint

- YOOOO another thing in common with Albus! We both don't like kids. For different reasons but the point still remains

- Awww. He misses Devlin.

- Kerano is wholesome but I ain't forgiving her for snatching that key

- wait does anyone remember when he said he wouldnt tap faithful with a ten foot pole? Does that mean he tapped her with an eleven foot pole to stay true to his word?

- Devlin Route -

- that's what your brother said to me in an alternate reality when I chose him too.

- Albus back with the orgies. My angsty brain McThinks it's some copium since that's his whole "nothing hurts me!" Mask

- "HES A ROCKIN SPACE AGE BACHELOR MAN" I hope he gets his dream of being a monsterfucker

- Faithful got that holy rizz sheeeeeeesh

- astrology 🥰

- wait nevermind. Just some brotherly love

- you can call me darling any day of the week baby. I am living for it.

- Awww starry kiss. 🥹

Update: I keep forgetting there's a high chance that GBA will see this... BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?! I STAND BY WHAT I SAID (/lh) 😤😤😤

Update #2: for those asking about the third route thoughts, that's a secret that I'm saving for a fic.

[kaiandels]

Two Hearts (finale): e.w x reader

warnings: none! calm chapter completely wholesome but kind of short ig?

writer’s note: this will be the last chapter. this is not intense so do not expect anything !! and sorry if it took so long.. when i say i’m busy with uni, i am. NOT PROOFREAD!

part 1- part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7

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Love is a confusing thing. Not everyone is blessed enough to feel this concept. You have always thought that you were incapable of doing so, that you weren't worthy. 'Cause all you felt in this life that you have lived was nothing but rejection which made you dense to the feeling of Love. And you knew, that Ellie was the same. You both were looking for the same thing. And it felt so good that you both were able to provide it for each other.

"In this life I have done nothing but love you." Ellie whispered.

The denial that was evident throughout was just a decoy for the intense love that couldn't be displayed. You both were cowards. You didn't accept the risk of losing someone who you spent your whole life with just because you loved them more than a friend should love another. Love is a confusing thing. You hoped to God that it would change for the better.

It did. It seemed like the whole world revolved around you and her only. You were deprived of love, Ellie knew that. Ever since you were a child you have done nothing but try to get the constant approval of your parents. You had done nothing but try to achieve the academic goals or even the career goals for no one but them and them only. The love that was lacking throughout your life, was provided by Ellie. And the love that was lacking through hers, were provided by you.

You were going to meet up with Joel, you had just put on something casual as the planned set-up would only be in a café. You decided to not outdone yourselves because you wanted the ambiance to be just perfect to announce you and Ellie’s relationship. To be completely honest, you were a nervous wreck. And Ellie didn’t seem to get that at all. But, the things that ran through your mind was just “what if he doesn’t like me for Ellie?” or “what if he thinks that i’m too full of myself?”

You gulped as you blankly stared at the mirror, your gaze travelling up and down your body as you were so unsure of how presentable you wanted to be. “You’re fine.” Ellie broke the silence as she stood behind you, her arms crossed. “Why are you so nervous? You’ve been with Joel ever since we were 5.” Ellie asked as she looked at you in to the mirror. “I don’t know. What if he doesn’t like me for you? I mean I wasn’t the best child at all, he always scolded me when we would play in the backyard and- what if hejustdoesntlikemeforyoubecauseimnotthegirlwhoheseesyouwith?” You rambled as your hands went their ways through the air as Ellie stared at you dumbfoundedly. Is that even a word? It’s probably possible ‘cause that’s the way Ellie’s feeling right now.

“You’re doing too much, seriously.” Ellie laughed as she stepped closer to you to hug you from behind. “You’re going to be okay. Like I said, you’ve known him your whole life.” You sighed at the reassurance as you melted under her embrace. You nodded as you accepted your “faith”.

A few hours later, you and Ellie had arrived to the café. You both got out the car, laughing as you both noticed that your breaths both hitched. You looked at eachother as Ellie pointed at the window, you followed her direction and saw Joel sitting quietly at the booth, reading a newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. He never changed. You thought.

You and Ellie walked in the café hand in hand as you both walked up to Joel. “Hey..” Ellie said almost whispering as she caught Joel’s attention. “Hey kiddo. Oh have I missed ya.” Joel claimed giving Ellie an excited shit-eating grin. He stood up as he gave Ellie a tight hug, ruffling her hair in the process. “Fuck- JOEL!” Ellie groaned as they both laughed.

You stood there, admiring the two as your heart melted. You wished that you could feel like that again, but the last time you ever felt that way was when you were 8 years old. “Hey Y/n.” Joel said as he walked up to you and gave you a fast and soft hug. You always were awkward with eachother. “Hey Joel” You said giving him a soft smile. Ellie snorted, catching you and Joel’s attention. “Come on, you guys.” Ellie said patting the empty space beside her. You looked at Joel and he nodded giving you the empty spot next to Ellie’s as he sat in front of you both.

“Look, Joel. A lot has happened this past few months or years and i’m really happy to see you but… I have to tell you something.” Ellie said straightforwardly gripping at your hand under the table. “Throw it at me, kiddo.” Joel said as he smiled and leaned back against the booth couch. “Me and Y/n are together.” you all went silent as you looked at Ellie and Joel. It went quiet as it seemed like they were both trying to win a staring contest. Not until the silence was broken by Joel’s laughter. “Kiddo, that’s nothing new to me! I thought you both were already together before I left the goddamn country.” Joel said as he snorted laughing too hard at Ellie’s face. You observed Ellie as she had her mouth agape and staring blankly at Joel. “Oh, fuck you.” Ellie spat as they both laughed. “I’m happy for y’all. Really.” Joel reassured as he looked at you. “I never knew you had it in ya.” You blushed in embarassment as you gripped at Ellie’s arm. She chuckled and kicked Joel’s foot. “Sorry, sorry.. I was just sayin’ “

“It must be hard for ya, since ya know.. your parents.” Joel spoke hesitantly as he tried to look for any expressions on your face that were a sign of discomfort. There weren’t any. “I moved out a couple of years ago and I haven’t contacted them since.” You smiled as you fiddled with your hands. “That must’ve felt horrible, i’m so sorry to have brought it up kiddo.” Joel smiled.

“I think you’re great for Ellie. Really.” Your eyes widened as you realized the contradiction of what you had just said earlier and snapped your gaze directly at Ellie’s. Ellie smirked and gave you a look telling you “I told you so”.

“I have seen none in this life that I saw better for Ellie.” You softly smiled as you looked at Joel, waiting for him to continue his sentence. “I know that I might have not made you feel like I liked you, especially when you were a kid. But I know that no one made Ellie happier than you. I know you’re a great person, y/n.”

“And I know that ya might not have felt like you’ve been accepted. But i’m always here to also stand as your father. Ya know that right? I’m not always showy. Even Ellie knows that.” Ellie chuckled as she nodded. “Just know that i’ve always treated you as my own, babygirl.” Joel nodded as he reached for your hand. Tightly gripping it. “Oh, come on now. Don’t be a sap.” Ellie interrupted as you all shared laughters again.

“I am genuinely happy though.” Joel nodded as he both looked at you and Ellie. “You both are perfect for eachother.”

After the meeting, you felt euphoric. You were so glad that Joel loved you. But then again, there were no reason for him not to. Your behavior when you were a child was nothing compared to now, he admired your growth as a person and you knew that you would influence Ellie greatly.

“I love you.” Ellie blurted out. You looked at her with a confused look.

“I love you too. What’s wrong?” You chuckled as you seemed taken aback by the sudden exchange of iloveyou’s.

“I don’t know. I just felt like I haven’t said that enough.” Ellie looked down at her feet, fiddling with her hands. You frowned as you took a step close to Ellie, pulling her in to your embrace. “I just feel like I have wasted all these years in my life being a coward instead of feeling your touch and love like how i’m doing right now.”

You sighed as you cupped Ellie’s cheeks. “It’s not only you to blame you know? I was dumb too.” You laughed as you felt Ellie’s body soften with your touch.

You were in that verge too. You wanted to blame yourself for not accepting yourself sooner but you were still glad that you did anyway. You were happy that even though in the most darkest times… Like the times that you would ignore her because you were jealous or because you just didn’t want to talk to her because you were having another one of your crisis. She was still there. And it was selfish, you knew that. But you were glad that she was still there for you to claim as yours.

You could’ve never found that love for Xavier. He was just one of your facades that you had to escape to find the true happiness within. It was Ellie. And it will always forever be Ellie.

In this society, Lesbians have been nothing but fetishized. Always stereotyped to the point that you were scared of the oppression you had to face.

And that’s the thing you have always been scared of, society. It always seemed like it was you vs. 7 billion people in this world. But the truth is? you’re not alone. And in fact, you’ll never be.

You wish you could’ve just been like Ellie, she came out as a free woman without giving a fuck. And she always had that fighting spirit within that you wish you could achieve. But you knew deep inside that she was also struggling as much as you.

If loving you wasn’t considered as a sin, I would’ve loved you to my full potential.

If loving you wasn’t a part of being condemned, I would’ve married you and took you to the aisle of my favorite church and prayed that we would be eternal.

If loving you wasn’t wrong, I would’ve realized that it was you all along. And I wouldn’t have to be with someone that I knew I didn’t want.

I’ve lived with two hearts, the other one was loving you and the other one was pretending that I didn’t.

[fictionfixations]

on laughter-silvered wings by ThatOnePlatypus | HP x KHR | Harry-is-Skull

It's a Harry Potter x Katekyo Hitman Reborn series, where of course, Harry is Skull. I found it very relaxing to read, and it's probably gonna have a special place in my heart as one of those really wholesome and fluffy and funny moments (especially with the second work. moments just for the sake of moments. no crazy stuff, not necessarily any progression or big stuff, but like. very enjoyable.) its different from like, when i run into a really good story (that's probably a long one) and get attached to characters. i basically live and breathe in the same world? its different. but it was honestly a breath of fresh air in comparison to the many 'harry is skull angst' because of the arcobaleno treating him like shit? and while i am all for bashing of any kind, sometimes its just. nice to just not pay it any mind? and focus on bonds and stuff like that.

it felt like. it could be a way of moving on, i guess? like there's been many iterations of harry potter i've seen. and it could've very easily had a grieving harry, but no its become more then that. and i really appreciate that? and i adored it.

not lingering too much on the sad parts. not necessarily moving forward and past that but like, not letting it drag you down. not letting it make or break your world. it was nice.

[seigephoenix]

Hello, happy DADWC! For a prompt, for your Aldwir/Bellara, may I submit: Snuggling during a rain storm

Happy DADWC! This one does contain minor spoilers for Bellara's storyline so I'll be putting it under a cut! Proceed with caution if you haven't gotten far in Bellara's personal quests.

Content Warning: spoilers abound, wholesome romance, Finn is a good boyfriend Length: ~500 words

Finn ducked under the archway of the ruin after securing the perimeter of their camp.  He’d intended to take Bellara to Arlathan to help ease her mind after what happened to her brother.  He was no good with comforting words or words in general, but he still wanted to do something to show her that she could rely on him.  He saw her staring into the fire blankly, her mind was already a million miles away.  His heart hurt for her and what she was going through.  He wanted to strangle that bastard, and Finn vowed to hunt Anaris down if it came down to it.  He’d call in a favor from his mother to find the demented elf.

“Hey,” Finn murmured as he knelt next to Bellara.  He felt the moment she came back, the way her body tensed slightly before relaxing.  “I checked for enemies; we should be good.”  He eased down beside her, staring into the fire as well.  The sound of the rain was comforting in way Finn hadn’t expected.  Of all the weird shit happening in the world and everything they were facing, some things never changed.

“Oh, you didn’t have to do that.  I would have helped.  I mean, I’d do my best.” Bellara started when Finn covered her hand with his.  She felt the burning in her eyes at the gentle squeeze but she vowed not to cry anymore.  Not until they found Cyrian again.  “Rook.”

“Bellara.”  Finn tilted his head when she turned to him with an exasperated look on her face.  “Come on.  Dwelling on it isn’t doing you any favors.  And I know it sounds trite when I say it, but let’s try to get your mind away from it all.”

“You’re right.  It’s just hard,” she admitted linking their fingers together.  She was shocked when Finn tugged hard and she landed on top of him.  “Rook!”

“Relax.” Finn wrapped his arms around her, locking her into place as he settled back against the bedroll.  He grinned when she tried to pull away.  “Nope.  Not going to escape this time, Miss Lutare.”  He kissed her temple, grinning as she muttered at him in their shared language.  “I know what that means too.”

“Good.” Bellara huffed and struggled to relax.  She rested the side of her face against his chest, startling herself when she heard his heart.  It was racing the same way hers was.  For some reason, that comforted her more than anything else.  He was as nervous as she was.  She relaxed into his chest, letting her worries fall away from her mind as she focused on the moment.  It was difficult as her mind wanted to throw itself in a million different directions, but she forced herself to live in the moment.  The sound of the rain hitting the stone above their heads, the sound of Finn’s heart under her ear, and the way his breathing remained steady.  His body heat warmed her and his arms kept her safe.  She never felt that kind of security before, not with anyone else.  She closed her eyes and laid her hand on Finn’s arm.  “I’m glad I’m here with you Finn.”

[therhythmafterthesummer]

Hello my dearest rhythm, I am back with my (still messy) thoughts on FPS part 2 🥹

First of all, i had to reread it cuz the first time that i saw it was after a day (or days) of hectic training when i just wanted to shut off my brain but i saw that u updated and my whole world sTOPPED, i swear i held my breath and thought i was hallucinating the new part 😭 i’ve been waiting for it for so long and it’s definitely worth it 🥹😭

I might babble a lot about it so if anyone hasn’t read it, pls don’t read this cuz it will have spoilers 😭

I WAS NOT PREPARED TO EXPERIENCE THE CONFLICT IN HIS HEAD WHEN THE REVEAL HAPPENED 😭😭😭😭😭 literally, i was holding my breath,, i wanted to cry too 🥹 MY BABIES, why should the world make them meet like that 😭 they just wanted to love and be loved huhu i hate u (i love u so much pls i know it hurt u too). Knowing everything that was going on in his head, gosh, I’m so crushed. I want to hold him and tell him it’s okay because he didn’t know it was her 😭 akshjsdjjdskbsjsjx

“The fact that you wouldn’t take his life puzzled him. How could you not want him dead? After all that had transpired, why wouldn’t you?” ——BECAUSE I LOVE YOU GOD DAMMIT 😭🤕🥹 

“and if you’d been fine with it, he wanted to ask you to move in with him.” —nO WAIT STOP PLS,😭 i’m beyond wrecked and i haven’t even gone thru half of the story yet.

The flashback to their first date 🥺🥺🥺 i wanna scream. Knowing how both of their lives were filled with chaos, them being able to find peace and comfort with each other is just sooooo wholesome. WHICH HURTS EVEN MORE WHEN I REALIZE ITS JUST A FLASHBACK——brb gonna go sob in a corner. “If I tried to kiss you… would you let me?”——😭😭😭😭😭i love love love how they get so spontaneous and relaxed with each other. I love how you wrote about it between the lines of their stressfully calculated and rigid line of work 🥹

3 freakin’ months of no contact 😭 i wonder what happened to MC then. Although you did write a bit about her forfeiting her mission and also, technically, her spot in the Guild, I wonder what she was thinking after everything. Three months is a (kind of) long time, and I guess like Chris, she would’ve been wondering all of her what-if’s. Did she ever think about contacting him too? Did she ever considered his side of the story? idk i’m just hurting with them at this point.

—i’m gonna skip the reunion but just know that i screamed and held my breath and punched the wall and banged my head on the desk and— yeah

The honesty and vulnerability between them is just so pure. The way they both pined for normalcy with each other is just *chef’s kiss* 🤍 i love them so much, it hurts how much shit they went thru even before they met 🥺 i’m not gonna spoil much about the rest of the story but i just want you to know that i loooove how you wrote them. Their stories feel so real to me and their emotions were very well conveyed. I love how the story went and, to be honest, i don’t think i mind the ending being open as much as I initially thought. (tho i wouldn’t complain if ur brain lizard decides otherwise— 👀)

Aaaahck my babies 🤍🖤 thank you for publishing this new part!! I hope you have a really nice day :> hugs!!

~🍓

plssss this is so detailed kjfhsdjfshfdkijsjikd

that whole first scene recounting the reveal from his POV hurt me more than you can imagine. every time i sat down to write this story i felt like my heart was being squeezed (which was exactly what i was looking for sdjfhskdfh). Chris really just wanted to have that bit of peace he had with his girlfriend and it was ripped away from him ))):

as for what happened on the MC's side during those three months... i'm sure she almost called him several times, but, just like Chris, i don't think she was ready to face him. she had hurt him and tried to kill him (before she knew it was him, ofc), so she probably had to process all that, plus the fact that she couldn't finish her mission at all (which i'm sure was a whole different problem in itself). essentially, both her heart and her pride was hurt, and, honestly, if she hadn't heard those people talking about picking up her failed mission, i feel like she wouldn't have reached out at all (or at least not that "soon").

everything that happened at Chris' flat after they met again was very therapeutic to write for some reason??? idk, i feel like i was able to let a lot of feelings out writing this story in general, so i'm glad some of those feelings were conveyed well.

i really wanted to leave the ending a bit open so the reader could interpret what could happen next. they could run away together, one of them could retire, Chris could try to get the Kims to pardon her, or (for those that want a bit more angst) maybe you can even imagine she is deceiving him still, trying to fulfil her goal and that's why she came back... the possibilities are endless atp haha. all i know for sure is that i wanted to end this story with them together, so i did!

thank you for reading this, and for your thorough feedback. i'm glad you liked it💜💜💜

[misdre]

back to business, continuation of me re-reading gideon the ninth! this is the sixth post! which! is! my favourite number! haha!

aooowww i didn't remember the fourth died so grotesquely :( isaac is left to die alone in the dark… i'm sad. and gideon got to have these wholesome connections for the first time in her life and they last a total of couple of days before the people all start to die. insert a sad kity meme image

i'm feeling kinda fucked up about these characters in general atm like jeannemary mentions it was their first time leaving the fourth house, obviously gideon's first time leaving the ninth house, and i'm not sure if all the rest have ever left theirs either before? so the first time they get out, some of them experience real sunlight and weather for the first time and thinking they're off to maybe the grandest thing of their lives, and then… they are either killed or taken to increasingly traumatising locations afterwards. these space stations are moderated to constantly have the perfect temperature etc, well the sixth canonically is at least and then they get tossed to this ass hot planet in NTN for example. the fuck does that feel like. or even just living in a normal(-ish) house. i don't now really remember if camilla and/or palamedes address this in nona the ninth and that book traumatised me so i'm a little scared of re-reading it i'll be honest, i'm not over paul in fact i feel like every day i am a little more fucked up about paul, oh god i'm digressing uummmm let's get back to re-reading GTN misi we're not at NTN, it's fine breathe in this bag and it's fine

ahahaha…haha….haa….. crying

again looking back in hindsight, cytherea really was just kind of cytherea-ing like, half of the time instead of dulcinea-ing. "I'll probably live forever… worse luck. Whatever happened to one flesh, one end?" insane she just said these things

when your fave casually walks into a scene with "his big black bag of weird shit." (all this intense flirt between gideon and dulcie tho. i sort of hope palamedes at least by now had a hunch she's not the real one because this has all been relentless otherwise)

kind of intrigued by the thought of an AU where silas and gideon actually get along, there's a lot of mad deadpan sass going on. "eat me, milk man" dude i'll come back to this later

GOD i not only love the sixth to death, i just think i might BE from the sixth?? gideon visits their quarters and they got all the windows covered because sunlight yuck (check), their place is messy as fuck (check) covered with books and notes everywhere (check check). she describes their bedroom as a "dark nest" ah i love that. the dark nest of palamedes and camilla with their shared bed. that hits my goth just right

again i'm here squirming with glee over the rival banter that harrowhark and palamedes have going on -- which is, honestly, kind of the more wholesome dynamic here?? i did not remember this book is so… well, laced with drama that's somehow simultaneously low-key and incredibly present at the same time. there's the love triangle of harrowhark trying to tell gideon to not be such a lesbian about dulcinea and gideon accusing her of being jealous (which harrow probably is), but then it's the… love quadrangle about gideon being aware that palamedes also crushes on dulcinea and feels weird about it, but then there are the little hints of a love uuhh love pentagon-- POLYCULE with camilla being fucking ice cold about dulcinea any time she's mentioned in her vicinity (WHICH i love, so much, by the way, jealous clingy camilla is my jam) so the frenemies here with no odd feelings mixed in are harrowhark and palamedes, hence they are surprisingly wholesome. i rest my case. i mean doesn't he hug her in HTN?? i'll continue to call this an underrated duo

the collective "palamedes." moments again GJDSGHBSDHG i find it supremely funny how fucking much he swears all the time, i feel like all the other necromancers are way more solemn and dignified (well... maybe not ianthe.), and he's supposed to be the cultured one but he goes around calling doors dickheads

it's also ANOTHER instance here of gideon the gigantic lesbian saying palamedes is "very nearly good looking" when he smiles (aw) which, if it comes from her, has to be true. i'm sooo dead set on defending palamedes because i've seen incredibly mean takes about him within the fandom and i hate it and am very determined to just love him any moment i can!!! i got so heated about it the other day, i could write a fucking essay on this topic (in true sixth house fashion. peer reviewed) since apparently he's called "too perfect" because he gets to "never be wrong" well like. first of all. he dies so there's that

the eighth house continues to mesmerise me by being so so strange. what am i even reading. gideon calls silas a "tooth-coloured asshole", silas responds by calling her a synonym thesaurus list of words for slave and proceeds to invite her for tea? and she actually goes gdfnjgndfjgdf?? then colum turns out to be this actually kind of a sympathetic guy who cleans the house and parses clothes and… makes tea and… then is like actually this kinda sucks. i kinda hate it here and i hate my stupid fucking pampered asshole uncle's scrawny white ass. i did NOT remember colum being this way, what a delight

when silas tells colum to "leave the semiotics to the sixth" i again tossed a hand over my heart screaming ME! IT'S ME I ACTUALLY AM A SIXTH! damn maybe i should start dressing in grey (though i kinda think i already look like a librarian irl. i even have a pair of book earrings. i once wore them to a bookstore and some random other customer commented on them. i was buying tarot cards)

i knew there was a reason i imagined coronabeth to look like juri arisugawa from utena all throughout originally reading the books. probably started from the scene where gideon finds out she's a swordswoman. i plan to draw her looking like juri by the way because i have the power to do anything

IN SAID SCENE CORONA IS ALSO BITING NABERIUS, YOU TOO SISTER???? the fuck does it even feel like to be naberius. you have two necromancer sisters eating you. and not in a very sexy way. (well each to their own i guess but) on this re-read i'm finding myself more and more confused about what cavaliers really even are, because on one hand they are presented as these noble fighters who are like knights protecting their adepts but a lot of time they seem more like servants than anything noble, and then at least marta, naberius, and colum are some sort of vessels for the necromancers to use for fuel. and it's the sixth, who are friends and SORT of reasonable human beings in this grand scheme of necros and cavs because no fucking way palamedes would ever be literally eating cam (or, well........ WELL YOU KNOW), whom silas calls weird ass rude names gdgdfgldfmkgdfk gkjdgdf "unfinished inbred with his mad dog companion" is how i will call them if one of those "describe your otp in a really bad way" posts comes around again, i'm dead

man this book is intense. i got back to reading it after finishing the empusium which has entire chapters where the main character is just kind of walking around and. some guys are talking irrelevant shit about a random topic that you're almost meant to tune out of as a reader and. and then i come back to GTN and it's BAMBAMBAMBAM scene after scene is bombarding me with so much everything

[luhstories]

 ❝    no   update   on   evelyn   and   michael’s   perilous   love   life   .   i   think   they’re   actively   keeping   stuff   from   me   now   .    ❞   she   confesses   ,   hugging   her   knees   to   her   chest   .   maya   never   thought   she’d   have   such   a   dramatic   life   —   or   at   least   ,   a   disruptive   one   .   her   parents   were   childhood   sweethearts   that   were   squares   ,   for   lack   of   a   better   word   .   she   always   pictured   them   living   boring   lives   and   growing   old   together   while   people   romanticized   the   simplicity   of   their   marriage   .   turns   out   ,   only   recently   had   her   dad   held   a   family   meeting   where   he   came   out   and   confessed   to   infidelity   .   maya   could   only   assume   at   this   point   her   parents   were   getting   a   divorce   .   didn’t   hold   anger   for   her   father   for   coming   out   ,   but   she   didn’t   agree   with   him   cheating   .   her   mother   spiraled   after   that   ,   drinking   and   becoming   more   unpleasant   than   usual   ;   didn’t   help   that   maya   looked   most   like   her   father   so   she   was   a   constant   reminder   to   the   woman   .     the   reminder   that   she   was   an   immigrant   woman   that   was   disowned   by   her   family   for   choosing   love   and   the   american   dream   only   for   it   all   to   be   a   lie   wrapped   up   in   a   man   .   ❝    kind   of   would   suck   less   if   y’know   ,   everyone   didn’t   know   .   fucking   hate   this   gossipy   town   .   now   everyone’s   looking   at   me   weird   and   i   can   just   feel   the   pity   and   all   that   shit   radiating   off   them   .    ❞    takes   a   minute   to   breathe   ,   talking   took   off   a   few   stones   ,   but   she   knew   when   their   little   hangouts   came   to   an   end   ;   more   would   be   added   .    ❝    shit   ,   i’m   sorry   .   how’re   you?   got   anything   to   share   with   the   class   today?    ❞

open :  any  /  21+ plot :  source   .   keep   it   unrequited   maybe  /  platonic   and   wholesome   ,   lol   thanks   .   it’s   suppose   to   be   giving   very   YA   novel   .