#her stuff is definitely more difficult for me to work with
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Bluebell playlist but it's all just awful dubstep bc she's a gamer
#for real though half considering giving her prototype vip bc that's still a good song after all this time#her stuff is definitely more difficult for me to work with#holly is just gonna be like. ''normie'' music; envisioning some lenka maybe? someone here is getting marina and the diamonds#someone is getting i am not a robot and i haven't decided who yet; actually probs iris bc ''can you teach me how to feel (real)?''#heather and primadonna wait hang on we're cooking actually#everyone gets one (1) obnoxious pop song. heather gets a lot of them#i could actually probably assign them all marina songs hsfjkhg i have. stuck with her discography for a while lmao#or yknow. creator assigned miku songs lmao#shai speaks#oc tag
1 note
·
View note
Text
Imagine an adult Yuu who arrived at Twisted Wonderland PREGNANT.
This could be considered part of the Yuu! Parent variables (?). Perhaps the poor woman was returning from an early ultrasound (at 2 or 3 months old) when the black carriage hit her, scaring her to death upon her appearance in TWST. She must have thought she was about to be sacrificed to a cult.
I can definitely imagine the Squad characters being much more understanding/soft of this Yuu, especially Ace and Deuce. Ace wouldn't be so malicious at the beginning of the game (I'd like to believe that not even he would be capable of laughing in the face of a pregnant woman), and instead feels obvious guilt because Crowley has entrusted her with a mediocre job.
Deuce, my sweet boy, will set off all his alarm bells. He's the most outraged that the headmaster is forcing a pregnant woman to work ALONE, and if his dorm leader hadn't been so strict in the beginning, he definitely wouldn't let Yuu sleep in a dorm that's falling apart. Has Crowley gone crazy? Does he have no shred of decency?!
Grim probably thought at first that Yuu had eaten her baby, haha, and had to receive the wonderful "birds and the bees" lecture (much to Ace's amusement at Grim's horrified reactions). Let's just say Grim now insists on standing sentry in case Yuu decides to do anything too "dangerous for the baby" (humans are fragile even with magic; he has to take care of his minion!).
Jack, bless him, also tries to help make the ramshackle dorm safer alongside Epel, whether by removing the most rotten parts of the structure, helping clean, assisting with Yuu's errands, etc. Especially when she starts showing more of her bump.
GOD, IMAGINE THE DORM LEADERS!
Riddle was probably the only one who didn't realize Yuu was pregnant until the events of the Savanaclaw episode. And when he found out he almost seriously hurt a PREGNANT WOMAN? Trey and Cater practically had to keep him from banging his head against a wall for half an hour out of embarrassment and shame. He also drafted a LONG apology for Yuu, which was delivered with a giant strawberry cake (and one of those exaggerated bows I KNOW Riddle would do).
Thanks to his mom (for once in his life), Riddle is the most knowledgeable about useful pregnancy stuff! Whenever Yuu goes to Heartslabyul, she has access to calcium- and iron-rich meals (prepared by Trey), and teas that boost her immune system and combat morning sickness. Riddle is careful not to give her things like black tea or rosemary tea, knowing they could have negative effects (if it were up to Riddle, Yuu probably wouldn't walk unaided).
Leona is much more respectful to a female Yuu, we know that, but I don't think he has the energy to be rude, or be especially , well, Leona, to a PREGNANT woman. This ends up bringing out a side of Leona no one thought existed: an almost delicate side. Sure, he's still lazy and sarcastic, but he doesn't say no to Yuu when she asks for help with something, whether it's bringing something to her dorm or dealing with a difficult situation. he dosent even COMPLAIN. what did he do to the real Leona??
We all know Crowley doesn't give Yuu and Grim enough money to live comfortably, let alone considering they could soon have a new member on ramshakle. Yuu is now surprised to find extra money in the dorm after certain visits. Not that he'll admit it, but it makes everyone feel more at ease.
Again, I want to believe Azul wouldn't be capable of leaving a pregnant woman homeless, at the very least he offered her a place to stay in Octavinelle. It turns out the twins (especially Floyd) quickly took a liking to Yuu.
A cute scenario I came up with, when Yuu already has a prominent baby bump, is that she tries to joke with the Leechs that the nickname "shrimpy" doesn't suit her anymore, and that maybe they should change it to "whaley."
AND FLOYD IS LIKE, "Why are you saying that, Koebi-chan? :( Is someone calling you that? Come on, tell me :)"
I think the Octavinelle folks genuinely don't know how human pregnancy works, so they're surprisingly gentle and caring with Yuu (even when the baby is born, I can see Monster Lounge having a kids' menu for them).
Kalim, my god, Jamil is going to have to stop him from giving Yuu a completely equipped nursery for both her and the baby. Ironically, the one who's the most normal about pregnancy (the guy has 30 younger siblings, so he KNOWS about these things) and genuinely knows some home tricks that helped his mother when she was pregnant.
offers to organize a baby shower/gender reveal party! The bad thing is that it ends up being a whole festival with all of Scarabia participating. But hey, it's the thought that counts.
There's no way Yuu, who's already 6-7 months along, will wear the school uniform simply for comfort, so if you need help finding comfortable AND cute clothes, Vil will gladly help! Obviously, he's not as strict or harsh with Yuu due to the circumstances, but he still wants the best for her. Who knows, maybe they can pick out some clothes for the baby in advance.
Idia is afraid to get close to Yuu, not only because of social anxiety, but because of the thought that he might "ruin" the baby in some way. He needs a lot of support from Ortho and Yuu to even allow himself to have normal physical contact with Yuu, and just as he does, the baby kicks. Idia's heart is gone (everyone wants to feel the kicks now, especially Ace, Floyd, and Malleus).
They probably use some STYX or Ortho equipment for some of the baby checks, and he even gives an approximate due date, which feels bittersweet. Even if everyone does their best, Yuu still hoped to have his baby at home, but he doesn't complain when the boys do all this for them. It feels like Home.
Malleus is another who doesn't fully understand human pregnancy and is incredibly intrigued. It doesn't help that Lilia's answers to his questions are even more confusing, so he ends up going straight to the source of his intrigue, Yuu. Malleus is completely mesmerized the first time he hears the baby's heartbeat, completely fascinated by what human life is like compared to fairies/dragons.
That said, he proceeds to "scold" the baby when it kicks Yuu for "hurting its mother," not quite understanding the concept, but he has the spirit. Malleus is very scared of the idea of childbirth once he's educated on it (WHERE will the baby come out? HOW!?) and will probably try to improve his healing magic SOLELY because of that.
All I can say is that if the baby is born in Twisted Wonderland, they'll have a wide array of adoptive siblings, father figures, babysitters, and weird and eccentric uncles who will take very good care of them and its mother. So you can rest easy.
__________
(ESPAÑOL)
Imagínate una Yuu adulta que llego a Twisted Wonderland estando EMBARAZADA
Esto podría considerarse parte de las variables de Yuu! Parent(?)Talvez la pobre mujer estaba regresando de un ultrasonido de los primeros meses (2 o 3 meses) cuando el carruaje negro le paso por encima, dándole un susto de muerte cuando apareció en TWST. La pobre mujer debio pensar que estaba a punto de ser sacrificada a un culto.
Definitivamente puedo ver a los personajes del Squad mucho mas suaves con esta Yuu, especialmente Ace y Deuce. Ace no sería tan malicioso al principio del juego (digo, quiero creer que incluso el no seria capaz de reírse en la cara de una mujer embarazada) y más bien siente una obvia lastima de que Crowley le haya metido en un trabajo mediocre.
Deuce, mi dulce niño, le disparan todas las alarmas. Es el más obviamente indignado de que el director haga trabajar a una mujer embarazada SOLA, y definitivamente si su líder de dormitorio no fuera tan estricto al principio, no dejaría que Yuu durmiera en un dormitorio que se cae a pedazos ¿¡que acaso Crowley perdió la cabeza, no tiene el mínimo de decencia?!
Grim probablemente al principio pensó que Yuu se había comido a su bebe lol, y le tuvieron que dar la maravillosa charla de las “aves y las abejas” (para diversión de Ace por las reacciones horrorizadas de Grim). Solo digamos que ahora Grim insiste en actuar como centinela en caso de que Yuu se le ocurra hacer algo demasiado “peligroso para él bebe” (los humanos son frágiles aun si magia ¡tiene que cuidar a su secuaz!).
Jack, bendito sea, también trata de ayudar en hacer el dormitorio destartalado mas seguro junto a Epel, ya sea quitando las partes mas podridas de la estructura, ayudando a limpiar, ayudar con los mandados de Yuu, etc. Especialmente cuando empieza a mostrar mas la panza de embarazada.
DIOS, IMAGINENSE LOS LIDERES DE DORMITORIO.
Riddle probablemente fue el único que no llego a darse cuenta que Yuu estaba embarazada hasta los eventos del capítulo de Savanaclaw ¿y cuando se enteró que casi lastimo gravemente a una MUJER EMBARAZADA? Trey y Cater tuvieron que físicamente detenerlo de que se golpeara la cabeza contra la pared por media hora por la vergüenza, también redacto un documento LARGUISIMO de disculpa a Yuu, que fue entregado con una gran tarta de fresa (y una de esas reverencias exageradas que SE que Riddle haría).
¡Gracias a su madre (por una vez en la vida), Riddle es el que sabe más de cosas útiles para el embarazo! Cada vez que Yuu va Heartslabyul, tienen acceso a comidas nutritivas en calcio y hierro (hechas por Trey), Tés beneficiosos para el sistema inmune y para combatir las náuseas matutinas, aparte de que Riddle es cuidadoso de no dar cosas como Te negro o romero, sabiendo que podrían tener malos efectos (si fuera por Riddle, Yuu probablemente no caminaría sin ayuda).
Leona es bastante más respetuoso con una Yuu mujer, eso lo sabemos, pero no creo que tenga la energía para ser grosero o especialmente, bueno, Leona, con una mujer EMBARAZADA. Esto termina sacando un lado que nadie creía que existía de Leona, un lado casi delicado. Claro, sigue siendo perezoso y sarcástico, pero no le dice que no a Yuu cuando le pide ayuda en algo, ya sea llevar algo a su dormitorio o con una situación difícil.
Todos sabemos que Crowley no da ni de lejos el dinero suficiente para que Yuu y Grim vivan bien, mucho menos pensando que PODRIAN TENER UN NUEVO INTEGRANTE PRONTO, por lo que Yuu ahora se sorprende después de ciertas visitas, aparece algo de dinero extra en el dormitorio. No es como que lo vaya a admitir, pero todos están más tranquilos de esa forma.
De nuevo, quiero creer que Azul no sería capaz de dejar sin hogar a una mujer embarazada, aunque sea le ofrecería una estancia en Octaville, ya que, además, resulta que los gemelos (especialmente Floyd) se encariñaron con Yuu muy rápido.
Un escenario lindo que se me ocurrió, ya cuando Yuu tiene una panza de embarazada prominente, es que ella trata de bromear con los Leech de que el apodo “camarón” ya no le queda bien, y que a lo mejor tendrían que cambiarlo a “ballena”
Y FLOYD ESTA COMO “¿Por qué dices eso Koebi-chan? ¿alguien te está diciendo asi? Vaaaamos, dímelo ”
Creo que genuinamente los de Octaville no saben muy bien cómo funciona el embarazo terrestre, por lo que son sorprendentemente gentiles y cuidadosos con Yuu (incluso cuando nace el bebe, puedo ver el Monstre Louge teniendo un menú infantil para ellos).
Kalim, dios mio, Jamil tendrá que detenerlo de regalarle a Yuu absolutamente toda una guardería completamente equipada tanto para ella como para el bebe. Irónicamente el que es el mas normal al respecto del embarazo (el man tiene 30 hermanos menores, el SABE de estas cosas) y genuinamente sabe algunos trucos caseros que le sirvieron a su madre cuando ella estaba embarazada.
¡ofrece organizar un baby shower/ fiesta de revelación de genero! Lo malo es que termina siendo todo un festival en el que participa todo Scarabia. Pero hey, la intención es lo que cuenta.
No hay forma en la que estando ya en los 6-7 meses Yuu use el uniforme de la escuela por simple cuestión de comodidad, por lo que si necesitan ayuda en encontrar ropa cómoda Y bonita ¡Vil le ayudara con gusto! Obviamente no es tan estricto ni duro con Yuu debido a las circunstancias, pero sigue queriendo lo mejor para ella. Quien sabe, talvez puedan elegir algo de ropa para él bebe de adelantado.
Idia tiene miedo de acercarse a Yuu, no solo por la ansiedad social, sino por la idea de que podría “arruinar” al bebe de alguna forma. Necesita mucho apoyo de Ortho y Yuu para siquiera permitirse tener contacto físico con Yuu de forma normal, y justo cuando lo hace, el bebe patea. A Iidia se le salió el alma del cuerpo (ahora todos quieren sentir las pataditas, sobretodo Ace, Floyd y Malleus).
Probablemente usan algo de equipo de STYX o Ortho para algunos controles del bebe, incluso el da una fecha aproximada de nacimiento, lo cual da una sensación agridulce. Aun si todos hacen su mejor esfuerzo, Yuu esperaba poder tener a su bebe en casa, pero no se queja cuando los chicos hacen todo esto por ellos.
Malleus es otro que no entiende el embarazo humano completamente y esta increíblemente intrigado, no ayuda que as respuestas de Lilia a sus preguntas son aún más confusas, por lo que termina lleno a la fuente de su intriga, Yuu. Malleus se queda completamente hipnotizado la primera vez que escucha los latidos del bebe, totalmente fascinado por cómo es la vida humana en comparación a las hadas/dragones.
Eso sí, procede a “reprender” al bebe cuando patea a Yuu por “lastimar a su madre”, no entendiendo bien el concepto, pero tiene el espíritu. A Malleus le asusta mucho la idea del parto una vez que se educa al respecto (¿Qué el bebe saldrá DE DONDE? ¡¿COMO!?) y probablemente trate de mejorar en magia curativa UNICAMENTE por eso.
Solo puedo decir que si el bebe nace en Twisted Wonderland, tendrá un vasto abanico de hermanos adoptivos, figuras paternas, niñeros, tíos raros y extravagantes que lo cuidaran muy bien a él y su madre. Así que pueden estar tranquilos.
Shares, reblogs and comments are very welcome!
#headcanons#fem reader#twisted wonderland x mc#disney twisted wonderland x reader#twisted wonderland yuu#disney twisted wonderland#twst yuu#yuu! parent#yuu! mom#platonic twst#twst x reader#disney twst#twst wonderland#twst#twisted wonderland#riddle rosehearts#leona kingscholar#azul ashengrotto#kalim al asim#vil schoenheit#idia shroud#malleus draconia#twst grim#ace trappola#deuce spade#jack howl#epel felmier#español#spanish#pregnant!Yuu
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Happy Accident part 3
Pairing: Congressman Bucky x pregnant!girlfriend reader
These can be read as oneshots, but if you want to read in order, check out below ⬇️
Part one | Part two | Part three | Part four | Part five | Epilogue
Word count: 1.3k
Content: smut, p in v sex, oral (f receiving)
Synopsis: Bucky and his girlfriend get an ultrasound and go home to spend some quality spicy time together.
Churning these out like butter. Hope you enjoy!
“How does our little guy look?” Bucky asks, eyeing the ultrasound technician.
“Wiggly right now,” she replies with a laugh. “But I’ll get a lot of pictures for you guys. We check over all of the baby’s anatomy at the 20 week scan.”
“I can’t believe we’re halfway there,” Bucky says, brushing your hair behind your ear. “I can’t wait to meet him.”
“Me too,” you say with a smile.
“Oh, look, there’s a good view of his face,” the ultrasound tech says, pointing to the grainy screen. “Let me put that in 3D so you can see better.” She pushes a few buttons on the machine and suddenly the picture changes to include more detail. Wow. Truly a mini Bucky.
“He’s so cute already,” you muse, looking up at Bucky. “He looks like his daddy.” Bucky squeezes your hand and you see his Adam’s apple bob in his throat. He’s holding back tears, but you don’t say anything, letting him enjoy the moment. The ultrasound tech continues her exam, confirms that the baby is definitely a boy, and you are sent on your way back to the waiting room before meeting with your doctor. It’s mid-July, and you see the heat waves rising off of the pavement in the parking lot through the office windows. Being pregnant in this heat was no joke, but Bucky has been doing everything to make you as comfortable as possible. He truly was the perfect boyfriend and was going to be an even more amazing dad. After your doctor’s appointment, you head home. You had both taken the whole day off of work for the appointment and to go shopping for baby stuff. Who knew that baby’s came with so much gear? Cribs, bouncers, swings… your place was going to be full of this stuff for years.
Bucky opens the front door for you while gazing at you darkly. That devilish look can only mean one thing. You feel heat rise up your thighs to your core. Bucky has always loved your body from the start of your relationship, but now that you are carrying his baby, he worships every inch of you. Relentlessly. Your hormones are already running on high, but knowing how much he needs you sends you over the edge. You are both so hungry for each other all of the time. As soon as he shuts the front door behind him, his hands are on you. On your bare thighs. The man loves sundress season. His flesh hand finds the edge of your underwear, and he swipes them to the side to rub slow circles around your clit.
“Yes,” you encourage him with a sigh while unbuttoning his pants. “Let’s go to our room,” you suggest. You lead him upstairs to your bedroom.
“Lie down, baby. Let me take care of you,” Bucky whispers, lifting your dress above your head. You start to unhook your bra, and remove it slowly, letting your full breasts come free. His pupils dilate even more at the sight. You lie back on the bed in just your underwear and watch Bucky undress at the foot of the bed. He removes his boxers and you bite your lip at the sight of him hard and ready for you. He crawls up from the bottom of the bed to you, hooking his fingers through your underwear and pulling them down your legs, tossing them over his shoulder. He places the tiniest kiss on your lower tummy before moving down and kissing your inner thighs. You used to love watching Bucky eat you out, but the past couple of months have made that difficult with your growing belly. You prop yourself up on your elbows and look down at him as you feel his tongue lapping into your core.
“You taste so sweet, baby girl,” he growls, looking up at you to meet your gaze and smiling lazily. You reach down to touch his face, silently inviting him up to you. He crawls up to lie down beside you, cupping one of your breasts with his vibranium hand. You feel goosebumps raise on your skin at the cool touch. You turn to kiss him and taste your arousal on his mouth. “I need to feel you, Buck,” you whisper into his mouth. You feel his cock twitch against your thigh at the comment. Certain positions are getting trickier with pregnancy, so you’ve been trying new things lately. You turn on your side so your back is against Bucky’s chest. The heat from his body against your back feels amazing. He guides himself gently inside of you and pumps in and out slowly and languidly, like you have all of the time in the world. His hand reaches down between your clenched thighs and finds your clit once again. “You feel so good, love,” he whispers into your hair. You let out another moan and put your hand over his, helping him find the perfect rhythm to circle your sweet spot. The tension starts to build between your legs, and you whine. “I can feel you squeezing me,” he says, kissing your neck.
“Don’t stop,” you encourage him. “I’m so close.” You reach behind you to grab his ass and press him deeper inside of you. He lets out a groan of pleasure and keeps up his delicious pace. His other hand makes its way to the base of your skull, fingers spreading into your hair and pulling gently so your neck is taut and bare. You feel his soft lips meet the hollow of your neck and his bites gently before exhaling. The sensation of his breath on your bare, sensitive skin is what sends you over the edge. You cry out his name as your orgasm ripples through you. Bucky doesn’t stop, letting you ride it out on him. As you come down from your high, you scoot away from him slightly so he’s not inside of you anymore.
“Mmm, come back,” he whines, reaching for you. You straddle one leg over him and he lays flat on his back. You feel his cock pressing at your entrance. “This is a great fucking view,” he says, gesturing to you straddling him. “Look at you,” he whispers, palming your breasts and trailing his hands down to your tummy. You start to ride on him, but don’t put it in yet. He grabs your hips and grounds you down into him harder, groaning. You put your hands on his chest and lift yourself slightly so he can put it in. You sit back down until you’re full of him.
“Fuck,” you whimper. It always felt so big when you were on top. You start to rock your hips back and forth. Bucky digs his fingertips into the flesh of your hips, pulling you into him even more.
“God, baby, you feel so good,” he says, “You look so pretty riding on my dick. Growing with my baby.” You love how much Bucky adores your baby bump. If he didn’t, you may feel self conscious from this angle. “You’re so fucking sexy.”
You reach behind you between his legs and gently grasp his balls while you ride him. He whimpers. You know just how much he loves it. You pick up speed and luxuriate in the sound of your intermingled pleasure: his moans, your breathiness, his hand slapping your ass motivating you.
“I need to feel all of you, Buck,” you breathe out.
“That’s all of it, baby,” he says with a laugh. You giggle in response.
“I mean I want you to cum in me. Please.” Almost at your command, you feel his warmth in your core at the same time he announces it.
Bucky sits up to kiss you, pulling you into his lap while he’s still inside you, “I’m going to take full advantage of the next few months and fill you up everytime. Don’t you worry.”
“I love you,” you say, nuzzling into his neck.
“I love you, too. Both of you. More than you’ll ever know,” he kisses the tip of your nose. “You want me to draw you a bath?”
“Mmm, that sounds amazing,” you reply. Bucky stands up and scoops you up into his arms, carrying you to the bathroom, blissed out and totally in love.
Check out part four here.
#bucky barnes#winter soldier#james buchanan barnes#sebastian stan#congressman barnes#thunderbolts*#thunderbolts#bucky smut#bucky barnes smut#bucky fic#daddy bucky#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky x female reader#bucky x you
354 notes
·
View notes
Note
Rafe visiting sweetheart pogue reader after knowing her better at her little bake shop she works at and they get to talking and she confesses its her absolute dream to open and run her own bake shop and he buys her a little cute shack to start her business off !!! 💕💕
warnings: super sweet fluff, sexual tension that rafe has to force himself not to act on
a/n: this came out longer than i wanted it to, but i loveeee writing for pogue!sweetheart!reader so much, pls send reqs for her if you’d like <3
it was a rather slow day at the icecream shop, so when you heard that little ding! indicating that someone had walked in, you were more than happy to see none other than rafe. “hey!” you chirped, adjusting the pink apron that currently hugged your waist.
“are you the only one working?” he walked up to the counter, your bright smile making his heart beat wildly in his chest. “yeah..” you trailed off, looking over to your manager’s office, “maybe i could ask for a quick break so we could talk?” rafe nodded. “i’d like that.”
he waited until you disappeared before he flipped the ‘open’ sign to ‘closed’ and turned the small lock on the door, so you two could converse without any interruptions. “okay!” you walked back up front. “favorite flavor?” rafe’s mind went blank as you reached for something, your skirt riding up your thighs as you did so.
“uhm- uh, rocky road is good.” you finally grasped the cups you were looking for, beaming at rafe’s response. “i love that one, too! but strawberry cheesecake has been my go to for a while now.” rafe didn’t want to make it obvious that he was staring hard, but he found that it was rather difficult when you were around him.
he couldn’t wrap his head around how someone so sweet and bubbly and charming as you are, could also be so unintentionally sexy at the same time. “rafe?” you snapped him out of his trance, a soft laugh leaving your lips. “here we are.” you walked around the counter, placing the cups of icecream down on a nearby table.
you reached behind you as rafe took a seat, your nails not allowing you to untie the knot you made in the strings of your apron. “what’s wrong?” he looked up at you in confusion. “my apron is a little stuck..” you turned, backing up until you stood been his legs. “can you untie this for me please? i just got my nails done and i did it a bit too tight.”
rafe was going insane. here you were in a mini skirt, potentially giving him a full view of everything that was underneath as you coyly waited for him to ‘help you out’. “sure, yeah-” he cleared his throat, hands coming up to fiddle with the strings that stopped just above the curves of your ass.
once he had it off, you sighed, taking the seat across from him. “where are you coming from?” rafe was still flustered when you took your spoon in your mouth, his eyes following the way your lips wrapped around the damned thing. “work, actually.” he blinked away, zeroing in all his focus elsewhere.
“really? what do you do?” now it was your turn to watch him, the veins on his arms making you lick your lips. “construction. it’s my dad’s business.” you nodded, trying to push the image of rafe all hot and sweaty from working outside, out of your head. “so you’re a handy man?” you teased, unintentionally tapping your foot against his leg.
“i know my way around.” you caught rafe looking at your lips, a shy smile taking over your feautures. “i wish i had those skills, it’d make things so much easier for me.” you raised your eyebrows. “how so?” he leaned forward. “well.. it might sound dumb, but it’s my dream to open my own little bakery. the problem is; i don’t know where to start, i don’t know who i have to get in contact with for licensing and permit stuff, and i definitely don’t know how to install any kind of kitchen appliances.”
rafe thought for a moment.
“do you have a certain location in mind?” he asked. you hummed, shaking your head. “no, i don’t care where it is. i’d just like a bigger space.” rafe nodded. “that doesn’t sound dumb by the way,” you looked up, “i think it’s neat that you want to open up your own business. the entire island will be over the moon once they find out they can get those chocolate chip cookies whenever they want.”
you had never shared that information with anyone, but by the way rafe responded, you were glad it was him that you spilled it to. rafe saw the small flash of sadness pass through your eyes before you shook it off. “one day..” just as you were about to check the time, your manager walk out of her office. “closing shop early today, do you mind helping me out real quick?” without hesitation, you got up from your seat.
“wait for me?” you gave rafe your icecream and apron to go outside with.
“of course.”
over the next two weeks, you found yourself by rafe’s side, whether he was following you around while you made sales, or helping you bake, you two seemed to be attached at the hip. “are you working tomorrow?” rafe currently sat on the floor of your camper, leaning against the lace-trimmed cushions of your pull out couch. “nope!” you offered him a spoon of buttercream to taste test, watching as he took his digit in his mouth.
“goddamn, that’s amazing,” rafe gave you a thumbs up, “but anyways— i was asking because i have a surprise for you.” placing the bowl of frosting on the counter, you turned. “oh?” you sat down, his head resting against the side of your knee. “i think you’ll really like it.” rafe kept his eyes down in his lap. “can i guess what it is?” he shook his head, “i won’t tell you if you’re right or wrong.”
sighing in defeat, you and rafe spent the rest of the night decorating cookies and taking turns shuffling songs until he was ready to head back home. “i’ll be here to pick you up in the morning, ‘that sound okay?” he was leaning against your doorframe, your fingertips itching to reach out for him. “mhmm, thank you for all your help today..” you stepped closer, swallowing thickly as he rested a hand in the curve of your neck.
even though rafe wanted to kiss you and feel your lips on his, he settled for a peck on your temple, which you were more than happy to receive. “goodnight, y/n.” he waved before getting in his truck and driving away. locking the door shut, you couldn’t help the pout that graced your lips at your now empty, quiet, camper.
eager to know what rafe wanted to surprise you with, you were quick to get ready for bed, forcing yourself to go to sleep before having to wake up and get ready.
“promise you’re not peeking?” you giggled, your hands resting on top of rafe’s as he guided you to some unknown location. “i promise!” finally, rafe came to a stop, a shiver running down your spine at the feeling of his body pressing against your backside.
“okay, go ahead and open.” you were buzzing with excitement, your mouth falling agape once your vision cleared. there, in front of you sat a perfect little shack, the word ‘sold’ on a red banner adorning the front. you blinked, slightly confused. “this is so cute! did you buy it or something?” rafe nodded, his mouth falling to your ear.
“it’s yours.”
you took a minute to process his words, letting go of a breath that you didn’t know you were holding. “rafe..” he placed his hands on your shoulders, turning you around. “a couple weeks ago you said it was your dream to have your own bakery but you didn’t know where to start, this is your starting point.” your eyes were watering now as you looked up at the man in front of you.
“i don’t think i can accept this.” you laughed, butterflies swarming your tummy when rafe wiped your tears. “you can, and you will.” you couldn’t hold back anymore, throwing your arms around him. rafe wasn’t used to this feeling in his chest, but he knew it felt right.
“it still needs to be renovated, but i talked to my dad and he agreed cameron development will cover everything.” you pulled away, dumbfounded. “i- why?” rafe’s eyebrows knitted in confusion. “why not? you deserve it.” sniffling, you looked back at the shack, already envisioning the place up and running. “i can’t thank you enough, rafe.” you couldn’t believe this was happening, couldn’t believe that rafe, let alone anyone, would do something like this for you.
“we’ll get to that later,” he winked, making you laugh, “should we go pick out a paint color?”
#❤︎₊ ⊹ works#₊˚⊹♡ rafe#₊˚⊹♡ pogue!sweetheart!reader#outer banks#outer banks smut#outer banks fanfiction#obx#obx fanfiction#obx smut#obx rafe#rafe cameron#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron prompt#rafe edit#rafe fluff#rafe outer banks#rafe x you#rafe fanfiction#rafe smut#rafe x reader#rafe imagine#rafe cameron fluff#drew starkey#rafe obx#rafe cameron imagine
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Going from "I'm not one of those trans people who do x or y" to "I am so one of those and I should have not judged them and I am glad that I got rid of the normative judgemental attitude I used to have".
Going from "I'm just a lesbian so liking trans men is wrong i don't want to deny their manhood" to "My sexuality is weird and that is fine, I like who I like despite the theoretical implications of it and I am not denying anyone's identity because I like them for who they are and respect them no matter what".
Going from "I'm just a regular binary she/her woman" to "I'm a girl and a woman but my dissociation and life experiences also make me feel impersonal so I can use it/its and I'm not weird for it, i wouldn't even be weird if I had no justification either, I can even use doll pronouns because I like them and they make me feel warm and happy and that is what matters".
Going from "Ok so these are all the labels with their very clear definitions and meanings and everything else is internet quirky stuff" to "I literally would not know how to explain what you are and I won't force you to explain it if you don't want, I don't need to understand it to accept you, you are valid and loved. If you instead want to explain it to me I'll do my best to learn and defend it whenever I can".
Going from "I am so sad, frustrated, angry and in pain because I will never be or look cis" to "I actually don't like the cis normative look, I don't want to cispass, I like trans beauty but specifically I like me beauty, the one where I am still myself but a more me version of myself. The world constantly told me what I should aspire to be and look like and like and I was brainwashed for so long but now I've broken free and am free to fully love myself and everyone else in this world who ever thought they were weird or ugly because my eyes find so much beauty in everything and everyone!"
Going from "Ew furries" to "I don't want to make fun of people who deviate from the norm because that is exactly what happens to me and we should all be together or else we are treating ourselves as exceptions and exceptions are easily revoked, I will learn to love everyone against a brain poisoned with conservativism and "normality". I like rats I should make a rat fursona or smth it would be so cute it'd so represent me :3".
Going from "I am useless, lazy, falling behind, a disappointment" to "I am physically and mentally disabled, there have never been accomodations for me in any aspect of my life and the intersectionalities of gender, sexuality, economical situation, etc. have made my life extremely difficult, I forgive myself for both failing and for blaming myself, I will seek help and advocate for myself to the best of my abilities and I will respect my limits in this world that was not made for people like me".
Learning is hard, changing is scary, but it's mostly just your brain being a conservative for the sake of commodity, safety and self-preservation, sometimes you need to fight your brain in a war of attrition but when you finally win you'll be so much happier.
I am so much happier now, my world is bigger and brighter and I see everyone and everything with a new, beautiful light. I look back on how I was and how I thought and how the world works and it all looks so much worse and grey, I am not going back there, this new mind is my home now.
And the best part is that I know I will keep learning more and changing more and the world and this life will keep getting better and better🥰.
736 notes
·
View notes
Text
𝐁𝐄𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐒
Summary: You play Soldier Boy's wife in the new movie. He's a method actor, and so are you.
Pairing: Soldier Boy / F! Reader
Warnings: +18! (Minors DNI), SMUT, Soldier Boy is cheating CC, rough sex, oral sex (m! receiving), kinda role playing, kinky, unprotected sex, dirty talk, porn without plot lol, set in late 1970's
Word Count: 3283
A/N: English is not my first language.
"Cut!"
Soldier Boy winked at you, pulled his lips back, and loosened his firm arms over your back as the director ordered. His hand continued to touch you daringly during the romantic scenes, so it must have been fun for him to witness your heart race. After licking your lips, you faced the director, who had been discussing the specifics with the rest of his staff.
With an anxious expression on his face, the director wanted to tell Soldier Boy something, but he was too scared to say anything since Soldier Boy wasn't the most sensible person when it came to providing guidance. Whatever was said to him didn't matter. Never.
The director then collected all of his stuff and gestured for you to join him. After taking the iced coffee, Soldier Boy turned to face the anxiously breathing and sweating director in front of him.
“Now what?” Sitting in the chair, Soldier Boy stretched out his muscles and asked in a harsh voice.
Soldier Boy became irate every time he was given instructions to act with greater enthusiasm and better, suggesting that the director, Mr. Nathan, must be dying of dread and worry.
“It's a romantic film,” Mr. Nathan remarked, appearing to become agitated as he brought up his hands on his hips. “And the subject at hand is war. It's meant to be intimate and heartfelt.”
“And?”
“You shouldn't behave as though you're going to have sex like you're in an adult film. I hope you don't take offense, sir. You're an excellent actor. However, would you mind being a bit more romantic? It would be quite beneficial.”
Snorting, Soldier Boy said, “Fuck that. A sentimental war film, huh? Jesus... I have no doubt that young soldiers would find greater use for pornographic films if we produced some. Believe me, If I fuck her and then leave her to join war, that would make women and men all cry their eyes out. Are we really making this trash movie for housewives only? Who approved this fucking script anyway?”
“Sure and no, sir—no, definitely not. I'm among those who approved, of course, and I can tell you that the script is excellent. Act a little more genuine. This is a movie that everyone should see. If you'd prefer, we could change the actress. If it would help you to be partners with Crimson Countess, maybe we can arrange that.”
The director looked at you, and you crossed your arms over your chest. Stupid coward. That would be the beginning of your best work, but his terrified ass was prepared to destroy your career before it had ever begun.
“Oh fuck no!” Soldier Boy gulped down his cold coffee. “Not her dry pussy coming over here. My co-star is talented and fine enough.”
You were going to defend yourself in front of the director, but luckily Soldier Boy was kind enough to stand up for you, which made things much better. You were giving him every indication that, in the end, you would do anything to get this job. You would never have taken part in a greater movie before, and Soldier Boy would be the ideal match for it. That was the top of your career already. He was attractive and interesting, but it was difficult to resist and melt into him at the moments when he was meant to give you a gentle kiss. Clearly, that wasn't his thing—being gentle and loving.
It wasn't your thing either.
Mr. Nathan sighed and answered, “Sure,” becoming tired of Soldier Boy not caring at all about what he was trying to say. “We're all going to have some break, and then we can go on filming, is that alright?”
“All right. Whatever,” Soldier Boy said. His specialty was not romantic war films, obviously. He sounded so corny in situations that you could be positive he detested every single love phrase he ever delivered. But none of you had the guts to tell him that out loud.
If he wasn't concerned about his acting in the first place, that didn't matter to you. There were times when you found it amusing that he was exaggerating in order to enrage the director. It was difficult for you to not break your character in these situations. The kissing scenes, however, were exceptional. You would have let him fuck you if he had made the move right then. He was only getting you wet with his tongue.
As soon as Mr. Nathan left, Soldier Boy stood up and stepped toward you, looking intently at you. Your entire body tingled with anticipation. Desire was already causing your legs to tremble.
With a low tone, he said, “Follow me,” and handed his empty cup to someone.
With joy, you followed instructions. You had already been thinking filthy stuff since the morning. Your pussy was swollen, and your underwear was already wet since he had been teasing you so much.
He locked the door when you followed him to his trailer.
He approached your body and looked at your long skirt before saying, “So,” and licked his lips. “What are you thinking about that guy who said that? About acting and anything else?”
As his thumb lingered on your breast, stroking it to make you go wild, you put your hands over his chest, excited about what was about to happen. Your thighs tensed with yearning.
Whispering, "He might be right," you ran a hand down his chest and felt his hardness through his trousers.
He smiled a bit at you when he realized you were ready for a quick fuck. You continued to softly touch him there, and his cock hardened.
With a sigh, “About?” he began to undo your dress so he could see your tits.
“About your acting,” you muttered as his harsh hand continued to torment you. “You should act more romantically and intimately.”
“Hmm,” was all he said.
He palmed both of your tits after he had finished unbuttoning your dress.
“I consider myself to be a method actor,” he said, grinning arrogantly at you.
You smirked and said, “What a coincidence; me too,” as you unzipped his pants. You lowered his pants and waited for him to give you guidance. “But what would your girlfriend, Crimson Countess, think about that?”
“I don't see an issue if you seal your pretty mouth. I also don't want to fuck her dry cunt forever. Now, get on your knees,” he said rudely, then, putting his hand behind your head, he pushed you on your knees.
Your pulse was pounding as you followed instructions. It wasn't that you were inexperienced, but it also wasn't that you were doing it for the first time. It had only lasted a minute or two until you had completed it in the past. It hadn't pleased you. You had immediately stopped.
You were ecstatic to see Soldier Boy's massive, pulsating cock, though. You wrapped your hands around his thick shaft, and you licked your dry lips, sensing its weight in your palm. It was exciting and tantalizing to consider sucking the strongest superhero on the planet.
You murmured, looking at his face and lightly brushing the tip with your lips, “What do you want me to do?” It was apparent that he was beginning to take pleasure in and enjoy what he was seeing. “Sir.”
He grinned at you and tightened his grasp behind your hair when he heard the final word, letting you know how weak you are in comparison to him. After all, you were both method actors, and the game you were playing was harmless. He was definitely thrilled.
He continued, taking his big cock in his hand and pressing it against your lips. “You're a naughty one, aren't you? About to be railed and excited to suck your co-star's cock. Not because you want to get the job, but simply to be fucked.”
“Maybe,” you said, licking the tip with your tongue. It didn't taste horrible, but it was salty. “Maybe I just want to get fucked by a supe; maybe it's because I want to keep my job.”
He finally lost patience with you and shoved his cock inside your mouth when you continued to tease him. You obeyed and took his cock in your mouth. You could take the head since his shaft was far too big for you, yet it was clear that he wanted more.
“Or perhaps I agree with the director's wish for my co-star to act more intimate in his part.” You teased him and palmed his heavy balls, adding, “Would you act more romantic just like you are expected if I was there, standing while your cum inside me?” You were certain that he would come early enough.
“You shouldn't worry about it. My cum will be flowing between your legs as you wander around,” he groaned. “But you'll suck that cock nice firstly.”
He pushed his cock into your mouth again before you could respond. You started to lick it by slowly getting used to the size of it before figuring out the right rhythm.
“Take it more,” he moaned, pressing your head on his cock. You were too aroused to resist, yet it was difficult to withstand his strength.
You attempted to take more of his throbbing cock by opening your mouth wider and placing your hands on his knees for assistance, but it was too huge.
“Fucking take it,” he snapped, annoyed by your poor attempt. Taking complete control, he then reached behind your hair with his other hand and stilled your head.
He made you choke around him by forcing half of his cock into your mouth with such power that you gagged uncontrollably. But you were determined to push yourself to the very limit. Under the mercy of the most powerful supe made you feel things. You had no idea that you needed such treatment in order to suck a cock properly. You became more and more wet as he applied more pressure, made you choke, and filled your mouth with his cock.
When you finally had enough of him, he withdrew so he could grab your mouth and start to fuck your face.
"You like that, don't you?" He moved your head to his cock because he enjoyed it. "You like being used like this? You like being controlled, huh? Yes, fuck. Take it!"
His cock, which was covered in your saliva, began to pulse in your mouth as he continued to fuck it. You clenched up, knowing what was about to happen. Your fingers gripped his legs more tightly as you tried to keep up with his power.
He asked, “You want it in your mouth?” However, it was obvious that it wasn't a question. Both of you and him were lost in pleasure.
Soldier Boy pulled back his cock and rubbed it on your reddening lips and waited for your response.
“Yes, please,” you moaned. “I need you finish in my mouth.”
He groaned, “Anything for my co-star,” and pushed his shaft back into your mouth as hard as he could. It was hot inside your throat.
You shivered in delight and disbelief as he started to flow in your throat, releasing his hot sperm. You moved a bit to relax, but he gave a loud grunt and stilled your head.
He moaned, “Fucking swallow,” as he continued to thrust his cock farther. You were so out of breath that tears were streaming down your face. He was cursing as he filled your mouth with his thick cum.
When he makes you taste him, you close your eyes and let him release his hot semen into your mouth fully. Though you weren't sure whether you liked the taste at all due to how strong and salty it was, you really enjoyed the whole process. You felt slick there; the way he was controlling your body was beyond perfect.
He withdrew his cock back once he had finished fucking your mouth.
Grasping your chin firmly, he said, “Let me see it.”
Your mouth opened. Excited, you could feel your legs quivering and hoping he wasn't done with you just yet. Even though you weren't sure whether you had enough time to go all the way, you needed to be touched so desperately.
He said, “Good girl,” seeing that you swallowed all. “Get up now.”
Without allowing you to react, he made you stand once more. It was absurd how he was still hard destipe spilling inside your mouth seconds ago. You wondered how frequently he would need to come in order to soften. It may have been because he was a supe. The cause didn't matter to you. Thank goodness he had the energy to continue. After all, you had your own needs.
“I hope we are not finished yet,” you stated, indicating your intentions with another stroke of his now firm cock.
“You want to be fucked badly, don't you?” Your long skirt was pulled up by the tough hands of Soldier Boy, who gave you a sly smile. “You enjoy getting fucked by engaged men?”
When his erect cock brushed your thighs and you felt out of breath, you taunted him, “Only the supes.”
He chuckled and had a brief look at your underwear. You were relieved he hadn't ripped them off. He removed your tits from your white bra and pushed your unbuttoned shirt down. You arched back properly when he gave your nipples a little play.
“Let's check to see whether you're wet enough to handle it all now. Tell me you're not a virgin.” He gave a warning but added, “I'm going to fuck you raw anyway.”
“I'm not,” you moaned, impatient for him to get inside. This time, you were unable to stop pleading. “Could you please fuck me already?”
The way you begged him made Soldier Boy smirk. “Since you're begging so nicely...”
He grabbed your hair into his palm, then gave his cock five or six firm strokes to make himself completely erect. He then bent your body into the trailer's wall and positioned himself behind your entrance.
When you actually noticed how much bigger he was than your hole, you gasped. Not that you didn't get fucked, but it had really been a while.
“Relax a little for fucks sake. Take it properly, or it's going to hurt. I won't give a fuck,” he warned, pressing himself farther inside of you.
You tensed up. He was pulling your hair a little and knowing that if he utilized his strength a little more, he could break your neck. That should have alarmed you, but instead it enhanced your excitement. Being at a supe's mercy as he fucked you was more exciting than any other sex you had ever had because you never knew if he might lose control while trying to get his pleasure.
He made you scream with pleasure and pain as he pushed his entire cock inside of you, pushing back with one strong motion. You began to moan and tried to fix your balance, but he instantly stilled your body by pulling your hair.
He moaned in rage, “Don't fucking move,” and proceeded to fuck you senselessly. Your eyes watered with every move he made, and your insides ached a bit. Both the pleasure and the pain that you experienced were immense.
“That's how you should get fucked. Like a slut you are. You are a slut, aren't you? You wanted me to fuck you there?” He groaned while continuing to penetrate you from the back. Your hair was tugged again by his hand. He needed a response.
“Yeah,” you moaned, placing a hand against his severe grip on your hip. “I needed you to fuck me right there.”
He was obviously pleased with your response since you could almost hear him smirking.
“Oh, yeah. Are you not embarrassed to want to have sex with an engaged man? Allow him to use your body any way he chooses. Show him that you are better than his future wife. You like the idea of a supe cheating on his girlfriend with you?” His filthy words caused your walls to contract as he gave you a strong and quick fuck. You were embarrassingly wet.
You teased him, “So what?” in between moans. “In the film we're in, we're husband and wife, right? We need to get into the role properly.”
“Do you think you can wear my sperm right there and yet perform your role properly? What would they say if they knew? Will you tell them you wanted me to fuck you so that you could do your role more effectively? Do you want everyone to know your cunt is full of my cum? Is that it?”
You knew that the game you were playing was making him more thrilled, so when he bent your body harder, you let out an excited gasp. He widened your legs and placed both of his hands on each side of your hips. Without his support, you would have already fallen.
You screamed out, “Yes, please, please,” as your walls continued to clench around his thick cock. “Husband.”
“Oh fuck,” he groaned as he got closer. He firmly gripped your bouncing tits and gave them a firm squeeze. “I'm going to fill you so good. Going to satisfy my wife's small greedy cunt nicely. Do you really want that, baby? Where do you want me to cum?”
Moaning, “Yeah, oh fuck, fuck. Please come inside, husband.” Your orgasm hit so hard you had to scream his name this time. You were sure some of the staff heard your screaming. Your walls clenched badly. You got his dick wet with your slick as your legs were trembling frantically. You felt like you were about to pass out from the intense fucking you were getting from him during your peak.
He moaned, “Whatever my wife wishes,” as he continued to penetrate you despite your oversensitivity. He then began to come inside of you with a loud grunt. Before he came, he held your hips so forcefully that you felt he was going to break your body till he was satisfied.
He cautiously removed his cock after giving you a bit more pleasure and making sure he had emptied his balls within your pussy. He gave you a hard spank on the ass and complimented you on your well-done move, seeing how his sperm was flowing between your legs.
You grinned to yourself and pulled up your underwear when you knew you were fucked well for real. You could let him fuck you again since his hot sperm in you felt so nice.
As he was complimenting you, you could hear him stuffing his dick back into his pants. “Now that was a good fuck.”
You looked at him and fixed your shirt, skirt, and hair. “I'm glad you enjoyed,” you said, biting your lips. You could still taste him.
“I'm sure I'm not the only one who enjoyed it,” he said, immediately lighting a cigarette and giving you a sly smirk.
You were told to expect on the set in five minutes when someone knocked on the door right then. You smiled to yourself, undisturbed by the stares from the staff, and spent the remainder of the day with Soldier Boy. You both believed that the method of acting had had the intended impact on you and him. The director was pleased with the two of you. After the break, Soldier Boy was acting better, at least. If only they knew the reason.
It's true that method acting helped you get into your roles better. Particularly behind the scenes.
⋆⋅☆⋆☆⋅⋆───⛥───⋆⋅☆⋅⋆───⛥───⋆⋅☆⋅⋆
Comments and reblogs are very appreciated. Let me know what you think please. For more, here's my MASTERLIST. ♥︎
#soldier boy x reader#soldier boy#jensen ackles#the boys series#the boys soldier boy#the boys#jensen ackles soldier boy#the boys tv#the boys season 3#soldier boy the boys#soldier boy fanfiction#soldier boy smut#the boys smut#jensen ackles the boys#jensen ackles fanfiction#jensen x reader#jensen ackles fic#jensen ackles x reader#the boys x you#the boys x y/n#the boys x reader#soldier boy fic#soldier boy imagines#soldier boy x female reader#soldier boy x y/n#soldier boy x you#soldier boy edit#smut#tumblr fanfic#fanfiction
657 notes
·
View notes
Text
Language Barrier
Fem!reader x Twice (mainly Sana)
Genre: Extremely fluffy and comedic
Warnings: none
Synopsis: You speak Korean perfectly, but Twice doesn't know that.



"Again? You need better staff," you say into the phone, exasperated. Your friend works in sound design for various concerts and often calls you when yet another member of the culinary or courtesy staff flakes out or quits without warning. It’s not a particularly difficult job, and the pay is decent. Plus, waiting on celebrities can be amusing—you get to see sides of them most people don’t.
"Well, you live so close, and we both know you’re not exactly swimming in plans, loser," she shoots back playfully.
"Fine, fine. Time, place, and dress code?" you reply, already rifling through your closet for the outfit she convinced you to buy "just in case."
"Same concert hall as last time. Be there at 10 AM for setup. White shirt, black pants. Bring them to change into, so you don’t ruin your good ones. Hair and makeup are your choice, but trust me—you’ll want to look good." There’s a sly undertone in her voice that sets off alarm bells. She’s hiding something.
"As if I ever try to look bad in front of celebrities," you grumble, glancing at your bedside clock. It’s 8:30—barely enough time to get ready, grab a quick lunch, and make it downtown. "Well, at least this time I have an hour. That’s better than last time’s 'get here now' panic."
"I’m learning," she says with faux innocence. Then, softer, "Thanks for doing this. See you soon."
You hang up and spring into action. First, leggings and a basic T-shirt for the commute. You pack your good clothes—crisp white shirt, black pants, and the shoes she always insists are "fancy enough." Hair comes next: rollers for quick curls while you keep your makeup simple. Neutral eyeshadow, a touch of blush, a dab of highlight—just enough to feel put together without going full glam. You're not the one under the spotlight, after all.
Time slips away faster than you expect. By the time your hair is pinned loosely at the crown of your head—not a bun, too stiff—you’ve got only ten minutes left. No time for anything fancy, so you toss hot dogs and mac and cheese in the microwave. The true lunch of champions. It’s not exactly a Michelin-star meal, but you figure you’ll sneak some of the event catering later.
You scarf down what you can grab your phone, keys, and bag, and head out the door.
You saw the signs as you were pulling into the back parking lot of the space. Your friend had conveniently forgotten to tell you just who you'd be waiting on, or even exactly what you'd be doing. She couldn't exactly hide the giant LED billboard with nine beautiful women you definitely more than recognized on it advertising tonight's concert. Even if she could, once inside the backdoor of the venue there was a staggering amount of Korean people and Hangul posted on doors and in hallways that'd give you a clue. You sent her a quick text saying where you were so she could give you today's assignment, and so you could jump down her throat for not telling you you'd be waiting on Twice. Just your favorite girl group ever.
She found you backstage by one of the many different locked rooms. "Hey best frieeend," she drew out in a singsongy way going in for a hug.
You weaved out of her hold, " Oh no. You've lost hug privileges. When exactly were you going to tell me it was Twice?"
"I said you'd want to look nice," she giggled. All part of her master plan.
"You are the worst," you muttered, trying to sound angry despite the giddy energy coursing through you. "What am I even doing? Don’t tell me I’m stuck running drinks or something."
"Relax," she said, waving a hand dismissively. "I may have mentioned you know Korean, so you’ll mostly be on standby in case they need anything. Food, water, minor stuff like that. You’re not serving tables or anything formal. Just be polite, stay professional, and don’t freak out."
"Freak out? Me?" you said with a nervous laugh. "Never. Definitely not having a full-blown internal meltdown right now."
"Good," she smirked, handing you a badge and a quick rundown of the evening. "You’ll do great. Oh, and try not to stare. They’re even prettier in person." With that, she spun on her heel and disappeared down the hallway, leaving you alone to process the fact that you were about to be in the same room as TWICE.
Taking a deep breath, you clipped the badge onto your shirt and adjusted your outfit one last time. Time to get it together. No fangirling. Just act cool, calm, and totally collected. Easy, right?
You refused to just sit and wait twiddling your thumbs until they arrived. You exchanged some pleasantries with the catering people and helped them set up snack trays and water bottles in the green room for Twice. They would be here soon for a sound check. Actual sound check, not the fake two to three-song warm-up open to the VIP fans. After that, they had some time to eat and in general hang around while getting their hair, makeup, and costumes done.
The green room looked cozy but professional, with plush chairs, a makeup station, and a neatly arranged buffet table laden with fruit, finger sandwiches, and those perfectly packaged snacks you always imagined celebrities lived on. The catering staff smiled appreciatively as you adjusted the placement of a tray.
You went to go change into your nicer clothes and tiny black kitten heels. You had just enough time to stash your bag somewhere out of sight before everyone started moving franticly.
The door to the green room creaked open, and in walked TWICE.
Nayeon led the group, her smile lighting up the room as she exchanged a few words with a staff member. Behind her, the rest of the group filed in, chatting amongst themselves in soft Korean. You froze for a moment, clutching a water bottle in your hand, trying to look casual as your heart raced.
“Wow, they really went all out for this,” Dahyun said in Korean, gesturing toward the snack table. “I don’t think we’ve ever had this much fruit before.”
Chaeyoung smirked. “Dahyun, you’d say that even if it was just an apple and a banana.”
Tzuyu leaned toward Mina, her voice soft and melodic looking at the monitor in the corner. “The stage lighting looks amazing, doesn’t it? It feels so warm.”
Mina nodded, her tone thoughtful. “It’s perfect. I think the fans will love it.”
They began to spread out, scanning the room and chatting in their small groups. You tried to stay focused, pretending to adjust the water bottles while listening intently.
“Excuse me,” a gentle voice interrupted your thoughts. You looked up to see Sana standing a few feet away, a curious smile on her face. “Uh… water?” she asked in English, her accent charmingly thick as she gestured toward the bottles.
You quickly picked one up and handed it to her, forcing a polite smile. “Yes, here you go,” you said, your voice steady despite the butterflies in your stomach.
“Thank you,” she said brightly, taking the bottle. “Nice...” She motioned toward the snack table and gave you a small thumbs-up before returning to the group.
Meanwhile, Jeongyeon had wandered toward a catering staff member, her English more deliberate but clear. “This… for us?” she asked, pointing at the trays.
“Yes,” the staff member replied. “It’s all for you. Please help yourselves.”
Jeongyeon nodded, looking impressed. “Very nice. Thank you.”
Nayeon, ever the social butterfly, spotted you lingering by the table. “Hello!” she greeted cheerfully in English, making you jump slightly. “You… work here?”
You nodded quickly. “Yes. I’m just helping with the setup today.”
“Ah, good job!” she said with a grin, her Korean accent giving the words a playful lilt. “This… all looks very good.”
“Thank you,” you managed, heat rushing to your cheeks.
As they settled in, their conversations switched fluidly between Korean and broken English, depending on who they were speaking to. Jihyo exchanged a few words with the event coordinator about the schedule, effortlessly mixing both languages.
“Soundcheck… now?” she asked, her English with large pauses but clear.
“Soon,” the coordinator replied. “You have a little time to eat first.”
“Good,” Jihyo said, nodding firmly before turning back to the group to relay the information in Korean.
The room buzzed with warmth and activity, their laughter mixing with the casual chatter of staff members. You couldn’t help but feel awestruck by how approachable they were, even as global superstars. Every interaction, whether in Korean or English, only made them feel more human—and somehow, even more dazzling.
As the group began to relax, you continued tidying up the snack table, doing your best to stay invisible. But you couldn’t help overhearing their conversations—especially the ones you weren’t supposed to understand.
“Did you see her?” Sana murmured to Nayeon in Korean, her voice low but full of curiosity.
“Who?” Nayeon replied, leaning slightly toward her.
“That staff member by the table,” Sana said, nodding subtly in your direction. “They’re really pretty, don’t you think?”
Nayeon glanced at you for a brief moment, her eyes sparkling with amusement before she turned back to Sana. “Oh, I noticed,” she said with a sly smile. “They’re very elegant. It’s rare to see someone like that working backstage.”
Dahyun, catching wind of the conversation, leaned in with a mischievous grin. “What are you two whispering about?”
Nayeon waved her off playfully. “Nothing. Just admiring the staff here. Very organized, very… visually pleasing.”
Chaeyoung raised an eyebrow, overhearing as well. “Wait, are you all talking about them?” she asked, her tone teasing as she subtly gestured toward you. “Yeah, they’re cute. I noticed earlier.”
You kept your head down, pretending to focus on rearranging the water bottles, but your cheeks were burning. Hearing them talk about you like that, assuming you didn’t understand a word, made your heart race.
Mina joined the conversation with a small, approving nod. “I agree. There’s something… calm about them. It’s nice.”
Jihyo laughed softly. “You all sound like you’re picking a favorite contestant on a reality show. Be professional.” But even she glanced your way with a subtle smile, clearly not immune to the group’s observations.
Tzuyu, ever the quiet observer, finally chimed in. “They do seem kind,” she said simply, her voice soft but sincere.
Sana giggled, leaning closer to Dahyun. “Should we talk to them more? Maybe invite them to hang out later?”
“Stop it,” Nayeon said, feigning exasperation. “They’re working! Don’t make it awkward.”
You busied yourself even more, carefully pretending you had no idea what was being said, but every word made your chest tighten with a mix of embarrassment and giddy disbelief. They thought you were pretty. TWICE thought you were pretty.
“Do you think they know Korean?” Chaeyoung asked suddenly, tilting her head.
“Doubt it,” Dahyun replied. “They haven’t reacted to anything we’ve said.”
You bit the inside of your cheek to keep from smiling. It took everything in you to keep your expression neutral, even as their words replayed in your head.
"Should we test it?" Chaeyoung asked. "Say something outrageous and see if she reacts?"
Jihyo came over and playfully slapped Chaeyoungs arm. "Don't be mean. She's probably just nervous. Leave her be."
She couldn't let it go. Chaeyoung wandered over to you. Your hands meticulously move bottles fractions of inches repeatedly. "You...very busy hun?" She managed in broken English.
You glanced at her, smiled politely, and nodded speaking slower than normal so she could catch more of it. "Yes, keeping things organized for you."
“Good,” she replied, her tone teasing as she switched back to Korean. “So professional. I think we’re making her nervous.”
“You’re making ME nervous,” Nayeon quipped, rolling her eyes. “Stop messing around. You’re going to scare her away.”
Sana, however, seemed utterly unfazed. “But seriously,” she said, her tone lowering as she addressed the group in Korean, “look at her hair and outfit. So well put together. Not to mention her face. It’s impressive.”
Dahyun smirked. “You’re really taken with her, huh?”
“Who wouldn’t be?” Sana shot back. “It’s not every day you meet someone who looks like they walked out of a drama while setting up a snack table.”
This time, you couldn’t help the faint smile that tugged at your lips. You turned your back to them, pretending to check on the fruit tray, hoping they didn’t catch the slight quirk of your expression.
“Did she just smile?” Momo whispered, narrowing her eyes slightly. “I think she might understand us.”
“No way,” Dahyun said, shaking her head. “She’s been quiet this whole time. Probably just coincidence.”
Still, the idea seemed to spark a new level of intrigue among the group. Jeongyeon, who had been sitting quietly, glanced at you and said in English, “You… like music?”
Caught off guard, you hesitated for a moment before nodding. “Me? Yes, I do. Your music is quite good.”
“Thanks,” she said simply, her smile warm but brief. Then she turned back to the group and said in Korean, “See? She’s nice and a fan. Let’s not overwhelm her.”
Tzuyu, who had been observing everything silently, finally spoke up. “Maybe we should invite her to the show later. Watch in the wings,” she said in Korean.
“Really?” Jihyo asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Why not?” Tzuyu shrugged. “It’d be a nice gesture.”
You pretended not to hear, focusing on folding some napkins, but your heart felt like it was doing cartwheels. If they followed through with that idea, how were you supposed to stay composed?
Sana waved you over pulled up her translator app and typed out, 'Would you like to watch the show from backstage?' but when the electronic voice read it out in English it came out as 'Do you want to see the show behind the scenes?'
You understood it regardless. You stared at her phone then back at her then back down again and just nodded thanking her. "Really? Yes, yes, please. Thank you."
Momo smirked. "Ok, that was adorable."
Sana grabbed your hands and smiled wide genuinely happy that you seemed so interested. When she let go you scurried back to behind the table blushing like a mad woman with your fingers twirling around each other.
"I stand corrected. That's the cutest thing I've ever seen," Momo said. "Look Sana, you made her all flustered."
You refused to look up now having a convenient reason to be blushy and shy. As you busied yourself with unnecessary adjustments to the napkin display, you could feel the weight of their gazes. The warmth in your cheeks was practically radiating at this point, and no amount of deep breathing seemed to help.
“I think we broke her,” Chaeyoung teased in Korean, earning a chuckle from the group.
“Stop teasing,” Jihyo said, though her tone was more amused than scolding. “She agreed, didn’t she? That’s enough for now.”
Sana beamed, her excitement palpable. “I’ll make sure she gets a good spot,” she declared in Korean, clearly thrilled at the prospect of including you in their world, even if only for a little while.
From your side of the room, you peeked up just in time to see Sana still grinning in your direction. It wasn’t the kind of smile you’d expect from a superstar—it was warm, sincere, and oddly grounding. You managed a small wave, which only seemed to delight her further.
As the group settled into their pre-show routine, the flurry of activity grew. Makeup artists and hairstylists began their work, and the atmosphere shifted into one of focused preparation. You tried to keep out of the way, but the occasional glance or kind word from the members reminded you just how surreal this moment was.
Eventually, Nayeon wandered over, her casual confidence as radiant as ever. “You okay?” she asked in English, tilting her head slightly.
“Yes,” you replied quickly, your voice a touch higher than you intended. “Thank you for asking.”
She smiled, her eyes crinkling with genuine amusement. “Good. Don’t let Sana scare you. She… very friendly.”
You chuckled softly, nodding. “I noticed.”
As the minutes ticked by, the group prepared to head to the stage for their private sound check. Just before they left, Sana turned back to you with a quick wave and an encouraging smile. “See you later!” she said in English, her words simple but filled with warmth.
You nodded, managing a quiet, “See you,” in return. As they filed out of the room, you finally allowed yourself to exhale fully. You leaned against the edge of the snack table, your heart still pounding.
As the green room emptied, the flurry of energy faded, leaving you in a blissful yet surreal calm. Twice had just been standing there, talking to you—not at you, not above you, but like you were part of the team. It felt too good to be true, but the slight ache in your cheeks from smiling confirmed that it was very real.
Still, the thought of being invited backstage for the actual concert was almost too much to process. You replayed Sana’s gesture in your mind—the way she grabbed your hands, her bright smile, the genuine excitement in her voice. It was the kind of thing you’d only dreamed about.
After the soundcheck, your friend finally reappeared, looking as smug as ever. “So? How’s my favorite ‘just helping out for the day’ staff member?” she teased, a knowing glint in her eyes.
“You set me up,” you accused, though there wasn’t much heat behind it.
“I did you a favor,” she shot back, crossing her arms. “Come on, you’re freaking out, aren’t you? You met Twice. They love you.”
You hesitated, debating whether to admit how much you’d overheard. “They were… really nice,” you said carefully. “And, uh, they invited me to watch the show from backstage.”
Her eyes widened, and then she burst out laughing. “Oh my god, you’ve been here, like, two hours, and you’re already besties with Twice? That’s iconic.”
“Stop,” you groaned, but her laughter was infectious. “I don’t know how I’m going to keep it together. I mean, Sana literally held my hands, and Nayeon asked if I was okay, and—” You cut yourself off, realizing you were rambling. “I’m doomed.”
“You’re not doomed,” she said, grinning. “You’re lucky. Do you know how many people would kill to be in your position right now?”
You sighed, shaking your head. “I know, I know. It’s just… overwhelming.”
“Well, get used to it,” she said, clapping you on the back. “Because you’re about to have the best night of your life.”
The hours passed in a blur. You helped with final preparations, making sure everything in the green room stayed tidy and well-stocked. The buzz of the venue grew louder as fans began arriving, their excitement palpable even from backstage. The Twice members returned briefly to grab drinks and snacks, their energy shifting into show mode.
Each of them had a way of preparing—Jeongyeon hummed quietly to herself, Jihyo went over notes with a staff member, and Sana, as bubbly as ever, flitted around the room, checking on everyone, including you. Every interaction, no matter how small, leaves you feeling more grounded in the moment as if this surreal experience was meant to happen.
Finally, it was time for the concert. True to her word, Sana guided you to a spot near the wings where you could see the stage without getting in anyone’s way.
“You okay?” she asked again, her tone light but genuinely concerned.
“Yes,” you replied, giving her a small smile. “Thank you.”
Her face lit up, and she gave you a quick thumbs-up before joining the others. Moments later, the lights dimmed, and the roar of the crowd filled the air. You watched in awe as the members took the stage, their presence electrifying. It was one thing to see them perform on a screen, but witnessing their energy, precision, and charisma up close was something else entirely.
From your spot, you could see not only the performance but also the little interactions between the members—the quick glances, the shared smiles, the subtle nods of encouragement. It was a side of them the audience rarely got to see, and it made the experience all the more special.
As the show went on, you found yourself completely immersed, cheering quietly from the sidelines and feeling a sense of pride for a group you’d admired for so long. When Sana caught your eye mid-performance and winked, you nearly melted on the spot.
By the time the concert ended, you were on cloud nine. As the members came backstage, still buzzing with adrenaline, Sana made a beeline for you.
“So? How was it?” she asked, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
“Incredible,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “Thank you for letting me watch.”
She grinned, leaning in slightly. “You’re welcome. It was fun.”
Before you could respond, the rest of the group began filing in, offering you nods, smiles, and even a few casual “thank yous” in passing. Nayeon gave you a quick pat on the shoulder as she walked by, and Jihyo offered a warm, “Good job today.”
As the chaos settled and the members started winding down, your friend appeared again, looking thoroughly pleased with herself.
“See?” she said, nudging you. “I told you this would be the best night of your life.”
The post-concert buzz was palpable, with staff bustling around to pack things up while the members of Twice cooled down, chatting amongst themselves. You stayed in your corner, observing quietly, savoring the memories of the night.
You were carefully arranging water bottles on a nearby table when chaos erupted. A loud crash sounded from the other side of the room, followed by the unmistakable sound of hurried footsteps. One of the backstage doors had been flung open, and a man—clearly not a staff member—was charging toward the group of idols.
Everything happened so fast, but instinct kicked in. You spotted him barreling toward Sana, whose back was turned. Without thinking, you shouted in Korean, "Be careful! Behind you!"
Sana turned just in time to see the man, her eyes wide with alarm. Fortunately, security was already on him, tackling him to the ground before he could get any closer. The room erupted in frantic murmurs, staff rushing in to ensure everyone was okay.
Breathing heavily, you looked around to see Twice staring—more specifically, at you. Jihyo was the first to speak, her eyes narrowing slightly in confusion. "Wait… you can speak Korean?"
You froze, realizing what had just happened. There was no hiding it now. With a sheepish smile, you nodded. "Yes… a little."
Nayeon let out a loud laugh, slapping her thigh. "A little? You just spoke perfectly!"
Dahyun looked equal parts impressed and amused. "So, you understood everything we said earlier?"
Your cheeks flushed, and you ducked your head slightly. "Yes, I heard it," you admitted, bracing for their reactions.
Momo clapped her hands together, looking delighted. "Why didn’t you say anything? Do you know how awkward we were being?"
Sana stepped closer, her expression a mix of embarrassment and curiosity. "Then… did you hear when I said you were pretty earlier?"
You nodded, your face growing hotter by the second. “Yes, I heard that too.”
The group exploded into laughter, their teasing and playful remarks blending together. Jihyo shook her head, a fond smile on her face. "You’re amazing. You stayed so quiet this whole time."
Chaeyoung grinned mischievously. "So you did understand when I said something weird, huh?"
Trying to lighten the mood, you shrugged. "I was just trying to focus on my work."
Tzuyu smiled softly, her voice calm amidst the laughter. "And you protected us. Thank you."
Her sincere words seemed to settle the room, and Sana reached out to gently squeeze your arm. "Really, thank you. Because of you, nothing bad happened."
Though the teasing didn’t stop entirely, it took on a more affectionate tone. They were clearly impressed—and grateful. As the night wound down, you couldn’t help but feel like the bond you’d formed with the group had deepened unexpectedly and unforgettably.
The room gradually settled as the adrenaline from the incident ebbed away, leaving only the warm hum of conversation and soft laughter. You busied yourself by tidying up the snack table, partly to distract yourself from the knowing glances and teasing smiles still coming your way. Your face was burning, and you couldn’t meet their eyes for too long without feeling like you might combust.
Sana was the first to approach you again, her usual playful smile tinted with genuine shyness this time. She tilted her head slightly, clasping her hands behind her back as she hesitated before speaking. "Um," she started in Korean before switching to English. “You… very brave. Thank you.”
You waved your hands in front of you, flustered. "It—it was nothing, really. I’m just glad everyone’s okay."
Sana giggled softly. "No, you were really cool." She glanced back at the group, who were all watching the interaction with varying degrees of amusement and encouragement. “Uh… do you… have phone?” she asked hesitantly, her accent adorably thick.
You blinked, caught off guard. “My phone?”
Nayeon, who couldn’t resist jumping into the moment, called out in Korean. "You might as well ask for her number!"
Sana whirled around, her cheeks pink. “Unnie!” she scolded before turning back to you, her bashfulness now painfully evident. “I mean… number? For… talking later?” She fiddled with the hem of her shirt, her confidence faltering.
Your heart was pounding as you fumbled for words. “Oh, um, yeah, sure. I can—yeah.” You pulled out your phone, your hands trembling slightly as you unlocked it and handed it to her. Hopefully, fast enough she didn't realize your wallpaper was her.
Sana quickly typed her number in, then smiled shyly as she handed it back to you. “Text me… sometime?”
Before you could respond, Dahyun chimed in with a sly grin. "Should we invite her to our group chat?"
Momo snickered. "Don’t overwhelm her."
“Maybe,” Sana said, glancing at you with a playful smile before joining the group again, leaving you standing there with her number saved in your phone and a heart racing faster than it probably ever had.
As the evening wound down and the group prepared to leave, several of them waved and offered warm goodbyes. Sana lingered just a moment longer, catching your eye as she gave you a small, almost nervous wave. "Good night," she said softly before disappearing with the others.
You stared at your phone again, the contact glowing on the screen like a dream made real. This was a night you’d never forget—and perhaps, the beginning of something even more extraordinary.
#twice#twice imagines#sana imagines#sana twice#twice nayeon#twice jeongyeon#twice momo#twice jihyo#twice mina#twice dahyun#twice chaeyoung#twice tzuyu#nayeon#jeongyeon#sana#jihyo#mina#dahyun#chaeyoung#tzuyu#twice x reader#sana x reader
369 notes
·
View notes
Text
Reverie - Part 1
Autistic Reader x Barça Femení - Part 2




Hey, I have some things to say before you start reading. ASD is a very vast spectrum, no two people with it experience the same stuff on a day-to-day basis. This story is written with my knowledge from people I know, and also from my own experiences living with autism too. So don't take this as 'the' perspective, this is a drop in the ocean and this most definitely isn't a handbook on autism. If anyone has any questions or thoughts about this, or ASD in general, you are more than welcome to message me or drop something in my inbox! This is just part one, if you like this first half of the story (because I have no idea how this will go down), let me know if you wanna see the second part, it's ready to go whenever.
Big big thanks to @copper-16 for editing it and leaving such lovely comments on it, I wouldn't have the confidence to post this if it wasn't for your words. Thank you for taking a chance on this story and opening yourself up to learn more, the world needs more people like you and we're all much better off that you're here🫶🏼🫶🏼
This is my favourite thing I've ever written, and I kinda feel like I'm giving away a piece of my heart by posting this (dramatic much), let me know what you think, hope you like it :)
“Are you ready to go in?”
Are you?
Are you ready to walk into a new setting, head held high, and show your teammates you are worth it?
Or are you going to back out? Reverse right out the parking space, speed off to the airport, and catch a flight to god knows where?
That's simply not a possibility. Even if the thought of walking through those reception doors that stare tauntingly at you from across the car park perturbs you more than anything else, there's no backing out now.
Barcelona, the pride of Catalunya, the dominants of Europe, doesn't accept quitters. And that fact glares at you, along with all of its history and values held in the iconic badge that countless legends had adorned, and with it came a legacy you weren’t sure you had the strength to bare on your back. The new number nine, born and raised in Norway but made into the player you are now in Germany.
Here you were, after five years playing for Frankfurt, where you had grown accustomed to a comfortable routine with familiar faces and the same surroundings for so long, now in a new country that held so many unknowns. For someone with so many disadvantages ever present in their life, living in three different countries is a pretty impressive achievement.
Please, let it all be worth it.
After a few frustrating years in the Frauen-Bundesliga, you had signed for the best team in Europe and, arguably, the rest of the world too. Frankfurt had been a beautiful experience, one that had changed your life, but as a result of many, many long discussions with family and friends and psychologists, you had come to the terrifying realisation that it was time for a new challenge.
Why was that absolutely petrifying? Because you and life changes did not get along. Even after 26 years of living, it just wasn’t meant to be. But, such is life, and chances had to be taken.
You'd always be thankful for Frankfurt. Moving to play there was the first time you took such a huge leap of faith, and it had worked out well, eventually. In your eyes, the first season there was a disaster, but your mother would say it was the proudest year of her life. It had been difficult for her to see at times just how much you struggled at points, sure, but you made it to the light at the end of the tunnel and, by the end of it, you were a completely different person in the most incredible way possible. From then on, you continued to grow.
Yet, that was the thing with the German side. When you joined, they were a club with a legacy most teams would envy, but they never amounted to anything more during your time there. You fell in love with the staff, your teammates, and just about everything else during your time there. The only problem, which was pretty damn big in the grand scheme of things, was that you fell out of love with the football you were playing.
You were able to grow and survive at Frankfurt. You wanted to flourish and thrive at Barcelona.
Except, in comparison to the average human, there were a lot more obstacles ahead that could prevent you from accomplishing that aspiration. Over your life, you had overcome many bumps in the road, some leaving a harsh imprint on your self-worth and others hardly affecting you. For example, talking to the girl you were roomed with at 16 at the Norway Football Team camp had turned out to be one of the best things you could have done. Yet, in the same breath, playing for the national team had left you in a broken state, and as a result, you haven't played for them in a few years.
The back and forth travel was too much, and opting out of playing for Norway, as much as it broke your heart that you weren’t strong enough to represent your country on the international stage, it allowed you to rest and recuperate so that you were at the top of your game for your club. Did you dream of wearing your country’s crest one day? Yes, all footballers did. But you weren’t in a place to do that, and you’re not sure you ever will be again.
Signing for Barcelona could be life-changing, but it could also be world-shattering in the worst way imaginable. This was a pretty sizable leap of faith, and the only way that faith could form into something incredible is if you made that happen. You, no one else. That thought filled you with both determination and crushing anxiety. This just could not be another failed attempt. There was no way you could come back.
Ultimately, it would have been downright psychopathic to turn down such an amazing offer from Barcelona. Two years playing for a club that's won three of the last four Champion's League finals? A team that had just completed the quadruple for the first time in their history? Yeah, nonsensical.
However, like always, there were a number of doubts that spiralled from those incredible stats. Did they need you? If they had a mostly flawless season, did they really need a 26 year old woman whose mind hardly functioned like every other person? Did they really need someone who couldn't even play for the national team anymore because they were too overwhelmed with their life? Did they need someone who needed their hand held through every life event, big or small? Did they-
“Hey, you ready?”
That voice had some kind of magic to it. It was like clock-work, this always happened when she was around; that voice in your head consuming you with unwanted thoughts was erased as soon as you tore your eyes away from the doors and looked at the woman beside you.
Ingrid. The one person that had single-handedly convinced you to come here. To Barcelona, playing in a hot country, with people you don’t know, speaking a language you can’t understand- oh my God, what have you done?!
“I… god, I don’t know.” You breathed out in a whisper, hardly intelligible.
The world around you honed in on this one moment here, the peak of your career so far. Apart from Ingrid and the doors to the building and what was in store behind them, there was nothing else that could grasp your attention. There could be a blazing fire behind your car, a lion running full speed towards your car door, or a thief in the back seat for all you knew. Nothing else mattered. The two sides of your mind, the devil and angel on your shoulders were battling it out again, as they always were, whilst your hands fidgeted anxiously in your lap.
“You have to go in at some point, snuppa. You can’t stay in the car forever.” Ingrid softly reminded you, moving to take hold of your hand to comfort your stimming. “It will be a really good day, I promise. My years here so far have been the best of my life, everyone is so nice and welcoming. I never thought I could enjoy training as much as I do now. You will be fine, I have no doubts.”
“I’m not sure about that one.” You laughed nervously, eyes back on the building before you, now slightly glazed over and blurred.
“I am certain about everything I just said.” Ingrid stated definitively, squeezing your hand. “Plus, not everyone in there are complete strangers. You have me, Mapi, you know Caro and you’ve met Jonatan and some other staff members. You know Loren, the team psychologist who you can go see any time you want. We’ll get you past this part of today, and then you have the whole afternoon to do whatever you’d like.”
You nodded at her words, desperately trying to remind yourself of them over and over so that they stick, and you can get through those damn doors.
“You know how much easier my life would be if I knew how everything was going to play out?” You blurted out a moment later, Ingrid smiling in amusement. “It would be a breeze, Ingrid.”
“It would also make your life very boring, min skatt.”
“For you, it would be. For me, I'd live freely.”
Ingrid just laughed and shook her head, squeezing your hand once more before looking at the time on her watch.
“Come on. We have to do this one way or another, and I'm not letting you go in on your own. You want to make me late to training?” She teased, targeting your weak spot. Evil.
“That's cruel, Ingrid. So cruel.” You rolled your eyes but nevertheless stepped out of the car once you'd turned it off.
You didn't make it far though. Once you had gotten your kit bag from the boot of the car, you closed it and froze. Eyes unmoving from the daunting building in front of you.
“Would you like some company after training? We can stay at home, or go out for food, or do anything you'd like.” Ingrid offered, snapping you out of your anxious trance.
Even after… god, ten years now, you were still sometimes left dumb-founded by how well Ingrid knew you. A lot of the time, you yourself are in the dark about what you need, but your fellow Norwegian just gets it, even when you don't. It's pretty safe to say that your life, your whole career, would look a hell of a lot different if you had never met Ingrid.
If you put her characteristics into a different section when it comes to your favourite things about her, the thing you love most about the defender beside you is how she treats you. Sure, the majority of people treated you with respect and kindness, but the defender's love and care was on a whole other level. Like in this scenario now, when she knows you're too overwhelmed by the situation that confronts you to be able to think clearly. But here she is, giving you clear and thought-out options that off-kilt the tunnel vision you have on this one miniscule event, and now gives you something to look forward to.
It reminds you that the world won't end if this training session doesn't go how you want it to, that life goes on afterwards. It makes the road clearer, the journey easier, and allows solace to be found in a down-right terrifying moment.
The funny thing is, however, is that your new home is actually Ingrid's home. No, you weren't living with her, but you were indeed staying in her apartment. She basically lived at Mapi's apartment anyway, so the second she caught wind of your transfer, she immediately offered her disregarded apartment up to you. It was a huge item checked off the ‘things that need doing after uprooting your entire settled, content, perfectly routine life’ to-do list, but you couldn't quite relish in the relief yet.
That's because, though it went unsaid, another factor of Ingrid's offer of letting you stay was so that, if all went wrong and you couldn't make a life for yourself in Barcelona, there was no tenancy to rip up and ultimately it would be a lot less hassle than if you had rented an entirely new place. Ingrid's excuse of not changing your name on the tenancy for now was so that you could settle in with as little stress as possible, but you knew the underlying meaning. Basically, it was a giant get out of jail free card.
“I think I would like that a lot, actually. Thanks.” You said to the taller girl next to you, whose arm had come to wrap around your shoulders.
“Perfect! María has some things to do but I'm free all afternoon, so we can figure something out. For now though, we have to train.”
Taking in a deep breath, you nodded once more.
“That's all it is. Just training.” You told yourself, physically shaking the anxiety off of your chest and marching forwards. You got as far as those damn doors before you froze on the spot again. “Fuck, this is so scary.”
“I know it is.” Ingrid sympathised, rubbing a hand up and down your back. “We've got this though. It's just training, right?”
“It's just training. And a few introductions. And about a million new people.” You sighed. “Will you stick with me the whole time?”
“Like glue, søster.” Ingrid said firmly, placing a kiss on your forehead. “Let's go.”
And just like that, you did walk into the building with your head held high, disregarding the burdening nerves and replacing them with a deep-rooted determination to prove you are worth it. Maybe your teammates would think otherwise if they knew the secret you were keeping from them, but for now, you would put up a front and act just like them. Your best bet at succeeding here is to fit in, and that's what you'll do.
Ingrid wasn't impressed with this tactic of yours, not in the slightest. Jonatan and other senior staff members knew about you, Loren the psychologist knew about you, and Mapi knew. Besides that, everyone else was in the dark. There was only so long Ingrid could last before she had to tell someone at least, like Alexia or Irene or Marta, because she wanted the best for you and the best couldn't be given if your needs weren't catered for.
Like now, as she watched your whole face change in a split second as the mask came down so fast that, had she blinked a second later, she would have missed it entirely. The tension to the way you held your shoulders was all the evidence she needed that your whole nervous system was wracked with dread, and though she should expect it by now, it didn't stop the jab of sympathy she felt for you.
Of course she knew how difficult this would be for you, she just had really high hopes. Sometimes, even after all these years, it slipped her mind how much you still struggled with things. You'd gotten a lot better at dealing with various different circumstances and that mere fact could bring tears to her eyes if she thought about how far you had come, but moments like these were a snap back to the reality you still lived.
You lived so beautifully, you were so strong now, that your struggles were hardly visible anymore. Yet, when one knows a person for so long, they come to learn the signs. Ingrid knew you like the back of her hand. It still amazed her how quick you put the mask back up, normally being so care-free and light around her. But here, outside of the room everyone was due to meet in for the morning, a feigned smile on your face and a falsity to your posture signified all that Ingrid needed to know.
Even despite your dawdling in the car park, you and Ingrid were some of the first to arrive at the meeting, only a handful of unfamiliar faces scattered around the room. Jonatan looked up at the door upon your arrival and his face lit up, immediately dropping what he was doing to come and greet you with a beaming smile. He offers a gentle handshake, also being sure to speak in clear English so that your mind wasn’t overloaded more than it already was. All of it was reassuring, especially as he kept you off to the side as the room slowly began to fill up, before guiding you to the last chair on the front row beside Ingrid so that the meeting could start. Thankfully, to your relief, he gave you a short introduction to the rest of the squad, you only briefly turning and giving the room a general wave before allowing Jonatan to move onto more pressing matters.
From then on, you were rushed off your feet with introductions and training, all of which weren’t half as bad as you’d expected. During the short walk from the meeting to the changing room, a few others came along to properly greet you, all whilst Ingrid stayed close to your side. Mapi had also come bounding along after you the second you left the first room, Ingrid wincing at the excitement her girlfriend met you with but instantly that worry was erased as soon as you turned to Mapi with a matching overjoyed smile.
By the time you actually got onto the pitch, you had spoken to almost all of the team already. And like Ingrid said, they were just as amazing as you had hoped they would be. Every single one, in their own ways, welcomed you to the team and made small talk with you for a few moments before letting whoever next came by to have their own chance at greeting you. But, it wasn’t until you were about to join in with the warm-up that the person you’d been most nervous about meeting came along.
Your new captain, Alexia. The powerhouse of the Barcelona team, the one you had to leave the best impression on.
A few days prior, amidst a conversation in the corner of Ingrid’s favourite cafe, you had sheepishly demanded that she give you a run-down of each and every single member of the team. There had been Ona, who Ingrid described as a lightning fast defender whose jestful clapbacks were even quicker than her sprint bursts on the pitch. Then Cata, the new number one goalkeeper whose cheek was sometimes too much for even the younger members of the team. Jana, a surefire future talent who was often found beside her quieter, more reserved but equally talented counterpart, Bruna. Patri and Pina were much the same, as were Vicky and Salma. Ingrid gave you a short but detailed profile of all of them, leaving the most important for last. Alexia, who initially came across as slightly cold due to the stoic, focused expression she usually wore. But, to her teammates and those closest to her, she was a world class leader, an even better player, and most importantly, a defiantly caring person with a personality that had more sides than a kaleidoscope.
Upon hearing the exit door slamming shut, you turned your attention to the direction of the sound, only to be met with her. Casually strolling over, squinting in the face of the sun, she came over to you with a… a smile on her face?
“Hola! You must be the novota, nice to meet you.” She beamed, inviting you into a quick, polite hug before standing back. “Happy to be here?”
As always with new people, especially someone like the woman before you, you floundered internally for a moment, so many replies flitting around your mind with so little time to react.
“Y-yeah! Really happy to be here, thank you, Alexia.” You landed on, and judging by her reaction, it was the right thing to say.
“Good, I am glad to hear that. Sorry I was not here for the meeting, you’ve met everybody already, sí?”
“Yes, Jonatan introduced me in the briefing.”
“Good. Bueno, let’s get started. I am excited to be working with you.” The Spaniard smiled brightly once more, before gesturing loosely for the pair of you to join the rest of the group.
The rest of the day, as they say, is history.
It honestly went by in a blur, and if Ingrid was at all surprised by the way you literally fell into your bed when you arrived home, not surfacing from the newfound safe haven until about an hour later, she didn’t show it. This was Ingrid after all, and every quirk of yours, new or old, still brought a smile to her face. Ten years later and she couldn’t help but love you more each time she saw you.
—
The first week goes a lot smoother than you could have dreamed of to be honest - it’s only the start of preseason after all. But, there is still plenty of time for cracks to show. It only takes two days for all your progress to tear at the seams.
On the first day of your second week, you’re walking into training on your own for the first time since you joined. Shouldn’t be a big deal, right? Wrong! Big fucking deal actually, because now it’s like walking blind, heading straight for what feels like danger. Unguided, no one by your side, only joined by the weight of an elephant seated right on your heart.
With the help of Ingrid of course, who else, you had established somewhat of a routine that made the transition so much easier. But it wasn’t quite clear until now, just how much easier it had made showing up to training everyday. Because, without your Norwegian counterpart who would be absent from training, you were left to show up all alone, and suddenly everything became ten times harder.
Ingrid was more than just your friend, she was the one constant in this new life you lived that was always present. Anything you needed, one glance from you in her direction and she’d be with you in an instant. She, as stupid as it may seem, was the foundation of your routine, and now that she wasn’t here, all the hard work you’d made to settle in seemed to crumble under your feet.
Three weeks of living in Barcelona, one week of training successfully completed, just for you to end up back at square one. And that meant you were trapped in your own body, limbs acting entirely on autopilot as your legs carried you over to those stupid doors that once again stood intimidatingly in front of you. Just like last week, except this time there was no one to coax you out of your shell, no one to mindlessly guide you over to one of the tables in the canteen, no one to walk you out onto the training pitch. You were all alone.
An unfortunate tactic hadn’t left your habits after all these years: avoidance. What better way to deal with something, then to not deal with it all, right? Right?
Obviously, you couldn’t miss the whole day, you still had commitments and expectations you needed to live up to. If there was one thing that you couldn’t handle (apart from almost everything in this neurotypical world) it was letting people down, disappointing them.
So, if you opted out of breakfast for the day and beelined straight for the changing rooms instead, what business was it to anyone else? You were here, that’s all they could ask for. The plan was to get dressed into your training kit as fast as physically possible, before heading out onto the pitch for some time alone before everyone else came along.
…Except, just as you were lacing up your boots, hand trembling at an embarrassing intensity as you did so, the door opened prematurely. And, really, out of everyone, did it have to be her?
“Oh. I did not expect anyone to be in here. Bon dia.” Alexia smiled at you, heading to her cubby just a few seats away from yours.
“Bon dia.” You muttered sheepishly, keeping your head down and tying your laces at a wildly uncontrolled speed. If Alexia noticed, she didn’t mention it. Thank god.
“I was just going to get some extra practice in, if you wanted to join me.” She offered, swapping her trainers for her boots since she was already in her training gear.
Great minds think alike..?
“Yeah, I was going to do the same thing. Thanks.”
“Ay, it's nothing. It's great that you're so hard working, you’re already fitting right in.” Sorry, could you say that again, or write it down even? “Ready?”
“What? Oh- sorry, yes, I’m ready.” You gave her a tight-lipped smile before slipping past where she stood in the doorway and heading towards the pitch.
“How are you feeling about your time here so far?” The captain asked kindly, the beating sound of boots clicking against the floor echoing far too long in your ears.
“Um, good. It’s an honour playing for this team, so.” You shrugged, offering an almost robotic, rehearsed answer.
“And what about how you actually feel? Not what you’re supposed to feel?” Alexia inquired lightly, an earnest and sympathetic look across her face. Slightly suspicious.
“Well… still good. It’s just different, isn’t it. Yeah.” You mumbled, cheeks flushing bright red as you crossed your arms tightly over your chest.
“Of course it is different. You were in Germany for five years, right?” You nodded affirmatively. “So it is a big, big change. I haven’t been anywhere else but here for twelve years, I cannot imagine adjusting to anywhere else.”
Oh, Ingrid. Seriously?
“I’m here though, I have to leave Germany behind.” You stated in a flat voice, honestly quite done with this topic but it’d be rude to voice so.
“If that is how you want to think, then do it like that. You have transitioned very well, we are all impressed.” Alexia shrugged with a soft smile, punching in the code for the storage cupboard and opening it soon after. “Grab the footballs, I will get some tiny goals. The others can get the rest when they’re done filling their faces.”
Thank god for that.
Alexia ended that conversation there, directing her focus on training from that moment on, much to your relief. All that you learnt from this day was that you needed to have a conversation with Ingrid. Your sixth sense was strong, even if to others it seemed like Alexia was just being an averagely kind person, you just knew.
The good thing was, you couldn’t quite call that day a disaster. In the end, you got through it, even squeezing in a few jokes and laughs here and there throughout the day.
It’s the next day that the first incident occurred. It happened like this; Ingrid isn’t in again, you learn she’s got some kind of stomach virus, so you turn up once more on your own. This time, it wasn’t quite so scary, but like yesterday you skipped breakfast again. And just like yesterday, Alexia met you in the changing rooms to do some early practice again. Except, there was one fatal flaw to your routine this day. It came back and bit you in the ass pretty harshly.
“Ale, what are you doing after this?” Mapi wondered from your right as she stood up after Jona had ended training for the day.
“Eh, nothing.” She shrugged, going to ask you the same thing as she reached her hands out to help you up.
For all you knew, the Spanish pair you were sandwiched between could be speaking absolute gibberish, nothing was registering. As soon as you stood up, everything went hazy. And then… your vision had gone, your body felt unbelievably heavy, and had it not been for Alexia’s tight grip, you’d have fallen back there and then.
“Hey!” Alexia called out in concern, feeling you go limp in her hold. “Mapi, she’s fainting!”
“What!?” Mapi cried, immediately falling to her knees as Alexia safely guided you to the floor.
“I don’t know, she just collapsed!”
Her voice dripped with worry as Mapi frantically looked around, only to find most people had headed inside already. Meanwhile, you were still awake, not totally out cold, but your eyes ached unbearably and you’d lost all control of your movements. Alexia’s hands flitted over your body, looking for any obvious problems but she couldn’t find any. She repeated your name over and over, only receiving somewhat of a whimper in reply.
“Mapi, go find someone, now!” Alexia demanded, the defender instantly rising to her feet and heading for the door. The captain turned back to you, her hands gently coming up to cradle your face where you lay on your side. “Hey, I need you to listen! Can you hear me?”
“Mhm.” You whined, providing the woman before you with an ounce of relief.
“What’s wrong? You need to tell me so we can help you, cariño, you just fainted on us.” She said frantically, her wide eyes boring into yours when you opened them.
Identifying the problem, even in your state, was quite simple. It was a common problem, something you were well versed with, though you rarely ever let it get this bad.
“Forgot to eat.” You mustered up your remaining strength, which really was very little, to answer her and quell her worries.
Thinking back to this moment in probably an hour’s time, you’d laugh at Alexia’s face when you said those three words, because she looked utterly perplexed.
“You forgot to eat?” Alexia repeated with a frown, but she couldn’t dwell on it much longer because Mapi came running over with the medical team hot on her tails.
“Is she awake?” The brunette woman asked desperately, opting out of kneeling back beside you so as to not overcrowd you.
“Yes, and she said she forgot to eat today?” Alexia looked up at her friend, refusing to shift out of the way and instead choosing to stick by your side.
“Oh, that would explain it.” Mapi sighed in relief, only puzzling Alexia more. Was this… normal for you?
The medics fussed over you, asking you questions and ultimately overwhelming you way too much, something Mapi notices quickly.
“Oye, basta, slow down. Her blood sugar is low, she needs something quickly. Get her an energy gel.” Mapi commanded them, now joining you by your head and smiling her bright smile down at you, combing back some of your hair. “Hola preciosa, we'll get you back feeling better soon.” Just as she said that, a member of the medical staff pulled out one of the energy gels the team used for games. “Can you have this for me? It will make you feel better, I promise.”
With a nod, the people around you helped you to sit up as Mapi tore open the gel packet, with Alexia still almost frozen in confusion. The defender noticed, grinning in amusement and quickly flicking her ear to bring her back down to earth.
“Ah! What's that for?” Alexia winced, watching on as Mapi shook her head and handed you the gel pack.
Your hand trembled as you raised it to your mouth, hardly possessing the strength to squeeze it enough to get anything out of it, but just as Mapi went to help you, Alexia got there first.
“It’s okay, here.” She does it for you, one hand on the packet and the other on your elbow that shakes under her hold. She seemed to be grounded now, knowing that it isn't the right moment to be wrapped up in her own thoughts when you're here in front of her, needing security and comfort whilst it takes a couple minutes to come back to yourself. “Easy with it. You'll feel better soon.”
And you did, literally no less than two minutes after having the energy gel, your nausea and dizziness and whatnot near enough disappeared. Though, your physical symptoms gave way for a barrage of anxiety, because this situation would consequently lead to an unwanted and challenging (but most likely necessary) conversation with Jonatan and the rest of the staff. They had also seen you, on the floor, near enough passed out, as a result of your own actions. You could only imagine the things they were thinking right now, and that unknown was scarier than the actual situation that had occurred beforehand.
“Feeling good now. Thanks everyone.” You said shyly, rising to your feet and avoiding everyone's gaze.
“You sure?” Alexia checked, giving you a look that tells you that you shouldn't even try to bullshit her.
“Well, a little bit… woozy, I guess. But much better than before, I swear.” You nodded, hating the feeling of everyone’s eyes on you.
“Let’s go inside, I’ll ask the catering staff to make up some food for you, if you want?” Mapi offered as her hand hovers against your back, not touching but guiding you back inside the main building.
“Okay.” You shrugged.
Meanwhile Alexia trailed behind, trying to figure out how, as captain, she could help this situation. It’s in her best interest to care for her team, and given what she had learnt, it was now clear that there was a lot more she could do than sit back and watch. She didn’t want to come across as overbearing, something Ingrid had warned her about, but she realised it was time to step in.
“Why don’t we go to one of the office rooms rather than the canteen?” She suggested just as Mapi went to open the door heading into said room. The defender should have thought of that sooner, but she’s glad her friend mentioned it, realising it’s most definitely the better option right now for you.
You were taken to an empty office, followed into the room by Alexia and Mapi and some of the physios, and if they weren’t overcrowding you outside, they definitely were now. In all honesty, as much as you were grateful for their care, you wanted to burrow under your duvet in bed at home and not surface for probably about a week. You wanted to grab a tray of cookies, eat them whilst seated on the edge of your bed so you didn’t get crumbs everywhere, and crawl under the sheets safe in the darkness of the four walls you had struggled to leave the past two days.
But no, you were here, stuck in a reality that in no way felt real at all. What were you doing here? Sat at a round table, surrounded by medical staff chatting between themselves, not really bothered about your blip anymore, whilst two of Spain’s greatest players stand off to the side, both pairs of eyes trained solely on you.
You, a no-name off the back of an unsuccessful run in Germany that had just collapsed after training. Them, Champion’s League winners and well-established in the sport for years already, and decades to come.
“Preciosa?” Mapi appeared beside you suddenly, speaking softly as her hand fell on your shoulder. “Is it okay if I leave now? Ingrid is still sick at home, I promised I would get back to her as fast as I could. If you need me to stay, I can. They won’t keep you here for much longer, they’re just making sure you eat before you get back home.”
She should be with Ingrid, her girlfriend who is much worse off at home. Not with you, who simply made a foolish mistake and was now wasting everyone’s time.
“Go home.” You told her as your own hands squeezed anxiously at your upper arms where they sat crossed on the table.
“Okay.” Mapi smiled pitifully down at you, giving you a light forehead kiss before backing off. She pulled Alexia to the side, giving her a warning glare. “Look after her, for me and for Ingrid. Protect her, too. Don’t let them overwhelm her, she just wants to get home.”
“Sí. Of course.” Alexia replied firmly, a solid look in her eyes that Mapi knew to trust immediately.
The defender slipped out of the room with no further fuss, leaving you alone with Alexia and the medical staff. Not for long, though.
“Guys, could you give us a moment? And can someone go collect her food from the canteen, please.”
They nodded and stepped out of the room, Alexia closing the door softly behind them. She turned back to you, watching as you kept your head down and focused on the shapes you traced on the wood of the table. Your shoulders were visibly tense, so uptight they’re basically touching your ears, and she noticed just how intensely your leg was bouncing up and down.
“Do you need anyth-”
“Did Ingrid tell you?” You asked bluntly, gulping back the lump in your throat that really had no place making itself known at this moment - now was not the time for a meltdown. Save it for later, in the safety of your flat.
Alexia blew out a breath, coming over to perch on the edge of the desk a few seats away from you.
“If you’re talking about what I think you are, then… yes. She did tell me.” She answered cautiously, trying to gauge your reaction but you didn’t give her much, just a single nod. “She did it with the best intentions though. It wasn’t to… purposely go behind your back. She just wants the best for you, and the more people that know, the more support you can have here.”
“I guess.” You murmured under your breath, clearing your throat after and moving to rest your chin atop your arms.
“Why… why didn’t you want anybody to know?” The midfielder wondered in a soft tone, trying hard not to scare you off or go over the top. If she wants to help you and understand you, which she desperately does, this is the pathway she has to, albeit reluctantly, go down.
“Wanted people to get to know me, not a label.” You frowned, hastily wiping the tear that slips out with the frustration slowly bubbling inside of you. “Didn’t want to be a problem for anyone. Wanted to fit in.”
Just like that, it all clicked for Alexia.
The feigned smiles, sometimes forced laughter, the troubled look on your face whenever you thought you were alone, all of it adds up. You had repressed parts of you so that things went as smooth sailing as possible, so that people didn’t think any differently of you or immediately feel drawn away like they often did. The biggest part of you, what makes you you, is the one thing you didn’t want people to see, out of nothing but complete and all-consuming fear. And Alexia would be damned if she let you go on like this.
“Can I take a seat next to you?” She said quietly, a hint of a smile on her face when you nodded again. She did exactly that; without making too much noise in the still room, she pulled up the chair next to you and sat down, her eyes raking up and down your face.
“If I told you that I don’t think any differently of you at all, would you believe me?” She began with.
You just shrugged dismissively, not having moved a single muscle in the past few minutes apart from breathing and blinking. If you don’t move, if you don’t draw attention to yourself, perhaps this whole thing will disappear. A girl can dream.
“Because I don’t, cariño. I really don’t. You are not a problem for any of us at all. You face different struggles than us, but nobody thinks of you as anything less than a great player and an even better person. We are all glad you are here. I and others on the team will face different struggles than you, and I can bet you would never think any differently of us. Am I right?”
Her words break through the defensive wall you’d put up to protect yourself from anything else around you. A common feature of the start of your meltdowns, except it’s quite possible that your captain had just stopped it from going any further.
Hesitantly, you sat up from your slouched position and wiped tiredly at your face.
“No, I would never.” You told her, slumping back against your chair and fiddling with the drawstring on your shorts.
“Exactly. You don’t need to worry about any of that at all, I promise. You are one of us now. A culer. We will take care of you.” She smiled brightly, you can hear it in her voice. So for the first time since you’d entered the room, you turned to look at her, only to find her eyes were filled with earnesty and kindness. And… perhaps for the first time since you’d arrived in Barcelona, you truly did feel like you belong here. Like you could make a life for yourself here, against all odds.
“Thanks.” You sniffled, feeling the remnants of your outburst fade away, only to leave overwhelming exhaustion in its wake.
“It’s okay. You can come to me anytime for anything. There will always be someone here for you to talk to, and I’ll be the first to fight for you if that’s ever necessary.” Now, you were actually smiling. A genuine one, too.
“I think Ingrid might beat you to it, actually.” You teased her, watching as she grins.
“You’re probably right.” She chuckled, before pausing. You already knew what she was about to say before she opened her mouth. Neurotypicals are just way too predictable. “How did you know Ingrid told me?”
“You can just tell when someone knows. They treat you differently.” Alexia frowned anxiously at that.
“I didn’t… did I treat you differently?” She questioned, along with a poor attempt at disguising the undertones of fear in her voice.
“You haven’t, not really, but… I don’t know, I can just tell instantly. It’s hard to explain. You haven’t treated me differently, but I could tell you knew compared to when you didn’t know. The look on your face too. But thank you for… just everything so far. You have helped a lot, so.” You shrugged. She smiled, a little in relief, but nodded nevertheless.
“You don’t need to thank me. Now, can I ask some more about what happened today? You said you forgot to eat?”
“Yeah. It’s just because my routine was messed up, that’s all. Yesterday morning I ate before training because Ingrid had baked me some pastries, but today I had none left and then genuinely forgot. It happens sometimes, it’s just part of it.”
“Part of what?”
“Autism.” Duh.
“Oh. I did not know that.” Alexia stated simply.
“Yeah, well, most people don’t.” You told her. Alexia nodded understandingly, a plan of action already formed in her mind.
“I’m sure you already know this, as an athlete, but it’s important for your safety that this doesn’t happen again. So I have a solution in mind that could help.” You hummed to tell her to continue. “I can ask either the catering staff here, or find a private chef, to start meal prepping for you. We can organise it on the club’s behalf so that you don’t have to pay anything. I will go with you, or for you if you’d like, to Jonatan and help sort it out for you. You can meet with a nutritionist to figure out what food you need and tell them what you do and don’t like, we can sort it all out for you. It wouldn’t be a problem.”
Oh. You’d never thought about that before.
“I guess that could work.” You decided after a few moments of consideration.
That would actually be a really helpful solution. Certainly one less thing to worry about, and it could add a secure layer to your routine. An important one too.
“Would you be okay with that?” Alexia wondered, smiling when you nodded. “Good. Leave it to me, I will get it sorted for you.”
She paused again, clearly hesitant about something. You raised an eyebrow at her, trying to coax it out of her with a look, but you couldn’t help the amused smile on your face at the sudden, faint blush that landed on her cheeks.
“What is it?”
“Uh… there is no way to ask this without coming across as… very forward, to say the least.” She started, shaking her head at her own ridiculousness. “May I get your number? For captain’s reasons, of course.”
“Right.” You smirked, watching as she shakes her head, this time at your teasing, and grabs a pen from the stationary pot in the centre of the table. “And what shall I write it on?”
“Well… just use my hand, I guess.” She suggested, offering the back of her hand out for you. You grinned and gently took hold of it, jotting down your number for her.
“There you go, Capi.” You smiled, clicking the pen and putting it back.
Not long after that, one of the staff members came in with the food Alexia and Mapi had organised for you. So, leaving your captain with a promise that you'll eat it the second you walked through your apartment door, you went home. It was a great meal, and if it'd be the catering staff at Barcelona that would do your meal prep, well, it'd be a great deal.
That night went just like the others; you relaxed for some time to decompress after training, until you eventually started feeling somewhat human again, and arose from bed to do one of any of your hobbies that you felt like doing that night. Reading, watching movies, drawing and painting, listening to music, or any others that pique your interest that night.
On some occasions, you'll be so mentally exhausted from your day that none of them seem at all appealing, and it takes a lengthy period of time to feel yourself again. An hour, the rest of the evening, or sometimes even the whole week. After especially hard times, it could take weeks. Fortunately you hadn't been through such events in years, but the fear of falling into that hole ever again was always present in the back of your mind.
The thing about having this disorder is that some things never change. Most things never change. You learn to cope, you can heal from past experiences, but in the grand scheme of it all, things never change. Certain events, people, even words can still be triggers. No amount of therapy or coping mechanisms or whatever, can help. You were born this way, and you would die this way.
You would live a life and still struggle with even the most mundane things. Washing dishes was a no-go, the sensory issues were way too intense for that one. A day without showering first thing in the morning was automatically a write off. Bad performances in matches could still lead to a meltdown on certain days. One wrong look from someone can send you spiralling.
Autism was a blessing and a curse. It made you who you are; you have no idea who you would be without it. Yet, at the same time, it could debilitate you to such extreme degrees that… at night, when you were alone under the disguise of darkness, you can't help but wonder what you could have done with your life had you not been born with this burden.
And with the day you'd had already, well, the only way you'd learnt to get over these things were to move on from them. That's what you had to do. If you become too concentrated on them, analysed every detail that went wrong, thought about every opinion those who witnessed it could hold, you'd suffer for it more than you needed to.
You couldn't move on if others couldn't move on though.
Unknown: Did you get home safe?
There was most likely only one person it could be, but where's the fun in that?
You: Depends who I'm talking to…
Alexia: It's Alexia??
Too easy.
You: I knew it was you, dumbass. Yes I got home safe, thank you. Food was great too :)
Although, when a few minutes went by after that last text, the doubts came flooding in. Did you take it too far with her? It was a bit ballsy to say that, she's just checking in on you. Captain duties.
Then again, who was it calling you?
“Hello?” You frowned, and this was another instance where you're cursing yourself, because why was your heart racing and cheeks burning at one random phone call?
“Dumbass, huh?” Came a smug voice, and then your heart was racing for another, more light-hearted reason.
“Yeah, sorry about that… apparently I'm a bit of a keyboard warrior.” You blushed sheepishly, relieved beyond belief when the woman down the line laughed.
“Don't worry about it. You're feeling okay now, sí?”
“Yes, fine. You know, I didn't plan for today to happen. It just did.” You mumbled, still embarrassed by it all.
“I know, no one blames you for it. I just wanted to check in with you.”
“I'm good, thanks. I've only ever had that happen like once before, I guess training on an empty stomach isn't the greatest idea in the world.” You joked lightly, Alexia humming in agreement.
“How does it happen? You said your routine was messed up, how did that lead to you forgetting?”
“It's a long story.” You sighed, but Alexia doesn't care.
“I have a free evening.” She said simply. This woman.
“Well… every training session so far, Ingrid has met me in the morning at my apartment beforehand so we can travel in together. She normally checks in with me, asks how I'm feeling and if I've eaten and whatnot. But she was ill, which I obviously don't blame her for, by the way. So not having her with me these past two days has terrified me quite a bit. She's basically the thing that holds my whole morning routine together. I guess, because she wasn't there, everything just flew out the window.” You explained, but things still weren't quite adding up in Alexia’s mind.
“So how does that relate to you forgetting to eat? Do you not get hungry?”
“Not like normal people do. One of the things with autism is that… we're not really in tune with our bodies? Like, I don't often get hungry or thirsty, I have to force myself to remember to eat and drink. And when I don't, I only realise I haven't done either of the two when I start feeling ill, like today. But food and drink feel like a chore, which is another reason I forget too. It's different when it comes to football though, being an athlete has taught me to be in tune with my body in terms of injuries, but not for anything else. It's weird.”
“Wow, I never knew that before. That's interesting.” She commented. She's got a lot to learn.
“I prefer… inconvenient.” You said with a shy smile, glad to hear Alexia chuckle at that.
Unexpectedly, for quite some time after that, the pair of you just… talked. A lot. Like, for an hour. About everything - from what pastries Ingrid baked you, to a few more facts about yourself and your ASD, and everything in between.
It's unnervingly natural. Fun too, but also a little odd. Is she doing it out of pity, or..?
“I almost forgot the other reason I called you.” She said out of nowhere, the smile on her face audible once again. “We have our pre-season dinner this Friday, the whole team is going. You should come.”
A dinner? At a restaurant? Oh god.
“Oh, I… it sounds good, but I don’t know, I-”
“Hey, why not?” She questioned gently.
“Just, they’re not really my scene.”
In a split second, Alexia attempted to think back on all she knew about anxiety to combine it with the very little information she knew about autism, hoping the two overlapped somewhat. Luckily for her, they do.
“The club rents out the restaurant so it’ll just be the team and a few senior staff members. It shouldn’t be too loud. It’s more like a celebratory dinner before the season starts, so there's no partying or anything like that at all. I really hope you come, but I understand if not. There’s no pressure.”
Damn you, Alexia.
“Okay. Okay, I'll go.”
—
Normal order resumed for the rest of the week; Ingrid recovered from her short 48-hour bug and returned to training like she hadn't even had a day off. Her being back also meant your mind was a hell of a lot more at ease, even if Alexia had offered to see you every morning.
There was one other thing you were blessed with: obliviousness. Because, during the car ride to training the day after your phone call with the captain, the smirk that Mapi greeted you with in the rearview mirror after you tell her what happened once she headed home, is definitely not confusing at all. Definitely not.
That smirk made a comeback far sooner than you'd like.
“Say that again?” Mapi asked with a squint to her eyes, forcing down the laughter she so desperately wants to let out.
“Alexia is driving me to the team dinner.” You repeated the sentence you'd just said for her, looking to Ingrid for help. “Ingrid, tell her to behave please.”
“María, come on. Alexia is just doing her a favour, you know she's not a fan of driving.” Ingrid said whilst nudging her girlfriend, though secretly she's hiding some intense excitement levels under her very good poker-face.
“Exactly! Screw you, Mapi.” You sighed dramatically, turning back to the mirror as you put your earrings in.
“So you're sure you don't need us to drive you there?” Mapi asked suspiciously, and there was that stupid smirk again.
“Ugh, yes! I am making friends, you should be happy!” You groaned, fixing the shorter defender with a dagger-like glare in the reflection.
“More than fr-”
“Okay! Are you ready, snuppa? When is Alexia coming?” Ingrid interjected, discreetly stomping on her girlfriend's foot.
“She's on her way, she'll be here any minute now.” You answered after checking your phone. “You know, I can't rely on you guys forever like you're my parents or something. I love you, but I don't love you that much. And I'm sure you feel the same.”
“No!” Ingrid cried out in a way that's entirely too theatrical. She came over to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “I do love you that much, it's María you need to worry about.”
“I do worry about her sometimes. You should too, Ingrid.” You murmured, Ingrid humming in agreement as you watched her Spanish counterpart… busy herself in your fridge?
“María, out of there! We are literally going for dinner right now!”
“Ingrid, princesa, you need to work on your English- we're not at dinner ‘right now’, that is why I am in the fridge.”
“Guys! Alexia is here, let's go. I'll see you at the restaurant.” You kissed Ingrid’s cheek and flicked Mapi’s forehead as you ushered them out the door, locking it behind you and making your way down to the ground floor.
Alexia was there, waiting for you whilst leaning against her car, and a smile tugged at her lips the second she saw you. You heard some commotion behind you, most likely Mapi being scolded by Ingrid, but you shut it out as you headed over to the midfielder, fighting back a ridiculously cheesy grin.
She greeted you the same way she did on the first day she met you - enveloping you in a warm hug that really shouldn’t be as comforting as it was. Not a big deal. Regardless, you both clambered into the car and made your way to the restaurant.
Thankfully, the evening went surprisingly well. It was a very low-key evening, just like Alexia said. In fact, you might even go as far as to say you enjoyed it, that’s a welcome revelation. And it seems you weren’t the only one that had discovered something new.
“Can I ask you something?” Alexia said on the drive back to your apartment.
“Sounds like there’s no stopping you.” You replied, smiling when she teasingly rolled her eyes.
“At dinner, when Patri asked why you don’t drink, you said ‘long story short, I don’t like it’ so I was just wondering what you meant by that?” Alexia asked, before almost immediately regretting it. “I mean, you don’t have to answer, it’s your business, but… if there’s anything we should be mindful about, then let me know.”
Who needed alcohol when you had a tendency to lose your inhibitions whenever you got too exhausted?
“No, not really any problems. I don’t have any issues with people drinking around me, I just have a bit of a history with it but it’s nothing big. It’s fine.” You shrugged, trying to keep your eyes open as the streets of Barcelona passed by your window.
“What… what happened?” Alexia pressed gently.
“Well, when I was about seventeen, I started going through a really hard time. I had just dropped out of school, I’d had some trouble with friends, I was basically struggling quite badly. I started partying and drinking a lot, way more than I should have. Then I began to rely on it too much, just to get me through really basic stuff. It made me feel normal, it got rid of the voice in my head and it made me feel like a functioning person of society because it was what everybody else did. One day I decided it was best that I don’t drink at all, and it’s easier to tell people I don’t like it but actually I’m just scared of drinking because of all it reminds me of. So, I avoid it.” You explained, rather nonchalantly.
The mental exhaustion was hitting hard that night, it was evident in the way you spoke. There was one explanation; dissociation. Dinners were not your favourite things in the world, they were a challenge to get through even when you were in the best company. Small talk, food, the sound of people eating, the scrapes of cutlery against ceramic, and the attention on some occasions being entirely on you? Yeah, a big no go. Which is why you were so tired, so distant, because your mind was in protection mode to keep you running until you got home.
Talking about your past was difficult, you’d come a long way and it felt counter-intuitive to talk about the bad times when you’d worked so hard to come to a good place. Yet, here you were, baring your soul about a topic you normally kept to yourself. You don’t even feel at least a little bit anxious at the fact you’d just spilled that secret. Alexia takes all the concern you normally feel and keeps it for herself.
“I’m sorry you went through that, cariño. Thank you for telling me.” She smiled sadly over at you, an ache growing in her heart at your defeated demeanour where you sit in her passenger seat. “Are you feeling okay? You don’t seem like yourself.”
“Tired. So tired.” You sighed. Even just talking felt like a chore in that moment. “Wanna get home, s’all.”
“Okay, we’re almost there now.” She said, “I’m proud of you for coming today. I know you weren’t a fan of the idea initially but you came, and everybody was so glad that you did. I am really proud of you, and so are Ingrid and Mapi too.”
The woman to your left surprised you everyday with each act of kindness she was showing. She hardly knew you, she hardly knew of your struggles, but she was adamant to learn and show just how deeply she cared. You were beyond grateful for her and all she’d said and done, even if you couldn’t verbalise that just yet.
All you could do was offer a simple nod, almost entirely mute as a result of how utterly overstimulating the day had been. You had loved it, sure, but sometimes when days like today left you in such a dejected state that you could hardly talk, there were still times if you wondered if fighting for a somewhat normal life was worth it.
From then on, the rest of the drive home was silent. Alexia dropped you off, made sure you knew to contact her or Ingrid or whoever you felt comfortable speaking to should you need them, and that was that. You got inside, were barely able to get yourself changed, before passing out as soon as you got into bed.
—
A few weeks went by and it was more of the same. After that dinner, the team really clamped down and focused on getting everybody ready for the start of the new season. Training at Barcelona was different to anything you’d ever experienced before; it was intense, but light-hearted. There was competition, but it was healthy, everybody egged each other on even if they wanted to win. Ingrid was right, you had never found training this enjoyable before. You had to put that down to the people though, if it wasn’t for them then you’d never feel as comfortable as you do now.
There were blips, there were still obstacles, but apart from that time you fell ill after training , there hadn’t really been any meltdown-inducing moments. Just a lot of burn-out and exhaustion, but you were near enough a pro at dealing with that now.
The environment was… perfect for you. And one factor of that outcome is definitely down to the help of the famous three you had near enough attached yourself to since your arrival.
But the main factor to how well you had settled in was down to you. At some point along the way, not that the exact date mattered or anything (at exactly 12:02 on Monday the 26th of August), you hit a milestone that you had never managed to reach before.
It was unplanned, but once the initial shock had worn off and the anxiety left, you teared up in the arms of Ingrid at the pride you felt towards yourself. Then Mapi joined in with the hug, and so did Alexia, then… so did the whole team too.
For the first time, you were honest with your team. For the first time, you told them that you had autism. And for the first time, you weren’t suffocated by that prospect. When they all came together to hug you, it wasn’t just a physical embrace, it was them fully accepting you even with this burden you held and championed every day of your life. Though, with the support of others, it was hard to think of it as a burden. The gravity of a secret this big had weighed you down for years, but… now, your chest had never felt so light.
They supported you when you arrived, but the extremes this Spanish team took didn’t quite register until the week before the first game of the Liga F season. Fortunately for you, the first game of the season was at your new home of football, the Estadi Johan Cruyff. So, to help settle the rising nerves you were feeling as game day got closer, the club had organised a training session for you at the stadium a few days before. The more familiar you were with your surroundings, the less you had to worry about on the day. And, as everybody knew, the only thing you needed to worry about for your debut would be how well you did on the pitch.
What you didn’t know though, was that every member of your team was waiting in the stands for you to walk out. And the second the sound of boots hitting the floor echoed from the tunnel through the empty stadium, Mapi was up on her feet to cheer and encouraged her teammates to do the same. The only person that hesitated was Ingrid, but when she saw the look on your face as your te- your friends outwardly rallied behind you so openly and so freely, she became the loudest one of them all. That was the perfect way to prepare for game day, you really couldn’t have asked for a better group of people to work with everyday.
Were you jittery and wracked with nerves as you waited on the sidelines to be substituted in at the 70 minute mark? Yes, but the second you took your first step on the grass with the crowd’s applause as your welcome, you fixated on the game and everything else was just background noise.
From a young age, before you had even heard of the word autism, football had very obviously been your special interest, otherwise known as the one random topic out of everything in the world to take over your life.
You would spend hours in your backyard, kicking a ball against the side of your house, driving your family crazy. The walls of your bedroom were covered, corner to corner, in posters ranging from your favourite players, to clubs from all over the world. Christmases and birthdays as a kid were, to you, all about what from your presents you could add to your collection. Kits, boots, scarves, match-day programmes, magazines, even trading cards. Back at your childhood home in Norway, all these things were stored away in the attic, still items you cherished.
As you got older and life got a bit more difficult, football became your escape. School was exhausting, people were exhausting, but football was something you could do on your own. No one bothering you, no one expecting anything from you, it was a time you could forget the world and all its misdemeanours, and just relax. And honestly, that’s all you planned for it to be. It was hard to imagine it being anything else than just a hobby.
All it took was one game to change the whole trajectory of your life. A game of girls against boys at your school at the age of only eleven, and the next day your sports teacher had gotten you a trial at the local academy. You passed it with flying colours, and flourished in the sport from there.
…Until one random day when you were fourteen, your mother sat you down for a conversation you never could have expected. But once you'd had time to dwell on her words, everything made sense.
You had autism spectrum disorder.
It wasn’t made official until the assessment process was over and you received your diagnosis, but that was the day it felt like your life had been irreversibly changed. Your view of the world changed with one conversation, and it was as if everything you thought you knew was wiped completely. Like you had been thrown into the ocean with no one and nothing around to help.
All the tantrums, the bad behaviour at home compared to being a model student at school, the fussy eating habits, and the endless list of out-of-the-norm habits you had - it added up to this one, new label. The tantrums became meltdowns, the reasoning behind your behavioural differences were from spending the whole day surrounded by people and masking to fit in which led to you being so overwhelmed and overstimulated, your mind went into overdrive and didn’t know what to do. The fussy eating turned out to be sensory issues, with the textures and tastes of certain foods making you physically ill.
There was so much to learn that some days it felt like too big a challenge to tackle. Then there would be the days where you were up all night, the light of your family laptop kept hidden under the blanket you draped over yourself, as you researched this life-changing disorder until the sun rose.
It’s funny, really, how quickly your life can change with just three words.
For years, you had been defeated by it, succumbing to the assumptions that you could never amount to anything more than the label forced upon you, but look at you now. Providing a world class through ball to the most recent Ballon D’Or recipient to tie off a 3-0 win in the first game of the season.
You had learnt at some point in the last twelve years that the only choice you had was to live with it. Make the most of it. This was your one life, you had to make it work. You were adamant to thrive for the others that couldn’t, for the 1 in 13 women that didn’t believe they were strong enough to fight back, and to prove to the world that this disorder didn't hold you back.
They wouldn’t know that your mind could be your own worst enemy, or the self-deprecating thoughts you could have whilst your face gave away no hints, or that sometimes you didn’t believe in yourself and the anxiety was so intense that you could be stuck in bed for days, even weeks, at a time. All they saw right now was your team, FC Barcelona, rushing over to celebrate you rather than the goal scorer because they knew what it meant to you. The world would only ever see your victories, because they had no business to strike you when you were already down. You were strong, you were worth it, and most importantly, you had done it. You’d made it to the exact point you dreamed of. That’s all that mattered.
Unfortunately, it only takes one bad thing to set you down an unwanted path.
Part 2
#woso x reader#fcb femení#fcb femeni#fcb femení x reader#alexia putellas x reader#ingrid engen#mapi león#fridolina rolfö#barcelona femeni#barcelona femení#barcelona femeni x reader
849 notes
·
View notes
Text
Not Just Friends - 6 -
M.List : Prologue : Part 1 : Part 2 : Part 3 : Part 4 : Part 5 : 5.5k words
Childhood best friends turned into something more, at least with the label. Katsuki Bakugo, a fast-rising hero and fast-learning guy who is ever so slow in getting attached to and loving someone. Even three long years into a relationship, and your friends even forget you're even dating. Nothing happening, spare a few kisses.. like 3 kisses, during high school. Graduated and living together, and you guys have done absolutely nothing to further the relationship. Are you sure you're not just friends? Also not edited!! CW: Smut, brief domestic violence discussion, virginity loss, aggressive flirting from creeps, gore with pro hero stuff (lmk if i missed any) Applies to all chapters regardless of it is in said chapter.
"Photos have been released, of the two of you," you shared a look with Katsuki from across the table, "Together. At the camping resort you went to this previous weekend."
Katsuki's PR manager was in front of you. Arms placed on the table as she clasped her hands together. Face stern and hair slicked back into a ponytail. The definition of professional. The opposite of what you looked and felt right now. You've been sweating your ass off since you got told to come in.
"Are you sure they know it was us?" Katsuki fixed his posture, sitting up straight for the answer to his question. The two of you haven't necessarily came forward with your relationship, but you haven't been hiding it. Still, you preferred to not be public. Mainly to protect your work, everyone would discredit you if they knew you had personal ties to the number two pro hero that led beyond friendship. But also because you knew the danger, you were targeted enough as his best friend.
"Yes," she said bluntly.
"Maybe they didn't see me?" you voiced your hope aloud.
"Look, they know it was the both of you," she sighed, "We need to focus on how to fix this. It needs to be address before it gets worse, and it will get worse, so I suggest acting now."
"Can I see the fucking pictures?" Katsuki ordered, sick and tired of not knowing entirely what's going on.
She clicked away at her keyboard, turning her laptop to face you two. "This was posted by a couple that were there," she showed the photo Katsuki took with the couple that almost caught you at the pond. "And this," she clicked to a photo that showed the lake, "was posted as well. You can clearly see Chargebolt, Red Riot, and Cellophane. And in the background it is also easy to see the two of you being," she coughed, "intimate. They've been able to connect the dots that it was you that he was kissing," she looked at you, "With your connection with their class."
Your stomach dropped. Words just fell from your brain. You were used to the press but not for these reasons. Mainly just for your work, or how you made all number one, two and three top heros support gear and costumes.
"So what the fuck should we do?" Katsuki crossed his arms, face scrunched in thought.
"We need you to make a statement," she paused, prepared for Katsuki to snap. He hated making statements. When all he did was nod, she continued, "We need to do this quick before rumors catch wind." Both you and her were glad that he wasn't being difficult about this.
"What rumors can even be made?" you were curious how bad the drawback could be, trying to see if you could lessen the stress for you and Katsuki.
She looked at you, an apology on her face already, "It is already being said that you are using him to get to Deku, wanting to get the best pro heroes under you." You physically winced. "It is also being said you are cheating on Deku with Dynamight."
Katsuki scoffed, rooling his his eyes as he threw his hands up, "So what the fuck do I say? This is bullshit."
"I've arranged a interview for tonight, they'll ask about it there and you will give as much truth as you want. Talk about how long you've dated and the bond you two have, you need a united front," She explained, "Deku needs to also make a statement that you have not had any romantic relations," she turned to you.
"Of course, I'll call him now," you stood up from your chair, grabbing your phone. Knowing that he was terrible with emails and likely wouldn't notice anything happened until it was too late for the press. Too focus on crime and other heroic things.
"Good, tell him to do it as soon as possible," she instructed.
You squeezed Katsuki's shoulder on your way out, leaving him to discuss about what to talk about in the interview.
Dialing Izuku's number the second you closed the door, walking towards the stairway so you could walk off the stress as you made your way to Katsuki's office, the next floor up.
He answered when you opened the door to the stairway, "Whatssup?"
"I need a favor," you immediately started with.
"What's wrong," he asked concerned. You could hear the wind blowing through his phone, he was likely jumping his way back his office.
"Could you do an interview tonight or something?" you walked up the stairs while talking to him, letting your body move on autopilot and lead the way to Katsuki's office.
"For what?"
"Katsuki's and my relationship got leaked, picture proof and everything," you confessed, "Now there's rumors that I'm cheating on you or some shit." You ran the hand that wasn't holding the phone through your hair. Before dropping it to open the stairway door, keeping your head down as you walked through the office.
"So I need to clear the air?" he concluded, you could hear him land on a building, taking a break from jumping.
"Yes, please," you sighed, "Just talk about how we're best friends. I don't think you have to do an interview, I think a social post might help, ask your manager."
"Of course, I'm happy to help," he smiled, "How are you and Kacchan doing?"
"I'm a little rattled, I didn't think this would happen," you opened the door to Katsuki's office, briefly waving to his manager. "I don't know how Katsuki is doing, he's still with his PR manager."
Izuku laughed nervously, "He's going to kill me."
"It's not your fault," you reassured, "he knows how crazy the internet is." You stood in front of the window, it was a floor to ceiling window that captured the view of the city perfectly. "Uraraka won't be mad right?" you asked, you've never been close to her but you knew her and Z were together.
"No, she'll understand," Izuku confirmed.
"Good, I would of felt horrible," the weight on your shoulders was slowly lifting.
"Well, I should talk to my manager about what to do," Izuku said his goodbyes before he hung up.
It was only Tuesday and your week was already shit. Barely got through lunch before his manager told you to meet with PR. The city was still buzzing with life, unbothered by how much yours was changing. It felt weird, to know each of the small humans from this distant, had their own life and motivation.
"Hey."
You jumped from your spot near the window, "Asshat," you said clutching your heart.
"How are you doing?" Katsuki stepped into the office, letting the door fall shut as he walked to stand beside you.
"I've been better, you?" you looked at him, his face was still scrunched with thought.
"I'm annoyed," he said plainly, "The one fucking time we kiss in public and it's everywhere."
He crossed his arms, his elbow slightly bumping you from where he stood. You hummed your agreement, "When's your interview?" The both of you were looking out the window, trying to puzzle together how to avoid the drawback.
"Right after work, with fucking Heroes' Gossip," he grumbled.
"I'm sorry," you apologized, knowing how much he hated every part of this.
"Was gonna happen eventually," he sighed, "Is that nerd gonna help?"
You nodded, "Yeah, he might make a social media post or something, I told him to listen to his manager."
"Good," he said plainly, letting the conversation end.
Everything was going to change now, it'd be impossible to go back to normal now. With the grief of your old life already setting in, you rested your head on his shoulder. He'd be the one stable thing, even if it got rocky.
---
You had the interview pulled up on the TV, waiting for Heroes' Gossip to introduce him. They've been teasing a surprise guest the entire show, waiting until the last few minutes to bring him on. You've been dealing with the show for the past 40 minutes with no sign of him. It was nice to watch for once though, but it felt like you were intruding on some of the topics. They brought up Mirko's lovers and then talked about spotting Best Jeanist in and out of the hospital, automatically assuming he had a horrible disease. It made you feel gross to watch.
Wondering into the kitchen you grabbed a glass of wine, wanting something to help make the show a little less painful.
When you sat back down they finally announced for Katsuki to come on. Having him grumpily stomp on set until he sat down near the obnoxious interviewer.
"So, Dynamight," she addressed him head on, "There's been some photo's leaked of you and the tech genius," she announced your name to the world. You took a long sip, trying to shake the unease feeling for being known as someone who was with Dynamight rather than a tech genius. The interviewer displayed the pictures his PR manager showed you earlier on screen, "Is this you and her?"
"Yeah," he answered flatly.
"So you and her were making out at this lake, correct?" She pushed, surprised she got this far already.
"Yeah, what about it?" you could see that he was close to snapping, face furrowed entirely as his arms were crossed.
"Despite the claims of her and pro hero Deku being together?" the interviewer smiled, glad to see she was riling him up.
He rolled her eyes, "As if she'd date him."
"Is she not?"
"No, I've been dating her for three god damn years," he confessed to the public.
The interviewer blinked in surprise, quickly getting back onto the questions, "You're not concerned they are seeing each other behind your back?"
"I've known them both since I was five, they aren't like that," he answered simply.
"That also means that they have known each other that long, you're not worried about their connection?" she pushed for more, irritated that Katsuki wasn't lashing out like normal.
"Lemme prove it to you dumbasses," you cringed at his swearing, it wasn't good press for him to swear during interviews. He was grabbing his phone out of his pocket, quickly pressing buttons before he put the phone on speaker, letting everyone listen to it ring.
"Hey," Izuku's bubbly voice echoed through the mic.
"Are you fucking with my girlfriend?" Katsuki was straight to the point, likely not having warned Izuku of his plan before hand.
"No! Why would i do that?! You know that it is just the press going on right? Anything for a story-" before he could ramble on anymore, Katsuki hung up on him.
"See?"
"Well that doesn't prove much," the interviewer was at a lost for words at this point.
Knowing that Katsuki had a handle on this, you walked back to the kitchen, looking for something to eat. All the premade dinners were eaten already so you'd have to cook something from scratch. The voices from the TV faded from your mind as your rattled through the ingredients to use. Deciding on a fried rice. You pulled out the vegetables and placed them to the side as you set the rice to cook.
Your phone buzz and you answered without a thought, "Sup?"
"You fucking Deku?" you laughed at Katsuki's angry voice coming through your speaker. "Stop laughing dumbass."
"Sorry, I just saw you call him for the same thing. No, I am not. I'll say that on a truth quirk as well," you said absentmindedly cutting up the vegetables.
"Great! We'll have you come in soon to do just that," you heard the interviewer cheer though Katsuki's side of the phone.
Katsuki grumbled, "I'm fucking out of here." You could only assume he left the set, hearing him stomp off. "Hey dumbass," his voice was near the mic, clear he turned the call off speaker as his voice was quieter and less aggressive.
"Yeah?"
"That was stupid, my PR agent is going to scream at you."
"Why?"
"Going under a truth quirk on TV is dangerous, you know so much confidental shit," he explained.
"Oh fuck," you realized how much you could spill if someone asked about too much. You felt as if the genius quirk you had wasn't much help.
"I'll be home soon," he skipped past it, saving the conversation for when he could see you.
"Okay," you nodded despite him not being able to see you, "I'm making some fried rice by the way."
"Thanks, see ya."
"Bye."
You put your phone back down, grabbing the now cooked rice and mixing it with the vegetables in a pan. You looked over the mess of the kitchen. You dirtied an extra pan for eggs last second, knowing Katsuki loved the extra protein. Walking back to the living room, you grabbed the wine glass and filed it some more in the kitchen to drink as you mixed the rice.
The rice was getting to a good mixture, just needing to heat for a little longer, you grabbed the eggs and dumped them in with the rest of the rice and vegetable, setting the pan aside on the stove.
You heard the door knob slightly move, as if Katsuki was having issues with the key. You glanced at the time, he wouldn't be over for another ten or so minutes. Fear gripped at your chest. You moved the finished pan of rice to the corner of the stove, putting the empty pan on the heat.
Before you could think of anything else to do, you heard metal fall to the ground. Turning around quickly you saw the doorknob melting off with the remains of it on the floor.
Looking towards the figure in the doorway you saw a girl, around your age. Maybe a couple years older. She looked insane, it sent a chill up your spine at how similar her glare was to Toga's. Her eyes were a bright red, her hair a darker shade as she wore torn up clothes, burn holes all throughout. As if she just got out of a fight.
"The fuck are you doing?" you forced yourself to question.
"So you're the bitch Katsuki is dating?" she ignored your question.
"How did you get up here?" you knew that the apartment probably wasn't the most secure, but you and Katsuki never had time to move. Still, security was set in place. Blood dotted her outfit as well, the smell of burnt flesh radiating off her.
She ignored you again, stepping closer. "You know, Katsuki's going to love me right? Once your out of the picture."
You couldn't help the slight laugh that slipped from your lips. Maybe Katsuki's cocky energy affected you more than you thought.
Her eyes glowed, "That funny to you?"
She was about arms length away at this point, you reached your arm slowly behind you, grabbing onto the handle of the pan. "Kinda," you shrugged.
"Such a cunt," the girl all but screeched, eyes glowing red. From the damage on the doorknob it was clear she had some sort of heat vision. Before she could burn hole through you, you picked up the pan and swung at her. Burning the side of her face and causing her to stumble. Keeping yourself aware of her eyes, you reeled the pan back and hit her straight on, letting the edge of the pan fall into her eyes.
She quickly started to grab at you, cornering you into the stove, blinded by your hits but still intent on hurting you. Digging her nails into your arm. Scratching as she managed to grab ahold of your hand during her flailing around, forcing it down onto the hot stove and burning you.
Filled with a new rush of adrenalin, you grabbed onto her hair with your free hand, yanking her off your hand and pushing her face into the stove. You felt horrible as she screamed, your and her burnt flesh tainting the air with a foul smell. Ruining the stove top in the process. You scrambled away from her after holding her down for a moment, grabbing the knife you used the the vegetables only 20 minutes ago. Almost slipping due to the wine that was spilt from her flailing around the stove.
You stole a glance at the clock, still five more minutes till Katsuki was home. All you had to do was not die in those five minutes.
The girl was standing back up when you looked back at her. Face half burnt as she held a crazed look in her eyes.
"That knife won't do anything," she pushed, "I've done my research, you hardly have a quirk. Another reason you aren't worthy of him."
You weren't interested in talking to her, you just waiting for her next move. "You know, we could end this here. Just stop fighting and Katsuki will talk to you," you suggested, throwing the offer out to distract her.
"With you in the picture, he won't talk to me," she said frustratedly. Her eyes lighting up again, having recovered from the hit to them.
She aimed for your stomach, you move to the side and crouched, kicking at her locked knees, cringing at the snap of it. The hit on your stomach burned through a lot, the pain causing you to hold a hand on yourself. While you were trained to survive, you couldn't handle it. The blood, the pain, the guilt that already worked its way into your bones. She fell down with a yelp. Pulling you with her, before she could get her other hand on you, you stabbed one hand through a cabinet. You stood up as straight as possible, pressing your slipper covered foot onto her head, forcing her to face the cabinet and away from you. Placing your other foot onto her free hand so she couldn't grab at you.
You wheezed, clutching both hands at your side now, pain getting to you. The girl was crying now, "My face! He won't love me if I look deformed." Her heat vision flickered on and off, burning a hole through the bottom cabinet. Slowly destroying your home with Katsuki.
"Shut up," you hissed, stepping on her hand harder.
The injury was getting to you, it was mostly cauterized but her heat vision burned a good depth into your side.
Katsuki kicked the door fully open, snapping his head to look at you. You most of looked crazy. Wearing his shirt from high school, barely visible shorts, fuzzy Deku themed slippers and standing above a very injured girl while bleeding from the wound of your side.
He stepped towards you, lifting you off the girl and making you sit on the floor next to the door. "Cops were already called by the way," he answered your question before you thought of it. "They'll be up here soon." He walked back to the girl who was panting now, going into shock from the pain, something you think you shared with her. He cuffed her quickly, making her quirk shut off. You couldn't be more thankful that he wore his hero outfit home.
With the girl contained, he walked back to you, "Is it just your side?"
You nodded your head aggressively, in too much pain to form words. He lifted the side of your shirt, wincing before putting it back down. Moving to pick you up and carry you.
"I need to get you to the hospital," he claim.
"What about that girl?" you forced out, sucking in a deep breath after. Eyes getting fuzzy as you looked at him.
"She tired herself out," he confirmed, the girl passed out and you felt like doing the same. Eyes blinking without any of your control.
"Kats?"
"What?"
"It hurts," you were only speaking to stay awake, not wanting to scare him anymore then you knew he was.
"You'll be okay, I promise," his voice waivered as he moved through the hallways, you didn't even know where you were at this point. The background slowly turning into black until you blinked the rest of the image away.
---
Everything was too bright, too loud, too stale when you woke up. You couldn't even open your eyes but you were overwhelmed. You're mouth lacked any taste besides meticalic. Muffled voices came from somewhere in front of you, a room away likely. You braced yourself heavily before opening your eyes. Seeing Katsuki in a chair pulled up to your bedside, book in his left hand as his right hand held onto yours. Flipping a page by placing the book into his lap and using his left to flip it. Never once letting go.
The light blurred everything but him, you could only put together the fact that you were in the hospital. He was wearing his glasses, the ones he hardly wore unless he was stress. It was always harder for him to read when stressed, to lessen the strain, he wore the glasses.
"Bright," is what you decided to croak out, voice rough from sleep and likely screaming from the events. Everything was blurred already.
His basically jumped out of skin at the sound of your voice, letting the book fall from his lap as he stood up straight. Looking over you.
"Lights off," is what you groaned next, unable to keep your eyes open in the blare of it for long.
"Fuck sorry," he rushed to turn the light off before returning to your side. "How are you?"
You only looked around now, happy to be without the strain of the light. Your right hand was covered in bandages, from where the girl slammed it against the stove. With how bad it hurt, you worried for her face. Your left side was also heavily wrapped. She burned entirely through you, you remember how burned your walls were before you passed out. Multiple cabinets having holes in them. "Our home is all messed up," you focused on.
Katsuki let out a laugh, it was his laugh that showed you were being ridiculous, when you looked back up at him with a frown he returned it, "You can't be serious?"
"I am," you pouted, looking down at your hands, "She fucked it all up."
"Yeah and you put a dent in her for it," he followed.
"She put a dent in me too," you changed you focus to your stomach. Acknowledging the hole in your side
He gripped tighter onto the railing at the top of your hospital bed. "I had our stuff moved out," he spoke, saying he won't let that happened again without any words.
"Where will we live?" you looked back up at him.
"I bought it on a whim, the first day you were out," he looked apologetic, "I think you'll like it. Safer than that shithole."
You grabbed onto his hand, "Okay, anywhere is home with you."
"The drugs makin' ya loopy?" he smirk down at you, pointing fun at your cheesy line but holding onto your hand nonetheless, gripping on tighter.
"Maybe," you blushed, looking away for moment to think over the feeling. Drugs were definitely dampening the pain right now.
"How are you though? Took quite a hit," he looked at your stomach as well. It reminded you on how he first saw it, likely seeing straight through you. It's probably why he rushed you to the hospital right after.
"Hurts," you mumbled, not looking down but staring at him instead. Wanting your focus off the pain. Looking over how soft the glasses made him look. It was something you always wanted to admire but rarely got to. His face looked softer in the barely light room, just having the glow of the hallway lights shine in.
"Figures, you put up a fight."
"I almost died," you clarified.
"But you didn't," he was trying to focus on the positives, for both you and himself.
You recalled him saying the first day you were out earlier, "How long was I out?"
"Four days," he answered, "Not too long, you were just tired."
You hummed, "When can we go home?"
"I'd have to call the doctor in."
You nodded in permission for him to do so, letting him go alert them. With the quality of the room, you figured that he had you in a hero hospital.
The doctor walked in and asked you to stay an extra day, claiming a healing quirk will be able to help you before you left tomorrow. You reluctantly agreed, mainly from Katsuki cutting in and agreeing for you. It was obvious he felt guilt. From the way he held himself and the way he spoke.
When the doctor left, the two of you sat in silence. Soaking in each others presences.
"Is she okay?" you asked.
"Who?"
"Crazy bitch," you labeled her as.
He looked at you confused, "Yeah, in jail."
"So I didn't hurt her badly?" you were trying to relive some of the guilt.
"No, you did. Put a hole into her hand and burned her face," he confirmed, "Something you did to protect yourself."
"Then why do I feel bad?"
He sighed, grabbing at your hand again and looking you in your eyes, "Cause you always do, you'll probably feel guilty for a while. But trust me, you gave that bitch what she deserved and I'm so fuckin' glad you did."
"How's the press?" you switched topics. Not even remotely proud of yourself for burning a girl's face.
"Everything's settled, police still need your report though," he told you softly.
"Okay," you took in a deep breath, flinching at the pain going up your side. Ignoring Katsuki eyes looking at you in worry. Trying to patch your guilt away.
---
You peered through the apartment door after Katsuki unlocked it and walked through. Taking in the view of the apartment, a clear upgrade from the last. After kicking off your shoes you noticed the empty space to the right, a perfect spot for a living room. Windows from floor to ceiling and a sliding door to excess the balcony, with just enough space for a long wrap around couch to loop around. Snug in its own cube. The left side was a nicely sized kitchen with a dining table near the middle.
The security on the way up was worth the apartment, it was beautiful. It was a good sized apartment overall, perfect for you. There's a total of three bedrooms and three baths. You wondered for a moment about where Katsuki would choose his bedroom. Shoto also lived in this apartment complex, so you knew it was safe. The thought of Shoto's scar hurt your soul, he hated that scare and you gave a random girl the same if not worse.
"We need to buy new furniture for the living room," Katsuki cut into your thoughts.
"Why?" you turned to him confused, you didn't have a wrap around couch but he didn't know your ideas.
He coughed, knowing you hated the topic already, " Other one is burnt."
"Oh," you said sadly.
"I also can't get shit here until Tuesday. Takes a week for em," he barreled through the bad news, "You can look up a couch and I'll buy it."
"I already know the one I want," you looked back at the space, "I saw it Monday online, we can go check the stores to see if it's in stock? If not we can look."
"I don't think you should be doing all that walkin'," he furrowed his face in distaste.
"Too bad," you pushed past your injury, walking back outside the apartment after slipping your shoes on, "We have nowhere to sleep, we can get a couch and have a movie night. Wait, do we need a new TV?"
"Yeah, other one was shit anyway," he put his shoes on and followed you out reluctantly.
---
You pushed past all press, keeping your head down as you walked in front of Katsuki, his arms around you to keep from touching you. It was horrible, worse than it ever was. After your police statement was in, the press went crazy. Needing every detail possible. The entire furniture store had to shut down while you shopped, it made you thankful for Katsuki's job for once. He saved the owners before so they easily shut down for him. Finding your perfect couch was easy enough, wasn't the exact one you saw online but it was even better. While you found the couch, Katsuki got the TV, both set to be delivered to your apartment during the next three hours.
So you and Katsuki got lunch and stopped by his agency in the mean time, him needing to grab some paper work to go over the next few days. Kirishima's bright smile welcoming you the second you walked upstairs.
"Hey!" he greeted, arms stretched out for you. Hugging you gently. "How are you?" he held you back by your shoulders as he looked over you.
"Alright," you answered watching Katsuki walk into his office, "I hurt like a bitch though."
Kirishima laughed warmly, "No doubt, sorry that happened. What you did was super manly though."
You cringed, "I thought you left the manly thing in high school."
"I say it on rare occasions," he smiled down at you.
"Say what?" Katsuki asked as he closed his office behind him, joining you again.
"Manly," you answered, leaning into his space, feeling safe. He hummed in reply, smiling down at you briefly before looking back at Kirishima, crossing him arms.
"You got my patrols cover till Tuesday right?" Katsuki asked.
"Yeah, Denki, Sero, Mina, me and even Midoriya are all taking a chunk of your hours," Kirishima smiled brightly.
"Till Thursday?" you looked up confused, Katsuki hated time off.
Katsuki refused to look at you. LIstening as Kirishima talked, "You need a break and we got it covered, don't worry."
He rolled his eyes, "Send me every detail that happens, I'll be available if absolutely needed."
"Got it," Kirishima gave a toothy grin. Likely happy that he convince Katsuki to take time off in general. You weren't surprised at him being at the hospital, but taking a week off was unknown for him. Yet he seemed perfectly okay with it.
---
Once home, you noticed the fridge was fully stocked. Katsuki's premade meals filling the shelfs. Glad to see no fried rice. Fruit also filling the shelfs.
It was the first thing you went for when you got home, ignoring the wrapped up couch and TV and going for the food. Afterall, Katsuki would set up the TV fully. Needing to wall mount it.
With a premade meal in your hands, warm and ready to eat, you stood at the counter and watched him work.
"So I remember saying I'd do an interview with a truth quirk," you brought up after a while, Katsuki humming to continue from where we set up the TV. "How do I do that without giving up information?"
"Aizawa is probably willing to help, he'll monitor you and turn off the truth quirk person if they ask something sensitive. Still don't know why you said that," he answered, cursing at the TV when it didn't hook into the slot on the wall mount easily.
"Just want to clear my name," you took another bite of food as you watched him grin in victory at the TV being attached to the wall now. Him plugging it in and starting to log into all the streaming apps and everything.
You joined him after finishing your food, pushing a part of the couch into the spot you wanted. "The fuck are you doin?" he spun his head towards you at the sound of the couch moving. "I'll do it, just fuckin' point where to go."
After huffing at him, you stood in front of the TV, facing the couch and leading him to place each section of the couch. Cutting off the wrapping afterwards and sitting in front of the TV.
"What are we watching?" he called towards you, you were digging through the little amount of stuff that Katsuki pack for you two. It was clothes and blankets, all you'd need until Tuesday. It was already Saturday as well.
You plopped down a big blanket for you to share and sunk into the couch, "I don't know," you mumbled. Watching as he clicked onto your favorite movie right after.
"Hate when you say that," he grumbled.
"Yeah sure," you leaned into his side, wanting to be as close as possible to him. The scare of the break in still getting to you. He messed with his hand for a moment before laying his arm over your shoulders, pushing you closer to him. It was something both of you clearly needed. Just the warmth of the other.
-Next Part-
In them m.list of this fic comment if you want to be added into a tag list <3
I'll no longer add people to the taglist if they haven't commented there. It's too much to keep up with all the new part. Hope you understand <3
@ldk3347 @suki0 @ez4ra @mithicakurogo @aomi04 @ellielover69 @minori-taiga1 @54fangirl @zoast32 @mushroomsneedystuff @kazuumii @snxwflwr @keiva1000 @thescarletwallflower @juicyfingers @atashiboba @ofcqdesi @americasass1942 @kaboomkayla @ilovedenk-i @iamyoursonly @albakugo @venusluvslove @fairiesgloss @limitedstar @i-bitch-you-bitch @drageonix24 @sweetpandabiscuitrebel @sinyaaa @xreiiss @oddball08 @imsuperawkward @lomlchi @anime-manga-fanatic @irlpadfoot @lord-goosifur @chocoyanchan @gollumsmygel @yuptha-tsme @icedemon1314 @alstrums @suki0 @yesiamrobbysimp @supersecretsamm @maeveorsomethinggg @ivuriexo @schniti-is-in-the-house @dumbbitchenergy17 @slaydispussaylikeademon @whydoyoucare866
(make sure your can be tagged, your blog might be hidden)
#not just friends katsuki#i like ruining innocent men#innocent men are insanely hot#the entire idea is based off smut#slow burn#innocent bakugo is an insane trope that i love#mha#bakugou katsuki#bakugou katsuki x reader#bnha bakugo katsuki#katsuki bakugo mha#katsuki bakugo x reader#mha x reader#x reader#bakugo#katsuki bakugou x reader#mha bakugou#bakugou x reader#bnha bakugou#my hero academia#virginity loss#bakugo is physically distant#izuku is your best friend#mha smut#fluff#smut#bakugo smut#smutty fanfiction#smutty fanfic#learning sex
726 notes
·
View notes
Text
Creator Spotlight: @jdebbiel
Deb JJ Lee is a non-binary Korean artist based in Brooklyn, NY. They have appeared in the New Yorker, New York Times, NPR, Google, Radiolab, and more. Their award-winning graphic memoir, IN LIMBO, about mental illness and difficult relationships with trauma, released in March 2023 from First Second.
Below is our interview with Deb!
Have you ever had an art block? If so, how did you overcome it?
That implies I am over my art block, but I’m still in it! I think about Kiki’s Delivery Service a lot and how she had to stop doing a thing, and that you can’t really force it, and you have to let it come back to you. It’s a pretty humbling moment, realizing there is more to life than just drawing. I’ve been trying to consume other content like reading or watching movies—anything that is not drawing-related—and to trust that it will come back to me. I think not being afraid to do the small pieces before committing to the big pieces is helpful. Because big pieces are what I am known for, I dig myself into a deeper hole, thinking that each piece has to be bigger than the last one. So yeah! Relaxing and doing the small things before overcommitting to a big piece is the best way to go about it for me.
Which 3 famous artists (dead or alive) would you invite to your dinner party?
I feel like these are all artists that I have second-degree connections with! Jillian Tamaki, Victo Ngai, and Tillie Walden would be my picks!
What are your file name conventions?
…What file name conventions? I mean, I don’t have specific file name conventions, but I actually have a public Google Drive archive! But I usually put “djjl_whatever-the-title-is_final,” and I would always know it’s the final and legit version.
What is a recent creative project that you are proud of?
I did an illustration for the whiskey brand Johnnie Walker. It’s so wild because I only had four days to finish it, and it usually takes me a week and a half if I rush. And honestly, it’s probably one of my best pieces from this year, which is funny. It was for the Mid-Autumn festival, so I made it as Korean as possible.
How has technology changed the way you approach your work?
I only use my iPad to draw everything now, and if I want to pretend that I have a steady workstation, I’ll use my Cintiq. I still am not as comfortable on the Cintiq as I am on Procreate, but it’s still pretty solid and nice. That’s the good part about technology. The bad part about technology is how AI art has been messing things up for me. I’m currently in a lawsuit about AI art as a class rep. Some of my stuff got turned into AI art late last year, so I have to give a deposition at some point.
What is a convention experience that has stuck with you?
Honestly, they’re all good! I feel like Lightbox Expo has been really nice because it’s truly been a convention for artists. I feel like that’s where most of my audience is, and they’re all around because their purpose is to be better at art. That’s where a lot of original artists do well because they’re getting art they’re inspired by, not so much fanart. I like the Lightbox Expo because it encompasses the pure love of art very well.
Top tips on setting up an Artist Alley booth?
Use a Y axis, not just your X axis! Take advantage of it! Branding is also something to think about. It is definitely something I’m getting better at. Having an assistant is also very important. I’ve also heard that 8.5x11 to 12x18 inches is usually a good size for prints, but I also provide postcard-sized prints because sometimes people don’t want to commit to a larger size.
Who on Tumblr inspires you and why?
You know this is so funny. I’ve been following @alicexz for over a decade on Tumblr and other platforms. I’ve followed her work since high school, and we’ve only recently become peers. I found her, and we met for the first time in real life, and she recognized me. And then I found all my drawings from when I was in my Alice phase, back in high school, and I was like, “Yo, this is when I was trying to be you so badly!” and she was cracking up and was like “Wow, this is so good!” It was such a sweet moment. I wanted to take a picture of her holding my drawing up. It’s really nice because now we’re peers.
Thank you so much for stopping by and sharing, Deb! Be sure to check out their Tumblr blog over at @jdebbiel.
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
cruelest summer ☀️
charlie baker x reader (enemies to lover)




summary of the cruelest summer;
☀️ the baker boys were forced to go to summer camp. charlie knew this tradition would continue, but he wasn’t the only one who didn’t want to go. he would have much preferred to stay in midland and and try to work things out with beth. yet tom insisted.
as soon as the baker boys arrived at the summer camp, chaos ensued. it was typical for the bakers' arrival, and charlie had to get things under control — though it was hard to focus with his old childhood crush working at the camp as a counselor. ☀️
"No—end of discussion," Tom said as he walked down the stairs of the big house where the Bakers were currently living. The family had slowly adjusted to their new surroundings in Chicago. It had been difficult for each of the Bakers, but somehow, they made it work.
Yet for Charlie, it was still hard being so far from Beth. They hadn’t broken up—not yet.
That’s what Charlie hoped, though Beth seemed to see things differently. It was difficult for both of them, not being able to see each other and share kisses on the lips and cheeks. Now they had to wait until every second weekend just to be together. For Beth, it was tough, but Charlie tried at every opportunity to be in Midland. He loved her dearly, but maybe that wasn’t enough.
“But Dad, I wanted to visit Beth. It doesn’t make sense to go to this stupid camp every year,” Charlie protested as he followed Tom.
“Charlie, I know you’re upset about it, but it’s a tradition. Your grandpa always took me to that camp every summer, and I loved it.”
“You stopped going to that camp when you were 15. I’m 17, and it doesn’t make any sense,” Charlie scoffed, rolling his eyes.
“Charlie, it’s not going to change my mind. Now go pack your stuff.” Tom entered the kitchen—or more accurately, the chaos.
“But why are Nigel and Kyle staying home?” Charlie wasn’t about to let that slide. He searched for any excuse not to go to the camp, but it seemed like he was constantly losing the battle.
“Your mother and I thought they’d go next year. They’re still too young for it.” Tom shrugged as he cleaned the mess on the kitchen counters.
“That’s okay? But I have to go? Come on, Dad—”
“Charlie.” Tom’s voice raised a little more than usual, and that’s when Charlie knew there was no changing his mind. Furious, Charlie shook his head and headed to his bedroom to pack.
If it were just one week, Charlie could have dealt with it. But three weeks? That was off-limits. It wasn’t that he hated summer camp—it was fun. When he thought back to previous summers, he remembered being one of the most mischievous kids there. He pulled pranks on the counselors, snuck out to the lake, played truth or dare with the girls, and made out in the tents until a counselor threw water inside. Most importantly, though, he always teased a girl who made his heart race—Y/N Y/L/N.
Y/N and Charlie were the definition of chaos. People said the Bakers were the perfect example of it, but they hadn’t seen Y/N and Charlie together.
Sometimes, Charlie teased Y/N so much that she once stuck a gooey marshmallow in his hair.
Another time, Charlie pushed Y/N into a bush full of bugs.
Then there was the night Y/N snuck into his cabin in the middle of the night and put makeup on his sleeping face.
Or the time when he was dared to kiss Y/N in the tent while she had her eyes closed.
Ever since that summer before high school, they hadn’t seen each other. For some reason, Y/N never returned to camp, and Charlie still thought about that kiss. Maybe it was the reason she never came back.
But she didn’t know it was Charlie—that’s what he told himself.
Henry knocked on Charlie's door and peeked his head inside. "Did you convince Dad?"
"Does it look like it? If I had, I'd already be gone—maybe even throwing a big party," Charlie chuckled, though disappointment tinged his voice.
"Man….I was hoping he’d change his mind this year. I mean, even I get bored," Henry sighed.
"I'm sorry, H, but let’s make the best of it." Charlie walked over and ruffled Henry’s hair affectionately.
☀️
The next day was pure chaos. Everyone was running around the house while Tom packed up all the boys' belongings.
"Jake, you can't take your skateboard with you. You know that," Tom said.
"It's me with the skateboard or nothing," Jake replied, raising both hands in protest. Tom sighed and placed the skateboard in the car.
Charlie adjusted his cap and took one last look at his message to Beth, who still hadn’t replied. She was upset that Charlie couldn’t make it to Midland, and she had every right to be. But at the very least, she could have texted "I love you" back.
Kate walked over to Charlie and patted him on the back. "Are you alright, Charlie?"
"Do I look alright?" he snapped, then sighed. "Sorry," he mumbled.
"I understand you're grumpy about it, but believe me, it’ll be fun! Maybe this time you can join the counselor group instead of pulling pranks on them," Kate suggested, looking at her son, who managed a small smile.
"Don’t worry, Jake has studied my pranks—I’m sure they’ll be fine."
"Please, do me a favor and keep them under control," Kate said, giving Charlie a concerned look. "...I promise."
"Okay, now let’s get to the car. We need to say goodbye to you guys!" Kate smiled.
The ride to camp wasn’t very long. Tom kept talking about his funny moments at camp to try and keep the boys excited, but they all wore the same uninterested expression—except for Mark, who was thrilled. He loved nature, especially the animals, and he was excited to reunite with his old friends who joined the summer camp every year. The thought of group activities in nature filled him with joy.
Charlie stared out the window, watching as the scenery blurred past. Everything looked the same. He had hoped there might be something different this time, but it was all exactly as he remembered—the same trees, the same signs, the same winding road to the camp.
By the time they arrived, it was 3 p.m. Tom had been chatting the whole time with Derek, the camp’s owner. They had met at the camp when they were younger, and now Derek was running the place.
The boys grabbed their bags from the car. The camp buzzed with energy as kids and counselors moved around, unloading luggage and searching for their assigned cabins. Mark eagerly rushed ahead, already spotting some of his friends. Jake and Henry dragged their bags behind them, looking less enthusiastic but still chatting about what they might do first.
Charlie, however, moved slowly, his bag slung over his shoulder. He wasn’t in a rush. As the others searched for their cabin assignments, Derek approached him with a smile. "Charlie! Good to see you again," Derek said, clapping him on the back. "I’ve got something special for you this year. You’ll be in your own room—kind of a reward for being one of the older kids now. You’ll have a bit of privacy."
Charlie forced a smile and nodded. "Yeah, thanks," he mumbled. Derek seemed proud of the gesture, but Charlie didn’t share his enthusiasm. His own room sounded like more isolation, not a reward. He glanced around at the other kids already settling into their shared cabins, laughing and joking with their friends.
It didn’t feel special to him—it just felt lonely.
"Derek, is there a possibility that Charlie could maybe work here as a counselor? Maybe organizing sports?" Tom asked with enthusiasm, catching Charlie's attention. Work with kids? Sure, he could handle his siblings, but spending the summer interacting with other kids wasn’t exactly on his bucket list.
"Dad—" Charlie began, but Derek cut him off.
"That's not a bad idea. Actually, I just got a call that one of our counselors couldn’t make it—he wanted to visit his boyfriend in Texas. You know how long-distance relationships go," Derek explained casually, while Charlie shot a pissed glance at Tom.
Derek clearly understood what the camp counselors needed. Why couldn’t Tom see that this wasn’t something Charlie wanted?
"If you’re up for it, Charlie, you could take that spot. It’s not too much work, and hey, you'd get paid $20 an hour," Derek added with a grin.
Charlie’s mood shifted slightly at the mention of money. Maybe that could save the summer after all. If he saved up, he could visit Beth sooner than planned.
"Alright, fine. I’ll do it," Charlie finally agreed, his voice lacking excitement but at least sounding resigned.
Tom’s face lit up with approval. "That’s the spirit, son! You’ll do great," he said, patting Charlie on the back. "Well, I better head out. Keep an eye on your brothers, and try to have some fun, alright?"
Charlie nodded and gave a quick goodbye to his dad, watching as Tom got back in the car and drove off. As soon as the car disappeared down the dirt road, Derek turned to him with a more relaxed smile.
"Glad you’re on board, Charlie. You know, the counselors this year are much younger—most of them are around your age, so I’m sure you’ll bond with them pretty easily. They’re a fun group," Derek said.
Charlie raised an eyebrow, unsure if that would really make a difference. He wasn’t here to make friends, but at least he wouldn’t be surrounded by people way older than him. Maybe, just maybe, the summer wouldn't be a total disaster after all.
"Yeah, we’ll see," Charlie muttered, grabbing his bag.
☀️
After settling into his cabin, Charlie tossed his bag onto the bed and took a deep breath. The room was basic but comfortable enough—just a bed, a small dresser, and a window that looked out onto the campgrounds.
Once he was done unpacking, Charlie decided to head out and explore his surroundings. The camp looked just as he remembered: the lake shimmering in the distance, canoes lined up by the dock, kids already running around, and counselors setting up activities. Nothing had changed, yet somehow, it felt different now that he was one of the staff.
As he wandered through the camp, he spotted a familiar sight—an art station, complete with easels and colorful paint splatters covering the ground. He hadn’t given much thought to it until he saw someone adjusting the easels. She was facing away from him, but something about her posture and the way her hair caught the breeze felt oddly familiar.
Then it clicked.
Y/N.
Y/N Y/L/N, the girl who used to challenge him at every turn, the one who teased him just as much as he teased her. The one he hadn't seen since that infamous summer before high school, when they shared that awkward but unforgettable kiss.
He was about to call out her name when she turned around. There she was, looking even better than he remembered. She had grown up in all the right ways—confident and sharp-eyed, with a smudge of blue paint on her cheek that made her look even more vibrant.
But when her eyes locked onto Charlie’s, her expression quickly shifted from neutral to something bordering on annoyance. It was as if all the memories of their past antics came flooding back.
"Well, if it isn’t Charlie Baker," Y/N said, folding her arms and raising an eyebrow. "Here I was hoping my summer would be free of your brand of chaos."
Charlie blinked, momentarily taken aback. "Y/N? You’re a counselor here? For—" He glanced at the easels. "Art?"
"Yeah. Not that you'd know anything about it," she shot back, wiping the paint off her cheek with the back of her hand. "What’s your excuse this time? Did they finally run out of people to put up with your pranks, so now you're stuck with running the sports program?"
Charlie smirked, trying to maintain his cool, though her teasing stung. "Nah, just filling in for someone. But wow, Y/N, you haven’t changed a bit. Still packing that same fiery attitude."
Y/N narrowed her eyes, though a reluctant smile tugged at her lips. "And you still have that same cocky grin. Must be exhausting to keep that up all these years."
Charlie chuckled, shaking his head. "I figured you might have mellowed out by now. Guess I was wrong."
"Disappointed?" she asked, arching a brow.
"Not really," Charlie admitted, though his eyes lingered on her a moment longer than he intended. If anything, he thought she looked better than ever, but he wasn’t about to let her know that. At least, not yet.
Y/N sighed dramatically, tossing a rag onto the art table. "Well, try not to make too much trouble this summer."
Charlie grinned. "Wouldn’t dream of it."
As Y/N turned back to the art table, Charlie couldn’t resist the urge to follow her. He sauntered over, hands in his pockets, and leaned casually against the table.
“So, Y/N,” Charlie began with a playful lilt, “where have you been hiding all these years? Haven’t seen you since that unforgettable summer before high school.”
Y/N didn’t look up from her work but let a sarcastic smile creep onto her face. “Oh, you know, just off having a blast and avoiding people like you. It’s been a full-time job.”
Charlie chuckled. “Avoiding me? Surely, I’m not that memorable.”
“Yeah, well, it’s amazing how quickly people forget the endless stream of pranks and trouble you caused,” Y/N shot back, her tone dripping with sarcasm. “I’ve been busy with school like every normal high schooler.”
As she turned to grab more supplies, Charlie noticed the array of vibrant paints on the table. An idea sparked, and he grabbed a pot of red paint. With a mischievous grin, he gave it a quick shake and, with a flick of his wrist, let a splash of red land right on her shoulder.
The children around the art table burst into laughter, their amusement evident. Y/N froze, her eyes widening as she glanced down at the paint splotch. Slowly, she turned to face Charlie, who was struggling to hold back his laughter.
“Seriously?” Y/N said, her voice a mix of irritation and exasperation.
Charlie’s grin widened. “Just thought I’d brighten up your day a bit. You know, you’re looking even more colorful now.”
Y/N’s eyes narrowed. “And you’re still as charming as ever. Must be exhausting trying to stay that annoying.”
“Ah, come on. You know you missed me,” Charlie said with a wink. “Can’t let you forget about me that easily.”
Y/N rolled her eyes but couldn’t suppress a reluctant smile. “I wish I could.”
Charlie laughed, feeling a rush of nostalgia mixed with excitement. As Y/N grabbed a rag to clean the paint off her shoulder, Charlie’s playful grin stayed in place. Maybe this summer would be more interesting than he’d thought, especially with Y/N around to keep him on his toes.
☀️
Later that afternoon, Charlie found himself in the middle of a lively soccer game with a group of energetic boys. He was reveling in the game, showing off his skills and thoroughly enjoying himself. The boys cheered, their laughter echoing across the field as Charlie deftly maneuvered the ball.
Meanwhile, Y/N and a group of girls watched from the sidelines. They exchanged sly glances and whispered among themselves. ,,Okay girls, like we planned it out alright?” ,,why are we doing this again Y/N?” one of the girls asked Y/N with a giggle.
,,Cause we are independent women and we are better than them” ,,What does independent mean-“ ,,Be quiet Maya” Another girl snapped at Maya.
With a smirk, Y/N decided it was the perfect time for some well-deserved payback. She quickly gathered some flour and a water balloon launcher, and the girls readied their arsenal.
As Charlie focused on scoring yet another goal, Y/N signaled the girls to launch their surprise. Flour-filled balloons soared through the air and exploded over the soccer field, coating Charlie and the boys in a cloud of white powder.
“What the—?” Charlie’s shout was muffled as flour covered his face. He blinked through the haze, spotting Y/N and the girls hiding behind a tree, barely containing their laughter.
“Oh, look at that,” Y/N called out, her tone dripping with sarcasm. “Charlie Baker, covered in flour. Who would’ve thought your soccer skills would include a new career as a walking pastry?”
Charlie, trying to wipe the flour from his eyes, shot her a playful glare. “Nice aim, Sweetheart. I see you’ve perfected the art of pastry warfare.”
The boys erupted into giggles, turning the prank into a full-blown flour fight. Charlie joined in, tossing flour back at the girls with a grin. “Guess you’re the reigning champion of the prank league now.”
Y/N smirked, hands on her hips as she surveyed the mess. “Just thought I’d give you a taste of your own medicine. You didn’t think I’d let you get away with that paint job, did you?”
Charlie laughed, shaking his head. “No, I guess I should’ve expected this. I’m impressed.”
Y/N rolled her eyes dramatically. “Well, it’s not like you’re the only one who can dish it out. But don’t get too comfortable. I’m just getting started.”
As the flour fight reached its peak, with kids running around covered in powder and laughter filling the air, a stern voice cut through the chaos.
“Alright, that’s enough!” Counselor Mark stormed onto the field, his face a mixture of frustration and disbelief.
Mark, known for his no-nonsense attitude, took in the scene of flour-covered kids and smirking counselors with a raised eyebrow. Charlie and Y/N, still covered in flour, stopped mid-throw and turned to face Mark.
Charlie, his face smeared with white powder, tried to suppress a grin, while Y/N wiped a bit of flour from her cheek and put on a sheepish expression.
“Seriously, guys?” Mark said, his tone sharp. “This is not what we’re here for. I get that it’s all in good fun, but look at this mess.”
Charlie shrugged, still trying to keep his playful demeanor. “It was just a bit of fun, Mark. We were trying to keep the kids entertained.”
Mark’s gaze shifted to Y/N, who raised an eyebrow in a mix of defiance and amusement. “And I’m sure Y/N was just doing her part to make sure everyone’s summer here is memorable, right?”
Y/N folded her arms and tried to look contrite, though her eyes betrayed her amusement. “Yeah, you could say that. I guess we got a bit carried away.”
Mark sighed, his frustration not entirely masking his grudging admiration for their creativity. “Well, carried away is an understatement. Next time, let’s keep the pranks out of the organized activities and focus on making the summer fun without turning it into a disaster zone.”
Charlie nodded, trying to look apologetic. “Got it. We’ll keep it in check. Just thought we’d add a little excitement.”
Mark’s expression softened slightly as he glanced around at the kids, who were now eagerly helping clean up the flour. “Alright. But remember, the real goal here is to be role models. Let’s show these kids how to have fun without making a mess.”
“Understood,” Y/N said, giving a small, rueful smile.
Mark nodded and turned to help with the cleanup, leaving Charlie and Y/N standing in the middle of the field, still covered in flour.
,,What a great role model you are” Charlie smirked.
,,Shut up, Baker.” Y/N shot him a glare.
☀️
☀️
☀️
helllooooo simps for tom welling! as the end of summer (its september so it means autumn season idgaf) I wanted to release this short one-shot with this hottie (:
if you are interested for a series or another part hmu ☀️
x nellie
#charlie baker#charlie baker x reader#cheaper by the dozen#tom welling#tom welling x reader#charlie baker tom welling#clark kent#summer fics#summer camp#tom welling cheaper by the dozen#cruel summer
354 notes
·
View notes
Text

jason grace dating headcanons ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
pairing jason grace x daughter of hera!reader warnings none i think this ones pretty much all fluff unless your uncomfortable with marriage and children lol an i have a whole yap on how i think children of hera are created here if u wanna check it out cause im quite proud of it ꈍ◡ꈍ , requested !!
alexa play so high school by taylor swift pretty pls ‹𝟹
my bad just had to set the mood before i talked about THE CUTEST COUPLE EVERRRRRR
jason dating a daughter of hera would just be so like cliche classic romance that everybody longs for
a timeless love if you will
youd think that your parents arguments and bickers would have some sort of effect on your relationship but you just dont care LMFAO
well i mean like your relationship with your mother is probably pretty good and stable (you know, for a relationship with a greek god) and i truly do think that hera would be caring torwards her demigod children cause those are her kids and they dont have a stinky man for a father
but your parents really dont have much of an effect on your lives because your relationship is something you developed and worked on together, and it has nothing to do with them
you first met jason when he crash landed on the shore of chb with piper and leo, but didnt really speak to him at first
but he DEFINITELY wished you did
cause the second the crowd swarmed him and he locked eyes with you, oh boy
SMITTEN
actually standing there with his mouth open
he wouldve spoken to you sooner if he didnt feel like his insides were being flipped at the mere thought of you
but you did end up speaking literally the day before he left for his quest
you had moved over to his table during dinner to wish him luck and find out a bit more about this quest
but you ended up taking for the entire night, hitting it off immediately and ending the night with him walking you to your cabin door with the excuse of "my legs are dragging me in the wrong direction!"
and when he returned from his quest, you were the first person he talked to about it
he literally went into full detail just so he'd have an excuse to talk to you longer (but left out the part where leo threatened to dump him into the ocean if he didn't shut up about you)
i feel like during your whole 'friends but you it doesn't feel like your actual friends and you can kinda tell you both want something more' era, jason is definitely making all the efforts to extend the conversation, spend more time with you, and to get to know you better while youre the one dropping more subtle hints that you want something more (which have him staring at his wall at 3 am questioning EVERYTHING)
i hate to drag things on longer than the should but guys... you dont get together until AFTER the quest of the 7 (well 8 cause surprise shawtay! you spent months on a boat fighting the tension between you and jason ‹𝟹) and even then it takes a few months full of you dropping heavy hints, the contemplation to make the first move, and countless amounts of teasing from your friends for him to FINALLY ask you if you'd let him be your boyfriend
thankfully from there, things just began to flow easily :)
you went on dates pretty often, but at some point you stopped considering them to be dates because you spend so much time together and its a bit difficult to come up with something original in a summer camp
but once you eventually move out of chb (jason moved camps to be with you) and into your apartments (not shared cause we need some space), you both made sure you were both coming up with unique ideas and planned dates frequently :)
jason ends up working a job in finance (trust fund, 6'5, blue eyes), while you did... well wtv u want queen !!
honestly life further on out is so peaceful and simple between you two, any issues you face you always work them out together
communication is so big between you two likeeee
not even only if you get into arguments and stuff, but just like in general
you talk about everything, know everything about each other, the yap sesh never ends between you guys ‹𝟹
you probably dont move in together until after youre married, which honestly bro ... biggest occasion ever
i cant lie and be like 'oh you just did something peaceful in a garden with friends ‹𝟹' nah yall went ALL OUT
youve been dreaming about your wedding since you were a kid (it comes with the parentage bro) and jason views giving you a big wedding as a way to really express your love for each other (and he gets to spoil u hehe)
he goes all out to propose too btw, like asks your closest friends from camp what your ideal proposal is and goes through with it
but yea after marriage? your life becomes practically perfect with the beginning of your family and live together forever nd ever ‹𝟹
not to say stuff gets boring like ur kids? some of the most random childrento ever walk the earth like theres always SOMETHING happening with them
and you and jason dont allow yourselves to go boring either, you stay communicating and working out different ways to showcase your affection for each other
you guys stay really close with your friends and always have them over for dinner and such ‹𝟹 (GUYS THE SEVEN ARE FOUND FAMILY IDGAFFFFF)
but yeah you continue to live in your happily ever after little fairy tale for ever n ever n ever ‹𝟹
#wowie this have been sitting in my drafts for a while#but shes finally been released !!#jason grace#jason grace x reader#jason grace x you#heroes of olympus#heroes of olympus x reader#percy jackson#percy jackson x reader#by bells ♡⋆ ࣪.#whos the cute boy with the wide blue eyes? ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅
161 notes
·
View notes
Text
This one's for all of my uni girlies that get fucked up by their exams studying sessions (it's me, I'm the girlies)
tw: none, slight touching and suggestive stuff just at the end, Simon is in his late 30s, reader's in her mid 20s
olderboyfriend!Simon, whose girlfriend is still in uni, getting her degree. Wether it's MA or PhD, you work as hard as you can. Of course you have a part time job, but you still come to classes, work on assignments and take exams at the end of each semester, focusing more on studying than anything else. And for Simon it's so adorable
He never thought of going to uni himself – his life was always military and that was it. Seeing how much effort it takes to get a passing grade still surprises him. And don't get me wrong – Simon is a smart, intelligent lad, of course he'd do well at university just like you do – it's just that he prefers physical, dirty work, not academic stuff
But seeing you so tired, with dark circles under your eyes, and messy hair – he understands that uni life is tough in its own way. Especially during the exams session, which you take very seriously
You're sitting at the kitchen table, a big ass mug full of coffee on your right, your laptop and several different notes on display as you do your best to memorise difficult terminology. It's late, really late, and you are so tired and overstimulated, but you keep trying. The oral exam is in two days and you know you can't fuck it up
He sneaked behind you and put some biscuits on the kitchen table. Something sweet to snack on was just the thing you needed, he knows you so well
And Simon, being your supportive, caring boyfriend, is so proud of you, seeing how hard you try to get that degree and have a fulfilling, successful career
'How you're doing, love?'
'Poorly, Simon, just poorly' you sigh and hide your face in your hands. There's no better answer than this one
'C'mon, can't be tha' bad, can it?' he coos, his big hands now on your shoulders to massage those sore muscles a bit
'You're right, it's not that bad, but I'm so tired...' you slightly lean back, letting him spoil you a bit 'I don't know how much longer this is going to take, but I'm gonna get that fucking perfect grade'
Simon just hums with content and gives you a kiss on the top of your head. You are so smart, studying so hard and doing so well for your own, better future. He admires how stubborn you can be - in the military there's no room for slacking either and he definitely can appreciate putting a lot of effort into a job well-done
He's kissing your hair again and again, slowly going down with every next one, placing them on your nape and shoulders, where the fabric of your jumper leaves the skin bare. His big hands sneak under your clothes, now his fingers massaging your breasts, toying with your nipples teasingly. You moan silently and reach behind to grab Simon by his short, blond hair. Your breath is getting faster and a bit more shallow, your pussy getting wet with his touch
'Atta girl, study for your school a bit more, yeah?'
'Unless you wanna take a break?'
#cod#call of duty#ghost cod#cod men#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x you#simon ghost riley#ghost x reader
153 notes
·
View notes
Note
Tbh I'm a jikooker, but I find it incredibly difficult to fit a healthy long-term relationship into the same timeline as all of jimin's solo work. It's not the pronouns or taking one lyric very literally, its the entire thing, plus comments from him and his producers. To me, you'd have to do some serious olympic level mental gymnastics to make that make sense. I don't doubt that jikook have a special bond, I've definitely seen things between them that definitely look like sexual attraction to me and things that surpass friendship boundaries, but I can't in good faith say that they're together in some official long-term way if I actually listen to jimin and his work.
I've seen some jikookers think they broke up for a while, but I have to question if those people have ever been through a breakup because the little bit of distance/separation/awkwardness we did see from them during chapter 2 is nothing compared to the type of tension that would be there if a relationship that intimate and intertwined had separated, especially considering the dark feelings jimin was feeling. He wouldn't have been cutely commenting on jungkook's lives and jungkook wouldn't have been asking to hang-out or getting excited to see jimin in his comments.
Idk, I'm sure someone could twist everything a certain way and only take certain things at face-value and then make everything else abstract, etc. to make the case that they are together, but I don't really see it. You look at face-off, alone, and just his general dark feelings during Face, then look at the creation of Muse and how him and his producers said he couldn't relate to the love-dovey beginning songs, which is how they ended up making Who (despite the fact that jikookers try to distance him from the song since he doesn't have writing credits even though he sat in the recording room telling them what he wanted and saying it felt like reading his diary). I think jimin could have very well gone through a pretty awful breakup along with the inner turmoil he was going through post-covid, but I don't think it was with jungkook if he did. I still enjoy jikook's bond either way at the end of the day, but yeah I don't really get how anyone can take an honest look at jimin's work and his words and think he was in a long-term healthy love-of-his-life relationship during that time or into chapter 2.
Not trying to change your opinion or anything, honestly I don't really see it discussed much in jikooker spaces (besides bad-faith stuff like tkkers stirring up shit over pronouns in lyrics which is just dumb) and when it is, some jikookers are pretty pick-and-choose about what they deem to be true to jimin's feelings and what isn't. Which I get being nuanced, but sometimes it does feel like a "well this fits my beliefs so clearly this is true to jimin and this doesn't so it means nothing because he didn't write it" or whatever. I honestly get annoyed with the bad-faith arguers because it prevents being able to have actual discussions about some of this stuff in our little jikooker corner of tumblr. Like "he said her, he's clearly straight! he danced with a girl, straight!" stfu.
I don't have much to say to you anon. Not really. Not anything that hasn't been said anyway. Which you've seen and decided its jkkrs doing mental gymnastics. "I'm a Jikooker but..." its never a great way to start a sentence. It just gives major insecure jkkr vibes which i just 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬 you either believe in them or you don't. There is no if, and or buts.
I will leave you with this; over the years, antis and (insecure) jkkrs alike have always found a way to conclude Jkk aren't as close anymore or they broke up or some other bullshit. But what happens everytime Jikook resurface and we see them together again?
NOTHING HAS CHANGED!!!
Nothing ever changes with these 2! They come back closer, more in sync, happier, more in love and their relationship more established than ever. This happens every👏🏽damn👏🏽time👏🏽 Everytime!


Then the insecure jkkrs will be like "jkk is real" again.
And then we will go without content for a while and once again we are back here with the jkk aren't as close argument. Once again. It is an exhausting cycle that I refuse to be a part of.
You can try and nit pick various reasons as to why Jikook aren't in an established rlship, but I will chose to focus on reasons why they are definitely 130000000% in a relationship. Like the fact that they are enlisted together rn, the fact that they could have done AYS with other members but chose eo. Or the fact that Jimin wrote his name on JK's chest with sunscreen and I dont even want to imagine how he did that. What position they were in that would justify people calling them brothers 😂
You do you anon. I'mma just be over here enjoying Jimin promote the hell out of his favourite JK song.
Tweet
Look at him so proud of his man 🥺🥺
#ask shaz#bts ask#jikook#kookmin#minkook#jimin and jungkook#insecure Jikookers#wishy washys#jimin#jungkook#are you sure jikook#jikook are you sure#standing next to you#jikook travel show#bts
271 notes
·
View notes
Text
Angel
Ghostface × Female!Reader
CW: Dub/Non-Con, Blood, Stalking, Breaking & Entering, usual fucked up GF stuff
Rating: 18+
Word Count: 2.2k
Summary: The quiet guy in your discord server decides to chat you up in the general vc, and as expected, has a lot more to unpack than you ever expected.
Notes: I was lazy and just posted the ugly default AO3 link when I first posted this, so I'm coming back and making it look nicer with new and improved tags lol
This piece doesn't specify who is really behind the mask, so whoever you want is up to you~
I had fun with this and left light references to the movies, Dead By Daylight, and Mortal Kombat to honor some of my favorite appearances of him-- hopefully it doesn't ruin the immersion lol
I don't usually leave notes, but it's been a while and I've adored all the comments and kudos I've gotten in my absence, cause at the end of the day, that's what will always bring me back. I love all your support and time reading this and hopefully I have more soon to come for you all!
Thank you again so much for reading, and I hope you enjoy! 🔪💕✨️
AO3 Link
This had become the nightly habit: get off work, make dinner, chill with the lads in a Discord call until bedtime. Mindlessly playing a game, you weren't surprised by the sound of someone joining the call, however you were surprised by who it was. He was a rando that had joined a while back, was nice enough, but didn't have much to say as he relegated himself to really only short replies or emoji reactions. You could have sworn he posted a thirst trap without his face in the #selfies channel, but you weren't 100% sure. When he would join calls he would always stay muted, opting to reply in the text chat or not at all, merely listening to and enjoying just being around the good times happening. All the same, you felt it rude to not say at least a little hello.
“Hey! How’re you doin’ tonight?”
“Hey there~”
The voice on the other side was low, having a bit of a flirtatious twang in the sigh of his greeting. Your heart skipped a beat, you weren't sure if he had ever spoken to you, much less anyone else in the server. And if you were being honest, he sounded kind of hot. Letting the giddy feeling ride, you tried to keep him talking since it was just the two of you.
“Woah–” You poked cheekily, “I dunno if I've heard you say anything before.”
“I'm more of a one-on-one kind of guy,” He offered smoothly, “But I enjoy listening to everyone having a good time.”
“Fair–”
The air fell dead as you wondered what to talk about next, letting him cut into the silence with a question, “So.. what's your favorite scary movie?”
Having just finished a server horror movie night not too long ago, the question felt like a natural segway into your interests, “Hmmnn that's actually a good question– I think if we're just talkin’ horror in general my first and favorite would have to be Silence Of The Lambs. The back and forth relationship between Clarice and Dr. Lecter was probably one of the most challenging to my mind at the ripe age of twelve, since then I've loved horror that has a female protagonist that is put under pressure by the killer to make difficult choices and solve the puzzle he left for her.
“But– that's not to say pieces like Substance or Midsommer aren't incredible mentally challenging works of art to me, I love both, along with movies like The Empty Man, Smile, It Follows, The VVitch, The Void, V/H/S–”
He cut your train with a light chuckle, “I definitely want to know which you thought was better, Smile or It Follows, but I meant to ask, what’s your favorite slasher movie?”
You gave this one a lot more consideration as your heart swelled with a damning excitement at the thought of your favorite killers, “That's such a hard choice! Of course Micheal Myers from <i>Halloween</i> is like everyone's big daddy– but I think if I had to choose it would have to be Stab! Ghostface is just a lot more fun, playful, and let's be honest– horny.”
“Oh yeah?” He hummed, “Why's that?”
How his tone seemed to curl at the end of his words made your chest tighten and a heat rise to your cheeks, “I mean, at the heart of it.. the voice actor responsible for his voice changer in the movie said that his tone is flirtatious, beyond that– between the fact that the first Ghostface seemed to get off on the idea of causing his object of obsession, Sidney, the most pain possible by the mocking of her mother being the town bicycle and it's even pointed to at the end of the movie that the two who were behind the Ghostface killings were the same two that brutalized Sidney's mother–”
“Goddamn–” Nearly groaning his words as he cut you off, he cleared his throat and pressed, “Good girl~ You sure do know your stuff.” Praising you with words that melted like chocolate over your tongue, your mind tilted at his words, ‘Good girl’.
Good girl?!
“Excu–”
“I fuckin’ love girls like you–” He went on, swearing you could hear the ache of him through the call, “Your type always knows how really appreciate us..”
‘Us’?
Before you could get a word in, he went on, “Buuut it looks like that's my cue– I hope you're ready for some fun this evening.” Leaving the conversation with the disconnect sound chiming through your ears in silence to process what just happened.
The sound of him leaving the call let a wash of relief run over you, only lasting for a moment as the floor creaking caught your attention with arms wrapping you in a winding embrace. Having your arms pinned at your sides, your hands flailed looking for any sort of way out. Only, the way your grip seemed to find his length caged behind his pants before skirting over to the long hunting knife strapped to his leg, making your struggle against him stop with a gasp.
“Yeah.. that's all for you Babe, whatever you need– so.. let's behave.. alright..?” The same voice that was lingering in your headset only moments ago was in high definition against your back.
Firmly pressing his hand over your mouth, you froze as someone else joined the empty call with you, “Hey you there?”
Your headphones loud enough for him to hear, an uneasy pause passed between you two as his hold over your lips lessened, “Yeah-” He let you breathe through his nitrile gloved fingers.
“Good, kinda glad he's gone, he's chill and all, but it kinda bugs me that he's just in here just dead-ass silent all the time. Fuckin’ weird.”
Looking over your shoulder a bit to get any sort of a look at him, you were only met with the deep black drooping eyes framed by a gasping bone white mask. Familiarity of the visage made your heart drop into your stomach, forcing you to chew on the harsh fact that that same familiarity you knew to fear, also brought the flutter of butterflies in with it.
A rough bump of his hips to your back-end snapped you out of your own mind and made you bark out, “Uh– Same– he is kinda weird, I've– talked to him a little bit and he just– seems like a bit of a creep..”
“Oooh shit whaddaya mean?”
He peered over your shoulder to look at you, curious to see how you would pull this along as his other hand pushed at the elastic of your pajama bottoms, “He uh– waited for everyone to leave– and then started hella chatting me up–”
“Are you good? It sounds like you're doing something.”
Eyeing him, the slight nod of his head coaxed you to keep talking while his fingers made their home in exploring your heat, “Yeah I'm fine– I think I pulled a muscle and I–”
“Oh shit– sorry, one sec– groceries are here, I'll be back in a minute!”
At the sound of her disconnection he lifted you up with a near effortless toss onto the bed, wasting no time crawling on top of you to get at what little clothing was left with his blade. Watching the fabric dance away from your frame, he gripped your wrist as you tried to switch your mic off.
“Go on.. stay in that call.. let ‘em all know what a stagy little whore you are.” He pushed, lifting the hem of his hoodie above the glimmer of the silver button hiding his length behind the black denim.
No time was wasted getting into you, making himself at home between your legs with a few rough thrusts and shivering grunts that made your mind twist. Squirming under him the grit falling off his boots into your blankets made you buck against him in frustration, earning a low sigh from him as his beat picked up.
“Mmn if you keep fighting me.. I'll gut you like a fucking pig.” Groaning into your ear, the delicate touch of his knife teased itself between your breasts.
Defiance sparked in you to bite back, “If we're– oh god– following the rules, you'll just do it anyway–”
The blade pulled its edge against your skin, splitting you like a ripe peach under its cut, “True.. but the killer's favorite little slut never dies.. she's gotta make it to the sequel, the trilogy, hell! Maybe a whole fuckin’ saga..”
Suddenly ringing in your ear the sound of the bluetooth assistant chimed,
Battery Low.. Please Charge Soon.
You held your lips tight as the length of him pushed to the hilt over and over, letting the air in the call stay dead as your friend and others passed through, thinking you were away from your keyboard.
“What’s wrong? Suddenly have nothing to say? I thought you liked the idea of being yanked around by a big man with a knife? Little different than on the big screen, ain't it Babe?”
You could practically hear him purring behind the mask, his pace slowing to deep grind as you felt the rub of his metal pants zipper dig into your skin like a threat.
“Mmmm– remember a couple weeks back– we were all watching that scary movie– when you wouldn't shut the fuck up about how you wanted to ride that slashers cock like a carnival ride– fuck you don't know what that did to me– hearing you get all giddy about bouncing on dick after a kill– goddamn you don't have a fuckin’ clue– how bad I wanted bust through that fuckin’ window and tear you apart–”
Gripping his palm across your eyes to pin your head to the bed, the unrelenting barrage of what came was less of a kiss and more of a hostile takeover of your senses. You couldn't tell how long you were left to his devices, using you with the excitement of a new sex doll he'd been waiting months for. The fight in you began to fade with the swipe of your tongue to his, earning the zeal of him rutting into you harder.
“See.. I knew you'd love it..”
Battery Low.. Please Charge Soon.
Dipping down to your chest to kiss the fresh wound that lay spilling blood around your breasts, taking in the heavy scent of your rubies like a jewel thief making his biggest heist. Slipping his free hand over your chest to the slick of your nipple made you gasp as a perfect distraction before pulling his mask back down. Adorning his usual visage now laid a smeared print of your life in blinding crimson, letting that be the first and only thing you saw as he let you have your vision back in the darkness. Against the blur of your eyes readjusting from the pressure of his weight on them, the dip of his frame dropping against yours with his hands gripping the sides of your head in a vice made you dizzy with a feral beat between your legs. Throughout his treatment you didn't feel that familiar latex rub of a barrier between you, forcing your stomach into a twist as his panting behind the mask got heavier.
The first grace of the evening came when you finally heard the powering down beeping of your headset giving its last bit of juice before cutting out. Unbound by the fear of being heard, your voice let out a moan that vibrated the silence of the dead air room. Relaxing a little under him, he pushed your rear up, angling himself better to pump deep before running his fingers over the tacky blood joining the fresh on your chest in a macabre mess. Having the dig of his fingertips into the open wound weeping from you was a new kind of violation before he breathed out a shaken manic pleasure from the mask that captivated you.
“Oh fuck– I'm going to smear your blood over my every fucking pore!” The bubbling frenzy in his tone gave away his devouring bliss as it promised to swallow you whole.
Honestly, you weren't long for the session either way as he found just the right spot to rub his tip into the soft warmth of you hugging his length and perfect grind of his mound against your bud aching to come undone. Seeing him watch you in those last moments before you went over the edge was enough to send you there as you trembled and cried out under his grip. Moaning and reaching to touch him in any way you could, you couldn't get enough of him as your body craved the closeness it needed. Expecting swift punishment for the affection, he surprised you by taking your hand in his, slowing his pace. Lacing your fingers as one, the gentle caress of his thumb to your skin had your rose colored glasses as red as they could be. Watching with a affectionately hazed gaze while he pinned you down, your skin when cold as his words dripped from his lips like sweet poison:
“You think you're getting away that easy? I'm just gonna cum and that be that? No.. I prepared for this all day. You're not goin’ fucking anywhere.”
#dead by daylight#dbd#dead by daylight fanfiction#dbd fanfiction#danny johnson#danny johnson x reader#danny johnson x you#danny johnson x y/n#danny jed johnson#danny jed johnson x reader#danny jed johnson x you#danny jed johnson x y/n#jed olsen#jed olsen x reader#jed olsen x you#jed olsen x y/n#ghostface#ghostface x reader#ghostface x you#ghostface x y/n#ghost face#ghost face x reader#ghost face x you#ghost face x y/n#billy loomis#billy loomis x reader#billy loomis x you#billy loomis x y/n#stu macher#stu macher x reader
198 notes
·
View notes
Note
Can you rank P1harmony on who is most likely to get pussy drunk and why 👀👀
who in p1harmony is most likely to be pussy drunk
pairings: ot6 p1harmony x reader
warnings: nsfw obvi (mdni)



a/n: well yes! this is in mtl, so most to least! (although i can see all of piwon as munches that all get pussy drunk tbh..)
༘⋆₊˚ jongseob
might be a controversial take and might be spurred on by a seob work i am currently drafting out but.. fuck it i’m putting jongseob as the most likely to be pussy drunk! i’m just sooo fixated on the idea of him never experiencing anything before meeting you, and just becoming obsessed when his fingers, lips, and cock all make contact with your cunt for the first time.. so eager to please, and the fact that he’s able to draw out waves from you is enough for him to feel pleasure as well. definitely a service dom that can spend hours analyzing each reaction he can pull from you.. when he’s particularly stressed out in the midst of comeback preparations he’s spending his nights lapping at your pussy until all the worrying thoughts dissipate from his pretty head :3
༘⋆₊˚ intak
just a loser puppy bf obsessed with his girlfriend and her glistening cunt :(( he’s sooo desperate 24/7, is always pulling you away from whatever or whoever you’re currently occupied with, just so he can worship you and your pussy. he’s the typa bf to rut his hips against the bed whilst eating you out, eagerness evident in the way he groans into your cunny .. he’s def begging you afterwards to let him stuff you with his dick .. pleading with big eyes and nasty words like “just the tip? please angel, wanna feel you around me” and you’d never admit it to him, but his never-satiated desire to worship your pretty pussy drives you absolutely crazy :( please please rut your hips onto his face and pull his hair when he’s eating you out.. he deserves it!!
༘⋆₊˚ jiung
another hot take but i think a serious little nerdy introvert like ji would have a crazyyyyy sex drive; and an even crazier need to constantly be inside of you. once the pair of you have sex for the first time, it literally alters jiung’s brain chemistry. he’s particularly obsessed with overstimulating you just to witness the familiar frothy white ring of his and your cum placed around his dick every time he lifts your pelvis up and pulls in and out.. literally takes pictures of your pussy like it’s the finest piece of art he’ll ever see, tucking said photos into a locked folder on his phone that he visits quite frequently. is not as vocal about just how pussy drunk he gets, but his actions and stares make it obvious :DD
༘⋆₊˚ theo
now now.. i know people are gonna say yangie should be higher on the list, but personally, i think theo—whilst very much obsessed with eating you out—would get more drunk off of receiving pillow princess treatment? i know most people write him as a service dom but this man is lowkey the brattiest sub to exist in my eyes lol. can see him being greedy as hell. being fourth on this list and leaning submissive doesn’t mean he’s never pussy drunk tho! but i do think it’s less of a trait during sex, and more of a feeling he gets when he’s needy and missing you. i can see taeyang sniffing your unwashed panties and getting off to that like a little perv hehe
༘⋆₊˚ soul
now this was a bit difficult.. and shota is an enigma so it took me awhile to properly place him where he belongs. kind of like theo, i feel like he isn’t really the type to get pussy drunk during sex or foreplay or anything like that. instead, i think he’s just more obsessed with your other body parts and processes, like the way your tits bounce when he’s rutting into your heat, how you clench around his cock when he’s more vocal with you, how your moans eventually morph into little broken gasps. i think my main impression of being pussy drunk is being so obsessed, dazed, and brainless, but i just think soul would be a lot more aware when intimate, and not so easily lost in the sauce as the others lol
༘⋆₊˚ keeho
i can already hear the disgruntled keeho truthers making their way but before yall kill me.. hear me out.. i think of kyo as a hard dom majority of the time, so i really don’t think he would make it aware to you even if he was pussy drunk. i also think making you feel good would be his priority, and he wouldn’t pay much mind to his own pleasure until his girl was satisfied, so i just don’t think he’s got the time and drive to be pussy drunk! he’s on a mission to have you trembling with want, and he can’t really achieve that if he’s drooling with lust for your cunt :/ maybe it’s just the way i characterize him.. but i just think he and shota are more focused on other things during intimacy
taglist: @woozixo @hearts4chanhee @kyokopi @astro-doll-the-star @soobiary @kyaaramello @t3ssamoodboard @angelcbf @idontknow-1s-world @vivienne-sim @elissasimp @imjustayapper @ihatewreckingballmains @sosaverse @seobing @www90kitsch @khfviq @barbiekh86t @bbyjjunie @taeyangi @fullsunstrawberry @jihnyah @intheemptymirror @watamotee33 @dreamer1299 @jixnnsie @wonootnoot @yukx-x047 @sundancearchives @chuuswifereal @seisyiss @fishsquishh @sunnyyangie
© kisseobie, please do not repost my writing!
༘⋆₊˚
#kpop writers#p1harmony x reader#p1h#p1harmony#p1harmony drabbles#piwon#jongseob x reader#jongseob#p1h jongseob#kim jongseob#p1harmony hard hours#hwang intak#haku shota#intak x reader#p1h smut#p1harmony smut#p1harmony scenarios#keeho smut#soul x reader#soul smut#jiung x reader#choi jiung#choi taeyang#theo x reader#theo smut#jiung smut#intak smut#yoon keeho#keeho x reader#p1harmony reactions
546 notes
·
View notes