#and also for moral support i guess

[metropolisblue]

"your stupid ass BETTER NOT be ponyfying roy harper when i get back THERE"

my stupid ass :

[vaguely-concerned]

there are certainly serious things to say and analysis to be made about the tired queen in snow white-ass female fear of aging and losing your beauty as catalysts for evil tropes zara renata is evoking, as well as the treatment of her still-naked body as an object in the post mortem interrogation scene by both the camera and the characters. HOWEVER. personally and with my heart not my brain I forgive it wholeheartedly because there's just something special, something so incredibly fun and campy, both about her horrific literal blood bath and about a character who'll coyly tell you to wait here she'll just slip into something a little more... comfortable😏. and then while keeping hard eye contact with you she slips out of her skin entirely like it's a strapless dress and stands there in her full glistening subcutaneous glory smirking at you. her body isn't a temple it's a slaughterhouse. well. for you. but that's a price she's willing to pay :) ianthe tridentarius behaviour (laudatory)

(to be real for a moment it probably helps a lot that there are plenty of other female villains in the game who aren't presented with a sexual or appearance-focused angle at all. well. not an intentional one at least. ghilan'nain will always do to certain people what she does but that's not the design intention or priority lol. having a zara does not feel as weird when you also have a johanna hezenkoss running around just living her best unlife and doing her thing)

[dandp]

Girl who can't swim and gets afraid on boats/sometimes just in the water voice: what if I went on vacation to a waterfront rental and go on a long boat tour

[heartual]

why have i woken up like five times since midnight it’s literally only two and i took melatonin too ☹️

[mossistyping]

ahhhhhhh

[the-acid-pear]

I dreamt I went on T... They'd let me have that this year. They'd let me. Please.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

blade gunnblade !!!!!!!!

via eliza simpson:

There are no words for this true warrior. They kill me. MMM: went in for a post show hug. Me:"ow!" Asia: "oh sorry, that's my bullet necklace." 😳........ 😍

[rivilu]

The better I get at crusade management and the midnight fane the worse the end of it is going to hit I can just feel it

[kalashtars]

sometimes I truly genuinely forget nuance is dead on the internet and then I have to read people who should be on the same side argue about politics on the internet and I start wanting to bash my head into a wall.

[princessclefairyberry]

Oh good yet another reason to unfollow and block half of this godforsaken website.

I swear to fuck the only people on this site are:

• Self-important assholes who think they deserve to tell other people how to spend their pitiful amount of leisure time and money

• Hyper-dedicated fandom, aesthetic, or art blogs who post about absolutely nothing else (this is a compliment)

• Whiny pissbabies who think they are owed other people’s hard work (mostly art) for free

• Blogs specialized in one particular political issue (half are safe to follow, the other half will reveal themselves to be violent bigots as soon as they say anything about a topic other than their usual focus; good luck figuring out which it will be ahead of time!)

• Violent bigots who are aware and open about their bigotry

• Violent bigots who have chugged the koolaid so hard that they think they are morally pure in their bigotry

• Literal teenagers who are so afraid of being shunned that they scream incessantly about what good antis they are, despite not being old enough to remember that the term originated as an insult against people being violent to folks who shipped Reylo. Proship was just Reylo antiship was just anti Reylo it’s all just the fucking Star Wars sequels please get a grip I’m fucikign loisng it over here

• Multi-topic personal blogs that aren’t meant to be curated for other people so good luck (valid, me too)

[feralplantwife]

Hot take of the day I guess but Sabrina Carpenter is literally 26 years old. She's not a child star anymore. If she wants to have racy album covers and write songs about having sex with men she doesn't really like or respect, then that's her prerogative and people should shut the fuck up about it.

Nobody whines and cries and kicks up this much fuss when men show women in "compromising" positions or write songs about having sex with women they don't care about. They don't say anything at all. It's just another Thursday.

"It's not progressive"

"it's setting women back"

By doing what? Showing a woman in a sexual context? You can't have feminism or support the feminist movement without including female sexuality in that context. Picking and choosing which parts of feminism you're willing to stand up for and support is not feminism. It's moral policing, and there is absolutely no room for that behavior if you're actually fighting for equity.

Sabrina Carpenter is a woman who has sex with men, and she sings about it and makes album covers about it, and if you have a problem with that, I think you need to sit about and seriously consider why that is.

I see people arguing that it's subversive, and frankly I don't care whether it is or not. That's not the point. It shouldn't matter if it's subversive or not. I also see people saying that Sabrina Carpenter is the most heterosexual thing they've ever seen so they don't care, and again, yes you should! The branches of misogyny and homophobia grow from the exact same fucking roots. Feminist issues and queer issues can't be excluded from each other if they're to be fully understood.

Wishing all women and fems a very Horny On Main Is Fine And Good Even, and I for one look forward to dragging my aroace nonbinary brain through Sabrina's entire discography.

[seumyo]

kenma going to the gym for the sole purpose of being strong enough to lift his daughter whenever she wants.

Kenma Kozume had done a lot of things he never expected in life. But somehow, somehow, the hardest thing he had ever done… was carrying around your four-year-old daughter like she was an accessory strapped to his body.

It started off fine. She was small. Lightweight. Kenma barely noticed it when she’d reach up at him with those big, golden eyes, arms raised expectantly as she said, “Up, Daddy!”

And, of course, like an absolute fool, he always picked her up.

Always.

Now, however, things were different. Kiano was growing.

Which was great! Wonderful, even!

All he ever wanted was a happy wife. Check. And a healthy baby. Check.

Except for the part where she was getting heavier, and Kenma, who had not done a single muscle-related workout since high school volleyball, was starting to feel it. His arms ached. His back tensed up. There were days when, after holding her for too long, he would just sit down at his desk and stare blankly at his keyboard, fingers refusing to move because they were still recovering from holding your daughter for half the day.

“Kenma, you should just go to bed if you’re not feeling well,” you told him when you brought him some midnight snacks.

And your daughter, Kiano, she did not care.

She still reached up, still expected to be carried without hesitation the following morning.

And because Kenma was a weak, weak man, he never said no.

Which was how he found himself at the gym, standing at the front desk with his old gym keycard in hand, while Kuroo Tetsurou of all people stood beside him, grinning like a complete idiot.

“Hold on, hold on,” Kuroo said, leaning against the counter as he processed what was happening. “Let me get this straight. You’re renewing your gym membership—not because you wanna get in shape, not because you had some life-changing revelation, but because your four-year-old daughter is getting too heavy for you?”

Kenma scowled, tossing his gym keycard at Kuroo’s face. “Shut up.”

Kuroo laughed, easily catching it. “Kenma, this is hilarious.”

He exhaled sharply, rubbing his temples as the receptionist processed his renewal.

He knew Kuroo was going to be like this. That was the whole reason he had debated bringing him along in the first place. But Kenma also knew that if he walked into a gym alone after years of avoiding them, he would probably just stand in the corner, regret all his life choices, and leave without doing anything.

He needed moral support. Unfortunately, that support came in the form of Kuroo, who was currently laughing at his pain.

“It’s not that funny,” Kenma grumbled.

Kuroo shot him a look. “Kenma, you literally built your entire brand on being an indoors guy. And now you’re out here, willingly lifting weights, all because your tiny daughter says ‘Up, Daddy’ and you can’t say no to her.”

Kenma refused to make eye contact.

Because yeah, that was… basically the situation.

The receptionist handed back his renewed membership card, smiling. “Welcome back, Mr. Kozume! Need a trainer, or will you be working out alone?”

“Alone,” Kenma muttered quickly.

“Wrong!” Kuroo interrupted, slinging an arm around Kenma’s shoulders before he could escape. “He’ll be working out with me. You know, actual workouts, not just the bare minimum.”

“You’re acting like I won’t just cancel this membership next month.”

“Not if Kiano has anything to say about it.”

Kenma frowned, thinking about it for a second.

…Yeah. That kid was persistent.

Guess who she got it from? Ding, ding! You, of course.

If he so much as hinted at the idea of quitting, Kiano would probably just guilt-trip him with those big eyes, telling him, “Daddy, you said you’d carry me if I did well in school!” and then he’d look like the world’s weakest dad to your daughter forever.

Damn it.

He exhaled. “Fine.”

Kuroo grinned, clapping him on the back. “That’s the spirit, Daddy Kenma.”

Kenma cringed. “Never call me that again.”

Kuroo did call him that again.

-

An hour later, Kenma remembered exactly why he hated going to the gym.

He had been peer-pressured into lifting actual weights, had attempted (and failed) to use a pull-up bar, and nearly died trying to keep up with Kuroo, who, despite his stupid corporate job, was somehow still in peak physical condition.

Kenma, on the other hand, felt like he had been hit by a truck.

Kuroo, the bastard, was barely sweating. “You good?” he asked, grinning.

Kenma, lying face-down on the floor, made a vague, suffering noise.

Kuroo laughed. “Don’t tell me that’s all you’ve got. What happened to that volleyball stamina?”

“That was ten years ago,” Kenma groaned. “I’m pushing thirty in two years, idiot.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Kuroo crouched next to him, smirking. “But hey, just think about it—if you don’t get into shape soon, you’ll place Kiano down and never carry her forever!”

Kenma slowly turned his head to glare at him. “That is not comforting.”

“Kids grow up way quicker than you think, Kenma. You won’t know when you’ll ever be able to carry them, like when they were babies.”

“Is that why you’re worried that your 7-month-old son is going to get daycare soon, really? When he just start enjoying his tummy time?”

“Time goes fast.”

“Uh-huh. Right.”

Kuroo cackled, standing up and stretching. “Changing the subject,” he tuts softly. “I can’t believe this is what finally got you back in a gym. A four-year-old child has you completely wrapped around her tiny little fingers.”

Kenma didn’t even try to argue. Because, well.

It was true.

SEUMYO © 2025. PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, PLAGIARIZE, MODIFY OR TRANSLATE.

[xiaq]

Story time: Amazon can go fuck itself, and other genteel thoughts.

Good evening. I’m angry.

Up until now, I’ve purchased the majority of items I can’t thrift from Amazon because it’s easy and cost-effective, despite the moral qualms I have about the company. Previously, support was simple. If an item was damaged or a package didn’t arrive, you hopped on chat/the phone, provided proof, and they gave you a refund or return label.

But some shitstain from on high has introduced a new “incident report” process when something goes wrong. You submit your details, you wait 72 hours, and then they give you a refund. This would also be fine. If it fucking worked. But I have, at this point, irrefutable evidence that this is not actually how the process is intended to work. It’s meant to drive you so far up the wall that you either die from a stress-induced heart attack, or rage quit, and they get to keep your money.

In the last several months, I’ve had to submit three incident reports for damaged and undelivered items (I’m also encountering a lot more issues with item delivery, but that’s a different story).

ALL THREE TIMES, the process has taken weeks rather than days because ALL THREE TIMES they conveniently “had no record” of multiple incident reports I submitted despite the fact that I had confirmation emails each and every time.

Now, I’m a petty bitch, so even though the hours I was spending checking in, waiting on hold on the phone, being passed from agent to agent, was not worth the $10 and $20 refunds I was trying to get them to honor, I wasn’t going to give up. This last time, though. Oh they really tried.

So. My item isn’t delivered. I submit an incident report on the 12th and get my confirmation email of the submission on the 12th. I haven’t heard back by the 14th so I call and check. Shockingly, they have no record of my report. I submit another one, get another confirmation email. I call back the next day to check they received it. They have not. I beg them to let me forward the confirmation emails I have. I ask what else I can do different. They tell me to submit a new report and hang up on me. I submit another report. I receive another confirmation email. I call the next day. Can you guess? They have no record of it. This time, I ask for them to stay on the line with me while I submit a new report and confirm it’s been received. He confirms receipt and promises I will receive a response by the 21st. I record this conversation because I have a suspicion.

Hello. It is the 21st. Have I received a response? No. I call back. THIS ASSHOLE, who I’m pretty sure is reading this shit from a script, says, (are you ready for this) “There’s no record of an incident report, you’ll need to submit one.” I insist that I had confirmation in writing and verbally. She insists it does not exist.

So I tell her. I now have four confirmation emails. I have a recording of an Amazon support person with their credentials assuring me with the product number stated, that they’ve received my report. I also have been recording this conversation. And if she cannot assist me, I will be posting those emails and both recordings to every social media platform I have, filing a BBB complaint, and checking with my lawyer to see what options I have for legal action (do I have a lawyer? Of course not. But she doesn’t know that).

Immediately, she is backpedaling. “Oh, let me check again, maybe I missed it.” Less than 30 seconds later she’s back on the line. “I’m so sorry for the misunderstanding, I do have your report here. I will process a refund now.” Shocking. I am shocked.

IT SHOULD NOT TAKE THIS MUCH EFFORT TO GET A COMPANY TO HONOR THEIR PROMISED LEVEL OF SUPPORT.

Jesus Christ.

B and I will be finding different local places to purchase items we tend to buy via Amazon now, because I have every intention of ending our Prime membership. It looks like between Costco and Target we should be covered.

Anyway. No point to this except to rant. Thanks for reading if you got this far. I’m going to go lay under the weight of my dog and try to get my heart rate down.

[k33p-c4lm-4nd-c4rr10n]

I will never understand how so many people fell for such a wildly antisemitic rabbit hole so easily, and convinced themselves they were the underdogs? When Jewish people — especially Israelis — have lost practically everything socially ever since October seventh? Friends, partners, perceived allies, platforms, safe spaces, and for some, even family. All because antisemitism became the hot new thing. Guess all it took was for it to be flimsily rebranded as “antizionism” for nearly every leftist to eat it up like candy.

It’s funny how the ones constantly telling Zionists (or just any Jew, really) to shut up, are the very same who fill the air with incoherent yelling and incessant screams for violence and fear. For, not of. For, not against. For as long as you can rebrand it as “revolutionary”, then it’s ok, right?

“I support it,” they said. “No matter what. Because it’s just too much to ask of those poor, poor martyrs. You see, the only way to save innocents is to kill other innocents instead. And do horrible, torturous things to them til they meet their grave. Revolution at its finest. And it’s all ok, glorious, even. Because it’s being done by the good guys. Those poor, poor underdogs. You see, why would you possibly expect any semblance of moral standard from them? What do you mean I sound terrible right now? ‘Racism of low expectations’? I’ve never heard that. You’re making it up. They can’t help it. It’s their culture. it’s revolutionary. By any means necessary. How dare you say I sound like a nazi? It’s just revolution. You know, like the French, or Soviet Russia. Revolution fixes things, you’ll see. We just need more bodies. The road to peace is paved in blood. Good guys say that. I’m in the right. We are always in the right. That’s what facists say? You’re crazy. You’re insane, actually. Genocidal, even. By the way all zionists deserve to die. I don’t care if that means 80% of Jews. You know, I always had a weird feeling about them. Zionists, I mean. That’s what I meant. Dog whistle? Those aren’t real. They made them up. Who’s they? The Zionists, of course. I’m the least bigoted person you’ll ever meet.”

For those who lack reading comprehension: EVERYTHING I just put into quotations was meant to be from the mouth of the average antizionist who simultaneously exhibits extreme prejudice against Jews and extreme xenophobia against Israelis, while ALSO being extremely racist and islamophobic to the very people they claim to advocate for! It will never free Palestine to support Hamas. It will never free Palestine to dehumanize ANY side, let alone both. If this post angers you, then you know what kind of a person you are. Deep down, you know how far you’ve fallen.

[pitlanepeach]

Radio Silence | The Best Wedding Ever Group-Chat (Interlude)

Lando Norris x Amelia Brown (OFC)

Series Masterlist

Summary — Order is everything. Her habits aren’t quirks, they’re survival techniques. And only three people in the world have permission to touch her: Mom, Dad, Fernando.

Then Lando Norris happens.

One moment. One line crossed. No going back.

Warnings — Autistic!OFC, groupchat chaos, everyone being a mess.

Notes — This was so fun. Full length usual chapter coming tomorrow! MCLAREN DOMINANCE IN MIAMI YEE HAW

Want to be added to the taglist? Let me know! — Peach x

The reception was in full swing, a soft golden haze settling across the garden as the sun dipped low behind the trees. Music played gently under the hum of voices and clinking glasses. Amelia stood at the edge of the marquee, her dress slightly lifted off the grass, one hand clutching the stem of a flute she hadn’t finished. Her other hand played absently with the beading on her bodice, calm but overstimulated—buoyed by love, yes, but also exhausted by the sheer amount of day in the day.

Max found her there, where the noise thinned. He didn’t announce himself. “You survived,” he said, offering her a chilled glass of water instead of more champagne.

She took it gratefully. “Thank you.”

He nodded toward the dance floor, where Lando was trying to twirl his mum to the beat of a song that wasn’t quite slow enough. “He cried.”

Amelia sighed, but she was smiling. “Yes. He’s very dramatic.”

Max gave her an amused look. “I saw your eyes watering while you were walking the aisle.”

Amelia shrugged. “That was only because you all stood up at once. It startled me.”

Max let out a quiet laugh and bumped his shoulder lightly against hers. “You look very beautiful, zusje.”

“Thank you. Pietra said that I suit white.”

“Yeah, well, she was right.” There was a pause. Then he added, “You know, I’m still surprised we all managed to keep the bouncy castle a secret from him. I’m pretty sure everyone else knew. Everyone in the group-chat anyway.”

Amelia blinked. “The group-chat?” She made a face. “Oh! Oh, I remember him making one, I think. A few weeks ago…”

Max nodded. “It was just the drivers.” He smirked. “It was supposed to be strictly for moral support and wedding plans… It ended up being an absolute mess. You’d hate it.”

“Would I?” She asked, curiously. 

He nodded, his eyes sparkling. “Oh, definitely. Want to see?”

She held out her hand. “Obviously.”

— 

WhatsApp Group Chat — Wedding of the Year Lando Norris created this group.

Lando Norris added: Max Verstappen, Oscar Piastri, Fernando Alonso, Charles Leclerc, George Russell, Pierre Gasly, Esteban Ocon, Daniel Ricciardo, Mick Schumacher, Checo Perez, Yuki Tsunoda, Sebastian Vettel, Lewis Hamilton, Valtteri Bottas, Zhou Guanyu

PINNED MESSAGE

Lando N. Alright legends — if you’re in this group, congrats! 🎉 You’ve officially RSVP’d to the event of the year: mine and Amelia’s wedding.

This chat is now your one-stop shop for all things wedding-related like updates, travel plans, dress codes (no, Max, you can’t wear team kit) schedules, karaoke sign-up (Yuki, we’re counting on you)

Basically, treat this group like a more chaotic version of Reddit — but just for the wedding. 

Questions, hype, memes, logistics — drop them all here.

Let the countdown begin. 💍🔥

— 

Lando N. 

First wedding day rule list had been put together lads 🚫 Strong smells 🚫 Flashing lights 🚫 Unexpected loud noises (Daniel.) ✅ Soft lighting ✅ Calm vibes ✅ Understanding from you lot

If you’re unsure, ask. Don’t guess.

Charles L. Wait wait wait I can’t wear my Tom Ford Oud Wood??????

Max V. You’ll survive Charles

Pierre G. Be honest Charles you just wanted us all to know what cologne you use

Charles L. It’s my signature scent. I guess I will just smell bad. 

Oscar P. Just shower???

Daniel R. Do essential oils count Asking for a friend (the friend is me)

Lando N. NO essential oils. Nothing with any kind of lasting scent pls omfg We will smell like… humans. Deal with it. That said, please wear deodorant — don’t make me wedding a BO nightmare 

Seb V. Delighted to finally attend an event that won’t give me a Dior Sauvage headache Well done to Amelia, what a great boundary!

Yuki T. WAIT SO I CAN’T WEAR MY AXE BODY SPRAY??

George R. You still wear Axe? Actually no that makes so much sense 

Yuki T. I HAVE A SYSTEM GEORGE

Esteban O. Genuinely thank you for explaining this Had no idea scent could be overwhelming for some people Let me know if there's anything else we should avoid 🙏

Lando N. Thanks Esteban mate 🙌 We’ll probs send out some sort of a sensory guide Just follow it. It won’t be complicated

Fernando A. I will read the PDF I will understand the PDF If somebody does not understand the PDF you can ask me to explain it to you. 

Valtteri B. I’ve already made a scentless shower routine spreadsheet Dropping it here [File: Bottas_NoScent_Routine.xlsx]

Lewis H. Proud of how mature you’re being about all of this @Lando 

— 

Daniel R. So when’s the bachelor party? 👀 Or is that not something ur doing 

Lando N. wtf no Of course I’m having a bachelor party tf?????

Max V. ?????

Charles L. Wait what do you mean As in you already had one Or you’re going to have one Without us?

Oscar P. Oh my god @Lando did you, like…. Remember to invite people?

Lando N. … Wait wtf You guys didn’t get the invite?

Pierre G. LANDO.

George R. ARE YOU KIDDING. YOU HAD A WHOLE PARTY AND DIDN’T NOTICE WE WEREN’T THERE???

Lando N. NO I HAVEN’T HAD IT YET IT’S NEXT WEEK i thought it auto-sent from the app thing

Esteban O. What app thing 😐

Yuki T. WHAT KIND OF STAG PARTY APP FORGOT TO STAG THE PARTY

Valtteri B. Was it Eventbrite Because that app once invited me to a conference for funeral directors

Max V. I’m going to kill you I already bought a new outfit for it. Celeste insisted 

Daniel R. Lando you absolute FUCKING IDIOT We planned a group choreographed dance for you and you were gonna cry AND NOW YOU DON’T GET IT

Lando N. WAIT STOP EVERYONE SHUT UP I swear I thought you were all in I literally have a villa rented There’s a boat There’s custom hats You have roles assigned in a murder mystery dinner

Lewis H. Is the murder mystery dinner like 50’s themed or I need to plan my outfits accordingly

Lando N. No it’s 70’s themed obviously 

Mick S. I’m crying this is the dumbest group of men alive But i’m free next week Send the real invite pls

Fernando A. I was born ready for a murder mystery Drop the details I will prepare emotionally and theatrically

Checo P. What are the custom hats I need to know what I’m committing to 

Lando N. [Photo attachment: 17 pastel-coloured bucket hats with everyone’s name embroidered and one that says “Groom of Chaos”]

George R. Ok. Fine

Max V. They are cute. Amelia’s idea I bet 

Daniel R. Dibs on solving the murder

Lando N. Cool See you all in Spain Bring your A-game

—

Yuki T. [Photo attachment: Yuki in a shockingly bright papaya orange suit, no tie, white sneakers, grinning] LOOK I’M WEDDING PREPARED SO EARLY 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Charles L. Oh!

Max V. Wow. You look like a traffic cone.

Pierre G. Yuki… you can’t wear that

Lando N. Thats very bright

Seb V. I'm going to be honest here, Yuki... that’s a hard no for me.

Esteban O. I… don’t know how to say this… but it’s a lot Maybe we keep it a bit more neutral?

Daniel R. Is there a version of that suit in, like, a more subtle colour palette 

Yuki T. I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WOULD LOVE IT IT’S FUN AND BRIGHT AND GOOD VIBES ONLY

Oscar P. Yuki, buddy… I can see the vibes, but it’s just… not for a wedding Maybe one piece of orange? The tie maybe?

Mick S. Man… It’s just a lot of colour. 

Valtteri B. I think it's… a very bold statement.

Fernando A. I am speechless.

George R. Lando cancel the fireworks display, Yuki’s going to be the main entertainment 

Yuki T. SO YOU ALL HATE IT NO ONE SUPPORTS ME EVER

Charles L. Look, buddy, we love you. But this is Amelia’s big day, and she’s already probs going to be like… so overstimulated. Maybe we… tone it down a bit?

Seb V. Maybe a pastel? Something calm and approachable? 

Yuki T. You guys all suck i wanted to be the unique one at the wedding

Lando N. I’m going to send you guys Amelia’s colour palette. Didn’t think you’d need it but I WAS CLEARLY VERY WRONG

— 

Lando N. Actually guys on the subject on suits Where should i get mine lol

Pierre G. Wait

Max V. I’m sorry What

George R. Lando please tell me you’re joking. PLEASE.

Lando N. No like I’ve been busy okay I just realised I don’t have one yet

Oscar P. Lando Your wedding is in seven days 

Daniel R. Bro. BRO. YOU DON’T HAVE A SUIT???

Yuki T. You’re the GROOM???? You are the MAIN CHARACTER???

Fernando A. Have you even been to a tailor? Do you even know your measurements??

Lando N. Well ig figured I’d go like Tomorrow?? Maybe the day after??

Lewis H. This is insanity I think I forgot how young you actually are until right now

Max V. Do you think suits just GROW on TREES They need fittings. And time. And WORK.

Mick S. I’m having a small heart attack on your behalf Does Amelia know this Because I think she might kill you

Lando N. no lol That’s why i’m asking you guys

Pierre G. Oh you are going to get us ALL killed This is not a drill WE ARE IN THE RED ZONE

Oscar P.: Lando mate this is bad 

George R. Imagine Amelia walking down the aisle looking perfect And then you show up in an H&M blazer from 2019

Yuki T. “Lando Norris marries in last-minute sale suit” IMAGINE THAT HEADLINE. IDIOT.

Lando N. Ok well no need to yell I just thought maybe like Asos? or smth?

Daniel R. DID YOU JUST SAY ASOS FOR YOUR WEDDING??? YOUR. WEDDING.

Seb V. I want to lie down in a field and disappear.

Max V. You better be joking You better tell us this is a prank Because I will drive to wherever you are and drag you to a tailor myself

Lando N. God okay okay I’ll fix it You guys are so dramatic

Pierre G. DRAMATIC? DRAMATIC IS FINDING OUT THE GROOM HAS NO SUIT A WEEK BEFORE THE CEREMONY

Yuki T. I’m texting Amelia I’m sorry She deserves to know the truth

Lando N. NO NO NO NO i’ll go today i swear i’ll go NOW pls do not involve her i BEG

George R. We are setting up a Suit Intervention We’re booking you a tailor. This cannot be left to you

Seb V. I’m too old for this

Daniel R. Lando.

Lando N. Okay fine I’ll go Right now After lunch

Max V. I’m watching you One wrong move and I’m telling Amelia everything

Lando N. Omg do you think Amazon sell suits

ALL. NO.

—

Lando N.: Right what do you guys wanna eat from the bbq?? Drop requests and I’ll tell the caterer lol

George R. Okay well i NEED halloumi Like NEED it Non-negotiable

Yuki T. Hot dogs but only the tiny ones they have to be small I don’t trust hot dogs longer than 4 inches

Oscar P. Can we get those garlic butter prawns? The ones that make your fingers smell for 3 days Absolute fire

Max V. I want ribs

Lando N. ok so ribs halloumi weird tiny hot dogs we’re not having fucking shrimp

Lewis H. Is there going to be a plant-based grill or am I going to be expected to gnaw on a tree branch 

Daniel R. Corn But like with cheese and chili and lime Make it dangerous

Pierre G. No corn for me I don’t trust it It’s in your teeth for 6 years

Seb V. Make sure everything’s eco-friendly Bamboo forks. Compost bins. No plastic.

Fernando A. Can we get a whole grilled fish Mediterranean-style

Mick S. Burgers? Like. Just burgers. No one’s said burgers. What is wrong with all of you

Yuki T. What if the buns are slightly toasted like not burnt but lightly crispy i want a crunch

Oscar P. I’d appreciate the the option of pineapple on things meat veg dessert anything put pineapple on it

George R. ...do we have cocktails? Because that influences my BBQ choices. If i’m sipping a mojito, I want grilled peaches.

Max V. You know what I’m going to bring my own steak I don’t trust your caterer 

Lando N. What the HELL is this list None of this matches This is a nightmare

Daniel R. I still can’t believe no one else wants corn You people are wrong

Pierre G. I hope a corn on the cob haunts you in your sleep

Lando N. This was a mistake

Yuki T. Lando make sure the ketchup is Heinz please

—

Lewis H. Hey just a quick one Is roscoe allowed to come to the wedding?

Lando N. Yes Amelia would love that

Lewis H. Cool I’ll dress him up Bowtie. Paws cleaned. Very respectful.

Yuki T. YESSSSS THIS IS SO IMPORTANT roscoe is a GUEST OF HONOUR

Oscar P. absolutely bring him 

Pierre G. Wait wait wait i’m allergic to dogs Like face explodes allergic

Lando N. Where will he sit Is he getting a meal??? I’m confused now 

Yuki T. give him a tiny chair a tiny plate a tiny wine glass with water

Max V.: Okay so I can bring the cats yes?

Lando N.: No cats. 

Pierre G. Guys????????

—

George R. Okay WHERE IS LANDO

Oscar P. What do you mean

George R. I mean where. is. the. GROOM. No one’s seen him since breakfast His phone is off His location isn’t working

Max V. Are you being fucking serious 

Yuki T. I thought he was with you Max??

Daniel R. Oh my god We lost the groom We LOST. THE. GROOM. SOMEONE CALL AMELIA NO WAIT DON’T CALL AMELIA OMG

Pierre G. He’s not at the cottage He’s not at the hotel His suit is gone WE HAVE A GHOST GROOM

Mick S. Has anyone checked the carpark Or the woods idk he might’ve gone feral out of fear

Seb V. He better not have cold feet I’ll kill him

Oscar P. Do we call the police???

Lewis H. Has anyone checked the venue

George R. What venue It doesn’t open for 2 hours??

Lewis H. Right But if you were panicking about the biggest day of your life and wanted to be alone and you were also Lando Norris, wouldn’t you go and sit at the alter way too early?

Max V. He totally would

Daniel R. Wait. Wait wait. I have a photo. From the florist. She just texted me a behind-the-scenes pic of the setup and IS THAT A MAN IN A SUIT SITTING ON THE ALTAR STEPS???

Pierre G. SEND THE PICTURE

Daniel R. *image attached* Zoom in That’s our idiot. Just. Sitting there. Staring into space

George R. LANO WE THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD

Lando N. Oh hey lol I just… got ready early So I came here Is that bad

Yuki T. LANDO

Oscar P.: Are you not bored?

Lando N. I just wanted to make sure i didn’t mess anything up And i didn’t know what to do with myself So i just. Sat.

Pierre G. He’s going to SOB the moment Amelia walks down the aisle Just warning you all now

Lando N. Shut up Gasly I am cool and composed I'm not crying aready I swear

—

Amelia stared at Max’s phone screen, horrified. “Oh.”

Max snorted. “I know. They are all terrible.”

Amelia spun around and launched in Lando’s direction. “Hey! Husband!” She yelled, and Max stared at her in astonishment. “Did you seriously wait until last week to buy your suit?”

NEXT CHAPTER

[anniflamma]

AnniFlamma, we all love your fanart and animatics of Epic: The Musical, please don't let a few shitty people demotivate when 100x those people love and adore the stuff you make, along with all other animators!

Stay safe and take care, we will always be here and I can't seem to repeat this enough but we love your art

Thank you and everyone for reaching out to me. I will be honest with you all that what happened did upset me a lot, but I am very lucky to have people to go to for support. I will even blame some of them for making me cry, my friends, I mean, because if I am upset and if someone asks me if I am okay, I just break down. 😅 But I used our little server as a ground to vent, and right now I feel much better now.

But I will still be honest that I meant what I said that my interest in making Epic fan content has reduced a lot. I still love Epic, and I still really want to do the whole Ithaca saga, but I have also realized that posting content about it has caused me to feel anxious.

An example is when I finished The Challenge animatic, I felt an extreme wave of anxiety when I was going to press the upload button. And the worst thing? My anxiety confirmed the fears. I have gotten tiktok comments saying that I am a freak for drawing Penelope nude despite it being in a non-sexual way. Apparently, I have to be constantly reminded that female bodies are icky and the world hates women. Aaaaaaand then to get hit by that TikTok video of thousands of people shitting on me, Duvetbox, Gigi, Mircy, Neal, and so many more…

If you have noticed, I have posted less, all types of content for Epic. I don’t do my headcanons anymore, I never wrote that full review of Epic, I feel less keen on drawing fanart, let alone joking about shipping here online. I remember when I made a joke about shipping Aphrodite and Athea because they were the only female characters interacting with each other (ignoring Hera), and then I took it as a critique that Epic failed the Bechdel test. After that, I got plenty of anonymous messages about how I am an evil person for shipping those two goddesses… Just say that you don’t know what the Bechdel test is and block me... 😑

I also hate how my first negative experience with the Epic fandom was pure homophobia toward my Bible animatics. Like, they used negative language toward gay people to tell me to make Epic content instead. There is this weird obsession where people expect me and other artists to only do one thing, which is Epic, and if we dare to do something else, we get punished or infantilized, like we didn’t have any say when Casper commissioned us for Stories of Styx. Don’t get me started on how fucking awful people were to Casper and Teagan….

I hate how people easily tell others things, only for them to unquestionably believe everything said about me. Like the amount of "Anni made Ody/Circe porn, uwaaaa!!" And then, the moment someone questions them and forces them to realize I never made such a thing, they double down and say that I shouldn't have made Circe nude in the original animatic "cuz female bodies are icky" or the classic "Well, I haven’t seen the porn video, but someone told me it existed, so I’m going to believe it exsits." Like, you could tell these people that the sky is green, and they would believe you.

Then there’s that whole "Anni supports rape" or "Anni felt bad for the suitors and wanted Penelope to get raped" insanity. Those quotes stems from ppl was crashing out when I made a post criticizing Epic’s way of addressing the topic of rape. In that post, I was suggesting that I would like the story better if Odysseus were actually morally ambiguous when killing the suitors. How could anyone even think Ody was in the wrong for killing the suitors because he wanted to protect Penelope? How can he be a monster after that? I don’t know, I support a husband protecting his wife from gang rapists, but I guess that was the worst thing for me to ever say, huh? Like, how dare I criticize their almighty Jorge…

It’s insane that I have an easier time handling hateful Christians compared to TikTok Epic fans. 😅

Oh well... I’ve had so many bad experiences with the TikTok Epic fandom over the past two years. And eventually, you just want to log off.

I’m thinking of stopping posting Epic content at all on TikTok as a first step. If TikTok Epic fans hate my fanart that much, then I’ll do them the favor of never seeing it from my account. I will, however, continue posting my Bible animatics there. And if I continue working on my Hold Them Down animatic and if I ever finish it… I will only be active here on Tumblr and on YouTube.

And so, at this moment, I will take a pause from Epic. It probably won’t be that long because, despite everything, I love that musical. But I also have to remind myself that, despite there being so many negative remarks toward not only me but the other artists, there is a lot of love from you actual fans. I have about 138K subscribers on YouTube. That’s 138K individuals who love my work so much that they want to see more of it. THAT IS TOTALY INSANE! And I will never forget that! And I am so thankful for all of you and your support. Thank you and I love you guys! 💕

I’m also planning on making a better-formulated post about this another day. All of this is just me ranting and want to take a short break, focusing on something else.... Maybe... Venice the musical? 😅