#fix/edit breakdowns

[kaiowut99]

Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters GX Episodes 115-116 Subbed (Finalized) - Fixes/Edits Breakdown

Since it’s 2024 and Tumblr still has a dumb link limit in posts, I’ve made this separate post supplementing my 115-116 Release Post with my usual animation fix/edit breakdown for the interested, since I did still want to give folks a more visual idea as I’ve been doing. Details below the cut!

Fixes and Edits! (115)

Early in the episode, as Amon sneaks through the vents within Cobra's laboratory, he's getting data from his surroundings on his little spy lens; on it, there's a typo with the word "infrared" in "Infrared rays," misspelled as "infraed." I fixed this first in Photoshop, first in the earlier part of the shot where it's all black behind everything, then in the latter half as we see the vent's surroundings behind the lens (using the Clone Tool some to redo the wall behind the text some; I had trouble trying to identify the font used there, so I went with a very similar one and corrected it to "Infrared rays," redoing the "Luminosity" and "Ultraviolet rays" text also so that my edit blended in. Once both frames were fixed, I threw them into Vegas, where I worked to fade them into each other with the rest of the shot, doing my best to make it pretty seamless; think it is! (Interestingly, the dub left the text alone, "infraed" and all lol.)

Later, as we start going through Johan's flashback to meeting Tom, we see him following Jerry Beans Man's Spirit to where Tom is laying unconscious, his cards littered around him--except for some reason, he apparently has two copies of Hamon, Lord of Striking Thunder?? (Not to be outdone, the dub gave him two Winged Dragons of Ra.) Considering Hamon is still supposed to be buried under Duel Academia, I fixed this by using Photoshop to remove one and make another one of the face-down cards by using the Clone Tool to draw up another one based on one in the shot; I did this in one frame, which I then took into AfterEffects and motion-tracked to re-do the rapid zoom-out on the shot, applying a light masking of a black-color layer along the edges of the shot to replicate the black border around the flashback over the removal edit on the left.

In the very next shot, we have a close-up of Tom lying on the ground, where he still has a copy of Hamon along with a... brown rectangle of a card... and Jerry Beans Man, even though we find out later that Giese had already taken it by this point? Fixed this one in Photoshop by making the copy of Hamon a face-down card, while I reused a proxy of Drone/Doron from when I made one as I worked on episode 90, to fix the blank brown rectangle and fit with some of the older cards he has there; to fix the erroneous Jerry, I took a page from the dub and gave him a Petit Angel proxy. Once I applied these fixes to a frame, I took it into AfterEffects where I used motion tracking to redo the panning on the shot. (The dub gives him Ra again, but also keeps both Jerry Beans there and the brown blank rectangle.)

After briefly cutting back to Judai and Johan, Johan continues his flashback as Tom tells him that he lost his Jerry Beans Man but he put up a good fight against the "big and scary" guy that took him--as he does, we're zooming out from the two of them, cards spread around and all, and we see he still has a copy of Hamon there, along with Jerry Beans Man contradicting his story a bit, lol. Fixed in Photoshop on the first frame of the zoom-out, replacing that Hamon with my Drone proxy (consistent with its placement in the earlier shot) and Jerry Beans with Petit Angel; once done, after I spent a good chunk of a weekend trying to make AfterEffects's track motion work for the whole shot and accurately track it as things zoomed out so much (a bit tough for a 16-second clip), I ultimately took the frame into Sony Vegas and redid the zoom-out there, using maybe 20 initial keyframes throughout to ensure correct positioning before I dove in for a more frame-by-frame look and adjusted as needed. All told, that ended up being far easier than waiting for AfterEffects, lol. (The dub, meanwhile, still replaces Hamon with Ra for reasons, but also decides to give him a bunch of random Judai cards, from Oversoul to Transcendent Wings to Bubble Shuffle to Cocoon Veil I think? The Jerry card is replaced with what I'd guess is Ancient Elf from a later shot, but I can't really ID the art, lol.)

A bit later, after reassuring Tom that Jerry Beans Man's Spirit asked him to help him, Johan says that Spirits do exist and that Jerry Beans Man will find its way back to him if he believes, to which Tom nods and smiles--as he does, we see behind him that Jerry Beans Man is still there. Fixed by replacing it with Petit Angel in AfterEffects, using Track Motion to pan it along with the shot, also duplicating its layer and doing some color correction and masking to ensure it's partly darker while along the black border of the flashback.

Later, after Giese snatches Sapphire Pegasus and Johan chases him down, the two start to duel; as they prepare their Disks on a split-screen, there's a quick frame where their split-screen starts to split apart where they move but don't actually split apart; the next shot of the field isn't shown between them, Johan's split being more visible instead. There's also a timing issue as they split apart which causes Johan's split to be uneven with Giese's as their slide-out ends. Fixed both in Vegas by masking in part of the next shot in between them, adding a border to Johan's split, and then redoing his split slightly to time it evenly with Giese's.

[list continues below after a brief split due to Tumblr being dumb]

(7) As Johan begins his turn, he moves to draw a card, but there are a quick few frames where his third Monster Zone is actually not drawn in, causing the whooshing background behind him to be visible. As mentioned in the 113-114 breakdown, I fixed this first here before applying the fix to the 115 preview in 114, taking the 2-3 frames in question into Photoshop and drawing in his Zone, adding a little bit of blurred red lighting over the edit to radiate a bit of the lighting from the orb on his Disk some.

(8) After having Amethyst Cat go for a direct attack against Giese using her effect only for her to be ultimately trapped by his Hunting Net Counter Trap, Johan is shocked as she's snatched up--but for a quick two frames during their split-screen, the animation team forgot the net she should be trapped in. Quickly fixed in Vegas by just holding the frame of her in that position with the net on her over the two erroneous frames. (Alternate caption: Amethyst Cat is so high right now.)

(9) After the eyecatch, as Giese summons his Lure Phantom back out to the field, Johan promises Amethyst Cat that he'll get her out, prompting Giese to slide in on a split-screen to ask if Johan really wants to save her that badly--but a timing issue with the split-screen forming happens in that Johan isn't moved behind him as his split starts sliding in. Fixed in Vegas by moving Johan behind him as it slides in properly.

(10) A few seconds after #9, as Giese plays his Dark Auction Magic Card to give him a chance of rescuing Amethyst Cat, he mentions that it has a price which comes out of Johan's Life, which he immediately offers to free her--but as this part of their exchange happens, they click into a split-screen rather than slide into one, but the sound team erroneously used the SFX for splits sliding into a split-screen (which the dub also fixed). To fix this, I first took the audio in this clip and ran it through UVROnline (an online GUI version of UltimateVocalRemover), then I also ran some of the audio during their exchange at the end of the episode about where Rainbow Dragon's stone tablet is (to pull the clicking SFX from as it's a quiet, no-OST scene) through it; I took the split audio into Vegas where I used as much of the original audio in the clip as doable, applying a mix of the vocal-isolated dialogue, the isolated clicking SFX, and slight recreation of the "Rival" OST off GX Sound Duel 2 specifically at those points I was trying to fix the SFX in. Came out pretty well! (I did a similar fix back in 102 as Bubbleman's ATK shot down with Bubble Shot 's destruction but they used the LP-hit-zero SFX instead of the counter-value-set one.)

(11) After Johan pays 1200 LP to free Amethyst Cat thanks to Giese's Dark Auction Magic Card, Giese lets her run back to him, but we see that the Lure Phantom in Monster Zone 4 on his Disk is in Attack Mode when it should be in Defense Mode. Fixed first in Photoshop by blanking that Monster Zone, then in AfterEffects by putting a Defense-Mode proxy into position, tracking the motion of the shot to move it towards the left with Giese as the shot pans towards Amethyst running back.

(12) As Johan starts his turn after Giese re-captures Amethyst Cat, there are a few frames before he shifts his gaze towards Sapphire Pegasus (whose breathing is labored here) where there's a weird extension of his Disk's coloring past the end of the Disk, covering up the wall behind him, and his face-down card is also slightly miscolored from how it was prior in the shot. Fixed first in Photoshop by restoring the wall in that space (mostly by copy/pasting from the previous frame, coloring in the few pieces left due to how the Disk shifted as he moved), then in Vegas where I mixed the fixed frame into the footage.

[list continues below after a brief split due to Tumblr being dumb]

(13) As Giese explains how his capsules work to sap Spirits of their energy, he turns to the Gokipon he has trapped to demonstrate what happens when they're fully drained of it all, and before it ends up going sparklepoof, we see that the Lure Phantom on his Disk is in Attack Mode again when it's still in Defense Mode. Fixed in AfterEffects by applying my proxy, using light track motion during the movement frames in the shot as it pans downward to move the proxy along accordingly, while also retaining the added shading due to how his Disk is facing with a duplicate layer to which I applied a darker brightness and a mask along the shading ridges.

(14) After using his Capture Trap Trap Card to capture Amber Mammoth, Giese states his view that a real hunt is about predicting lower animals' behavior to lead them right into his traps; Johan is angry at the idea, and Giese slides in on a split-screen to mock him by saying that he didn't expect to have already captured his second Gem Beast--though his split starts sliding in already being a fair way into the shot on the first frame, rather than starting barely visible on the lefthand side as usual. Fixed in Vegas by redoing his split-screen to make it more fluid and start it just barely out of the left side of the shot.

(15) During the preview for 116, we see a clip with a captured Topaz Tiger joining Amber Mammoth and Amethyst Cat before their split-screen splits apart to show Giese behind them swinging his whip to cause damage to Johan (as we find out, this being due to his Substitute Pain card)--but a few things happen: a) Topaz Tiger's missing his left eye, and b) as Giese comes into the shot with his whip, there are a few frames as he swings his Disk around while getting into position and then as he swings his whip where the Camouflage Guardna card he eventually plays in 116 proper is missing on his Disk, causing the whooshing background behind him to be visible in that space. I fixed (a) by using mostly Vegas to mask in the fixed version of his split during that shot in 116--I was originally going to just try to mask his fixed eye into the shot thinking the net around him was the same, but as I brought in the 116 clip, I realized they also adjusted how the net was drawn on him slightly, with only the ropes along the right part of his head/the "PREVIEW" text being consistent; as a result, I had to mask in most of his split from 116 while the shot was still, then as all their splits split apart and Topaz was moving upward along the preview text, I used Photoshop to move his fixed split into place for the frames it moves in, and then brought the fixed frames into Vegas to add to the video. I then fixed (b) using AfterEffects, fixing this first for the 116 shot by adding in a Camouflage Guardna proxy I made where it was missing to bridge the gaps as Giese swung his arm around, then bringing the fix into Vegas to mask into the full preview clip that I added to the DVDRip I'll be releasing. (In 116, there's a different issue with the Gem Beasts' split screen unrelated to Topaz specifically that I'll get into in 116's list.)

Fixes and Edits! (116)

After summoning it out using Triggered Summon and buffing his ATK using M Force, Johan has Emerald Turtle attack Giese's second Hell Gundog, but there's a quick 2-3 frames where Emerald Turtle is missing from Johan's Disk as he swings his arm around, making the whooshing background behind him visible in that spot. Fixed in AfterEffects by applying an Emerald Turtle proxy over that spot.

After Giese uses his second Gundog's effect to summon a third, Johan taunts him and says he should be more grateful to his Monsters; he then ends his turn by switching Emerald Turtle to Defense Mode with his effect, but for some reason, he has a Hell Gundog on his Disk where his Turtle should be. Fixed in AfterEffects by applying my proxy, using motion-tracking to move it along with Johan as the shot pans and masking in Emerald Turtle over the edit as needed for blending as he moves.

Immediately after #2, Giese then draws for his turn, but the Hell Gundog on his Disk is shown in Attack Mode when it's still in Defense Mode--judging from how small it is on his Disk, I assume they did mean to put it in Defense Mode. Fixed in AfterEffects by applying a proxy in Defense Mode, using some motion-tracking to move it along with Giese as the shot pans.

After Giese tries to play off his face-down-card bluff with some bravado and Johan takes notice, reading it as him having just set a meaningless Magic Card, as their split-screen splits apart for Johan to highlight that, Emerald Turtle's Defense-Mode card on the field is facing the wrong way (its name box should be facing to Johan's right to match its position on his Disk when in front of him). Fixed this in AfterEffects first after I reversed the shot using Vegas, as I applied a proxy facing correctly under Turtle and then applied motion tracking to pan it along with the shot up until Giese's split covers it up; once that was done, I unreversed the fixed clip in Vegas and then masked in Giese's split over the proxy edit and re-slid it offscreen.

After Giese's shock that Johan knew he was bluffing, Johan switches his Emerald Turtle back to Attack Mode for an attack, but as he does, he again has a Hell Gundog where Emerald Turtle should be on his Disk while Topaz Tiger's absent from Monster Zone 2, and there's also an odd coloring error where the Cemetery slot on Johan's Disk isn't colored in black for the first few frames before Johan moves. Fixed both in AfterEffects by first applying a Turtle proxy over the Hell Gundog card and adding my Topaz Tiger proxy into Monster Zone 2, using motion tracking and adjustments to their CC Power Pin effects to move them along with Johan as the shot pans and masking in his fingers over the card as he physically switches it to Attack Mode, then by masking in his Cemetery slot from an earlier shot (#2 above) that the start of this one is recycled from. [Fun fact: I first fixed this two weeks ago and then realized I forgot about Topaz when I drafted this post and pulled the clip back up, so I had to quickly revisit it :')]

Shortly after #5, once Emerald Turtle destroys Giese's last Hell Gundog, he uses Topaz Tiger for a direct attack, but as he declares the direct attack, Tiger and Turtle are both absent from his Disk for two quick arm-swinging frames, causing the whooshing background behind Johan to again be visible. Quickly fixed in AfterEffects by CC-Power-Pinning my proxies for them into place.

After the eyecatch and after Jim and co.'s touchbase, we cut to Amon still in the vents of the laboratory, noticing that security's tightening; he turns to grab something from his pocket, but as he does, the shading under his mouth for his lips vanishes despite his head staying still. A quick fix in Vegas as I just masked in that lip shading over the shot for the duration of it missing.

Back at the duel, after Giese summons his Lure Phantom and Johan mentally promises Sapphire Pegasus he'll get him out, he begins his turn by switching Emerald Turtle back to Attack Mode--but in this semi-recycled bit of animation, the errors noted in #5 continue here, as both Topaz Tiger's missing from his Disk/Hell Gundog is again where Emerald Turtle should be and his Disk's Cemetery slot is miscolored without its black as the shot starts and before Johan starts to move. Fixed in AfterEffects as was done in #5, CC-Power-Pinning Turtle and Tiger into place, with motion tracking to move it along with Johan as the shot pans, and bringing back the frame from the earlier shot with his Cemetery correctly colored to mask it in as the shot starts. [As with #5, I'd only just noticed I missed Topaz Tiger missing as I drafted this post, two weeks after I initially fixed this :') Also, this being a recycled shot, I thought I'd use screenshots from a different part of the shot for this one, lol.]

[list continues below after a brief split due to Tumblr being dumb]

(9) A bit later, after Giese reveals to Johan that he was the one who took Tom's Jerry Beans Man and Johan insists that they had a bond despite Tom not being able to see its Spirit, we flashback to Johan reassuring Tom about Jerry Beans Man to see that Giese was standing just outside the courtyard they were in with it in hand, but we see Jerry Beans Man still behind Tom as he nods and smiles at Johan. To fix this, I reprised edit #5 in 115's list and replaced Jerry Beans Man with Petit Angel as done there, tweaking the edit so that it's partly lighter while close to the white flashback border.

(10) As Giese later activates his Substitute Pain Magic Card, intending to deal Johan damage for each Gem Beast he captured, Topaz Tiger, Amber Mammoth, and Amethyst Cat appear on a split-screen before it splits apart to show Giese coming into the shot behind them preparing to swing his whip to send the damage his way--but a few things happen: a) as the Gem Beasts' split-screen splits apart, there's a quick frame where Tiger and Mammoth's splits are detached from their intended borders, and b) as Giese comes into the shot with his whip, there are a few frames as he swings his Disk around while getting into position and then as he swings his whip where his Camouflage Guardna card is missing on his Disk, causing the whooshing background behind him to be visible in that space. As mentioned in #15 on 115's list, I fixed things here first before applying things to the preview shot in 115, fixing (a) by first using Vegas to restore most of the borders on Tiger and Mammoth's splits, then taking the frame in question into Photoshop to finish the job by using the Clone Tool some and also cutting in bits of the background in between the splits to get rid of the leftover error borders. I then fixed (b) using AfterEffects, adding in a Camouflage Guardna proxy I made where it was missing to bridge the gaps as Giese swung his arm around, then bringing the fix into Vegas to put together the full fixed clip. (From an editing standpoint, I'm also very amused with how 4Kids handled the latter, as they forgot to mask in part of Giese's Disk over the dubified card they put into place the way I did, so the card bleeds onto Giese's Disk in spots, lol.)

(11) As Johan reels from Substitute Pain's damage, laughs and asks if taking damage for his Gem Beasts makes Johan happy--but during this long shot of the field, as we pan to Johan, we see that the card under his Defense-Mode Emerald Turtle is facing incorrectly, with its name box facing Johan's left when it should be to his right to match its position on his Disk. Fixed in AfterEffects, first applying an Emerald Turtle proxy after reversing the shot, masking in Turtle himself over it, then using motion tracking to move the proxy and my Turtle mask along with the panning in the shot; once done, I took the fix into Vegas, where I un-reversed it and added it to the full clip.

(12) After Giese suggests that Johan could desert Jerry Beans Man here with no one none the wiser and Judai arrives to look on, Johan insists that he just can't do that--but as he does so, we see that he seemingly again has Hell Gundog on his Disk in Emerald Turtle's place, but also in Monster Zone 3 this time instead of Monster Zone 4. Fixed first in Photoshop by blanking Zone 3 in the first frame of the shot, then in AfterEffects as I brought in that fixed frame, applied a Defense-Mode Turtle proxy in Zone 4, and used motion tracking to move both Zones with Johan as the shot pans.

(13) As Johan makes clear his goal of bringing Spirits and humans together and Judai runs out to try and help him, Giese taunts Johan and says that he'll send Jerry Beans's Spirit to the next world to join Sapphire Pegasus as his punishment for not choosing to save Jerry Beans--but as he does, we see Camouflage Guardna on his Disk facing incorrectly, with its name box facing Giese's left. A quick fix in AfterEffects after I CC-Power-Pinned a correctly facing proxy into place.

(14) After summoning Sapphire Pegasus and using his effect to place Ruby Carbuncle in his Magic/Trap Zone, Johan activates his Take to the Wings Magic Card, but as we zoom out on him to see him raise his arm for it before Sapphire Pegasus flies into the shot, Emerald Turtle is reversed on his Disk, its name box facing his left. Fixed in AfterEffects by applying a correctly facing proxy, adjusting its CC Power Pin effect as needed during the zoom-out.

(15) As Take to the Wings then frees Topaz Tiger, Amber Mammoth, and Amethyst Cat from Giese's traps (about to return them to Johan's hand), there's a quick frame as the split-screen they're on splits apart where the full split-screen's border lines are still there as we start to see Giese behind them. Fixed in Photoshop first, cutting in the visible parts of the Giese shot from the next frame over the lingering border lines, then mixing the fixed frame into the footage in Vegas.

[list ends below after a brief split due to Tumblr being dumb]

(16) As Take to the Wings works to return the Gem Beasts in play to Johan's hand, we see Ruby Carbuncle and Emerald Turtle's gems in his Magic/Trap Zone turn into light to make their return, but two odd errors happen with their split-screen: a) there's a random bit of extra split-screen border on Turtle's side along the bottom third of the screen; and b) as they start to split apart, there's a quick frame where Turtle's split doesn't move while Ruby's does, and we see more of the background in Turtle's split behind Ruby's moving split instead of Sapphire Pegasus being transitioned into. Fixed both in Vegas, first re-applying a full border to cover up the extra bit jutting out along the bottom third of the screen, then redoing the start of the split-screen splitting apart by properly moving Turtle's split and then masking in Sapphire Pegasus behind/between both splits.

[lovesickeros]

trying to get some writing done but I'm in absolute shambles who built this site bc it needs to be thrown away immediately. just shut it down.

[lilianne-tarot]

PICK A CARD: How will your future spouse pursue you ⋆˙⟡

✧˚. How to Pick Your Pile: Take a deep breath, clear your mind, and look at the images above. Which one pulls you in the most? Trust your gut! Once you choose the image, The number below your chosen image is your pile. If more than one catches your eye, that just means there’s extra tea for you, go ahead and read both!

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✧˚. My Masterlist🫶🏻

⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ PILE I

Cards Pulled: king of swords, knight of cups reversed, king of pentacles, the sun, the tower, 2 of swords

Right off the bat, you’re gonna think this person is cold. PERIOD. I’m sorry, but King of Swords as the first card, this ain’t some gushy softie sliding into your DMs with heart emojis and “wyd baby.” Nah, theyre giving emotionally disciplined, calculating, and “I only let three people see the real me and you’re not on the list… yet. YET” they might come across lowkey intimidating at first, like, the kind of person who’s quiet in group settings but throws out that one sarcastic comment that’s so sharp it makes everyone laugh and feel personally attacked. 😭💀

BUT TRUST ME, they’re watching you. Like… a hawk. They’re the type who is taking mental notes on your coffee order, your laugh patterns, the way you furrow your brows when you’re deep in thought, stuff even you don’t know you do. But honesty love….. they’re into you from day one, but they plays it off like he’s unbothered. Classic King of Swords move. Strategic af. Theyre lowkey fighting himself. Like, internally they got this soft, romantic, borderline poetic thing brewing, he fantasizes about running into you by “accident,” planning the most aesthetic dates, imagining you in his hoodie😭but he’s actively repressing it. Because vulnerability? He’d rather eat glass, thanks. He doesn’t want to be obvious. He’s convinced if he lets on how deep he’s feeling this, he’ll lose the upper hand or get hurt. So what does he do instead? Weird passive-aggressive things. Acts uninterested one minute, then gives you eyes across the room like he’s trying to telepathically undress your soul the next. Sir. Pick a lane. He doesn’t chase, he builds. He slowly starts showing up for you in the most tangible, grounded ways. Need help with something? He’s already on it. Mentioned your favorite snack in passing? It just “randomly” appears next time. The way this man provides?? You’ll be SHOOK. He’s not flashy about it either. He’s like, “I got you” and means it. That’s when you start going: “Wait… are they… serious?” Because once this person is IN, he is IN. Like, no games, no pullbacks. Suddenly it’s "have you eaten?" and "text me when you get home" and "do you want me to fix that thing?." Husband mode activated. 

BUT THEN. Omg. THE TOWER. 😭 Baby this is where it goes OFF. Something will shift drastically. And honestly, You might be the one who triggers it, ofc we are talking about you here so. Like maybe you call him out for his hot-and-cold vibe, or you walk away ‘cause you’re done playing Guess Who: Feelings Edition. Whatever it is, it SHATTERS his cool-boy facade. The Tower is giving “omg I fumbled” realness. He suddenly realizes how much he could lose and spirals. Might even go quiet for a second, lick his wounds, have a whole emotional breakdown. But then… boom. THE SUN. This is where the magic happens. The pursuit becomes warm, honest, and loud. He stops hiding. He owns it. Like, “Yeah, I like you. Actually, I love you. Actually, I wanna grow old with you and argue about what brand of detergent we’re using.” You’ll feel seen, adored, and finally safe in this connection. It’s that post-breakdown glow-up. He starts expressing himself clearly, no longer scared to let you in.

But now. Girl. YOU are gonna be the one hesitating now 😭. That Tower moment hits you, too. You start overthinking: “Can I trust this sudden 180? Was he always this into me and just hiding it? Do I want someone who couldn’t be vulnerable from the start?” Like, your brain starts weighing everythings. And that’s valid! It’s hard to unsee someone’s walls once you’ve bumped into them. So how do you perceive him throughout this journey? At first, cold and confusing af. Then… weirdly magnetic. Then dependable and lowkey daddy-coded. Then chaotic and heartbreak-y. Then sunshine and deeply, deeply sincere. You’ll feel like you’re watching him peel back layer after layer, and each one gets softer, realer, and more him.

His hints would be subtle but intentional. He remembers small things. He lingers a bit longer in conversations than necessary. He suddenly shows interest in the things you love, even if they weren’t his vibe before. He gives you those “you’re the only person in this room I care about” eyes. He’ll NEVER say it first… until he breaks. And when he does? You’re done. Stick a fork in you. Soul snatched. Game over.

I am seeing like he might dream about you before things really pop off. He might tell you later like ,“I had this weird dream we were married lol” and laugh it off, but internall,y he’s BLUSHINGGG because the dream felt real. Also… idk why I’m seeing like… rain or some stormy weather being important??? Maybe the Tower moment literally happens during a stormy day and you both cry under the rain like a movie scene? (i mean…..idc… if i am getting me personal main character moment. It’s all part of the process, i guess💁🏻‍♀️).

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⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ PILE II

Cards Pulled: the tower, king of wands, 5 of pentacles, queen of cups, 8 of pentacles, 10 of pentacles

PILE 2, Okay but… why does this feel like a well written kdrama with 16 episodes??? I mean i could literally make a movie out of this pile 😭 my reaction to the cards were literally: oh, OH, ahh , TF, Oh. My. GOD.😭 

The drama. The rawness. The "I didn’t see this coming, but now I literally can’t look away" energy is off the charts. And I’m already obsessed. So let’s talk about how this chaotic yet painfully magnetic future spouse of yours is about to come stomping into your world like they own the place, with all their trauma and broken broken parts and this weirdly hot charisma that shouldn’t be attractive but is. And somehow?? You fall for it. But like… respectfully 😭.

this person doesn’t approach you like your average person in love would do. No flowers and shy glances. Nope. It’s giving, "I just burnt my life down and now I’m rebuilding from scratch and oh look, you’re here too," vibes. Like you know when someone walks into a room and they don’t say much but their energy is SCREAMING "I’ve been through the trauma you couldn't even imagine"? That’s them. Tower card energy straight up. Something’s just collapsed in their life, could be a major breakup, a career flop, family drama, or literally an existential crisis. Honestly? Feels like all three, let’s not lie 💀. But instead of moping around, this person grabs that chaos and turns it into… ambition. Swagger. Power. This is someone who knows how to lead. They pursue you like they’re chasing their next purpose. With intention. With clarity. And this lowkey intimidating confidence that says “I know what I want, and it’s you.” But let’s not pretend it’s smooth sailing here. Bc 5 of Pentacles? Babe. This person has been abandoned, emotionally iced out, or felt major rejection in the past. Like it’s giving "I’ve loved and I’ve lost and now I trust NO ONE but my dog”. And because of that, Their way of pursuing you is… messy. Not in a manipulative way, but in that "I’m trying to be a lover while still patching up my own wounds" type of mess. So expect mixed signals. Hot and cold. Deep talks followed by withdrawal. And you’re gonna be like, “Sir?? Do you like me or do you need therapy??” honestly: it’s both 😭.

Queen of Cups as the next card is where things get interesting. You. Literally you. You're intuitive AF, emotionally intelligent, and probably catch onto their emotional damage in the first week and are like “Yup. You’re hurt. But I see the softie under all that wreckage.” And here's where it gets wild: they know you see it. That’s what makes them pursue harder. You’re the first person who doesn’t just want them for their outer confidence and King of Wands hotness, you want to know their soul. Their weird inner child. Their guilt. Their hidden sadness. And that?? That shakes them. In a good way. You start noticing little things. Like how they’ll work on themselves just to be better for you. They start showing up. Maybe it’s slow, but you’ll see them trying, healing their abandonment issues, learning to communicate, showing effort in tangible ways. Like planning little dates, asking how your day was (and ACTUALLY listening….woah rare, ngl), sharing parts of their past without you asking. They might even pick up new skills or hobbies because you like them. A little "if she likes books, I read books now" moment?? 😭😭 Despite how mature and scarred and big-boss they may appear, at their core, they’re a newbie when it comes to actual healthy love. Like yeah, they’ve loved before. But not YOU kind of love. Not “you see me even when I’m not performing” kind of love. And that humbles the hell out of them. They're awkward about it. Like, "I wanna give you the world but I also don’t know how to wrap a gift box correctly." 😭 It’s so endearing, you can’t help but melt. They pursue you like someone relearning love from scratch, and you become their soft place to land. They’ll stumble. They’ll overthink. But babe, they’ll try. And that’s what makes them fall harder. Because this ain’t about seduction. It’s about growth. They're not gonna outright confess their feels in the beginning. It’s gonna be hidden in acts of service. Like fixing your broken lamp. Or sending you a meme with a weird caption like, "reminds me of u" Or casually saying “I don’t talk to many people like I do with you,” and then acting like it wasn’t a full-on emotional proposal. Their love language is subtle till it’s not, okay?? But your intuitive self picks up on every damn sign, and you’ll know before they even open their mouth. That’s the connection here, psychic soulmate level. You’ll feel their love way before it’s said.

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⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ PILE III

Cards Pulled: king of wands, 3 of cups, knight of swords reversed, the devil, 8 of cups, the star

OKAY, PILE 3 is here and… GIRL this pile has such strong, “Dark romance” vibes and also that “enemies to lovers but we’re obsessed with each other” trope energy like NO OTHER 😮‍💨🔥. Your future spouse? It’s that person who shows up outta nowhere and instantly throws your life into disarray because the connection is too much, too fast, too real. They pursue you like they’ve waited lifetimes to find you and now that you’re finally here, they’re not gonna risk losing you, even if it means accidentally traumatizing you with their intensity first 😭.

So let’s start with the vibe of this person, okay? Immediately I’m seeing someone who is dominant AF in presence, the type of person where the second they walk into a room, your attention shifts without your permission. But they’re not all flash and no depth, this person has that charismatic, “traumatized but make it aesthetic” confidence LOL. Think: the guy who’s lowkey too cool for everyone but gets soft for you 🫠. But it’s not just charm. It's calculated. They choose to pursue you. Like, they spotted you from across the damn soul contract timeline and were like, “Yep. That one. Mine.” LMAO.

Here’s where it gets juicy though, this person doesn’t make their pursuit clean or safe. We’ve got the Knight of Swords reversed mixed with The Devil and 3 of Cups… BABY. I’m not gonna lie, their approach is gonna have you shook. This isn't some slow-burn "lemme get to know you" type of chase. Nah, it’s giving intoxicated obsession. Like they’re coming at you way too fast, might say things they haven’t thought through (hello chaotic confessions??), maybe even making moves when you’re like “Wait… tf is happening?!” . And I SWEAR this person gives off the vibe of someone who might try to "just be friends" first… but they absolutely fail at it. Like... you’re not slick, sir. The way they look at you? Not very "friendly." More like "I wanna pin you to the wall in a meaningful way." 😭 it’s like you look into their eyes once aand you are going inot their crib TONIGHT. 

BUT. Their pursuit of you isn’t just lusty and impulsive, it’s coming from a place of deep yearning and soul ache. You’re literally the star they’ve been trying to find after walking away from a bunch of superficial crap. I’m getting that they’ve already been through a lot emotionally, they’ve had to let go of people, addictions (literal or emotional), maybe even success that wasn’t fulfilling. So while their approach is messy and extra (like “sir pls chill”), it’s coming from a place of craving real healing, real light, REAL connection. And guess what? That’s what you are to them. Their fkn North Star. And trust me, they don't even realize it at first, like they’re thinking they’re chasing a thrill, but gets, spiritual awakening outta nowhere. Bestie… you’re gonna think they’re too much. 😂 Straight up. You’ll be like “This person is hot, sure……but wtf is this energy??” It’ll feel like you’re constantly trying to decide between “should I kiss them or block them?” Energy chaotic AF. You’ll clock them trying to play it cool, but their eyes? Screaming "I'm feral for you." It’s also possible they’ll show up when you’re trying to move on from someone/something else, and you’ll be hesitant because you’re finally healing, vibing, living in peace, and here comes this walking temptation in human form, knocking on your aura like “hey 😏.” i mean really this emoji is the perfect example of how i am imagining this person.  There’s definitely a karmic undertone here, like you two have danced this dance before in past lives but it was let uncompleted. So now, they're NOT playing around. And the way The Star closes the reading? OOF. After all the chaos, the push/pull, the temptation, and messy little love games… they want peace with you. You are the peace. The wish. The endgame. But it’s not gonna come pretty.

Okay so their hints are not actually hints. They’ll accidentally drop the biggest signs , forgetting they’re supposed to pretend. They’ll joke about being obsessed with you? Deadass. They’ll mention you in every convo “by accident.” They might post quotes on their stories or make weird comments like “If I ever fall in love, it’ll be someone like you” 🙄, SIR. STOP. WE SEE YOU.  The 3 of Cups energy is also giving “I’ll use mutual friends to get close to you,” like casually showing up at a party where you just happen to be?? Please.And listen, not everything will be smooth sailing. That Devil energy is LOUD. There will be moments where you’ll wonder if you’re drawn to them because it’s fated… or because it’s toxic. But that’s part of the growth arc. They’re not here to ruin your life, they’re here to crack your heart open with messy hands. And once they realize that they can’t control you? That’s when the real magic starts. That’s when they fall so damn hard, they start building a whole new version of themselves just to be worthy of your light.

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Thank you so much for reading all the way through! I hope my reading resonated with you and that you had a lovely time going through it. If you enjoyed it, please like and reblog, it really means a lot! Let me know which pile you chose; I absolutely love hearing your thoughts and feedback on my readings! If my reading resonated you, you may consider buying my paid reading as it would really help me out financially♡

Note: tarot cards provide guidance and possible insights into what could happen based on current energies, thoughts, and actions. the cards can highlight potential paths or outcomes, but they do not fixedly predict the future. this is a general reading so take what resonates!

[syluses]

HEART WANTS WHAT IT WANTS

𓍯𓂃 PART TWO (2) of the stepdad! sylus x reader series

(2) THE DEATH OF PEACE OF MIND

𓍯𓂃 CONTENT: stepdad! sylus therefore step/pseudocest, eventual smut, nsfw, dubcon, slowburn, yandere undertones, all characters are 18+ (mc is presently 23; sylus is in early forties), possessive & yandere behaviors, age difference, daddy kink, unreliable narrator, drinking, non-evol au, modern au, lowkey enemies to lovers, lots of (sexual) tension, loss of virginity, emotional breakdowns, some angst, some fluff, a lil bit of everything; tags will be added as story progresses— but know the story is relatively triggering

𓍯𓂃 SIDENOTE: ayyy finally got chapter 2 out ✨ apologies for the wait!! but i hope u enjoy this one my friends :] 💕 also sorry for any typos PLEASE overlook them i beg :,) i hate the edit/revise process it took SO long but i hope my sleep-addled brain did me decent as i went thru to correct stuff. oh also i made a teeny mistake in part one, but i fixed it and its very inconsequential (used wrong number: 6 changed to 7). but anyway just letting u know if ur very observant & noticed a difference lol!! [art credit: @/chimmyming on twitter/X]

It’s hard to be secretive, tiptoeing down the hallway toward the stairs, when halfway through it opens up into the living room’s overhang.

If someone were sitting on the couch, and they heard so much as a creak from above, all it’d take is a glance thrown over their shoulder to spot you with a hand hesitantly placed on the banister, leery of stepping down to the first floor.

Nervewracking.

Perhaps it’s a bit dramatic to compare it to walking into the lion’s den- but you’re not the most talkative of persons, especially not with him, and it does seem daunting in your head to be cornered into conversation. Like prey meeting predator. Small meeting big. One delicate discussion could do you in, but you won’t bet on your demise being brought along so… easily.

To your immense relief, when you you peek around the stone column and survey the area below (mainly the L-shaped sofa, facing the massive wall-mounted TV above the fireplace), you find it empty.

At that, you let out a quiet breath. Some of your courage returns.

If you had spotted the twins, it would’ve been manageable, more so than if it was their dad, anyway.

It was only an hour ago (well, an hour and ten minutes, but you hope they won’t hold that against you— and considering all their tardy slips in highschool, they wouldn’t have the right) that you’d held conversation with them, and it went alright.

It’s a bit harder for you to admit that it was actually pretty nice to see them again.

Cathartic, even.

There’s a part of you that’s vulnerable and girlish- carefully stowed beneath the tough skin you lay on in front of most of everyone else- locked somewhere safe- and yes, it did miss them.

But you’re meant to dislike the three of them. Your meddling stepfamily who slipped into the cracks of your home, your mother’s heart, no different than an invasive species would. Stuck a foot into the door of your life and pressed until the hinge gave.

Once, it was easy. As effortless as breathing.

You didn’t have to think about it, or deliberate on it, or make all the justifications in your head- no, you hated them and that was it.

That feeling was meant to be final. Set in stone.

You thought it was.

For a time you even likened Sylus to Cinderella’s evil stepmother and his two conniving sons to the insufferable stepsisters. Oh, it’s childish, you know; looking back on those moments, you don’t know whether you want to hug the teenage girl you’d been or laugh in the face of her.

As it stands, though, Anastasia and Drizella aren’t half the monsters you’d once liked to believe. Awfully enough, you’ve warmed up to them, maybe even came to love them.

You’re stubborn, not stupid: Luke and Kieran have a special place in your heart and you recognize that.

You’re sure that they do, too. It’s what makes them bolder during every confrontation; brings out the smiles where they once paled. Scared you’d yell or shriek for your mom to just—

Get these two idiots out of my room!

That was then, though.

Things are different now. Changed.

…The ‘Lady Tremaine’ in this picture is still a work in progress. If you’re being honest, you wouldn’t be too terribly upset if it stayed that way—

No. But no, because…

Your mother would’ve been happy if you got along with him. Made amends. It’s a truth as sour as it is undebatable.

“Baby, please- he’s a good man, really. Can you just try, for me? I know you miss your dad, I know you do, I do, too-“

‘Does she?’ To save your hide, you bite that remark down, but listen on just as grumpily.

“-but I think that this can be a good thing if you just-“

Her words echo in the walls of your head. Plangent, bouncing. Like a gunshot ringing out through a canyon, it’s still loud in your conscience, even more so now that she won’t be around to nag you on the matter any further.

—“Smiled.”

If you don’t like Sylus, you’re the bad guy, right? And damn it all if that doesn’t dredge up an ounce of bitterness in you, but—

…For the sake of this trip, for the sake of her no longer being here (and oh, what you wouldn’t give so she could be here), you’ll do your best to swallow down your misgivings about your stepfather.

And you’ll be good.

Two weeks.

Reminding yourself of that for what must be the millionth time, you push off the truffle-wrap pillar to continue into the lofty hall. Starting down the wide, marble staircase in silence.

You’re not so sure where their father is. You definitely have your guesses— A fancy-shmancy meeting or outing that’s called him outside of the estate, or perhaps he’s simply in his study working, running an errand— All of which you hope are correct for the sake of avoiding him.

This late lunch of yours and the twins’ should be just that.

Yours and the twins’.

✦

The further you press into the first floor, the more you smell whatever the private chef is cooking.

Delicious, whatever it is. And no surprise there- the man who hired him demands only the best of the best. He’ll brook nothing less.

As you get closer, the aromas (some too faint to label, others almost dominating your senses: garlic, a pinch of ginger, the mouthwatering scent of meat) blend into a savory potpourri. A cohesive, expertly-made dish, you’re sure.

It’s true that in the past five years since your moving out that your visits have become more sporadic, far and few in between, but meals gathered around a tabletop brimming with tasty sides and entrées will always be a distinct memory you hold of this place.

I mean, you were all but forced by your mother to endure them. Thus, dinner became a special time for you and your stepfamily to bond.

Even Sylus, the endlessly busy CEO of some lucrative company you pretend not to know the name of, made room within his schedule where he could.

However, bonding is not what generally happened.

Teenage you always thought those dinners were stupid. Awkward at the best of times. Smiles too tight to be polite, hands passing around bowls you’d stick your nose up to. Not out of disgust, no, the platters never failed to make you drool- but because you’d take your dad’s homemade roast chicken over your stepfather’s insincere, gourmet trays any day of the week.

To be honest? you’d been mean to them, you’ll admit that much. Cruel even. A big brat with an even bigger bone to pick. You and your family didn’t come from rags, but your origins were infinitely more humble than the twin’s, than what Sylus had— yet you were prissy and rude in a way that they somehow weren’t... Presumptuous.

So upset with the new arrangement you couldn’t think straight.

“Y/n, pick up the fork for God’s sake- can’t you see your father went through all this just to have a meal with us tonight?”

Placatingly, “Honey. It’s alright.”

It’s not quite a snarl that you throw her way, but it’s close. With no one here to spank you, you’re allowed to mouth off a little, be unruly. No one’s here to stop you— your mother’s never had the arm for the paddle and regardless of that, she clearly shouldn’t be responsible over you if she can’t even make good decisions for herself.

To date, her worst decision yet is bringing that asshole around…

Pointedly ignoring the attention that’s gravitated to you, you scowl.

Maybe you are pushing the part of brat a touch too far- a shock, taking your past obedience into play- but how else will you get her to see you? Your hurt? I mean, the twins misbehave endlessly at school and at best, they get a slap on the wrist, no doubt because of their mogul of a father, but you don’t miss the laughs or rueful glances tossed their way.

The positive feedback.

“…Father?” You snip, eyes laser-focused on the woman at the far end of the table. The twins juggle between watching you and their dad with bated breath, half grinning in mischievous delight.

For several moments, the latter doesn’t move.

Sure enough, though, that cardinal gaze finds its roost on you. Not that you’re paying it any mind.

The air shifts when you open your mouth again, rising from the table with a start. The finely-placed cutlery jumps as you do.

“I don’t care if you’ve married him, made him your ‘quote on quote’ husband, that’s not my father and never will be. And these stupid boys that trail me all damn day long aren’t my family, either!”

“Whoa-ho! We caught a stray, bro!”

A beat of stunned silence.

Galileo crosses your mind; mainly what he did when the spotlight fell to him. The point is that there’s still time to recant, the rational part of your brain whispers. To backtrack.

Your cheeks warm. Heart pounding in your chest at the embarrassment of voicing your emotions, making a literal stand. But you can’t stop now. It’s too late to.

“A-And…” A tremble. You’re- You’re trembling, comes the small revelation. Ignoring it, you barely repress a wince, standing there uncertainly.

Finally, your mother- finding her bearings- angrily sputters out your government name.

You almost cow to it.

But you can’t be weak, not now, not in front of them, and-

In a frantic moment, your eyes dart over opposite the table to collide with his, your voice shaking wildly as the twins, at either side of you, snicker.

You swallow down the dregs of your self-consciousness to uncivilly pick up your fork and wave it at him.

“And you! Don’t even get me started on how awful you are! What you’ve done to me!”

All along you’ve done your damnedest to ignore him, only adding in your two cents where it was absolutely necessary. The last month or two you’ve spent under the same roof as him has been nothing less than an excellent demonstration of the cold shoulder on your part. You want the credit for that.

So when you point a literal finger, staring him down like you would prey through a muzzle and furrow your brow as unbidden tears wet your lash-line, his eyes actually double in size. Your stepfather, having forgotten to breathe by the looks of it (albeit, you have too), straightens by a fraction.

Good. That’s...

That’s good, you think.

Something in the back of your mind says ‘heel,’ says ‘don’t poke the bear,’ warns in every possible language you can think of that this is NOT a good idea. He’s rich enough to fill whole swimming pools with cash and powerful enough to move people like chess pieces— probably nudge them out of the game and off the board, too.

But he’ll never be the man of your house. You won’t allow it. So call it sheer stupidity on your end or just a death wish but—

“Y-You’ve stolen everything from me!”

On your right, Luke blinks with hesitant awe, his amusement petering out. Kieran’s jaw shuts. The foot he’d been kicking you with under the table draws away from yours. He exchanges a brief, suddenly sobered look with his brother as everything you’ve been holding back on these past several weeks looses to the surface.

“Y/n-!”

“You took it all! My mother, my dad’s honor, even my fucking house-!”

For the second time, your government name flies across the panel of demurred faces, but you’ve reached your melting point. The watershed where fear and politeness, all the conventional little things you’re supposed to respect and operate by, warps into hot unbridled anger.

This is a cut that originated from your father’s death, one exacerbated awfully by Sylus and his two sly, obnoxious sons- so you think it’s due time to let it bleed.

Bleed, it does.

But then- “You ruined my life, you-“

A breath. Stuttering and shallow and tender. It’s horrifying to realize it came from you.

“Y-You….”

Through the blur is a low, gentle murmur.

Rich and thick. You think even if your ears ceased to work, something in your chest could still recognize it; the bass moves through your ribs and rattles them.

In your periphery, for as fogged as it’s become what with the tears that suddenly speckle the room- the ones you vaguely acknowledge but do all you can to hold, even if just for a few more moments- the silver-haired man sets down his utensil. Nonchalant per usual. With unrivaled class.

It pisses you off.

Without looking at your frazzled mother, he raises a hand to calm her. “Shh, it’s alright, it’s alright. Let her speak.”

Speak…?

Oh- Is that what he fucking thinks this is? That you’ve stood, clinking the side of your glass with a spoon to humbly direct the diners’ attention from the plates spread tastefully before them to you as you prepare a fancy speech of sorts-?

This isn’t an announcement you’re making. This is not even a conversation. It’s just-

It’s just-

The epiphany that every set of eyes is on you including the chef’s (still tucked in the kitchen, as poor as any man could be as he hurriedly cleans up)— and that you are being treated no different than a dangerous animal that needs patience and slow movement to be handled, corralled back into a fucking cage—

It’s so infuriating you go quiet.

Your brain reaches a lapse and you shut up. Lips flattening into a pursed line immediately, you ball your fists and scamper back off to where it’s safest.

Your room.

“Sis, wait, Kieran said he’s sorry for kicking you under the table-“

You’d ignored it all and then you’d cried.

“Kieran,” an unexpected growl. “A word.”

…You suppose time has a funny way of soothing, though, because right now when you recollect the moment, you find the humor in it and scoff quietly.

“Dad, wait, I-I was just kidding around with her!”

Yeah okay, it was a bit embarrassing- you were a bit embarrassing- but you won’t hold that against sixteen year old you. She knew fuck all else how to navigate.

The big house is familiar and airy as you walk through the lower floor, as quiet as you left it.

Even if you’d forgotten the layout, whatever fragrance wafting from the kitchen would be enough to guide you there.

You wonder if it’s some kind of stirfry. A far cry from the humble PB&J’s you’ve been making yourself at home with chips sometimes as a side, but your tummy growls for it all the same.

You haven’t ate since sometime yesterday. As your tongue wets itself in anticipation, you’re made very aware of that now.

You spot the rice cooker on the side counter when you finally walk in and the blurred figures of the twins as they turn to look at you.

Luke, perched on a bar stool to eagerly watch the chef work his magic, hops off just to pull out another one at its right. The look in his eye, glittering, full of anticipation, tells you verbatim to ‘sit right here’. You don’t bother protesting- you’re already some minutes late after all- and climb up onto the seat between them.

Kieran, at your left, scoots closer to sling his arm over your shoulder. You let it happen with a small wince. The chair supporting the other twin gives a short screech when he, too, inches closer to fold his arms on the counter, lean his head on them, and angle his cheek to look at you.

“So, sis, how do you like Linkon so far?”

Not paying them much attention, you quirk an eyebrow.

Between watching the chef as he deftly tosses the pan back and forth (broccoli, you see now, with meat cubes he folds in) and glancing at the archways connecting the rest of the house into the kitchen- eyes peeled for someone- the twins are not your priority right now.

At the top, that list looks something like this: Eat a nice midday meal without any incident involving their dad.

“I’ve lived in Linkon almost all my life, don’t act like this is my first time here,” you poke back, albeit in a somewhat hushed tone. The walls might as well have ears.

Kieran reaches out to run an idle finger down the jut of your shoulder, his chin lazily propped up by his hand.

He looks at you.

“Sis, do you even realize for how long you were gone?”

His voice is light. Conversational. You’re not so deluded, though, by their indifferent, laidback act. You’ve known them not for a decade but not far off from that either, and you’ve learned to catch the whiff of trouble in the air before it blows its wind your way.

When you finally throw them each a gander, hesitantly prying your gaze from the open entries, the delight masked behind each placid set of eyes is absolutely there— just hiding well.

They’re getting much more amusement out of this than they’re letting on.

You’ll give them credit here: they’ve gotten better at pretending they’re not up to no good,… but there’s no bamboozling you.

You think about it for a few seconds before quipping back. “Almost seven months,… right?”

“Right,” Luke chirps beside you, “Seven whole months!” You turn your head to focus on him now.

(Ah, that’s right- you inwardly alert yourself upon notice- no matter who you’re facing, the other will inevitably be in your blindspot… Have to keep on your toes these upcoming weeks if you don’t want them pulling a trick on you.)

He pouts his lips, ever dramatic, to play up the kicked expression and make it all the more impactful as they guilt trip you. “Seven whole months where Kieran and I were left alllllll on our lonesome. Left to fend for ourselves.”

“Oh, you big babies.” With a huff, half-smiling, you lean out to flick his forehead. His hood slips off when he tries to nod away from your attack, laughing softly as wild, red tufts come loose.

“You’re plenty old enough now to care for yourselves. You can’t always rely on me for everything. Besides,” you start, thoughtful, and this is when your already quiet voice slinks into a whisper, one the boys draw in to hear.

Luke’s attention drifting past your shoulder, “you already have the big boss man covering your asses in every sense of the word.”

From the archway, a sonorous voice rings out.

“She’s right, you know.”

You and Kieran snap your heads over to look. The chef (and you don’t why you’re suddenly staring at him, or the ground, for that matter, nervous) gives a little glance his way, dipping his chin respectfully, but doesn’t note him beyond that. A big grin blooms across the lower half of Luke’s face. You’d smack it off if you could.

Beside you, Kieran suddenly lets out a chuckle, both of the twins once more very interested in you- particularly the reaction you’re trying to hide- as you swallow and look away.

Under the broad arch, their stepfather adjusts his sleeves before casually propping himself against the wall, arms folded.

You risk a glance over and instantly regret it when you catch his eyes on yours, a brow quirked teasingly.

…Directed at the boys, you realize when he speaks again. Of course. “You two lean on your sister far too much, don’t you think? I’d say you’re lucky she’s been so patient with you both.”

A huff from one of them. But they’re so similar it might as well come from the other. “Hah, I have the patience of a saint, especially when it comes to her! Don’t forget, dad, how long it took for me to get her to even talk to me-“

Frowning, you open your mouth to argue against that, to defend your past-self’s choices (because she had every reason to ignore the obnoxious pair), but to your suprise Luke beats you to the punch.

“Bro, you have to admit,” he starts with a sheepish laugh, “we were kind of annoying kids… I mean, we were pretty much always trying to find a new way to bother her…”

Curtly, you close your mouth. That deep, rumbling voice sounds out again- light in tone- and your heart skips a beat.

“Honesty’s not a bad start... Kieran, you might benefit from taking notes from your brother.”

“Eh…”

From behind the island, tucked in front of the stove- you swear you hear the cuisiner chuckle.

The pan sizzles. Your mouth waters and you’re reminded of how hungry you are, but the longer the silver-haired man lingers in the entryway the more you’re afraid he’s there to stay.

It was supposed to be just the three of you eating together. Not- Not him. And yeah, sure, this is his house at the end of the day— you wouldn’t be you if you weren’t already painfully aware of that- a fact that’s more obvious than ever now that your only real tether to this place, your mother, is gone— but why did he have to show up now of all times?

As every gripe starts to form in your head-

Two weeks. And then, and then it’ll be over for the last time.

-you silence them.

A moment passes and Luke, still studying you with the ghost of a grin, asks what you all really want to know.

“So, dad, are you staying for lunch?”

A beat. You furtively glance up in time to watch him check his expensive wristwatch, his brow furrowed.

“Lunch, you say?” He chuckles, ruby-red eyes practically sparkling when he lifts his chin, one corner of his mouth curved- though you can tell he’s trying to mask it. “And I guess this is the early bird special?”

“Sleepyhead Y/n here rolled out of bed late.”

You huff, crossing your arms, distracting yourself with the busy chef. “And these two all but barged in while I was still busy unpacking.”

Like clockwork, much of the mirth in his expression wanes. He frowns expectantly, voice neither stern nor flat but something in between. “Boys. What did I tell you about not pestering our guest while she’s still here?”

Luke and Kieran snicker. You bite down on a grin.

“Yeah, boys,” you murmur to be annoying, just loud enough for them to hear. That’s the hope, at least.

Sylus’s little smirk returns with a vengeance. He refolds his arms, adjusting.

“…Anyway, though. I can’t stay. I have a meeting I need to sit in at the main office, unfortunately. I would’ve…” A raking of his eyes between the three of you, interested, and a brief pause, “Enjoyed that, though.”

He hums, saying more to himself now than to any of you, “another time.”

For a number of moments, the air seems oddly tense. A miasma of something unsaid hangs between the four of you, thickening the air between, and in the split second before someone breaks the silence, you’re struggling to pinpoint the root cause.

It’s just the ice from last night, you decide quietly, the bits of it that didn’t break. The friction left over.

You’re still settling in, after all.

…And yet when his gaze finds yours again, something not to be uttered in it as cherry hues zero in on you, his lashes fluttering ever so slightly—

The pulse in your chest trips and picks itself back up again.

You blink, looking down to his chest. When your stare sweeps up again to his face, almost hesitant to find what may be waiting there, he’s addressing the twins and it’s already gone.

“Well. I’m out, then. Boys: don’t drive your sister crazy. And… Kitten…”

Your brow pinches unwittingly. There, again, is that strange yet patient twinkle in his eye and it steals all the breath from your lungs in one fell swoop.

Either side of you, Luke and Kieran trade off between appearing uncertain and then appearing just as eager. Behind the steaming stove, even the chef, cottoning onto the shift in atmosphere, tosses the briefest of looks over his shoulder to assess the situation.

You nervously wet your lip. “Y-Yeah?”

Promptly, your stepfather’s countenance smooths out into an easy, pellucid smile. A whit challenging; a whit encouraging— but not at all reluctant, no, the mite of intimidation in his gaze is a simple result of your clouded thinking these past few days. Nothing more.

“Don’t pull your punches if they do.”

A swallow. “Alright.”

The twins, no different than conspiring, bothersome little rats, slap a hand over their mouths to hide a laugh, and then their dad is skimming between all three of you in your row at the counter. Albeit, his tone is too gentle for them—

“Call if you need something,” he suggests.

And then he’s gone.

A tumbleweed blows through. Kieran turns to you afterward, Luke’s hand idly dangling off your shoulder, the pair far too comfortable with taking up your space- but for now, obedient enough.

“Well, chef, how’s it looking?”

Lunch is served on a silver platter.

Swallowing down your reservations, your typical discomfort with their casual, sumptuous lifestyle, you fold to your hunger and dig in.

Kieran, ever the pest, laughs when you finish before them, shoveling a share of his saucy broccoli onto your plate. His grin is shit-eating, but you can appreciate the generosity laced under his teasing remark for what it is.

“Wow, someone’s hungry, huh? Bet you’re wishing you ate during your flight!”

✦

In the hours after, you trampoline between idling through the massive home, revisiting various memories you hold of each room and long corridor, and sitting down with a hand over your full belly. Thinking.

Maybe all the reflection isn’t for the better, though, as much as you try to keep optimistic by playing dumb to your circumstances.

You don’t blame the boys for being so energetic, even amidst the doom and gloom that’s reared its head in just the past few days— it’s a lot to handle, everything with your mother, sure it is, but they’re known for their mischief, for being nothing but happy-go-lucky. Besides… sometimes grief manifests itself in strange ways. Whether it be through inconvenient fits of laughter or a stone-faced apathy, it’s all of the same brood: an interesting yet no less instinctual coping mechanism.

Considering you’ve been forcefully naive surrounding your reasons for being flown out, you know plenty about those mechanisms yourself.

It’s not impossible that they’re mourning her in their own way, the twins. Behind all the admittedly strange, insouciant remarks and the carelessness around such a delicate situation- tasteless at the best of times- you think you see it, the cracks.

The fleeting blips of unease in Luke’s eyes. The moments where the room goes quiet after a good joke makes its round through and he has to blink something away from his conscience. Or the gelidity of his brother, for that matter. The wide-eyed stare into nothingness before he, too, shakes it away like whatever it is is no more than an intrusive thought to be tossed aside and disregarded.

Not to mention they’re gentler with you. More… chivalrous, almost.

Exhibit A:

The boys approach you closer to sunset in your bedroom, their polite, small smiles and knocks before coming in pleasant surprises each.

Perched on your bedroom’s dormer window, you boredly flip through a book you’ve read at least thrice as they ask if you’ve found a dress yet for the funeral, as respectful as they ever could be.

On cue, your world weathers at the edges. Like paper thinning through after its corner is put to a lighter.

Right, right. A dress. The- The funeral….

You’ve not even been in the Qin estate for 24 hours but you’re already letting these things- these very paramount things- slip from your mind. They should be in the forefront of it, but the more you dwell on them (your priorities: using these two weeks to prepare for the ceremony, finding suitable attire, hopefully going through her belongings once you’re ready enough), the more it hurts, so you just shut it out.

See, all of this— the dreadful knowing that your veritable mother is gone and in terms of blood and bone family, you’re now left utterly alone (that maybe if you’d just- fucking hung around a bit more you somehow could’ve reversed her fate)— has obviously affected you as much as it has your stepfamily if not more- considering they were the ones who found her and all. But the twins, and even their father, are demonstrating a master class in composure, and you don’t know whether to find gratitude in their lack of flying off the handle (in this hell, someone needs to remain coolheaded) or be offended by it.

It almost feels like she was never here.

Like nothing went wrong... But you can’t really blame them for their cool and collected behaviors, because you’re putting up a strong front yourself.

Maybe your mother wasn’t the twins’ given at birth, sure... But they operated as a true family. Even when you were bitter and stuck-up and rude, the four of them were tight-knit, so much so that eventually you felt like the fucking interloper in it all, the outlying number in the equation.

So you quietly understand that there’s hurt involved on their side around her death- whether they’re being loud about it or not- and choose not to tally it against them.

…Perhaps, you think, it’s high time for you to retire your childhood grudges, anyway.

You close the book, smoothing over the cover.

If the five-second rule applies— you use four and a half to pick up your pieces off the floor and formulate a reply, not hiding how crestfallen you are.

“No. I… I haven’t even went shopping yet. I mean, I figured-“

A thick swallow on your end- and an exhale that sounds more like the stirrings of a panic attack and the boys are at your side in a moment. Their softer facets coming through as they join you on the loft window.

Luke takes the worn stuffed animal he almost crushes, dutifully ignoring its matted fur, and places it in your lap to distract you as you struggle to articulate your emotions. Kieran does his best to not scrutinize you too much, knowing you typically don’t like the attention, while you fidget with the plushie and give them an odd show of vulnerability.

I mean, fuck it. They see you as their sister, and you’re tired of pretending to be too tough to rely on them as your brothers, so—

“I- I figured we had two whole weeks, you know? And… And that’s plenty of time to just get a dress later. Have- Have you two gotten everything ready for it?”

“Yeah,” Luke murmurs back, taking your hand in his to swallow it up in warmth. It surprises you but you don’t make a comment. As if wanting to be included as well, or maybe he’s just mad his brother beat him to the punch, Kieran quietly nudges the plushie from your other hand and intwines his fingers with yours.

Your cheeks warm.

Your heart, ricocheting in your chest, whispers something you don’t quite catch as one of them sluggishly props his chin on your shoulder, mumbling a hey, it’s alright as you furiously blink, and you’re inundated with a foreign sense of- of—

Security? …Is that it?

“We went with dad yesterday to buy the suits.”

“Before he picked you up at the airport,” Luke clarifies in a light tone.

At your back, the sun glares over a chilly courtyard, lighting the fountain and iron-wrought gates with liquid, reflective gold. It only makes the near identical visages either side of you look all the more daring and impish— boyishly handsome— as dusk washes its hues over the three of you.

It’s just a little jarring.

A set of knuckles, almost experimentally, caresses your toasty cheek.

…For perhaps the first documented time in history, you don’t bite.

“We can take you, if you want? There’s a place in town that can tailor something perfectly for you. We can go tonight to get your measurements, sis, what do you think? Just get it done?”

It’s… not a bad idea. Far from it, actually.

You’d be able to quiet the restless part of your mind. Accomplish this seemingly easy task that’s become gargantuan in your head all within the span of just one night. To top it all off, it’d be with the added bonus of the twins’ brotherly support.

“A-Actually,” you start, lifting your chin to look at Luke, and then Kieran, voice thin, “I was, um, wondering if you two could take me somewhere else.”

They wait, owlish.

You meekly continue, “I’ve already read all the books I have here. I was thinking if you could drive me to that store downtown, just so I can pick up a few. Something to, um, fill in the time while I’m here, you know?“

Kieran blinks at you, dark eyes examining your face carefully, like he’s taking it in in a new light. You’re sure they don’t know what to make of you right now: for most if not all of your teen years, you played the part of distant stepsister very well, never wore your emotions on your sleeve and hesitated to be open with any of the members of your stepfamily.

Perhaps they think you’re taking a page from their book— setting them up for some grandiose joke so you can cackle in their faces.

Luke, smiling faintly, nudges your shoulder with his and leans in. “Sure, sis. Me and Kieran will take you. I guess you haven’t changed too much while you’ve been gone, huh? You’re still a big bookworm.”

“A big nerd.”

“Alright, you two,” you chuckle lightly, jabbing them both playfully- to which they both offer up a fake, dramatic grunt of pain to- before wiping the tear that almost beads at your eye. You hope they don’t notice. But if they do, they don’t make any sly remark about it. For that you’re thankful.

It seems you’ve all matured quite a bit since pre-adulthood, but it’s somehow more obvious this time around.

This visit is different from the last in more ways than one.

Looking between them both, hardly able to hold their respective gazes as your pulse swings in your throat— “Thank you”— you murmur, gentle.

For as embarrassing as it is to be vulnerable, you let yourself be just a little sweet with them... Considering your mother is gone, and the unsteady grounds you stand on with Sylus especially- the veritable owner of this home- you think you’re less of an inhabitant here and more of a… guest.

Once these two weeks are up and the funeral concludes, you’ll be going away again. Probably for the last time. Nothing will call you back.

(You’d been such a brat. What would want to?)

The twins, unable to hide the little, genuine smirks rippling across their faces, regard you inquisitively when something like sadness flashes across your gaze.

You clear your throat. That thought of finally escaping your stepfamily- your stepfather and all he represented- for good shouldn’t make something in your heart tremble. But oh, it does.

Politely, you brush off their hands and rise to your feet. You’re not sure what’s gotten into you, but you plaster on an awkward yet no less friendly smile and cross your arms.

“So, boys? You ready to go now? Or…?”

Kieran, the utter moron he is, comments something about how he was born ready, jumping up, and then they’re ushering you out the door and into the hall, towards the stairs, in a two-person stampede.

✦

You buy a book.

Three, for good measure, each thicker than the one before. Just something to occupy your mind in the windows of silence you’ll no doubt spend idling around the mansion before the ceremony.

On the way back, the sky is black underneath a cladding of clouds. Ash as far as the eye can see. The stars are hiding, but you lean your cheek against the car window and look up as if trying to spot them, anyway.

Lost in your mind, your own musings holding you close as the bag sits atop your lap, you don’t pay much attention to the boys when they ask if you wanna stop somewhere to eat because they’re getting munchy.

Without looking, though, you do tell them ‘no thanks, you’re getting kind of sleepy’ and Kieran makes the turn home— albeit not without a dramatic sigh.

It’s… pleasant though, surprisingly. Being with them.

It’s like luck is finally shuffling over to your side. Like things are finally looking up- no matter how trife or trivial they seem. For as shitty of a week it’s turned out to be, you need all the silver linings you can get. So (although with some reluctance, some… confusion) you’ll count this time with them as a small blessing.

Maybe, just maybe, this impromptu trip to Linkon is finally taking a turn for the better. Maybe each and every one of your efforts to remain patient and open-minded and mature with your stepfamily have actually begun to pay off. Maybe you won’t be tearfully pulling hair from your scalp after all, driven mad.

The twins’ harmless griping is a backdrop you smile at as the gates of the estate come into view through the woody road.

In the warmer seasons, it’s a monolithic modern thing erected atop rolling lawns striped green. As it stands now, though, the courtyard is a dull, frosted sage, quiet and cold. The fountain will need to be turned off soon before everything freezes, before the snow comes. You vaguely wonder if one of the workers or bush trimmers that come along every week or two will remember before Sylus even gives them the order. It’s likely.

A thud. “Are you sure, sis?” Your door closes behind you.

Hand still on the wheel, Kieran waggles his eyebrows as his sibling hollers from the passenger seat, thinking you’ll take his lilts as an invitation to get back into the vehicle.

“I’m sure,” you murmur fondly, actually stopping at the driver’s window for a moment to hear them out. You adjust the plastic bag in your grasp and throw a look down the rest of the driveway, towards the house.

“You want us to bring something back, at least? We found this cool new place that opened up that has the best—“

A chuckle. “I’m alright, really. We had lunch and dinner together, ‘member?” Then, you give your throat a soft, innocuous clear, scuffing your shoes over the pavement. “By the way, uh… Do you think your dad’s home yet?”

With the garage closed, the path empty and only the lights you left on in the house warmly shining through, it’s hard to tell if anybody else has come by.

Kieran actually snickers at your hesitance, the little bastard.

You reach forward to flick his forehead and he reels away with an excited shout. “Calm down, sis, I didn’t even say anything!”

“Yeah, but I see you laughing you dummy-“

“It’s just cute, is all. You’re always so worried about our old man and what he’s up to.”

You huff at that, maybe even visibly fluster. But before you can say anything, hop to your own defense, a puckish voice overlaps yours. “If you were in a cartoon, you’d have steam coming out of your ears right now.”

“Ugh! You two are unbearable-!”

“Hey, Kieran said it, not me-“

“But you thought it, didn’t you? You two share the same handful of braincells after all!!”

They both laugh, more endeared by your insults than offended- much to your dismay- and you put your tongue in your cheek. Your narrowed eyes drift back to the titanic of a home. Maybe it’s your imagination, but you almost swear you see a shadow flutter by one of the floor-to-ceiling windows on the bottom level and—

“Did you see that?” You untuck your arms from their weave at your chest and squint. The boys, still sniggering, follow your gaze. “I think he is home.”

A beat of silence passes.

You turn over. Luke faces ahead in his seat, wetting his lip wordlessly, but Kieran dangles his arm out the side of the fancy, sleek car (that his father surely bought for him as a toy) with his eyes set on you.

Holding your gaze with a shake of his head, his smirk is a tenuous thing, but it’s there. “Nah, I’m pretty sure he’s gone, sis.”

If you ever write a guide on surviving the Qin family, the first page would say: step one, do not believe the twins if they utter anything even a stone’s throw from the two words—

“Don’t worry.”

You frown, uncertain.

He laughs at your pouting. “Kieran- just tell me the truth-“

“I’m serious! He’ll be back later tonight, probably midnight. You know how it is. His schedule is spotty.”

A wind sweeps through and you shiver ever so slightly, clasping either of your arms as you hug them close to your body. Your lips are getting that uncomfortable dry feeling but you know it’ll only worsen if you run your tongue over them. So you don’t.

You eye the lavish, yet unassuming front of the home, ruminating. “Kieran-“

“Now go back in before you catch a cold. Dad will really kill me and Luke if he finds out you were standing out in the dark just to bicker with us.”

“I’m innocent in this,” his brother murmurs before exaggerating a yawn.

You analyze the crafty duo one more time before sensing no dupe on their end and sighing, marching up towards the house.

“Fine,” you call over your shoulder, just a little testy. You don’t want to be fooled, but there isn’t a big reason for them to lie about whether their dad’s returned or not- and even if he did make it back already, it’s no major thorn in your side. There’s a fat chance you’ll just casually, quietly, pass him by as you head to your room- and that’s even if you bump into him in the first place. The place isn’t exactly small or conducive to chance meetings.

“But if you’re lying,” you start, before blushing because you can’t quite think of a good threat. “You’ll- you’ll regret it.”

The engine purrs and the car pulls off- thank God- carrying the harmless yet bothersome mocking words of your stepbrothers with it. “Ohhhh so scary! See you later!”

You cluck your tongue, shaking your head at no annoyance of theirs in particular as you hop up the steps and fish for the key in your pocket.

Giggling under your breath. Idiots.

✦

You’re not giggling when you enter the open foyer, locking the door behind you, and spot a figure in the living room, splayed out on the large L-shaped sofa.

No, you’re not even thinking about the boys anymore, just the dilemma laid out before you as you press your lips together in a thin line and turn your feet into feathers to begin making your way through.

God’s hand must be over your life though, because upon closer, very furtive inspection, tiptoeing towards the archway, he’s…

Asleep.

You let out a soundless sigh of relief at that, shoulders slumping.

…And you should take the opportunity- glad it’s even come to you- and go, you know. It’s as good a moment as any to slip off, undetected, and retreat into the privacy of your bedroom.

It’s all but waiting for you.

What you told the twins was as much of a truth as it was a good excuse— you’re tired and it’s encroaching on that time where you want to plop into bed and curl up under the covers.

Not because it’s past your curfew or anything, no- honestly, you usually have a penchant to stay up late- but because you’re still a little jet-lagged from the flight and you’d prefer to sleep instead of loaf the evening through with the unwanted company of whatever thoughts that might creep in.

You’re not… incredibly close with Sylus. Unbidden feelings of safety and peace in his presence nudged aside, you’re not chummy with the guy and you really have no reason to stick around especially when you’re growing tired but—

Approaching the archway, you slowly reach a hand to rest on it, and you watch.

A half-touched mug of coffee sits on the table before the couch. Strewn beside it is his laptop, mousepad and mouse, and one of those yellow, lined notebooks that you quirk a brow at only because it’s deceptively cheap for a man so expensive.

It’s closer to something your own father- your real, now deceased one- would use to mark out measurements for his woodworking projects, or keep on the fridge under a magnet as a note to himself.

…Huh.

A mite amused by the sight of your generally very awake, proactive stepfather, you fight off a grudging smile- all too entertained by the languid display- and rest your shoulder against the wall.

Dim, golden lights fall over him in a gentle haze, but the shadow cut by his bumped nose is sharp.

You know they’re not related, Sylus and his unruly sons. The twins are splitting images of each other, but they mirror nothing of Sylus’s face— so when you heard the casual murmurs between him and your mother behind closed doors one evening about their ‘adoption’ long ago, you shouldn’t have been surprised. Yet you were.

For as much as you disliked him, it was never because he was a bad father.

The opposite, if you’re completely honest.

He’s always been good to the boys. Nothing short of nurturing (in his own indirect way, of course), paternal, and teacherly. Offering a hand of guidance where it was needed but never ironlike or suffocating with how he used it. If anything, he was even a smidgen lax with them- which you’d quietly admire but only in absolute secret.

Every parent has their faults, that’s a given.

Sylus had very little.

A head full of silver (and some grey, albeit it’s hard to notice his age just because he handles it so gracefully, so boldly) tipped against the back of the couch with an arm resting on the side of it- the shaggy throw blanket on his lap with the wintry chill kept in mind— he’s more than just peaceful. He’s…

Domestic. Relaxed.

This is his territory, you’re reminded again.

You’re just passing through it.

A five o’clock shadow dots the slant of his jaw. His lashes don’t even flutter in his sleep; you reckon he’s deep into it. A pen hangs between his fingers, limp.

Interest dashes through you as you quietly observe him.

You’re not… spying, per se, it’s just- You’re just curious, alright? And to be fair, he wouldn’t have any right to call you out on your observation even if he wanted to, because the number of times you’ve felt and ignored his patient, hopeful, or outright (for whatever reason) amazed stare is too high to be logged.

A pair of glasses rests on the tip of his nose, sloping off. There’s no way to tell just when he got home, but it’s obvious he had been hard at work with something on his computer.

Humming thoughtfully, you pull your gaze away before sluggishly pushing off the threshold.

You shake your head at yourself, readjusting your bag as you find the trace of humor in your desultory actions. Why you let your curiosity get the better of you, you don’t know. It’s very possible at this point that something’s possessed you. Either that, or your cold, guarded heart is thawing out at rates National Geographic needs to get an angle on ASAP.

In any case- you really ought to head up for bed now.

Quiet as a mouse, careful lest you wake and alert him to your presence, you pad behind the couch and across the width of the massive living room to the just as opulent stairs.

You look up to them—

Looming. Dark.

In your mind’s eye, so unrealistically steep- so dangerous—

Breath suddenly hitching, you glance down to your feet, planted firmly beneath you- unmoving- and remind yourself of good things. Other, things.

Puppies. Kittens. Rainbows with pots of gold waiting at the other end with leprechauns to greedily guard them- varying flights of fancy.

Awfully enough, in all your attempts to distract and soothe yourself, four portraits pop up into your brain and three of them belong to none other than your stepfamily.

You want to be callous. But it’s not working this time around.

This wound of yours that your mother’s death left behind is too open, too fleshy, for you to pretend that your skin is so hardened.

Reopening your eyes, you swallow down the bad gut feeling that twists like a knife- the inexplicable unease disappearing as quickly as it came- and reach a hand for the railing.

Bed. Bed. Clearly, you need the rest—

“Kitten?”

A groggy voice. That, and a shuffle.

You flip around.

You’re too shocked to even remember you’re meant to dislike him, hand flying over your heart in a trice. “Y-Yeah?”

Your stepfather, looking sideward over the couch at you, blinks away sleep casually.

Oh, God. It’s just him…

“Oh,” he mumbles, “Sorry, Sweetie. I didn’t mean to scare you…” lazily tossing a glance to the unoccupied space around him, even the banister overhead; checking for something, you realize as your heart slowly takes its foot out from your throat.

You sigh out, visibly deflating.

You think you see his gaze drop to the bag in your hand, giving you a once-over, but his ruby eyes are catching the light in a way that makes it near impossible to discern. You can only tell he’s looking at you because he’s facing you.

“Where’s the boys? You left with them, didn’t you?”

Your lashes bounce against your cheekbone, rapid as you collect your bearings. “Oh, they…”

His tone gets a little stern, then, his eyes a little clearer now as he dips his chin and quirks a searching brow. Incredulous, very. “Is… everything alright? They behaved themselves, didn’t they?”

“Yeah, no- the boys were fine,” you shake your head, rubbing nothing from your eye. Fatigue, maybe, as it drapes itself over you. It takes a second for you to remember the events that led you here before opening your mouth to speak on them. “Um, they just wanted to get a snack and I wanted to be dropped off, so…”

He takes a moment to ponder that.

Unconvinced, “But everything went well?” His attention skims over you hastily. You see that, now. The intense glitter in his eye, wholly transfixed, as the dregs of his slumber wear off- however, the gravel in his voice is more stubborn to go.

He sighs, long-suffering. “You can tell me. I won’t let them know it was you.”

You struggle to imagine how that would go, but shake your head in the next moment anyway.

“Really, it was fine. Everything went well.”

“Good.” He hums, then, seemingly satisfied.

He pores over you, curious all over again as a tiny bunch forms between his brow, wrinkling it slightly. “You’re… heading up for the night now, I guess?”

Oh, yes actually, you think to yourself in time with his reminding you of it- but you go to reply and hold off on it when he glances down at what you correctly assume to be his wristwatch, pausing thoughtfully.

“Oh, my. It’s gotten pretty late out now,” he drawls. “Hm. I must’ve drifted off while I was waiting for-”

You quirk a brow. “Ah. Waiting for this spreadsheet to get interesting,” he smoothly chuckles, looking at the screen of his computer and the low battery sign that pops up as a window on it.

Before you can think to respond- “Goodnight then, Kitten,” he lilts as high as his sleep-addled voice will allow, “I’ll see you in the morning. Should I,” a pause again, “wake you for breakfast?”

You swallow, momentarily glancing at the top landing of the stairs. “No thanks.”

“Are you sure?” He breathes.

Persistence is needed in business, you know that; it’s why you don’t hold it against him when his first instinct is to push rather than pull away. His realm is different than yours. And anyway, he’s just being polite— playing the part of the concerned, doting, yet nonetheless hesitant stepfather who is terribly uncertain with how to best handle his grouchy stepdaughter. He does it well.

“You’re not afraid of missing out?”

You offer a mildly amused huff, choosing to indulge him just this once- just for these two weeks. “On my sleep, maybe.”

He chuckles. It’s a full and rich sound. There’ll come a day where Luke and Kieran will coax more of the same out of him, and you’ll give them genuine, congratulatory claps on the back each for the achievement.

For now, though, that feat is yours and yours alone. Not that you’re… exactly proud of it.

“Alright, alright, I get the hint, little miss night owl… I won’t disturb you tomorrow. You have my word.” He smirks just barely. Just safe enough.

“Sleep tight, Sweetie.”

The ice is melting between you both, yes- a phenomenon you both curiously, warily observe— but he will watch his step.

You set your foot on the first stair, “T-Thanks. You too.”

…As will you.

tags: @leftpoetrymoon @valhalla-soulstealer @gingybimby @crowsandapples @novthirty @mcdepressed290 @jadeloverxd @satansdaughter123 @blitziwitch @luminaaaz @eialovescats @noliniodeaes @dramaticalsachan @loudhologramturtle @softiepeachess @reni502 @datfangirl @lilyalone @thatsbunnysmind @lioria @floooring @babyx91 @rosie279 @calistaxoxo24 @kingheinrey @msturi2u @theplaid-wearingmoose @blueseachelle @themonotonysyndrome @crazyartist0001-blog @librarydame @deathlycrow @whdhjfjvjvjfjdhsj ✦ ask to be added to taglist! please just have an age in ur bio (17+) ✨likes & reblogs are super appreciated my friends🫰thank u again for the support thus far!! C:

read part 3 here

[luvingjeanie]

streamerboyfriend!yuji

non-sorcerer!au, yuji is not a vessel, he’s just a goofy guy

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

streamerboyfriend!yuji who began streaming as a silly little past time, and jumped up at his first donation, urging people to NOT send him money because he felt bad

‘nonono, wait, can i send this back?!’

‘i mean thank you so much but i don’t want you guys to send me money pls i don’t need it :(‘

‘babe they’ve started sending me money i feel bad!’ to you after he’s finished his most watched stream yet, brown eyes all soft and wide as he whined to you about how sweet his fans are!!

streamerboyfriend!yuji who looks confused after checking his analytics for the first time after he gradually got bigger, realising that like, nearly 80% of his viewers are female.

not that he minds, he just doesn’t know why it’s such an insane amount of teenage girls watching him

‘oooo’ *slowly nods* when you tell him it’s because they find him cute

streamerboyfriend!yuji who is always a little too loud and excitable when interacting with chat, a lazy, boyish grin crinkling his eyes as he laughed unabashedly at the jokes made by his fans, calling you over to read what had been said so you could laugh together.

streamerboyfriend!yuji nearly screaming at a jumpscare in some indie horror game his chat DEMANDED he play, but he clamped his hand over his mouth last minute because you were sleeping and he doesn’t want to wake you

streamerboyfriend!yuji doing extra long charity streams, which is the only time he’s truly comfortable with people sending him money.

to get extra money donated for the charity he lets his chat suggest stupid challenges when they donate.

one of them was pouring a full packet of the buldak ramen hot sauce in his mouth, he accidentally rubbed his eyes after and he screamed SO loud you thought he got shot or something

it got clipped and somehow became a viral tik tok sound. it kills him to this day

streamerboyfriend!yuji who grinned so so so wide and cute the first time you came on stream, it was an accident. you just went into his streaming/gaming room to ask him something and his chat went FUCKING crazy!

‘oh!!! this is my girlfriend y/n!!!’

‘babe say hi!’

streamerboyfriend!yuji who doesn’t always do gaming streams, and sometimes just does chill reaction streams, or you laugh you lose ones with his friends.

the viewers send in the videos, and he always cackles over fucking everything. bro ALWAYS loses

one viewer managed to find an old musical.ly of his from when he was like twelve and he just gawked then hid his face in his hands. genuinely nearly had a nervous breakdown he was so embarrassed

streamerboyfriend!yuji who eventually convinces you to come on stream sometime for silly little those reaction streams or to play cute couples games like it takes two

these streams always get clipped and people make those cutsey little edits on tik tok

he saw one edit that used ‘love me not’ by ravyn lenae and reposted that shit IMMEDIATELY and then showed it to you

streamerboyfriend!yuji who softens up on the streams he does with you. he’ll poke fun and joke with anyone he streams with BUT you. bro is just a sap. he lets you make fun of him but won’t say anything back, he’ll just giggle and nod his head, agreeing

will remove an eyelash from your face and gets you to make a wish, or fixes your hair when it gets messy from the spare headset he has for you

his chat calls him whipped but also, as you can guess, clips these moments and uses them in their edits😭

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

A Changed Future (1): Yandere Isekai 

When you woke after an especially tiresome day the last thing you’d expect was to reawake in a room that looked nothing like your own

The house, the neighborhood, your job everything was not your own

Instead, it’s resembling a webtoon you remember seeing the marketing, edits, and spoilers for

And if it was all adding up right you’d find the horrifying truth behind the controversial protagonist of the story would be incredibly true

“Look I’m sorry I yelled…I love you…I’m really hungry. Can I eat today?”

The beautiful and practically perfect protagonist was the one who trapped their love interest inside their–now your basement

Chained to the floor on a chair in the dark with unfinished surroundings was the poor victim of the yandere protagonist

Haruko, is an average guy who previously caught the protagonist’s attention by standing up to one an influential pair of elitists in defense of their crush but that’s hearsay

In the former protagonist's atmosphere the children of the rich were victims to their family’s whims often protecting their wealth rather than their children

Which caused Haruko to defend his friend from their overbearing parents

That is when the protagonist suddenly fell deeply in love with the average fellow 

Obsessively stalking him and eliminating their rivals by any means necessary

finally snatching their love and running to a small little home where they planned to have their dreamy life 

Of course, after breaking his spirit and having Haruko develop some kind of stockholm syndrome

To find that you’ve been isekai’d is jarring 

But being a protagonist that had the internet raving for years about how unhealthy they were is awful

But it was nothing when you were standing at the top of the stairs and watching the malnourished man call out to you

“Yeah….sure.”

Naturally you calm down, enough to make the poor guy something to eat and drink

Excusing yourself to have a breakdown in the bathroom before coming up with a plan to fix it all

“Y-you’re letting me go?”

“Yes, I won’t stop if you want to go to the police…but I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t.”

You felt so selfish 

But you weren’t the one who imprisoned him

Now that you were though you were going to turn a new leaf

After feeding him, clothing him, and giving him a hefty sum from the protagonists savings 

You go to their place of work where they’re in line for a promotion

“I quit.”

“E-excuse me (L/n)?! But your about to become the vice president of the company!?”

“I know. Sorry?”

You almost feel bad turning down the CEO who visits to try and reason with you

In your opinion, the protagonist didn’t deserve any of their success

They technically didn’t need it because they were stacked

Same could be said for the detective thats been constantly asking the protagonist questions

“You are actually agreeing to talk with me?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you hit your head?!”

With the knowledge from spoilers and ads you’d seen, you knew that the worst part of this story is that the protagonist is doing just fine while Haruka continues to struggle with his captivity and manufactured feelings

You want to do this right, whether you were meant to live in this world from now on or would one day return to your own

But in the meantime you’d do what you felt was right 

Turning their life—now your life around to somehow try to condone for all the crimes they’ve done

Unfortunately, though things don’t seem to want to go your way

“Please Please take me back!” 

“What?”

“You heard me! You were right you’re the only one who loves me! I love you! Please! Please! Take me back in your basement!”

“Okay?”

It seems that once you released the poor guy he returned to society

Expecting to be welcomed by his friends and family upon being missing for years

Who instead had moved on or had benefitted from him being declared dead

He tried to go back to working but he couldn’t get you out of his head

Not the one that ranted about adoring him and the one that would go days without feeding him

But the one that cried when you saw his skin bruising in his chains

The one that fed him a hot meal 

The one that helped him relearn to use his weakened legs

The one that keeps apologizing for every little thing you do

That’s the you, he likes

And he’d much prefer he turn back to being a victim trapped in your basement if it meant having you back in his life

“I don’t mind if you stay here if you need but I’m not keeping you trapped here. I won’t do it anymore.”

He cries and bangs his hands on the floor when you officially tell him

But he’ll take you up on your offer to move in with you

“Good morning (Y/n)! Since you quit your job you’re getting up so much later now. You’ve got to be careful waking too late.”

“Uhm how do you know I quit my job?”

“Unless you're locking me in the basement you don’t need to know!~”

He’s like a weird roommate who occasionally asks that you restrain him in some way

Purposefully rummaging in your storage to find ropes that you haven’t thrown away yet or buying them himself and leaving them out

“Ooops~! I did leave a chain out while cleaning! I’m so bad, being so careless even though you’ve been so against it. I should be punished! I know, you should tie me up! Right? Right? Right?”

He’s going insane everytime you refuse his demands to be locked away

You’re even sweeter now that he’s not locked away and that’s not helping

He’ll ultimately decide he should try it

“Hey (Y/n)?”

“Yes?”

“You still feel guilty about what you did to me right?”

“...Yes.”

“Then how about you do something for me? To make up for it?”

Even if you know you’ve done nothing wrong 

The guilt doesn’t stop you

Letting him lock you in the basement as he repeats some of the same punishments he remembers

Or rather tries to

“I just can’t seem to stand being away from you for a day, let alone not feed you then. I have no idea how you did it.”

You couldn’t be sure either

Which is why you don’t protest as his actions tend to get a bit more…wild

“Like you suggested I did try going for that new job again.”

“Uh that’s good.”

“I know since you’ve left they seem to be desperately searching for extra hands. I’d feel bad for them if you weren’t with me!”

“Right…”

“But being away from you all day is killing me! Maybe I should look for a more remote position.”

He treats you better than the former protagonist did 

Quickly moving you up to your old room and just chaining you there

But he wants more from you 

More Kisses

More Cuddles 

More Romance 

More Touching

More Quality time

He takes up so much of it, that the same problems that happened in the webtoon were happening again

Except this time it was related to you

“I’m Revmere the CEO of the Revere Co. I’m wondering is (Y/n) home? I’ve been trying to reach them by phone but it hasn’t been going through.”

“And I’m Detective Cape. Thomas Cape, I also need to speak with (Y/n) and you too if that’s alright Haruko.”

Part 2: Here

[thewriteadviceforwriters]

📉 The 5 Worst Writing Advice Bits You Might Still Believe

(Let’s Burn Them Together)

You’ve been lied to. Or at least, misled by well-meaning chaos goblins with strong opinions and a Twitter account.

Here’s a lovingly aggressive breakdown of writing “advice” you need to kick into a volcano immediately:

─────── ✦ ───────

“Write Every Day or You’re Not a Real Writer”

🗑️ Into the fire it goes.

This is advice built for guilt, not creativity. You’re a writer if you write. That includes:

Writing on weekends.

Writing in your Notes app once a week.

Writing one scene per month.

Thinking intensely about a story while doing literally anything else.

Consistency helps, sure. But daily output? Not the only path. And definitely not a moral obligation.

✨ Alternative: Write when you can, track what works, and let your process breathe.

─────── ✦ ───────

“If You’re Stuck, You Just Don’t Want It Bad Enough”

This is the kind of advice that sounds motivational until it destroys your relationship with writing.

Being stuck doesn’t mean you’re lazy or not passionate. It could mean: → You’re burnt out. → Your plot needs restructuring. → Your brain is full of static. → You’re scared to get it wrong.

✨ Alternative: Ask what your block is protecting you from. Then fix the problem, not your willpower.

─────── ✦ ───────

“Kill Your Darlings”

Yes, let’s just delete everything with emotional weight and pretend that makes it deep.

Look, editing matters. But this advice gets misused constantly. Killing your darlings doesn’t mean gutting every beautiful or weird or vulnerable thing in your prose. It means cutting what doesn’t serve the story.

✨ Alternative: Kill what doesn’t carry weight. Keep what resonates. Be ruthless with purpose, not performance.

─────── ✦ ───────

“Avoid Adverbs at All Costs”

This one was born in grammar hell.

Adverbs aren’t the enemy. Lazy adverbs are. But you know what else is lazy? Blanket bans. Adverbs can tighten a sentence, clarify emotion, or give rhythm when used intentionally.

✨ Alternative: Use adverbs when they do something specific. Don’t fear them, control them.

─────── ✦ ───────

“Your First Draft Has to Be Good or Don’t Bother”

This one? Evil.

It’s the fast track to perfectionism paralysis. First drafts aren’t supposed to be good. They’re supposed to exist. You can’t fix a blank page. You can fix a bad one.

✨ Alternative: Let your draft be messy. Be cringe. Be excessive. You’ll sculpt later. Right now? Just build the block of marble.

─────── ✦ ───────

Final thoughts from your local chaos scribe:

→ You don’t need to suffer to earn the title “writer.” → Your process is allowed to look different. → You are not broken because someone’s advice didn’t work for you. → Not everything that sounds “productive” is healthy. → Burn the rulebook. Build a toolkit instead.

—rin t. // writing advice that doesn’t suck™ // thewriteadviceforwriters

[h0useslut]

the silver lining’s i’ll be there with you ˙⋆✮

part one | series masterlist | masterlist

pairing : aaron hotchner x fem!bookstore owner!reader

w/c : 2,2k

warnings : age gap, anxiety attack, emotional distress, physical touch for comfort, soft!aaron, mutual pining, light drinking (wine), kissing

summary : a thunderstorm, a breakdown, and aaron hotchner’s arms around her. later, at readers bookshop anniversary, he’ll show up late - holding a first edition of her favourite book and a kiss she didn’t dare hope for

The lights had gone out.

You were in your bookstore with Aaron. Alone. And the lights had gone out amidst a thunderstorm.

It felt foolish now, being afraid of thunderstorms. But you couldn’t help it.

“Hey, Y/N…It’s okay. Everything is fine” He said softly, sensing your distress.

But little did he know, your lips were trembling. Your eyes were clouded with tears, and each lightning strike made you involuntarily flinch.

“It’s going to be okay. Can you take a step towards me?” He coaxed, wanting to help you out.

You mustered up a small nod, and then cursed quietly, realising he couldn’t see you. Stupid, stupid.

You took a cautious step, but in the process, a few books fell behind you. The cry that you’d tried so hard not to let out, came out raw and barely audible.

But he’d caught it.

“Sweetheart, shh. It’s okay. Okay, okay I’m coming to you, alright?”

You heard him move, shoes against the wooden floor making your breath hitch.

“I’m right here” He reminded you. “Don’t be afraid, I’ve got you” he said softly, just a few feet away from you now.

His arms wrapped around you, hesitantly. Only when you leaned into his embrace did he pull you closer.

Your tears fell faster than you could sniffle them in. And you couldn’t stop them. It was like you were little again, curled up on under the covers to shield yourself.

Holding you felt natural to him, as if you were a puzzle piece missing from his life. You fit so perfectly. His hand came to cradle the back of your head, fingers threading through your hair.

Aaron’s chest was warm, steady. An anchor holding you down when everything else was falling apart.

“I’m so- so sorry” You whispered, voice breaking. “Don’t know why- Don't know why I am like this”

“No, no shh,” He murmured. “You don’t have to explain. You’re allowed to be scared”

That was what unraveled you. He didn’t try to fix it, didn’t ask why. He just held you, let you break. Even though he didn’t know you well - at least not yet - he made you feel safe enough to fall apart.

More tears fell down your eyes, body trembling in his hold. You hadn’t meant to cry like that in front of him. Like you were some petulant child scared of thunder.

Aaron never pulled away. He held you closer, not shushing you. Not telling you it’ll pass. He simply held you, reminding you every now and then that he was there and that he had you.

At some point, the lights flickered on. The thunderstorm had faded into distant rumbles, but you hadn’t even noticed.

Still tucked into his arms - Aaron whispered to you,

“It’s okay, look. The lights are back on”

You pulled away, blinking back tears as you took in the soft lights illuminating throughout the room.

His hands came to rest on your arms, noticing you were still shaking.

“Come on, let’s sit down. You’re shaking” Aaron said, like it physically pained him.

You barely registered the fact that he had helped you sit down on one of the bean bags, pulling you under his chin. His scent filled your nostrils, grounding you.

You curled up at his side instinctively, legs over his lap, one arm draped across his chest like you were afraid he’d vanish.

Then quietly, almost like he didn’t want to break the spell - he picked up your worn-out copy of Pride and Prejudice that you’d dropped earlier.

“Pride and Prejudice” He said out loud. Aaron had seen you one too many times reading that book, and if you weren’t reading it, it was behind the counter.

“Oh, the pages are falling out,” He said softly, the small rumble of his chest making you feel calmer.

“Yeah, it’s… I’ve had it since I was 16” You admitted.

“That’s not too long” He teased.

You chuckled, a wet and breathy sound coming out. And then you felt it.

A soft kiss to your forehead, followed by the soft turning of pages.

Aaron’s voice came next, his voice a low and soothing murmur in your ear.

“It is a truth universally acknowledged…” he began, “that a single man in possession of good fortune must be in want of a wife”

And just like that, with your heartbeat slowing and his voice filling the space around you, both the storm outside and inside you finally began to settle.

When you woke up, you were surprised to find him still holding you, his big hand stroking your hair gently. He hadn’t let go.

“You fell asleep, sweetheart” Oh, there he goes with the petname again. Making you melt.

“I didn’t want to wake you”

You smiled, eyes still puffy from all the crying you’d done earlier. “Thank you for staying… for being here”

“I’ll always be here”

True to his word, he was there. In every sense of his words. He came frequently, most times alone. Bringing coffee, pastries, and even lunch.

He never stayed too long or asked too much. But he always noticed. When you were overwhelmed, needed warmth, or when your hands trembled a little more than usual.

He remembered things. Your coffee order, the way you lit up a few candles and put on soft music before closing. How you giggled whenever he pulled you in his arms and swayed to the faint sound of Strangers in the Night by Frank Sinatra.

He never made a show of it. But his presence wove into your days, until you weren’t sure how you ever did them without him.

And now, a few months later, you stood in front of the shop mirror - adjusting the little ribbon on the back of your dress (or at least trying to) for the millionth time, heart hammering in your chest with something you didn’t quite know how to name.

Five years. Your cozy, lovely, and warm bookstore had made it five years. And tonight, everyone you loved was coming to celebrate it.

Well, almost everyone.

You didn’t expect him to show up - mostly because you knew how hectic his job was. You might’ve nervously rambled about the party and how you didn’t want him to feel pressured to come.

Not really good at playing it cool.

Because when you had said,

“It’s okay- It’s okay if you’re busy Aaron”

You didn’t know if you meant it. A part of you would be crushed if he didn’t come.

So you kept busy.

Rearranging the snack table, dimming the lights again and again, until you found yourself surrounded by friends, a few indie authors, and some frequent customers.

Everyone but him.

The shop looked beautiful. Warm and inviting. Fairy lights glowed along the shelves, people were laughing in the poetry section, and the smell of cinnamon pastries lingered in the air.

You smiled. You were proud. Hell, you should be proud.

But as more time passed and as people clinked glasses, making toasts to you, hugging you and congratulating you on your business - you kept thinking about him.

Aaron.

Tall, and charming Aaron Hotchner. Who once held you through a storm like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Pouring yourself another glass of wine, you barely heard the doorbell chime. Late. Subtle. Like it didn’t want to interrupt.

Why did you miss the door every single time he showed up?

But you turned - and there he was.

Wearing a dark suit, no tie, two top buttons loose from his white shirt. He carried something in his hand, small and carefully wrapped in a burgundy tape. You didn’t know whether to cry, run to him, or pretend that your heart wasn’t breaking open like a chapter you’d dog-eared one too many times.

The urge to run to him and kiss him was too strong, you might admit. And on top of that, white wine hits you like chemicals.

He looked at you like he was seeing you for the first time all over again.

“Hi,” He said quietly, like this wasn’t a room full of people. Like it was still just the two of you in the bookstore, with no one to bother you.

You opened your mouth to respond, but nothing came out.

So he took a step closer, holding out the small package. “I know I’m late” he murmured, tone apologetic. “I hadn’t forgotten about it. And I brought you something”

Looking down at the burgundy wrapped gift, - a book clearly. Your fingers unwrapped it carefully.

Pride and Prejudice.

He’d bought you a copy of Pride and Prejudice. Not just any copy.

A first edition.

Your breath caught. Your eyes flew to his.

Aaron only shrugged, a gesture that seemed so boyish coming from a man like him. “It’s not… not in the perfect condition, but I remembered you had yours since you were sixteen”

Tears pooled in your eyes.

Not because of the book. (well because of that too)

Because of him.

This.

“Aaron- This is-“ You sniffled, lips already trembling.

He saw the way your hands shook, and before you could speak again, Aaron reached out and pulled you into his chest.

You melted into him instantly.

His arms wrapped around you with practiced ease, like he’d done this a thousand times in dreams he’d never dare to mention. You pressed your cheek against his shoulder, the thunder of his heartbeat making you feel dizzy.

And then, like a secret only the two of you would ever know, he pressed a kiss just above your ear, soft as a feather.

“You look beautiful”

Your eyes fluttered shut, chest aching in the best kind of way.

Throughout the entire night, you kept staring at each other from across the room. Whether it was him admiring you as you chatted with friends, or you catching him thumbing through shelves as if he didn’t already own a hundred books. The glances lingered. You were in your element, glowing in the soft light of your bookstore, and he couldn’t look away.

And when the last guest filtered out and the front door clicked shut, the room felt still again. You were left standing across from him, just the two of you. Once more.

“So…” You trailed off shyly.

His eyebrows raised, and he looked at you with genuine curiosity.

You paced around the room, dimming the lights, picking up a bottle of wine and the forgotten box of pizza.

Placing everything on the floor, you took your heels off and gestured for him to come and sit with you.

“I think you would’ve left early. Or not show up at all” You admitted, glasses clinking as you poured.

Aaron gave a small shake of his head. “No, sweetheart. I wouldn’t miss this”

The answer, simple as it was - it made your cheeks heat again. You slid down further next to him, knees pulled to your chest.

“I still can’t believe you bought me that first edition,” you said, voice hushed now. “No one has ever… Done that”

“Y/N…” He whispered.

“No, I’m serious. No one has ever done something like that for me”

The room was silent for a moment. Not awkward. Just soft. Heavy with something unspoken.

“You deserved to be thought of”

You sipped on your wine, licking your lips afterwards. “You always say things like that when I’m least prepared”

Aaron smiled, that small and rare expression he wore when he was truly at ease. “Should I stop then?”

You looked at him, gaze steady now. “No. No, don’t stop”

And then silence again. This time, charged.

He was closer now - physically, emotionally, undeniably. And when your eyes met again, you weren’t so shy anymore.

“I was hoping you’d come,” you murmured. “Even though I told you that it would be fine if you didn’t”

Aaron’s voice was quieter this time. “I didn’t want to miss it. I didn’t want to miss you.”

You looked down at your lap, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. “Aaron, you’re making it really hard not to fall in love with you, you know”

He didn’t laugh.

Instead, he leaned in - noses brushing, his forehead resting against yours.

“Then don’t fight it, sweetheart”

That was all it took.

Your breath hitched, and before you knew it his lips were on yours. Warm, soft. Maybe a little reserved at first. Just like him, you thought.

You could get lost in his touch. In the way his hand found your waist, tugging you impossibly closer to him. Like he’d been waiting to do that for a long, long time.

“Aaron…” You whimpered between wet kisses, his name a prayer on your lips.

His hands gripped your waist, your hips - tugging and pulling you flush against him, mouth warm and insistent on yours like he couldn’t get enough.

To his horror, you pulled back all at once.

You were breathless, flushed. Pupils blown wide and the straps of your dress almost slipping from your shoulders.

Without a word, you stood.

He blinked up at you, confused. Until he saw you crossing the room, turning the lock with a soft click.

Then you turned back around, the dim light catching your face as you sat down at his level again.

Nothing else was said.

Not yet.

taglist : @novausstuff @iyskgd

[parkjihoonswifey]

hi sweets! I was wondering if you’d be interested in writing something about watching weak hero with actor!boyfriend jihoon. maybe about you tearing up or crying bc of how sad jihoon’s acting as sieun made you feel and jihoon’s reaction 🥹🥹 orrr perhaps watching weak hero with junyoung (seongje’s actor) and acting scared of him/sulking bc of how good his acting as seongje was!! entirely up to you of course no pressure :)

A/N: Sorry for all my lies💔 I will do junyoung version too🙏🏾

Title: Not supposed to cry

Pairings: Actor! Park Jihoon x Actress/Actor! GN! Reader

Warnings: crying, mentions of blood

You didn’t think it would hit this hard.

You’d seen the memes, the edits, the Twitter breakdowns. Everyone had said Jihoon’s performance in Weak Hero  was gut-wrenching, Oscar-worthy, life-ruining. And you’d believed them—he was your boyfriend after all. You’d always known how much depth he carried behind that cute demeanor.

But actually watching it? It was something else entirely.

You sat curled under the blanket beside him on the couch, the laptop propped on your thighs. Jihoon had begged you to watch it with him—even though you’d delayed it for months because "I don't want to see you bruised and bleeding and emotionally traumatized, thanks.”

But tonight, he’d finally worn you down.

And now here you were, trembling like a leaf in a storm, hands pressed against your mouth as Yeon Si-eun lay crumpled and bloodied on the floor, struggling to breathe, eyes flickering with rage and helplessness.

Your throat burned.

Jihoon peeked over your shoulder, eating popcorn like this wasn’t devastating.

You sniffled once. Then again.

He glanced at you, his face smug. “Are you… are you crying?”

You didn’t answer.

You couldn’t.

Because now the scene had shifted, and Si-eun was trying to fight alone again. Taking punches with a blank face. Eyes glazed. His voice trembling when he spoke. It hurt your heart. Even if it was a character, you imagine it as your boyfriend.

You hated this. You hated it.

You curled tighter into yourself, and the first hot tear slipped down your cheek.

Jihoon paused the episode.

Your chest hiccupped. “Why did you do that?! I was watching.”

He turned toward you, looking scandalized. “You’re seriously crying over me?”

“I’m not crying over you, I’m crying over Si-eun!” you burst out, wiping at your face. “Oh my God, I hate this show. Who let you act like that?! Why are you like this?!”

Jihoon gave a long, dramatic sigh and flopped backwards into the couch cushions, head tilted back like a prince. “Wow… dating someone so good at acting really does things to a man’s ego.”

“I’m not acting!”

“Oh no, of course not,” he said, grabbing a tissue and daintily dabbing your cheeks with it like you were a Victorian maiden fainting in grief. “This is pure, raw emotion. I’m so flattered.”

You slapped his arm half-heartedly. “Shut up. I’m mad at you. You didn’t tell me it was this bad.”

He chuckled, the teasing slowly melting from his expression. “Hey. I warned you. I said it wasn’t easy to watch.”

“I thought you meant like intense action, not emotional trauma with a banger soundtrack!”

Jihoon smiled softly, brushing a tear away with his thumb. “You really got all worked up over Si-eun.”

Your lip wobbled. “He just… he reminds me of you. How you used to be before you got into acting. Always quiet. Always thinking more than you said. Always trying to fix things alone.”

Jihoon’s fingers stilled.

He didn’t say anything for a second, and you almost regretted saying it.

Then he exhaled slowly, pressing his forehead to yours. “You were the first person I didn’t want to push away. Even when I was still learning how to let people in.”

Your eyes welled up again, and you shoved your face into his chest. “Why are you making me cry again?! This is so mean!”

He laughed, wrapping his arms around you and tugging the blanket tighter. “Okay, okay. No more trauma. Let’s just watch a dumb rom-com. Or one of those weird animal documentaries you love.”

“I do love the weird animal documentaries.”

“I know. You cry when the penguins lose their babies.”

“You said you wouldn’t bring that up again!”

Jihoon kissed the top of your head. “You crying over my acting is the highest compliment I’ve ever received, by the way.”

You mumbled something incoherent into his hoodie.

“What was that?”

“I said,” you looked up at him with narrowed eyes, “you still suck for not warning me how wrecked I’d be.”

Jihoon smirked. “If I’d warned you, you wouldn’t have watched it. And then I wouldn’t get to see you sobbing over my brilliance.”

“You’re impossible.”

“And you’re in love with me.”

You grumbled something about fragile egos and went back to snuggling into his side. He kissed your temple again, this time without a joke behind it.

The next episode started playing. You were already tearing up again.

Jihoon just pulled you closer

A/N: That is all. its short I know💔💔

[kaiowut99]

Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters GX Episodes 113-114 Subbed (Finalized) - Fixes/Edits Breakdown

Since it’s 2024 and Tumblr still has a dumb link limit in posts, I’ve made this separate post supplementing my 113-114 Release Post with my usual animation fix/edit breakdown for the interested, since I did still want to give folks a more visual idea as I’ve been doing. Details below the cut!

Fixes and Edits! (113)

As mentioned in the Release Post and highlighted here, I took the bio Echo sends Amon about O'Brien and translated it (even worked on a dub version for reasons, too). The text in the red box still couldn't be made out even with the clearer shot Zichs sent me, so that was left as-is.

As Amon works to sneak into the SAL research lab to find Cobra, he uses his special spy glass (scouter?) to identify the trip lasers set up around it; once he does, he says it's child play now that he knows about them, but as he narrows his eyes to smile and say his line, his head staying still, a quick flicker of shading pops up that doesn't last once he does. I fixed this using Photoshop to remove it, using Sony Vegas to mix the fixed frame into the footage.

Later, once Judai and the gang get to the ground floor of the giant area under the SAL lab, they all decide to split into two groups to find Cobra--as they head out, they all join a split-screen to "shout really loud at the same time," as the dub put it, but two of their splits start sliding into the shot a frame before the rest join. I fixed this in Photoshop to make them start at the same time by just holding the previous no-split frame over this one.

A bit later, on the Jim/Kenzan/Asuka side, as Karen starts to wiggle in response to a threat closing in, Jim gets Asuka and Kenzan to wonder why Cobra would hide in a place like this, saying that it's because of the natural defenses it has in place to keep intruders from getting too close--but the shot as he does so starts off with a few frames of Jim's open mouth from later in the shot being superimposed over the initial movement frames as he shifts his head downward to speak, in two of them over his closed mouth and in one with his mouth semi-open. Fixed the three movement frames in Photoshop, painting over his open mouth in the first frame, redrawing his semi-open mouth over the open mouth along with painting over it with skin in the second, and painting over the open mouth and redrawing his closed mouth in the third. (On the bright side, it does make you think of Jim with a mustache...)

During the eyecatch, as Judai slides across the screen towards the right, an odd coloring error happens along his shirt and left shoulder as some red lingers on it from the rapid pan across the screen. Fixed in Vegas by redoing Judai's pan across using a later frame, masking the final shirt and shoulder out on top of him.

Later, as the Judai/Satou duel gets underway, Satou starts by summoning his Scab Scarknight, but does so by playing his card upside-down on his Duel Disk. Fixed in AfterEffects by placing a proxy right-side-up as he plays it and lighting it up as the original card gets brighter, layering a green solid layer as a screen on top to retain some of the green coloring for part of it, then applied motion tracking to move it along the screen as it pans up to Scab Scarknight.

Right after #6, Judai stares Scab Scarknight and Satou down, noting mentally that he has zero ATK, but an error happens here as the light that should be in the orb on Satou's Disk is instead on top of his fourth Monster Zone where Scarknight would be. Fixed this first in Photoshop by first coloring in some red over the Disk orb, then by redrawing the fourth Monster Zone there, as well as coloring in some black over the lingering outer glow of the red light along Scarknight's leg; once that was done, I used AE to put the Scarknight proxy into place in that redrawn zone.

A few seconds later, Judai starts his turn and takes a look at his hand, but an error happens here as he has Sparkman there next to his Cocoon Larva; 114 would show that he instead has Spark Gun, as Sparkman gets summoned using Hero Signal (surprisingly, the dub missed this). Fixed for consistency using AfterEffects by placing a Spark Gun proxy there for a frame at the end of the panning on the shot, and also masking the edges of Featherman's card on top; once done, I took the frame into Photoshop, where I added more of an outline along the edge of Featherman's card for blending, then threw the final frame back into AE where I used motion tracking to re-do the panning and move the fix across the screen.

[split here due to Tumblr's dumb character-per-text-block limit]

(9) A bit later, as Satou uses Scab Scarknight's Scab Curse effect to snatch up Burstlady, we see Burstlady descending onto Satou's field, but two errors happen: 1) Burstlady's missing her shoulder strap, and 2) the Burstlady and Scarknight cards on Satou's Disk are black rectangles. Fixed the cards first using AE, slapping my Burstlady and Scarknight proxies into place and applying motion tracking to move them along the screen as the shot pans; once done, I exported that and grabbed the eight movement frames of Burstlady descending down, which I edited in Photoshop to add in her missing strap, and then mixed them into the footage using Sony Vegas by repositioning each frame as she descends and the shot pans.

(10) A bit later, Satou has Burstlady attack Judai, but there's a quick frame as she swings her arm around to fire her Burstfire where she's missing her shoulder strap connecting to her arm cuff. Fixed in Photoshop by adding it in, then mixing it into the footage using Vegas.

(11) After that attack drops Judai's LP, Satou sets a card and ends his turn, but Burstlady's missing her shoulder strap again. Fixed in Photoshop by adding it in, then mixing it into the footage in Vegas by masking the fix out over the shot.

(12) As Judai then starts his next turn, he looks at his hand as he considers that he can't take more attacks, but a repeat of #8 happens as he still has Sparkman next to Cocoon Larva. Fixed for consistency with 114 similarly to #8, applying a Spark Gun proxy in Sparkman's place in one frame after the pan across the screen, masking Featherman's card over it, and taking the frame into Photoshop to add an outline to the edge of Featherman's card border for blending; once done, I took the fixed frame into AE to then apply motion tracking to re-do the pan across the screen. (Side-note: motion tracking is proving to be really useful for these card edits!)

(13) As Satou tells Judai that Scab Scarknight will negate all Life-regaining effects, Judai slides in on a split-screen to react in shock, but Satou starts to move a frame before Judai's split starts to slide in. Fixed this in Vegas by just holding the frame prior so that his moving and Judai's split slide-in happen together.

(14) A few seconds later, Satou uses Demandman's effect to force Air Hummingbird into Attack Mode, but as Demandman's claws/grappling hooks? reach Air Hummingbird, we see his card on Judai's Disk shown as a black rectangle. Fixed this while prepping the preview for 113 in 112, using AE to add in a proxy over the black rectangle as Judai moves while the grappling hooks close in, masking in the cables to them over it as they wiggle around.

(15) After Demandman succeeds in putting Air Hummingbird into Attack Mode, Satou activates Scarknight's Scab Curse effect; as we get a long shot of the field, with Satou telling Judai that any Attack-Mode Monster must attack Scarknight, Burstlady's shown without her shoulder strap. Fixed using Photoshop to redraw it in, then masking in the fix over the shot in Vegas.

(16) A few seconds later, as Air Hummingbird flies over to Satou's field under the Scab Curse, we see Judai mouthing something but not audibly saying anything; if I had to guess, he was supposed to yell, "Air Hummingbird!", but they didn't have KENN record it (the dub also doesn't have Jaden saying anything, but they keep his mouth moving). Fixed this in Vegas by holding Judai's mouth closed, masking some of Air Hummingbird's wing as needed while he's moving past it. [add gifs]

(17) As Air Hummingbird descends onto Satou's field, an error happens with Burstlady, who's missing her shoulder strap but has her shoulder colored like it. Fixed this in Photoshop by first recoloring her shoulder to her skin color, then adding in the shoulder strap/arm cuff combo.

(18) In the preview for 114, as we see Satou reacting to an attack from Sparkman, he activates a face-down Trap, but for a few quick frames as he swings his Disk arm, he has Sparkman on his Disk where Burstlady should still be. Fixed this in 114 proper first and then applied the fix here, using AE to slap a Burstlady proxy into place for the frames needed, and applying motion tracking to keep it in place as one of the movement frames zooms out for three total frames.

Fixes and Edits! (114)

After being called out on his sleeping through class by Satou, Judai is taken aback, saying that he gets how bad that was, but doesn't see it as a big deal; Satou slides in on a split-screen to tell him it is important, but Judai moves and turns for the slide-in a few frames before Satou's split starts to slide in--fixed this in Vegas by making Satou start to slide in as Judai starts to move. Then, once Satou says that, he moves and "pushes" Judai off the split-screen, but a bit too much so as it turns out; Judai ends up quite separated from his split's border as Satou's side expands. Fixed this latter error in Vegas again, redoing Judai's split moving to keep his position steady.

After Satou notes that Judai should've been a role model for the Academia, Judai mocks the idea, saying that he just does what he wants, but Satou slides in on a split-screen to tell him that "great power comes with great responsibility--" but Judai moves a frame before Satou's split starts to slide in. Fixed this in Vegas by redoing Satou's slide-in to sync with Judai's moving. Then, after he says that, an error happens as the two start to split apart where Judai in his previous pre-split-out position is still behind them and not the shot of the field being transitioned to. Also fixed this in Vegas by masking in the next shot of the field between them.

A bit later, after Judai summons Sailorman, Satou takes his turn and has Burstlady attack him, but she's missing the shoulder strap part of her strap/arm cuff combo again. Fixed in Photoshop in one frame as she jumps up, adding in the strap, then in AE as I took that frame and applied motion tracking to move it upward into place before masking out the fix on top of the footage.

After the eyecatch, as Johan and Shou find out that the power's gone out (thanks to Amon), Johan resolves to meet up with Judai and find Cobra, but as he shifts his head down to smile, the light and dark parts of the one bang over his right ear shift places for the rest of the shot, while no other part of his hair changes. Fixed for consistency in Photoshop, editing the coloring on the bang to keep the shading on his right side as it had been.

Later, as Judai attacks with Sparkman, Satou moves to activate his face-down Victim Barrier Trap Card, but for a few frames as he swings his arm, we see Sparkman on his Disk where Burstlady should be. As noted for the instance in 113, I fixed this error here first, using AfterEffects to put a Burstlady proxy into place as needed.

A few shots later, once Burstlady takes the hit for Scarknight due to Victim Barrier's effect, Satou explains that it also activates Scarknight's Scab Curse effect, causing a black aura to swirl around him before he fires scabs at Sparkman, but the aura isn't fully drawn, stopping partway down Scarknight's legs and leaving no aura for the rest of the video frame. Fixed this in Vegas by slightly cropping the shot to crop out the part where the aura isn't drawn in.

A bit later, as Satou takes his next turn, he switches Scab Scarknight from Defense to Attack Mode, but the card on his Disk is already in Attack Mode; usually, with Mode-switches in GX, the card is still in the original Mode for the shot where it happens, and then it would be in the new Mode in subsequent shots. Accordingly, fixed this by first using Photoshop to blank that Monster Zone for the few frames it's visible in, then using AE to add a Scarknight proxy in Defense Mode.

[split here due to Tumblr's dumb character-per-text-block limit]

(8) Probably the big one here for me: after summoning Neos, Judai has him attack Scarknight, but Satou activates his face-down Scab Scream Trap Card, which [mostly unexplained] lets him send his Scarknight to his Cemetery to destroy Neos and summon Crying Scarknight, but after telling Judai that he won't lose to someone as bereft of darkness in his heart as he, the card we see glowing as its effect activates here is... Scab Scarknight? This actually should be Scab Scream, as I detailed here; I'm a bit surprised it wasn't caught for the DVD, and the dub didn't pick up on this either. After some research on trying to recreate the lighting effect on the card and some playing around, I fixed this using AE to put my Scab Scream proxy into place, applying a Light Rays effect and tweaking it some across a few layers to keyframe a glow along the middle of the card extending outward over the rest of it. Not as 1:1 a lighting/glow replacement as I'd have liked, but it works pretty well with the SFX here. Once I had the replaced card and extended glow worked on for the duration of the shot between it and the fade into Scarknight, I took it into Vegas where I faded in Scarknight by looping part of his shot and fading the card fix into it.

(9) A bit later, as Judai asks if Crying Scarknight is Scab Scarknight's true form, Satou slides in on a split-screen to confirm it--but as they split apart for him to explain how he would keep battling with everyone's hopes weighing on him, there's a quick frame as they start to where Judai's side doesn't get a border as he moves, and the next shot of Crying Scarknight being transitioned into doesn't start to appear between them; both are fixed as of the following frame. Fixed in Vegas by first redoing their split-screen to have Judai positioned where he is on his side as the split-out happens (given that the split-screen originally has him positioned a bit closer to the border, and as the split-out happens he's positioned a little further to the right and stays there as he slides out), then adding a border and masking in Crying Scarknight slightly as they begin their split-out.

(10) As we flash back to Satou dueling himself and his Crying Scarknight into exhaustion (one of their opponents looking like a recolored Ethan Shark from the KCGP in DM), there's a linear blur applied to the flashback around the video frame, but a few shots during it have that blur missing--namely, the shot of the one duelist in a green tux using King of Yamimakai backing up in fear as Satou summons Crying Scarknight, the shot as Scarknight destroys all of his Monsters, and then the shot later as a collapsed and now awake Satou looks around to see Scab Scarknight shielding him, and the last shot of the flashback zooming out on Scarknight. Fixed these four shots in Vegas by applying a linear blur along the edges of all four clips (by duplicating the clips into a second layer, applying the blur, and then cutting out the middle with a negative mask so that the unblurred layer under would appear).

(11) After the flashback, Judai summons his Cocoon Larva, setting a card face-down to end his turn, but as he moves his Disk to set his card, his Disk is incompletely drawn for the initial two movement frames as it comes into view, as the edge to Judai's left is missing. Fixed both in Photoshop by drawing that edge in, throwing the fixed frames into Vegas and mixing them into the footage by repositioning them as the screen pans.

(12) In the next-episode preview for 115, we see a clip of Johan getting into position to draw, but his third Monster Zone on his Disk isn't drawn in for the two movement frames we see it in (about 6-8 frames altogether), causing the whooshing background behind him to be visible there. Fixed in 115 proper first before masking in the fix here, using Photoshop to draw in the Monster Zone in the two frames needed, re-adding a faint red glow over the edit from the orb on Johan's Disk.

[dakusan]

I T ’ S 3 A M A N D T H E Y ’ R E T H I N K I N G O F Y O U

stray kids ot8 x reader | 3am chaos, lowercase love, snacks, stars & soft breakdowns

🌙 synopsis: It’s 3AM. You’re not the only one still awake. This is what they text you when they miss you most but don’t know how to say it. This is what 3AM feels like—when love is quiet, messy, and way too honest to sleep through.

💌 a/n: this post was written entirely on the floor. i became the 3AM i was trying to write about. i just think there’s something painfully romantic about someone texting you at the exact hour they should be asleep. like… you were the thought that kept them up. and they couldn't hold it in anymore. and now they’re sending you cat pictures and half-confessions and pretending it’s no big deal. please enjoy this emotional sandwich of memes, voice notes, and love disguised as “haha i’m fine” p.s. reblogs = psychic cuddles at 3:17AM p.p.s. if your bias ever actually sent you one of these, pls text me from the ER. i’ll meet you there. p.p.p.s. click n listen to the song if u wanna feel like the main character walking home alone at 3:17AM in slow motion… or don’t. whatever. love is fake anyway (jk it’s real and it’s this post)

���credits: @cafekitsune for the dividers

🎧 » Solitude — VX « 0:58 ─〇───── 3:16 ⇄ ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ ↻

Bang Chan // 방찬

☁️ 3AM version of him:

Hoodie on. Brain off.

Rerendering the same demo 5x while thinking about your last hug.

Says “you don’t have to reply” but desperately hopes you do.

Wants to call but stares at the screen instead. Imagines your voice like it’s a song he can’t write down.

💬 What he texts you:

[3:04 AM] “you up?” “i mean. obviously. you’re probably not. it’s 3” “but on the off chance ur awake and also not mad at me for being annoying at dinner” “i just wanna say” “i was editing that thing and ur voice popped into my head again” “not like, your real voice. more like the voice that lives in my memory of you.” “that sounded creepy. i’m tired. ignore me.” “unless you’re awake. then pls don’t ignore me.” “come over if u want. i’ll microwave something warm.” (1 audio note, 0:14) “this is the demo. it’s bad. but it has a little bit of you in it so. idk. maybe it’s good.”

🖋️ Mini fic:

The file keeps exporting wrong. That’s how he knows he’s tired — and thinking about you too much. He replays the chorus. Again. Hears your voice in the harmony he didn't layer. Hears your laugh in the quiet reverb at the end of the bridge. It makes his chest hurt in that annoying kind of way where he wants to hold you and apologize for nothing at the same time.

He types three messages. Deletes two. He shouldn’t bother you. But it’s late, and you’re the only thing keeping him company in his mind.

So he sends the demo. Then the texts. Then sits back in his chair, hoodie sleeves over his fists, hoping your “seen” turns into typing bubbles.

Just for a second. Just so he knows he’s not the only one lying awake with the memory of your voice playing on loop.

Lee Know // 리노

☁️ 3AM version of him:

Blanket burrito on the couch. TV is on but muted.

Has already gotten up twice to check that the door is locked.

His cats are all asleep and now he’s staring at the ceiling like it owes him something.

Misses you. Won’t admit it. Will passive-aggressively hint about it until you crack first.

💬 What he texts you:

[3:00 AM] “this cat’s expression reminded me of you” (photo attachment: Soonie looking Judgy™ in a blanket) “interpret that however u want” “also i’m not saying i miss you but i just looked at the empty side of my bed and got annoyed” “if ur awake say something” “if u’re not i’m going to call you rude in my head for the next 6 hours” “nvm. you’re probably sleeping. sleep well. i didn’t say anything. forget i texted.” (follows with a blurry mirror selfie in your hoodie captioned: “this doesn’t smell like you anymore. fix that.”)

🖋️ Mini fic:

He tells himself he’s not going to text you. He tells himself you’re probably asleep. That he’s fine. That the silence is nice.

So why is he still holding his phone?

He scrolls. Opens your chat. Stares. Then closes it. Then opens it again. He snaps a photo of Soonie curled up next to him, half-asleep with his face smushed into a blanket. Then he types: “this is you.” Deletes it. Types again: “he’s judging me for missing you.” Deletes that too.

Eventually, he just sends the picture. And a few sarcastic follow-ups that come out more honest than he meant. He doesn’t want to sound soft. He doesn’t want to sound clingy. But the bed feels cold. And you’re not there. And that hoodie you left isn’t cutting it anymore.

He stares at the read receipt when it pops up. Heart beating faster than it should. If you reply? He’ll pretend he’s annoyed. But he’ll smile. Real big. And probably get up to make sure the door’s unlocked — just in case. Just for you.

Changbin // 창빈

☁️ 3AM version of him:

Wearing a hoodie 3 sizes too big, hood up, socks mismatched.

Sitting on the kitchen floor with a snack he doesn’t want.

Tried journaling but ended up writing your name 6 times.

Missing you so hard it’s starting to piss him off.

💬 What he texts you:

[3:06 AM] “do u ever get hit with missing someone so fast u forget how to breathe” “bc i was literally just making toast and now i wanna hold ur hand like it’s the last one on earth” “ok that sounded intense. ignore that” “actually don’t ignore that. i mean it” “you make my brain stupid and my chest tight” “i should’ve kissed you one more time before u left” “if i send u a pic of my dumb face will u come back and kiss it??”

(photo attachment: selfie. hood up. pouty. eyes soft. captioned “emotional gym rat. missing u.”) (followed by a voice memo where he starts saying “i love—” and immediately cuts it off with a groan and a “NOPE okay goodnight”)

🖋️ Mini fic:

He’s not sure why it hits him when it does. He was fine all night. Played games. Did a workout. Ate something decent. Even cleaned. And then he passed by the sweater you wore last weekend — still folded, still smelling a little like your shampoo — and suddenly it’s like something cracked open inside him.

So now he’s on the kitchen floor. Sending texts at this god forsaken hour. Because everything feels too quiet and too full at once, and the only thing that would make sense is your head on his shoulder and your voice in his ear.

He types, deletes, types again. Sends a selfie before he chickens out. Then sits there for a while, just looking at the time tick by and wondering if you’re awake too. If you’re thinking of him.

Because he sure as hell is thinking of you. Constantly. All the time. And when he sees those three dots? He is absolutely giddy.

Hyunjin // 현진

☁️ 3AM version of him:

Sitting on his bedroom floor in a linen shirt with paint on his fingers.

Candles burning. Music playing. Heart? Open.

Has already drafted a poem and deleted it.

Feels everything. Cries a little. Posts nothing.

💬 What he texts you:

[3:11 AM] “the sky looks like you tonight” “soft. hard to describe. kinda breathtaking.” “i was sketching and my hand kept drawing the shape of your smile” “do you ever think someone could be your muse in every lifetime?” “i think you’ve always been mine” “sorry. it’s late. i miss you.” “...are you dreaming of me too?” (photo attachment: a blurry sketchbook page — your silhouette next to a moon, captioned: “unfinished. like us rn.”) (voice note, 0:22 — whispered: “if you were here, i’d draw your hands until the sun came up.”)

🖋️ Mini fic:

He’s not trying to be dramatic. It’s just how his heart works.

The candles help. So does the music. But nothing really fills the silence when he looks over at the empty space where you’d usually sit — cross-legged, teasing him, fingers tracing his sketchbook.

So he draws you. Again. Doesn’t mean to. You just... show up in the lines. In the curve of a shoulder, the tilt of a smile. You’re in everything lately.

He snaps a photo before he chickens out. Types a message. Sends it. Then another. Then lies back on the floor with his heart in his throat, hoping you feel him thinking of you — hoping you dream about him too.

Han // 한

☁️ 3AM version of him:

Lying sideways on his bed with one sock on and an empty bag of chips on his chest.

Watching otter videos. Overthinking. Humming your favorite song by accident.

Wants to FaceTime you but might combust if you answer.

Misses you so much it short-circuits his cool.

💬 What he texts you:

[3:14 AM] “do u ever miss someone so bad u start watching animal videos to cope??” “i just watched an otter hold another otter’s hand and now i’m emotional” “ur the otter btw. i’m the other otter. this metaphor is falling apart but i mean it.” “also ur laugh lives rent-free in my brain and it’s getting out of hand” “anyway ignore me i’m normal” “unless u miss me too. then i’m not normal i’m FREE TONIGHT” “ok bye or hi or call me pls i’m fine” (photo attachment: a cursed otter meme that says “this is me when you’re not here 😔”) (voice note, 0:19 — “hi. um. i miss you. but in a chill way. like... a healthy, definitely-not-panicking way. ok. love you. i mean. bye.”)

🖋️ Mini fic:

He doesn’t mean to text you. He just meant to think about you dramatically in the dark while eating sad snacks like a rom-com gremlin.

But then the otter video hit too hard. And he’s too warm. And the bed feels too big and too cold and too lonely. And that hoodie you wore once? Now it is sitting on his chair looking at him like it knows something or probably judging him silently.

But he breaks nonetheless.

Sends the otter. Sends 7 chaotic texts. Then immediately buries his face in a pillow because what was that?? But when he hears your reply chime a second later, his whole face lights up. And just like that, the spiral? Worth it.

Felix // 필릭스

☁️ 3AM version of him:

Lying on his side, fairy lights on, scrolling your old messages.

Hoodie sleeves covering his hands. Blanket pulled up to his nose.

Thought he’d fall asleep early but then remembered the way you smiled at him today and now he’s wide awake with a full chest.

Misses you so much it turns into little voice memos he has to re-record three times.

💬 What he texts you:

[3:16 AM] “are u sleeping? i hope u are. but also… i miss u and ur dumb adorable face” “if u were here i’d be hugging u so tight ur back would crack like bubblewrap 🥺” “stars are out tonight and they’re all looking at me like ‘damn u soft’” “they’re right” “do u feel it when i think abt u? like... do my cuddles reach ur soul telepathically” “u better be drinking water btw. i will check.” (photo: his ceiling fairy lights and a sleepy smile, captioned “thinking of u looks like this”) (voice note, 0:11 — “just wanted to say i love ur voice. and ur laugh. and ur everything. goodnight, angel.”)

🖋️ Mini fic:

He turns onto his side for the fourth time. The blanket’s warm but not warm enough. The lights are dim, soft music playing, but it’s still too quiet without you. His phone is cold in his hand and your last message is already 6 hours old — still sweet, still short.

He whispers your name once, like a test. Then again, into the mic this time. Saves it. Re-records it. Still too much. Still too soft. Still you.

He texts instead — messy, affectionate, sleepy as hell. Then stares at the screen, smiling like a boy who’s hopelessly in love and just a little shy about it.

Seungmin // 승민

☁️ 3AM version of him:

Lying stiffly in bed like he’s mad at the ceiling.

Headphones in. Lo-fi playing. You on his mind for 3 straight loops of the playlist.

Absolutely not checking your socials for the third time.

Misses you so bad he might actually admit it. Almost.

💬 What he texts you:

[3:19 AM] “why are you awake” “go to sleep loser” “unless u can’t sleep bc ur thinking about me in which case. understandable” “i’m not saying i miss you but this pillow is bad and cold and not you so.” “whatever.” “hope ur dreaming about me bc i deserve that at least” (photo: his hand holding your side of the blanket, captioned: “not warm. return immediately.”) (voice note, 0:09 — whispered like a confession: “ok. maybe i miss you. but if u tell anyone i’ll deny it forever.”)

🖋️ Mini fic:

He’s been lying still for over an hour. Blanket tucked tight, eyes on the ceiling like it’s done him wrong. Your hoodie’s still draped over his chair. Your toothbrush still in the bathroom, next to his.

Everything looks normal. Except it’s not. You’re not there. And the quiet’s too big. It feels wrong.

He doesn’t want to text first. He never wants to text first. But your name is already glowing on his screen. So he types something sarcastic. Something low-effort. And then stares at the send button for too long.

When he hits it, his chest softens. Because truly, with you, he always softens. And always will soften. You just bring it out of him.

I.n // 아이엔

☁️ 3AM version of him:

Hoodie hood up. Lights off.

Spotify playing something suspiciously soft.

Just scrolled through your texts from two weeks ago like a fool.

Absolutely wants to see you. Absolutely pretending he doesn’t.

💬 What he texts you:

[3:23 AM] “not drunk just dumb and thinking abt you lol” “if u were here rn i’d pretend not to care but also pull you into my lap in 0.5 seconds” “do u know how annoying u are for making me feel this much??” “anyway. miss ur stupid face. come ruin my sleep schedule or whatever.” “u looked good in that hoodie last week btw. real good. unfair.” “now i’m stuck being in love and it’s all ur fault. congrats.” (photo: his lap, blanket, a corner of your hoodie sleeve he’s wearing. caption: “guess who this belongs to. be here before i steal it forever.”) (voice note, 0:17 — “if u knock on my door rn i won’t even pretend to be cool about it. i’ll just hug u and pretend i wasn’t waiting all night.”)

🖋️ Mini fic:

He doesn’t mean to open your chat. He just meant to scroll for a second. Just meant to check if you posted. But now he’s lying there, hoodie sleeves over his hands, phone on his chest, screen lighting up his soft grin like a secret he’s not ready to share.

He thinks about texting “sup.” Thinks about just sending a meme. Ends up sending 6 messages and a photo of your hoodie instead.

He doesn't overthink it—just hits send. Because it’s 3:23AM and you’re in his head again. Just how you were earlier. Just how you are every time during his normal day-to-day routine when you're not there. Just you and his thoughts.

[quinloki]

FuckNoWriMo

Here's my official Writing Challenge Post for anyone who wants to play along.

FuckNoWriMo will be held December 2024 for this year only, and will be held in March from 2025 on. Due to the terminology being used, this is probably an 18+ event, but I swore like a sailor at 12, and it's not like I can stop you from participating.

How to Participate:

Decide you want to write during the month of the event.

Write.

Bonus!

3. Post and share that you're writing, and what you're writing if you want \o/ 4. Tag your posts with #fnowrimo or #fucknowrimo

Want more structure? Certainly, allow me.

Pick one of the categories to run with and set that as your goal for the month:

A Word, if I May?: Write at least 31 words for the month.

Get That Shit Outlined: Write at least 1,000 words for the month. (33 words a day)

Give it the Gusto!: Write at least 5,000 words for the month. (162 words a day)

Hell Yeah, Write!: Write at least 10,000 words for the month. (323 words a day)

Words At Work: Write at least 20,000 words for the month. (646 words a day)

Punctuated: Write at least 35,000 words for the month. (1,130 words a day.)

Fuck It: Write at least 50,000 words for the month. (1,613 words a day)

Crazy 88 (it's a Kill Bill reference): Write at least 100,000 words for the month. (3,225 words a day)

Please note you may write anything:

An outline, several outlines, rough draft(s), poetry, journaling, lyrics, role-play with your friends, a campaign idea for a table top game, the script for a movie, show, visual novel, etc., notes to defend your dissertation, recipes, to-do lists - you get the point.

If you want to breakdown the granular concepts of an old historic text on index cards for shits and giggles, that counts too!

The event is less about the quality of the end result, and more about creating a habit to write daily. If you don't want to spend a lot of time fixing and editing a harried rough draft, then don't worry about the word count at all.

0 is a valid word count for the day. So is 1, or 10, or 100 or all those little numbers we often get discouraged seeing.

But set aside some time during the month, and write some fucking words, hell, write some words fucking. A real alphabet orgy. Be silly, weird, cringe, strange, gross, problematic, thematic - whatever \o/

Just write it yourself. I don't care if you dictate it, use the hunt and peck method, a pen, pencil, quill, or chisel.

But for the love of all that's holy -

No Generative AI

That's the only rule.

[marisol-000]

I've accidentally created what is Definitively the funniest Jekyll and Hyde au ever

Basically it's a modern day au were theyre separate but both wear hearing aids and said hearing aids have somehow bluetooth connected to each other and no technician they go to has been able to fix it

They constantly eavesdrop and comment on each other's conversations, Jekyll tries to be subtle about it but Hyde just talks out loud and lets people stare

Jekyll acts as Hyde's conscience and gets onto him for things he does

Hyde becomes Jekyll's intrusive thoughts

Edward overhears a conversation Jekyll has with Lanyon and goes "wow, he sounds hot" and Jekyll chokes on his drink

Jekyll lives vicariously through Hyde by "forgetting" to turn his ears off when Hyde goes out to party

Eventually they find out they have a mutual friend (Rachel) and meet irl

When they want to talk shit about each other without them hearing they use sign language

Hyde's favorite hobby is to hunt Jekyll for sport by tracking him using the sounds around him, but thats also how Jekyll knows he's getting closer

If their heads get too close they get feedback

When they get annoyed with each other one of them turns their ears off

The best part is it can still be tagged as psychological torture. Imagine, you're having a terrible day and everything that possibly could happen does and its terribpe and you're having a mental breakdown and some guy named Edward is there 🤣

Edit:

Speaking to You From Inside Your Mind ;)

[theliteraryarchitect]

So... What Does an Editor Actually Do?

First off, “editor” is one of those words that causes a lot of confusion for writers. It seems simple—someone who works with words, right? But the truth is, “editor” can mean wildly different things depending on the context.

So, let’s clear things up.

When we’re talking about writing and publishing, “editor” usually refers to one of two roles:

1. The Gatekeeper: This is the person who commissions or selects work for a publication, like a magazine, newspaper, or publishing house. Think of phrases like “Her book was chosen by the editor at [Big Fancy Publisher].”

2. The Helper: This is the person who works directly with writers to improve their work. They might suggest revisions, clarify ideas, and polish the manuscript for grammar and style.

Both are called “editors,” but their jobs are completely different. To make things more confusing, in smaller operations (like indie presses), these roles often overlap. The same editor might choose your story for publication and offer stylistic or copyedits before it goes to print.

The 4 Types of Editing

Beyond the word “editor,” the types of editing writers encounter also vary widely, further boggling the mind. Here’s a quick breakdown of the four main types of editing your manuscript might go through:

1. Developmental Editing

This is the kind of editing I do, and the kinds of issues that are covered by the majority of my blog posts. Developmental editing:

• Focuses on the “big picture” of your story—plot, character, pacing, worldbuilding, and structure.

• Asks questions like: Does the ending make sense? Are the characters believable? Is the story too slow?

• This is the most intensive (and expensive) type of editing because it shapes the foundation of your book.

2. Stylistic Editing (Line Editing)

I don't do this kind of editing for my clients, but I occasionally publish line editing tips on this blog because I'm kind of a nerd about it :) Line editing:

• Works on clarity and flow at the sentence and paragraph level.

• Addresses repetition, awkward phrasing, and other issues that muck up your writing flow.

• Happens after developmental editing—no point polishing a scene if it might get cut!

3. Copy Editing

Once in a while I give copy editing tips on this blog, but they're usually wrong and I'm promptly corrected. Let it be known: The Literary Architect is a terrible copy editor. Copy editing:

• Focuses on technical details like spelling, grammar, punctuation, and consistency (e.g., making sure a character’s blue eyes don’t randomly turn brown).

• Think of this as quality control for your manuscript.

4. Proofreading

• The very last step before publication. The proofreader checks for any typos or layout issues that might have slipped through the cracks.

Whether you’re submitting to a publisher or self-publishing, editing matters. Great stories get rejected because they weren’t polished enough. And self-published books that skip editing often lose readers due to glaring errors or clunky prose.

If hiring a professional editor isn’t in the cards, learning to self-edit can help you get your manuscript into the best possible shape before publication. That way, if you do decide to bring in an editor later, they can focus on the deeper work instead of fixing things you could have tackled yourself.

Hope this helps!

/ / / / / / / / / / /

@theliteraryarchitect is a writing advice blog run by me, Bucket Siler, a writer and developmental editor. For more writing help, download my Free Resource Library for Fiction Writers, join my email list, or check out my book The Complete Guide to Self-Editing for Fiction Writers.

[16ferrari]

War wounds (1/2)

ꔫ pairing: thunderbolts x reader, little bit of Bob x reader.

ꔫ summary: back from a mission, the team needs fixing up. luckily you’re there for them to help them be put back on their feet

ꔫ warnings: mentions of blood, light pining between Bob and reader, petnames, mentions of wounds, mental breakdown, fluff/hurt, some foul language. Reader is affectionate with the team. Inaccuracies of medical care because i suck at writing about it, but i tried my best. Terrible ending. This is also long as hell. edited but maybe some error’s missed because tumblr was messing up.

ꔫ a/n: praying this doesn’t flop, I’ve helped too hard on this 🙏 anyways I loved writing this and I have a LOT of thunderbolts fics coming out!

You stood by the elevators anxiously pacing back and forth, hands clutching onto the med bag that hung around your shoulders tightly. You hated this part, hated when they were gone Longer than usual. Hated seeing them come home bruised, bloody, tired or some sort of bone broken. But it was your job to see them broken, only to be patched up and put back together by you.

“It’s not good when you’re like this” bob, who was left behind while the others fought wars and battles, suddenly spoke softly from behind you. He came to stand beside you, a gentle hand stroking your arm in comfort.

you sighted, running your fingers through your hair, “i know, but they’ve been gone longer than usual” your voice came out unusually low and sharp. Bob nodded in silence, he knew you were more than beyond worried, probably more than him, because he knew your history with them went way more back than him and them.

Bob dropped a arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side. “Maybe, they stopped to get groceries”

bob tried to get you to smile, but whined in embarrassment when it didn’t linger around long for it to hit your stressed and anxious head. So instead of saying anything else, bob stayed there with you, holding a gentle hold on your body, in hopes it might ease some of your stress, which it did. You felt a sense of calmness that time he held you, his touch was warm and gentle kinda like holding a little heater.

He kissed the side of your head, “they’re okay” he whispered into your ear. You nodded throat becoming tight with tears that wanted to fall down, but you swallowed then up and put on your best brave face.

It wasn’t easy, this job. Before you were recruited to work in the tower, you had worked at a hospital, a hospital that was near the tower and sometimes when a injury wasn’t that serious, the fighting hero’s would stop by just for a quick patch up and they would leave.

Over time, you saw and helped than regularly, they talked with you about their wars stories they were allowed to share and some stories about their own lives, separate from their line of work, whether they were true or not you listened and heard them. Loving the fact they were comfortable enough to open up with you.

Eventually though, they stopped coming to your hospital and were fixed up at home by someone else. until john had come to your place of work and complained that the person, who fixed him at the tower, messed up his stitching and probably had a infection, which he was right, he indeed had a real bad infection, but with the right treatment and medication he was good as new.

You thought that was the last time you would see him, seeing as they hired somebody else to take care of their wounds. But to your surprise that night john had stopped by your hospital he left a note on the hospital bed, call this number, we would much prefer you helping us and not a random. You were suspicious of the note, but the many nights you spent fixing their wounds, making you laugh, even going as far as to bringing you lunch from time to time just to see you, the suspicions you had were thrown out the window and you called the number.

And now, three years later, many patching them up and laughs later. You had a whole floor to yourself, a little hospital, you would put it. You even hired a couple doctors and nurses you trusted, but the team still refused their help and went directly to you when they needed patching up. You would scouted them about that, saying you couldn’t stand to see them basically standing in a line waiting for one another to get done with you so they could be next in line to get ‘healed’ by you, as they would call it.

Now, The mission they were assigned to was supposed to be simple, stop the bad guys, get the important information needed, and get out.

However That was four days ago when they were assigned to the mission. Within those four nights you tossed and turned around on your bed, a nasty feeling in your stomach that something went wrong.

So when Val stopped by your floor and told you she got in contact with them again after going radio silence for those last four days, you immediately felt a relief fill your body, but it was replaced with those stress and anxious thoughts, that prevented you getting a good nights sleep, when she told you they were more than beyond bruised, cuts, and scars.

In her words, “it’s a miracle they survived” she chuckled as he walked out. You wanted to punch her for that, and you would have, if it wasn’t for bob who grabbed on your bailed up fist, shooting you look that said just leave it alone.

The silence that filled the room from Bobs failed joke, was too much for you to handle. So when You dropped your head on his shoulder, you decided to add a light humor to the dead silence “we needed milk, maybe they stopped for that” you took a peak at him and saw a smile spreading across his face. You both broke out in a light laughter.

“Yeah, we did, john used the whole milk carton last night, “ he paused for a moment his body shaking as a laughing filled his stomach, “trying to make cookies for the guys’’ you looked at him funny, john walker trying to bake, that was new.

“John, baking?’’ Your head fall back a loud laugh erupting from your mouth, “oh, i would have loved to see that”

Bob wiped the tears that filled his waterline from the laughing, “imagine him in a apron, baking”

“God that would’ve been a sight to see” your continued laugher was covered by Bob pulling you back into his side, his arms wrapped around your back holding you place as you both stood there in front of the elevator waiting for the team to come back.

Once the laughter died down, you full came to the realization that you were embraced by bobs touch and warmth, “thank you, for this”

Bob hummed, pulling away and staring into your eyes. “Somebody always needs a little laughter to cope with the bad stuff that surrounds them” you nodded in a silence agreement.

The staring contest between you two broke, once you heard the elevator start moving, you looked at the number above the elevator doors and saw it was going up towards your floor. “Shit, they’re back” you awkwardly cleared your throat and straightened up your back immediately putting your gloves on, opening your med-bag just in case.

Bob snapped out of his glaze and looked around to call for help, but panicked a little once he saw it was just you both on the floor alone. ‘’shit, w-what can i do, y’know, just in case” Bob caught the gloves you threw at him and put them on.

You grabbed onto his arm and quickly pulled him to stand put by the operating table, where you had already cleaned the table and put fresh sheets down. “Stay here, and I’ll guide you if someone comes to you”

Once those doors opened, you stopped for a second and took in a sharp breath. They looked horrible, more horrible than you’ve ever seen. They were out of breath as They held each other up as best as they could.

They walked off the elevator path and headed straight to you. “Fuck” you said under your breath as you walked up to john, who was holding up Bucky. “Shit where’s his wound” you threw bucky’s good arm around your neck and lead him to the operating table.

John hunched over, hands on his knees as he caught his breath. “Side, Did my best at patching him up” john spoke breathlessly, you took a quick peak at him and saw the tiredness and hurt in his eyes.

Each member of the team walked to the empty beds falling on them with cries and groans.

“Okay, you did good. Follow bob and go sit down.” immediately bob appeared by your side and walked john to the different hospital bed that were ready to use.

You picked up scissors and cut open Bucky’s shirt, there a white bandage covered his side like john said. You slowly pulled the bandage down and saw the pretty bad stab wound to his side.

“Damn” you muttered. You were glad the stab he’d gotten didn’t hit any major arteries , or else he might not have made it because of were he was stabbed at.

Through his groans and gurgles, Bucky spoke with a pained voice. “Hows it look, doll?” You rolled your eyes at him and continued working on clearing the wound just enough for you to stitch him up.

“Pretty bad, buck” he cursed you out as he felt the head of the needle pinch his skin, “not nice”

He sent you an apologetic smile and whined in pain, “doesn’t exactly feel good”

You continued fixing his wounds, gave him medicine to help his pain and soon enough he fall back on the bed comfortably closing his eyes finally chasing that exhaustion sleep he’s been needing.

You took one last look at him before walking to the next rooms.

“Where’s your guys wounds at” you put on a fresh pair of gloves and watched as Ava lifted her suit with a shaking hand and showed you her big cut at her side that met her hip-bone, Next yelena showed you her back, you whined in response to the massive damage done to her back, some cuts and some burns, the burns, your eyes got wide with concern and curiosity but she sent you look that simply said don’t ask.

alexi waved you off like the big tough old man he was.

“Injuries not that serious” the girls and john groaned in response from their own beds.

“He was stabbed in the leg, got maybe some glass pieces in his hands.” Yelana glanced at her dad with an angry look for trying to get of getting help, again.

“Okay.’’ you muttered under you breath and looked over to john, who was just staring at the ceiling, hands clasped together over his chest like he’d just been put in a casket, “john, you good, over there?!” You yelled standing beside Ava’s bed attending to her wounds.

John gave you a thumbs up, “good doc, just resting my eyes” you shook your head at him, the rush of adrenaline flowing through your body seeing him like that, going away a bit, just a tiny bit.

“Don’t fall asleep john, might have a concussion that i Need to check You for.’’ John hummed throwing another thumbs up. You sighted frustration setting in, and the sweat starting to cover your body wasn’t exactly fun to combine with it. “okay, bob, come’’ bob immediately approached your side again, looking lost, fumbling with his fingers nervously looking between the injured team.

You noticed that and grabbed his shoulders gently, “Bob you good to work”

Bob nodded, but you needed more ensuring than that, “speak bob, please’’

“I-im good, what do you need’’ he looked a little more relaxed than before, so you pointed to where yelena was laying down at on her side.

“Yelena’s got some cuts and burns that are pretty bad, but shes gonna be fine’’ you saw a reflection of relief leave his eyes at you telling him she’ll be okay, “there’s some medicine in the med cabinet that i use for cleaning burn wounds, go get that, and get her some pain medicine, she’s gonna need it���’ he nodded to the words you told him and before he could fully walk away you grabbed his hand pulling back towards you.

“You remember how I taught you to clean wounds right?”

he nodded, but saw your face. “Yes I remember’’ he confidently said.

“Okay, now go stitch her up and come back to me when your done”

By the time you were done patching up Ava’s wounds, which she gave you many curses and insults for fixing she was almost as good as new. you left her alone to get rest and wandered over to john’s bed. You hissed looking at the dried up blood on his head, and the pretty big cut that the blood was coming from “What’d you get hit with, walker” you carefully inspected the cut.

“A pretty big rock. Doc’’ he spoke way too cheerfully making a light smile appear on your face, despite the insane amount of bloody towels and rugs surrounding you.

‘’do you feel nauseous, dizzy in the head, can’t see straight’’ john nodded to all those words you said, “okay, then you’re probably concussed, the cut on your head isn’t too big, and you have a few more cuts across your, well, whole body, that I’ll need to clean, can you take off your shirt’’

John scoffed playfully , “geez at least take me out first’’

You gave him a stern look, “john..’’

He lifted his shirt above his head and tossed it to the side. Once you got to work on cleaning and patching up those nasty cuts, bob approached you again, “she’s all good, what can i help with next” he looked at john and gave him a light smile which john gave back.

“Doing good, Bob’’ Bob muttered a thank under his breath and looked away from him.

“Okay, alexi has a pretty nasty cut, can you finish up cleaning john, and I’ll go patch him up’’ you looked at bob and handed him the cleaning kit you were using for john

“Y-yeah, of course’’ you raised your eyebrows at his sudden nervousness behavior, but you understood his shyness when it came to john.

You patted his shoulder as you walked away, “you got this’’ you whispered as you walked passed him

“Alexi, dude do you feel” alexi gave you the middle finger a smile lingering on his face at your stupid question.

“Well, I’m hurting’’ you hummed and wasted no time in getting him all fixed up.

“Thought you didn’t want my help” you joked

He laughed loudly, “pains getting worse”

“This mission was intense, huh?’’ He whined as you dabbed rubbing alcohol on his wounds. “never seen you all this badly hurt’’

He sighed, mouth opening and closing debating on whether he should tell you what happened on the failed mission.

“You don’t have to tell me” you spoke softly, knowing he was the main person out of the team that didn’t like scaring you with the horrors and pain that came with the job.

When he opened his mouth to speak he kept it simple and lighthearted, not wanting to go into fully detail then he needed to.

“everything that shouldn’t have happened, happened. We got trapped underground no way to contact help” he paused momentarily. Not longer whining in pain even when when you opened his wounds on his hands to pull out the big glass sherds that were stuck deep beneath his skin.

‘’They tortured us for information that we were supposed to get from them’’ he blinked slowly, memories flowing from behind his eye’s making a glossy look fill them.“ bastards used something on us so we weren’t the strongest people there” he finished off clearing his throat trying to fight back those memories.

You were left stunned and silenced. After that You just carefully attended to his wounds in pure silence not wanting them to suffer anymore from you trying to pride information out of them.

You finished up patching him up and softly played with his hand, a single tear fell down as he closed his eyes to finally get sleep.

Your heart ached for them, and you didn’t know to help them out instead of attending to their wounds.

“See you getting lost, sweetheart’’ john spoke from across the room, still getting treated by bob. “Nothing you could have done, we’re re the fighters, we’ll move along peacefully and forget this ever happened’’ you crossed your arms as you walked back over to his bed, standing right beside him.

“Been here for three years, almost four. never get used to seeing ya’ll come to me all bruised and hurt”

He used his good hand and played with the ends of your hair, something he said he used to do with his sister when she was young and she couldn’t fall asleep. “It’ll take a long time, y/n. But just remember, we’re tough and strong. We will always come back’’

You nodded, he was right and you needed to start believing that.

Once bob had patched him up, the very long and bloody night came to an end. Everybody was patched up and sleeping or watching some tv. You checked on them on last time before excusing yourself to go to the little kitchen your floor had, for a break, a break away from the injured heroes, a break from the bloodiness, a break from seeing the people you cared about so much hurt and broken.

You poured yourself a glass of water and sat down on the barstool, head in hands and deep breaths leaving your mouth. “You okay” you jumped looking behind you to see bob standing there still in his bloody clothes, which you told him he could change out of already, but like you he hadn’t gotten to that yet, seeing as he double checked everyone, like you. Making sure they were okay and no more blood was spilling from their wounds.

“Shit, you scared me” you patted the barstool next to so he could sit down, “I’m fine, nauseous and tired, but fine. How about you?” You saw a dead stare in his eyes, confused, tired, lost.

“How do you deal with this” he played with his hands that were on the counter in front of him.

You shrugged, “still trying to figure that part out. For now, i just shove it to the back of my head and hope to forget it”

Bob looked at you with concern, “isn’t that somehow making it worse, by not dealing with it firsthand?”

Again you shrugged, “i cope with things wrong, i guess’’ you laid your head on his shoulder, beginning to fumble with your hands the same way he does. “Also, i think I picked up quite a few habits from someone when it comes to coping with stuff” bob looked at you messing with your hands, and also saw that you took in a habit of biting your nails. Two of the habits you scouted him for having and doing.

He grabbed your hand, observing the now ruined skin around your nails. “Interesting”

“Shut up” it went quiet for a moment. Just the two of you enjoying the silence and the comfort of holding one another after the bloody day you both experienced.

“Thank you for your help today, you did good bob.’’ you looked at him only to see him staring at you already. “Couldn’t have done it alone”

bob’s face flustered red, he broke eye contact with you, the kitchen cabinets in front you suddenly looked very interesting. “I think you could’ve” he spoke low and slow. “You’re amazing at what you do, y/n”

now it was your face that beamed red. “Thank you bob” you said, standing up from the barstool quickly. A bad (good) ideal formed in your head, you leaned down and placed a quick kiss to the corner of his lips and made a run for it.

“Hey you cant do that!’’ Bob called out, but you were long gone behind the glass doors where the injured hero’s were at.

Your heart was beating fast and uncontrollably. “Shit” you ran a hand through your hair, stomach getting sick with butterflies. You shook your head, hoping to forget you did that and walked over to Bucky who was now stirring awake.

“How you doing buck?”

Bucky cleared his throat a grunt leaving his lips as he sat up a bit on the bed. “Feeling like i got stabbed” you chuckled, placing a hand on his covered wound making sure blood didn’t leak through the bandage.

“Well, crazy news flash you did” you joked back.

“How the other’s?” His joking voice was gone and replaced with concern.

You sighted, crossing your arms as you leaned against the pillar, “in bad shape, girls suffered major wounds, stab wounds to be exact, but they will be fine with basic medical care, john has a concussion, but he’ll recover fine, same for alexi’’ Bucky exhaled sharply, his body relaxing comfortably on the bed.

“And you?” You titled your head confused, “how are you feeling?, doll”

You shrugged, “fine, used to this already” you lied through your teeth and Bucky saw that.

“You’re not” he spoke with confidence. He patted his bed so you could sit down beside him, which you did.

“I’m not, but I’ll get use to it eventually” your hair fall down as you looked down at the bed. He pushed the fallen hair behind your ear, and gilded his hand down to your chin pitching it so you could look at him.

“It’s a tough job, deadly even. But you know we’ll always come back” you nodded, it was true, you did need to start believing that because they were strong, way stronger than you. And were professionals, they knew what they were doing, knew how to fight, kill and survive. But considering they were the last family you had standing strong it was hard for you not to feel a Sickening feeling when they went out to fight battles nobody would ever know what its like to fight.

“Always gonna worry about ya’ll” he picked up your hand, placing a kiss to the back of it. “You guys are my family”

His eyes gleamed with understanding and love. “I know doll’’

You moved his hair from his eyes and leaned down placing a kiss to his temple. “Try to get more sleep buck, you need it” he looked at you one last time before closing his eyes again letting sleep consume him.

You got up from his bed and walked out his open, quietly closing his door. You walked room from room checking on the other hero’s, making sure they were safe and good. Once you saw they were okay, you shut off the lights on the floor and quietly walked to your room.

You sighted as you sat on the edge of your bed. It was quiet. Way too quiet. You could hear your racing thoughts from which corner of the room, you covered your ears hoping to make those thoughts quiet. But it was no use, you could still hear them.

Your vision soon became blurry, your normal breathing turned to deep shallow breaths that hurt you to breath. You put a hand to you chest clutching your shirt, “fuck, fuck” your chest soon became tight, like somebody had put a big rock on it. “Fuck, it hurts” you didn’t know who you were talking to in the very dark room. But it was probably to the voices that wouldn’t shut up in your head.

Tears started to leak down your eyes that you couldn’t control, and soon enough you had curled into a ball and cried out into your knees. it was too much, too painful, too heartbreaking. The brave wall you put on to your family had came down and you couldn’t stop it.

in the mist of your breakdown you didn’t hear bob’s voice calling out your name, not until you felt a warmth of a body pulling your shaking and crying body into their embrace. You knew it was bob them.

“It’s too much” you finally admitted out loud to him. “Pretend i can handle it, but I can’t”

He softly stroked your hair, his other hand sliding up and down your back. Your tears stained his shirt but he didn’t care he held onto you until your body stopped shaking and soon your tears turned into dried up ones, the only sounds you made were sniffles.

“It’s okay to break down, its what keeps us strong and keeps us from going insane’ he whispered into your ear, “without breaking down we would lose ourselves, make bad decisions, have bad thoughts. So don’t think you’re weak for this’ he gently cradled your face, your red and puffy eyes faced him.

“You help them daily, help them get better, see parts of them your not supposed to see. But you do, you help them get through their pains and sorrows” bob moved you the hair that stuck to your face from crying. He leaned forward pressing his forehead against yours. It finally went silent, just the sound of your heartbeats were the only sound you could hear.

through a rough and tumbling voice you softly spoke, “thank you bob” he knew you meant that sincerely.

He nodded pressing a light kiss to your forehead, “don’t have to thank me”

“You need to change.” He leaned back and took in the sight of you still in your bloody clothes.

Vision still blurry you looked down grabbing at the hem of your shirt, thumb brushing over the dried up blood. “Yeah i do” your voice was barely above a whisper. Bob took in the fact you weren’t doing anything to get rid of the clothes so he got up from your bed and wandered over to your dresser, he pulled out a pair of shorts and a tank top.

Walking back to you, he took ahold of your hand and guided to the edge of the bed. “I’ll turn around while you change”

You grabbed the clean clothes from his hands and watched as he turned around, eyes closing tightly to give you more privacy. You pealed the clothes off your body and threw them to the side, you quickly slipped on the shorts and tank top.

You tapped bob on his shoulder, “you can look.”

Bob let his eyes wander over your frame making you go shy, “that looks better” you hummed agreeing with him.

Another staring contest formed between you, waiting for one another to make a move but the long dreadfulness of a night made you break the eye contact which bob wouldn’t admit out loud but he was disappointed, that is until you spoke up in your shyfulness voice, “will you sleep with me tonight?, don’t feel like being alone”

His heart started beating fast when you took his hand and guided him to the side you wanted him to sleep on. He happily got underneath the covers and waited for you to join him. When you did, bob pulled you close to him, one arm underneath your head and the other holding onto your hip. without thinking much bob placed a kiss to the back of you head and pulled the sheets tightly around you both.

You took ahold of his hand on your hip and tugged it against your chest, intertwining your fingers. “thank you again, bob”

“Stop thanking me, I’ll always be there for you”

When sleep overtook your bodies it was like somebody snapped their fingers and turned it morning quicker than usual.

The sounds of birds chirping in the background woke you up to face the sunlight shining into the once darkened room. You blinked a few times confused and hoping to wash the sleep away from your eyes, you took a look at the clock on your bedside table and saw it was eight in the morning. You groaned, head pounding like you’d gotten blackout drunk yesterday. You looked back and saw bob still in the same position, hand still holding yours while light snores left his mouth.

You unlocked your intertwined hands and slowly got up from the bed, cursing when the bed creaked underneath you. ‘’shut up” you muttered underneath your breath, hopping over the dirty clothes on the floor making your way to the shower that you so desperately needed after yesterday’s event.

The warm water felt like a blessing against your skin, you cleaned, washed your hair, exfoliated yourself good enough to were you finally felt free from the events that followed you from yesterday. Getting out of the shower however felt like a curse, you shivered goosebumps coating your skin. you quickly wrapped your robe around your body and walked out the bathroom.

“Interesting” you muttered to yourself when you saw bob still sleeping on your bed except he had turned to lay on his stomach, head slightly turned to the side as his arms were buried deep underneath the pillows his head was resting on.

You took in the quick fact he had gotten rid of his shirt and now the only thing that was covering him was your white sheets. You shook your head at the sudden thoughts that formed when you saw a glimpse of his back, and instead distracted yourself by running to your closest to pick a outfit. Once your changed into the outfit you had walked out of your room and went into the direction where the sleeping heroes were at.

You took in a deep breath when you came face-to-face with the glass door that opened and lead you to them, your hands hesitated pushing them open that is until you heard laugher filling up the floor expecting them to be asleep still, or dead. you were confused.

“There she is!” Bucky cheered, hands clapping loudly When he saw you enter the room. “Good morning, doll” you looked at each one and saw they were all sitting up on their beds, chatting and laughing like nothing had happened to them.

You crossed your hands as you walked up to them, “though for sure i was gonna lose at least one of you” you joked, a smile of relief covering your face.

They dramatically gasped, “can’t get rid of us that fast sweetheart!” Yelana yelled unexpectedly loud from her bed, making the others cover their ears.

“Like i would want to” you walked up to Bucky first to inspect his wound, “how do you feel Bucky?” He jumped slightly when you touched his bandage checking making sure blood didn’t leak through.

“Feel better now that you’re here” you rolled your eyes.

“Too early for the flirting buck” you pushed back his hair from his eyes and looked at the cut underneath his eye making sure it didn’t get worse overnight. “Well so far you look good, I’ll need to change your bandage in a minute, but first I’m gonna check on the others’’ Bucky nodded, grabbing onto your hand before you could walk away from him.

“Told you we would be okay”

That time he told you that you actually believed him.

“I know Bucky”

From the background you could hear the others making throwing up sounds and fake gagging causing you both to laugh, “enough flirting kids, there’s still injured people back here, doctor!’’ Ava yelled at you.

You walked over to them, giggling when you saw them sitting so politely and giving you oh-so sweet smiles. “I’m here, how do y’all feel?”

They shrugged, kicking their feet like kids underneath the blankets that were still covering them “shouldn’t you be checking us to know that” yelana said.

You sighted, “well yeah, but i need to know ya’ll’s pain level” you looked at Yelana’s wounds, whining in pain with her when you pulled down the bandage on her back that was covering her burnt up back, you saw it still looked bright red bits of skin missing and replaced with white puss, “back still looks bad, I’ll need to clean it extra deep, which may hurt.’

Yelena nodded like an was ordinary task, “okay” you gave her a look.

“I’ll need to give you lots of painkillers, which may knock you out for a while’’ you opened the pill bottle on her bedside table, popping out three pills.

She took the pills with water and leaned back against her pillows, re-getting herself comfortable. You gave her one last look before leaving her side, turning your attention over to Ava who now looked uncomfortable adjusting herself on the bed. “Star, how’s the side and hip?”

“Darling, honey, I’m hurting still” she sarcastically said through a painful smile.

“Well, I’m gonna prep you for surgery this morning, so you’ll have to get used to this bed, hon” she groaned, “in the meantime I’ll give you some pain medication, that should make you forget about the pain for awhile” she sent you a small smile and accepted the pills you gave her. You played with her hair and talked for a while trying to calm her nerves down about her surgery she was gonna have, the others occasionally joined into the conversation you both were having also trying to make her less stressed out, when it worked, you quietly left her alone while she was talking to Yelana and wandered over to john.

“How’s the head walker?”

“Hurts a little less than yesterday” you hummed, putting a pair of gloves on so you could change the bandage around his head. “Where’s renold at” your hand came to a halt at unwrapping his bandage, face suddenly turning red as a tomato. John chuckled at that, a wide smile spreading across his face. “Oh…oh?” He wiggled his eyebrows a knowing look in his eyes.

“No, john” you already knew where he was going with those eyebrows wiggles, “just comforted me..’’ you sighed realizing that sounds way worse. “Don’t even” john just broke out in a laughter which made you slap his shoulder for.

“Comforted you??” You ignored him, hands working on changing his bandages. “So, where’s he at”

You gave him a look, “sleeping in my bed” you put your hand on his mouth shutting him up before he could get those words out, “nothing happened!”

“Sure, sure” his words were muffled.

To make matters even worse, bob just so happened to appear right behind you. “Morning john” you dropped your hand from his mouth and turned to look behind you. “And good morning y/n’’

You cleared your throat, “morning bob, I’m gonna check on alexi” you rushed out the room, unluckily for you bob was hot on your tail following you around.

“Could have woken me up” he tugged on your arm pulling you back towards him.

Your grew wide when you realized the distance between you both and slowly took a step back, “figured you needed sleep after yesterday” a blush creeped to your neck. “You know after helping me with these guys’’ you paused, “and girls”

“Right..” it went quiet between you two, a part of you both hoping those lines between you both would be crossed, but you made no move either did he. “So, um, what do you need help with today” Bob scratched his neck awkwardly.

“Why don’t you make breakfast for them, and I’ll finish up here”

Before he could say anything else you rushed away from him, making a beeline to Alexi’s room. “How you feeling old man?”

He showed you the middle finger, “not that old. But I’m not in pain”

you chuckled, “thats a first” you checked the wounds on his hands and then his legs, his wounds didn’t look even remotely good.

Seeing your concerned face, he knew something wasn’t right. “What’s wrong doc”

You re-patched up his hands and legs and moved to stand at the edge of his bed. “Considering i just fixed up you up yesterday, your wounds don’t look the best, so you’ll have to be bedridden until you’re able to fully use your hands, because” you placed a feather light touch to his hand and saw him hiss in pain, “you’re hands will take a long time to properly heal, same for your leg”

“Time to retire?” He jokingly asked.

You snicker, “oh you’re far from that’’

He suddenly got serious, “i will get to use my hands and leg again, right?”

Your gaze softened at him, you nodded. “Of course you will, I’ll make sure you recover right”

Once everybody was checked, changed bandages and looked good enough to be on their way. You stepped aside and watched as bob walked into each rooms, handing them plates of food. A smile grew on your face as you saw the hero’s shoving the food down with laughs and chattering filling the room once again.

[kloofspeaks]

The Creation of a Physical Copy of Coming Home (But Not to You) - The complete summary

Since, I promised I would update this as soon as I started working on it and boy, has it been several hours of me trying to learn how to use Microsoft word, hundreds of songs in my Jayvik playlist and perhaps, a small minor emotional breakdown. I have gotten Coming Home (But Not to You) formatted for bookbinding.

I hope @lesbianherald knows that they have not only written about 678 pages of a glorious and beautiful story but when in book format, that comes out to be 340 pages which is bigger than Romeo and Juliet by Shakespeare (which.. you out wrote him twice). I swear, I promised to update you and that’s literally all I have besides a minor practice signature before I venture out to find a book suitable to hold the piece and paper that looks a tad more vintage.

The first draft pages in word looked like this, this was also MY final concept before I went out of my way to make a little page design in procreate. (Featured later)

The Artist featured also gave me permission to use this for this personal project. Please, check them out with this link here: X (their art is gorgeous)

[Written January 3rd, 2025]

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Okay, we’ve settled on some covers. Might be wondering why I didn’t want to make one from scratch? I didn’t want to weather it, personally. It’s a lot more work and the threading and binding itself is going to take most of my time. I’m working on A4 (Actually, it ended up being smaller than A4 at about 11 by 8.25 but when folded it’s 5.5 by 8.25) paper format, having to adjust my measurements as we go because they were drastically different in the word document. I edited some of the features of the pages and actually sketched out a design for my Cricut to use for the cover and chapter page emblems for just a little personal flare!

I actually went to the thrift store and broke apart books that werent in use to provide me a proper book board because the ones I had were too thick! Reuse and recycle, baby! (All for the power of Jayvik)

A little thing about this project is that I actually bought weathered paper for this! Yeah, that.. it didn’t end up coming LMAO. I did buy some book corners for some metal flare. The hexcore design I drew out, myself, in procreate and also cut out in Cricut (thank you, TikTok tutorials).

A little fact as well; I haven’t bookbinded in 3 years! My books when I started were actually GOD awful— which is also part of why I chose a base book frame because that was my biggest weakness when it came to this. The binding itself was actually the easiest part to me when I started! I kid you not, I did very much come out of retirement because of Jayvik. I wanted a physical book I could mark and leave notes on, so why not make it myself? I’m extremely thankful, I got permission to do this and plan on doing this with another one of my favorite Jayvik fanfictions once it is completed, so perhaps… maybe. I don’t know, after I had gotten all the signatures out I had realized that the book covers used WERE TOO SMALL! This is the book before pressing for over 48 hours and in a middle of a snowstorm!

[Written on January 6th, 2025]

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And the book is binded! I had used wax thread which is already thicker and way more durable and actually made for bookbinding. It has already had about two layers of glue on the binding but I tend to do about four just for extra strength and protection. It should be going in the book in about a day or two, which will lead to the final update of this!

It took me about three well-spread out days, six hours of actual sewing and teaching myself how to use a curved needle without violently stabbing my skin but I was able to get the box-stitch in.. I tried to even out the layers as I had binded too fast in one part and two signatures ended up being uneven, whoops. I fixed that with a tap of a literal hammer (No pun intended) but this was truly an experience. The parts with the open black page on front is when the stitching was glued and the book pages were placed on. This also meant I had the actual book for it to sit in ready. Which was crazy to think about.

Would you believe me if I told you I measured this all by eye and had to cut the pages four different ways to make this book actually become a book. The next paragraphs will be glamor shots. Thank you for sticking with me— encouraging me on this because of my LACK of experience in this entire field and prayers for my poor fingers.

[Written on January 13th, 2025]

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And we’re here, it’s finished and settled. Here are the glamor shots. I do plan on doing more bookbinding in the future as I DID enjoy the process but folding and making signatures will forever be my enemy. Here’s the glamor shots and underneath the cut is all my reactions and build up to finishing this monster of a book.

A couple things, I never want to do this again. If I ever do a fanfiction THIS big again. I’m spilting it into two books, perhaps even three depending on how big it is. The symbol on the front is the Piltover symbol, I tried to find Jayce’s Talis house symbol and THERES NOTHING, I literally tried drawing and everything. My Cricut didn’t want to cut it and trust me, I tried for over three hours with the symbol.

What only matters is that I think it’s cute. I think the simplicity and mix of tears added to the final design a lot more than I thought it would.

If I ever do this again. (Knowing me, I will.) I plan on revisiting this, probably make another version when I have more bookbinding knowledge under my belt LMAO, but enjoy this lengthy post. I’m now going to go to bed.

Also huge shout out to my Zelda art book for being my primary book press for this entire thing. I really need a book press.

[Finished, January 14th at 12:08 AM, 2025]

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