#demarcation point
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#demarcation point#25 ft extension cord#rg6 coaxial cable#rg6 catv cable#flat line#mounting wall brackets
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I think it'd be nice for my mental health if we didn't have a regularly scheduled Cataclysmic Collective Event every couple of years
#there are things that demarcate a clear before/after in life#where the before world/self becomes unfathomable to the after world/self once you've crossed that point#and I wish those things did not keep happening with such regularity#sometimes I mentally mix up things that happened in early 2016 with things that happened in 2019#because my brain is categorizing them as 'things that happened Right Before That Really Bad Thing'
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god forbid (literally) someone not want to submit to god
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regular achievable plans (what if we learned a language simply because we wanted to get better at cataloguing different versions of johnny has gone for a soldier/siúil a rún...)
#news from the cupola#ballads and things#OKAY SO my normal first place to do lyrics look-up is mainlynorfolk which lists four versions#the version I've listened to the most for the johnny version is mark o'connor's which doesn't Have the chorus as a sung part#and most with the sung chorus either have it as siúil a grá or siúil a rún (transliteration variable) even when the rest of the song's#in english! something by which I'm Fascinated.#now the OTHER thing that's perplexing is that mainlynorfolk lists a john tams version of johnny with the siúil a grá chorus#but the only place I can track down a recording of mr tams singing this is Inside A Sharpe Episode#and what's also mysterious to me here is that the mainlynorfolk version lists a chorus and verse that doesn't Happen in the sharpe version#quick scan of another version (pete seeger) which isn't listed in the four variations I looked at earlier Also doesn't have those verses#WAITAMINUTE HEY I'm a fool it's in the STRANGE SOUNDTRACK CD#...and with a bit more looking I'VE FOUND IT AND IT'S GOT THE EXTRA VERSES IN IT#anyway back to the original point of this post which is that I realized that I've memorized about half of siúil a rún phonetically#and I should learn the proper demarcations of sound in the words so I can sing it more nicely and without my usual stumblemumble#altho' I'm also tempted to learn the weird john tams version except I know I'll be tempted to put a slant rhyme somewhere he doesn't
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Mordred: *disappears in a puff of retcon*
How I think the knights would react if they walked in on Arthur and Merlin kissing for the first time
Leon: Quietly closes the door and stands guard outside so no one else disturbs them. If he has to leave he puts up a sigh saying "Poetry in session - Do not disturb"
Percival: Quickly backs out of the room apologising the entire time
Gwaine: Asks to join, gets something thrown at him, threatens Arthur to treat Merlin right, and finally leaves while talking about all the people who owe him money thanks to this
Elyan: Calls out "THEY'RE KISSING" while running away from the room
Lancelot: Quietly closes the door and slowly backs away down the hall. As soon as he's too far away for them to hear he's running to find Gwen and tell her everything
#the united kingdoms never emerge#instead becoming a more equitable union#ireland scotland and wales remain independent of england#they discover the power of working together#and the value of differing people#they forego colonization#establishing fairer exploration practices#the european colonization is no match for their cooperative expansion#the dutch indian company never gains power#columbus never sails the atlantic#the line of demarcation is never needed#the indigenous peoples of the western continents retain their lands#...at this point i should really just write up an AU setting >.>#fix some of those pesky details ('^.^)
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i love playing with names so much. any story or setting where theres a deliberate use of names and differing terms of address and you can really read into a characters choices and it says so much is the Good Fucking Shit
#examples include all the name shit going on in stuff like The Untamed#bc ive been rewatching a fucking ton of fmvs and basically all of them pull out the one time they both use their full courtesy names#because its a moment that kicks ass. is dramatic. and is MEANINGFUL to the relationship right#bc you can contrast it with the fact that wwx basically never calls him lwj. he gets very familiar very fast#other examples include a lot of sows around Boats and strict hierarchies bc then youve got a chain of command#theres episodes of tng that play with it a bit. id point to Rascals as a really really funny example of name play#bc you get picard in a 10yos body still referring to riker the same way he would as his commanding officer#hence 'hes my number 1 dad' funniest shit. i love that episode#not every ep is consistent on that bc differing writers deploy names differently#but you'll get contrasts where eg riker generally calls people their first names and picard uses surnames#so riker will say 'geordi' and picard will say 'mr laforge'. again not consistently but it does happen#boat media loves this shit bc again chain of command. its often a great demarcator of a public to a private scene#such as in Hornblower where most of the time he is 'Mr Hornblower' but in private scenes hes Horatio#and he doesnt have a Lot of those and its not super consistent but you know it when its happening#i love names. its why i have like 15 of them
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why do you think indie metroidvanias specifically take so long to make, and is there a solution that you'd like to see them go for? (i know that would likely mean a compromise of some kind, but like, you know)
The reason why is fairly obvious: the classic metroidvania formula makes it very easy to fall prey to unintentional scope creep and is a positive nightmare to QA.
Non-linear progression gating based on precision platforming challenges where the player's basic moveset is constantly changing means every little thing needs to be rigorously tested in every part of the gameworld, carefully checking every room with every combination of abilities the player could conceivably possess for a wide range of failure states.
Is there some combination of abilities that allows the player to get into this room, but not out of it afterwards? Is there some combination of abilities that allows the player to do things in an order you didn't expect? Does that variation in sequencing in turn create situations where the player can end up somewhere without an ability you had assumed was required to get there? And so forth.
Even once you've got everything tested, it's not over. Every tiny change during development, even as small as adding or subtracting a couple of percentage points from the player character's jumping height or walking speed, can potentially have a domino effect that introduces a whole new set of failure states. It's not a pretty picture!
As for solutions, the one most solo or small-team metroidvanias end up adopting is to put a damper on the exponential QA explosion by linearising progression. If you haven't flipped the right switch or visited the right room, the door simply doesn't open, the progression-critical cutscene simply doesn't trigger, and so forth. Even big-name metroidvanias often make judicious use of this one: for example, Super Metroid has certain doors in the early game that just arbitrarily will not open until you've collected a couple of specific items from the game's combat-free introductory area.
The trouble with this approach is that if you use it to the extent that's necessary to keep your QA responsibilities at a manageable level for a small team or solo developer, you functionally end up with a linear, level-based platformer that makes you walk from one level to the next. Whether this disqualifies a given title from the "metroidvania" label is a demarcation problem I'm not interested in litigating, but folks who expected a more open world experience are quite understandably going to be disappointed.
The approach I'd prefer more indie metroidvanias take is to keep things under control by limiting their scope. Not ever damn thing needs to be the next Hollow Knight; many classics of the genre can be completed in well under an hour with good routing even without employing modern speedrun tech. Similarly, some of the best indie metroidvanias are those with the smallest maps; Alruna and the Necro-Industrialists, probably the best example of open-world map design of any metroidvania published in 2024, has a map that's scarcely twenty by twenty screens, and its routing is downright fiendish.
(One of my perennial probably-never-gonna-happen projects is to design a full-featured metroidvania targeting a two to three hour casual playthrough whose entire map can fit on a single screen while remaining at a vaguely playable zoom level, in the style of titles like 1 Screen Platformer.)
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Dragon Age: The Veilguard info compilation Post 1
Post is under a cut due to length.
There is a lot of information coming out right now about DA:TV from many different sources. This post is just an effort to compile as much as I can in one place, in case that helps anyone. Sources for where the information came from have been included. Where I am linking to a social media user's post, the person is either a dev, a Dragon Age community council member or other person who has had a sneak peek at and played the game. nb, this post is more of a 'info that came out in snippets from articles and social media posts' collection rather than a 'regurgitating the information on the official website or writing out what happened in the trailer/gameplay reveal' post. The post is broken down into headings on various topics. A few points are repeated under multiple headings where relevant. Where I am speculating without a source, I have clearly demarcated this. if you notice any mistakes in this post, please tell me.
as this post hit a kind of character limit, there will probably be at least 1 more post. :)
Character Creation
CC is vast [source] and immensely detailed [source]
We will enter CC straight after Varric's opening narration [source]
You are given 5 categories to work your way through in CC: Lineage, Appearance, Class, Faction, Playstyle. Each of these has a range of subcategories within them. There are 8 subcategories within the "head" subcategory" in "Appearance" alone [source]
Lineage dictates things like race (i.e. human, elf, dwarf, qunari) and backstory [source]
Backstories include things like factions. Factions offer 3 distinct buffs each [source]
There are dozens and dozens of hairstyles [source]
There are separate options for binary and non-binary pronouns and gender [source]
"BioWare's work behind the scenes, meanwhile, goes as deep as not only skin tones but skin undertones, melanin levels, and the way skin reacts differently to light" [source]
CC has a range of lighting options within it so that you can check how the character looks in them [source]
There are a range of full-body customization options such as a triangular slider between body types and individual settings down to everything from shoulder width to glute volume [source]. There are "all the sliders [we] could possibly want". The body morpher option allows us to choose different body sizes [source]
All body options are non-gendered [source]
They/them pronouns are an option [source]
Rook can be played as non-binary [source]
Individual strands of hair were rendered separately and react remarkably to in-game physics [source]
Special, focused attention was paid to ensuring that hairstyles "come across as well-representative, that everyone can see hairstyles that feel authentic to them, even the way they render" [source]
The game uses strand hair technology borrowed in part from the EA Sports games. The hair is "fully-controlled by physics," so it "looks even better in motion than it does here in a standstill" [source]
The ability to import our choices from previous games is fully integrated into CC. This will take the form of tarot cards - "you can go into your past adventures" and this mechanic tells you what the context was and what decision you want to make [source]
In CC we will also be able to customize/remake our Inquisitor [source]
A core tenet of the game is "be who you want to be" [source]
There are presets for all 4 of the game's races (human, elf, dwarf, qunari), in case detailed CCs overwhelm you [source]
Story
The story is set 9 years since Inquisition [source]
The Inquisitor will appear [source]
Other characters refer to the PC as Rook [source]. This article says they are "the Rook" [source]
The ability to import our choices from previous games is fully integrated into CC. This will take the form of tarot cards - "you can go into your past adventures" and this mechanic tells you what the context was and what decision you want to make [source]
The prologue is quite lengthy. A narrated intro from Varric lays the groundwork with some lore and explains about Solas [source]. In this Varric-narrated opening section, the dwarf recaps the events of previous games and explains the motivations of Solas [source] (Fel note/speculation: this sounds like this cinematic that we saw on DA Day 2023)
What happens first off is that Rook, who is working with Varric, is interrogating a bartender about the whereabouts of a contact in Minrathous who can help them stop Solas. The bartender does not play nice and we are presented with our first choice: talk the bartender down or intimidate them aggressively [source]
The first hour of the game is "a luxurious nighttime romp through a crumbling city under a mix of twinkling starlight and lavish midnight blue" (Minrathous) [source]. The game begins with a tavern brawl (depending on dialogue options) and a stroll through Minrathous in search of Neve Gallus, who has a lead on Solas [source]. Minrathous then comes under attack [source] by demons [source] (Fel note/speculation: it sounds like the demo the press played is what we saw in the Gameplay Reveal). Off in the distance is a vibrant, colorful storm where Solas is performing his ritual. [source] Eventually we come upon Harding. [source] and Neve. Rook and co enter a crumbling castle, where ancient elf secrets pop up, "seemingly just for the lore nerds". [source] Then we teleport to Arlathan Forest, have a mini boss fight with a Pride Demon, and there is the climactic confrontation with Solas. After a closing sequence, at this point it is the end of the game's opening mission. [source] (Fel note/speculation: So the Gameplay Reveal showed the game's opening mission)
The action in the story's opening parts starts off quite quick from the sounds of things: the devs wanted to get the player right in to the story. because, “Especially with an RPG where they can be quite lore-heavy, a lot of exposition at the front and remembering proper nouns, it can be very overwhelming.” [source]
BioWare wanted to make the beginning of Dragon Age: The Veilguard feel like the finale of one of their other games [source]
Rook's Faction will be referenced in dialogue [source]
Minrathous is beautiful, with giant statues, floating palaces, orange lantern glow and magical runes which glow green neon. These act "like electricity" as occasional signs above pubs and stores [source]
The story has a lot of darkness tonally. These dark parts of the game contain the biggest spoilers [source]. However, the team really wanted to build in contrast between the dark and light moments in the game, as if everything is dark, nothing really feels dark [source]
Our hub (like the Normandy in ME or Skyhold in DA:I) is a place called The Lighthouse [source] (Fel note/speculation: I guess this screenshot shows the crew in The Lighthouse? ^^)
Each companion has a very complex backstory, their own problems, and deep motivations. These play out through well-fleshed out character arcs and missions that are unique to them but which are ultimately tied into the larger story [source]
We will make consequential decisions for each character, sometimes affecting who they are in heart-wrenching ways and other times joyously [source]
Decisions from previous DA games will be able to be carried over, it will just work a bit differently this time [source]. The game will not read our previous saves. For stuff pertaining to previous games/choices, players will not have to link their accounts [source]
Characters, companions, romance
Varric is a major character [source]
Every companion is romanceable [source]
BioWare tried to make each character's friendship just as meaningful, regardless of romance [source]
If you don't romance a character, they may end up romancing each other [source]
There will be some great cameos [source]. Some previous characters are woven into the game [source]
Companion sidequests/optional content relating to companions is highly curated when it involves their motivations and experiences [source]
We could permanently lose some companions depending on our choices [source]
Our choices can influence if characters get injured and what they think about us [source]
The bonds Rook forges with companions determine how party members grow and what abilities become available [source]
Each companion has a very complex backstory, their own problems, and deep motivations. These play out through well-fleshed out character arcs and missions that are unique to them but which are ultimately tied into the larger story [source]
We will make consequential decisions for each character, sometimes affecting who they are in heart-wrenching ways and other times joyously [source]
Gameplay, presentation, performance etc
Each class (warrior, rogue, mage) has 3 specializations. The ones for Rogue are duelist, saboteur and Veil ranger [source]. (Fel note/speculation: Veil ranger reminds me of Bellara. Maybe this is her 'spec' too?)
Duelist gameplay involves a sharp combination of dashes, parries, leaps, rapid slashes and combos [source]
Faction-related buffs include being able to hold an extra potion or do extra damage against certain enemies [source]
Individual strands of hair were rendered separately and react remarkably to in-game physics [source]
Playstyle settings include custom, distinct difficulty settings for options as granular as parry windows, meaning "players who might fancy that playstyle but typically struggle with the finer points of combat can give it a go" [source]
Combat mechanics is a mix of real-time action and pause and play. Pausing brings up a radial menu split into 3 sections: companions to the left and right, Rook's skills at the bottom, and a targeting system at the top which helps get in focus on certain enemies. [source]. In the pause system you can queue up your whole party's attacks [source]
Tapping or holding the shoulder button pauses the game, allowing us to stop the action and issue orders to companions [source]
There is a system of specific enemy resistances and weaknesses [source]. Weaknesses and resistances plays a big role in combat and abilities are designed to exploit these accordingly [source]. An example is that "one character might be able to plant a weakening debuff on an enemy, and another enemy might be able to detonate them" [source]
There is a vast skill tree of unlockable options [source]
You can set up specific companions with certain kits, e.g. to tackle specific enemy types, to being more of a support, or as flexible all-rounders [source]
Healing magic returns [source]
Abilities can change together with elaborate results, e.g. one companion using a gravity well attack that sucked enemies together, another using a slowing move to keep them in place, and Rook using a big AOE to catch them all at once [source]
A shortcut system lets you map a few abilities to a smaller pinned menu at the bottom of the screen [source]
There are class-specific resource systems. For example, Rogue has "momentum", which builds up as Rook lands consecutive hits [source]
Each class will always have a ranged option [source]
Rogue Rook can do a sort of 'hip fire' option with a bow, letting you pop off arrows from the waist [source]
Warriors can throw their shield at enemies, and can build an entire playstyle around that using the skill tree [source]
There is light platforming gameplay [source]
The game runs on the latest iteration of the Frostbite engine [source]
The game targets 60 fps
On consoles it will feature performance and quality modes so we can choose our preferred visual fidelity [source]
The game is mission based [source]. Some levels that we go to do open up, some with more exploration than others. "Alternate branching paths, mysteries, secrets, optional content you're going to find and solve." [source]
Everything is hand-touched, hand-crafted and highly curated [source]
Some sidequests and optional content is highly curated, especially when it involves the motivations and experiences of the companions. In others we may be investigating for example a missing family, with an entire open bog environment to search for clues and a way to solve the disappearance [source]
Gameplay, presentation, performance etc continued, after the above bullet list hit a character limit
There is sophisticated animation cancelling and branching. Gameplay is action-like, and the design centers around dodging, countering, and using risk-reward charge attacks designed to break enemy armor layers [source]
The dialogue wheel returns [source]. It gives truncated summaries of the dialogue options rather than the full line that the character is going to say [source]
The bonds Rook forges with companions determine how party members grow and what abilities become available [source]
For stuff pertaining to previous games/choices, players will not have to link their accounts [source]
We can play the game fully offline [source]
There are no microtransactions [source]
The game itself is not as cell-shaded in look as the first trailer looked [source]
[☕ found this post or blog interesting or useful? my ko-fi is here if you feel inclined. thank you 🙏]
#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: dreadwolf#dragon age 4#the dread wolf rises#da4#dragon age#bioware#lgbtq+#video games#long post#longpost#solas#1k+#mass effect#character death cw#injury cw#update: there is now a part 2 and 3 and 4 of this post#tumblr unfortunately wont let me edit the link to them into this post for some reason thought sorry :<#you will have to browse through my more recent posts to find them#thanku to dreadfutures who also let me know about the accessibility tweet in this comp :>
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A Dichotomy of Thought || 5
Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Further Parts
Johnny recovers slowly.
-
Fifteen minutes? Simon messages you. A flare going up in the darkness, an SOS signal even if you don’t know the accuracy of the analogy. But he doesn’t hear back from you that day. Maybe what little luck he had left that wasn’t bad luck has run out. Maybe you realized that you had no real reason to be guilty, that Soap had stepped out in front of your car on purpose. You didn’t owe them anything.
Simon wishes he could swallow that flare back up, eat it whole, let it burn him alive, but he can’t. Johnny needs him.
Ever since the seizure, it’s been one bad pain day after another. The seizure itself was rough on his body, but so was how hard Soap fought afterwards, dealing himself damage that he didn’t even have the processing yet to tally up.
Like clockwork he’s requiring those little green pills, choking them down on empty stomachs. Simon even has to break out what’s left of the sublingual morphine which they hadn’t used since Johnny first came home from inpatient rehabilitation. Only then will Johnny manage to fall into fitful sleeps wracked with nightmares and phantom pains from his missing arm. He cancels all therapy that week, hoping Johnny will return to his baseline soon. Hoping for the days he used to wish away.
It’s hell on earth. Simon lays in bed beside him, ready to wake him from another nightmare, going on three days without sleep and he wishes that he had been the one in the helicopter instead. Wishes that it had killed him, since he can’t ever wish death on Johnny. Not ever. Not even when his boy begs for it.
His phone buzzes, and it’s you: I’m free in twenty. Still need me?
Badly. Simon can’t remember the last time he showered. All he wants is fifteen minutes to scrub himself clean and feel human again. All he says though is: Yeah.
You appear just past twenty minutes later wearing a diner uniform. It’s cute: tight pants that hug your thighs and hips, a white button-down blouse tucked in, demarcation where your name tag used to rest.
Simon opens the door and ushers you in, somber-faced, like a pallbearer at a funeral. He goes to the bedroom door and glances in to make sure Johnny is out—there should be no waking him for the next two hours, but if there is one thing Simon has learned, it’s that God Laughs.
“He asleep?” you whisper, lingering a healthy distance away.
“Out like a light. I just need fifteen minutes in the shower.”
“I’ll watch him,” you whisper. Then you add: “I looked it up, by the way. What a seizure looks like. Just in case.”
Simon’s stomach drops between his knees. It takes him several heartbeats to realize that he isn’t nauseous out of any fear response, but out of sheer fucking gratitude. The feeling cuts through the fog in his mind like a knife through butter, and he feels like he sees you for the first time: your hair back away from your face, your healing bruises (and the new one on your chin), the embarrassed desperation in your eyes. You’ve latched on to Johnny too, he can tell, likely by some misguided guilt from almost hitting him with your car. But it’s there. He has a feeling that if Johnny were to take a dive off the balcony, he’d be taking you with him.
You are completely unhinged. Borderline mad, even. Exactly what Johnny needs to keep him alive.
“Fifteen minutes,” says Simon again before slipping into the bathroom, clean clothes tucked under his arm. When he resurfaces, only 11 minutes have passed. The military taught him everything he could need to know about thorough but expeditious showers.
You are sitting at the dining table, having chosen the seat that gives you the best vantage point of Johnny’s sleeping figure in the next room through the doorway. Simon expected to find you on your phone, scrolling away, but it is nowhere in sight. You have sat perfectly still, watching Johnny. It would almost be eerie if he didn’t appreciate it so goddamn much.
“We need to talk about this arrangement,” you say, clasping your hands together. You’re shaking.
“You want out.”
“What? No!” You both glance toward the bedroom, but Johnny snores on, in the throes of morphine-fueled dreams. When you speak again, it is quieter: “I don’t mind helping, but I can only check my phone at certain times of the day.”
This is the part where Simon asks why. But the question sticks to the back of his tongue like something unsavory. A more important question: can he afford to care why beyond what it means for him and for Johnny? The bottom line is that there will be long stretches of time where you’re unavailable. He can live with that. He’s been living with it, hasn’t he?
“I’ll only ever need you when he’s asleep. If he knew I was letting you watch over him, he’d blow his top. I mean that literally.” Simon stands. “You want tea?”
“Tea?” You blink at him like the word does not compute. “Yes, please. Thank you, I mean.”
“Just tea, don’t get worked up over it,” he mutters, going to put the kettle on. He needs a minute to fucking think.
This goes against everything he was ever taught. The foundation of his personality is self-reliance, and it has been since he was a boy, since he learned that he couldn’t rely on adults for anything resembling stability. Asking for help feels like tossing up the white flag, like admitting he’s in too deep and he can’t take it anymore. It feels like failing Johnny.
But there’s construction going on inside him. Those pillars of his personality are being torn down, and in their place something more important is being formed: a shrine to the only person who’s ever loved him that wasn’t his mother. If it’s good for Johnny, Simon must do it, even if it feels strange, even if it goes against all the strategies that have kept him alive in the past.
When he brings tea back to the table, you try to drink it right away, scalding your tongue.
“Slow,” Simon says. He didn’t even get the chance to offer you any milk or sugar.
Face warm as the tea, you drink slower, tongue likely numb. The silence between you grows, adds up, and he catches you more than once looking toward the digital clock inlaid on the stove, like you are nervous and counting down the moments until you can escape. Like Simon frightens you. Fifteen minutes pass and more. You drain your cup.
“I should go,” you say at length.
“Alright.”
“Thank you for the tea.”
“Don’t thank me.”
You just nod and slip out of the apartment, quietly shutting the door behind you. Simon sits there for a long time after you’re gone, thinking over the arrangement. Thinking over you.
You’re in trouble. He just can’t decide if he can afford to take on any more trouble right now.
His tea has cooled by the time Johnny stirs in the other room, calling out for more pills.
-
It does get easier. Tooth and nail they fight for every peaceful moment until they are able to string two of those moments together, and then two becomes three. Johnny is back to his old self—often angry, still pained, but with glimmers of the man Simon used to know shining beneath it all like diamonds under dirt.
Therapy starts again, and so do Johnny’s tasks.
The tasks aren’t therapy. They’re Johnny’s idea: each few days he picks a task that he used to be able to do before the accident and commits himself to relearning it.
Today that tasks is unlocking the front door. He stands with his forehead against the oak, knowing Simon is somewhere on the other side, having heard him turn the deadbolt.
The door has three locks. There is the handle which is the only one the apartment building originally supplied them with. There is the sliding lock, which Simon had installed on day two in the new apartment. It is only ever locked at night when both of them are home, and it is easy enough for Johnny to guide the wide end into the slot. Then there is the deadbolt, also installed by Simon, and easily the trickiest lock of all. Usually it requires the strength of two hands to unlock comfortably—but Soap’s down a hand and short on patience.
“Jesus, get me in this apartment. Amen,” he mutters.
The key shakes in his hand as he guides it to the lock. It takes some fumbling, but he gets it after just a few moments. Then he must twist while pulling outward at the same time. It uses muscles in his arms that have grown weak with disuse. The key catches for a moment but then slides out of the lock uselessly. He pulled too hard; he did not twist hard enough.
It’s a delicate balance, one he had perfected without even trying months ago when they moved in. Now it seems like a cruel and unusual punishment. If he can’t get this fucking door open, he’ll sleep out here, undeserving of his own bed. In his mind, the voice of encouragement does not sound so much like the calm soothing tones of Andy—his physical rehabilitation therapist—but instead the borderline abusive dialect of his superiors during his time in the military, the ones who had only ever cared about results and not much about the bodies getting those results.
Footsteps come from the open elevator, and Johnny casts an irritated glance only to see that it is you. You are dressed for exercise, clingy clothes with running shoes and a baggy top thrown on over everything, drooping off of one of your shoulders. At the sight of you, Johnny remembers the lengths you went to to help him light his cigarette and his heart throbs with fondness, some of his anger evaporating like fog burnt off by the morning sun.
“Afternoon, lass.”
“Hi, Johnny,” you murmur, voice near a whisper as you cast a glance toward your own door. Maybe you are thinking about running from him. “Are you having trouble?”
Johnny’s good mood dissipates. “No,” he lies. “Yes. I don’t fucking know.”
“Can I help?”
“No,” he snaps. “I have to do this myself.”
“Where’s Simon?”
“Inside.”
“He’s locked you out?”
“Aye.”
Your face changes. He knows you so little that it takes a moment for him to identify the expression for what it is: apoplectic rage. Your hands have clenched into fists at your sides, brows drawn low over your eyes as you glare a hole through the door. You reach out and take Johnny’s hand. He’s so fucking surprised that he drops the damn key.
“Johnny,” you say. “You can tell me. Are you in trouble?”
“What sort o’ trouble?”
“Simon. Is he good to you?”
“Bastard eats my cereal and leaves the empty box behind, but aye, he’s good to me. Better than good. What’s all this about, hen? Simon locking me out? I only asked him to, that’s all—let’s me practice with the key, so I can open it on my own again,” says Johnny, stroking his thumb along your knuckles.
You let go of him like you’ve been burned, face mortified. “Oh, God. I’m sorry Johnny. I misunderstood. Let me just—”
You bend down and retrieve the key, handing it to him. You can barely look him in the eye as you mumble a goodbye and rush past him into your own apartment, shutting the door solidly behind you.
Johnny stares after you for a long moment, key held limply in his hand, mind far from the door. At last, he puts the key back into the lock.
Twist, pull.
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one reason (white) queer people misuse the term homonationalism is that they see queerness (or whatever you want to call it) as naturally disaffiliated with the US empire. so they understand homonationalism as a divergence from a natural mutual antagonism between queerness and empire. they talk about homonationalism as if it's an exclusively "normie gay" project, and as if it's a divergence from, rather than a consequence of, the overall trajectory of western lgbtqia+ politics. ironically it’s that self-exceptionalization by the queer, on the basis of their queerness, that imbricates them in homonationalism. they produce themselves as a homonationalist subject, and reproduce homonationalism, every time they articulate their queerness as individualized freedom. and Puar actually anticipates all of this in her original theorization of homonationalism in Terrorist Assemblages, and that's why it really helps to go to the text instead of osmosing queer theory solely through tumblr posts (esp when tumblr is so white and the queer theorists are not): "Some may strenuously object to the suggestion that queer identities, like their 'less radical' counterparts, homosexual, gay, and lesbian identities, are also implicated in ascendant white American nationalist formations, preferring to see queerness as singularly transgressive of identity norms. This focus on transgression, however, is precisely the term by which queerness narrates its own sexual exceptionalism.
While we can point to the obvious problems with the emancipatory, missionary pulses of certain (U.S., western) feminisms and of gay and lesbian liberation, queerness has its own exceptionalist desires: exceptionalism is a founding impulse, indeed the very core of a queerness that claims itself as an anti-, trans-, or unidentity. The paradigm of gay liberation and emancipation has produced all sorts of troubling narratives: about the greater homophobia of immigrant communities and communities of color, about the stricter family values and mores in these communities, about a certain prerequisite migration from home, about coming-out teleologies. We have less understanding of queerness as a biopolitical project, one that both parallels and intersects with that of multiculturalism, the ascendancy of whiteness, and may collude with or collapse into liberationist paradigms. While liberal underpinnings serve to constantly recenter the normative gay or lesbian subject as exclusively liberatory, these same tendencies labor to insistently recenter the normative queer subject as an exclusively transgressive one. Queerness here is the modality through which 'freedom from norms' becomes a regulatory queer ideal that demarcates the ideal queer. ... I am thinking of queerness as exceptional in a way that is wedded to individualism and the rational, liberal humanist subject, what [Sara] Ahmed denotes as 'attachments' and what I would qualify as deep psychic registers of investment that we often cannot account for and are sometimes best seen by others rather than ourselves. 'Freedom from norms' resonates with liberal humanism’s authorization of the fully self-possessed speaking subject, untethered by hegemony or false consciousness, enabled by the life/stylization offerings of capitalism, rationally choosing modern individualism over the ensnaring bonds of family. In this problematic definition of queerness, individual agency is legible only as resistance to norms rather than complicity with them, thus equating resistance and agency.
... Queerness as automatically and inherently transgressive enacts specific forms of disciplining and control, erecting celebratory queer liberal subjects folded into life (queerness as subject) against the sexually pathological and deviant populations targeted for death (queerness as population). Within that orientation of regulatory transgression, queer operates as an alibi for complicity with all sorts of other identity norms, such as nation, race, class, and gender, unwittingly lured onto the ascent toward whiteness. ... To be excused from a critique of one’s own power manipulations is the appeal of white liberalism, the underpinnings of the ascendancy of whiteness, which is not a conservative, racist formation bent on extermination, but rather an insidious liberal one proffering an innocuous inclusion into life."
Jasbir K. Puar, Terrorist Assemblages: Homonationalism in Queer Times (2007)
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Open mic night was Eddie’s favourite night of the week. It wasn’t often that the group was able to make the drive up to Indy but everyone was finally available this time. Gareth, Jeff and Grant were going in his van. Steve was taking Robin, Argyle, Jonathan and Nancy. Steve hadn’t seemed too interested when Eddie had invited them but he owed Robin something and she forced him into being their designated driver for the evening’s festivities. It would be the first time the groups would be mixing and Eddie was incredibly anxious about it.
He loved Gareth, Jeff and Grant but they had no filters whatsoever and even though Steve might not be a douchebag anymore, he had still been King Steve and that didn’t just go away because they had fought interdimensional demons together. He also couldn’t explain to the guys the real reason he was hanging out with Steve without mentioning said interdimensional demons. So. Eddie was anxious. But it was open mic night and he was going to hope for the best. He fucking loved open mic night.
“Tell me again how you became friends with Harrington?” Grant asked from the back seat.
Eddie couldn’t help but sigh, he had explained (lied) to them all multiple times but they could sense that something was missing from the story.
“I told you! Henderson introduced us. You know how he always went on and on about him, had to see for myself.”
“And you hit it off? Just like that?” Jeff asked.
Eddie shrugged. That was the story and he was sticking to it.
“But why did you have to invite him to open mic night?” Gareth whined.
“Chill out. We’re going to have a good time,” Eddie said as he reached for the radio dial. He turned the music up louder, ending the Q and A portion of the ride.
When they pulled up at the bar, he saw that Steve and the rest of the gang were already there and waiting outside. He parked the van and went to meet them. Steve was standing a bit off to the side, arms crossed over his chest, scowling at Robin. He looked good. A simple black t-shirt showed off his arms and tight acid washed jeans showed off his ass. Eddie assumed Robin had helped him pick the outfit, he had never seen Steve wear black before. Nancy and Johnathan were holding hands and leaning into each other’s space and Argyle was finishing off the last few tokes of his joint.
Robin spotted him and the guys and waved them over.
“Hey, Eddie!” she said with a bright smile lighting up her face.
Eddie tucked one hand into his front pocket and used the other to wave back. “Hey guys, this is Grant, Jeff, and Gareth,” he said pointing at each of them in turn. “This is Robin, Nancy, Johnathan, Argyle and Steve.”
Introducing them all to each other might have seemed a little silly – they did all go to high school together. Well, except for Argyle – but it felt right, too. Eddie wanted them to get along and making introductions felt like a new start. They all nodded at each other, somewhat warily before moving to the door. They didn’t intermingle – group lines still clearly demarcated and Eddie sighed.
Wayne was good friends with the owner of the bar, so he let Eddie and his friends drink a bit. Usually just a pitcher or two of his cheapest beer, which was completely fine with him. Beer was beer as far as he was concerned and he wasn’t going to complain when he was getting it for free while he was still underaged. The place wasn’t too full yet, he liked to arrive a little early so he could get a spot near the front of the stage. He got everyone settled at the table and then dragged Jeff off to the bar to help him with the drinks.
“Hey there, my main man Moe,” Eddie sing-songed as he approached the man behind the counter. He was Wayne’s age with wrinkles around his eyes and grey in his hair. He and Wayne went way back, the best of friends even though they were complete opposites. Where Wayne could be quiet and standoffish, Moe was charismatic and brash – they balanced each other.
“Eddie!” Moe called back and smiled widely at him. “Good to see ya, how’s Wayne?”
“Wayne’s great! He says hello.”
“How many glasses?” Moe asked as he started to fill up a pitcher of beer. “You brought a big group this time.”
“Oh, uh – nine!... Please.”
Moe set the pitcher on the counter before turning to grab and stack a bunch of cups. Jeff picked up the cups and Eddie took the pitcher.
“Thanks, Moe.”
Moe waved him off, still smiling.
He and Jeff made their way back to the table. Eddie was pleased to see that the two groups were intermingling a bit when he got back. Robin was chatting with Grant and Gareth, which made sense – they probably had the most in common. Johnathan and Nancy were sitting side by side, listening. Argyle was currently a space cadet, staring at the popcorned ceiling like it was the night sky. And Steve – well Steve had his arms across his chest and was leaning back like he wished he was anywhere else. Whatever, he could be a grumpy goose all he wanted. Eddie placed the pitcher in the center and Jeff started handing out the cups.
“So, what’s the King been up to since graduating?” Gareth asked and then took a sip of beer. Eddie rolled his eyes. The question was innocent enough but the way Gareth asked it made it sound like he already knew the answer and it couldn’t be anything good.
“Family Video re-opened, so me and Robs have been working,” he said and shrugged, taking the question and the way it was asked in a surprisingly good stride.
“That’s it? Working at Family Video?” Grant chimed in with a smirk.
Everyone could read between the lines of what Grant and Gareth were saying – the great Steve ‘The Hair��� Harrington, King of Hawkins High graduated but going nowhere – Working a menial service industry job that he probably hated. Eddie didn’t know if Steve had any other plans. He knew Robin and Nancy were all set to go off to college once they graduated but he and Steve had never really talked about their life goals. Maybe he was happy with an easy job and no stress. There were worse things, he supposed. But he also couldn’t imagine getting stuck in fucking Hawkins.
“Yup,” Steve replied. “That’s it.”
“That is not it, Steve!” Robin said from across the table. “Why don’t you tell them –” Her words were cut off when Moe walked onto the stage and announced that open mic night had officially begun.
A cheer went around the room and usually Eddie would be the first one to go up to the mic but he wanted Robin to finish her sentence. It was clear she wasn’t going to when the cheers finally quieted and a man from the back of the room approached the stage. Eddie listened but he found himself distracted; he hated mysteries. Puzzles needed to be solved or else he felt them like an itch in the back of his mind. He would need to bring the conversation back around to Steve later so he could find out what else the man had going on.
When the first performance ended to polite claps, Eddie jumped up to go next. He loved putting on a show. Moe always had an acoustic and electric guitar on the stage for anyone who wanted to use them. Eddie grabbed the electric guitar and strummed a few chords, testing it out before he went up to the microphone. He usually stuck to more rock and roll songs for open mic night over the heavier stuff he performed with Corroded Coffin. It was nice to be able to do both and he loved it when the crowd sang along with him. He finished his slowed down version of For Whom the Bells Tolls with an exaggerated bow.
A few regulars he knew went up after him. Jeff did a great acoustic version of Number of the Beast which Eddie had not expected to work at all. Robin and Nancy did a Blondie’s song together that wasn’t half bad. They had nice voices, and Robin at least managed to stay on key. Blondie was no joke.
They were on their third pitcher, the mood at the table loosened as they talked and sang and drank. Eddie and Steve only had one beer each before switching to sodas – a stipulation of Moes that anyone he brought to drink had a safe drive home. Eddie had never bent this rule, he appreciated Moe giving them a space to come and drink and he wouldn’t get him in trouble by driving drunk.
“Steve! Your turn!” Nancy yelled.
Steve shook his head. “I’m not getting up there. I’m only here because Robin made me come.”
Jeff and Gareth shared a look between them, rolling their eyes.
“Afraid to sing in front of us, Harrington?” Eddie asked. He knew that Steve wasn’t afraid of anything. His dumb bravery would put the strongest barbarian to shame but sometimes heckling worked and Eddie really wanted to hear him sing.
Steve just leaned back calmly. “Not gunna work on me, Munson.”
“Steve,” Robin whined and stretched out his name, “you have to sing.”
“Nope,” Steve responded.
Robin leaned over so she was practically in his lap and squeezed his cheeks together.
“You have to sing, Steve,” she said with the utmost seriousness.
Something passed between them because Steve’s eyes got large and frightened and Robin snickered. She had something on him! Something he didn’t want her to tell them and she was threatening him with it. Good job, Robin!
Steve sighed deeply before heading up the stage as the crowd hooted and hollered.
Robin leaned back in her chair with a satisfied smirk on her face.
“He’s probably going to sing Tears for Fears or Abba or something,” Eddie said to the group.
“My money is on Madonna,” Nancy chimed in.
Robin snorted. “Duran Duran!”
They all laughed.
Steve grabbed the microphone and took a deep breath, looking out into the crowd. His first note echoed in the room and the talking and laughter ceased immediately, all eyes turned and focused on the stage.
I get up in the evenin’ And I ain’t got nothing to say Come home in the mornin’ I go to bed feelin’ the same way I ain’t nothin’ but tired Man, I’m just tired and bored with myself Hey there, baby, I could use just a little help
Not a sound could be heard from anyone in the room as they all listened in rapt silence. Steve’s voice was ethereal, perfectly pitched, beautiful. Eddie had never heard anything like it.
You can't start a fire You can't start a fire without a spark This gun's for hire Even if we're just dancin' in the dark
The thing was, Eddie liked Steve. He was a better person and friend than he could have ever expected of the former king. But he was a surface level person, what you saw was what you got. He could be sassy and mean and didn’t seem to dive too deeply into his own feelings. Steve was simple and he liked simple things. He was Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington for Christ sakes, he could not have the deep well of emotion and pain that he was conveying in this song.
But he did.
And he was.
Eddie turned to Robin and hissed in her ear as quietly as he could, “did you know about this?”
But she was looking at Steve just as dumbstruck as the rest of them and slowly shook her head.
You sit around gettin' older There's a joke here somewhere and it's on me I'll shake this world off my shoulders Come on, baby, the laugh's on me
Steve was baring his goddamn soul. And maybe Eddie had still been judging him too harshly on who he used to be – because they had fought a fucking war together. But it had always seemed to just…glide off Steve. They must have missed it – the darkness and loneliness in his eyes that Eddie was seeing now. They were all seeing it now. Nancy and Robin were both staring at him like they had never seen him before. Eddie was ashamed. How often did he lament people for thinking they knew him? For judging him on his looks before they even tried to know him? And now he had done it, too. But this was worse because Steve was his friend… and he hadn’t seen it. He had seen a piece of the man and assumed it for the whole.
Stay on the streets of this town And they'll be carvin' you up alright They say you gotta stay hungry Hey baby, I'm just about starvin' tonight I'm dyin' for some action I'm sick of sittin' 'round here tryin' to write this book I need a love reaction Come on now, baby, gimme just one look
This blew all of his preconceived notions out of the water. Steve was singing like his goddamn heart was breaking and no one in the world understood him. It was a masterpiece and Eddie was floored. Absolutely floored. He had heard Dancing in the Dark a million times. But Steve… The way he sang it gave the words such a deeper meaning. It was beautiful and haunting and pained. It changed everything about the song… and everything he thought he knew about Steve Harrington.
You can't start a fire Worryin' about your little world fallin' apart This gun's for hire Even if we're just dancin' in the dark Even if we're just dancin' in the dark
He held the last note, beautifully pitched, before he let it go. The room was silent, everyone as awestruck as Eddie. After a pregnant pause everyone erupted into cheers and whistles and Steve dropped his head as a blush starting creeping over his cheekbones – his hair falling over his face. Adorable.
Oh. Oh no.
No. No. No.
He did not just think that.
Appreciative eyes followed Steve as he made his way back to their table and Eddie bristled. He wanted to growl and bare his teeth at them all.
“You have the voice of an angel, my dude,” Argyle said.
“Thanks man,” Steve said as he sat back down.
Robin immediately attacked him, shoving him and screaming, “what the hell was that?”
“You wanted me to sing! So, I sang!” he yelled back.
“I didn’t know you could sing, Steve! Why didn’t you tell me?”
Steve shrugged. “Never came up, I guess.”
“Never came up!? Neve came up?” Robin’s voice kept increasing in volume and incredulity. Eddie was right there with her. “I am betrayed! Betrayed, Steve!”
Steve rolled his eyes at her dramatics. “Calm down, Buckley. It was just a song.”
“It wasn’t just a song though, was it?” Nancy asked quietly.
Steve tensed up and ducked his head but not before Eddie saw something dark move through his eyes. He wanted to ask if Steve was okay, wanted to drag him somewhere quiet where he could talk to him and ask him questions and find out what was behind his eyes – what was behind that song. Eddie wanted to split his skull open and peer inside and learn everything there was to know about Steve Harrington. He couldn’t take his eyes off him, was begging desperately in his head for Steve to look up, to look at him, too.
Who are you, Steve Harrington?
Eddie’s mind itched at the unexpected puzzle.
Part 2
#steddie#steve harrington#stranger things#eddie munson#Steve Harrington can sing#steve x eddie#robin buckley
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cw: love as violence ig. fluff. implied physical injury although reader is okay now. bad things happen to trees.
Chopper had warned you just before you set out for this excursion, and frankly, the perpetrator of the destruction himself admitted it to you as he held your hand with trepidation present down to his fingertips, but you hadn’t really expected things to look quite this bad.
What should be lush, green forest just feet away from your last skirmish on the edge of the island you docked on, appeared ruined by something not quite human - trees collapsed, their trunks struck and splintered just above the roots, others unrooted completely and laid on their sides, grass torn up in large clumps and the very ground sporting large gashes in certain places, cracked earth arising from imprints of fists overcome with emotion and nowhere else to let it out. Stepping over rubble and larger split rocks, some of which you could tell were displaced far from their original positions, you could almost imagine Luffy in your mind as he tore through the forest.
An expression of grief, the same grief that kept him by your side tense and terrified as you came back into consciousness.
But the earth suffered for it. You stand at the border and there is devastation for at least a mile. The question of ‘why didn’t any of you stop him?’ bubbles into your throat but you swallow it down with the bile that rises along with it.
You can tell Chopper is watching you carefully for guilt so you take a deep breath, trying not to let your surprise and concern be written all over your face. A bag of small seeds gifted from Usopp sits heavy in your pocket. The gash in that same side still stings intermittently but it’s mostly healed, enough that you can take this walk without being carried, something you’d insisted to Luffy and he hadn’t argued about once he realized where you were going.
You wonder if he’s actually embarrassed. Shame is something that is so foreign to him, but this… your eyes drift over a patch of crushed wildflowers… this is understandable.
“He stopped once we got your pulse back,” Chopper murmurs.
“Mm.”
You continue to walk through uneven terrain, using the side of Chopper’s Walk Point form to remain steady. Without the canopy of overhead trees, it feels much warmer at this time of day. After a few more minutes, you start to reach the untouched edge of the forest. The sharp demarcation between the two landscapes appears almost ethereal, and you kind of wish you could take a picture, but have nothing on your person but the seeds and a water bottle.
You take a mental image, then slowly drop to your knees. Right at the border, you plant a couple of Usopp’s fast-growing plants, and they start to sprout almost instantly as you set them on the ground. Chopper follows suit, placing a few medicinal herbs in strategic areas, in case any of the fauna or other people want to use them.
The two of you work quietly outwards into the wreckage, placing new shoots in undisturbed patches of grass. Chopper helps you move some tree trunks and larger rocks out of the way, while you use your Devil Fruit power to clear other debris and clutter and repair as much as you can.
It’s when you’ve crouched to plant the twentieth sapling that you can feel a gentle hand wrap itself around your wrist.
“Don’t do any more.”
You’re surprised you didn’t hear him coming for once, maybe missed over the sound of branches snapping as they were being moved out of the way by Chopper. Luffy isn’t smiling, but he doesn’t appear angry either, just purposeful. He points over to a stump in the corner.
“I know you’re tired. Just sit, I’ll finish planting and cleaning up my mess.”
The crack in his voice makes it clear that he needs you to say yes.
Without further question or resistance, you nod, handing him the half-emptied pouch in your other hand. He helps you stand.
“I love you,” he says as you pass by him. He hasn’t yet let go of your hand. When you look at him, you can see a plea for understanding in his eyes.
Please forgive me. I know it was stupid. I didn’t know what else to do. Don’t get tired of me.
When you’d teased him, your eyes fluttering open atop the medical cot, reminding him that he should be nice to the trees because the trees didn’t hurt you, you had missed the split second of true fear in his eyes.
That you’d be the one to decide he’s too much to handle.
Your forehead presses affectionately against his, pressing the top of his hat onto his head so that it shades the both of you.
“I love you too. More even.”
His eyes light up.
“No way.”
You chuckle.
“Way.” You take a step back, rubbing dirt on your hands on the side of your pants. “Get working though. Chopper’s taking a break, too.” You throw your head over to him. “Right Chopper?!”
“Huh?!” he asks, having missed your entire exchange, likely intentionally.
“Come sit with me, Luffy’s got it!”
Luffy’s eyes widen, but you grin, and he smiles instead in response. Chopper raises an eyebrow but Luffy’s hand extends, palm open for his pouch of seeds too.
“I’m gonna clean up, you guys just wait, okay?”
Chopper glances at you, but then sees your reassuring smile then nods.
“Okay!”
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can I just say how much I love! your!! writing!!! I wasn’t really a Starscream or Bluestreak fan before because I have a tunnel vision on Bumblebee but stumbling upon your account made me adore them so much!! I like how neat your writing style is even though you make it as bullet points because I’m usually not fond with bullet points style, however! Something about how you focus on the description and “show not tell” the most is sooo tasty idk how to describe it. Thank you for your wonderful writings 😔🙏💕
Thank you! The bullet points were mostly a way to clearly demarcate a view point shift since these are snippets rather than anything fully fleshed out. Normally, I’d only head hop every other chapter in a paranormal romance manuscript, but that wouldn’t work here.
Also: Pleasure to Meet You by Motion City Soundtrack is my theme for this fic

Everything is Alright pt 34
IDW Starscream x Reader
• Watching you walk over to your stash of human things on his desk, a little more tension eases. Everything right again, even though he’s fully aware of how fragile it is. That worry still there eating at him, a dark tide just waiting to crash down on him. But not at this moment. You offer him a little smile as you drape that old cleaning cloth he first gave you about your shoulders. Like a ghost, Soundwave’s disdainful ‘inadequate’ floats through his processor.
• Somehow going back with Starscream feels more like reality than going home to your actual life had. Like everything else was a dream, less real than this. Because this has become home. Well, not quite if you’re being honest. It’s not this place at all. It’s him and it’s a curious new feeling, fragile. Breathing in the scent of him from your blanket, something settles inside you and you look up as he runs a big hand over his helm, wings fidgeting. “After my rotation, we’ll refuel together,” he says, optics flicking to your dwindling supply of stolen junk food. It’s not a request to share a meal, but a certainty that you will do this. You smile anyway.
• “I’d like that.” You’re smiling at him, happy to be near him. Glad to see him and it almost hurts, a bittersweet ache that he’d almost given this away. Let you slip out of his hands. Reaching down, he runs the tip of a servo over your soft cheek, the touch lingering as you reach up to lay a hand on him. Such a small thing, but it means more than you can ever realize. It takes an effort of will to break that contact instead of curling his servos around you and bringing you to cradle against him.
• There’s an impulse to call out after him when he leaves, and your fingers fist in your blanket to keep yourself still. To not run to the edge of the desk and reach out. He’s not leaving you again. You know it, but that jangling uncertainty is still there. That he might leave and not return.
• You’re back. Soundwave hesitates, feeling that now familiar tangle of emotion at the back of his processor. When you’d just disappeared from his awareness, he’d assumed Starscream had accidentally killed you. It had always been a possibility with the Seeker’s temper. Thought that you were just gone and that loss has twisted about his spark, because as frustrating as the chaos of your mind is, he’s gotten to where it’s familiar. Always just there at the back of his processor, a warm presence he can’t shut out like music softly playing. He’s pushing up from his desk, aware of his cassettes looking up in surprise.
• When the door slides open, you stand up expecting Starscream, but it’s Soundwave. His helm turns, visor flaring slightly as he spots you and strides over. Head tipping back as he reaches a huge hand for you, almost not noticing the faint tremble as his servos curl around you and he lays his other palm on the desk, big frame bowing over you. Silent aside from the ragged sound of him venting. One of his servos slides against your neck over your pulse, but otherwise he’s still aside from that strange shivering. You lay your palms on his hand, staring at that unreadable, hidden face. Had he been worried about you? That fragile feeling you don’t dare examine too closely stirs as you wish you weren’t so very small so you could wrap your arms around him. Around them both, because they’re yours. And it’s worth fighting for.
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Okay, I know we're not here trying to over-compare, but since people have started to do it (because like, it's right there), there are a lot of reasons I liked that scene between Sophie and Harry, and one of them was that "one true thing" would not be the way that Nate described Sophie? Because that's categorically not what Sophie was to Nate.
Thank you @sammroo167!
For Nate, Sophie was a master (con) artist and mystery to solve who then became his (and the team's) compass and partner (in crime). At some point, he got comfortable enough with who she chose to be that he let go of trying to figure out who she was. Looking more at the present and future than the past.
Really the only honest thing left over from Nate's old life was Maggie. He lost everything else, and then he completely aligned himself with the Leverage crew philosophy. He lost his son. He'd lost his mother before the show started. He lost his father, who was also a criminal. His only family became the crew.
And Harry...is a person who has lost but has not lost everything? His daughter is alive. His mother is alive. A lot of his situation is not caused by circumstance the way it was for Nate. He came from lawful good roots and yet aligned himself with lawful evil before he tried to change and met the crew. It's less all-or-nothing for him the way it is for the original crew members. And he does get a choice in what he allows to cross that line, in a way that Nate never really did.
For Sophie, the demarcation is very clear (though considering Sophie's history, I'd take what she says with a bag of salt): "real" life on one side, criminal life on the other. 99.99% of her contacts are other criminals, though she has a flair (as Hardison points out) for having complicated emotional relationships with people on the other side of the law.
And for Harry? We watch him try to accept that line for himself in the finale, that he lives on top of that line now as a result of his own decisions, as a result of what he wants for himself - and conclude that he's mostly okay with that, for now.
As long as the only thing allowed to cross that line is Sophie (with her permission, of course).
#she's his anchor you know?#and by her own admission she's let him become hers#all the bts stuff keeps saying that sophie and harry aren't romantic at all but then they keep coming out and doing stuff like this#at least we know they're always going to be in the polycule lmaooo /hj#anyway even if it's not romantic#it's a great romance#just two people who've loved before and who have very complicated relationships with the truth#seeing truth in each other#sophie devereaux#harry wilson#otp: one true thing#leverage redemption#leverage#and by the way they had to know that we'd look at that phrasing and scream right?#it's too close to one true pairing#like come la see la
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interesting how bloodless the whole kill-butcher-eat billy sequence is. the method of death could have included blood. the meat could have been bloody. none of it was. just a little bit of blood on goodsir's apron and the cloth bags he carries out to hint and what happened in the tent that we didn't see.
very different from david young's graphic dissection. very different from most of the gory on-screen deaths. very different from the drawn-out, painful, bloody ordeal of hickey hacking at his own tongue. it's sort of peaceful by comparison. private, like his blood isn't for us to see. like he's being afforded some dignity not granted to most other characters.
or maybe it's a signal that he's not losing much in losing his life, at this point. there's no bright and lively flashes of red to demarcate life from death; he was so dead already that he doesn't even meaningfully bleed.
or maybe it's sterile and clinical, impersonal — the mutineers are keeping their hands clean of his blood and we're keeping our eyes clean of it. i never met the chicken i ate for dinner; i didn't see how billy gibson went from a guy sitting there to dry morsels on a plate. does the cleanliness of distance save us from anything?
(fwiw i don't really think that's how it comes across. it's stark, but isn't really clean. it definitely isn't impersonal, with how in everybody's faces the camera gets throughout these sequences. if anything, the bloodlessness enhances the impact. this isn't a theatrical moment. this isn't a moment that's going to give us a splashy excuse to look away from the screen. it's similar to how silent everything is — neither hickey nor goodsir makes noise during the death, everyone is quiet while eating. no distractions, no ornamentation. these are moments that speak for themselves. your reaction is simply your reaction.)
it's kind of religious tbh. these scenes are focused intensely on the body, which could very easily be gross, but it isn't really. not visually, anyway. it's mental, emotional. the lack of blood allows for a clean interface between the bodily and spiritual aspects of what's happening with the mutineers during the episode
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