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eddiexmunsonlover · 1 year ago

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One Step Away From You (Chapter 7)

BSF!Eddie Munson x PlusSize!Fem!Reader

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Chapter Summary: You spend some much needed one-on-one time with Max, and celebrate Halloween with the Party. WC: 5.8k Warnings: MDNI as always. Explicit language. Talks about death, grief, trauma, depression, guilt, all the fun stuff. Brief run in with Jason and his lackies. Total idiots in love, mutual pining fest in here. We're helping Max heal this chapter <3 Sorry for the delay in getting this chapter out, life has been lifing but I hope y'all enjoy it! I had fun writing this one. Taglist: @eddie-is-a-god @siriusmaraudeers

Friday, October 25th, 1985

The cool October night breeze caresses your skin as you step out the doors of Hawkins High, the excited chatter of the club members following behind you. When you hear quick steps approaching behind you, you turn to see Eddie fall in step next to you.

“So remind me again why you’re bailing on me for our only just recently reinstated Friday movie nights?” he questions, feigning offense. You scoff out a small laugh as you dig for your keys in your bag, approaching your truck parked next to his van.

“Because I already told you, I’m taking Max out to the drive-in.”

“Oh yeah, what movie are you gonna see?”

“They’re playing Silver Bullet tonight.”

“Oh man. Yeah, I’ve heard about that one. Looks really good, I’ve been really wanting to see it.” He leans against his van, putting on the dramatics and fake disappointment that you see right through, unable to stop the big smile from creeping onto your face as you watch his little show.

“Oh is that so?” you tease, popping out your hip as you cross your arms, amusement written across your face.

“Come on. What, you think I’m gonna dampen your girl party?”

You roll your eyes.

“Under any other circumstances, I’d insist you join along. But Max… she’s already been isolating herself enough as it is, anyone else being there would just close her walls right back up, you know? And I’m trying to bring those walls down so…”

“Yeah, I get it. I’m only teasing. I hope you guys have a good time. Tell me if the movie's any good, yeah?” He offers you a soft smile, a smile you return that quickly turns into a smirk as you watch the younger boys approaching.

“Uh huh, you too” you respond, gesturing with your eyebrows as you unlock the door to your truck.

Eddie’s eyes follow yours behind him, shoulder’s quickly slumping at the sight and question he already knows is coming.

“Hey uh, you mind giving us a ride home?” you overhear Dustin ask as you start your engine, quickly leaving Eddie to fulfill the drop offs you’ve done countless times since the beginning of the semester.

You turn the knob on your radio through the channels of static till the sound of the opening credits come through your speakers. With a bag of popcorn and slushies set between you, you and Max settle against your clothed truck seats, focusing on the huge screen set out 100 feet away in the big field now filled to the brim with cars full of other teenagers seeking a scary late night flick.

You let yourselves get pulled into the film, mindlessly funneling popcorn into your mouths between sips of cherry Icees. You find yourself wondering how to spark a deeper conversation with Max. As much as you don’t want to force her to open up, with each week that passes you’ve only grown more worried and concerned for her.

You’ve spent some brief time together since you moved back, giving her a ride here and there given her mom is always working, but this is the first extended time you’ve been able to spend together. As you’re lost in thought, the sound of her throat clearing from the seat next to you grabs your attention.

“Hey, I-uh, just want to say thanks. For bringing me. This is the first time I’ve gone out and done anything in a while, so…” She mutters almost shyly, hesitantly. You offer her a genuine smile that relaxes the tension in her body.

“Anytime, I’m glad you could join me. I’ve missed this, you know, our girl time.” You offer, pulling a smirk and eye roll from her. As your eyes move back to the movie, hers drift to examine your Hellfire shirt.

“Since when are you in Hellfire?” she asks curiously.

“Oh, well since last Friday. Once me and Eddie made up I decided to join.” You answer, shrugging nonchalantly as you look down and admire your new Hellfire shirt Eddie rushed to get made for you.

“Made up?” She prods with an eyebrow cocked.

“It’s a long story.” You answer dismissively as you shake your head, assuming she wouldn’t be interested.

“Oh, so you got to hear all the gossip about my relationship back in the summer but I don’t get to hear about yours?”

Your eyes widen as you look at her with a smirk, caught off-guard by the witty remark you always knew her for but haven’t seen much of in the last few weeks.

“Eddie and I aren’t in a relationship. We’re just friends, Max.”

“Uh huh.”

“I’m serious!”

“Well, I still wanna know the juicy details of the ‘making up’ you two did.” She insists, crossing her arms across her chest as she settles further into the passenger seat of your truck.

You scoff out a mix between a laugh and a groan before letting your eyes survey her again.

“There’s no ‘juicy’ details, not that I’d tell you if there was anyway.” You emphasize before continuing, “We just have always been best friends, ever since I first moved to Hawkins. We got close pretty quickly. But then I moved back to Virginia and…”

“And?”

“I um, I stopped talking to him. Stopped returning his calls.” You answer with a sigh, meeting her blue eyes as they begin to reflect a knowing feeling.

“Why?”

“It was just too painful to deal with, to hear his voice, to be reminded of the loss that came with the move. It’s like, being so overcome with that pain that you just avoid everyone, let alone that person that it’s attached to. Sometimes it just feels easier to be alone in your pain.” You end with a shrug despite knowing how true some of that may ring for her too.

She pulls her eyes from you to the sweating cup of slushie in her hands as she nods briefly.

“Yeah, I get that.” Is all she offers in the moment. You let a few seconds pass by before you continue.

“I mean I ended up regretting it but, it was just too easy to get stuck in the pain and then the anxiety, you know. I never spoke to him again till I just moved back. We had some brief hurdles to overcome but, we talked things out and we’ve been able to start our friendship again.”

She nods again, briefly lifting her eyes to meet yours again with a forced smile before turning her gaze to the movie.

“I’m glad you guys worked things out.”

“Yeah, me too.” you mutter softly as you turn your own gaze back to the movie.

Part of you is hoping this is a small step in the right direction. Hoping that Max takes the fact that you can somewhat understand how she’s feeling, what she’s going through as a sign you’re a safe space for her. Someone she can open up to and who will actually understand.

Opening up about your own experience with Eddie, and your struggle with depression and isolation is your first step, initiating the bigger conversation with Max in a way. So you leave it at that, leaving it to her to decide what she wants to do with it as you attempt to get yourself back into the film you can tell you’ve already lost key information in due to your conversation.

The drive back to Forest Hills is silent besides the sound of the breeze blowing through the cracked windows and your joined hums along to the Kate Bush Hounds of Love cassette playing through the speakers. You pull into your driveway close to 11pm, turning to Max with an almost shy smile as you shift into park.

“Did you have a good time?” You ask with a hint of nervousness as you search her face and body language. She leans forward in the seat, nodding her head gently.

“Yeah, thanks again.” She reassures you. You remove your keys from the ignition, but stop yourself from opening your door and getting out when you notice her hand hesitating on the door handle.

“Hey, what’s up?” you ask, voice soft. Her body leans back slightly, but her eyes still refuse to lift from the floor of your truck to your eyes.

“What you told me earlier about you and Eddie. I just- I know how you felt.”

“I know, sweetie.” You reply with a sigh, leaning back into your own seat. When her eyes look up to meet yours, you elaborate. “That’s why I told you. So you’d know I understand. I won’t lie and say I completely know everything you’re probably going through, but I do know some of it and... I just hope you know I’m always here, no judgment.”

She takes your words in and lets them settle, staring down at her fidgeting hands as she musters together the courage to let you in, like she had so easily before all summer. But this is different.

“I just… I feel so guilty. I can’t escape that night, that image of Billy, even in my dreams. He-He sacrificed himself for me and I just…watched.” You listen to her intently, giving her the space to say all she wants before you speak up.

“I understand why you feel that way. I still get flashbacks and nightmares of that night sometimes too.”

“You do?”

“Of course. Living through something like that, it’s gonna stick with us. And that guilt part? That’s normal too, there's even a name for it. Survivor’s guilt. You blame yourself for what happened, maybe you even wish it happened to you instead. But you are not to blame, Max. None of that was your fault.”

“Still, I just stood there and watched, I was frozen. Maybe I could have done something, maybe I could have helped.” She stutters out, pain and frustration sketched across her face. Your heart breaks at the sight, at seeing her carry all the responsibility for what happened on her shoulders, weighing her down for months.

“I hear you. I know it’s frustrating, eating you up. You’re mad at yourself, wishing you could change what happened. Have you ever heard of fight or flight?” When she nods, you keep going. “Well, that’s not all there is to it. Freezing is also a very normal reaction to something traumatic. You didn’t have a choice, your nervous system decided for you.”

She looks at you, wiping a tear as it falls from her eyes.

“Really? You're not just making that up to make me feel better, right?”

You shake your head in reassurance, both taking a deep breath against heavy chests with the weight of the pain.

“I was there with you too, Max. It all happened so fast, even if we hadn’t frozen… there’s nothing we could have done.”

Flashbacks hit you as you speak, seeing Billy get trapped under falling pillars and rubble from the mall fire, and his instant death from the crushing weight. Rubble that would’ve fallen on Max.

She reluctantly shakes her head in agreement as you finish, the same memories flashing through her mind, knowing you’re right. Beginning to let herself believe it. Letting you chip away at the weight she’s been carrying, letting herself feel the small relief that comes with it.

“I know you’re right. It’s been hard to try to convince myself of it but… hearing it from you too. It helps. That’s not all of it though… I think about how much I hated him, all the thoughts I had about him. I’d lay in bed at night and wish something bad would happen to him.” She whispers, shame bleeding through her words.

“Max” you breathe out in empathy at her confession, reaching out to grab and squeeze her hand, pulling her attention back to you. “Wanting someone who did nothing but torment you out of your life does not make you a bad person, and it doesn’t make you responsible for what happened to him, either. Billy was not a good person, but everyday I am so grateful he had enough good left in him to save you. Because you are good and you deserve to forgive yourself, hun.”

You pour your heart into every word, staring intently into her blue eyes as tears now freely stream from them and fill your own waterline. You see her breath stuttering in her chest before she throws her arms around you, both quickly closing the space between as you embrace each other.

“You are so loved, Max Mayfield. Don’t you ever forget that.” You mutter out the words you know she needs to hear. You know the dark place the guilt, shame, and trauma have taken her too well. You hold her for a minute until you feel her arms begin to slip from you. As she comes back into your vision, an idea hits you.

“I know something else that might help. Why don’t you write him a letter?” She looks at you in slight confusion, so you push further. “I’m serious! Write him a letter with everything you want to say to him, what you’ve been holding in. Go to his grave and read it out loud like you're actually saying it to him, let it all out. And then, burn it, bury it, I don’t care. As long as you get rid of it in some way. Say what you want to say to him, and then let it go.”

She considers your words for a moment before she nods.

“Yeah, that actually doesn’t sound like a bad idea.”

“I’ll even take you, I’ll stay in the truck the whole time too. You just let me know, okay?” You offer, voice soaked in sincerity.

She’s quiet sitting there, lost in thought as she fidgets with her zipper. After a moment, you hear her voice quietly croak out.

“I wish you were my sister.”

It’s a whisper, a nervous confession you could’ve easily missed had all of your attention not already been on her. You greet her with a smile as she chances a look from her hands to your face, wiping the fallen tears on her cheeks with her jacket sleeves.

“We may not be blood, but I’ll be your older sister for as long as you’ll have me.”

When she returns your small smile, you raise your hand in front of you, pinky finger extended. A short giggle at the lighthearted childishness of it escapes her mouth before she wraps her pinky around yours.

Soft smiles, dried tear stains, and a promise to always be there for her.

Thursday, October 31st, 1985

Halloween Night

You examine yourself in your vanity mirror, fluffing your hair you spent nearly an hour on to make sure it’s perfect. Purple eyeshadow matching your purple dress, sharp winged eyeliner. You smile at yourself, hands following the way your dress accentuates your wide hips before flowing out around your thick thighs. Looking down at your high heels, you wish you’d picked a different character to dress up as, already foreseeing the pain your feet would be in at the end of the night.

With a sigh, one final look over in the mirror, and the clock nearing the time of the scheduled meet-up with your friends, you turn off your lights and close your bedroom door.

“Don’t you look cute!” your mother exclaims as you enter the living room, hands covering her cheeks as she gushes over you. You bashfully roll your eyes but share a big smile with her.

“You like it? It looks good?” You ask with your arms spread out, giving a little twirl.

“You look beautiful, honey. I wish you’d dress like this more often!” You stop yourself from giving a less than bashful eye roll this time, but can’t deny that you feel and look good in this dress.

“Don’t stay out too late, it’s still a school night!” She gives you a kiss on the cheek as you part, you give her the reassurance you’ll be back before 11 as you head out the front door.

The sound of your heels clapping against the cement fills the silence of the neighborhood as you begin crossing the road toward Eddie’s trailer. Your head shoots up when you hear a low whistle, eyes landing on Eddie as he sits on his porch steps with a smug grin on his face.

“My, my, my. Look at you.” he mutters, observing you as you approach. The darkness of the night casting a shadow over him to hide the way his eyes rake over your exposed thighs, dress swishing against them with each step. He hasn’t seen you in a dress since you were kids and your mom had more control over your outfit choices. Seeing you now, he thinks it’s one thing he might take your mom’s side on, you need to add more dresses to your wardrobe.

“Yeah, yeah. Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

“You know what, I think that’s a fantastic idea. Bring a camera?”

“Shut up.” You giggle, slapping him on the shoulder as you stand beside him.

“What?! You look nice. I can’t tell my best friend she looks nice?”

“Whatever you say, Munson. Besides, you know your pants are supposed to be khaki right? Or atleast brown!” You tease as you pull at a loose string around the knee of his ripped black jeans.

“Hey, at least I got the shirt right.” He retorts as he points at his green shirt, literally the only item of clothing he's sporting to mimic his character.

Both your heads turn at the sound of feet approaching. You smile at the sight of your red-headed younger friend. Ever since that night at the drive-in, that Sunday when you gave her a ride to Billy’s grave, she’s slowly started coming back around the party again, beginning to let everyone back in and you couldn’t be happier. You wrap your arms around her for a quick hug as she joins you and Eddie.

“I’m so happy you came!” you beam, pulling a laugh from her as you move your bodies side to side in the embrace.

“You look good.” She remarks with a quirked eyebrow as you part.

“Thanks, Red.”

Eddie stands up from the porch steps during your greeting.

“Nice to officially meet you, Mad Max. Who are you supposed to be anyway?” He asks, both of you examining her outfit.

“Dr. Sarah Bowman from Day of the Dead. Already had everything I needed for it in my closet.” She answers with a shrug, gaining a nod of approval from both of you.

“Well, we ready to get this party started?” He asks, dangling the keys to his van from his fingers.

With that, the three of you load into Eddie’s van and head to pick up the boys before going to the final meeting place of Steve’s house. Steve ensuring all of you his neighborhood is the best trick or treating spot in town. Full of well-off families who give out full-sized candy bars.

When you pull up to the end of Mike’s driveway to pick up the three boys, your eyes widen and mouth drops open in disbelief at the sight of Dustin. While Mike dressed up as the Hulk, Lucas as Indiana Jones, you can't believe your eyes when you see Dustin clad with dog ears, a tail, and collar.

“No fucking way.” you laugh out in disbelief.

“What? You can’t have the gang without Scooby!”

You and Eddie try to bite back your chuckles, shaking your heads at the sight.

“Oh, I can’t wait till Steve sees this.”

“Just get in the van.” Eddie finally gets out between bits of laughter, cheeks turning red.

“See? We’ve even got the Mystery Machine van too, only thing missing was me.”

When Eddie and you share a glance, it only sends you into another bout of laughter as he shifts into drive, rolling out of the neighborhood toward Steve’s.

When Steve’s door opens to reveal him in full Fred get-up, with Robin next to him as Velma you smile brightly, the costumes suiting them both so well.

“Oh you’ve got to be shitting me” Steve exhales at the sight of Dustin who only greets him with his ‘pearly whites’.

“I had nothing to do with this” you claim defensively, hands up as you approach Steve and Robin, the latter’s face adorned with a shit-eating grin. When Steve sees it, the hands go on the hips.

“Rob- Seriously?”

“What? What are we just gonna have Shaggy, Daphne, Fred, Velma and no Scooby?”

“That’s what I said!” Dustin interjects in agreement.

“I can’t believe this” he mutters.

“I have to admit, you showed some great ingenuity with the costume, though.” Eddie adds amid Steve’s groans. When his eyebrows shoot up in response, looking at Eddie in disbelief, he retorts. “What? The kid’s creative, what can I say?”

“Thank you” Dustin finishes with a smug smile.

“We all look great, okay? Now, we gonna take these rich folks for all they’ve got or what?” You press, pushing everyone to begin the trek down the streets of Steve’s neighborhood, younger kids taking the lead.

Only a few houses in, the streets are littered with kids and teens in costumes. You talk amongst yourselves, commenting on your favorites and the craftiness of a few of the ones you see.

You’re filled with warmth watching the younger teens walking ahead, watching Max let herself come back out of her shell. You don’t miss the shy glances shared between her and Lucas either, smiling at the sight. While Eddie and Robin are deep in conversation about band, Steve falls in step next to you, sharing your gaze ahead.

“That’s cute” he remarks watching the two. “How did you manage that?”

“I don’t know, just told her what she needed to hear I guess.”

He peeks a glance toward Robin and Eddie before leaning closer to you.

“So, when are you and Eddie finally gonna get your head out of your asses and get together?”

You stagger in your step, taken aback as you look at him like he just spawned a second head.

“What?” Is all you can scoff out.

“Oh come on.” he remarks, hands in his pockets as he saunters down the sidewalk before he leans closer once again, “You’re not as subtle as you think you are.”

You roll your eyes at him, but the warmth filling your cheeks and smile tugging at your lips gives you away.

“Is it that obvious?” you whisper worriedly.

You two stop at the end of a walkway to a house as the rest of the group goes to the front door.

“Well to me and Robin, yeah. But obviously not to him.”

You watch as they begin their walk back towards you, admiring the smile on Eddie’s face while amongst conversation with the kids.

“He doesn’t see me like that. I’m just his best friend.” You decide with a sigh, slightly shaking your head before looking back up to Steve who’s observing you with a sympathetic smile.

“Are you kidding? He’d be crazy not to, you’re a total catch.” he says, playfully bumping your hip with his.

“Thanks, Stevie.”

Eddie’s smile falters slightly as they approach, catching sight of you and Steve standing there staring and smiling at each other. Being dressed as Fred and Daphne, a couple, doesn’t help either. He doesn’t believe you’d have any reason to lie to him that you don’t like Steve as more than a friend, but as he eyes the way Steve smiles at you, the ping of jealousy in his chest tells him he’s not too sure Steve’s on the same page. Maybe it’s the way he looks at you, maybe it’s the way Steve’s playful with you like he is, and Eddie knows the deeper feelings that underlie his own teasing nature with you.

When your breath-taking smile turns to him, those thoughts falter slightly and he can’t help but flash his dimples right back at you.

“You know you’re sharing some of that loot with me, right?” You ask him, bumping his shoulder as he falls in step next to you as you continue your walk through the neighborhood.

“Psh, I’ve worked hard for this. Should’ve brought your own pillowcase and ring some doorbells if you wanted some candy.” He smirks at you, dark eyes glimmering in the night.

“Uh huh, you’re all talk, Munson. We both know by the end of the night half that bag is coming home with me.”

“Hmph, well I suggest you start putting in the work if you want some of this sugar.”

The thoughts that immediately run through your head from his teasing remark make your cheeks flush and send a jolt right to your core. You squeeze your thighs together as you walk, attempting to push the sensation away. Thoughts and feelings like this about Eddie are reserved for late nights in your room. As much as you tell yourself it’s wrong, it’s getting harder and harder to resist. The way he teases you doesn’t help either.

The slowly intensifying, pounding pain and soreness from your feet in the cramped purple high heels is a welcomed distracting sensation. You groan softly to yourself as you look around and realize you’re only halfway through Steve’s neighborhood. A glance toward Robin’s red sneakers solidifies your decision that you should’ve followed her steps, switching out the character’s heels for much comfier shoes.

You look around your group of friends and decide to say fuck it and suck it up. It’s your favorite holiday and you’re with your favorite people, you’re gonna enjoy it despite the pain in your feet and unwelcomed bodily sensations Eddie’s words and looks are striking into you.

As you continue through Steve’s neighborhood, joining in the trick or treating activities despite the few sideways glances from homeowners you earn as teenagers asking for candy, you’re reminded of all the things that make Halloween your favorite.

The cool autumn air.

The changing colors of the leaves that have begun to adorn the streets and sidewalks.

The costumes; from scary to funny, store bought to homemade.

The decorations; glowing orange pumpkins with an array of designs carved into them, orange and purple lights hung along the porches, scarecrows and ghosts littered amongst the lawns.

The slasher films waiting to be watched at home while eating the mountain of candy earned from knocking on your neighbors doors.

The way Dustin takes every chance he can get to say “Ruh roh Raggy”, and the way you and Eddie can’t stop yourselves from giggling every single time.

You breathe it all in, grounding yourself in this shared moment with your friends you’ll never forget, a permanent smile settling in on your face for the night.

A smile that not even Jason and his idiot friends can stop from creasing your round cheeks. You’re so consumed living in the moment that you don’t even notice them until you hear a loud

“Hey!” Both you and Eddie’s heads turn and spot them across the street, but refuse to let your strides falter.

“Look guys, it’s the Freaks Inc. gang!” he booms, buddies bending over in laughter as they watch your group.

“Pfft, what a tool.” Steve remarks with a scoff, shaking his head as he fixes his gaze away from them and forward, unbothered. Grateful to no longer be grouped with people like him.

When you feel yourself begin to bump into the younger boys whose steps have staggered and attention drawn to the insult, you gently nudge them forward. Muttering a “Keep going, I’ve got this.”

You should just ignore them, not even give them the slither of attention or acknowledgement they’re so desperate for, but you just can’t help yourself. Not when an opportunity arises to burst their egotistical bubble.

Ever since you and Eddie’s altercation with Jason a month ago, him and his friends have generally left the club alone, not directly confronting any of you. Traded insults with his friends when any of you would walk by, sure, but to be fair the threat you gave him only pertained to if he ever put his hands on any of you again. Anything else is fair game, and it’s a game you have no problem playing.

You quickly eye him and his costume. He-Man. It’s a nice costume too, nearly identical to the show. Easy when you have Daddy’s money to pay for it.

“Nice He-Man costume, Jason. Looks like you’re having a bit of trouble filling it out though, huh? Tsk, what a shame.” you say sarcastically, feigning a pouty face with a shrug before your smile returns, rolling your eyes at them as you draw your attention back to your friends. Continuing your walk down the street unphased.

You see Eddie staring at you from the corner of your eye. When you look at him, he’s looking down at you in a mix of endearment, pride, and amazement.

“What? He deserves to get knocked down a peg. Should keep his mouth shut next time.”

“Agreed.” Steve declares from the other side of Eddie.

Eddie doesn’t say anything, just wraps an arm around you and pulls you in for a tight side hug as you walk down the street. You let him, resisting the urge to bury your face and body into his side, his warmth, when his grip lightens and falls from your arm.

After another half hour of knocking on doors, you’re nearly done sweeping through Steve’s neighborhood, his house and Eddie’s van coming back into sight as you approach the last couple of houses. If it wasn’t for already going to every house in the neighborhood, the boys' complaints about how heavy their bags have gotten with candy is signaling the end of the night.

You stand with Eddie at the end of the walkways to the last few houses as the rest get the last of the candy for the night. He catches your eye when he reaches into his pocket, pulling out a rolled joint and a lighter. Just before he lights it, your laugh grabs his attention.

“Really, Eddie? In the middle of this uppity neighborhood?”

“What? I’m only being in character.” He laughs out, only to have you meet him with raised brows and a smirk. “Shaggy and Scooby are stoners and that’s a fact. Constantly having the munchies? I mean, HELLO!”

“You’re so dumb” you jest playfully as you resume your slow stride on the sidewalk.

“Well, you know what they say. Birds of a feather flock together.” He breathes out, keeping in step next to you.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

“Oh really? How’s about I push your ass down this hill right here?” you tease, gesturing toward the down sloped hill between the houses as you pass.

“Pfft, I’d like to see you try.” he scoffs, playing unphased despite the wide grin on his face.

“Your skinny ass will go flying, right down into that drop off in the woods. Lost forever. Such a tragedy. Some say he's still tumbling to this day.” you sigh dramatically, earning a short but loud laugh from him.

“Uh huh. Well I’m pretty quick on my feet if I do say so myself, and I don’t think you’ll be getting too far in those heels.” he retorts, pointing down to the heels that have made your feet numb at this point.

“Well you see, there’s this concept called taking them off?” You tease, bumping your body against his. “I could outrun you.”

The rest of your friends at the last house on the route are forgotten behind you as you near Steve’s.

“That so?”

“Mhmm.” you state simply, arms crossed against your chest and head held high.

“Say, you still ticklish around… here”

You squeal at the quick flicker of his fingers at the side of your waist, jumping away from him. You take wary steps backward as you move in front of him, hands slightly held out.

“You can outrun me, huh? Wanna test that?” he pushes, creeping closer to you with a mischievous smirk and sparkle in his eye. You’ve known him long enough to know he’s about to make you eat your words.

A quick flinch towards you sends you scurrying. With no chance to take off your heels, your strides are stifled as you run the short distance to Steve’s driveway as quickly as you can. Eddie follows closely behind, tickling your sensitive sides every chance he can get, giggling maniacally when it falters your steps as you flinch away.

Everyone else on the street probably thinks you’re crazy, freaks. You aren’t paying them any attention anyway as the smile on your face begins hurting your cheeks, eyes zeroing in on Eddie’s van a few short paces away.

You throw yourself against it, but Eddie’s relentless. Going for both your sides at the same time as you turn around to face him, sending you into a fit of giggles as you feebly attempt to push him away.

You see your opportunity and quickly jab your fingers into his armpits, sending him back with a flinch and a chuckle. He gives up, leaning back against the van next to you as you both laugh between attempts to catch your breath.

You playfully smack his arm, earning a fake “Ouch” and one of the biggest smiles you’ve ever seen adorn his beautiful face.

“You asshole, Eddie-Bo-Beddie” you tease, emphasizing the pronunciation of your favorite personal nickname for him that he’s always claimed to hate. In truth, he loves it.

“Alright, alright. How’s about I share half my loot to make it up to you, what do you say?” he teases back with the plan you both knew was already going to happen anyway.

“Oh my god” you groan and roll your eyes, only making him to laugh more as you push yourself off the van with the rest of your friends quickly approaching.

“Ugh, they make me sick. I wish they’d just kiss already and get it over with.” Robin mumbles to Steve, pulling a laugh from him as he nods in agreement, watching the show you two have put on.

“Tell me about it.”

With both yours and the younger members of the party’s curfews approaching, you say your goodbyes to Robin and Steve. Embracing them both with tight hugs before piling into Eddie’s van.

Riding down the empty streets of Hawkins with the van windows cracked, the cool air a welcomed sensation against your warm cheeks. The smile never fading from your lips as the sounds of Metallica playing low through the van speakers and the chatter from the kids in the back fill your ears. Your head leaning back against the passenger seat headrest rolls to spare a glance to Eddie. His eyes meet yours, mimicking your smile and sending a shock wave right to your heart.

You make me feel like I am young again.

You sigh in content as you face the winding roads again, deciding this year just might be your favorite Halloween yet.

#eddie munson fic #eddie munson x plus size reader #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x plussize!reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #bestfriend!eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson x fem reader #bsf!eddie #bsf!eddie munson #one step away from you

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casablancarossa · 1 year ago

Text

Lipstick Smudge << a [fluffy] taemin x reader scenario>>

For the anon who asked:

hii ^^ could you possibly write something for taemin where you guys are doing that chapstick challenge where you put on different chapsticks and he has to kiss you to guess what flavor it is. Or even that one tiktok trend where you smudge your lipstick and then he goes to fix it and the camera turns and he has lipstick marks all over his face. 🙏🙏

Reposting this because it's a shame it didnt pop up in tags.

You re-align your camera, trying to get a perfect view of the corner of your room. It was the only place that wouldn't have any reflection of the rest of your space. It wasn't that the 70% was dirty or unseemly for an influencer, but most of the time it was to hide the man with the shit eating grin, trying to distract you from creating any good content while he was around.

"Jagiya, I feel offended, you really are trying to hide me huh?" Taemin whines as he catched his hoodie with his face.

It has been 20 minutes since you tried to make sure that you were trying to hide items that might relate to him. Chucking items left and right, out of sight.

"You know, none of my stuff will link back to me...", he lets out a sigh, pouting as he sits on the other side of the phone setup, fiddling with various cases of lipbalms, with the labels frayed and torn off. "Beside you want to live stream don't you?"

It's no secret to those who follow you, that you have a boyfriend and make the excuse that he was the one who isn't interested in being in front of the camera and would rather support you from the side, hidden. Taemin smiled as he picks up of the chapstick and quickly swips the bullet against his lips, before making kissing noises, his lips puckered and pointed at you with that stupid smile on his face. "You're an idiot if you just want a kiss, an plus that's for the challenge!", you cried out halfheartedly as you slide into the seat with a spare phone in hand, ready to post a story that you were about to go on live soon.

For weeks, Taemin was very into the idea of at least making sure that your viewers didn't think you were full of shit by saying you had a boyfriend and just didn't want to show him off. Haters often comment that you were lying and you were completely 'motae solo'. Soon it went viral that you were single and delusional when in fact you had purposedly shoved Taemin into the bushes during one of your walks when Dispactch caught you walking at night by the Han River.

You re-adjust yourself in your seat, counting the numbers of people who had viewed your story before turning on your Insta live and sat back, waiting for your viewers to come in. Your fortnight lives was something that you enjoyed doing, whether it was cooking challenges or just late night pillow talk, you were appreciative of the fans who had swarmed in from TikTok, to join you in your lives.

Soon, you were greeting your followers, conversing with them through the comments they have left and began to introduce the fact that your partner was behind the camera, really wanting to do the chapstick challenge with you. Taemin had caused a ruckus by trying to slide one your indoor clothes line into view, with a perfectly draped sheet on it, so he could hide behind it.

Meanwhile, the comments were in a frenzy, saying how they had never heard you sound so relaxed and giggly before. Some comments were even teasing you to pull down the sheets so they could see your boyfriend. It came to the time where Taemin had reapplied the lipbalm he kept on hand, yelling at you to taste him already.

At his comment, you snorted and laughed, deeming his words as inappropriate because people might take it the wrong way.

"Yeobo, fine, shut up!" You laughed as you wheeled your chair towards the curtain and dart your head to peck his lips before popping out so the viewers could see you smack your lips, hmm-ing and haa-ing about the flavour.

"Cherry?"

"Oh? Is it? I don't know.." Taemin teased.

"What do you mean?", you asked bewildered, reaching back behind the curtains to grab the component out of his hand and reading the underside of it where you had written the flavour. "Ya. Lee-ssi, you need to read the bottom! The fans will get angry at you!", you laughed in defeat as Taemin lets out a loud giggle, enough for the fans to comment about it. "It was cherry by the way.", you speak to the camera.

You reached forward to grab another two unlabelled chapsticks, throwing one towards the back of the curtain for Taemin to catch as you apply one on yourself, the distinct smell and flavour should be easy for him. "All right, I'm ready.", you grinned before moving your head.

An aggravated groan left your throat as you saw Taemin, sheepishly applying the new flavoured balm on his lips. "Yah..", you put out a struggled smile as you were fully slumped into your seat, one hand on your face, massaging your temples. "It's supposed to be my turn, for you to guess the flavour...", you whined as your eyes catch the over flowing number of laughing emojis dancing across the screen.

"Ah okay okay, I got too excited.", Taemin giggles, attempting to wipe his lips before puckering them again for you to kiss.

You lean in to peck his lips, hoping that he would get the right answer. "Ahh! Lemon!", his answer was too confident for your liking.

You had shifted back closer to the phone, to look at the comments with an unamused look on your face saying "No." to his guess, encouraging to try again. Taemin went suddenly quiet, and through the screen, behind the draped sheets, you could see two arms pop out holding a phone with your livestream playing. "Yah, you look shit, when you are pouting like that.", he laughs, teasing you like always.

"What?! You are such an idiot." you breathed out in defeat as the viewers teased that your boyfriend, is such a troublemaker and seems to get a kick out of annoying you.

"Yes, everyone, he has been the bane of my existence for a year now."

"A year?! I'm hurting..."

"Okay, two??? Three?"

"Probably halfway to three? Way before I joined the army."

"Almost three years, he has been a pain in my head" you smiled towards the camera before looking back at the sheets, now seeing the faint glow of a phone screen behind them.

"Was it orange?" He finally comments out.

"Yes... Your turn.", you let out a sigh before returning to look behind the improv-ed covers to see Taemin, smiling at you. He couldn't resist and held your seat by the armrest and pulled your seat towards him so he could plant a soft kiss on your lips before peppering small pecks around your face. Taemin lets out a small cackle before pushing your seat out, causing it to roll back to your desk.

The seat was still swiveled to face him and as you turned around you made your guess. "Was that strawberry? It tasted like strawberries." you muttered.

As you turn to face the camera, it took a while for you to process that the lighting in the room, made it hard for you to discern that your face was now covered in faint tints of pink kisses. While inspecting your face through the screen, you could see Taemin's hands slowly sliding out from the side with his thumbs up followed by an 'okay' sign followed by a series of breathless laughter. "You look like I just mawled you."

"Wow, y/n eonnie, he must really love you. Wah eonnie, you are so lucky.", you read out the comments out loud, snickering at each one, which made you blush.

"Why does he have such femenine lips?", Taemins voice erupted from behind the sheet. "Reported!"

"Imagine if that isn't her boyfriend... Reported." he continues on.

You placed your arm on the desk, propping your chin up as you converse through the comments asking that you should make a TikTok with him right now. You stated once more, you weren't sure what challenge you could do that wouldn't impede on his privacy and internally, it disheartened you that you couldn't scream to the world that you were in love with someone without saying his name, and Taemin couldn't think of ways to console you. He wasn't afraid to admit he was in a relationship with you and it wasn't the first time you two had been linked together anyway. But you kept rejecting the idea because you assumed, both of you may not have the mental constitution to keep fighting the haters.

A couple minutes went by and you resumed doing the chapstick challenge, commenting there was probably 4 more flavours to try. Each one turned more chaotic as Taemin had caused a scene because he was determined to shift the sheet screen closer so he could steal he muscat grape chapstick from your desk without being seen. Your spare phone lit up from under you with a message from Taemin with a link. You opened it up to see the new lipstick tiktok trend and underneath the link, he messages you once more. 'My love let's do this...'

Before you could even collect your thoughts, Taemin spoke out once more, now speaking towards your viewers. "Everyone! Be patient right now, we'll film something okay?"

"Really??", your eyes widened, unsure how to react.

Taemin stood up, his head was just fortunately cut off from view of the camera. He mouths a few words which you understood as, 'lower the camera so we can walk around comfortably'. You followed through, lowering the camera so it focused more on your desk, but still had enough view to see that you and your boyfriend can now be seen from the waist down and were now walking around and there were indeed two people in the room.

"We still have the stream running up and we are viewing it through another phone, so we can still read comments and respond to everyone" you called out cheerfully, hoping the numbers don't die down.

You quickly grab a dark lipstick and carefully applied while Taemin looked at you with such an endearing stare. "Please god tell me why I was gifted such a beautiful partner.", he gleefully jumps and down, barely controlling his excitement.

"Such a con-man, you are only doing this because you are on camera my love."

Effortlessly, your lips began to retaliate with kisses across Taemin's face, each time, he giggles. Every time he checks his reflection through his phone camera he would voice out his displeasement that some of the kiss marks were uneven and that you should either kiss his face harder, or top up your lipstick.

Y/N-nie, what was the most stupid thing he did?

"Oh...? There was that time he said he could walk across the frozen pond and if he got to the other side, I owed him a new kitten", you started much to Taemin's behest. "Well.. He fell halfway in and was super super grumpy but I got him a grey and white kitten a week later."

Once he was satisfied with his over all look, Taemin takes off the jacket he was wearing, boldly showcasing more of his figure, but in his head, no doubt people wouldn't confuse him with a look-a-like, people would know it was him. Lee Taemin.

How did you two meet?

"We met an an event. She was panicking so hard she skipped greeting me and shook hands with my friend instead." Taemin replied, causing you to smack his chest.

The lipsticks swipes across your lips for the final time to get it even before asking your boyfriend if he was ready to film. He passes a phone to you, with the front camera at the ready. You proceed to start recording with one hand while lipstick in the other, bumping your arm to cause a smudge at your lower lip.

As Taemin's hand reaches up to caress your cheek, he guides you by the chin to look at him as you pan the camera towards him, his side profile in sight, obviously covered with stamps of your painted lips, looking at you lovingly before casting a devilish grin from the corner of his lips. The camera pulls back slightly, so that both of you were in frame, smiling contently as you look at each other, before facing the camera with a cheeky smile as he pecks your cheeks, leaving another faint tint of the strawberry chapstick.

As far as content making goes, it was perfect and you felt like if you could, you would post it as is, one try, one take. But you saved it as draft after viewing it and placed the phone down. Commenting out loud, there was no need to redo it, it looked perfect enough, Taemin agreed with you before adding that he thinks it would go viral. Your head spins to throw him a frown and pout, objecting to the idea despite the fact he knows, how much you would love the thought of finally no longer keeping things a secret.

Will you be posting it?

Please post it. What did you film? Will it be uploaded soon?

Guys... They were suspiciously quiet... Guys.. It's okay to turn of the livestream now if you want.

You and Taemin giggle at the following comments before he lunges behind the camera as you tilt your phone upwards, letting it re-focus as you waited in front of it as you continue talking to Taemin. It was obvious to anyone who was watching you that you loved your boyfriend so much. Your eyes were so soft and endearing towards him and you looked at him as if it was he first time you saw him and Cupid had his arrow at the ready.

"Hmm, I'm not sure I'll post it, but it's on drafts so you never know", you sang in a sweet teasing tone. "But please ask questions.."

Y/N eonnie's boyfriend. Do you think, eonnie is the one?

"Do you think I'm the one?"

"Everyday.", Taemin replied eliciting causing a reaction on your face that could only be described as look of awe and constant realization how in love with you were.

An hour had somehow passed by and Taemin was more than happy to air out embarrassing stories, habits of yours that he found adorable and personal questions about his likes and dislikes. Everyone was ecstatic to know that he was more keen in being in lives if he was allowed to be more present.

"Everyone.. Once I finally reveal myself, hopefully you keep on supporting y/n and us." Taemin announced.

"Jagiya, you are giving them too much hope, we have to end the stream soon and get to our dinner with your...friends..", the last word caused you to stumble almost saying 'manager', which might imply that your boyfriend was somewhat more of a big-deal.

You were finally addressing your goodbyes reminding your viewers that you will be back on again and on your next post that they should comment what they would like to see next. However your attention was caught by the alarming statements that flooded your screen.

Wait is this real? Eonnie? You are a lucky bitch. How the heck did you catch a guy like him. Gosh you could see it his eyes, this isn't a joke. Y/N and Taemin look good together. Is 'dinner with friends', actually dinner with SHINee?

The last two comments had made you dizzy in your seat. What was going on? Your hands would instinctively fumble around your desk so you could find your phone to check what was going on. If it weren't for Taemin, clearing his throat you wouldn't have looked up at him. There he was leaning over he desk, resting on one hand while the other was waving his phone with the screen pointed out to you.

It had not occurred to you that it was your tiktok account that was logged in on his phone and while you were too distracted trying to read the comments, Taemin had handed his phone to you to film instead and while he was answering questions, he was oddly pre-occupied with his phone. From what you could see between his phone and how your spare phone is going insane with notifications. You quickly open your phone to check. It was official. Taemin had posted the video on your behalf and even linked it in Instgram, tagging his ID.

"I'm not scared to tell the world that I love you. So I posted it.", he smiled.

Taemin smirked as worry had set on your face, lips slightly gaped in shock as Taemin made the first move to publicize your relationship. Like he was the first one to say I love you almost three years ago. Like he was the first one to chase after you after a serious argument. Like he was the first one to do informal introductions with his family.

The woman was too stunned to speak kekekeke. Holy shit, she really didn't expect this. You guuuys, you are too cute. Please don't break each other's heart.

Taemin quickly rushed around the table and knelt down beside your seat, wrapping an arm around you. Your eyes followed his line of movement, never breaking away, so many questions in your head and so much more emotions. Primarily, you were ready to cry.

"Okay, while y/n recovers, see you in two weeks guys!", he waves towards the camera.

Your body slumps down onto the desk, struggling to let out a pained chuckle before sitting up slightly to cover your suddenly flushed face with your hands. You were so embarrassed that you continued to try hide your face with one hand as you waved at the camera.

"You are insane Lee Taemin. You idiot", you giggle, smacking his shoulders playfully in a repeated manner as he leans forward to end the livestream, flashing a playful grin and thumbs up as it cuts and the live has ended.

"Yeah, I'm insane about you, but now we don't have to hide it anymore. Plus, the old Dispatch articles didn't have a lot of hate comments on it...", he calmly stands up and leans on the edge of the desk,

"Yeah.. But your fans are going to rip me apart... I'm not really.. Conventional?"

"We'll figure it out okay?"

"Okay..."

"So... It was viral years ago. But do you think fans will realize you were the girl at the fan event and you struggled to shake hands with me and greeting Onew hyung instead?"

"Yes, because Onew laughed at you because you kept your hands out waiting and just shook your own hands when I didn't go back to you.."

Taemin rolls his eyes, remembering the video in question, reaching forward to pull the seat you were in, closer to him. He rests each hand on an arm rest and looks down at you with, kissing the crown of your head before catching your lips.

"Well now I got you back, and you are mine.."

#taemin x reader #taemin fluff #taemin scenario #taemin shinee #taemin #lee taemin #shinee #shinee x reader #taemin x female reader

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cvnntagious · 5 months ago

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does cherry have toys—like vibrator and stuff like that— and if she does, does fratboy!chris uses them on her? and how is he like with it

honestly, i couldn’t see her being much of a toy girl, but i think she may have maybe a rose because her friends were hyping it up, and likely a bullet as a little backup—i just don’t think she uses them often. if chris somehow found out about her toys, i could see him teasing her a bit, asking her if that’s what she whips out when he’s not around (as if he doesn’t drop everything to fuck her all the time), but i don’t think he’d use them on her ‘cause he’s cocky and certain his dick is always enough to get girls off; he’s not completely wrong either. the only way he’d even think to whip out her toys is if she was being bitchy and he didn’t want to give her what she wants so he uses that as replacement (or “punishment”)

#cvntagious #love grandma cvnty .ᐟ #✎ ꒰ rory's inbox ᝰ.ᐟ ꒱#↳ anon .ᐟ ‧₊#★ ⋮ fratboy!chris #★ ⋮ rich!reader #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #chris sturniolo au #christopher sturniolo au #chris sturniolo fanfic #christopher sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets

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stellar-collective · 2 months ago

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Would you pretty please with whipped cream and a cherry on top tell us your thoughts about detective beebo? <:3c I've heard many good things about the game but i dont have any of the devices i can download it on :[

ok so i actually got two asks about my Beebo Thoughts pretty much instantly so here’s what i’m gonna do! this post is gonna be basically spoiler free and a very long bulleted ramble of all the game mechanics i liked, then in a couple days when i replay it i’ll post all the spoiler-y story stuff and details i liked in response to the other ask :]

so, this one is the glowing recommendation “i’m assuming you haven’t played it” spoiler free version! woe, ramble be upon ye

alright to set ur expectations. Detective Beebo is a 5 hour indie puzzle game that u can get for free. it’s fairly straightforward and pretty short and simple, but it is executed EXTREMELY well. also it felt very catered to me personally which will absoLUTELY color my ramble so like. take everything with a grain of salt knowing this is right up my alley and such

ok first off. incredible concept. time loop reset by death but you play as one of the ppl who can’t remember a thing? ough.

THE ARTWORK IS SO GOOD. the characters have so much expression and life which is always impressive in that pixelated format and i really felt the Atmosphere in the cutscenes and such

the story had me hooked right from the start like i remembering being about ten minutes in and having that distinct “oh yeah i’m Sat i’m Ready i’m Invested” feeling

also. characters. Oliver and Ángel had my full attention right off the bat and the supporting cast was also super solid; Mari made me laugh out loud five minutes into her intro (and so did purple-haired lady; “Mad At Me Island” caught me off guard what can i say?) and the villain? oooooooo the menace the terror the brutality it was delicious.

i was kinda expecting more of a walking simulator with some light puzzles thrown in with the focus being on the death loop gimmick but to my delight the puzzles were on par with the story and so fun to work thru! like the rest of the game they required some thought but were easy to grasp and didn’t overstay their welcome

and the HINT SYSTEM. i mentioned this in the original post but i am a puzzle game lover who is also stupid so hint systems are very important to me! making good hints are more difficult than one might expect but this one was executed splendidly. the notebook, which has ur items, profiles, and observations, worked great as a multilayer hint system without being hand-holdy or too obvious! plus the streamlined story takes u smoothly from one puzzle to the next so ur rarely confused about what ur trying to accomplish which i DEEPLY appreciate.

due to the time loop shenanigans, u are exploring the same house multiple times over with different puzzles each loop. most of the same things are interactable every time, but the dialogue changes enough that ur incentivized to still click on everything every loop and then you don’t miss clues as easily!

on the story level the mystery was also very engaging; the reveal of what made the house tick (heh) got me so excited because the game gives the player space to figure it out before Beebo says anything aloud. the game is actually really good about this all round; making Beebo justttt smart enough that the player can use his conclusions as hints without him taking the satisfaction of figuring it all out from said player.

i’ll talk about this more in my spoiler ramblings but there’s this one part where the search-and-find puzzle format gets weaponized in a meta way to make u feel as powerless as Beebo does and he has to literally change the game genre to escape and that is something i am a SUCKER for oh my gosh.

i’ve only gotten one ending since i’ve only played through it once (the true ending, luckily) and it was both satisfying and adorable, wrapping up all the themes presented in a nice little bow :]

overall Beebo was the video game equivalent of like… a fancy little cupcake. it balances itself extremely well, staying bite-sized and sweet and overall is a delightful time :D

#never ask me to talk about things i like unless you want this level of detail #i am constantly holding myself back from yapping for forty paragraphs about anything and everything that catches my fancy #anyway good game would recommend 👍#thanks for the ask!#detective beebo #some of this stuff you’d read n be like “yeah isn’t that what puzzle games are just supposed to do” and yeah. you’d think that wouldn’t you

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thesilliestrovingalive · 2 months ago

Text

Sagan

POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNING: Viewer discretion is advised due to references to death, crime, drugs, infidelity, child abuse, neglect, self-harm, unhealthy romance, sexism/misogyny, incest, and SA.

Real name: Xochiquetzal Wildgrube(renamed to Sagan Roswitha Wildgrube)

Aliases: Explosive Vixen and Princess of Jewels

Nicknames: Roswi

Occupation: Major General of the Rebel Army and Sergeant of the P.F. Squad (formerly)

Retirement plans: Opening a pawn shop building that serves alcohol and has an underground nightclub with casino-style games and adult entertainment

Special skills: Proficiency in accurate aiming and smuggling illicit goods, handling of rifles and anti-tank weaponry, knowledge of the criminal underworld, self-care techniques, and courtesan work

Hobbies: Herbarium, gambling at fancy casinos, frequenting underground nightclubs and beauty shops, putting on makeup half-naked in her bedroom while listening to erotica, pop, and punk songs, and weaving blankets and shawls before embroidering colourful lunar, serpentine, and floral designs onto them

Likes: The severed heads of enemies and traitors brought by her most loyal soldiers, her childhood collection of Ty Beanie Baby snake, dragon, and cat plushies, laying on a hammock during a sunny and peaceful day, collecting vintage jewellery and alcohol, and luxurious spa days

Dislikes: Not being able to blow stuff up and getting her way, missing out on a good joyride, abusive and loveless relationships, uncomfortable sexual situations, and white supremacy

Favourite food: Sauerbraten with Kartoffelklöße and caramel fudge vanilla ice cream with pecans and strawberry sauce

Favourite drink: Cherry vanilla soda

Sexuality: Sex-favourable, bicurious heterosexual

Gender: Female

Age: 29 (in 2022), 35 (in 2028), 37 (in 2030), 39 (in 2032), 41 (in 2034), 48 (in 2041), 50 (in 2043), 51 (in 2044), and 54 (in 2047)

Blood type: O+

Weight: 166 lbs. (75 kg)

Design: She’s a 5’ 11” (180.34 cm) Quechua-Polish mesomorph of Peruvian, Brazilian, and Welsh descent with a bottom hourglass body shape, semi-broad shoulders, well-toned muscles, a voluptuous bust, and curvy legs. She has dark copper-toned skin, sunburst green-hazel eyes, frown lines, high cheekbones, a slightly straight nose, and black freckles scattered across her face and chest. She has ashy black hair that reaches slightly above her shoulders and is styled in a lob with spiky, messy waves and nose-length, middle-parted, side-swept bangs. She dyed her hair a ruby red that gradients to tangerine in the middle then transitions to yellow-green near the ends.

When Sagan becomes a cyborg after she was decapitated during the Extraterrestrial Alliance Clash, she possesses a revolutionary self-resurrection mechanism. A small stellated dodecahedron microchip embedded in her spine springs into action whenever her vital systems fail. The chip emits a low humming frequency and flashes a cyclical pattern of blue, white, and red for precisely 50 seconds. After this brief interval, she awakens in a newly prepared cyborg body, fully restored and operational with all of her memories intact.

She has received some scars, including a vertical stab mark on the palm of her right hand, self-inflicted slices on the underside of her left forearm, and a series of horizontal cuts running along her inner thighs. Located just below her buttocks, she has a large, blotchy patch of scar tissue on the back of her left thigh. She has a slice mark extending from the centre of her scalene neck muscle to just above her sternothyroid muscle. She sustained a bullet wound just below the middle of her right calf and her right pinkie finger amputated. Her left ear sustained a horizontal laceration extending from the centre of the tragus through the helix, caused by a violent tearing of the skin as a bullet flew past. Her back and buttocks bear numerous self-inflicted whip marks, and she has a gnarly, curved scar extending from the top of her left breast down to the centre of her diaphragm.

On her stomach, an Aztec-style carmine-crested rattlesnake stares forward, its body covered in golden green to blue-green plumage. The body of the feathered serpent is comfortably coiled on a patch of golden grass surrounded by a ring of smoke. Atop the serpent's head rests a four-petalled jade flower with a turquoise feathered rim and a circular obsidian mirror at its centre. An earthy green spiral Pachamama symbol is tattooed on her left shoulder, surrounded by twelve rays of undulating sunlight. She has two tattooed turquoise bands, one on each arm, and a zigzag cochineal red band encircling the centre of her neck, bisected by a semi-thick golden line.

On her left outer thigh, she has a full white gold moon surrounded by two wiggly, glowing silver-white circles. In front of the moon and partially below it are two Cantua buxifolia flowers with jade calyxes attached to a spiky branch. Blood drips from the petals like raindrops, while two male birds—a resplendent quetzal on the right and a shining sunbeam on the left—idly perch on the turquoise branch. On the left side, near the centre of her right calf, an Aztec-style adult green iguana lies on its side, its tongue sticking out and its mouth slightly open. An obsidian-tipped arrow with a burgundy wooden shaft and jade fletching pierces through its heart. In the background, to the right of the iguana, a turquoise-outlined silver-grey thin waxing crescent partially encircles it.

Sagan’s military uniform consists of a metal dog tag necklace with her name, bronze-plated sunglasses with pink-tinted lenses, and viridian driving gloves. Her shoulders are draped with a hip-length cape-like reseda green coat featuring sleeves that reach just above her mid-thighs. It has a honeydew Henley-style collar and cuffs, each adorned with a single golden button near the centre, both edged with scarlet piping. It’s adorned with golden epaulettes, each featuring two Apricot Brandy hibiscuses seated atop, and a six-petalled turquoise flower button, which has a circular piece of emerald at its centre. She wears a misty rose blouse with medium-length cuffed sleeves, two breast pockets, a golden ten-button front, and a cerulean faux tie neatly tied into a bow that falls just above the breastline. She wears a blue-green waistband featuring a thick cochineal red horizontal line in the middle, accompanied by twenty-two golden dots evenly spaced above and below the line.

When off-duty, she wears a sage green tight-fitting pencil skirt that falls to her mid-thighs, paired with silky black pantyhose and a pair of heeled phthalo blue boots that reach up to her mid-calves. She wears a reseda green peaked cap emblazoned with the Rebel Army insignia and an artificial Plumeria rubra flower on the right side. The cap features a black visor, a green gold band, and a blue-green cap strap secured by two gilded buttons.

When on duty, she wears earthy green army cargo pants tucked into a pair of navy blue combat boots with carmine spiked soles and held up by a viridian belt featuring a golden snap-on buckle. She wears a bittersweet shimmer Pickelhaube emblazoned with the Rebel Army insignia, featuring a wine red chinstrap, black visor trim, and golden side posts and spike. Additionally, she wears two black bandoliers: one slung over her right shoulder, holding explosive shells for her Anti-Tank Rifle, and a second slung over her left shoulder, containing throwing daggers and the tonfa that Tequila gave her, which once belonged to him and is secured in the central strap on her side.

When on and off duty, she wears a Kevlar bulletproof vest underneath her blouse, along with a shoulder holster for her Korth Combat revolver and two pouches for dual .38 Special magazines. Furthermore, she has three medals: above her right breast pocket, a green-tinted silver bar edged in black features a scarlet square in the centre; on her right breast, a golden circle with a pearlescent white rim and black draconic wings is on a rose red ribbon; and on her left breast, a bronze jawless skull with obsidian eyes on a malachite ribbon, featuring a magic mint stripe running along its centre.

During her time in the Peregrine Falcons Squad, her military gear consisted of a metal dog tag necklace with her name and blue-green fingerless gloves. She dons a Cambridge blue T-shirt with ripped sleeves and a sage-outlined crew neck and hem. She wears a jade vest with four pockets and an embroidered logo of the P.F. Squad on the back, alongside rufous army cargo pants tucked into her rosewood paratrooper boots. She wears a right-side drop leg holster for her handgun, along with a gold-buckled dark mossy green belt that holds her tonfa and has a sheath for her combat knife. She wore the same sash that her Rebel Army outfit currently sports.

Over her T-shirt, she wears a Soldier Plate Carrier System (SPCS) with a MultiCam pattern, which carries her walkie-talkie and ammo for other firearms. She has a malachite waist pack secured at the back of her belt, storing ammunition for her handgun. Additionally, she wears two black bandoliers that cross in an X-shape: the right one holds multiple throwing daggers, while the left one carries explosive shells for her Anti-Tank Rifle. Sagan carries a rufous load-bearing backpack containing camping equipment, tactical explosives, portable ammo boxes, a canteen full of water, a Gatling Shot, a Shotgun, and a Rocket Launcher.

She temporarily wore a drill instructor outfit, which she has kept as a personal trophy to commemorate her accomplishments during the Survival Island Occupation. The outfit consists of black knee pads, a pair of spike-soled seal brown combat boots, and a boonie hat with a woodland Flecktarn camouflage pattern and an auburn adjustable chin strap. She wears an olivine sleeveless shirt and earth yellow army cargo shorts that fall just above her knees. Her cargo shorts are held up by a gold-buckled phthalo green belt that has a tight strap compartment that securely holds her black riding crop with a burgundy handle when not in use. She dons a military jacket with a woodland Flecktarn camouflage pattern, two breast pockets, short sleeves with tea green cuffs, a golden eight-button front with the top button unbuttoned, and a Johnny collar. She wears a shoulder-length light brown wig with gentle curls and wispy bangs that cover her eyebrows.

For all of her outfits, she wears a madder red tank top that exposes her stomach and a Prussian blue bra with Chantilly lace and panties. She wears a round cabochon-cut emerald labret piercing and a turquoise-hued nose piercing with gilded lines that's a slightly slimmer version of Xochiquetzal's nose plug. She dons earrings that feature medium-sized golden hoops, a large circular bone bead, and blue-green tassels. For her Rebel Army and P.F. Squad outfits, she carries a blue-green duffle bag containing extra portable ammo boxes, Stielhandgranate, pineapple grenades, smoke bombs, a sheathed obsidian knife, a cat o’ nine tails tipped with metal barbs, a bottle of diuretics, two lipsticks, eyeliner, a small makeup brush, an eyeshadow palette, a square green gold blush compact with a built-in mirror, pepper spray, condoms, a couple of cans of cherry vanilla soda, and jewellery she isn’t wearing while on duty. It carries hand-sized chunks of her favourite rocks and minerals: carbonatite, kimberlite containing a couple of translucent white diamonds, litchfieldite, a unakite pebble, jadeite, sodalite, and pyrite.

It also includes a multicoloured ballpoint pen (black, red, orange, blue, and pink) and an emerald leather-bound journal with gold-trimmed pages and a blue-green ribbon marker. She uses the journal to contain her herbarium collection, record her unfiltered thoughts on current situations she finds herself in, and keep notes on acquaintances and important details. Once the Rebel Army is established and she joins, she uses the duffle bag to carry the keys to the Shoe, extra food rations and weapons for her platoon, and rolling bombs. It also carries a plastic bag full of weed joints, three boxes of cigarettes, an iridescent black lighter, and her golden bracers whenever she isn’t wearing them. She also keeps a supply of alcohol, hallucinogenic drugs, modafinil, Pervitin, cocaine, and fenethylline on hand for her platoon whenever they require pharmaceuticals and stimulants.

She often wears bold golden-brown double-winged eyeliner, sunset blush on her cheeks, glittery, smoky pinkish-orange eyeshadow with light purple blended in the centre, and shimmering dark scarlet lipstick edged with a seamless blend of old mauve.

When off-duty, she wears some jewellery, which is mostly inherited from her mother. Around her neck, she wears a braided camelid cord necklace that she made as a young child, featuring an Aztec-style turquoise jaguar's head centrepiece that faces downward with a snarling expression. The centrepiece is flanked by two circular bone beads, one on each side, four amethyst rondelle beads, two on each side, and six jade lentil beads, three on each side. A single resplendent quetzal tail feather protrudes from the amethyst beads. She wears another necklace, which is made from a cotton cord and features square sodalite beads. She wears three golden rings on her left hand: an upside-down triangle-cut fire opal ring on her pinky finger; a horizontally-set, rectangular rose pink rhodochrosite ring on her ring finger; and a marquise-cut red aventurine ring on her middle finger. She doesn’t wear any jewellery when donning her drill instructor outfit for disguise and stealth purposes.

She owns the only known Anti-Tank Rifle in existence, a large sniper rifle that fires a penetrating explosive shot. Its ammunition consists of explosive shells resembling 12-gauge red shotgun shells with a pineapple-like texture, which provide very strong firepower. Although it can rapidly fire three shots at a time, its rate of fire is relatively slow. The rifle features a black sling and a gradient colour scheme, transitioning from saffron-yellow at the rear to crimson at the front.

She owns the Shoe, a super-heavy tank that launches missiles from a ramp. The tank features pumpkin orange stripes and a black finish. However, she'll repaint it with a more camouflage-like finish if the situation requires stealthier measures.

Character summary: As a lustful person, she enjoys indulging her sexual desires, especially after a difficult or draining day at work, and her mind is often filled with erotic thoughts and fantasies. She tends to engage in sexual activity as a maladaptive coping mechanism to escape emotional pain and distress as well as to seek validation. She loves to flirt shamelessly with those who pique her interest, lavishing them with sincere praise and compliments. She isn't afraid to seduce people with the promise of sexual gratification, even if she doesn't intend to follow through it. Sagan strategically engages in sexual relationships, particularly when it helps with disarming adversaries, acquiring confidential information, and breeding loyalty. However, she maintains a strict personal boundary, refusing any involvement with sex offenders because she finds them disgusting and irredeemable.

She enjoys playfully teasing others, but she knows when to stop, respecting people's boundaries and outspoken feelings. While she's unapologetically confident and promiscuous, she prioritises consent and values the importance of respecting others' limits. Whenever she has a hangover or is preoccupied with her latest intimate encounter, she tends to run late or not have enough time to prepare for important meetings. She doesn't care about physical appearance, but she does have a personal preference for two types of men: those who are strong and have rigid muscles as they remind her of the statues of Greek gods; and those who are slender or heavier-set as she finds them adorably pathetic.

She secretly has an interest in women, particularly those she finds beautiful and feisty or sweet and adorable. However, she feels uncertain about how to approach the idea of becoming romantically and sexually involved with women, especially given Logan's past struggles with homophobia from their parents and strangers who took advantage of him. She keeps her sapphic desire a secret, not wanting to face the potential homophobia and biphobia that could harm her mental well-being. It doesn't help that she has openly presented herself as heterosexual, leading her to fear that many of the men who care for her and have been sexually intimate with her might be shocked and could potentially distance themselves if she were to come out as bisexual.

She's physically affectionate, freely giving kisses and embraces because she wants the people she genuinely cares about to know that she's approachable and worthy of attentive love. However, she also uses physical touch, often of a sensual nature, to purposefully disarm her opponents. She genuinely enjoys the warmth of human connection, finding comfort and a sense of vitality in it. She has a tendency to play coy and feign innocence, particularly when pretending to be friendly and sweet towards those she opposes. It's also a way for her to deny knowledge of or involvement in something she's actually aware of or has done. She's perceptive enough to recognize manipulation and has the confidence to address it directly. She appreciates it when men treat her with gentlemanly courtesy because she values respect and enjoys being treated like a real lady. Like Logan, she's pleasantly kind, polite, and approachable, yet she can also be rude and distant when the situation calls for it. She tends to act impulsively and sometimes makes poor judgments, which can give her the impression of being moronic, awkward, and careless.

She's a generous individual capable of showing genuine concern and compassion for those who are clearly in mental anguish. She's often shocked and in disbelief when someone reveals that they've endured many terrible situations. She often treats traumatised individuals who never wanted to be forced into war, survive in brutal ways or fight for a cause they didn't believe in with empathy and maternal concern. While she can easily escalate a situation for her own amusement, she knows when to act with kindness and seriousness. However, she reassures those she's trying to comfort that it's not her place to impose her understanding on them; that's for them to determine, and she knows she's incapable of changing crucial decisions like that. She conceals her emotional intelligence behind an overconfident and distant exterior, revealing it only to those she genuinely cares about and understands. She finds it abhorrent how some people prey on innocent and naive children, abuse the mentally ill, and force young individuals into the military. She could never hurt a child or young person who was forced to fight, even if she were told to do so.

She struggles with unresolved trauma, atypical depression, occasional suicidal thoughts, mild anger management issues, body dysmorphia, and bulimia nervosa. She uses binge eating and purging as a coping mechanism to manage the emotional pain stemming from her past trauma. This behaviour is also driven by a need to control her body and attain her idealised self-image. Furthermore, she grapples with a negative body image, obsessing over her physical appearance and striving for beauty, despite receiving affirmations of her attractiveness. She avoids mirrors because her reflection triggers intense insecurities, causing her to perceive herself as repulsive. In extreme cases, this self-loathing can be overwhelming, leading to vomiting and breaking mirrors. However, she's comfortable looking at her eyes and lips in a small mirror because those are the parts of herself she isn't insecure about. Additionally, she has a quick temper and is prone to angry outbursts, often resorting to crass insults, fierce retorts, and sudden violence when faced with minor frustrations or difficult people and situations she strongly dislikes. These episodes can be challenging for her to calm down from, often leaving her feeling remorseful afterwards.

Although she identifies as a sadomasochist, her tendencies lean more towards masochism. She has a strong desire to experience intense sensations to satisfy her burning arousal, but she sometimes uses it as a means of self-punishment for feelings of guilt and shame. Additionally, she often craves attention and sometimes acts impulsively to receive it, driven by a deep-seated need for validation and cherishment. Sagan struggles with chronic feelings of loneliness and misery, which she often attempts to ignore through substance abuse, excessive partying, and reckless promiscuity. She isn't fond of situations that make her feel sexually uncomfortable and hates being rudely insulted or treated as a mere object. She has difficulty expressing her genuine emotions, so she tends to keep them private and records them in her journal.

She's a bluntly honest and fiercely independent leader who doesn't worry about hurting the feelings of people she doesn't care about, often blurting out crude and brash remarks. However, she's more considerate when telling the truth to her loved ones. When dealing with adversaries, she can be fiercely intimidating, using aggressive tactics and harsh language to assert her dominance and manipulate them to do her bidding. She's notorious for following through on her death threats and getting rid of cowards and traitors, going as far as to shoot at and cut the throats of any treacherous and cowardly soldier in her platoon, order violent physical punishments or brutally maim them by removing one of their external organs. She recruits new people through a combination of seductive charm, blackmailing, and ideological persuasion, often appealing to their unique worldviews and exploiting their vulnerabilities. She finds amusement in watching others squirm and face serious humiliation and physical pain, and derives genuine pleasure from outmaneuvering her opponents.

As an outwardly brave hothead, Sagan has a thirst for adventure, living life on the edge and reveling in the rush of excitement that comes with it. She's a cunning, watchful, and relentlessly stubborn loudmouth, being slow to forgive and quick to challenge others. She often exhibits malice, delivering scathing criticism and maintaining a cold distance towards those she distrusts and dislikes intensely. She can seamlessly shift from warm and charming to utterly ruthless in an instant, her pleasant demeanour sometimes remaining eerily unchanged. She meticulously keeps detailed mental notes on the vulnerabilities of those around her, facilitating effortless manipulation when opportunities arise. Sagan takes pride in effortlessly "cleaning up" sensitive issues, such as treachery, that could compromise the Rebel Army's plans.

She has a tendency to ramble about her life, even when it's troubling or embarrassing, make off-color jokes with dark humour and sexual undertones, and request specific foods she craves, especially when she's intoxicated. When she's drunk or wants to annoy her twin half-brother, she likes to sing Katy Perry, Nessa Barrett, MARINA, and P!ink songs at the top of her lungs. She kisses her favourite rocks before every battle as a good luck charm, seeking victory and favourable weather. She sometimes sleeps with her thumb in her mouth, a subconscious longing for the innocence and unconditional love of her childhood when she was showered with genuine warmth and affection by her mother. Sagan is deeply proud of her heritage and refuses to let dehumanising insults and opinions diminish her sense of self-worth. She has no tolerance for jealous and possessive men, abhorring the feeling of being owned and believing that life is too precious to be squandered on toxic resentment and bitter grudges.

She recognizes that true power stems from controlling information rather than merely holding authority. She views the world as a chessboard where most individuals are pawns to be maneuvered. She perceives herself as a crucial agent for change and the most effective weapon in General Morden's strategic arsenal. She fully supports General Morden's vision for a New World, convinced that authoritarian control is necessary and that democracy is inherently flawed and ineffective.

She deeply admires her platoon for their unwavering loyalty to the Rebel Army's cause, even if it means making the ultimate sacrifice to protect confidential information. She finds it intriguing how some are willing to risk everything or charge headfirst into battle on her command, no matter the strategy. She takes pleasure in the gifts they confidently give her, especially the severed heads of their enemies and traitorous Rebels, which demonstrate how deeply devoted they are to eliminating threats to the Rebel Army's power and ambitions. She always finds it endearing when they give her chocolates and flowers on Valentine's Day. She feels obligated to reciprocate their gestures, often in the form of sexually intimate favours, sharing illicit substances, and fine liquor. At times, she showers them with praise and approval or gives them gentle, affectionate kisses. She proudly showcases the gifts they give her in her bedroom, while storing and prominently displaying the alcohol in a glass-front cabinet and the severed heads in jars of preservative fluid in her private office.

She was once close friends with Gimlet, often playfully teasing him with platonic kisses and jokes laced with sexual innuendo. Despite their falling out after she betrayed the Regular Army and revealed her Rebel allegiance, she harbours a desire to mend their fractured friendship. Knowing he's unlikely to forgive her, Sagan remains doubtful of reconciliation, yet still occasionally wonders how he's doing.

She's deeply devoted to her twin half-brother, Logan, and their unbreakable bond has seen them through countless challenges, always supporting each other in times of need. She tries to help Logan with various problems, but her methods are sometimes misguided or counterproductive. She often playfully teases him about his good looks and his poor sense of direction when he's lost in the wilderness. She encourages him to take pride in his heritage instead of allowing shame to define him. She often has to hide her food from him because he loves to devour her leftovers and treats in secret, especially if she has ice cream lying around. Things often escalate into lively arguments because Logan enjoys teasing her by playfully disregarding her wishes, deliberately pushing her buttons. When he really tests her patience, she's not above engaging in an aggressive, violent wrestle to set him straight.

Besides this, she often sticks by Logan's side through thick and thin, whether they're on a mission together or off-duty. Her deep-seated fear of losing him under unfair circumstances drives her to be overprotective because he represents her main connection to humanity. She'll stop at nothing to keep him safe, even if it means putting her own well-being at risk. She's aware of his doubts about the Rebel Army's plans, specifically whether they'll succeed in rooting out corruption, and if General Morden's methods are becoming too extreme, but she keeps his concerns confidential. Although she strongly disagrees with his concerns, she acknowledges the possibility that the Rebel Army's plans may end in total failure. However, she chooses to remain silent on the matter because she doesn't want to risk damaging their bond, harming Logan's mental health, and tarnishing his good reputation within the Rebel Army.

She looks up to General Morden as a positive paternal figure, wishing he was her and Logan's father. She deeply admires his charisma, competent leadership, and dedication to his soldiers' well-being. General Morden serves as a trusted mentor, providing valuable life advice and tactical guidance whenever she seeks it. She enjoys sharing a few drinks and going hunting with him. Like Logan, she's extremely protective of her older distant cousin and will stop at nothing to ensure his safety. She often fears the worst, recognizing that he is the key to holding the Rebel Army together. She has no patience for anyone who disrespects him and strongly opposes his vision for a New World.

She loves to shamelessly flirt and tease Abul Abbas, reveling in his flustered reactions to her playful attitude. She finds his attempts to woo her with luxurious gifts and promises of fancy night outs to be amusing. Although she doesn't think he's the worst person in the Rebel Army and finds him tolerable for the most part, she understands why many people despise him. She isn't afraid to give him a stern and angry earful when the situation calls for it, especially when he's being a major distraction or has botched a perfectly good plan devised by her, Logan and/or General Morden.

Backstory: Xochiquetzal Wildgrube was born on October 31, 1993 in the isolated forests between Oberammergau and Munich in Bavaria, Germany. The Wildgrube family has a long history of exploration, military service, and pioneering achievements. Wildgrube soldiers were recognized for their tactical brilliance, fierce belligerence, and extraordinary bravery, leaving a lasting impact from the forests of Prussia to the shores of the Mediterranean. Wildgrube explorers were well-known cartographers who contributed significantly to the creation of accurate maps of Central Europe.

In the 18th century, the Wildgrube family made significant contributions to forestry and land management, developing sustainable hunting grounds and forest management systems. On their estates, the Wildgrubes developed a system of underground food cellars and storage spaces, which enabled them to become important traders during harsh winters. This encouraged the wealthy family to venture into the merchant business, establishing extensive trade connections across Central Europe and the Far East. Through carefully cultivated professional relationships and strategic marriages, the Wildgrubes became influential intermediaries in international trade.

Miyahuaxochtzin, a member of the Nina Runakuna ("fire people" in Quechua), and Rochus, the last descendant of the Wildgrube family, got married and became officially involved in a business venture together. Her company formed an agreement with the German corporation he worked for to process farmed materials into sustainable textiles. However, he began making business-related decisions without her input or consent. Over time, Rochus began to reveal a controlling side. He attempted to dictate her life, hoping to keep her with him forever and alleviate his fear of losing her. He heavily restricted her movements, insisting she remain close to him. He also controlled her friendships, limiting her to relatives and coworkers he knew personally, and manipulated her career choices to ensure they benefited him and their business. The lack of transparency and extreme restrictions led Miyahuaxochtzin to develop feelings of betrayal, mistrust, resentment, and a desire for autonomy.

Feeling trapped in a loveless marriage and mistreated by Rochus, Miyahuaxochtzin escaped from the castle and fled to Munich, seeking temporary refuge. During her time apart from him, she pursued excitement and passion, seeking a distraction from the suffocating stresses of her restrictive relationship. In a bold moment of clarity, she devised the ultimate revenge against her husband: a deliberate, carefully calculated affair. This was designed not only to inflict emotional pain on Rochus but also to rekindle the romantic spark she had been desperately craving.

During this time, she encountered a sci-fi author and university botany professor of Polish-Welsh descent, who took her under his wing while she was lost, alone, and exhausted, wandering the streets of Munich. They had a one-night stand, and she left him a day later. The Polish-Welsh man had fathered one of Miyahuaxochtzin’s children, a baby girl named Xochiquetzal. Notably, Xochiquetzal and her twin half-brother, Xochipilli, were the result of heteropaternal superfecundation. Rochus was horrified to discover that his wife had been unfaithful to him with two different men, making him increasingly manipulative and overprotective of her. The fact that he wasn't the biological father of her children only added to his bitterness, leading him to harbour a deep-seated resentment towards them. Despite this, he attempted to conceal his true feelings behind a facade of false fatherly affection.

Her parents had a volatile relationship, marked by heated arguments that frequently escalated into physical altercations, and Rochus often responded with temper tantrums. Beyond these conflicts and the stresses of work, Miyahuaxochtzin's parenting style fluctuated between excessive attentiveness and neglect. Despite her outward affection for her children, she frequently sought escape from her marital difficulties by leaving the house to engage in partying, excessive alcohol consumption, and infidelity.

When Miyahuaxochtzin was home, she adorned Xochiquetzal in beautiful embroidered dresses and fine jewellery, styled her hair, educated her about the Nina Runakuna, taught her Quechua and Nahuatl, and shared stories of Aztec and Inca myths. Upon returning home and finding her daughter distressed, she always offered comfort, berated her stepfather, ensured she was well-fed, and engaged her in exploring nature and traditionally feminine handicrafts like weaving, embroidery, and jewellery making. This maternal attention, while loving, was sometimes so all-consuming that Xochiquetzal had limited time to spend with Xochipilli. She felt pressured by her mother to be the perfect woman, and she didn't appreciate her nosiness. Her mother always wanted to know every detail: what she did at school, her plans for the weekend, her activities with Xochipilli, and how she spent her free time.

While Miyahuaxochtzin was away, Rochus neglected Xochiquetzal, denying her attention, parental guidance, and even sustenance. He saw her as a painful reminder of her mother, his unfaithful wife, due to their shared physical traits. He unfairly projected his misogynistic rage onto Xochiquetzal, using the same demeaning and hateful language he used against her mother. He frequently sought solace in luxury booze and remained preoccupied with his work. He forced her to perform chores around the Fortress of Königsdrache, and if her work was deemed unsatisfactory, she would be badly beaten and confined to her room for an entire day without food or water.

He imposed strict control over her actions and attire, seeking to suppress any hint of rebellion. He even required her to read Christian scripture regularly in an effort to make her more like-minded and enlightened, but he would sexually assaulted whenever she decided to refuse. He dictated how she dressed, fearing she would appear "slutty", and any perceived transgression resulted in harsh reprimands, dehumanising insults, and physical violence, including kicks to the ribs and blows to the face. To pretend he cared about her, he would give her every snake, dragon, and cat Ty Beanie Babies he could get his hands on whenever she successfully completed a chore.

One day, before her 11th birthday, Miyahuaxochtzin suddenly vanished from the lives of Xochiquetzal and Xochipilli. Rochus seemed unfazed by this disappearance and decided to rename Xochiquetzal as Sagan Roswitha Wildgrube. He also forced her and her twin half-brother into a more assimilated, Christianised way of living. Not much is known about this period of her life, but she did have the chance to fully connect with Logan. They spent a lot of time together, doing everything from playing marbles and taking peaceful strolls in Oberammergau to beating up bullies and helping each other with homework. Additionally, Rochus treated Sagan more like a boy, which made her uncomfortable and undermined her pride in her feminine identity. Despite this, she made an effort to appear more masculine as her stepfather had always desired a male child. Rochus was somewhat less abusive toward Sagan during this time, but he remained strict and harsh in his treatment of her, sometimes physically beating her, molesting her, and belittling her appearance.

At the age of 14, she dropped out of secondary school, packed some clothing, makeup, money, and basic essentials into her backpack, and ran away from home after discovering that her stepfather planned to place her in a secret eugenics program that performed illegal hysterectomies. She sought refuge in Munich when a local group of teenage and young adult bikers and jewel thieves, who lived on the margins of society, took her in. She would live with them in the slums of Munich for two years, enjoying the drug-filled orgies they threw, the excitement of their lives, and the attention they gave her. They showered her with romantic compliments, physical affection, promises of forbidden pleasures, and gifts of stolen jewellery and clothing she wanted to wear. She was sexually involved with the leader of the gang and his second-in-command, who treated her like property. She participated in some of their illicit activities, including planning drug trafficking routes to evade law enforcement and assassinating threats to their illegal operations, sometimes by posing as a sex worker.

With her consent, a couple of the jewel thieves staged the assassinated death of her stepfather to resemble a suicide by gunshot. After this event, they began to treat her more like a soldier and displayed behaviour that was borderline misogynistic at times, making her feel uncomfortable, terrified, and betrayed. After some stealthy investigating, she discovered they were working for a mysterious organisation she had heard stories about from Logan. He had recounted tales of their mother's life and how her people were enslaved by a cult with paramilitary forces called the Serapion Fellowship. She packed her belongings, stole a couple of their weapons, and fled from Munich at the first opportunity, returning to her home city in a panic.

During her desperate escape, Sagan committed larceny by stealing a package containing food but was caught by a male police officer who was on neighborhood watch. She was placed in juvenile detention and interrogated by the officer who apprehended her, during which she explained how she ended up in her unfortunate situation and how much she deeply missed her twin half-brother. He recognized her family name and realized she was the girl who had suddenly vanished from Rochus' home. With his assistance, she was reunited with Logan and learned that they had been admitted into the Regular Army’s orphan program after German law enforcement informed them about the perilous situation involving the two Wildgrube teenagers and the assassination of Rochus. With Logan's emotional support and the Regular Army's educational and financial assistance, she was able to rebuild her life. At the age of 16, she felt motivated to join the Peregrine Falcons Squad’s cadet program, hoping to protect others from the evils of the world and contribute to a brighter future.

When the Phantom Strike was still serving as the Regular Army’s main mercenary branch, she met Lieutenant Colonel Macba after turning 18. Macba emotionally manipulated her into dating him, deliberately taking things slow to control the pace of the relationship. He employed tactics like lovebombing, showering her with excessive attention and gifts, and offering consensual physical affection. As a result, she spent increasing amounts of time with Macba, often accompanying him after work and unintentionally drifting apart from Logan. When Logan attempted to warn her about Macba's intentions, she would become defensive and argumentative, blinded by her strong feelings for Macba. Macba's control over her was marked by sadistic physical and sexual abuse. This abuse led her to associate pain with sexual arousal, resulting in masochistic tendencies, and left lasting physical marks, including her curved scar and patch of scarred tissue above the buttocks.

At the age of 20, Macba abruptly disappeared from her life, leaving her emotionally devastated and isolated. Before he left, she became pregnant, feeling both thrilled and terrified at the prospect of motherhood. However, the pregnancy ended in miscarriage. The experience was so overwhelming that she decided to get her tubes tied, vowing never to go through that again.

She reunited with Logan shortly after her breakup and, still reeling from the loss, became overly reliant on him. Over the next two years, they participated in several missions together, during which time she developed strong romantic feelings for him. She also behaved inappropriately with her twin half-brother, becoming flirtatious and making unwanted advances. However, she stopped after he angrily rejected her attempt to sleep with him.

In the hopes of making her more independent and less reliant on her twin half-brother, the Regular Army high command assigned her to a mission with Tequila in Russian territory. Their objective was to dismantle a human trafficking ring allegedly supported by influential politicians. She used her tactical brilliance and seduction skills to gather intelligence and neutralise the politicians, while Tequila and his team focused on eliminating the criminal operatives and rescuing the hostages and children at risk of trafficking. Once the mission was over, Tequila gave his tonfa to Sagan as a symbol of recognition and respect, referring to her as a "strange lady". They formed a strong friendship while enjoying a brief break in the Siberian wilderness. Seeking comfort and attention, she confided in him about her past relationship with Macba. He then shared his insight that Macba's behaviour towards her had been abusive, suggesting that his actions weren't driven by genuine love. Consumed by rightful anger and a thirst for revenge, she vowed to destroy Macba.

One time, when Sagan discovered that Logan's team might've been fed false intel about a corrupt politician and a sex ring, she went rogue and gathered information without proper authorization, secretly accessing classified data. She even managed to get herself assigned as a last-minute replacement communications specialist for his mission after seducing a higher-up to secure the position. She shared the information with Logan to assist with the operation, but it turned out to be misleading and overly complicated, leading them to be ambushed by a criminal mercenary group hired by the politician, forcing them to abandon the mission and wasting months of planning. Sagan got into a bitter argument with Logan's twin half-brother and accidentally hurt his feelings by calling him a "soft, stupidly privileged fucktard with lacking leadership skills". This caused him to socially and professionally distance himself from her for a couple of months while she faced reprimands from her superiors for ruining the mission and worked to carefully rebuild her somewhat tarnished reputation. They eventually reconciled after Sagan admitted her faults, and she began to feel lonely without him.

She learned about Gimlet's recent escapades through Tequila and Red Eye, who shared stories of his troublesome behaviour. Intrigued, she persuaded Logan to join her in paying Gimlet a visit while they were vacationing in the Bahamas. She attempted to push the awkward memories of their recent one-night stand aside by focusing on teaching Gimlet the art of throwing daggers.

The beginning of the Arms Deal Barrage involved Sagan and Logan with minimal assistance from Gimlet, Red Eye, and Tequila. Their primary objective was to infiltrate the material distribution centre, capture Colonel Hilde Garn and Lieutenant Colonel Macba. Meanwhile, Gimlet, Red Eye, and Tequila focused on gathering intelligence on Serapion Fellowship operations and repelling enemy soldiers when necessary. Sagan and Logan collaborated on several key objectives, including destroying the Ptolemaic VTOL, pursuing a transport train carrying weapons and Intelligence Agency hostages, and rescuing prisoners from a prison camp after Sagan's SV-000 was destroyed and she was subsequently captured. During a jungle flight, her Slug Flyer was crushed by an incline, forcing her to eject. She infiltrated a near-labyrinthine Serapion Fellowship base and escaped, joining Logan, who had recovered an SV-000 after defeating Macba. Driven by a desire for revenge, Sagan relentlessly pursued Macba, often taking direct routes in her search. Upon locating him within the main facility, she aggressively confronted him, culminating in a fierce battle that she ultimately won.

With her initial objective complete, Sagan was offered the opportunity to withdraw from the mission. However, she chose to remain, driven by a desire to suppress the knowledge of the Regular Army's corruption and earn Morden's respect by demonstrating her dedication and courage. From this point forward, Sagan and Logan primarily supported Gimlet, Red Eye, and Tequila, intervening only when absolutely necessary. Sagan often engaged with Serapion Fellowship cultists and paramilitary soldiers, using sexual favours as a means to gather valuable intelligence on enemy operations before neutralising them. She also prioritised rescuing any overlooked hostages and, upon learning of Macba's survival, resumed her pursuit of him.

Once the bombardment on the Serapion Fellowship fortress ceased, she chased Macba, who was attempting a swift escape, into the building. She fell into a trap in a dimly lit mining area, where Macba ambushed her, taking her hostage and dragging her into an elevator leading to a power facility. Inside the elevator, he attempted to sexually assault Sagan, touching her inappropriately and trying to kiss her. She fought back desperately and was rescued by her twin half-brother, Gimlet, Red Eye, and Tequila before the assault could escalate. After navigating the lowest level of the trolley area alone, she confronted Macba again. Their vicious battle nearly ended with him overpowering her, but she managed to cut his stomach open and shoot him between the eyes, securing her victory.

Eight months prior to the Central Park bombing, she became romantically involved with a high-ranking officer in the Regular Army who admired her. This high-ranking officer was named Lohengram, a charming military genius and brooding political idealist. He was close to the Chief of the Regular Army and held the positions of Lieutenant Commander of the Marine Corps and Assault Captain of the Asian Garrison. Through their relationship, Sagan often accompanied Lohengram to social gatherings hosted by the Chief of the Regular Army or President Marx. These events provided her with opportunities to overhear conversations that reinforced her suspicions of corruption within the Regular Army. They often engaged in sexual activities at his private suite in China and several luxurious love hotels in Japan. However, he exhibited controlling behaviour, dictating her attire, speech, and eating habits. He also kept her under close surveillance, personally observing her and enlisting close friends to monitor her. His goal was to obtain nude photographs, which he intended to use for potential blackmail, ensuring she wouldn't expose the Regular Army.

Lohengram would often rudely insult Sagan if she didn't dress the way he wanted and refused his advances, using derogatory language that targeted her appearance. However, she had been plotting her revenge since the third month of their relationship after discovering the nude photos he kept of her in the secret office of his private suite. While he was briefly out of his suite, she seized the opportunity. A quick search through his contact book, a who's who of powerful figures and hired killers, led her to Oghma. She provided the assassin with Lohengram's suite number and a detailed schedule of his likely activities. Later, after another sexual encounter, Lohengram was shot in the head, collapsing onto a naked Sagan. She then meticulously staged the scene as a suicide, placing his pistol precisely where he'd fallen. Shortly after this incident, she dyed her hair and got tattoos and piercings as a way to cope and leave her tumultuous past behind, hoping to feel more beautiful and confident while still honouring her cultural heritage.

Morden, on the verge of deserting the Regular Army, recruited Sagan and Logan to help him establish an organisation dedicated to overthrowing corrupt government and military powers. While Sagan, having been personally mistreated by a superior officer, was eager to leave the Regular Army behind entirely, she ultimately agreed to serve as a double agent due to a deal Logan had made with Morden. She was promoted to Major General by her distant older cousin. While the Rebel Army was being established and funded, Sagan gathered intelligence by cultivating brief sexual relationships with high-ranking officers in the Regular Army. She used her sexual charm and military influence to gain their trust, extracting information about their operations.

She secured funding for the Rebel Army's weapons and tanks by manipulating President Marx into providing support after a brief sexual encounter, and also participated in a global drug trafficking ring to raise additional funds. She expanded the Rebel Army's ranks by recruiting from emerging terrorist groups, offering them a sense of belonging and purpose while exploiting their vulnerabilities with promises of sexual favours. She even received a new outfit and her own personal tank, the Shoe, as surprise gifts from General Morden and her newly assembled platoon, who had grown to dearly love her.

A year before the Great Morden War, she caught Tarma's attention with flirtation, exchanging a couple of kisses and sharing a few beers with him. After their night out together, he introduced her to Marco, whom she quickly bonded with after complimenting his intelligence. She would later befriend Eri and Fio over pastries, sharing life stories and telling bad jokes. She received a gift from Tarma, who admired her professional tactical knowledge and fierce fighting skills. It was the Anti-Tank Rifle, which he had spent three months building from scratch. He hoped she would like it and taught her how to wield it, also providing her with the blueprints in case she needed to repair it if it ever got damaged. Sagan ended up loving the rifle, which became her main weapon from then on.

During the Great Morden War, she secretly aided the Rebel troops by providing them with supplies, including weapons, food rations, alcohol, and stimulants. She also gathered intelligence on the current positions and activities of Marco's team, which she then passed on to General Morden. Her other activities included maintaining the Shoe, taking frequent smoke breaks with her twin half-brother, eliminating Regular spies, and making love with her assigned Rebel troops. When Rebel engineers created replicas of the original Shoe and Karn tanks, she assigned Torquil and Ferdinand as pilots. This decision was motivated by her desire to conceal her and Logan's true allegiance. While Torquil and Ferdinand survived, they were ultimately forced by Marco and Tequila to give up information on the Rebel Army's location.

As Marco's team were about to depart Gerhardt City after defeating the Iron Nokana, General Morden launched his ambush. Sagan initiated the attack, firing her Anti-Tank Rifle and creating a blinding explosion that nearly killed Gimlet. With the assistance of Logan and her large group of surviving troops from her platoon, mainly consisting of fanatics, bazooka wielders, and shielded soldiers, she managed to corner Marco's team in a ravaged butcher shop, forcing them to surrender. After Marco's team was captured, she, Logan, and a group of Rebel soldiers went into hiding at a partially constructed Rebel base in Siberia. They awaited the opportune moment to resurface and execute their pre-arranged plan to rescue General Morden. When the Pipovulaj located the remnants of the Rebel Army, she was intrigued by the Martians' offer of an alliance for world domination. She readily agreed to assist them in freeing Morden from prison.

During Morden's second coup, when the Monoeyes' arrival infected a small handful of Rebel Infantrymen, she grew fond of them, treating them like adorable, clumsy children and showering them with plenty of physical affection to motivate them. In an effort to stall Marco's team, Sagan ordered her soldiers to use a Double-Decker Bus to block the path to the dry creek. They also stationed a Ferry Boat and set up wells for rocket divers to use in the dry creek. Despite lacking proper experience, Sagan piloted the Big Shiee, but ultimately lost the battle against Marco's team. Fortunately, she was rescued just in time by the Rebel Army's special forces and a contingent of Pipovulaj troops, narrowly avoiding death from the explosions and falling debris within the Big Shiee.

In New Godokin City, she hosted a massive party in an abandoned shopping mall for her platoon to unwind before their impending battle with Marco's team. However, the celebration got out of hand, and she became intoxicated, sharing intimate moments with a couple of her closest soldiers. Unbeknownst to her, Marco's team had already arrived in New Godokin City, aided by Hyakutaro and Division 6. They were closing in on the mutated soldiers the Rebel Army was desperately trying to conceal from the outside world. As a result, she and her platoon were caught off guard by Division 6 and their reinforcements, led by Rumi. Due to her intoxication, she was unfit for battle and forced to flee, relying on the timely arrival of more Rebel troops who provided crucial support to her platoon. Their assistance allowed her to escape, narrowly avoiding elimination. The incident left her with a humiliating and regrettable experience that would haunt her for the rest of her life.

She aided Morden's soldiers in guarding the front entrance of the Rebel Army's Siberian base, piloting her Shoe tank to gain an advantage. However, the Shoe was badly damaged, and she exited the tank, preparing to engage Eri, who had destroyed it with grenades. Before she could act, Marco intervened, fatally slashing her throat and decapitating her. According to reports from the troops who witnessed the event, Marco displayed her head as a warning to surviving Rebel soldiers, forcing them to surrender in fear. Through Doctor Amadeus' intervention, her digital consciousness was transferred into a custom-made cyborg body. This resurrection fueled a deep-seated hatred for Marco, leaving her feeling humiliated by her gruesome demise. She vowed to exact revenge, seeking to make Marco experience a similar fate.

Following the plan for the Rebel Army's revenge attack, which she helped plan, she disguised herself as a drill instructor. She made the cadets she trained feel empowered and relatively safe. Unlike Allen, who had a harsh but encouraging persona, she adopted a softer and gentler approach with a ruthless and cynical edge. After work, she would sometimes flirt with the male cadets over drinks or join the female cadets for smoke breaks. She mainly stayed behind the scenes, focusing on tactical planning and allowing her twin half-brother to showcase his combat prowess. This also gave him a much-needed break from the constant demands of planning. Additionally, she ensured that the Rebel Infantrymen and cadets were well-equipped and supplied.

She attempted to brainwash the P'isqu Runakuna ("bird people" in Quechua) into collaborating with the Rebel Army, eliminating the cadets and other resistance forces using methods of their choice. However, this alliance was short-lived. After Dilovar broke free, he rallied the P'isqu Runakuna to fight against the Rebel forces, who had planned to eliminate the native population in order to minimise resistance against their regime in the South Pacific archipelago. Upon learning of Logan's death, she prematurely activated the Cabracan, triggering minor earth tremors that caught the surviving cadets and Division 6 off guard. While they were distracted by the Cabracan, she called for rescue and dragged Allen's reviving body to a hidden helipad. Morden's Hi-Do helicopter arrived just in time, allowing her to escape.

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himejoshikomaeda · 1 year ago

Text

LES FOISFOIS FAVORITE SONG FROM EACH TOUHOU SOUNDTRACK

th01 highly responsive to prayers: gotta be eternal shrine maiden. angel’s legend is good, but eternal shrine maiden just has what the PC-98’s soundboard did best. little beeps and boops that somehow sound so chock-full of emotion. fantastic stuff.

th02 story of eastern wonderland: love-colored magic is, of course, legendary, but my favorite for this game is complete darkness. absolutely masterfully work with that melody.

th03 phantasmagoria of dim.dream: obligatory respects to strawberry crisis to make sure i don’t get mauled for saying this, but reincarnation is my personal favorite off this soundtrack. there isn’t really a place to note this, but the SC-8850 version of reincarnation is fucking phenomenal, too.

th04 lotus land story: blah blah blah bad apple okay no but seriously it’s maiden’s capriccio. that’s reimu’s theme. i don’t care about this mystic oriental love consultation shit, this spring path crap. maiden’s capriccio. the imperishable night version fucks hard too.

th05 mystic square: this one is really hard. romantic children rules. plastic mind is unreal. the grimoire of alice fucks. but the best one in my opinion is alice in wonderland. extra stage themes tend to be really good, but i looooooove this one.

th06 embodiment of scarlet devil: locked girl ~ the girl’s sealed room. again being a contrarian here and not picking UN owen was her. cuz. i dunno. i like it.. be nice to me.. side note, but i love how the instruments in eosd and dolls in pseudo paradise sound.. idk, out of tune? it’s nice.

th07 perfect cherry blossom: there are a lot of really good ones here but i’d be lying if i said it wasn’t necrofantasia, contrarian though i may usually be.

th08 imperishable night: i don’t knowwww this one’s too hard they’re all so good.. illusionary night ~ ghostly eyes, nostalgic blood of the east ~ old world, flight of the bamboo cutter ~ lunatic princess, and extend ash ~ person of hourai all come to mind, but honestly i think i have to give it to love-colored master spark. i know it’s not “from” this game but it’s my favorite on the soundtrack, sooooo.. whatever. my list.

th09 phantasmagoria of flower view: wind god girl. “that’s from shoot the bullet” i knowwww shut upppp i’m not doing side games.

th10 mountain of faith: faith is for the transient people, full stop. the gensokyo the gods loved is practically the “touhou theme” to me, but sanae’s theme is like. in my top 3 favorite songs in the series. those guitars kick ass. this game’s soundtrack is phenomenal.

th11 subterranean animism: green-eyed jealousy. followed closely by satori maiden ~ 3rd eye. literally every song on this game’s soundtrack is a banger. a real no-skip album. but i am fucking addicted to parsee’s theme. it’s like bitter, ugly crying as music. i can’t sing its praises enough.

th12 undefined fantastic object: this game sucks ass but the music’s good. emotional skyscraper ~ cosmic mind is the best song.

th13 ten desires: it’s shoutoku legend ~ true administrator, but i wanna give a shout-out to night sakura of dead spirits anyway, because it’s great.

th14 double dealing character: kobito of the shining needle ~ little princess. but i mean. i am kissing reverse ideology on the mouth with tongue. i love you seija i love you shimmy you’ll get ‘em next time

th15 legacy of lunatic kingdom: honestly? unforgettable, the nostalgic greenery. i love the spacey sound of this soundtrack, and none of them capture that sound better than that. the lake reflects the cleansed moonlight is good for the same reason. i have a lot of love for the sea that reflects one’s home planet, too.

th16 hidden star in four seasons: not huge on this soundtrack, but my favorite song is swim in a cherry blossom-colored sea.

th17 wily beast and weakest creature: electric heritage. what a tasty piano in this one. the gorgeous melody is also present in entrust this world to idols ~ idolatrize world, but i like the piano in electric heritage better. idolatrize world is an easy second, though.

th18 unconnected marketeers: this soundtrack is so romantic. very lovely melodies. my favorite is the perpetual snow of komakusa blossoms. it’s memorable to me for whatever reason.

th19 unfinished dream of all living ghost: i’m gonna choose to limit myself to the songs that aren’t covers of existing touhou songs, cuz some of them are pretty similar even if i might like them “more”, like corpse voyage ~ be of good cheer. so i’ll go with the deviants’ unobstructed light ~ kingdom of nothingness. the vocal samples are cool.

i’ll list my favorite songs from the doujin albums in a separate reblog, because damn this is getting long!!

#💘

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tassodelmiele · 1 year ago

Text

The Magic Whatever

I needed to put this chaos into concrete writing-something.

I know this would ended as a mess in my mind, with no possibilities to born.

So I write it.

And now I'll feel bad if I won't keep on with the story.

Hope you're having a nice day filled with chocolate-

Disclaimer: titles make no sense.

Have a nice day

....

Soap didn't die on that mission; not 'cause there was no gunshot.

Bullet just disappeared.

And he found who made the trick, bringing the whole team with him in a rabbit hole filled with dangerous stuff sprinkled in lusterdust and smelling blood-scent, crumbled in caramelized sugar and glazed madeleines.

'Cause Marigold just did what she does best: following her instinct. And that day she just stole the bullet flying toward Soap's head.

1- Only thing you can trust in the morning is to have your pajama still on

«You have to trust me»

You have to.

Sure.

As if there were other possibilities.

Anything could have done the work on that shitty morning, everything good enough to make the clock worth listening to: coffee's scent; pancake pan-fry's fizzle; a baseball bat in the middle of the forehead.

Anything but a geared man with a loaded gun rushing in the bedroom, making her remember that the whole load of fucks happened yesterday where just the cherry on top of a brown cake that didn't smell of chocolate.

Rushing upstairs became a stumble on every step; at the umpteenth shot hands ran on the ears and knees crumbled down, crouching the whole body on the floor.

I don't wanna die I don't wanna die I don't wanna-

A rough pat on the back awakened padded synapsis. There was a sudden yell:

«Run!»

Legs did the work better than brain, jerking up, stomping on the stairs using no breath at all, with lungs empty of air and full of ashes and gun-powder scent.

Sudden cracks and blows followed the run to the second floor, heartbeats stuffed ears and throat, climbing on the gut's walls with the acidic adrenaline's aftertaste. Eyes were watering from fear and dirt, legs were moving by heart to the most open space in the house: the balcony; the goddamn 1x1 meter balcony with a lovely Thai grocery shop's sight.

Chest crushed on the railing so suddenly, fresh spring breeze hit her with a kick in the lungs.

I'm out

The consciousness got foggy at that moment of paradise, and a tight grasp on the pajama brang it back down to the shitty ground: someone tugged her far from the metal grip of the railing, sucking her entrails backwards to throw her on the ground.

She slides all the short way to the wall; the head burned in a sudden bang on the fucking drainpipe.

Someone collected her body by pulling the shirt again, and lifted her whole weight. Terrible dry and smelly scent of old and powder hit her nostrils, one millimeter away from the not so ensuring face of a stranger in some sort of full-military asset.

He smiled so kindly while spitting:

«Goodbye, dorogoy»

And pushed her out of the balcony.

Whatever came next, is void: body and soul get vacuumed in the eternal nothingness of a fall from the fourth floor; eyes squeezed, adrenaline rushed to the brain, screaming: you're gonna die; but there was nothing to grasp, nothing to grab, nothing to save her.

My breakfast's still in the microwave; a stupid last thought.

Just, it wasn't the last.

A firm hand catched her ankle, burning soft skin under rough gloves. She dangled, hanging still so dangerously close to the railing that the head banged again, but that was the smallest of her problems. Voices came from above, heard hazy and fuzzy in her scattered brain, yells and metal exchanging places as if someone was trying to drive a nail with a gun.

Then, a more nitid, strangely pronounced: «Let bounty fall»

And a clear loaded gun.

Her fried brain took advantage of that moment to make a to-do-list: the missing will, in case of premature death (almost certainly at that point); the promise to eat grandma's piadina at her home; a pistachio-macchiato she owned Johnny since he brought her home during a storm; oh, and…

…and air swallowed her up with the force of muscles she certainly didn't have.

The same, tight grip that was avoiding her a spine-crusher-jump, suddenly lifted her from the ankle, with a pull so strong that she was sure wings had grown on her back, letting her fulfill the dream to be a fairy. But as soon as the body flipped over the balcony, the gloved hand made her change trajectory with a fast move.

Air gave her stomach a kick and her guts a stir, while whoever was moving her threw every inch of Winnie the Pooh pajama, yellow air and morning sickness on the "dorogoy" one, as if she was a goddamn club.

She was smashed on the man, facepalming her nose on his gear, and he was tossed KO on the ground.

Floor's caress hit her too, still held by ankles and, maybe, with a kneecap a little bit out of its place.

«Ye'r alright?»

The known voice reached her ears, and that was the first good news since one hour.

He's still here

Then she kinda blacked out, not dazed enough to faint, but at least to replace sounds with heartbeats and sight with foggy, swirling floor tiles.

Moment of silence.

Johnny pointed at who they were supposed to protect.

«What in the bloody hell-»

«There wasn't time» was the rushed up answer. Ghost let the naked ankle go, patting his oddly slimy gloves on the tights.

«Why 're women so creamy?»

«Beauty purposes»

«'S horrible»

«Didn't think you were so picky»

«I don't like touching maggot's texture, if that's what you mean by "being picky"»

Soap knelt next to her, who faltered something inaudible as soon as being touched. He stuck his finger around her joints, checking for potential damages.

She whined as he turned her face up to him: there was a big, yellowy spot next to the left side eye.

«That was already there» Ghost's specified.

«Aye, I know»

Fingers pressed on her knees.

«She truly is a strong one» Lt. muttered.

«Told ya»

«Difficult to believe»

«Ye've literally throwed her like a goddamn baseball bat»

Ghost silently looked at the girl, splattered on the ground.

«It worked»

He crunched down, collecting her body on his back as a potato bag.

«'S better get the hell outta here»

«What 'bout wake her up first?»

«Are ya proposing to explain her the whole shit bag now?»

Soap hesitated for two seconds; that sounded as a negative answer for the Lt.

◌◌◌◌◌

One hour later, morning coffee hit Price with strong aroma, cigar aftertaste and a plethora of questions condemned to be unresolved.

He sipped, holding the mug a little longer in front of his face just to look at her without making it too obvious how bad he had no idea of what the fuck was the matter with that random yellow-haired lady sit in his office, surrounded by Johnny and his pathetical attempt to be comforting.

«Is» he pointed at her «she the target?»

Gaz nodded. «Soap said so»

«Mh». He sipped again, pondering about it.

«A bloody child»

«Apparently she's twentythree»

«What's the point?»

«Bakery worker, living in a suburb's flat, three roommates-»

«The point in her being a target» Price specified.

Gaz lowered the voice, trying to capture some crumble of whatever Soap was saying to the girl who was, luckily, giving 'em her back. He carefully opened a pack of crackers. «We've had a speech 'bout it. You already forgot?»

The captain pierced Gaz's breakfast in a cold glare.

«You're as helpful as a mosquito net in a submarine»

A sudden fear of downgrading hit the sergeant. The cracker came back in the pack.

«…sorry cap. She's the» he cleared his throat, feeling a little stupid saying: «someone with a magic whatever», as Soap had described her the first time.

Memory about the oddest Task Force's meeting of all time gave Price a facepalm.��

He swallowed half the cup of coffee at once.

«What in the bloody hell are we doing»

«…an unbearable, complete fucking disaster»

Patting her head was an option Soap was evaluating for half an hour, but maybe it wasn't the most clever move. He ended up looking at her very firmly.

«That's the bloody hell you've saved me from»

No signs of life from the other side. He munched a few swears, knowing so well what he was trying was as confusing as telling a chicken that it could fly like eagles with its shitty wings.

«Look» he started again, third time in a row «'m not kidding, 'k? I know it's you who 'm looking for, 'm just asking a little help to understand how in the fuck a goddamn bullet disappeared one inch from ma head»

She wasn't trembling, crying, fainting; maybe she wasn't even breathing, sitting still in front of his face while Soap had a complete visual of her pissed face, and the lovely sight of Gaz eating crackers and Price silently hating everyone while standing in the corridor.

«Two years»

The story began again in a low sigh. Soap raised two fingers at his temple.

«It was two years ago. I was 'bout to be bloody dead meat, with a shoot here, a russian bullet in ma brain»

He decided it was time for the secret weapon: a piece of newspaper came out from his pocket, shown as if it was the Saint Grall in all its oldness and perfection.

«'Ve found this». Soap pointed at the paper: a photo, five written lines. «It's you. Hospitalized 'cause of a bullet nearly pierced your temple»

The sheet got closer to her face.

«Except for you being alone. In your home. And I know ye'r no suicidal»

Silence. Again.

Soap managed to pat her shoulder, a middle way between raising his voice to be the bad policeman, and pinching her cheeks to be the friendly one.

«...'m sorry for the shitty tons of lies 've told ye. At the bakery, I mean». It was so stupid to make apologies, but he did it anyway. «Duty purposes, laddie»

He gave her another pat.

«Fact is that who tried to kill me knows you». He chose to get straight to the point. «'Cause ye've got…dunno. Something. And that something saved me, somehow. And look, gorgeous, I don't believe in "abrakadabra", and whole Harry Potter's universe's a shitty filmography for ma taste. I just know I'm still breathing 'cause of you, and I'm used to return favors»

«There's no point in explain myself if you don't believe in magic»

Voice cut her throat sharply yet loud, destroying every Soap's attempt of being nice. Her still swollen eyes pointed at him.

«Is not something I can explain»

«Try»

It was so surreal as a situation that if a llama with a hat appeared, no one would have been surprised.

«I'll listen, at least»

◌◌◌◌◌

Snake bites hurt the most when the weather wasn't stable. Like an old good war scar, hidden under shiny gold dots that she constantly tortured in search of a crumble of quiet.

«Lost in yer thoughts?»

Marigold's hair waved like a dandelion's shade in the gloomy morning. A big cup of pistachio-macchiato was presented in all of its greatness to the usual early-morning customer.

«Kinda funny weather, isn't it?»

«That's London, laddie»

She chuckled kindly, repeating a motion used with every visitor that became authentic just with Johnny.

«I'd rather be surrounded by coriander field»

«That's what ye planted 'round the house?»

«My parents' choice. I don't like them, smell becomes odd on rainy days. Better than London's morning, though»

«Aye. I bet sun suits ye better»

Another chuckle, and she went KO with a throaty laugh that exploded hidden in her hands. Johnny raised his cup.

«Cheers»

Two months before he showed up out of nowhere, stating "the smell of good coffee" had brought him to the Merry Marguerite.

Marigold had seen all sort of human being in her bakery-waitress experience: who pretended to look at ease in suit, leather bag and badly knotted tie; who was hiding from his life, drowning every brain cell in sugar; happy ones and silent ones; lost ones and usual ones; strong espresso ones, and milky-chocolaty-heavy cream latte ones.

Johnny was none of them.

Johnny was a usual stranger, a known foreigner, a recalled wayfarer; a usual guest who showed up every ten years, but you know him since you've been born.

«Merry Marguerite. 'S yer name?». That was the question in front of the first pistachio-macchiato the girl had ever been asked for.

«Nope. That's my boss previous cat»

«Cool. So 'm not gonna call you Margie or somethin'»

What a funny way to ask a name. She smiled at first, kindly, disappearing in the back to grab some fresh pain au chocolat.

Marigold didn't expect him to wait for an actual answer.

He came and clinged on the counter, with those huge biceps relaxed and a silly smile, a little cocky but never disrespectful. He asked for his macchiato, made a joke about the bakery's name and waited for her to give him something back.

After three days she giggled him a quick: «Mary, Or Goldie. Doll, if you want, some friends of mine used to call me Doll»

«'Cause ye'r cute?»

«'Cause as a child I used to cut every inch of my doll's hair and make them join the "punk club"»

And tortured doll's stories were what made them friends.

«You're gonna have green tongue at this rate»

«Can't help it. That's the best pistachio-macchiato in town»

«Of course. That's why there's a secret recipe»

Johnny raised his eyes from the cup. He was dressed up almost the same every day: jeans and t-shirt, mohawk and bright-curious eyes as blue as the sky London decided not to show to his citizens.

«Spit it out»

Answer was a long breath of her, blown on the fresh madeleines.

«A secret's a secret, Johnny»

«Ye made me curious, though»

«That what secrets are about: make people eager to know what's underneath»

«Aye. I can tell ye're good at that»

Her fingers stopped working on the correct rearrangement of the custard croissants.

«Yeah? Am I that good at not blabbing our secret recipes?» she laughed. «I'll add the skill to my curriculum, then»

The waiting for an answer became a little too long, making her raise her sight.

Johnny wasn't really laughing: his smile was telling something that could go from "I know what kinda porn you're into" to "the yellow in your hair is brightening my day up".

He suddenly smirked: «Feeling under pressure, Doll?», ending the question in the last macchiato sip.

«Should I?». She clinged on the counter, a little cheeky «Am I under interrogation?»

«Ah» The empty cup ended up on the side, allowing him to have a full vision of her hair brightness. «It would be no good for ye»

«How come?»

«C-u-r-i-o-s-i-t-y» He spelled. «I'll end up digging too deep on ye to find what's underneath. It's not pleasant havin' a stranger stomping on yer garden»

«And what if you lose yourself while finding a way out of me?»

«Ye'll guide me. 'M sure ye've got signs in whatever wood has grown inside of you»

And Marigold became silent, softly smiling a sad sight, unexpected through the funny mood Johnny thought to have been built.

«And…» A warm, sugary smelling madeleine was offered to him as a pay in advance. «If you find the way out, would you tell me too, please, which way I ought to go from there?»

He chuckled, suddenly kinda softened by her tone, catching the quote so well he wasted no time to replay:

«It depends a good deal on where you want to get to»

«I don't much care where»

«Then it doesn't much matter which way you go»

Whole bakery filled with the loss of words that baked the room in glazed and caramelized smell, crunchy as a chocolate cookie fresh from the oven. Silence got stuffed with coffee sipped under breath, time got replaced with madeleine's crumbs rolled under the fingertips.

The first bite on the pastry broke the spell. Johnny ate it whole, chewing slowly.

«Seems like, even if ye're lost in yer wonderland, ye'v found a way to me»

And then, she knew.

She knew he had read her somehow, even if he hadn't understood a single word.

It was two years ago that the dream went away: a man alone, dark and chaos of voices, blood smell and an odd, painful hold on the guts; words shouted fast and aggressively, a clock ticking, the well known feeling of something that was about to happen.

A shot.

And the sudden awakening in a sweat lake, breath lost in the dream and the pressure against her lungs screaming that there wasn't time left.

Marigold didn't know why she had chosen to go to bed that early, as much as she didn't know why she was running out of bed, stomping on the fallen sheets to reach the bathroom curled on her reversed stomach, with guts mixing inside as if she was dish-washing her organs.

Lungs were closed, breath fought to come in and out and heart started racing faster, pounding so much blood to her head. Fingers grasped the hair, dug the scalp, searched for a way to the brain like something was desperately trying to get out, or get in, she didn't know, it was just so painful, so hopeless, so furious, and clock ticked faster, louder, stuffing head and eardrums while voices become clearer, surrounding her in a battlefield that certainly wasn't her bathroom anymore.

Everything came to a peak of adrenaline piercing her brain. She grabbed something from somewhere, tearing it away from a reality that wasn't her, that shouldn't have been her, in which she didn't belong. Her fingers grasped the bullet, pulling it away from him, whoever him was.

And she just took it with her, in the bathroom, stepping out of the trajectory fast enough to let it just scratch her head.

◌◌◌◌◌

«Why?»

Her shoulders scrolled, stiff from the tension.

«I've asked myself so many times. Maybe because I know you were dying. Whoever you were. Whatever you were doing»

«When we met the first time, did ye recognize me?»

«No. Dream wasn't that clear»

«Did you speak 'bout it with family? Friends, or-»

«Is not that easy to explain, I've told you»

«Have ye done it before?»

She havered on the chair, eyebrows frowned and lower lips bitten to hold the trembling.

«Dunno». Voice raised to hide the fear, replacing it with slow boiled anger. «Maybe»

«Ye don't know?»

«No» She shouted. «I can't know, I've not got a secret diary about headaches and nightmares, sorry»

«Ye'r tellin' me ye've got some sorta "telekinetic" power-»

«'M telling you nothing. Just how it went that night»

«Aye, that's what 'm saying: you're describing me, if not a magic trick, at least a psychic ability»

«I don't know what it is» Words became sharp pebbles thrown randomly out of her guts. «And if you wanted to thank me 'cause you're still alive, I accept your gratitude, even if you've brought me home a goddamn bunch of armed people»

She hit the right spot to make him straighten his back on the chair, while still trying to upload information about the whole "dream" matter.

Soap knew his face got a little crinkle around the eyes and the stiff teeth.

«We've brought none to you, Doll. They would have been there to kill you anyway»

«I don't have any Russian friends. Nor enemies»

He mumbled: «Aye», as if he already knew what kind of people she was acquainted with, as if he'd already dug her whole life. And she faltered, squeezing fists on her pajamas, shaking in a motion of frustration that got her to the guts.

«What? Have you already scanned me? You've done what the fuck you wanted with my free day just for what?»

Johnny fell from an apple tree.

«We went to save you-»

«Sure, after spending whole months telling me bullshits. ‘Cause everything was bullshit. Correct? Our chats at the bakery, you working as a PC technician, your terrible coffee tastes…»

Words died on her tongue in a sudden spin of her head. She grabbed her temples, rilling fingertips around the pale skin, and hissed as the digits touched the livid bruise around the eye.

Liquorice aroma filled her nostrils in a strong caress; Soap was offering her a candy pack.

«Ye've not eaten this mornin'» He muttered, recalling the time at the bakery when she almost fainted 'cause of skipped breakfast and lower pressure.

She took a bunch of bitter-sweet treats, stuffing her mouth.

Johnny's sight made a fly to his feet, collecting time before blowing: «Wasn't all bullshits. Sorry, anyway»

«Why that much effort? What for?»

«Get to know ye. I need to be sure 'bout you»

«Pretty sure I'm as clear as an empty fish tank to you, by now»

«Wrong»

She frowned, irritated from the tip toes to the dry hair's double edges. Liquorice candy cracked under her teeth.

«Whaddya mean? That I can't even know how the fuck I play ma goddamn, stupid society-role?»

«Calm down laddie, 's nothin' this pretentious, was just giving ma take on you»

»…mh» another candy ended up chewed under her tongue. «So I'mma childish whoever to you and your mates?»

Soap gazed at her, chuckling, pondering about how seriously he needed to take her bratty chat.

«…was life what made you that difficult to handle?»

«Dunno, you tell me, 's you who filled me in shit to "get to know me"»

At this point a strong, harsh incipit of voice pierced through the corridor, shouting: «The goddamn bloody Jesus of Laswell has finally brought me that stupid-…»

Ghost's steps slowed down as he faced two idiots stuck in front of the office door: one holding a half-pack of crackers, the other was drinking from an empty mug.

Deciding how to react brought him to the right conclusion to pretend nothing was happening. He passed a blue folder to Price, who was badly hiding shame behind a I-wasn't-eavesdropping kinda look.

«Intel 'bout that russian» Ghost explained.

Captain coughed a: «Did he speak?»

«I was very persuasive. Dunno why Laswell needed to write down what he'd already spit with his teeth»

«Bureaucracy can't be avoided. Verdict?»

«Clear as a nuclearized swamp in the middle of nowhere»

«'S what he told you?»

«He told me» skull mask turned darker to match its owner's attitude, lowering on Price's coffee scent breath. «They were there to rob. I made him tell…»

He turned, almost instinctively, as he heard two voices muttering from the office, recognizing Soap's one in the being-as-nice-as-possible mood.

And he saw those horrible yellow bob hair again, the oddest pajama with little Winnie the Pooh stamps, and bruises marked on the arm that Ghost was quite sure was the one he made collide with the Russian soldier.

«Why is that child still there?»

«Security»

«That's why I'm asking you. Shouldn't be held, like, somewhere safer?»

«Nothin's safer than my office»

Ghost blown, nodding ironically.

«Plus» The folder came back to the Lt. «Soap wasted no time trapping her in that sorta interrogatory». Price gazed at them, knowing well Johnny was aware they had listened to everything. «Don't think he's cleared his mind 'bout you-know-what, though»

«Better he does, since we've rushed all of this shit 'cause of that»

Price sighed, Gaz chuckled 'cause it was funny seeing Ghost complaining like an old man, and the Lieutenant just growled again: «An enormous ton of shit»

«Following that lady wasn't time wasted, at least. There is something stinky hidden underneath». The last cracker was being chewed in a mess of crumbles on the shirt. Gaz muttered a swear before adding: «She was being chased by those men. Fully armed, you said»

«Affirmative. Three, ready to kill»

«What were you sayin' 'bout it?»

«That russian» Ghost instantly reconnected his synapsis with the previous speech, recalling his fists on the man's face with a hidden smirk. «said they were sent by some sorta monk»

The statement made the audience caught by suspense. Frowned eyebrows and tilted foreheads spoke for themselves.

Gaz tried to break the silence with a cautious: «Some sorta wha-»

But Price felt the urge to make a fast recall:

«Four months ago, Soap found that girl with the "magic whatever" that he stated saved him from Makarov. Two days ago» he counted on his fingers «Soap spotted a man following her home. He also did the day after. That made Sergeant suspicious and you two eventually get involved in that sorta "saving" operation»

«Soap was right, at least. Someone was keeping a close watch on her»

«Yeah, but» Captain's hand flew in the air, holding his line of discussion. «Am I the only one noticing there's a bloody nothin' logic 'bout this? Are we really getting involved in somethin' raised by a "someone saved me with magic, and I'm gonna find him"?»

Ghost gazed at him, eyes half-hidden by the mask.

«You trusted Soap»

«Undoubtedly» Was shouted so clearly that nothing was left to be clarified.

It wasn't Soap himself the wrong variable in the equation.

It was that Soap was right.

And it was not logical. So illogical it was actually happening, and Price couldn't just register an impossible chance that was occurring in front of his goddamn eyes.

«What if» Gaz suggested, licking cracker crumbles out of his lips «We just ask her?»

«Ya heard: she doesn't know»

«Yeah, well, maybe she doesn't know if it's safe to spit out the truth in front of three strangers and an almost ex-friend» He nodded toward Soap. «'S not like he's playin' his cards well»

«What do you suggest, sergeant?»

«We could just-»

And the chair that was hosting Marigold's butt suddenly got thrown on the floor by her sudden standing. Three pairs of eyes caught her taking on Soap in all her pajamas and yellowness, without a single world left as she grabbed the sergeant's shirt with both hands, roaring with a voice thought impossible for one her size:

«Just let me at least pretend I did something good!!»

She turned her still naked feet, ready to run home somehow, killing spree in her clenched fists and rage in her bruised throat.

Steps died immediately at the trio's sight.

The otter-puppy eyed with a hat; the good twin of Chris from "The day before" ; the Dia de los muertos cosplayer in the wrong season.

Classification ended with a kick in the head from her own brain, which told her to have a good look at that scary-skeleton mask.

She blew her cheeks, finger pointed at Ghost as she shouted almost with a growl:

«Youfuckin'sonofa-!»

◌◌◌◌◌

#call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #cod #cod fanfic #fanfiction #oc #johnny soap mctavish #john price #gaz kyle garrick #simon ghost riley #original character #magic #Soap doesn't die here for god's sake just let him live #writer on tumblr #ao3 #i don't know what i'm doing but i'm doing it

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