#at least i get to yap somewhere

[brocedethesis]

midnight thoughts but basically. even if we are going into the stereotype that 'guys don't feel as much' or 'f1 is a brutal sport, it is what it is, you need to be cut out for it or simply leave', when we take the crazy lore that is brocedes it's actually very undeniable that nico and lewis had something. this was the true definition of bromance as of those days, and of a simple, genuine friendship these days. at one point of time, for a long time too, they were proud of each other. from go-karting to respective pre-f1 races and then, straight into f1. i see the 2008 hug, the smiles as they both get to be on the podium, the happiness in their faces, and ohhh there's definitely something there. maybe not the irresistible urge to kiss or something, but a glowing ball of light. pure joy for each other.

as it slowly descended into the 2016 penultimate fight, you could also see the pain in their eyes. the title decider press meet always gets me because lewis is trying to be as detached from his words as possible, almost like a third person reciting a history as if he didn't live that himself. nico, on the other hand, is just pained as he tries to get himself past all the things he did just for a single championship. if what i read was right and he had paused contact with family, cut down on cycling, even got a lighter matte paint for his helmet bc it could gain him a fucking secondth of an edge (this is still crazy to me), its just painful. all the calculations and permutations you do to win, and at the opposite end of it all is a person who is a friend. was a friend? he didn't know by the end of it. the mind games they played, the banned moved the detailed studies. the utter betrayal of not even knowing the fact, but understanding the fact that they were going to sabotage each other just for a trophy at the end of some 20+ races where they shed blood sweat and tears for a win. at the end of the day, its a sport, and they were just humans.

of course it would break something, irreparably so. i respect nico for retiring days after his win. i respect lewis for actually becoming a better teammate, and even a friend to many.

now, years later, almost going to be a decade, both understood what brings them happiness at large. but there's always going to be that one part of the heart that bugs them, no matter how detached and away from it they are. maybe on lone days, they wonder if it was worth it all. maybe on loner days they wonder if its possible to rebuild what they lost, but it is not. so they see each other on the grid, at the opposite ends, cherishing (either privately or publicly) the way they were friends.

edit: more here and here! i cannot stop yapping about them so i've made a tag thread as well with lots of other content called #The Brocedethesis on this page lol

[mellohiizz]

so, um. that spoke uu episode, huh.

[clumsypuppy]

i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you

[invasivefungus46]

if I could write a proper sentence I'd never shut up about how well written quincy is (the way that his death/survival scene from the quest parallels the scene he talks about after the "make me hate" you talk for example?)

[pidgeonlaguz]

howdy!! it's been a minute but i'm still around. fair warning-- i have been lurking the whole time and have about. 100+ posts drafted 😵‍ you'll be seeing these shortly, i'll try my best to space them out as i get around to tagging them

[discoshhtick]

IM FEELING SO MUCH DREAD OVER THE VEILGUARD RELEASE GOD. I've seen too many bad signs, I'm so afraid it's going to suck balls. I try to remind myself of how much enjoyment I still get out of inquisition even tho there's a massive pile of things about it that I absolutely despise. Please just let it be functional at launch. Please just let there be at least something good to get out of it. Please just let me find something salvageable out of it.

[kaiserouo]

Also probably no art before wednesday and if there are its probably because im in my lab and i reached my attention span so i got into a toilet and draw on my phone for 15 minutes

Or ill just be fucked in wednesday's meeting what do i know

[clementine-side-blog]

Controversial opinion:

I'M FUCKING TIRED OF TAYLOR SWIFT FUCKING STOPPPP TAKE YOUR PRIVATE JET TO THE MOON AND LEAVE ME ALONE YOU'RE HAUNTING ME AND TORTURING ME PLEASE YOU DON'T EVEN MAKE GOOD MUSIC AND YOU TAKE YOUR PLANE TO THE FUCKING GROCERY STORE AND YOU SUED A TEENAGER FOR POSTING PUBLIC INFO ABOUT YOU OMG STOPPPPP LEAVE OR BECOME A BETTER PERSON FFS!!!! ALSO STILL CAN'T GET OVER THE FACT THAT SHE USED THE GRAMMYS AS A WAY TO ANNOUNCE HER NEW ALBUM?!?! LIKE THAT'S NOT YOUR PERSONAL BILLBOARD SWEETIE, IT'S AN AWARD CEREMONY FOR ARTISTS! IT'S NOT ALWAYS ABOUT YOU!!! HOW FUCKING SELF CENTERED, SELFISH, AND ABSOLUTELY EMBARRASSING?!?! 😭😭

(If any swifties attack me I will tell your mothers and report you to the FBI)

[cherribombz]

do I have multiple au! fanfic ideas sitting in the vault, waiting for the day I finally sit down and put pen on paper? yes.

am I going to instead sit here and brain dump an entire isekai novel plot bc it's been eating me alive from the inside out for days, despite knowing it's really never going to see the light of day? you bet your britches.

[thegrayace]

I'm so annoyed. I've been looking forward to this work sponsored "valentine's" get together at Cane's for like two weeks. Of course I foolishly assumed that work would buy my 15 dollar chicken 🙄 but no. We have to pay for ourselves.

And now I have two coworkers offering to buy my lunch and I appreciate it and I'm truly grateful for them. But l hate it and I'm angry.

[rex3o]

Doting wife

Royal au! Sukuna x Reader

Being the emperors wife was something that you would have not expected to be in the position of. Many would think being the emperors wife, would bring in love, happiness and luxury. Yet your husband would be nothing of the sorts, yes you heard of his reputation. A cold and ruthless emperor with a thriving empire, you entered his palace with big hopes and determination of changing him to be a loving husband.

oh how wrong you was.

After 4 years of marriage and a heir to his throne, he was as cold and ruthless the day you met him. Every interaction was short or met with silence. You put effort in your duties as his wife and empress to the empire to impress him. Yet nothing. You wore his favourite colour. Nothing. You did your make up differently. Nothing. You tried talking to him about things he was interested... and nothing. He was not phased. During the birth of your son, he was nowhere to be seen only to come in the following morning and smile at the sight of his son. yet when his red eyes met yours his smile dropped.

So here you sat in the royal gardens watching your three year old son chase a butterfly with his toy sword. Letting your mind wander, you had tried everything.. what was you not doing that he hasn't even dropped a single thought on you. Your lady in waiting looked at you a bit confused as you continued to stare hardly at nothing.

"Your majesty" she says softly yet anxiously, as she looks at you while drifting her eyes to whatever thing you was staring at.

"hmm" you say.

"are you uh.. quite alright you seem to be staring at.." as she is lost for words.

You snap out of your thoughts and look at her, your eyes widening a little.

"oh apologises, I seemed to have lost myself in thought."

She exhales as she smiles at you.

"oh that is fine.. may I ask about what?"

"oh nothing.. you know.. thoughts." you say not really wanting to indulge on the countless attempts of getting your husband to even give a glance at you.

Your eyes land back on your son as you find him aggressively hitting the dead bug on the ground. Definitely his father's son. You thought. You got up from your seat as you approached your son to stop his insane antics and bring him back inside. The boy huffs and drops his toy sword and runs back inside as you followed after him, walking back inside the palace you spot Sukuna walking with several of his advisors, as they head somewhere. You do not let your eyes linger for long as you follow after where your son had ran off.

After several hours of chasing your son around the palace, you managed to catch him and get him ready for dinner. As you both head inside the dining hall, he runs and takes his space next to his father. Sukuna sat on his seat already busying himself with the food. You sit down and remain silent. How odd. You're never quiet at dinner. You ate your food only glancing at your son to see if he is eating like a proper boy and not gobbling his food like a damn animal.

Dinner goes swiftly, without a word as Sukuna finishes, you take your leave. He gives a quick glance at your figure.

The days went on, this new personality of yours. Quiet, not chatty as before. The little interactions of yours, well one sided conversations, with Sukuna went from infrequent to zero. He noticed this. As you slowly put your effort and interest into other things besides him. Sukuna would find himself at least hoping for a glance of you around the palace. Hell he would be even be satisfied by you uttering a single word at the dinner table. But no.

There you three was again at the table, silence except for your son's occasional ramble of what he did today to his father.

Sukuna bore his eyes onto you, as his son's yapping went from one ear to another. Gripping onto his utensils as he waits for your eyes to meet his, for you to utter something. Yet you sat on the opposite end eating your food finding the chandelier to be the most interesting thing you came across the whole day.

"Have we lost our manners suddenly." he blurts out annoyed.

You stop chewing as you slowly look at your husband, as if he grew a pair of wings and started to fly.

"pardon..." was the only thing you could conjure up.

"I am your husband, you are supposed to greet me, ask me how my day is.. have you forgotten your role wife?" he demands. Yet your clueless face irked him more.

".. uh- how was your day?" you ask, not knowing if you should or not. Sukuna grunts in response.

"that's more like it." Is all he says, as you remain confused for the remainder of the dinner.

Your interaction with Sukuna stuck out like sore thumb to you for the next couple of days. You did not know what to make of it. You stood silent, as the advisor chattered along on what to do for the next royal event. The advisor realising that your mind was on something else he quietened down waiting for you to speak. As you came back to reality, you looked at him confused.

"w-we can do this on another day empress if your feeling under the weather." he says anxiously. You just barked out a laugh.

"I am good, something had caught my attention, please continue." You say, as he goes continues. The door to the private meeting room swings open as Sukuna enters and makes his way next to you. The advisor taken aback looks at you if he should continue.

"Continue" Sukuna commands as the man starts his nervous ramble now more directed to Sukuna for the royal event. The meeting ends, the advisor leaves defeated as he didn't get much answers from the both of you.

This new behaviour of his continued, every day at least at one point of your day, he makes himself known and sit with you till he seems fit. He doesn't say anything some days but others he would demand you to say something, whatever it was you was doing on that day he will involve himself. Even if it was watching your son fight an imaginary dragon. But you did not back down. Yes this was entertaining watching your husband finally put some sort of an effort. So you kept this behaviour of yours up. Almost like a silent contest on who is going to break first.

As the day of the royal event dawned, you spoke to your guests, in your beautiful gown. Your presence captured everyone's attention.. even your husband. As a duke kindly asked for your hand for a dance. You took his request, as you both waltzed on the ballroom floor. As he lets you go for you to spin, you are met back with a familiar set of arms. Your eyes met your husbands crimson eyes.

You hold back your smile, as he lead you to dance. Everyone's lingering eyes drifted away, the music blending away in the back of your mind, as you both danced.

"You did not wear red.." Sukuna comments. You look back up at him.

"I have worn red too many times." You retort.

"Too many times.. even for your husband?"

All you did was shrug your shoulders, as his hand your waist tightens.

"You used to gab my ears off woman.. now your as silent as a mouse." He comments.

"And..?"

"Has my efforts not been enough.." He quietly says in your ear.

"You think, a couple weeks of you spending some time with me, making me question you is effort" you say back in disbelief.

"It is something woman" he says slightly annoyed.

You look at him, as your smile slowly fades.

"I spent the last four years, catering to your needs, acting as a good wife to you.. yet the moment I stop you suddenly remember you have a wife and start acting like somewhat of a companion-"

"companion" he says offended. "I have treated you like a husband should, I spent time with you, I spoke to you, I provided you with a palace and riches."

"oh thank you for doing the bare minimum." as you push yourself away from him and composing yourself as you walked away from the ballroom floor. Sukuna stands there as he walks off the opposite direction not wanting to make a scene in front of his guests clearly annoyed.

While the event progresses, as all he could think about was you, what you said. He watched your every move, every word you uttered to your guests, every sip you took from your glass, every hand movement. He took note of it. He did not care if people realised he was staring you down. He couldn't wrap his head around how you could even think of speaking to him like that.

Was what he did not enough? Before you would swoon if he even said a word to you. Now you did not care. You would chatter his ear off about things you assumed he would be interested in. Now silence. All your efforts now gone.

What was he not doing to get you back to being his doting little wife.

part 2

-

big FAT authors note : I cannot lie guys I am not fit for long fics but yk what I can do... make one shots so please enjoy what my mind could conjure up for 15 minutes after having 3 cups of chai. Also I may have a thing for historical au I dunno. my head is NOT working. so pls if there is any mistakes do LMK!

- R

[vaquerolvr]

Road trip! Reader is Passenger Princess (due to them giving their man a heart attack everytime they drive 😊)

i am Still Suffering on my road trip. god save me. i wrote this in my notes app while stuck in traffic for three hours. the formatting and spelling are in the hands of Our Merciful Lord (tumblr)

price

refuses to let anyone else drive unless he’s on the verge of passing out

(probably the only one you can trust to drive tbh)

does the dad thing where he’ll stick out his hand to get some of your snacks

hates stopping for any reason, wants to get to the destination as quickly as possible

when he does get forced to take a break, he’s very upset about it

backseat driver, stresses everyone out

(gaz is tempted to tape his mouth shut)

claims he “isn’t tired” and “can keep going” but is the first one to pass out when you stop at a hotel

gaz

passenger princess

if you try to get him to drive he’ll pretend to be sleepy

in charge of the music

(not because everyone likes his music but because he fought soap for the right)

hogs the phone charger

calls shotgun and will fistfight anyone he tries to take it from him

(he’ll let you have it if you want but he’ll be pouty about it)

ghost

another passenger princess (because no one trusts his driving)

the single time he’s allowed to drive, he nearly causes an accident ten minutes in

weakest bladder known to man

forces you to stop every hour

passes out after the first hour of driving

soap wakes him up when his snoring gets too loud and it causes another bout of smacking each other

takes photos of anything cool he spots on the road

(they all come out blurry but it’s the thought that counts)

soap

the only other one that price trusts to drive

decent driver, just has road rage at times

begs gaz to let him change the music (gaz always says no)

points out the scenery constantly

“look, there’s cows!”

collects souvenirs from every gas station you stop at

plays road trip games (i spy, slug bug/punch buggy/whatever you call it)

he and ghost get in trouble when it devolves into them just hitting each other

has a stash of snacks and drinks that he’ll share if you ask nicely

is awake and yapping the entire drive

(gaz actually does tape his mouth shut)

alejandro

the exact opposite of price

likes to take his time and relax

will somehow turn a 10 hour drive into 15 hours

wants to stop at every roadside attraction he sees

you have to keep reminding him that you have somewhere to be or he’ll get lost on a side quest

souvenir guy, buys magnets and keychains

has cds that he likes to listen to

very chill but you might get stressed if you’re on a deadline

is insistent on being the driver but gets traumatized when he runs over a squirrel

“ale, it wasn’t your fault. it was dark, you couldn’t see-“

“I’M A MURDERER”

rudy

probably the best person to plan a road trip with

isn’t a maniac like price but isn’t as laidback as alejandro

likes to listen to random radio stations as he drives

is really bad about speeding

regularly goes at least 15-20 over the speed limit but is lucky enough to never get pulled over

uses road trips as an excuse to only eat junk food then regrets it when his stomach starts hurting

needs a day or two to recover afterwards because his back hurts from sitting for so long

graves

scarily organized

has an itinerary and follows it to the letter

wouldn’t let you drive even if you begged

if he gets tired he’ll just get one of the shadows to take over

honestly, most of the trip consists of the shadows entertaining you with their antics while graves drives

one of them gets left behind at a gas station and you have to drive back half an hour to pick him up. graves is pissed

makarov

do NOT try to take this man on a road trip

if you mention it, he’ll have plane tickets booked before you can even blink

cannot handle long drives, the most he can manage is an hour before he starts getting annoyed

keegan

the most stressful but also the most entertaining

demands control of the music but plays the weirdest shit

not the best driver but not the worst

he won’t crash at least and he’ll only get pulled over a few times

says the most out of pocket shit to get a reaction from you

“how long do you think i can drive with my eyes closed?”

“KEEGAN NO-“

keegan has been banished to the passenger’s seat.

nikolai

another guy who is good at road trips

great driver, you can sleep the whole ride and he won’t gaf

it’s kind of terrifying. you’ll wake up from another nap to find him staring dead-eyed at the road as he drives

secretly shoplifts something from every place you stop at

doesn’t admit it until you accidentally find his stash hidden in one of the bags

“solnishko, you must understand. i need it.”

“you do not need a keychain of a frog with a cowboy hat, nik!”

nikolai is now wanted for theft in every US state (and several countries)

[celestie0]

gojo satoru x reader | fake marriage au [18+]

in holy matriphony drabble 1. two truths & a lie

ᰔ pairing. fake marriage au - neighbor&realtor!gojo x nurse!reader (ft. choso x reader & suguru x reader)

ᰔ drabble summary. the power goes out at gojo's house due to a storm, and he comes up with a way to pass the time in the dark. (note: for new readers, this drabble is for my long fic gojo x reader series “in holy matriphony”!! you can find the masterlist here)

ᰔ genre/tags. a little fluffy, a little sad, and a lil revealing.

ᰔ chapter. drabble #1

ᰔ words. 2.6k

a/n. hi my ihm lovelies!! welcome to this silly little drabble i wrote, i tried to keep it under 1k words i swear lol but alas i yap. much love to the anon who suggested a prompt where the power goes out at gojo’s house, i did change the prompt a little bit but i loooove this premise!! it's one of my favesss. i could picture this drabble taking place sometime when reader n gojo are pretty early on into their fake marriage arrangement and are kind of getting situated w one another! perhaps before chapter 4 or something :) hope you enjoyy. these drabbles are just for the vibes btw

nav. masterlist :: playlist

“Oh for fucks sake, please don’t tell me I didn’t charge these things,” you hear Gojo say in the pitch black darkness, along with the sound of his palm smacking against the metal of his fancy LED flashlights that he was so excited to bring out in the moment of truth against the power outtage of the storm that was pitter-pattering just outside the windows.

You’ve got your arms crossed, a frown on your face but it doesn’t matter because he can’t see it anyways, and wait impatiently for him to provide some sort of lighting inside the living room that wasn’t the dim opal of the distant streetlights blurred by the rain.

“I’m so happy I’ve found out sooner rather than later that I should not choose you as my zombie apocalypse partner,” you comment just to bruise his ego.

“What zombie apocalypse?” he asks while he shakes his flashlights as if that would magically make them work, entirely distracted by the action to the point where he sounds like he genuinely believes there’s some zombie apocalypse he wasn’t made aware of.

You roll your eyes to display your annoyance. But again, doesn’t matter, since he’s not privy to it in the dark. 

There’s a bright flash of lightning, illuminating the house briefly, where you see a snapshot of Gojo standing in front of you in his long sleeve and plaid cotton pants, the image of a man who was just seconds away from getting some shuteye before he heard you scream from the bathroom because the lights went out while you were showering. And then there’s the growl of low thunder somewhere in the distance.

You’re shivering as your still-damp hair brushes against the nape of your neck. It had barely been a week since you formally started living with Gojo in this little fake marriage arrangement, and to say it was an adjustment of different personalities was an understatement. With a heavy sigh, you take a blind step forward towards what you believe is the direction of the kitchen.

“Let’s just grab some candles—”

Unfortunately for you, the hem of your floor-length gown gets caught on the corner of the loveseat, and you’re tripping over your own feet with a small gasp leaving your lips, bracing for the impact of the floor but you feel a strong arm wrap around your waist, keeping you from—…ah, it appears you were actually about to plop headfirst onto the glass of the coffee table.

“Oh shit—” Gojo huffs, and you feel the warmth of his chest against your back as he pulls you towards him to stabilize you, and the contact makes your breath hitch. 

“S-Satoru, let go of me,” you say, scrambling in his hold like an anxiously avoidant cat.

He lets go of you, and you stand up straight and turn to face him, at least you think you’re facing him, and say with genuine curiosity, “how did you know what my exact physical coordinates were so you could grab me before I split my skull open??”

There’s a second of a pause like he’s questioning his own reflexes too. “I don’t know…I just… knew?”

You blink at him wide-eyed, and then jump a little from the loud crack of thunder that rattles the windows.

With the minimal lighting provided by Gojo’s phone screen, a commodity you both seek to preserve because he’s on 2% and your phone has long since died since it was already only on 7% before you had even hopped in the shower, you both make it to the kitchen and Gojo fishes out some wick candles in the back of his cupboards, some really waxy bright pink ones that Juno apparently made in school and then gifted to him.

“Alright, here,” he says, handing you a lighted candle placed in a candle holder, and you carefully wrap your index finger around the handle. “And can you just stay still real quick for me?”

“Huh?” you blink at him.

He lifts his phone up and snaps a photo of you with flash, then looks down at the screen with a self-satisfied grin on his face. “Sweet.” And then his smile drops. “Oh shit. Phone’s dead.”

“Satoru.” You pinch the bridge of your nose. “You did not just use up the battery of our last source of communication to the outside world just to take a picture.”

“But you just look so much like Ebeneezer Scrooge right now, it’s so uncanny—”

You gasp, glancing down at your attire, and then at the candle in your hand. “Give me that—” You grit through your teeth to try and grab his phone from him to delete the picture, even though you know you can’t, both because his phone’s dead but also he’s easily tall enough to hold it well out of your reach as you just hear him laugh to himself while you’re cursing out his whole ancestry in your head.

The night ticks on as you two light a few more candles to illuminate the downstairs area at least. The storm outside the windows only seems to pick up in severity, with whistling winds harassing the glass of the windows, along with the harsh downpour of rain that almost seems neverending.

“You know, we can cuddle if you’re scared,” Gojo teases as he brushes past you to grab another candle.

You roll your eyes at him, and this time he can see it. “I’m not scared of a stupid little storm, Sato—”

A loud boom of thunder reverberates before you can finish your sentence, rattling the windows and the walls, and you yelp as you jump in your skin.

You stiffly glance up at Gojo and see him with a quirked brow and a grin on his face, and you let out a puff of air in annoyance.

He walks towards you. “Just know that the offer always stands.” And then he’s shuffling his feet towards the coffee table in the living room. You watch him as he sits down criss-cross on the floor in front of it, setting down his lukewarm cup of coffee before he takes a sip from it and glances towards the window.

You sigh and make your way over there too, and sit down neatly across from him, smoothing over the fabric of your nightgown with an anxious feeling in your bones.

“So,” he says, his face warmly illuminated in shadows by the minimal candle light, “how should we pass the time?”

“I’d prefer any option that involves not having to talk to you.”

He places his palms on the floor and slides them behind him before leaning back onto them. “Charades then?”

“Oh my god, you really never get the hint, do you?”

“What hint?”

“I. Don’t. Like. You.”

“Oh come on. You don’t even know me.”

Your eyes blink wide at that. “What do you mean?”

“The reason you don’t like me is because you’ve never made an effort to get to know me, y/n.”

“I find it awfully pretentious of you to assume that I would like you just on the basis of getting ‘to know’ you better.”

He tilts his head at that. “Yeah? Isn’t that how things usually work? You know, you find out the person sitting across from you is also just as human as you are because you find out that their favorite color is mustard and that they broke a bone or two in middle school.”

“Please don’t tell me that your favorite color is mustard.”

“No, it’s green. But I did fracture my distal radius in the eight grade.” His brow furrows slightly, as if some thought passes his mind, and then he sits up straight. “I’ve got it, let’s play two truths and a lie.” He says it like he’s just discovered the solution to a problem that you didn’t even know existed.

“I haven’t played that since I was in high school.”

“Me neither," he says, “that’s what makes it fun. So much more material to cover now.”

Your lip tips upward in a small pout, and your shoulders sulk. You’re not really sure if you have that much material to cover. The past six or so years, you’ve just been spending taking care of your mom. You imagine for someone who lives a life as normal as Gojo’s, he must’ve spent the past six years collecting life experiences, or crossing things off of bucket lists. Stuff that makes for interesting conversation. You usually run a blank on stuff like that when anyone asks you, so what have you been up to since the last time I saw you?

“I’ll go first,” he offers, “alright.” He holds his thumb out of his fist, “I’ve never had braces,” he holds his index finger out, “never had a cavity,” he holds his middle finger out, “and my dentist got arrested for extortion a couple months ago.”

You blink at him. “…why are they all related to dentistry?”

“Huh?” He furrows his brow at you. “Aren’t they supposed to have a theme or something?”

“Whaaaatt?? That’s how you played growing up?”

“Yeah.”

Your interest is piqued, and you lean forward. “That’s interesting.” 

You squint your eyes at him. His teeth are too perfect to have not had braces…but also, no cavities? With the amount of sugar he eats? Bullshit…somehow his dentist getting arrested was the least surprising thing.

“I’m gonna say,” you start, “that you’ve had braces.”

He shakes his head. “Vandalism. He got arrested for vandalism.”

“No cavities?! How?!”

He shrugs. “I dunno. Just never had one.”

You sigh, and perch your elbow on the table before dropping your chin onto your palm as you look at him. 

“Alright, your turn,” he says, grabbing the handle of his coffee mug to take a sip, throughout which he doesn’t break eye contact with you.

You worry your bottom lip between your teeth briefly. “Um. I’ve…never been skydiving. Keanu Reeves follows me on Twitter. And…” You think to yourself. “I’ve thought about murdering you many times.”

He pokes his tongue to the inside of his cheek. “I’m gonna hope it’s that last one.”

“I would never experience another sad emotion in my life if Keanu Reeves actually followed me on anything, so.”

“You’ve thought about murdering me?? y/n.” He deadpans your name, as if to scold.

You shrug. “You annoy me sometimes.”

“Have I always annoyed you?”

“It’s your turn, Satoru.”

He frowns, and lets out a deep exhale as he scratches the back of his neck as if he’s struggling to let the topic go, but then he sighs. “Uh.” His voice sounds deeper with a bit more of a drag. “I, uh, I once owned a pet tarantula…I’ve never gotten a speeding ticket, and…I’ve never broken a bone.”

“It’s that last one.”

“Yeah. Damn, pretty good.”

“Satoru, you literally just told me you broke your distal radius in eighth grade.”

“Did I? Oh.”

You narrow your gaze at him, and study his distant expression. He seems awfully distracted, ever since you confessed that you find him pretty annoying. And there’s a part of you that feels a little bad about it.

“Okay, my turn,” you say, and you breathe in deep, “I…was voted prom queen twice in high school. I once won a county-wide speed-reading contest. And—” You lick your lips briefly. “And you haven’t always annoyed me.”

“Okay. This time, I really hope it’s not that last one.”

You nod, a small smile on your face. “It wasn’t county-wide. It was state-wide.”

He grins, leaning forward. “That’s really cool.”

You toss your hair over your shoulder. “What can I say. One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish never stood a chance.”

He’s looking at you intently now, whereas you would’ve otherwise expected some sort of laugh from him at your faux cockiness, instead he just looks like he’s deep in thought once again. And then he’s leaning back into a neutral spine, that tongue poking to the inside of his cheek again boyishly. Cute, you think to yourself. You both were grown adults, but it felt like you were at a high school camping retreat and managed to sneak away some alone time with that boy in your grade that teases you at the top of every homeroom who you swear you despise but secretly giggle about when you’re scribbling in your diary during lunch period.

“Your turn,” you say, somewhat impatiently, because you find yourself wanting to know more. 

“Okay,” he says, “my favorite color’s mustard, I’ve got blue eyes, and you remember around the time we first met and I asked you if you wanted to come with me to that wine tasting event my brokerage firm was hosting?”

You blink at him, and slowly nod.

“Well, that was supposed to be a date,” he says, “I was asking you out.”

Your eyes grow wide, mouth slightly agape as you stare at him. 

“But, uh, I guess I should’ve been more direct, considering you brought three of our other neighbors with you.” He leans backwards onto his palms again. “I mean, of course, it was also before I knew you had a boyfriend.” He swipes the back of his hand underneath his chin. “And before I realized I probably shouldn’t be asking my neighbor out on a date in my first week of moving to a completely different state.” His shoulders drop slightly, and the flicker of the flame in between the two of you reflects off of his eyes. “But, I don’t know. I just remember thinking how interesting you were. And fun to talk to. I couldn’t help myself.” 

You feel your cheeks warm, and your heart is beating fast. So fast. Not attributed to the rain or the storm, but to the confession. And perhaps some of it was melancholy, this odd feeling that wafts through you, that wonders, how different would things be if you weren’t still with Choso when Gojo moved in next door. Or how different things would be if you were a little better at reading social cues, or not abusing the rules of a plus one to a social event. Or how different things would be if you were the happier version of yourself, a version that went extinct exactly five years ago when a small mass was found in your mother’s lungs.

You swallow hard. “You’re right,” you say, “you should’ve been more direct.” 

“You were seeing someone, y/n.” It was sound reasoning, sure. The fact that even if he had been more direct, it wouldn’t change the fact that you would’ve had to politely decline.

But your gaze shifts down towards the surface of the coffee table, to the melting candle of hot pink wax, and you repeat yourself—

“You should’ve been more direct.”

The whirring of the fridge comes to life first, then the beep of the microwave, before the entire house illuminates with light so suddenly it almost makes you jump from the shift in ambience. You look at a now fully-lit Gojo, who’s staring at you with questioning eyes, like he’s still left in the trance of the darkness from a few moments ago rather than accepting the fact that there is now light. And you clear your throat as you stand up onto your feet.

“Lovely.” You clap your hands together. “I can go back to…whatever the hell I was doing before the power went out,” you say. And whatever person you were before the power went out, too.

You shuffle your feet towards the stairs, but then Gojo says, “wait.”

“Hm?”

“So…just for my peace of mind…you don’t still think about murdering me, right?” he says.

You blink at him. “Mm. We’re done playing here, Satoru. We’ll have to save it for the next time the power goes out.”

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

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[end of drabble 1. ‘two truths & a lie’]

a/n. tysm for reading! and once again ty to the anon who suggested this prompt!! :'') and tysm to everyone who sent drabble prompts in they're so cute and i can't wait to write them!! i did mention this briefly but i will save some of them for later when ihm couple are officially together since i think the prompts will be super cuuuter that way lol i feel like i'm writing w my hands tied behind my back for drabbles because ihm couple aren't officially together yettt 🤣..... and i have no one to blame for that except myself 😞😞 anywho, i plan to release some more drabbles this week for ihm. i know i said i'd take a break from writing but i was just itching to write something, but i also didn't want to dive into s2 for ihm just yet because i def need a lil break from the main storyline, so i thought i'd do some drabbles. these are pretty low stakes n easy to write n i have a lot of fun w them. i remember i enjoyed writing the kickoff drabbles so i wanted to write some for ihm now that s1 is over :) i wasn't sure if my main ihm taglist wanted to be tagged in drabbles too but if you'd like to be tagged in drabbles as well feel free to comment under this post :') i'll tag you for the next ones! sm lovee <3

☾·̩͙꙳ masterlist :: playlist :: ao3 link

[lavottino]

Self-indulgent but mandatory "What if the strawhats were Italian" because it has been plaguing my mind for months.

I'm putting some context (and also some headcanons) for each drawing under the cut for anyone interested in better understanding what is going on, so expect a lot of yapping 😭

I think I will draw more Italian strawhats shenanigans in the future (I'm sorry for sidelining you like that Jinbe...), we'll see...

1. Italy is divided into 20 regions, and I associated the 10 strawhats to 10 of those regions. The regions I chose have been mainly picked on instinct based on whatever felt right to me, so I wouldn't look too hard into it 😭

2. Tortellini are a type of stuffed pasta specifically from the Emilia-Romagna region (where I see Robin coming from) and even more specifically from the Bologna and Modena provinces; while fiorentina is typically from Florence (Tuscany) and Luffy would eat at least 10 of them a day if he could

3. Alberto Angela is a paleontologist and history and science communicator, and he runs some TV programs that mainly focus on history and science. He's well-spoken, he's educated, developing a little crush for him is basically a canon event, he's the IT Italian man if you ask me. Robin is watching Ulisse - Il piacere della scoperta, which is also the TV program that introduced me to him when I was like 9 😌

4. Table football is quite common in Italy (all my life I've called it biliardino, but apparently its name is calciobalilla? whatever 😭). I don't really have a lot to say about this one, actually. I just think that a Zoro and Sanji team up would be unmatched (just like in animanga). Like 10-1 (AT BEST) kind of unmatched. If they receive a goal (which was definitely a fluke) they're going to mercilessly trash talk each other into scoring the most diabolically aggressive goal ever witnessed in the history of mankind (Chopper is scared of them) (Luffy thinks it's kinda funny) (Nami decided they won't play at the same time until they learn to chill out).

5. Paolo Fox is a famous astrologer in Italy and basically there used to be this Sunday TV program (Mezzogiorno in famiglia, they discontinued it some years ago but it's the show that Nami and Zoro are watching), where he was called in every week as a guest to rank the signs from 12th to 1st based on the luck, love, money etc. they were going to get during the following week. And whether you believed in astrology or not, you were still going to eat that shit up regardless because you just wanted to know where your sign was going to be placed.

6. Easter eggs in Italy are this big chocolate egg that contains a "surprise", which can be toys or various trinkets (bracelets, keychains, that kind of stuff). When Easter is coming, the supermarkets have full aisles of Easter eggs because there are multiple brands and multiple themes (for example, the ones specifically targeted towards children could be One Piece/Pokemon/Winx etc. themed, containing a surprise that is related to them). I like to think that Chopper would be so excited about the chocolate that he would eat it all without even looking at the surprise 😭 (it's lying somewhere on the ground, a forgotten soldier amidst the raging battle)

7. Neapolitan songs can go pretty hard when you don't have someone in your ear telling you how corny and cringe they are. Franky has a whole arsenal. If during a conversation he hears a word that reminds him of one of his songs, he will start singing it. Brook joins him whenever he hears him, and if he doesn't know the actual words to the song, he will still string together some notes with his guitar. Luffy and Usopp will join at a certain point, while the other strawhats enjoy the little show. If Franky is singing and Robin appears in his line of sight, he will switch to a romantic song and start serenading her. When this happens, Sanji joins too (not because he's trying to woo Robin, but because he will never miss a chance to serenade a woman 😌).

8. I just know Brook has en entire repertoire of love songs that he sings whenever Zoro and Sanji are fighting. In this case he is singing "Bello e impossibile" by Gianna Nannini, whose chorus goes something like "handsome, handsome and impossibile, with black eyes and your Middle Eastern taste" and then again "handsome, handsome and invincible, with black eyes and a kissable mouth/a mouth to be kissed" (it sounds more poetic in Italian I'm sorry 😭). They get mad and flustered every time. It doesn't matter if they are still dancing around each other or are already together. Brook has the time of his life.

[pieandflannel]

₊˚⊹♡ body swap pt.2

part one | part three

pairing: dean winchester x fem!reader

summary: what’s the first thing you do when you wake up in dean’s body? the clear obvious

cw: 18+ smut.ᐟ slightly comical.ᐟ pwp.ᐟ exploration of the male body.ᐟ male masterbation.ᐟ you match dean’s perviness [jk you’re worse].ᐟ you jerk it while in his body.ᐟ cum tasting.ᐟ you catch dean playing with himself in your body.ᐟ

word count: 1295

julia yaps: i tried my best but i don’t have a pp so i’m sorry if this is bad, you guys were begging for part two so here it is.

────────── 👥 ──────────

you get woken up by a weird feeling while sleeping on your stomach, as if you were laying on something long and stiff. you let out a little groan as you lift your head up to check the time, seven thirty in the morning was way too early for you to be awake so you rolled your eyes. “what the hell” you murmured before reaching under yourself to check what it was that was poking you.

at first you thought you must have fallen asleep on your sex toy but as you tried pulling it out from underneath you, you were rudely awakened by pain. “ouu fuck what the hell” you hissed before sitting up and rubbing your eyes.

your eyes widened as you notice you weren’t in your bed, and that you were looking down at a bulge in not your hot dog pjs. at first you were so confused, wondering why on earth would you be dreaming about something like that, but as your brain started waking up and catching up with reality, it all hit you. the god damn witch. what a fucking bitch. you must have swapped bodies with dean after yesterdays failed hunt.

you couldn’t help your curiosity, you gently poked at the bulge before hooking your fingers under the waistband and slowly peaking inside, honestly the gasp you let out could’ve woken china up.

“oh. my. god..” you gasped, your lips parted and eyes widened. there was a dick, a big dick attached to your body. well, dean’s body. well actually.. he is the owner of this dick so like- okay okay focus. there is a big hard cock in your pj pants.

but lord did it look mouth watering, no wonder dean was popular with the ladies, i mean come on, not too big but definitely not small, girthy and with the perfect amount of veins, the tip blushing pink with pearly precum leaking out, it was practically begging to be touched.

you carefully looked around the room, god were you crazy to want to try and touch it? you let out a sigh as you laid back down on the bed. this was wrong wasn’t it? dean is your friend and he wouldn’t want you to be touchi- okay that’s probably a lie, but the point still stands. it was wrong. like hello, privacy.. right?

that’s why it felt even more tempting to try. but come on you won’t be walking around with a hard on for hours, before you and dean figure out a reverse spell for this it’ll take a day if not more, plus you’ve heard somewhere before that guys just jerk off to get rid of it and that’s all. no big deal right? you’re helping yourself help dean, at least that’s what you kept telling yourself.

you put the palm of your hand on the bulge through the clothing, gently palming yourself. it felt.. nice, but also weird. obviously much different from a coochie.

the little devil on your shoulder tempting you to slide down the pjs and just play with it, you bit your lip thinking it through, dean will probably play with your boobs when he wakes up so.. ehh fuck it, he doesn’t need to know.

you hooked your fingers onto the waistband again and slowly pulled the pjs down till the knees, the girthy cock springing free, you couldn’t help but bite your lip at the delicious view between your legs. you couldn’t lie, dean’s cock was gorgeous.

without wasting much more time, you wrapped your hand around the cock, thumb spreading the precum all over the tip like it was lube.

which reminded you, you probably need lube. you reached into dean’s night stand drawer, searching for any bottle of lube, because let’s be real here he definitely has a lot.

“aha!” you let out as you managed to find a nearly empty bottle. this man’s been busy huh? can’t blame him honestly.

you squirted some of it on your hand and went back to business. you circled your thumb over the tip, fuck that felt so good. so so good, but you were impatient, so it didn’t take you long before starting to slide your hand up and down the shaft, slowly. dean’s hand looked so pretty as it was wrapped around his cock.

you tried feeling out every inch and detail, you eyes roaming around and exploring the lower body, the small pudge of a belly dean has was honestly a turn on, the vein that decorated his left hip looked so kissable. “fuck..” you whimpered as you sped up, gently squeezing your hand around the tip.

your breath growing heavier as you jerked yourself off, i wonder if he’d let me do it once we are back in our bodies, you thought to yourself.

the pace of your hand quickening without much thought, it felt too fucking good, your mind was going foggy from the pleasure that invaded every nerve in your body. you felt pressure building in the lower abdomen region.

you let out another whimper, your chest rising and falling as you were so close to the edge. “fuck i’m about to cum..” you moaned out before strings of white started shooting all over your hand and abdomen.

you kept on pumping your hand, trying to ride out the climax to the fullest. your breath heavy as your body tensed up before relaxing. you let your head fall back on the pillow for a second before looking down at the mess you’ve left. the head of the cock throbbing.

all this pearly white droplets, it would be such a waste to just clean it all up with a tissue, you thought to yourself. you let go of the slowly softening cock and lifted your hand up to your mouth, contemplating for a second if it would be weird trying the cum on your hand.

you shrug it off though and don’t think much of it, sticking your tongue out and licking the semen off your hand. it tasted quite salty, but then again that’s a bit obvious considering what dean’s diet consists of.

after you got your breath back you cleaned yourself up with the tissues from the nightstand and pulled your silly little hot dog pjs back up and headed out the door, down the hallway in the direction of your room, hoping to find dean in your body.

as you stood in front of the door you heard faint moans and a vibrating sound, your eyes widened “oh my god..” you whispered to yourself, he’s not- is he? you stepped a bit closer to the door, your ear gently resting against the wood trying to pick up on more noise, the moans continued.

dean found your bunny vibrator, that’s for sure. a sudden idea lit up in your brain and a smirk grew on your face. you grabbed the door handle and without knocking you opened the door, making dean jump and pull the toy out. “whoa hey do you knock?!” he spoke in your voice, it was odd to hear your own voice like that.

“well this is my room dean” you smirked, crossing your arms and leaning against the doorframe. “and that is my toy you’re using”

you tilted your head slightly as you caught a glimpse of a completely different angle of your coochie. “wow my pussy looks so pretty from this angle” you couldn’t stop yourself from complementing.

you walked into the room and closed the door behind you, locking it and slowly stepping closer towards dean in your body, on your bed, your toy in his hand. “i see curiosity got the best of you… need some help with that?” you offered with a smirk.

thank you so much for reading! feedback and reblogs are always deeply appreciated <3

tags: @jensino @emeraldcrs @soldiersgirl @jensenacklesballsack @missus-ackles @littlesoulshine @deanswifeyy @slut4jackles @h8aaz @bruisedfig @angelicjackles @losers-clvb @lyarr24 @cowboysandcigarettes @blossomingorchids @bluemerakis @rositaslabyrinth @deanspookiebear @tinas111 @bejeweledinterludes @miss-marmalade @pinksatinpanties @multiversefanfics @cupidzbunny @sunnyteume @mrsanakinwinchesterpoldark @krabog

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[mscherub]

Emotional Support Shrimp

A/N: cutely drops in this fic I’ve had in my drafts for months…I’m still working on the Idia request. AND FOR THE OTHER PPL WHO REQUESTED STUFF I SEE U, I’m just unmotivated…Writers block is kicking my ass 😞

Tags: A little dark, supposed to be funny, fluff, Floyd being a menace…

Warnings:

Floyd leech causes harm (when doesn’t he?)

Violence

mentions of injuries (random student, referee)

suggestive towards the end

Swearing

Honestly, when is money not always a huge feat for you? The day you finally get your allowance from Crowley, it’s gone within a minute from being spent on only a portion of needed items. Last week you ended up running out of tuna for Grim, and for the love of the seven you don’t wanna go through that again. Everyone knew of your situation, wasn’t very hard to see, but you weren’t the type to latch on to others and use them like a pay pig, but many offered which is a little concerning, anyways, to each their own, you suppose. You had your own values to follow, but you did appreciate what they were willing to do.

Azul knew quite fondly of your situation, using you as a “backup” employee for when one of the servers or dishwasher at the lounge decided to call off, and you usually accepted because, hey, money! He didn’t exactly trust you in the kitchen, mainly based off of the liabilities he could face since you didn’t even have birth records or anything that he could “ok” for you to work within that vicinity, but everything else was a great option.

The laborious shifts were no stranger to you after having taken up a position there so many times, you could say you were used to it by this point, and an even bigger achievement, used to the ways of the tweels, specifically Floyd. Yes they were unpredictable, yes they were scary when they wanted to be, yes they gave off mafia vibes, but they somehow “accepted” you, accepted, of course, being a very vague term to describe it. Maybe tolerate is a bit better. They didn’t seem to wish to cause harm or other masses of stress like they would just for funsies with other guys around campus, but if push comes to shove, you bet they’d have no doubt and chuck you under the bus in mere seconds, hence why you try and stay on their good side.

Technically they all owe you one in a way, especially Azul with his little overblot, but that’s something in the past for you at least.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Incident One: Ice Bath

“Prefect, go reason with him!” Azul barks out the command. You sigh and turn around from his office and go to find Floyd. A cycle that repeats itself. Free Therapist for Floyd is a good title…no, wait no. Doesn’t make sense. Plaything would be more appropriate. The thought makes you shudder and shake your head.

The click of the dress shoes on the ground, the clamor of people in the lounge, drowns out as your thoughts officially take over.

This time Floyd messed around more than he should have with people on Azul’s black list, and he may or may not have gotten carried away. So now you’re back on the hunt to find him after getting an earful from the boss himself, and hearing him and the troublemaker bicker in his office. Fun times here at Mostro Lounge. Why’d you choose to work here. Should have asked Mr. Sam if he needed any help…

The door to the pool is stuck wide open and once you peer your head inside you see Floyd swimming in circles angrily, the water rippling swiftly around his body.

“Floyd.” You call out. It’s almost akin to a gentle coo. Where did that gentleness come from? Whatever…

“Wanna swim, Shrimpy? I’ll promise not to drown you.” He stops and smirks. Ok. Stay away from the water. “Or if you came here to chat…we can see if I’ve got the patience for that right now.” He sighs.

“Azul—“

“I don’t wanna hear it. Quit your yapping and go swim around somewhere else.” His eyes narrow and his fins tense.

“Look. If you just got back to work then—“ you’re cut off again.

“Work is the last thing I wanna do right now.” He glares at you, but then eerily a smirk forms once he beckons you over. “You can cheer me up if you swim with me.”

“I have to get back to working too— and ok, never mind…”

He hoists himself up onto the tiled floor, half of his tail still swaying in the water. And then he pouts at you. It shouldn’t do anything to sway your determination to get him on track again, but it crumbles down those walls and you find yourself walking towards him.

“Yay! You do like me a little at least then, Shrimpy.” He giggles, and before you know it he grabs your wrist and slips back into the water, pulling you in with him.

It’s cold. OH IT’S SUPER COLD!

Thrashing your arms in the water you bob back up to the surface, your uniform hat drifting away to the other side of this might-as-well-be ice bath. This was a lot colder than you remember when you went down to the sea the one time…

“Hah! Cold? Humans are just so weak…” Floyd’s voice rumbles from behind you and his slick, slimy arms wrap around your soaked clothes that act as a second skin, yet barely do anything to keep the bite of the cold away.

“But you’re my Shrimpy so I’ll keep ya safe.”

His warmth is shared with yours now, but it’s not enough, unfortunately.

“Floyd…lemme outta here. It so fucking cold holy shit.”

He giggles at your misfortune and spins around a few times with you in his arms slowly.

His chin rests on your shoulder and a silence falls over you two. It’s not uncomfortable. But it’s short lived.

“Hold your breath!”

“Floyd, wait— No!!”

Bubbles spew out of your nose and you force your eyes open only to see mismatched ones gleaming with amusement.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“I can’t believe you two…the time spent, rather wasted, will be taken out of both of your checks. This is just unbelievable…” Azul groans. His hand runs down his face before he sets his elbows down on the desk and rubs his temples.

“Out of my office.”

The silence is loud as you two walk out, a towel wrapped around you and a sloppily dressed Floyd who was just earlier grumbling about having to drink that transformation potion.

“Do something like that again and…ugh…”

“Eh? I thought it was fun, Shrimpy! We’ll swim again soon for sure.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Incident Two: Plucked Petals

“Drag him back to work…” Again?

You heed Azul’s orders and you turn out of his office yet again, pushing open the door and heading on your way to search for the one and only…

He left midway through his shift. It had only been like 3 hours…and he already got “bored.” You’re just fed up with his excuses, and then you end up getting yelled at as well if you take too long. You need to get back on the clock, too, “be lucky I’m even paying you to go get him,” Azul says, “be lucky I even pay you in the first place,” Azul says. Ok…anyways.

Traces of Floyd are no where to be seen. He couldn’t have gone far in the span of, what? Five minutes? He had long legs, sure, but he—

“OFF WITH YOU’RE HEAD!”

Oh no. Oh no, no, no, no. You knew who that was. Great. Now you had to calm down two people! Lovely…

You jog around the corner of the mirror chamber to the path way only to see Floyd with rose petals scattered about around him and a very angry riddle with his arms crossed in an exponential amount of annoyance and anger, as well as an unamused look.

“Oh-“

Riddles head whips in your direction and you prepare yourself for the onslaught of complaints…

“He broke a rule!” Riddle says, “He ruined my flowers,” Riddle says, “He came onto Heartslabyul grounds without invite and unannounced,” Riddle says. You had enough.

“Yea. He uh…mhmmm. I’ll take him back, just…uncollar him…” your finger points over to Floyd. He’s actively tugging at it and trying to crane his neck downwards so he can gnaw it off…is he ok?

“This is not the first time this has happened. I’ve let him get away with his actions one too many times. I shall send this matter to Headmaster Crowley now if you’d excuse me, Prefect. I have more pressing matters to tend to than dwaddle on a sorry soul who doesn’t know basic decency…”

“Riddle…I get where you’re coming from but Azul will soon have my head if I don’t bring him back and myself…so uh.” You sway on your feet.

He thinks for a moment. You weren’t untrustworthy, so maybe he could let this slide— just kidding, he’s Riddle. With a stern look and a dismissive tone, he makes up his mind and drags Floyd away to the main building.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“And now Floyd has earned a suspension?” Jade hums as he wipes off a table.

“From entering any other dorm besides his own, prohibited to participate in any club activities or work at the lounge, and now Azul’s making me work his shift and mine for at least a week…until his suspension is up.”

“My, my…I’d say it was deserved. As much as Floyd is held dear to me, he causes the outcomes with his actions. He finds them to be quite amusing, however, greatly so once you get involved.”

“Yea— wait…when I get involved? Is he doing this stuff on purpose?” Your hands perch themselves on your hips.

“That I cannot tell you.”

“Ugh…”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Incident Three: Balling

“What the fuck…” That’s all that leaves your lips once you step into the gym. People are chatting loudly and quickly and the only message that you got from Ace was:

Help. Floyd did sum shit. Tell him to get a hold and hopefully plan his words right so he doesn’t get a law suit

Safe to say you are fairly concerned. You push through the crowd of kids and find the familiar redhead accompanied by Jamil. Ace doesn’t let you speak one word once his eyes land on you.

“Ok, before you get all mad here, Prefect, you were the first one I decided to call cause uh…you know. You’re closer to the twins than anyone else really…” Ace attempts to reason with you but you’re entirely focused on something else. Someone else.

“Why is that guy passed out?”

The referee is surrounded by a few Sports med mages, all assessing the passes out form in the middle of the court. There’s a small pool of blood under his nose, which his nose is now plugged up with bits of gauze.

“Ok, yea. So…Floyd was given a penalty and he kinda hurled the ball at the ref…now he’s…” he motions vaguely to the motionless form. “Kinda knocked out. Probably has a broken nose. The look on the ref’s face was kinda priceless, though—“

Jamil smacks Ace and sighs.

“What?!”

“Floyd stormed off…” Jamil nods. That much is expected.

“Ok then…I shall…go find him.”

The suns setting. There’s a nice orange hue casted across the land. The setting would be really amazing to gawk at if it wasn’t for the task at hand. To find the culprit and ease him down from his hot headedness…you’re fine.

“Floyd—“

A hand grips your shoulder and turns you around. Face pressed against sweaty skin in under a second and you know who it is.

“Gross! Floyd!” His arms squeeze and, yep, don’t even try and breathe.

“That damn ref, you know? So sensitive! All I did was just trip someone…a couple times. RSA was kicking our asses again…just a tiny bit of foul play never hurt anyone…at least not too bad. Sports back in the sea were more fun!” His hold is steadfast.

“I once broke some poor guppies arm in a sport back home. Scuttle Ship. Fun game. And then I ripped his fins.”

“O-oh…ok…uh. On accident?” You struggle to keep your face from being muffled against his skin.

“Nah. Whole point of the game…whoever comes out less hurt is the winner.”

Oh…oh.

“Fun game…why are you here, anyways? Did ya come to watch the game? Hope you were gonna cheer for me.” His embrace, eases up.

“Uh, yea…and also I was worried…to see that you kinda left after what went down in the gymnasium…”

“Eh. He was a dumb ref like I said…”

You pause and clear your throat. “Your team needs you again…even id you’ll probably be benched.”

“Well then there’s no point in me going back. Plus. You’re better to hang around. I didn’t wanna play that game today, anyways…whaddya say we go scare some students walking around this late, huh?”

“Floyd…”

“Cmon.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Last shift of the week! Yay! You just gotta tough it out. Easier said than done. You’ll get your paycheck and then off to Heartslabyul to get Grim and then probably get force-fed some pastries by Trey which you’ll happily accept, and then back to Ramshackle.

“Jade, where’s Floyd? I need these orders for table 12, like now…” you huff as you shift the tray out from under your arm and place it down on the counter, looking back in the kitchen through the doubles doors that swing at their hinges. Articulating back and forth in a fluid motion.

“He got called into Azul’s office.” He hums as he idly writes down things on his notepad

“Again?” That’s just great news for you. “If I have to call him down again I might just quit for real this time.”

Jade doesn’t even turn his head at your words. There ones you’ve said before yet you’re still here.

“Always, he’s been slacking off, as usual.” He smiles. “I can go ask the cooks where the meals are if you’d like.”

“I’d…appreciate it. I need the tips from customers tonight so I need all the tables I can get. Thanks a bunch.” You sigh, leaning against the counter and pulling out your phone. You read a few of the messages sent to various group chats you were in, the first year group chat oddly talking about how Professor Crewel is, quote, “a kinky mf.” Yea, you’re just gonna put your phone away again…were they wrong though?

Jade comes back out carrying another circular tray, you straighten up and you take it off of him. “Thank you, Jade. You’re a financial savior for me.” You chuckle as you move your hand around on the bottom till it rests balanced on your palm.

“It was nothing, really.” He gives a small bow and goes back to his duties.

You head off again back into the seating areas, weaving through the crowds of people who were, for some reason, standing instead of sitting and ending up in your way. You make it over to your section and then over to the table, bending your knees a bit as you place the tray down on a smaller foldable table off to the side. A random plate is selected and you put on your happy face and act for the people sitting around in the booth.

“Here you are, the seafood bake, uh, then you, you got the lobster dish here…then you ordered the salmon, and then you ordered the snow crab! That’s it I believe? Does anybody need anything before I head off?” You clasp your hands together and look frantically around the table as you wait and watch for any of them to speak. You’re met with small shakes of their heads and soft sighs of no’s, taking the hint and giving one last bright smile before you nod and walk off.

Off in the distance, a muffled slam of a door is heard and you see Floyd walking out of Azul’s office, a grimace etched onto his face as he heads back into the kitchen and passes by Jade, who, just glares at him before he goes to finish his own tasks.

You knew what would happen next, Azul would find you, then make you “calm him down.” It was never something you liked mainly because it was putting your life at risk, which was ironic because Azul explicitly stated he didn’t want you partaking in any harmful activities, but whatever. It’s sadly another small side job that’s forced upon you just so Floyd can get back to work himself. All for money…

The other waiters grab dishes and scurry off, moving far away. The chatter and yelling within the kitchen dies down significantly, going quiet as pots and pans slam against the stove top, the only culprit of that being Floyd. You take one breath in before you go inside and pick out the teal-ish colored hair from the other bundles of students and walk over to him as calmly as you could. It’s better to do the things you know that you’ll be asked to do before they happen, so…you got this. And you’re only doing it because you know you’ll be asked to and totally not because you like Floyd maybe a little. That’s not it. Definitely not it. He’s scary why would you like him? Exactly. Anyways! No sweat! It’s just Floyd…that’s it! Just Floyd and no worries…everything will go swell and you’ll all be happy again! Maybe he’ll break a few ribs when he squeezes you but that’s nothing…you’ll just be magicked up later by the nurse mage and you’ll be just fine. Just fine. You’re sweating. Shit—

“Hey, Floyd. What happened.” You sigh with a slight pout on your face. He doesn’t even look at you, his face contorting even more into a look that said “leave me the fuck alone.” It was worth a shot…he usually found that to be a dumb look on you but I guess not today. Oh no. He’s royally pissed right now. Hopefully Azul didn’t sneak a waiver somewhere in that working contract you signed…

You straighten up and glance at the other chefs in the kitchen, all of them giving you questioning gazes. One in the back clasps his hands together and bows his head and— wait, is this guy really praying right now? Geez…

“Floyd…” you try again.

He works away harder at the random meal he’s cooking. The contents already looked charred…

“Don’t wanna talk, Shrimpy,” He huffs, “Go.” He says gruffly.

“I’m not gonna go—“

“I’m busy! Since Azul wants me working my fins off then you know what, I’ll do just that!” He spits out. It sounds threatening, filled with warnings, but before you could try one last time to get him to ease up, one of the students bumps into him, sending the dishes they were carrying flying into the air. The guy stumbles back, food splattering on the floor and plates shattering, Floyd acting like a brick wall and staying still as he slowly turns to look down at him. No words are exchanged. None at all. He simply dumps the hot oil and food that he had into the pan onto him.

Screaming, yelling, a lot goes on within the span of a few seconds. Azul comes in, Jade follows behind, other waiters peer into the kitchen to see what’s going on.

You take the initiative and you grab Floyd’s arm while he’s distracted and take the pan from out of his grasp and set it back down on the stove. You turn the burner off and you look back at him, then to the, now injured, guy upon the floor.

“Floyd. This is coming out of your check, and you’re banned from the kitchen.” Azul comes over quickly with an aura of anger. Floyd rolls his eyes and pushes past him to walk out.

“Prefect, go after him, will you? I don’t need him hurting another person who doesn’t deserve it.” Azul waves his hand at the situation. It was common so no one really took much time to dwell on it since Floyd partook in these types of activities just to pass the time. A common occurrence if you will.

Azul gives you one last stern glance to tell you again silently to go do what he had asked of you. You reluctantly nod and you go out to search for him. It’s absurd, really, having to do all of this. It’d be better if they left him alone to blow off some steam, but no, you have to go calm him down, you have to be the one to watch him like a helicopter parent.

You go to the tweels shared room and knock on the door. It was a just a guess he’d be in his room, but you silently hoped he wasn’t so you’d have some time to avoid either a life or death situation. You liked your life at least a little now…

Silence. You’re met with silence. Ok, try again, just once more to make sure he’s not in there. You knock again, a little louder this time and announcing yourself to being there. And silence again. Maybe fate is helping you out today…

“Floyd? Are you in there?.” You’re about to knock one last time when the door is quickly ripped open, an angry Floyd peering down at you. Brows furrowed, eyes squinted and dark, glazed over with frustration and anger, a scowl etched into his lips. Yep…and here you were, standing in front of him, practically helpless and without anywhere to run because you know he’d find that a fun game and catch up to you in a second.

You straighten up under his gaze and clear the lump in your throat that you didn’t even know formed.

“Hey…”

Floyd doesn’t make any noises, instead opting for what he likes to do when he’s this mad, and wraps his arms around you and squeezes tight. He brings you into the room and closes the door with his foot, going over to his bed and taking you down with him as he nuzzles his cheek against yours.

You try and squirm out of his arms but he’s insanely strong and the efforts you make are useless. You’re already waiting for your back to make a popping noise…

“Floyd— heyyyy…let me go.” You murmur out as you struggle to breathe with all this extra weight on top of you.

“Shhh, Shrimpy. Quiet.” He mutters. He moves his face to the crook of your neck, his warm breath fanning against the side, which in turn causes you to tense up. What the fuck is he doing. You try to shrink away, but that was a mistake because he squeezes you against him even more.

He brushes his lips over your pulse point and smirks, but it quickly fades away as he opts to keep his face pressed up against your neck, not doing anything. He likes to feel your heart racing…

“Always trying to make me feel better, Shrimpy…” he sighs. “And you do…meh, sometimes…you don’t have to listen to Azul…but ya do. Starting to wonder if you just like being around me…” he nuzzles into you again, teeth grazing your skin.

“For one, I kinda have to listen to Azul…” you whisper. “I can’t be like you with him. Plus…I don’t mind you all that much since—“ he squeezes again. For sevens sake. “Ease up! I don’t mind you, yea…you’re fine to be around. That’s it.”

“Liar…” he chuckles. “You’re so silly…” he pulls his face up and looks at you, his mismatched eyes calculating, inspecting that gaze in your eyes towards him.

“You’re stupid, too…for liking someone like me. But it’s so cute, Shrimpy.” His lips quirk up into a smirk and he bears his razor sharp teeth to you. “I could easily hurt you, Shrimpy….”

“That sounds vaguely like a threat but…you don’t really hurt me— not ever actually. Scare me? Yes…but not hurt.” you murmur. His smile softens a bit and he nods, moving his forehead to rest against yours. If you weren’t already flushed, you were now.

“No…but I could, that’s the point.” He giggles before moving away again. He was teasing. “Do you know why I don’t?” He hums as he sits up, letting his arms unravel from around you. He looks out the window connected to the sea. You sit up as well, taking in a well deserved breath of air.

He’s silent for a moment, watching as the fish pass by without a care. Your uniform is all wrinkled now, great—

“Cause I’d be kinda pissed off without you around, y’know. And not just how I usually am…I’d be mad all the time.”

You stop. He stops and looks at you. You make very awkward eye contact with him, but both of your gazes soften. That’s sweet of him in his own way. Quite frankly you didn’t think he was capable of that since it’s not usually like him. Why is your heart beating a bit quicker now? This time it’s not so much out of stress or the fear of being eaten alive, Floyd looks fairly sated so…what’s this feeling for…

“What do you think of me, hmmm?”

You don’t know how to respond to that. Does he actually care what people think? No, not really. You see that all the time with how he even talks to teachers. But if you had to say, the few people he listens to, slightly, are Jade, Azul, and…you. That doesn’t mean anything! This is an odd question coming from him. “I think you’re…ok. Being around you is fun sometimes…uh…I don’t really know.” That’s great. You probably ticked him off more…

“Just ‘ok’? Ouch, Shrimpy…” he pouts as he looks at you. He inches his face closer to yours again, personal space being far out of the question at the moment. He looks down to your lips before smirking again and then locking on to your eyes.

“You just saying that cause you’re hiding something?”

That’s not…you weren’t, no. Definitely not. You didn’t really want to say how well he made you smile or laugh on days where you were down, or that he cared that much to make you happy again. Or whenever he’d always seem to find you to be his go to person to bug now for, well, everything he did.…you didn’t wanna say you liked getting him out of trouble, didn’t want to tell him you do enjoy being around him, he’d get all smug about it…and that’s it! Totally nothing else behind it. Nope.

“Be honest, Shrimpy. You like me? Cause I like you…for some reason.” He sighs. He moves closer again.

Kinda straight forward, no?

“What…huh?! WAIT WHAT?” you manage to stammer out. Floyd nods along to your words with an unimpressed look.

“I like you.”

“I heard you the first time!”

“Do you like me?”

“Ok…well…no! Wait…maybe? Yes? How do I even answer that right away?!” You’re freaking out and he’s enjoying it.

His smirk widens again and he laughs at you…this guy.

“See? Silly Shrimpy…” his arms lace back around you and his face is right in front of yours again.

Without taking anything else into consideration, Floyd pushes his lips against yours.

You don’t move, you don’t try and push him away, and out of all the times Floyd has ever given you a chance to stop him in any of his acts, you could tell this moment was one of them. His eyes are still locked onto yours, lidded and a smirk forming, gaging your reaction. His arms barely touch your body, giving you a chance to get the fuck out if you’d want to. But you don’t move away. You push your lips against his more and you flutter your eyes closed. Floyd takes the hint and he holds you again, though this time, it’s gentle.

After a moment you both pull away, a goofy grin across his face. “Hmmmm…” he giggles, “I feel a lot better now, Shrimpy. See? I’m bored now…cmon, let’s go somewhere and ditch that stupid work Azul’s got us doing…”

So! Wasn’t the best, yes, I know, but it’s something…

Also I feel like some parts from my courting fic for Floyd wiggled its way in here—

Master List

Please don’t steal or copy any of my work! You may, however, reblog if you’d want to!

Pictures belong to Disney Twisted Wonderland but are edited by me :)