#examples of meltdowns

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Reasons I Had a Meltdown

Neurodivergent_lou

[greenbloodedskink]

A message and a warning from a contained city.

[icethinggigachad]

Stan and Ford and the Different Flavors of Autistic-ness

Ford has that Former Gifted Child thing where his inflated arrogance comes from a place of having to prove himself, but also yeas hes neurodivergent.

(Bugs under a rock. They are so so squishy.)

The way Ford thinks reminds me of Aspie Supremacy in a way.

[Aspie supremacy describes a phenomenon where people who were dx/still identify with the term "aspergers" see themselves as being superior to non-autistics (as well as "other" autistics) where people who have (visibly) lower support needs are "acceptable" enough vs other autistic people who need more support. Of course this is complicated!]

(More thoughts under this cut)

In a less extreme way, you could compare Ford-whose autism doesnt give him the learning disabilities his brother probably does. Autism can be comorbid with many learning disabilities.

They are both autistic but when it comes to school one of them needs more than the other.

Even as Ford doesn't have academic struggles, he clearly struggles socially. He struggles caring for himself, doing basic self care, etc.

Theres a reason we are moving away from "aspergers" and "low and high functioning" because the reality of being autistic is theres lots of areas where someone can need little or no support whereas in another they may have Very high support needs.

Being a nerd might have actually saved him socially in that way since when you are dismissed as a nerdy type, you are kind of expected to be "weird or eccentric" because Thats Just How Smart People Are, and it saved him from having to mask so hard. His natural way of being jibed with a stereotype.

But Stan didnt have that so he had to mask a lot more heavily. A likely reason he was actually less popular than Ford was among their peers. Because Ford met stereotypes and he didnt.

That specific terminology didnt exist yet but I think it could apply to him.

He would see traits he has and think they are Abilities and ways of thinking and that might make him feel a sense of superiority over others. Because thats how he built up his Worth after being ostracized.

They likely didnt have the words for these things: first of all special education didnt exist, awareness about autism and disabilities wasnt so common.

Ford and stan 100% have no idea they are autistic but they feel the experience without the words to describe it.

But i think like. You know, labels like "aspie supremacy" and "former gifted kid syndrome" and also "autism" in general exist they describe the phenomenon that was already There. We just have a term describing it now.

Even now there is a divide between autistic experiences where some autistic people are praised and seen as "gifted" and "good" autistics (Ford in this case) while others are the "bad" autistics (Stan in this example) who are seen as "defiant" and are punished. And also you can be in both situations at different times (I was.)

[marimbles]

someone over the age of 30 tell me it’s gonna be ok

[anghraine]

I probably won't have time to write on Wednesday, though I'm very much hoping I manage to keep up my every-day-of-the-month writing streak despite the funeral. Anyway, just in case, I wrote a bit extra for the f/f K/S AU for what would have been this WIP Wednesday—this is about half of it, set shortly after "That Which Survives":

Throughout the hours of separation and doubt, S’paak had not felt as if Jess were dead. An embarrassingly superstitious, irrational part of her was convinced that she would feel it, somehow, if Jessica Kirk were somehow snuffed out of the universe—but such feelings did not constitute data.  So S’paak could only fear the worst and do little to prevent it. She found herself coldly lashing out at those around her, unprovoked, with anger and dread eating at her in a way she had not experienced even on the other occasions when she had greater cause to fear death. S’paak knew very well that today, she had not been merely logical as acting captain in a way the human crew refused to understand, but unfair. Still, she had retained control over herself and the Enterprise, even as her body ached with the wild emotions pervading every part of it, humming, twitching under her skin, setting her teeth on edge. Pain is of the mind, she reminded herself, tapping her fingers on the captain’s console. Pain is of the mind. Pain— The sensations had vanished without warning when she beamed down and saw Jess at last. Now, the visceral discomfort of the day lingered only in S’paak’s distaste at the memory. Even considering the circumstances, even considering the depth of her feeling for Jess, it struck her as strange, an experience she hoped never to repeat. Several hours after her shift ended, S’paak returned to her quarters, welcoming the chance to settle her mind in silence and isolation. Instead, she heard the captain speaking through the wall between their quarters—projecting loud enough for her voice to reach S’paak’s sensitive ears, but muffled enough by the bulkheads for the words to remain indistinct, though she recognized the steady, collected, unhesitating intonation. Kirk must be recording a log of either the mission or her personal observations. S’paak turned away, but knew herself well enough to guess she would find more peace in speaking to Kirk than contemplating what she already knew. It sounded as if the captain had only just begun her log, so now would be the best time for an interruption, anyway. Sure enough, Jess readily broke off when S’paak requested entry, and her mouth was already curving into a smile as S’paak entered. “Captain, I apologize for interrupting you,” S’paak said insincerely.

Jess’s mouth twitched wider. “We both know I’m supposed to be off-duty. Bones would have my head if he knew I was still working.” 

S’paak lifted a brow. They both knew that she had the right and authority to inform him of Jess’s habits, but equally, that she was not such a hypocrite as to do so without better reason than his annoyance.

“I doubt he would have much use for your head, captain,” said S’paak.

Jess laughed outright, and S’paak’s mind filled with a sudden, ephemeral image of the captain’s head hanging from a wall between ceremonial weaponry, like some Terran boar. It would have been horrifying if it weren’t quite so absurd.

“No, I’m guessing not,” Jess said. “Maybe he’d pickle my brain for research, who knows? But you haven’t told me much about what was going on up here. Just how far away did you end up?”

S’paak dutifully reported what little there was to report on her end, and admitted that she had only had time to read Sulu’s account of what exactly had happened on the surface.

“Well, I was just getting around to mine,” said Jess. “It’ll be a bit delayed, but I wanted everything clear in my head before I compile the whole report, especially considering A’mato’s death.” Her mouth tightened.

S’paak had heard about that much from Sulu’s report. She nodded, intensely aware of how poorly Jess accepted most casualties, especially among those outside Security. The away team had been in no position to save him, nor any of the others who had died at Losira’s touch—it was no one’s fault, particularly. Not even the Losira replicas themselves could be accurately blamed. There was nothing to be done, except the usual.

She didn’t know if Jess had written the condolences yet, and normally, would have tried to find out, calibrating her concern for her welfare to the exact demands on the captain’s fortitude. But something else from Sulu’s report had struck S’paak as important, and yet, she didn’t quite know what it was, or why it tugged at her attention.

“That is reasonable,” said S’paak. “I understand that the team took exhaustive readings, as well, though the local flora was inedible.”

Jess sat back down at her desk, gesturing at the nearest chair. 

“I don’t imagine the readings will figure all that largely in my own report, though no doubt Bones will have plenty to say,” she said as S’paak settled into the chair, the one Jess herself usually sat in during their chess matches. The board was packed on a shelf rather than set out, and S’paak did not intend to suggest a game, preferring to keep her attention focused for now.

Something had happened today, something she should have observed, or had observed, but had not yet assigned to the correct framework and fully recognized. S’paak almost frowned at the smooth surface of the table.

“That is not an extraordinary occurrence,” she remarked.

She expected a short huff of laughter, a wry aside, something. But Jess had fallen unusually silent.

“We could have starved to death down there,” she said, almost carelessly. “Quite a logical concern, I’m sure you’ll agree. We would have died even if the Losiras hadn’t gotten to us, without the Enterprise coming back for us. That will certainly make it into my report.”

[spinebuster]

you guys i’m so close to giving up twitter finally i can feel it

[liam-summers]

I’m sorry but there’s nothing more insufferable than people who like btvs season 6. They make it their whole personality and act like you’ve committed a crime against humanity if you dare criticize it. It’s always “It’s so mature and complex, only academics get it.” Or my favourite, “yOu dOn’T gEt it bEcaUSe yOu’vE nEVeR BeEn dEPreSsEd!”

No babe, maybe you’re just over identifying with a season of fictional TV because you’re emotionally stunted and need to go outside and touch some grass.

[the-casbah-way]

people genuinely do seem to find it impossible to centre disabled people in fucking ANY conversation it's insane. one of the contestants (chris mccausland) on strictly come dancing this year (uk celebrity dance competition) is blind and he's been doing a really good job so far and getting really good scores and instead of talking about how insanely impressive it is that a) someone with no dance experience is able to pick up the routines so fast and do them so well and b) someone who is blind is able to do complex dance routines without even being able to see what their teacher is doing literally ALL the positive comments are about how amazing his professional teacher is and it's like yes of course she is but like it's literally all about how she's amazing and she's a genius and wow she must be so patient and shit and it's like ???? his job is a million times harder than hers. i am saying this as someone who danced for fifteen years and did it semi professionally for two. dancing is way harder than people think it is just generally but being able to do it well when you can't see ????? that takes INSANE talent and patience and hard work but people can't fucking see disabled people as the same as themselves so they have to put half of their praise on somebody else first and save the disabled person as an afterthought

[citron-shame]

Thinking about Citron and the type of music she'd listen to. Probably Vocaloid and boy failure songs exclusively.

Luka is her favourite

[starlene]

I gotta say, the amount of musical!Jekyll/Hyde x Utterson stuff I've scrapped across the years because of various Jekyll/Hyde would not act like that reasons is not inconsiderable.

For a person who's writing about a character whose canon characterisation is teetering very dangerously on the brink between "intriguing and three-dimensional" and "did anyone use their thinking brain while they were writing this", I'm certainly holding up some high standards of integrity for myself.

[sherlock-is-ace]

.

[lawfulspawnofthedevil]

Something that I'd love to not see anymore going forward is people suggesting trauma is the only valid reason to respect someone's boundaries. Like yeah my parents fought alot before I could wipe my ass properly, but have you tried not yelling in anger at someone to get your point across because its universally fucking rude? Why do I NEED to wear my autism on my sleeve for people to finally use their damn inside voices? Let me just dump more dry eggshells on the floor for you fucks to tiptoe around, why don't I?

Nevermind telling a stranger that "yelling is her trigger 🥺" is patronizing as fuck, but do you think someone that dead set on being that unpleasant is gonna care? All I'm seeing is someone nudging me into harm's way.

[the-one-and-only-overlass]

Given that one of the sources of potential inspiration listed in the Exalted core book is Howl's Moving Castle, you could make a coherent argument that Exalted has "Studio Ghibli Vibes"

I am also getting into it about TTRPG design and anime over on my bluesky btw

[bell-swamp-fitzjames]

terror is a special interest of mine bc it makes me so happy to endlessly examine and think about all the different characters, to go from the big picture FE then down to lets just be a little sillay what if tuunbaq and blanky, but also I must highligh I looove how many ppl with niche interests & who are into history to varying degrees etc etc are attracted to the terror (2018) like slay everyone! anyways i'm ending this on the fact that I so badly want to read Ada Blackjack again god damn

[tears-of-boredom]

being non-verbal -whether its for the forseeable future or for just a moment- is not rude, is not unkind, and neither is it unpolite.

[catinfroghat]

My grandad's back in hospital because he got worked up about my Nan's memory issues and then argued with my mom about her care and my mom's pissed off at my uncle as well because he and my grandad made plans without asking for my mom's input (who is the only medical professional in the family) or asking nan what she wanted and my nan is upset because she's scared and feels like it's all her fault for needing help um lmao it's probably a good thing we're not having Christmas dinner as a family this year