#dissertation journey

[elephantlovemedleys]

just received my results this morning, and i am very happy to say that i officially have a master’s degree in medieval history !!!!!!

[nudibutch]

asking this as a fellow stone with some questions about where that comes from personally. are there things you like doing or imagining on your own but don’t like in practice, or are you stone in most of your fantasies, too? for me I only respond in a stone way when I’m with someone. on my own I like and imagine plenty that I can’t enjoy so don’t really want when I’m with a partner

more the former, like 60/40 or 75/25 (most of my fantasies involve things im not comfortable with with someone else, some of them are stone-specific). there are things i like fantasizing about on my own, but when it comes to in practice i am definitely not as comfortable with it. although i have capital D fully Divested with partners i trust, it takes a LONG time for me to get there (like well over a year), its usually a once-only or extremely rare event, and i havent let anyone touch me intimately or penetrate me in about 5 years (save for my pap smears, lol). i feel like with the right person i could explore that again, but it would take a monumental amount of trust. i think my brain is conditioned to "youre disappointing someone when you say no to this specifically" and i would need a lot of support if i ended up still not liking it.

i also think a lot of it is connected to the fact that ive only recently been touched or interacted with in a way that i DO like, so my body in general is extremely unpracticed/inexperienced with connecting my pleasure to my physicality. i dont think this is a cure-all by any means, but i have a feeling that if i got to a point of trust with someone to be able to do that more often, i think my body would respond very differently than it has in the past.

[cliveguy]

fr the most influential literary experiences of my life are reading dorian gray as a young teen and realising older books (by my little baby standards) could affect me emotionally, AND reading the dispossessed when i was 20 and realising that sometimes when you think you hate a genre you actually just don't know enough about it

[jade-gemstone]

Now, if all the characters in @dr-akeda-amuesments were put into the hunger games, the winner would NOT be Shigeo. It would be Journey. Shigeo seems like the answer but he is a SIMP who is EASILY DISTRACTED and Journey would win I feel it in my bones.

[art-lover-genderhater]

thesis advice forrealsies

[fingertipsmp3]

That last post just reminded me of something honestly mind-boggling that that friend did

[iamgayjesus]

Study of Shadows📝🥀

Pairing: Professor Agatha Harkness x PhD!Reader

Tags: slow burn, possessive Agatha, power imbalance, academic tension, grief and magic, dark academia, angst and fluff, eventual smut, tags to be updated.

Synopsis: A guarded PhD student is assigned to the mysterious and powerful Professor Agatha Harkness. In their candlelit meetings, secrets unravel, and a slow-burning tension grows between teacher and pupil—where knowledge, desire, and possession intertwine in a dark dance of magic and longing.

Chapter One: Between Light and Dark

🖋️Ch. 2 // Ch.3 // Ch.4

You didn’t expect much from your doctoral journey.

Not glory. Not prestige. Certainly not rest.

What you anticipated were the usual ghosts — long nights hunched over brittle pages, ink-stained fingers twitching from too much caffeine and not enough clarity. You expected footnotes that bled into oblivion, your spine aching from chairs too hard and ideas too heavy. You braced yourself for loneliness — the kind that lingers in academic hallways long after the lights go out, when even the walls seem to whisper in forgotten tongues.

What you didn’t prepare for was how easily grief would follow you in.

How it would settle beside you in the library, breathe against your neck in archives, lace itself between the lines of your dissertation. No one warns you at orientation that scholarship and sorrow are twin sisters — that they walk hand in hand through every lecture, every paper, every late-night revelation you mistake for progress.

You didn’t expect your advisor to vanish either.

Three weeks in — no warning, no explanation, not even a professional courtesy email. Just gone. As if they’d walked into the stacks and simply… dissolved.

You asked around, once. Politely. Once was enough. Eyes dropped. Conversations rerouted. One of the senior professors said something about a sudden sabbatical, but their voice cracked on sabbatical like it wasn’t quite the word they meant. You caught a TA whispering that he’d been sent away, but the phrase felt too deliberate to be casual.

And still, you waited.

Until the message came —

just a line of sterile type in your inbox, timestamped 3:11 a.m., the kind of hour that never delivers good news:

Subject: ADVISOR UPDATE

Your research profile has been reassigned. Please report to Professor Harkness this Thursday at 6:00 p.m. (Office 4C, Antiquities Wing).

Attendance is not optional.

No greeting. No signature. No attached explanation.

Just her name.

Harkness.

The one who reads old tongues like lullabies and walks

the campus at hours when the shadows grow too long.

And with it, something cold pressed itself beneath your skin — not fear, exactly, but something quieter. More dangerous. The kind of dread that doesn’t shout, but waits.

You stared at the email for longer than you’ll admit, rereading it like you might unlock a softer meaning the third time through. You didn’t.

You closed your laptop. Sat in the stillness of your apartment for a full hour.

Outside, the city moved on — cars passing, wind shifting the curtains, the streetlight flickering in its usual faulty rhythm. But you sat frozen, aware only of the weight behind that name. Of the silence it summoned.

You told yourself you’d heard the rumors.

But the truth is, everyone had — and no one ever told them the same way twice.

And she doesn’t take students.

You sat there in the half-light of your kitchen, your tea cooling you.

Why you?

You weren’t political. You weren’t legacy. You didn’t play the long academic game with the rest of them, smiling at the right faces, asking the right questions at conferences just loud enough to be heard. You sat at the edge of things, always watching. Always digging.

Still, you knew your work was… difficult.

Not to write — writing came easily. It poured out of you like breath, like blood. No — difficult to touch.

You’d built your thesis like a locked room, every chapter carefully warded, every argument too sharp for casual handling. Professors left it alone not because they didn’t understand it, but because they didn’t want to.

It made them uncomfortable.

And maybe that’s why, when your advisor vanished and the reassignment email came through without explanation, a part of you — a quiet, bitter part you’d never admit aloud — thought:

“Of course they gave me to her.” You exhaled.

Because your thesis wasn’t gentle.

_____________

The day you were supposed to meet her, the world had the strange, alert stillness of a day before a storm.

Leaves curled at the edges, crisp and uneasy. The sky above the university hung low and grey, all color leached from it like a faded memory. The clocktower struck three — slow, resonant chimes echoing through the courtyard — as you stepped across the flagstones toward the North Tower.

No one else was around.

That should’ve been your first warning.

The building itself looked older than the rest of campus — as though it had been moved here from somewhere far more haunted. Ivy crawled thick along its stone skin. Gargoyles watched from high corners with expressions that felt… personal.

You climbed the narrow spiral staircase to the fourth floor, your boots echoing too loudly in the silence. The corridor at the top was cold, despite the season, lit only by wall sconces that flickered with lazy golden flame.

Her door was at the end. Her office.

You hesitated.

The wood was dark, almost black, with an iron handle that looked like it would bite if you touched it wrong. Her name was etched in a brass plate: Professor A. Harkness.

You raised your hand to knock.

The door opened before you could.

And there she was.

⸻

You didn’t expect her to look like that.

Not when she turned toward you, silhouetted against the grey-blue light of the rain-slicked window behind her. Not when her eyes landed on you like a blade sliding into place.

She wasn’t old, like the rumors suggested. Nor was she particularly young. She was the kind of beautiful that made age irrelevant — composed of angles and shadows and something ancient humming just beneath the surface of her skin.

Her coat was still on, black and tailored, high-collared and dusted with a fine shimmer like smoke. Her hair was twisted into an elegant knot at the nape of her neck, loose strands curling down like spells half-finished. Her hands, ringed and bare of gloves, rested on the back of the chair before her, fingertips drumming softly — a rhythm without a melody.

Her voice, when it came, was velvet against your throat.

“Miss Y/L/N,” she said. “Right on time.”

You swallowed. “Professor Harkness.”

The door clicked shut behind you without her moving. You didn’t remember stepping inside.

She gestured towards a velvet chair.

You sat, uncertain. The room smelled of dried herbs, wax, old books. Rain on slate. Something sharp underneath it all — burnt rosemary, maybe. Or binding chalk.

She watched you like a cat might watch a bird that hadn’t realized the window was open.

“I’ve read your proposal,” she said at last, settling behind the desk like a queen slipping into her throne. “Interesting subject. Difficult. Possibly career-ending, depending on how recklessly you pursue it.”

You blinked. “That’s… fair.”

She hummed — not quite approval, not quite amusement. Her fingers trailed across the cover of your thesis file, resting there with eerie familiarity.

“You understand, of course, that words like ‘binding’ and ‘consent’ carry weight beyond the page?”

You met her gaze.

“That’s why I chose them.”

Something flickered in her expression — not surprise. Not exactly. More like recognition.

“Good,” she said. “Then we won’t waste time.”

She leaned forward, just slightly, and suddenly the distance between you felt paper-thin. You could see the silver threads at her temples. The fine lines beside her mouth. The coiled stillness of her — like a spell wound tight, waiting for a trigger.

“Tell me,” she murmured, “why do people make vows they can’t escape from?”

Your breath caught.

And not just because it was the question at the heart of your work. But because her voice had dropped — intimate, intrusive, like she already knew your answer.

You thought of all the texts you’d read. The names signed in blood. The whispered pleas buried beneath layers of formal phrasing.

You thought of want.

Of love that felt like ruin. Of fear, too deep to name. Of devotion that didn’t need to be returned to feel real.

“Because,” you said, your voice quieter than you meant, “they want to belong to something. Even if it hurts.”

Her eyes didn’t leave yours.

“Very good.”

She didn’t blink.

Neither did you.

⸻

When she dismissed you, twenty-seven minutes later, it was with a small nod and the simple phrase:

“I expect progress weekly. No excuses.”

You nodded, hand tightening around your satchel strap. As you turned to go, her voice followed, soft and deliberate.

“And Miss Y/L/N?”

You paused.

“Careful with your phrasing.”

You swallowed, pulse tripping.

“Words have teeth.”

And though she smiled — elegant, amused, all ice and shadow — you couldn’t help but feel that something had already been written between you.

Not in ink. Not in blood.

But in silence.

Something binding.

Something beginning.

______

Hey guys, please let me know if you’d like me to continue!

[oceansoul001]

After 170 hours I've finished Kingdom Come Deliverance 2 and I cannot even start to describe this emptiness I'm feeling now, knowing that there is no more of this great story waiting for me to experience (at least for now). What a wild ride it was and what a surprisingly amazing game, with all the twists and turns of the plot, all the memorable characters that I deeply cared about and rooted for, all the emotions of Henry's journey and all the thoughts about war, revenge, duty, and finally making peace with the past and moving on. The emotional spectrum of the game is astounding - it can so flawlessly switch between being extremely funny or delightfully absurd to being heartbreaking or devastating in the heaviest moments. But as the game’s content is so dense and rich, that writing down all my thoughts would require a whole book, or at least a dissertation, I would like to specifically touch upon one, nomen omen touchy subject. The Henry-Hans romance.

I'm not sure if it is possible yet, but I would also like to skip over all the controversy-driven discussions regarding this romantic subplot, clearly lead in bad faith and mostly by people not even engaging with the game, and be able to talk about this topic and analyze it as it is, without questioning its right to even exist in the game. Why do I focus on this quite small and optional aspect of the game at all? Well, I’m not gonna lie – I always find the RPGs with possible romances more engaging and captivating, as love – as a general emotion, with different shades of it – is in my eyes one of the crucial aspect of any hero. So if we are already talking about the love towards parents or other family members, patriotic love for your country, or king, platonic love between friends and comrades, and then all of a sudden omit only the romantic love, something is not adding up for me. If you want to give me a rich RPG experience, give me at least one good romance option, and I’m sold. But it is not easy at all, especially the “good” part.

But as KCD2 is a very unique game when it comes to its different aspects – like the demanding, slow-paced gameplay, or the unique blend of open-world with more contained main plot missions – it is also very unique when it comes to the romance options, or, let me say it aloud – when it comes to THE main romance option, the most integral romance option, the most naturally developing romance option in the game. The Henry-Hans (optional) romance that we can observe growing very slowly throughout this 100+ hours, is for me one of the best and most meaningful depictions of love in any RPG with player's agency. This relation, even if you opt out of romance, simply has it all - is intertwined with the plot, is rooted in character development and has the possibility to depict characters together during many different situations throughout the whole game. And this is how a good romanceable character should be written in a video game – as an independent character first and foremost, NOT as a character that was created with a sole purpose to serve as said romance option. In this case Hans ALWAYS plays a meaningful part in the story, and ALWAYS shares an important bond with your Henry, regardless of player's decision whether to engage with the romance or not. But many other games seem to forget about that, or don’t manage to create the bond between characters first, before the option to romance them appears.

And then comes the hard to describe aspect of THE FEELS. The slow development of this relation, the steady growth of feelings, up to the point, when you cannot deny it any longer, and when you cannot allow yourself to not act upon them - because of the circumstances, because of this sense of impending doom, that makes all the risks worth taking, as any of you might anyway be dead the next day. Audentes Fortuna Iuvat, remember? The risk that Hans takes in the decisive moment of this relation is THE epitome of his saying, and I don’t believe it is a coincidence when it suits so perfectly to the whole theme of the game and to Hans as a character in general. And this bold risk taking is so gut-clenching and heartbreaking, but also heartwarming in this one stolen moment of happiness that seems unreal. Say what you want, but you simply cannot tell this kind of story, invoke this kind of feelings - without first having two equally developed characters, that the player equally cares for and have cared for before any romance possibility was on the horizon. Add to the mix very real external hardships (all good romances need a hardship to overcome!), that due to the time and place make this relation tragically doomed before it even has begun, and there you have it - one of the most compelling romantic stories I have experienced in a video game, hands down.

And please don’t start with medieval this, medieval that, before you stop and think about greatest medieval love stories (that we know of) – these are always stories of impossible love, of doomed love, of forbidden love. Of two people, that cannot and should not be together because of the class they belong to, because of the promises made, because of duty, because of sin and religion dogma. Don’t tell me you cannot see the comparison between Henry and Hans, and, say, Tristan and Isolde, THE number one medieval chivalric romance couple, where they commit sin against God and betray their King at the same time, every time they are together. Don’t tell me that Henry, who clearly aspires to all the ideals that we associate with knighthood – chivalry, protection of the weak, devotion to land and rightful king, and generally noble idealism, let’s call it – is not the perfect hero of chivalric romance, with Hans being of course his damsel-princess, way above his league, already promised to another and soon to be in a loveless, political marriage, spending parts of the game either captured in some tower or stuck in some castle, having to wait for his knight to safely return to him. It is all there, I am sure not accidentally, and it fits all the themes and motifs known from both actual medieval literature and their pop culture representation SO WELL if you think about it for a second.

And there's one more component that elevates this particular relation to S-tier for me. You can have superb writing, you can direct the most impressive cutscene, you can have the build-up ready - all of these won't matter and won't work if the actors don't sell you the romantic feelings in the key moment. Which I assume is not easy, when for the most part you play other aspects of these characters and probably were not cast with this specific plot point in mind. But here comes Luke Dale, showing us the side of Hans Capon that we have not seen before, with the most heart-wrenching expression of his fears, with voice breaking at the exactly right moment, the trembling, the anger, the despair, but also the tiniest bit of hope - and in just two broken sentences he conveys it all, and it's all so bloody real. It's a masterwork, and I'm so happy that I could witness it in game, even more - become part of this relationship as the playable character himself.

I sincerely hope that the end of the main game is not the end of this subplot, as there is still so, so, so much more to explore with these characters in these circumstances. And their relation is so unique, comparing to popular fiction in general, but even more so in video games, that it would be a great loss to just leave them be as they are at the end of the game. I cannot wait for the possibility to go through more emotional turmoil with Henry and Hans, probably because I cannot even remember when was the last time I’ve fallen in love with fictional characters so much and so fast, as with these two. And as already said, love is the key. 

[authorddreamz]

More Than Words Left Between Us... Part 2! Coming Soon 🤞🏾💨🧚🏾

Listen....I'm on a very strict journey to discipline myself as a writer. So, I'm going to drop this on Friday June 20th, 2025 8 PM CST

The grand opening of Club Juke proves to be too much for Annie. Seeing Smoke interact with other women so soon after reuniting with her sets off emotions she's far too fragile to process.

Smoke, riding a high from his reunion with his love, misses all the signals that their paradise is slowly going from a peninsula to a sinking island.

Preview:

Annie forced a smile to her face as Pearline, a locally known singer, pranced in her direction.

"Can you believe it!" Pearline crooned, cat eyes pulled tight as she grabbed Annie's hand. "I've heard so much buzz about this place opening and it's finally happening."

Annie's eyes shifted from Pearline to Smoke as he stood not too far off, in a close conversation with Stack. "Yeah, umm. It's great. I-haven't heard a thing about it though." Annie allowed the vulnerability to slip into her tone.

Pearline stood straighter, frowning. "You ain't know your man and his twin were opening a club?"

Once again, Annie felt like an outsider in Smoke's world. "Nope." Her lips popped as she returned her eyes to Pearline. "No biggie though."

Pearline's shoulders bounced. "Well, you're here and I saw you two walk in arm and arm. Don't let these hoes shake you. That man loves you down." Before Annie could say more, Pearline walked away.

A task. One presenting itself to be impossible. Each time a woman approached him, seductive eyes and intimate gestures, Annie's pulse quickened. Jealously danced in her gut, unapologetic twist and turns as she struggled to keep the rage from her expression. These emotions although new, were perpetual, undeniably draconian.

How does he do this so effortlessly?

Smoke's ability to unravel her both emotionally and physically deserves a prolific dissertation. Someone...anyone would sit through it, take notes and somehow use it to heal the world or set it on fire. She'd die peacefully as a sacrifice, not wanting anything else.

Rudely, her thoughts were interrupted by the sight of yet another woman approaching Smoke. Annie's eyes took in the deep plunge in her dress, coupled with a slit that left absolutely nothing to the imagination. Manicured fingers curled around his wrist before she leaned in to place a kiss on his cheek. She wasn't the first woman to kiss him tonight and Annie knew she wouldn't be the last.

She couldn't stomach it.

"Fuck this." She grabbed her purse from the table, snapping it close before she started towards the door. The moment she began to move, she knew he was following her, yet she didn't stop in her stride to the exit.

Smoke cut in front of her, gently grabbing her arm before turning her to him. Intense eyes hit her as smoke from his cigar lingered between them like words unspoken. His gaze was centered on her as she shifted her weight in her stance. He stepped closer to her, invading her personal space like it was his to do with as he pleased. His hands moved from her arm to her waist, a gesture of intimacy that didn't hit her the way it usually did.

"Another hour or so before we can go." Smoke stepped closer to her, pulling her into a quick kiss as Annie struggled with returning his passion. Smoke instantly frowned. "Talk to me."

"I was gonnna call a Lyft. I'm a little tired."

He nodded. "Aight. Let me grab my shit and we can go."

"No." Annie grabbed him before he could move. "You should stay with Stack, you know he functions better with you in close proximity."

Smoke's brows touched. "You wanna leave alone?"

"It's a short ride..."

"You going to check on ol' boy?" His brow lifted, eyes hard and focused. Such a contradiction to the loud and loose club goers surrounding them. Loose tension moved between them, silently brewing as their eyes had a standoff.

"No." Annie answered finally. "I'm going home."

"To him?" Smoke refused to allow her to leave without real answers.

"No." Annie groaned. "I'm actually just sick of seeing bitches in your face. I need a break."

Smoke's jaw clenched. "I just had my face between you legs for eight hours, Annie. I plan to put your pussy right back in my face when we leave here." Smoke looked around, confused by her words. "I've been licking my lips so much they're chapped because I can still taste you on my tongue. Your juices still linger in my beard and I ain't doing shit to get rid of them because that's where they belong." He stepped into her, forcing her against the wall. "What bitches are you referring to, my love?"

.....

Friday, I swear! On momma grave! - Stack Moore 🥰

[elephantlovemedleys]

back to research today 🤞🏻

[weisshapt]

finding the "folk" and the "lore" in the folklore of the wwe

do you want to participate in/contribute to the most electrifying master’s dissertation in all of folklore studies sports entertainment? read below to find out how you can!

thank you to @moxleyrollins for helping me find and source footage, and @alistairs for both excellent suggestions and putting up with me throughout the whole process!

i am currently looking for wwe fans to answer questionnaires and potentially sign up for one-on-one interviews regarding their relationship to, experiences with, thoughts on, and memories connected to their viewership of the wwe and professional wrestling. these will be used as data to help bolster my upcoming master’s dissertation project, where i will be arguing that the “lore” within and surrounding the wwe fits the criteria to be considered folklore, and that the wwe universe, comprised of both performers and fans alike, can be viewed as a folkloric group.

i know what you might be thinking: how the hell do you get folklore out of what is essentially a soap opera of violence? well, that was my question too and apparently i’m the first person to ask it because as far as all of my research has found, i am the first to climb this mountain, and by participating, I’m inviting you to climb it with me!

at this point, feel free to skip to the bottom unless you want to go down this absolute rabbit hole with me as well.

now, what exactly am i calling folklore? for starters, everything you see above. but let's take it step by step. think about how extensive of a culture wwe has amassed over the years, and not just for those of us tuning in weekly and for events. how many people do you know who’ve never watched a single match in their lives, but can recognize john cena’s entrance music and can understand what the five knuckle shuffle is, and the “you can’t see me” catchphrase? how many memes have you seen using pictures or gifs of various wrestlers or that one clip of vince mcmahon (i don’t even have to specify which one do i?) or videos using the undertaker bell?

as fans, have you ever thought about how, given all the various jargon, when you talk about wrestling, you’re practically speaking a different language, one unique to those within this specific community? and a whole language it definitely is. i’ve got 220+ words in the glossary portion of my appendices to prove it. material culture? how about all the replica belts, action figures, and various merchandise sold by wwe? what about fan-made stuff like signs, clothes, fanart? and yes, ring gear can and does count (or at least i’m arguing it does) as a kind of folk costume, whether that’s ric flair’s robes, cody rhodes’s red, white, and blue get-up, the wyatts’ masks, and pretty much every look shawn michaels or seth rollins have sported across their entire careers.

the very nature of wwe storytelling adheres to some of the characteristics folklorists study. not only are the plotlines and developments governed by adherence to calendar customs, with raws and smackdowns always leading up to and following in the wake of one of the many premium live events, but the storylines themselves are chock full of motifs straight out of the stith thompson index, constantly utilising tropes of good vs evil/hero vs villain (babyface vs heel), underdogs and heroes journeys. additionally, folklore and the folkloresque are often used as symbols and aesthetics to build up the image of a character and their gimmick.

and the community, from the wrestlers in the ring to the fans behind the barricades? easily checks off the list for attributes of a folkloric group. shared experiences and interpersonal relations, a sense of community, unique customs, rituals, beliefs, and traditions that are preserved and sustained, culture transmitted through group-wide communication and oral traditions (online with the iwc or in-person at events). the only box not checked has to do with size, and that's a point of wider contestation living now in such a technologically interconnected world.

i'll stop here, or else you'll end up reading through what is essentially a prolonged abstract of the entire project.

so what am i actually looking for and asking of the community?

i need members of the wwe community to take a few moments out of their day in order to answer questions about their introduction to and memories involving the wwe, their interest, engagement, and experiences with the material and the performances, their knowledge of wwe 'lore' whether it deals with the wrestlers (in or out of kayfabe) or fans and how they view those anecdotes, and their thoughts on the wwe community as a whole.

the questionnaire is made up, in total, of 10 main questions (one for every era), with an additional checkbox for those interested to note down their willingness to participate in one-on-one interviews, either chat-based or audio-recorded depending on the interviewee's preference.

below you will find a link leading first to an official consent form provided to me by my university. this will involve some level of sharing personal information, however it should be noted that no identifying information will be shared outside of the written project itself, all data will be kept secured on a university-issued cloud drive and will be deleted following the submission date of august 4, 2025, and any participants not wishing to be named in the dissertation itself can and will be anonymised.

upon finishing the consent form, you will then be referred to the questionnaire itself, described previously.

as for the interviews themselves (for those interested and able), those may range anywhere from 30 minutes to 1-2 hours, depending on time constraints and interviewee preference), and will largely focus on expanding on the answers previously provided in the questionnaire.

i hope that's all clear but i am happy to clarify any information for those who may have questions! if not...

click here to access the consent form and the questionnaire

now, for those who may wish to contribute but either don't have time to fill out the questionnaire or for whatever reason don't want to, my ask box and dms are both open for any comments or suggestions for what others might consider "wwe lore." have a moment that's stuck with you ever since it aired? a favorite match or promo? a fan-story you can point me to somewhere online? send it in, anonymous or otherwise! and feel free to share this post wherever you like and/or send it to anyone you believe might be interested in participating!

[ariaxco]

signs you're healing (and they hate it) ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 🧸

healing isn't just green juice and therapy sessions. it's becoming someone people can't manipulate anymore.

and some people really, really hate that version of you.

they liked you better when you were broken. when you were available for their drama. when you absorbed their chaos and made it your responsibility to fix them.

now you're healing, and they're losing their favorite emotional dumping ground. they're watching you become someone who won't tolerate their mess, and it's making them panic.

you stop explaining yourself

old you: "so sorry i can't hang out tonight, i've had such a long week at work and my anxiety has been really bad and i know you probably think i'm making excuses but i promise i'm not trying to avoid you i just really need some alone time to recharge and i hope you understand and i'm sorry again for canceling last minute..."

new you: "i can't tonight."

they're mad because they can't argue with clarity. they're used to finding holes in your elaborate explanations and guilt-tripping you into compliance. now there's nothing to work with.

they'll call you "cold" or "different." they'll say you've changed. they'll try to make you feel guilty for not providing them with a dissertation about your decisions.

let them be mad. your energy is not a debate topic.

you're comfortable with being misunderstood

you used to exhaust yourself trying to make everyone understand your perspective. you'd explain your trauma, justify your boundaries, provide context for your reactions.

now? you realize that understanding is a choice, not your responsibility.

you're not performing your healing for an audience. you're not documenting every breakthrough on social media. you're not explaining your journey to people who weren't there for your pain.

you're just quietly becoming someone who doesn't need their validation to know you're on the right path.

this makes them uncomfortable because they can't control the narrative anymore. they can't paint you as the villain when you refuse to engage with their version of events.

you stop fixing people

this is the big one. the one that makes them lose their minds.

you used to be their unpaid therapist, their emotional support system, their personal savior. you believed that love meant sacrificing yourself on the altar of their problems.

you'd stay up until 3am talking them through their latest crisis. you'd drop everything when they called crying. you'd give advice they'd never take and support they'd never appreciate.

now you've realized: you're not their therapist, their mother, or their rehabilitation center.

when they call with the same problem for the hundredth time, you say "that sounds hard" and change the subject. when they try to trauma dump, you redirect the conversation. when they expect you to fix their life, you remind them that's their job.

they hate this. they call you "selfish" and "unsupportive." they accuse you of not caring anymore.

the truth? you care more than ever. you care enough about yourself to stop enabling their dysfunction. you care enough about them to stop robbing them of the chance to grow by constantly rescuing them.

some people only liked you because you were broken enough to fix them. now that you're healing, they don't know how to relate to you.

you're boring to toxic people

drama used to excite you. chaos used to pull you in like a magnet. you'd get addicted to the intensity, the emotional highs and lows, the feeling of being needed in the midst of someone else's storm.

now their chaos feels exhausting. their drama feels performative. their crises feel manufactured.

you don't respond to every bait they throw. you don't engage with their provocations. you don't feed their need for reaction and attention.

they're losing their power over you, and they can feel it.

when they try to start arguments, you grey rock. when they create unnecessary drama, you remove yourself. when they fish for reactions, you give them nothing.

they'll escalate. they'll try harder to get you to engage. they'll throw bigger tantrums when you don't take the bait.

stay boring. your peace is worth more than their entertainment.

you choose peace over being right

old you needed to win every argument. you needed the last word. you needed to prove your point and make them understand your perspective.

new you realizes that some people are committed to misunderstanding you, and no amount of explaining will change that.

you don't need to win every argument. you don't need to correct every lie they tell about you. you don't need to defend yourself to people who are determined to paint you as the villain.

you choose peace over being right. you choose your sanity over their validation.

this drives them insane because they're used to being able to bait you into arguments. they're used to being able to upset you with their words. they're used to having power over your emotional state.

now you just... don't engage. you walk away. you refuse to participate in their dysfunction.

you're selective with your energy

you used to be available for everyone, all the time. your phone was always on. your door was always open. your shoulder was always ready for someone to cry on.

you've learned that availability isn't kindness — it's self-abandonment.

now you're selective. not everyone deserves your time, attention, or emotional labor. not every invitation requires a response. not every crisis requires your intervention.

you've learned to ask yourself: "does this person add value to my life, or do they just extract it?"

you've stopped giving equal access to people who give you unequal respect.

they hate this because they're used to having unlimited access to you. they're used to being able to drain your battery whenever they need a charge.

now they have to earn your time and energy. now they have to prove they deserve space in your life.

you validate yourself

you used to need their approval to feel good about your choices. you'd seek their opinion before making decisions. you'd look to them for confirmation that you were doing the right thing.

now you trust yourself. you know your worth without their confirmation. you make decisions based on what feels right for you, not what looks good to them.

you celebrate your wins without needing their applause. you comfort yourself through losses without needing their sympathy. you're complete without their validation.

this terrifies them because they're losing their power over you. they can't control you with their approval or disapproval anymore.

you protect your inner child

you've realized that some people are unsafe for the soft, vulnerable parts of you. they've proven they can't be trusted with your heart, your dreams, or your fears.

you stop sharing your deepest thoughts with people who use them against you. you stop seeking comfort from people who caused your pain. you stop expecting emotional safety from emotionally unsafe people.

you become protective of your peace, your joy, your healing journey.

they'll accuse you of being "closed off" or "cold." they'll say you don't trust them anymore.

they're right. you don't. and you shouldn't.

trust is earned, not owed.

why their discomfort is confirmation you're healing

when you start healing, some people lose their access to you. they lose their emotional dumping ground. they lose their chaos companion. they lose their favorite person to project onto.

they preferred you when you were:

available for their drama

absorbing their emotions

fixing their problems

accepting their mistreatment

seeking their approval

questioning your own reality

now you're:

protecting your peace

processing your own emotions

solving your own problems

demanding respect

validating yourself

trusting your own perception

of course they hate it.

your healing wasn't supposed to make them comfortable. it was supposed to make you free.

let them be mad about your boundaries. let them be confused by your growth. let them be uncomfortable with your healing.

their reaction to your health says everything about them and nothing about you.

you're not healing to make them happy. you're healing to make yourself whole.

and if they can't celebrate your wholeness, they don't deserve access to your brokenness.

[madelyncilne]

hi tags, i've debated making this post but here i ho. it's the typical "i hate making these posts because of x, y, z", but for the past year or so i've made various posts regarding my mum's health journey and in april she suddenly passed. so it's safe to say that life hasn't been the greatest on my side of the internet.

i won't go into detail, and to cut a long story short, i have £150 in my bank to last me until i go back to work— and right now, it's looking like that'll be in a few months. this money doesn't include my student grant (after an extension that i have to finish my uni work/dissertation, etc.) but it has limited my ability to work (obviously), along with having to be around for my father who is the only family i have. we're not doing great, and that much is expected. with my father being retired, i am the only person to make money (minus a pension but it's not a lot, and the money we received from my mother's has to last my father the rest of his life). i'm paying rent for my university flat (until my contract is up in july), along with helping my father out, food, necessities, etc.

on top of this tumblr decided to shadow my commissions blog (sebegifs) which is the only way i'm making income (yes, i'm still working on the one commission i owe), which was really the kicker. commissions are still live and open, just paused on the sake of being posted (information here is still valid if you're interested in anything before a new blog gets set up) but if you decide on anything, please message me here.

i'm once again not asking for much— i say this every time but it is true— or if there's really a point to this post, but i just wanted to say that my new commissions blog (fingers crossed) is a work in progress over at @elsgifs (within the next few days all information will be there and live, i'm just having a hard time with focusing on it so maybe this post is rendering itself useless but forgive me i'm also extremely scatterbrained), and i'm more than happy to provide anyone with gif packs, gif icons, rp base icons, etc. that i can (while i'm not in work and need an extra few dollars to pass me by). so any questions about that, please don't hesitate to ask me (chances are if you submit a request it can be set up/released sooner than later)

additionally, my ko-fi is here. i'm not begging or asking for you to donate to me without anything in return, so on the off chance you see this, even a reblog would be nice. i appreciate it, a lot and i'm sorry for constantly flooding the tags when i don't think my issues are nearly as big or as important as half of the stuff going on in the world rn.

[nyrrwrites]

-`♡´- 🪼 — 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐞𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝, 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭.

-`♡´- 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : jake sully �� fem!reader ✘ neytiri

-`♡´- 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 : Love is one you never thought to experience after leaving your vanishing planet, and soon you’d be departing from existence. But that didn’t mean you didn’t want it, and it seems your wants were heard because here you were, on a rare, beautiful planet, with not one but two lovers who bathed you with love endlessly.

Jake Sully; the one who found your figure far more pretty and angelic than any other human in earth, a blunt, impetuous, stupidly beautiful man, adapted into one of the people, Toruk Makto, Olo’eyktan, who had and took his second chance in starting a new life with you and the Omatikaya people’s daughter, Neytiri.

Neytiri te Tskaha Mo'at'ite; bold, fierce, unyielding, devastatingly gorgeous, found surprise in tolerating a simple human’s presence. deeply intrigued to know you, a simple human without an avatar. That intrigue morphed into never ending adoration when she discovered you’re not just some simple person, but you’re hers and his person, beautiful and unique in their eyes.

Seykxel txe’lan, ‘strong heart’, one of the first words she had said to Jake. The phrase becoming the first in the start of the original Sullys’ fortress; Jake, Neytiri, and you. It becomes a reassurance and affectionate name she only utters while Jake’s becomes, “This right here, is a fortress. One without the other is just bound to fall apart, and I don’t ever want to experience that again without my girls.”

You knew your departure was bound to come, but the more happiness and love you were surrounded with, the more it seemed it wasn’t bound to happen anytime soon because once you hit Pandora’s atmosphere, your sickness seemed to have …faded away. Doctor Grace Augustine, a good friend she became to you, wasted no time in trying to figure out what seemed to be the change, especially when one day out in Pandora’s nature that they’d unexpectedly discovered you could breathe in the same air it contained without having to wear a breathing mask. Her curious examination in trying to discover what had caused the sudden flee of your sickness was cut short after her passing, the answer unknown to you all.

You thought as long as you were out of danger, as long as you had them both, you’d be okay. You experienced love, but now you find yourself yearning for more of it — an experience to carry life that embodies Jake's, and Neytiri’s love for you. It is risky, of course, with you being human in a planet unknown to your kind’s pregnancy. Especially with the flaws of your heart, but you’d already tested the limits the moment you agreed to study this planet. And who are they to deny you? They, along with the scientists that stayed behind with the forest people, and tsahik try to make this possible for you, though your heart inhibited this, and it seems your lovers felt the same.

-`♡´- 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 : 46.8k+ ( I got ahead of myself—)

-`♡´- 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞 / 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬 : fluff, evolves MAJOR!angst, handful of emotional parts within this, implied smut though not entirely, mentions of blood, miscarriages, sick!reader, pregnant!reader, health issues, doctor talk, flashbacks, MAJOR!character death Jake having a potty mouth, both love reader so much, like love LOVES her so much, baby!Neteyam and Kiri love their mamas so much!! neglecting infant / child, TWINS, bittersweet moments, angst-y bittersweet ending

-`♡´- 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 :@peachycrime @tsukicores @cazadordetitanes @xstargayzer @sleepgod182 @skeletondeerart @emmaveale123 @spadezrazz @szaontop @rainbowcake1212 @unicornicopia1 @top-crop @innercreationflower @agathaharknessfan96

-`♡´- 𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐛𝐲 : @cafekitsune !!!

-`♡´- a’s note : okay so, bare with me. We’re going to take a journey within this being practically a dissertation!! I recommend a snack and tissues. There’s going to be a handful of flashbacks — from Jake and reader’s first meeting, their second meeting, and then their meeting with Neytiri. I debated on making this a mini series considering how there’s quite a few different sceneries added in this story. I’m going to be blunt, I tried and put my all into this so please, please comment your thoughts, and reblog if you’d like please!!! I truly hope you enjoy this !!

A deep inhale consumed Jake’s lungs, carefully laying his long frame beside your small lathered body to bask in the sight of your bareness beneath the Tree of Souls’ neon glow. On your other side was Neytiri, the azure complexions of her skin bathed with damp as well, a gentle twitch upon his mouth at seeing her nuzzle against you, her movements tender and delicate. The night’s breeze was cooler than previous nights, but it gifted him with the essence combined from the three of you. He attuned to the concept of making love to you both, the sky’s deep blue vastness witnessing and the creatures listening.

“Fuck them animals, alright? My only focus is you and you only.” He’d breathe out while his canines delivered a rather sensual gnaw to the flesh of Neytiri’s thigh while his hand stroked his other wife’s skin. It was comical how’d the Na’vi before him hissed at him through her blissful facade, scolding her husband for his impudence towards the creation of Eywa, but he simply snickers along while you try containing your own amusement and feignedly glared at him, cooing at your feisty wife in hopes to simmer her down.

Observing the proud outcomes from his physical doing produced a sense of satisfaction in him, no guilt or shame following so because well, why would it ? These are his mates, his girls, and as long as there’s no harm in what he does he’s damn proud to have done so.

Dilated gleaming eyes filled with fondness at the sight of you, and there’s no hesitance in his love for you both, but even he knows Neytiri agrees that the sight of you stirs something in them when your much smaller frame is encased between their larger ones. It was more perceptible to see the pleasing splotches depicted across your delicate, clear flesh. It was more mesmerizing to witness how breathless you were, both staring at you in astonishment at how good you did.

“ngaru lu fpom srak?” ( are you well? ) you recognized the stroke of concern in their golden irises, the emotion relevant and always known towards you, and it always ignited your perspired skin on fire the more they both stared at the exact same time. A soft nod is all it takes to thaw their worries away, Jake reaching to hold you close while Neytiri takes part in staring. It still flusters you as if it’s the first time; his impassioned touches, her ardent gaze, everything they do is just solely them, they’d practically perfected not only doing the simplest of acts but having you feel them deep within. The softness in Neytiri’s eyes scrutinizes your entrails in the most profound manner, absorbing everything you were in this very moment, and everything you desired to be. You enjoyed when she did this, studying you radically, never deficient in its ferocity.

And Jake … well where to begin with him when he touches you? He’s one to display physical affection, no matter the surroundings, no matter his title. He provided you with the heat you craved, the protection you needed; the fulfillment of touching you was something he always took advantage of doing, loving how the wide expanses of his palms splayed across the petite length of any part of your body, letting his long fingers curl around the warm skin with as much delicacy as he could muster. The ability to touch you stirred the poor man though; in the way his tail swayed in anticipation, his heart thumping fervently, his ears flickering with every breathy sound you gifted him with, pupils blown out at the view. It swelled tenfold when his intimate touches enveloped you whole, burning every ounce of flesh upon you in the most exhilarating way.

He knew, they both knew this, and they carry no hesitancy while basking in their affects to decompose you so.

“Why do you two do this to me?” A soft giggle rose from you, failing to keep still between them while being practically tortured from their overwhelming acts, and Jake grinned deliberately at this while Neytiri’s warm laughter met your ears. A heartily sound she accommodated for her mates alone, only ever letting herself go when in your presence. A faculty of a dream it was to you — to be marveled at by two angelic like creatures, and yet it hits you that this is your reality.

Neytiri’s smile formed a soft pucker, pressing against your glistening temple. “There is a problem with staring at you, lovely girl?” Your head shook in response, a hum rumbling up your throat in hence of Jake’s fingers ascending up your bare side, winding around your hip to pull you out of Neytiri’s grasp.

Spectrums of gold and green glitter those honed eyes of his, emphasizing the mirth and happiness he was feeling in that moment. “Then we do this because we enjoy it, angel.” The nickname angel was something he’d grown fond of calling you, defending his claim on the word by saying, “well, what can I say? I thought you were like an Angel to me the second we first met. That’s so wrong for me to think you're that pretty?” it earned him a full on laugh and a playful smack across his stomach. He didn’t mind, and you didn’t pry him to stop calling you that. It sounded nice, the way it descended from his lips.

While he practically had you splayed over his body, Neytiri had slid even closer to you both, her kisses continued meeting your temple, used to the way she’d always do it when it was the only patch of skin unveiled from the exomask you’d been required to wear before. When the revelation of you no longer needing that mask, Dr. Grace Augustine had you wear it still to see if it would affect you in some sort of way and just in case you reacted badly to being without it, and you wore it for a few months before she realized you didn’t need it anymore. You find it amusing how they forget they now have full access to your bare face now, the feeling growing when they waste no time in touching you there, puncturing each of your features with firm kisses like how Neytiri was doing now as she discreetly turned you away from Jake.

“Hey, quit stealing her from me.” Your laughter met Neytiri’s mouth, your line of vision being greeted with the smile he gave her. He shifted onto his side, arm falling around her waist and tugged you both flush against him.

Her head turned away from you and towards him. “You stole her first.” Her glaring expression made him chuckle, and you watched as he leaned his forehead into hers, the surface of their noses meeting gently. “Truce.”

You smile softly and rest your chin down on Jake’s chest, your eyes following the movements of his ears twitching from the breath delivered from her parted lips. It’s truly a moment to witness when he folds upon both your presence. The way he gives in at times, practically liquifying in your palms with the sensations he feels from them.

His arm suddenly tightened around you both, very careful in pressing your body into Neytiri’s front in awareness of her toned belly, in awareness that perhaps another would fill her womb. You faced her, “You’re okay?” She huffed out a chuckle and laid a palm over your cheek. “I do not think anything bad will happen, ma Y/N. And we have participated in other activities and this is what you worry about?”

Jake’s and your shoulder lifted in unison, “yes?” A kiss was delivered to his cheek, and he passed it on to yours. “ it wouldn't be wrong to think that you should have one?”

Jake’s words, and their consonants alike, seemed to have knocked the wind out from your lungs as you gaped between him and Neytiri in shocking disbelief. “One as i-in a child?”

“Yeah, why not?”

Your eyes widened. You had even felt every muscle in Neytiri’s body tense against you, the new knowledge surprising you both. It has been 3 months since she gave birth to the firstborn, Neteyam te Suli Tsyeyk'itan. A healthy hearted, full and beautiful baby boy every one of you fell in love with the moment he came to view.

“You'd like to hold our baby boy, angel?” Jake had spoken, a shocked smile upon his lips at the sight of his firstborn squirming in his hold. You’d wasted no hesitation in reaching out, his stubby body perhaps being the size of a human toddler when he was handed to you. He was hefty to carry, yes, but it had been worth it for the second he gazed at you with those round eyes and his little fingers twined around the length of yours, something ignited within you.

During the months of her pregnancy, it had generated a newfound interest in your heart when you learned from the Tsahik what occurs during a Na’vi’s gestation process. And then, to everyone’s shock, your dear friend’s avatar, Grace Augustine had been impregnated, a beautiful baby girl adopted by the three of you, named Kiri te Suli Kìreysì'ite. Precious and pure she was, and somehow she formed a great attachment with you. There it was again, that pure desire to bore.

Even before, subtly bringing up the topic of babies from time to time. The desk in your former tiny room of the old RDA having infant books sprawled across its surface, an old memory book you happened to bring along opened to the parts of your own infancy.

“Imagine holding one just the size of your palm, Tiri? Right, they're smaller than Na’vi babies, Jake?” You had squealed, a bright smile stretched across your face when Jake’s head had popped into your room. He’d only chuckle softly and nod before telling you both to accompany him back to the village while Neytiri sighed and you pouted cutely.

While both had been very cautious about you residing in Pandora after the war, Jake had been more apprehensive than hers, being a far more palpable thing. It’d been present in every decision made, in arguments that sometimes didn’t include you yet were about you between him and Neytiri whenever the topic of amplifying your family beyond Neteyam, you, Neytiri and himself.

“Ma Jake, if this is what she desires, do you not think we should grant her this?” She’d insist, her heart deeply aware of your longing for motherhood. “We don’t know if her health will falter its improvement—”

“Exactly, we don’t know. No human has ever been pregnant here, let alone one that’s not healthy. Grace couldn’t finish checking her, and I don’t wanna risk it. I — we can’t risk her, Neytiri. ”

His perturbation wasn’t unconscionable to her, though. She had heard from him, from Norm, and partially from Grace of your well established dreams to carry and birth life, and it was fully supported by her; she understood your yearning, and yet she also understood the residence of her husband’s focus where the complications that could assist pregnancy.

They both were debating whether or not to possibly ask the scientists that had stayed behind with them if they’d be willing to help, but she’d been more hesitant in that apartment because she didn’t have full trust with human technology. Denying you was something they never enjoyed doing, and she wasn’t fond of it either, but she had to agree with Jake that they couldn’t imperil your health.

“Just promise me you won’t … try motivating this. Neteyam and Kiri are enough for us, for her.”

“And who are we to decide for her ! and what if she takes it in a different way–”

“Neytiri. I’m not saying to talk badly of it, but don’t push it, please.”

She doesn’t understand fully, how he manages to cautiously creep around the subject and she sees how it vexes you how leading her to feel the same, especially when you both were mindfully aware more additions to your family was something he wished for as well. Apprehensive of your wellbeing incited his impedance, and despite her wanting whatever it is you wished for, Jake knew she had resistance in her motives as well due to the loss of her sempul and her home. Grief was something he hadn’t been able to process thoroughly for there’d been war, there’d been choices that postponed him from feeling it, but now the probability of experiencing it and the reason being of your loss was one they both weren’t fond of.

You understood them and their reasons, which is why his words jolted through you. It wasn’t common for either of them to lead the topic of a child– because it was always you who brought it to the surface.

“What’re you two up to? This better not be some joke.” You glowered at him, then her, then him again. The edges of Jake’s eyes had channeled from his smile, watching as Neytiri’s perplexed face turned a bit … gentle. Irritation fueled in you at the silent conversation floating between their gazes, words whispered in each other’s minds and you wished right there and then to smack Jake just because.

“Forget what I said–” is what sat at the tip of his tongue but his wife’s look of injunction spoke otherwise, and he inwardly collected his words as she took lead, having a slight understanding of what he meant. “We are up to nothing, my love. We know this is something you’ve dreamed of for a long time and we want all your dreams to come true.” They both wore a smile, Jake’s more broadened than her petite one. You stared longer at him though, because he’d been the one more shut off with this, and then at her. This wasn’t one of their ploys, not when they looked at you this way.

Neytiri’s effortless way in using her words to reassure you is something you’ve yet to grow used to. “H-how long have you been up to this?”

His laughter met your ears but was quick to suppress it when Neytiri’s glare –unknown to you– was shot his way. “Yes, Jake? About how long have we been thinking about this?” It was then you realized she hadn’t been informed of his plans, and you followed along with your own look of suspicion though not without giving her swift one as well.

He cleared his throat, propping his arm up so his cheek now rested over his palm and looked at you both. “Want my honesty?”

“No shit Sherlock.”

“…What she has said.”

“I didn’t really think about it. Not in a committed type of thing, well not before like how you two want to until … well a few minutes ago when we did the deed deed.”

Your brows rose and Neytiri’s mouth twisted. “ You mean to say when you happened to be inside of our Y/N?” A giggle was shared between you two women, and he had to hold back the eyeroll that was building up. “Okay, when you guys say it like that it just sounds like I’m some pervert–”

Your giggles erupted into full on laughter and it led Jake to groan loudly, flipping onto his stomach and buried his flushed face into his arms. “Look I just want another kid with you–Y’know what, I take it back–”

You looked up at Neytiri, releasing one more giggle before she pushed him onto his back. You smiled and crawled onto his abdomen, raising his jaw to look at you. “You’re adorable, y’know that, skxawng?” Humming, his hands carefully finding their niche over your hips. “Yeah, I kinda do.”

You laughed, gently kissing his lips before hunching over to repeat the same on Neytiri’s as she rested her cheek on his shoulder blade. Your weight slid down his torso until your head found solace in the beating within his chest, the hitched thumps his heart created, and your lips curled when Neytiri’s palm twined around yours and pressed it to her chest, being met with her own unnatural heartbeat reflecting his; irregular and thrilled they were as it always was after sex. And of course, so was yours, though slightly more steady. It was abnormal though, the difference your heart outdid anyone else’s, for that matter. Between them, you felt a hint of balance within you, for how can your heart not be fine when it pulses in sync with your mates?

“Tiri, love, what about you? You want us to have another baby?” You queried, deeply observing her and she nodded softly. The dark braids cascading down her shoulders fell to her back when she sat up, palms fully enveloping your face. The gleaming specks upon her cheekbones flickered much brighter under Pandora’s glow, accompanied by the tender curve her lush lips stroked. It’s unfair sometimes how breathtaking she is, enough to draw you close to tears, which apparently do so.

The pads of her thumbs lightly dabbed away crystalline–like tears that settled beneath your eyes. Her feline-like nose nuzzled against the bridge of yours, “Srane, tiyawn.” (yes, love.)

“A baby I’ll have.”

She nodded once more along with Jake. “A baby you’ll have.”

You glanced down at your lap, chewing on your lip. “Are you sure, you two? You both know how much I’ve been wanting this, how strong i feel about this—”

Jake’s mouth skimmed across yours, each of their hands cradling your cheeks. The contact startled you yet as instincts, you melted right into them. “ This is something you want, right?” You nodded, and he smiled, “Then who are we to deny you, baby? We want what you want.”

He nodded his head at Neytiri, and her palm fell from your cheek, expanding fully over your chest. “Your heart is twined with our own, seykxel txe’lan. We, with the will of Eywa, beat as one. Your desires are our desires.”

Jake’s lips curled over his teeth, baring them into a wide grin and led your hands to each of their chests. “So have a baby with us, angel. Yeah?”

Your smile was one brighter than anything Pandora had to offer, face carrying the whole definition of infinite happiness. “Yeah.”

His laughter reverberated throughout the night sky, hoisting himself up to encase you and Neytiri in the tightest and warmest of hugs. Her breathy laughter joined his, and your giggles followed along when Jake kissed you, hard. Before your eyes fluttered closed, you could see the toothy smile Neytiri portrayed, head tilting to the Tree of Souls and softly whispered, “Thank you, Great Mother.” before she joined the gentle assaults in kissing every part of your face while his lips stroked down your body; the curve of your jaw, the side of your neck, the length of your arms. The next thing you know, your back is firmly pressed into Neytiri’s chest while Jake’s mouth strode down the flesh of your tummy, an usher of praises filling your ears as his tongue found its destination between your doused essence once again. You didn’t retaliate from them, giving yourself to them as your fingers card through Jake’s long locs and nestled your face within the angle of Neytiri’s neck and your euphoric cries from the saccharine sensations of your mates consumed their senses as they demolished you, and each other, entirely.

Being confined to a wheelchair for the rest of his life wasn’t precisely what Jake intended for. He still wanted to live, wanted to be free in his abilities to do whatever he desired, though apparently being diagnosed with paraplegia can greatly affect one’s plans in life. There were debts he couldn’t afford to pay, such as the surgery that could perhaps mend his damaged spine. Damage caused by major conflicts and deployment to Venezuela while he was there as a Marine. Ex Marine. Tommy Sully, also known as Jake’s twin scientific brother, had tried convincing Jake in letting him guarantee enough money for the surgery so he could get back up on his feet.

“I’m not some kind of charity fund, Tom. Back off, I don’t want any of your geek money. Don’t expect me to start walking and give you a hug in excitement.”

“Will you let go of that damn soldier pride and just let me help you, moron?”

Jake refused, especially given the harsh nickname to which Tommy could only sigh to, thumb rubbing over his tight temple. “At least stay in this hospital during the time they tell you to.”

Wasting his life in a hospital — which happened to be connected to his twin brother for some reason— for 11 days wasn’t on the agenda either, and yet here he was, strolling through the stark hallways of this specialized hospital in hopes to find some kind of distraction from all that’s been happening. Joining the United States Marine Corps came with severe consequences, apparently.

An abundance of this building was not only a hospital but some kind of lab, Jake noticed, and it immediately clicked in his brain that Tommy had been one of the scientists upon these teams to construct this. He didn’t want to return to his room just yet and see Tommy standing there, asking him where the hell has he been, so he continued exploring various wings of the facility, a curiosity seeping through him at what his brother had been up to.

There were rooms in which patients were physically injured; prosthetics taking place of a retired soldier’s flesh arm and leg, another with a similar case of being paralyzed though this one was quadriplegia, and illnesses he didn’t have a familiarity with, and that once peeking curiosity was washed away by the waves of melancholy and distinguish. He’d admit he didn’t enjoy feeling this way at all, but it was expected considering the field Tommy had described working with. He could only smile so briefly at the patients that caught his gaze in hopes of some sense of comfort.

Jake’s hands were growing used to pushing the large wheels on each of his sides, trying to ignore the sting of soreness that came along with it while he rolled himself down different paths. He then found himself going through a children’s section, and it twisted something in him, frowning at the thought of them suffering through things that weren’t supposed to occur to them. While the world had evolved into something advanced, it was menacing as well due to the ones now in charge, shaping the world into something dimmer. These kids shouldn’t have to pay the price for that, he thought.

Then there was a ward of infants, and that warped a different sense that the other wards he had previously traveled through. A tiny sense of hope, tinged with sadness, resided in his chest. The chance of them surviving in this new world seemed no good, if anyone asked him. He really shouldn’t be there, thinking what would become of them. But he couldn’t help staying in front of and leaning into the glass window, chin jutting out and peering at the newborn babies behind it, and he couldn’t resist the smile crawling onto his face.

“You guys were born in the wrong time,” he whispered, words fogging the brim of the glass. “You need good caring.” A finger rose to it, its pad gently swiping over before lingering there for a moment, right beside where a baby’s gentle face came to view. Never was he one to desire children, and even if he did it seemed to come with difficulties now that he became paralyzed from the waist down. Still, it didn’t take away the astonishment he felt when looking at them.

Amongst his awe, a proximity of a presence grazed beside Jake, and accompanying this presence came a fragrance enriched with citrus-like and something floral. The combination was potent enough to tug his attention.

Jake’s gaze transferred from the babies up to the body of a young woman standing questionably close to him. They both were the only ones present in front of the window, and there was plenty of space for the both of them to stand a good amount apart. He knew he shouldn’t be one to talk, but he grew entertained at how she had to hitch up on the points of her toes to peer farther into the window, completely enchanted by each of the three rows of babbling infants and their soft squirming. She looked cute, if he was being honest.

Cyan eyes observed her: a gown colored stark white draped her form, similar to the one he wore, stopping just right below the ankles, and the ex marine smirked slightly at the long socks hugging her feet; mix-matched colors yet fuzzy enough to distract from the distinct coloring. The color of her hair was bold, brilliant and adorably disheveled. The complexion of her skin was a little pallid, but he could make out the warmness of her skin’s color, stealing the man’s air he once inhaled.

Jake had never seen eyes so wide, so alive. Those very eyes scanned the babies’ tiny writhing bodies that were carefully enveloped in blankets, an adoration and something he recognized as a want within them. The girl right before him, portrayed a beauty that was too fucking rare for this world. Too delicate, too angelic and pretty, as though she was created to astound. She astounded Jake, the satirical comment he had made earlier of walking out of excitement returning to his mind, thinking that it may actually come to life if he kept feeling this way and looking at her.

Every muscle in him halted movement, and despite the efforts to wrap his fingers around the wheels and push, his hands remained still over them, wheels steady over the gray flooring. Jake’s lips compressed into a thin line and his eyes continued watching the woman smile — that damn smile — and felt his heart practically leap out of his chest.

“I agree with what you said.” Her voice, soft and sweet, steady and spoken to him, chirped as she held onto the steel metal of an IV pole. Soft and sweet, a sound he’d never been used to hearing but now, he found himself absorbing it, clinging onto it.

His silence was terribly loud and thickening, and he blinked. Swallowed. Then repeated the action a few more times. Say something, dipshit. “Yeah?”

A light chuckle burned through his ears, rattling his heart. “Yeah. But you wanna know what makes it easier for them to get the care they deserve?”

What the hell were words anyway? Jake thought as he searched his brain for a response to her question. Her smile was full of mirth as she saw his reflection on the window, how his mouth moved then closed, then opted for a small nod.

“It’s easy to just fall in love with them at first glance. I mean, who’d deny these pure babies?” She questioned in disbelief, and if Jake was sure he wasn’t delusional about it, he saw how she scooted a bit closer, her forearm brushing his shoulder. “And I’m sure they love you immediately, and when you realize that they do, that this tiny human is capable of loving you and needs you, it isn’t hard to provide them with care and love.”

Jake bobbed his head once more, not sure how to respond to such words, simply staring at her stunned. Stunning was another thing that fit her, he was sure of it.

“That’s how life goes, yeah? Well, if life was with a bit more….simplicity that maybe it’s possible. Love could, and can be more simple. Am I right?” She didn’t once look towards Jake’s direction, her pretty face focused on these newborns she loved so much the entire time, and it surprised him how much love could build in such a short span of time. Then of course, he didn’t know her. Maybe she’d been here longer than he has, for all he could make out.

He muttered a small ‘yeah, you are’ with a jumbled up mind, trying to process each word, memorize every syllable uttered in them. He felt confused, unrecognizable to why he’s behaving in such a way. Well, he knew why; he was captivated by a pretty, very pretty angel’s presence. But this angel didn’t brush his presence off though because of his condition, she acknowledged him very ordinarily. Foreign was the sensation, and the precipitance of its arrival startled his nerves.

The woman finally turned, slightly dipping her head down and glanced at him briefly before looking back at the babies, and Jake noticed how the back of her hand pressed into his bicep. Weird but comforting it felt for him. He wanted that weirdness to last a bit more.

“Well, see ya.” Two words and she, along with her touch, was off. The only thing left of her in his atmosphere was the aroma she carried.

Jake found himself enjoying this, inhaling deeply while faintly smiling to himself, “See ya.”

She was long gone by now, but her affinity lingered there and in his mind. He returned to his room later that day and of course, Tommy had been there, Jake’s smile still noticeable, and his brother couldn’t help but raise a brow, “So now you like the hospital?”

He only smirked, leading himself to his lanky bed to avoid his flushed face from being seen as he recalled the angel who was the cause of it, “Loving it, actually.”

The morning after that night, Jake had awoken without mentioning it; gently shaking you and Neytiri awake, informing you both that you had to head back to the village and Neteyam and Kiri who had stayed with his grandmother. Neytiri, to your surprise, didn’t speak of it either. She did have a hinge of frustration in her eyes, but kept a soft smile nonetheless.

You did, however, catch them having one of their silent conversations over your head on the way back. Once you had arrived, Jake had gathered his firstborn in his arms while pecking his head, Neytiri cooing at him as he sported a gummy smile before extending his arms out towards her. And Kiri, she was entirely focused on you while Mo’at held her, stretching her little arms your way. The moment you carried her with a wide smile, you caught the glimpse of their expressions, Neytiri’s pointed stare while Jake’s stayed neutral though the tension radiated off him. Mo’at had still been present, her forehead creased at her daughter and son-in-law’s shifted behavior. The Tsahik glanced at you in question, and you gave a small eye roll to say, ‘ nothing major’ which she caught onto. She did have a particular idea of what was the reason towards this, but she wanted it to hear from you considering you are the main part of it.

The topic was neglected during your morning meal, with Jake tugging you out of your spot between them and onto his lap as always, and Kiri on your lap while Neytiri held Neteyam on her own, her free hand slipping through yours, as always, while you all dived into your food.

You watched them, longed for their words only to be proved useless when Jake settled you down and placed a quick kiss on each of your heads before attending to his duties as Olo’eyktan. And Neytiri … she didn’t even attempt to bring it up either. Simply either going on with other topics, asking you to assist her in duties, or doing a few of her tasks on her own, later on heading out after placing a soft kiss on your temple and leaving you with the babies in your arms.

His little fingers wrap around your pointer one, round amber eyes looking at it in wonder while his pure babbles floated as if speaking to you. “ you’re quite the talker for a newborn, aren’t you, baby boy?” You cooed, and this he stayed silent at before his baby talk grew louder and as he adjusted himself in an almost straight sitting position. It was normal, you'd have been told, for babies of Pandora to become more adapted after a few days of being birthed, it still astonished you every time you saw the two wide awake, heads turning fully and inspecting their surroundings. You glanced at Kiri, chuckling to see her chin dipping down when her hands found a firm grip around the handcrafted necklace Neytiri happened to woven, just for you. You stared at the two with a small smile, being so wrapped up in your wandering mind that you didn't even realize Mo’at had entered, approaching you and her grandchildren slowly.

“ Ma‘Ite, ‘upe lu tìsraw ngeyä?” ( daughter, what is the matter?) Mo’at crooned softly and your eyes snapped up. She’d taken part in calling you ‘daughter’ following the mournful events of her husband, of her home, and of the battle against the ‘Sky People’. She didn’t care if you were one of them, she valued the way you cared for her people, for her daughter, and you never expected becoming so close with their spiritual leader and be so favored by the people, yet that became your life.

“Nothing, Ma Tsahik.” You glanced down at the two, your legs criss-crossed as they both were supported by not just your arms but legs as well. You lightly moved your legs beneath the babies’ weight earning a tiny squeal from Kiri while Neteyam beamed. You smiled and lifted your head only to be greeted with her narrowing her eyes. “Do not contempt me with formality, child.”

Your head slightly dipped, “I’m sorry, ma sa’nok. ( mother ) I didn’t mean that I’m just…” you paused, chewing on your lower lip for a moment. “I’m just frustrated. And confused.” Mo’at now settled down beside you, hand falling to stroke the patch of dark hair upon Kiri’s head and she’s quick to look at her grandmother, smiling brightly before returning her attention to the accessories around your neck.

“About?” She pressed, a warm smile turning into one of concern and awareness from your silence. “Is it my daughter and Jake?”

You bobbed your head, blowing out a deep breath. “I’m married to two stubborn people.” A low hum left Mo’at, motioning for you to hand her Neteyam.

“I’m sorry,” you added, grunting when you lifted him up. “You are getting heavy, ‘Teyam.” You playfully glowered at him when he was in his grandmother’s arms, and he heaved out a soft giggle from the sensations your fingers created to his sides. “I don’t mean any offense towards Neytiri.”

Mo’at chuckled softly, propping him on her lap, “Do not apologize, while my daughter is smart, she can be very thick headed when she wants. And as for Jakesully… it is common for him to be that way. But I am a mother, Y/N,” She explained, face softening as she looked over Neteyam’s familiar features, then at Kiri’s. “I notice the small things, even with you. We may not be the same species or from the same world, but Eywa placed you in our people, my family, my care.”

“I have known you for a fair amount of time,” she continued. “What age were you when you first arrived?”

“19. Well, 5 years had passed, so 24.” She nodded in acknowledgment, “And now you are 4 and twenty, though physically you are around 9 and ten, correct?” You nodded, “Srane, ma sa’nok.” ( yes, mother ) She smiled triumphantly at her knowing, “ I have heard of this sickness of yours from Grace, how it has been with you throughout your entire life until you came here. Perhaps this is not what you want to hear, but if you think your mates are stubborn, then you have not been paying close attention.” She softly chastised.

“But, sa’nok, I do pay attention, believe me I do! I understand that they’re worried and—” you’re quick to be cut off by her firm tone of voice. “But at the same time, they do not have authority over what you wish to do, Y/N. If you want to bore children, and if they have already given you three the opportunity to try, then you have the right to confront them about it. Do you understand, ‘ite?”

A long finger tilted your chin up, and your mouth quirked at her words, nodding. “Irayo, ma sa’nok.” ( thank you, mother ) She returned your smile, head bowing. Your brows suddenly furrow, peering up at her in question. “How did you know—”

“Tsahik, child. Do not underestimate my role.” She quipped, a flicker of humor dancing in the very eyes your mate inherited. “Besides it is written quite clearly across their faces whenever they see you with the children.”

You laughed, “Fair enough.”

Her hands engulfed Neteyam’s sides, tugging him away from her garments that he found entertainment in fiddling with thanks to Kiri, and lifted the boy up. “Ah, look at you…” she murmured softly. “The eldest, and then there is you, ma Kiri,” The little girl stared up at her grandmother, ears twitching at the sound of her name. “…it would only be fair if you had some sort of company equal to your size, no?” Your cheeks flushed, smiling widely when they both turned towards you, almost impossibly knowing, and ‘Teyam extended his tiny arms your way.

“So you do wish to have children.” She didn’t need an answer for this, of course, for she was also one to know about your greatest wishes, and supported them greatly. Your eager nod was all it took for her smile to widen, bringing Neteyam back down and placed him on your lap while hoisting Kiri up. “Then it is decided.” Her hand cradled the side of your face in a maternal manner, “May Eywa bless you with your heart’s desires, and that she supports them, and you in every way that is possible.”

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

“Are you serious about this, ma Jake?” Is the first thing uttered by Neytiri the second they are out of your presence. Her voice tried containing firmness, though it lacked from the emotion and perplexity of her husband’s words, from his laid back demeanor when he first said them to the both of you the night before. It wasn’t common for her to not be able to observe his thoughts due to his facial expressions practically tattling them, but now he was awfully silent and too pensive for her likings.

“Jake!”

The tight grasp she gave his arm and the harsh yell of his name blinked him back to reality, turning towards her and is greeted with the mixture of emotions across her precious face; an unsteady balance of sadness and happiness that didn’t know which one to choose, whether for the outcomes or the fact that he’s actually finally approving of you birthing a child.

“What’s wrong, baby?” Her glabrous brows inclined and her eyes broadened in a manner that Jake knew very well meant an injunction to his plastered cluelessness. He unleashed a heavy breath and raised his hand to shove it through his thick locs, “Alright. You got me… I don't know why I said that.”

A smack, hard and full of pain, contacted the skin of his chest and it took everything in him to not subconsciously let out a cuss word in his rather feisty wife’s face. “W-why would you— Neytiri! S-stop smacking me and hear me out—”

“Kehe! ( no! ) You deserve this, how are you going to say you didn’t know why you say what you say, you skxawng!” Her hits met his forearms as they were held out in front of him, stumbling and trying to back away from her. “Okay, baby hold on, just hold on— Neytiri, okay y’know back on Earth there’s a phrase, ‘violence is not the damn answer’ ! Ever heard of it?”

A hiss seethed past her teeth, nose scrunching in distaste. “ Violence seems to be the only way you listen! Or maybe it just makes you more stupid!”

He was now trapped between the forest’s wide trees, he stayed still and her hitting halted for a brief moment, but Jake wasted no time in grabbing ahold of her forearms and switching their positions; a thrashing Neytiri was now pressed against the rich wood of the tree, while he muttered hushed, comforting words in her ear in pleading hopes to try and get her to calm down.

She eventually did, though the familiar stroke of her irritation when they’d first met was there, assisted by other feelings, but that somehow bolded her every pretty feature; confusion to why he’s feigning, anger for rushing into saying things without her consent and hurt for leaving you hanging knowing already how you awaited for them both to bring it up and it tormented her within how she went along with whatever the moron of her husband did.

Cautiously, so very fucking cautiously, he let go of her, one hand falling over her waist while the other gently gripped her chin. “Are we okay now?”

She blinked a few times and watched the confusion and concern riddling Jake’s features. Her lower lip slightly protruded and trembled, and her forehead creased the way it always did when in distress. The trinkets embedded in her braids swayed harshly at the head shake she gave him, and he felt his chest churn at the motion.

“Jake, did you not see how she looked at us?” Neytiri’s heart ached at the flash of your face, throat tightening, and in came the now stinging sensation of tears in her eyes. “She looked hurt, she is hurt because of us,” Her finger rose and punctured firmly into Jake’s chest with every word and tried to ignore the way his face scrunched for a second, “because of how you got her hopes up, because of how I went along with your foolish lies, because of how we both know how much she wanted this! Stupid!”

Wave after wave crashed among Jake’s mind and heart, eyes falling shut as he welcomed the tiny jabs his wife took at him. He understood what she meant, and he understood that she – and you — had every right to be upset with him. He didn’t want to hurt either of you, but he did it for a cause. He didn’t think it’d affect you this much overnight, then again, as his wife said: They both know how much you want this. He knew why she stated what she did, and even he was aware as much as she was of why he stated what he did; he aspires to it as much as you and her do.

The disappointment he felt with himself didn’t help with the abundance of emotions he carried already. He strongly cursed himself aloud for making you feel this way, but there was something more added as to why he did what he did, besides the fact that he was doubtful with your once endangered health.

He swallowed, hard, face easing, “I am sure about this.”

Neytiri’s current finger stabbing his chest came to a stop. “About?”

“She wants a baby,” Jake’s shoulder lifting made Neytiri’s eyes widened. “It’s like we said last night, a baby we’ll have.”

Her lips parted, slowly forming a full ‘o’ that made him want to laugh, and her fingertips raised to cover her mouth with the weight of his words. “Did I hit you too hard?”

This time he didn’t resist the laughter bubbling up his chest, leaning in until their foreheads kissed. “Nah, baby. You hit me enough times to get my act together.” He breathed out, smiling tenderly when her hands hesitated in reaching out for him, curling around his sides, orbs glowing with forgotten tears. “You are serious? No jokes? No delays?”

A wide grin curved the edges of Jake’s lips, his hand shifting to cradle her jaw and the other pulled her close. Neytiri’s breathing hitched at the sound of his chuckle floating through her flickering ears.

His gaze darted between her eyes and lips, not sure which was more worthy of his attention. “No delays, honey. I want this, with the both of you … I didn’t say anything just yet in the morning because I wanted us to give her a little surprise.”

Her head tilted, curious to what he meant. “And that is?” He grinned once more, kissing her softly before gently tugging her off the tree’s surface. “C’mon. Let’s head to the old RDA.”

The glimpse of Jake’s smile reflected from the window in front of him, keeping his eyes on the newborns he’d gotten fond of watching for the past 6 days. Though if someone were to ask him ( that someone being Tommy ) he wouldn’t have admitted the entire reason emitted as to why he kept returning to that particular side of the RDA’s hospital. But to be quite frank, watching them did establish a sense of tranquility within him, an adorable diversion from his main reason to visit.

He’d never been one for patience, but the stubbornness he was born with benefited him well in this case as he strained himself to stay, not lifting a single finger to touch the wheels at his sides. But he was beginning to lose the hope assisting that patience; hope for that young girl’s presence to show up and just let him feel all kinds of things, really good things that he hasn’t felt in a long ass time. While these cute babies slightly entertained him, they couldn’t fill the rest of his mind that had been wholly consumed by her from the moment they first met. During these times of days, they’d be side by side, with her arm occasionally straying near his shoulder while he anticipated it, or he admired the way she transported a tiny, foldable stool that allowed her to sit by him. The usual dread he carried with him vanished with the thought of her, from the rise of dawn to coming nightfall. Even behind his eyelids, once dreamless sleeps were replaced with the bright colors of her appearance.

He exhaled deeply, rolling his wheels back and was about to take a turn to leave until the hallway echoed with steady footsteps followed by a screeching sound of something grinding onto the ground. He grimaced, carefully turning his wheelchair in the resumance of its position in front of the window and there it was, the purpose of his visit; her.

“Leaving so soon, marine?”

She hadn’t glanced or moved towards Jake’s direction as she settled on her white stool but even so, he found himself with his tongue tied and his breath twisted in his gut from hearing her utter only those simple 4 words.

“Well I, uh, was, but I guess I can stick around. Don’t wanna leave you alone.” His chest puffed out and smirked proudly at his ability to form not one but two whole sentences, but he still couldn’t help feeling all warm and gooey inside when the young woman laughed softly at his choice of words. “What? You’re staying by my side now?”

She caught the reflection of his grin, “Sure you can say that.” She hummed and nodded at his words in acknowledgement while he went oblivious to the glee that coursed through her. “So you were waiting on me.” It was more of a statement rather than a question, but he agreed.

“Yeah.” His head slanted slightly up, watching how she looked at those babies with the same expression as always. They stayed quiet for a comforting moment, his deep breath of release being the only thing floating in the air right now.

But while he may have looked as he carried a calm demeanor, inside he was startled when he turned to look at her. He came to terms that he indeed did like her, a lot as a matter of fact, but somehow it seemed like it was more than just likeness.

“So why’re you here?” Curious orbs glanced down at Jake with a spasm of a tiny smile on her mouth.

His brow hitched and gave himself a look over as if the wheelchair he was in apparently didn’t indicate as to why he was in the hospital. She laughed, a sheepish sound he found himself smiling at, “ what I mean is the reason why you’re in that wheelchair.”

He chuckled for a short moment before nodding. “I was a part of the USMC. The United States Marine Corps.” He added, and she threw him a quick glance that said ‘ well no shit Sherlock’ and he smiled briefly. “There were some issues down in Venezuela, and I was one of the many involved that got injured. My spinal cord is messed up … and obviously, ” he patted his thin legs, “these too.”

He saw how her brows knitted together and her former smile turned into a frown. “I’m sorry.” He didn’t like being the cause of that, and he sighed when she said, “did they offer you surgery to fix your paralysis? Isn’t your brother a part of this facility?”

“They did, and he is, but I declined both him and the offer.” His blue eyes caught hers when she glanced at him, letting her gaze linger for a few seconds that felt like eternity for him. He detected a strange strike of something in her pretty irises, something that concerned him until she tore away from him. “ It's been six days since we’ve met. Six days you’ve been coming over here, and not once did you ask me why am I here.”

Jake’s brows rose to his hairline, surprised by the sudden shift of topic but didn’t mind it whatsoever. “Why are you here?” He didn’t mean for it to come off as blunt or disrespectful, but blunt was his voice of nature. He quickly looked at her, not sure if she had caught onto it or not. The thought of why she was here never really crossed his head, he only mimicked the question out of both confusion and hopes to change the topic.

“ I have a weak heart.”

Jake didn’t understand the meaning behind her words. Sure, he wasn’t exactly an expert of human anatomy, hell he could barely comprehend the damage done to his own body. How can she have a weak heart if here she was, standing tall and beaming as if a miracle had occurred right before her very eyes, speaking to him as if normalcy had happened through their lives? “Huh?”

“I don’t have a strong heart, Jake. The world’s air isn’t clean enough for my system, so this hospital is the next best thing for my health. So because of this ‘poor’ heart, I can’t do the things I really, really want. I thought you maybe wanted to know, but never asked just to not come off as nosy.”

“Wait, what? I don’t mean to come off that way–”

She chuckled softly at his dubious expression only for it to grow. Yeah, he noticed the IV pole she tended to have attached with her in every corner she turned, but it never occurred to him to ask her or his brother, which now that he thought of it, he did have the chance to, but that never was his main focus. He’d been so captivated by the way she carried herself and how she had managed to slither her way within his veins.

“If I had the chance to somehow fix the way my heart works, I’d take it.” She admitted, a soft utterance he would’ve found relief in if it hadn’t been for the true translation of her words; “If I was in your place, I’d take that chance.” which unveiled the main translation, “Take the chance you’ve been given, because there’s others who don’t ever receive it.”

“If that heart of yours is so weak, how come you’re able to talk with a lot of meaning?”

Her sudden direct turn made him smirk softly, capturing his gaze for a much longer time than these past 6 days. He let himself admire her full face, noticing how she, too, lost herself in the blue swirls of his eyes, as if searching for something within them. He didn’t plan to ask such a question, but the way she looked at him surged a positive thrill through him. Her eyes diverted from his for a second, face flushing. “ My heart likes to be heard, I guess. It’s the seat of our emotions, isn’t it? Emotions should be heard.”

His smirk morphed into a full on grin now. “See, there it is again. You wanna know what I hear when you speak that heart of yours?”

Her head sloped to the side in intrigue, and it took all his upper strength to not lose his words. “An angel. A very pretty one with a clear voice.” he pointed out, and leaned his upper body closer to hers. “So imma tell you this. I’ll accept this surgery because of this angel, but on one condition.”

His pointer finger stuck out in front of his face and was visibly pleased at the way her twinkling eyes darted between his and the finger between them. “And what’s that?” she breathed out.

The digit that was currently extended in the air was accompanied by the others, and with the permission her eyes gave him, he allowed them to brush across the skin of her cheek. Jake’s grin waived into much gentle one when she leaned into his touch, and his voice was barely above whisper. “That you stop talking so down on that angel’s heart. How can you say it’s weak when her words come from there, sounding so smart and pretty?”

She chewed on her lower lip, corners of her mouth curving upward at the honesty coloring his face. “I think I wanna marry you, Marine.”

“You’d spend your life attached to a wheelchair instead of me, angel.” He chortled while cupping her cheek and enjoyed the way those eyes looked at him, mirroring his own enamorment.

1 week. 1 week, 5 days, and 9 hours had passed ensuing the conversation between Jake, Neytiri, and you about continuing a family, and you getting the Tsahik’s eternal blessing.

Days exuded into scorching afternoons into brilliant nights, and your body sizzled with the passing of time in irritation the longer they proceeded being oblivious to your clear frustrations. Tonight though, you’d decided you’d had enough of the waiting, and enough of this promise that forever remained empty. The foreseeable subject with your mates would be one that manufactured outcomes.

You, with the admirable help of your mother-in-law, prepared their favorite meals; Jake had taken a liking to teylu assisted with vegetables, though if you were to be frank it was like feeding a child, how he picked apart the sweet grub from the vegetables only for Neytiri and you to scold him; while Neytiri was the one who was never critical of what she ate, as long as it was Na’vi’s traditional foods and made with attentiveness, she was more than willing to consume it. Prepping meals for them was one of the many things they admired from you, given their engaged schedule, and making something extra came in handy when you wanted a little something from them. It didn’t fail you before, so why should it tonight?

“Tell us about your day, txe’lan. Are you alright?” Neytiri queried when she took notice of the anxious movement your fingers would occasionally stray to the accessories decorating your collarbones. Seeing this, she reached over, delicately lacing her fingers with yours and gave a small squeeze. She picked up a deep liking to the way your fingers were adorned with multiple silver rings, always toying with them in wonder.

There was a specific one she enjoyed to look at, and it was the one around your ring finger, little fragments of trinkets embedded and shaped into a pair of wings, and the story of how you had gotten it always made her smile softly while Jake would blow out into a full on grin, knowing they were the ones behind the story; sort of like an engagement ring. It was a lovable act from them both, the two of the most lovable mates you could ever ask for.

Trying to sustain a firm demeanor was resulting to be an impracticable goal the longer your gaze stayed fixated on your locked hands, smiling very briefly at how her three fingers wrapped around yours, thumb rubbing gentle circles over your skin. Your smile became inevitable when Jake came into your view, sitting next to Neytiri with Neteyam and Kiri bouncing happily on his lap while both took turns curiously tugging on their father’s dark locs, Neteyam mostly, and very curiously, tapping the accessories Jake had around the middle of his neck. “Hey, watch it,” he playfully scolded, then returned his gaze to you. “Yeah, how was your day, angel? Did these two gremlins give you any trouble?”

Your mouth curled before taking a small and final bite of your food. “It was nice. Kiri was curious, as always, grabbing everything, relentless as usual. Right, beautiful girl?” Her round eyes crinkled in the way her birth mother’s would when she’d smile, and you chuckled softly before turning to the other. “‘Teyam was very good and quiet, right, my little warrior?” He reflected your wide smile, and it took everything in you to not squeal in excitement at how his smile resembled his mama Neytiri’s.

“Thought I was your warrior.” Jake frowned at you, of course he did. You could tell by his tone of voice, by the gruff tone he implied.

You let your eyes flicker up at him, and inside you were now debating whether or not Neteyam looked more like his father or mother by the way his wide eyes looked up at him and mimicked Jake’s pout, Kiri stretching out a tiny fist and pounded Jake’s cheek. Neytiri chuckled, fingers covering her mouth while you squirmed in resistance, only to break in defeat when you caught a glimpse of her beautiful smile. One that crinkled her bright irises, the creases slightly prominent due to her happiness.

“You’re my protector,” you corrected, and he hummed with an arched brow. “Doesn’t that indicate a warrior too?” His stare bounced between you and Neytiri, and you chuckled. “Neytiri is my other warrior, my breathtaking warrior,” you cheeked, laughing when both their expressions were complete opposites from the other. Hers beamed and his frowned. “hey that’s not fair, I can be breathtaking for you—”

“But you are not,” Neytiri chirped, tease edged in her voice as she smirked at the small glare he gave her before looking back at you. “So I’m not breathtaking?” Neytiri’s chuckle tugged one out of you and you couldn’t help but chew on your lip when you looked at Jake. Honed gaze, current frowning mouth tilting slightly up when he realized your expression, and gosh he was beautiful. ‘Stupidly beautiful’, Neytiri had once commented, and he had taken that as a strong complement minus the stupid. Of course he was breathtaking, he himself knew this from the way your face screamed how unfairly gorgeous he was.

“You’re staring, babygirl.”

You glanced down with a sheepish smile. “Yeah, I know.” His smile increased into a big grin as he laughed along with Neytiri until his cut into a grunt of pain when Kiri tugged harder onto his hair. “ Girl, calm your ass down—ow!”

“Do not say those things around babies, skxawng!”

The scene before you flooded your brain with the image of them with an additional child. Little girl, maybe little boy, who shared the same pure mischief as their older sister and silent wonder of the older brother, both containing that happiness that your mates both carried in this moment, squealing, giggling, running across your home’s grounds as Jake chased them, sitting between Neytiri’s legs as she styled their hair, staring up at their parents in wonder while lying between you three in your large hammock, laughing with every lame joke Jake would make while they snuggled into each other’s warmth. They were already wonderful parents given the weeks, almost 4 months since Neteyam’s and Kiri’s birth. They could at least handle one more, given the love and patience they had with the babies, with each other, with you.

“So… speaking of babies,”

Neytiri’s hold on you tightened and you couldn’t decide if whether the twitch spasming the corners of her lips was to contain its act of lifting or falling, while Jake made what could be a grunt in the back of his throat, rising to his feet while cooing whatever talk he could to his kids. “We weren’t really speaking about babies? It started with Neytiri asking about your day, then we drifted to breathtaking and how I am indeed that.”

“I’m not playing, Jake.” You henced, but it seems he didn’t get the message by the mirth in his irises. “Me too!”

“Jake.” Your other lover warned, a stern look when the two made eye contact. Your brow rose at the silence they shared, a sigh leaving him before looking back at you, but the amusement still lied in his face. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel some sort of defeat at how this conversation has started, but gratefully you had Neytiri by your side and the both of you knew very well he always used his sense of humor to shift the subject in a whole other direction. You sensed that Neytiri was about to tell him something more, but the firm clench of your fingers around hers halted her from doing so.

“You don’t remember what we were talking about the other night? What you said so suddenly to Neytiri and I?”

His stare tilted to the sky, this time not fighting off Kiri pulling to his hair as he hummed as if in thought. “We talk every night, and y’know me and my mouth say whatever, so I think one of you should remind me.” Vexation flared into you, rolling your eyes towards Neytiri’s direction, expecting to see her with the same expression you carried only for your annoyance to increase and perplexity assist it from her too bright smile.

Her expression only seemed to have grown when you ripped away your touch from her and stood up. A sigh of exasperation left your lips already comprehending the fact that they were up to something. “You two, I don’t have time for games. Jake, for once, no jokes and Neytiri, please just tell me what’s going on!” You practically stomped your way towards Jake and took Kiri from him, oblivious to the confused babble leaving the baby from losing contact with her dad’s odd hair, while he watched you in amusement when you returned for Neteyam after setting her down in a handmade cradle. She took interest in playing with the material, cooing at it cutely.

Neytiri would be lying if she said this wasn’t at least fun to watch, how riled up you became, but she also wanted Jake to speed up whatever it is he’s doing so they can finally get on with it. “Neytiri, darling, I kinda remember having a talk with y'all. But then again, between our girl making all those pretty sounds and us talking, it’s kind of a blur, don’t ya think, baby?” There was that shit eating smirk stretched across his face, and Neytiri threw him a look of warning when you silently walked away from them with Neteyam in your arms.

You kneeled down to place him beside his sister, a small toy Jake crafted for his baby boy before his birth being the focus of Neteyam’s entertainment as you stood up, gazing down at them with a small smile. The opening tone in Jake’s voice let you know there was more to be added, and it would be a lie to say you weren't curious about where they planned to drive this conversation. But you didn’t look at them, not when you were trying to control your emotions by staring at two of the four sources of your tranquility, because the other two happen to be the ignition of that irritation.

The sound of clinking beads swayed in the air, and just when you were about to turn you felt the tall presence lumbering behind you. You couldn’t help huffing out a chuckle when that presence came down to crouch behind you, the length of two gentle arms wrapped around your torso. You looked down to those familiar arms, recognizing they belonged to Neytiri before even looking at them. Your eyes traced the way three of her fingers twined across your bare stomach, how her palms pushed very lightly into your flesh, and you exhaled. Tension had entangled you up way before she had even touched you, all because of a ceaseless conversation that never gave you anything in favor, but you couldn’t resist mollifying the second your wife touched you — because of course, who would not mollify for Neytiri?

“Neytiri.”

“I remember well what we talked about,” A soft kiss met the angle of your jawline, soon moving down and stopped just right below your necklace before placing her chin over your shoulder, and that unique, earthy smell that was solely her consumed your inhales. “It is unlikely for our Jake to bring up more…babies, or am I wrong, tiyawn?”

“Neytiri.”

Stern was more of a whine in your voice, and when she chuckled, it jittered through you to the point where you felt it to your bones, practically vibrating every ounce of your frustration away. “I know he can be…what you say a pain in the ass, but he is only teasing.”

“Yeah angel,” another voice chirped into the conversation, larger palms sliding just right above Neytiri’s. “You really think I’m capable of forgetting about our important talk?”

“No but you’re capable of changing the subject while Neytiri just stays quiet, and in my opinion that’s even more frustrating than if you forget.”

“Forgive me, my beautiful girl,” Neytiri voiced, and her soft yearn indicated she truly was sorry for her actions. “But, I had reason to do it.”

The hum Jake slurred out practically yelled he had that stupid grin on his face. “If I’ve been changing it and Tiri’s been quiet, you think we would’ve stopped by to visit Norm and the other geeks and made arrangements for next week?”

Your eyes turned big and rounder than they usually were when you swiveled in Neytiri’s arms to look at them, face inches away from hers while Jake stood knelt beside her. “I’m sorry— you two did what?”

“Ya heard me, angel .” Jake carried a wide, prideful smile — Neytiri’s more anticipating your reaction as her tail swished behind her, and it only widened with every passing second your eyes darted between the two, not knowing what to say just yet. When everything clicked, and you couldn’t contain reaching over towards Jake and smacking him hard across the head while lightly tugging one of Neytiri’s braids.

“Ow! What the actual fu—” Two smacks, one accompanied by Neytiri, met his chest this time when Neteyam’s big eyes looked at his father, though Kiri seemed unfazed.

“The first was for making me think you lied,” You looked at Neytiri, “That was for not saying anything,” then back at Jake, “and the other was for almost dropping an f bomb on your kids.”

“Our kids are too young to process what the f word really means— but okay I get what you’re saying …”

“ Our intention are never to hurt you, txe’lan. When have we ever lied?” Neytiri murmured, pulling you back into her embrace while Jake tried soothing the pain of his head and chest. You couldn’t help rolling your eyes at his overreacted tactics, but leaned into your wife, “Never…I think.”

Her thumb and pointer finger gently grabbed ahold of your chin and tilted your head up to meet her gaze. Her tone was softer, steady and hushed the way it always did when speaking only to you. “Then why lie now?”

“We haven’t talked about this in almost over a week and I just didn’t want to push you into something you don’t want.” Delicate as a whisper were your words; each syllable trembling from your lips, hesitant and uncertain as if afraid to be heard. With a slight bow of your head, you almost surrendered to your timidity but your wife was not fond of it at this moment, elevating your chin up once more, savoring the pure beauty you conveyed and the way your lower lip curled between your teeth.

“We have told you; your desires are our desires. Again, forgive me for keeping quiet. I just …” her forehead creased, mouth parted slightly as she tried searching for the correct words. “I didn’t know how to bring it up…how to help give you what you wish. It was wrong to do this without you but…”

“I asked her not to because we wanted this to be a surprise,” he smiled, palm enveloping your cheek before that mischief snuck its way across his face. “Besides, we also wanted to see how long it would take you to crack,”

“I told you, ma Jake. She is better than you expect.” Neytiri grinned, and this time you couldn’t contain your own smile. Jake peered down at the kids and hummed, causing you and Neytiri to looked down as well only to see their eyes fluttered shut, curling into one another as their little mouths parted as soft exhales and inhales rose from their chubby bodies.

“So now that they’re asleep…”

You squealed when he roughly pulled you out of Neytiri’s grasp, Neytiri about to protest until he too lifted her in his arms. “Jake!”

“Shh, don’t wanna wake the babies up,” His long legs carried him to your large hammock with ease. He carefully placed the two of you down, grinning widely. A deep kiss met Neytiri’s mouth, one following yours afterwards. “Let’s try and get one of those things in you, yeah?”

You giggled breathily against Neytiri’s mouth, knowing Jake’s hungry gaze was watching his wives’ every movement right before him as her fingers carefully but so adeptly took off the Na’vi clothing you wore, taking advantage of brushing her touch quite long enough to burn your skin. “Don’t think it works that way with all three of us–”

He smirked deviously, crawling over the both of you. “Let’s test that out, shall we?”

Being one to live as a wheelchair user may perhaps be one of the hardest things Jake had ever experienced. Though what might be worse than becoming a wheelchair user is living as one. Mentally and physically exhausting he cultivated with each passing second of every day, things he never thought to upkeep with his disabled body. It didn’t surprise him, how the current world reacted to what he’d been through and deemed it as if it wasn't something grand. While days were torturous, he’d slowly adjusted to his new way of surviving. It became ... a tad bit easier, though while others weren’t the least caring for his state, they did underestimate his capabilities, his strength, his intelligence and took him for “the man with chicken legs.”

“Your brother represented a significant investment. We’d like to talk to you about taking over his contract, and since your genome was identical to his, you could step into his shoes … so to speak. It’d be a fresh start in a new world. You could do something important. You can make a difference.”

So when the unforeseen moment that he had discovered his twin brother’s passing led him through the Avatar program in return of something highly valued for his beneficence, he wasted no second in consenting to his now late brother’s place.

He had agreed to get surgery, though the process somehow was a bit too long since he had declined at first, and Tommy had said something about handling a few issues before continuing with his surgery, and after the 11 days passed, he was released to go home which perplexed him. That was until learning the cause of his brother’s death, of what were the issues delaying his surgery; opponents in the same field had it out for him, even for the paper in his wallet.

“We’ll provide everything you need for this trip, now go big your goodbyes, go home, gather the few things you’d like to take,” they had told him, “though I doubt you’ll need it these next 5 years.”

He doubted he had anything he’d like to take, there’s not much for him to value and take or had someone to bid goodbyes to. Everyone he knew had parted from his life, chipping away the smallest of pieces that formed some sort of comforting fortress in him, especially her. He hadn’t heard a thing about the girl he adored in weeks. He visited her of course, for many many months; he’d stay long hours in her room, both laid and tightly nuzzled in her hospital bed while talking, but one day she was nowhere to be seen, and no one would give him information as to what had happened to her, if she was out of the hospital. The last thing he heard was that she had another destination to go towards, and that was all yet not enough. So why not take his brother’s place and start anew as they say? He did though, gather a small luggage, received a well and quick haircut, and took his leave.

Jake’s fingers loosely curled around the wheels on each of his sides, strolling between the familiar stark white hallways of the hospital he once had been a patient in to visit to give his form a brief examination and quick feedback in hopes for him to take this procedure to Pandora. And maybe, just maybe, he’d catch a glimpse of the angel he terribly missed and needed at this time.

As he went through the building, he recalled his brother being proud to be a part of this facility, of something grand and meaningful, unyielding passion he possessed to help everyone within this building. “A place to help people with disabilities, small and big. I can be a part of that help, Jake. I can find solutions, maybe even find one that brings this damn earth back to life.” Tommy had told him with the reflection of his exact smile, a small chuckle rising from Jake and acknowledged everything else being said, about seeking solutions to issues that collide on this planet, about traveling light years to some distant moon that could carry them. Ironic to become the brother with the disabilities and now being the one going light years away, he thought.

Typically, visits — checkups — to the hospital were ones he only looked forward to ending as soon as they started, an activity he dreaded in doing so for the very reason that he simply doesn’t want to be sitting in a room with some doctor repeating the constant news as the previous visit: “you’re subjected to this condition for the rest of your life”, “it seems you aren’t progressing anytime soon”, “well you won’t have to worry about a random leg cramp anymore, right?” But today, surprisingly, he looked forward to this checkup. Sure, they’d repeat the same thing of his condition, but this time he had hoped for an addition to those words.

A man, dressed in a dark suit, walked his way. Jake recognized him as one of the guys who’d informed him of his brother’s deaf, seeing a smile pursing his mouth. “Seems to me you’re rather thrilled for this than the last time I’d seen you.”

An exhale left Jake’s nostrils, his shoulder lifting. “Just wait ‘till you see me stand and dance in excitement.”

The man, unknown of his name, sighed at the dry humor, head motioning to the hallway that leads Jake to his appointment. “I don’t think most people here will take your exciting miracle too kindly, especially considering some of them are most likely not able to recover or make it. You’re here to participate in making a difference, Sully. We aren’t here for sarcasm.”

Jake resisted from rolling his eyes as he strolled a bit further ahead of him. “Thought I could at least have fun with this. I ain’t mean it to offend anyone, all I mean is I am looking forward to this.”

The man didn’t know whether to take Jake’s tone as sarcasm or solemnity, simply nodding when he peered a glance over his shoulder as if to say, ‘well, you coming or not?’

After an hour of being in a room, having an MRI and CT scan, then with people from the RDA, doctors, and the suited man ( the news were as Jake predicted — the same, additionally with the other news that he can make the long trip and it won’t affect him whatsoever ), Jake was led through a different hall he hadn’t seen the last he’d been there, leading him to his long flight. He disregarded the peculiar glances hurled his way, a second nature action he’d grown accustomed in doing after weeks tolerating his faith in a wheelchair.

He was surprised to see how many people — more men than women — surged the place, how lengthy the lines were, the employees assisting, checking in, getting everything in order and setting for those who were leaving to be prepared. A few men’s families were present, bidding their goodbyes and farewells. He recognized the fear, the longing hope of safety to be with their parting member, the nerves racketing through while the men tried keeping a steady posture, a neutral tone. He sympathized for them, but there was no doubt that he thought they should feel fortunate to have someone there with them.

There was still quite some time until they attended him, so he took a chance in taking one more stop before he left this planet; the infantry ward. Memories from weeks ago, maybe even a month or so flooded his brain constantly, each filled with the thought of her, Y/N L/N. Of all the randomest topics she seemed to have come up with. Now, even when he sees a baby he can’t help but picture how excited she’d be, how warm her face would turn, how she’d rant on and on about wanting to bore one. Even now as the window before him revealed those newborns, he still illustrates the image of her right beside him, staring at them, then gifting him with those eyes before parting them back to those babies.

The memory of her perhaps was the only thing keeping him from going back into a dark place in his life, from wasting himself nonstop and attending bars that don’t appreciate his presence, let alone acknowledge him. He missed her, missed having that good sensation that only increased when with her. He at least wanted a moment, a chance to say goodbye, to wish her the best. Maybe to have some motive…to stay. Anywhere near her, he’d stay.

That wishful hope for her to come through the halls in all her divine beauty seemed to slip through his fingers as he waited, as he tried grasping for patience. But it only decreased and disintegrated into exasperation, inhaling a deep breath before turning.

“Leaving so soon, marine?”

His head snapped towards the voice, blue eyes widened at the sight of her practically beaming at him. He looked her over, rebreathing that neverending beauty, taking in how she was no longer in a gown, how her IV pole was no longer in her hold. Instead she was in formal wear, and she held a bag similar to his, and that’s when it clicked where your destination was. His heart smacked harshly against his ribcage as she sauntered his way, chewing on her lower lip.

“Well I was, but I guess I can stick around. Don’t wanna leave you alone.” he repeated, smiling up at her as he led himself towards her. There was that giggle that made him feel all kinds of things, and he would’ve scoffed at the way she knelt down to meet him face to face if it wasn’t for him refreshening his memory of that pretty face. “What? You’re staying by my side now?”

He grinned, wrapping a palm around the side of her neck. “Damn right I am.”

His kiss was a great combination of gentleness but desperation, sweet but harsh, yearning but commanding. He didn’t once let her go, if anything he raised his other hand and grasped her face while her hands wrapped around his forearms, trying to keep up with his pace. “You’re leaving.” she breathed against his mouth, and he only smiled while fluttering his eyes open. “So are you, angel.” she exhaled, almost overwhelmed at the sound of the nickname, swollen lips agape near the corner of his own, “In a few. How about you?”

“In a few as well…” his murmur ghosted her skin, chuckling when her fingers skimmed across his scalp in a curious manner, thumbs tracing his temples. “That’s the reason for this new look?”

“Maybe…I also didn’t want to keep looking like Tommy. Like it?”

“I love it…” she hummed before pulling away, a softness falling upon her when he kept his hold on her face. “I heard what happened…Are you okay?” He only shrugged, honed gaze locked on hers. “I’ve been alright…Y’know, this might sound horrible but,” he tugged her close until his mouth was brushing hers, inhaling and letting that floral mist consume his atmosphere. “What was worse than losing Tommy was that I wasn’t by your side at all…and I missed you.”

Her eyes shimmered at his words, though trying to contain her smile. “That does sound terrible, but I missed you too, Jake.” He liked the way his name fell from her lips, how it ignited that fire he felt so wildly with her. Though he did have a sudden intrigue and deep concern. “They’re letting you go with your condition?”

She bobbed her head, “They say that maybe there’s some kind of cure up there…and me being a researcher in this sort of field, I can find out more about it.” her brow rose, eyes widening in a way that made Jake think of her adorable. “I’m assuming you’re going for Tommy?”

“Same DNA, twins, must take his place, maybe I’ll get my legs back…” he sighed. “Something like that.” She hummed, drawing him back in with a soft smile. “Well…at least we’ll get to be together, no?”

His cheek hoisted, oceanic eyes consuming her wholly when he looked between her lips and eyes. “Hell, yeah.” The intimate moment had been cut short, however, when an announcement suddenly echoed through the halls from the speakers up on the ceiling, “Jake Sully, brother of Tom Sully. Y/N L/N. Please appear where you should be for your departure immediately.”

“I’m gonna miss these little ones…” Her palm rose to the glass, lingering there for a moment as a baby’s tiny eyes fluttered open, a soft coo leaving their little ‘o’ shaped mouth. Jake could only smile and nod, “I’ll get you one of them soon.” he jested, and her head tilted his way with a spark in her eyes he was familiar with, but both said nothing afterwards.

The short but entire way to their designated area, they kept close, and it looked entirely odd yet wholesome to others, the way she kept her hand on his shoulder the entire time, the way he glanced up at her with the biggest smile there was for the reason being he had someone not only there but leaving with him as well. Any trace of distress disappeared when he was about to be put in cryptonic sleep, glancing one more time at her only to see she’d already been looking at him with a soft grin.

“See you in five years, marine.”

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

The RDA decreased from view as Trudy Charon, a transport pilot working for the RDA itself, designated her Samson rotorcraft with a proud sense swarming her. Within the craft was Dr. Grace Augustine, her right hand and xenoanthropologist, Norm Spellman, former marine, Jake Sully, and wondrous researcher Y/N L/N.

“All right you three, we need to be careful with this,” Grace, mind already transferred to her avatar body, turned Y/N’s way as she was seated between Norm and Jake who’d also been resettled in their avatar bodies. “especially you, Y/N. You have no avatar, and Pandora’s forest is no place for a mere human being, alright?”

Her chin jutted up and down twice, a smile of glee enchanting her delicate complexion beneath the exomask. Jake could only stare at her with adoration coloring his newly featured amber eyes. He could feel each ounce of thrill bouncing off her being and into his system. He knew that apart from coming to search for some cure, being in Pandora was one of her greatest wishes to grant, and he wasn’t going to ruin this for her whatsoever. Especially with her condition. Right there in that moment, he only wished to enjoy it with her. And of course, protect her because as Grace said, she has no avatar.

There hadn’t been enough time to prepare one for her, and the reason for that greatly included the state of her immune system, her well-being. Grace had mentioned that she needed to run more tests, check if the atmosphere of Pandora would either affect her avatar along with her human body or if she’d be safe. It benefited him with the fact that he had to stay as close as possible to her, though he did have some doubts about Y/N being out in the open in Pandora. As mentioned, her complexion had been very delicate, sparkling eyes gaining a drain to them despite the happiness she expressed. Thanks to his newfound senses, he could hear the gentle thumps of her heartbeat, feel the warmth that radiated endlessly from her body, feel the very light quivers that ached through her due to her health.

His hand, freakishly blue and larger than his normal size, carefully, so very carefully captured her much tinier hand, interlacing his long fingers between hers. Her eyes, currently gazing out at Pandora’s exquisite views, instantly turned towards his, only to see he was already staring at her.

His incisors somehow intensified the charisma of his soft grin, keeping those golden depths on each of her movements. She tracked down the stroke of concern on his lips, the flicker of uneasiness within them, and offered him a much brighter and assuring smile as if to say, ‘I’m okay, really’. She let her eyes stray to their clasped hands, entranced with the way his deep azure tones clashed beautifully with her neutral ones. Every ounce of second thoughts or anxious feelings ceased from existence for she only felt him; the warmth of his wondrously large palm, the laxness of his grip.

She was sure she was in good hands, for the moment Y/N had arrived and made Grace’s acquaintance she was quick to put up rules for her safety, giving her a proper warning to take good care of her health and that her usual check-ups back on earth would still take place in Pandora within the RDA. And Norm, well he respected the researcher given she was young and had great enthusiasm for the world’s rare beauty. Trudy had been informed to take precaution and keep a close eye on the young woman, and she seemed to get along great with her but none of them beat Jake in that apartment. He was a steady balance of overprotective and letting his girl enjoy herself, though she had a vague idea of how he’d act in this planet now that he has regained movement of his legs, recalling how excited he’d been that he was reckless when barging into the lab and lifted Y/N in his arms, ignoring the protests of all the others, especially Grace.

“C’mere, lemme hold you closer so you can see,” Jake murmured, putting his weapon down and lifted Y/N onto his lap before she could even protest. A breathless ‘woah’ fell from her lips at the view of wide stretched and tall trees, eyes falling to the ground only to see a group of ginormous and rare creatures.

“Easy, Jake,” Trudy called from over her shoulder, “If you think it’s high for you tall ones, think how high it is for her.”

“Marine, be careful with her! Don’t drop her, damn it!” Grace scolded, and Y/N chuckled at the way Jake waved her off but tightened his hold around her midsection while nuzzling his jawbone into her now tangled hair thanks to the strong wind.

“I got her, doc. Don’t tell me how to protect her.”

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

Adoration was one of the grandest things Neytiri felt for her home; a habitat that flourished with the wonders of Eywa, arrayed in which greeneries and distinct creatures connect to each other, rely on one another for durability, gifting everyone within Pandora with a new, brilliant day.

Grateful she was to be apart of such environment, proud to hold and be able to carry out the Omaticayan’s rich traditions, especially carrying the role of becoming the clan’s future Tsahik. In the meantime, tsakarem she took part in and being a natural-like warrior, exploring within the rainforests.

Though while she sauntered through and over the wide, long branches, unfamiliar distressed voices were heard, and Neytiri’s curiosity peaked and led her towards it.

Beneath the thick branches and lengths of the green fronds wandered two figures; one who shared the similar species as her though not entirely, seeing how he’s dressed in sky demon wear and his long limbs moved with inelegance, caution against her home, an avatar, lumbering in an almost protective stance over a much smaller body. Another sky demon, female, and apparently average in height for their species, she recalled, watching as she uttered a small remark towards the avatar as they walked deeper into the forest.

Amber irises gleamed between the branches, the pair belonging to Neytiri grew piqued and questioned why two humans here, interfering in Pandora’s nature, in her home. They were misplaced, lost, and could end up tumbling in the grasp of death without proper guidance. She could let that happen, or perhaps she could take matters into her own hands, by positioning her bow and arrow towards them, gaze sharp.

She halted, however, caused by the sounds the male avatar did, a pinch of distress between his brows. Her head turned, unaware of where the female had gone until she spotted her in his arms, eyes fluttering shut behind the mask she wore.

“Y/N, c’mon angel, wake up! We gotta head back, I need you with me, now.”

Her eyes narrowed and flickered between the unconscious body and him, something remorseful twisting in her chest but she tried shaking it away by inhaling deeply, drawing her bow and arrow back once more, at him.

Just when she was about to release it, a woodsprite, known as atokirina to the Na’vi, floated her way, the mystical creature landing on her bow. It astonished the young warrior, soon becoming perplexed until realization weighed upon her. Just testing the waters, the point of her arrow tilted the human’s way, and the woodsprite didn’t move from its spot. Not until she set her weapon down, resisting her questions and giving into whatever Eywa desired.

She didn’t leave just yet though, if anything she kept an attentive eye on the both of them, debating on whether or not to help the male, and felt alert when he reached for the breathing mask over her face and pulled it off in a panicking act, mouth pressing, breathing into hers very carefully. She hissed sharply at his stupidity, and just as she was about to crawl out of her hiding spot, the woman …Y/N had awoken.

“W-what…happened?” Jake’s shoulder’s squared straight along with Neytiri’s, one looking at Y/N with an incredulous expression while the other was waiting for her to collapse any second.

“Why are you looking at me like that? Is there something on my face?” She reached for her bare cheek, brows knitting as she felt around her skin for anything while Jake’s eyes remained wide, waiting for her to take notice of something that was currently missing. “Jake, stop staring like that! You’re scaring — oh my gosh where is my mask?!”

She observed the interaction between the two, tail swaying at the way he had crouched down to her height, gently cradled her close, an amalgam of sentiments resembling horrified and shocked and extremely confused, while he repeated the same questions if she was alright, if she felt well enough to walk, if he had to carry her he would.

“Grace is gonna kill me if she finds out i let anything happen to you.” Her ear twitched at both the mention of her former mentor and the pitch of tone he used, crouching away from eyesight. “Jake, relax. Look at me, I’m fine! Nothing’s wrong, alright? Sure, I can…somehow breathe out here but I'm alive!” Hands, dainty and tiny in Neytiri’s perspective, reaching to practically mush his face between them, a brilliant smile rested upon the human’s features.

“She’s gonna lose her shit when she hears this! I tried being all heroic– coulda’ killed you.”

“You’re an idiot sometimes, y’know?”

He dragged out a hum, his hold careful enough to keep her close. “A big one, now aren’t I?” There was an odd feeling blooming in Neytiri’ body at the way they smiled at each other. While his was broad, goofy, irritatingly likable and his rather small eyes gazed at the girl in endearment, hers was pure, lovely, bright. Intrigue has already sunk its claws deep into Neytiri’s soul at why, out of everyone, did Eywa choose to let them live, and why is it that the girl had collapsed, and why is it that the two before her have some sort of bond she subconsciously felt captivated towards?

That intrigue had spiraled tenfold throughout the day as she watched and followed, precaution assisting her in case the idiot almost risked the girl’s life especially when the forest was unknown and dangerous to them both — well, her more, of course, seeing as he was too stubborn for Pandora’s dangers, though Neytiri was surprised at how well Y/N reacted to everything, ushering the avatar to respect and keep quiet. Sky demons didn’t produce that type of awareness of care for Pandora anymore, or so she thought, and witnessing one of them carry that sprouted a sense of admiration within the tsakarem. She found herself pursuing a small amused smirk at them both, holding back laughter and would scoff or roll her eyes when one nearly tripped or made teasing, incredibly lame remarks ( the male, of course.)

When nighttime set upon Pandora, however, Neytiri’s curiosity disappeared and became alert when a group of nantags surrounded them. “Do not react harshly.” she muttered under her breath, back straightening to have a better look at the scene before her. Of course, it was hallucinating of her to think either of them could hear her, because the lanky avatar had created a flame, trying — and failing — to shield the small person with his body as he yelled at the small creatures, pointing the fire at them in case they launched themselves at her. Instead, they ran his way and he wasted no time striking them with the stick, grunting with the action.

“J-jake!” She was left in the open, exposed for attack when he had fallen over. The fire had been knocked out of his hands and right in front of her, illuminating the fear that streaked her face. Just as one of them found an opening towards the human, Neytiri nearly came out of her spot until the woman tried grabbing ahold of the long, rather heavy for her size stick.

“C’mon, c’mon,” She found an easy grip, fully lashing it in front of her in hopes to scare the nantags away. But the length of the bludgeon outweighed her, losing balance and fell to the ground.

Neytiri finally crept out of the shadows, muttering the words, “Stupid, stupid, stupid.” at the so-called Jake when he stabbed a nantag. She jumped right between the human and two nantags, eyes narrowed and canines bared before she turned to Y/N. “Hand me that, tawtute” ( human ) the Na’vi spoke, watching the girl’s round eyes broadened, the fire’s flare enhancing their color as she looked up at the graceful, tall woman.

She forcefully tried to regard the human with contempt only for the corners of Neytiri’s mouth to fight against lifting at the wonder in her face, how she immediately did as she was ordered to. She ripped her eyes away from her, wincing at the refulgence the flame radiated before casting it into the nearest river before glowering at the animals and reaching for her bow.

The rest was an adrenaline blur, careful not to hurt the human or the avatar as she aimed an arrow towards a viperwolf that lunged their way. 3 had been needlessly killed by her, and remorse gutted her deep at her actions. Her eyes fluttered as she stabbed near the wound of one, its whimpers faint but frequent. “Oeru txoa livu, ma oeyä tsmukan. Hu nawma sa'nok tivul ngeyä tirea. Oeru txoa livu.” With one clean tug, the arrow had been removed, and a shallow breath rose from her chest when she approached another viperwolf.

Was this the purpose for Eywa to let them live? To kill her creatures?

“Where’s our fire?” She heard him inquire in a ridiculously loud voice. “She, uh, sorta put it out, but look! We don’t need it..woah.” Neytiri’s head lifted, her line of vision being greeted with the amazement that gleamed both their faces. His wide eyes were lifted to the fluorescence of the branches and wide and myriad shaped leaves while hers followed the outlines of the many glowing plants, a smile ghosting her features.

A sigh heaved out of Neytiri, trying to resume her focus on the squirming creature, “Oeru txoa livu,”

“Look, I know you, uh, probably don’t understand this, but uh—“

“ma oeyä tsmukan. Hu nawma sa'nok tivul ngeyä tirea,”

“…thank you.”

“Oeru txoa livu.”

“That was pretty impressive,” Jake uttered, the lopsided smile she thought to be stupid but charming resided on his face while he crouched a few feet away from her, and the human had only stayed quiet, inspecting Neytiri’s movements curiously with a tiny smile. She has a clear view of both features, had their full attention and there it was again; that magnetic tug, that rare thrill pulsing through her, only this time much stronger now that they were staring at her attentively.

Warmth blossomed in her chest when her gaze collided with his, and as much as she wanted to refuse ripping away from the two, she fully stood up and took a turn to leave. “H-hey wait a second!”

“Jake, no—”

“C’mon, maybe she can help us.”

The young warrior inhaled a sharp breath when she heard them follow her, hastening her every step. “Hey, wait a second, just slow down—”

“Jake, I don’t think she wants us following her, let’s just leave her alone—” She is not only strong at heart but wise, Neytiri thought as she threaded her fingers through the leaves, gently releasing them after she passed. “ I just wanted to say thanks for killing those things—”

She glanced down when his hand slipped around her forearm, snapping what was left of her thin patience. A sharpness whipped across his face, caused by the tip of her bow when she swung it purposefully at him.

“Ah, damn!” He stumbled down, touching his stinging face and looked at her in shock. The girl rushed to his side with a small stroke of ‘I told you so’. “You okay, Jake?” His head whipped up and his bulging eyes spoke more than enough for her to burst out giggling. “How the hell is this funny? Hurting me is funny— what was that for! All I was gonna do is thank her and ask for—”

“You don’t thank!” The thickness of Neytiri’s voice brought their attention toward her, Jake’s being more surprised at the newfound knowledge of her speaking English. “You don’t thank for this. This is sad. Very sad only.” The point of her weapon was still directed towards him, face etched with bane and what Y/N could only make out as deep offense.

She quickly slipped between them, a small hand stretching out against it. “He didn’t mean it that way. All he was trying to do was express his gratitude for helping us, that’s all, okay?”

Neytiri looked taken aback by her soft voice, lowering her bow as if trancened by the gentleness and panic gleaming in the human’s eyes. She watched how the avatar nodded along and lifted a hand to rest across the girl’s back. “Y-yeah, I’m sorry. Whatever I did, I am sorry.”

Her nose scrunched and her glowing eyes narrowed between them, gaze lingering on him. “This is your fault. They did not need to die, if you listen only to her, kept to self, then they would be alive still.” A breathless laugh of disbelief left Jake, and both women shot him a glare of warning. “My fault? They’re the ones who attacked us— I was just tryna keep her—”

Neytiri jabbed her bow down at him again, “Your fault!”

He looked at the girl beside him as if to say ‘help me out here, for crying out loud!’ only for her to give a small shrug and pat his shoulder, soon rising to stroke his head in a mocking manner. “You heard her. Your fault, baby.”

“What she has said. You are like a baby. Don’t know how to act. And she is like caregiver. Small but strong while you act like a baby.” Neytiri was oblivious to the mirthful smile Y/N carried, for the reason being Neytiri didn’t know she used the word as an affectionate nickname for Jake, but let her continue to scowl down at him. He sighed in frustration, cautiously pushing away the weapon as he slowly emerged from the ground. “Easy, now, okay?”

Her face remained wary when he looked at her. “All I was tryna do was keep Y/N safe. But if you love your little forest friends, then why not let them just kill our asses, huh?” Neytiri’s expression eased at the mention of the human, peering down at her when she too, stared up at her with the same question wandering around her mind. The warrior recognized what it was to have a strong heart, what it is like to want to protect the one you care for. What it is you’d do for those very people, whether you risk your own life or not, recklessly or not. Which is why her stare remained fixated on Jake. “Why save you?”

His hands fell over his legs, nodding. “Why save me? Why save her?”

She blinked once, then twice. The answer was right there in her mind and heart, though her lips parted a few times as she tried regaining her speech in English. “You have a strong heart,” she softly admitted, “No fear …” she took a step forward, her common nose scrunch returning, “but stupid. Ignorant like a child.”

“And you..” she looked at the human, ears fluttering back, “Rainforest is dangerous for humans, but even when small you have a strong heart also. Seykxel txe’lan. Patient. Listens and respects…” she breathed in deeply in exasperation at recalling the many times Y/N nearly tripped in the forest, “but clumsy. Very clumsy. You must be more careful.”

Jake snickered, only for Neytiri to toss him a fiery glare. “Protect her better.”

He scoffed, hands thrown up in the air, “What is it with people telling me how to protect you?”

Now it was Y/N’s turn to laugh, and eyes that were already full of brightness seemed to shine even more, which Neytiri did not think was possible for a simple human. The sound rang through her enhanced senses, mouth very slightly ajar when Jake grinned. The impossible increased when his smile added to the brightness, and she thought herself to be a fool if she didn’t at least smile.

He looked at her, smile transforming into a jesting one, a more comfortable one, and with that, she seethed out a hiss, glared at him, then her, and made a sharp turn to leave them. Little did she know they were opted to cross and tangle paths with her within seconds, though that entanglement had already begun the moment she laid curious eyes on them.

The constancy of unsettlement made your skin rigidify under the cool air of the former RDA’s structure, unlike the outside world of Pandora had. You were eternally grateful for not getting rid of your old clothing, settling with casual wear followed by a deep blue sweater. A section of this place was formed into an infirmary, and you, or anyone, were to think that an eternity of hospital visits and spending most of your childhood and teen years appointed to different doctors would have been enough preparation for you in this moment. But even if light years away from those hospitals and believing your minor theory would only prove to be fallacious, because regardless of the many doctors, many nurses, many months researching, many in and outs between hospital room to hospital room, it couldn’t compare to the way your whole body racked with disquiet in this precise moment.

“Ma Y/N, you are shaking.” Neytiri’s hand expanded across your lower back, smiling ever so lovingly at you, “Mawey ( be calm ), tiyawn.” Jake now reached over, a large palm cupping your thigh and striked you with that reassuring, sweet grin that always managed to ease you. “Yeah. That heart of yours is too fast right now. Just relax, baby.”

“How the hell do you guys expect me to just stop shaking when it’s damn freezing in here! You’d think that my body has gotten used to the heat from Pandora, but no. How are you not freezing your tails off?”

The picture was abnormal; two tall and long blue bodies, both in their Na’vi wear, both crouched down on each side of little, practically hyperventilating you, a human being seated on a chair, trying to ease your jittering soul. It wasn’t rare to see Jake in here, he’s paid many visits here just for Norm or for a brief check-up for you, or to witness how the others are doing, how they’re holding up. But it was Neytiri that slightly worried you – you could feel the tension she’s trying to thaw away for you, how she held back hissing at the people walking past, nearly stepping on her tail and the only thing keeping her from glaring at them was the small apology they uttered and the touch received by Jake and you.

A deep chuckle rumbled from Jake’s chest, the sound fanning your temple as he placed a sweet kiss there. “I know it’s been awhile, but I’m sure it’s not that bad here. But let’s do some of those breathing exercises before Norm comes up in here, yeah?” Your curt nod confirmed his small smile, motioning to Neytiri whose palm began to rub soothing circles into your lower back.

“Breathe in for us.” You did as he said, eyes screwed shut while inhaling deeply through your nose. “That’s good, angel, now hold it in.” Neytiri’s fingers continued pressing down your back, both finding a way to guide you through your exhale. “Release, lovely girl, nice and easy.” she crooned into your ear, smiling pleased at the feel of your frame relaxing, at the sound of your heart slowing down. “Again, yes?”

Her nose nuzzled very tenderly behind the soft skin of your ear, and Jake’s had his forehead against your own, guiding you through your breaths as your sighs met his mouth. That was the conclusion of their strategy to ease you, an achievement they both knew their abilities could prosper. Though you still felt your anxiety struggling to find a balance with your peace, it was still enough to get them to become equal, caused by none other than these two who know you so deeply, evaluated the precise things you needed despite them being unclear to you.

“You remember that other doc that helped Grace find out how you can breathe in Pandora and your condition? Also helped with Grace’s pregnancy?” You allowed yourself to respond with a ‘yes’ as their warmth started seeping through your system. “ She has a field in REI. Norm and her, Dr. Mason. She was an old friend of Grace too, and since we trusted Grace, and we trusted Dr. Mason with Kiri’s birth, Neytiri and we trust she can help us too…is that okay?”

Neytiri parted from your skin, glancing at you with expectant eyes while Jake smiled. “I trust you two…so yeah. It’s okay.” Just as Jake removed himself from you, Norm, in his avatar form, and you recognized Dr. Mason from the times you visited Grace’s pregnant avatar body, entered the room with a small smile.

“Hello, Y/N. Neytiri. Jake.” You each gave a small nod to the brunette doctor. “How’re you all feeling right now? Especially you, Y/N?”

The question seemed gratuitous, you thought, because despite the other two trying to comfort you, you knew it unnerved Neytiri by the way she kept hold on you and Jake, well he has a fine smile at the moment, but you’re more than certain it may be costing him a lot to keep calm for your sake. And you; distress drenched your glistening face, and your leg bounced unsteadily so by the seams of it, this doctor is not an observing one.

A chuckle dragged out of Jake’s throat, hand clasped once more over your knee while the other reached for Neytiri’s shoulder. “We’re good, she’s good. Just nervous.”

Norm made his way towards Jake, clapping him on the back with a smile thrown your way and Dr. Mason pulled out a stark white rolling stool beneath the desk in front of her. “And that’s okay, being nervous is perfectly normal,” she looked directly towards you, settling down on the stool. “It’s to be expected, but I can guarantee you that the results from HSG you took earlier are perfectly fine; there’s no stoppage within your fallopian tubes. Everything’s functioning just the way it’s supposed to be.”

Your shoulders heaved in relief, and Neytiri took a chance in taking your hand in hers and giving a squeeze. You trust these two, you trusted Grace and the delivery of Kiri, but the valid confirmation contained more impact in this case. “So that means we can move forward or..?”

“There’s something we do have to add onto this,” Norm chirped through Jake’s open question, and you sensed the edge in his voice and the way the doctor’s posture straightened. Neytiri’s eyes flickered between them in question though Jake remained unbothered. “About?”

“Do you know how avatars were made?” You gave him a nod while your wife and husband motioned no, and Norm sighed at this, mostly at Jake, hand rising to pinch the bridge of his nose, muttering ‘Of course you don’t’ before dropping his hand. “Alright, time for the ‘geek’ stuff, as you call it, Jake. Neytiri, I’m sure you can keep up.” You all held back a smirk when Jake rolled his eyes but motioned him to continue.

“The Avatar Program used an embryo, an unborn offspring, that contained a mixture of Na’vi genes, and the human DNA from the one who was selected or volunteered, which I hope you remember was called ‘the driver’ of the body. Then the avatar is in those incubators, waiting to grow,” Norm explained, fingers rising to his brows. “Because the avatar has our exact DNA, they carry our similar features. Brows, eyes, our hands, shoulders, etcetera.”

“Okay, so what does this have to do with a damn child?” Jake’s brow furrowed and you gave him a look before looking back at Norm who proceeded. “Your body is originally an avatar, Jake. Which means you carry our normal human DNA reproduction. Or at least carried. You’ve adapted quite a lot over the months, and we’ve never…seen a human get pregnant by one of the Na’vi.”

“But Grace was pregnant–”

“Her avatar was pregnant,” Dr. Mason corrected. “While her human body was not. And up to this day we are still running tests to see how that was possible. We aren’t sure how Y/N’s body is going to react to this pregnancy. Now,” she put her hands together out in front of her and stared between Neytiri and Jake, then you. “I am going to be blunt, and straightforward. And I need the truth, despite the discomfort, you three.” You all glanced at each other, giving a nod.

“Have you participated in sexual activities?”

Your face flared and throat constricted before clearing it. “I, uh well we–” Jake wasn’t any better, eyes straying from the doctor with his mouth pressed into a line. Yet Neytiri, she gave a solid, unbothered nod, “Yes, we have.”

The doctor chuckled at how your wide eyes snapped towards her, and she only looked at you bewildered at your and Jake’s behavior before looking back at the human in front of her. “There is issue with this?”

She chuckled and shook her head. “No there isn’t. I just have a pair of questions that may help with this procedure. It’s alright.” Her brows rose in specification. “I hope there’s plenty of precautions, however. Size is different, size is important. But seeing that Y/N is unharmed, well I’m sure you have taken them, no?” You all nodded in agreement. She smiled before it fell, turning towards Jake. “Have you ever had a carnal outlet within Y/N more than once? And by ‘carnal outlet’, I mean sexual release.”

And so the embarrassing heat crawling up your neck continued flowing with her bluntness. His mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water, a distant look within his eyes as if recalling the events a few nights ago and you just have to resist bringing your hands to hide your face. His bright yellow eyes peered at you, then Neytiri whose expression spoke more than the truth. “Uh, yes. I have.”

She leaned back with a pensive look. “And from the looks of it, Y/N goes on without expecting a child. Now we could do an IVF to see if maybe that’d probably give some results. But even when creating an avatar, trying to bring together Na’vi DNA with a human’s was difficult enough, so there’s no telling how Y/N’s body would react to her egg and your…new sperm being definitely joined so…”

“You saying it won’t work?” Your chest churned a bit at Jake’s words, and Neytiri was becoming fretful from how long this whole conversation had become.

“We’re not sure. There also is something I have been debating on. Yes, joining human and Na’vi DNA came with difficulties, and it is a miracle that we had the opportunity to create avatars. But now here comes the more additional part Norm would like to assist me with.” All eyes were on Norm now whose face portrayed the utterance of slight nervousness. “It will, but the old fashion way. With Y/N…and another human.”

Jake’s eyes squinted. “Hold it. You mean she has to get knocked up by someone else?”

You resisted rolling your eyes and bit your lip. “You mean a sperm donor?” He whipped around and Neytiri’s forehead creased. “What does this mean?”

“It means some other guy’s sperm is gonna be donated to her and used for her to end up pregnant.”

“So the child will not be biologically ours?”

“Guess you can say that.” He grumbled, suddenly not very fond of the idea though you didn’t know what to feel.

“Biologically, no. Legal, yes.” Dr. Mason pointed out. “However,” Norm jumped in, sensing the shift in the atmosphere. “Not just by any guy’s sperm, if not yours, Jake.”

“I thought you just said my sperm ain’t gonna work since she hasn’t been knocked up with every round we’ve had. Then all three of us combined.” He bluntly spat out earning a smack to his bicep. “Jake, I swear—”

“Yes, we have said that. But we’re not talking about the body you have right now if not—”

“—My old body?”

Norm grinned. “exactly.”

“We gave his body a proper burial.” Neytiri frowned deeply, perplexed and perhaps a bit upset at this new information. “You will be breaking tradition if you go and take his body back after all this time.”

The room fell silent, and by the terribly familiar look Norm etched into his face, you already knew what had occurred before he could even begin to speak it into existence. “We have the body.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

The next thing you know, you’re all standing right before Jake’s human body that had been placed in a refrigeration morgue, still in a fine, well condition…alive. The sight of it…him with those once blue eyes hidden beneath completely shut eyelids, tugged on your heart, gulping thickly while you felt your mates’ tension radiating behind you. Neytiri’s gaze was punctured yet emotionless, but Jake, with the way his jaw set, the bareness of his back rippling with an unpleasant chill he didn’t think to feel.

“Why…why do you have this?” Jake rasped and looked at Norm who was leaning against the cold wall. “We wanted to see if your body was unaffected, still alive and well without you being in it… scientist curiosity.” He shrugged.

“And is it?” He nodded your way, peering down at the body. “Unconscious, obviously. But still functional…well except for the,” he motioned downwards, indicating the paralysis of his legs which Jake nodded at.

“And what does this have to do with Y/N and child?” Neytiri practically snarled, inhaling sharply and letting her hands fall over your shoulders, grasping a bit too tight. Dr. Mason, quiet the entire time, pushed her glasses back. “It means we’ll have to retrieve sperm from Jake’s old body to test this conclusion. We can try with your human body’s sperm with IVF as we spoke of the other day you were here, and if it does not meet the results, we can try with your current one now—”

“Hold on, my wife isn’t gonna become some sort of lab experiment.” Jake interrupted. “You should’ve told us all this before, including about this…thing right here. We don’t wanna put any strain on her body. You said so yourself, if putting Na'vi and human DNA was hard, now imagine her growing it in her. Her blood pressure and heart rate are going out of control with this whole process. I don’t want to risk her.”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes while Neytiri let out a long sigh with a pang in her chest, signs of frustration and hurt which didn’t get past Dr. Mason. You and Neytiri knew it wasn’t unusual for him to act like this, he’d done the same thing during your previous appointment, and every night he’d lay with you two in his arms, a distant look upon his face as he stared up at the night sky and both of you knew what was gearing in his head, the possible complications and risks that may recite when dealing with your condition. Yes, it has lessened, but your heart hasn’t changed whatsoever. His behavior was not to be disincentive, again, you knew this; Jake, along with Neytiri, both wanted to be informed thoroughly of each step and risk before a big decision was made.

And while the revelation of his human body, the very body and face you had first fallen in love with, had come as a big surprise to you all, his acts could be discouraging sometimes despite the fact that you appreciated his efforts. “Jake, my love, I’m sure she knows all this already.”

You thought Neytiri would’ve the very least agree with your words, and yet; “But perhaps Jake is right in this, ma Y/N. We do not know how your body will react.”

“Neytiri, Jake. Your wife is correct. Given her condition, and the results of her uterosalpingography, my suggestion would be to proceed with the IUI, and if, only if she would agree, to see what will happen with each of Jake’s sperm. this could include medication, to ensure that you are ovulating if you on the other hand would not be, a trig—”

He shook his head, shrugging off Norm's hand. “If I remember correctly, Norm, you said her cycle begins and lasts between 28 and 36 days.”

“ Jake—”

“Yes, but—”

“Nah.” He tore his eyes away from his wives. “I may not be a woman, and I might be slow on some things but I know how your body works, Y/N. We don’t wanna do things that are unnecessary and might harm her.”

“She will begin ovulating in 3 days from now, no? So the procedure…it happens a day or two after, right?” Neytiri questioned curiously, peering down at you as your hands rose to her forearms. But your gaze remained on Jake’s former body, and Dr. Mason’s focus was kept on you and your silence, analyzing your expression. “You both are correct.” It was then that she motioned Norm to cover the body back up when you looked away.

“So we won’t continue with this.”

More of a blunt statement than a question, and this simmered a low groan in your chest forgetting how Jake can be with his tone sometimes. “How does your wife feel about this, Mr. Sully?” Norm’s palm pressed over Jake’s shoulder when he was about to move forward while Neytiri looked down at you, studying every part of your face, the way the muscles of your shoulders constricted beneath her touch.

Those golden eyes tendered for a moment before raising her head to look at Jake, tugging on his arm hard causing him to rip his glare away from Norm. “It is up to Y/N to decide how she wants this to happen, ma Jake.” He turned your way, once hardened eyes returning to their usual softness when upon his girls. You noticed the way his mouth pressed together, how he strained himself from breathing, then asking, “What do you want, angel?”

“Can you let Dr. Mason and I talk alone for a moment?”

Neytiri’s hold on you gave a small pressure before releasing, dropping a kiss to your forehead. “Of course, seykxel txe’lan. Whatever you decide, we will support it.” A sigh relicted from Jake, giving a quick glance to Norm then Dr. Mason before nodding. “We’ll be out here.” You smiled nervously at the way Neytiri eyed the doctor, her voice silent but her eyes speaking louder than audible words.

Their presence, and mainly his hesitation, to let you and the doctor enter the room was something permeable, breathed in by you both. When she closed the door, away from the tensing muddle out there, you exhaled while Dr. Mason quietly returned to her stool.

“I’m uh….sorry about him. And her.” You let out a wary laugh and she simply chuckled and settled with a soft smile. “There is nothing to apologize for, Y/N. I found myself expecting it considering previous encounters,” she waved off your apology, both chuckling before she perched herself forward. “But this isn’t about them right now. This is about you, your body. And as Neytiri said, your decision.”

You took in a slow, deep breath and processed her words, the doctor before you patiently waiting for you to respond. You do so by nodding your head, tightly clasping your hands together over your lap.

Her eyes squinted and cleared her throat. “The way Jake said it was a bit…too harsh. But again, Neytiri was right on point with the ovulation cycle. You are familiar with the function of IUI?”

“I’m familiar with the way Norm explained it all nervously while Jake and Neytiri watched him, yeah.” She chuckled and you couldn’t help smiling, comfortability being a main key in this procedure, and her presence was one connected to it as all the other times you’ve had encounters with her. “She was correct about your ovulating cycle?”

“Yes, I will begin ovulating in about 3 days.”

“Alright! Now, the procedure. You are familiar with it?” Her head tilt followed her question, lenses very slightly sliding down her nose before she adjusted them. Your reflection bounced off them, giving you a glimpse of the curiosity brimming your eyes, brows twisted in concentration. “I am, actually. But a brief review never harmed anyone, did it?”

She grinned amused at your words, grabbing a screen set over her desk and turned it on. “Of course not.”

“On the day of your ovulation, you'll return to me. The chosen sperm sample — chosen as in between Jake’s two forms — will be prepared and cleaned for the procedure. You might feel some mild discomfort from the speculum, but it shouldn't be painful.”

You nodded in agreement with every word, attentively absorbing each sentence. While Norm had already informed you about much of this, hearing it directly from the person conducting the procedure provided an additional sense of reassurance. But the mention of your mates, the choosing of Jake sort of triggered you.

She of course caught on to it, and paused. “The reason why we give you the option of Jake’s both forms is because we are not 100 percent certain if he now can accomplish this. The question being asked of him having an outlet had a major part in this, but since he confirmed he has and you haven’t sounded up pregnant…well we may have to try with his human form.”

“A-and that will for sure work?”

She turned off her screen and placed it down quietly with a sigh. “His human form, yes, I am certain there will be results, perhaps not right away but that’s normal. We can as well try with his Na’vi sperm as well, if you are up for it, though we may have to do IVF instead for that process.”

She attentively explained the difference to the process of IVF, and you kept up in order to understand what she meant.

“But there is something you may like to know, and I didn’t say to the other two because I need to hear from you first;” She held a tight smile, and you anxiously yearned for the doctor to finally articulate whatever it is she had to. “Neytiri and Jake, they’re both mated before Eywa, correct?”

You gave a nod and her gaze punctured on you a bit longer. “Well, I conclude that because they are a mated Na’vi pair, both their zygote may, perhaps, be able to combine with your own egg, given that the fetus may have not only yours and Jake’s genes, but biologically Neytiri’s as well.”

The idea thrilled and terrified you, but mainly thrilled especially clearly for the reason all three of you shared a part in this, by the prospect of welcoming not only a new life, but the thought of nurturing a child who would embody the unique blend of their shared genetics.

“But, there’s no exact response with how this will react with Neytiri in the circle. My theorized research indicates that it leans more on the positive side, though there still are flaws within this. So, to put it shortly; would you like to do IUI with Jake’s former body? If it doesn’t work, we can try again. We can do three to four rounds before and only if you decide to move on with IVF and inform Jake and Neytiri about this.”

You chewed on your lip contemplating our decision making and slight worries. You did want to take whatever chance you could if it meant birthing your own child, experiencing motherhood, fulfilling the dream of giving your mates an additional symbolism of your love. With that, you gave a firm nod. “I’ll do it. And the IVF.”

She gave you a smile, one that tried to bring some sort of tension release from your posture. “Alright then. Do you have any more questions for me?”

You inhaled, debating the single query that rattled within your brain at the moment, “is choosing this making me self absorbed?

“Having a baby makes one self absorbed?”

Your locks swayed from your head shake no. “Of course not but…given my heart, the big possibilities that might not be good, the stress. Me being human and in Pandora. How will the baby turn out…human or one of the Na’vi?”

“What Neytiri calls you..seykxel txe’lan. It means strong heart, correct?”

“Yes..”

“Do you believe that you have a strong heart?”

“I do.”

She proceeded. "Life holds immense value. Opting to utilize the precious gift of life bestowed upon you to bring forth another being is a weighty decision, especially considering your profound awareness of your given circumstances, but again; your physical capabilities are powerful. Your heart is strong, and it’s choosing to take this step because of that strength. You know this because it’s yours. While there may be uncertainty about whether this response fully addresses your inquiry, it summarizes the center of the situation as best as possible." Her mouth curled. “And the last one…let’s leave it up to God, or Eywa, as the Na’vi say.”

A watery laugh fell from your lips as you accepted her choice of words and nodded. You know you can handle this greatly. For your heart is strong, and it is under your knowing.

Dancing. A profound significance within the Na’vi, though Y/N and Jake witness it through the Omaticaya’s culture. It served as a vibrant and intricate expression of their traditions and communal bonds. It was strongly included after the hunt Jake and Neytiri had succeeded in, a Hunt Festival. As both their feet were led into the bustling of their Hometree by the Olo’eyktan’s daughter, they couldn’t help the amazement enhancing their expressions from a spirited atmosphere promised of not just mere entertainment but rather a living testimony of the rich tapestry of their heritage.

Her eyes were blown out, mouth elevated in a smile while Jake held a wide grin, both of you being maneuvered through the tugs Neytiri gave your arms, her share of an anticipating smile brightening the night. “Come, faster!”

“We’d be moving faster if this one here would speed up,” Jake smirked down at Y/N, a glower meeting his expression. “Not my fault I’m tinier,” she grumbled, a screech of surprise following along as he deftly carried her, arms thrown across his too broad shoulders. “If you drop me—“

“Oh, how the tables have turned in our size, angel.” The usual steady octave of his voice morphed into a tuneful hum, and Neytiri’s smile grew impossibly larger at the sight of them before grabbing Jake.

“Hurry.”

Tall and graceful figures shimmered of many colors to the rhythm of enticing music permeating the air. Many of the Na’vi’s blue frames were accentuated with extensively used bundles of feathers and long multicolored cords tied around their long arms and legs. And that included Neytiri, whose once braided hair had been released to free, dark tendrils cascading across her back, swaying with every quick step she took towards the one they called Tsu’tey, the scientist Norm, and Grace Augustine, and Jake settled down between his two friends with Y/N still in his arms, not bothering to set her down.

Eytukan, father of Neytiri, head of the clan and Olo’eyktan, and Mo’at, mother of Neytiri and the clan’s spiritual leader, discerned her daughter, then Jake, and after days of slight hesitation around the human’s presence, Eytukan found ease with her the moment he saw his mate confirmed she was not a harm, and was chosen alongside Jake. The Na’vi too had been skeptical, some still remained that way when seeing how Eywa had given a sign to not kill not just the avatar, but the human.

Though the acceptance from their Tsahik and Olo’eyktan gave them a sliver of peace, some disregarding their presence, others bowing their heads, some even greeting the pair. But right now, everyone’s concentration was bored into their dancing, into a spiritual connection that harmonized them with nature, embodying a profound respect for the flora and fauna that surround all that is living around them. And there was Neytiri, wavering fastidiously between all bodies unknown to Y/N and Jake, and out of all people she decided to keep her glowing eyes fixated on them both, teeth slightly bared in a smile.

Jake took part in conversing with Tsu’tey and other warriors, reciting the events that had taken place during the hunt, those around him loudly favoring him and he sported a large grin when Tsu’tey clapped him in the back before his attention returned to Neytiri, absorbing her fluent movements and beautiful presence, then the girl seated on his lap.

“You’re pretty wearing that, y’know?” Y/N shuddered beneath his touch on her neck, looking over only to meet vehement eyes and a small smirk, his freckles profounding his features beautifully. She beamed up at him, knowing what he meant by his words; she wore clothing the Na’vi had gifted her with, and her hair had been brought back, a small amount of narrow braids being styled by none other than Neytiri, twinkling yet light-colored spherules and cords woven through when the braid had been halfway finished, and a few strands had found their place in swaying across your temples and brows.

An angel she is, was what Jake’s heart thumped the more he looked at her, and it seemed he wasn’t the only one who thought so. A breathless and vibrant Neytiri had stepped out of the crowd and crouched in front of her, her legs transposing her much closer to them. “Jake is right;” The tips of her long fingers skimmed across a braid sitting comely over Y/N’s bare collarbone, right near a handcrafted necklace similar to Jake’s. “Sevin. Pretty. Very pretty tonight.” The human’s poor wayward heart prospered a fervor warmth at the tender curve Neytiri’s lips painted for her, at the words uttered for and because of her. She tried pushing back air from her lungs by clearing her throat, unaware of Jake’s gaze inspecting both of them scrupulously. “T-thank you…it’s because of you though. Irayo, Neytiri. (thank you)”

Her ears twitched at the sound of her name perfectly pronounced by Y/N’s lips. “Kea tìkin. (You’re welcome.)” The very lips she couldn’t help let her gaze fall upon for a brief moment before looking between her and Jake. A grin transformed her face, “You must dance.”

Her hand reached for his arm while the other went to Y/N’s knee, and his head whirled to her who recognized the strike of panic in him. “N-nah, I’m good. Not much of a dancer. Besides, Y/N is too small for that.” In true recognition, she knew how he hadn’t had any contact with dancing due to his paralysis back on Earth, especially considering he never had the apparent time when he joined the Marine. So, instead of prying him to stay and playfully scolding him for remarking her size, she slid off his lap and patted his cheek. “Go.”

“It is the way.” Neytiri insisted, giving Y/N’s knee a squeeze before grabbing his arm once more.

He peered between them, eyes squinted and searching Y/N’s round ones with his mouth pursed. “You sure?” Tsu’tey, the one betrothed to Neytiri, had an almost like scowl across his face but stayed quiet, watching how Neytiri beamed when he gave in at Y/N’s eager nod, pushing him into Neytiri’s hold. “Yes, now stop being a baby and dance!”

She giggled when Jake dropped a kiss to her head, and before him being dragged away he pulled along Grace who exclaimed in surprise, Norm laughing out loud before joining the three.

As the tempo of the music started to escalate, Neytiri positioned Jake in front of her, motioning for him to follow her movements along with everyone else’s around them; her palms extended out in front of her, and Jake’s brushed against hers before taking a small step forward and mirrored the way her hands shimmered and arms slowly glided above her head. Sparks of amber materialized, both their irises flickered when the pads of their fingers strode across one another’s, those sparks simmering with each of their movements and feathered touches. His chest racketed in an awful familiarity when with Y/N, throat tightening the more his eyes bore within hers. He resisted the urge to encase his palms around her forearms and wrap them around himself, firmly reminding himself of those surrounding them, of his angel watching them. And yet when he spared a glance her way, he saw her with the warmest of smiles, skin gaining its precious glow and eyes tender yet wondrous while staring at them both.

He had comprehended the way Y/N had grown incredibly close to Neytiri, and Neytiri never once denied or ignored her existence as a human. Sure, like any other of the Na’vi, the female warrior detained slight skepticism, but that was at the beginning. He discerned the way Neytiri treated Y/N with the equal amount of protection and precision as him; how her body would stay close to Y/N’s when walking through the forest, or how with her being human she was aware to her dietary being distinctly different to the Na’vi, so she would ride Seze and fly where Grace, Jake, and Norm’s human bodies resided in and her former mentor would help her gather nutritions for Y/N, returning to Pandora’s forests and firmly imply for the human to eat. Or how her thin patience with him is spared with Y/N’s quickness in picking up on their culture, traditions, and language. And if he wasn’t indicating something that was clearly noticeable, she approached not just Y/N but him with small gestures of affection.

From the lightest of touches to the specters of gazes and curls of gorgeous smiles or deep scowls and scolding remarks (mainly towards him but he found it entertaining) ; he, along with Y/N, sensed how grand Neytiri’s presence captivated them. He felt accepted with his Y/N, understood, acknowledged with his Y/N. He was saved because of her pure existence. But for the past months, Neytiri had made her scorching mark within their relationship, one that was the complete opposite of incapacitating. Sanctuary resided with both Y/N and her, safety, protection, strength, affirmation with himself, with his existence in this new world, completely disintegrating the main reason as to why he agreed to be a part of the Na’vi, and instead flourished a new desire within himself.

Those radiant specks ignited violently when the length of their fingers collided within the other’s, each speck accumulating between their clasped palms. Overwhelmed was her expression, eyes fluttering with the realization of what had occurred before gently pushing him away for the next part of the dance. He chuckled, giving one more look towards Y/N before devoting his complete focus to this dance, more so Neytiri.

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

Giggles and laughter wafted through the expansive canvas of Pandora's azure sky, where the rhythmic beats of tree drums faded into the background, becoming the least of their concerns. They ambled through the forest, their joyous expressions painting the scene with the happiest of faces.

"You could've joined us, Y/N. We would have found a way." Neytiri's graceful strides carried her among the radiant flora, huffing a giggle as Y/N grumbled when a sizable leaf brushed across her face, only for Jake to effortlessly pluck it away and swipe it aside.

"No worries, Tiri." A sweet smile graced her lips as she addressed the statuesque woman. "It might have been a bit awkward for you to kneel down in front of me or something."

A chuckle emanated from Jake as his hand descended gently over her head. "would've teamed you up with a youngster. Imagine how cute that’s be." Her captivating eyes sharply rolled in his direction. In times past, he might have found it not only adorable but also slightly intimidating. Yet now, he found himself in the realm of charm, fingers tenderly stroking beneath her chin, a quick move near Neytiri before Y/N could manage to push him away from the apartment of delightful moments.

Her cunning was evident, for as his elongated strides carried him farther from her, his tail swayed freely, exposed and vulnerable. Seizing the opportunity, she deftly entwined her fingers around its end, exerting a gentle tug. A hiss escaped his lips, a feeble attempt to feign annoyance, yet it dissolved swiftly as the infectious sound of their shared laughter enveloped them. The girls' giggles cascaded into uncontrollable fits of mirth, captivating him to the point where he couldn't resist joining in with a hearty chuckle.

He hunched down, pressing his palms firmly against his thighs, his gaze piercing as it locked onto her. "Come here," he commanded, his voice laced with anything but authority. A high-pitched squeal reverberated in his ears, her nimble feet propelling her towards the vibrant glow of neon lights. The sound of their resounding footfalls echoed in pursuit of her every step.

Pandora's breath danced through her hair, unfettered and carefree. The liberating sensation enveloped her as she sprinted, releasing laughter that lingered in the air with breathless grace. Gradually, her pace decelerated, the absence of their footsteps prompting a deliberate and attentive pause. Amid the hushed surroundings, she found herself captivated by the radiance of a luminous plant, its allure seizing her focus. Delicately, her fingers traced the intricate leaves, a smile softly adorning her lips.

A yelp left her throat as long, firm arms curl around your waist and raw warmth pressed into her from behind. “Gotcha,” Jake murmured into her neck, lips brushing her thrumming pulse point. For Eywa’s sake. “Got scared? Serves ya right for grabbing on my tail.”

Just as she’s willing her heart rate to slow down and closed her eyes for not even a second, Neytiri’s face appeared right in front of Y/N earning another jolt from her. “What is wrong with you!”

Neytiri’s laughter resonated with a joyous, airy cadence. A soft breeze swerved into her ears, finding its destination within Y/N’s heart and gifted it with the strong, steady beat it grandly needed in this moment.

“Forgive me, Y/N.” The flash of stark rows gleamed in a great smile. “Jake thought it would be fun. Are you alright?

She let out a breathy huff and allowed herself to melt in Jake’s embrace, reaching for Neytiri’s hands who without hesitation granted them to her. It was a common thing to witness now, the petite physical interactions between the two girls. Jake didn’t mind however, he enjoyed seeing them get along.

“I’m fine…just catching my breath.” She divulged, inhaling deeply only for her to catch Neytiri’s and Jake’s absorbing scents, before her elbow lightly nudged his torso. “Scared me. Rude ass.”

Jake’s arms tightened ever so slightly, thumbs stroking the unclad juts of her hip bones in something similar to an apology. “M’bad, angel.” He hummed, baring his teeth in a grin. “But it would’ve been funny to see you dance with a kid your exact size.”

“Jake.”

“It’s the truth! Imagine slow dancing with one, that’s be so adorable—”

She groaned, “Jake can you not!”

She released Neytiri to push his heavy arms away before reaching for one of his hands, then Neytiri’s and tugged her forward. “C’mon Tiri!” The young hunter, however, had a pensive expression, their words from earlier peeking a wonder in her.

“There is dancing in sky people’s home?”

Y/N’s current movements came to a halt, her head whirling towards the Na’vi woman. Jake let out a laugh edged with ridicule, as if her words were the punchline of a joke towards humankind until he saw her face. “Oh shit, you’re serious?”

“Oh shit, yes I am serious.” Mocking was her tone, and Y/N chuckled at her use of ‘shit’. “You didn’t cover this in the school Grace taught in?” he debriefed, head tilting as he stood up fully.

She nodded, “She did tell us this. But not specifics, another topic she moved to and we never knew if sky people danced different than us.” Her tresses fell behind her shoulders as she too stood to her full height, leaving Y/N to meet the center of her abdomen. The human took an abrupt step back, cheeks glowing with a subtle flush at how her tinier hand was still engulfed by Neytiri’s.

“They do dance, but not all have the same dance styles.”

“Dance styles?”

“Y-yeah. Like traditional dances, similar to your people’s, or break dancing, disco dancing, salsa, ballet, and a lot more.” Y/N smiled up at Neytiri as she proceeded her words. “What about the one Jake spoke of? Slow dancing?”

Her smile widened, glancing over at Jake who took in a breath before explaining. “It’s a dance—”

“Obviously, Sherlock.”

“Y/N, angel don’t interrupt me.”

“What is Sherlock?”

“Neytiri, honey, I’ll explain later—”

“Anyways! Slow dancing is a type of style where there’s two people, right? They get very close, sorta like a hug, I guess you can say. And you just,” his body swayed side to side in a silly motion that made Y/N hold back a giggle while Neytiri’s lips pursed. “Sway.”

“And, anyone can participate in this?” Y/N nodded, “but it’s seen as an intimate dance. Like, for couples.” The warrior stayed quiet, trying to gather her thoughts together to express them. “Have…you and Jake acted in slow dancing when both on earth?”

Jake snorted, his interlocked hand with Y/N’s swinging. “Nah, we couldn’t.” Neytiri didn’t understand fully, and they didn’t expect her to, and for the time being, they didn’t say anything just yet. She nodded in acknowledgement, respecting their silence and thought for a moment. “Would you like to?”

“Yeah…but like he said; I’m too short for it.”

“Size does not matter in intimacy.” The human blinked in surprise, staring up at Neytiri. “I suppose you’re right…but we need the right tune for it.”

“And tune as in song.” Jake interjected. “And we don’t happen to carry some portable speaker, so…”

“Song is all around us, Jake.” Neytiri was right. The lush and vibrant landscape was alive with a wide range of animal noises, creating an immersive auditory experience. The woods resounded with the chittering and chirping of hexapedal creatures like the woodsprites and viperwolves. Their interactions generated a lively background noise, enhancing the sense of a thriving ecosystem. The ground-dwelling direhorses, hammerhead titanotheres, and other unique beings added their own distinct vocalizations to the rich tapestry of Pandora's wildlife.

He cleared his throat and Y/N’s smile widened. “Do you want to learn, Tiri?”

Her determined nod made her laugh, and turned to Jake. “Mr. Good Height, you’re dancing with her.”

His brows jumped up. “Don’t wanna sound like an asshole, but I already danced with her.”

“You can do it again, can’t ya?”

“Why don’t you?”

Y/N hummed in false thought, leaning right in front of Neytiri and motioned her arms around her lower waist while Neytiri could only stare at what she was doing. “This a good way to slow dance?”

“She can get on her knees for you.” She caught the glint of mischief in his eyes, and she rolled her eyes in hopes to cover up the heat rushing to her cheeks. “No, that’d be awkward — Jake, come on.”

He looked over at Neytiri, debating, seeking if she wanted the option of dancing with him. He in reality did want to, but he wanted Y/N to have part in this as well, so she could feel that strong affinity he too felt. “Alright, but you have a part in this as well.”

She seemed unconvinced, pulling his arm in order for him to get closer to Neytiri. “Yeah, yeah I will take part by telling you how to. Jake, put a hand right…" She hovered his palm right over the arch of her back, his arm practically enveloping her, and she was fully aware of the way Neytiri’s breath sharpened and looked up at her. “You okay?”

She nodded, “What must I do?”

“Put one hand on his shoulder.”

The muscles constricted beneath her gentle touch, Jake clearing his throat and rose his other hand. “Gimme yours, now.” Both their hands now clasped together, and Y/N’s smiled softly at the way her four fingers glided through his human-like ones. Jake nodded as in remembrance of what occurred next and took lead. “Now, we just slowly move…”

Her eyes flickered to his for a brief moment, a rare shyness pervading her features and he couldn’t help but chuckle. “Relax…just follow my lead, alright?” Their chests brushed against one another at the delicate sway he indicated, bare feet motions small yet shockingly skillful steps, and Neytiri couldn’t help but stumble at the turn he gave her. He laughed, shaking his head when she glared his way and pulled away. “Sorry, it’s normal though. C’mon, let’s try again.”

“It will happen again?”

“It could, Tiri.” Y/N said, both glancing her way only to see her sitting on the glowing ground with an anticipating grin stretching her mouth. “But that’s okay! Just keep trying, okay?” She huffed out an ‘okay, yes’, resuming her position near the male who grinned at her. “Let’s repeat that motion again, okay? Just look at my feet if you want…lemme guide you through it.”

Lighthearted he felt from her curious eyes, at her small ‘like this?’, at the way she entrusted her body in his closeness, the way her nose would crunch up in small frustration before he would assure her it’s okay, Y/N giving her an encouraging smile when she looked aside. A few minutes had passed, and they had already made a full circle around the spot they’d been in, and she was wondrously catching onto the dance, his hands guiding her movements. Neytiri, initially skeptical, found joy in the dance. It was different from what she’d grown up with, much more simple, much more simplicity of contact that beheld pureness yet an intense amount of sensations…perhaps that is why she enjoyed it.

“There ya go, good job…” Excited, round globes made from shades of gold and green engulfed him, her ears fluttering at the small praise she had received. A few more languid beats went by, and subconsciously their faces inclined closer, his chin slightly dipped down causing his nose to feather down hers. Upon this act, those ember cinders convoked once more, just like the earlier dance. He embraced them, however, and she didn’t push away either.

It was like one of those old romantic films witnessed back on Earth, Y/N thought, her hand clasped against her cheek as her elbow hoisted over her thigh. But more profound and distinct, and maybe it was for the fact that they were in a whole other, much more preternatural world, its gorgeous fluorescent lights somehow intensifying their tall enchanting figures, the way their tails surged in synchronization with their now deft feet that moved across the glowing ground.

The once thought to be weak heart of hers encapsulated in her chest swelled when their movements came to a halt, and two pairs of golden irises turned to her, and a smiling Neytiri pulled away from him to grab the girl from her current sitting spot. “He said you have part in this too… come.”

Three beings, one apart of the Na’vi by birth, one once a Sky Warrior and now a part of the Omaticaya Na’vi, and one human prophesied by Eywa to live and walk among them as if one of Na’vi, could be seen dancing in Pandora’s forest, nocturnal creatures assisting in the moment with their light as Jake gently twirled the human and Neytiri with each of his hands. And what could be heard were the aerance laughters and giggles from the three, a bond just as much intimate and reflective as forming tsaheylu tethering the three’s hearts together in this precise moment.

Enduring the act of waiting wasn't a preference, but you were well acquainted with it. Your moral patience, unwillingly cultivated, now functioned as a whole waged implement. A day after your appointment with Dr. Mason was reduced to 3 weeks, requiring you to wait during that time before taking the next step for an HCG test or a pregnancy-like test that had been created.

Yet with that being said, the enduring act of waiting wasn’t one for you at times. Neytiri, however, as much as she wished for results if you’d been blessed with a child, stayed firm to her patience, trying to trust the process of sprouting life within your womb — though you did catch on to how odd and perhaps even terrifying it seemed to her, the numerous steps to be taken in this, how it couldn’t compare to the simplicity of Na’vi birth ( though in your perspective of a human, it did seem curiously strange to the way they gave birth as well —). And even the Tsahik had been involved with the hopes of a child, attentive to any signs the Great Mother may give. You did notice the amount of times Neytiri went to go see her mother, and when she would return she was reticent about it, a bit too curt followed by a minor smile. Perhaps you were thinking things too thoroughly, but she became slightly distant.

Jake was…unpredictable to determine his exact emotions, to say the least. One would think he’d be involved in the constancy of reassurance, but of course, actuality is a must in these cases. Erratic he was, deriving within his acts as Clan Leader a bit more often than he would usually have to do. Monitoring for the two little ones was never a complaint for you, always happily complying because you adore them endlessly, yet constantly doing so while trying to monitor your own health and Neytiri and Jake attending their own duties spawned something distinct from their habitual affectations.

Jake arrived home much later at night, his appetite strange, and he kept more quiet than he’d ever been with you on specific things. His act with his two children wasn’t any different, while he would hold and smile at them, his eyes carried a distant look. Now every time you held and played with them, that neutral demeanor would be there. One you haven’t seen since the conflict between the RDA and the Na’vi. You or Neytiri didn’t pry on it, but you knew Neytiri knew as to why he was behaving like this. When nightfall came, however, they never neglected in holding you close, almost too pleading, providing you with their sole warmth. You more than understood that they had their duties as Olo’eyktan and wife of Olo’eyktan to fulfill, how it may take partial time from your family. But now was a time you needed them more than ever, and confronting the two was bound to come with difficulties, because even Neytiri would be out the second sunlight peeked out in the sky.

So, when Neytiri had informed you she was going to meet her mother for something she didn’t specify any details about and the once bright day had come down to nightfall, you decided to notify Mo’at only for her to tell you she knew nothing of meeting with her daughter, and Jake had been on the calendar to train a few young warriors, your mother-in-law more than willingly stayed with her grandchildren for you to visit a specific spot in the forest, one you were familiar with from the many times you and your mates spend many loving moments there early on in your relationship. And of course, there you found the two glowing forms; Neytiri with her nose flaring as her mouth twisted into a frown, and Jake’s eyes came with tiredness and sadness all at once, ears flattening at the words coming out of your wife’s mouth.

“She has every right to know! I do not like this — the way you act, the way you keep secrets. You ask me to keep from her and she suffers more. I cannot— I have to say something!”

“Look, I know, believe me I know but how do you think she’s gonna take this? She’s not gonna take it well! We’re doing her a favor. Her heart—”

“Neytiri. Jake.”

They both spun your direction way before you could even utter their name, for they heard you coming a mile away, and their twisted features somewhat eased at the sight of you and Jake plastered a smile while Neytiri’s lips tightened together into a thin line.

“Hey, angel.” In three long strides Jake reached you, kneeling down and looped his long arms around you, the tip of his pink, cat-like nose nudging your cheek, and you couldn’t deny his affection. Your arms instantly wrapped around his shoulders as he gave you a swift but soft kiss, and you couldn’t help but follow his lips, wanting a much longer kiss. But you internally groaned when he pulled back, his brows furrowed as he looked at you. “Watcha doing out here all alone? It’s not safe, Y/N—”

“Do you two have any idea where you should be right now?”

His frown dropped and his chest bowed with a deep breath. “I know we’re supposed to be at home right now but—”

“And yet you two are not—” he rose to his full height, back turned your way and one of his hands came to tangle into his locs. “Why aren’t you at home?”

Jake could only look at anything but you, but Neytiri did the opposite, her gaze punctured over your distressed face, ears twitching at the sound of your heartbeat, at the way you tried keeping a steady rhythm and balance in your voice. “You’re not going to say anything, aren’t you?”

Her lips parted, eyes saddening before alarming at the frantic increase of your heart. “Ma Jake — ma stxe’lan, mawey-”

Jake had already turned to you, rushing to your side and splayed a large palm over the small of your back. “Baby, c’mon breathe for us.”

“Y—you two knew—” Neytiri was on your other side, fingers soothing over your chest for she knew how an ache emerged there when you tried to speak with a frantic heart. “Lovely girl, you must breathe.” But your head shakes were equivalent to the speed your heart did, a muskiness of tears warping your vision. “You knew. You knew, you knew! That’s why you’re not here—”

“Angel, please. Just please, pause and breathe.” You gave in to the soothing circles their fingers did over your skin, inhaling and exhaling as best as you could despite the jabbing pain in the back of your throat. But right when you nearly let yourself fall into their arms, you pushed from their touch, and Neytiri’s eyes never left yours while Jake inspected if you were hurt.

“So I’m not…I'm not pregnant.” Jake’s head dipped down, and it surprised you when he stayed silent and Neytiri was the one to respond, her mouth pushed down imitating the frown that could’ve drawn together her said-brows, allowing it to morph that beautiful face of hers. “Kehe, tiyawn. ( no love ) You are not.”

It didn’t bring you any ounce of comfort, however, when it was her simple statement to corroborate your doubts. “And how long have you both known, huh?” you demanded, inhaling deeply.

“Your scent is….it resumed the same five days ago.”

“So, for five days, you both — not one but the TWO of you decided to keep this from me instead of being honest? Do we take part in lying now in this….whatever this is now?” Jake’s head snapped up at your last question, attempting to reach for you yet you declined, pushing his hands away while taking another step back. Both their tails swiveled in a distress-like matter as they stood to their full height, his more agitated and flinching from your shove while hers tried to keep steady, trying to contain herself from reaching for you. Hurt scrunched Jake’s face and his ears demolished at the sides of his head, and you deciphered their expressions in a second; never once had you denied their touch, and not having the privilege to touch you in this exact moment stirred them unwell.

“Angel, please lemme explain–”

“You need to stop telling her to keep things from me,” you snapped at him, then turned to her, “And since when do you listen to this idiot? My goodness, Neytiri!” you pause, trying to gather your thoughts, trying to compose yourself yet there’s a break in the octave of your hoarse voice when you whisper, “Do you guys even care about this? Is this some joke to you?”

Jake practically threw himself down on his knees before you, and in spite of your objections, both palms cupping your cheeks so very softly but desperately, and due to their size his fingers nearly curl around the sides of your head, soon falling over your shoulders. “N-no! We care about your wellbeing, it’s not some joke.”

“T-then why…why didn’t you say anything?” Neytiri, graceful even when in distress, crouched down, her legs ingeniously treading towards you, settling behind you and she slowly reached for you. A strangled breath left her throat and you realized she was neglecting her own stream of tears as yours were being swatted away by her fingertip the second they fell to your cheekbones. “We…we, your heart–”

“I didn’t want us hurting you like this, angel. Her as much as I didn’t want to cause you this pain.” Jake admitted, amber eyes focused on you when you looked up at him. “But, of course we…I did this anyway, and here you two are crying. I asked this of her, and I’m sorry. To both of you.” One of his hands reached to curl around the side of Neytiri’s trembling jaw. “I’m sorry.”

“You should’ve said something sooner.”

“Oeru txoa livu. (please forgive me)” Neytiri crooned softly, “My lovely girl, forgive me, forgive us for being skxawngs.” Her gentle kisses met your forehead, temple, your fluttering eyelids, then each of your cheeks, and lastly your lips. You allowed it, for the reason being that her lips – and his soft, hesitant touches – could perhaps be one of the few things to keep you anchored right now.

Of course, this result had been one not unexpected, nor was it unusual, for Dr. Mason had previously discussed the success rate of your procedure, providing you with statistics that were not the most promising. Despite this, you held onto a sliver of hope, reaching out for even a small connection between the two of you, in hopes to twine paths together. But faith was a funny and most curious companion when it came to you, remaining capricious and challenging, frequently draining and depleting you until you were left with little energy to fight back.

Jake looked at you with much rounder eyes, the misery within them finally seeping through your heart and sighed before reaching for him, and planted a very light kiss over his mouth in terms to ease him up. Though the emotion remained on his face, his ears stopped finicking and slightly twitched the very same time his mouth did so.

“Oel tsun fìtsenge ( I am going home. )” Neytiri’s hand captured your own negligently and stood up. You looked up at her honey-like orbs, and while tears still resided in both your eyes, you recognized what could be seen as relief in hers. Relief that the truth came to the surface despite the cost of sadness. “I will come with you, ma Y/N.” You smiled a bit and nodded, about to take a turn in leaving until Jake’s own hand tightly grasped yours and Neytiri’s. It was as if Jake’s entire being was intricately woven into the quivering grasp of your hands. As you gazed into his profound eyes, you could sense his fear growing. He was afraid that if he let you go without following you, he may never lay eyes on you again. It was an irrational fear, one that he surely knew deep down, but his mind was clouded by emotions. The moment he saw you both in tears, his rationale vanished. The tears that continued to stream down your face were a result of his deceit, and he could not bear to see you in such pain.

He gave both your hands a tight squeeze and a wobbly smile, “I’ll come home too.”

Once greeting and bidding the babies a good night’s sleep and Mo’at – giving her daughter a look that indicated a proper talk – took her leaving, once resided in the comfortable size of the hammock and enwrapped in their long limbs, you forfeited your body to them, and resentment fled from you. To be sincere, most of the whole time, resentment was not all directed towards your wife and husband ( though yes they do manage to frustrate the living hell out of you sometimes ), but most of it was pointedly aimed at yourself; your body, but most of it pointedly aimed at your so called strong heart.

Neytiri’s arms were fully encased around you, her lips sweetly falling over your temple over and over again as she rocked you in hopes to provide you with nothing but comfort, wanting only to bring what you always brought to them; peace.

Jake said nothing as his arm splayed over yours and Neytiri’s waist. His silence brought you to tilt your head up at him only to see he’d already been staring down at you. Reading Jake’s expressions was one you did with pride, and yet tonight you couldn’t fully unravel what was going on in that head of his. But a warmth washed his features for a moment before kissing your forehead, and it was then that you allowed your words to exhale up your throat; “I want to try again.”

Neytiri smiled softly down at you and gave you a firm nod, while Jake simply hummed and stared up at the night sky as he tucked your head beneath his chin and pulled Neytiri closer, both unaware of the single tear gliding down his cheek. “Like Neytiri said; your desires are our desires, angel.”

Months in Pandora carried on an atmosphere filled with prosperity and peace after the First Pandoran War, the war of Pandora, the RDA-Na’vi conflict, or the Time of Great Sorrow, as the Na’vi titled it as. And while mourning those whose lives had been lost to the Sky People came with a heavy process, now was a time to thrive, to live, to celebrate the new life given to the Na’vi. 

The wondrous news of a seed of life planted within Neytiri’s womb had been taken as a gift from Eywa, any child was of course, yet this was the first birth indicated after the mournful events, and this was a token for the dedication the People stayed firmed to for Eywa’s child, Pandora.

“What does a fortress mean to you, Tiri and Jake?” She laid beside the two longer figures, her hand enveloped one of Neytiri’s that laid flat over her slightly swollen stomach, Jake’s atop theirs as well. Her eyes admired Neytiri for a while, then turned to Jake and both, too, admired the human in return. It had been months after going into battle with the RDA’s people, and the three — the strong, enthralling bond now revealed from the exterior of their hearts and shun brightly upon the ancient lights of Pandora’s deep blue sky — decided to spend their celebration together, a silent prayer for those lost to the destruction and chaos brought upon them, a silent prayer being said to Eywa for gifting them this moment of life and peace. 

Jake shifted to lay on his side, his other hand reaching the girl’s delicate side softly before moving to stroke over Neytiri’s belly, with the simplicity of making them tremble below his touch, creating the motion for a while.

Neytiri nestled closer, lips elevating when she led her hand and placed it over the human’s chest, feeling the rise and fall created, inhaling the curious yet addicting flowery aroma wafted through her, ears picking up the melody Y/N’s heart tuned. It was absurd to her, when she first heard the news of how her love was thought to carry a weak heart, and here it was; Beating loud and clear. “Fortress means a place of safety?”

She hummed in response. “Safety is one of the meanings of it…but there’s also a sense of strength. Protection. A place of peace for one. Maybe even emotional resilience. Refuge and stability.” She giggled at the sensation of Neytiri’s cheek nuzzling against the skin of her shoulder, head turning to press a feather-like kiss over the azure tones of her forehead. “I admire the way you speak of things, ma Y/N.” she muttered, pupils growing within those golden hues peering up at Y/N.

The girl had an approximate, clear picture of Neytiri’s face, of the way bioluminescent specks glittering the pretty clashes of her sky and imperial blue complexion, and all the respiration once provided in her lungs seemed to have been pummeled away the longer she stared. Y/N’s soft grin clashed with the neutral twinkles of her eyes, “And I admire having you here with me, my love.”

Jake was quiet the entire time before offering his own response, for while his eyes took in the two women that had become his haven, his mind too wrapped up in the plagues of the current battle against the Sky People, if what, who he’d gained in this precise moment could have been torn from his grasp. The what if’s led to losing Neytiri if it hadn’t gone right, the child in her womb, the condition Y/N had, the possibility of losing her. The death of Grace, his dear friend who once despised him and grew to love him and care for him and Y/N. The haunting of many of the warrior’s deaths because of this fight, because of his acts and leads. It taunted him, it nearly tried tugging him back into a darkness he’d once been in.

“Come back to us, Jake.”

Aching was his heart yet he didn’t project it. Not when his Neytiri’s fingers reached and gently stroked across the side of his scalp, soon threading down the cascades of braids fallen over his shoulder. Not when he witnessed the content emitting from the two laying beside him. Not when peace now resided in their minds and thawed away those emotions. Not when they looked at him with the warmest of smiles, waiting for his response. So, he continued brushing the pads of his fingers down their skin, and he waited for the inevitable shiver to ripple through them, humming in satisfaction from the way her skin prickled beneath goosebumps.

“Fortress is the structure of those who give you both peace and strength and refuge, right?” They nodded, he hoisted himself much closer to them, his long arm enveloping them both.

“You became peace, angel, that heart of yours became my peace,” Y/N shuddered beneath his touch on her neck, hues boring into his ardent golden ones and his soft smile. He turned towards Neytiri, thumb stroking the apple of her cheek. “When we first came here, you became our refuge and strength, Neytiri,” Her name was enough to indicate that nickname that solely defined her; goddess of nature. Endearing it was, the way it perfected from his lips as they gently pressed over hers.

“You two, you girls are the embodiment of what fortress means to me. And this little bean right here,” his palm flattened over Neytiri’s womb, a fatherly sense blooming within his heart, “Is a part of our fortress.”

“Ma Jake…” Her smiling lips parted with a slow exhale, gazing at him in gentleness, and Y/N couldn’t help but giggle bashfully at the way he placed a firm kiss over her forehead. He grinned at their expressions, enjoying that one feeling that always followed every time he left them flustered. “It’s true though. This right here, is a fortress. One without the other is just bound to fall apart, and I don’t ever want to experience that again without my girls.”

“Pray this to Eywa, Jake. That my heart has the opportunity to give us peace in this fortress. That we have even more purpose to push forward.”

He hoisted himself on his elbow and pulled the girl between him and Neytiri, reached for her palm, and extended it to Y/N’s chest, his hand soon following afterwards. Clamorous, wavering, yet full of life was the girl’s heart. “Give me your hand,” he instructed, and her dainty palm was led to Neytiri’s chest; unnatural, graceful, firm. He then took her smaller hand, and placed it over his own swift, wild, vigorous.

“You feel this, Y/N? This heart?” She inhaled deeply only for her to catch Neytiri’s scent mingled with Jake’s — musky, sweet, earthy, rain incense, him, her, him, her, them — her eyes darting between his before descending into his face as she nodded. “Mine beats like this because of Neytiri, because of you.”

“Mine in return wavers for you both as well.”

Neytiri resonated with a soft giggle, bashfulness flushing her cheeks and reflected the position Jake was in, laying on her side. “Our hearts, they are one, ma Jake.”

“Hell…yeah they are.” He breathed out. The horizontal of her nose nuzzled with his, and a purr-like sound rumbled through his throat at the sensation, sighing in content when her mouth brushed over his cheek and her hand slid over his jaw while his own rested over her waist. Y/N could only watch from her spot between them, affection sprouting from her heart and spiraling throughout her body. That was until Neytiri pulled away slowly, Wide pupils colliding with hers and leaned in.

“seykxel txe’lan…” The flash of stark incisors gleamed, framed with the brilliance of a smile Y/N or Jake never thought to have seen at the beginning of their encounters. “Do not ever deny this heart’s strength. I have seen it, I have heard it. I have felt it. We feel her right now. She is and gives love, ma Y/N.” Kisses stroked over the girl’s skin. They shivered in the touches Jake now gave them both, each of them feeling an overwhelming wave consume them within the intimacy of this moment.

Breathlessly, the two beautiful women before him retracted from each other, and all he could do was stare. Stare, take in, and find peace and strength within it. Taking both their hands in his, a sweet kiss brushed over their knuckles; and that rascal was devious with his actions, letting his lips stray over the skin for just a second too long, tracing the way Neytiri’s stark incisors sunk into her lower lip, and Y/N could only squirm from the single act of affection.

He pulled Y/N into his chest, and Neytiri let out a laugh at the squeal from the girl until he too pulled her in his arms and he was adjusted between them now, his fingers climbing over their bare shoulders, their arms, thumbs stopping over the flesh of their cheeks. He stared in wonder at the way the colors of Neytiri identified with his own, at how Y/N’s neutral, flush tones contrasted with them beautifully before pecking both their foreheads.

Y/N shifted so her cheek now laid over his chest, while Neytiri’s head found solace beneath Jake’s chin, her braids brushing against the angle of his jawline. “So…are there any other purposes we’ll have forged in our fortress?”

Y/N’s head popped up, “Babies, duh!” Neytiri’s ears hitched at the word, shooting up to look at Jake with the equivalent of the sun’s bright rays, their flames combining and burning every ounce within Jake’s body as he liquified right before them.“That is a great purpose she has said. Eywa has been quick to bless us.”

He sighed and pressed them back into him, a hand falling over Neytiri’s belly. “Forgot how you two are so into those.”

“Ma sa’nok, wait no don’t say anything.” You told your mother-in-law as her palms rested over your belly while your eyes screwed shut, nerves jittering before her low chuckle filled your ears. “Wait, don’t say anything yet! Jake’s not even here yet!”

A tiny palm lightly smacked your cheek and your brows furrowed. “My baby Kiri, that hurt.” Another followed, and a squeal like giggle filled your ears making it impossible to not grin and peek at the baby girl in Neytiri’s arms beaming her little teeth at you. “Because you’re so cute, I forgive you.” you poked her cheek earning another squeal before closing your eyes once more.

Neytiri’s infectious giggles clearly reflected the sheer elation and boundless happiness that radiated from within you. “It does not matter if Mother confirms it, my lovely girl. It is more than obvious.”

“But how do you even know—”

“Pardon me, ‘ite,” Mo’at’s throat cleared from her current kneeling position, “May I remind you that Tsahik’s confirmation does indicate it.”

You couldn’t help but snicker at her tone of voice towards her daughter, hearing the sigh that followed afterwards. “Srane, Mother. Forgive me.”

Heavy steps and breaths filled your home, and it was then that you let your eyes open just to see a breathless, soaked Jake with little, giggling and soaked Neteyam bouncing happily in his arms. “I’m here! We’re here! D-did we miss it, did she confirm it already?”

Every woman present – including Kiri – could only stare at them in question as to why the two were brimming with water, Neytiri’s eyes narrowing at her husband. “What did you do to my son?”

He only waved her off, propping down beside you to drop a kiss to your cheek, then to Kiri’s, then to Mo’at who could only look at him bewildered, and lastly Neytiri’s. “Sorry, sorry, sorry – don’t worry about it, your kid is safe and sound and happy – look at baby boy,” he peered down at him with a broad grin and Neteyam only smiled widely at his mamas, reaching for you. “See? He’s fine – now what’s happening?”

“Y/N wants to confirm if she is with child.” Mo’at mused, thumbs tapping over the skin of your belly.

He groaned out a chuckle, and you threw him a glare. “Angel, you are pregnant.”

“But how can you guys know? You don’t know!”

He hunched himself forward until his mouth was ghosting over the shell of your ear, “We know your body, baby,” the point of his ear flickered against your cheek, “And this angel’s flawless body carries a baby in it,” he pulled back, a quirk between his brows and adjusted Neteyam in his arms as the little boy tried crawling over your laying body. “Well, technically it’s a little bean right now, not even a baby yet. It’s still forming, no, Tsahik? A brain, holes, eyes and nose, oh! Then a heart and–”

“Ma Jake.”

“Babygirl. I’m just sayin’, you’re pregnant.” He grinned widely, glancing at a squirming Neteyam and Kiri who was still in Neytiri’s arms. “Besides, these two constantly wanna be with their mommy Y/N and that means something��look at ‘em.” Kiri found herself free from her mother’s hold, perfectly crawling your way and laid her hands over your cheeks, curiosity shining those big golden eyes as to why you were laying down and her grandmother’s hands were on your stomach. And Neteyam, he simply rested his round head over your chest, cooing softly at you while the pink of his nose twitched as he gave you a gummy smile.

You couldn't help but marvel at the sight and the innocence of these precious beings. Their tiny noses, azure full cheeks, and fluttering eyelashes were all a testament to the beauty and perfection of nature. You felt her heart swell as you watched them, a feeling so overwhelming and pure that it brought tears to your eyes.

But you blinked them away, stroking their cheeks and sniffled, full of hope you glanced up at the Tsahik. “Well?”

Her mouth pursed and cheekbones hoisted, eyes glinted with joy. “Srane. ( yes ) Eywa shines upon you, ma’ite.”

A gasp hoyed itself from your lips, giving her a swift but tight hug and you grinned widely. “Tiri, Jake, I–I’m–”

“Srane, you are with child, dearest!” You sat up and watched how a sweet, exciting grin took over Neytiri’s lush mouth, the mouth you couldn't help but launch yourself too, uncaring to your mother-in-law’s presence who voiced an amused grunt and chuckle as she gathered her grandchildren in her arms. “I gather you want me to take these two out for a while?”

Jake chuckled half heartedly and ruffled his kids’ hair with a nod. “If it’s not so much trouble for you, please.”

She gave him a bow of her head, and stood up with the two in her arms. “Congratulations, Jakesully …take care of her.”

She left, and he was met with the sight of his wives’ giggling with one another, you straddled over her legs as she held you close, both brimming with immense joy. He walked your way, his eyes locked on Neytiri’s smiling ones and you turned to look at him with that bright grin of yours. “Jake, my love.”

“Angel…” He crouched down and firmed his hands to the ground as he leaned closer to your face. Your eyes darted between each feature of his as he reflected your own actions. He then plummeted when you jumped over his abdomen, tilting back under the firm pecks being met with his nose, his cheeks, his neck; his fingers winding over your hips, smoothing the skin there, and his smile lustred with delight. Delight that increased its rays when Neytiri settled beside him; delight that was a response of you and hers, for both were loved immensely by him, and that love would only increase within this fortress forever. It’s perhaps his greatest privilege yet in acceptance of this second chance, to provide love and protection for their fortress.

“We’re gonna be parents again!” Neytiri let out another airy laugh at your squeal, “Thank Eywa, we are!” and wrapped her arms around you once more to pull you into another sweet, much more passionate kiss. Jake smiled to himself, ears perked and let his lips fall over the toned juncture of Neytiri’s collarbone while his hand rubbed lower down your hip bone. The longer the kiss continued, the greedier his touches became, and the more your crave for them flourished.

“You’re gonna be a dad, Jake.” Lips, swollen and lush, blew out a sharp exhale when his long fingers dipped below your thin lower garments while his other hand teasingly curled around the length of Neytiri’s anticipating tail. “Apparently I am.”

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

“Okay, well…” Dr. Mason, brow creased in what seemed to be perplexed, and the way her tone carried awareness managed to augment your atmosphere; something wasn’t right. Something didn’t feel right. Ordinarily, her voice was one to convey tranquility to all doubts that assisted you the second you showed up for an appointment, but today, that tranquility had vanished, her words frail as if with one wrong term it would break without hesitation. “There has been…responses from your ultrasound,”

The persistence of this quietness spiked an abundance of hesitations and emotions consumed your mind into torment and propelled it to a precipice, plunging into a tumultuous river of dreadful possibilities. Both your spouses were able to sense the unpleasant adjustment in your state of mind.

“From the looks of it, no heartbeat has been ascertained. Now, I don’t want us to jump to any conclusions yet but–”

“No heart?” Neytiri’s curt voice interjected, an anger already detected and soaring from her while Jake only furrowed his brow as he processed this, and you didn’t have much choice but to let them do and say whatever it was as your mind’s thoughts consumed you whole. “How is there no heart? Tsahik said there is a child in her, and that more than enough proves there is heart. Your machine is wrong”

“What? There’s something wrong with the baby or…?”

“Look, sometimes a heart isn’t able to be heard this early in a pregnancy–”

“Neytiri’s mother said there’s a baby there.” Jake shook his head in unacceptance of her words, hand gripping yours tightly. “There was a heart there yesterday, and the day before too. Now you’re saying there’s no heart? That doesn’t make sense.”

“Sully, if you’d let me explain instead of constantly cutting me off, you would find me saying that this may not be what you think it is, which is a miscarriage.”

“Miscarriage?”

She nodded towards the confusion of Neytiri’s face. “Indicating the loss of the fetus from not developing properly.”

All that now recapitulated was that very word; Miscarriage. Your heart could not take this pregnancy, and this baby had to pay the price of your heart’s weakness. Your breakfast menaced to coil at the mere thought Of course there was another thing your body was unable to maintain. At some point your mind was inattentive, completely muffling the heated exchange between your wife and the doctor, Norm coming in to try and calm Jake down.

You gulped thickly, welcoming the throbbing pain it gave your throat, and let your feet guide you out of this small facility and into Pandora’s forest, though not without Neytiri and Jake tailing. “Baby, Y/N….”

You didn’t even bother to question how quick they reached you while Jake’s arm gate kept you from walking any further into the woods. “She hasn’t confirmed anything yet, angel, let’s–”

“J-Jake move– I don’t wanna go back—” Cold, hot, bothered, confused, shuddering under the coat of your perspiration and your cascade of tears. Neytiri had knelt down and cradled you to her chest, her own tears of frustration and grief spilled over her cheeks. Childbirth had not been one of easiness for the Na’vi, but never had this…thing the humans call miscarriage had ever happened. “Shh, seykxel txe’lan. Breathe–”

“Do not call me that.” you spat out with a strangled gasp, seething at those two words falling from Neytiri’s lips. “My heart gave out on our baby– how can you still call me that? Can you even feel another heartbeat?” Her hold on you consolidated, hand soothing over your head while Jake’s eyes squeezed shut and shook his head as he reached for you. “Just yours. And Neytiri’s, and mine. That’s enough for us.”

“How can you say something like that?” You backed away from his touch, and Neytiri too couldn’t help but pin her eyes on him infuriated and hurt. He couldn’t help but hastily turn to each of his sides, eyes searching and darting around for his wrongdoing. “Jake, we have lost our child.”

He could only frown at Neytiri’s words, and his heart was tugged on as your face obscured into her chest and tightened your arms around her. “Baby,” his tone was pleading and hushed, gently grabbing your shoulders, insinuating for you to spare him a glimpse of those eyes of yours. “Angel, I just want you to be alright…c’mere.”

You gave in and fell into his arms, not able or caring to conceal your tears. “I just lost my baby, idiot,” you sniffled, pushing your cheek against his shoulder blade. “I’m not alright.”

That night, an indescribable agony writhed up your spine and ruptured its way to your battered heart, seizing it, constricting the organ until a gut-wrenching wail relinquished from deep within your lungs, one that startled the children from their peaceful slumber, Kiri’s wails assisting your distressing chorus. It made Jake and Neytiri briskly emerge from their current position around you, peering down at you in alert then at the kids. 

“Neytiri.” 

“Srane ( yes ).” Neytiri’s warmth was hesitant to depart from you yet eventually did, and you briefly thought it was to go and calm Neteyam and Kiri while Jake grabbed ahold of your face. “C’mon angel. Talk to me, what’s happening?”

“Toilet…bag…outside…something.” were the only words you could muster out from the seeping torment pooling down your abdomen, and by the twisted look upon your face, Jake’s brows shot up and deftly gathered you in his arms before climbing out of the hammock. “Ma Jake, what is wrong with her!”

“She’s sick – Neytiri, get the kids out for a bit.” His jaw already quivered at the sounds writhing within your throat, holding you close as he settled down on the floor. She didn’t question him, lightly bouncing ‘Teyam and Kiri in her arms and gave you two a brief glance before she walked out of their home. He propped you over a seat-like log, letting out a shaky breath as he watched you, waited for you to say something, anything.

Your muscles constricted, coiled, assembling to split with each throat-rippling cry. The urgency of your bleeding intensified without limits as you sat on the ground with your head dipped down, tears streaming down your contorted face. Jake shifted before you, ears and tail flicking in distress as he knelt beside you, making every effort to comfort you, even though both of you understood that the intensity of your current ordeal was not easily appeased.

“What can I do to help! Y/N, c’mon say something! Lemme help you, please!”

Your eyes clamped shut, teeth gritting together, knuckles draining their color and you shook your head violently, giving him the answer of your refusal of help. “Angel…please.”

Expressing precisely what you desired from him proved to be a challenging endeavor. Although you simply sought his — your babies, and Neytiri’s presence, articulating this need became a formidable task. Jake, your protecting husband, grew restless, grappling with the fear of being unable to alleviate your anguish. As he knelt helplessly by, tears threatened to fall down his face but he contained them, and the weight of your bloodshed enveloped his azure tones. He bore witness to one of his darkest fears materializing before his eyes.

“What is happening?” Neytiri came into view, eyes alert and frantic, her arms discarded of the children giving Jake the notion they were with Mo’at. A soft gasp left her at the sight of you quivering and rocking yourself, Jake’s hand rubbing circles on your back as misery scrunched his face. “Y/N…”

“Tiri…” the broken whimper of you calling for her anguished her, and wasted no time in latching to your side, her fingers brushing away the damp curls pressed over your forehead, “Lovely girl…it is alright, we are here…” She didn’t care for the red tainting your skin, she gathered your small frame in her hold, carefully tilted your head over her chest and rocked you in her arms as you reacted quickly to grasp onto her. “I-it’s not comfortable…”

The passage of time brought no respite even with Neytiri’s hold on you, and your unease persisted for hours. Desperation led you to crawl out of Neytiri’s lap and onto the woven floor on hands and knees, seeking relief. Brief solace was discovered momentarily as you assumed a facing down fetal position, attempting to shield yourself from the relentless onslaught of your rigid uterus on your fortitude.

Jake had left to make a quick stop at the human outpost, upon your request for something cold to consume, maybe something similar to ice in the mini freezers they kept there, though he felt disinclined to follow your orders. He didn’t want to leave, but Neytiri gave him the assurance that you will be fine, that she will keep close with everything you did. He listened, of course, undoubtedly peeking his enhanced hearing in from the distance. You then requested for a bath while he was out to which she complied, hoping the water’s calmness would offer some relief.  A soreness took over, yet you welcomed the capacity of it, letting the saltiness of your tears combined with its droplets pelting your skin. You still trembled from its temperature, yet the act worked somehow.

Neytiri’s heart ached upon witnessing the moon’s glow over your bare, fragile figure practically sinking within the water. “My love…”

“W-where‘s Kiri and Teyam?”

Her mouth twitched into a tiny smile, striding herself towards you. “They are with Mother. They wanted to sleep a bit more.”

“ ‘m sorry for waking them up. And for disturbing your sleep, Neytiri.” Words, meek and muffled within your knees, were heard clearly by the Omaticayan woman who sighed in response, “Ma Y/N…” Your legs had now slowly disappeared into the water and you were seated up, round eyes glimmering with tears peering back at her as she settled behind you, her thumb reaching to dab away the fallen tears. “Never apologize for this.”

Her neck craned forward to softly kiss your damp cheek, then your temple before offering you a safe haven within her neck, your meek whimpers flattening her ears and your tears soaking her skin.

She held you, swayed you side to side, allowing you to crumble completely in her embrace, words softly encouraging you to let it out. “W-why does my heart hate me?”

“Ma seykxel txe’lan,” she whispered, eyes illuminating her own shed of tears, and permitted her heart to shatter into pieces at how you believed such things of your own heart. 

“I know I’m not perfect, but I try doing things right. Why is it never enough? Why am I not enough? Why is my heart not playing the part you call it? Be strong? I try to convince myself as much as you are that it is, but it’s not.” Shards were each syllable of your words, and you welcomed its scorching slices within your flaring throat. 

Once more, it made you contemplate your path with faith; was it not an entity capable of breeding only eternal misery? Hadn't all your engagement with it generated outcomes such as these? You accepted then, that it had never been a positive path at all, and your reliance on it diminished only from your own gullibility. 

Neytiri’s nose nuzzled against your cheek as she continued to hold you, and she cried for you, for the loss of your child. “You are more than enough. And your heart is strong enough to endure this, my seykxel txe’lan. Do not fault it, do not fault yourself. Eywa will and continues to shine down on you with just your existence.”

“Neytiri.”

She continued despite the protest in your tone, devoted to engraving her belief in your head. “You did nothing wrong. You are perfect as you are. I will not ever stop calling you seykxel txe’lan, because you are. My seykxel txe’lan, my perfect, lovely girl. No fault on you.”

Her lips fall over every part of your face, including your fluttering eyelids as tears once more kiss your waterline. Both of you felt another presence, and you shuddered out a breath when Jake’s body dipped into the water in front of you, encasing you and Neytiri between his bent legs. You peered up, being met with his gentle smile and amber irises. “C’mere, my beautiful girls.”

He was quick to pick up on the swaying Neytiri created around your frame, and his arms winded around her with your much smaller body between them, making it easy for him to hold the both of you and continue the slow sways Neytiri motioned. “May be a bad time to mention but…the ice melted on my way back, angel.”

Your whispered giggle against his neck made their ears flicker, mouths smiling softly down at you. “ ‘T’s okay…I have everything I need right here.” They held you like this until sunrise, the three of you allowing and welcoming every ounce of pain derived, and Neytiri continued whispering sweet reassurances while Jake stroked your skin until you fell into a deep slumber from all the blood, sweat, and tears.

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

12 months later

“My strong warrior, come here! ‘Teyam, come here!” You patted your thighs, beckoning the now walking 1 month old baby boy to run your way. He flashed you an adorable smile, little legs leading your way with each encouraging word. Though it seemed his sister thought this to be some sort of baby race, because she managed to speed those little feet of hers and land in your arms with a loud squeal as you lost balance and fell on your bum onto the grassy ground with her in your hold.

“My brilliant Kiri,” you laughed at her tactics, how her gabbling words filled your ears as she reached for your cheeks. “Sa’nu!” ( mommy ) she exclaimed, and threw her brother a cheeky smile when he caught up to her. “Kiri, kehe! Sa’nu!” ( no! Mommy! )

You grunted out a chuckle as both shoved the other to be in their mommy’s arms. The two were practically the size of a human toddler, but you still managed to prop them both upon your thighs and nuzzled kisses to their round cheeks. “Relax, you two. There is plenty of me to go around for my beautiful babies.” You grinned, and Kiri could only let out a ‘humph’ as Neteyam triumphantly snuggled his head into your chest. He had the custom to hold a look of concentration in those big eyes of his, always softening when he found what he was looking for and nuzzled himself deeper; it was a tactic you adored of him, a tactic that reminded you of his father.

“Good morning, my little one! It’s your mommy too! Just listen to your older siblings, fighting over me. Looks like you may have competition.” You cooed down to your stomach, glancing up at the way Neteyam pulled away and Kiri looked at you curiously. There was quite a difference to your stomach now within a few weeks, a peculiar, little roundness that bursted you with joy, and the hormonal shifts were noticeable, especially with the way these two behaved around each other and you.

“Sa’nu?” You brushed your fingers through Kiri’s bangs as she stared down, her little brows furrowed in question as she babbled down to the petite swell of your belly. “That’s your little baby sister or brother, Kiri.” You whispered excitedly, and her little mouth pucker brought laughter from you. You turned to Neteyam who had been awfully quiet, his big honey eyes squinting at you then at what his sister had now been babbling to. 

“Prrnen? ( baby ?)” He questioned, his tiny blue finger pointing and you grinned. “Srane, ‘Teyam. Prrnen.” His face carried a cute ponder-like expression, and a small smile broke out before his stomach propped over your thigh and laid a palm over your belly. “Prrnen!”

Neytiri, standing from a small distance as she prepared her bow and arrow to gather some fish, brought her gaze up to look at the scene before her, a warm smile decorating her features as her eyes twinkled in happiness. She had been longing for this, for you to be with child, and she was sure her prayers to Eywa had been heard, thanking her with every second for this wonderful blessing. Many complications and struggles happened over the months of course, and there were moments where she thought you perhaps were about to give up in fulfilling this lovely dream of yours, yet here you were, a heart happier and stronger than ever.

Jake was currently sitting over a rock in silence, and in his hands were a small blade and wood as he expertly dragged the sharp tool into it, shaping it into a figure for his kids. His locs, loose and wildly ascended over his shoulders, swayed at the head tilt he gave your way. “5 weeks. Ain’t it a bit too early to call it a baby?”

“Ma Jake.” Neytiri hissed, shooting him a pointed glare.

Kiri tore herself from you, giving your belly one final pat before wobbling through the shallow waters and towards her father. “Daddy!” He placed his items down and pulled her onto her lap with a smile. “Hey baby girl…right it’s too soon to call that a prrnen?”

“No, it’s not.” You rolled your eyes at his grumble, returning your focus on your stomach. “That’s your grumpy sempu ( daddy ), baby. He’s been grumpy for quite some time now, and no one knows why.” Your voice dropped to a mysterious whisper, grinning as Neteyam released bubbles of giggles against you. “But don’t pay him no mind, he loves you just as much as we do.”

She was unable to resist such a moment, and with that Neytiri placed her sempul’s ( father ) bow down, and rushed into the small lake, right where you happened to be seated in. “Yawntutsyìps.” ( little loved ones ) she crooned, a palm residing over your stomach while the other ruffled Neteyam’s dark hair. “Sa’nok!” She beamed that beautiful smile of hers, one that complimented her every feature and you hummed as she gave you a gentle kiss. “Ma seykxel txe’lan…”

“And this right here, is your other mama, strong and gorgeous Neytiri.” You grinned at how she stroked the skin, a hint of amusement shining her golden eyes at how you whispered sweet nothings to the life you nurtured within your womb. Engaging in conversations with your unborn baby became one of your cherished pastimes after discovering your pregnancy. You often found yourself speaking to your baby in the mornings or during moments of free time, despite Jake’s stoned expressions, the one he was doing in this exact moment as he walked towards you with Kiri in his hold, happily toying with the unfinished figure her father was working on.

Neytiri took part in talking to your stomach as well, and when Jake was present for it, you both always ended up with his sharp gaze on you, inspecting, the usual mirth coloring his irises completely washed away with the subtle glare he gave. It did brew some sort of uncomfortable feeling in you, but you or Neytiri never brought the issue up, and he never provided a reason behind it.

“We’re all very excited to meet you soon, right Tiri? Right Jake?”

Neytiri kissed your cheek, chuckling when Neteyam crawled into her lap but still kept his palm over your stomach. “Srane, lovely girl. We are very excited.”

A tiny smile flickered across Jake’s face as he crouched down beside you, balancing Kiri on his thigh. “I’m happy because my girls and kids are excited. If you’re happy, I’m happy.”

Water droplets had soothed beautifully down the flexing muscles of his large thighs right before your eyes, and something about him carrying one of your children made your insides twist. The subtle smirk you offered him was a familiar one, one that made his brow hitched. “You look nice.” 

“I’m glad you think so.” He muttered, releasing Kiri as she tried writhing from his hold to go join her brother. He took liberty in scooting and settling down really close to you, to the point where his chin rested over the top of your head. 

“Bet I could make you feel nice. With my mouth, though, of course.”

Neytiri, her cobalt tones shimmering delightfully under the sun’s peeking light, smirked at your act and words, picking up on the low groan rumbling in Jake’s throat.The way she stared at you made you stride your tongue over your lower lip and smile sweetly at her. “My pretty Tiri.”

A lust consumed those eyes as her face slightly flushed at the nickname. Neteyam found himself sitting beside Kiri in the water, and Neytiri took a chance in shifting closer, her hand reaching to grope the expanse of your thigh. She smiled, pleased at the way her palm practically enveloped your flesh, the way it sizzled beneath her touch, and she had to keep her canines from sinking into her lower lip at the sound you made. 

“Choose your words wisely, yawnetu. ( loved one )” she mused, and Jake’s hot breath fanned over the skin below your jawline, his own palm rested over your stomach and you shuddered. “Yeah, listen to our pretty Tiri,” his tone was mocking, and he snickered at how her teasing glower. “wouldn’t wanna do anything to harm it. Or that heart of yours.”

He pecked your flustered cheek before standing up and easily brought you to your feet as well and Neytiri gathered Kiri and Neteyam’s little hands in hers. “C’mon now, let’s go home.”

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

The Omaticayan people always welcomed and celebrated the cherishing birth of new life. New life unraveled new beginnings, a flourishing prosperity for their clan, and a gift from Eywa herself. Especially if that new life, that gift sprung from their leader, Olo’eyktan, once known as Toruk Makto, Jake Sully and his wife, Palulukan Makto, a warrior, Neytiri te Suli. The Na’vi were mystified when the new life didn’t come from Neytiri herself, but you, Y/N te Suli, and of course, they thought it had not been possible for you to birth one of them, yet you nor Jake and Neytiri knew if this new life brewing inside you will come out as one of them if you consider the options you’d taken. But the confirmation and approval of Eywa through their Tsahik alleviated those questioning doubts, and they had immediately wished to celebrate and honor this news.

The decision rested on their leader, Olo’eyktan Jake Sully, who, though initially hesitant, ultimately gave his approval, driven by a sense of obligation and devotion to Neytiri and you.

Neytiri retorted, her hands delicately rearranging Jake's thick dreadlocks, "You must don the customary attire befitting the role of Olo’eyktan, ma Jake." Jake, visibly frustrated, responded with a sigh, "I understand, but it feels so damn heavy!"

“That’s why your shoulders are so squared and strong though.” You took your focus off of Kiri’s hair who was perched on your lap and dozing off, and grinned over your shoulder. You watched as his current frowning face perked at your words. Once taming her husband’s hair and giving him a quick peck, she made her way towards you. Her chest covering radiated with vibrant feathers, harmoniously contrasting the velvety azure of her skin. Around her neck, a cascade of necklaces stood as poignant symbols of her familial ties, while her dark braids intertwined with an array of multicolored trinkets, creating a captivating visual tapestry.

"Would you permit me to do your hair, lovely girl?" She whispered against your lips, her fingers gently caressing the strands that frame your face. With a subtle bite on your lip, you nodded in agreement. "If it's not too much trouble—"

"Anything connected to you is never troubling," she replied, giving the subtle roundness of your belly a soothing rub, and you chuckled in response. As she positioned herself behind you, her skilled fingers meticulously parted and wove through the locks of your head. "Jake's influence is quite evident on you," you teased, causing her to giggle and roll her eyes at your comment.

"No one can surpass the original," Jake quipped as he playfully held Neteyam upside down, attempting to keep him still while putting on a necklace crafted by his proud father.

"Neteyam, stay still, boy. Calm your ass down!" He huffed, prompting Neytiri to hiss at him. "How many times have I told you to watch your mouth?" Neytiri's loud remark awakened Kiri from her nap, her hazy eyes and ears flickering. "Mommy? Sa’nok?"

"Shh, it's okay, my brilliant girl," you reassured, gently pulling her head back onto your chest. "Daddy's just being noisy right now." Kiri gave you a lazy smile before shooting her unaware father a glare and closing her eyes once more.

"Kiri, 'ite, wake up," Neytiri whispered to her. "After I'm done with sa’nu’s hair, we must go, okay? We must get ready for the festivity." In response, Kiri whined and dramatically sprawled herself on the ground, eliciting laughter from you while Neytiri sighed. "Just like your father, unfortunately."

His laughter echoed, a genuine sound that elicited a contented hum from you. It had been weeks since you last heard him laugh so authentically, and now you eagerly pursued the lingering echoes, entwining yourself in the lasting warmth it brought. And at this Neytiri’s mouth lifted, giving your shoulders a squeeze, already knowing how much this would please you, and her as well if she was to be sincere.

“We don’t have to go, y’know? I mean, being chief gives me the right to cancel so…if you aren’t up for it. ‘t’d make Kiri less dramatic and this one would calm down.” He crooned at the boy that curled in his arms, finger stroking below his ear to his cheek, and Neteyam’s sudden soft babbles filled the atmosphere.. He then stood in front of you, crouching down to gather Kiri in his arms, though not before pecking your cheek then Neytiri’s mouth, at this you flinched as you watched; the affection he gave his children or Neytiri shouldn’t stir any ounce of jealousy in you, it was absurdly irrational from your part and yet completely out of your control. By reason of the long while Jake had let himself hold, kiss, touch you for no long enough to lose himself in you like he usually would, and hurt resided in you at this.

“Syor, Y/N.” ( relax ) Neytiri’s words whispered within your ear, already sensing the spike to your heart rate. “Do not let him get to you.” Though reassurance laced her voice, irritation towards Jake edged it. You only sighed and tore your eyes from Jake; deciding to point your focus on your vitality contending against your contemporary condition of debility. An inkling of it possibly disrupting your night tormented your mind. “Just because you’re chief, marine, doesn’t mean you can go and ruin this for others. This is important, especially to me. You know this. Or are us and your people celebrating the coming of our child not important to you? That’s what you’re trying to say?”

He swallowed hard at the old nickname you regarded him with, but he rolled his eyes. “I think everyone present here knows that what you’re saying is nowhere near what I just or have been saying, baby. Or is it, Neytiri?” Both him and you fixated your gaze on the lithe woman behind you, brows jumping as her mouth formed an ‘o’ before releasing a laugh that indicated how ridiculous this seemed to her. “Ma Jake, do not ask me any silly questions, or to our Y/N right now. Settle your children down before Mother comes to help place your attire.”

Mo’at greeted each one of you, Neytiri assisting her mother in delicately but perfectly descended the traditional feathered piece over his shoulders, and Jake caught a glimpse of the smirk flickering yours and Neytiri’s mouth as the head piece tangled around his ears. But he said nothing, simply shaking his head and prepared for whatever was bound to happen next.

The night had already commenced to a vertiginous beginning; the loud rumbles of the drums, the chants, the brightness of multicolored lights, the People, the strained conversations. You’d think it wouldn’t overwhelm you the way it did considering this is precisely what you experience almost every night, and that overwhelm you carried had Jake tear away his entire attention from his People and fixated on you who’d been seated right in front of him, his jaw tightening in hence to contain the ‘Told you so’ sitting at the tip of his tongue. Neteyam and Kiri, sleepiness completely washed from their system and replaced with a bundle of energy as they squealed and ran around with the other children, and Neytiri had been engaged in a conversation with her mother that you didn’t want to interrupt seeing the serious demeanor they carried.

Fatigue settled deep within your bones and not even a whole hour had passed. You seeked for something, someone familiar among the dancing blue bodies, and you practically beamed when spotting dear old Norm, panting and laughing from the dancing he partook in, walking your way. 

“Y/N/N! What’re you doin’ here just sitting? You should be celebrating—” His brows crashed when he noticed your drained expression, your posture, and crouched down to gently place a large palm over your forehead. “You alright? Hey, what’s wrong?”

You mustered a small smile and nodded under his hold, bringing both hands to softly grab his own and removed it from your forehead. “Don’t worry, Norm. I’m good! Just a little tired, but that’s it.”

Norm had grown to become a good friend to both you and Jake, and he’d been very attentive to your health and supportive of your pregnancy, he’d been a listening ear for you when things got a bit fickle with Jake and Neytiri. So it didn’t surprise you when Norm was unconvinced of your feign reassurance, eyes shifting over to a rather distressed looking Jake as he towered over you from behind, hoping to gain some intuition of the situation. None was offered, at least not in front of you, and you glanced up to see the silent exchange between the two Na’vi men, something you were unaware of.

This infuriated you, observing the way they communicated so perfectly without the utterance of words about something that clearly involved you. You grumbled out an ‘excuse me’ before standing and making your way towards your little ones who’d been playing close to the expanse of the Hometree, both pairs of round eyes widening and smiling at the sight of you. “Sa’nu!”

“My babies,” you grinned, giggling when Neteyam’s arms loosely wrapped around your waist with his ear pressed against your belly. “Tsmukan.” ( brother ) he happily crooned, and Kiri’s brows furrowed as she shook her head. “Kehe. Tsmuke.” ( sister )

You laughed at the glare she gave the boy while he remained unbothered and simply nuzzled his nose to your flesh. “It is too early to tell if it’s a boy or girl. But either one, I’m sure you will love them very much.” Your hands fall over their heads when you knelt, lovingly stroking your fingers through their dark strands and smiling down at them, feeling an ease settle down on you despite the tiredness you felt. 

Neteyam must have sensed it, for he peered up at you with a look in his eyes you couldn’t quite make out as his ear pressed over your heartbeat. “Sa’nu…sleep?” He questioned. Damn was it that easy to tell?

“A little bit, my warrior. But I’ll be fine, don’t worry.” You reassured the boy. He made a grunting sound and glanced at Kiri before they pulled away to grab your hands, lightly pulling you near the tree’s surface, between the thick roots. “S-sit.”

Their actions left you a bit dubious but you followed them, slowly sliding down with a sigh and smiled softly at them. “You two are a blessing, y’know that?” They only settled down on each of your side and wrapped their little arms around you, soft babbles being exchanged with the two. 

Children may be clueless at times, but they certainly weren’t stupid, you thought. And if they were able to indicate what you felt, then it must be because it was clearly written in your face, and being able to settle down without having the eyes of the People on you brought down the waves of weariness, the verge of nearly collapsing.

“The…pregnancy is doing this to her, you say?” Mo’at’s voice, perplexed and firm.

The one responding afterwards was recognized as Jake’s refrain, strangled and raspy. “Yeah. She’s been trying to hide it, but we can tell it’s taking a number on her, and she’s not doing a damn good job at hiding this!”

“It is a child, ma Jake. You cannot judge her or the child too harshly now. But,” a sigh followed; Neytiri. “It is true, ma sa’nok. Every day, she becomes more frail … and we have no choice but to see her fall apart like this.”

“Perhaps we should let her stay here instead of going to the human outpost. It will do her good if I keep checking on her, no?”

“With all due respect, Tsahik,” Norm. “She has to keep going to the outpost in order to see if this pregnancy and her health are maintaining balance—”

“Yeah well, a fat load of crap that is to see if she’s maintaining balance.”

“Jake, please calm down. Besides, it does seem like a normal response from the twins in her stomach so she is gonna have to constantly come by—”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“What do you mean by twins?”

Silence ebbed, one of thickness and delirious, one that you felt from the center of your being at the revelation, yet your silence was otherwise. Not one, but two pure souls growing in your womb, you thought anticipatingly, though that warm happiness was quick to dissolve from the biting tone of none other than Jake. “What the hell do you mean by twins, Norm? You didn’t say this the other day. It’s not possible!“

“I…we couldn’t confirm it just yet. The ultrasound was iffy, and it took Dr. Mason some time to go through it until she realized it. think about it, though; the rapid growth of her belly, the way she looks more and more tired—”

“Yeah because that thing is draining everything she’s got!”

“Twins are not capable of happening for the Na’vi…it is a rare occurrence, yet a blessing—”

“But Y/N isn’t a part of the Na’vi, not physically. And this isn’t a blessing, this isn’t even supposed to be happening–”

“She wants to be a mother, we cannot deny her this. She is happy, you should be happy—”

“I am, believe me, I am happy if she’s happy, if you’re happy, Neytiri. But not when this…baby is practically killing her from the inside slowly with each passing second. Or what— you wanna lose her?”

“I never said that! But we cannot keep getting in the way of this dream that she wishes for so profoundly—”

“I don’t want her having this baby, there I said it.”

Silence condensed once more, and you have to take a quick peek to the children in your hold, both gratefully sound asleep despite the escalating tone of the others, and you have to raise a palm to your mouth in order to contain the sob threatening to hurl from your throat at Jake’s revelation.

“Jakesully. A child is a gift sent from Eywa, whether your wife is Na’vi or not. And It is up to both you and my daughter to support her, no matter your train of thought.”

“Norm, back me up here.” Nothing. “Neytiri, don’t tell me you want her having this thing, do you really want to lose her like this–”

“That thing is a child. Our child, children, Toruk. You can either accept it or not, but it will not change her mind, or mine.”

Inhaling deeply in hopes to find a steady pace to your racketing heart at the most expeditious pace, you gently shake the children awake. “Come on, we must get back to your mama and father.” Both Neytiri and Jake’s ears flicker at the sound at your heartbeat assisted with Neteyam’s and Kiri’s, Jake’s gaze flitting down to the two other beats that happened to be purely beating within your stomach. Mo’at, a firm demeanor upon her and Norm, looking down at the ground, said nothing as your presence was between them all.

“Angel, you alright–”

“I think it’s best I head back with the kids.”

Neytiri was the one to take you back while the Tsahik and Jake continued with the festivity, not wanting to abruptly call everything off and reassured the People everything was fine. 

When your beautiful wife sauntered your way, a final peer to the children who were sound asleep, with ease she settled you within the hammock, crawling in beside you and like all nights, she held you close; yet tonight was different, tonight was as if she had been hit with the realization of the very words Jake uttered; her hold on you was almost despairing, swallowing the entire length of your body with her prolonged one while her chest produced the deepest of exhales and clutched onto you. Gulping, you tilted your head up at her; honey-like orbs hidden beneath shuddering eyelids, her lips obtrude, and gentle words somehow found a way to soothe from their trembling act.

“Neytiri…do you want to have these babies?”

Her eyes nearly snapped open but settled for a gentle gaze, and you saw the way she immediately picked up on your usage of ‘babies’ instead of the singular word giving her the wretched notion that you had heard their conversation. She prompted a flicker of a sad smile and nodded while giving your cheek a light stroke. “My desires are your desires, seykxel txe’lan.” Firm, confident, sadness all molded into those words, and you wholly believed her.

Another question climbed painfully up your throat, one that was thrown out when Jake had finally made his way back with you, clutching you and Neytiri the same way she had; “Do you want to have these babies?”

You looked at him, and Neytiri’s eyes only fell shut when he stared up and laid his chin over your head. 

“We want what you want, angel.”

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

“May I speak with you for a moment, ma Tsahik?”

You entered her den, strides reluctant and nervous, and Mo’at’s gaze glowered curiously and slightly displeased at your usage of formality. “Now what have I told you about addressing me like that, eh?”

You released a weak chuckle, muttering a small apology as you walked her way. “I’ve been out of it for a while now, but again, forgive me.”

She smiled as you settled down beside her and nodded in understanding. “It is common with your state of being right now. Do not apologize.” You glanced at her in curiosity before it hit you. “I forgot you already knew.”

She laughed, “Tsahik knows it all.” Your mouth twitched before the corners pushed down. “I don’t mean that…” you inhaled sharply, “I overheard your conversation the night before. With Jake. And Neytiri. And Norm.”

Her smile faltered at your revelation but did not rush to assist any excuses to it, for she knew it was very much explanatory enough. “I did have…suspicions of it already before that talk, however.” she pointed out and then sighed. “I assume…that is why you are here, ‘ite?”

You nodded, and the herbs currently in her hand are placed down so she can provide her attention to you. “I am not upset with you, but I am upset with…”

“Jakesully’s words?” She questioned and you nodded. Mo’at, growing to become a mother figure within your life, was wisest as a voice of reason – partially for being Tsahik of course – and provided guidance when caring for yourself became too hefty, when your relationship with her daughter and Clan Leader had its difficulties.

She bowed her head as a gesture for you to proceed. “You know how much I’ve longed for this, for carrying my very own children, but you also have heard of the difficulties I’ve been having because of this longing given my condition,” Her hand reached to place over the palm that rested over your belly, smiling slightly at you. “And it’s difficult, yes. But…Jake is so apprehensive about it and Neytiri too worries, and I understand why, I love them because they worry and care for me.” Your fingers twitched, eyes gaining a glassed surface and sniffled “But I want this, sa’nok. And yes, you’ll be the first I’ll verbally admit to that I am exhausted almost every day, but that doesn’t matter to me! What motivates me is that I’m meant to carry life, these beautiful lives, that I’ll be giving Neteyam and Kiri more reliance, I’ll be giving Neytiri and Jake another to love wholly–”

“You will be able to birth and be someone’s blood mother.” You stayed quiet, rubbing soft circles over your belly and nodded. “Neteyam and Kiri are my children, and I know I am their mother as much as Neytiri is but…I’ve wanted to experience carrying a child, does that make sense? And Jake doesn't understand, Neytiri is supportive and I’m sure she wants this but I’m afraid…”

Tears have omitted down your cheeks, and both her palms now have raised to cradle your face. “Oh ma’eveng… you’re afraid she too does not want you to have these children.” You’ve had a challenging time grasping the conversation they had shared, and nodded your head. She gave you a soft smile, one that enriched the maturity of her features.

“They do love you very much, and I am sure you know that. I cannot speak for Jakesully in this case because I do not know the specific events of his life, as for my daughter…” Melancholy swarmed her gaze and you caught on to what subject was bound to be brought up. “A lot within her changed when her sister departed from us. Neytiri’s brilliance and precautions sharpened with the Sky People. She had sworn right in front of Eywa to not ever trust them again,” she chuckled half heartedly and you couldn't help but do the same. “But how I knew how much she enjoyed the curiosity always brightened when she and Sylwanin learned about them with Grace. And she tried to simmer it down, she nearly convinced me it had completely faded. 

“But then you and him came along, and that night you were brought to our village, I saw it again; that curiosity. Brimming within her, wrestling with the swear she had made. A fickling light Neytiri was. And I will admit, I was hesitant when I saw it, when it led to love…but you both brought something within her back to life. Neytiri loves you eternally. Jake loves you profoundly as well. Now, my daughter would never ask this of you, to not have these children; but of course she is afraid. And while Jake’s statements were rather harsh, his behavior, and her fear, are being driven by that love.”

“And I love them as well, so so much but I just–”

“However, that love should not hinder the act of you making choices.” she firmly stated. “Especially when it comes to your happiness, your mind, heart, and body. The very body that you have taken care of after many events of hurting. You deserve this, ‘ite. The Great Mother has rewarded you for your suffering, and you shall welcome it, no matter what they say.”

Stutters spewed from your mouth as you now sobbed within her hold. “B-but he said–”

“Words lie. Words deceive.” she reminded you. “Actions prove otherwise when it comes from here,” her hand fell to your chest, “ the heart. And if your heart desires a child which is not unnatural, then they will be easy to love. You desire this?”

“More than anything, ma sa’nok.”

She smiled, carefully dabbing away the tears over your cheeks. “They want this, despite the deceiving words. They love you, and want to continue this family with you, child.”

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

“Do you still love me, Jake? Neytiri, does he?” Not so far and not so deep into the forest, but far enough from ears to hear the seeth in your voice, far enough from eyesight to witness the tears rolling down your cheeks. Neytiri’s ear twitched at your words, mouth frowning as she crouched near you while Jake could only look down with a deep frown, purposefully avoiding your gaze.

“What is the reason for these words, lovely girl? Of course he still loves you–”

“Let’s ask the chief himself; Jake, answer my question.”

He snorted humorlessly, almost in disbelief. “Why the– why would you ever ask that?”

You pulled away from Neytiri’s touch and took long steps his way, innerly grateful for him sitting down on a rock otherwise you wouldn’t have any access in grabbing his face and forcing him to meet your eyes. “You don’t look at me anymore. You don’t smile, or you do but it never reaches your eyes. Not when you’re with me, or Neytiri whether she admits it or not. Do you love me now? Do you love her? Why–”

“Jesus Christ, Y/N! Why would you ever, ever question this! I have loved, still love, and will always love you and Neytiri and my kids more than anyone and anything in this entire universe.” Yellow and slight neon green like eyes bored within your own, and you had no control of the way air completely left your lungs. But it did not whatsoever efface his constant behavior, or the emotions you carried. “Do those kids include the two that are growing inside me right now?”

He huffed, looking at Neytiri to find some sort of exit to this exhausting and daily question of yours, but she stayed quiet. If anything, she looked and waited for his response in the same way you did. “If these babies make you guys happy, then I’m more than fine with it. Then yes, I want you to have them. What you want, I want–”

“Jake.”

He continued without looking at you. “Neytiri, I do love you so much, and again, if this is what you both want then okay– “

“Ma Jake.”

“...you deserve this and I care–”

“For Eywa’s sake, Jake Sully, answer her question! You have already admitted this to me, now admit it to her! Enough with the lies, enough with the silence, enough picking your way out! Answer truthfully because she deserves the truth from you,”

“Do you want to have these babies?”

The light contours of his nose flared at Neytiri’s words but didn’t argue nor respond. No words, no heavy breaths, no sound besides the heart of Pandora’s forest. Nothing and you were growing antsy because of it, nothing and Neytiri hissed because of it. Until, finally, his lips parted and uttered one single word; “No.”

Neytiri’s ears hitched at the harsh jitter your heart created, and she wasted no time in getting beside you. You let her grab you, but you did not tear your eyes from him. “W-what?’

“No.” he said more firmly, brows pulled together and eyes drenched in remorse and anger. “No. No. No!”

The end of Neytiri’s braids lightly whipped against your skin as she glanced to look at him when he stood, her eyes equally as wide as your own from his tone of voice. “You don’t want our children?”

“I can suffice with the other two. And not if it means we’re losing you. Not like this.”

Your hold on Neytiri tightened and as did hers. “Ma Jake, we do not know if we will lose her because of this pregnancy–”

“Stop, Neytiri. Just stop, you’re pointing out my lies and here you are lying and trying to convince yourself. You damn heard Norm, you heard Dr. Mason – her heart can’t handle it! If she can’t handle one, how the hell do you think she can handle two?” The muscles of his neck strained tightly as he hissed these words, brows curling down. “Or what – losing her doesn’t matter to you, Neytiri? You rather choose two lifeless children over our girl–”

She abruptly stood to her height and within a second, her chest was pressed against his. “I never, ever said that and you know this! Do not assume what I feel, do not assume what I choose!”

“You and I both know what’s going on with her body, you as much as i can feel the way she’s slowly slipping away and you’re on her damn side–”

“This is not about choosing sides, Jake! This is about life, the life she is having that holds apart of us–”

“And what about her life!”

You all were silent, thick and heavy tears rolling down both yours and Neytiri’s cheeks, becoming one with the skin beneath your eyes. He, however, contained them. He couldn’t break down, not now. “Y/N, you’re not gonna say anything? Not fight, not agree, nothing?” You didn’t, because you had already come to the terms of you departing and making peace with it. You were upset, angry at him, at her, at yourself, at your very heart. “You were the one to bring this up that night, Jake. You were the one who encouraged this, you convinced me and Neytiri so don’t forget–”

He threw his arms in the air, exasperated and let out a strangled breath. “And I damn regret it! Every day I think about it, and wish I kept my mouth shut. We were fine, we were happy just us; you, Neytiri, the kids, me, our fortress. That was enough for me, our happiness.” His voice boomed once more, and never once had it been that way towards you or Neytiri. 

Never did he want to hurt them, that was something he always feared doing and yet, here they were. Perhaps he was a coward simply blaming it on his conscience, simply blaming it on his heart, uttering a truth that was already known as a lie but continued to speak it. He knew well he was to blame; but he wanted to contain the peace, his source of happiness, of protecting, of giving him a purpose and fortress.

You tried blinking away the blur of tears and looked at Neytiri, “Do….do you have regrets? Do you want this? Or are you lying like him–”

“Never have I once lied to you, ma Y/N.” she ushered herself to you, hands grabbing ahold of your cheeks. “I have been honest, always. I do not partake nor control this skxawng’s words…but,” she inhaled deeply, her lower lip pushing out and her ears flattening in hence of her sadness. “I am afraid. I-I do not want us to lose you…yet at the same time, I admire the way you have accepted this, and as hurting as it is…I want this for you, for us, these babies. I support you, no matter what.” Her grasp grew desperate, eyes having the rarity of plead she’ll only show him, only show you. You recognized the fear of losing her peace, but you knew her words were nothing but sincere, loving but you knew she too felt remorse. “Trust. Rutxe ( please ). You must trust me–”

“I do trust you, Neytiri.” Your touch soothed, cradling her jaw and stroked her azure flesh with a wobbly smile before it fell, both of you glancing at a crumbled looking Jake. “Are you unhappy now, Jake? Are you unhappy with us?” your tone of voice edged, and the assistance of Neytiri’s golden orbs with your broken sparkling ones sliced deep into his heart. 

The length of dark locs upon his head fell to his forehead and swayed over his heaving chest, “I’m unhappy with the way you’re hurting. And I know Neytiri is being the better one here, but I’m sure that she feels the exact same way I do when we see you hurting; I feel like a part of me dies.” He lifted his head, and your own heart churned at the dampness surfacing those eyes. “I don’t like what those two are doing to you, angel. I don’t like hearing Neytiri suffer in silence because of this…I don’t like the fact that you’ll leave our kids–”

“Jake…”

He moved closer until he was kneeling over the ground, and reached out to hold his girls, to provide you both that strength of protection, of stability within your fortress as he often did, and Neytiri let him, you let him. She let him run his fingers through her cascade of braids as he kissed her forehead. You let him rest the expanse of his hand over your back and pull you ever deeper into his warmth and he soon kissed both your drenched faces, and for the first time in a while, he let his tears fall, tainting both yours and Neytiri’s skin, because regardless of everything that has happened, you yearned for one another, for that heat he provided, that security he carried and become one with.

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

The large holographic images displayed the very hospital you met Jake in, and among the myriad of images was that one ward, the one you specifically met him in. Never did he think he’d see this place again, even though he’s not physically there. It made the former marine’s insides stir with all kinds of emotions, smiling every so briefly at recalling all those memories upon those walls. He’d fallen in love with you, given her the very first kiss beneath those stark lights. He mentally thanked Norm for saving these old but very functional technology; ones that were able to seep through the memory of one and project them right before your eyes, and Norm happened to let him ( mainly you, since you’re mostly responsible and reliable to take care of such thing–) take it within the forest, just to show Neytiri.

“Here’s where we met,” he cleared his throat, glancing at Neytiri, then at you before staring back at the image. “Where I found out about her crazy love for babies.”

Your lips curled at his awkward chuckle, and took a step forward and near the picture; small bodies of babies that you remember as clear as day right there, picked from yours and Jake’s memories. You stood between the two Na’vi figures who carried both your other babies, and internally laughed at how it was now your shoulder pressed against his forearm. He even smiled slightly and welcomed this contact, knowing that despite there really being nothing special about himself, he had embraced the fact that his warmth, his need for a light to radiance in his darkness called to you, the very same way with Neytiri as well.

Neytiri’s eyes brimmed and her tail softly lashed with wonder, Kiri’s pure gaze brimmed with the same emotion her mother carried as well. She’s heard the way they’ve met multiple times, she’s retained the lovely memory by heart and understood Jake’s reasoning for the way he spoke of his past, of his disabilities and your condition. Jake’s trepidation did not go without acknowledgement nor understanding, because she too feared, she too fell into great sadness with the thought of losing you. However, she had something you’ve been contemplating with, something Jake seemed to have forgotten to have in their Great Mother; faith in your heart. In your surviving, and perhaps she was in denial, perhaps she too, like Jake, wanted it to be a wrong belief, but even her own mother, the Tsahik could not correspond to these unknown outcomes.

So she couldn’t evict the hitch of a crestfallen smile when you grabbed ahold of both their hands, not tearing your eyes from the motions of the pictures; the little babies she recalled you saying were very tiny compared to the Neteyam and Kiri, and questioned without looking at either or: “You would put my own life above the ones growing inside of me, marine? And would you, Neytiri, rather me alive than the ones bound to live under the will of Eywa? Please, be truthful.”

Jake’s smile softened at both the nickname and kept his gaze on you and so did Neytiri. Mesmerization played a powerful vehemence within the three of you, always directed fairly with the other, both admiring the captivating beauty etched upon your frail complexion, and Neytiri now understood why he called you an angel, what was the purpose of an angel; you fulfilled the word, you gave it meaning.

“Without hesitation, I would.” He responded, and all you knew this response wasn’t one you entirely wished for, and her hand tightened around yours. “Under the will of Eywa, I would.” Never would you or Jake pull Neytiri from her trust in Eywa, you respected this. And all this holding back, the lying, it was tiring for the both of them, and Jake wanted to affirm his belief within both your minds that you both matter to him, that he cared in keeping you both safe, alive, but overall happy.

Your head bobbed softly at their words, the device around your body soon shutting off with your silent command. Jake found himself crouching down to the ground with Neteyam in his grasp, a move you once took as silly and pitiful for them both really, but now it didn’t matter. Not when he found himself drawn to you, reaching Neytiri’s other hand and motioning her to bring herself and Kiri down as well. “You both will choose me.”

“I will forever choose my fortress.”

Neytiri huffed out a breathy giggle as Kiri’s fingers brushed over the ends of her braids to the tip of her ear, and Jake along with you grinned softly at the sound. “And I choose my fortress too, Jake. And choosing my fortress means choosing to let these little ones live. I choose to add onto the foundation of my, our fortress.”

He watched as you peered down to your belly, he watched as Neytiri smiled warmly with her irises swarming with both affection and sadness, and he inhaled deeply as you spoke; “Y’hear that, my other babies? I choose to give life to you both…but I wish for you guys to forgive me because that may be the only thing i can give you,” Both Neteyam and Kiri had writhed their way out of Jake’s and Neytiri’s hold, both their little frames seated between the circle their parents had created. 

A watery chuckle spewed from your throat when their wide eyed stare pointed your way and crouched down in front of them, their little blue fingers spreading over your tear stained cheeks, “And I wish for you two, my brilliant Kiri and my warrior Neteyam, to forgive me too…” Your palm lifted to ruffle the growing strands upon your baby boy’s head while the other cradled the fullness of Kiri’s cheek. “But I hope you guys promise to take care of these two babies here, and that you grow to love them as much as I do, okay?”

A barrier of tears warped Neytiri’s eyes, chuckling when the two laid their little hands over your stomach and grinned widely. “Prrnen, sa’nu! Prrnen!” Jake’s touch against you firmed, his throat constricting from trying to contain his pleads, his cries for you to not go through with this. To stay, to watch your two kids already born, alive, and growing continue to grow, to learn, to live with you by their side. He didn’t say anything, only observing and grasping how meaningful this was to you, how his kids already accepted their future siblings, observing and accepting how and why Neytiri chose to agree with you, how she maintained her firm support for you; because she wanted you to believe that your heart was capable enough to do something grand;  seykxel txe’lan. And she wanted you to be happy and fulfilled with your heart. It was not hers nor his choice to make, and it was then that he begun to accept the pernicious reality that this fortress will lose a major part that interpreted it a fortress, that his life, Neytiri’s life, Neteyam and Kiri’s life will outlive your own. And he didn’t dare to speak it aloud, so he only watched and took this moment in.

“Will you forgive me, Tiri? Will you forgive me, Jake?” Their hearts tethered at the timidness of your voice.

Neytiri reached for you, long arms tangling around you as she pressed soft kisses across each part of your face, letting her tears mingle with the ones over your cheeks, “I do not need to forgive you for anything,  seykxel txe’lan. I desire what you desire,” her mouth fell over your forehead, “I choose whatever you choose, lovely girl.”

Jake then kissed you, pouring it all into that one kiss, fingers delicately but firmly grasping your flesh as he drank you in in this precise moment, not caring to hold back in front of his kids who had already seemed occupied with the unique nature surrounding them, and you could’ve sworn you heard a sob among his breaking stutter as he pulled away and let his forehead cover your own. “I choose you. I just choose you, my angel.”

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

Jake greatly detested coming back to the human outpost just for check-ups; your check-ups. Not that he detested knowing about your health, but he generally detested hospitals, doctors, anything that had to do with machines, the feedback, wires, tubes. He knew he was inexperienced in this field, but he, equally or more so Neytiri, despised these human machines more than anything. Which is why when the time finally came, they had Dr. Mason and Norm come to their Hometree, with of course your permission given this was your procedure, and assist the Tsahik, your mother-in-law to help with the preparation of your said labor.

Though he’d been a bit stubborn to this, you, Neytiri, Mo’at, Dr. Mason, and Norm had convinced him to agree. Neytiri too had been…thickly stubborn at allowing Dr. Mason in, she wanted you to partake in the natural birthing process of the Na’vi, but after hearing the precautions a pregnant human must take, let alone one with your condition and carrying twins, she reluctantly accepted this as long as she was present within the room.

“You are very calm, ma Jake. It is worrying.” Neytiri pointed out, and his pinned down ears flickered at the sound of his mate’s voice and eyes fell over the weak strain of your smile. He matched your expression and let his gaze focus on the interlace of Neytiri’s azure fingers delicately wrapped around your ringed ones, letting the sight stir his stomach and let his own hand rest over the both of yours. “I’m calm because you both are. But Mason and Norm aren’t here yet and it worries me that they and Mo’at–”

“Do not make her anxious, Jakesully,” His mother-in-law had interjected in a low tone and he turned to see her giving him a firm look as she prepared for the coming events. “They will be here in time.”

“Right, right, right. Yeah, sorry.” His head bobbed with each word, knees pressing into the ground. “Supposed to be a supporting and loving husband, not some commanding chief or marine, I know–” Neytiri’s lips pursed to contain her slight smile, and both stared down at you as a giggle bubbled from your chest. He, Jake, was enamored with the sight of them, of her, of you in this second, especially in this second given the circumstances. Your perseverance was admirable to both of them, and while Jake wished to be like you, he also wished to be like Neytiri, have more of her support and cooperativity.

He watched as you gave Neytiri a smirk, those gentle eyes illuminating as always and your voice dropped to a whisper. “Commanding chief, huh? And a commanding marine? Tiri, my love, that doesn’t sound bad now, does it?”

Your jesting statement caused Neytiri’s eyes to roll, yet their gold hue softly enlivened and warmed. “Srane, ma Y/N. It is an interesting idea, is it not, ma Jake?”

Once more; perseverance, support, cooperativity, commendable in his perspective. You for creating jokes at a time like this, Neytiri for going along with it in hopes to ease the tension accompanying them all, to ease the torment assisting their minds and unwind the wires of anxiety around their hearts. “I love yall so damn much.” he sighed out.

“You influence us, ma Jake. You are what you say, rubbing off on me.” She grinned at the way your head perked up and laid your other hand over his forearm, “Baby, that’s another good one! Wanna rub off on us, Jake, my protector?” He chuckled softly, and just when he was about to respond, a very late Norm and a very late doctor and what also seemed as two more scientist / doctors walked in with two other Na’vi males assisting on each side, just as guidance and precautions under Jake’s order, departing with a firm nod of his, and his lips portrayed a tight stroke with a puncture between his brows. Norm mouthed a ‘sorry’ while Dr. Mason greeted you all, including the Tsahik. 

“We only permitted the doctor and the other into our home,” Neytiri frowned, shoulders narrowing as she eyed the female who squirmed under her inspecting gaze. “Again, we need as much help as we can get in here,” Dr. Mason informed, settling down in front of you and put together the minor equipment she carried, every Na’vi present in your atmosphere grimacing at the sound they created.

“Look at you, round and ready to go,” Norm mused and you rolled your eyes at his remark but smiled nonetheless. You, well your belly was incredibly round, and incredibly large for its size to carry two babies. Then again, these babies may not be human to which is why your labor was to be taken with attentiveness and caution, not wanting to harm you or them, yet if needed, with your permission already, you’d already accepted the harm that would be delivered to you. “So…do we have any questions before we continue with this process?” 

Your hold on your wife’s hand tightened, your hold on his arm tightened and your face portrayed the subtle strokes of sadness and anguish. Both knew the meaning to this, and Neytiri’s lashes fluttered rapidly and softly spoke to you, reassuring and loving, while Jake chose to zone out for he did not want to comprehend it and let the Tsahik, Norm, the other docs, and Dr. Mason continued with your mates present.

It was when the beeping sounds of the machine spiked and blocked away his thinking and blinked him back to reality. It was Neytiri, her eyes livid and tormented as she stared at Dr. Mason and her mother, yelling in their native language while Mo’at deeply frowned and tried to respond with a firm voice. Shouts, frantic movements from the others. He wasted no time in launching to your side and grabbed ahold of your hand. 

He was too distressed, too agitated to comprehend the grasp of their Na’vi language in this case. “Someone tell me what the hell is going on! What is wrong with her— Neytiri!” If he weren’t so caught up in his booming octave, he would have noticed the flash of pain across your face. Neytiri, however, did, and stopped from helping her mother with this procedure and rushed to soothe you. “Ma Jake, mawey.” She hissed quietly, then let her palm fall over your jumble by chest. “ Ma seykxel txe’lan. Strong. Breathe. We are here…”

Jake’s ear flattened at the jitters of your heartbeat and whirled his head towards you. He let his own hand, quivering, laid over Neytiri’s and your eyes, those beautiful eyes, frantic and desperate gave them the notion to go into your breathing practices. “C’mon angel, I know, I know, baby. C’mon, jus’ breathe for us…”

All efforts were meaningless, hopeless, faithless and he was on the point of collapsing in a void while she tried grasping onto that hope, that faith for the three of you.

“Mo’at, the babies’ heart rate is lowering. Y/N’s heart is too fast right now and so is her blood pressure,” Dr. Mason’s lenses fogged up, the agony unclear to her eyes with a determined press of her lips. “We have to do a C-section. We have to cut one in order for both the babies to live.”

“We do not partake in such things—”

“Neytiri’s right, no—“ their protests were cut short with a rise of the Tsahik’s pointer finger, yellow orbs disappearing under closed eyelids for just a second before they reappeared. “If that is what it takes, that is what we must do.” Neytiri wanted to scream, to yell that this was not their way, but she bit her tongue for she respected her mother’s word, she respected the Great Mother’s will. 

“Jake, Neytiri, Norm, I’m going to need the three of you to step out—”

“My daughter is to stay.” Mo’at interjected and pointed her gaze at Neytiri. “If you are tsakarem, if you are to be Tsahik, you must stay.”

Your panicking eyes slightly eased at the knowledge of one of your mates being here, but you needed them both in this moment here, with you despite those words. Words that Jake and Neytiri despised, words that would rather go ignored than complied. They both promised, he promised he’d be there and yet here he was, outside the Tsahik’s hut, hurting and breaking his promise.

“Strong heart, angel. Use that strong heart, y’hear me?” were the final words he said, sharing a deep understanding with Neytiri’s irises before giving her hand a comforting squeeze before parting his way from his wives. 

He could simply surge himself in, with no one to stop him. He was Olo’eyktan, he was the People’s leader. Who were they to stop him? Sure, Norm was here, but his lanky strength was no match for Jake’s. But he knew you would not like this, you wouldn’t want him to act against his support and Neytiri wouldn’t approve especially, and it was not in his book to disappoint his girls once more. So he decided to set his nerve racketing behind on the nearest surface, and allowed his ability to feel, to hear his angel’s wonderful heartbeat try and soothe him, the hear his lovely Neytiri’s enhanced heart twine and support your own; if he couldn’t be near them, the very least he could have is the abnormal rhythm of your two joined heartbeats.

“Relax, Jake. She’s gonna be fine.” Norm, grunting as he settled beside his friend, reassured, and let his arm fall over dense shoulders as they both sat a good distance from where you resided in, and Jake couldn’t contain the shaking exhale that left his churning chest when his baby boy and girl ran their way into his arms; as if they felt his distress and let their father nuzzle himself into their little frames.

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

“It’s been over 24 fucking hours—” Jake’s eyes cautiously peered down at Neteyam who had his head resting over his shoulder, the damp feel of his saliva proving him to be asleep from the gentle bouncing motions Jake created. “— and they still haven’t said anything!”

Norm — having a curious Kiri who fiddled with the strands of his hair and odd human clothes in his arms — sighed in front of him because of course, Jake was not only impatient but overly dramatic at times. “First of all, it’s been at least over 60 minutes since. Second, stop being so antsy. She’d want you to be calm right now — Y/N’s strong.”

He rolled his eyes at his remark and didn’t care if Norm smirked slightly at his tactics. He only cared about you. “Just be patient—”

“I don’t care about damn patience! I want to know what’s happening with my wife!” His yell awoken the boy in his arms, causing him to groan and stir awake with a silent whimper while Kiri could only babble loudly — possibly angrily — at her father. “Shh…shh, Teyam. My bad, baby boy.” He crooned, patting his back and bounced him once more. “Daddy’s being a pain in the ass right now…”

“Jake, I don’t know what’s bound to happen but—”

His ears hitched, focused on a melody that he could not manage to detect and he strongly shushed Norm. “H-hol’ on….something’s wrong.”

“Jake, what’s going on—

“Quiet.” Fear clawed at his chest, and Norm frowned at the way Jake slowly strided forward. “I, uh, I can’t…I can’t hear—”

Neteyam’s head lifted and both men stared between the boy and Kiri as they looked at each other, their pointed ears creating the same motion Jake’s had done second ago, a quiet whimper leaving them both before they out of nowhere started to thrash, to cry, to whine in their hold. “Woah, woah, hey, Kiri, calm down—”

Neteyam writhed, he grunted, little fists pushing against his father’s chest as his nose scrunched up. “Sa’nu!” Sa’nu! Jake’s heart dropped to his stomach at the boy’s call for you. He pushed the boy into Norm’s arms and let his feet march him to the faint inhales you mustered, the weak thumps your heart created — yes, faint, yes, weak, but still existent enough for him to know you were alive. But now, he didn’t feel, he didn’t hear the combination he knew, he memorized. 

He ignored the cries from his children, he ignored the calls from his friend, he continued forward with a blurred vision without a care for the world around him. All he could hear now were the mournful cries that up to this day pitted him with aching guilt, the cries he was responsible of before; Neytiri’s cries

The woven curtains to the Tsahik’s tent were roughly pushed aside, and it startled the two other human unknown nor uncared for named doctors present in the room. He didn’t give them any care, not when his eyes panned over the spot you once laid on the fabric covered ground but now you rested in the desperate and softly swaying cradle of Neytiri’s arms, and he held back a whimper; at least he tried convincing himself you were resting. Tried convincing himself that Neytiri’s tears were all but sadness, that they were tears of happiness, of such proudness for what you had just done. No one pushed him out, no one stopped him, yet no one needed to because his feet, his body froze.

You looked as if you were in a peaceful slumber, yes. That’s what you were, simply sleeping, simply trying to catch your breath and process the immense strain you've experienced. That’s what he tried to cement in his mind, that’s what he tried to tell himself because no other option could be accepted.

Yet he and Neytiri had both seen, had both memorized the many occasions you’d fallen asleep in their warmth and he tightly held onto the indulgence of believing the definition of your state was sleep. He had mastered the structure of everyone’s heart within his fortress; and now there was a pure structure that had been torn from it, from existence.

Neytiri’s gaze lifted from your frame and collided with his own, those golden eyes immersing in tears and without his volition, he took 5 steps forward and looked back down at you. Motionless you were; drained of complexion yet body drenched with your own blood, devoid of life. Your heart was lifeless, your chest unmoved. No breath animated your being, and in the absence of ascent, there could be no descent. Though there was an ascent — the ascent of Neytiri’s wretched cries — and for that ascent came the descent — Jake’s descent. He had been unaware of his hard fall to the ground, right beside Neytiri, right where you were.

“Angel, baby, c’mon,” He whimpered, trying to block away the way Neytiri’s sobs tore him apart as he grabbed you from her hold, large arms carrying you, shaking palm grasping your washed out face, inspecting those features that remained angelic, that remained with a fading light he desperately tried to keep from seeping through his fingers. 

“Y/N, open those eyes for me, y-yeah? Those pretty eyes—”

“She…She is with Eywa now, ma Jake.” 

Months after holding back, after swallowing his pain and tears, those whispered, broken words erupted into a miserable yell of your name.

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

Jake’s conscience had been tormented with the many deaths he’d been responsible for. He carried that misfortune with him always, he had embraced that responsibility and let it continue to shadow him and he never pushed or numbed it away because he was deserving of it, to the point that if the time came for his own death, he’d more than gladly embrace it.

But the death he would much rather not embrace in this life, in any other life, was yours.

To which is why he strongly chose to let numbness to its work within his broken soul. Numbness as he remained without lifting a single finger, without releasing a ragged breath or tear, sitting a good distance outside the Hometree, letting Pandora’s nature blanket him with apathy.

It was better this way, he said inwardly, to not feel. To suffer in his own agony in silence for if he revealed it, he would destroy the little peace he thought that was residing in his fortress. It was odd, the way the forest was silent. No chirping, no creek, no breeze. Just silence, a silence he accepted and let it become one of his smallest comforts. 

It only lasted for a limit however, and he huffed out a sigh as the subtle to rapid little steps amongst the soil filled his ears before the ones they belonged to could come to view. “Daddy!”

A smile, forced and exhausted, strained the corners of his mouth as Kiri jolted into his arms. “Hey, babygirl…” 

“Prrnen! See prrnen!” He ignored her words by focusing his attention on her hair, lightly pulling on the braid fallen over her shoulder only for her to grumble at him.

A long azure figure, one he wanted nothing more than to avoid at this moment because he knew what she held, came to his eyesight; Neytiri. In her hand was Neteyam’s little one, the boy’s head fallen and gaze staring at the ground as they approached his father. Jake’s head tilted at this, noting the way his little ears were pinned back and a sniffle scrunched his pink nose.

“Neteyam.” The boy stayed quiet much to his dismay, and he frowned deeply.

“He has not been himself for the past days,” his mate, his wife, spoke up. He didn’t want to go on without acknowledging her, so his chin tilted to meet her golden hues — ardent and unreadable, but tinging the slightest of remorse. “You would know this if you paid attention to your son—”

“I’m not in the mood for this, Neytiri.” He knew he should have said that, he knew her words were truthful, but he only sighed, stood up before picking Kiri up and walked over to Neteyam. “Hey, ‘Teyam the mighty warrior…” the smallest of peers from the 1 in a half year old. Guilt panged his chest, knowing he’s well deserving of the little attention his son gave him.  “Want me to carry you?”

Nothing. Not until his little arms extended towards the air, a quiet ‘Srane’ leaving him. He now had both children in his arms and his cheek very slightly hoisted when they nestled into his shoulder, tightening their arms and legs around him.

Neytiri watched. She watched the way he interacted with them, she inspected the way his face softened when they provided him the comfort he needed in this moment, the way he inhaled deeply before staring into her eyes, and she knew and felt his grief. 

Grief was something not to mourn for long in their way of life. The Great Mother provided, created, nurtured, and she included taking in return. The birth of your children has provided for their fortress, and had been a blessing despite the taking Eywa had made — yet Jake could not see that. Jake could not accept it, accept them. He didn’t want to celebrate the twins’ birth, to which is why Mo’at and her had privately connected one of them to the Great Mother, unaware to him, he didn’t help create their songcords — he didn’t even spare them a glance from the moment they were in his presence. He didn’t even hear the name given, see what the pondering question everyone asked; if they were human, if they were Na’vi, if they had inherited your ability to breathe Pandora’s air, if they were healthy.

And it hurt Neytiri’s heart because she knew you wouldn’t want this, that you would be more than happy to celebrate their birth, to see their father meet, love and accept them. Hurt she was because he had thought he’s left Neytiri to do the mourning when she couldn’t even do it properly; she had her, their children to take care of.

When she caught onto the regret in his eyes and apology nearly falling from his lips, she saw how his gaze flickered to the squirming cooing sounds that came from the prrsmung wrapped over her chest, how Jake’s features hardening.

“You must meet—”

“Keep those things away from me.” He knew his harsh words sliced deep, and instead of feeling the gnawing guilt, he rather Neytiri felt the sliver of pain he wanted to avoid; he knew he was not being fair, and she knew this too yet didn’t say anything. “I’ll head back later. Leave ‘Teyam and Kiri with me. You go and do whatever it is you need.”

Neteyam huffed at his father’s words, as if understanding word for word and motioned to be put down. Reluctantly, Jake did, and he wasted no time in rushing towards his mama’s side, ignoring the look of surprise among Jake’s face. All Kiri did was tug harshly on her dad’s hair with a screech of his name but stayed in his hold.

And Neytiri said nothing, for Jake’s dagger of words had cut deep within Neytiri’s heart and she did not want to cause a scene in front of her children, so she simply nodded and turned to depart from him, leaving him with the only comfort of his little girl’s small embrace.

˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

Nights fell upon the mated pair with the same pattern — nights where Jake, despite his numbness, would still hold Neytiri to his chest in an unyielding grip with the only sounds being heard were quiet sobs — until that would be assisted with the wails of not only one but two infants, two he always dipped his head down and even shut his eyes to not spare a glance at them or the two cradles they laid in, and let Neytiri peel away from his embrace to check on them, followed by the babbled questions Neteyam and Kiri would make. 

Jake didn’t care about meeting them because they knew nothing of you. Sure, they came out of you, you cared for them when you held them in your womb, but they didn’t know who you were. Not how Neytiri did, not like how he did. You were theirs, their angel, their peace, and those two had gone and destroyed that peace no matter what his mate said. He didn’t understand why and how Neytiri could even look at them and hold them without the churn, the pain. Those two…things didn’t know you, they didn’t love you like they did. This was his and Neytiri’s loss and he almost had thought she didn’t care, but oh, how ridiculous and unfair that was on his part. He knew she mourned you, he knew she was just as destroyed as he had yet tried maintaining her ground for her — their children.

 Still, even then he found the babies’ cries unjustified.

But, to his dismay, there may have been a single thing those kids and Jake had in common; the sleepless nights. Wide awake he’d be while Neytiri would slumber against his chest, trying to drown in a dreamless sleep in hopes to ease her grief, and days carried out with his once well known bluntness and serious demeanor while attending to his duties as Clan Leader, his slight distraction would only be Kiri and Neteyam who, even though just little ones, seemed to have disagreed with his behavior to those siblings of theirs. He didn’t speak to Norm much, and conversations with Neytiri led to minor arguments that kept his mouth shut before he crossed a line. He considered and knew, just as he always felt, that everything he touched and surrounded him suffered. 

His little boy suffered. His little girl suffered. Neytiri, his wife, his mate, her unwavering love and balance she tried maintaining within this fortress, suffered. Those twins suffered. 

His chin was turnt to the sky and he swallowed thickly when he heard those cries soften into wondrous coos and whimpers, his eyelids falling shut to contain his tears. 

Tonight did not carry that repetitive pattern however. A good 30 minutes after Neytiri had emerged from their hammock, his movements started shifting out as well, his bare feet quietly hitting the ground, long legs slowly leading towards where Neytiri and little Neteyam and Kiri sleeping soundly on the ground near the two cradles, the cradles he, you, and her made together mere months ago. He stood a good distance away from the three — five of them, fingers tapping over the stripes and scars etched across the sides of his thighs.

“Sweet, beautiful girl. You poor child,” he heard Neytiri softly croon, “you only wanted to be with your brother…you have your sa’nu’s eyes — srane, you do.” He heard the break in her voice, the deep inhale following from her statement and frowned. 

A boy and girl, huh? 

He took another step forward, and it was then that he felt his heart drop at the sight of them; the boy was one of them — Na’vi, with a head full of dark and rebellious tendrils brushing over his forehead, bright round irises, but it was the little girl that shocked him the most. The little girl who was human — peculiar, neutral tones, and so utterly tiny as she was curled into the baby boy’s blue frame as his little hands so very lightly wrapped over her petite frame. Both were the same age, yet the size was clearly distinct and utterly astounding to him.

Jake shuddered when the little boy’s familiar eyes blinked at him, the way the little baby girl smiled faintly with the soft brush of Neytiri’s fingertip. He immediately thought how was it possible that she could breathe, how was she and that toddler size boy could’ve been in the same space within your stomach? How did he not squeeze that little girl in there with his normal Na’vi chunky size?

He didn’t move and stayed quiet for a long time until he sighed and knelt down beside Neytiri. “Hey.”

Her mouth lifted briefly but kept her gaze fixated among the babies, not uttering a word. His voice was rasped, his throat raw from the cries he’d swallow down, and before she could even feel sorrow for him she held her tongue and continued to softly speak to them in her language.

His mind was too muggled to understand right now, and she caught onto his shift of attitude with the way his eyes went round, the way a furrow pinched his brows as she watched him curiously interact with the babies.

“The human doctor had said it was impossible for both to have survived.” Neytiri muttered, and his ears flitted at her words. “But our Y/N was strong enough to hold them. To not let them die.” Her forehead creased then. “She said to keep them separated from each other. It could be too dangerous for her with the size of Lo’ak compared to her but they cry every time they are not together. L—”

“Lo’ak?” He questioned in wonder. Her lips pursed, “Lo’ak. A name Y/N loved very much. She adored the meaning of it…Freedom love.” 

He gave a small nod as his lips trembled into the smallest of smiles. Of course you’d like that. “A-and her?”

That is when Neytiri’s lips parted and he heard the way her heartbeat hesitated until it thumped its profound rhythm before she smiled brokenly. “Seyk’lan. The meaning of seykxel txe’lan  — Strong heart, because this little one right here, was very strong beside this big warrior.” She softly teased, fingers brushing over the boy, Lo’ak’s round little belly.

His chest tightened, and he felt overwhelmed at the new found knowledge of their names, of their meanings, and stared at them for a while. Jake planted his palms over his knees, his shoulders hunching as he turned to look at Neytiri, really look at her. The smooth royal contours of her face had been drenched stained with tears, those golden hues of her eyes flickered in a way that showed her struggle to keep their vibrance, and her lower lip fought hard to not tremble the way it always did when she was upset. Neytiri always said you had a strong heart and so did she when she was fighting to keep going for her kids, for you, for him.

 It was then that he welcomed the guilt to claw him inside, and he hesitated to reach out and provide her the comfort she so needed. Her fibers sizzled at his coming words, throat tightened.  “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let you go through with this alone. Shouldn’t let you shoulder these two by yourself and shouldn’t take it out on you — I just….I didn’t…” tears evaded him now, and his head fell to try and conceal them.

But Neytiri’s forefinger lifted his chin and gave him a slight smile and shook her head. “You mourn differently. know you need time. And I will give it to you, ma Jake. I was prepared for it…for our Y/N to depart from us and yet…” her shaking exhale caused him to reach for her, palm sliding to cradle the trembling angle of her jaw. “Eywa has reason for all of this. I trust, I believe …. But no amount of preparation or trust can push the hurt that comes with losing the ones you love. W-with Y/N. But we must remain strong, Jake.” She breathed out and rested a hand over his leg. “For Neteyam. For Kiri. For Lo’ak and Seyk’lan—”

“Our fortress will always be broken without her, Neytiri. The pain won’t ever leave, it won’t be the same. I-I don’t want to forget this pain, baby. It’s only fair that I keep feeling it for us.”

 “The pain does not have to leave because it never will, ma Jake. You do not mean and you will not be carrying this alone,” His forehead kissed hers, channeling a warming love and soothing he desperately and finally let himself crave.

“Those kids won’t mean the same to me…” her nose feathered over his lovingly, and a sad smile graced Neytiri’s lips as his shaky breath met her skin. “Neglecting them will not do you anything to make you feel better from losing her. Carrying that hurt alone will never grant you peace of mind.”

Light croons and babbles pulled Jake’s attention, his temple now brushed over Neytiri’s forehead as he craned his neck to the single handwoven cradle which both laid in, and he nearly smiled at how both Neteyam and Kiri had stirred in their sleep and hazily reached to touch the babies. They cuddled into each other, little Lo’ak’s body hunched over hers as if hugging her. “What if I can’t accept them? What if I can’t bring myself to take care of them? I can’t disappoint our angel like that.” He shook his head as he stared back at her.

“They want to know you, ma Jake. You are their father, and I’m certain they want to know about her from us.” Neytiri’s words made his ears pique, at how she said they want to know about you, at how they must learn about who you were to them, to their fortress. His gaze bore into hers, and his voice dropped to a whisper. “And we’ll do this together, right? You’ll help me — and I’ll help you with them. Y-yeah?”

She released a wet chuckle, his thumb stroking away the tear over her cheekbone. “We will help and love one another because we chose to. Our Y/N made a choice; to bore our two babies, and she accepted it because she knew we would care for them, we would give them a part in our fortress, Jake. We have a choice. One that is not too late to make; to love them. They have chosen us.” Jake’s chest tightened as he reminisced about the first encounter, one of the first words you ever said to him and he choked out a sad chuckle.

“And this is the easy part, ma Jake,” she softly told him while entwining their fingers together. “Because they are easy to love…look at them.”

He did, only to see the two were already staring back at him while their much tinier hands were in the mighty Neteyam and brilliant Kiri’s little palms. Little Lo’ak smiled and babbled. “He has your eyes, ma yawne.” He grinned at the boy and then turned to Seyk’lan, the girl cooed softly at him, at her father, her tiny hand barely curling around his pinky. 

“Prrnen! ‘Lan and Lo’ak, daddy!” Kiri squealed, and Jake could only let a choked up chuckle out. Emotions spiraled within his heart as he got a good look at them; at Seyk’lan’s pure little heart in beautiful sync with Lo’ak’s, at the way she harbored your sparkling eyes with a sliver of a golden hue, at the way he formed a smile in perfect balance of his, Neytiri’s and yours. Eyes and a smile he now knew why Neytiri had grown to love profoundly, why she was called out to the same way yours had, eyes and a smile he thought he had lost forever. Those babies carried parts of you that embodied your angelic soul and features, and it was then that he let himself break.

With the help of Neytiri, he reached for them both, the baby girl, his other baby girl, frail and tiny in the way that you said; almost the same size as his wide palms. And the boy, his other boy, whines and Jake chuckled tearily. “I gotcha, kid. Ain’t gonna separate you from your sister, don’t worry…”

He cradled them carefully against his chest, held Seyk’lan’s tiny form with a single hand lovingly and an arm enveloped Lo’ak to give them the privilege to still snuggle against one another. He let a sob pour out from his lips as he held his twins, as his other children, Neteyam and Kiri settled down between Neytiri and himself, carrying a gummy smile. Jake’s gaze met his wife’s, and he couldn’t help but chuckle because she had been right. You had been right; choosing to love these two glazed with your complexion didn’t come with difficulty, just as loving you came with no difficulty. This hadn’t been the equivalence of the fortress he had in mind at the start with his girls, but he accepted the changes bound to merge within it, just as it did in life.

— ˖°.𓆩♡𓆪 .°˖

[softantlers]

please share the main thesis of your lottie matthews gender dissertation

god, okay. so there's this book called "my race is my gender" that i always paw through when i see it in stores and it's a portrait book with essays. to be honest, i care less about the concept of the book (which seems -gestures- interesting) and more in the phrasing. *that notion* of "my race is my gender" is really important to my conception of lottie as continually becoming her gender at the same time as she moves into her race at the same time as both are obliterated (and liberated??) by the wilderness.

WOO BOY.

people will say the show gives us shit-all on lottie's race (and to some extent, they're right) and that the show codes her as functionally white. i don't really like this take because it presumes that someone mixed race with a white parent who is (we are assuming because the show doesn't explicitly tell us this) dissociated from their other parent's culture is necessarily living a white context. speaking from my own experience, that's not true. there are levels of dissociation i feel, but the in betweeness of it all isn't the same as being white. if anything, the in betweeness makes you feel like an alien, not able to fully slot either which way.

i actually don't have a problem with the perception that lottie may be dissociated from her mom's culture because i think that's VERY REAL and fascinating rep to see in a show like yellowjackets. some mixed race people with a white parent are raised with intention toward integration and some (like myself) are not and have to claw their culture back over the course of their lives (or not). it's just real! and so, lottie's upbringing with a white dad (who seems so fucking unlikely to support or even be interested in her mom's background, let's be honest) makes me think this is the scenario for her. at the same time, simone's decision to incorporate the koru tattoo for adult lottie makes me think it's important and humanizing to consider teen lottie as being in this journey space. something has happened between the timelines that gets lottie to a position where she has a more explicit marker of culture on her skin.

wrt teen lottie, she is trying to be... someone. she is trying to actualize herself in the wilderness. the combination of growing up mixed race (which i don't think we should try to remove from lottie's character just because the show isn't doing much with it explicitly) with an unspeakable (in the 90s) mental health condition + being in such a different class space as her peers makes her entirely unrelatable. i really think lottie is less of a popular rich girl than an alien disguised as a popular rich girl to others. maybe she gets away with being "weird" more because of the regard people have for her wealth, but it doesn't take away her isolation. lottie is an island. the scene where the maid hands her the loxapine bottle at an empty dining table speaks VOLUMES. her mother doesn't understand what it's like to be mixed white. her father sure as hell doesn't understand what it's like to be multigenerational mixed and māori. she's got no common ground, no peers, no nothing to see herself in.

but the wilderness... this is a place where lottie slots in. where she makes sense to people (if only temporarily) and possesses an influence that is wholly apart from her dad's. people like her for HER (who she is unmedicated and unfiltered, as problematic as that becomes)... until they don't... but the baseline affirmation in s2 keeps lottie going.

what i think is so interesting about lottie's connection to the wilderness is something that's kinda ignored within the fandom... it's that lottie, at first, tries to do the christian thing. she falls in with a white girl and gets affirmation from her that what she's experiencing has something to do with capital-G GOD. what i find so important about this dynamic is that lottie IS NOT tapped into God, and--and--AND she doesn't go on to pretend that she is!! lottie's tapped into something else... to me, there's something so understated but important in lottie's quiet decision not to accept the white western conception of God that's being directly handed to her on a platter... it's just... very very good. without even discussing why she doesn't, lottie simply... doesn't.

because lottie is feeling something ELSE, even if she never directly tells laura lee so. and i think it speaks A LOT that lottie doesn't go on to frame her connection to the wildrness in an explicitly christian context moving forward. to me, it's so natural for her not to that it doesn't require a passing thought. christianity just isn't what's happening here.

(here, i'm not trying to diminish lottie's relationship with laura lee, but it IS a relationship of misinterpretation. i mean, god, for me it's a lot like the following exchange wrt race:

"what are you?"

"oh... my mom is māori, cook islander, some chinese. my dad is white."

"really? you look like xyz!"

"...okay."

lottie is not SEEN for all of her. instead, a sliver of lottie is seen by laura lee, but tbh a sliver of lottie is all that's seen by anyone. she's an island.)

and yeah, so here is where things get dicey because we have to deal with the fact that the show is probably not intending the majority of the messages that it has sent with lottie wrt her being indigenous... disclaimer: i am not claiming the representation is good or thoughtful or ANYTHING in terms of her being māori (and i'm going to take a backseat to people who have the perspective to judge this better than me).

BUT i am suggesting that it is, at the minimum, interesting to think about lottie tapping into the natural world while all of the yellowjackets (including her) are forced out of their western bubble. it's interesting that lottie never frames the wilderness in exchanges or bloodlust until the other girls start to frame it that way themselves (as when gen says "two people dead in exchange for a break in the snow?" and lottie responds that this isn't how the wilderness works, it doesn't operate in exchanges, it listens to us...) the idea that the wilderness is something that responds to the corruption within it and that lottie is this sort of conduit for the girls who then begins to reflect back their corruption, even as she initially introduced the wilderness as something nurturing and listening... makes my brain buzz with messages about indigenous assimilation, appropriation, and scapegoating/villification. but like i said, i think this is something the show is presenting by accident without much intention, so... it's difficult to run with!

anyways, anyways, anyways. so gender. (i'm losing steam but bear with me.) a lot of people talk about lottie as a jesus figure in the wilderness. while the xtian of it all is meh to meee, it's still a compelling comparison. lottie becomes a kind of blank canvas in the wilderness. she feels very gender ambivalent to me. throughout s2, she wears pretty much the same clothes (sort of at odds with natalie who is actualizing her gender/personhood through clothes despite the wilderness). and same with s3. she seems to be wearing whatever the hell is around, or just wearing laura lee's dress. the only thing that seems more intentional about lottie is her pink docs (which i've written about as a sliver of her personhood peeking through before). but yeah, there is a jesus vibe. lottie is equal parts gentle (with akilah) and she is jibing (with tai). she is affectionate and she is forgiving. she is thoughtful and she is distant. she's really fucking homoerotic. she's tortured. sure, it gives jesus.

but i think that it also gives wilderness. the wilderness becomes lottie's whole personhood. it becomes her gender. the gender ambivalence feels like part of this transmutation. she's losing who she was before and on a journey toward something different. she's all she's ever been really, in between, in between races, in between periods of lucidity and delusion, but it's different now because she feels like she's *on to something*. she'll give herself over for it...

i think lottie surrendering her personhood to the wilderness is simply everything about her character. she, more than most of the girls, is never allowed to be certain. not of her race, not of her own reality, not of any of her identities... but the wilderness is one of the first things that feels certain to her. to be honest, i relate a lot to this drive to sort of absolve your ambiguities. take away the pain and the clash that makes me this too complicated person, this too much person, and deliver me into something else, something that clicks. the wilderness, unlike either sides of her race, unlike the social dynamics around her gender, unlike the regulation on her mental health, is hers. (does that make sense? it's hard to put into words, but dammit! i get it. this is mine, this is who i am, i want it to *take me*. oh, lottie.)

so in the adult timeline, it's interesting because we have a lottie who is elegant and feminine. a lottie who has the koru tattoo. she's done some growing but growing isn't without pain. one thing about being mixed is that you don't get affirmation that you belong from others. you have to try to justify yourself as legitimate or turn away from trying. it is lifelong and continuous! in the adult timeline, it seems that lottie is trying. and trying hurts!! i have to wonder what it was like living with her mom after her parents divorced and if that proximity to her own mother impacted the gender she leans into in the adult timeline. maybe this also relates back to the koru tattoo-- lottie's efforts to get closer and perhaps succeeding!

but then the wilderness comes back and we see lottie lose herself again. god, i just have to keep saying it's so relatable. working toward a gender, working toward belonging within your race-- it fucking sucks. it hurts. you get pushed away, you get pushed around. not to mention the mental health of it all, which i don't want to circumvent by just addressing gender/race. idk everything inside her is meshed up and connected. she's always been a character that's drowning.

even on the compound, lottie isn't really seen. it's an image. it's a role. is it her? who knows?? but she is trying, and for fuck's sake can everyone just see that she's trying??? (who the hell is lottie matthews indeed)

but yeah, i think the wilderness coming back offers a sort of release from the energy of navigating it all. "here i am again. i can take you and make it all stop if you let me." here, let me just say: i'm not idealizing the wilderness at all-- i don't think it's good for lottie. but i do think it makes sense as a maladjusted desire to become something that is HER OWN, rather than trying to fit in boxes that sometimes strangle her (even if she might find what she needs in the struggle). what i'm getting at is that lottie's gender... lottie's race... lottie's mental health... it's this battle, and i think it's why the wilderness appeals to her. and i think it's why we have such interesting swings pre-, post-, and during the wilderness wrt gender.

and idk-- this was long as FUCK, and i am not saying my interpretation of lottie is correct. it's influenced a lot by my perspective, and i'm sure i'm missing layers of her (like everyone will since no one is precisely her) but i do think it's a humanizing take on her relationship with the wilderness, race, and gender. and idk she as a character means a lot to me because of it!

[dreamscapesofblue]

Dreamscapesofblue's Kinktober 2023

"Wait for me in bed without panties when I come back."

↠ summary - Wriothesley smut, Modern Au, as your college boyfriend. After spending one month away at an internship, he sends you a text to ask you to prepare for his return - without panties.

↠ characters - Wriothesley x fem!reader

↠ cw: mndi - 18+ smut, fluffy smut, fingering, somnophillia with consent, dirty talk. Brief mention of mental health struggles (no condition named), Wrio as your anchor in your mental health journey, reader works hard to be strong while he is away. 1.15k words.

Wait for me in bed without panties when I come back

Your heart thuds in excitement. It’s been a month since you have seen Wrio. Wrio had been caught up in a one month internship in a different state 4 hours away, and while both of you have no qualms with driving to meet each other, it had also been a busy season for you as you have been stuck in college trying to finish up your dissertation and final exams. 

This frustratingly stressful month without your boyfriend have made you miss his light hearted and comfortable presence. It didn’t help that you have been so used to him as your anchor through tough times. As someone who had mental health struggles, stressful times were hard and Wrio had always been there to ground you when the going gets tough. Although both of you try to make up for each other’s missing presence by being on the phone with each other almost all day, leaving FaceTime on the laptop running as you guys silently went about your daily activities, it was still different. Knowing that it was not an easy decision for him to decide to be away for a month, you consciously tried to appear the brightest and best you could to prevent him from worrying. 

After all, Wrio had originally wanted to reject this internship as he did not want to be physically away at your busiest time in University for a month. Wrio came to know of your story shortly after becoming your boyfriend and had been strongly protective and supportive of you ever since. At first, he was your ultimate crutch and saving grace in the early part of your recovery journey. Although you had gotten better, Wrio never changed in his staunch protectiveness over you and was very hesitant in leaving you alone. But you had spent 3 months conscientiously persuading, showing and promising him that you would be fine since you have been doing mental and physical preparations to cope. You shared that while you love his selfless support towards you, you needed to learn to stand on your own in order to become fully healthy again and become a better partner for him. Over the 3 months, he had watched your strong efforts in working even harder through therapy, always sharing and discussing on how you planned to improve your coping strategies. He watched how you’ve worked so hard to grow stronger for both of you by the days and acknowledged that his insistence to always be by your side would ultimately do you more bad than good. With your assurance that all will be fine since you guys would keep in contact everyday, he finally decides that not going would be letting you down and not respecting your efforts. 

Hearing his sweet voice through the speaker was different. No matter how close you tried to place the speaker to your ears, it would never reverberate through your body as his warm body affectionately snuggled you with his calming heart beats. 

But all of that suffering was finally coming to an end. You were feeling extremely proud of how far you have come on your own and having coped through this intense period without Wrio was testament to your growing strength. Right now, all that was on your mind was to receive your long awaited reward - to finally be in wrio’s arms again. 

So imagine the almost religious excitement you had while counting down towards the day Wrio would return to your shared apartment. On the day of your last written examination, he had lovingly sent you a beautiful morning message of encouragement - Wait for me in bed without panties when I come back tomorrow. 

You snuggle in bed and wished that it was already tomorrow’s night right now. You grabbed a little chibi sized doll that looked like a mini Wrio and hugged it to your chest.

I’m going to finally see you tomorrow. 

Slowly, you drift off to sleep. 

— 

Wrio enters the room silently. His icy blue eyes almost seem to be glowing in the dark, his usually sharp eye lines softening into an uncharacteristic gentleness when he trained his sight on your figure.

He sees your figure lying there wrapped in a blanket. He smirks in anticipation at the prospect of finally unwrapping his long awaited present. He slowly climbs up the bed and peels the blanket of you. His eyes darken in dizzying thirst as his starved body starts anticipating your soft body.

His cold and callused fingers slip under your nightgown, deliriously taking his time trailing your smooth jade thighs before he slowly reaches the apex. To his surprise, he reaches another soft covering that was still wet to the touch. Even though it wasn’t the surprise his was expecting, his body begins to heat up even more rapidly as he felt his crotch tighten painfully in excitement as he pictured you sprawled out on the bed; your sweet fingers trying to desperately please your aching clit that missed the touch of its true owner, your beautiful round breasts trembling under the moonlight as you pant and moan his name. 

He gulps another breath to restrain himself from tearing your nightgown apart immediately. Instead, he lines his chest to your back, reaches his hands from your waist to your pussy and starts rubbing your clothed clit. 

Just under a few of his masterful strokes, the sleeping bud began to bloom and harden in recognition of its master, trying to peek through the panties to directly meet his touch. 

Wrio feels your body start to pulse in pleasure as you subconsciously whine in dripping need, your cry urgent and needy, like a cat in heat mewling for salvation. Your twitching body rubs against wrio’s own clothed cock as he began kissing your neck. 

His familiar warmth coupled with the overwhelming sensations finally starts to rouse you awake. You blearily blink your lidded eyes as you try to orientate your mind and distinguish whether your brain is creating a dream to comfort your lonely mind. Just as you try to turn your head, Wrio moves forward and nibbles your ear. 

“Awake, sweetheart? Did I not tell you to wait for me without panties?”

As Wrio speaks, his uses one finger to dig beneath your panties and slowly glides over your dripping hole. 

“Hmm… perhaps you didn’t miss me as much to have forgotten about it. On the other hand, this one seems to miss me much more.” 

Wrio dips two fingers in your nectar, before clenching your rosy bud in between them, rubbing and pinching your love juice all over it as if trying to give it a bath.

Your body trembles harder in lust and pure delight as it registers that it was not a dream. 

“Wrio… you said you were coming back on 28th… I thought…I thought you were only coming back at night since you told me to wait in bed…” 

You pant in difficulty between breaths as wrio began fingering your pussy. 

“Ah, that’s my fault.” 

He suddenly stops his hand and you immediately turn more out of fear of disappointing him than reacting to the loss of his touch. When he finds your teary eyes face to face to his, he gently cups your cheeks in his warm palms and kisses your watery lashes.

“It is my fault for not elaborating, sweetheart. When I said to wait for me in bed without panties when I come back, it was to rid you of the hassle of wearing them when I know that it will be off the whole day soon. So sweetheart, while I might have actually preferred the unexpected surprise of finding you still wearing them with leftover traces of your desire for me, you are still not going to be able to wear them for the whole of today, or maybe even the whole of the upcoming week. “

Part 2 coming up soon!