#i dont learn from my mistakes 💕

[purpleleavesday]

BTW the coolest thing you can do as an artist is save your files. Frequently. Very cool and awesome of you to save periodically when you are working on art

[honeytonedhottie]

CONFIDENCE⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🛍️

i've reached a point where my confidence genuinely cannot be shaken by anything, like all the shadow work and everything is rly paying off and having confidence makes everything in life so much better so i wanna talk about it 🍭

GAINING CONFIDENCE = GAINING SELF LOVE ;

to begin with, confidence is not gained over night and its something thats built and honed with time. so be patient with yourself! confidence always stems from self love.

self love is the most important thing ever. no matter what u have to know that ur gonna love yourself thru THICK and THIN. ur the only one with u 24/7.

make ur mind a palace, treat ur body like a temple, give urself the tender love and care that u DESERVE 🧁💕

GET COMFY IN UR OWN SKIN ; 

i feel like the most confident people are dancers. i feel this way cuz of the way my own confidence SKYROCKETED after i started dancing. i feel like dancing gives u a sense of control over ur own body and its just amazing.

whenever i feel like i need a little boost of confidence or i wanna feel sexy and good in my own skin i DANCE. and i promise that it helps so so much. i dance around in my room all the time and it’s like therapy. 

embarrassment does NOT exist, stop making urself feel awkward or embarrassed for making mistakes sometimes, learn to laugh and not take everything so seriously.

MENTAL DIET ; 

honestly in my experience, manifesting has played a huge role in my self confidence and my self concept. honestly, self concept work goes hand in hand with self confidence work.

keeping a strict mental diet has made my self concept untouchable so definitely get into that. so SAY UR AFFIRMATIONS, dont EVER bully yourself etc.

SAY NO ; 

something about a confident person, they can ADVOCATE for themselves and they know how to say no/im not comfortable with _. practice saying no more and being in control of ur time.

some words that u can add to ur vocabulary to be more confident and advocate for urself properly is "absolutely not" or simply NO. theres so much power in the word NO so make sure to use it more.

THE MUSIC ; 

the music that u listen to on a regular day to day basis rly have an impact on ur mind for either better or for worse depending on what ur listening to. 

steer clear of music that talks about things like self loathing or self hate and instead go for songs that uplift you. a lot of the time when ppl bring up the relationship between the songs u listen to and ur mindset a misconception that ppl have is that like, u can’t listen to emotional or sad songs and that’s NOT TRUE. u can listen to sad songs and still be a confident, bad bitch.

HONEYS HOT TIPS ;

probably TMI but something that rly helps confidence is when u match ur bras to ur panties (IDEK WHAT IT IS) like the confidence boost is insane. when u look good -> you feel good.

again, embarrassment does NOT exist

no one is above you and no one is beneath you

surround urself with other confident individuals so that they can uplift u and u all can LEARN from each other, cuz the people u surround urself with matters.

[wonziz]

I always loved everything about you

pairings : niki x female reader

Genre: enemies to lovers, angst (?), a little bit of fluff

warnings : childhood trauma, overworking, anxiety, skinship, kissing (lmk if i missed anything!)

- NOT PROOFREAD-

this is for my girlies out there who are struggling with the same thing. Always remember, thing will get easier. Dont always preassure yourseld okay? You can do it!! Im counting on yahhh<3💕 this might be sensitive to something people so if you are not comfortable in reading it, you can always skip, take care💗

𝐿ibary…🖇️

~Currently playing: i bet on losing dogs by mitski~

You have always hated niki to the core. And he hated you too… so as you thought.

- more after cut! -

It was a week after the finals, which means, its the week you got your results back. You were nervous and scared, you always had a fear of failure trying to make everything perfect, trying to always impress your parents. You always overeducated yourself from a young age, pushing yourself more and more. You never did it for yourself but always the people around you.

It was biology, one of your strongest yet weakest subjects. It was your favourite subject but sometimes, you didn’t score as well as you wanted too. You sat in your chair anxiously, waiting for your name to be called out. you watched as your classmates faces filled with joy as they saw thier result slip.

you were called by your teacher, you walked up towards her and took you’re exam paper.

you walked back to your seat, looking at the slip in your shaky hands. An 82 again. You knew you could do better. You knew you could at least have scored a 90 or more. you stared at the piece of paper, regret filling you up. As you thought the feeling couldn’t get worser, your enemy walked up to you smirking, “what did you get huh? Why is it bad? Wow thats a firs-“

You stood up cutting niki off, walking out of the classroom. Niki looked at you shocked, following you from behind.

You knew he was following you but you were angry to even care. You walked out of the school building to a secluded area behind the school. You squat down crying, crumpling the paper in your hand.

Niki stopped in his tracks when he saw you crying not knowing what to do. He walked towards you slowly squatting beside you. “Whats wrong…? Im sure you got a good grade right? Can… i have a look?” He asked gently, putting his hand over yours, taking the crumpled piece of paper out if your hand.

He stared at it in shock, you got an 82. Thats good, really good. He looked at you confused, why were you upset with this marks. Niki puts an arm around your shoulder but you pushed it away, “go away niki. Stop trying to care when you dont. You hate me”

Niki looked at you with in disbelief, him hating you? He had always had a crush on you, but he always pushed thoses feelings away. He cared for you, but was too much of a loser to admit it. He didn’t know you thought of him like that. “Me..? Hating you…? Since when? Y/n, i have always liked you. Since ages. Grades does not prove your worth… its who you are. Your world doesn’t revolve some stupid numbers and studies all the time, its about knowing that you did our best. yes we need to study and get good grades but we need to live a little from time to time. Take breaks and rest.”

you halted up to look at him before crying again. Niki’s heart cracked seeing you so vulnerable and upset. Almost immediately niki hugs you “sshh… its fine, im here… let it all out.”

He stayed by your side, patting your back. You asked, “why do you even like me? Im not a good person, im not even pretty”

“I like every about you y/n. And i mean every single thing. Your laugh, your eyes, your smile, your voice, your determination. You are gorgeous. You really are, Its so okay to fail and make mistakes… we just need to learn from it.”

You look up again, with a small smile in your face. “Thank you niki… i-“ you got cut off when niki cupped your face in his plams then placings his lips onto yours.

“shhh… no need to say thank you..i promise to always be by your side. Always.” he mumbled againts your lips.

the kiss was filled with care and love, and that was all you needed to know

Nanas love note💕 : heyyy<33 Anyways this is probably my saddest work ever. I decided to write this as to express my own feelings, and to those out there who are struggling with the same thing, dont worry, you are not alone. I hope you like it<3 remember you are not alone and if you need someone to talk too… you can always slide in my dms<3 i promise it will be a safe place for you to vent or express your feeling okay? I love you guys sooo much💞

Taglist: @sugarikiz @icyy-hoon @jaysng @amorek1m

@jakesangel @mrjypark @won-k1ss @nxzz-skz

@yuvany @jiiyen (send ask or comment to be added🤍)

[bbrissonn]

its midnight, im bored, but ive been thinking about cute little posts trev would make on ur anniversary so yeah enjoy :))

trevor zegras x childhoodfriend!reader

trevorzegras

liked by yourusername, jackhughes and others

trevorzegras 6 years with you 🩵

seriously dont think you’ll ever understand how thankful i am to have you in my life, not only as my girlfriend, but as my best friend. you’ve taught me so much about myself and how to become the best version of myself possible.

ik i am not always the best boyfriend in the world, but you’ve always given me a chance to learn ans grow from my (very) stupid mistakes. over the last 2 decades ive had the honor to call you my best friend, and now i have the honor to call you my fiancé, and of being your future husband, a title i will proudly claim for the rest of my life.

thank you for doing life with me, i wouldnt want to do it with anyone else xx

oh and ill proudly where this nice necklace i found with ur name on it around my neck, not because you know me, but because you really know me 😚💕

p.s love you lots you twat :)

view all 10,849 comments

yourusername love you to the moon and to saturn 🪐

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lhughes_06 call it what you want 2:08

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yourusername @/jamie.drysdale 🤭🤭

_alexturcotte im sorry why is everyone just ignoring the fact THAT THEY’RE ENGAGED???

trevorzegras @/_alexturcotte when he knows how to read and actually pays attention 🤤🤤

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patrickmoynihan_ @/yourusername i knew 😃😃

_quinnhughes congrats !! ❤️

liked by trevorzegras & yourusername

load more…

[just-a-carrot]

hiii! ive lowk been *obsessed* with Our Wonderland since like, the begining of summer and OH MY GOD?! i unfortunately couldnt llisten to it with the music since i only had time to play it at like 2:00 am BUT the storytelling is fucking awesome, the fact that each character is some shade of morally gray instead of having a "super good ive never done anything bad ever" protag and a "haha im evil im never redeemable" antag we got to see like, a lot of complexity in the characters, and you really dont see that often. Especially with Iggy because even he did some pretty bad stuff (mostly in arc 3) and like it adds a sort of nuance to the game and i literally love it so much. uhm uh yeahhh thats basically it like i just really really like your storytelling it lowk had me questioning my morals and rethink some relationships ive had and like its such a good game like more people need to play it bcuz its so like complex and the narritave is so good and i just love it so muchhhjhhj!!!!

and thats not even talking about the art like holy shit? not only is ur artstyle like, AMAZING, but you were able to have a bunch of animated scenes and a shit ton of different character sprites and im like "wow" cause like thats honestly like really impressive. the thing that made me wanna play OW was the art cause i really like visual novels that have art in them.

sorry for going on that rant i just really like ur game its so good 😭

anywayssss my question is what inspired you to make OW or the OW characters?

wahhhh... this is really sweet... thank you so much... 😭💕 i'm really happy that you like the game and chars so much. lkdjafd i'm glad you say that tbh. it was definitely something i wanted to get across in the game... like... that there's no "wrong" and "right" or "bad" and "good" and that we all make mistakes and hurt people we care about. but it's less about the mistakes themselves and more in how you learn and get better and grow (and ofc talk and apologize, etc.), which is something the cast in general is not great at LOL i wanted all the chars to have deep flaws...

hmmm as for inspo, i've said before that the initial kernel of an idea came back when i was still in school and got really into horror vns, creepy vocaloid songs, games like american mcgee's alice, etc., and it just grew from there over many years of living with the idea and having it evolve. as for the chars themselves, that is something that i honestly could not tell you exactly where they each individually came from. like i had a general idea of the types of chars i wanted but as for their designs and such i mostly just sat down one day and drew them. and much of their characters grew and evolved both before and even during production. so there's no real single source for any of it lakjdfasd it was just a lot of various thinking, dreaming, and getting inspired by a variety of random little things over many years...

[chanbig]

🕯🍄🪐📚🔪🌸 (we require Fluffy!)

thank you anna!! 🩷

🕯️ ⇢ on a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy editing? why is that? 

6-7 maybe, with the caveat that i enjoy editing while i go, and am constantly editing a fic while im writing it, so by the time im "done" (i.e. finished writing all the scenes) i usually only have to make minor edits/adjustments. ive tried just writing the whole thing and then going back and editing, but i find keeping in the bits that arent working (and i know arent working) makes it difficult for me to write more, as i feel like the fic isnt flowing right and i get stuck. 

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

my headcanon is that big and chan are alive i feel like most of my headcanons are specific to the fic im writing at the time but i do like the idea of big and chan both being very light sleepers due to their jobs and therefore often dont sleep well, but together they sleep very well, just very comfortable 🩷 also that big is verrrryyyy sensitive to chan's touch so it never takes him that long when chan is the one stroking him 😏😳

🪐 ⇢ name three good things going on in your life right now

they are giving us a pizza party at work (not how they phrased it but...) which is possibly the cheapest party they could give us but!!! pizza 💕 that's nice. 

im learning how to fanbind my fics rn and its really fun so far!! i have a lot of idea about covers etc that im excited to try out

im holding the house in place on the second one, it's glued down now

uhhhhhhh third thing is it's my birthday next month!!! yay!!!!! 🎉🩷

📚 ⇢ what's the last thing you wrote down in your notes app? 

It's a rookie mistake, the kind of mistake Chan has warned against, again and again, with each new class of bodyguard recruits. He's said it thousands of times by now, the words familiar as his breath--

Never attempt a rescue alone. 

Never in the dark, in unfamiliar terrain, with possible enemies still at large. Never unprepared, rushing, heartbeat thundering, the memory of the familiar form on a motorcycle veering off into the trees sharper than the shaky outline of the underbrush in the lone beam of his flashlight.

Not even if he sees Big, there, close, a tangle of limbs in the dark, helmet flashing under the light, body so still--

🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

i cant think of anything truly that weird, like ive done research into a lot of injuries before (stabbing, shooting, detached retina, etc) but that seems pretty normal to me. maybe the weirdest/most intense way ive done research is im writing a story about a college soccer player, and i was watching all of the ncaa games online and reading all these soccer blogs and watching vlogs by random d1 soccer players about their days/training/games/travelling, with so many of the videos having like 100 views and being from like. 2009 😂 and i think most of those people have forgotten they put up those videos. and eventually i was like i need to go to an actual game in person so i got tickets for me and my family to go see a game and we all loved it so much that we've had season tickets for a couple of years now and went to see the womens world cup and we're all obsessed so 👍 all because of a story 😂

🌸 ⇢ do you have any pets? if you do, post some pictures of them

fluffy!!!!!! my baby boy old man 💕💕💕💕

writers truth or dare ask game!

[the-kipsabian]

🕯️🛼 🧃🦷 <3

🕯️ ⇢ on a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy editing? why is that?

mmm probably like. 3. not a big fan, i dont like looking at my mistakes lmao. bonus points tho cause if i edit, it means a fic i wrote is good enough for me to put effort into it and reading it again with focus lmao

🛼 ⇢ describe your latest wip with five emojis

🛠🦾🔫🥼💕 (more of a general vibe of the au as im not actively writing for it yet)

🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before

oh. hmm. i dont really know if there is anything i havent mentioned even once before? im pretty transparent about things idk feel free to ask something tho i guess

🦷 ⇢ share some personal wisdom or a life hack you swear on

time doesnt heal, it changes you. i know i say it a lot but i genuinely do believe it. its always said that time heals all wounds but thats not true; and what doesnt heal, we can learn to work with and work around and find strength in that and come out the other side as new, better people 💜

[youremyheaven]

Haha I was a little hesitant about telling my age because I've shared about my not so innocent experiences before and you know at that time (as in when those “experiences” were happening) I wasn't actually aware how wrong it was (that guy was a full grown adult btw... Literally 8 years older than me) but then I realised that our shawty here actually experienced statuary rape (definitely not something that I would've ever let happen to younger me) but it's all in the past now and I've learned from my mistakes and I was like fuck it itna load nhi lena mereko... waise to I'm turning 18 soon (early 2025🤞)

I was SO clueless cause mere 10th standard mein we didn't get a proper farewell (jhaatu school wale) and this time i wanted to dress properly and i didn't have anyone I could go to for advice other than you, our beloved didi (lots of love to you meri jaan 💕💕)

But yeah I'm gonna go for a sweetheart neckline and let's see how deep my mom will let that neckline go 🤪 you're a lifesaver 🥹🥹🥹

as someone who had.... things happen to them... when they were a minor, i gotchu

honestly there was a period in my life where i completely kinda let my past define me etc etc but i finally feel like im in a place in my life where i have enough going on in my life and im completely occupied so i dont get to even think about myself too much and its soo freeing in many ways

my greatest wish for anyone with any kind of trauma is MOMENTUM so that u dont stay stuck in the same cycle 4eva

i wish u soooo much healing and love, my angel <33

even i didnt have a 10th grade farewell and i feel like a LOT of schools dont have it bc today is the first time im even hearing about it 😭😭😭im also an older gen z so mere zamaane mein toh ye sab nahi tha </3

hehehe its sooo cute to me that ur going thru all these major milestone moments in life. I HOPE U HAVE THE BEST FAREWELL (to my non-desis, this is like our prom, so its kind of a big deal for us) and I hope tailor bhaiya stitches u a mindblowing blouse 🤪🤪

[ittybxttykxttytxtty]

oh boyo, based on the comments i've seen...i am nervous 😄

Eventually he’d finally decided that he would seek your forgiveness for how awful he’d treated you, wanting to prove just how serious he was about being there for the both of you. And he was not going to give up until he’d somehow managed it. Until he proved himself to you.

MY BOY IS LEARNING. HE IS LEARNING. I LOVE HOW THIS IS THE INTRO. YES, IM IGNORING THE GRUMPY BROODING MOOD HE IS IN. WHAT MATTERS MOST IS HE KNOWS HE DONE FUCKED UP 😭😭😭 I AM SO PROUD.

But yet somehow as he stepped into the office and heard both Karen and Foggy working at their desks, he couldn’t stop that bit of bitter anger that suddenly burned white hot in his stomach.

okay, i was wrong. he's back on his bullshit again

And yet neither of them had said a thing.

because they have their priorities straight, matthew. we all cant be irresponsible like you. 🙄

This wasn't on Foggy or Karen, he reminded himself.

okay, thats an improvement. this is good. keep that in mind.

Of course he knew they had a point, he wasn’t that much of an asshole, but that didn’t stop him from being angry that he’d been walking around this office entirely oblivious while both of them knew what was really going on.

oh no! its the consequences of his own actions! 😮 i wonder why they knew and you didnt. i wonder why it took so long. really, i do. sarcasm

“I mean,” Karen began cautiously, “can you blame her?”

a queen is about to start spitting facts 😌✨ go ahead, baby. i'll hold your earrings for you 😌✨

IM NOT GONNA PUT WHAT KAREN SAID HERE BECAUSE ITS LIKE BEATING A DEAD HORSE, I HAVE NOTHING TO ADD. SHE SAID WHAT I'VE BEEN THINKING SINCE DAY ONE. WHAT SHE SAID IS FACTS, TRUTHS, AND GOSPEL. SO, INSTEAD HERE'S MY FAVE PICTURE(s) OF MS. KAREN PAGE.

i had to do it to em, bois #kastle 5ever

“I would never . And I will do everything in my power to get her to understand that.”

thats a start, das good. please keep moving forward. i want the three of you to be happy 🥺💕 i want lil devil to have a mama and a papa that loves them very much (imagine if it turned out to be twins or smt tho 😂...unless 👀)

"Cause I think you've got some work to do, buddy."

the weather and the truth, coming to you live from Foggy Nelson 😌✨

But after the past couple of nights, stopping by your apartment was all he ever seemed compelled to do.

thats right, buddy. time to go learn and yearn 😌

He'd listened to that fluttering heartbeat for quite a long while, having to eventually tear himself away from it only when he overheard someone screaming for help in the city.

this is nyc, it'll be fine. if they die, just press f to pay respect 💀

Too little, too late , the bitter words of the Devil reminded him.

omg, wtf is wrong with you. dont you dare call Jojo the devil

It was almost too much for Matt to bear.

okay okay oh no, its hurting again. 😭😭😭

Because of his own mistakes, his inability to prioritize the different parts of his lives. Because he should have just listened to you when you’d asked him to stay.

i mean, its the truth. it hurts but im having fun reading matt's self made problems...i think 🥲

im not, it hurts to see him cry...i cant

He honestly didn’t think he could handle hearing you tell him yet again that he wasn’t wanted. That he had nothing to offer. That there was nothing here for him.

omfg, no. dont put words into my mouth put something else in it. wtf. no. oh no oh no oh no 😭😭😭 YOU ARE WANTED. YOU ARE LOVED. ITS YOU WHO CANT SEE THAT. WE'RE ALL JUST WAITING. PLEASE.

It wasn’t until he heard a few droplets land on the roof beside his fist that he realized he’d been crying.

omg omg omg, bella i cannot cry i already did my night time routine. castar oil and everything. omg.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,”

agsgsgsh 😭😭😭😭 bella...

“I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. Talked to you like that. And I–I certainly shouldn’t have left you when you’d needed me.”

beLLAaaaa 😭😭😭😭

“I should’ve been better. You deserved better. But I’ll fix it. I swear to you, I will fix it.”

BELLLLLLLLLLLAAAA 😭😭😭😭😭

“Hopefully you get your father’s intelligence,” you continued on. “He’s a smart man, even if he’s stubborn and makes absolutely terrible decisions sometimes.”

To be welcomed back into your life, even just a little bit, so that he could prove himself.

you'll prove yourself, matthew. you're an idiot but your our no. 1 idiot...with a heart. 😭😭💕 i believe in you.

A blue plush narwhal with a gold horn sat smiling back at you. One that hadn’t been there earlier.

agfsfsggsg, HE BOUGHT A NARWHAL PLUSHIE. IDFC, HOW. i actually do care, please include how he bought one in the next chapter. id give you a nickel, a napkin, and a chip

Matt must have been nearby, eavesdropping on the conversation you were having.

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

It may not have been a grand gesture, but it was a gesture that clearly meant something. But what exactly still remained to be seen.

he'll redeem himself, you'll see 🥺 i might bully matthew all the time when commenting but i do love him and ik that he'll make this right. 🥺 i believe in him 🥺💕 this is the only time i'll say this tho, i have a reputation to uphold. 😭😭

After thots:

- will never read this after doing my night time routine. i learned my lesson, i thought i was strong. i wasnt.

- matt is learning, very slowly...but its progress and i am proud. ik its too early to say that all is beginning to heal, so i'll celebrate in the final chapter instead. 🥲

- karen and nelson is still working overtime, please pay them their dues. name the child and future children after them, please and thank you 💕

- istg, the rooftop scene just about killed me. i couldnt. straight up wanted to record myself screaming and post it here instead of my comments

- the whole chapter is a healing fic after the fight from the last chapter....and i love that for us all 🥹

i can now sleep, peacefully 🥲 thank you for the bedtime story 💕

Seeking Forgiveness [Part Six]

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader Word Count: 3.5k

[Full summary and installment list for this series can be found here.]

Warnings/tags: 18+ contains angst, emotional hurt, delayed comfort, pregnant Reader

a/n: Another angsty and sad installment, but hey there's finally an update for this fic! There's also some POV switches in this one but it should be obvious. Feedback is always appreciated!

Matt hadn’t meant to show up at the office in such a foul mood that Friday morning. That wasn’t his intention. He’d gone through a multitude of emotions last night, barely getting any sleep after he’d stopped by your apartment and found out that you were pregnant. Eventually he’d finally decided that he would seek your forgiveness for how awful he’d treated you, wanting to prove just how serious he was about being there for the both of you. And he was not going to give up until he’d somehow managed it. Until he proved himself to you. With a focused calm after that silent vow, he’d put back his apartment after the destructive mess he’d made of it in his self-loathing fury.

But yet somehow as he stepped into the office and heard both Karen and Foggy working at their desks, he couldn’t stop that bit of bitter anger that suddenly burned white hot in his stomach. Because they both had to have known that you were pregnant this whole time. He knew Karen had been spending time with you, and he figured Foggy’s rage at him back on Monday morning had to have been due to him finding out the truth, too. And yet neither of them had said a thing.

Feeling irrationally angry, Matt slammed the door harshly behind himself before roughly storming his way to his office. He heard the way both Foggy and Karen had glanced up from their desks at his loud entrance, probably exchanging a look with each other about his bad mood. 

Dropping his briefcase onto his desk in his frustration, Matt folded up his cane before he also slammed that onto his desk. Closing his eyes, he blew out a rough breath, his hands aggravatedly readjusting his tie.

This wasn't on Foggy or Karen, he reminded himself. This was between the two of you. What had happened was due to his actions. You were allowed to be friends with them still, allowed to have confided in them. Even if it hurt him to be the last to know.

But as much as Matt tried hard to calm himself down and not lash out, ultimately his anger won out.

Swiftly turning on his heel, Matt stormed back out of his office, his teeth grinding together. Hands rising to roughly grip his hips, he couldn’t fight the near growl in his voice when he spoke.

“Both of you knew, didn’t you?” he called out into the office. “That she was pregnant? With my child?”

He heard Foggy sigh, gradually sliding his chair back and making his way around his desk before exiting his office. Karen hesitated for a moment, running her fingers through her hair before she slowly rose from her desk, too. Both of them entered the main room of the office a moment later, focusing on Matt.

“So you finally spoke with her?” Foggy asked.

“Yeah,” Matt snapped. “I did. Turns out she’s pregnant. But you both knew that, didn’t you? Before I even did?”

“Yes,” Karen replied. “Wasn’t exactly my place to tell you that, though.”

“She was planning to tell you herself, Matt,” Foggy added. “That was her place to do so, not ours. I know you know that.”

Matt’s lips thinned out in irritation. Of course he knew they had a point, he wasn’t that much of an asshole, but that didn’t stop him from being angry that he’d been walking around this office entirely oblivious while both of them knew what was really going on. While both of them knew he was going to be a father.

“I…take it the talk didn’t go so well?” Foggy asked carefully.

Matt’s eyes narrowed back at him behind his lenses. “No, Fog, it didn’t,” he answered. “She told me to leave. Told me she was raising our child by herself, even after I practically begged her to let me be a part of things with her.”

“I mean,” Karen began cautiously, “can you blame her?”

Matt’s head darted in the direction of Karen’s voice. He heard the way she crossed her arms over her chest and leant up against the doorframe of her office. His eyes narrowed even further at her words.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked sharply.

“It means that you’ve been throwing yourself out there as Daredevil for so long now, Matt,” Karen explained. “You don’t even think about the consequences of it anymore. You were supposed to be in a committed relationship with her. And things had been going well between you both, but in the entirety of your relationship, nothing crazy had been happening in Hell’s Kitchen until just recently. And then you prioritized that over her,” Karen continued. “So can you blame her for not wanting you around for this? For not wanting the added stress of wondering if you’re actually going to show up for her when you say you will? For not wanting to wonder if she even matters to you? If you’re even going to be any help to her when she needs it?”

“Well, I–”

“Because you have absolutely no idea what she’s been going through for the past few weeks,” Karen barreled over Matt. “The fear and the loneliness she’s been feeling. Struggling with uncomfortable pregnancy symptoms while trying to take care of herself all on her own. She’s been in this alone for weeks now, Matt. Because you couldn’t have just put her first for a single damn minute and listen to her the other week when she begged you .” 

Matt stood there dumbfounded when Karen finally finished, his mouth falling open as his hands dropped from his hips, coming to hang loosely at his sides. In all his anger at himself since finding out that you were pregnant last night, he admittedly hadn’t thought too much about what you’d been going through alone. Sure, he figured you were scared, he’d certainly thought about that last night–cried over it repeatedly–but he hadn’t thought about what you must be feeling from pregnancy on top of all of that. The memory of you having been sick last night surfaced in his mind and guilt burned through him, dissipating the anger within him immediately.

“She thinks you wouldn’t want to be a father,” Foggy added softly. “That you’d care more about the city and Daredevil than raising a child.”

Matt shook his head firmly, a pain hitting him hard in the chest at Foggy’s words. You’d said that to him last night, too, but it still hurt to hear.

“That’s not true,” he breathed out, still shaking his head. “Nothing could ever be more important to me than my own family. Nothing . Especially because I never–” the words caught in his throat, his eyes closing sharply, “–I never really had one. And I wouldn’t–wouldn’t do the same to my own child. Wouldn’t have them growing up feeling like I ever abandoned them. Because I wouldn’t ,” he nearly snarled out. “I would never . And I will do everything in my power to get her to understand that.”

"I believe you," Foggy said.

The words caught Matt off guard, his head tilting to the side as he heard the truth in Foggy’s heartbeat. 

"I know you, man," Foggy continued. "I know how difficult it was for you not having your family once your dad passed. We talked about it often at Columbia. So I believe you."

Matt felt his throat closing up with emotion at his friend’s words. Tears were brimming in his eyes behind his glasses and he blinked them back, not wanting to cry in front of Foggy and Karen.

"For what it's worth, I do, too," Karen added gently. "And we have both told her that. But honestly? You do have some changes to make, Matt. You need to learn balance if you're ever going to make things work. Because it's not Foggy and I that you need to convince."

"You're right," Matt readily agreed, fighting to keep his voice steady. "You're right, I do. And I will prove to her that she can depend on me. That I want to be in this with her."

"Good," Foggy firmly replied. "Cause I think you've got some work to do, buddy."

Matt kneeled down on the roof of your building, hunching over and turning an ear towards your apartment below so he could listen in better. He'd passed by here earlier when he'd first gone out tonight as Daredevil, which was something he had been avoiding ever since the breakup. He hadn't wanted to catch so much as a single beat of your heart, afraid the sound alone would shatter him to pieces, only reminding himself how much he missed you. But after the past couple of nights, stopping by your apartment was all he ever seemed compelled to do. 

Earlier when he stopped by you'd been curled up on your couch, quietly watching some of those shows he knew you liked. He'd noticed you were tired, close to drifting out of consciousness as you lay there focused on the television. He could hear the exhaustion in your body and the countless times you'd yawned. He'd been itching to hop down onto your fire escape and slip through the window as he listened, desperate to peel off his suit and hold you on the couch like he used to. To let you drift to sleep in his arms while he buried his nose into your hair, breathing in the scent of you.

He'd focused on the baby, too. He'd listened to that fluttering heartbeat for quite a long while, having to eventually tear himself away from it only when he overheard someone screaming for help in the city. He hadn't wanted to go, deluding himself into feeling like he was there with you both if he focused hard enough. But ultimately you both were safe inside that apartment and somewhere in the city someone else needed his help.

But he'd come back one last time before he planned to head home for the night and try to sleep because he'd heard you up and about in your apartment. He knew it was early in the morning and he'd been curious, wondering if you were alright. Because you should have been asleep at this point. 

So he had settled on the roof, and now he heard you rummaging around your kitchen. A loud rumble of hunger from your stomach met his ears and he understood immediately why you were awake–you were hungry. Making something to eat in the middle of the night. 

His shoulders sagged as he placed a gloved hand to the floor of the roof as if that would somehow bring him closer to you. He'd have made you anything you asked. Would have ordered you whatever you wanted, any time of the night. 

He'd have done anything for you. 

Too little, too late , the bitter words of the Devil reminded him. 

"Yeah, I know, I'm going as fast as I can," he heard you say. "Don't forget you're the one who woke me from a dead sleep at two in the morning wanting a grilled cheese. So you'll just need to be patient cause I am not awake, and that weird hunger-nausea is not helping.”

A smile slowly pulled Matt’s lips upwards under the mask as he listened in. You were talking to the baby, your tone a mix of tired, affectionate, and frustrated. He wondered how often you did that. This was the first time he’d stopped by and overheard you.

"Would be a lot easier if you craved things like an apple," you continued, heating the pan. "You know how much work it takes to prep an apple? None, my little devil."

Matt's hand curled into a fist at those three words you'd spoken so lovingly from your lips. My little devil . You used to call him that when he'd make his way back to you at night, running your fingers so delicately across cheek, just beneath his mask, as you inspected him for injuries. 

Now you were calling the baby that? It was almost too much for Matt to bear. Sitting on the roof, bent in half over his knees, he became very aware of how much he wasn't quite a part of any of this with you. How separate he felt from you and his own child growing within you. Because of his own mistakes, his inability to prioritize the different parts of his lives. Because he should have just listened to you when you’d asked him to stay.

The burn of tears unexpectedly hit him fast and hard, his heart thumping heavily in his chest. What he wouldn’t give to slip through your window right now and pull you into a kiss, to wrap you in his arms and just hold you. He’d love nothing more than to settle you on the couch and make you the best damn grilled cheese you’d ever had. Afterwards, he'd happily clean up the kitchen and take you back to your bed, curling himself around you and falling asleep. You'd always fit so perfectly in his arms.

But you’d probably have yelled at him if he tried to step foot into your apartment again to help. He honestly didn’t think he could handle hearing you tell him yet again that he wasn’t wanted. That he had nothing to offer. That there was nothing here for him. Because that part wasn’t remotely true–you and that unborn child meant more to him than you clearly knew. 

“I don’t understand how this smells like the best thing in the world right now,” you said to your belly, Matt’s ears picking up on the way you were rubbing a hand across it. “Yet coffee makes me want to throw up. I have never been a grilled cheese person. Your dad can attest to that.”

It wasn’t until he heard a few droplets land on the roof beside his fist that he realized he’d been crying. His tears had somehow managed to slide out beneath his mask as he’d been listening in to you making your late night snack. His throat had felt like it was closing up the second you’d mentioned him. And the emotions that stirred awake inside of him when you’d referred to him as dad were strong and foreign to him. 

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” he croaked out between his tears. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. Talked to you like that. And I–I certainly shouldn’t have left you when you’d needed me.” He slammed his fist against the roof, grimacing at the force as his knuckles stung beneath his gloves. “I should’ve been better. You deserved better. But I’ll fix it. I swear to you, I will fix it.”

“Wonder who you’ll take after more,” you mused softly, entirely oblivious to Matt sitting on the roof of your apartment building listening in. “Me or your dad.”

Raising a gloved hand to his mouth, a muffled sob slipped out of Matt and into it. As much as hearing this was further twisting his heart in his chest, he couldn’t tear himself away. He couldn’t stop listening, wishing he could be part of the conversation with you.

“Hopefully you get your father’s intelligence,” you continued on. “He’s a smart man, even if he’s stubborn and makes absolutely terrible decisions sometimes.”

A humorless laugh fell out of Matt next, still muffled against the palm of his glove. More wet tears trailed down his cheeks, the brisk night air biting unforgivingly against his damp skin. You weren’t wrong on that.

“I wonder what your favorite animal will be, too,” you said, turning off the stovetop. “Dogs? Cats? Koala bears?”

He heard you hum in thought as you plated your grilled cheese, walking your way over to the small table in your kitchen. The same table he’d sat at with you for many dinners, flirting with you over a meal he’d helped you cook or one you’d both ordered out. The same table you both eventually crawled out of bed in the mornings together to have coffee at, with Matt often pulling you down to cuddle in his lap while he slowly woke up.

“Or will you like narwhals maybe?” you murmured, breaking through the memories playing through his mind. "What do you think, my little devil?"

Matt forced himself to stop listening in to that one-sided conversation when he heard you take a bite of your food, shaking his head roughly as he rose to his feet. His heart ached far too much, the tears continuing to drip down his chin and land on the cement roof with an echoing plop each time. He wiped the sleeve of his suit across his face below the mask, trying to dry the tears even though they still kept coming.

He didn’t think he could sit up on your rooftop any longer. It wasn’t the same as actually being there with you. Touching you. Smelling you. Holding you. He needed to find a way to do more than this. To be welcomed back into your life, even just a little bit, so that he could prove himself. He couldn’t just sit here pathetically crying on your apartment building’s rooftop while he eavesdropped.

With a frustrated growl, Matt threw himself over to the next rooftop, heading back out into the night.

Groaning, you woke up to that familiar, unpleasant dizziness as your alarm rang out on the nightstand beside you. Pulling a hand up from out of the sheets, you turned off your alarm before running your hand across your forehead, keeping your eyes closed and waiting for the sensation to pass. It was a few minutes before it finally did, and you slowly began to toss the sheets off of yourself. 

Throwing your legs over the side of the bed, you reached over and grabbed the half-full tumbler of water from your nightstand. You had been keeping one there every night lately, noticing that the cool water sometimes helped ease the nausea that woke you from a dead sleep. 

Bringing the tumbler up to your parched lips, you slowly drank a few sips down. Your stomach immediately grumbled, churning once the water reached it. Groaning again, you stopped drinking, not wanting to push your luck and end up hunched over your toilet again. Apparently you still had a few more weeks before the morning sickness generally wore off for most women in pregnancy, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t counting down the days. You’d celebrate with a cup of coffee–assuming the scent of it didn’t still deter you.

Rising up onto your feet, you groggily trudged your way out of the bedroom and across the hall to your bathroom. You flipped on the light, setting your tumbler down on the bathroom counter so you could relieve your very full bladder. You’d woken up a handful of times to pee in the middle of the night, but yet somehow there always seemed to be more to empty.

When you’d finished in the bathroom, you shuffled your way down the hallway, throwing a hand over your mouth as you yawned. If only you could have crawled back into bed and taken the day off of work. It was the last thing you felt like doing today. But as you made your way past your couch in the living room, something had caught your eye and you paused.

Doubling back you stopped at the armrest of the couch, staring down at what was positioned in the middle of it. A blue plush narwhal with a gold horn sat smiling back at you. One that hadn’t been there earlier.

For a moment all you could do was stand there and stare at it, confusion washing over you. Until you remembered how you’d gotten hungry in the middle of the night last night and made yourself a grilled cheese. And you’d been talking to your baby bump aloud, musing what they may or may not be like in the future.

You gasped when realization dawned on you, your hand flying back up to your mouth. Matt must have been nearby, eavesdropping on the conversation you were having. He must’ve heard you mention narwhals last night, and then apparently decided to run out and buy one–and the thought of him doing that dressed as Daredevil was admittedly amusing–before slipping into your apartment and leaving it here for you to find. For the baby.

As you trudged your way over to the couch, setting your tumbler down onto the coffee table and collapsing into the couch cushions, you didn’t know what to make of that. Picking up the stuffed narwhal, you hugged it to your chest, your eyes closing. Half of you wanted to be pissed that he’d been listening in without your knowledge, wondering if he’d been doing that often, but the other half of you was touched. It may not have been a grand gesture, but it was a gesture that clearly meant something. But what exactly still remained to be seen.

Tag List: @mattmurdocksstarlight @just-going-through-the-motions @paracosmic-murdock @yeonalie @auroraslibrary @1988-fiend @will-delete-this-later-probably @two-unbeatable-beaters @danzer8705 @ragamuffin285 @callmebrooklynbabes @spookyboogyuniverse @peachy-aisha @stevenknightmarc @nerdytreeflower @fucktthisworld @remuslupinwifee @kmc1989 @thychuvaluswife @mywellspringoflife @thornbushrose @yarrystyleeza @shiorimakibawrites @marvelcinematiquniverse @vallovesthedilfs @scoliobean @this--is--music @mattmurdocks6thscaleapartment @ashlynhasmanyhyperfixations @swissy23 @lilthbunny @that-girl-named-alex @warsaur @lareinaisabelle @pazii @senjoritanana @mischiefmanaged71 @xxdrixx @jess-rye @hannahbohen @theclassicvinyldragon

The tags aren't working for some and I'm not entirely sure why (could be a settings issue or just tumblr being annoying, I'm sorry!)

[daisyvisions]

hi my lovely,

Sorry for the delayed response - I've got a bit of a head cold atm which is a pain in the backside but I'm okay besides that - I had a bit of a mental health decline sometime in the year so it's been just me working my way back up from that.

But I get where you're coming from with the overwhelming suddenness of it all. I know whatever I say, it'll either be things you already know or have been told before but I'm gonna say it anyways: you really do got this, Daisy. I don't think you need to worry about fucking anything up because, well, not only is this a new job but also, you wouldn't have made it there if you weren't capable. Besides, I know we all dread making mistakes at work but it really is just a learning opportunity and I think as long as you're able recognise and navigate yourself through it, you'll be okay. But I don't think thats a bridge you have to worry about just yet.

You sound like you're still in the adjustment period, understandably so because it sounds like it was a very instant change. I get why you feel that way because even if you were prepared to start this job, I don't think anyone is ever fully ready for just what it encompasses, especially not the sudden overwhelm. So give yourself a bit of grace, my lovely.

And honestly, if you find, down the line, you're not feeling it, you can always find another job. I'm very aware that that's easier said than done but I think we as humans tend to get very wrapped up in work and we forget that we aren't bound to our jobs and if it isn't fitting right for us, that we can leave (speaking from experience). But again, it is a new job so just give yourself time and go easy on yourself, lovely.

And honestly, good on you for not letting yourself be clouded by negativity. Just make sure you're not bottling it up! Please make sure you have a healthy outlet for yourself. It'll 100% make things easier on you.

I went off on one a bit but i just wanted to lrt you know you've got this, my lovely.

take care of yourself, stay safe, stay healthy and I'm wishing you all the best!! And if you ever want to talk, I'm here <3

-☕️

this was nice to read, thank you so much for sending this babes you dont know how much I appreciate it 🥺 I think the hardest part for me (like generally) is not being too hard on myself and thats something I have to practice undoing so to speak because that's what really gets me like this (the overthinking, the imposter syndrome, that im not good enough, etc) 😭 again thank you even if you didnt have to, thank you for sending these words and having a kind soul 🥺💕 I appreciate you a lot! and you've got this too!

[the1975attheirverybest]

Wow, that's surely a lot...it's easy from me to say it bc I not involved but he sounds like a douchebag. I get how complicated relationships might be so there's no judging here, just I think you deserve someone who would make more of an effort for you, but I also know someone we tend to get back to what we already know bc it's comforting even if it's damaging to us.

I also know you're an independent woman who certainly doesn't need some random people' opinion so I apologise, but know it comes from a place of caring.💕

no, no, honestly if you knew the number of things that i put up with from this man you'd be like "do you....have brain damage? or no self-respect? cuz its either one or the other" hahaha.

That birthday was genuinely one of the worst days of my life it gets so much worse. Earlier that day I'd been like "i know it's MY birthday but I got YOU a present" and I gave him something that he'd really wanted for a while. and he even joked "oh i feel like it's MY birthday now haha" LMAOOO. thats not even the half of it. ANYWAYSSSS yeah he was pretty shitty to me the whole time but I stuck around and clung to the memory of the first 3 months between us when things were good.

Learn from my mistakes kiddos, dont let anyone treat you like this. he's just a man. hit him with your car.*

*for legal reasons this is a joke.

[pastel-c4rtmansz]

hi!!! can i request cartman x jewish reader? maybe she introduces him to her faith and he learns to be nicer?

thats a cool theme! here u go 🤍💕 -mod tweek

premise: you are kyle's cousin who's moved in to live with his family ⌒☆

"Cartman, just please please promise me you won't make fun of her. I swear she's really cool once you get to know her. I'll give you 20 bucks if you dont bother her for this whole week at least while she's just getting settled in. That means no Jew jokes around her. Not even if it's about me." Kyle pleaded while getting himself seated in class. "Yeah yeah whatever. I just need the 20 bucks. After this week though, don't expect me to be nice." Cartman said dismissively. "Fine."

Mr. Garrison clapped, getting the class's attention, "Alright class, settle down. Today is a very important day. We have a new student with us today. I expect you all to be on your best behavior. especially you Eric" Cartman rolled his eyes. "Everyone please welcome Y/N"

Y/N walked through the door, her head slightly turned down while she played with her fingers.

Cartman's eyes widened. "Woah.. she's hot.." Kenny said muffled through his orange parka. Cartman slightly nodded. "Dude, that's my cousin. watch it." Kyle turned back towards the two.

"Don't just stand there like a whore in church, tell us a bit about yourself." Mr. Garrison nudged Y/N. "Uhm.. well I'm from (your hometown/city/state), I'm Jewish, Kyle is my cousin actually haha, and i actually love kfc.. I don't know.. anything else I think that's it." "Well alright Y/N, why don't you go sit next to Eric over there. Eric raise your hand." Cartman didn't move. "ERIC GOD DAMMIT RAISE YOUR HAND" "fine, sorry" Cartman shot his hand up. Y/N sat next to Cartman and threw her bag on the floor next to her. Kyle eyed Cartman making sure he wasn't pulling anything stupid.

After around an hour of Mr. Garrison explaining his love life, he finally spoke about something school related, "Anyways moving on from my Tinder hookups, I actually assigned you guys a project. It's gonna be about the book Twilight. listen I know Principal Victoria doesn't think it's school appropriate but I think it's a beautiful love story. For the project you'll have to do a slideshow on whether you're team Edward or team Jacob. This is an individual project so you'll be doing it by yourself, except for Y/N. Y/N since you haven't had enough time to read the book you can work with Eric. I'm sure he'll help you just fine. Get to work guys."

Kyle side-eyed Cartman as another warning. Cartman just stared back innocently.

"So, uh, Y/N who should I choose to side with?" Cartman turned towards her. Y/N shrugged, "Bro I don't know you're the one who read it, not me." "Okay, first of all don't be a bitch. Second.. I guess I'll go with Edward" Y/N took out her phone to check the time, "Sounds good to me.. when's lunch by the way?" "At like 11:30. why?" "I'm hungry. I think my aunt packed me kfc for my first day." Kyle who was eavesdropping responded, "Yeah she did. She packed some for me too. You made a mistake of telling this fatass that though" "AYE DON'T CALL ME FAT YOU STUPID JE- you stupid idiot." Cartman caught himself. '20 bucks 20 bucks 20 bucks' He kept repeating to himself in his head. "Yeah, that's what I thought." Kyle gave him a sly smirk. Y/N cleared her throat shifting in her seat, "Uh anyways, i-if you want I guess I can do some research on Edward for the project to help you. I feel kinda shitty making you do all the work-" "Don't feel bad whenever me and him are paired up he makes me do all the fucking work because he's an annoying shit." Kyle cut her off. "MIND YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS KAHL." Cartman retorted. Y/N turned back to Cartman "..Anyways if you wanna come over later to work on this I'm sure my aunt won't mind. She'd be happy I'm making friends." "What! I don't want him coming over Y/N please-" "Shut up Kahl. Sure I'll come over Y/N! It'd be my pleasure" Cartman said in a disgustingly sweet voice giving Kyle the same sly smirk he got from him earlier. Kyle stared daggers into him.

Time skip to lunch

"Dude, he's just hanging out with her for a project. It's not like they're dating." Stan comforted Kyle. "Yeah, I'm sure it'll be fine," Kenny patted his back. "Whatever, I just don't want him near her. He's a horrible influence and a horrible person. Y/N's a good person, I don't want her being corrupted by him. Plus, once this week is over he's just gonna resort to bullying her."

Cartman sat at the table, followed by Y/N. Kyle rolled his eyes looking over at Stan who just gave a sympathetic look. "So uh how is your day going so far Y/N?" Stan broke the tense atmosphere. "It's going pretty well. Everyone's really nice. I'm hanging out with Wendy tomorrow, she's your girlfriend right Stan?" Y/N smiled. "Oh, yeah she is. She's really sweet, you guys will be great friends." Stan smiled back.

Y/N took the kfc out of her bag. As expected, Cartman's mouth watered at the sight. Taking notice to him eyeing her piece of chicken Y/N spoke, "Do you want a piece? You can just ask, you know. We're basically friends." She giggled. A light shade of pink dusted Cartman's cheeks, barely noticeable to everyone except.. Kyle.. His cheeks grew red too, not from good feelings though. An explosive anger grew inside of him. Stan began to ask, "Uh dude are you okay-" "WHAT THE FUCK FATASS!" Kyle yelled. The cafeteria went silent except for Kenny's giggles. "THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR KAHL?" "I NEED TO SPEAK WITH YOU RIGHT FUCKING NOW." Kyle forcefully pulled Cartman into the hallway.

"What do you want!?" Cartman half yelled. "DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON MY FUCKING COUSIN?"

"Kahl I-"

"ANSWER ME YOU FAT FUCK."

"WHY DOES IT MATTER?"

"BECAUSE YOU'RE A NO GOOD ASSHOLE. YOU'LL RUIN HER. REMEMBER HEIDI?"

"DUDE I'VE CHANGED."

"Yeah fucking right. Stay away from her or I'll kick your ass in front of everyone."

Kyle stormed off back into the cafeteria, slowly followed by Cartman.

Y/N stared quizzically at Stan who just shrugged back at her.

"Uh.. anyways are you still coming over after school?" Y/N asked Cartman. Kyle banged his head on the table letting out a loud groan. "Yes, yes I am Y/N."

Time skip after school

"Sorry if my room's a bit messy, I haven't really had time to unpack all my stuff yet" Y/N sat on her bed. "No, it's fine." Cartman smiled looking around. "So.. uhm before we get started, can I ask you something?" Y/N said fidgeting with the fabric of her comforter. "Yeah, fine."

"Why do you and Kyle hate each other so much?"

"..Well.. it's been happening since we're like 4. It's not that big of a deal."

"Then why'd he get so mad at you earlier? I've never seen him like that before."

With a slightly visible blush on his cheeks, Cartman sat next to her on the bed.

"It's.. it's because he doesn't want us dating. Fucking stupid, right? Like I just met you" Cartman dodged the fact that he liked her despite just meeting her that day.

"Why? I mean you seem sweet enough.. Also.. I don't think it's stupid to like someone you just met. Sometimes when you know you just know. you know?" Y/N finally met his eyes.

"Yeah.. yeah I do know." His voice lowered.

They unintentionally inched closer together. Soon enough, without even having time to think about it, their lips met. They stayed like that for a little. Just kissing each other like nothing else mattered.. that was until Kyle opened her door, "Y/N my mom asked if you wanted- HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FUCK. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME CARTMAN?!" "UH OH" Cartman shot up from her bed. "I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS FATASS"

"NOT A CHANCE JEW" Cartman ran past him.

Long story short, Cartman got beat up. Despite Kyle's pleas though, Y/N and Cartman started a romantic relationship.

[tengens-bunny]

i started this blog for fun and because i enjoyed writing fanfiction, but i eventually grew out of the kny fandom because of some of the people i met who made this whole tumblr experience just an awful experience

everyone is so obsessed with numbers, gatekeeping, and stirring the pot with stupid rumors that are either twisted, didnt know the full story, or just aren’t true (taken out of context even) there were also people from other fandoms that were literally just crazy and hate anons (i dont think i received as many as other people but it was still sad to see other people get bashed on)

my blog was my babey and i put so much work into everything i did, but i eventually started to hate my blog as a whole, it got to a point where i couldnt even consume fanfiction anymore because i was afraid that if it was similar to something i wrote i would get called out or cancelled for it

even tho no one owns a single trope, theme and etc.

my tumblr is no more and i dont think i’ll ever come back, but some of my works can still be found on AO3 (:

i still get those late night writing ideas i think about posting, and maybe i will post them, but i’ll prob assume a different alias by then 💕

much love to everyone who followed, supported, loved and defended me and my blog; it’s a privilege and honor to be considered a blog you once enjoyed

edit: not everyone likes me and thats okay thats life, everything is also spoken over text too so its hard to understand someone’s tone, it’s also frustrating when people dont read rules before requesting bc i worked hard to create them, i also started the blog at 19 i think so i’ve grown and learned from my own mistakes i made in the past and interacting with others; but also base your opinion on others based on your own interactions not through someone elses

[chaotic-kitty]

Hi! I dont know if ur gonna accept this bc u have 5 request working on but, Can i request a Ftlog poly relationship them reacting to mc actung submissive? Feel free to ignore! Have a nice day/night!😅😅

Hiiii! I was happy to do this! But dear gods i had trouble with it. Apparently for good as i am writing for dominant characters, I’m not necessarily as good at writing for submissive characters.😅 But i did my best and it was great practice. Anyways, i hope this is okay? It is kinda short. Thank you so much for your request!! Sorry for any mistakes. Enjoy!💕

For The Love Of Gods M6 Reacting To Poly! MC Acting Submissive

Warnings: Explicit Content (NSFW)

There where a few incidents where you reacted a certain way that made them just kinda stop and look at you surprised.

But it wasnt until you were all at the table talking and teasing each other, when one of them answered you with “Good girl/boy/GN alternative” and caused you to start stammering and blushing hard.

All of them just stopped and looked at you, blushing when they realised why you reacted like that.

They’re all a bit surprised to say the least.

They weren’t necessarily not expecting you to be submissive, they just hadn’t really thought about it.

Though out of everyone, Vidas picks up quicker that your quite submissive.

After realising that you may be more submissive, they all do things to see how you react and to confirm their suspicions.

Will also just ask you outright (at an appropriate time.)

After that they up their teasing. (consensually though. They won’t do it if you dont like it.)

You will have times where they all gang up and tease you, knowing exactly what’s going to happen later~😏

Vidas is the worst one for teasing you and getting you worked up like that.

Out of all of them, Vidas is also more dominant, while Eeri is more submissive. And the rest of them fall somewhere in between the two when it comes to dom/sub ect. But all of them are willing to dom at times.

As they learn more and more, they all become better and better at knowing exactly what elicits that reaction from you.

If you have a praise kink, they will also praise you so much.

They’re not scared to do things in public, it just makes everything more fun and risky.

They’re all into experimenting with a sub/dom relationship if thats what you want.

Will also definitely explore the world of BDSM with you, if you want.

Vidas also has a big thing for cuffing and blindfolding you. (Among other things……But I’ll leave that to your imagination.)

You guys literally have eternity together so, you will all end up having a lot of time to experiment and try all different things.

But for whatever you’re into in bed, none of them fail to satisfy you. They are all mind blowing in bed. Vidas and Eeri with their encyclopaedic knowledge of things, always know new ways to spice things up. And Leo with his stamina can be going quite literally all through the night.

[catboys-need-milk]

WAIT!! You have snakes?? Can we learn about them?? I love snakes so much <3

- 💫

Yes!! And sure I can tell you about them ♡

snakey descriptions below!! 🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

Jeremy—Red Tail Boa. My sweet boy, my prince. Has the GOOFIEST lil' face. Ive had him the longest so we've been through a lot together. He practically acts like a dog, like he'll chill on my lap for hours probably if I let him. There's been a couple times over the years where I accidentally fell asleep while I had him out (which was irresponsible, usually i dont handle any animals if i feel tired), and he was just right there coiled up against me when I woke up (probably just because I was warm, but still haha)

Nicholas—Goini Kingsnake. My crazy boy, mistakes my fingers for food a lot 😅 But funnily enough, he's the one snake I can let just out and explore my desk while I'm working on my paintings or sculptures. He always curious about what I'm doing, nosing through my materials and tools and seemingly coming over to inspect what im putting on the page. I call him my "biggest fan" of my work because even if I might not like how the piece is turning out, he always seems intrigued. Hehe, though every once in a while if i reach for something he'll strike at me from across the table because he thinks my hand is a rat 😅😅😅 its honestly quite charming

Ripley—Jungle Carpet Python. Alien spawn. Good boy, but very sQuiRmY! Carpet pythons are very strong arboreal snakes, and literally if he grabs ANYTHING with his tail its like an all-hands-on-deck situation to get him to let go of it. Its mainly because of him that I bought and modified a kitty tree/cat tower for the snakes so they have something to hangout and climb on

Phillip—Ball Python. My slug boy. Sketchy demeanor. I found him huddled in a sink when he was but a small boy! He had escaped from his tank at the place I used to work at, and when I found him my manager asked if I wanted to keep him. Literally like 12 hrs before I was talking about how I wasn't interested in getting a ball python, and here I was going "THIS MY NEW BABEY??!?!? 💕"

Pepper—Coastal Carpet Python. Another alien creature. She's not that big now but will grow up to be the largest at around 9-11 ft. Used to be very bitey when she was teeny and it was admittedly very cute, but she's mellowed out now and always seems inquisitive when we go open her doors

Jaeger— Northern Pine Snake. He's my biggest at 7 ft. Very grumpy looking face but its so cute. I call him "Mr. Jaeger", because he's kind of a decrepid old man. Or well, at least I think he's old. I bought him for extremely cheap from some evasive, dishonest guy 5,000 miles away. When he arrived he was in bad shape, but I got him cured of everything and built him a big nice enclosure, even hand sculpted a huge rock cave and painted a forest mural for him. His body shape is odd for a pine snake who's supposedly 8, which is why I think he may actually be old. He also has a messed up eye, but he was probably born with it.

AHHH SORRY WTF I RAMBLED FOR TOO LOOONNGG ^_^' I guess i just really love the critters, we have lizards and bugs too but these are the snakes haha

(=^･ｪ･^=))ﾉ彡☆

[collectionoftulips]

hi! it's me! (once again, I'm so sorry if this is long or stupid, just feel free to ignore it!)

first of all, i dont know if it is intentional or if it is something that just grows out of you as you write further chapters, but i feel that these last chapters are more... intimate? i mean, they *feel* more intimate for us readers (or at least me). and it's so cool that as they begin trusting each other more and more, their relationship building up, so does the writing style. it's a bit magic, actually ✨

i would give my life for gregory and hyacinth in this fic, no questions asked. their support to anthony!!! i mean obviously the family is supportive, but something about the way they are so hyped warms my heart. and on the same line, i can already see hy and kate watching kate's old performances and kate helping her and becoming her role model, somehow (and anthony obviously melting at the sight of this)

also i feel like anthony every chapter when the new dance style is mentioned, searching on youtube. i know zero about dances so it is always fun and interesting to learn!!

i dont know what else to say, appart from that i love this fic and im always thinkin "oh i want to read the next one" and become frustrated when i just cant because of time. but it makes me happy to see the update email! and i find myself thinking of scenes througout my day

and... quotes time!!

"The lack of memory was not immediately apparent, but rather something that only became clear once he tried to backtrack his steps, there was just… nothing" im not going to lie, this sentence and at the beginning really scared me, i thought that he might have messed it up

"It wasn’t so much that he could remember seeing her, only that he could recall being aware of her." i GASPED. i don't know why, because it is actually not that huge, but this sentence really screams that he *likes* her, he *notices* her

"He told himself that there was something good about the fact that she waited by the door, holding it for him, instead of running in the other direction. That it was normal for the pang of affection that warmed his heart to be there as they stood almost near enough that he could smell the lilies of what he suspected was her hair conditioner." okay, this one is long but my sweet bean trying to convince himself that the pang is normal! oh sweetie

"The judges only saw a snapshot of his dancing, Kate saw everything, all the flaws and mistakes as well as the small progresses, and if she thought he could do this - who was he to disagree?" + "The certainty she expressed by stating this fact was almost enough to quell Anthony’s doubts" he trusts her so much and he is so moved by her trust, i could cry

"It was just dancing, Anthony knew that, but he couldn’t help but wonder if it didn’t feel a little bit like magic." just, screaming. that's it

and that final quote... my boy is flling fast!!

once again, thank you thank you thank you for this fic! im sorry if this is messy or has typos but im writing on the notes app so that i dont forget anything, just fresh out of the reading. anyway, thank you and have a great day! ❤️❤️💕

It is not long or 'stupid' in the slightest - don't apologise. I am just sorry it's taken me ages to respond. I blame the cold I had though, which seems to have robbed the concept of time from me entirely. I really love these asks I get, they genuinely make my day.

I'm so glad you feel like the chapters are growing gradually more intimate - it was definitely something I was hoping to convey with the progression of each chapter and each stage of the competition. I'm so thrilled you like it ❤️

I love writing Hyacinth and Gregory in this story. I also find their unwavering support for Anthony's endeavours really endearing and hopefully this most recent chapter that I just posted gives some extra context as to why and hints a bit more clearly at the type of relationship they have with him.

I don't know anything about these dances either and I actually look up some of the basic steps on YouTube and learn some vague rules for each dance to help me write it a bit better, and it's so much fun.

Genuinely, thank you so much for these asks, they are so sweet and kind ❤️ Been feeling a bit iffy about my writing recently and this helps me a lot not being all like 'I'm just gonna throw in the towel because clearly my writing is meh'. So thank you ❤️