#i feel like i'm a terrible person with theories because all i know how to do is cherrypick details and then turn to the camera and go

[rekino2114]

Telling Sara that you're the sacrifice

Pairing:sara chidouin x gn reader

A/n:ok so I have a bit of an announcement, I'm currently getting back into yttd like a lot and so I'm going to write a lot of posts for it. if you have any ideas for it, then please request you have no idea how much I want to write for this game. Normally I'd apologize for making a lot of posts of the same fandom but not in this case, yttd is my favorite thing ever and it's so underrated, I need and want to write wayyy more for it so you'll get more yttd posts and you'll like it

This is a remake of a post I did in my early days that I wanted to rewrite

Also I need to write some sara fluff asap. There are so many graphics of her crying, it genuinely feels like in half of her cgs she's having a mental breakdown and that made me sad, that's why I'll never believe the theories that say she's the mastermind...at least the one we play as but that's a whole other thing

This takes place before the second main game

The first thing that came to Sara's mind when you revealed your role to her werr memories, terrible memories that made her feel like she's strangled all over again

Clickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclick

She's unsure if she should cry, she was obviously heartbroken but you had it worse, knowing you were going to die and being able to do basically nothing about it she had to give you hope, that's what she had been doing this entire game after all.....but she couldn't

She fell to her knees and started crying, this couldn't be happening, not again, she had already lost one of the most precious people she had because of that card and this game and now (I'm swearing to you now autocorrected to Joe, even my phone is making fun of sara wtf) she was going to lose the most important person in her life, the one who helped her get through this hell and inspired her to be the leader and motivator she had been this entire time

You would die because of her, she didn't know why this game existed but if there was something she figured out while investigating is that somehow for some reason, it was created because of her, no for her, everyone had been gathered here for her sake and so even if indirectly, she was responsible for the death of everyone, Mishima, Kai....Joe....and your inevitable one

She wondered if your hallucination would have been kinder than Joe's but in reality, she knew that was just baseless hopeful positivity. You would have been even more cruel,even more terrifying. The projection of you that her mind would create would call her a murderer over and over again, would strangle her and show her the vision of whatever brutal death the floormasters would choose to inflict on you until she refused to sleep in fear of those images plaguing her nightmares

Was she about to go through all that again, all that trauma, hallucinations and pure despair knowing that it was her fault? Was every step she took to deal with Joe's death and this entire situation completely meaningless? Was this what this game was all about? giving her the slimmest sliver of hope that she would be able to save everyone and get out of here only to destroy it by killing everyone she cared about and forcing her to make choices that resulted in their deaths until her heart was reduced to pulp and she became even emptier than the dolls that roamed this place

......no.....she loved you too much....she couldn't allow you to die like that...no matter what

"......y/n....."

You could already tell there was something weird about her the moment she started speaking, she wasn't crying anymore but her voice lacked the usual warmth it was like all of the emotions had been drained out of her body

"....how many tokens do you have?"

You were taken aback by this...surely she couldn't mean....trading the sacrifice to someone else

"...a-about 20 or so......I didn't trade that much and I spend the ones I had"

".......I see"

She held your hands, and that action, which usually brought you so much comfort, made you sweat and caused your heart to skip a beat, not from love or embarrassment. You were anxious, for some reason Sara's weird tone and actions made you anxious, a worry that only grew when she started whispering in your ear

"Do you trust me y/n?"

".....y-yes....Sara what's hap-"

"I'll tell everyone you betrayed me, I'm sure they'll believe me....and they'll vote for you"

Your eyes widened as she continued talking, she couldn't be serious

"I'm sure at least sou will have some doubts but I'll find a way to counter him...and then we'll get enough votes to-"

"S-sara stop this, what are you saying!?"

She raised her head just a bit and just looking at her made any worry that something was wrong increase even more her usually beautiful purple eyes lacked any kind of sparkle or warmth, the only noticeable feature being the slight redness caused by the crying, they were completely dead as they looked at you with a weird emotion, it was Sara's usual protectiveness and love mixed with something much much darker

"I'm not letting you die, no matter what I have to do, i-"

Before she could finish you hugged her, wrapping her arms around her torso and your head on her shoulder, this simple action snapped sara out of her trance

"......y/n?"

"....Sara....please stop it....this....isn't you"

Between every word there was a small sniffle....you were crying too

".....y-y/n"

This realization made her regret everything she had just done, why had she said that in the first place? It was like something possessed her, a side of herself that she didn't fully know about, one that would do anything to ensure her and your survival no matter how manipulative or evil she had to be

Hearing your soft crying and pleading made her come back to her senses and she hugged you back

"...sara"

"....i-i'm....so sorry....I don't know what"

She felt tears come back to her eyes, and no matter how much she wanted to look strong for you, to give you hope she couldn't hold them back in

"Please....forgive me"

".....it's alright.....this must be so hard for you"

"N-no don't- you're the one who"

Sara felt your hug get tighter

"You've been forced into this game and have lost so much....and yet...You still manage to guide everyone and show them hope"

You pulled back from the hug and looked directly at sara, tears staining your eyes, cheeks and clothes

"You're so strong sara"

With that sara fully broke down, her tears started flowing even more, and she hugged you again, fully throwing her head in your chest and staining your clothes with her tears

"W-what are you saying! I couldn't protect Joe! I couldn't protect you! All of the deaths here happened because I let everyone believe that there was hope when there was none, the only thing I'm good at is spouting positivity that results in even more death!"

"That's not true at all sara"

To her surprise, your voice was completely calm. She could still hear the occasional sniffle, but your voice was so calm and comforting even, it definitely wasn't the tone of someone who was about to die in a few hours....no that was the tone of someone who had accepted their death and that realization made sara cry even more before your next words made her sadness vanish slightly to make room for surprise

"You truly are a strong warrior, never giving up, always being there for others, giving them hope, you're the strongest person I ever met"

"B-but-"

"Do you have any idea how many people in your situation would be crushed by the overwhelming despair, by the trauma and everything that happened? How many people would just give up on life right here... but you didn't, you keep living with your head high, and not only that, you transmit that determination to everyone else, there are incredibly few people with that mix of charisma, determination and hope, be proud of that sara.....you really are....so strong"

".............."

"Now wipe those tears alright? You look so much more beautiful when you smile"

".....y-y/n...you...you can't just accept this-"

"I'm not"

"!?"

"....of course I'm not accepting this game, I want to fight back against it and against everything....but....I can't....so the least I can do is give you the hope to look forward, so that you can keep being the strong samurai woman I love"

".....y/n...."

"I'm not asking you to save everyone, I'm asking you to not use my death as an excuse to stay rooted in despair, because that's exactly what the kidnappers want"

".......ahh *sniffle*"

"I don't care how much time you need, how many people you need to ask for help, promise me that you will stay strong and eventually face the people who killed me head on and survive, because you did nothing wrong, you didn't kill me, these kidnappers did"

"....yes...y/n....I promise"

Seeing that she had calmed down and fully understood and agreed to what you said you smiled and hugged her again

"Me and Joe will watch you from above so don't think you can just break the promise without consequences ok?"

"Hehe, of course, I'd never"

Hearing her laugh, even if muffled by sniffles, was so comforting and seeing her smile through tears when you pulled back put your soul fully at peace

"Let's go do something now, I want to spend my last hours with the person I love the most in the world"

....y/n...I love you so much"

"...me too"

You two smiled at each other and then kissed, it would probably be the last kiss you would ever share but it was not one filled with desperation and regret but love and hope for the future

[bantersnatch]

havent finished it yet but this must be a huge episode for you. vic michostis torment and problems

i'm still REELING yeah. spoilers under the cut for some particulars that are haunting me.

my theory senses start tingling whenever vic drops a specific like this into the scene unprompted. why the doctor set? this detail wasn't in response to anything to do with steffi as presented in the edit we got -- so either it was vic just throwing another ball into the game for corin to play with, or it was vic doing that... and also twining in something from the host's backstory?

this is a long shot to say the least, but the medical theming is certainly striking. it could indicate a number of things about the host's childhood.

later, after the two have played patty cake together, we get this:

...ah. yeah. that kind of clarifies the potential interpretations, if you're as brain-poisoned as i am. it's a pretty clear line between a doctor set, medicine, and.... hmm. fill in the blanks.

this opens up a whole can of worms. and questions. and it's upsetting! so, vip as usual.

[alchemistc]

Post finale crack treated seriously. Ravi "Who's Tommy" Panikkar stirring shit up for his new friend.

red string

"You know you guys are like, weirdly interconnected, right?" Ravi asks, like Buck hasn't spent the last ten minutes admitting he doesn't know how to reach out to Tommy.

"How would you know?"

Ravi has the grace to look a little squirrelly for half a second. "Okay so I know a lot of people at the LAFD. Because of the Academy stint. And - well, a lot of them know I own rentals."

"Thanks for letting me do month to month, by the way."

"Yeah you sure did remind me that you saved my life a bunch of times before I agreed to that. I had to send in a special request with the company that runs that apartment building."

"Your life is way more important than a special request, Ravi."

Ravi looks like he has something else to say about that, but.

"You're veering off the point. I'm trying to tell you you two have like, a weird red string thing going on and it's kind of driving me crazy that you won't just figure it out and go live in his house month to month until you figure out your crap and like, elope like the crazy people you are."

Buck takes a second to let that sink in. "Have you been asking all your LAFD buddies about Tommy and me?" His narrowed eyes don't seem to have the same effect as Hen's. Ravi stares back at him like he's making a stupid face.

"In my defense, I did try to ask you but you spent weeks trying to find a way to pull his pigtails."

He's not touching that with a ten foot pole. Nice ammo for when he gets home, though. "So you, what, put together an itemized list of reasons we should be together?"

"Gross. No. I gossiped, like a normal person."

"Lists are important, Ravi."

"If you don't do something on your own I'll get his number from one of the guys at Harbor I know and tell him about all the baked goods you foisted on me for two solid months after he dumped you. And about all the pining I've had to put up with since -."

"Evan. Hey."

Buck is the sort of person who always wants to play it cool and never quite manages. The table jumps when he cracks his knee against it.

And there he is, in all his glory. Date night chic, four buttons undone, hair perfectly tousled, probably that aftershave that always made Buck want to live in the junction between his neck and shoulder.

"And that's my cue," Ravi says, and does a terrible approximation of a wink as he scoots out of the booth. "This is a setup. I set you both up. Tommy, this beer is yours, please sit. Don't make me do this a third time."

And then he's gone.

Tommy slides in, and it's familiar in a way that Buck doesn't enjoy.

Ravi reappears. "I already had his number, that was a decoy because I saw him walking in. Please, for the love of God, talk this time."

They stare at each other for a long, long time. Tommy has this way of looking at him that always makes Buck feel like he could run through a brick wall. Like Tommy would take care of him after even though it was a dumb thing to do. Like Tommy would thank him for the opportunity to take care of him.

"So Ravi has a theory," Tommy says, after they've taken their fill of staring in silence.

"I kept interrupting him but it kinda sounded like he's been spending way too much time dissecting our lives."

Tommy's smile lights up this dingy sports bar like nothing else. "Kinda reminds me of you, if I'm honest."

"He doesn't even like spreadsheets, Tommy."

"God, I love you."

It's a terrible place to start.

It's an excellent way to keep going.

[croquettish]

Claustrophobia as a Metaphor for Hans' Feelings for Henry

All right. I'm ready to go full tinfoil hat here but I have a theory, y'all. And there is a lot of evidence to back it up even if you decide I'm off my rocker for most of it:

I think Hans' claustrophobia exists in parallel to his feelings and, more importantly, how Hans feels about his feelings for Henry.

We first get the hint that Hans is claustrophobic when he and Henry get tossed into the dungeon at Trosky:

This is immediately post-divorce era. The boys haven't quite yet made up and Hans has gotten his first taste of what life is like without Henry. He did not care for it, and that realization comes alongside an incredibly unexpected vulnerability that Hans is not used to and has not had to deal with before.

The threat of losing Henry before was of course something he could conceive of before, most recently following Henry's ~terrible fall, but that would have been losing him in the abstract. If he lost Henry because of their fight, that would be (at least in his eyes), 100% his fault, at least in part because-- as you'll recall-- Henry was ready to make up literally the next morning. Earlier, even, if you watch the way he tries to look at Hans while Hans is stubbornly staring away as if to keep from being persuaded by Henry's puppy dog eyes.

The divorce era presented a different sort of loss, namely losing Henry not because of God's will, but because of his own stubborn pride. He got Henry back after, but the risk was there and it's only after getting him back that the full weight of what he almost lost hits him. At the beginning, when he's still panicking in the cell, he's still in what he perceives to be the proverbial doghouse, and he promptly follows this up by eating crow and apologizing to Henry for being an asshole.

Panic abated.

Until Henry is taken away from him, of course, and the walls truly start closing in. I have to really commend the creative direction of this scene in particular because that zoom out + transition to a Dutch angle is so fucking haunting in this scene while we watch Hans clearly trying not to have a full breakdown. It really induces the feeling of claustrophobia even if a person doesn't suffer from it themselves.

Henry was taken away from him, and as far as he knows, he might never see him again. No wonder the walls start closing in on him.

After that, things return to normal. No bad claustrophobia concerns for some time, incidentally. Henry is there, and his feelings regarding Henry are completely logical and rational. What a good friend Henry is!

The next time we see Hans' claustrophobia flare up is after Nebakov is hit by the Finger of God/bombard. Hans is trapped under a beam and is (understandably) freaking the fuck out. We also know from his dialogue later on that this scene magnified his claustrophobia even more than it was before.

What's notable, however, is that Henry at this point is barely conscious and isn't responding to Hans. As far as he knows, Henry isn't alive. That bombard could have easily killed any/all of them and tbh it's kind of a miracle that it didn't. Never mind that after his brief foray into consciousness, Henry is promptly hit by a full-length ceiling beam and (presumably, logically) knocked the fuck out. Meanwhile Hans is being crushed by his own fear of his feelings.

We obviously don't know what happens between the time of the tower's destruction and the scene in the cart after, but we do know that Henry was woken up at dawn to the commotion and by the time they get done being tortured, it's very late at night. So presumably Henry was out cold for a while there. Not only are the walls closing in on Hans here, they're literally crushing him. The fear of losing Henry is more present than ever.

And to make matters worse, he has no idea when or even if he's ever going to see Henry again. Henry has no value as a hostage. He could easily be simply disposed of without a second thought.

Henry could die, and it would, in Hans' eyes, be all his fault. At this point his feelings on the matter are guilt and a tremendous amount of self-pity (as we later learn from Brabant). As if to coincide with Hans being confronted with his feelings regarding Henry and the loss of him at this point and time, he ends up stuck in his gilded cage at Maleshov.

Once again, the walls are closing in.

We learn about how he felt about this only later when we chat with him at the Devil's Den:

The big problem with the room, Hans explains, was simply that he couldn't leave.

If we bear in mind the claustrophobia : confrontation of feelings metaphor here, this makes sense. Henry could be dead. He could have been tortured. He could still be in captivity. Hell, depending on how you play Henry being tortured, he even tells the torturer to just go ahead and fucking kill him because he's not talking. Henry was ready to die.

Hans knows Henry. Extremely well. He knows that Henry has some truly insane principles that he will stick to no matter what. There's no doubt in my mind that Hans probably knows there is a good chance that Henry doesn't make it through this. And he's confronted with all of these feelings over an extended period of time where he gets to sit and spin.

In light of that, I think it's interesting that he calls it a hole, because I would never use a word like that to describe what is effectively a fancy hotel room. But figuratively speaking, of course it's a hole for him. He's despairing. He needs Henry in his life and there's nothing he can do to get to him or to save him. He can't leave.

And then, of course, Henry shows up after all. No wonder Hans looks so unbelievably elated to see him. Of course, this is when Henry brings up the secret passageway. Hans is told that he can leave this enclosed space for another, even tighter enclosed space!

Now, if you pick the correct dialogue option here and tell him that you'll make it through, together, Hans of course discloses that the shit about how it's not ~chivalrous was bullshit and that it's because he might endanger him:

He just spent the last x amount of time (depending on how long you had Henry dilly-dallying around Kuttenberg and its environs) trapped here and steeped in his feelings regarding Henry. The fear of losing him is at the top of this list. To Hans, going into that passageway could also make him lose Henry. And it would be his fault. Again.

There's also something to be said here about close quarters. If we're to return here to the metaphors, then those close quarters force Hans to confront his feelings for Henry. Henry even says it himself back when they're in the Trosky dungeon together:

From there, it's on to Raborsch. Which is where things get very interesting.

Hans is told that he's going to be getting married. Much like in the Trosky dungeon, we get that zoom (albeit in the other direction this time) and then his POV. The way time seems to slow, the wobble of the camera... being something of a panic attack haver myself, this is exactly what it feels like. It is honestly impressive how well they mimic the feeling of it. And the way it's executed almost makes it look as though the room is shrinking.

This is my own personal headcanon that will probably not be shared by most people, but I think this is the moment that Hans realizes that he's in love with Henry. It would make sense for him to feel faint and like the walls are closing in on him in that moment.

It's also the worst possible moment for him to realize.

And then he proceeds to try and shove those feelings aside and repress them as best as possible. Nevermind that yet again Henry isn't there to help support him.

There was a wonderful post going around the other day about why Hans' responses to the romantic dialogue options Henry chooses sound so platonic. Because... yeah. He's holding that shit in TIGHT. He is on LOCKDOWN.

And we see that reflected in where he chooses to place himself physically after that point!!!!

After the announcement, Godwin can find him outside on the balcony getting absolutely hammered and talking to Rabbi Jehuda.

Even at the Devil's Den, where he's objectively free, he feels... crowded. Like the walls are closing in on him:

No fucking wonder. If he just realized that he's in love with Henry, then at this point in the story he's still trying real hard to repress that shit. Hans is erecting these walls himself as if he's trying to choke these feelings out of him. It also makes sense why he's constantly going out to get away from this confrontation of feelings as much as possible, riding out whenever he can:

Even in the group meeting with the Devil's gang, he says this:

Now it's the whole tavern! Anywhere that has walls and a roof is choking the life out of him! And of course here Henry is suddenly fucking everywhere.

When talking to him about the rides he goes on in the surrounding areas, this line of inquiry leads him to ask if he's fucking poaching again, and Hans comes back by saying this:

Allow me to just say.

And I cannot stress this enough.

He did not need to tell Henry that.

Henry tells him as much, but it feels fairly obvious that this was said with intent. It's like he's trying to reinforce his own heterosexuality to both him and Henry.

I would also like to highlight here that to Hans, it's always outside that this heterosexuality occurs. Even at the baths those hookups are merely in tents. The girl from Bohunowitz he found in (or near) a hunter's camp in the forest.

So we see a pretty direct correlation here. The inside of pretty much any building (or passageway) that also contains Henry or the Absence of Henry (in the abstract) is profoundly unsafe. This is the space where feelings always seem to happen and where Realizations™️ occur.

So! The outside is safe! Nothing can get him there, not even his feelings for Henry!

It's interesting, then, that Hans decides to invite Henry into that very space not long after:

Even in the space Hans uses as an escape (including as an escape from Henry), he still wants Henry there. Much as I discussed in this post, Hans views hunting with Henry in this scene as an escape into the past. Pre-betrothal, pre-feelings. A simpler time and a return to normalcy.

Naturally, he has to counteract Henry's presence in the Comphet space by bringing up as much heterosexuality as possible:

He brings this up regardless of how you respond.

Depending on your dialogue choices, you then learn that the girl from Bohunowitz is named Karolina. (Tbh if I didn't know better, I'd assume she was fucking made up seeing as she shares a name with the same girl he was running after in The Amorous Adventures of Bold Sir Hans Capon and there is no such girl to be found in Bohunowitz.)

Regardless of whether you chose to tease him or grumble about his womanizing, Henry makes it pretty clear that he doesn't want to hear about it. He says something similar as well earlier, when Hans says that the girl from Bohunowitz (who may or may not be made up) gave him a ~ride:

Hans quickly changes the subject, but Henry keeps them on topic and brings it up again, effectively asking him if these wenches are more important to him than he is:

(Tbh it's pretty fucking obvious from these interactions that Henry is already feeling quite a lot here and is looking for validation from Hans... which Hans then, perhaps unwittingly, provides. Maybe he just can't help himself. The truth slips through the cracks.)

Hans immediately reassures him, of course:

At which point it's Henry's turn to brush him off and put some distance between them again.

Distance which Hans immediately closes up again...

... only to freak out and instantly backpedal.

The assault on Maleshov really hammers this connection home, where even outside, he can't run from his fear.

In this case, because the Finger of God fires and hits the fortress walls.

Hans falls back and just... stares.

And just stays there for a while. For long enough, in fact, that Henry and Godwin have to come help him up.

Henry, in this instance, is both the problem and the solution: all Hans has to do is accept the fact that he's in love with him—with a little help from Henry.

And then we get to the Italian Job. Hooo boy.

It does not escape my attention that these two dialogue options come up in the same conversation, one of which of course leads to a romance choice:

Henry tries to insist on how much he enjoys Hans' company only for Hans to brush him off. Quite substantially. Like if I was Henry I'd be fucking gutted or at the very least baffled that my friend could be that obtuse when I'm over here dropping all these hints.

And then, of course, Hans promptly panics again when Henry brings up the underground passage and asks if he's joining him in going through it (almost as if those two bits of panic are related).

He even brings up societal judgment! But I think it's that last one that carries by far the most weight. He's still looking for any possible way out that he can find and asking for validation from Henry while he's doing it. Which is asking quite a lot of Henry imo.

Of course, then he suddenly doesn't have a choice anymore. Which is also where Hans actually comes to terms with his feelings. He has to go through the passageway. There's no choice. The walls are closing in and he has to accept it or he'll go insane if he keeps repressing any of this any longer. The narrative is practically telling him: you can't run from this anymore. His feelings for Henry are real and they're right in front of him and they're not this terrifying thing that he's been running from all this time.

Katherine tells Henry that Hans was trailing behind Godwin and her "like a dazed sheep" and that she hopes he didn't get lost.

The good news is that he didn't. Instead, quite the opposite happened: he finally found his way to accepting how he feels.

And when he does, he finds that he's no longer afraid of them. Suddenly, as if out of nowhere, confronting his fears meant that they're not nearly as terrifying anymore.

Again, Henry asks if he's really all right, and Hans insists that he's never been better. No fucking wonder. This was a come-to-Jesus moment if ever I saw one.

And then he checks on Henry. All this time, he's been looking at his own fear, stuck in this, quite frankly, closet, and not thinking about how Henry has been feeling.

Even so, Henry is worried. At which point Hans gets to reassure him that, no, he's all right. In fact, the one holding him back and hurting him most in all of this has been none other than himself. If anything, Henry has been encouraging all this time. He does his job well. And that includes loving Hans.

Henry suggests that he overcame his fear, and Hans insists that no, that's not quite it.

Which makes sense. You don't just overcome your fears by facing them. Certainly not something like claustrophobia. It's also unlikely that an actual miracle occurred here. If you listen for his idle talk before or after this conversation, even Hans is absolutely baffled that he just... overcame his fear. Just like that.

To me, that suggests that this is about something else entirely, and not tight, enclosed spaces at all. He's always been afraid to face this part of himself.

In fact, if we recall what happened during their successful siege on Maleshov, Hans fell and couldn't recover without aid. Here, he fell and got himself up again because... it didn't kill him. It's okay to have—wait for it—fallen in love with Henry.

Is this a stretch? Maybe. But the fact that it happens twice makes me think that it was done with intent.

(If I wanted to bring in a real stretch here, I'd suggest that there's meaning behind the fact that Hans helps Henry up to his feet several times, first after his terrible fall at the beginning, while they're walking to Bozhena's, and again after he's on the floor getting kicked at the Semine wedding. If this was meant to be a hint as to where Henry realized that he was in love with Hans, having lost him first almost to death and then again to the divorce arc, it wouldn't surprise me tbh. He fell, and Hans was there to be his solution—the only difference is that Henry wouldn't have had a problem accepting it the way that Hans did. But, like I said, this one is a stretch.)

All of which brings us to the second confession.

Henry tried telling him this same exact thing before, after nearly losing him to the noose and their temporary split. Now he's saying this exact same thing again. Which feels... pointed and frankly intentional.

And this time, Hans responds in kind. He also cares about Henry. He's just really bad at showing it sometimes.

Because of course he's bad at it. He's spent the whole game thus far stuck in a closet of claustrophobia battling against his own internally homophobic demons.

But his success in a) escaping that closet and b) battling those demons brings us to the promised land.

Where they fuck in a (relatively, considering Hans' fear from before) small room and with Hans underneath Henry, the safest ceiling to come (down) on him of them all ♥

Addenda: [1], [2]

[c-a-n-a-t-i-l-a]

You know, let's talk about the elephant in the room, because I can't be silent anymore. I've never liked Toriel as a character. In Undertale, she seemed somehow hypocritical to me (and the ruins location itself is my least favorite). I feel a little better about her in Deltarune, BUT CHAPTER FOUR KILLED ME. I think she's not the best mother, here and there. I also believe in the theory that Sans of Undertale and Deltarune are the same person, with all his heart. The end of chapter 4 is… Well, it's disgusting in every way, judging by Kris. And each of these two can be condemned. But I've liked Sans as a character since 2016. He's so terrible and vile (IN DELTARUNE ESPECIALLY, BUT YOU'D BE WRONG IF YOU SAID IT MADE HIM WORSE….maybe it says something about me as a person HAHAHA), but he's perfect at it. And you know, no matter how bad this scene is, based on the theory I believe in, I can't help but admit that it's very beautifully tragic, and I'm thrilled with it

(and I think I starting to like soriel, I betrayed everything I believed in………..)

[gildeddlily]

absolutely losing my mind because of these two!!!

so.

are these two actually toxic, or are they just kids who don't know how to communicate? easy, they're just kids! (this was fast)

reading the manga will not make you understand that (or im just stupid), and this is why I'm thanking the author on.my.knees for the spin-off!

so.

after watching the anime I fled to ao3, of course. read some works about Rin and Isagi, managed to not spoil myself anything.

then i read the U20 arc. after reading every ryusae I could find (writing one myself rn, doing god's work) I finished to read the manga cause, yk, I wanted to know what would happen with my babies and then boom! Reo and Nagi!!!

I didn't particularly care about them at first: Nagi was strong ofc, but kind of boring? he's not my favourite archetype, and while I loved Reo I hated their fight and wanted nothing to do with them. key word(s), at first.

then, then! I randomly read some fics about them cause they'd started to grow on me, and boom, tons of fics about their breakup/makeup. stunning works, ofc, but I started to see so many "Reo's fault" "Nagi's fault" "toxic relationship" that I kind of started to get uncomfortable (sometimes people throw around the word toxic when it's nothing like that), so what's to do? read the spin off ofc.

that I did, and now not only I love them both with all of my heart, but I'm Reo's number one fan (and kinnie)!

and I developed a deep hatred for those "toxic x" theories and takes. SO. let me blabber and rant.

they love each other so much!!

this is Nagi.

he thinks "damn, soccer/football is a pain, I hate sweating and running, but I don't hate Reo" even though most of the time he spends with Reo is spent playing soccer/football (I won't choose one english is so confusing- in italian it's literally called kick).

he doesn't feel forced to be Reo's friend, he likes it.

because Reo loves him, it's as simple as that.

he wants to be Nagi's friend "despite" Nagi's personality: this is something he currently says through the spin-off, which made me cry- Reo truly is the first person who ever accepted Nagi as someone who is lazy and unmotivated, who complains a lot, who doesn't put any effort in what he does, who doesn't offer much.

Or at least he thinks that he doesn't have anything special to offer, until Reo arrives.

he still has those terribly self-deprecating thoughts, but now he has something to offer, his talent.

(and after a period of happiness, their honeymoon phase one could call it, he starts to doubt the sincerity of Reo's care. from thinking "i'm not his slave, i'm his partner" he starts to doubt Reo's honesty: "maybe he only wanted to be my friend because of my talent, a talent he knows how to use"- since he still thinks that he's got nothing to offer! but we will talk about this later.)

this is Reo!

he thinks "I wanted to be the one who could make you love soccer/football, the one able to light up something in you" but he also thinks "seeing you like that, even if it wasn't me who'd done that, made me happy".

he's so jealous he's almost funny, and isn't that the most teenager thing ever?

who wouldn't be jealous after working so hard to be special to someone, just for someone else to take the place you're working so hard for?

it's terrible, but still, it doesn't stop Reo from being happy that Nagi found something exciting.

something that made Nagi as happy as the combo Nagi-soccer/football made Reo happy.

the thing is, Nagi thinks he's Reo's friend because of his talent, which maybe it's true. maybe, hadn't Nagi been a genius, they wouldn't have become friends, but his talent was the sparkle that made him become Reo's treasure.

Reo is someone who has everything, who gets everything he wants, or as he says everything except what he really wants.

for that, he has to work.

so, what he wants is to play soccer/football, and to play it with Nagi.

(in order to be Nagi's friend, he needs to work hard, because he needs to be honest and gain Nagi's trust- this is how friendship works: even when it seems flawless and easy, there's so much work behind it, and knowing it is important. most of the times we only realise it once we lost that bond- for example, Nagi. Reo already knew it, and this is why he tried so hard to not leave Nagi's side)

at one point, the two things became linked to one another, and his dream turns into "winning with Nagi, my partner". Because Nagi is talented, is special, and Reo saw his talent, and how Nagi was unable to do the same. He wants to show Nagi that soccer/football is fun, that his talent isn't a pain, that he is special, because Nagi doesn't know it, and for Reo a star that doesn't see his its own light? is just preposterous.

He cares for Nagi and loves everything about him, even all the "bad" things, and he doesn't think that Nagi has to change, and this is what, for me, makes their break-up way more serious and relatable for a lot of people.

it triggers a "I'll change to be better" "for me you never had to change" "I need to change for myself" dynamic.

2. changing and longing is way more fun when you're doing it together!!!

so they split up.

Nagi doesn't do it because he likes Isagi more, or because his style of play is more interesting, he does it because Isagi was stronger than Nagi and Reo: entering Blue Lock, Nagi had trust in Reo's ability to use his talent to win, he didn't even think about failing, and while Barou came close to making him feel like he could loose, Nagi overpowered him at the end- but then Isagi beats Nagi, and Reo with him.

Nagi understands that Reo's dream can't become reality if they aren't the strongest, and if being together doesn't work, maybe they should split up, part ways, become stronger and then join forces again, and win everything. win the world cup.

while his friendship with Isagi is sweet and I love them, for Nagi Isagi is like a cyclette.

he'll use the cyclette to get get fit and make his bf swoon over his legs, he won't stay with the cyclette once he doesn't need the training anymore. and even if he will, it will always be just the cyclette he uses to get fit "for" his bf.

(metaphor isn't metaphoring)

Reo doesn't know that.

he knows he's strong, but he knows that Isagi and Nagi are on a whole other level and he feels threatened. he fears that Nagi will choose Isagi instead of him, and he tries desperately to not loose Nagi.

Nagi is his dream. Slowly, day after day, Nagi became part of his dream, and now he's losing not only his best friend but the dream that made him free.

Reo says it himself- he knows that Nagi did the smartest thing by leaving, but he's young and scared and sees it as Nagi leaving him.

He feels abandoned, and he thinks that Nagi is abandoning his dream to go with the bigger fish, the apex predator, in order to become the best striker, by forgetting the promises they made at the start of Blue Lock, to stay together til the end.

Neither of them forgets the other.

Nagi leaves, and all he thinks about it "I need Reo to see this" "I can't wait to let him see how much I've improved", and he misses Reo, just as much as Reo misses him.

the only difference?

Reo is oblivious about Nagi's real feelings and thought process, and his thinking of Nagi turns into spiraling into depression and self-hatred.

so Nagi changes.

he starts to see the beauty in soccer/football, he finally sees what Reo had tried to make him see for months, and he's thrilled. he's having fun. he's grateful that Reo convinced him to not discard Blue Lock immediately. he's different.

different why? because Isagi beat him? because Blue Lock happened?

he changed not when Isagi beat them, but the moment he became Reo's friend, and found a reason to do something.

because Reo was the first person to ever tell him that his laziness, boredom, his oh so troublesome antics were alright, that he was what he was, and he was enough not only for Reo, but for the whole world.

Reo accepted him even when he was set on being static, made him want to change, and now that he's changing he feels worthy of being loved so much.

"you saw something in me back then, you forced to me work hard, and now thanks to you I ('m on my way to) realised my own worth, now I found something exciting"

he changes.

Reo sees him after what, a few days, and he's already improved so much.

and he thinks that he was Nagi's cage, his personal dead weight, that Nagi may have been his treasure but he wasn't Nagi's. that Nagi doesn't need him anymore. if Nagi doesn't need him, what will be of his dream?

(we could start a long-ass post ab mental health and recovering but I won't for my own sanity)

what's his worth then, since he got into Blue Lock just to stay with Nagi till the end- especially when he can't even be number two, with Isagi there- and Nagi won't be with him anymore?

he needs to change too.

3. destroying yourself in order to change (no fun)

Reo says that he isn't brave enough to destroy himself like the others do.

Isagi, Barou, Nagi, Chigiri, they all destroy themselves in order to become stronger and change, evolve, but Reo can't. he's scared, he's confused, the whole arc is just him looking like that. then what does he do?

he lets Nagi destroy him. "If I can't do it, Nagi will" don't you understand you're doing exactly what you say you're unable to do? the fact that you're not the one pulling the trigger doesn't mean that you're not killing yourself

he pushes Nagi until he snaps and tells Reo to fuck off, that he's a pain, that he's weak and someone Nagi doesn't want anything to do with, because that's what Reo thinks.

He thinks Nagi doesn't want to be with him anymore, he's feeling guilty for what he thought (later later), he's insecure- and instead of being reasonable, he founds a way to confirm his "irrational" fears.

"I'm not being insecure since Nagi confirmed it"

he sabotages himself. that's the nail in the coffin.

instead of destroying himself with football/soccer, by learning from a lost match, he destroys himself with life, by putting on the line his relationship with the person he (not exaggerating) loves most in the world.

he's unable to distinguish life from soccer/football (and this will be the aspect that makes him so different from most of the other characters), because since meeting Nagi they've become one thing. soccer/football is his life, Nagi is his life, because they're his only chance at being happy.

(Nagi is able to distinguish between the court and Reo: this way, Reo is just as special as Isagi is, since Isagi may have made him see the fun in soccer/football, but Reo made him get angry. Nagi who thinks that his strong quality is the fact he never gets angry, that he's a pacifist. Isagi is his soccer/football revolution, Reo is his life revolution.

Reo can't. they all insult each other on the field, but they're all friends afterwards. not Reo. not yet)

now he's lost Nagi, and his dream, and he has to pick himself up from the ground.

this is how Reo changes.

4. miscommunication is a beast

As I said before, Nagi starts to think that Reo only cared about him because of his talent. he's angry at Reo. he doesn't understand why Reo said those things, why he was so stupid, why he didn't understand Nagi.

he says "I'm not his toy" and he isn't, but really, try to get into his shoes.

he thinks his partner, his best friend, doesn't believe in them as a duo anymore, doesn't want to believe in them like he used to now that Nagi has changed, now that he's more "independent" from Reo.

"what, now that I know how to fight alone, he doesn't want me anymore?" that would be anyone's first thought.

and he doubts Reo's trust in their dream.

when did Reo start to have so little faith in them, in Nagi? when did he give up on them? he thinks that, after spending weeks trying to improve just to make Reo's dream true.

and he's angry, but he still hopes to play with Reo again.

he still want to, because him and Reo are partners and Nagi still believes in their dream. because he remembers Reo's passion, and he believes in him.

+) 5. being relatable as fuck

(what kid with absent/abusive parents never thought back on their action and went anxiously all "Am I just like them?")

Reo begs Nagi to stop being so strong, stop improving so quickly, stop running towards a place Reo can't reach yet, and isn't this a human thing to do? He desperately wants to be with Nagi, and thinks that he'd rather stop him from improving rather than lose him. He thinks "Please, give up on your dream, your ego"- and isn't that familiar?

he just thought the same thing his father, a man he hates and despises and who doesn't believe in Reo, told him. and he said that to Nagi. Nagi who gave him a ticket to the top by being at his side, who let him see hope.

he panics. am I just like him? Am I cruel enough to wish for someone to give up on their dreams, just to get something out of their failure?

he's different from his father, because he's seventeen, he's scared to lose his best friend, and we can be irrational in situations like this one. does he know it? no, the same way he doesn't understand that Nagi didn't left because of him.

so yes, he's in the worst head-space ever.

isn't he relatable? this is what that made reo my favourite character in a second, probably. he's so human and he makes so many mistakes and he's so stupid sometimes, but I can see myself in him very clearly.

and now.

in what way is their relationship not balanced? their love and care not mutual? in what way one used or manipulated the other?

I think they're flawed, and they made mistakes, and they hurt each other, but I also think that we throw in the word "toxic" the moment a relationship isn't perfect.

they're friends and they're teens, they will make mistakes and they will hurt each other, and their friendship (and they were roommates) won't be perfect- this doesn't make it less genuine or beautiful.

don't get me started on what happens in the manga (really don't do it) (all of this was just nagi's spin off!!!)

[whiteobsidian]

loa guide (again), no borax, no glue

loa guide w/ a lot of examples

what is loa?

all you need to know ▶️ “whatever you seem to be true is true”

ex. “I'm always late” , “my boss is mean” “I'm so unlucky” “I'm bad at this”

 what you assume is what you will experience.  they can be instantaneous or gradually persisted in overtime.  like the belief “good things take time” or immediately disliking someone because of your ‘intuition’

 the good thing is assumptions change all the time and you can change them consciously!

 instead of assuming your boss is mean you can start assuming they are nice.  the world / reality has to reflect what you assume,  a confirmation bias based on what you’re constantly thinking.

there isn't a definite logical reason (there are some ‘theories’ but loa is not entirely logical) as to why assumptions create reality. we can argue a lot of our assumptions are purely based on how we feel or know with no evidence 

ex.  knowing you aced a test without seeing the grade,  assuming a person is mean when you haven't even met them before or you knowing your favorite sports team will win a match even though it looks like they’ll lose. 

assumptions v. feelings

so in essence mind/thoughts = reality this does not mean doubts / feelings = reality.  you are not your feelings, you are not your doubt you are what you assume to be or identify

 ex. “I am sad”

 you are feeling an emotion, but you are not the emotion 

ex. “I can never get what I want”

 you are assuming / identifying as someone here.  so when you say “I'm scared I won't get what I want” you're just scared. like I said feelings does not equal assumptions.

to make a new assumption you just start identifying/assuming you have what you want.  now assuming a new identity is easy and instant. you always change identities in everyday life.

 ex.  “my hair is easy to maintain”, “cooking is hard work”,  “reading is fun”,  “I'm a good at this”, “I'm bad at this”, etc etc

 when you shift your identity, reality follows. the world will start showing evidence to match your identity. of course shifting may be hard for some people because they want evidence first before assuming any identity, but that's not how it works.  fortunately everything stems from your mind and whatever you consistently persist in or assume reality will give you proof of. 

reality must match what you assume. Your brain has confirmation bias, so it filters the world to reflect what you believe over and over again.

you give meaning

when you make assumptions based on what you see and hear that is not evidence that your assumption is entirely true (bear with me here). what you see, hear, or experience is not objective truth. it’s a reflection of your assumptions, and the meaning you attach to it is what creates your next experience. think of reality like clay, it takes the shape of your own beliefs.

ex. you see a video of a man being an asshole to his girlfriend.  you then start assuming guys are terrible, men always cheat, romance is that etc etc. you start seeing evidence of this because you assumed that guys are terrible.  maybe you get into a relationship and your boyfriend is awful or you start seeing guys being terrible more in person.  in reality that video you watched is just a video.  it has no meaning,  but you gave it meaning and based on what you saw, you made an assumption. but that video is not evidence of anything. your assumption made it mean something, and then reality followed you. 

more examples? 

you get a text from your crush that feels cold? you could assume: “they’re not interested.” or you could assume: “they’re just busy and I’m still irresistible.”

same text. different assumption. different outcome.

a college rejects your application? you could spiral: “I’m not smart enough.” or you could stand firm: “they made a mistake, a glitch. i actually got it in, full ride and everything.” 

how to assume?

“okay so cyra how do I assume in my favor?” easy just decide whatever you want now is truth and by law evidence will be shown to prove your assumption is correct.

 ex. ‘I want a car’ this is a desire

“I have/own a car” this is an assumption, you’ve now changed your identity from someone who wants a car to someone who has one. 

if you persist in the assumption ▶️ evidence will be given that you have that car

if you go back and forth in identity ▶️ reality will show you that you don't have a car 

REMEMBER DESIRE =/= ASSUMPTION!

ex. desire: “I want to be accepted to college.” assumption: “I’m already enrolled. I go there. It’s mine.”

ex. desire: “I want clear skin.” assumption: “My skin is healthy, glowing, perfect.”

ex. desire: “I want to meet my SP.” assumption: “my person is obsessed with me. we’re already together.”

stand firm in your identity and the world will instantly reflect and show you that.

time?

 “okay so cyra I get it, what about time?” what about it? “well I want it now but it's not here.” because you decided it's not here, silly.

 Everything is in your control if you understand how the law works, even time.

 you want it now? decide you have it now.  you want it tomorrow?  decide you’ll get it tomorrow. time is an illusion? you're right it is now. 

 assume time is forever in your favor. assume time works to please you. 

 you only assume delay or waiting,  decide those things do not exist, decide it now. 

and watch how reality works to please you! 

methods?

 methods are fun, don't forget that. they are tools and you don't necessarily need them  to get what you want. I personally enjoy making affirmation tapes and listening when I'm bored or crocheting. sometimes I use Pinterest or do inner conversations. 

do what you want not, not what someone else does or what you think will guarantee results. every method guarantees results. 

 just like cooking there are multiple ways to cook rice, steak, and even spaghetti. there isn't one perfect way to cook these meals. Some have their preferences, some add other ingredients. but in the end you're still going to eat rice, steak and that spaghetti. so there is no wrong way to manifest because in the end you're getting what you want, your way. 

 tl;dr

your assumptions shape your world around you

you can change your assumptions at any time.

feelings =/= reality. assumptions = reality.

you don’t need evidence to assume, validate yourself.

time is on your side.

reality is neutral, you assign the meaning.

you’re the operant power. you get to decide what’s true for you.

You tell the 3D world what to show you.

Evidence follows assumptions, not the other way around.

neutral moments become meaningful based on what you assume.

xx,cyra

[elliesglock]

AMARI LIVE ANALYSIS

okay hey bitches. again redoing my analyses so today we're doing on of my ogs. THE amari live. now this live is packed with details that are not super visible but if you pay attention you'll get rewarded. a lot of anons have asked me to put time stamps in my analyses so i shall from now on.

live begins and we see the arrangement of the beds. ice and ines on the bed, amari on the floor in front of the bed, and paige/azzi laying on the second bed. i wanna start off this analysis with one of my more delusional theories. lemme preface and say i have no idea who's room this was but in my head it was either p or azzi's. why do i believe this? in the beginning in the back you can say azzi's under the covers with her bonnet on. and in azzi universe that's bed time wear. she looks completely relaxed and it seems that she's obviously sharing this room with someone else. it could be paige's as well but either way azzi looks comfortable like as soon as they leave and end this live she'll STAY in that bed and probably not sleep 👀. either her and paige are gonna cuddle because they're already in that mode in this live or they're gonna spend some more time off camera before they have to go to their own rooms. just a little theory of mine, i'll prob come back to this a few times when i'm mentioning things that could prove this.

this whole live you can kinda tell azzi's still in that sleepy mode and every time p yells she looks way closer to a meltdown. not that dramatic but she looks so over it at times. which i get because this whole live paige is up and down, yelling, screaming acting like an ipad kid over lebron. and amari WILL not stop being messy with the comments which azzi is listening to and really not fucking w. at 5:53 we see paige yelling and screaming as usual, but when she goes back to the bed she's facing azzi and almost looking like she wants to lay on her. and she kinda does for a second imo. azzi prob gave her a face after she was yelling and she decided to calm down and cuddle her to say sorry for a second. the way her body language is when she sits down is almost like she's checking up on azzi cause her WHOLE body is turned to her when she sits down and her eyes are on her. usually turning your body towards someone shows a preoccupation with them. and when she lays down her leg comes up and her hips shift almost like she's rolling or laying on azzi 🥀. i'm so sorry girl ik that hurts. and lemme just say before i blow up the way they are acting this whole live is so coupley and IM OBSESSED. azzi getting annoyed, p being touchy as a sorry, paige rolling and laying all over her knowing she'd get yelled at if they weren't on camera. it's so coupley. during this time, amari's ass is so messy and reads out a comment that says "amari has a bf and paige has a gf." and i like to acknowledge ice because she can't hide her face and unfortunately becomes evidence all the time for pazzi nation. she very quickly goes "PAIGE DOESMT HAVE A GF" not even acknowledging the amari part. now it's hard to differentiate if it's because she sees a couple in front of her and paige's girlfriend and guiltily tries to lie terribly by just blurting that out, or if paige and azzi aren't together yet and she don't want anything to be started saying that...me personally i don't think pazzi were every acting different with or without the labels. so the second theory kinda doesn't matter to me. pazzi has always acted like a couple even when they weren't together, that was their problem. they were invested and from first glance had intimate tendencies while not being together. idk it's whatever yall wanna think about it i would love to hear your opinions. to me ice sounds really guilty and like she's trying to hide something. after this 6:11 p starts talking to az really softly for a moment and it might be her checking up on her again. that's how i feel. i feel like she's focused on her and talking to her to keep an eye. we know p's very perceptive to azzi and also protective.

also during this ice and amari but seem tense and start watching the camera, most likely because p and a are doing something in the back. 6:43 paige and azzi aren't involved in the convo between ice and ines, they're having their own convo most likely little spat. paige goes "azzi....are you serious? we can't do that." paige reveals that azzi wants her to play a game after ice kinda starts staring at them. it's such a cute thing to argue about. azzi wants to play with her girl and paige is like babe but lebron's on. 7:00-7:05 it seems like paige calms down and goes back to being occupied with azzi during the commercial breaks because as soon as the game comes back on she jumps from the bed and tells everyone to lock in. jus so domestic that when she's not watching she just wanna lay and talk to her girl. even though her girl wants her to play a game during lebron's legacy game. now if paige didn't wanna look nonchalant for the camera she'd DEF fold and play with az. who can resist? 7:22 now why tf this girl go back to azzi and kinda look like she sits on top

of her and starts teasing her. paige sorta starts cooing at her and almost sounds like she says "she so cuteeeee" maybe making fun of her pouting, and azzi responds "don't laugh at me" in a VERY pouty voice so idk the streets are saying p was smiling and teasing az for being pouty. idk how to describe it but p seems like teasy flirty in this live. i wanna say dom but im not trying to get sniped so teasy flirty it is. her energy gives she wants to squeeze azzi's cheeks and make fun of her for how cute she is. she acts like this when she gets back to the bed and it almost seems like she leans down in azzi's face and teases her some more. maybe azzi is still pouty but gets blushy? u can hear a little smile in azzi's voice. 7:25 ice clocks it and looks over probably seeing pazzi being cuddly and close to one another. so when amari looks back, ice looks at her as a sort of warning. therefore, amari shifts herself so she's covering pazzi. that just tells me they looked close enough to almost kissing each other or they were being flirty and ice wanted to make sure they were covered from cameras view. paige eventually locks back in and goes back to watching but i find it so cute she was obv very invested in the game but MUCH MORE invested in her girl at the end of the day. ice is still a little nervous obv because anytime paige moves she looks back to make sure she doesn't have to signal amari again. ice i can read ur mind pookie.

8:53 azzi says move! she's so over her but that's her girl and she's gonna stick beside her. guess all those apology cuddles from p went out the door the minute p stood back up cause paige doesn't even care anymore 🥀. 10:53 azzi says shush i'm trying to hearwhen p is talking. at times like this i feel like azzi is the only one who can talk to p like this cause ive never seen p BE QUIET when she's told to be quiet. like she don't even listen to geno but by god she's going to listen to her girl. mouth shuts too quick and ines almost seems like she wants to laugh at her parents. paige looks like a kicked puppy and keeps looking back at azzi afterwards. she's like bae you always let me yap whatttt 💔. but azzi is just princess to everyone cause she says be quiet EVERYBODY quiets down oooo that's a bad bitch. paige knows she got a baddie too cause she always listens to az. somebody in the comment says "yall afraid of azzi? nobody even on that bed with her..." which is so true because not even clingy ass PAIGE is with her so she knew her girl meant business. (16:14) amari is talking about the comments and saying how when azzi said shut up they all did. and paige pipes up (cause she's also the only one allowed to do this) and says because of lebron not because of azzi! u sure about that twin? ur voice is shaking a bit. also she was screaming when lebron was on so YES obv you shut up because of azzi u damn liar. final moment, we get the legendary moment where amari is being messy AGAIN (this is becoming a theme) where she reads and says "Paige someone is going to take you out to breakfast" and azzi is over ittttttttt. she said take my girl where??? she says "better not" in this tone that can be so easily spotted as jealousy. she genuinely is not fucking w the idea of someone having dates or wanting her girl at all. jealous azzi agenda come home we miss you in this drought. she's gotten more subtle with her menacy behavior but she will NOT allow anyone to hit on paige and ive always felt if someone tried to hit on her she'd be blunt asf and say that's my girlfriend btw.

kinda not edited at all sorry guys i'll go back and edit it. but it's longer than my original, happy reading! lmk your thoughts

[homano222]

No Coriolanus Snow was not “pure evil” from the beginning of the ballad. And yes he was capable of love and empathy. But that makes him so, so much scarier.

LONG time lurker and first time poster here and I’m aware the hype for TBOSAS is wayy past but ive seen a lot of conflicting takes and thought id share what I gathered from not only the books but also an interview Suzanne Collins did about TBOSAS that I dont see many people talk about in their interpretations. Interview is the scholastic interview from 2020.

So yes, Snow is bad, Im a long time book fan so going into the ballad I was fully aware of who he was going into. But something I found really interesting at the beginning of the book was the quote from Mary shelley’s Frankenstein

"I thought of the promise of virtues which he had displayed on the opening of his existence, and the subsequent blight of all kindly feeling by the loathing and scorn which his protectors had manifested towards him." 

I think this quote, paired with Collin’s mention of tabula rasa:

“When I read it, I'm reminded of Locke's tabula rasa, or blank slate, theory, in which all we know comes from experience, as well as of Rousseau's state-of-nature human beings, who were capable of pity and compassion. She seems to be saying that naturally good creatures exposed to an abusive world result in monsters. You can apply that to Frankenstein, Coriolanus, or anyone you choose.”

Allows us to conclude that no, Coriolanus was not simply “born evil” he is instead very much a product of his upbringing. In fact, if we’re going with her thoughts, he like everybody, is “naturally good”. Witnessing horrors in war and also being fed capitol propaganda his whole life has led him to believe that the control and power the capital has over the districts is the only way to ensure order. And that when people are desperate or ungoverned, they will do terrible things. He sees Nero Price cut the leg off a maid to feed his family, and subsequently believes this is humanities natural state. I could go into how Collins works to reject this belief system through the use of Locke and Rousseau but honestly I might make a separate post about that.

Point is, Snow has a very negative outlook on humanity, but he was not born that way. He was made that way.

Now, as Collins states in the interview, upbringing is not an inherit excuse for behavior but it is a good explanation of why he has his initial cynism. You cant completely excuse his behavior because you need to leave room for his actions.

“But given all that, you still need to leave room for Snow's personality. Is a he a product of nature or nurture? Everyone of his generation experienced trauma, loss, and deprivation. And yet Sejanus, Tigris, Lucy Gray, and Lysistrata turned out very differently.”

So from the beginning of the book we are introduced to a young, starving Coriolanus with this viewpoint on the world. So naturally, hes going to be an asshole.

He views vulnerability and empathy as weakness, he is obsessive as states in text. But again I dont think this makes him inheritably evil from the beginning. Yes he has some troubling thoughts, I see this one talked about often:

“He thought of people putting a price on her. With her long, pointed nose and skinny body, Tigris was no great beauty, but she had a sweetness, a vulnerability that invited abuse. She would find takers, if she had a mind to. The idea made him feel sick and helpless and, consequently, disgusted with himself.“

Now, this is not a good thing to think about. But no, i dont think he “wanted to sell his cousin” a take i see mentioned a lot?? Hes disgusted at the thought but because he grew up in a society that he believes takes advantage of those who are “weak” he views his cousins “vulnerability” as something that would cause people to harm her. This is not a good viewpoint by any means and in my opinion it appears he is almost blaming victims for their “weakness” but within the context of his upbringing, this is the conclusion he draws, its not inherently malicious, just merely Collins solidifying that Coriolanus finds empathy and vulnerability to be something that can be used against somebody.

Now despite his beliefs i would argue that yes, he does experience love and empathy throughout the ballad. He experiences conflicted emotions after Arachne’s death:

“In the near scalding water of the shower, he scoured the remainder of Arachne’s blood from his body. For a minute a painful sobbing made his chest ache, but then it passed”

I think this is Collin’s way of showing, that yes, Coriolanus can feel empathy but he untimately chooses to suppress it and instead revert back to his cynical worldview, in which he uses Arachne’s death as a tool to allow himself to look better and ultimately states that her funeral was a “ridiculous and out of proportion”. So yeah he can feel empathy but he chooses to suppress it. This is far more complex and honestly more interesting than the take “Snow has no empathy”

Now on to love:

So of course one of the biggest debates in the ballad is the nature of Coriolanus’s feelings toward Lucy gray. And now i would like to state that like many of you, i found their relationship progression to be deeply unsettling. Yes they have their moments but with Coriolanus’s constant thoughts of possesion and his constant undermining of her culture its a very hard read. (Im not going to quote examples of this bc its everywhere in the book lol). Despite this however, I do think in his own way, he did love her. At least the only way he knew how. Not only is it a key part in understanding the nature of his descent into villainy it is also stated by Collins in her interview:

“For whatever reason, Snow has a very controlling personality. Then he experiences one of the most out-of-control emotions, falling in love. It turns out to be a bad combination.”

This sums up the nature of his feelings for her perfectly. Yes he does care about her, though he himself admits initially her wants her to win so he can succeed. He grows to care for her, though it gets twisted because of his need to control every aspect of his life . He genuinely wants her to win, not just for him, but because he cares about her, at least in his own way:

“I’ll be a wreck tomorrow! When I told you that you mattered to me, I didn’t mean as my tribute. I meant as you. You, Lucy Gray Baird, as a person. As my friend. As my —” What was the word for it? Sweetheart? Girlfriend? He could not claim more than a crush, and that might be onesided. But what could he possibly have to lose by admitting she’d gotten to him? “I felt jealous after your ballad, because I wanted you to be thinking about me, not someone from your past. It’s stupid, I know. But you’re the most incredible girl ’ve ever met. Really. Extraordinary in every way.”

Now again. Not glossing over his need to control her, his constant undermining of her culture, and him objectifying her as “his” but even he admits his jealousy was foolish.

And again his attempt to seperate her from the districts, although indirectly more demeaning, and his need for control both come from his idea that he cannot love someone from districts, who stole his upbringing from him and plunged his world into chaos and misery. Not justifying it but his reasoning is there in the text.

So if Collin’s wrote Snow with the capacity for empathy and love. Where did it all go wrong? And why is he still so evil?

Because time and time again, He is given the opportunity to change, to change is viewpoint, to see that no, love and empathy is not weak. Because if it was, how did it fuel the rebellion that ultimately led to his downfall as president?

Time and time again Snow is given choices, and at every turn he chooses himself, power and ultimately Gauls, Hobbes-like worldview i.e people are evil and must be controlled.

Snow is given three examples in his life. Three people who endured pain and trauma. Three people who did not turn out hateful and resentful. Lucy Gray, Sejanus, and Tigris, who notably endured worse than him and yet still maintained her empathy. And again, these are three people who he, at the least, had relationships with. And while him and Sejanus’s was much more one-sided, thats not up for debate I do think Snow cared about him a little more than he let on:

“There’s an empty seat by me.” The words came unbidden from Coriolanus’s mouth. / The offer distracted Sejanus, and then he seemed to deflate. He took a deep breath, walked back down the aisle, and slid onto the stool.”

As he says himself, those words come unbidden. Almost as if on instinct, as if subconsciously he wants to help him. Again their relationship is very onesided but I do think its more complex than Snow wants to let on. But honestly to unpack all of it is another post in itself and this one is already super long.

So yeah Snow does, at least a little, cares about these people. Its what makes his betrayal of them so much worse. He knows them, he listens to them tell him that the worlds not all evil, that humans have a natural goodness, that they see the goodness, even if its small, in him. And yet he chooses Dr. Gaul. He chooses power and stability over love and nature.

And that is what makes him a monster. Not that “oh hes an asshole in the beginning so surely hes just predestined to be an asshole!” No. He has every opportunity to love, he even understands it! And yet he chooses to cut it out and weaponize it.

And this is what makes him so evil in the original trilogy and SOTR. He knows how out of control love is, he knows how it feels to be vulnerable, to love someone. And yet, because he views it as weakness, he utilizes it as a weapon against Katniss and Haymitch. This is why the ballad is so tragic, he knows what its like to be a lovestruck teen, and yet he goes on to torture people with the same love that could have saved him, had he let it.

TL;DR

Snow is very much a product of his upbringing. It explains his worldview, but it does not justify it. He is capable of love and empathy as stated by both Collin’s in her interview and in the text. But throughout the book, he chooses power and inevitability rejects love, making him evil. This is why hes so evil in SOTR and the original trilogy; he knows what it means to love and fear, he is the original victim of the capitols and Dr. Gauls propaganda, but you stop being a victim once you victimize others. I would also argue that by stating that Snow was “always evil” buys into his and Gauls toxic worldview.

Thanks for reading! Sorry about the long post lol and idk who will see this but these are my thoughts. Im always open to discussion and give me a follow if you want to talk TBOSAS!!

[theliteraryarchitect]

I don’t know if u still answer questions but I need some advice. My passion has always been writing simply because I have so many ideas and so many thoughts and I love creating stories (theoretically). Lately though I’ve hit this roadblock. I’ll never be able to write like the people I admire, because at the end of it all I feel like I’m not learning. I’ll reread my old stuff, point out and rework my mistakes, and still feel like I’m not going anywhere. I haven’t written anything for years because of this block and I feel like I’ll never improve and find the motivation to keep writing. I’ll never be like the greats with seemingly endless inspiration and talent. Ig my question is just… how do I improve? How do I finally feel satisfied with what I do? How do I love my writing again??

First off, I hear you. So many writers—especially the ones who care deeply—go through exactly this. You love storytelling in theory, but when it comes to writing, it feels like you’re stuck in a cycle of self-doubt and disappointment. That’s not a personal failing. That’s just what happens when your standards grow faster than your skills.

The mistake most writers make (and one I see repeated constantly) is thinking that learning = immediate improvement—as if you study the craft, tweak some mistakes, and suddenly level up. But writing doesn’t work like a skill tree in a video game. It’s messy, non-linear, and full of invisible growth. The work you put in today might not show results for months, or even years. And that’s frustrating as hell, but it’s also normal.

And the writers you admire? The ones who seem endlessly inspired and effortlessly talented? They aren’t immune to this feeling. The difference is, they write through it. They let themselves write badly. They embrace inefficiency. They trust that even their worst drafts are part of the process. AND (top secret info here)... frankly a lot of the big names have editors at their publishing houses that are practically doing ghostwriting work: fixing their mistakes, rewriting their stuff, or even composing sections for them so they can pump out the next bestseller in record time.

But here’s my advice: stop waiting to feel satisfied before you start writing again. You’re not going to think your way out of this. Improvement comes from doing. Let yourself write terribly, inconsistently, joyfully. Take the pressure off. And when your brain tells you it’s pointless, remind yourself: the only way to get better is to keep going.

You don’t need to be “one of the greats.” You just need to write.

Hope this helps, friend.

P.S. I get Asks like this so much that I'm actually working on a whole long book about it, since it's really more than I can handle in a short post. Stay tuned for details. xo

[the-boring-distopia]

I love the Locked Tomb series, when the Third were introduced I was seriously thinking that the reason Ianthe was so thin and sick was prion disease. You know, from munching on people. This was one of my original headcanons, I honestly thought I was one step ahead the plot until the finale happened.

Even if it's not the case, I'm still curious how Third necromancers avoid getting it.

This is kind of a theory post but bare with me.

(cw: cannibalism, illness)

There is a prion disease called Kuru that spreads via cannibalism, especially by eating the brain. But there are other prion diseases that a person can get infected with and they spread by consumption of meat or coming into contact with an infected animal. In this post we assume that the most common of these diseases in the Locked Tomb universe would be Kuru, because of all that cannibalism, we can also assume that it can be inherited from the mother.

This would have heavy and fairly interesting social consequences on the Third:

There is not really a treatment. If you get it, you have it, forever - unless the necromancers found a solution in the last ten thousand years. But even if they did invent a cure, being a cavalier and having it is probably a career ender, because no necromancer would risk catching an illness that could destroy their brain on top of being physically weak and frail. That means that people who have it are most likely shunned or avoided, depending on how authorian Ida is the individuals might be restricted or marked in a database. It can be passed down from mother to child and the nine houses care a lot about health and genetics, it's not impossible that they might limit an individuals ability to have children if they are infected.

Prion diseases are difficult to keep track of because they have a long incubation period when the host does not experience any troubles, and then it's either long, consistent decay or instant critical condition. It's kind of like rabies in a sense that preventing it is the first line of defense. In a society where a large number of people regularly consume human tissues there are probably insane regulations. With necromancy almost being a religious ritual there is probably a body in the government that tracks cav-necro pairs and runs tests on them regularly to make sure they are healthy. Wanna go to space? Health check. You wish to join the royal guard? Health check. You just arrived from the sixth and hope to see the Idan library? You guessed it: quarantine and health check.

The main danger of prion diseases is mental decline, brain problems, memory loss, seizures and loss of motor control. Statistically a number of necromancers would get it despite the regulations, and they would experience Alzheimers like symptoms, insomnia, terrible headaches and their self-regulatory systems shutting down (no longer feeling hungry or tired because of brain damage). Human society has a terrible track record with mental illness, we did things to people in the past that are worse than death. How would a society like Ida deal with a crisis of their necromancers (and most likely their children) deteriorating into corpses? Would there be care homes? Institutions? Would they be declared a danger and "disposed of"? This would also make every necromancer from Ida suspicious to other houses where this kind of cannibalism is not common: they are a liability. Imagine the stress of being a necromancer from Ida and getting a terrible headache one morning, you feel groggy and slow, and instead of knowing this is one of those days you fear for your life because what if you somehow got infected? What if someone poisoned you? If you have political opponents, it's not even that far off. The government can probably accuse you of showing symptoms and remove you from the public eye, forever, if you speak up against them.

And as a last thing: with the risks listed, the whole thing is probably not worth it, unless Jod somehow gave them magical immunity against it. It would cost money, time, resources to test all these people when the simpler solution is just, not eating the flesh of other people? Hair and nails are probably fine, but flesh? No.

In conclusion, cannibalism is a perfect metafor for supressed lesbian yearning but from a technical standpoint it would be a pain in the ass.

[telugxrl13]

i said i would talk about shatter me and why i'm choosing not to continue the series, so lets get one with it. . . . . . . . . . . .

what i already knew before reading:

warner's first name is aaron

juliette and warner end up together

warner and adam are "friends"

kenji ends up with someone named nazeera

warner was abused as a child

warner had a dog named dog (@imanidiotforu told me this one)

uhh and that's it, i had zero idea of the plot or genre or anything before diving into this book. and i have to say, if i lived in their futuristic society, i would die from not the lack of food but the lack of books 😢 i do wish i had learned more about the book in general rather than basing my ideas off of the little theories lol.

ok why im not finishing the series:

i hate warner. so so much. im chill with a guy who murders people, thats a given in fantasy. i hate him because i hate men who hurt women and say they're protecting them. i hate men who manipulate women to do what they want them to do. i hate men who persuade women into letting them touch them without their actual consent. i hate men who are so egoistical that they think they can control their women. i hate men who misinterpret love as control and power over women. i hate how men who treat women like inanimate objects or compare them to food 'cause ew. i won't judge you guys for being head-over-heels for him because he's obviously not a static character in this series, but i don't care about how he has "a soft side" and "a traumatic past". because none of that excuses this in my mind.

adam is an amazing boyfriend to juliette. so i don't want to read how he becomes evil or dies, or they have conflicting interests where juliette sides with warner, or juliette just confesses to loving warner. i know their relationship is "too good to be true", meaning they're practically destined to break up. i still don't want to read the destruction of what seems like a much healthier relationship than warner and juliette.

kenji's character pisses me off too. i hate how he's so insistent on making juliette feel uncomfortable and catcalling her even after learning that adam and juliette are together. he's like one of those icky guys in my grade who sexualizes every girl he sees in the hallways. he's so unserious about everything and just ugh. him protecting james doesn't counter that. and i was kinda upset that the one asian character in this book (that i remember) acted like THIS. im proud of juliette for defending him when the others shortened his last name, though. (kishimoto is not at all hard to pronounce 😭)

for some reason, i didn't feel like i was uncovering hidden secrets when castle explained his secret movement. i wasn't shocked that kenji was a spy for them, because i knew nothing about kenji in the first place. wow juliette isn't the only person with powers...oh well? im not sure why i didn't feel much for these scenes, but i dont want to continue the series if all my reactions are going to be like this.

i've heard some things about nazeera and i can't bear to read another terribly-written muslim character. no comment, if you know, you know.

i have no idea where the series is headed. like, zero. juliette found people like her...now what? are they going to hide out till warner busts them? or is there actually something going on here? im not really curious, more like confused. the book ended on a flat scene and it didnt exactly make me eager to find out what comes next. this series is a big commitment and i don't want to commit when im not interested.

[red-dye40]

LOOK EVERYONE BEE'S MAKING ANOTHER LONG TEXT POST!

LET'S ALL READ IT AND REALLY REALLY ABSORB EVERY LAST WORD!

Hello, it's me, Bee. I'm typing with proper capitalization to show you how serious this post is.

Recently, and especially yesterday, I've been getting increasingly upsetting and alarming engagement from fans (it feels stupid saying "fans" but also maybe my overfamiliarity is part of what's biting me in my huge ass.)

I am always of the mindset of letting people do their freak shit, never yucking anyone's yum, etc etc, but I think I have to start being a lot more explicit about where I stand on some things.

First of all, I want to specify upfront that Newfag Runs The Gauntlet is a work of fiction, and what's more, it's very explicit social commentary. You are Not supposed to root for Newf. He is purposefully Not A Good Person. That goes for pretty much everyone in NFRTG in fact; like, yes the CrowdSauce posts are funny and ridiculous, but if you find yourself reading some of the more violent and disturbing parts of those threads and being like "woah that's just like me!" then I urge you to understand that it's not a Good thing.

NFRTG isn't written to be representation for paraphiles or radqueers. I in fact do not use either of those terms to describe myself, because I personally am deeply uncomfortable with how broad and vague and muddy the definitions are, and how it invites and potentially encourages some really unsavory behavior. NFRTG is a cautionary tale first and foremost. It's a horror novel because it is SCARY how willingly all these characters agree to ruin people's lives for a laugh. It's also FUNNY because I am very funny :) and it's HOT and you can think it's HOT because I do! And definitely write parts of it to be hot and horny! That's part of the horror, too! Not knowing whether you're disturbed or disgusted or aroused! But please please please know that these characters are Not the good guys. There are really no good guys to be found. Intentionally. And that's not a Good Thing.

I'm going to take a big big BIG step back from fandom engagement for my own sake. There inevitably comes a point where creators kind of can't afford to keep up intense fan engagement and I think I'm there, so I'm gonna untrack my tags and let you all have your fun without mommy breathing down your neck. If you want me to see something, you can tag me or submit it to the site for sure! I WANT to see your art and writing and theories and all that! I LOVE it! I just don't think I need to be privy to ALL of it.

My closing remark is I am so grateful and so lucky to have gotten such a following so fast. Pretty much everyone I've interacted with has been very kind and sweet and curious, and I so admire that. What a lucky little bug I am! I want to keep feeling positively about my work and the impact it's having on others, so I urge everyone to approach NFRTG with a critical eye, understand that I am very much Pointing Out A Problem when I write characters doing or saying terrible things, understand that I very much Don't want people to kill themselves or each other, that I don't think these behaviors are just things we should turn our backs to. I was once a deeply suicidal, nihilistic, self-entitled channer who frequented gore sites and watched awful shit for fun. That was not good, and it took years of therapy for me to even START to unpack that and crawl out of that hole of self destruction. But I'm so much happier and healthier and better off now that I'm away from all that, and I will always encourage people to do the same. I really really would prefer it if people stayed alive and helped themselves and didn't harm others. That is my ask.

Thank you for your reading and I love you and I LIKE you. Please be safe and good :)

[quitealotofsodapop]

Macaque doesn't ever come face to face with Wu until after New Years, something MK had sort of intentionally did. Look, in his defense, it hadn't been the first time soemone had mistaken his Uncle Wu for the Monkey King (see the Calabash episode) and he didn't want to risk Macaque attacking his uncle for no good reason because he thought he was someone was wasn't, he wasn't dumb enough to not realize that Macaque would do something rash based on what he did when he thought MK had connections to the real Great Sage!

After New Years, however, Wu is revealed to have been Sun Wukong this entire time. And after being convinced to stay by weaponized puppy dog eyes form MK and a pleading Sandy telling him they love him legend or no legend during Sleep Bug, Wu had been dealing with a lot of fuss and harassment from the demons who'd been in the spider web with him, the Demon Bull Family included (albeit they weren't really HARASSING him moreso not leaving him alone after father and son eavesdropped on why he disappeared and how he felt he being Sun Wukong was akin to being a monster). So Tang comes up with the idea of seeing a shadow play. The room would be dark, nobody would see anyone else in the crowd, and it'd give Wu a chance to just relax and enjoy himself.

Unfortunately, the person doing the play happened to ve the person the most obsessed with the Monkey King, and he recognizes him in the crowd.

I'm just thinking of Macaque brooding after his attempt to draw Wukong out in his debut episode failed - only to overhear a certain pair of horned demons bouncing conspiracy theories off one another. Turns out having your former-mentor's nutty kids around doesn't leave much room for silence.

Macaque finds the twins in the theatre's prop room discussing over a large cork board containing MK's and multiple peoples' photographs. There's drawing attached to each photo, seemingly ripped from books.

Jin: "What about the cook? He seems to be both the Monkie Kid's dad and his boss?" Yin: "Must be like when we work for mum." Jin, nodding: "Ah, true. Why hire staff when you got perfectly good kids right there? But then again, wouldn't that make him the Pig Kid?" Macaque, makes presence known: "What are you two doing?" Jin & Yin: (*jump a little at seeing the shadow monkey emerge from the shadows*) Yin: "'Ello bruv!" Jin: "Ever since we tried capturing the Monkie Kid in the Dream Calabash, we've been thinking lots." Macaque, snarking: "An extreme sport." Jin: "Hardy har." Yin: "Well, we tried recreating the Monkie Kid's uncle in the Calabash, and you know what? He looks an awful lot like The Monkey King!" Macaque, stunned: "...what?" Jin: "Working theory. We actually thought it *was* the Monkey King when we tried making the calabash copy! But the kid didn't see it that way. Kept calling 'im Uncle Wu for some reason." Yin, gesturing to the noodle gang's photos: "So now our theory is that the Monkey King has been in hiding, acting the Uncle to his old bruvs descendants, and choose MK as his successor cus he's the pig's something great-grandson!" Macaque: (*slowly blinks as the sheer weirdness of the theory sinks in. Sees a blurry photograph of someone who is definitely Wukong giving younger MK a piggyback ride*) Jin & Yin: (*look very proud/smug of their detective work*) Macaque: "I need a drink."

Macaque swears he can hear the twins yell "I FECKING KNEW IT!!!" on New Years.

And now the shadow monkey is secretly scaring suitors away from his Wukong like they're cubs all over again.

Macaque tries (key word: tries) to put on a dranatic show to his mate so that he can get it through Wukong's head that no matter how he feels about him in the moment's he's still His.

Then MK stumbles in mid-confession, and panics thonking Macaque is planning an attack!!

Wukong is left more confused, an convinced Macaque hates him more than ever.

Macaque curses MK for having terrible timing.

[puimoo]

My two theories about HUSH 2

Either HUSH 2 is terribly written, or there is more going on under the surface.

My theory is that the Batman in H2SH is either not Bruce but a Thomas Elliot who has developed a split personality and believes he is alternatively Bruce and Hush, or the reverse. Bruce somehow has taken on both personalities and is setting everything up for himself unknowingly - there IS no Hush.

I'm leaning more towards the first option. A few things that jumped out on me that things aren't as they seem:

The missing time from the first chapter when Bruce was offline and no-one could reach him. This is a big smoking gun. This is where either something happens to Bruce, or where he gets 'replaced'.

Bruce is never pulling a gun on Jason and shooting him like that if he's himself, come on. Don't do that to us, writers!

His weird belief that it is all tied to Hush without proper investigation. He's tying it to Hush because he 'knows' on a subconscious level that Hush is involved.

The comment about things being compromised leans a little more towards the Bruce is Hush theory, as others knew things they shouldn't because Bruce-as-Hush shared them.

The very careful wording throughout. For example, Jason never confirms he is working with Hush because he is not. Jason never says he is there to kill the Joker, and he only talks about his death when BRUCE brings it up and makes it deeply personal. Rather than going there to kill the Joker, he's there to save him - and likely to save him from Bruce.

The very weird scene between Barb and Dick, which feels like it came in mid-discussion to deliberately hide what the conversation was actually about before we came in. Barb is weirdly harsh to Dick with the comment where she basically insults Dick and then says that people don't give HER enough credit. We've missed something big here - the tension is pretty damn thick, and I think it ties back to Barb being more concerned about Bruce disappearing than Dick was and them (but not us) now knowing what happened during that time.

The Riddler thinks Bruce needs help. There is something either wrong with Bruce, or he's being held captive somewhere. The reason why different villains get involved during this arc is either because a mad!Bruce is both trying to kill and save them, or a mad!Thomas is trying to do the same.

There is also something very odd about the fact that the batfamily can't connect up with each other and have to work alone, although I am guessing that this is because the communications are now all compromised because Batman has access to them (Whether that is Hush!Batman or Bruce!Batman)

There is also the title. HUSH 2/H2SH feels an unusual name for the sequel, especially given the authors. I think that this is in itself a clue: that there are 2 versions of Hush, or Hush is playing 2 roles. What is also interesting is how they write the 2 in H2SH. Two things here: that the two is hidden within the name Hush (the two personalities in one person angle), but also that the 2 replaces U. This is a Batman comic, the U - or you - is the title character. We go from a singular U to a 2, so, two Batmans :)

Am I trying to make sense of what might just be absolutely terrible writing? Why, yes! But so little in the current world make sense.

[bloodashre]

Sorry to ruin the movie magic for some of you, but it's extremely unlikely that the shots of The Kiss are edited to be longer. Like, a million to one.

How do I know? I'm in school for filmmaking, so I'll share a bit with you.

1. The first reason is the most important. It is very difficult to edit a shot to be longer (and almost never done, especially by professionals) and not have it be obvious. It is painfully obvious, particularly to other filmmakers, when someone does actually do this. I can almost guarantee that if this had happened, other filmmakers in the industry most certainly would have called them out for it. I've personally watched the scene literally thousands of times (I'm not exaggerating) and in my semi-professional opinion (yes, I've already made my own films, though I haven't been paid for any of my work yet), it's not edited to be longer.

2. Nearly as important and launching off the above, it's much more likely - and more easily and actually often done - that it's edited to be shorter.

Additionally, there's no reason to think it would be edited to be longer when it comes to the story. It's unnecessary. The reason it looks so awkward to solve of you is because - newsflash - it IS awkward! It's meant to be awkward!

Aziraphale is caught off guard, during a moment of being about to break down, crying, in the midst of an argument. He was just rejected. He's potentially thought about this moment so many times. It is possible he thought The Metatron was threatening Crowley, which just happened only a few minutes ago! And lastly, there's literally thousands of years of feelings that haven't been spoken aloud - at least not properly, depending which theory you follow.

And there's even more depending which theories you subscribe to that support this even further.

And then, there's the fact that, at least for a moment, he kisses him back. He goes from being surprised, to resistance, to acceptance, to reciprocation, to rejection in a matter of less than 30 freaking seconds - while also portraying all the unspokenness, uncertainty, and fear of 6000 years, as well as a possible threat AND rejection of Crowley refusing to come with him ALL AT THE SAME TIME.

It's so awkward and complicated and terrible - and yet also wonderful - and Michael Sheen is honestly a fucking MASTER for the amount of emotions he's able to portray in such an insanely small amount of time. Please please PLEASE don't reduce his abilities and the beauty of the story to editing some bullshit that any filmmaker with any actual integrity would never do.