#dissociative raph

[fandsart]

Dissociative Raph stuff

Part two >>

[thatkoiboi]

//WARNING: meltdown, dissociation, spiraling//

I'm proud of you and all your accomplishments! Everything will be okay <3

[fandsart]

GASP another opportunity to talk about system Raph?? Don't mind if I do

So I'd have to rewatch a bunch of episodes and the wiki doesn't list Mind Raph's episodes fsr, but from what I remember Mind Raph doesn't really disagree with Raph all that often. He's mostly a giver of advice and Raph generally listens to him. I assume this anon is attributing the alter from the Pizza Puffs episode to Mind Ralph but I'm pretty sure this is a separate one entirely. I also don't think that this is the only time we see him.

I'm going to be referring to these two as Raph A and Raph B for the sake of simplicity, with Raph A being the one to display his protective nature through nurturing and with Raph B displaying it in a sort of tough love approach in hoping he can help his brothers be prepared for something in the case the system can't be present.

This ties in really interestingly both with savage Raph and with Mind Raph grasping the mind melding ability before it's something that's even presented as something that they can do, being able to slide under the radar as "this is the advice you already know Raph would give you, it's just manifesting in your mind." Not only is it common for alters to be more skilled in some areas than other alters, it's totally expected, especially when a skill is necessary for safety reasons. In this case, his ability to help his brothers from a distance. Interesting how Mind Ralph is more present and kind of stretched thin in the Hidden City episode than usual, when Raph goes on a solo adventure. Interesting his Red Angel of Preventing Harm persona is one that we only ever see him put on during a solo stake out. I imagine he's co-con in those moments

You know, situations where he's not "alone" and/or "lost" entirely, but is without his family and could use someone to lean on a little bit

Ok, back to Raph A and B. I think Raph A probably fronts more often, but I do think we get a decent of screen time for both of them. It's debatable whether they can be considered co-hosts? I've heard co-hosting be explained as alters who host exactly the same amount, but I have to imagine that's an exaggeration. Idk, I have autism

I don't think these are the same Raphs

And to be clear, I don't believe one to be "The angry one" and the other to be "The sweet one." They're both angry in these scenes, and justifiably. I'm using these scenes in particular to address the way they've both dealt with similar conflicts. One of them is just more afraid to hurt the subject of his anger. It's important to note that the subject of his anger is different between these scenes and that's going to change some things. Leo's often intentionally annoying and isn't as sensitive as Donnie, but also, he's not consistent about this with Donnie either.

"if you don't cut it out with your middle child nonsense-"

I had my system friend proof read this and they felt it was important to insert this here: A lot of people these days are aware that alters develop for specific purposes, their role, and it might immediately strike someone as hypocritical if "Raph B" is afraid of the others not being able to defend themselves and that's where his anger stems from, for him to get angry at them in circumstances unrelated. Where his anger does not stem from something related to their safety.

A lot of media has gotten better at portraying DID, but a common thing I see them do is present the roles that the alters play out as incredibly conscious. Living exclusively for the sake of their role, while really, part of DID being a covert disorder is that they will develop a personality that makes that role possible. The personality might have been built off a certain need, but it will be more encompassing.

If his goal is to help prepare his brothers to be able to protect themselves, which would be motivated by fear, if that leaves him expressing his anger more often, that will simply be a pattern of behavior, and will impact the rest of his personality. He may fear holding back, that they might not be prepared for someone bigger than they are to not hold back in the future. Wants them to know how to handle that if the time comes. That isn't going to present consciously any more than it would a singlet with the same fears. The same way he's easily read in the movie.

Also I really don't want people to think that just because he may be afraid of coddling them does not mean you can expect to narrow his scenes down based on whether he is visibly angry or not. You pointed out he was angry in the scene where he called Donnie, but I do think it's important to stress that if he's not expressing anger at them, it doesn't necessarily indicate that this isn't Raph B, if we're operating under these distinctions.

I think that while I refer to them as cohosting, Raph B is probably fronting close to a third of the time at the start of the show, and by the end of the show is around close to half the time.

Then Leo becomes leader and by the time of the movie, Raph B is hosting often enough to fully be considered "the host" and not "one of the hosts." I heard someone say that it didn't make sense for Raph to suddenly break free from the Kraang when he did, but that it works narratively so they weren't going to critique it or something like that. But under this understanding, Leo may have drawn forward Raph A, the Raph that is afraid of them getting hurt, of his own anger hurting them. As opposed to the Raph who had been afraid they would never learn to protect themselves. The one who wanted to push them to be better, who I'm sure wasn't exactly thrilled to be attacking them, but who might not have been as equipped to fight these impulses the kraang were feeding him, since he never learned to fight his own, since his role was to embrace that.

Now I do want to say that I'm not going to say anyone is wrong for not adopting my interpretation that there are two (as Mind Raph once put it) "Real Raphs" (don't actually think about alters like this ftr) I understand that can be hard to contend with and while I have provided a level of evidence, there's a strong wall of plausible deniability that keeps me from claiming that it's basically canon (though I will argue that his plurality is basically canon). But I think that plausible deniability adds to this as a headcanon. I mean, talking to my system friend about it and how easily dismissive people are of obvious symptoms, how prone people are to falling on plausible deniability, to the point of not even stopping to think about it

It's possible that after the incident with Shredder, Raph became less coddling, since the second instance I've scrounged up of him being mad at Donnie happened significantly later in the series than either of the first two, and it's possible that he allowed himself to be more mad at Leo because he was being intentionally annoying. And that's all the plausible deniability for if we're actively thinking about it. Sometimes people are just kind of contradictory or hypocritical, we don't tend to linger on it too much. He just has a lot of inner conflict, he just has a bad memory (as stated by Donnie in Clothes Don't Make the Turtle), he's just indecisive (as established in Down with the Sickness), he just talks in third person sometimes, he just occasionally goes into past tense narration in his head. It's very easy to not think about these things, because individually, they aren't that notable. Just character quirks. That's part of DID being what's referred to as a "covert disorder"

Raph from ROTTMNT is canonically plural.

In the episode “Man vs Sewer” his is shown to have a trigger related to being alone. When he is left alone in the episode he becomes “Savage”. He cannot recognize his brothers until the main Raph is triggered into front.

In another episode he speaks to “Mind Raph”. They are shown to have different personalities and constantly argue over how to help their brothers.

.

[bagels-and-cream-cheese333]

you need to move on from what happened to you.

[manyunhappygreenies]

Be prepared to see what you'd rather not be.

she/her for Leo

Next.

[zinzabee]

Happy two year anniversary of the release of the Rise of the TMNT movie. To celebrate, here's my interpretation of what Raph experienced before and during his time Krangified.

Some personal notes below the cut.

During the time the movie first premiered on Netflix, I was going through one of the worst periods of my life, and began to experience extreme dissociative episodes that would leave me in an extremely vulnerable physical state. I already related heavily to Raph after watching the TV show, but seeing what happened to him in the movie hit me on a much more closer and personal level. It took me two years to fully complete this comic, because working on it made me think back to these intense and painful memories, and that was a struggle for a while. Only recently, within the last couple months, has my situation bettered enough for me to work on it without being too uncomfortable. 

This is me putting my raw, firsthand experiences onto paper, because I want to make peace with my past in order to move forward. Raph's victory in overcoming the Krang's control is, in my eyes, the same as my victory in surviving those intense dissociative episodes. This is a reflection of my personal struggle, meant to help me attain a very specific closure. I hope that perhaps someone else who is suffering, or who has suffered similarly, will see this and know there is hope. Our experiences may not be exactly the same, but I want you to know that you are not alone. 

Lastly, I would like to thank every individual person who worked on bringing this show to life, from first conception to the movie's premier. Rise has been a source of light in my life that I never could have imagined. From the friends I've made, to the art I've created, to the fits of laughter and the tears I shed as I sat through every episode over and over again. It wouldn't be possible without any of you, so thank you for being a part of it. No matter how big or small a role, I am eternally grateful to you. 💚

[liya4kar]

Double Vision

AU Masterpost

So I might have forgotten to say it, but in this AU, time doesn't just stop after 2003 Donny, 2012 Mikey, and Rise Raph get mentally linked. After getting their mental connection, they continue to live their lives and the adventures that come in the episodes.

So while Raph does get a bit of rest after the movie, 2003 Donny follows the 2003 third season, and 2012 Mikey jumps straight into the 2012 fourth season.

And what happens during those seasons I wonder-

[qoldenskies]

Is the lamp incident more traumatic than the docks to Donnie?

i mean despite both incidents being violent i'd say they're too drastically different to properly compare, but i kind of started it by saying the ch11 is Up There, so im gonna go with a reluctant yes.

and i'd mostly say that because the whole thing in the hallway is up there is something insanely traumatic too, and he woke up from that resurfacing memory, immediately broke something, and in a daze believed they were going to HURT him for it. and then they started screaming and pounding on the door, and raph broke it down (there are several reasons that would absolutely terrify him to see), and they held him down as he was bleeding out and begging for them to stop. he actually remembers it pretty clearly. it was just as horrible for him as it was for everyone else.

the moment on the docks was very brief, enough for him to be able to get back up and continue to keep fighting. in the moment he was only shaken and winded, it only set in afterwards how close he was to death as he looked back on it. it was so big to him because it was the first time he really confronted this fear head-on (well, it was mentioned in CL that he had existential terror very young, he didn't handle it well when he realized he was mortal cause a lot of people have that moment when we're kids. but the docks makes him confront how that relates to crime-fighting and the perpetual danger they're in now. it made it all feel so real) it influences a lot of how he acts in CL because of his shame for being traumatized-- it's more about the realization of the danger he was in overall, and how fragile his life actually was, not a particular fear of the shredder or belief he was going to be hurt exactly like that again.

at least in the whole three day fight, he knew he had his brothers to lean on. it was terrifying but he knew he had people in his corner that could defend him when he couldn't defend himself-- even when he had passing doubts (bpd moment, theyre inevitable) it was easy to rationalize it away. but when it comes to almost everything that happens in cc? he was alone. and even if he wasnt, and they were trying to help, he barely processed it. and when everything with the lamp happened he only thought they were breaking down his door to kill him.

[fandsart]

More dissociative Raph

[the-skybrary]

A short poem about being an introject/fictive based alter

[tmnt-again]

TMNT Again- Part Two!

Traumatized turtles? In my TMNT iteration? More likely than you think

[riverthebooknerd]

"we need more DID representation!" you couldn't even handle rottmnt raph

[rottmnt-brainrot-hours]

An old Raph POV Man vs Sewer edit- somehow I’ve never seen this idea done? It’s implied he doesn’t really remember wrecking the tunnel, possibly not even his panicking, so I snipped that part out. The destruction’s especially jarring without context.

[bulbabutt]

giving your own iteration of the ninja turtles a mental illness is fun but watch out! you might be self diagnosing!

[pumpkinpenguin]

i got the official diagnosis about a year after i started seeing a psychiatrist lmao

also ms paint is so fun idk why i don't use it more often

[fandsart]

This is an unlikely scenario, but what about one of Raph's alters managing to pick up Japanese early on