#because those are still self-expression in a visual form

[threshie]

⬆️⬆️⬆️

Ayup. They took without asking, opting in literal billions of images without permission and swearing it's not copyright violation because the results aren't derivative. If it wasn't derivative, they wouldn't need to feed the AI art in order to make anything.

"ai is making it so everyone can make art" Everyone can make art dipshit it came free with your fucking humanity

[calits-now-ontheside]

Analysis of the EGO Pink Shoes – Hong Lu – Between Loss of Will and Manifestation of Desire

It's been a while since I wanted to analyse all the EGOs of Hong Lu and I finaly found some time while not being able to draw. I know it has already been done numerous time and I may or may not bring anything new but it is always so fun to analyse all these little details.

So let's start with Roseate Desire:

Roseate Desire is the name of the E.G.O linked to the Abnormality Pink Shoes, which is also related to the Abnormality Red Shoes.

Shared with: Ishmael

Cost: 4 Lust and 2 Envy

I’d like to begin this analysis by quoting a sentence from @sunshades from their analysis of Ishmaël that perfectly encapsulates the intention behind this EGO and immediately reveals the themes running through it:

“It’s more about a loss of your free will and being controlled by an external force.”

Summary:

Origin of the EGO: Pink Shoes and Red Shoes

Pink Shoes: A Parasitic Abnormality

Hong Lu: Between Puppet and Puppeteer

What if Hong Lu wanted to be in control?

Lust & Envy: Revealing Sins

I/ Origin of the EGO: Pink Shoes and Red Shoes

This EGO is drawn from an abnormality derived from Red Shoes, known for amplifying the desires and obsessions of those who wear them. It is therefore relevant to start by analyzing Red Shoes and Pink Shoes together in order to better understand how they function.

These two abnormalities share a central theme: control through desire. They possess the power to enslave the individual through their own cravings.

One of the first visible signs of this control manifests through a pinkish glow in the host’s eyes.

In Lobotomy Corporation, this glow in the eyes of Red Shoes’ hosts indicates that the individual is about to confess their deepest desires to the abnormality.

In Pink Shoes, this glow seems permanent. This could indicate that the desire here is more constant, diffuse, less sudden but more invasive.

Why this difference? Perhaps because lust and desire are more similar in their slow consumption than aggressiveness, which erupts with force.

Indeed, Red Shoes manifests desire through aggressiveness, while Pink Shoes manifests it through lust — if we look at their Sin Affinity. (Have to thanks @firestorm09890's post for helpin me seeing clearer on the subject)

Thus, even if both abnormalities play on desire, they express it in different ways:

Red Shoes = Desire → Violence

Pink Shoes = Desire → Seduction, pleasure, subjugation

A telling example is the employee from Lobotomy Corp who, frustrated by unrequited love, becomes violent under the influence of Red Shoes. Here, even though the base theme is love, it’s the expression of desire through anger that is central, because that’s the nature of Red Shoes.

Conversely, with Pink Shoes, it is through almost sensual and suggestive visual elements (ribbons, poses, implicit BDSM codes) and through a feeling of pleasure that desires are manifested, as seen with Hong Lu and Ishmael.

II/ Pink Shoes: A Parasitic Abnormality

1rst Quick Thought: For me—and for many others, if not everyone—E.G.O and Sinners must share a certain kind of resonance. The Sinner (often unconsciously, I think) recognizes a part of themselves in the Abnormality, and the Abnormality, in turn, reflects that part back. It’s this shared element that enables the manifestation of the E.G.O and allows a bond to form between them. However, that shared aspect doesn't have to be the same for every Sinner. After all, an Abnormality can embody multiple themes or ideas simultaneously.

2nd Quick Thought: Still from my point of view, the initial (non-overclocked) use of an Abnormality E.G.O is more closely tied to the Sinner. At that stage, the Abnormality is still held in check, and its history or consciousness doesn’t yet deeply influence the Sinner’s psyche and behaviour. The lines spoken and the visual elements (sprites, etc.) in this phase seem to be more reflective of the Sinner’s own self rather than of the Abnormality

3rd Quick Note: In contrast, the overclocked state clearly allows the Abnormality to exert more influence—taking up more mental and symbolic space within the Sinner. Its psyche begins to seep into the Sinner, even if it remains loosely aligned with their theme or the shared connection between them. That’s why I’m a bit hesitant to interpret overclocked E.G.O lines as being direct expressions of a Sinner’s personal thoughts. To me, these moments are more about the Abnormality expressing itself through the Sinner’s identity, or more precisely, through that shared facet between them.

Last Quick Thought: That being said, even if it’s mostly the Abnormality speaking in this state, the themes or ideas being voiced and in some cases their sprites are still worth paying attention to when analyzing a Sinner—because that idea might be exactly what enabled their bond to form in the first place.

However, for this particular E.G.O, you’ll see that the corrosion may actually be more closely linked to the Sinner than usual.

Now let’s focus on Pink Shoes alone.

With this EGO, the two characters who embody it express variations of the same theme:

Hong Lu: lack of control, loss of free will

Ishmael: obsessive desire, absolute control of desire over will

What is interesting is that the employes reanimated by Pink shoes -- Pink Shoes Enchantee and Pink Shoes Possesse -- seems to represent the 2 aspects of Pink Shoes -- being possessed and being enchanted. And it seems that this is the same thing for Ishmael, representing the enchanting side and Hong Lu representing the possessing side of the abnormality.

Another notable fact: Pink Shoes seems to be the only EGO whose corroded form is represented in its main art. This could indicate that it's worth focusing more on that form than on the base one. Observing the corroded forms of Hong Lu and Ishmael, we note:

The corrosion from Pink Shoes is less violent and “encompassing” than that of other abnormalities. Even Red Shoes expresses its personality more than Pink Shoes does.

It is more intimate, more personal — it doesn’t manifest the will of the abnormality, but that of the host’s desire. What corrodes the host is their desire pushed to the extreme and how it manages to take control.

I would say that in a way, Pink Shoes is not an autonomous, conscious, or imperious abnormality. It acts like a parasite that lives and spreads through the desires of the host. It has no will of its own beyond its instinct to spread, like mold or a fungus. Pink Shoes has only one desire — that of spreading itself and its ribbons through others’ desires.

Thus, corrosion here can be interpreted as the external manifestation of a deeply repressed inner desire, taking control of its host.

Is the corrosion the host’s extreme desire possessing them?

The image of the pink ribbon invading the host’s body is central. It evokes both:

Constraint (bindings, bondage)

Manipulation (puppet strings)

And this idea of the puppet is especially predominant with Hong Lu, more than with Ishmael.

III/ Hong Lu: Between Puppet and Puppeteer

Hong Lu, in his idle sprite, stands like a limp puppet, hanging and waiting to be set in motion. The ribbons trail on the ground, like strings ready to be pulled.

All of this suggests a person being manipulated to satisfy others’ desires.

Even the EGO art shows Hong Lu suspended, vulnerable, dependent on the ribbon — and therefore on an external will.

But what’s even more striking: in his corroded form, his mouth is covered by a pink ribbon.

This means he doesn’t even have the right to speak, not even to express a personal desire. He is instrumentalized, stripped of any personal will.

With Ishmael, it’s the eye that is covered. She can only see her obsessive desire, represented by Pink Shoes.

Her will for vengeance is strong — but ends up consumed by the pleasure and desire distilled by Pink Shoes. She then becomes the agent of propagation for this abnormality, bound to its ribbons, as we see in her corroded form, where she now speaks of charming and wrapping up. Which is Pink Shoes’ primary desire.

Whereas, Hong Lu's desire expressed in its corroded version (so its strongest version) has taking over his mouth so by preventing him from expressing himself and by instrumentalizing him and reducing him to nothing more than a puppet to be manipulated.

And yes, the theme of being others' puppent, deprived of self is a main theme for Hong Lu.

But is that really all there is to it?

IV/ What if Hong Lu wanted to be in control?

One intriguing detail: his weapon is not his usual one. Here, he wears two pairs of gloves. Why, when Ishmael has kept the same weapon shape?

If we follow the puppet theme… gloves are hands that manipulate. What if these gloves were the expression of a deep and unconscious desire from Hong Lu?

What if, despite his apparent passivity in the face of his lack of autonomy, his true desire was to be in control (of himself) — even if that means controlling what controls him?

He would then become the puppeteer of his own puppet. A disturbing mise en abyme:

Unable to see himself as the one in control of his choices, he is forced to separate his desire and place it as his own puppeteer in order to make decisions for himself. Hong Lu cannot act without being someone’s puppet / being told what to do — and even if his desire is to be in control, he can only do so by being his own puppeteer.

Hong Lu is manipulated by Pink Shoes but uses the gloves to manipulate in turn. Pink Shoes makes Hong Lu into the puppeteer, becoming the puppeteer of his own body — a tragic paradox between submission and illusory control.

Maybe we can even link this idea to this diaologue:

What reinforces this idea is that during his corrosion attack, threads appear, connected to Hong Lu at his various joints. These threads pull Hong Lu’s target… but he himself remains pulled by Pink Shoes. He is both author and tool, master and slave.

And even in his non-corroded state, Hong Lu already speaks of “Tie you just enough,” which for me can have two meanings:

Hong Lu, even by giving himself the role of puppeteer of his own body, is still not truly in control since he is already following someone else’s will — that of Pink Shoes, whose will is to bind people with her ribbons. After all, his regular and corroded attack animations are very similar, which might suggest that from the beginning, when desire is involved, Hong Lu is unable to manifest one stronger than the desire to fulfill others’ wishes.

As it has always been the case for him, Hong Lu controls and manipulates by applying just enough pressure / constraint for it to seem natural. This control is just enough to feel normal, but also not enough to be questioned. Maybe that's supposed to be a hint to the way Hong Lu is controlled.

V/ Lust & Envy: Revealing Sins

Lastly, a quick note on the Sins required to activate the Pink Shoes EGOs, which are revealing:

Hong Lu: Lust & Envy

Ishmael: Lust & Wrath

Lust is shared by both Ishmael and Hong Lu, which makes sense since that is how desires manifest through Pink Shoes.

Indeed in this case, lust is, I think, only referring to Pink Shoes' will to spread and that can be confirmed by Hohenheim's definition of the sins:

"The meaning of Peccatulum Luxuriae, 'Lust', is not exactly what it says on the tin. A more illustrative description would say that it is... ah, yes. An obsession to spread a fragment of what forms the self."

Since Pink Shoes manifest through lust, I don't think that in this case it refers to the sinners. The abnormality clearly want to spread a fragment (the ribbons) of what form its self (the shoes).

So, that being say we have to look at the other sin, that is from where the deep desire is taken from and from which the shoes are goind to feed themselves and implify.

Where Hong Lu requires Envy, Ishmael requires Wrath.

Because Ishmael’s deep desire — her desire for vengeance — was born from her anger and her will to destroy Ahab.

But why Envy for Hong Lu? Two possible explanations in my view:

Because his desire was born from others’ envy to control his life

Or because deep down — and I like to believe this — even if it’s repressed and unconscious, one of Hong Lu’s deepest desires is to be in control, even of himself. Dare I even say he envies Pink Shoes for being able to control him? Maybe it’s an extrapolation, and yet I wonder — why not?

Perhaps it’s an extrapolation. Or perhaps not. After all, isn’t it one of the most human things: to desire that which dominates us, just so we no longer feel lost?

Unfortunately, I didn't really dwell on Hong Lu's eye during this post because I thinkt it will be more interesting to do a post about everytime the jade was active, but that will be for another time!

[neptunes-sol-angel]

Just a little reminder that everyone has a feminine and masculine side, so don't hesitate to read the messages for your masculine side too.

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Pile One 🕺

BEYONCÉ - COZY

Right away, I’m detecting that this pile is trying to work through some bitterness and that’s ok. I get the gist that this collective is aware of this and are either accepting of it or in denial of it because of the assumption that it’s embarrassing or demeaning to feel that way. I always want to remind people that it’s okay to feel negative emotions. Having them is not what defines you but how you choose to express them is how it truly characterizes you. It feels like this brooding energy is like a seesaw or a visual representation of tug of war, because it’s happening in two different directions. This pile could be in limbo with trying to reach the other side of realizing your self-worth. There’s bitterness split into two directions. Acerbic agony over “why not me?” in terms of finding people who accept and match the love that you give to others and “why me?” when it comes to jealousy and vitriol that makes you afraid of your own potential for success and dim your light. What your feminine side is asking of you is to stop watering yourself down because you feel it’s safer that way to be under others. Take note of the vibe that you get from this channeled song because it’s time to get “cozy” with who you are and take some initiative in the lessons that you’ve been through by talking your shit. You sat with your pain long enough to know its beginning but to finally decide how YOU want to create its end. If you’re in a funk where it’s making you feel meek and want to self-sabotage, reach deep inside yourself to know that the answer isn’t to revert back to old patterns and lies that people told you to keep you stuck because they don’t want to see you grow. Get cozy with yourself because you must understand that every step of the way isn’t going to be comfortable all of the time but I feel that a lot of you are at a point where things are getting worse before they get better. It could be something external going on, but I feel that it’s mostly mental. You’re going to come out of this even stronger than before and you’re going to move differently and choose differently but also get an upgrade relating to speech. How you talk to yourself will improve, you’ll speak with more confidence, and your words will match exactly with your feelings when it comes to communicating with others. The main thing that I am seeing here is no longer trying to make accommodations that make you suffer in the end just to protect another person’s ego.

Pile Two 🕺

BEYONCÉ -MOVE

I’m sensing a lot of completion with this pile. If you’re not in this new energy yet, prepare for people making a lot of misconceptions about you. You could be accused of being aloof or have people nitpicking or trying to diagnose you based on little to no evidence. It doesn’t have to be this exact situation but what I first would like to point out is that it’s like, you’re floating down this river, unphased, and just flowing with the currents. Or that you’re water itself, becoming mutable with your form but regardless of what changes are made, you’re still water. If you’ve experienced intense feelings over people ghosting you or just not prioritizing you in the past, I’m seeing that you’ll be at a stage where you understand that what those people did wasn’t at all right and you’re no longer internalizing it with your thoughts and actions, but in other words, you’re not going to be that person anymore that’s waiting for a text. You’re not going to wait for people to act right, wait for other people’s approval, or postpone your life for people who like to play with your time. I’m getting the message that you shouldn’t stop yourself from doing whatever it is that you think about doing because “they will talk about you either way”. This could apply to promoting yourself in some way, maybe for a new job opportunity, or just taking a chance to improve your health. You may have anxiety of thinking that maybe there’s no point in trying to see what you can do for your body because you’ve been stagnant for years because of circumstances that weren’t really in your control, like finances or being dependent on a toxic parent. This could also be something else, but either way it’s like you’re afraid of what you could hear, possibly something negative or even just a “no”, but I’m hearing you can’t make that judgment without trying, because you might actually receive a yes, assistance in getting back on your feet again, or good news about your timing in getting something done before you could miss out on what’s important.

Pile Three 🕺

BEYONCÉ - CUFF IT

A rebirth is needed for this pile. There’s a lot of indulgence that feels mindless and endless because you’re seeking to satiate a need or needs but there are people who are already aware of this but are in need of confirmation for which way is the right direction to go. It’s about experiencing everything for the first time all over again. Not in a dreadful way to make you suffer, but to soothe any worries over not finding happiness if you don’t have that “one thing”. If you’ve been tested recently on remaining brave in your decision to part ways with someone but are having second doubts or the fear that you’re going to miss out, maybe that “need” that you have can be replenished by just being around your family to remind yourself that you aren’t lacking love and support around you. If you’re feeling “sexual”, maybe it isn’t sex that you necessarily need and that it’s just your soul telling you to create. If you’ve been used to seeking answers through spiritual measures but are still left confused, then maybe that’s a sign that it’s time to step back and take a break from the unseen and to come back and relearn how to go through life from just being instead of trying to know everything. Even if it isn’t those specific scenarios previously mentioned, you’re on a journey of wisdom of learning that a lot of the things that you’ve considered as losses haunting your everyday life, were not really losses, because they can be replaced by something else that’s going to lead you into falling more in love with yourself.

[nattikay]

Evolution of my fursona/art style over the past 15 years. Say what you will, but I genuinely think fursonas as a concept are a fascinating form of self-expression and just find it interesting to look back and track the changes of not only my art skills/style but also of the way I chose to present myself at various points in my life.

I had two distinct art "phases" during my teenage years. The first one was around middle school, in which I was your standard cringy furry kid on the internet with a plethora of brightly-colored Mary Sue OCs.

The second one was around high school and into college, at which point I got more serious about art (preparing to apply for the BYU animation program) and decided that I was too Mature™ for unnaturally colored characters, among other things (that's where I changed Natti's color scheme from blue to brown, and there were also a few years where she was actually changed to entirely white with no markings, though that iteration never got a ref sheet and therefore isn't represented here).

In retrospect I actually kinda view the second phase as cringier than the first. I don't regret the phase—I think it was overall beneficial to my art journey and I definitely learned a lot during it—I just wish I hadn't had such a stick up my butt about it. I wouldn't have worded it this way at the time, but I looking back I definitely had it in my head that I was a Special And Good Artist for figuring out that unrealistic colorful characters are Not Okay for whatever reason, and I lowkey looked down my nose at younger artists who "hadn't figured it out yet", which....yeeeeeeeah, that attitude was pretty cringe. But that's teenagers for ya, I suppose.

Anyways, I find it pretty fascinating that by complete coincidence, the current iteration of my fursona—who I designed as an adult and whose design has remained stable for around seven years now—happens to represent the color schemes of her iterations from both of those eras: the blue whimsy of the middle school iterations, and the brown and white of her high school iterations.

This wasn't intentional—fun fact, the reason the current version of my fursona has the white/brown/blue color scheme is that when I initially went to design her I was aiming for a dilute calico pattern, with the gray stylized to blue. I wound up abandoning the calico idea because I couldn't nail down a splotch pattern I was satisfied with, but kept the colors.

Yet despite the fact that it's coincidence, it's still pretty cool that my current fursona has those elements of all her predecessors, because it's as if all those phases and experiences and growth have come together to form the person I am now and it's represented visually.

It's also interesting how her design changed so often when I was a kid/teenager, but now as an adult it's stabilized.

like, idk, maybe I'm just looking wayyyy too deep into things here, but I feel like there's some sort of psychology at play lol. But who knows ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[pareidoix]

“Ha?”

Wanderer stopped dead in his tracks, before looking back to you—his traveling companion, having a nasty sneer in his expression.

“And yet,” one, two and three. Three paces to you, each step with a simultaneous shift in his expression, a growing smugness, tainting his lips.

“You're still here, traveling with me, continuing to travel with someone, who, vocally expresses that your existence is lesser, annoying, repulsive even.”

The words come out half bitter, effortlessly mixing a lie and a half truth, yet he'll maintain that expression, not for you—but for himself.

“Quite masochistic of you, don't you think?” He added, adjusting his hat as his eyes narrow to yours, eating up that chesire-like smile of which it becomes the cherry on top of his usual mockery.

Ah. It wasn't a few seconds after his statement, it happened in a haze, two blinks and you were already inches to his face, retaining that nauseating snarl, that repulsion now plastered onto your pretty, pretty facial features.

Wanderer remained tall, unmoving, his chin raised high and poised, and it was nothing but a mask, a facade, one he has perfected over the eons of his lifespan, but how can someone claim perfection, when he was far from the concept itself?

Your lips move, forming to say the nickname you gave for him. “I'm not the one with many names, with many sins, I don't manifest my struggles and turn those who surround me into ruin,” his expression falters, mirroring yours upon mention of his eventful history of bloodshed.

“Say more,” he was supposed to be the one to one-up you, to provoke you. “Go on,” he was the one who wanted to invoke a reaction from you.

But why?

Your back straightens, raising your chin to him, and the corners of your lips widen, widen and widen, it was an evil grin overruling his earlier attempt of smugness, it was attractive, malicious.

Why did he find himself so lost in that malice?

“You can't do anything,” his breath hitches, facial muscles waning control, confused, not knowing if he should act accordingly to your refute with a mirrored demeanor—or give up and let his face contort to something of excitement.

Your statements hold true as well, someone who accused you of lowly masochism, now finding himself in the same path with guilt, with pleasure.

Wasn't he just winning?

“Because you know that your progress of tranquility, will be for naught. Days, months, years worth of practiced peace, will be reduced to void, to nothingness.”

Veins formed, visible along his jaw. “You can't do anything,” you repeat, the winds shifting as you move past him. “Because, you enjoy it Kuni.”

His eyes widen, a disgruntled sound gracing your ears as he looks over his shoulder. “That's—!”

“The truth,” you let out a quiet 'hmhm', looking to the side, preying on his visuals in your peripheral.

“A truth you want to bask in, for it is better than the turmoil that gnaws at you overwhelmingly.”

You walk with grace, and Wanderer stills with unease, motionless with current-like thoughts, a redness now turbulent all over his face, as well as his clenched, trembling fists. He wanted more?

He wanted more. Wanderer wanted more—and that was enough to send him in a deep state of frenzy, along with an intensifying self loathing.

“I destest you,” he mumbles under his breath, bringing a hand to his hat to hide everything of him and his dignity, catching up but with a safe distance towards you, but you heard.

“No, I don't think you do.”

need him oiled up and begging

[thewonderfulwitchofthewest]

my thoughts on Wicked part 1 :D

(spoilers for act 2)

stuff that made me happy:

Absolutely loved and appreciated that there weren’t any huge song or scene removals, just smaller stylistic changes that were usually made to help things flow better

More emphasis being put on Elphaba’s midwife/primary caretaker being an Animal. That was one of the gripes I had from the musical, especially since it forms the basis of Elphaba’s motivations and empathy. Plus, the book was more prevalent about it as far as I remember

Elphaba causing the mural of The Wizard in Shiz’ welcome hall to crumble and reveal the Animal mural underneath was one of my fav additions!! What a clever way of pointing at that revisionist history, and also foreshadowing Elphaba herself being the one to uncover the truth behind The Wizard later.

The recurring For Good leitmotifs FUCK!! that was so mean of them, but so amazing

Set design went insanely hard, kudos to the team!! Everything was visually stunning! I’m in love with Shiz’ rotating library in particular, keeping to Wicked’s theme and aesthetic of circularity

Speaking of circularity, costume design also went incredibly hard!! Of course I miss some of the original designs, like Glinda’s yellow dress, but the new outfits brought in do feel similar to the ones that weren’t included, so I’m not pressed about it. I’m very happy that most if not all of Galinda’s outfits incorporated circles/curves (see above; also a nod to the bubble aesthetic)

Elphaba’s innocence and joyous whimsy in The Wizard and I!! So beautiful. She’s so outwardly excited and fantasizing so vividly, something she only expresses in the safety of her own solitude. But she has a chance, she’s free to explore something she never thought she could have before, she’s unlimited. Really great I Want song sequence

Original Dillamond is more humanoid and looks more refined as a professor imo. But I’ll admit, this Dillamond’s very endearing…he’s just a lil goat. And I love him :)

I really enjoyed all the The Wizard of Oz-like stylizations being included, like the title font. The references were great too, like the ‘ruby slippers’ in Popular

The gadgetry in general was super cool. Gotta love all those fun lil inventions, like Dr. Dillamond’s tea set that accommodates the fact that he doesn’t have hands

The vocals HOLY SHIT. Do I need to say anything?? I was blown out of my seat dude. Loved all of the little personal touches added into the songs, it felt so raw and close to what actresses would’ve done on stage

things that could’ve been better:

Honestly, my biggest issue is that I needed Elphaba to be more mean. I like my Elphabas blunt, and angry. She was grumpy and petty and bitter from the start, but was still a good person, and I loved that about her character. While I respect the decision to make this Elphaba more composed (possibly to garner more sympathy from the audience), she came off as a bit too somber and self-pitying for my liking. Elphaba is witty and sarcastic. She’s unapologetic, but knows when to yield. And most importantly, she’s very much fuelled by rage, as much as she’s moved by love and compassion. I hope part 2 brings in all her nuances and inner fire, because that would really elevate everything for me!

EDIT: As an extension to the point above, I do still love fiery Elphaba, but I recognize there was nuance in this particular decision for this version of her character! This is the insanely good post that changed my view of things (for the better)

Somewhat related, I was looking for a bit more oomph, more emotion and inflection in tone for some of the line deliveries. The ones off the top of my head would be Elphaba’s explanation about being green, and Glinda’s sadness over Fiyero’s changed behaviour at the train station. Maybe this is a nitpick, maybe it only makes sense on a stage, but yeah I do miss the intensity.

Overall, I’m not the biggest fan of Jonathan Bailey as Fiyero. No disrespect to him, but I think they could’ve found someone a bit less charming and more rogueish for Fiyero, especially since he’s supposed to be a troublemaker and an airhead in this act

Also no disrespect to Michelle Yeoh, but I’m not the biggest fan of her singing. I wasn’t that torn up about it. It came and went, that’s what I’ll say. As for her as Morrible acting-wise, she’s okay. I love when Morrible is more over-the-top and loud, but Michelle plays her quieter, sneakier. She’s got room to be more intimidating later on in part/act 2

godddd I wish we could’ve gotten new scenes with Elphaba and Fiyero because as fun as gelphie is, fiyeraba is a compelling dynamic to me too, and I think the movie could’ve taken a great opportunity to rectify what a lot of people’s problem is with the ship, aka it being too rushed. I would’ve loved to see an additional moment where they shared something with each other and only each other, like a personal tidbit about Fiyero’s life as a prince, or something he did at other schools, anything Elphaba could grasp onto and relate to in order to flesh out their relationship more, as two people who understand what it’s like to not be happy and seen for who they really are deep down

Even just making the I’m Not That Girl sequence more visually appealing would’ve been nice. I miss the poppy field. We lost that flower symbolism in this particular context, representing love, remembrance and hope for the future, which does encapsulate the basis of Elphaba and Fiyero’s relationship

The Defying Gravity sequence was of course absolutely incredible on several fronts, but it did feel a little clunky at times. Somehow the pacing was slower here than it was in the musical. I should feel my heart pounding alongside Elphaba and Glinda’s. Elphaba trying to steal The Wizard’s balloon was a nice touch though, I loved that.

Small gripe, but I would’ve loved more steampunk stuff incorporated (the train to the Emerald City was great!!), as well as the Time Dragon Clock somewhere (unless I missed it in the opening sequence?)

If I think of more, I’ll add it in later, but that’s pretty much it for now! I really enjoyed watching this movie. It was very well done and it captured the soul of the musical!!

[obsessedwithtlk]

𝟛𝟘 𝕪𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕤 𝕠𝕗 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕃𝕚𝕠𝕟 𝕂𝕚𝕟𝕘 🦁💛

The Lion King has been my favourite movie for as long as I can remember.

I don't recall the very first time I watched The Lion King because I was still chilling in the womb 30 years ago and I was just one month old when it came out on VHS but Disney movies were constantly playing in our house thanks to my siblings.

However, every time I hear the opening score, I'm instantly transported back to being four years old, sitting on the floor of our blue-themed living room, watching The Lion King. I vividly remember the moment when the mother and baby giraffe step into the sun.

Nostalgia is powerful!! The Circle of Life, with its expressive music, serves as a strong trigger for my childhood memories.

Honestly, I struggle to get through the intro without shedding a tear. a reminder of how formative experiences and powerful storytelling can impact our emotions throughout our lives and we're only 4 minutes in! Yet those 4 minutes feature some of the most beautiful and well-crafted animation and storytelling ever, in my opinion.

The story of Simba resonated with me deeply. I was particularly drawn to Simba’s journey of self-discovery and the lessons he learned about bravery, grief, and responsibility. I admired Mufasa's wisdom and strength, and I found Timon and Pumbaa's carefree attitude both funny and comforting.

The Lion King was probably one of my first major hyperfixations.

When I was around 8-10 years old, my nighttime routine involved watching The Lion King and Simba's Pride before bed every night, always remembering to rewind the VHS ready for the next day.

It was around this time, I first gained access to the Internet. One of the first things I searched for was The Lion King. I discovered lionking.org and its fanart sister site, realising that many others also loved this movie just as much as me.

I was too young to really communicate with anyone at the time, but I admired from afar, which made me feel less alone. When I discovered Tumblr many years later you bet I created my own Lion King fan page which is still up to this day for archiving and memory purposes.

If not for The Lion King, I wouldn't have made some lifelong international connections and friendships.

Whenever I felt down, lonely, anxious, or afraid, The Lion King was there to support me.

The Lion King taught me many lessons about life and death, the importance of facing one’s past.

This movie didn’t just entertain me; it also shaped me.

Most people see The Lion King as just a cartoon for kids, I view it as a work of art, showcasing the beauty of animation, music, and storytelling. Beyond the visuals, the story behind its creation is a testament to the power of passion, dedication, and hard work.

Initially, many at Disney underestimated the film, doubting its potential. Many top animators chose to work on Pocahontas, believing it would be superior. The Lion King was crafted by junior animators who believed in the project, and despite the, it became a beloved classic.

It remains a timeless movie that I will always cherish, not just for its beautiful animation and music, but for the profound impact it has had on my life.

The Lion King taught me that it's okay for things to change and to grow older. It showed me that ignoring your past will only hurt you in the long run and that it's better to address and learn from it rather than pretend it didn't happen.

Ultimately , The Lion King is about finding one's place in the world, something I'm still working on.

It's been an absolute pleasure to grow up alongside this beautiful movie.

[courtkossai]

think about concept of thought disorder again and ... maybe in some ways naive view , because of course these things can be troublesome , but ... 

in this case , talk about category about construction of thoughts , and language to express those thoughts , FTD . to go on apparently random tangents can be thought disorder , to say words for mouth feel or visual appearance rather than definition can be thought disorder , any train of thought or linguistic expression that is not " logical " to evaluator can be thought disorder . 

very much like ... there will be times that this is genuine struggle in and of self - to express pain or emergency , to call for help , so on . but think usually most significant part of struggle is stigma and general reaction . think this is part of where distress criteria can fall short - easier to attribute distress to this abnormal experience than actually admit to stigma and cruelty , even if experience in self is not inherently one of distress . 

hey , not hard to see here how kossai have different approach and expression of language . and people can be just so , so fucking much about this . even if try to explicitly outline boundaries , and where kossai will cut people off - not to ask curious questions of why , not to give compliments like easy or cute , not to give praise like pet who perform funny trick - people disrespect these . and this come from people who apparently want to respect , too , then bend over backwards to justify disrespect - that is what frustrate ! 

feel like can not write stories without have someone to look over , edit , and reform words correctly , so no one will complain . feel like have to be on edge and perfectly word explanations , not out of moral compulsion , but because someone will try and pick away if there is any slipup in words or ambiguity . and even at best polish without external help , honestly , some people still just ignore , even block out and deny space explicitly because of language . 

would not change how kossai approach and use language , even if could - problem is not kossai , but how others learn to devalue and react dismissively . and do sincerely think that is usually most significant distress , in any form of thought disorder - how people react like deviations in communication is personal attack , some kind of scary murderous intention , or just not say anything of worth in any capacity . 

think also fair to mention that no , none of this is exclusive to any one experience - under right conditions , anyone might be able to show these traits . there is not some fundamental separation between " healthy thoughts " and " sick thoughts " , rather traits exist on scales that can tip either way if given particular weights . anyone can be there , for number of reasons .

[broodsys]

monsters - their origins and roots in human psyche

warning: this post will contain discussion of racism, ableism, and fatphobia, not because i think any of these are "monstrous," but because they have been used as signifiers for monstrosity and this is an analysis of what human beings have/do define as "monsters" and why

some rough archetypal categories, which can of course overlap to varying degrees, but separated out here and defined below for ease:

the maligned

the mistreated

the othered

the unknown

the controlled

violence & fear

i don't think people are intentionally using these or any similar categories, so when i draw distinctions between them, they are distinctions within this conversation only. i'm just trying to analyze as many different manifestations of monsters/the monstrous as i can

the maligned

misunderstood, reviled, loathed, usually without cause. these are the monsters who look scary, "ugly", "disfigured", etc.

sometimes the maligned is presented as the maligned. and sometimes it is not, it is presented as the literally monstrous, but the way people may relate to it is as the maligned

sometimes it is a truly different, non-human entity. but sometimes - often, even - they are either human or non-human, but with distinctly human characteristics, many of which tie in with various forms of bigotry

disability, fatness, and features of PoC have all been used as signifiers that someone/something is monstrous, evil, etc. they have been used as a visual shorthand to imply a morality. also, creating an "ugly" being is often enough to have it labeled a monster

these narratives may be a deliberate analysis of these themes; they may be self-expressions from people with lived experience; or they may be - and i would say, most often are - the results of internalized and unexamined bigotry

the mistreated

these are the "monsters" who are abused, ostracized, exterminated needlessly. they are not doing any harm, or the only harm they do is in self-defense, but they are victims nonetheless, often the result of fear, hatred, or disgust

insects fall into this category with ease. kafka's metamorphosis. ender's game. also, frankly, real insects, who are killed for no more purpose than making the people who happen to witness them uncomfortable*

*don't argue with me about this. yes, i know about insects carrying disease. yes, i know about the risks they pose to human health. yes, i care about that. no, i am not talking about those instances

narratives can either suggest that these beings deserve this treatment, or that it is unfair. the mistreated can be a group or an individual. it can be defenseless or capable but still hunted

at the far end, something that, say, needs to eat humans in order to stay alive could be considered the edge of the mistreated. it is simply trying to pursue the continuation of its own life, as are we. but i think that would likely fall into other categories for the sake of this essay

the othered

sidelined, ostracized, ignored. you look away from these beings. they aren't really there. and if you see them, well, no you didn't/who cares

there is no one prime example that stands out to me - although some versions of ghosts may fall into this category - so what i will do here is instead point out that many people, from many and varied backgrounds and demographics, will have experienced a sense of othering which they may choose to explore through a monster

i know many neurodivergent and queer people who relate to monsters, because there was a time in which they (and i) felt othered, felt at the edges, felt inhuman. and, thus, monstrous

there are plenty of other groups who i can think of who would likely fit into this category... but i'm not going to speak for them, only to say that it is far from exclusive to queer and neurodivergent ppl

the unknown

this is the completely foreign, unknown, unknowable. the genuinely, literally alien. or the divine. the mysterious. the things so different you cannot actually process what you are seeing/perceiving. the sense of wrongness that suffuses everything

primordial forces. the entirety of the universe. black holes. like... the unknown as a (monster/monstrous force/monstrous entity) is vast

it can also include things that are Wrong versions of themselves. sometimes this is shown through clones or other versions of copies, through changelings (which has a history connected to neurodivergent children being perceived as wrong/unnatural children), etc.

mazes. caves. underwater. space. heaven or hell. it's just about how something is presented

the controlled

beings whose sole value is in what they are made to do, where any behavior outside of that narrow range is seen as deviant and punished, and their lives are often more or less forfeit if they do not perform as desired

robots are probably the most obvious example of this. but also things like test tube people (usually but not always children), deliberate mutations/forced changes in order to perform a function, etc.

the narratives around this, as is the case with all these, can vary wildly. but some may show the controlled as something that deserves or requires this control. or they may pay it no attention at all, simply allowing the assumption that its control is right to permeate the narrative. or the narrative may be about the controlled - it may be an incredibly sympathetic view of them

but this can tie into desires for control, desires for safe situations where nothing can react outside of specified parameters, or an analysis of what it is to be controlled, to be subject to another's desires, whims, or conditions. it can examine interpersonal dynamics as a transactional affair, where "right behavior" gets rewarded - with affection, with tolerance, with love, or perhaps just with the absence of punishment - and "wrong behavior" is demonized and punished, sometimes with death/destruction/a "reboot"

violence & fear

the entire concept of violence, from self-defense to righteous punishment to feral brutality, and it can come from either side, the monster or their victim(s)/"victim(s)". and the entire concept of fear. from the things that go bump in the night to the sense of being watched to seeing bright eyes in the gloom staring unwaveringly at you. whether they are violent or not, predatory or not, etc. changes with each narrative, but they are symbols of fear

this is what i think most people imagine when they think of monsters. vampires, werewolves, zombies, things like the kaiju in pacific rim, or godzilla, monsters who are often simply described as monsters

but it can also be a little more esoteric. contagion and plague, perhaps represented through a carrier, a "monstrous" typhoid mary figure. or a strong human emotion made tangible, physical, dangerous; grief, anger, betrayal, etc. as a physical force that haunts you, or haunts a place, or has leached into the area and twists it (think silent hill)

[bestworstcase]

thinking about those two deer in the lost fable again. out of all the assets created just for this one episode, why?

like… it’s not random. the only other animals in this story have been amber’s horse, zwei, and the branwens’ bird forms. all have some narrative relevance, a clear connection to a character that justifies the expense and effort of modeling them. and then in the lost fable—an episode that was always going to be a heavy lift technically and financially for the sheer amount of ground to cover and novel assets required—has these two deer. they’re only on screen for like two seconds.

it’s narratively motivated. the lost fable is a highly symbolic episode and that symbolism foreshadows the ever after / ascension / all the v9 lore quite strongly; it follows that the intended symbolism of this shot demanded the presence of these deer.

the god of light has deer antlers. in the blacksmith’s story, the first act of destruction is to eat; darkness eats, light does not. light holds himself at a distance, he designs, he does not live. these deer are grazing. salem appears from a plume of smoke at the base of the withered tree, and the deer startle at her approach and look up at her. the shot transitions to salem looking upon the grimm in the ruins of a town—

“she cursed the gods, she cursed the universe. she cursed everything—everything but herself,” says jinn. but her expression isn’t anger. (always check her eyebrows.) it’s more intense concentration, intense thought…

…which brings her back to the pool of grimm. jinn says that “fate” led her back here because that’s what ozpin believes. but this sequence begins with those deer, eating. destruction in its purest unadulterated form. salem visually emerges from the withered tree. she’s observing the grimm and she’s thinking. if the fountain of life had given her immortality, then surely the pools of grimm would finally take it away—not “finally let her die.”

rolls over.

the fountain of life gave her infinite life. salem hoped the pool of grimm would take it away. not kill. not destroy. infinite life. if you take from an infinite quantity, an infinite quantity still remains. this force of pure destruction could not destroy, so it created…

destruction first, to clear the wilderness away. darkness eats the tree’s brambles and through this act creation is born. jinn’s telling distorts through ozpin’s belief, but the truth is there. pure destruction and infinite life are not in conflict; rather, destruction feeds life.

the pool of grimm did take from her life—subtract from the infinite and the infinite remains—she’s torn apart and remade. creativity, to imagine what, and who, could replace the wilderness.

jinn tells this story, ozpin’s story, in a way that obfuscates salem’s real agency and her personhood, casting her alternately as tragic object of fate and inhuman monster. fate led her back to the land of darkness; a being of infinite life with a desire for pure destruction.

he believes salem wanted to die when she leapt into the pool of grimm.

did she?

the deer, the grimm, herself, the pool of grimm. wilderness and ruin. all that remained. i arrive at the edge of the world […] should i kneel?/what should i feel?/will i fall apart?/maybe that’s all i want […] and in my heart it’s there/standing tall enough to fix it all/it’s just a new beginning/it’s just a different ending […] i am everything and nothing/all at once/i’ll meet you at the horizon/where we first met/where i died, i’ll be born again…

(something. something. without you i am nothing, but because of you, i am everything. self-similar narrative.)

the edge of the world. . .

mutters. sow the death and reap the seed -> the moon will sadly watch the roses die -> a rose will grow to be a seed/from every life another leads -> some roses will never bloom. the burning rose, the shattered moon.

did. she know—did she have an idea that destroying herself would create a new world? destruction to clear the wilderness, creativity to imagine its replacement.

“they could claim the powers of their creators for themselves and in turn perfect their own design; all they needed to do was destroy their old masters.” -> “this was it, this had to be it, the brother’s grimm, the pools of black that continued to give rise to horrific nightmares” -> “we could be the gods of this world. […] create the paradise the old gods could not.”

like. it’s not just

it’s those fucking deer. eating. the grimm picking over the ruins. (grimm eat their prey.) salem, observing, thinking. “the gods had hoped that salem would learn from her eternal curse, and she did.” the god of light bade her learn the importance of life and death, and she did. and then she jumped into the pool of grimm and created remnant. a new world. a completely unfamiliar world–

…oh. ohhh

“magic was a gift from the gods that all could wield” -> “without the blessings of the gods, no one could perform magic like mankind was once capable of”

and

“aura is a manifestation of the soul, a life force that runs through every living creature on remnant.” we could be the gods of this world.

how does pyrrha unlock jaune’s aura? “for it is in passing we achieve immortality; through this we become a paragon of virtue and glory, infinite in distance and unbound by death. i release your soul, and by my shoulder protect thee.” a religious mantra echoing salem’s idea of transcendence. magic was a gift from the gods that all could wield; aura is a manifestation of the soul that everyone has, though only a select few are privileged by ozma’s institutions to learn. “with enough training and focus,” salem says, “a user’s aura can turn them into much more than just a man.” the illustration is ozpin’s silhouette—but ozma’s power isn’t derived from aura, it’s magic, and the infinite man is fond of saying that he is “only a man, not even a very good one,” and salem herself sees him as diminished, as lessened. he’s the image of “just a man.” a person’s aura can make them much more than ozma. much more than the brothers’ design.

our powers surpass all others.

salem is grimm. even if she has aura, she cannot use it to protect herself. the gods gave humans magic and then took it back; salem threw herself into the pool of grimm and it broke her apart and—symbolically if not literally—took away her aura and gave it to the people of remnant, reborn from the ashes of her rebellion. a semblance is the outward manifestation of one’s soul. she wanted humanity to claim the powers of their creators and perfect their own design, and… with enough training and focus, a user’s aura can turn them into something much more than just a man.

[gamesception]

Sception Reads Batgirl (2024) #1

writer: Tate Brombal artist: Takeshi Miyazawa colors: Mike Spicer

I guess the comics creation process has changed in the last 20 years, because there's no longer separately credited pencils and inks. Is inking just not a job anymore? If not, who does that part now? "artist" or "colors"? Lettering is still a separate job - Tom Napolitano for this issue. I haven't been listing letterers with these reviews... should I be? & should I be calling out editors, for that matter?

Just a heads up: I didn't dislike this issue overall, and I do call out the stuff I liked, but I spend a lot of this post comparing it negatively to Batgirl 2000. If you're a Cass fan who's just hyped that she has a new solo title, and don't want to read a bunch of negativity while you're still celebrating then maybe skip this one.

Anyway, Cassandra Cain finally has a proper new solo ongoing title as Batgirl again, and the Cass fans on tumblr have seemingly been pretty hype about it. I'm considerably more trepidatious going in, because my reread of Cass's original appearances (link) has mostly shown me that I'm maybe not so much a 'Cassandra Cain' fan as I am a fan specifically of the initial Puckett/Scott run of Batgirl (2000). Of the unique tone and story-telling style of those issues, of the particular relationships between Cass and her main supporting cast at the time - Bruce, David, Barbara, later Stephanie.

I recently wrote a too-long post about what I was hoping for out of the new book (link) - but to recap I DON'T want to see a return of OG Cass's character and continuity - that version of the character is too tied up in her particular relationships with other characters that either don't exist or don't exist in the same form anymore. Plus, the impulse of middle age comic creators to try to force continuity back to whatever the status quo was when they first became fans is exactly what led to original Cass getting tossed aside and trampled over in the first place. New Cass is a new character, and I don't want her fans to have to go through what I went through just because people my age are in charge of editorial now.

What I DO want is a return of original Cass's storytelling style. Self contained stories, sombre tone, focus on emotion over action, leaning into Cass's personal motivations and fraught interpersonal relationships (just those of new Cass instead of old Cass), with a heavy emphasis on the individual humanity of all parties involved, with story and emotions conveyed primarily through the art - especially the facial expressions - while minimizing the reliance on dialog and especially narration blocks wherever possible.

That's a tall order, especially the last bit. There's a reason Batgirl 2000 caught my attention and stuck in my head. It takes a special kind of artist to be able to convey all that visually, and a special kind of writer to understand that less is more, to trust the artist to convey these things and trust the reader to pick up on them without spelling it all out explicitly in text.

So that's all what I want. But what do I expect? I'm a old school Cass fan. What I expect is disappointment.

...............................

So, first two pages, and we have some positives and negatives right off the bat. The art & colors are good. I mostly like the way Miyazawa draws Cass. It's a solid take on her costume, even if I prefer the wider angle ears from the recent Birds of Prey run. I like the classic chonky yellow belt pouches, though I'm not as big a fan of the yellow outline bat symbol. Yes it's also a classic, but it's a bit fiddly and doesn't read terribly well when she's smaller in the panel, like on that second page, so I always though a solid yellow bat symbol would have been better. I like the white eyes.

Cass's proportions feel a bit off. I like the emphasis on her musculature, but the overall figure feels too hour glassy, and the head to body ratio kind of visually implies a much taller Cass that I'm used to, especially for her post-reboot incarnation. This is an issue in Birds of Prey as well, if maybe not to the same extent.

New Cass was apparently supposed to be 16 when she was first introduced in B&RE & her earlier Detective run and like 17 or 18 in later Detective, outsiders, and Batgirls appearances - through from the way she was drawn and depicted I had thought she was like three years younger than that the whole time. Now she's 18 or 19, and has apparently gone through an extremely late and extremely sudden puberty? Eh, continuity in Bat books especially regarding canon ages was never good and has been an absolute wreck ever since new 52, so that's not something to fault this book in particular for. But even so, the body type feels a bit off.

The big tragedy, is, of course, the way Cass's mask blocks her face - especially her mouth. This is another throwback to her original batgirl costume, but Damion Scott was still able to convey a full range of emotions on Cass by just ignoring physics and drawing her face straight through the mask. Miyazawa seems to be going for a slightly more... I don't know, 'realistic' maybe isn't the right word. And there is some expression still showing, but given how much more expressive Shiva's face manages to be in this issue, it really feels like breaking from tradition to go with something that keeps her face exposed, like the domino mask of the Blackbat costume, would have better served Miyazawa's style.

Speaking of Shiva...

Yup, that's post reboot Shiva there, looking basically exactly how I expect her to look. Which is to say she looks fine. Good even. Her face is very expressive throughout the comic, which I really like, and I also like that she's deliberately drawn a bit older - something about the lines on her face, the sharpness of it. This is a woman with a history, been around the world, killed a lot of people, and that experience shows on her face. This in particular I can credit Miyazawa above Scott on, because in their first few meetings in particular back in Batgirl 2000 Cass and her mom looked about the same age.

There's a deliberate choice in this first introduction to pose her away from Cass, despite the fact that in the narrative she's the one going to Cass and Cass is rejecting her. But while it doesn't fit the narrative, it does play into some of the underlying character dynamics between them. It ties into the idea that since she understands body language like Cass does, she can 'speak' that language deliberately, allowing her to deceive Cass in a way that normal people can't. Her interior emotions are closed off to Cass - not because Shiva isn't expressing emotions but because her ability to lie means Cass can't - and doesn't - trust what Shiva 'says'.

That's all good stuff. The kind of interpersonal dynamics that I want to see out of Cass stories, so in that at least I'm happy. Most of the Cass-Shiva stuff in this issue is really solid. It was a natural and imo correct choice to start the book with a narrow focus on Cass's relationship to Shiva, given how core that relationship has been to both of their characterizations since Cass's post-reboot reintroduction. But that's for both better and worse, especially in Shiva's case. I know there are fans of Shiva out there who don't like how much of her individual character and motivation has been pushed aside to just make her 'Cass's Mom'. Unfortunately, that particular problem isn't one that's going to be fixed in a Cass Cain solo title.

Less good is how much Brombal relies on blunt narration blocks to explain this dynamic between Cass and Shiva to the reader, instead of allowing the reader to pick up on the emotional undercurrent through the art the way Cass perceives it through body language.

I'm willing to cut Brombal some slack here, because where they're working with Shiva - a reserved, withdrawn, calculating, and emotionally deceptive evil parent - Puckett & Scott were working with og David Cain. He was original character they crafted specifically to fit the kind of story they were trying to tell, so they made Cain the kind of man that never had a sincere emotion that he didn't wear all over his face for the world to see. Like, here he is in Batman 567, Cass's first appearance, with the Puckett/Scott creative team.

look at this man

Look at his face! See how expressive it is!

And yeah, Shiva's just not going to be expressive in the same way. So it really is honestly impressive how good a job Miyazawa does with her face in this issue:

Those are some good & fun faces. It's a good thing Miyazawa is doing such a good job with Shiva's face, though because it's near about the only face we get to see in this issue. Which is a problem I pitch a big old fit about below regarding the antagonists, but even more than that it's kind of frustrating that we don't get to see Cass's face even one time in the first issue of her new ongoing.

And while these Shiva faces are good, they're rarely the focus of the page. We're never given the kind of close up faces that take up half a page or more to really let us drink in the characters' emotions like Batgirl 2000 used so effectively.

.....

That's about as much as I can wring out of those two pages. Unfortunately that means I have to get to the actual content of the book.

First, what the hell is Cass doing in that first panel.

Second... come on. This book wants me to believe that Shiva is worried about some random assassins killing her and Cassandra? In this continuity the League of Assassins are the worlds top evil ninja society that every other random evil ninja society is afraid of, except for the League of Shadows who are the super secret even more ultra evil ninja society that even the League of Assassins is afraid of, and Shiva and Cass are each individually established as being so far beyond even them that either of them could outfight and take down the entire League of Assassins on their own. "Faceless ninja mooks Trained killers are coming to get us" is so far beneath either of these characters as far as threats go that Shiva should feel insulted, not afraid.

And I guess that's supposed to be the point? Like the writer is saying "these guys who you've never heard of are so scarry that even Shiva is afraid! Aren't you intrigued?" And, like, no. I'm not. If Shiva isn't feeling disdainful and insulted, then I'm just kind of forced to feel insulted on her behalf. This isn't something Shiva should think Cass needs help with, and if Cass did end up needing help I'd expect Shiva to help, but also to make a big show of how disappointed she was that Cass couldn't handle it on her own the entire time.

That last panel with Cass and Shiva is cute. Again, most of the direct interactions between them in this book are good, and they're the ledge I'm desperately clinging to in order to say I don't actively dislike the whole issue altogether.

On the other hand when I say 'faceless ninja mooks' I mean it. These guys are as generic as mooks get, with no individuality at all. Store bought ninja halloween costumes, swords and bows instead of guns or anything serious. These guys aren't people, they're the putties from Power Rangers. They don't even have real dialog, just a corny mantra.

Compare to these generic thugs from Batgirl (2000) #1. Even without names and almost no dialog, each one is a completely unique individual, to the point that we easily recognize 'Merc' in the middle when he shows up later in the issue.

Mob guys, bank robbers, just random civilians on the city streets, everyone who shared a panel with Cass with under Scott's pencil had a unique face, and whenever any of these background characters stepped forward to actually take part in the story Puckett invested them with personalities and motivations and lives of their own.

And I'm not just harping on it because I like that kind of storytelling better, it was part and parcel to Cass as a character. Her unique superpower, her whole body-reading gimmick, essentially amounts to super-empathy. It's why she doesn't kill, it's why the one time she did kill as a child messed her up so bad. It, along with the guilt from that murder, forces her to connect to even the villains she interacts with, to see them as full human beings and not just enemies that need to be stopped. It's why Bruce once characterized her as 'gentle', despite all the killing skills that were trained into her. And yeah, new Cass is a new character, but these core elements are, or at least should be, shared between both versions, between every version of this character, even as the specific details of that history vary from continuity to continuity.

Emphasizing the individual humanity of all the characters in a Cass story - from Cass herself to the primary antagonists to the random mooks to the background extras - is essential to conveying that aspect of Cass as a character.

And these guys are the literal opposite of that.

Now, they're not all bad. We do get a bit of a fun fight scene out of them. Very 70s hong kong martial arts movie vibe, which Cass and Shiva can play into. And a faceless crowd of ninja mooks makes sense in that context. This isn't as fundamentally obviously a terrible decision on the creative team's part as I'm making out.

But there are any number of martial artist characters in the DC canon that can be used to do this sort of thing. IMO it just doesn't speak to what's uniquely compelling about Cassandra - old or new. Which is a problem for the first issue of her new ongoing title.

And nothing here illuminates why Shiva would be in any way worried about these guys. They're not uniquely skilled, they're not uniquely anything, and they're not portrayed as being on Cass or Shiva's level.

Cass and Shiva eventually get bored of fighting generic nobodies & make their way down to the street via window and hang-glider-cape, where we get this bit... that I actively kind of hate?

Because, see, the incident Shiva is talking about is something that happened in Batgirl (2000). This shouldn't be in continuity anymore, and it doesn't fit into current Cass timeline at all - unless there was some other shiva-worshipping temple in gotham death/revival incident with Cass post-reboot that I don't remember.

I've seen people celebrating this exact line as marking the return of pre-reboot Cass's continuity and the wholesale erasure of post-reboot Cass. Apart from the frustrating indifference of that sentiment towards any fans of post-reboot Cass, especially coming from fans who should know better, it doesn't even work. Because the Shiva we've spent this whole issue with is 100% post-reboot Shiva. This IS NOT the character that Cass fought in that temple. As out of character as it is for this Shiva to be afraid of random mooks, we can at least accept her behavior IF we suspend disbelief about those mooks representing any sort of threat to her and Cass in the first place.

But the Shiva og Cass fought in Batgirl (2000)?

Death matches, putting her own life on the line to test her skills against the deadliest martial artists in the world, was her whole deal. Batgirl (2000)'s contribution to that deal was that Shiva was such a skilled fighter because she had the same body-reading ability as Cass, and just like Cass that ability forced Shiva to experience the deaths of those she killed as they experienced it. And just like Cass had been consumed by guilt from that experience, Shiva had been consumed with... well, not guilt exactly. But a burden of karmic debt. She had killed and she deserved to die for it. But her martial pride didn't allow her to just take her own life, so she traveled the world looking for someone who could give her the warrior's death she deserved.

After Shiva "killed" and then revived Cass, she hoped that Cass would be, at least for a moment, sufficiently freed from the sense of guilt that prevented her from killing again to go all out against Shiva and finally put an end to her. Cass, recognizing how much they had in common, was then able to use her new understanding of the death wish they shared to defeat Shiva without killing her.

All this is to say that if the Shiva Cass fought in that temple had been confronted with an ancient secret order of martial artists out to kill her and so skilled that they could actually do it, she would have relished the chance to finally meet the end she had been chasing across the world for decades. This Shiva is not her, so the comic deliberately invoking that story via this temple reference is kind of jarring to me.

This is part of why I didn't want this book to try to revive pre-reboot Cass's history, whether in part or in whole. That character was founded on relationships with a bunch of other characters whose present versions are all as different from the versions og Cassandra knew as the Cass of Batman & Robin Eternal was from the Cass of Batgirl (2000).

The clock only turns the one way. You can't turn it back, you have to build forward from where you are.

If we ignore this line, and the inclusion of this temple in the story, then I'd argue the comic at least begins to do that with the relationship Cass and Shiva's have built up in Detective and Outsiders and Shiva's brief appearance in Batgirls... but are any of those events even in continuity anymore? I don't know, and that's pretty frustrating.

We do get this cute moment of Cass disappearing on Shiva and Shiva blaming 'her father's influence' - by which she obviously means Bruce. Again, mostly good character interaction between Cass and Shiva. Unfortunately this cute moment is immediately undercut by Cass just being there anyway in the next panel, but still.

....

I'm getting tired, and this has taken way too long already, what's left?

Yeah, Shiva's temple explodes, Cass & Shiva go there and meet the temple keeper from the same story back in Batgirl (2000) as he dies, the faceless ninjas attack again. There's at least one more really good bit with Cass and Shiva worth calling out:

This is good. This is a good moment, calling back to the start of the issue when Shiva was trying to convince Cassandra how much she she meant her, and Cass accused her of lying, while here she is trying to convince the putty patrol that Cass doesn't mean anything to her, and Cass can tell that that's the real lie.

This is probably my favorite Cass & Shiva bit in an issue that has a lot of good bits to point to in that regard.

Unfortunately the comic pretty much ends here, which brings me to my last big complaint about Batgirl (2024) #1: It doesn't tell a complete story. It doesn't even come close - hardly anything even happens. Cass & Shiva barely talk in a pent house, fight some random nobodies for a few panels, barely talk outside, and then end on a cliff hanger fighting the same nobodies in a burning building. That's it. We barely recap Cass's backstory at all, we don't find out who these guys are or why they want Cass & Shiva dead, we hardly interact with any characters, and they end on a cliffhanger after hardly doing anything only 20 pages in, wasting like 6 pages on an adds for wrestling comics after that.

Batgirl (2000) #1 managed to do so much more with only a few more pages - giving us flashbacks to Cass as a child beating up 'Merc' & the thugs as part of training with David, training with barbara, Barbara trying and failing to connect with her, another flashback to cass after she had left david encountering Merc again, patrolling with batman, barbara and bruce talking about her abilities and disabilities, the little wham moment of Babs being like 'No wonder she's so good at stick fighting, I just thought it was from Cain training her', and Brucy replying 'Cain never taught her stick fighting, I did, last week, took five minutes', Bruce & Cass sparring - which the comic doesn't even show because the page space was better used on close ups of their faces to convey their emotions afterwards, Cass patrolling again and starting to find herself as batgirl when she meets Merc for a third and final time, how that final meeting tied the rest of the issue together in a satisfying way, tying together the drifting life that led to her becoming Batgirl, before closing on Batman laying down the rules for Cass as a crimefighter (no costumed criminals, etc) which also served as a message to readers about what to expect from the book.

....

I get that it's not fair to compare this book to the Puckett/Scott run of Batgirl 2000, one of my favorite comic book works and probably my absolute favorite mainstream superhero comic work ever. I will stick with this book and post my reactions to it going forward, but I don't intend to do this kind of expectations-laden comparison to Batgirl 2000 again. I hadn't even intended to do it this time, except that while I was working on this post I kept seeing "Cass is so back!" style reactions from old school Cass fans at the kind of sort of maybe restoration of an unspecified amount of her pre-reboot continuity, and that's just frustrating to me.

Because to me what made og Cass special wasn't a fan-wiki style breakdown of her lore, it was the way her stories were told, and how that storytelling style brought the characters and relationships in it to life. Batgirl 2024 #1 isn't a bad book at all. In terms of modern Cass appearances, so far I like more than B&RE or Outsiders or Birds of Prey, but a bit less than Detective or Batgirls or Spirit world - though there's plenty of room for Batgirl 2024 to surpass those books in my estimation going forward.

But one thing it absolutely isn't is the second coming of Batgirl 2000.

[titstraction]

Can I send 7 of those ask game emojis? I'm gonna do it

✅ 💕 🎀 🌅 🤔 ⛔ 🔥

Ohh hi thank you for the questions!! Game on 😎😎

✅ list one or two favorite lines you’ve written and explain why they’re your favorite

Oooof this is a hard one!! I had to rack my brain for a while.

I love this section in dreamers:

“Sirius writes slowly, takes his time to decide the right word and only taints paper when he is sure. Reads five words back each time he manages a word forward.

Their eyes meet when Remus looks up from across the table. He is writing a book, and you can see it, bedtime stories beneath his dark iris. He smiles tenderly at him.

Dreams, Sirius writes down.”

Why well I ate with this. There’s theme and character analysis there’s gay yearning there’s Remus’s soulful eyes. I think it’s a very vivid scene, like it’s very visual and has a pulse. It’s also sexyyyy. I think it goes very well with this other section from dreamers:

“Since they first had sex, Remus seamlessly weaves into his writing as an antithesis, a crystalline stream of singing water where there is remorse sucking him dry, a wide expanse of forest where there are concrete walls enclosing him in a small space, dreams where there are holes in his memories.

Sometimes he reads them aloud, when they’re alone and warm in bed, and he figures Remus understands it because he kisses him in a way that’s just impossible -“

Likeeeeeee call the cops on me and put me up in jail cause why is this so heartbreaking and homosexual. But yaaa I think this second section reads pretty and it builds on the theme of remus as dreams and poetry and freedom and beauty and I love !!! how much life r breathes into s in this little story. Dreamers is the people’s princess fr.

💕 whats your favorite part of your writing process?

Daydreaming about putting my blorbos in situations is elite. I love the little eureka moment when I have a good idea! Had a good one for my wip the prophecy yesterday and have been riding that high since.

🎀 how do you decide when something is done?

I write very very chronologically meaning I only write scene 2 when scene 1 is done, and I like to publish chapters as I go. So a story is done when I write the final scene. Not really a big editor, if there’s typos it goes with typos mwah. As for a scene hmm it feels done when I read and I go alright chaps thats it for today.

🌅 do you typically known the ending to something before you start writing it?

Hmm I think it differs from fic to fic. Generally for my longer ones I have an ideia of where its going theme/ takehome message wise, and then how we get there/ how it unravels I usually work out halfway. But it really differs like for blue I knew pretty well how it was gonna go from the jump but for abyss I was just along for the ride.

🤔 why do you write fic?

What else is a mentally ill gay to do in this day and age!!

I always liked writing - as a kid I had the imagination and the social ineptitude and the pretentiousness and the reading habit to write well enough and be encouraged by adults around me. As I entered internet spaces and fan culture I fell in love with reading fanfic - still one of my favorite things to do and art form to engage with. So I suppose I write because its the creative expression that comes easiest to me, that I know how to do/ have ideas for, that I feel the most confident doing. Also sometimes I’m sad and bored and lonely and it’s nice to put all these daydreams and dialogues and desires somewhere. It’s wonderful that others want to read them and leave nice kind words - some comments have given me such profound joy?? So I also do it for the community of it. People are out there being SERIAL sweetie pies!! I also think it’s a good skill to work on and hone, I’m proud of somethings I have written (see above) and I believe I’ll write real great stuff when I’m a “real” adult heh!!

⛔️ whats something you try to avoid in your work?

Excessively morose and whiny and self-hating internal monologue — these bitches can be insecure and traumatized but get a grip! I think it’s much more interesting when characters want something but they unconsciously self-sabotage or it doesn’t work out or wtv than when characters don’t want it from the start because they don’t think they deserve it. Like I really fw that quote “there's a lot of narcissism in self-hatred” and it puts me off when I’m reading something and everything/ the whole romantic conflict is about how much the character hates themselves.

Obv they are deeply traumatized characters but I think it’s important to have room to be sexy fun and flirty!! In my writing whenever it gets too dark I make them fuck<33

🔥 what’s something that’s currently going really well?

Hmmmm I haven’t written in a hot minute BUT I got a really good comment from someone who said they’re reading all my works now which I love!!!!! I love finding a new writer with several fics from the same blorbos and it’s really cool to be that for someone else 😎😎

[mujahidrehmanseo]

The Transformative Power of Photography Mentorship in Creative Development

Aspiring photographers frequently find it difficult to hone their craft, find their unique voice, and deal with the intricacies of the visual arts field. To develop skills, photography mentorship has become essential. It offers aspiring photographers career advice, technical knowledge, and important assistance.

The Essence of Photography Mentorship

Learning technical abilities is only one aspect of photography mentorship; it also involves developing professional skills and creative vision. A mentor acts as a reliable advisor, assisting mentees in honing their technical skills and inspiring them to consider their viewpoints. Mentors are crucial in releasing creative potential because they provide practical learning opportunities, constructive criticism, and industry insights.

Mentors in photography provide mentees with access to industry networks, personal assistance, and expert expertise. In addition to helping mentees improve their skills, the mentor-mentee relationship gives them the courage to try their hand at storytelling and artistic expression. Through organised instruction, photographers hone their conceptual approaches, compositional strategies, and post-processing abilities, laying a solid basis for their future employment.

The Benefits of Photography Mentorship

For those wishing to make the move from amateur to professional, photography mentorship offers several benefits. One of the biggest advantages is that you can get individualised feedback. Mentorship provides individualised feedback that identifies growth opportunities, in contrast to generic internet lessons, assisting mentees in effectively honing their profession.

A greater comprehension of technical aspects like lighting, exposure, and post-production is also fostered by photography mentorship. Mentors fill this knowledge gap by using direct, practical teaching techniques. Many prospective photographers find it difficult to learn how to use manual settings and professional editing tools.

Mentoring improves knowledge of the sector in addition to technical skills. Professional photography requires an understanding of marketing tactics, portfolio creation, and client expectations. Mentoring in photography gives mentees the business savvy they need to succeed in cutthroat markets while avoiding typical errors.

Navigating Challenges in Photography Mentorship

Photography mentorship has its own set of difficulties in addition to its many rewards. Locating the ideal tutor is among the most frequent problems. Not all seasoned photographers are good teachers, therefore mentees need to look for mentors who share their learning preferences and artistic vision. For mentoring to be effective and motivating, the mentor and mentee must get along.

The Future of Photography Mentorship

Photography mentorship has been transformed by the digital age, making it more widely available than ever before. Aspiring photographers can now connect with professionals in the field across the world through interactive learning platforms, virtual workshops, and online mentorship programs. The conventional one-on-one mentoring strategy is changing into a hybrid one that blends individualised coaching with digital accessibility.

The future of photography mentorship is also becoming more accessible, accepting photographers with a range of backgrounds and abilities. Mentorship will continue to influence the upcoming generation of visual storytellers by cultivating a culture of cooperation and knowledge exchange, guaranteeing that talent is developed and possibilities are increased.

Conclusion

Aspiring photographers become self-assured, accomplished, and creative visual artists thanks to photography mentorship, which has a dramatic effect on their creative growth. Whether it takes the form of practical instruction, career counselling, or creative inspiration, mentoring is still an amazingly effective way to become an expert in an area.

Photography mentorship is a crucial investment in the artistic and professional journey of photographers who want to advance.

[centrally-unplanned]

I recently re-read Lost at Sea, the first truly-published work of Bryan Lee O’Malley (author of Scott Pilgrim), which is one of my favourite short-form comics. It's a re-read inspired by all my FLCL work; I commented before about the ways in which our main girl Raleigh is a distaff-Mamimi. I definitely still see it; she is what I am now referring to as a “Sadamoto Poet Girl”, those people who express their feelings in waves of metaphors they never truly clarify:

It helps that Raleigh is a teenager; it makes sure that any risk she might have of becoming pretentious is buried by how pathetically lost she is. She also may not be rocking any of the emo drip of the time but she has full depression vibes where it counts:

That mask you're wearing is bleeding black from overuse, frikkin hardcore Raleigh. This is definitely a teen angst book but I am highlighting the peaks here, a bunch of its silly chatter with her new roadtrip friends. She isn’t haughtily looking down on a world she knows is useless; she just has no clue, yet, how to make it useful. A key trait for the Sadamoto Poet Girl; their ambiguity of expression is how they cope with the ambiguity of how to relate to their own existence.

Which I think is what makes them work, both for me and in general; the actual ‘plot’ of Lost at Sea is that Raleigh has just meet up with her online older boyfriend for the first time, it went amazingly, and then he (probably) broke up with her and she has no clue how to deal. That is very concrete, and could be very basic - but by making the entirety of Raleigh’s emotional spectrum abstract and confused, the singular plot event becomes a drop in the ocean of her generalized ennui. This is a short story, and to make an impact it needs to be efficient in its expression. Abstraction is, ironically, very good at that; with no singular concrete meaning an abstract idea can hold a dozen simultaneously. Raleigh feels very real in a few short pages due to how much ground her in-her-head narration covers, without it being didactic.

Beyond being a proto-Mamami, though, what I was struck by was how similar she is to another Ash-favourite: Mara from Perfect Tides, a visual novel by webcomic artist turned game developer Meredith Gran (that, coincidentally, Bryan Lee O’Malley playtested as they are comic-artist friends). To start, how terminally online Raleigh is did not sink in for me the first time reading this, which is Mara’s defining trait in Perfect Tides; it's not as big in Lost at Sea, but her estrangement from her physical reality due to the superiority of the virtual is readily apparent. There are these two scenes in both stories that hit directly on that beat (“this place” being their writing forum in PT):

They share other traits too - both of them, being women online in the 2000’s, are fiction writers, and being fiction writing alt girls they both live incredibly in their own heads. I have talked already about how Raleigh does that; Mara has this great way of having an idealized version of *everything* that could be that she constantly holds reality up to. There is this moment in PT where Mara smokes a cigarette for the first time, and is shocked to find it is not an effortless habit:

The author in her playthrough cackles during this scene, and describes it as “some real foreshadowing”, and it absolutely is - Mara can never glimpse reality cleanly because her abstractions about reality constantly interfere. Raleigh is more self-aware, but equally cursed by her own hallucinations.

They also just cannot handle the few moments they break through their walls of awkwardness and socially “succeed”:

Mara hilariously abandons the entirety of her emo identity and thinks she has finally Found Her Tribe until the next time some inanity triggers her spiraling self-doubt, while Raleigh is mature enough to know it's not gonna last; but they both experience the same assault from the idea of social acceptance. They are both downstream of their anxieties, if that makes sense - they build castles of rationalizations in their heads in order to defend against the emotions that beset them from elsewhere. Its why the “poet girl” vibes work - they are (generally desperate) attempts at self-understanding as much as self-expression.

I enjoy typologies, and all of this is me saying that within these characters I see a type, and I see causal linkages to the context of said type. The way a girl in the 2000’s would build an identity out of forum posts and metaphors, because society ~sucks~ but she can build an alternative online, in writing, in her head, a place for the alts and weirdos. But the very limitations that attracted those weirdos in the first place also snap back to prevent that new world from being a full substitute. Reality always wins. That identity exists today, for sure, but there is something of the time and place, of the era, that cohered this identity with a specificity I see in stories (or even people) that capture it. It's structural, and the structure has changed. In things like FLCL I see it, but you see the differences too - how the structures of Japan & the US (and Canada, Raleigh represent) intersect and how they don’t. My kind of gap moe, I guess.

Though, side note: something Raleigh and Mara do not share is that Raleigh, typical for an alt-indie 2000’s teen girl protagonist, is effortlessly pretty:

I will credit the comic, ‘effortlessly’ is overselling it - another of the petty normalities that breaks through her emo shell is how she has favorite dresses and brought them to look hot for her boyfriend. Still, the 2000’s era reeks through here; audiences wanted hot leads, even indie audiences. Mara meanwhile is a full 2020’s girl in her squat, pallid normality; the relatability privileged over the aspirational. Her story may take place in the year 2000, but it's still written for today.

[kliunkii]

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. specific memories / personal lost media ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.

❀episode 2 - goanimate❀

prepare your assets cuz im about to write a whole ass book about this subject.

i could not tell you the exact date when i started using goanimate, but it's in the 2013-2014 bracket. my first videos were kinda shit and not very interesting and they dont even exist in my mind anymore. ( i was like 10 years old at the time ). but i made so so so so soooooooooo many videos... it was a weird form of self-expression for myself, i could make jokes and characters that only i would find funny. i was very much autistic and i saw what sort of content other goanimators made at the time and i was impacted by that type of humour + youtube poop's were also still popular + mlg videos were at it's prime + loud=funny type of comedy was funny. so plenty of my videos were just incoherent randomxd humour with very loud noises and visuals.

buy at some point between 2014-2016(?) i started showing the videos i made to my cousin and he found them funny. i was so motivated to create more funny videos just to impress him and make him/us laugh. i mainly used the "chibi" and "stickman" animation style to make episodes about me and him partaking in slice-of-life/sitcom scenarios or even adventures. i used the polish text-to-speech function and had to write down subtitles for each line because the tts was so hard to understand xddd the characters spoke in lithuanian and it resulted in a very funny "accent".

i swear to god i made so many episodes with so many different inside jokes and plots that i can barely remember anything. at some point, later on in 2015/2016 ( istg i cant even remember anymore ) i found out that goanimate had the option to upload your own images to the video editor and that made me go crazyyyyyyy. i started making PNG's of real life pictures of me and my cousin + other people i knew irl. i also started recording actual voice lines with my shitty speaker/microphone aparatus and it made everything so much more authentic. i remember not knowing how to download and upload mp4's at the time, so i would turn on the recorder and put my microphone up to the speaker and play music/meme soundclips on youtube xddddd

not gonna lie i got so good at editing on that site... i knew so many different animation techniques and did so many layers of stuff xD it was honestly such a joy, everyday i would make an episode or two and would write my cousin ( who lived in the same apartment as me, but on the first floor ) to come over to my house and we would watch the video i just made scooched together by the desktop. its such a sweet memory for me because this is something that i experienced exclusively with my cousin and noone else ( and i was kind of terrified of anyone finding out about these videos because i was lowkey making fun of REAL LIFE PEOPLE i knew in REAL LIFE and used REAL LIFE PNG IMAGES OF THEM in the videos which is very stupid but i was a literal stupid child so i didn't know any better xddddd ). this is a very nostalgic topic for me because i've kind of lost contact with my cousin since 2018 and we basically dont even talk anymore, but im not sad or bitter about it, because we have grown up into adults and have moved on, but he was my very best friend and i'll always love him for that /p

the thing that i AM bitter about is the fact that every single one of those videos that i made are now lost media. gone forever. untracable. because at some point in 2017/2018 my account just fucking died.

you see, i kinda somehow broke the subscribtion system? as far as i know, goanimate had a "free trial" whenever you made a new account, for 14 days i think. and i don't know how i managed this, but i made an account in 2013(?) and my account just bugged and let me make videos forever xDDDDD just one big problem... due to the bug i was allowed to only make 2 minute videos, if it went over 2 minutes, then the videos wouldn't save. so i had so make very fast-paced episodes with continuations :ddddd

there was always a big red wall of text above my videos saying something along the lines of "this account will be shut down in __ days, so buy a membership", but it never happened so i just thought that i got lucky and my account got bugged xd

but TOO BAD, at some point in 2017? my account just got shut down. the whole thing. gone. forever. no way to retrieve it. along with every single one of my videos. i remember having like 20 pages of videos :)))))

and then, as we all know, goanimate as a whole shut down in 2019. but even if the website is archived on the wayback machine or whatever, there is no chance to ever see my videos again, because i remember privating account near the end of my account's deletion.

there are no reuploads anywhere, but i do remember recording 1 episode with my phone and sending it to a friend on messenger in 2017/2018? but yeah good luck finding that, especially since THAT messenger account has been deleted as well xD

i remember the moment i realised that everything was gone and i was so sad. i made new accounts to use the free trials for, but it just wasn't the same, i was starting to become a teenager and it felt embarrassing to do any of that silly shit anymore. and the videos would just disappear later on anyways.

bro the things i would do to watch my entire collection of videos for one last time..... i would pay big money.... ( no i wouldnt but i would... maybe i would maybe........ )

it's such a staple of how my humor evolved with time and just such a big part of my childhood.

now the next thing i want to talk about is the current/modern goanimate community, which, FIRST OF ALL, confuses me very much - how the fuck are yall using goanimate??? isnt the site?? fuckin dead??? how are yall making videos on it??? is there like a downloadable rewritten version somewhere online???? i doubt ill get an answer so let's just say that im questioning the powers above.

theres a lot of jokes and a whole ass community of people who ironically enjoy watching those "grounded" videos ( me included ). Deadwingdork and his community would refer to this phenomenon as "u s e r s" and im rlly fascinated by it. And theres always the question of "wtf is wrong with these people and why do they keep making the exact same video all the time just with slightly different characters", and the answer to that is kinda boring and expected, but it's just autism xD

i would even say that i was a part of that community back when i started making goanimate videos, i was intrigued by the "repetition" of it all, the comforting way i could foresee what will happen in the videos is a thing that alot of autists can relate to. and now, as a 21 year old, it is so surreal seeing children still making goanimate videos to this day, like i used to, and seeing how much people laugh at them or find them ironically entertaining ( again, i am one of those people ). and it makes me think of how the internet would've reacted to my goanimate videos if they were ever publicized xddd. i genuinely find these videos cute, its just autistic people finding comfort in repetition. ofc its weird when the videos turn into PUNISHMENT COMPILATIONS where Caillou gets his peenur cut off, but thats just part of what makes it so bizzare and hilarious.

i love seeing and only now realising why goanimate/vyond/whatever tf its called now is so popular between neurodivergent people, because i was interested in this media before i ever even considered being one of them.

[ivy-kissobryos]

#OcculTea - A Reflection on Social Media and the Occult

A few days back, I came across a post by @ella.harrison, @the.redheaedwitch and @polish.folk.witch on Instagram which invites individuals within the occult community to participate in a dialogue around the topic of social media in relation to one’s occult practice. Several questions were raised as prompts, and I would like to — as a form of self-reflection, and to participate in the discussion — write a short post in response to some of these prompts.

Before I begin, a quick introduction for those who may be new to my blog and unfamiliar with me: I go by the name of Ivy Senna online. My practice is varied, and I share bits and pieces of my practice occasionally online, mostly to do with rituals I have done (witchcraft rites, adaptations of the Greek Magical Papyri, folk charms etc) or sharing photos of my astrolatry practice. I am a published author in the occult sphere, with my writings having been published by Hadean Press and Revelore Press and other places throughout the last two years. Still, my online presence is relatively small and I would not consider myself to be an ‘influencer’ or anything of that sort. 

I am choosing to share it on my Tumblr rather than on my Wordpress blog (uponthealtar.com) due to the more informal nature of the discussion, and I will be focusing on my experiences with Instagram as that is my main social media platform nowadays.

What is my personal reasoning behind sharing my practice online?

I first began posting on Instagram in 2020. It started as a fun way to record my work, to make visual notes of my thoughts and discoveries. Then, it became a form of self-expression: ritual photography, in the right context, is something I find to be genuinely fun and beautiful. In time, Instagram became a way to promote my Wordpress blog. After I became officially published at various different places, social media became a way to promote those pieces of writing as well. Now, it is an amalgamation of a promotional tool, a place for me to post ‘cool’ photos in an artistic manner, to share bits and pieces of myself and my practice, and to keep in touch with friends and interact with my readers alike.

What am I looking to achieve by participating? Do I seek to educate, learn or connect?

I believe there are two reasons why I, as a writer, began writing. First, is because writing keeps me sane: it is my source of escapism, of the nutrition of the heart and soul, writing being the thing that replenishes me and shelters me both. Second, is because I have something to say. Sometimes I may have some thoughts on a particular god or star or piece of folklore, thoughts that I want to share, to know that I am not alone in my experiences. Sometimes it is the love for my gods and spirits that makes me want to share something about them to the wider world who may not know certain sides of them. Sometimes it is the irritation at seeing misinformation that makes me want to spread accurate information as a form of pushback. Sometimes it is the rage at realizing that — within this English-speaking social space — the discussions regarding my local folklore and practices has been dominated by voices from outside the local culture, voices of those who are arguably misrepresenting or fetishizing the things I hold dear.

So yes, I create content as a way to both connect and educate.

Consuming social media content, on the other hand, is partially how I learn. I say partially because although there have been great tips and tricks that I have gathered via Instagram posts and reels, I find that most of my knowledge and skill comes instead from experimentation, from hard-earned experiences, from autodidactic learning via courses and grimoires, much of these being guided by my spirits. In this case, it can be said that I do use social media to connect myself with those whom I can learn from. Yet, time and time again genuine friendship has arised from these social media encounters. Many of these bonds of companionship and care have come to mean a lot to me.

How do I think social platforms such as TikTok, Instagram and YouTube have each impacted education/sharing information?

I do not use TikTok nor do I engage with occult YouTube (much of my YouTube followings are simply food channels or video game channels), I will refrain from commenting on those platforms. But, one thing I notice about Instagram, is how things such as ‘reels’ tend to be prioritized by the algorithm over photos and mundane posts. And, as reels can only be a few minutes long at most, I believe that there is a danger that it may lead to an oversimplification of complex magical concepts. There may be a risk of people preferring things that are fast, easily digestible, and visually engaging to look at— when many times witchcraft is anything but palatable. This perhaps is why I very much prefer blogs, or podcasts, or anything long-form where nuances can be explored.

However, this is not a criticism though of those who post reels in order to advertise their occult businesses. People have to make ends meet, to put food on the table. What I am criticizing instead is the very structure of capitalism and consumerism that is promoted by platforms such as Instagram.

Out of what I share on social media, how much of it is staged vs reality?

All the photos I post of the devotional rites I perform are real. I am not one to simply just stage something without actually going through with the offerings or the prayers. However, there is a degree of things being ‘staged’ in the sense that sometimes I do move things around to make sure the lighting looks good, or I edit things in post-production to make the colors more aesthetically pleasing. More than that, when it comes to ritual, certain things are intentionally hidden out of frame. For example, I may show the front of an object but hide its back because it is there that I have inscribed specific names or petitions behind it. It must be known too that not all of the rites I do look as pretty as the things I post. Hence, it is less of a question of how much of what I share is real, but more of a question of how much of what I do goes unshared.

Do I think there is an element of censorship in online spaces? How do I decipher what is ‘appropriate’ to share online versus what to keep privately?

Of course there is censorship among online occult spaces— the very word ‘occult’ or ‘occulted’ means to be hidden. To think otherwise is foolishness, and if someone claims they are sharing everything they practice online then I wonder how much of their practice is actually genuine.

If I choose to not share something, there are usually two reasons: practicality and privacy.

In terms of practicality, it’s just the basic truth of how I am not in the habit of snapping photos if I am outside doing rituals at 3am alone in an abandoned area of my city. It’s dangerous enough being alone in such a situation; there is no way I’m going to wave my iPhone around to lure in muggers and thieves. Likewise, much of my ritual requires me to be in a trance-state. Even if something amazing happens during the ritual, I am not about to break the state of flow I am in just to take an aesthetic photo for social media. 

In terms of privacy, some things are just too personal to share. For example, I do not share photos of the weekly offering rituals I do for my spirit court. No one, aside from my closest friends, have even seen my ancestral altar or the full extent of my current working altar either. Even then, there are times when I would blur out things or crop out things before sending photos to those whom I trust— not because I don’t trust them, but because I respect the privacy of my spirit. Witchcraft is inseparable from spirit work, and my spirits deserve their privacy because some things are meant for their eyes and mine only. There are things I don’t write about nor post about. Secrecy is a part of witchcraft, and there are cases where power shared is power lost. A witch, in my opinion, should know how to keep their sharpest blade hidden and their trump card close to their chest. 

Additionally, many rituals are just too much to be shared, for a lack of a better word. There are times when I am naked, crawling on all fours, smearing my menstrual blood onto ritual objects. There are times when I work myself up into a frenzy, where I am crying and shouting, ritualistically making use of the tears running down my face and the emotional turmoil within my heart. In other words, there are moments which are just too intimate and vulnerable to be shared. 

Other reasons are more selfish: there are things I fear being misconstrued if I do share them. I do not want the things I hold dear to be misappropriated by people who don’t understand what they are doing.

How does one maintain the balance of authenticity and content creation?

By touching grass.

I jest, but sometimes you really do have to log off and be with yourself.

It’s easy to lose yourself in the online world, especially if a lot of your friends are online too. But, spending time with your spirits — in the dirt, under the stars, among the waters — is a good way to remind yourself of what your practice actually consists of and why you are doing all of this. Content creation is an extra thing, not the core of what you do. Another rule I have is that I don’t post something unless there is truth in it. I will never claim to do a ritual I did not actually do. If something is UPG or inspired by the works of others, then I cite and declare that. I will never claim that something is mine when it is not mine.

It is true though that there is a degree of performativity on social media: we only show our best selves here, rarely our vulnerabilities. For me, it is important for me to remind myself that all the people I look up to — on social media and in real life — eat and shit and have sick days and days when they just feel like doing nothing too. They edit themselves online and so do I. We all do, to a degree. After all, no one needs to know the nights when we stay up late questioning our sanity or having a mental breakdown over feelings of shame or inadequacy.

Everyone lies, yet to remain authentic is to be true to our heart, to acknowledge that we are both the mask and the performer wearing the mask.

How can we help each other in removing the external peer pressure and grow in community?

Everyone does something stupid every once in a while. We all fuck up from time to time— so why not share that?

I understand though that it is harder said than done, for consequences of occult mishaps can be emotionally painful and sometimes severe enough to derail one’s life. Yet, all of this reminds me of recent discussions in academia, of how the pressure to produce results of experimental success has contributed to how people may feel like they have no choice but to exaggerate results or, in the worst case scenario, falsify their findings. It is similar in the occult scene: we praise those who have seemingly amazing successes in their magic, not seeing the time and effort that went into perfecting their crafts, the countless occasions where they have failed before they succeed.

I think we should be open to discussing when spirit pacts don’t work out, when a relationship with a god isn’t what you thought it would be, when a magic ritual ended up having unintended consequences et cetera. I think we should be more open about the pain and heartache that comes with witchcraft, how terrifying and lonely and maddening it can feel sometimes, how sometimes you may feel lost in a fallow period where you feel out of touch with your gods and spirits.

All of this to say, I think we should normalize failure and being less than perfect.