#how to communicate your needs

[calltoamentor]

They say you can't choose your family, but you can choose your friends. It has been said that who you align with creates who you are and there's no getting around that. And while it is true that you may not resonate with everyone, you do have a say in who has direct participation in your life. Today let's talk about the construction of the ultimate adventuring party.

[batcavescolony]

Katniss is such an unreliable narrator. She says "Then something unexpected happens. At least, I don't expect it because I don't think of District 12 as a place that cares about me" girl you deliver strawberries to the Mayor, you hunt and trade for the district, when you fell at Prim being chosen someone caught you, when you went to Prim people parted for you, when you volunteered EVERYONE stopped. Idk how to tell you but I think you're a pillar of the community.

[madohomurat]

trans women are everywhere and are so eager to be seen and heard but only if they feel safe around you. if you hardly ever have trans women interacting with you, especially online, then consider there might be a reason for that and you should address it

[lastoneout]

the whole guilt-tripping language in posts about important topics paired with how I'm still getting bitches in my notes talking about why it's actually good to tell "bad" people to kill themselves continues to prove to me that a lot of people have absolutely no concept of social justice or activism outside of assuming the worst of and then viciously attacking strangers on the internet

[technically-human]

We're drawing the idiots with traditional clothing from our countries? hell yeah, here's stobotnik as Argentinian gauchos!

Plus a very normal and not at all unhinged rant about mate (the thing they're drinking) in the tags.

[littlefankingdom]

"Dick had to take care of Bruce and teach him emotion"

"Tim had to mentally support Bruce when he became Robin"

Shut the fuck up, they did not. They did not have to do shit. Bruce learned from raising Dick and having Dick around, Dick did not have to take care of Bruce or shit. He learned from Dick behaving lile a kid and having to deal with that, not from Dick taking his hand and teaching him. Tim literally only had to be there for Bruce to be better, it is explained in A Lonely Place of Dying that Bruce needs a child to take care of, and that's what Tim is, a child Bruce can take care of. They weren't parentified to take care of Bruce instead of him taking care of their emotional and mental wellbeing. HE TOOK CARE OF THEIR EMOTIONAL AND MENTAL WELLBEING. Damn, with Tim, he does it when his parents don't. With Dick, it's the whole point how Bruce took him to take care of his emotional and mental wellbeing because nobody did for Bruce, and Bruce succeeded.

Stop infantilizing autistic adults. Bruce being autistic and having difficulties with communication, emotions and relationships because of it doesn't mean his kids were the one taking care of him. It means his kids had to learn how it is to interact with an autistic or neurodivergent person.

Bruce being well only when he has a kid to take care of is what is difficult for the kids, because it makes the process of becoming an adult more difficult when your dad needs a kid.

I challenge y'all to be able to talk about Bruce being mentally ill without painting it as a burden to his family, because that's the only way you ever do it.

[bixels]

As cameras becomes more normalized (Sarah Bernhardt encouraging it, grifters on the rise, young artists using it), I wanna express how I will never turn to it because it fundamentally bores me to my core. There is no reason for me to want to use cameras because I will never want to give up my autonomy in creating art. I never want to become reliant on an inhuman object for expression, least of all if that object is created and controlled by manufacturing companies. I paint not because I want a painting but because I love the process of painting. So even in a future where everyone’s accepted it, I’m never gonna sway on this.

if i have to explain to you that using a camera to take a picture is not the same as using generative ai to generate an image then you are a fucking moron.

[bougiebutchbinch]

Intersectionality, disability, and being 'one of the good ones'

I am 'one of the good ones'.

I have been told this, verbatim, by various healthcare professionals.

This is because I have a severe manifestation of my disease - worse than 90% of what my specialist sees - but to their eyes, unlike most in the same bracket, I am driven to maintain as much mobility as possible.

I do the work I need to in order to remain able to work, even at a greatly reduced capacity (even if this constant effort towards condition management means making lots of sacrifices in my social and personal life). This makes me a 'good disabled person'.

This entire concept is fascinating to me - not least for the conflation of 'good' and 'has worth within a capitalist society'. It's also hugely damaging to other disabled people.

First off: I'm privileged in that one of my diseases at least, CAN have symptoms mitigated by medication, (ridiculous amounts of) physio, and surgery, even if it is still degenerative and the overall problem remains. A lot of folks have diseases that, whether due to the intractable processes involved, or medical neglect and lack of research, have no treatment whatsoever.

I'm privileged because I genuinely love my job. There are problems, don't get me wrong, but it's on its way to being a decent-paying, well-respected career that I can do from a wheelchair. People who work my job are typically treated well by society. There are strong protections in place to defend my rights as a disabled person, and though managers absolutely try to cut corners, those legal protections are still there. I find fulfilment in this work, to the point I would still do it in a perfect post-capitalist society without monetary gain. Although many people are ableist to me on a day-to-day basis, on the whole, people in this sector are somewhat educated about patient rights and disability advocation.

Why would I have any motivation to maintain my ability to work, if I was paid a poverty wage and treated like dirt for what I did for a living, on top of facing structural and interpersonal ableism?

I'm privileged because I have a loving family who help me with ADLs. While we still have our issues, they never make me feel 'lesser' for being disabled. While we used to be working class, we got very lucky and now live a comfortable middle class life, which means I have a stable home in a country with universal healthcare, that I am not in immediate danger of losing. We live together, so I receive care from them, and we get along excellently. They support me, and help me to achieve my goals.

How could I do the ridiculous amounts of extra physio and symptom management work I need to do if I didn't have people who were happy to help me cook, clean, and care for myself? How could I keep track of my medication and doctors appointments if I didn't have people who understand my memory problems and help me? How could I have the energy to work on controlling my condition - as much as it can be controlled - if I was constantly worrying about making rent or where my next meal was going to come from?

And finally, my mental health is in a genuinely good place! I do suffer from some long-term mental health problems, but they're managed and treatable, and I haven't had a severe episode in years.

How could I focus on looking after my body if my mind was constantly under attack from itself?

It's like... yeah, I've worked extremely hard to get where I am, and achieved rare results. I'm glad that's acknowledged by my healthcare team. But every day I am reminded that I would never have made it this far, had circumstances been different. That people across the world put in the exact same effort as me, and receive none of the results or the praise.

Caling me 'one of the good ones' isn't a compliment. It's a backhanded put-down to other, more vulnerable members of the disabled community. I think those of us who are classed as 'The Virtuous And Hardworking Disabled' do need to be conscientious of this. We should challenge this attitude where we can, even if we have diseases or manifestations that may be classed as 'more severe' than others.

[sesamestreep]

I really feel like one of the best details in “A Scandal in Bohemia” that I never see people fixate on enough is that the story starts with Watson stopping in to see Holmes at Baker Street on a complete whim, because he happens to see that he’s home (and Watson is now married and living elsewhere). Like he doesn’t send word first, he’s not invited, he just shows up and surprises Holmes. Which is not that weird but then Holmes is like “oh good, I’ve got a case anyway, you might as well hang out!” which just makes it funnier when the King shows up and is like “I’d really rather speak to you alone, actually” and Watson tries to leave and Holmes is just like “anything you can say to me, you can say to my best friend John Watson, and if you ask him to leave, I would consider it a grave insult, you would be my enemy and I will not help you ever!!” And the king is like “…ok” and just moves on.

like, that is crazy behavior. Holmes is talking about how there’s probably lots of money in this case, and then almost turns away the client for…not knowing who the fuck Watson is?? He’s not even supposed to be there?? He just came to say hi?? “It is both or none”… girl, GET UP.

[capydoodle]

have compassion for yourself and for others. it seems hopeless but any small amount of good you can do is just that much more love in the world

[theslimeologist]

this june lets celebrate bearded women. okay?

[chimerical-daydreams]

Art therapy.

I put Loop through too much already, they deserve a decent coping mechanism.

[studyblr-perhaps]

Unpopular opinion and honestly I'm just ranting but the studyblr tag has become quite disheartening. I have to scroll through 10-15 posts in the "top posts" column to reach original pictures, otherwise it is just aesthetic moodboards of pinterest reposted pictures. Which is fine, I have my opinions but I don't really mind those, plus they're good motivation sometimes.

My issue is that why do posts with original pictures not get as much attention? We should be able to see pinterest moodboards and original posts in equal amounts but alas.

[calltoamentor]

Releasing The Curse

What does it mean to leave your comfort zone? How does working from home help our mental health? Today, let's talk about how stepping away from the traditional workforce helped me reflect on where I want to go and how I want to move.

Daily writing promptWrite about a few of your favorite family traditions.View all responses Recently, the Universe is challenging me on my self-concept in regard to independence and what it means to accept my blessings. You see, I’d spent so much of my life fighting for every little thing I have–and I am very proud of that, honestly probably more than I should be. Poverty and trauma will do…

[000marie198]

Do you think Toothless ever grumbles and is sarcastic in his internal monologue and then goes: "Great. I must be exhausted I'm starting to sound like Hiccup."

Hiccup building a gadget in the forge two meters away: "Did you just make fun of me?"

Toothless grumbling about how it's a long time past midnight and they should be asleep, can't Hiccup tinker in the morning or something

Hiccup: "No one is forcing you to be here, Toothless."

Toothless howls at the other and glares. Hiccup glares back. They're having a glaring contest at two in the morning.

Moments later, Berk's heir is being dragged back to the hut by his sleeve by a dark creature that almost blends into the shadows save for annoyed vivid green eyes as the boy argues with the Unholy Offspring of Lightning and Death Itself in hushed grumbles.

..............

(Don't tag as a ship)

[queerofthedagger]

the thing is that if comments/kudos/engagement are "payment" for authors' "free" work, aka if fandom is transactional, then readers are in fact "paying" for something. and if readers are "paying" for something then fic is a product, and if you are "paying" for a "product" you are in fact - generally speaking - entitled to make some basic demands regarding said "product." what that looks like is gonna be different from reader to reader but we have spent years upon years arguing, rightly so, that people are not entitled to updates, or completed fics, or to offer unsolicited criticism, or fics going the way they want them to, or that authors shouldn't have the right to delete their stuff, etc etc. etc. and that entire argument crumbles the moment you turn this into a transaction and it's just no wonder (if no less goddamn obnoxious) that readers' entitlement is skyrocketing when they are treated like fucking customers. like. turning this into an us vs them seller vs customer thing is, aside from entirely ignorant of the fact that writers most often are readers themselves, the most horrific thing happening to fandom. stop turning this into a fucking free market under the guise of community. i swear to fucking god