#if I’m feeling nice maybe I’ll think of posting a snippet

[catzz089]

In my humble opinion, we should have 2 parts of the story this week, to make up for what we didn't have, you know? (PLEASE tell me that the part will be from Max's perspective?????????¿¿?¿?)

Lmao, you people know me a little too well

I was actually thinking about this, considering I’m like halfway ish through chp.23, so I’m very ahead of schedule, but then I decided that we cannot do a double chapter this week, I really think you guys would prefer it NEXT week, you’ll see why

Yes, next part will be Max, and we get to meet a few characters we haven’t seen before!

[ladysomething]

I forget, is it snippet wednesday or full chapter wednesday today?

hi!

it is snippet Wednesday, and I did post one last night, but after the day we've alll had .. fuck it, lets have another one.

this one will also be heavily edited before it makes it's way to ao3, so that's exciting! yay for seeing the process!

“You can talk to me,” Max murmurs, voice so endearingly awkward and unsure. “If you want. I—I’ll listen.” 

He’s so nice. He’s always so nice, always just wants to be kind to him, but Charles doesn’t think he deserves it. 

“Why would you do that for me?” Charles asks, sniffling loudly. 

It’s pathetic. He’s pathetic. 

“You know why,” Max answers, a little helplessly. 

Charles’ heart squeezes, so painfully it makes him whimper. He doesn’t deserve this. He doesn’t deserve Max, and his unwavering loyalty, his dedication to keeping Charles safe even when he was being such a dick. He definitely doesn’t deserve to still have Max’s love, even when Charles can give him nothing back.

“I’m sorry,” Charles says, but it comes out almost as a sob. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I’ve been so mean to you and now you’re stuck with me forever and I can’t even . . .” 

“Stuck?” Max asks, clearly bewildered. Charles doesn’t blame him—he’s just as confused at his own behaviour. It makes him cry harder, because Max is being so gentle, even though Charles is acting crazy. “What on Earth makes you think I feel stuck? If anything, you’re the one stuck with me.” 

“You are,” Charles cries, fists tightening in Max’s shirt. “You’re so nice, and you always defend me, even though Lando was right, because I can’t make any food and you always have to do it and maybe I can’t have kids but everyone keeps telling me that you want them! I’ve ruined everything. I ruined your life, and my life, and what if I can’t even win the Championship? What if I’m not good enough? And—and—Kelly! What about Kelly? Jean-Luc is here, all the time, and not with Kelly and Penelope and it’s all my fault, I’m so stupid, I don’t know why all of you would do this for me! I’m not worth it, I’m not, Max, I’m so stupid.” 

Max rubs gentle, soothing circles on his back as Charles sobs desperately into his neck. He doesn’t even know where half of that came from, which just makes him cry more. 

What is he even saying? What is he talking about? He really is so fucking stupid—

“You’re not stupid,” Max whispers fervently. “Don’t even say that. You’ve been put in an awful situation and you tried to make the best of it. That doesn’t make you stupid.” 

Charles sobs loudly, rubbing his wet face against Max’s shirt. 

“Don’t be nice to me,” Charles whispers desperately. “I don’t deserve for you to be nice to me.”

[frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe]

werewolf!steve ficlet snippet from last week's wip wednesday poll!

btw, this all started from my tags on this post lmao

Robin chuckles again, lower in volume this time, and he prepares himself for whatever shit he’s gonna get from her about this. Steve asking the subject of his relatively new gay bi panic turned full-blown crush why exactly he’d be into him right to his face has got to be like Christmas coming early to her.

“It’s the whole claiming thing too, alright, don’t get me wrong, but it's also the..” Eddie’s face shifts into embarrassment and his cheeks tinge pink, as if what he’s about to say is the more embarrassing part than the horny biting thing (Steve’s read a few fics in his time too, sue him.), “The Belonging thing. Like, they picked you to be a part of their family, their ‘pack’.” he emphasizes the word with his fingers. “I like the whole chosen family part….” he says, quietly, then his face switches out of embarrassment, going back into confidence in a blink, “But a full-hearted “Yes!” to the whole staking their claim thing. Also definitely that.”

The others groan, the sound morphing into laughter, and Steve thinks he’s off the hook about answering. Until.

“So? Steve?”

Damnit Robin.

“I mean..” Steve’s face burns hot again, the initial flush that had managed to die off coming back full force. “I don’t know about the whole claiming thing, I’m not into biting,”

‘Getting bitten,’ he corrects in his head, ‘Biting, however..’ leaving his mark on someone, the bright red imprints of his teeth standing out against the pale skin of their—the… hypothetically pale skin of their throat (and hypothetical long dark-brown curls too maybe).

He shakes off the thought, “I can definitely understand the family part though, ‘d be nice to be chosen and be chosen forever.”

“See? Exactly! Steve gets it!” Eddie says, grinning and gesturing wildly at him.

Steve’s probably the only one who doesn’t miss the low shuffling sounds of Jonathan and Nancy squirming where they sit.

“The rest of you don’t understand,” Eddie continues on, standing up and turning to walk out of the room. “But believe me, when I find out werewolves are real,” He stops at the back of the armchair Steve’s settled himself in and puts both his hands on Steve’s shoulders, squeezing slightly, “You’ll be the first one I tell, big boy.” He pats the side of Steve’s face with one ringed hand, then turns out the open doorway and down the hall.

“When?” Steve manages to say.

“When!” Eddie calls back, and Steve hears the bathroom door click shut.

“What a goofball,” Nancy says, shaking her head and standing up herself, straightening her shirt and wandering over to Steve’s record player.

Steve can feel Robin vibrating from across the room, so he sighs, stands, and says, “I gotta fix the pool. Bobs, you wanna.?”

“Yeah, I’ll help.” she says, way too excitedly, and follows him past the dining table to the sunroom and out the back sliding door.

As soon as her foot hits the concrete patio, she starts.

“Holy shit!”

“Shhh! Shut up!”

vote here for which fic i should focus on in the next week!!

[fourtyforever]

okay, now you NEED to give us a snippet of the EMT au!!

ahhhhh well if you’re really interested I can definitely do that for you!! 🫣

(context: max works with an event EMS company, daniel is a patient at a concert)

—

He set down the PCR, finally taking a good look at Daniel’s nose in the bright lights of the first-aid room. The purpling, crooked bruise sat awkwardly on his otherwise rather good-looking face. Max made sure to palpate the injury gently but firmly enough to feel the break in the cartilage, stopping whenever Daniel hissed in pain under his hands. From this close he could see every detail of the man’s face, from the pinch of his brow when Max pressed on the bruise to the way his long eyelashes fluttered shut when Max finally took his hands away.

“It definitely feels broken,” said Max, noting down his findings on the PCR. “I don’t think we need to call an ambulance, but you should go to the ER tonight to get it checked out.”

Daniel grimaced, the scrunch of his face looking painful on his already swollen nose. “Like, right now?”

“I’m still a little concerned about your head, and for your nose the sooner you can get to a real doctor, the better,” said Max. “I can tell you from experience that the music does not get any more interesting. And it would be a shame to not at least try to fix a nose as nice as yours.”

He wasn’t really sure why he said that last bit, but at least it made Daniel beam. His smile was so genuine even from behind a wad of gauze and a broken nose. Max found that he couldn’t help but return it, his cheeks warming. “Aw, shucks. In that case, I’ll get down there right away.”

—

maybe when our dear ao3 returns from the war I’ll post chapter one…..mayhaps

[bropunzeling]

Me: I am in need of a Seattle AU tidbit, I fear

(goes to randomly scroll your blog)

The knowledge of its eventual existence haunts me in such a fun way 🥰

ahh ty, the editing is (very slowly) happening but my fingers are still crossed to get started posting in august!!! here's a snippet:

Leon’s only left alone for a few seconds, though, because as soon as he finishes dealing with his tape, he comes face to face with Keith Tkachuk making a beeline across the room for his stall, Matthew trailing in his wake. 

“So this is Drai,” Keith says once he gets there, smiling down at Leon. “I’ve heard a lot about you.” Behind him, Matthew comes to a halt, mouthing something, though Leon has no idea what.

“Oh,” Leon says, when it becomes clear he’s supposed to say something. “Only good things, I hope.”

Keith laughs, which seems like a good sign. Though the look in Matthew’s eyes makes it seem like maybe not. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to your liney?” he asks Matthew, digging an elbow into Matthew’s side. 

“Seemed like you were doing okay on your own,” Matthew grumbles. He gestures at Leon. “Dad, Leon. Leon, my dad.”

Leon shoves himself into standing up without much grace, holding out a hand. Seems like a good idea to be extra polite. Make a good impression. “Nice to meet you.”

Keith’s handshake is hearty and hard. Leon’s gonna feel it in his fingers later. “Talked to your dad a little bit,” he says once he finally releases Leon. “Nice guy. Did you know we were at the Olympics at the same time?”

Leon shakes his head mutely.

“Oh, yeah. Might have even played each other. Crazy, right? What a small fuckin’ world.”

“Dad.” Matthew grabs his dad’s shoulder, shaking him. “Let Drai get his gear off, for fuck’s sake.” He shoots Leon a speaking look, full of loving exasperation and, Leon thinks, a hint of nervousness.

“Alright, alright, alright,” Keith says, waving Matthew off. “God, he’s bossy, isn’t he?” he asks Leon. “I’m sure you know.”

“Dad.” Matthew looks about ready to drag Keith away.

“Heard you the first time, kid,” Keith says amiably. “Well, we’ll see you tomorrow, won’t we? Hope you can pull out the win. Be nice to take Detroit down a peg or two.”

“Yeah, well. That’s the job,” Leon says, looking at Matthew as he says it. Too bad Matthew’s face offers no clues as to whether he’s taking the right tack. “No point in playing if we don’t win.”

Keith gives another of those booming laughs. “I like this one,” he tells Matthew. “Alright, keep your hair on. I’ll leave your guy alone.” “Jesus Christ,” Matthew mumbles, finally succeeding in tugging Keith away. As they walk towards Matthew’s side of the room, he glances over his shoulder, shooting a look that Leon can’t totally decipher, but he knows means something. Hopefully that he managed all of that okay.

[passing-traveler]

Aftereffects of the war

-LU Warriors POV, loose vent-esque writing w/ending resolution-

[Disclaimer: I didn't INTEND for this to end up fitting so well as a Wars POV writing snippet, but rolled with it in the end, so have fun with this! Obviously, there's projection & my own take on Wars' characterization but I think it's interesting enough to post 👍 Enjoy!]

My neck is in pain to the point I almost want to cry, but I can’t. The war’s still on, and I need to do the work.

The war never ended, really. I’m finding that out the hard way. It’s carried on in the way my joints ache, the chronic soreness of my neck and shoulders from holding my head up so high, posture so stiff and upright.

That’s habit now. Even when I relax, have someone to relax around, the ache is etched in my bones, and no amount of pressing on the muscle can dig it out. My breathing is shallow and shuddering, only deep when I’m asleep. Breathing practices go through the motions, of what it would be like to be able to slow down and be a person. The war is still calling, and I don’t have time to wait.

I can do the work. It’s my duty, my reason for being, and the pain will be there, no matter what action I take. Take an ibuprofen and move on.

Maybe it’s the ache in my heart that’s weighing heavy today, that’s making my joints sing the anthems and battle cries that were once daily routine. I’m in the war back then again, but now older, wiser, able to shoulder more pain and grit my teeth and take one more step further towards victory.

There were moments where I didn’t think the war was winnable. I kept moving forwards anyway, because that was the only option I had. It’s the only option I’ve always had, and I don’t mind it. It keeps me alive. Whatever works.

Everyone needs me alive, and I’m not sure how much longer my shoulders can take it. I just have to hope that they’ll catch me like they did back then. It’s not a war without injury and sacrifice.

Maybe one day I’ll let myself cry. Maybe one day the war can wait.

I don’t think today is that day.

But maybe I’m back in the captain’s tent, and it’s somewhere close to midnight, and the scouts have reported no signs of enemy approach. Maybe we’re on a journey to a destination, a future battleground, we all know it, but have set up camp for the night.

Maybe I’m in camp. That might be nice.

 I can settle in with my maps and troop movements under candlelight and trace my fingers over the wrinkles of the paper, the water stains and inkblots, and take a breath. The war hasn’t ended, but I can ease into the moments of peace where they are. I’m still ready to fight, as I always am, but can also remember the moments of comfortable quiet. That feels like a suitable compromise.

[thebearer]

Your writing is amazing!!! please please do more angst/fighting with Carmy. It really puts me in my feels.

ahh thank you!!! i'm actually working on another full fic tha will be a lot of angst and fighting a jealousy and hopefully will be posted soon!!!

I'm gonna leave a little snippet of a portion of their fight scene right down here as sort of a sneak peek :) enjoy!

Carmen looked like he might pass out, palms rubbing against his jeans, eyes bouncing from you to her. “Y’know we should catch up sometime, Carmy. I’d love to see Sugar and Richie.” 

“Yeah, I-I’m not sure what they’re-” 

“-You know what.” You snipped, teeth ground tight. “I think I’ll finish shopping, and you two can catch up, alright?” You snatch the list out of Carmen’s hand. “It was so nice to meet you, Claire.” 

Carmen can feel your fury even after you stomp away, whizzing into the next aisle, slinging the basket with so much fury the detergent slides and he cringes as he thinks about the plums that probably got crushed. 

“Uh-oh,” Claire snickers. “Looks like I got you in trouble.” 

“Yeah- I mean, no, she’s just… We have plans later, so I gotta go. Tell your family I said hello.” Carmen nods, barely hearing her reply before he’s chasing you down the aisles. 

“Baby, hey, c’mon-” 

“Don’t.” You hissed, shoving Carmen’s hand off you. “Go back and talk to Claire Bear.” You snarled, voice rising in pitch to mock the name. 

“Don’t do this.” Carmen’s stomach turned, twisting with that familiar twinge of anxiety. His eyes were already darting towards the far end of the store, feeling like he needed to get a bottle of Pepto… maybe two. 

“Do what?” You snapped, huffing at him. “Honestly, Carmen, how would you feel if I ran into one of my old exes and they were talkin’ to me like that, huh?” 

“She’s not an ex-” 

“-Oh? She isn’t?” You deadpanned, glaring at Carmen. He faltered, eyes darting from your gaze just for a moment. “You’re such a fucking liar, Carmen, I’m not stupid.” You huffed, shoving the cart. 

“Hey,” Carmen snapped, heavy hand landing on the cart’s handle to stop it. “Cut it out, alright?”

[vergina-spva]

sexuality crisis fics are indeed very fun to write, please show me a snippet of yours (or tell me about it, your choice) 👀

So, I honestly have two different lil timelines and I don't know which one it'll be or if I'll ever even post this, but... here goes, a snippet:

Heat sighed, his own mind driving him crazy. “Wire,” he called his best friend, who was sitting on the couch looking at some papers from a case he was working on. “Can I talk to you for a moment, without you making fun of me?”

Wire slowly looked up, turning his head towards him. “That’s gonna be hard,” he said with a smirk on his face. “But I’ll try.”

Heat walked towards him and sat down on the arm rest of the couch. “I… just don’t know what to think anymore. About myself. About…” He took a deep breath. “About my sexuality.”

Wire raised an eyebrow at that, but didn’t reply and just let Heat explain himself.

“A few weeks ago, I, uhm… I let a guy suck my dick.”

Now both Wire’s eyebrows went up. “Who? Shachi?”

Heat chuckled. “No, he refuses to do that. I asked him – nicely.” He smiled amused. “He says that’s a step too far. Apparently, putting a cock in his mouth would make him question his sexuality, but up his ass is fine.” This gained him a snort from Wire, but it immediately reminded Heat of his own questions about his sexuality again. “No, it was someone else. I promised not to tell, but… I got offered a blowjob and I accepted.”

Wire looked amused. “Well, good for you.”

“Yeah, well… it was pretty good. But that’s the point.” Heat put his hands in his hair, pulling at the dreads. “Like, I’m not attracted to that guy, I think, but I did enjoy it. And then there’s fucking Shachi every now and then… I also really enjoy that.” He looked his friend in the eyes. “I know you think we shouldn’t let ourselves be defined by labels and whatever, but not putting a label on it feels like… I don’t know, for me it feels like it’s not real. Like there’s nothing… I don’t fit in anywhere, you know? I want to know, put the correct label on it for myself. Because now I just don’t know where I stand.”

“Hm,” Wire said, obviously not feeling the same way, but trying to understand him. “I guess that makes sense. So… maybe you’re bisexual.” He shrugged.

Heat stared at the table. “Am I, though? I don’t feel bisexual. I mean… I never look at a guy and think ‘oh, I wanna fuck him’ or ‘he’s cute!’ or anything.” He cocked his head. “I mean… except maybe for Shachi. But that’s Shachi. He doesn’t count.”

[bluedalahorse]

Blue’s self-absorbed YRS3 “revisions”

I’m someone who liked many parts of Young Royals season 3 and enjoyed it overall, but didn’t like other parts of it. As someone who enjoys breaking down story structure and character arcs and such, I’ve thought a lot since the season aired about what I would have done if the season had been in my hands and I’d been allowed to make revisions.

I decided to finally organize some of these ideas into a post. This post will be a bit broad, as I haven’t done a rewatch in a while, but I can see myself getting more specific after I do my annual Christmas-season rewatch of the entire series. (Soon!) So maybe that will show up later, in a future post. Or maybe it won’t and I’ll spend all my time writing fanfic.

These are, of course, solely based in my opinions, and my personal likes and dislikes as a writer. I’m sure there’s other ways the series could have gone. You might have different ideas of how to “fix” things for your own personal preferences, and that’s ok! This is a post that might appeal to some fans and have the opposite effect on others. But I figured I’d post anyway, because isn’t that what tumblr fandom is for?

Anyway, here are my unsolicited suggestions…

Part I. Return Felice to her investigatory roots

At the end of season 1, Felice got to be a detective and figured out it was August who leaked the video.

In season 2, Felice acts as Wilhelm’s sympathetic ear. (Wilhelm owes her compensation imo.)

I wonder about a version of season 3 where Felice could have been the gatherer of stories from her fellow Hillerska students. Not in a way where she’s solely doing emotional labor, but in a way where she’s trying to uncover the truth about the school and give the school inspectors the information they need to make their decision. Maybe she starts out thinking things at Hillerska aren’t too bad for most people, and her own negative experiences are a fluke. But the more Felice digs, the more she realizes the system has problems. This would integrate nicely with Felice coming to realize her friends are kinda fake, and rebuilding her relationship with Sara.

(I also would really love to see a conversation between Felice and Nils about what it’s like being two of the only students of color at the school, and in a “model minority” sort of way. Even an awkward, halting conversation. Ever since I read it in a fic snippet, I want MORE.)

I don’t love that they cut away from Felice’s interview in canon. I wish we’d actually gotten to see it, so we could feel the impact her testimony had. And maybe in a storyline where Felice is a more deliberate gatherer of stories, we can see her impact multiplied. I want her to feel like a key part of the decision to close Hillerska down!

Part II. Let Sara navigate an abortion storyline

I’m actually shocked this didn’t happen in canon. There were so many little moments that felt like foreshadowing for a plot where Sara is pregnant. On so many levels the show is about the line of succession to the monarchy, and also the question of whether or not we become our parents. What better way to make this question feel urgent and relevant than a storyline where Sara could be pregnant?

Obviously Sara’s feelings are the most important here, and I think it would encourage Sara to think about her own parents a lot and what she inherits them, the way she already is thinking about them in season 3. She’d also be processing her own shame and loneliness, and I think her potentially being pregnant might add to her reasons for self-isolating.

At the same time, this kind of plot would also add increased depth and stakes to Sara’s relationships. Sara and Simon? Both of them are becoming adults, and both experienced rather tumultuous first loves with some intense risk associated with them. Sara and Felice? Time to explore the role that women play in the class hierarchy, and how much emphasis is placed on reproduction in the Hillerska culture. Sara and August? August is still grieving his dad, so the notion of him potentially becoming a parent could throw him through an emotional loop. Pretty much all of these are grounds for rich storytelling! Again, I am shocked the writers didn’t choose this as a plot because it ties so many things together.

Of course there’s one relationship the show could choose to develop further…

Part III. Give Wilhelm and Sara a tie to one another

One of my biggest disappointments in season 3 is that Sara and Wilhelm didn’t get to build a relationship with one another in season 3. After all the time paralleling one another in seasons 1 and 2, it really felt like a letdown. They only exchanged one line!

Building on the idea that Sara could have started the season pregnant, I wonder what could have happened if—somehow, in episode 1 or 2–Wille walked in on Sara holding a positive pregnancy test. We’d have to somehow maneuver them into the same space, and that might be challenging, but I don’t think it’d be impossible. We can be creative!

What I was hoping for was a situation where Sara and Wille have a conversation about this, and Sara’s freaking out a bit, as she would be. And Wille actually manages to calm her down, and talks her through getting abortion pills and finds a way to stay with her on the day when she takes them. They see that day as a temporary truce between them, at first, though of course it allows them to open up to one another a little bit, and they begin texting even just a little bit, when they can. They agree to keep the abortion a secret, and promise to not even tell Simon about it. Of course, Sara opens up to the other main three over the course of the season, by her own choice.

If Wille helping Sara through an abortion storyline is too much, him helping her navigate a pregnancy scare could potentially hold similar emotional weight. I’d also like to see Wille meaningfully interact with a female character where it isn’t him and his mom in conflict, or him over-relying on Felice for emotional support without giving much in return. Like can we just have unexpected reproductive rights ally Wilhelm? As a treat?

Part IV. Give August and Simon a tie to one another

As I envisioned this Sara-Wilhelm scenario in my head, I realized it could be balanced out by a parallel storyline where Simon and August have to interact with one another in new ways. The season opens with the legal settlement between them, but it’s clear that the legal settlement doesn’t create catharsis. I actually like this decision. I wish we had gotten a chance to see Simon and August interact around their conflict, though, because the Simon-August conflict and the Wilhelm-August conflict were set up as two very different conflicts in season 1. By season 3 this had somehow become “Simon and Wilhelm together against August” which… I didn’t love. I’ve written about that before, so I won’t rehash it too much here.

So I asked myself what would happen if Simon and August were the ones who got into a fistfight in the library, instead of Wilhelm and August, and then it’s Simon and August who are thrown into mediation together with Boris. I get why Wilhelm and August were the ones fighting canonically, and it wasn’t a decision I hated. But in the universe in my head where Sara-Wilhelm interaction is happening, I like the idea of Simon-August-Boris interaction happening alongside it.

What follows is an opportunity for August to make real restitution to Simon, and for Simon to have a real chance to articulate how everything with the video on down affected him, and tell the truth to August. I’m basing this not in my own silly little thoughts, but in what I’ve read about restorative practice and how it can be used to work through these kinds of incidents. Simon and August don’t have to forgive and love one another and suddenly be besties, but it would be interesting to see them come to understand one another, especially given the things they have in common, and maybe talk more authentically. The scene where Simon notices August’s disordered eating tendencies during the sit-in would also have a lot more resonance if they’ve been in these mediation sessions together.

And then it could lead to my next idea…

Part V. Keep the Erik reveal, but change how it’s delivered

I know a lot of people didn’t like the Erik reveal. It was one of my favorite parts of the season, and built on a lot of what I imagined to be true about the characters. I cried when Malte delivered his monologue.

What if August doesn’t tell Wille it was Erik who oversaw the homophobic initiation? What if he tells Simon instead?

And then Simon is sitting on this piece of information knowing that Wille is grieving Erik, but that the truth could come out at any time, and it would hurt Wilhelm more. Simon is agonizing over whether to tell Wille the truth. Then, sometime during Wille’s birthday celebration, as the family tension escalates and Simon feels increasingly uncomfortable with the family’s verbal hagiography of Erik, he tells Wille.

Wilhelm is furious and breaks up with Simon in response. Simon leaves the palace. I feel like this would be an interesting twist on how their relationship has played out in the past—usually we have Wilhelm pursuing Simon and Simon setting boundaries, but now we have Wille shutting Simon out when Simon confronts him with something he needs to hear but doesn’t want to.

And over the next few days, Wille seeks out August and asks him, why would Simon say this? to meYou know this wasn’t true, that Erik wouldn’t do this, you were there. And August corroborates what Simon says, which leads him and Wilhelm into a difficult—but ultimately cathartic conversation—about what it means to grieve highly flawed people. Maybe there’s even a callback to their conversation from 1.4, where August talks to Wilhelm about grieving his dad. As a coda, August encourages Wilhelm to go and make an effort to win Simon back. August has lost his romance with an Eriksson sibling, so he knows how much the heartbreak hurts. He thinks Wille still has a chance with Simon, so he pushes him to do that. And thus the endgame endgames the way fandom wants it to.

In my mind this still leads to Wilhelm leaving the monarchy. It could even end in Wilhelm and August leaving behind the monarchy together, in solidarity. I’m leaving that open for now, but I like thinking about this as a storyline that could have been.

Thanks for reading if you read this far! I enjoy filling up my brain with these thoughts.

[total-serene560]

Chapter 4: What's On Your Mind?

Will's boss hates air conditioning and Mike Wheeler, the OG Party sees The Blob and Will has a bad time, Mike mysteriously appears at Will's house after work one day, Will successfully runs a DnD session while halfway ready to call an Amber Alert for Mike until he arrives an hour late, and Will finally puts the pieces together after a late night conversation in a car.

(all in a nice 10k word package!)

Fic Summary:

Senior year arrives off the back of a wasted summer and brings with it a whole can of worms that Mike has been trying to avoid opening since eighth grade. Left with Will being in his usual DM position in the club that he started, a distant sister he's convinced hates him, parents that can't seem to stop fighting, a burning truth in his heart that he can't stamp out, and a terrifyingly bleak future looming ahead; Mike struggles to navigate the year from hell. But maybe Mike isn't as alone as he thought, and maybe... just maybe, everything has a way of working itself out for the better.

Will's life seems to be changing faster and faster every day. Jonathan leaves after graduating community college and making it into Purdue, Will's mom gets a promotion at work and starts getting more serious with Hopper, and Will ends up in charge of the DnD Club for the first time ever. On top of that, his friendship with Mike is becoming increasingly... odd. Strained. Tense. What starts with a movie night slowly changes their friendship, and with it turns Will's whole world on it's head- Again. But... maybe not everything has to be bad. Maybe change can be good, even. If only it wasn't so damn scary.

(A post-ST2 AU)

Snippet below the cut:

Snippet:

“That sucks,” Will says instead, “I’m sorry.” “It’s fine,” Mike says, shrugging as he meets his eye, “It’s just so stupid, you know.” “Yeah,” Will nods, “Dads suck.” “They do,” Mike says, his face softening into a smile, “Hey. You’re my best friend. You know that, right?” “Yeah, you are too,” Will says, smiling back, and then he swallows when Mike doesn’t look away, his smile falling a little as his eyes do this quick motion down-and-up over his face. The inside of the car is dark, intimate, and Will suddenly feels lightheaded as he looks down at Mike’s hand again, his fingers tapping lightly against the parking brake between them. He looks back up at Mike’s face, and Mike is still staring, his eyes almost black in the low light. And Will thinks about August, about the movie theater, about his voice on the radio saying We can be scared together, if you want. Scared together. Crazy together.  “Are you drunk?”  “A little.” August, Mike’s dark brown eyes, his mouth dry. Mike looked down.  “Yeah, sorry, I was- I wasn’t feeling well that night.” Mike shakes his head after a moment, looking back at Will’s house, “I’ll see you tomorrow?” Will’s mouth is dry as he nods, “Yeah, tomorrow.” 

tagging: @foodiewithdahoodie@sparks-olivarpente@maru-chu@greenfiend@booksandpaperss@magentamee@doriandrifting@itsacleanmachine@moon-and-stars @fireflywitch(if you wanna be added or removed from the tag list lmk!)

[lemon-towne]

HOLDEN PREVIEW TIMEEEEUHHH

Okay so I’ve realized that I’ve never given yall anything else abt the Michael book (book? Idk maybe an online fic or smthn) other than the potential covers for it

Needles to say I felt bad and so to make it up to yall I’ll post a small snippet of a part in the actual story so here yall go <3333

(Be nice bookie this is a draft, a really rough one so don’t expect a whole lot.)

TW

___________________________________

“It seems as if you take the things I do for you, MY SON, for granted. Michael I just don’t understand, you’re right; I don’t. But you blatantly refuse to talk to me when you have a problem so how am I supposed to know if something is bothering you?”

She looks at me with a blank expression after that. . .expecting me to answer wrongly. As if I don’t know what I’m talking about.

As if I don’t know how I feel.

“Because you never bother to ask.”

I pause.

“I don’t tell you things because you never even bother to ask. When I do open up to you, you feel the need to tell me I have nothing to be upset over.”

I remain in the same place, just standing there. . .looking down at my mother.

“When I come to you, you lash out on me. You tell me to ‘Just be happy’ to ‘look on the bright side’ or better yet ‘I’ve been on this earth longer than you have, what do you know about the world? You’re still pretty young!’ Well I’m fucking sick of it. .”

The words come out like a flood, it feels like I can’t stop! I want to stop but I can’t, they just keep pouring out of me like river.

Like a damn that was finally broken. First a few drops. . .then a small stream. . .then the rest of the flood.

“You can’t keep telling me to cheer up when there isn’t anything to be happy over anymore ! Fuck man- when was the last time you have asked me ‘How was school today’ ?”

“Don’t you dare get smart with me! Don’t you think I try my best, Michael!?”

She’s screaming now.

“I try my best as a mother to provide you with a home, a bed, clothes to wear, food to eat ! I don’t get a fucking ‘thank you for any of it !”

“Yeah! Mum I think you blatantly forget, that is the bare fucking minimum that you are supposed to do for your child !”

. . . I scream back.

“Thank you for providing the things that I needed as a child ! The shit that I NEEDED, yes ! You could’ve been utterly fucking neglectful but Jesus for you to be emotionally unavailable is just as terrible !”

This was the first time, in a long time that I have seen my mother display such raw emotion. Her face. .i can’t even recognize her face now. It’s all scrunched up and red with anger. It looks as if steam is about to start shooting out of her ears as if she’s some sort of cartoon character.

“All of the sacrifices, all of the time, pain, energy- whatever! I gave up my entire LIFE to raise you as best as I can, your father and I working for hours ! Hardly being home to make sure YOU have a place to rest your head at night ! And you’re right! What the hell do you know about living ? Normally when teenagers complain about wanted to be treated like adults it’s because they ARE being treated as such ! You’re sad ! Okay ! I get it Michael but for fuck sake stop making it everyone else’s problem !”

I had already emotionally disconnected from this conversation. .i start to walk towards the front door, not even looking at Jane anymore.

“Oh where are you going now.”

She says, her voice starting to become quiet

“Out.”

“With whom ?”

“. . .”

“Michael Alex Holden. I know you hear me speaking to you.”

I do. But I don’t say a word. .i don’t say a word as I open the door and I remain silent as I leave the house.

———————————————————————————————————

womp womp hope u like it or wtv

[thebawdybaldurian]

Rookcanis Posting: Wanksgiving!

Happy holidays to those who celebrate or who just need a sexy assassin to take over cooking duties. This is a little snippet of when my Rook and Lucanis return to the Lighthouse from Treviso after first meeting. It features a double helping of sex dreams and masturbation! I’ll be post a special “Stuffing” scene tomorrow, that will be set later in their relationship.

Content and Warnings: oral sex, PIV sex, sexual dreams, demonic lust, allusions to somnophilia/unconscious masturbation over a sleeping person, crude humor, masturbation, obsession, scent kink.

Contains a brief mention of a major late game spoiler of Dragon Age The Veilguard.

Maene finished giving Lucanis a tour of the Lighthouse after they returned from Treviso, ending up in the dining hall last. “We’re a little short on beds at the moment, but if you find an empty room that you like, the Caretaker can bring you a cot,” Mae said, brushing some dust off a pantry shelf to keep her restless hands occupied. Her stomach still fluttered when she was around Lucanis and if her hands weren’t busy, she found herself mindlessly rubbing them across her skin, longing for his touch.

“This will be fine,” Lucanis looked around, seeing no other exits and sturdy, defensible walls.

“What do you mean?” Mae asked. “You…you want to sleep in the pantry?”

“I sleep hot…and it’s nice and cool in here. Only one way in or out. No worry of someone sneaking up on me in my sleep,” he replied, looking over some of the wisp-eaten food stuffs.

“Do you…expect someone to sneak up on you in your sleep?” She asked.

“Just being pragmatic. If I let my security lapse one time…who’s to say I won’t do it again in a more dangerous environment?”

“Fair enough…I could never be an assassin,” Mae mused. “I’ve fallen asleep in the middle of crowded library with my coin purse hanging off my belt. Not to mention my poor dexterity with a blade…I failed my cadaver test twice because my hands were shaking so much.”

“Maybe you could kill them with kindness?” Lucanis smiled, still grateful for the kind words of remembrance she’d recited for his grandmother.

“If only,” Mae sighed, her face suddenly feeling hot. Being in such close quarters with him was making her anxious. “Does it get any easier?…Killing people? I’m just so used to doing the opposite. ”

“Somewhat,” he replied softly, her deep-blue doe eyes making his own stomach anxious. “Why don’t you leave the killing to me if you can?”

“Probably a good idea,” she nodded, leaving them in awkward silence for a moment.

“Kiss her!” Spite interjected, Mae standing close enough to Lucanis that he need only grab ahold of her waist to pull her in. “Push her against that stack of stale grain and stick your tongue down her throat! Let me taste her! Look at that beautiful mouth of hers.”

Lucanis make a slight growl in his throat, though just the thought of kissing her made his spine bristle. “Is Spite at it again?” Mae asked, taking a step back from Lucanis.

“He’s barely shut up since we left the Ossuary,” Lucanis replied as Spite mimed trying to kiss her, his spectral tongue disappearing against her mouth. “Do you have a spell that can make him mute?”

“I’d have to go into the Fade and apply some sort of arcane muzzle.”

“Mmmmm…sounds kinky,” Spite grinned, pecking his lips loudly around her and making her shiver.

“I might let you risk it…just for a moment’s peace,” Lucanis sighed.

“At least spite can be a powerful motivator,” Mae tried to offer some sort solace. “Not the worst kind of demon to be possessed by.”

“Ahhhh, I think that she likes us!” Spite replied excitedly. “Ask her if she’s ever been veil-split!”

“No,” Lucanis groaned. “What does that even mean?”

“Ask her!” Spite urged again.

“No!” Lucanis stamped his foot, looking away from Mae in embarrassment.

“Do…you two want to be alone?” Mae tried not to grin.

“Coward!” Spite taunted.

“Fine, if I ask her, will you shut up for a few hours?” Lucanis hissed, walking away from Mae.

“Yes,” Spite lied.

“Ask me what?” Mae wondered.

“Have you ever heard of…veil-splitting?” Lucanis asked hesitantly.

Mae knitted her brow, knowing a great deal about the Fade and the Veil, but never having come across the term in any of her studies. “I can’t say that I have,” she replied.

“It’s when you fuck the physical body here and the spiritual body in the Fade…it’s supposed to be amazing!” Spite revealed.

“Ughhhh,” Lucanis groaned, shaking his head in disgust. “I’ll let you get back to…not dealing with my problem,” he looked away from her. “I am sure you have better things to do.”

“Oh…okay. If you need anything, just ask the Caretaker…or me,” she let out a disappointed sigh. She wanted to keep talking to him, but he didn’t seem like he wanted company anymore.

She left him alone in the pantry, heading to see the Caretaker about bringing him a cot. Lucanis did his best to ignore Spite, looking through the dusty crates and barrels for anything salvageable. “So you don’t think she’d want to try it?” Spite asked.

“No, probably not!” Lucanis snarled. “She would be unconscious when she was in the Fade, you pig.”

“It would be consensual…mostly,” Spite assured. “I’d be the go between…but she’d go between us.”

“If you don’t stop talking, I am going to stab myself in the eye,” Lucanis growled, sitting down on a barrel with a heavy thump.

“Fine, fine,” Spite relented. “But if you don’t try her…I will…the first chance that I get.”

“No one is ‘trying’ her. Leave. Her. Alone.”

“Awfully touchy about her if you claim to have no interest,” Spite teased, thankfully retreating from Lucanis’ psyche for a moment. He settled in as best he could, the room feeling like one of his luxurious homes after a year in the Ossuary.

The Lighthouse pantry was bereft of coffee, much to his chagrin. His regular bean seller had been out while they were in the city and he’d expected the Lighthouse to at least have something. He tried mixing up some of the black tea he found, but it seemed to have to opposite effect he intended. He tried to keep himself awake by reading, but must have dozed off at some point. He sunk into a dreamless sleep for a bit, unaware that Spite was now puppeting his body. He sleepwalked out of the pantry, sniffing the air for the scent of death magic, mixed with a hint of chamomile and smoky incense.

Lucanis eventually began to dream, finding himself back in something that resembled the Ossuary. He felt a sudden pang of hopelessness, thinking that his rescue had been a dream instead. He slumped in the back of his cell, closing his eyes as frustration pained across his brow. It was soon soothed by slight coolness, like a kiss upon his forehead. He opened his eyes, seeing Maene kneeling above him. “Hi,” she said softly, in the same shy voice that made him melt inside.

“Mae,” he smiled, his stomach fluttering with hope now.

“What are you doing here? Didn’t you already rescue me?”

“I did, but Zara found us and recaptured you. I was able to get away and attack her. It was a fight to the death and I won eventually…but not before she tore most of my clothes off,” Mae replied coquettishly.

“Oh?” Lucanis blushed, suddenly noticing Mae was dressed only in her small clothes. They were dark green and lacy, a contrast to her pale skin. “Here,” he went to remove his jacket for her to cover herself with, before realizing he was still in the threadbare prison clothes he’d lived in before his escape.

He removed his shirt instead, handing it to her and leaving himself bare chested.

“Most men would try to get me into less clothing,” she laughed, slipping the shirt over her head.

“I’m not most men,” he replied, trying to avoid looking into the pools of deep blue that sat between her adorable nose.

“You certainly aren’t,” she replied, grabbing his chin and making him look at her.

She leaned in and gave him a soft kiss, opening her mouth slightly to give him his first taste of coffee in over a year, spiked with the slightest bit of honey. He wanted more, kissing her deeper and pulling her close. Each swirl of her tongue sent a wave of heat down his spine. He only pulled away when it felt like he could barely breathe. “Mae,” he let out a heavy sigh, staring up into her Crow-blue eyes.

“Lucanis,” she replied breathily, slipping his shirt back over her head. “I want you…”

“Columbina,” he cooed, pulling her in for another kiss before trailing his mouth down to her breast, pulling away her bodice.

Her areola and nipples were the most delicate shade of pink, darkening slightly as he kissed and sucked on them. He pushed her backwards and down onto the floor, kissing down her stomach and slowly sliding her panties down. He let out an excited groan when he saw the dewed, pink delta between her thighs, kissing it immediately. She tasted like sweet cream, delicate and perfect for his tongue to lap up. She moaned loudly, gripping the nape of his hair in her fingers. “Oh…Lucanis…please!” She cried out, her thighs shivering against his ears.

“Tell me what you want, little dove…anything,” he breathed hot against her sex, looking up at her in supplication.

“Fuck me!” She moaned, pulling him up between her legs.

They worked in tandem to get his pants down, before he slid gently inside her. They shared a loud gasp together, their bodies perfectly connected. He’d never felt anything so pleasurable in his entire life, thrusting slowly but deeply into her. His heart began to pound, thudding loudly in his chest with rhythmic precision. It thumped faster as his hips quickened, suddenly impatient to feel that ultimate end with her. ‘Thump, thump, thump,’ was all he heard as her sweet moans faded. The warmth of her slick canal began to fade as well, but he still heard that thump, getting faster and more urgent. The sensation became hot and dry, the bit of friction making his lip curl in discomfort.

He suddenly realized that he wasn’t making love to Mae, he was standing over her, pumping his cock swiftly in his hand, the thump of it rapping off the table behind the chaise that she slept on. He wasn’t in the Ossuary, but the room that she’d mentioned she stayed in. The wall in front of him was encased in glass, a sea of strange creatures floating beyond it. Mae was asleep on her back, her jet black hair braided down her shoulder. She was half-covered by a blanket, the top of her bodice peeking out. It wasn’t lacy or dark green like the chaise, just a solemn gray that he imagined a death mage would wear. She slept peacefully, her head cradled on one of her arms. The dappled light of the aquarium window made her pale skin almost glow. She looked so beautiful to gaze upon, but Lucanis pulled his hand away from himself in disgust. “Spite!” He growled as soon as he had left the room, his fists balled tightly, his cock stowed angrily in his trousers.

“We needed to relax! Get out a year of urges!” Spite protested Lucanis’ anger. “She didn’t even know we were there.”

“What if she had woken up? What if…someone had seen me go in there? They’d think I’m some filthy pervert…pleasuring myself watching her sleep!”

“I didn’t pull those desires from nowhere…filthy pervert,” Spite teased. “You want her too. You are just too scared to admit it…you…you…virgin!”

“You will be lucky if I ever sleep again after this stunt,” Lucanis snarled, stalking out of the library back towards the dining hall.

He prowled into the pantry, looking to quell his frustration by preparing breakfast for everyone. They would need to refresh the entire pantry if he was going to keep the team well-fed, but they had some basic supplies he could made due with using the few spices and special flavorings he’d brought with him. He gathered up some eggs and potatoes and began to peel them, getting a fire started as well. He cut the potatoes up and got them frying with a healthy pat of butter, seasoning them appropriately. He pulverized some large chunks of fruit, straining out the pulp and slicing some smaller pieces to eat whole. He scrambled the eggs in another pan, seasoning them as well and topping them with some fresh grated Antivan druffalo cheese. He was in no mood to eat at the moment, so he covered the food with some cloches that would keep them warm.

His unwanted erection had remained steadfast, rubbing against his trousers as he cooked. He retreated back to the pantry, shutting and barring the door so he could strip down to his undershirt and shorts to start an exercise routine. He practiced fighting drills, did push ups, dangled from the curing beams doing pull ups, and ran in place. No amount of exertion seemed to satisfy his cock. “This is your doing, isn’t it?” Lucanis huffed, doing a final round of sit ups. Each time he pulled himself up off the floor, Spite was smirking at him.

“I told you we needed to relax…it’s been a year…longer than a year…when was the last time you touched yourself? It’s not healthy to keep it all stored up in your sack.”

“None of your business,” Lucanis lowered his back down to the floor. “And how would you know what’s healthy for a mortal?”

“Desire Demons are everywhere in the Fade, you can’t walk five steps without finding one trying to tempt a mortal in ways you can’t even imagine!”

“I don’t want to imagine it!” Lucanis sat up one final time, wiping his brow. “Did they ever tempt you? Can demons be tempted by other demons?”

“There’s not much fun in that,” Spite paced the pantry, clearly as restless as Lucanis was. “Perhaps when I was bored…I liked annoying them.”

“And annoying me as well, apparently,” Lucanis sighed, springing to his feet and adjusting his cock in his shorts.

“I bet Mae isn’t boring,” Spite mused, continuing to pace. “She smells like she would be into freaky stuff.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure,” Lucanis started his cool down, doing some deep stretching. “I’ve heard those Mortalitasi can be quite uptight.”

“Not her,” Spite argued. “She’s in the Mourn Watch. I’ve heard some spirits call it the Moan Watch. They like to get nasty with spirits and skeletons. They know all kinds of kinky sex magic…they reconnect dead lovers and watch them slime each other.”

“You’re lying,” Lucanis crinkled his nose. “That’s disgusting.”

“Maybe,” Spite grinned wickedly. “Or maybe I know the scent of a woman who likes getting slimed by spirits herself. In every hole. Even the tight one.”

Lucanis growled in frustration, his cock and balls throbbing with need. “Is this what you want?” He pulled his shorts down in anger, his erection bouncing up like a spring. He ran his hand down his shaft roughly, ignoring the pre-cum on his tip.

“Could do with a little slime to make things slick,” Spite pouted, despite knowing he had won this battle.

“Stop saying ‘slime’!” Lucanis shouted, muttering a few Antivan curses under his breath.

“Fine…ectoplasm,” Spite smirked. “Spirits like it wet.”

Lucanis threw up his hands, kicking his shorts off. He eyed the shelves carefully, guessing that there was nothing else lubricating that hadn’t gone rancid, aside from the expensive, divine virgin cooking oil he’d brought with him. He uncorked the top with a grimace, gritting his teeth at the waste as he poured a small amount in his palm. “Don’t forget the tight hole,” Spite chimed in as Lucanis slicked his hand down his shaft with a quiet moan. “I know you like it played with too. Maybe you and Mae can play with each others’ while I watch?”

“Shut up and let me do it my way!” Lucanis growled, bringing his palm back up his shaft and pulsing it just under his head. He let out a satisfied grunt, sliding his fist back down slowly, with a little more pressure. “Mmmmm…fuck,” he swore quietly, leaning against the wall and closing his eyes to enjoy the sensation.

It had been more than a year, since just before he’d accepted the contract on Calivan that had gotten him into this whole mess. Relationships were difficult for a Crow, especially the supposed favorite and grandson of the First Talon. Any would-be lover within the group might just be jostling for a better position or looking for special treatment. Normal citizens would be wary of ending up on the tip of a jealous rival’s dagger. His adult life had been filled with work and the occasional crush, but nothing ever came of it. Sex was nothing but a fantasy to him or a story to read at night when he was feeling particularly restless. How could someone know him enough to allow himself to be vulnerable? His hand was good enough when he needed it and he had an expensive, ridged sleeve that he used before big jobs to get the jitters out. He’d used it before the Ossuary job, fucking it hard before jumping on a boat. It was designed to expand and contract slightly, supposedly just like a woman’s pulsing cunt. Would Mae feel as good as in his dream or was the Fade just making up the knowledge that he lacked?

He began stroking himself faster, letting his hips move along with his hand. “Mae…” he huffed longingly, trying to recall his dream. He’d told Spite she was probably boring in bed, just trying to get the demon off his back. Lucanis wouldn’t care either way, he wanted something more from her. He wanted the gentle warmth of her hand, offering a prayer for his grandmother. He wanted the exuberant giggle when she accidentally won a game of dice after misunderstanding the rules and wagers down in the casino. He wanted the compassion of a woman who argued with Neve about bringing some of the Treviso street cats to live with them in the Lighthouse, despite the felines eyeing her feathered companion for dinner. She’d managed to tame a rook, could she tame a Crow next?

He panted loudly, almost certain he could smell that slightly smoky, spiced scent that clung to her skin. He guessed it was some kind of ritual incense that they used in Nevarra and it made his head swim. Spite smelled it too, poking his head through the pantry door to see Mae awake and walking towards the dining table. He was tempted to cause some sort of disturbance, so Mae might discover what Lucanis was doing in the pantry. He decided against it, as smitten with Mae as Lucanis was. She’d called spite a powerful motivator, not him specifically, but she seemed to at least understand his existence. His physical attraction was partially tied to Lucanis’ preferences, a shapely backside and well-proportioned breasts. There was also something otherworldly about her, perhaps because she was a Dreamer and spirit medium. There was scant halo of magic around her at all times, invisible to mortal eyes, but Spite could see it. It was like a beacon to him and he’d wanted her instantly.

He watched her eat for a moment, his only hunger in life for frustration and annoyance. She let out happy moans as she ate, seemingly pleased with the food. He thought about lying to Lucanis that she hated his cooking, snickering to himself as Mae went in for seconds. He heard his bodily companion nearing climax, Lucanis’ huffs getting sharper and his hand more desperate. Perhaps he could give Lucanis a cramp and ruin it right at the end? Lucanis erupted before Spite could summon the energy to try anything, letting out a series of low moans and coating the wall with thick layer of human ectoplasm. “Now…was that so hard?” Spite smirked.

“Shut up!” Lucanis panted, trying not to give Spite the satisfaction of seeing him smile. It had felt good, especially when he imagined himself with Mae.

“Hopefully she didn’t hear you,” Spite taunted. “She’s just outside.”

“What?” Lucanis looked at him with surprise.

“Mae. She’s choking down some of your food, looking rather disgusted by the flavors. Or maybe because she heard you moaning her name.”

“Fuck!” Lucanis hissed, reaching down for his pants. “You better not be lying to me,” he added, hurriedly getting dressed.

“I think I heard her throw up in her mouth a little.”

“Go slime yourself!” Lucanis shoved past Spite’s incorporeal form, running a hand through his hair and straightening his clothes before opening the pantry door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fortunate for Maene, Lucanis had awoken and fled from her room before she had drifted into her own reverie. They tended to be quite vivid and expressive as a Dreamer and she often talked and moved in her sleep. She was back home in Nevarra City, in the quaint little apartment she kept near the Necropolis. She awoke to the smell of fresh food being cooked, the scent beckoning her like a spectral finger leading her by the nose. Lucanis stood near the small stove, stirring something slowly. He was naked aside from an apron, his back and legs tanned and toned from his rigorous training schedule. “Lucanis?” She blushed deeply.

“Did you rest well, little ghost?” He asked, turning around with a smile. His apron had ‘Kiss the cook….or else’ embroidered on the front, underneath a knife stabbing menacingly into a juicy tomato.

“I think so,” she smoothed her hair down, hoping she didn’t look too much of a mess this early in the morning. “What are you doing here?”

“You invited me to stay and see Nevarra, remember?” He replied, dipping a spoon in whatever he was cooking. “Here…come taste this,” he offered the spoon to her.

He slipped it past her lips gently, smiling when she let out an approving moan. “Mmmmm, that’s fantastic,” she smacked her lips loudly. “What is it?”

“Triple egg porridge,” he replied, putting just a pinch of salt into the bubbling pot. “My grandmother’s secret recipe.”

“Your grandmother cooks? First Talon of the Antivan Crows?” Mae grinned.

“Who do you think taught me?” He replied, peeking at something in the oven below. The warm rush of heat made her chemise flutter as much as her stomach was. “She wasn’t always First Talon…and an assassin must be well-trained and well-nourished.”

“I’m glad to hear you eat more than pastries and coffee,” she teased, touching his well-toned arm softly.

“I have to keep up my stamina…for you,” he replied in a seductive tone, brushing a strand of her messy hair out of her face.

She thought perhaps he might kiss her, but he turned his attention back to the oven, shifting the heat over so that whatever was baking inside wouldn’t burn. “The bread is almost done and there is sliced fruit prepared in the icebox,” he added, looking back at her. It was an intense and hungry look, like he was craving something other than food.

“You are spoiling me,” she blushed deeply, his gaze making her hot all over.

“It is well within my rights,” he purred, stepping closer to her. “You stopped Solas’ ritual…saved the world from disaster…came to my rescue…became a Exalted Watcher…”

“I did?” Her voice brightened, the tense burden of her mistake suddenly easing from the back of her skull.

“You did,” he replied, putting his hands on either side of her hips. “You were incredible…you are incredible…”

He finally kissed her, his lips soft and delicate and his beard tickling her chin slightly. He parted her mouth gently with his tongue, making a movement so slow and precise that her knees nearly gave out. He pressed her against the kitchen table, lifting her hips so her backside rested atop it. “Lucanis…” she moaned when his lips finally pulled away.

“Yes, mi luna?” He asked, still looking at her with that hungry gaze. His fingers were slowly pulling up her chemise, just cresting it past her trembling knees. His apron was now tented in the front, teasing her with what was underneath.

“What about the food…I…don’t want it to get cold…?” she let out a heavy breath, her mouth hanging open with its own hunger.

“We’ll keep it well warm in here,” he replied, pulling her chemise past her thighs and letting one of his hands reach between her legs.

“Uhhhuh,” she gasped, his mouth finding hers again.

He kissed her deeply, the flavor of that sweet, custard-like porridge on his tongue. She melted against him, wrapping her arms around his waist and pulling desperately at his apron strings. It fell to the floor in a whisper, revealing a sparse dusting of dark hair across his chest and stomach. He might have been called a horse instead of a crow, for the dagger he had between his legs. It was thick and glistening with pre-cum, wobbling against her as she pulled him closer. “Um,” she glanced shyly at it, biting deeply into her lip. “I’ve never had…anything that big…before…and from a mortal…”

“I will go slow, little dove,” he cooed, slipping her chemise over her head so they were both naked.

His hand had remained between her legs, tickling gently along her lips, making them more slick with each stroke. He kissed down her neck, his beard brushing her shoulder as he found the spot that made her squeal lowly. He chuckled and wrapped his lips around it, sucking it gently as she dug her fingers into his back. “Oh…Lucanis,” she whimpered, his own fingers spreading and penetrating her quivering entrance. “Please.”

He kept sucking on her neck, fingering her softly and using his other hand to tease the tip of his cock against her clit. “Please, I want it to be you,” she begged again, her legs shaking with anticipation. His fingers slipped out, quickly followed by the wider spread of his head, guiding himself just past her opening. She cried out loudly, her eyes rolling back as he thrust a little deeper. He moved slowly against her, each circle of his hips pushing a little further in until she found herself completely stuffed like after a Wintersend dinner. “Ohhhhh!” She groaned deeply, clinging tightly to him as her body swayed with ecstasy.

She’d never been fucked by a mortal before, only enjoying the company of spirits until now. But she wanted him to be her first, to feel his warmth inside of her. She lost all thought and reason, drooling against his mouth when it met hers again. Their lips sucked loudly together, adding a discordant melody to the wet rhythm of their hips. Sweat began to bead off their bodies and join together, the kitchen now blazing hot. Mae might have found herself parched, but Lucanis’ mouth gave her all the moisture she needed. She came loudly into it, her sharp whimper quieted against his tongue. It was as close to death as she had ever come and it was absolutely exquisite. She panted against his shoulder as he continued to fuck her, each loud suck of her cunt making him moan softly. She gasped for air, now desperately thirsty and trying to find his mouth in the lingering darkness of her climax. She blinked her eyes open, searching for him, only to realize she wasn’t in Nevarra. She was in the Lighthouse, in the Fade, in reality.

Her mouth was dry, likely still a little dehydrated from her bout of sea sickness days before. Her heart was racing and one of her hands was pressed tightly between her legs. Her fingers and small clothes were sticky, the wet cloth clinging against her throbbing vulva. She let out a disappointed groan, remembering the mess she had caused. The world was in chaos because of her and here she was fantasizing about some perfect new life. She closed her eyes tightly, wanting to return to that dream. She’d felt happy and loved, everything she had ever wanted in life. She didn’t feel like a failure, like someone who had been abandoned at birth, and raised by spirits and Mortalitasi that couldn’t offer her the affection she so desperately craved. She needed peace and relief, even just for a moment.

She shifted her hips slightly, allowing her to roll them gently against her fingers. She bit deeply into her lip, the pressure of her hand offering a bit of comfort. “Mmmhhhhh,” she grunted softly, letting her fingers pull her small clothes to the side. She let out a dry gasp as she slipped two of them inside her, no where near the perfect sensation in her dream, but good enough for now. She was terribly thirsty, but could get up for a drink after she finished. “Corvio,” she whispered quietly, unable to bring herself to utter Lucanis’ name, embarrassed by her sudden desire for him. She’d heard the term uttered by a sex worker as they walked through Treviso, as the woman was trying her best to seduce some other Antivan Crow who was leaned close to her.

She could only guess the meaning, but it felt like a fitting nickname to put upon her lust. The city had been a bevy of attractive faces, all of them still finely dressed and groomed despite the Antaam occupation. She could’ve chosen any of them to fantasize on, but something about Lucanis reached deep inside her, beyond lust. She yearned for something like the unspoken passion between Teia and Viago, the gentle touches and affectionate looks they shared even when they were discussing business. Lucanis had a natural grace, despite his slightly awkward demeanor due to Spite. He sheathed his daggers with an unconscious flourish. He moved through the crowded streets like a dance. The elegance of his kills stirred something macabre in her. They didn’t suffer unless he wanted them to, offering them a swift and painless death. The Venatori that had grabbed her in the Ossuary had tried to apologize for it, his mouth hanging open after Lucanis had pulled him off her with a quick thrust of his dagger. The assassin had paused just for a moment to check on her, his eyes meeting hers as the Venatori slid off his blade with a loud groan.

What did he even think of her? He was the ‘mage-killer’ after all. He seemed slightly off-put at her being Mortalitasi, perhaps more-so than the others. Yet he’d squeezed her hand when she’d spoken some parting rites for his grandmother and she’d seen him staring at her when she’d gone to do the same. Was he interested in her or was she just reading too much into things? She couldn’t help but let her thoughts linger on his face as she writhed against her fingers. His lips curled into a slight smirk when he smiled and he crinkled his prominent nose when he heard something he didn’t like. His dark eyes were bright and expressive despite his exhaustion. And then there was the demon that kept him awake, Spite.

The sheer will he must possess to resist being taken over completely amazed her. It was likely that determination that had drawn Spite to Lucanis in the first place, the drive to outdo, to be the best. And why didn’t his presence bother her like most demons did? Was he somehow different? Did she desire the demon as much as the man? If spirits could be swayed by their hosts to exhibit stronger emotions, to shift more into a demonic form, could a demon be swayed to soften their emotions and become more like a spirit? Could they have an equilibrium? She’d experienced passion with other spirits, even aside from Vorgoth, so it would be nothing new to her, aside from having a mortal alongside him. She could summon Vorgorth right now and be filled in a way she desired. But she kept her other hand gripped tightly against the chaise, moving her hips more urgently against the other.

It was again that affection that she craved more than anything, that only mortals could offer her. Even a Spirit of Compassion’s comfort could not compare to a gentle hand across her back or the soft nuzzle of warm breath as someone whispered in her ear. She whimpered quietly as the chaise creaked from her determined hips, thinking about the subtle brush of Lucanis’ fingers as he’d reached to hold her hair back when she was sick over the side of the boat. They were long and slender like hers. Would they feel the same inside her as her own? She squeezed her muscles tightly against them as she reached climax, letting out a panting whine as her entire body tensed and then was released into a moment of dark ecstasy. “Oh…mmmmmhhh…fuck,” she gasped, swallowing all the saliva that had filled her mouth thinking about him. It soothed her dry throat for the moment and she lay slack on the chaise as she caught her breath.

“Hmmmmmm…” she let out a heavy sigh, the light of the aquarium glistening off the threads of arousal that clung to her fingers when she pulled them out of herself.

She was satisfied but lonely, hugging her arms around herself for a moment before she climbed off the chaise. She shifted her panties back into place, her thighs squishing as she padded over to the small wardrobe to put something on so she could grab something to drink. The Veiljumpers had given her a few items of clothing, since most of her things had likely been tossed out from the room she, Varric, and Harding had rented in Minrathous. She thought about stopping in to ask Varric for advice, the protagonists of his books all smooth as silk when it came to flirting.

She decided not to bother him while he was still recovering and while she was still squishing like pudding with every step. “Damn it,” she sighed as she reached for the empty pitcher next to the wardrobe, hoping she could wash up in the basin before venturing out in search of a drink. She slipped her panties down instead, dabbing herself with the dry parts of the fabric before stashing them somewhere until she could wash them. She pulled on the suede coat she’d been given, long enough to cover her nakedness, but easy to slip off once she could have a proper wash. She smoothed her messy hair down and tied it into a bun before putting on a pair of Dalish slippers. They kept the bottom of her feet warm at least, her toes wiggling against the cold stone floor as she left her room. Bellara was awake already, her nose buried in one of the many books lining the library shelves. “Morning,” she said without looking up. “Or…afternoon…it’s still so hard to tell here.”

“Let’s just call it morning when everyone wakes up, I suppose,” Maene replied, seeing Bellara rubbing her eyes as she continued to read. “That is if everyone does actually get some sleep once in a while.”

“Ahhh, I know,” she yawned loudly, covering her mouth with her hand. “There’s just so much to do…so much to research.”

“Which you will forget if you are exhausted,” Maene clicked her tongue, hoping to convince the elf to get some rest.

“I promise I’ll sleep after finishing this chapter…or section…”

“Alright, just don’t make me dose you with a sleeping potion and put you in the infirmary next to Varric.”

Bellara finally looked up at her with a sad smile, wondering if her manner of grief was a Mourn Watch thing or not. Bellara hadn’t met Varric, much to her own disappointment, but she could certainly understand not wanting to let him go. “I think Lucanis made breakfast,” she tried to sound uplifting. “I’ve just been snacking on these Dalish cookies.” There was a small pouch of dry-looking disks on the table next to her, sprinkled with some sort of nut.

“Hopefully there is something to drink too,” Maene swallowed hard, her throat feeling like sandpaper.

She walked across the courtyard, the tepid air of the Fade somehow both fresh and dank at the same time. Harding was out on one of the rickety walkways, tossing stones into the void and practicing moving them when they bounced off the barrier that protected the Lighthouse from the rest of the Fade. “I think I am getting the hang of this, Rook!” She waved, her lapse of concentration sending one of the rocks clattering against the building. “Shit!”

“Keep at it!” Maene waved with a laugh.

She continued on towards the dining hall, curious if and what Lucanis had made for breakfast. She squeezed her thighs together as she recalled her dream and the sweet taste of both the porridge and his mouth. She let out a deep breath as she pushed open the door, expecting to find him awake inside. The hall was empty, though the table had several covered dishes scattered atop it. There were seasoned potatoes in one dish, with another holding scrambled eggs with some sort of pungent cheese on top. She passed those over for now, lifting up the last lid to find a platter of cut fruit. She popped one of the juicy chunks into her mouth, letting out a quiet moan as the liquid soothed her throat.

She didn’t see any of the barrels of fresh spring water they’d brought back from Treviso and guessed they were still in the pantry. She walked towards the door, stopping when she heard muffled breathing coming from inside. Her own breath caught in her throat, wondering if he was simply working out again or doing something a little more exciting. She felt her cunt twitch, a chill shuddering up her spine at the thought of it. “Blighted Gods, Mae…get your mind out of the gutter,” she shook off the shiver, her stiffened nipples rubbing against the supple suede of her coat.

She let out a longing sigh and turned back towards the table, finally noticing that he had set out a pitcher of something to drink. She settled into a chair, furtively slipping one of the cloth napkins under her backside to keep from staining her new coat with arousal. She dug into her plate, reaching for seconds as she swallowed mouthfuls of cold-pressed juice, a sweet melange of all the fruits that had been cut up. The flavors were unfamiliar and a little spicy for her bland Nevarran palate, but she found herself eating until she was absolutely stuffed. She let out a low groan when she could swallow no more, her belly bloating against her tightly buttoned coat. Lucanis emerged from the pantry as she was contemplating undoing a few of the buttons, his brow beaded in sweat and his breath a little raspy. “Mae,” he huffed, almost sounding surprised to see her. “I thought you were still asleep…er…I assumed that you were.”

“I woke up early,” she shifted, his flushed skin and the scent of his exertion making her restless. “I was very…thirsty…you know…from being ill, probably…this was very good, by the way. Is this traditional Antivan cuisine? The spices, I mean…I’ve had eggs and potatoes before,” she began to ramble nervously to keep her mind off the undershirt that clung to his body.

“I suppose so,” he flashed that curled smile that made her ball her fists tightly in her lap with lust. “It’s just how it was always prepared for me when I was younger…so I make it that way now.”

“Where does an assassin learn to cook?” She asked, trying to hide a squeak as he reached over her for the pitcher of juice. His spicy musk filled her nostrils, and she felt an ooze of honey creep down her perineum and onto the napkin underneath her.

“My grandmother taught me,” he replied, pouring himself a glass and taking several long gulps, his chest undulating as he let out a relieved sigh. “She raised me after my parents were killed. She said a ‘malnourished assassin was a dead assassin.’”

“Oh…I’m so sorry,” Maene frowned, tempted to reach out to offer him a consoling touch, but knowing that the intent would be tainted by her lust.

“It was long ago,” he furrowed his brow, plating up some food for himself. “I hardly remember them anymore.”

“But still good memories, I hope?” She unclenched her fists and rested them on her belly, her lust turning to loneliness once again.

“Yes,” he murmured taking a slow bite of food, his grief long since past, but unresolved. It would be the same for his grandmother, diving into his contract for killing the gods to alleviate his sorrow. “What about your family? Are they still in Nevarra?”

“I don’t…have any…that I know of…at least…blood relatives. I was found abandoned in the Necropolis as an infant. I don’t know if my parents were killed or they just didn’t want me…”

“How could they not want you?” He said with a little too much yearning, shifting his gaze down to his plate. “I mean…you’re a very talented mage…and…tall…” He couldn’t think of any other word right now besides beautiful.

“I suppose it’s useful for…reaching high shelves,” she chewed her lip.

“There’s actually something in the pantry that you could grab for me later,” he tried to joke, glancing at her with a smile.

“Sure thing,” she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear like she always did when she was flustered.

He wanted to buy her something to hold it back with, knowing that a strand of hair in the eyes could be a liability in a fight. It’s why he kept the top of his hair short. It might also be his unconscious desire to start courting her, as silly as it sounded given the state of the world and the danger of Spite. “Do you think we could get a wagon through the Eluvians?” He asked, a list of staples and dried goods already started in the pantry. “Most of the food in the larder is of suspect quality, not to mention how or if it ages and spoils in this strange place. Hauling everything by hand will become tiresome.”

“Perhaps a small one,” she mused, wondering if the three-egg porridge in her dream was a real thing that the Fade had manifested through his own thoughts to hers. It had been accurate about his grandmother teaching him to cook. “Or maybe Bellara can think up some sort of arcane sled to transport things through.”

“Once we get it figured out, we can head back to Treviso and stock up on things.”

“Sounds good…I don’t want my god-killer getting malnourished,” she blushed, quickly wishing she hadn’t implied sole ownership over him.

“Haaa! She’s claimed us,” Spite chimed in, sniffing loudly around her. “I can almost smell her desire…musk…mmmmm…yes…” He got on his hands and knees, smelling the back of her chair like a dog.

“Stop it!” Lucanis snapped, kicking towards the incorporeal form and hitting her chair leg instead. “Sorry,” he looked at Mae sheepishly. “He’s being a nuisance again.”

“Living up to his name, I suppose,” she gave him a look of understanding. “Perhaps I could…speak with him? Negotiate some benefit for him so he would lay off you?”

“Yes!” Spite bellowed as Lucanis shook his head.

“I don’t think that would be a good idea,” Lucanis glared, seemingly at nothing.

“I want to talk to her! Let me talk to her!” Spite shouted, nearly drowning out Mae’s response.

“I promise it would be safe,” she replied.

“No,” Lucanis insisted, feeling the bite of Spite’s wrath bloody his nose after his refusal.

“Lucanis!” Mae gasped, reaching out to grab a napkin to staunch the blood.

“It’s fine…I’m fine,” he gently grabbed her hands so she wouldn’t fuss over him. “He did this is the Ossuary as well when he didn’t get his way.”

“It’s not fine,” she insisted, handing him the napkin so he could clean himself up. “He shouldn’t be able to hurt you.”

“I’ve had worse from weaker foes,” Lucanis grumbled.

“Still…he needs to learn…boundaries…I have experience communing with spirits…and I know how to protect myself from possession…in case he felt the urge to…jump bodies.”

“Ohhhh would that I could, my sweet Mae,” Spite reached out to touch her, his spectral hand only disappearing into her. “The things I could do with that body…”

“I don’t think he could, even if he wanted to,” Lucanis continued to glare at the demon as Spite continued to uselessly paw at her. “He’s stuck with me.”

“You could still likely come to some sort of accord,” she shivered, feeling a chill throughout her body. “Demons and spirits have their own desires…perhaps just revenge for what Zara did to you both?”

“She’s right about that,” Spite nodded, finally settling down a little. “I want revenge…and I want you to fuck Mae, so I can feel it too.”

“I’ll…think about it,” Lucanis answered them both, his loins already tingling for her.

[stepswowdsen]

【KagePro】 KuroEne AU: Kuroha tries to provoke Ene into attacking him

(CW: Sexually suggestive dialogue, Saeru being a freak)

Summary:

KuroEne AU: Kuroha tries to provoke Ene into attacking him and Ene refuses, an answer that he accepts.

Sen's Meow Meow Mf Faves (^-^)

Route XX: ShinEne

I really wanna draw a KuroEne art at some point so I can caption it with:

“I’ll come to you as both your lover and executioner.”

I love imagining KuroEne as that whole "I will come to you as your lover and your executioner" trope

It's such a sexy ship OH MY GODDD

Utterly perfect for my tastes of dark eroticism. Kid me had such good taste

It fits them sooooo perfectly irt Kuroha/Saeru being the main antagonist/villain who’s responsible for (almost everything bad that happens) and the time loop tragedy in KagePro.

Sen's Meow Meow Mf Faves

Ashiya Douman vs. Dioscuri Anthology Comic by AU (@/delete_au)

Magi: Ch. 251 & Ch. 253

Outer Science MV by Sidu

My smiley (^-^) meow meow faves have that very specific dark silhouette smile trope.

Douman. Judar. Kuroha.

KuroEne

Just had a thought about a KuroEne idea that goes something along the lines of:

Kuroha: Hehehe… Such passionate words, Ene.

Kuroha: I wonder… Did you prefer my lies or truths?

Kuroha: Did they (your past selves) prefer when our relationship was built on lies or truths?

Kuroha: ...Or perhaps both?

Kuroha: Love me, hate me… It’s all the same in the end…!

Kuroha: Your love and hatred… your yearning and desire... and your sorrows and grief… They are all nourishment to me. They all feed my desires in the end.

KuroEne AU: Kuroha tries goading Ene into hurting him

Not posting the whole thing cuz my KuroEne AU dialogue scripts are GIANT...

So I'll just post a snippet from it.

At some point their sex would go like this:

Kuroha: Hurt me and make me feel pain!

Ene: Wtf no 😭

Me: Oh I just looked through my KuroEne AU dialogue scripts. I found the first one that’s a huge masterpost of KuroEne ideas, the first one I ever wrote.

I just found some dialogue scripts of KuroEne getting intimate with each other as both Enemies and Lovers. I should revamp them sometime…

(This is not the first of the batch, but it's from the first KuroEne AU dialogue script doc)

Me: Just thought of it but a KuroEne idea where they're Enemies and Lovers and Kuroha tries to taunt Ene into hurting him during their intimacy but she just refuses. Ene is really too nice for that.

Kuroha: Hurt me! Make me feel pain! Direct your anger and your love and hatred towards me—

Kuroha: ...You won't do it? How come?

Kuroha: Or could it be, that even now, you are chasing after your beloved, even when he's a monster wearing his face? (*)

Note: Talking about Haruka.

F: You know... when I read the first sentences, I was really happy and I was passionate about life, but after reading that last part... I still feel the same except I was emotionally stabbed. Ene wouldn't dare to hurt anyone here, I just can't imagine that :<

Me: I feel like Ene would tell him, "Oh, dream on, if you think I'm gonna stoop to your level!"

Ene: ...You must've seen it from the other mes. When I do it, I want my partner to feel good. I'll do it tenderly.

Kuroha: (...)

And Kuroha/Saeru goes like "..." and decides to accept that answer. So he lets it go.

F: She's more of a uh... "hurt with words" type. Verbal violence, I think? Verbally aggressive. Even then, she doesn't really go too harsh with it, just teasing and minor insults every now and then

Me: Yeah like she's more so the type to counter him verbally

F: > “Dream on, if you think I’m gonna stoop to your level!”

This is hot. She's threatening him with a sentle gex 💔

Me: HAHA. It's cuz there's no way that Ene would be a harsh top. When she tops, she will be gentle loving and considerate.

F: ‼️

F:

Kuroha: A little bite won't hurt now... or maybe a choke? Or perhaps... bondage?

Me: Saeru who is trying to tempt her into other things... of course he would.

F: Classic Saeru, what were we expecting from him really?

Me: I always imagined that she reaches out for his hand to hold and intertwine fingers with him when she tops him.

F: 💖

F: AWWWWEEE this is cute, gotta admit <3

Me:

Kuroha: (!)

Kuroha: (Kuroha notices Ene reaching out for his hand, and intertwines his fingers with hers.)

Kuroha: I do find it endearing… how you're still being so gentle and considerate with this.

Kuroha: How you want to make me feel good.

Kuroha: Knowing that you’re still so concerned with my pleasure… makes me crave you more.

Kuroha: ……It’s exactly like you, isn’t it?

Me: 1st and 3rd she could be talked into and agree to. Biting and bondage, I mean.

I can't imagine Ene being comfortable with consensually choking someone so she'd refuse.

F:

"My body is invincible, do whatever you want with it…"

"What if I refuse?"

"Why? Are you scared of hurting me? ',:)"

F: She'd most likely bite tho :D

Me: Yeah I agree she'd bite him!

F: Neck, collarbone, shoulders, the typical spots :^)

Me: Yeah and even though he could heal them with Awakening Eyes if he wanted, he just lets the marks/hickies stay.

Me:

Ene: I refuse. That's... that's just not my style!

Kuroha: How come? Are you scared of hurting your beloved's body? His body? Or mine?

F:

Ene: …You sure know how to provoke a person like me, don't you?

Me: This line is 💗

Me:

Kuroha: This body is invincible... Do as you please.

Ene: Unlike you... I'm not the violent type! Ene is a delicate flower, I'll have you know!

Ene: I’m going to make you feel good, just like you’ve done for me, and that’s that.

Kuroha: (......)

Kuroha: ...I see. That's just like you, isn't it? Very well... If you insist. I accept your answer.

Ene: ...Is it true that you know everything about me?

...

F: Well... so Kuroha is a masochist, I mean... yeah he wouldn't get hurt so it's explainable but omg he sounds so desperate it's like he wants pain 😭

Me: Yeah I see Kuroha/Saeru as a sadomasochist. Mainly a sadist, but he tries to provoke Ene into hurting him because he wants to see if he can get a new outcome and see if he could possibly push her to that point

Also there's the fact that he's never truly threatened (by his partner) because of Awakening Eyes. Even if he did get hurt, he could just heal and regenerate.

Me: The way I see it is that Kuroha/Saeru likes seeing "strong emotions" being directed towards him, no matter what kind. It's cuz love and hatred and greed, etc., all feed his ego.

Saeru's "attachment" isn't really like Douman's attachment. It's like Saeru’s committance to keep the game going as long as all those strong emotions are being directed towards him.

F: Just for fun? Or does is that an actual goal he wants to achieve to get something out of it?

Me:

Ene: No. I’m not gonna do it. There's just no way. I won’t hurt you…

Ene: And doing the opposite of what you want is always a plus~ 🎵

Ene: Why don’t you let me take charge this time~? I’ll do it for you!

Me: Yeah I'd say just for fun. Cuz once Ene establishes that she's not gonna do it after trying to provoke her into doing it, he's satisfied with her answer and lets it go.

Her answer to him is "to lie with her S/O tenderly." So he will accept that.

F: "Trust me, because you wouldn't even have a single bruise on you. <3"

Me: Saeru first blinks in surprise in response to Ene saying this, but then smirks like, "Oh~? Really?"

...

Me: > "How about choking me?"

Also yeah, I feel like Ene wouldn't like anything resembling hands wrapping around the neck...

Ofc that only happens in Routes similar to Route XX, but still...

Just gonna put this for context just in case it's needed.

Losstime Memory’s Route XX has a metaphorical representation of Shintaro killing Ene by wrapping his hands around her neck.

Irt KagePro’s Music Route, Losstime Memory’s Route XX leads to the events of Outer Science.

Me: Good god the misunderstandings between ShinEne (platonic or as ship) are so :'^)

I care about them... I mainly see their dynamic as platonic but I like seeing it as ship too.

In Route XX, Shintaro sinks further into his depression, believing that Ene is only a "neighbour/stranger" who lives in his computer who is incapable of truly understanding him.

While Ene tries to cheer him up and telling him he should pay attention only to her and move onto the future and make connections with other people, and ultimately fails to reach him.

She fears that if left to his own devices, he'd give into his self-loathing and suicidal impulses.

The lyrics of Artificial Enemy before Shintaro deletes Ene has a line something like "I've gotten bored of you, a toy that is only good for talking to"

Shintaro imposes a sense of distance between them and chooses to drown in his solitude/loneliness, can't move on from his guilt and can't move onto the future

But the thing is, Ene saw herself (the way she lived previously as Takane) and knew him before as his classmate back when she was still alive/human, so she really does understand the kind of loneliness he experiences...

F: Did you just stab me.

Correction: Any hand-wrapping near the neck (*)

Let her hug Saeru by wrapping her arms around his neck 💔

Me: Yeah that's what I meant to say. Yeah she would still hug him and wrap her arms around his neck

[stolitzsings]

💖, 🖋 and 👨‍👩‍👧 for the ask game! (I probably got at least one of the emojis wrong but hopefully they still make sense 😂) - @blitzwhore

💖 What do you like most about your own writing?

Can't believe you're gonna make me think of something nice to say about myself 🤣 I've been told I have a very "lyrical" style of writing, and sometimes I'll write a sentence or paragraph that flows really well and just Hits. I love those moments when I feel like I've really nailed it at a word-for-word level.

👨‍👩‍👦 Do you tell people in real life that you write fic?

Most people in my life know I do writing of some sort, but I'm pretty vague with the details lol. I only talk about writing fic with irl friends who also write/read fic (and I don't tell most of them that I write smut, just bc I know it isn't their jam). I told my therapist I write "character studies," because what is smut if not horny character analysis? 🤣

🖋 Post a snippet from a current WIP

Putting this one under the cut!

Ok I was a little nervous about sharing this because it's from a longer AU I've been toying around with, and historically I'm very bad at sticking to longer projects. But regardless of what I do with it I had a lot of fun writing this scene of M&M tormenting Blitz lmao

Blitz could feel his face heating up. “He isn’t— It’s not like—” Fuck, he was losing this one fast. “Okay, so maybe we’re boning or whatever, but it’s just a casual thing, you know? It’s not like we’re dating or anything.” Moxxie raised an eyebrow. It was almost impressive how smug he looked. “Who said anything about dating?” “I think he just did, babe.” Okay, now they were getting on his nerves. He could feel his spines starting to bristle.  “Look. It’s just a convenience thing, ‘kay? He gets to have his bad boy fantasy, and I get a reliable fuck who I know won’t steal my kidneys while I’m asleep.” It wasn’t like Stolas would ever really consider a relationship with someone like him. Disowned or not, he was still a royal. And that was fine! Blitz didn’t want anything complicated, anyway. Fucking was easy. It was comfortable. It was all either of them was looking for.  “If you say so, sir.” Moxxie had somehow dialed the smugness up to eleven.  Blitz rolled his eyes and walked towards the door. “I’m firing both of you. And I’m keeping your shares for today.” He was pretty sure Moxxie started to say something in response, but he was out the door before he heard it.  He let himself stew as he made his way down to the parking lot. “Looking for excuses,” for fuck's sake. They were hired killers! What did they expect? He was going to get injured sometimes. And it only made sense to go see Stolas, who knew more about this shit than any of them did. Besides, a quick fuck sesh was good for you, or something. Boosted your sero-whatever levels. Got your blood pumping. It was basically healthcare, anyway. Talk about a bedside manner, he thought to himself, grinning. He made a mental note to use that one with Stolas later. He'd think it was funny.

“C’mere, B, let me take a look at that scratch for you.” Millie had opened up their first-aid kit and had just finished bandaging a shallow cut on her thigh. Blitz looked down at the wounded arm that she’d gestured to. It wasn’t serious— an annoyance, more than anything. He shrugged. “Eh, that’s okay. I’ll just have my guy take a look at it.” Millie eyed him skeptically, like she was trying to catch him in a lie. “You know, you’ve been spending an awful lot of time with this mysterious “guy” of yours lately.” Moxxie looked up from his paperwork with a conspiratorial smile. “You’ve been seeing him for everything, even minor injuries. Almost like you’re looking for excuses to pay him a visit.” Oh great, the famous M&M tag team. “What? No, I haven’t.” Even he knew he sounded defensive. “Sure looks that way to me.” Millie crossed her arms and perched on the edge of the desk so that she and Moxxie could give him the double stare-down. Cute. “Are you sure that medical attention’s all he’s been giving you?”

Thank you for the ask @blitzwhore! I'm still answering these prompts if y'all are curious 😊

[blood-mocha-latte]

I would love to see "Dear Wormwood" and "Pale White Horse" for the Oh Hellos asks... Any pairings but maybe a nice Winnix or a Luztoye? Or some gen Brotherly Man Angst?

Full Disclosure: this is actually a long-winded fic that I’ve been chewing on for the past three or so months, so I figured posting a snippet of it as both a preview and a drabble request would be a good way of releasing some of my Brain Demons. I hope you enjoy <3

“You have always been there in my mind.” – Dear Wormwood

“The sight held me fixed like a bayonet against my throat.” – Pale White Horse

---

July 1967, Nighttime

Joe watched him as he picked his way closer to the stands, waving and saying something or the other every two seconds to some stranger as he got steadily closer.

It was always the same, seeing George. Like he couldn’t breathe, like for a brief moment, letting even just his gaze settle on the other was enough to cut his throat. 

“Thought you wouldn’t come!” He shouted over the din of the crowded basement, felt warm as George’s gaze snapped towards him, the way that his whole face seemed to become brighter.

“The diner closed early!” He shouted back, holding what looked like a cardboard box from the restaurant above his head. “I had to run to get down here, but it seems worth it!”

George hit the side of the ring easily, the bottom of it coming up to the middle of his chest, and held up the box higher. Joe snorted, reached down to take it from him before dropping to sit, cross-legged, to meet his eyes more fully.

“Guess so,” He said absently, pushing the lid of the box open with two fingers before letting it drop closed again. “Sandwiches?”

“Two.” George confirmed, resting his elbows near Joe’s knees as he looked up at him, eyes warm and bright. “For after.”

As he finished speaking, his words were almost drowned out as the crowd began to swell again, ever growing and ever louder. Joe didn’t bother to look behind him, knew it was something to do with the other man in the ring. George wrinkled his nose, careful, and it made Joe want to laugh, the urge smothered somewhere between his ribs and his throat.

“I forget how loud it is here.” George shouted to him, eyes crinkled at the corners, and Joe watched him for entirely too long before looking away. He placed the box in front of him carefully and pushed it back towards George with his fingertips. 

“Feels like it’s always getting louder!” He shouted back, dropping his hands back into his lap, the scratchy wrap over his knuckles serving only as a minor annoyance. George’s gaze was near hesitant, cast somewhere over Joe’s shoulder.

“Who’re you against tonight?” He asked, eyes moving back to Joe’s face slowly, light and curious. Joe shrugged, barely cared.

“Some guy.” He said, didn’t want to expand on it. “What’d you study today?” George’s eyes sparked.

He hadn’t put anything in his hair, and it had grown out, slightly; curling around his ears and parting around his face. It looked nice. Joe considered telling him so and decided against it.

“Some guy.” He said back. “Either learnin’ about them or fightin’ them.”

Joe huffed, looked somewhere over George’s shoulder at the mess of people yelling behind him, jostling each other and everything else. Underground fights were always more hectic than he was ever expecting. “Guess so.” He rasped.

When he met George’s gaze again the other's face was unreadable, warm and careful and a thousand other words that Joe wasn’t smart enough to find. “I’m alone for the rest of the night.” He told Joe, tilting his head enough to glance to the side. “Frank is out until Thursday on some assignment.”

“I’ll drop by.” Joe said, before he could think to say something else, and George watched him carefully, still warm but slightly more apprehensive.

“I don’t like being stood up.” He said, a bit of a warning, and Joe winced, slightly. 

“I fucked up, last time.” He said, low, leaning further forward on his knees to get closer to George, shifting to rest both wrists on the taut rope between them. The changed angle seemed slightly more private, less unobstructive, though everyone was still screaming and everywhere was still crowded.

“Yeah, you did.” George told him, solemn, but the corner of his mouth crooked up soon after, and he shifted, resting the sandwich box between his hip and forearm. He was still leaning against the raised platform of the ring and reached forward with his free hand, pressing a finger to Joe’s chin before shifting to press his palm to his jaw.

He leaned in before Joe could think to pull back, pressing his mouth to the space just below his cheekbone and whispering a soft good luck, soft lips and warm breath and smelling, vaguely, of chlorine.

It gave Joe pause, unable to do anything to breathe George in before he was pulling back just as quickly, stepping away from the platform, fingertips shifting to press to the seam of his own lips.

“Fight hard.” He said, taking another step backwards. “I’ll wait for you.”

Joe blinked, looked vaguely around at nothing. No one had saw that, he knew, the effect of being completely alone because everything was too crowded. His cheek was still warm.

“Okay.” He finally managed to say, hoarser than he’d like to be, and the crowd had already swallowed George completely.

[flfverse]

I just finished reading and came here to do the mandatory author stalk routine after reading a masterpiece and saw you posted like,,, today ajshahsha.

I guess I just wanted to tell you how much I love FFIFYH and how excited I was to see you are still active here (I have serious ptsd from authors I love just vanishing and never knowing if they're okay or not ahshahs).

Also, this AU is so good, I'd seen some fics with a similar vibe but wow this one is just SO detailed and good. I honestly think I discovered so much about myself when reading bc I related to some of the stuff like yeah man I want someone to take care of me like Dabi does for Hawks ahshahsha.

Anyway sorry for the little rant, hope you have a wonderful week!!!

ahhh don’t apologize, all of you are being so nice to me lately <3 i’m so glad you like it! i definitely feel you on authors vanishing, it sucks, but at least for now i am Determined to see this story through, even if it takes, like, forever. my birthday is soon so i would love to finish a chapter or oneshot or something for it, but i dont know, bc of the existence of School and Work. maybe at the very least i’ll post a snippet or something