#get magic’d

[solarhen]

Get magic’d

hey i’m gonna go to sleep, can you watch my apple while i’m gone? thanks!

[shadowtraveled]

sorry that i think power of friendship is the best trope ever i’m right though

[avatar-legends-confessionblog]

Trans girl zuko who gets spirit magic’d into having girl body in between leaving Iroh and the abandoned town, and due to fear she doesn’t rejoin them and instead just kinda books it after the fight like “haha thanks water tribe for healing my uncle you can keep him bye!” *runs into the desert before anyone can notice that she has boobs now*

*aang notices but thinks he’s just sleep deprived and doesn’t bring it up*

X

[one-hit-boy-wonder]

Crackfic idea: all the bats with brain injuries/brainwashing get magic’d back pre-recovery

Bruce has amnesia and forgot he’s Batman, Ric Grayson is back, Cass is evil again, Jason’s in his post-reincarnation catatonic state, Tim is Joker Jr., Babs has been Brainiac’d, and everyone has a concussion.

[moviemunchies]

Imagine, if you will, a non-Disney version of a Once Upon a Time-ish miniseries from twenty years ago. That is the fastest way to describe The 10th Kingdom.

“I’m wishing on a star…”

There is a world with nine kingdoms, in which all the famous fairy tales you know took place, ruled by the descendants of those tales’ heroes and villains. Snow White’s stuck-up grandson, Prince Wendell, is about to be crowned King of the Fourth Kingdom. He has a routine annual visit to the kingdom’s prison, but there’s a jailbreak, and the Evil Queen escapes. She uses magic to make Prince Wendell switch bodies with a dog, though before she can capture Dog!Wendell, he escapes through a magic mirror to…

Our world, the Tenth Kingdom. Specifically, Central Park in New York City, where he runs into Virginia Lewis, a young woman who is too cynical to believe in happy endings working as a waitress. She lives with her father, Tony, a maintenance man in a skyscraper. The Evil Queen decides to send some peons after Wendell: trolls who helped her escape, and Wolf, a half-wolf (werewolf-type, I think).

Of course, shenanigans ensue.

Despite not getting a ton of watchers when it first aired, this series turned out as a sort of cult classic. And it’s not hard to see why–it’s a fun little story with surprisingly deep worldbuilding that invites one to want to like this world. There’s strong character work with our protagonists and antagonists, too. Virginia isn’t a boring, no-feature protagonist. She’s a cynical young woman (and she has reason to be cynical) dragged into a fairy tale. Wolf wants to try to be good for Virginia but doesn’t know how. Tony is short-sighted and easily magic’d, but ultimately wants what’s best for his daughter.

And it’s got Warwick Davis! He’s in there.

There are fun villains, too! Unlike Once Upon a Time, there’s not really much of an attempt to make the Evil Queen too sympathetic (though it’s not the same Evil Queen, I guess). She’s still a good villain, who takes over every scene she’s in. And there’s the Huntsman, played by Rutger Hauer, who just feels like a fairy tale villain come to life in his performance.

There are a couple of weaknesses in the characters. Tony Lewis can be quite annoying with how short-sighted he is, making bone-headed decisions without thinking of how it would go in the long-run. The thing is that I think it works: he’s not the sort of person that cares about fairy tales, and we all know at least one person who would make exactly the same choices because they think it’s clever. Heck, if recent events teach us anything, it’s that there are plenty of people who make dumb choices for short-term cash without looking at the big picture. It helps that when push comes to shove, Tony cares for his daughter and is willing to go to great lengths to protect her.

It is also interesting to see John Larroquette playing a complete doofus, considering that the roles I remember him from, Chuck and The Librarians, he is very much not a doofus.

The trolls… can just be annoying, though. Okay, yeah, they’re supposed to be, they’re stupid trolls. And they don’t have any likable underbellies like Tony does. They are sometimes amusing, but not as much as they’re clearly intended to.

I like the idea, presented in the story, that magic items are inherently addictive. When Virginia picks up some magic shoes that may prove helpful, Wolf is quick to try to dissuade her because they’ll have to use them. And that’s an interesting idea that fits in perfectly with a fairy tale-type world–of course using a shortcut will become addictive to the user.

Given the title, and the title sequence, you’d think that the story takes place heavily in New York. Aside from the first bit of the story, it really doesn’t. I suppose the fairy tale realm of the nine kingdoms makes for a better setting, all-around, yet it still might have been fun to see these things play out in modern NYC. I suppose Enchanted scratched that itch a few years later.

There is quite a bit of suggestive content, especially in dialogue (mostly Wolf’s…) which kind of surprised me? I don’t think it’s a problem, mostly, and really, it goes along with the theme they’re going for. Because the old fairy tales could certainly be suggestive. I’m not thrilled with it, but I can’t say it’s completely out of place.

It’s fun. I don’t think it’s brilliant, but it is good, and it’s kind of cool to see how someone approached fairy tale stories in modern day on television long before Once Upon a Time came along. The only major complaint I have is that some of the effects really haven’t aged that well. Then again, it was made on a TV budget, so I suppose it can be forgiven for that.

[toomanyf4ndoms7]

Adventures in Babsitting Missing Scene: Blackhawk in the building.

Summary: Honestly, Barbara isn’t even surprised by this.

Masterlist (Also has a basic summary of the AU attached if you're just now joining us.)

@spoilerqlert

@dchuntress

Barbara Joan Gordon had been through her fair share of harrowing situations, whether it was as a civilian or a vigilante. And in most situations, she could study the board and begin to turn it over to her advantage.

However, in her current regressed to childhood state, she’d neglected to consider the downsides of inviting Zinda Blake to the base after Helena and Dinah.

The downside being: Zinda Blake's near boundless energy as she cuddled and squealed over how adorable Baraba looked in her current state.

“Aw, now ain’t you the cutest lil thing a lady ever did see? That’s right, yes it is!” Zinda cooed with all the infectious energy of a golden retriever.

Barbara was subjected to this fawning and giggling, while her other two operatives watched on. Helena was smirking, Dinah took a picture.

Traitors. Both of them. Her vengeance upon returning from this cruel curse would be swift.

After an agonising three minutes of playful nicknames and asking for details over the situation, Zinda pulled away with a grin and turned to meet her other teammates.

“Gotta say, girls, this must’ve been quite the surprise. Should’ve called me over sooner.”

Dinah shrugged.

“We didn’t want to overwhelm the place. Plus, you were busy.”

A scoff burst out of the pilot’s lips, sticking a thumb over to young Barbara.

“If I knew our leader had been magic’d into this precious cutie pie, I’d’a drop everythin’ just to come over.”

Barbara cleared her throat, Dinah getting the wordless message.

“Right, well, as much of a novelty that this is, the spell is temporary and we need to make sure Barbara isn’t feeling condescended. She’s still a genius adult, just…”

“Pint sized?”

“Yeah,” Dinah replied, catching Zinda nod with understanding before turning to Barbara, crouching down.

The pilot’s face was different now, still enthusiastic but less overflowing with laughter and nicknames.

“Hang tight, skipper, you’ll be back to normal before you know it.”

Barbara was a little touched by Zinda’s confidence, but after all the cutesy cooing she’d been subjected to, it was important to make up for her damaged dignity.

She made up for it with a totally maturely stern attitude and tone of voice.

“Don’t baby me, Blake…”

A giggle.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, honey.”

-----------------------------------------

Yeah, I had this idea at work and I had to get it out. Consider this a What If Zinda was involved in more than just the epilogue. I hope you enjoyed.

[i-want-to-commit-last-bath-bomb]

I’ve been thinking of my own Magical Girl story that I’m probably not gonna do anything with, and so far I’ve got:

1. Adult Magical Girl that’s absolutely fucking the mascot

2. Magical Trans Woman, because getting Magic’d into being a woman is cheaper than HRT

3. Depressed Magical Girl, because being a Magical Girl pauses your aging, but if a person loses their powers they start rapidly aging to their chronological age. Her powers were given to her by her mom, who is over 200 years old.

4. Magical Girl MILF, she created the mascot and so as a way of thanking her, he turned her into a magical girl. She has powerful telekinesis. She’s a minimum of 700 years old

[kalek-the-mad]

{personal log no.13}

So I managed to get inside that tower in mor dhona and I managed to somehow get Magic’d to wherever here is no matter I have a job to do lets see what we can find.

I appear to have found what I can only assume is the containment and research area filled with honestly I have no idea memory crystals maybe. Either way I hope to the gods those aren’t hornbill eggs bastards are bloody terrifying.

Oh that is definitely not good.

I wonder who’s idea was it to build a research platform IN F*CKING SPACE I mean seriously who thought that was a good idea no matter I wonder what’s up ahead guess I’ll just find out now.

Well…f*ck

{signed: kalek, unofficial gleaner and field researcher}

[princess-of-anons]

you’ve got to talk more about the mario pmd eos retelling please please

HEY SO I WASNT EXPECTING ANYBODY TO ASK ME ABOUT THIS???? (Context in the tags here)

I don’t know who sent this but it’s been almost 12 hours since I got this when I’m writing a response I REALLY needed to sit on this to remember the details.

So when I said Mario characters I failed to elaborate on the fact that this was not just Mario characters. This is Mario characters, turned into Mario enemies, heavily redesigned to look like Pokemon. So you’ve got Koopas and paratroopas and other Koopa variants based off several starter lines, I think the torchic line was retrofitted over some goombas. And yes this all still (SOMEWHAT LOOSELY) plays out the plot of PMD: EOS.

All the in-between stuff was unplanned outside of the REALLY major plot points like the Beach, the Future and Temporal Tower, stuff like that. I must confess that EOS was my very first pokemon game, and all the other information I had on pokemon was based on a book I had on the Sinnoh Pokédex. so a lot of things like “does this enemy actually work as a good template for this pokemon” were completely thrown out the window because for some reason I couldn’t fathom just turning Mario characters into Pokemon.

I had a dedicated prologue that explains how the characters ended up in PokeMario Mystery Dungeon World, mostly derived from my headcanon that all the major Mario characters lived in Peach’s castle, yes even Bowser (who’s villainy is more of a day job because why else would he join them all in kart racing), yes even the other bad guys (including the dead ones), yes even Mario and Luigi (who I didn’t know had their own house). It was that two characters would leave the castle at night, go into the woods (like a moron) and they get Magic’d away. One of them would get sent to the beach, become the PokeMario hybrid I associated them with and meet the partner; the other would be sent to the Dark Future to play the role of Grovyle.

Now you may be asking, why are you being so vague about the characters here? Well to put it simply, I did this multiple times with multiple character pairings:

Mario and Luigi (Charmeleon? and Grotle)

Dimentio and Mimi (???? and Glameow. Sorry friends I have genuinely forgor what I turned Dimmy into for this crossover)

Blumiere and Timpani (Crobat and Beautifly)

There are others but I didn’t keep track of them because in my 9 year old mind I assumed this would be easy knowledge to recall 15 years down the line. Obviously this was not the case.

My memories are so faded that I honestly can’t recall what the point of the partner was. Or if I even included the partner at all. I just recall that that unlike canon EOS, your playable character did not lose their memories. In fact they are very aware of their past but just don’t know where their original travel partner went. The whole Planet Paralysis thing is just as much a surprise to Player 2 in the Dark Future as they are for Player 1. Also the fact that you don’t lose your memories and EVENTUALLY piece together that this other hybrid thing is your partner does make The Sacrifice sadder. I think the EOS postgame was not covered in this crossover because Player 1 and Player 2 would both wake up at home again after disappearing and saving time.

I can look through my old sketchbook in the morning to see if I can find drawings because I swear to god I have some. Thank you for listening to my unhinged ramblings.

I would ALSO like to note that within like, a few years of creating and discarding this crossover that I saw a video that combined PMD with Portal, subsequently introducing me to the Half Life/Portal universe and resulting in me replacing this crossover AU with a DIFFERENT crossover AU that was literally just the plot of the HL/Portal games with pokemon. I have lots of confidence in saying I could 100% bring back the Half-Life/PMD AU in the current day. Especially now that there is over 1000 of those little poké-fucks to attach identities to.

[pendragonsclotpole]

le gasp another clotpole

100% not poorly executed, the ending was heartbreaking and just the right amount of dramatic to end the story

Arthur gets shish kabob’d by Mordred, attacked by his sister, and witnesses his soulmate use magic after years believing that magic is a corrupting influence and threat

That shit fucked me up, and the scenes where Merlin’s trying desperately to take Arthur to the lake to get him healed and Arthur just wants to be held? Stab my heart with excalibur and roast it over the campfire Merlin magic’d into existence.

I do think it would’ve been better if instead of “thank you,” Arthur had said “i love you,” romantic or platonic or at least something to the extent of Merlin’s devotion, idc these men knew each other for years and finally had merlin’s secret out in the open

but yeah there’s def a huge difference between badly written and so fucking tragic it fills you with a righteous indignation

Still makes me mad when people call the Merlin finale "poorly executed"

like that was THE most heart-rending emotional fucking hour of television I've ever seen. Please learn the difference between "badly written" (see: the finales for HIMYM and GoT) and "tragic/narrative choice that made me unhappy"

[the-cat-doctor]

We know a little bit of magic, by the way~

would you mind if we magic’d a parlor onto the cafe? Just a nice little place to sit and snuggle? Both for us and whoever gets transformed in the future!~

ฅHmm... Sure you can! I don't mind, meow! Besides-- The Cafe can have a few...improvements.ฅ

[chiptunecreature]

I’m gonna meet Tink in seven months

[sourmiguel]

True Ending by beargrove (wc1982, teen)

Summary: Derek is looking at him, incredulous. “You’re staying?” Stiles stares at him like he’s an idiot, “You magic’d an us baby and then didn’t tell me for 15 entire years of his life. I’ve missed 15 years, you’ve made me into a deadbeat dad and I didn’t even know about it.”

I adore this fix-it. Such a great little read.

**Double Rec Incoming!** Two TW Movie fix-it recs for the price of one!

Gay love can pierce through the veil of death and save the day by Talesoftheenchantedforest (wc4382, teen)

Summary: If Allison gets to be resurrected, then so does Derek.

Another great movie fix-it. Short and sweet.

[dailyadventureprompts]

Merchant:  Taris of Fourcorners and his avian assistant, Flyt

I know I left that codex around here somewhere. Flyt, remind me to organize all this mess.... sometime after I finish those translations.... or after we finish the Mezlat Commission... 

Setup:  Out for a day on the town, the party is sought out by a tittering bird who harasses them until they enter (read: break into)  a seemingly closed bookshop in the nicer end of the market.  The space inside is far larger than the cramped storefront might alow, and is not only full of a library’s worth of volumes but also workshops and numerous defenses to prevent such an incursion.  In the center of this arcane maze the party finds a reedy wizard who’s spent the past two days buried under his immense collection of books. 

This accident prone arcanist is Taris, a knowledge seeker who realized that the easiest way to afford all the rare tomes and materials required for his research was to start getting other people to pay for it, hiring himself out as a taskmage and convincing his patrons that his particular obsession of the moment was the key to their ills.  

As it turned out, the patrons were lining up to have their problems magic’d away, and soon Taris found himself buried ( literally and figuratively) under his workload. 

Wares & Services: 

Cantrip Curios: the Mainstay of Taris’s magical trade is placing minor enchantments on objects to make the life of their bearers easier. Brooms that do the sweeping up, kettles that fill and boil when commanded without need of flame, keys that return to the hand when needed. While he’s happy to sell to whosever buying, Taris’s desire to expand and experiment means that he’ll pay the party richly if they bring him other such objects that he can backwards engineer, providing a great place to sell early game loot. 

Bookworm for hire: have an ancient manuscript that needs translating? Obscure prophecy that needs to be cross-referenced with different historical accounts?... is the party solely made out of dumb bruisers and overdramatic fops who can’t be bothered to do their own research? Taris is available to do the party’s homework for them, and has a %90 greater chance of detecting whether a work happens to be cursed... %85 if it’s REALLY interesting.  

Erstwhile Enchanter: In addition to dealing in a sizeable collection of magical items both obtained and self made, Taris offers to make or upgrade specialty enchantments on items for high paying customers (or people that he owes a favor).  Often booked up for weeks, the mage is sometimes willing to kick certain projects to the top of the queue if the magic is particularly interesting or the pay is worth the inevitable heckling. Though this favoritism may prove double sided, when one of the party hands over their signature weapon for a tuneup only to be repeatedly put off after some noble decides to browbeat the young man with a new order.  

[inventors-fair]

Named Common Contest: Range of Playables

I have yet another confession; feels like I’ve been doing a lot of those these days. Maybe it was the fact that I’ve been doing a lot of work outside the Fair, or the fact that I’ve been really Magic’d out with fatigue and whatnot, but I came up with this contest more as a cool idea for the future and less about something I was personally interested in/something I’d build myself. We get a lot more entries on average, and hoo boy, commentary’s still a lot of work for a Saturday, but with this, I felt really backed into a corner. How am I supposed to write about this?

With fun. From the perspective of fun. That’s what makes the most sense. Am I going to apply my normal sensibilities? Yes, but designing for new players and kids and weird people is something that I’m drawn to, because I’m often surrounded by new players, kids, etc. So maybe this is a root return. But y’all don’t need to hear that. You want the goods. It’s nice to see your work appreciated and talked about. That’s...why this whole thing exists, heh.

BY THE WAY: Very important to note. If your card doesn’t meet the qualifications for the contest, in the future, it may not be considered at all. Please, please read what the contest is looking for. Carefully.

Judge Picks are cards that I want to showcase for some reason or other, cards that I like personally or that have good design sensibilities. Let’s see.

@10001gecs​ — Paul Bunyan, Forest Feller

As many Fair veterans know, I am not a man who is beholden to shenanigans. Shenanigans include outside/non-Magic IPs in otherwise serious contests. However, I hate to admit it, but this card’s really well-made. I feel that there were a lot of well-designed green cards this week? I’m worried about bias, but I always am—thought not as much as your opponents should be worried about getting smacked in the face with Giants.

All the same, let’s get some parts out of the way. For one, a legendary name without the legendary supertype on an effect that definitely needs to be legendary? That’s a bit of an issue. While I like the Giant archetypes, too, the fact that Giant Ox is a vehicle-based card and this card has nothing mechanically to do with that is a bit of a misstep to me. I would suggest taking a step back and considering what your card actually does versus what it might be sensible in some ways to do. Yes, Giant ____ is the meme, but how can you use that in other ways?

~

@bergdg​ — Krenko and Mizzix

They’re gonna kiss! ... Anyway. What they’re actually going to do is be pretty okay. I like the overall fun factor that you’re going for. It does feel super weird that this card only has one of their colors when all the other team-ups are, well, teamed up. Still, concept is neat. Krenko’s Command is one of those cards that my kids like so I’m very familiar with the attachment, heh.

The fact that “the exiled card” can potentially refer to other cards besides Krenko’s Command is problematic in execution, considering other spells/abilities that could exile cards. Additionally... Well, I don’t feel the team-up, honestly. It’s not particularly resonant with either one of their normal abilities and it’s not particularly strong either. Honestly, I think if you wanted to commit to the team-up, this wasn’t the contest for it; a new Krenko might have been a better option overall.

EDIT: I’m actually wrong about that exiling part! Florence pointed out that 607.2A takes care of that. Who’da thunk!

~

@ct-mayor​ — Nit, Restorer of the Old Ways

I’ll admit, even though I’m kind of a fan of Hieroglyphic Illumination myself, I haven’t considered it a popular or resonant enough card for someone to be a fan of it. Still, it makes sense, and this card’s not bad! The name “Nit” isn’t, uh, quite resonant with me in the same way? Considering the English word, it’s a little odd. But overall flavor-wise, that studious aspect comes across.

“Win the game” effects are a hard balance. I think cycling into a four-of with this card and then just recasting your illuminations is pretty rough to go up against, but it’s not out of the question. The fact that it’s all centered around a single card with no other interaction if you don’t have them makes it feel a little too specific even for this contest. If you don’t have any of that specific card, what’s the point? Yes, there’s build-around-ness, but no card exists in a vacuum. Consider how your card needs to interact with the greater formats in which it would be played.

~

@deg99​ — Invigorating Geomancer (JUDGE PICK)

This card is inviting infinite loops. How? ... Wait, gimme a second. ... Okay, well, Sakura-Tribe Scout, two Retreat to Coralhelms, Zuran Orb, and Junktroller can get you infinite life, but maybe I’m overthinking the loop. The point is: this one is actually really good. Lava Dart, IMO, isn’t too powerful for standard, and burn needs all the help that it can get at this point. I’m not quite certain what “Invigorating” is going for here? The mood’s a little odd, but the point is, this card can be crazy powerful with the right build. Frankly, I’m imagining this in Pioneer with some weird Jund decks, and it’s hecka fun.

It’s specific without being too powerful, although that loop, with land sacrificing, could mean awful things for other formats. The ability to just loop your Mountains is...crazy good. REALLY good. I think just about any mono-red deck with Armageddony effects will go nuts for this. Wow, actually, can you imagine? Old red “destroy all lands” cards are basically negated. That’s silly and ridiculous. I love it; it won’t impact the formats in which it would be played normally. Limited might mean more land sacrifice cards, or just permanent sacrifice, which is interesting to me... I wonder what other mechanics we might see!

~

@demimonde-semigoddess​ — Stillborn Demon

I’m a huge fan of visceral reactions. The term “Stillborn” to describe anything in Magic evokes a truly awful feeling for me. There are some descriptors that extend beyond the realm of natural human encounters, but the grotesquery of that concept here is...genuinely off-putting. Any other name would have been preferable. Within reason.

Card-wise, it’s certainly fine, and I suppose people are still making Shadowborn Apostle decks (although I’ve never actually played against them? Weird. They’re still kinda pricey.) here and there. The issue comes from the fact that, well, do you want to be sacrificing your Apostles, really? The Apostles are utilized to tutor demons, not to be fodder. If THIS is the demon that you’re looking for, well, you might be in limited, which is vaguely understandable, but constructed? It feels antithetical. As a card normally, it’s perfectly serviceable as an uncommon flying beater, nothing wrong with that.

~

@dimestoretajic​ — Kenji, Sokenzan Artist

I double-checked to make sure that Iron Apprentice was the card I thought, and wow, there you go! Kenji’s part of the sacrifice crew, and that archetype could be really nasty on Kamigawa. Maybe we’ll see him in another world. I like the fact that I can kind of picture this guy, an artist with all his little robots, shaping them to hone his skill. Maybe he’s a blade artisan of sorts! It would explain the first strike and the general warrior feel to him.

Sacrificing artifacts is great. The bonuses from the creatures and the huge bonuses from Iron Apprentice are even bigger. I feel that you may have boxed yourself in a little with them. Getting bigger is nice, but is there anything more? This card feels a tiny bit underwhelming without that direction. But, it’s okay to just call a card a bomb as it goes. I wish he felt a little more legendary and I wish that we could see more of his artistry. Still, someone could make the Sokenzan-Forge deck if they like him enough, right? I suppose that’s the point of this whole contest, heh.

~

@greensunzenith​ — Shadowborn Gravecaller

I feel that this card is close and that you’ve got some good things going for you. Shadowborn Apostle was NOT the right choice for this card. This isn’t going to be the last time I go over this, as y’all have seen, but Shadowborn Apostle fulfills a very specific deckbuilding archetype. Adding additional cards that aren’t apostles or demons is just going to make the deck worse and the math checks out on this. How many of this card would you want? What would you put into the deck?

Most importantly: would adding this card genuinely be any better than adding in another Shadowborn Apostle? Frankly, I don’t think so. Whatever they’re doing, the statistics are against you. Maybe in a Commander deck? In limited, that first ability is phenomenal, don’t get me wrong. But with all the other aspects, knowing what the deck wants to go for, I don’t feel that it’s the right choice for the Apostles.

~

@hypexion​ — Amp-Amp, Shock Jock (JUDGE PICK)

I hatelove this card. I have NO idea how to feel about it. A single splice card in standard isn’t out of the question if we have those other weird one-offs, the cyclings and flashbacks. But like, I know for a fact that this card’s probably not going to herald the return of a weird mechanic that I’ve still had trouble explaining to the kids. And yet, and yet! It’s just so fun and quite well-executed. Having a deck built around this card would be quite weird. What’re you gonna do? For five mana, I’m gonna Mystic Speculation/Shock every turn. What a twist.

Genuinely, I don’t think this card’s right for a standard environment, but I do want to commend it for pushing this contest to the absolute limit without going out of the bounds of realism. It’s phenomenally designed and equally silly. There’s all the radical complexity of Kamigawa with the silliness of the Akki and the thoughtfulness of how to design strange cards. I’m really happy that you submitted this.

~

@i-am-the-one-who-wololoes​ — Necroprankster

Contrary to the Shock above, there’s no way in hell that Exhume is coming back to standard. It’s one of the most powerful reanimation spells ever printed, and at common, it wouldn’t see the light of day. As a rare? Perhaps. This card could have gone with Unearth (the card) and I would have been far more receptive to it; after all, this card’s three mana, Unearth can see it, you can kinda chain them together, yadda yadda.

Aside from THAT little piece, though, I think this card’s actually really good! The concept of choices and control and potential unearthing (heh) is really neat. It’s an uncommon that cares about relevant commons in an archetype that matters, it’s small but powerful, it doesn’t overstay its welcome with its ETB, and I really like the name. There’s that modern-Grimm feel to it that was a little more popular in the 00’s but hell, I like it all the same, you know? I’ll be honest, between the name and flavor text, I almost don’t need art direction. Not bad, captain.

~

@just--a--penguin — Foolhardy Excavator

I kind of want to know your thought process behind bringing back a bulk common from Onslaught into a standard-legal contest. I want to say firstly: I can see how this card would be incredibly good in, like, a limited format where there’s morph/manifest and there needs to be hate for it. That much I get. And you know what, I’m gonna pause my own tirade, because in terms of creative expressions, I can see the implications of new environments with new mechanics and old cards, and that’s fine. That’s another part of this whole contest I’m learning to appreciate.

Couple important things: For one, the first ability needs to shuffle, which you might’ve just forgotten, and that’s fine. For two, “foolhardy” probably isn’t the best term here. Look at the second ability you’ve made. This excavator, whoever they are, is here to deal damage. Maybe they’re foolhardy to us, but who are they in the grand scheme of things? They’re forceful, blunt, barbaric, and there aren’t any consequences befalling them. Adjective choice matters for polish. I feel that this card could be pretty fun until you turn-four break open their 8-drop beast. Whoops.

~

@lich-of-the-golgari​ — Venser’s Last Will

Firstly, this contest specified that the card to which you were referencing was supposed to be a common. Please ensure that you read all the contest requirements carefully. In the future, submissions that don’t follow Fair criteria may be ineligible.

From a story perspective, I’m struggling to find the sense of this card. Venser didn’t have a will, nor did he know he was going to perish on Mirrodin. The “last of his legacy” was the spark he gave to Karn, arguable. Mechanically, the wording is missing the shuffle clause, and the replacement effect should be “once each turn” and also be a trigger of sorts; how is this restriction checked without a “may” clause? The bottom line is that this card does not encourage the kind of cohesive deckbuilding we were looking for with this contest. 

~

@little-red-rabbit​ — Squadron Falconer

Everyone loves Squadron Hawk! Except my kids when I play against them, but that’s a whole other story. The point is, Squadron Hawk is great and I think the name you chose is awesome. There are a couple small mechanical things we’ll go for afterwards, but just to close out the good things, I think the idea of this guy being...carried? By the hawks? It makes mechanical sense, even if it is a touch silly, heh. I really like the way he forces an answer to the hawks. It does feel slightly redundant since the hawks can already search for themselves; perhaps consider a benefit to the birds as opposed to the falconer themself?

The first ability needs a shuffle clause, which is always important when you’re searching. The second ability has, er, some extra words that might have been left over? I believe it should be worded “As long as you control two or more creatures named Squadron Hawk, Squadron Falconer has flying.” There we go. 

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@nine-effing-hells​ — Igniter of Horizons

Great balls o’ fire. Can cards...DO that? “...if it was put onto” etc.? I honestly don’t know the precedent. This card seems kind of fun, actually, and I wonder what the design space for cards like that it. Like a card that has an effect if it was milled by card X or whatever, exile it from your graveyard, big buff. Maybe. Anyway, dragons though! I think that Dragon’s Approach is versatile enough to be reprinted basically everywhere. I know that I have a kid whose M.O. is dragons, and he’d love to see this card. To be fair, he’d love to see any dragon. I suppose that if you’re going to build the deck casually, this is the card you’d be going for, right? There aren’t too many other cards you’d really want if you’re that dead-set.

I’m not going to check the wording on your card there. I assume that the shift from the targets to “permanents and/or players” checks out. Trample is a fun one there. As a body by itself, the card is good, and as a Dragon’s Approach payoff, it’s also pretty fun. I’m a little curious about the name? Not sure what you’re going for there, but it’s really cool, actually. Maybe there’s an explanation I missed, maybe not. Point is, card’s decent, does what it says. Is it any better than a better dragon like, I’unno, Ancient Copper? Obviously not but we don’t talk about that. It cares about what it wants to care about. Ooh, maybe if there was one for each archetype...

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@noodlegirl-googlyeyes — Counterspellatog

So we did talk in the workshop about the potential for cards that cared about your opponents’ cards instead of your own, and I was iffy about the idea because this contest was more about the deckbuilding fun than, like, pure hate/interaction. Seeing this card, I still don’t know how to feel; I WANT to feel a little more justified, because wow, Atogs are a nuisance, but maybe not. Then I think about how this card’s implying that Counterspell will be in standard and I feel a little less iffy about my position. The fact is that, until the tides change immensely, Counterspell’s just not coming back to standard, and that’s what that’s.

I think the name’s just past the edge of silly, too, but it doesn’t make it not fun to say. I also do want to note that if you just have effects that put counters on things, this card works just fine. Still, it’s...a sideboard card at most and awkward most often. Just not quite the kind of thing we were thinking about for this contest. What a throwback, though. Through this contest we really get to see the personality of players and the ways in which they express what they think is cool. This is no exception.

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@railway-covidae — Persistent Farmer (JUDGE PICK)

This card technically isn’t eligible because it’s a common itself and you were supposed to be designing for uncommon and up, but that’s an easy mistake to make and/or an easy fix. Sometimes there’s grace. For this farmer, there’s none. Let’s get two small templating things out of the way first. With the mana ability, milling should be part of the cost. Maybe it was intentional that it wasn’t, but Millikin implies otherwise as to how it should be. With the return ability, I think it needs to target? There’s no reason why it shouldn’t and it’s important that it does for stack reasons and whatever.

But the rest of this card’s really, REALLY cool. This peasant is a menace. He’s a mana dork (definitely not common) where you can build around that graveyard theme... Hey, haven’t we been here before, but differently? NGL, it’s funny to me that there were two Innistradian cards based around the G/B graveyard-filling archetype that I really liked this week despite only having played that in limited once. Anyway, casual players who like filling the yard will absolutely love this card. Mulch is fun, the grossness is just creepy enough not to be directly off-putting unless you’re crazy squeamish, and I’m glad Mulch got some love. Very fun.

~

@real-aspen-hours​ — Wastes Tender

Sorry, didn’t quite have the time to mock this one up. Anyway, this card’s missing ooooone small thing. Do you remember what it is? .... Time’s up! That’s right, the Eldrazi with colored symbols in their costs need (and I say “need,” I mean that in the metaphysical sense more than rules) the ability Devoid to make ‘em colorless. Womp. That said, this card’s awesome as a ramp spell. I think that the Wastes players will like that. Wastes was a great archetype! Very strange environment, ngl, but all the same.

This card is definitely from a different era, but if Arboreal Grazer can have its day, then so can the Wastes Tender. I mean, I would have liked a slightly less Waste-y name and you could drop the “far” from the flavor text, but the mood you’re going for is actually super cool. Indeed, a “perversion of growth” comes across in both the mechanics and the card’s overall feel; from the wastes grow more nothing, more horror, the Scions of tomorrow. Not bad, not bad.

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@reaperfromtheabyss​ — Commando Consecrator

Of all the cards to pick for this contest, I genuinely did not expect Cathar Commando to be among them. Honestly, I really like how this card plays as a rare! Even if you don’t have the other Commandos (and if you’re P1P1 going for this, you’re gonna get some), returning a small creature is just as awesome. Humans, sacrifice, and spirits alike will enjoy that ETB, and it’s an on-curve beater at the very least. Cathar Commando, though, huh.

The only question is flavor weirdness. Sort of. How do angels on Innistrad go about their tactics? The Commando is depicted as being borderline dishonorable, or at least a little gruesome when it comes to executing her prey. Why would they want to be consecrated? Or need to, either. Perhaps it’s a small blessing, that it’s a gift because the angels are returning them. No matter. The point is, I suppose, that Angels and Soldiers have that kind of relationship, and that’s okay. Gotta say, I’m a fan of Commando as a card. Flashing in a first-striker and maybe getting it back with another Consecrator later is pretty good! Pretty decent stuff. I think that whether or not someone’s going to build a deck is a little up in the air, but for limited, this card’s pretty great.

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@snugz​ — Eager Whelp

Ey, another Dragon’s Approach card. This one is definitely a little different, but I think it’s still pretty good. The expectations of the body-to-cost ratio is fine, and having a phoenix-like body swinging in is pretty great. If you search for this card using the Approaches, you’ll have an 8/2 flying hasty dragon! That’s pretty good, if a little weak for its cost. If you don’t get any DA’s in limited, then you’re kind of out of luck, but then it raises the question of how many dragons-to-Approaches are you running for cards like this to be worth it.

If you really want to go balls to the wall in standard, then I can see this card being pretty good even if the toughness leaves a lot to be desired. You know, I should be thinking of Arena, too, even though the mere notion fills me with...shuddering. I kid, though, I kid; I guess there’s the question of whether or not that easy casual environment would be down to get these sorts of cards. Maybe it’s a little late to be thinking of that crucible, but regardless. I would feel bad if my awesome dragon ended up getting Shock’d to death by the goblins deck after all the setup I had put into it, but the feeling is certainly solid.

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@squeezyboi — Spell Piercer

So...yeah, unfortunately, this card’s not eligible either. I really should have checked some of these beforehand. Again, the actual, physical, other card had to be named and referenced, not just alluded to by the name. Card’s basically fine, maybe two mana, “its” not “it’s.” But I can’t give further critique in the same vein. The workshop’s here in Discord to ensure you’re on the right path, and double-check the contest requirements.

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@stareyedesper​ — Bloodthirsty Sadist

That’s certainty a card name. I think that there’s something to be said for the sadism of vampires on Innistrad or otherwise, and it makes sense here. Dead Weight was an awesome card and I know its got some awesome limited hype around it. This card does indeed feel like it was made for limited, or for friends to build specific decks against each other. But getting an on-color aura’s still important, yeah? Flavor’s pretty good, and from a balance perspective, it’s really specific but I still feel the mana cost could be upped or the toughness could be ticked down just by one, perhaps. It’s way strong in the right matchup.

The wording feels a little off. Let me see... “When ~ enters the battlefield, search your library or graveyard for a card named Dead Weight, reveal it, then shuffle. If an opponent controls a Human, you may attach that card to that Human. Otherwise, put it into your hand.” The term “add it to your hand” is erroneous, and “Human” needs to be capitalized at all times. There are a couple mechanical differences with targeting, but you can take it or leave it.

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 @wolkemesser​ — Vincent, Pit Gourmand (JUDGE PICK)

Every week. Every week, I’m either picking apart wording like I’m getting cat hair off a black dress with your cards, or I’m astounded by the new weirdness you’ve presented and there’s so much to talk about. Well! I’m not gonna look a gift demon in the mouth. This card is awesome. This is the PAYOFF for all those Shadowborn Apostles, the demon for which one searches, and following that, the rest of the deck is indeed full of Shadowborns ready to be eaten, which helps in deck construction. Yes! That’s the way to do it.

I’m almost positive the last replacement should only look at spells and abilities your opponents control, but that’s not too bad, all things considered, and the control deck that you can run with this is nasty if gone unanswered. Everyone sacrifice things! I’m just gonna throw an old piece of meat away. Jeez... I want to say that this card feels too weird to really be viable, and that’s what my brain says, but as a design exercise, hell, we’ve seen weirder, and who knows! Maybe I’m overreacting. I probably am. Fantastic job with a staggeringly powerful creature. This is how to do Shadowborn right.

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@yd12k​ — Gnawbone, the Infestation

I’m not sure what to make of this second ability. The deathtouch is fine, and I like the last ability. Here’s the thing, though: cascade is absolutely useless. The reason is that every card in your deck, with Relentless Rats, is gonna want to be Relentless Rats. So what are you going to cascade into? What’s the standard format where Relentless Rats, this Kamigawa legend, and the ability cascade are all going to be together?

This card seems like it could be fun on the surface but ultimately the elements all clash with one another in a way that’s either mechanically disruptive or flavorfully not-quite-meshed. Relentless Rats (which, FWIW, was only common for one set, and for good reason in my opinion) was a brave choice and I understand the desire to make that cool stuff happen. This isn’t the card you want to go for with it, I don’t think.

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Phew. Tune in next week. Bring a friend. @abelzumi​

[ask-steven-stevenson]

“I’m okay!! Again. No need to worry for me! See? I’m alright. Truly. I get you both care.. I can take care of myself.”

“Oh. Yeah. Get the fuck out, Steven.”

[HELP. Jake literally CARRIED Steven out.]

[DW!! I mod magic’d the bucket away!]

//ALRIGHT IM FREE TO HARRASS MY DAD NOW I WAS TRAPPED SOMEWHERE ❤️

he!!!!! walks in!!!!! hes human!!!!! yippee!!!!! also sorry steven yoinking barley away for this one so you kinda just see and identical copy of the human form of your son steal him away from you.

hey dad. whatcha up to?

//@the-flys-buzz (THATS ENOUGH LETS GET YOU HOME STARTED PLAYING AS I WAS TYPING THIS WHAT IF I BROKE DOWN INTO TEARS)

[[HEL. WELCOME BACK !!]]

[HELP. He saw that. He’s.. concerned and.. worried..??? But he’ll worry about it later. Maybe. He wants HIS EMPLOYEE BACK.]

“Oh? Hello. What do you need? Are you alright?”

[awe. He sounds so worried about his son 💔💔💔.]