#in heaven there wouldn't be dust on everything

[1111-sunset-circle]

this post got me thinking about bodies and the way that we fit together with our f/os. do your fingers interlock perfectly? does their palm seem to rest perfectly on the small of your back? how do you match up with each other when you’re cuddling or hugging?

[funnyexel]

it's the stalker.

he was entranced.

by you.

the way your breasts moved freely under your shirt as you fumbled with your curtains after experiencing a brief moment of eye contact. It was heaven. he felt like he died ascended and descended all in a matter of seconds. he couldn't ask for more in the moment. seeing your irises widen then focus on his distant figure, in a split of fear.

but you.

you were alarmed. alarmed by the staring of a random man. you hastily undid your curtains and shut them as fast as you could. quickly your body took you to your door and make sure you locked it. you took a much needed breath but that didn't stop your chest from violently moving up and down. your heart pounding in your ears as you leaned against the door briefly before leaving to go back to what you were previously doing.

you thought that eye contact was bad. but it got worse. you didn't think when bags and bags of things kept showing up to your door. at first small packages that you mindlessly brought inside your home, then, undisguised bags of luxury items and items you wanted but wouldn't buy just as yet. you were warned not to open them but you couldn't help but peek.

and they were real. actual items in the bags and you had to check. something in you told you that this couldn't be real. but it surely was.

you still didn't open or wear a thing. it infuriated him. he didn't buy you these things for them to collect dust. but, besides this, he needs to see you. he's aching for you. so he does.

there you were obliviously window shopping because he knows you're too goddamn responsible to buy the things you want. he watched as you paced up and down the isle. analyzing the clothing and silently cursing to yourself when you check the tag. it made his chest rumble from a quiet chuckle. those leggings you wore hugged your body and infatuated your hips to give you a delicious figure.

oh

you bent over to pick up a shirt you knocked it off the hanger and he got the perfect view of your ass. the movement itself was quick and ridded with embarrassment from making something fall. but it still made his trousers annoyingly tight as he gazed at you.

he couldn't hold himself back anymore. he walked into the store. knowing exactly where you were as he walked in nonchalantly. he seemed confident to anyone around, but inside, he was just trembling. he was turning into where you clearly were but you were leaving at the same time, your shoulder nearly brushed against his as you pasted each other. he could feel the heat of your body past him and he could smell the sweet scent of vanilla coming off your person and he nearly rolled his eyes back.

you were too much for his own good.

and just like that you walked out the door like he was nobody. but he knew you felt it, felt that spark when you glided by one another. it was an electric surge and he couldn't rid it from his body. this lead him to pick up everything that caught your eye in the store and buy it.

he was an irresponsible child when it came to you and materialistic things, but he could care less. money comes and goes, he thought. and you are one in a lifetime for him.

he was nervous around you, popping up at places you least expected it and getting ignored by you only fueled his efforts. and he benefited from it. he talked to you.

he talked to you.

it was brief, like every other interaction you had, but it was an everlasting moment in his mind. you bumped into him this time. oh, how much joy he felt when your warm body clashed with his. it even took you a second longer to detach from him than it would a normal person. you were all over him and he knew it.

you politely said excuse me and stared into his eyes. he couldn't even blink, afraid he would miss a single moment in your presence. he imagined you looking back at him when you walked away and even fantasized that there was a smile on your face but who could even be so sure?

him?

not when he was laying down and imagining you were watching him, just as he was stalking watching you. one hand slithering under his boxers to palm himself while the other held his chest. right where you bumped into him. he contemplated never taking off the sweater, let alone washing it. but that had no space in his mind now. it was too busy thinking of you and your alluring scent.

stroking himself to you alone, he could imagine your warmth against him. your mouth, your tits and of course that hole. any one he wanted. because he knew what he meant to you. he was your prize, just as you were his. he had to work for you and you had to work for him. if that means he has to spend nights just aching and pleading for you, then so be it. he needs you. he needs you so bad it can kill him.

and when the time is right, he will come and see you.

he will break those pathetic petty locks of yours and enter your room. he will peel back those layers of sheets you use to cover that lovely body, and his fingers will run down your body, leaving goosebumps in its wake. he will hook his fingers on your skimpy underwear and pull them down to your ankles.

and he will fuck you.

some more stories

a/n: inspired by a dream and no. I cannot elaborate.

[iiotic]

Can I request Alastor, Vox and Angel Dust with a fem reader that deals with souls? like more specifically, she maintains souls, which will die soon, new souls, souls that go to hell, souls that go to heaven and such, she basically knows everything about everyone and owns every soul and can control it if they get in the way of her work

Alastor, Vox & Angel Dust with Fem! Reader who deals with souls

TW - Swearing, mentions of death

༉‧ა°.Vox:

Vox thinks that you have the potential to be his model, his assistant, his lover.

At first he'd want you to stay close to him because he knows that you're absolutely powerful. But as you two get close things start to go in a little different way.

When you told him that you know everything about everyone, knowing every single detail about them he thinks you two are alike!!

I mean he does stalk most of the sinners and hypnotise them through screens

If I should be honest my brain isn't braining right now but overall I think that he'd try to use you at first (just like alastor) and get you to became his assistant or whatever but when he gets to know you he finds out your true power.

Thinks that your ability to control someone through their soul is cool as fuck just as Angel Dust

༻༉Alastor:

You met Alastor at an gala organised by Carmilla for overlords, royal blood and powerful, important beings etc.

He wasn't entirely confused that you already knew who he was. Alastor has a high status in hell being known ass the radio demon and also is quite popular for his radio broadcasts.

When you first told him that you "deal" in souls he thought that you meant making deals for sinners soul. That wouldn't make him any different then you. Then why were you different?

At first you didn't explain shit to him because why would you? But after some time, without The Radio Demon asking you. You explained everything slowly and carefully for him.

Quite impressed! Definitely tried to get on your good side at first to have you on his side.. You told him what you can do but he never actually saw your true power.

After thinking about what you just told him, he questioned himself if you knew about someone's or rather his past.

Still doesn't entirely understand how things work as he already sold his soul.. But pretends like he does

‧꒰ა Angel Dust:

Thinks its cool but doesn't entirely know how this shit works. Like what do you mean you own his soul?? Valentino does.

Thinks its kinda hot when you pushed him out of your way when he disturbed you without even touching him. From now on he absolutely looooves annoying you.

(Annoying you aka. Flirting, getting in the way of your work, saying stupid shit, asking oblivious questions.)

When you first met him he didn't treat you any different ngl.

One day you decided to take him to your "work" because he was dying for you to show him how it works. He was absolutely amazed when he saw everything there!!

Would never tell you that tho. Just says that cool and the conversation ends.

---

(A/N) - sorry if it's bad I wrote it at like 2am it's unedited too

[noirflms]

THE HOUSEHUSBAND LIFE — hq men

haikyuu men as househusbands. or haikyuu men who’d be good househusbands in general.

— ୨୧ ˖ ˚ AKAASHI KEIJI !

he is the one who keeps track of finance in the house , keeps track of how much you should spend even if you get a six-sum salary and love spending it on him even if he doesn't like it because he wants you to save for the future.

he also pretty much cooks all sorts of dishes and morning tea made by him is served to you in bed , he is just the best. buys groceries when you're out to work , keeps the house neat and clean — it's a penthouse so it's not much work as it's not that dirty all the time — keeps track of your health and if you're pretty much not skipping breakfast or lunch cuz he's there to spoon feed you at dinner.

he's not much fan of laundry just knows he has to fold it and keep it neatly in your shared closet and is pretty much a the best husband of all ( according to your mother ).

— ୨୧ ˖ ˚ SUGAWARA KOUSHI !

he is that type of house-husband who actually takes care of the loundry more than cooking and cleaning but still cleans the house just the way you like it — organized and neatly done. he doesn't step in the kitchen for he knows he might burn whatever he cooks so you don't let him step in there , it's either you come home and cook but if your tired , it's take out time!

whenever he does laundry he has a habit of smelling the clothes before folding for he like the smell of the detergent you use and the clothing softener should be if the best company because that is kinda professional when you go to work wearing soft and clean clothes.

dusts around the house with music playing in the background and does all the cleaning while blasting Oliva Rodrigo on the amazon echo you brought so he won't have to go on connecting his phone to the Bluetooth other than that he is just the best husband you could ask for.

— ୨୧ ˖ ˚ KITA SHINSUKE !

he is the package , can cook , cleans , does laundry , keeps track of all budgets and savings , knows every nook and cranny of the house and is happy being a house-husband for you. kita buys the best clothing softener and detergent , is a man of his words for if he promises breakfast in bed for you then you get it.

he sets up the house according to a taste that suits him and you like almsot all the time after seeing it on pinterest — yes HE HAS PINTEREST and you can't change my mind — cooks the best meals like you're in heaven to be eating such delicious meals , laundry is done and the house smells like lavander and you don't know how he does that and he keep it a secret ( it's just him using scented house cleaning stuff ).

grocery shopping is done with you because it's to lonely for him to go out so it's shopping time on the weekends , he is like a stay at home mum but you love him and for god sake who wouldn't want a man like KITA SHINSUKE.

— ୨୧ ˖ ˚ YAMAGUCHI TADASHI !

you enter the house with the smell of the most delicious food being cooked and when I say delicious , it's over the top delicious. he loves cooking so much that he forgets he has to clean as well and do laundry. yamaguchi almost does everything before stepping into the kitchen and prepare a bento for you in the early morning with starting to think for dinner — even though lunch is not even thought out yet — and what to be baked when your home.

it may not seem like but he has a passion for baking good for you.

he blasts playlist made for him by you and tsukki , and does the cleaning and laundry because sometimes it's to lonely in the house , he keeps track of time and when you're gonna come so he could prepare a bubble bath and then start with the cooking so you could have been relaxed and come eat with him.

when it's a weekend , he wakes up late but the breakfast is in his hands to be cooked , and in the evening it's time for him and you to have a baking session and you cherish this baby more than anything.

NOIRFLMS 2024 ! all rights reserved - plagiarism is a crime , do not translate my works without permission.

[save-the-villainous-cat]

mother. enemies with benefits with angst, mother🙏🙏 I am starving in this harsh winter, mother 😔😔😔

"Your mission," the villain murmured. "How was it?"

"Is that a thing we do now? Asking personal questions?"

"It's work. And we are work, too."

The hero didn't really know what to respond to that, so they shrugged and avoided the villain's gaze at all costs. It was kind of pathetic that the villain was the first person they visited after their three months of absence. Logically, the villain must have assumed that the hero was here to sleep with them.

In truth, the hero wasn't sure if they could even do that. They could barely walk.

"So, how was it?" the villain asked. They tilted their head curiously and the hero didn't know how to respond to that either. The hero counted themselves lucky that the only wounds they carried around with them were bruises and a few cracked ribs.

"It was fine," they said. They took a sip of coffee, ignoring how their face was heating up. "It was alright."

"That bad?"

"No, it was fine, really," the hero answered. The villain's apartment was as the hero remembered. Classy. Clean.

Maybe the hero was just sick of living in their own cramped space and coming home to trash and dust, too exhausted to clean and take care of it. Most of the time the hero blamed work - no hero had truly time to take care of their own place after all, right?

But deep down they knew they were the problem. They were the person who had let the decay happen.

"Still beating yourself up?"

"Still too curious for your own good?"

The villain gave them a hortative look and the hero backed down immediately.

"Sorry, I..." An empty laugh. "I'm really on edge, huh?"

They guessed the last three months weren't as easy to forget as they wanted. They had lost more people during the mission than they should have. It was an excruciating feeling. Something they would never get used to.

"You don't say." The villain smiled softly and stood up. They reached for the hero's wrist and the hero could feel their insides melt. Touching them again after three months...it felt like a reward after weeks of uncertainty and violence.

It was heaven.

"If you are struggling with-"

"Really, I can deal with it, I promise," the hero said. They finally looked up at their nemesis. At those hauntingly beautiful eyes. Those soft fingers. They would dream about them.

They would dream about the villain every now and then. They would think about them.

It was quite strange to the hero. They were thinking about them a little too much, they figured.

"Then why are you here?" the villain said. Their hand was still on the hero's.

"Hm?" The hero needed a second to stomach that question.

"What are you doing here?"

"Well..." Another empty laugh. "We...uh, you know. We hook up sometimes. That's what we do, so...uh..."

"You're not here to have sex with me," the villain replied. They pulled their hand away and the hero could have cursed. They knew it was stupid to feel entitled to it.

And they didn't, they truly didn't feel entitled. But desperate? The hero was definitely desperate.

"What do you mean? Did I-" They took in a deep breath.

"I meant what I said. You're not here to have sex with me. You don't like morning sex, you can barely move and you probably wouldn't survive a round, no matter what position. And you know that. So, why are you here?" The hero stared at them with an open mouth but gathered themselves quickly. Swallowed, looked at the coffee, then back at the villain. It didn't feel fair how well the villain could read them. It didn't feel fair how helpless the hero felt either.

"I just...I don't know."

"You know I can't give you the comfort you want," the villain whispered. This time, it was them who didn't meet the other's eyes. "We agreed on specific terms and...everything on an emotional level..."

"I know," the hero whispered. Hell, it was them who had come up with the whole shit. It was the hero who had argued that emotions were leading to complications. It was them who had insisted that this was physical. "I know, I'm sorry."

"Usually I would just break the rules and...well, you know. I would listen to you, I would hold you and...yeah. But I am kind of seeing someone."

But I am kind of seeing someone.

The hero's eyes widened.

It felt like a punch to the throat.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know, I..." The tears were rising. They could feel the pain in their nose, they could feel that horrible feeling in the back of their throat.

"As long as it's not serious, we can still sleep with each other, but we can't afford falling in love. I really like them."

And then the hero got angry.

Their insides started to boil. They wanted to scream or cry, they wanted to punch the wall and destroy something, anything.

They felt replaced, they felt miserable. Maybe they had come here for comfort or kindness, maybe they had come here because they had actually missed the villain but this? This was cruel - it was a bad joke that kept on going.

These last three months, the thought of the villain was the only thing that had kept them going, the one and only thing the hero had wanted.

But they swallowed it, swallowed their anger and the tears.

"Are you alright?"

"Y-yes." The hero hid their shaking hands under the table.

"You look a little pale," the villain said. They didn't seem very happy about any of this.

"Could I just use your bathroom for a second?"

"Of course."

And there, the hero threw up, gripping the toilet seat with trembling hands and tears blurring their vision.

[bad-and-drawn-that-way]

can I request a Vox x reader fluff where they've both been struggling to come to terms with their feelings but when something (you can decide what) happens and the reader gets hurt really badly, he confesses

ANOOOOOOOOON!! YOU. GET ME. SO GOOD. HOW DARE YOU HIT ME UP WITH ONE OF MY FAVORITE TROPES?? Literally, give this trope to me as many times as yall want. I'll find a million ways to write it. Reap the repercussions and enjoy the food you beautiful homie, you!

Star-Crossed Idiots [Vox x Reader]

Vox refused to believe it.

Velvette had been the one to call him out on his shit first. Unlike him, she had a semblance of emotional maturity that meant she was perceptive to shit that flew over his head entirely. While he didn't understand why he found himself going out of his way to spend time with you, Velvette figured it out in a matter of days. The very fact that he had kept his involvement with you a secret was suspicious in itself. Not to mention, Velvette realized before he did. When she discovered his feelings for you, she found it hilarious. And a touch pathetic.

"I mean really Vox, you have zero reason to even know them," Velvette scoffed as she sipped on the frappuccino he had used to buy her silence. Things were already messy enough with Valentino. He had no intention of the pissy moth hearing of this until whatever this was, was sorted.

"Yet you constantly check in on their phone activity, go out of your way to run into them on the streets, and now they're even working for you just because your needy ass wanted an excuse to see them on the regular," Velvette listed as Vox did everything in his power to avoid eye contact.

Vox buried his face in his hands and groaned while Velvette rolled her eyes. "Wouldn't it just be easier to ask them out at this point? I love you, darling, but you're making this so much more complicated than it needs to be."

"No," Vox growled as he looked up and shot her a warning glare. "Do you have any idea how much shit we'd be in if I just started dating some random sinner? And that's only if the feelings were mutual."

He ran his hand down his screen with a huff, turning to look at Vark swimming up to the glass. While Vox had originally had the aquarium extend to the meeting rooms for a sense of looming intimidation, he'd found quite a bit of comfort in his sharks being able to follow him through the tower.

"Look, for all we know, I'm just pent up," Vox tried to reason. It sounded fake, even to his own ears, but he was in denial. There was too much bullshit he'd have to face if he really was as whipped for you as he feared. "It's been a shit couple of weeks. I probably just need a break and a good fuck and this will all be something you make fun of me about next week for ever entertaining in the first place."

Velvette shook her head, sighing as she pulled out her phone and started to scroll.

"Whatever you say."

---

You refused to believe it.

There was no way you fell for Vox of all people. For starters, you told yourself you'd never love again! Every time you'd tried, disaster followed. It didn't help that any potential match was one to be made in Hell. Granted, you knew not everyone in Hell was bad. There were a lot of sinners who you firmly believed belonged in Heaven or some sort of equivalent.

But even so... Vox was definitely not one of those people. Not that that was the important part or truly mattered. You were no saint either, you were also in Hell.

"I don't see what the big deal is toots," Angel Dust sighed as he watched you give Fat Nuggets attention to keep your hands busy through the stress. "There are worse people to have a crush on."

"There's better too," you whined. "I'd rather not have a crush at all," you muttered bitterly as your hand continued the soothing action of petting the teacup pig.

You'd originally been on the production team for one of Valentino's studios. That was how you befriended Angel Dust and why Vox scooped you out from under Valentino to work on his own set. He told you it was because he valued someone who had an ear for audio balance, but Angel said he'd only offered you the new job after the overlord walked in on the cameraman flirting with you right before.

"Why not just fuck the guy and see if it's a matter of heart or a matter of-"

You laughed as you covered Angel's mouth with one of your hands. "Okay, okay! Don't... finish that sentence. I won't let you taint poor little Fat Nuggets ears with your porn language."

Angel snickered as you pulled back your hand. "But you see my point, right?"

"I do," you sighed. "But that's... not really my style. If anything, I think it'd just hurt to see him after something like a casual fling. The idea of him wanting my body, but not me? Yeah no. I'll choose the healthier option of repressing my feelings, thank you very much."

"I'm telling ya, he's into you," Angel groaned. "I've seen the way he is with people he thinks are hot. I've seen him with Val. You're different, toots."

You smile sadly at Angel and put Fat Nuggets down on the bed. It was clear you didn't believe Angel and he was on the verge of ripping out his fur because of it. The two of you were so unbelievably oblivious it was gonna kill him again. "Thanks, Angie but... it's okay. Really, it is."

He sighed and eventually let it go. The two of you talked about other things for a while before Charlie peeked into his room to ask for your help on something. Once you were gone, he rolled over the conversation in his mind as he tried to think of ways to get the ball rolling on your love life.

Angel shook his head with a sigh and pulled out his phone. He scooped up Fat Nuggets and flopped back in his bed as the dialing sound filled the room. The line connected, and he was quick to the point.

"Hey, I know we don't really talk, but I've got an idea."

---

"Really Angie, I don't think this was necessary," You grumbled as you tugged down on the all-too-short skirt of the outfit he'd squeezed you into.

"Oh, but it was and it is," Angel grinned as he took your hand and twirled you in the entry hall to the club. You rolled your eyes and let him spin you in jest. He'd asked you to come with him to one of your old coworkers' birthday parties.

Apparently, one of the rules was to dress like you'd get hired to dance at the club. At least, that had been Angel's excuse when you questioned why he was hovering over you as he did your hair, and makeup and held up several outfits to your body that you doubted would fit.

Despite the discomfort of getting all dolled up, you were happy he'd invited you. It had been a while since you saw your old friends. That being said, it would have been more fun if you weren't tugging down your skirt every two minutes. You weren't the only one hyperaware of how much of your skin was exposed. Nor of the way the fabric hugged your frame tightly. Several of your old friends had suggested you return to the studio with a job in front of the camera instead of in the shadows of the set.

You'd been having a good time, sticking to the corner of the room with some of your old friends to watch the drinks while the rest were out on the dance floor. One of the drunker sinners of the bunch accidentally knocked over some of the drinks while she'd been telling a story about the recent cam show she did. You volunteered to go get more napkins from the bar. One of your friends came with you to reorder the ruined drinks and the two of you had nearly pushed your way through the crowd when you heard a familiar voice call your name through the noise.

Vox didn't have to fight through the crowd the way you had. The second sinners saw the glow of his screen, they were quick to move out of his path. Your friend touched your arm, pulling your attention away from the approaching overlord. They winked at you and told you they had the drink issue handled.

When you turned, you caught Vox's screen flickering from pink to his usual blue. You had never seen any color other than the "You don't get to sleep" blue light, so you assumed it was just a trick of the flashing dance lights above.

"I didn't think you'd be here," you say to break the tension. This wasn't the first time you'd seen him in casual wear, nor was it the first time you'd seen Vox since realizing you had feelings for him. Even so, your heart was beating hard just from the sight of him.

"A-Ah yeah, well," Vox stammered as the music blared through the busy room. "Velvette wanted to drop by. She said something about wanting to check the place out as a potential venue for an upcoming show."

"Just the two of you?" you ask, perking up slightly.

"It was supposed to be," Vox chuckled dryly. His grin was tired and forced as he looked to the side and scanned the room. "Valentino heard we were coming here and tagged along. I don't know why, but Velvette got really heated about it. Something about him fucking up her plans..."

"Oh," your shoulders drop. You cringe internally, wishing you could take back the bitterness in your voice. You hoped it wasn't too obvious, but the way Vox was looking at you like you were some sort of a puzzle told you everything you needed to know.

You actually loved Velevette. She was sassy and cutthroat but had a kind side to her as well. Valentino however... He'd been the source of a lot of suffering for the people you cared about. While the more obvious examples of Angel Dust returning to the hotel looking like shit came to mind, so did the times you had to comfort Vox after being yanked this way and that by the moth emotionally.

That was actually how you'd realized you'd come to care for him as deeply as you do. He'd been standing alone in one of the meeting rooms with a distant look on his face. When you found him and asked him if he was okay, he tried to play it off with his usual bravado, but couldn't. He never cried in front of you, he only vented his frustrations about Valentino and you listened. You sympathized. And eventually, you found yourself wishing you could be the one to treat him better.

Vox opened his mouth to say something, only for Valentino to slip his arm around his shoulder, appearing out of nowhere from the crowd.

"There you are baby," he purred, his fingers immediately slipping under the collar of Vox's vest. You resisted the urge to gag as Valentino took a long puff from his pipe and blew the majority of the smoke in your direction.

"I was wondering where you up and fucked off to," Valentino grinned as he leaned down to nip drunkenly at Vox's shoulder. "You left me all alone with our little fashionista, "Valentino scoffed. "She's in such a bitchy mood."

If it wasn't bad enough that Valentino was practically drooling all over Vox in front of you and pretending you weren't there, insult was only added to injury when Valentino grinned at you with sharp teeth when he called Velvette bitchy.

"Come back and unwind with me," Valentino hummed as he started to kiss up Vox's neck. "Some of my best toys are here tonight. Don't you want to play?"

If Vox had any doubt he was in Hell before, he had every reason to confirm the fact at this moment. He'd fallen out of love with Valentino, but the almost... the almost killed him. To make it worse, he was completely frozen, letting it all happen in front of you. He made no moves to stop Valentino, he made no moves to reciprocate. He simply froze.

Unable to watch any longer as Vox continued to fall for the very same game of tug-o-war he told you he was done with, you bite your lip and turn on your heel. You can't tell if you heard Vox say your name or if it was just a trick of the crowd.

"Anyone else gonna drink this?" You asked as you rejoined your friends still at the table and pointed to one of the more full glasses left on the table. When your friends who were sober enough to answer said you could go for it, you tossed it back in one shot.

You griped to one of your friends who had stayed behind to watch over those too drunk to make good choices. The two of you had been having a damn good venting session about how stupid you felt your feelings were when the entire bar swayed. Your words slurred as your body grew heavy.

One second you were sitting up, wondering why your friend looked so concerned. The next second there was a sharp pain against the temple of your forehead, followed by a heavy thunk, more pain, and darkness.

---

Vox had been desperately searching the dance floor for any sign of you. He'd torn away from Valentino and the moth hadn't bothered to follow. Vox would... handle that another time. For as much as he denied his feelings for you this morning, the second he saw the hurt look in your eyes he knew he had to tell you. There was no way he could ignore the sharp lurch in his chest at the sight of you.

He didn't know what it meant. He couldn't tell if it was just a sense of betrayal after he'd been so open with you about Valentino or if it was something more. Every time he found himself wanting to talk about his true feelings on anything, he wanted to talk to you. Every time he had a rare second alone in the middle of the night, the only touch he craved was yours. Yes, he had a history with Valentino, but he didn't actively want that. He wanted you.

He finally spotted you across the room, sitting at a table with one of the whores he'd seen at Valentino's studio and getting way too close to them for his liking. He made his way through the drunken idiots who were too far gone to notice him, keeping his eyes on you as you started swaying dangerously.

You tried to reach down for something on the table and Vox swore as you lost what little balance you had and fell over. Someone got in his way so he didn't see the impact, but somehow he heard it. Through all the noise he heard the sharp thud and the panicked swearing of the person you were with after.

Vox was suddenly shoving every idiot out of his way, ignoring their shouts as he ran into the small clearing and found you on the ground with blood seeping from your head. He was immediately on his knees, scooping you up as the sinner who'd been with you started freaking out.

The only thing Vox could hear was a high-pitched whine as he pulled you to him and tried to frantically find where you were bleeding from. Half of your head was dripping with blood and he vaguely registered your friend saying your head had hit the edge of the table.

"Just s̴̢̃ḧ̸̺u̸͇͋t̷̯͂ ̷̬̂u̶͖̓p̵̳͗!̶̳͌," Vox snapped as he whipped up and affixed the sinner with a violent glare. He didn't care that half the club was looking at him. For once, he didn't care that he'd made a scene. Logically, he knew something like this couldn't kill you, you were all already dead. But his hands were shaking violently and the buzzing in his head was getting louder because you weren't moving.

Everything around him flashed with bright blue light as he held you close and teleported out of the club without even thinking about it. The two of you reappeared in his room back at the tower and he let out a shaky breath as he placed you down on his bed.

Not knowing what to do, Vox quickly crossed the room and threw his bathroom door open as he searched for anything he could use to stop the bleeding. He was muttering furiously as he nearly ripped the hinges off the cupboard under the sink looking for anything he could use.

Vox let out a loud, angry shout as his body kept glitching. His movements were jerky and he'd hit his head on the sink twice now. Just as he was about to have an absolute meltdown, he heard you groan from his bedroom. His head snapped up and he turned around at the sound of your voice so fast he was surprised he didn't snap his own neck.

Vox yanked a towel off of the wall and scrambled across the nylon tiles as he fell into his room with all the grace of a CEO that he clearly had. He swore, picking himself up and coming over to you as you sat up and clutched your head.

"Shit, that stuff was stronger than I thought," you groaned. "Note to self, don't just chug random alcohol at the club." you tried to laugh, only to hiss as the pain in your head doubled down due to the movement.

"You're a fucking idiot," Vox sighed as he sat down next to you and lifted the towel to your head.

You flinched at the contact, and Vox grabbed your wrist with his free hand. "Stay still," he frowned, pressing again on the wound. "You're still bleeding."

Trying not to do more damage, you stay as still as possible while he tries to stop the bleeding. The silence is heavy between the two of you before you mumble quietly.

"Sorry..."

Vox blinks, frowning down at you. "For what?"

You avoid eye contact the best you can given your current condition and fist your hands on your thighs nervously. "For acting like an idiot. You've told me about how hard it is with Valentino. I should've said or done something and not have gotten..."

"Upset?" Vox finished for you quietly. You flinched, unable to read the tone in his voice. He sighed and slowly lifted the towel from your head, before lowering it. "Why did you?"

"It's stupid," you bite your lip, hand drifting up curiously to see how bad the wound is. Before your fingers could brush against your hair, Vox's hand grabbed your wrists again.

"Try me."

You couldn't say if it was due to the pain, blood loss, or alcohol in your system, but the moment you finally gathered the courage to look him in the eye, you said fuck it. Vox gasped as you surged forward and pressed your lips against his. He'd barely had a chance to process the feeling before you were already turned away from him and rambling some bullshit about how you knew he didn't feel the same.

He took your hand, ignoring the anxious nonsense flowing from your mouth, and lifted it to his lips. Your speech died on your tongue as his lips pressed against the palm of your hand.

"Do you have any idea how much you've been on my mind?" He growled softly, his lips trailing up your arm slowly as he practically worshiped your skin.

If it wasn't for the fact that your blood was still on his hands, Vox would have been so much more rough with you. He would have grabbed you and crashed his lips against yours. He would have torn the fabric that hugged your curves so tightly off of your body and shown you just how badly he'd been needing you.

Instead, he made do with tracing his claw under your chin and guiding you to face him properly. His eyes searched yours for any doubt or sign that you'd acted purely on adrenaline and not something more. When your breath hitched and your cheeks flushed, he knew. As he leaned down and pressed his lips against yours, as his arms snaked down and pulled you flush against him like you'd break, as your fingers found a home in his vest he knew.

You wanted him too. You fell for him too. This wasn't a game of "do they, don't they" like the one he'd played with Valentino for so fucking long.

His breath hitched, his arms tightening around you before he slowly pulled back and laughed breathlessly.

"Does this mean we're dating?" you ask, smiling at him like he'd hung the stars in the sky.

"God that sounds cheesy," Vox grimaced. The phrase felt so... high school bullshit. But it wasn't wrong. He wanted that. He really wanted that with you.

He reached down, hesitating before his clawed hand gently covered yours. "But yeah... I guess it does," he smiled softer than you'd ever seen before.

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Garden of Adam

Adam remembers when he first woke up in Hell after getting stabbed. He was lost for a very long time and absolutely upset about the situation. No matter how hard he prayed and tried to contact heaven, he couldn't get through.

He was on his own.

It wasn't until he got a glimpse of himself in some window, did he realize how different he looked.

His halo was gone, long black and gold horns in its place. His once light brown hair was now a dark brown, so dark it was almost black. His golden wings were now the colors of black and red, same as his outfit. His skin was more gray, the only thing that was the same were his golden eyes.

Adam had to steal some new clothes, his were torn and covered in blood and dirt.

He also couldn't risk any of these freaks recognizing him, he had heard horror stories of angels that fell into Hell and were left at the demons mercy.

They showed no fucking mercy.

Now he wore loose fitting pants, a shirt and hoodie. Anything to keep him on the down low.

When Adam was walking down the street, he came across a huge dilapidated building that was sandwiched between two thriving stores. A demon was locking the place, looking sad. "So long old friend, we had a good run." He threw the key in Adam's direction and the fallen angel caught it.

What luck.

Adam waited until the guy was gone until he went inside. No wonder he was leaving it behind. It was fucking filthy!

There was only one chair in the room and it looked to be hundreds of years old. There was dirt, dust, and cobwebs everywhere.

He slumped, knowing that the only person who was going to clean it would be him. Adam got to work cleaning the place up.

Once all the filth was gone it didn't look too bad, just needed a coat of paint.

Being in Hell, he knew he'd need to have money to make it. He could use the space to sell something but at first he didn't know what.

It took him until the end of the week to realize he had powers to manipulate and grow plants, it took another two before he figured that was what he could sell.

Who doesn't like flowers?

That's how his garden center, named Eden was born. A garden that would not be destroyed and be all Adams.

That had been two years ago.

Business was booming, apparently flowers brought many demons, especially sinners a lot of joy. It reminded them of earth and when they were alive.

Adam started collecting souls for employees six months into having the place. It started off with just one or two to give him a helping hand.

He really didn't know what to do with souls, but he didn't let that stop him.

Now he owned over fifty souls, with some more locations that he branched out to get more business he was considered an overlord.

Whatever the fuck that meant.

So of course things wouldn't stay the same and Adam couldn't just love his somewhat happy life in Hell with his flowers and other plants. Today was the day everything changed.

Adam was doing up the weekly center piece to draw people in, it was a large bouquet of flowers that were on sale that week.

The door chimed, Adam stepped away and wiped the dirt off his hands onto his apron. "Welcome to Eden, how can I-"

"Adam?"

Adam felt the blood in his veins grow cold. Oh no. He turned to look at the group that entered his store and the one who addressed him was front and center. "Lucifer?"

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

ppl please. You are making Vaggie stupider than she is in canon

"Why didn't Vaggie know angel weapons could kill angels, when Lute used one to permanently gouge out her eye-"

Because Lute also ripped off her wings, seemingly permanently, WITHOUT using a weapon.

It makes sense that Vaggie would figure only other ANGELS can HURT angels. And that's still not the same as KILLING ONE.

You can say "well if she was scarred then by it then she should've assumed a real attack could have killed her" but why? In hell, Sinners can be TORN APART and pull themselves back together. Why wouldn't Vaggie assume that she can take damage up to a point but still not die? Or that she would just reform again afterwards?

"It was a writing mistake to have Vaggie not confess her past to Charlie before they went to heaven, no believable character would do that-"

It was a character flaw, one many other characters in the show have, and it is very true to life that longer you keep a secret about yourself- especially one you're afraid people will hate you for- the harder it is to admit to it.

We know she feels like her only point in existing is to help Charlie. She said it. And later it ties in perfectly with her backstory of losing everything about herself and being found by Charlie, of rejecting her life killing Sinners and devoting herself to supporting the dream of saving them instead.

We also know the last time she "failed" people in her life she was hurt and abandoned by them. We know her FIRST plan was to NOT go to heaven with Charlie, to try and make some kind of excuse.

But then she couldn't come up with a good excuse. And she couldn't bring herself to say no to her supportive and loving girlfriend. And then they were in heaven, facing a COURT HEARING to decide the fate of SOULS, that her girlfriend would have to argue a case for-

Does that really sound like the best time to drop an emotional relationship truth bomb?

Sound. Not "was". Would it have FELT LIKE a good time to come clean to Charlie about being a former Exorcist.

HOW would it have FELT like a good time for that to Vaggie? Especially after Adam and Lute got through telling her how being scarred and crippled by them was her fault, being left down in hell by them was her fault, and her girlfriend will ALSO hate her if the truth comes out?

THIS IS A SHOW. ABOUT PEOPLE. WHO MAKE CRAPPY SELF-SABOTAGING CHOICES (look at Angel Dust) AND THEN HAVE TO DECIDE WHAT TO DO WITH THE FALL OUT OF THaT

THATS THE SHOW

THATS. THE POINT OF THE HAZBIN HOTEL

it's not "bad writing" when a WOMAN does it TOO without an essay explaining her every thought leading up to it!

like im sorry her scenes were rushed, im sorry they had worse animation and story boarding and pacing than the guys' moments get, im sorry she didn't get more focus, im sorry she isn't a fav character of the show creators-

but she IS well written. tbh all of the characters in the show are.

they do things that makes sense based on what they've been through, and what they feel, and what they want, and that's. that's good character writing.

i don't LIKE a lot of the characters but they're still WELL WRITTEN

I HAVE QUESTIONS ABOUT VAGGIE- BUT ONLY BECAUSE IM OBESSEED WITH HER AND WANT TO CRAWL INSIDE HER SKULL! SHE IS, IN THE SHOW, A PERFECTLY BELIEVABLE CHARACTER

bad writing would have been- her getting angry at Charlie for being upset about the secret! it would've been her CAVING to Adam's blackmail and arguing against Angel Dust to save herself! It would've been her moping on the top of the hotel while Charlie was angry with her instead of actively doing what she could to help, like she did!

i've lived through SO MANY badly written characters DO NOT try telling me VAGGIE is one of them- i remember the horrors. THIS is not THAT

......anyway

im probably gonna regret posting this aren't i

[mo0nfairy]

😍😍 OMG, I'm gonna be needing a part four to that Leon post stat.

(Love your writing it's amazing just like you are) ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎

part 1. part 2. part 3.

tw :: re4 spoilers, obsessive!leon, yandere!leon, violence, knives, tasers, guns, explosives, framing, murder, abuse of power, death of a character, physical restrainment, noncon touching, thoughts of suicide, being knocked unconscious, shit goes down basically.

⸺ thank u, honeybaby !!!!! i've been vv busy these past few days, but this man has been HEAVY on my mind. i've also been listening to playing dangerous by our lord and savior lana del rey on repeat and it had my brain conjuring up some ideas... (also this part is long so buckle up friends)

you see, you've been praying everyday to earn back those damned memories that slipped from your mind 6 years ago. but in a attempt to do so, all you can feel is a gun against your head, an explosion against your body, and dust permeating your lungs. all before the classic cut to black welcomes you. no crying mouse-ley, no crying guard-dog. just empty darkness. through the abyss, however, you are now able to unveil memories that were buried deep within you. and whether the return of these past events is a good thing or not is up to you.

you remember a late august evening. the cool air and descending leaves would calm you, but your current circumstances prevent you from any serenity. an anonymous tip to the RPD claimed that you were in possession of illegal substances. and somehow, those said drugs had magically appeared into existence within your home. this leaves you here, being driven to the station by the officer of the month, marvin branagh. despite everything, you're grateful marvin was the one to arrest you. you happen to favor him and his basic understanding of boundaries, as opposed to a certain mutt you know far too well.

it's safe to say you've now got quite the reputation in the RPD with how much trouble you get into. and especially with how quickly the problems seem to fade away. you're being escorted through the station until another officer complains to marvin about some kids with fake ID's. he leaves you by yourself at an empty desk with one hand cuffed to the armrest. the desk right beside leon's. you look to the blonde beside you. his head is rested against his arms folded upon his desk, deep in slumber. his cheek is squished against the surface of his arm, pushing his lips out into a duck-like pout. your mugshot peeks out from beneath his sleeping form. you swear through his unintelligible murmuring, you hear a gentle whimper of your name. marvin had mentioned during the drive how he was up all night looking through your case (wouldn't be the first time), but you can't find it in yourself to feel bad for him. you don't trust him. even several years ago, something within you has always prevented you from trusting him.

you fiddle with a mr. raccoon toy as 20 minutes slowly tread by. completely overcome with boredom, you peak over leon's shoulder to see your case file beneath him. maybe you could find something useful inside, like the bastard responsible for all these false claims. using your free hand, you manage to slyly slip your case folder from under his weight. not without a quiet whine of "no, y/n/n... don't leave me..." good god, was he cuddling your mugshot? (it would be the closest he could get to you physically, after all). you ignore him entirely, thanking the heavens that this man is such a deep sleeper.

opening the file, you find standard information about your case. you read through the notes leon left behind, which causes nausea to then stir in your stomach. he jotted down his worries of your case closing and not being able to keep you in the station any longer; there was ideas of any potential loopholes in the system he could take advantage of and prove your innocence. beside his rambling, there was a long list of certain ways he can frame you for crimes to reel you back into his clutches. what in the actual fuck? and just when you thought this situation couldn't get worse, you find he used pictures of your friends at the shooting range, bullet holes piercing through their paper faces.

you read through the evidence in shock, until a sickeningly-sweet tone gasps your name and pulls you out of your trance. you look over the folder to see those familiar blue eyes peering into yours. leon lights up like a golden retriever with a bone when he wakes up and you're the first thing he sees, metaphorical tail wagging and all. to dream of you and to be the first thing he sees when he opens his eyes, it is pure heaven! only, instead of the early morning, love-drunk haze within his dreams, he is instead met with the heartbreaking look of horror on your face. his eyes trail down to see you holding his notes and his heart sinks to the pit of his stomach. no, no, no, it wasn't supposed to be like this! it was never supposed to be like this! you were supposed to fall in love with him! you are supposed to be with him forever!

you are supposed to love him! you have to!

and you thought you've seen the worst, you thought you reached the bottom of the iceberg. but you were so, so wrong. it had been 2 weeks since you learned the truth about leon. since then, you were able to find solace within an old friend, claire redfield. not only do you adore her, but the layer of protection she had given you when you complained about the clingy cop on your hip was just the cherry on top. without leon, these 14 days were the most peace you have felt in what feels like months. you didn't know how the man who acted like he needed your presence more than air felt about this sudden separation. and to be completely honest, you didn't really care.

now, with your arm hooked around claire's, you two walk home after a night out in raccoon city. you're repeating old inside jokes and clutching your chest in heaps of rib-straining laughter. everything is full of high-spirits until you notice a certain cop car sitting in the street. claire enters your estate first, guarding you protectively while you follow her footsteps. you find (you guessed it!) no other than leon kennedy rummaging through your belongings. and the look on leon's face when he sees you with someone else is nothing short of pure anguish, sheer betrayal. he is jealous — so much so that it practically suffocates the room. you've seen plenty of emotions expressed by leon and the consequences that followed, but you've never seen first-hand what jealousy may compel him to do. considering the pictures of your friends he used as target practice, you feel as though the outcome won't be any good.

claire breaks the silence, "you disgusting pig! i'm calling my brother down here and he's gonna kick your-" her roar of anger is cut off with a sharp groan.

leon stands, taser gun in hand, as the electrodes strike into claire's body. she then falls to the ground with a loud thump, her form convulsing from the electric shocks waving through her. rushing to her side, you attempt to help her. but, you then cave into yourself when leon walks over in three large strides. and you now realize he is absolutely terrifying when he is jealous. his voice drops to a low husk as he demands you tell him who the fuck this is, a major contrast to the bubbly-puppy you're grown familiar with. you are left flabbergasted and are unable to mutter even a syllable.

you aren't even granted a mere second to compose of yourself before leon pulls a knife, plunging it deep into claire's chest. a scream of pure terror erupts from your throat. you're painted red as he relentlessly stabs your best friend, curling yourself into a corner and hiding your face in your arms. through your tear-stained vision, you see the lifeless body of claire and leon standing above her, huffing with fury like some blood-thirsty creature. something in his gaze perceptibly softens when he sees you, so scared and feeble. and it shatters his heart. after all, leon would take every life on planet earth just to see your lips curl into a smile, even once more. but, nothing could have prepared you for the words that would then leave his mouth.

he turns his body cam on. "y/n l/n, you are under arrest for the murder of... whoever this was. you have the right to remain silent. anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law." you stare at leon entirely flabbergasted, but you're too exhausted to fight against him.

he bends down to you, light whispers of "you're ok, it wasn't your fault" and "i've got you, sweet angel" doing little to comfort you. with his gentle hands against you, leon proceeds to cuff you with the same softness you would use to handle a baby bird. and you let him take you away, because you are too caught up in looking at your best friend who was laughing with you just minutes ago now dead on the ground. you cry to yourself in the backseat of the cop car the whole way to the station.

by the time you get there, you are entirely in a state of shock. tears of dread stream down your cheeks, but your face is nothing short of emotionless. you are so caught up in your head, you don't even notice the whispers of other officers there. they gossip about how considering your track record, it's no wonder you'd end up here for good. a sharp glare from the man guiding you through the department is enough for them to shut their mouths. you're then brought into an interrogation room, with cameras off and no other presence besides you and this mad-man at your beck and call.

cuffed to a chair once again, leon locks the door behind him. he then drops to his knees and ties his arms around your waist, burying his head into you. it takes several seconds for reality to hit you, but you soon realize he is crying. and if you weren't restrained currently, you would've pushed him off and made him suffer a fate far worse than what claire endured. now, the two of you are sobbing together, but for entirely different reasons. you, full of grief over someone you love being murdered just moments ago. leon, full of agony over how the gleam of emotion he was so infatuated with left your eyes. all because of him.

you muster enough strength to plead to the blonde, your voice coming out through hoarse, slurred sniffles. but much to your dismay, your cries fall on deaf ears. if only leon had more morality than he did love for you.

"i'm so sorry, y/n, i just needed to hold you. even for just one last time” he picks his head up to look at you, face breaking out in a pitiful smile. “and i can't lose you. not again.” he grabs hold of your hands from behind your back and begins caressing the digits of your fingers. and the contrast between his smile and the crazed look in his eyes has you shuddering in apprehension.

"you're stuck with me to the end."

your eyes then flutter open to see a blinding white light; you begin to hear the quiet chant of a monitor beside you. where the hell am i? despite your current confusion, all you can think about is how you grieved for your best friend in the grimy cells of the RPD, how everyone turned into undead creatures just a week later, and how leon protected you from anything as small as a paper cut. you remember how several zombies overpowered him and how you took advantage of the opportunity, running like hell away and out of raccoon city. you remember the burning of your lungs, the rain on your skin, the hope of getting far, far away from this nightmare. you also remember the fear you felt when umbrella snatched you into their possession, to where you would soon forget everything that happened. including leon kennedy.

you're in the present now, as you can tell by the sheepskin jacket around your form and the hospital bed you're laid upon. it takes you too long to realize that you're safe, out of the hellhole that is los iluminados. looking down, you find a gun sitting by your hip (leon made the declaration that if you were to never wake up again, he wouldn't hesitate to end it all right then and there). you shift your train of sight to see leon at your bedside with his head in his hands while his entire body trembles with trepidation. the sight of this lovesick maniac at your side causes you to spring forward with a harsh gasp. his heartbeat skyrockets at the sudden occurrence. you're alive, and leon can't stop the tears of relief that fall from his eyes.

"hi, pretty... i'm here, you're safe now..." the smile on his face is borderline terrifying. his hands cup your face, practically clinging onto you like a lifeline.

"i remember... i remember everything..." the statement is entirely said to yourself, your gaze distant and not entirely there.

his eyebrows scrunch upwards, gaze softening (if it can even soften more than it already has). leon then pulls your face to his and molds his lips against yours aggressively, desperately. it isn't soft, sweet, or romantic in any sense. it is inexperienced, but overflowing with raw passion, need, and obsession. he only stops when the two are you are breathless and gasping for air. a dreamy sigh escapes leon's lips once he parts from you, gazing into your eyes as if you were something holy (which you are, obvi, but i digress). leon is so horrifically, irrevocably, disgustingly in love with you. and you can feel everything in his all-too overwhelming kiss.

he then engulfs you and melts into your arms like a noodle in boiling water. his light-headed, lovesick laughter fans against your neck. leon somehow pulls you impossibly closer to him, almost as if he were trying to morph the two of you together. it is too much; he is all you can feel, smell, touch. but, without a sliver of strength in your body, you are entirely vulnerable to him and his captivation.

"ashley... she didn't make it..." there’s a certain tone in leon's voice you can’t explain, but you shudder beneath it, anyway. he tells the information softly, but his voice is full of too much exhilaration to be normal. with these newfound memories, that dread returns to your stomach at the thought of what leon is capable of. what leon may have done to ashley while you were out cold.

through the abyssal darkness, your wish has been granted. you have now retrieved all lost memories.

and now, you know why you never were able to trust leon kennedy.

the end !! hehe, thanks for the fun ride babes.

HOWEVER……….. this is surely not the end of my resident evil stained brainrot. so i will not be continuing this series, but i will most certainly be pouring out everything in my RE-obsessed brain. only if u would like to see it, of course. if u do, pls send me some asks!! and thank u again !!!

[alice-angel12x]

Born of Unkown Stardust

Ch. 4

summary: The angles formed the world and all mortal life from dust. One day from the unknown the angels came across bizarre dust, that seemed to have a will of its own. It refused to be molded and shaped to the angel's will. So they cast it aside, till a certain angel got his creative hands on it.

(bittersweet story) (platonic) Lucifer x (???) Reader x Sera

<-Part 3/ Part 5 ->

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yuu Cried out as pure energy flowed from them like a roaring river. The vortex thrashed and trashed everything in the room, as Yuu let everything flow. Sera watched in worry as the energy started to get stronger with no signs of stopping. The roof above the child threatened to give way, so without a thought Sera rushed to Yuu.

She quickly wrapped her arms around the crying child. But the energy rushing out of Yuu burned her skin as she held the child close. The energy was hot?... Cold? All she could tell was that hurt like Hell.

(Song You'll be in my heart)

"Come stop your crying It will be alright Just take my hand Hold it tight I will protect you From all around you" Sera sang, straining through the pain.

Yuu's thrashing started to slow a bit. Sera slowly and gently held the child's hand, giving it a small squeeze.

"I will be here Don't you cry

For one so small You seem so strong My arms will hold you Keep you safe and warm," Sera continued as the flow of energy started to weaken, very slowly.

"This bond between us Can't be broken I will be here don't you cry," She sang as Yuu slowly curled up close to her.

"Cause you'll be in my heart Yes, you'll be in my heart From this day on Now and forever more," As The angel sang, Yuu's cries became soft whimpers as the cortex finally vanished.

"You'll be in my heart No matter what they say You'll be here in my heart Always," Sera sang as she looked at the destruction around the room. She slowly walked out of the room to Yuu's room to tuck them in.

"Always," She finished as she gently tucked the blanket over Yuu. With that, she quietly turns to leave.

"Don't leave. Don't leave," Yuu whimpered in their sleep.

Sera paused for a moment and looked at the door. Yet her heart wouldn't allow her to go, not after what she saw. So with a sigh, Sera sat down in a comfy chair in the room and slowly drifted to sleep.

_________________________________________________

Crash!!!

Sera gasped awake at the sound of crashing plates. She looks over to Yuu's bed to see it is empty. She quickly rushed down to the kitchen to see. Yuu... Making Pancakes? How were they making pancakes? They're a child!

"Ah Sorry, Ms.Sera! I was making SorryCakes. But some pans fell over," Yuu said as they cleaned up the spilled dishes.

"Sorrycakes?" Sera asked with a confused chuckle.

"Sorry Pancakes. Cause I of that," Yuu said as they pointed to Sera's burns on her arms and torso.

"Oh, Well apology accepted Yuu," Sera said as she used her magic to clean the mess around the kitchen. "Did Lucifer teach you how to make pancakes?"

"I watched him, so I copied what he did. I got better at it when I had to cook for myself... When he left me...Alone," Yuu said as they placed the plate in front of Sera.

"Thank you," Sera smiles and takes a few bits out of the food. "How are you feeling?"

"I don't know. I think sad...Angry? I don't know, I just... I just want me Da," Yuu said weakly. "Was what Da did really that bad?"

"I'm afraid so. He has let Roo take hold of Earth and now her influence will reign over humanity forever," Sera explained.

"Why is that a bad thing? It only affects humans, and not us," Yuu pointed out.

"If only it were that simple. Humans are mortal and don't live forever like you and I. Originally when they passed on, their souls would join us in heaven. However now that sin has entered Earth, we can't accept bad souls into our realm," Sera explained.

"Bad souls?" Yuu asked.

"Humans who in life have done bad things, committing sin," Sera said slowly, trying the best she could to explain to the child.

"So if souls don't sin, and stay good. They can come to heaven?" Yuu asked slowly.

"Or at least lived a not-to-sinful life," Sera nodded.

"So If... If I help humans not be bad... And not sin. Can Da come back?" Yuu asked with slight hope.

Sera sighed sadly as she could see the gears turning in Yuu's head.

"I'm not really sure if it is possible. Lucifer's banishment was decided by the vote of the elder council," Sera tried to explain. But she could already see the gears turn in the young child's head.

-------------------------------

60 Years Later

Suddenly a grand bell rang. A Human soul has arrived in heaven.

"What's that?" Yuu asked.

"The first human soul has arrived in heaven. Come, let go welcome them," Ser smiles as she holds her hand to Yuu.

"Okay," Yuu said nervously as they held Sera's hand.

-------------------------------------

The angels of all ranks stood at the pearly gates, all excited as they welcomed this first human. I've never seen them so excited before. Sera parted the crowd as I followed closely behind her to see this human.

And there he was standing in the middle of the crowd, who looked on in awe. Yet The human seemed really freaked out as he looked around frantically.

"Abel! Abel!" The human man cried out. "Where's my Son?! Where Is Eve!?"

"Son? Where is his family?" I asked Mother Sera.

"Wait right here okay," She said gently as she flys over the Human.

I watched as Sera spoke to the human, who was tiny compared to her. As She spoke to him, at first, he was upset and yelling. When suddenly he wasn't, he was quiet and sad. Only to quickly fly off somewhere, and no one followed. I hope he is okay.

So, Silently I followed this human. He flew off to some distant cloud to sit in silence. Slowly I inched my way closer and closer when he suddenly turned. Quickly spotted me.

“What? What are you? You don’t looks like the others,” Adam questioned.

“I’m… Huh… I don’t really know. My Dad created me,” I answered honestly.

“Why are you here?” Adam asked sharply.

“W-why are you sad. Is it because your family isn’t here?” I asked softly.

“There not, and it’s all because of that Bi-… S-Snake of a women’s fault,” Adam stumbled as he looked at me.

I wonder what he was going to say, and who is the snake Women?

“E-Eve?” I asked slowly.

“No! Lilith! I knew she was up to no good. I should have listened to my gut, and sent her away when she came back,” Adam said in anger as he passed back and forth.

"What did Lilith do?" I asked.

"She tricked my wife, and know she is condemned forever. When Eve out of anyone should be up here. Lilith and her stupid Angel lover screwed her over. Just to get back at me," Adam said bitterly.

'wait angel lover? Can't be right?' Then I remembered something, from the last night I saw Da. He was working on something. Saying that "she" believed in his dreams. And hidden behind his arm was a small red fruit, crafted and embued with magic.

"Did Lilith use a red fruit of some kind?" I asked slowly.

"Yeah an Apple," Adam confirmed but paused as he stopped to look at me. "Why do you ask?"

"That was my Da. I saw him working on it. But he promised me he wouldn't cause trouble! He promised," I said weakly. That promise is nothing known.

Adam just sighed in frustration as he randomly tousled my hair. He simply sits down and stares into the distance.

"Looks like you were also screwed over by Lilith. She screwed me out of being with my wife, Screwed Eve out of getting into heaven, and you out of a Father," Adam said simply as we sat in silence.

----------------------------

"Yuu! Yuu where did you go!" Sera called out as she searched for them.

As she looked around she spotted them, Adam looked up to see her. He turned to Yuu to turn their attention to Sera. The seraphim smiled in relief as she opened her arms as Yuu floated into her embrance.

"Thank you Adam for finding them," Sera nodded.

"No problem," He said plainly as he walked off.

As Sera carried Yuu away, she noticed that Yuu was still deep in thought. Very troubled thoughts.

"What's on your mind Yuu?" Sera asked.

"Adam said that Da was Lilith's lover... What is a lover?" Yuu asked.

Sera stuttered a bit as she quickly came up with a child-friendly explanation.

"Lovers is something that happens between two adults. When they love each other very much, they want to spend the rest of their lives together. And eventually, start a family all their own," Sera explained.

Yuu remained silent for a bit as they mulled over the information. When Yuu slowly asked again.

"So... Da loved Lilith more? And that's why he chose not to keep his promise?" Yuu asked, their eyes began to water. "Did... Did Da no longer want me? To be with me?"

Sera gasped as he held the poor child and they began to cry.

"Was it cause I couldn't make the world we said we'd make fast enough? I tried, I really Tried! I worked so hard," Yuu said as the tears started to roll down Yuu's cheeks.

"Oh, Yuu. It is not your fault. Lucifer loves you very much. But the love he felt for Lilith blinded him from realizing he had someone important home. He left you alone for days on end for Lilith. That was selfish of him," Sera comforted Yuu. "If only he slowed down to see how much. How far and beyond you went for him, to make a world for him."

Yuu hugged Sera tightly, their little arms wrapping around Sera's neck.

"Now, let's get lunch," Sera smiles.

"PANCAKES!" Yuu says as they try to wipe all the tears away.

"Pancakes? Didn't you have enough pancakes for a lifetime," Sera chuckled.

--------------------------------------------

Meanwhile in Hell

Lucifer was able to create a safe castle within hell for himself and Lilith. Lilith slept soundly on the soft king-size bed that she shared with Lucifer. Sadly as the new queen slept peacefully, the king on the other hand was haunted. He thrashes and turns on his bed as falls into a dream.

------------------------------

Tags:

@@littleladydemon  , @corvid007, @ellaprime7, @just-here-reading, @kyo-kyo1

[yurislilygarden]

ʚїɞ Self Aware! Hazbin Hotel

ʚїɞ Their reaction after becoming self-aware and first thoughts about reader!

ʚїɞ Angel Dust and Husk / Part 2!

ʚїɞ Keep in mind English is not my first language, so you may find mistakes!

ʚїɞ Word count: just about 1.1k

ʚїɞ Part 1! (Lucifer and Alastor)

ʚїɞ This is WAY shorter than I would like, but I suppose that the first part was more filler-like for the au😭 May rewrite it one day ngl, am not satisfied with how this turned out but I've been at this for way too long

Very few characters would notice something wrong on the first watch of the show, but wouldn't realize, nor become self-aware until the 2nd or further watch. 

While everyone's reaction would be different with different amounts of stages before total acceptance of the situation, they all would share the first emotion, simple disbelief. They would first need to even process the fact that they're not real, that they were created solely for the purpose of entertaining… something? Someone? In a completely different Universe. That everything that they thought had happened to them before they died didn't actually happen, they were never alive in the first place. Only after that did the emotions and reactions differ. The very first emotion or actual personal reaction would be:

Angel Dust

Irritation, a little bit of Anger, paranoid

Angel would be mainly irritated and somewhat angry due to realizing that all his pain was technically for nothing. The treatment from Val? His life back on earth that supposedly never happened? His life generally in hell? All that pain and suffering just to entertain someone? At first, he doesn't want to accept that it never happened, that he never existed, that he was never actually alive. That he’s just a 2D character. He just can’t.

He would become paranoid after the immense stress from noticing the little butterfly flying above them from time to time came in, after all, he had no way of knowing if he himself or others were watched only when they could see the little glowing motherfucker, or maybe they could be watched even without seeing them, without their knowledge. He would be a little disappointed in himself for not noticing anything earlier, especially since they don’t know just how long have you been watching them. He'd be up for drugs way more than ever, no, he didn't want to disappoint Charlie or anyone else by fucking up the progress he'd been doing, but surely they would understand looking at the whole picture right? He’d rather go back to being blissfully unaware than knowing he's not real if it means he's gonna feel like this. He hates it. He hates you.

At least at the start.

It was soon after he became self-aware that the others realized why he was acting more strangely than normal and filled him in on what they knew, which was barely anything, to tell the truth, but it was enough to get him thinking. Were you as bad as he first thought if you did nothing but watch them the whole time? He will blame Charlie for all the better thoughts of you, but he started thinking, what if you really can't do anything but watch? He knows others have mixed thoughts about what can you do, an example being whether you can only watch, or do you choose to just watch. He's on the ‘can only watch‘ team.

His feelings were mixed for a pretty long time. On one side, he thought he should be against the small glowing thingy, but there's also the other side seeing that you do nothing to them, just watch.

(I would say that he would have a little soft spot if you reminded him of Molly, his sister, but we don’t know anything about her. I’m guessing she was nice/good since she landed in heaven, so yeah, remind him of his sister in some way and there’s a soft spot he tries to hide.)

He was really negative at first, starting out as really irritated, but with time and help from the others (mainly Charlie since she didn't want anyone in the hotel to be against you), he did get to the neutral zone, and by the time any of them meet you, he would be in the more positive neutral zone.

Husk

Anger and worry

To say he's pissed would be the understatement of the century. The moment he processed his, everyone’s, situation and the disbelief passed, he could just feel anger, because how dare someone disregard their feelings, their whole damn existence like that? Do you think that they’re some sort of clowns that are supposed to entertain you?! Like most characters, he’s disappointed in himself as well for not noticing earlier. It’s even worse when there’s others who noticed before him and didn’t say shit.

But as much as he's pissed off, there's actually the feeling of worrying just under. What does it mean for them now that they realize they're just characters in a show, that they find out something they shouldn't? Can it fuck up their life on this side? Can it fuck up the whole city or more because of this? Should they try to continue living like they don't know shit or try to communicate with you or your world? Similar to Lucifer's, his mind is a mess.

Like everyone, he hates the idea, the knowledge, of the fact that they all are just some 2D characters created to be in some sort of a show to entertain people. Did that mean that his whole past of being an Overlord didn’t happen at all? That his supposed memories of that time were fake? Could he have been free from the deal if he had an actual choice in his actions?

He would keep reminding himself all the time about their situation even if he doesn’t want to, his mind just goes there without permission. He feels his skin crawl thinking about all the time that they’ve been watched, controlled, without knowing, for who knows how long. He would be in the middle when it comes to when all of the characters became self-aware, there were some before him, but there were also some people after him.

Reader can only see what they're meant to, and the characters realize it over time, but Husk knowing it leads to him sometimes trying to catch the small glowing butterfly in his paws when he is off screen/camera for you. Which he fails at every time as his hands just phase through your small form.

The others can just occasionally see him jumping up and down trying to catch the little shit or use his wings and try to catch your small form like that just to fail every single time.

Like with everyone else, you could have a small personal favor. You would have a sort of a plus point in his mind if you turned out to like gambling or card games, he would find the idea of playing with/against you somewhat enjoyable (he would think of gambling for answers, a deal where the one who wins a round will ask a question and the other has to answer to the best of their capability).

It would take longer than most, even with the others trying to help, to get him to the neutral zone, never mind the positive one. It was hard for him to see you in any other light than negative when they had so little information on you, for all they could know, what little they had could’ve been completely wrong. So his feelings start at practically despising you, then after a longer time going into simply not caring as much, shrugging off, if you will, and that wouldn’t change too much until he meets reader personally.

Notes, comments, and reblogs are greatly appreciated

｡⋆｡˚ ʚ Taglist ɞ ˚｡⋆｡

@laundrybear413

[1111-sunset-circle]

😘 - Do they kiss your hands, cheeks, forehead etc? What kind of not-on-the-lips kisses do they give most?

💃 - Do you ever dance together?

👬 - What kind of hugs do they give? (Do they lift you off your feet? Bear hug you? Softly cuddle you?)

[for any/all you please!]

😘:

Adam loves kissing and holding my hands, looking at them, gently touching my knuckles n tracing veins. He kisses my head a lot too.

Barbara will give me absent kisses on the upper arm or shoulder because she hugs me a lot. She also likes the affectionate rubbing noses together thing!!

💃:

I can’t dance for shit. Adam and Barb and I will have fun together listening to music and spinning each other around and being silly.

I’ve waltzed with Niles before—he gave me mini lessons—I kept stepping on him at first but he just sort of laughed it off before offering (jokingly) to let me stand on his feet.

👬:

Hehe I like this one a lot..

Barb gives full impact hugs. Like, run at you quick, wrap her arms around you, squeeze you tight. The kinda hugs that I always go oof! to.

Adam’s hugs are firm, but gentler than his wife’s. He’ll rub his thumbs on my back or lace his fingers together if he plans to hold me for a while.

Niles, when we haven’t seen each other in a bit, will lift me at the waist and spin me around!! It makes me giggle. He doesn’t hug me much, but he puts up with it nicely when I hug him.

Jack has a hug that’s like Adam and Barbara combined. Strong and comforting and warm. He’ll say comforting things, too, if it’s applicable.

Maggie’s hugs are very soft and sweet. Quick, gentle, she sometimes rubs my back in little circles or gives me a couple pats before letting go.

[momentomori24]

I swear to God, Twitter being able to accumulate so many brain-dead, malicious, pseudo intellectual low lives all in one place at the same time is a phenomenon worthy of being studied under a microscope in a science lab. And no, that is not a compliment.

Thankfully people have already spoken out against this bullshit-- the fact that people needed to is already maddening to think about-- but as someone who got the basic gist of what happened literally yesterday I'll also put my voice out there: Don't you fucking dare try to paint Hbomb as a murderer over this situation.

Somerton may be a lying, misogynistic plagiarist and conman, but he obviously doesn't deserve to die and while I do make fun of the guy, I genuinely hope that he continues to have a life after the dust has settled on everything. Not on YouTube or any social media platform for a long time at least, but just a life nontheless. I don't wish what he's potentially going through on anyone, and I hope that he makes it through this. But regardless of if he does or doesn't-- and God forbid he doesn't-- none of this is Hbomb's fault. It's not his fault, or Kat's fault, or Jessie's fault (because apparently there's people blaming her too cuz WHY NOT), or anybody's fault. All they did was call out his actions, hold him accountable for the harm he's done. They have done nothing to deserve having to carry this on their shoulders should the worst happen. They did nothing wrong. They didn't kill James (he's not confirmed dead yet either btw). They are not murderers. And to the people saying they are: say those words out loud, listen how they sound like, and re-evaluate. Just cease.

And to people like this:

''Oh I'm not blaming him for anything I'm just blaming him for what his audience did because according to HIM you're responsible for your audience'' Yeah, you people can shut your mouths too. Of course you're responsible for your audience, and that includes Hbomb too. However, your tiny, godless little monkey brain can't see why your argument is still rubbish even with that in mind. The difference between James, Internet Historian and Hbomb is that Hbomb never promoted problematic behaviour to his audience. If you promote problematic shit like harassment or misogyny or racism, then yeah, you're absolutely responsible for how your behaviour influences your audience. But that's not what he did. He made it very clear where he stood on those things, literally stating that ''if anyone were to harass Somerton on his behalf they are worse than him and will not see the light of heaven''. He's done his part in making it clear that harassment is wrong, so if someone went out of their way to go against that and harass James anyway that doesn't reflecf on him at all. Also, what the hell do you mean ''hatemobbed'' to suicide? I don't doubt there are people who went to extremes because those bad apples always exist, but most of the things I've seen are valid critisisms, memes and call outs about that guy. If holding people accountable for their actions and poking fun at them a little counts as 'hatemobbing'' (which has Filip calling his critics a ''lynch mob'' energy tbh) what the hell do you call actual hatemobbing then? Do we just let people continue being shitty because calling them out ''damages their mental health'' or ''drives them to suicide'' then? Is that a world you want to live in?

Same thing goes for people like this:

Criticing someone for their objectively bullshit content and wanting them dead are two seperate things. What the actual hell is wrong with you. The plagiarist in question is a person. Those ''harshest critics'' are still people. And because we're people, we care. I'd rather James pump out more plagiarised slop than commit suicide. I'd still hate him for it, but I'd prefer him being alive over the alternative any day. We all do. None of us would sleep easier knowing he's dead just because he wouldn't be ''committing the cardinal sin of putting out a 'pure content mill' video'' because someone taking their own life is horrific-- especially Hbomberguy, how dare you even try to imply that?

And this gets me to the reason I'm furiously typing all this out in the first place: Hbomb is the fucking victim here, so stop treating him like he isn't. He tried making things as right as possible by compensating those that were burned by James through a video where he revealed everything there needs to be known about the guy so that less people fall victim to his actions and lies. To just ignore the harm James was causing while he had the evidence to prove it and platform too big to threaten into non existence should he speak out would've been bad. So he didn't. He did the right thing by sticking with the people James had stolen from, giving them a voice and making them known after they've been scrubbed from the picture by decidedly being uncredited for their works or bullied into silence. He shouldn't have to deal with this for doing the right thing. He shouldn't be labelled a murderer for doing the right thing. He shouldn't have to have the death of a man on his conscience for doing the right thing. People claiming otherwise are obviously wrong, but I can't imagine what all this must feel like right now. Because even tho they're wrong, guilt isn't a rational thing, and I know that if I were in his position I'd still feel like a morally bankrupt individual were the worst to happen even if I knew that it was not my fault. This isn't a funny story. So to add to this dumpsterfire by using it as a prop to bash on a creator you don't like and immediately write Somerton off as dead even when he's not even been confirmed dead yet to do that shows how little these people actually care about the thing they're talking about. They don't care a guy potentially killed himself-- what they care about is using it to paint Hbomb in a bad light because they don't like him. Here they are, posting memes and ill jokes about this very delicate situation while barely a day since the news broke out had passed. It's opportunistic, it's sickening, and literally the exact thing he criticised in his video when talking about 'content mills'. Like, I know none of these clowns bothered to actually watch it, but have some self-awareness. And some shame too, while you're at it.

This long story short: I'm writing this to contribute to the narrative not getting twisted to make Hbomb out to be the villian. Same goes for everyone else. Don't let these people paint them as the villians. If I see another person pull this shit again I will literally bite you and shred you into salad and spit you back out because I hate you so much and I mean that wholeheartedly.

To Hbomb: you will never see this but if you do, take care of yourself.

To the asshats this post is about: Delete your account. Cease all together. Stop talking about this. Just leave him the fuck alone.

[switchypanic]

One Last Trust Exercise || A 'Hazbin Hotel' Tickle Fic

Summary: The night before The Extermination, the hotel crew decides to play a game of truth or dare. After all, what do they have to lose? They'll probably all be dead the next day anyways. However, a few interesting secrets come to light, and the evening takes a surprising turn.

Content Warnings: Canon-typical language and MINOR spoilers for the beginning of episode eight.

Word Count: 2,475 words.

Nobody was excited for what tomorrow would bring. The threat of imminent, painful failure loomed over their heads, unable to be masked by alcoholic beverages or (attempts at) rousing speeches. For them to survive, it was going to take a miracle, and Heaven had not been too keen on giving those out up to that point. However, there was a small bright side to the situation, as hard as it is to believe.

With little left to lose, the hotel staff were oddly relaxed with each other, showing the most affection and open comradery towards one another that Charlie had ever seen from the group. Husk and Angel were sharing drinks and snickering softly to each other at the bar, the former overlord absentmindedly cleaning a few shot glasses as the spider demon watched, barely muffling snickers behind one of his many hands. Whatever the two were joking about was lost on the princess, not that she minded in the slightest.

Nifty was rambling to Cherri Bomb about her newest creation, a morbid adaptation of 'Romeo and Juliet' which utilized the many roaches she had exterminated as puppets, garnering looks of concern and feigned smiles of encouragement from her captive audience. From a few meters away, Alastor listened in silently, his ever present smile somehow even wider than usual, betraying his clear amusement at the situation before him.

And then there was Vaggie, mumbling quiet words of encouragement to Sir Pentious in the far corner of the room, away from any prying ears. The snake demon fiddled with his hat, eyes flickering over to Cherri Bomb, causing his hood to flare open for a moment before he forced it back down with his hands. Charlie couldn't help but giggle; Vaggie wasn't the best at flirting herself, yet she was still trying her best to be a good wingman. If Charlie had thought she couldn't possibly be any more in love with the woman, she was being proven wrong yet again.

Charlie felt a pang of anxious sadness in her heart, knowing that all of the progress they had made could be undone in a single instant tomorrow morning. A single pierce from an exorcist's blade could mean the end, the final end, for any one of them. It could mean the sudden and cruel end of everything they had been working so hard to achieve.

The princess wrung her hands, blinking back tears as she attempted to calm herself down. Getting all worked up in front of everyone wouldn't help matters. No, she needed to do something to get her mind off of tomorrow. Scouring her mind for any ideas, one suddenly came to her, and her usual smile returned in a flash.

Clearing her throat, Charlie climbed atop of the nearby coffee table, careful not to accidentally knock over one of the many whisky glasses left strewn about. "Um, excuse me everyone! Can I have your attempt for a moment?" She yelled.

The various conversations paused, heads turning expectantly towards her.

"I had an idea for one final trust exercise for us to do before tomorrow; truth or dare! Anyone who wants to play is welcome to, but it's totally not mandatory!" Charlie announced. "Like I said, spend tonight however you guys want! I just thought it might be fun for us to-"

"Sounds fun to me!" Angel Dust interrupted, a playful smirk plastered to his face as he got to his feet. "Haven't played that since before I bit the bullet back on Earth. What do you say, Husk? You in too?" The actor asked, glancing over his shoulder at the cat demon.

Husk hummed, seemingly thinking it over. "Aah, what the hell? Why not? Not like I've got much else to do tonight." The bartender replied, shrugging.

Charlie turned her attempt to Nifty, who was bouncing on her toes with excitement. "Oh, I love that game! I love that game!" The short sinner squealed.

Cherri Bomb couldn't help but snort with laughter. "Fuck yeah, I'm in too! Last time I played that, I got to spend ten minutes in a closet with some super hot hellhound!"

From across the room, Charlie noticed Pentious' face go bright red. "I'm afraid I'm not familiar with such a game...but I would be willing to learn!" The snake demon pipped in. "This...Truth Or Dare, as you called it, does sound quite intriguing. How about you, Vagatha? Shall you be joining in as well?"

Vaggie rolled her eyes. "NOT my name, dude. We've been over this. But...yeah, why not?" The former Exorcist shot her girlfriend a gentle smile, and Charlie felt like her heart was going to beat right out of her chest.

Now, it seemed the only one left to answer was...

Charlie turned her attention to Alastor. The overlord hadn't moved from his previous position, though his expression had changed ever so slightly, bearing an emotion that Charlie couldn't quite discern. "Al? What about you?" The princess asked, offering an encouraging smile. "You want to play? No pressure, of course!" She half expected him to say no. Alastor was a private man, and while he often enjoyed messing with others, he didn't seem the type to play a game which could leave him vulnerable in some capacity.

However, to her surprise, the radio host let out a small laugh and quickly strode over to her. "Why not? I'm afraid I'm also unfamiliar with such a game, though I have been told I'm a fast learner!" Alastor replied.

Charlie squealed with excitement, jumping off of the table and ushering everyone forwards. "Great! Alright, everybody get into a circle on the floor!" She instructed, plopping down on the carpet with a soft thud. Vaggie took the seat to her right, as expected, and Nifty to her left. Alastor positioned himself between Nifty and Sir Pentious, the later of which had strategically made sure to claim a seat next to Cherri. Finally, Angel and Husk finished out the circle (were Charlie's eyes deceiving her, or was Husk ever so slightly wrapping a wing around the actor).

The princess clapped her hands with excitement. "Okay, since some of you haven't played before, I'll explain the rules! When the game starts, I'll ask one of you to pick truth or dare. If you pick truth, you have to answer whatever question I ask honestly. If you pick dare, you have to do whatever I dare you to. Once you've done either of those things, it's your turn to ask somebody else!"

Sir Pentious raised a hand. "ANYTHING you ask or dare? What if you wanted me to sign over my soul?" He asked, shooting a distrusting look at Alastor.

Charlie hummed, rubbing her chin thoughtfully. "Good point! I guess it would be a good idea to put some rules in place, just for safe keeping. If there is a truth or dare you really aren't comfortable with doing, use the safeword...apple!"

"And how do we know if somebody is telling the truth?" The snake demon continued, head cocked to the side with curiousity.

"That's the thing, we're working on the honor system! It's up to you guys to stay truthful with us. Remember all of our previous exercises; you can trust everyone here!"

Husk snorted. "Suuure..." He grumbled, also shooting Alastor a nasty look. If the deer demon was bothered by the group's apparent distrust in him, he didn't show it.

"Alright, I'll go first! Hm....Vaggie, truth or dare?" Charlie asked, beaming from ear to ear as she turned towards her girlfriend. The former Exorcist chuckled, shaking her head.

"Truth."

"Okay then, what's your favorite food?" Angel could be heard snickering from across the circle; of course Charlie would pick such a vanilla question.

"Empanadas."

"See?" Charlie squealed with delight. "It's super easy! You'll all get the hang of it in no time! Okay, Vaggie, it's your turn to ask someone!"

"Oookay..." Vaggie slowly glanced around the circle, taking a moment to think before selecting her target. "Cherri, truth or dare?"

The bomb expert grinned impishly. "You kiddin' me? Dare, mate!"

"Then I dare you to...do a cartwheel."

Cherri Bomb scoffed, getting to her feet. "For real? I can do that in my sleep!" She retorted, easily demonstrating her point as she completed the dare with ease. Nifty clapped excitedly, letting out a maniacal giggle.

"Bravo, bravo!"

Cherri looked over to the shorter demoness, chuckling as she sat back down. "Alright, pipsqueak, your turn! Truth or dare?"

The janitor was practically vibrating with excitement. "Oooh, dare! Dare!"

"Then I dare you to give ol' Angie here a taste of the tickle monster treatment, yeah?" Cherri replied, sending a knowing smirk to her friend.

Angel, who had been preoccupied whispering something to Husk, sputtered in shock. "What the fuck? Cherri!" The actor cried out, a look of betrayal on his face. "Did you have to throw me under the bus?!"

The other shrugged. "Sorry, mate! I'm kinda limited on the kinds of dares I'm allowed to give at this bloody place."

Angel's head snapped in Nifty's direction, his heart racing as the tiny cyclops scuttled over to him, giggling with excited glee. "N-Now Nif, we can talk about this, yeah?" A grin was already starting to tug at Angel's lips, and while he leaned back slightly, he made no real effort to get away.

"Sorry, a dare's a dare!" Nifty launched herself forward, nearly knocking the actor onto his back with the force of her movement. The smaller sinner's fingers immediately found their way to Angel's sides, digging in with chaotic zeal. Angel let out a surprised yelp, biting down on his lip in a vain attempt to contain his chuckles.

"Nohoho! Nifty, cohohome on! Lemme gohohohoho!"

"Ah, he doesn't mean that! Just look at him; he's barely fighting back!" Cherri replied, grinning deviously. "Wait, not barely fighting back, more like not fighting back AT ALL."

From across the rug, Charlie was cooing at the endearing sight, and even Vaggie was starting to smile a little.

"Aaw, this is so cute!" The princess gushed.

"You think this is cute? Lil' gremlin ain't even gettin' one of his really good spots. You latch onto one of those, he's DONE FOR." Cherri was determined to fluster the shit out of him, wasn't she?"

Angel's face turned a brilliant shade of pink, his face burrowing into his hands in an attempt to hide itself. "Cheheherri, shuhuhuhuhut uhuhuhup!" He whined. Next to him, Husk couldn't contain the teasing grin tugging at his own lips.

"Well, well. Never would have pegged you as the ticklish type, considering your line of work."

Angel collapsed backwards onto the carpet as Nifty was gently pried off of him by Cherri, supporting his upper body on his elbows. It seemed the brief attack had been enough to satisfy his companion's mischievous streak, though Nifty herself was protesting over her fun being cut short. "Oho, cohohome off it. Everybody's a bit ticklish, ain't they?" He retorted.

"Not me." Husk replied smugly. A burst of laughter rang out from across the circle; it seemed Alastor was finally ready to speak up.

"Now Husker, it's not very nice to lie to one's friends, is it?" The Radio Demon chided, shaking his head in disapproval. The cat demon shot him a glare, wings puffing up slightly.

"I ain't lying!"

Alastor hummed, grin sharpening as a devious glint entered his eyes. "Funny, I seem to remember you rolling on the round, wheezing with laughter during your last shedding season. If I recall correctly, Nifty had decided to take a grooming brush to your wings. Ringing any bells?"

While not especially evident because of his fur, Husk knew that he was blushing up a storm. "You shut it!" He growled, tail flicking back and forth in flustered irritation.

"There's nothing to be embarrased about, Husk! I'm ticklish, and as we all just saw, so is Angel! It's completely normal!" Charlie chimed in, attempting to offer reassurance. "It wouldn't surprise me if everyone here was to some degree!"

"Hey, stop draggin' me into this!" Angel groaned. "Though I suppose she does have a point; I ain't never met somebody who ain't ticklish SOMEWHERE!"

"I'm not!" Nifty said, beaming with pride.

"Yeah, suuure." Cherri chuckled in response, shaking her head.

"I'm afraid little Nifty is quite right; both Husker and I have attempted to tickle her on multiple occasions, to no success." Alastor said, sharing a sharp-toothed smile with the little cyclops. "She seems to be indestructible when it comes to tickling."

Happy to have the conversation directed away from his own sensitivity, Husk nodded. "As much as I hate to say it, Smiles is right on that front. The girl's a walking fortress; no cracks in the foundation."

Noticing that Sir Pentious had been oddly quiet, Vaggie gave him a gentle nudge. "How about you?" She asked, wanting to ensure the snake demon felt included.

Pentious flinched, hood flaring out slightly. "Who, me?" He chuckled nervously. "Why, the great Sir Pentious isn't ticklish! It would be rather unbecoming of a villain such as I, would it not?"

"Not necessarily. Anyone can be ticklish, even villains." Charlie said gently.

Angel Dust snorted with laughter. "You say that, but somehow I have a hard time picture Al rolling on his ass and laughin' up a storm!" The actor butted in, pointing an accusatory finger at the overlord. "What IS the deal with YOU, huh? You got anything your wanna admit to the group?"

The faint sound of buzzing radio static could be heard lingering in the air. "Me? Why, I don't see how that's any of your business, is it?" Alastor replied, head cocking to the side as if to challenge the other demon.

"That ain't a no." Angel retorted with a small smirk.

Nifty jumped to her feet, waving her arms about excitedly. "Oh, oh! He is! He is! This one time, I-" The little demoness was cut off as Alastor scooped her up, pressing a palm against her mouth.

"Now, now, my dear! Some things are best left a secret, hm?"

"No fuckin' way, I wanna hear it!" Angel leaned forward, eyes narrowing playfully. "Go on, Nif! Tell us aaall about it!" As Nifty squirmed in Alastor's hold, frantic talking could be heard muffled behind his hand. A moment later, Alastor suddenly released his grip, lip curling as he recoiled in disgust.

"Did you just LICK my hand?!"

Charlie knew she should probably put a stop to things before they got too crazy; that she should redirect the group back to the game. However, seeing the pure, silly interactions they were having, she just couldn't bring herself to do it. After all, why not let them have their silly little squabble?

After tomorrow, it could be a good, long while before any of them could relax again.

[jensettermandu]

-𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙜𝙞𝙧𝙡𝙨 𝙜𝙤 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙚𝙣, 𝙗𝙖𝙙 𝙜𝙞𝙧𝙡𝙨 𝙜𝙤 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚-

-𝙥𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙧𝙨-

1.5

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𝘨!𝘱 𝘫𝘦𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘦 𝘹 𝘧𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳

content warning; MDNI, morally grey characters, toxic relation/situationships, domestic abuse, violence, substance use/abuse, mentions of weight/toxic beauty standards, dubcon, a lot of smut (spitting, spanking, bondage, choking, rough sex, etc. appears), age gap (legal), mentions of sensitive topics, not made for glorification of toxic relationships.

wc; 18k+ (sorry, it's just this chapter, a lot of smut ig :/)

[Present]

Jennie groaned at the hands that were tugging on her hair as she kissed along the girl's inner thighs, taking in the scent of lotion that was lingering all over the vixen's skin. Her patience was running thin though with the impatient girl who kept whining and telling her to fuck her already. The more dirty words that Y/n spewed the more her cock pulsed with need, but it didn't make her hurry up.

"What're you doing?" Y/n murmured, getting pissed when Jennie pulled away fully from her. Her eyes trailed Jennie who was still in her sweats and shirt, the print of her dick was prominent as she didn't have anything else besides the sweats on. All that Y/n was left in were the soaked-through cheeky underwear. Lying exposed and waiting for Jennie to do what she asked for, each little thing had started to leave her mind, not caring about whose hands her fate was left in. It didn't matter what she did since it wasn't in her own hands.

With her eyes on what she needed, Jennie moved up, getting on top of Y/n and straddling her waist. "Taking full control." She simply answered and Y/n's head tilted back to see Jennie grab hold of the fairy lights. Before she had the time to ask or complain, Jennie yanked them off the headboard, the plug getting ripped out of the output all at the same time as they clattered.

"What the fuck?"

"You're not fooling anyone, they just collect dust."

Y/n was about to push herself up, but the air got knocked out of her when Jennie's palm landed against the clavicle right above her chest. She forced her back down and quickly grabbed hold of her wrists.

"Jennie–"

"Make it easy for me and stop struggling because I am not going to stop, Y/n."

"It will fucking hurt and bruise."

The complaints were for nothing, Jennie wasn't listening to her at all and Y/n was unable to move because the woman was straddling her and putting all her weight on her. She started to wrap them around her wrists after forcing them above her head.

"That's exactly what it's supposed to do, hurt, but you will be too fucked to notice it in a while."

It was making Y/n's heart rate spike up, she could never know what Jennie had on her mind, but that was all part of it. It made everything more enjoyable. The fact that at each turn was either heaven or hell, it didn't matter what it was because she always ended up in the middle after a while. Her eyes looked at Jennie, hissing at the tightness of the string and the lights digging into her skin. The older's eyes focused on tying it around her wrists, only shooting a glance at Y/n.

The woman got off of the tied-up girl after making sure she wouldn't be able to get out of the lights wrapped around her small wrists. She grabbed the rest of the string and moved over to the headboard where the girl had installed anti-shake because of how wobbly it was and the complaints from the neighbour of banging late at night. It had only started when Jennie began showing up more often at her place after Asher would leave for practice and tournaments, trusting Y/n to keep his home a home and not invite others. 

"That's unnecessary," Y/n grumbled as her hands were forced to stay above her head, her fingers threaded into the sheets, trying her best to ease the numbing feeling in her fingers as Jennie had made them too tight. She should have known that the woman wouldn't care at all when she asked her to not leave any bruises. Jennie never cared about these things, she always had to do it her way to prove that she was in charge and that Y/n never had any true say in anything. When they parted ways, something was always bruised, either her hips, waist, wrists and at times throat because Jennie didn't seem to control her strength. At times it worked more as a turn-off than anything else because it left her dissociating because of the pain.

"Better than having a needy whore tugging, scratching and pulling on me because she can't go a minute without being stuffed by my cock." Y/n watched as Jennie's tongue poked out at the corner of her lips, toying with it as she looked at the girl she had gotten all tied up. That control it gave her surged right through her each vein before shooting to her cock. It gave her a higher sense of herself. Y/n was all for her to ruin. 

No matter what, her gaze always made Y/n feel like prey. She could see by the look in Jennie's eyes what went through her head. How bad it was, and how much worse it was that she still stayed to watch it happen despite knowing what was going to happen. How she would regret it one day and it would be too late to go back to normal because this was her normal now. 

Her palm planted beside her head as she sat beside her on the bed. Her eyes trailed into the eyes that always held something different. The way they got so empty at times, it was as if Y/n wasn't even in the same room as her. She loved how broken the girl was, how she had broken her because this wasn't the same person she met almost five months ago. This was the person she had made out of her. This was her broken star that would always shine in her eyes. It was almost close enough to make Jennie feel bad about what she had done to Y/n and her life. Y/n was so empty, she was just like Jennie, and Jennie couldn't help but want a person that was just like her. 

"Show me your pretty tongue," Jennie coaxed, her other hand running over the girl's cleavage. The skin was warm, smooth and soft under her palm, she could feel the pounding of her heart when she brushed over the spot where it was resting. That spot where she didn't belong but still made herself comfortable.

Y/n swallowed before opening her mouth and showing off her tongue, the one that Jennie loved having in her mouth or working around her cock. Her hand reached her slim throat and she gently wrapped her hand around it. There was no going back. That had never been an option. Jennie has had her choking grip around Y/n's throat since they met and she was the only one she could rely on to breathe. She couldn't breathe without Jennie, she was the air Y/n needed, and would always die just to breathe. 

Jennie leaned forward, her hair falling around them as her thumb caressed Y/n's pulse point, the veins throbbing under her fingers. She could feel them pound harder and faster the closer she got when she let her spit fall on the girl's tongue before she leaned over to her ear. She could feel the girl shiver in the hold that she had on her when her lips brushed her ears.

"Swallow."

It took no more and Y/n swallowed the warm spit Jennie had let fall into her mouth. It was all shooting even more heat to her clit as her bent knees touched and she tried to get some sort of friction at how uncomfortable it was to not have anything done about her arousal.

"I'm so wet for you." She whined.

Jennie was busy kissing along her ear which was making the girl squirm as she hummed into it before tugging with her teeth at the top.

"Do you want me to eat you out? To lick at your pussy until your legs are shaking?"

"Please."

The words were doing unimaginable things to the girl as she couldn't think straight from how overwhelming it was starting to get. Jennie pulled away and looked at the girl whose eyes were turning docile, begging her with just her eyes as she had a small frown. Y/n willingly became the lamb to Jennie's lion, doing everything just to be eaten up until there wasn't anything left of her, not even a single bone as Jennie was always greedy and took everything, leaving nothing for anyone else.

"I will, under one condition."

Her eyes eagerly watched the woman who reached for her wallet, waiting for whatever the condition would be. It made her stomach drop in the worst way possible. Those colourful pills were grey this time. That control she thought she would have when she first started to take these drugs was all gone. She knew she wouldn't deny it. Her brain was already suffering from how she had taken ecstasy a good five times in just two months. She had yet to recover from last month. Y/n had no control and it was eating at her, Jennie maybe had some control, but what truly had her in a chokehold were the drugs. 

They controlled her life.

"Grey Maserati, we share one because they are dosed at 300 each."

"It will keep me up."

She tried to reason, but Jennie was already taking out one of the five pills in the small zip-lock bag. Nothing was stopping her, Y/n hadn't said no, but just thrown out a reason. She always threw reasons but had a hard time saying no, especially to Jennie, especially to drugs. 

"To around 3 or 4 am since it's already 11, your friends are coming late."

The sound of the pill being broken in half shot to her ears and she looked down as Jennie put the two halves of one pill onto her heaving stomach before she reached for the bottled water on the bedside table. She didn't want it but she couldn't either say no as she watched Jennie take the grey pill into her mouth and wash it down with water. The older woman took the other pill that lay on Y/n's warm stomach and turned fully to the girl.

She couldn't figure out why she couldn't just say no. She wanted to say no, but the urge to say yes was stronger despite knowing the consequences. Her days were already filled with dread, with the doom of one of these days being the last because she couldn't say no. It was hard to say no to something that made her life bearable, to something that made it okay even if it was for five hours before it got worse than it was before she took them.

"Open up, I will make you feel even better, baby. Trust me, it's what you need." She reassured her and Y/n already knew how much better it would all feel. Her mouth opened, and the chemicals spread on her tongue as she waited for Jennie to give her the water too. Jennie loved it when they were both drowning in substances, it made everything so much easier in her life and she knew it was the same for the girl. It worked, it made everything work and feel better. The water spilled from the corners of her lips, the cold running down to the sheets and she swallowed with no turning back.

It felt hopeless in her world. It truly felt like there was no turning back no matter how much she would cry for the past to not take the turns it did. What she could do was try to cry for a better future, but it overwhelmed her. So the only option left was to live in the present and possibly not have a future. 

She put the stuff back onto the bedside table and took the girl's hair tie, putting her hair up. Jennie wasted no more time as she got back to where she had been from the start, her hands running over Y/n's knees and making the girl spread her legs for her. It would kick in within a good 15 to 30 minutes and the arousal they both felt at the moment would increase and everything would feel much better.

The pain would be gone.

The agony, and despair. 

The dread of tomorrow and the doom followed by what happened before what's to come. 

It would all go away.

She was fixing her broken star, she was taking all the pain away by placing herself between her legs after removing her underwear, taking the pain away with the drugs, sex, and alcohol.

Jennie was fixing her selfishly, she was fixing Y/n for when she was there. Jennie was making sure that the girl would only be fixed when she was there, to live in the delusion that she would only feel good when Jennie was there. That when she wasn't there her life was painful and empty and that only Jennie filled those painful voids. It always worked because she would feel even worse tomorrow and Jennie wouldn't be there and the pain would be associated with her loneliness and not Jennie.

The two were addicted to it all.

Whatever mindless sex it was, it turned into a game.

Jennie held back the groan that wanted to push past her throat when her hard dick pressed against the mattress as she laid down on her stomach. She licked her lips, unable to control the way her hips bucked at the view of the pink and wet pussy in front of her, glistening with slickness.

Y/n closed her eyes, fingers gripping onto the sheets as she drowned in Jennie's lips softly kissing along her inner thighs. Her one leg was guided over Jennie's shoulder as she wrapped her arm around the other. Lips gently dragged along her skin, leaving them quivering in anticipation, teeth nipping and dragging over her. It was all there, slowly bringing her to the best place in her dark world. A small gasp followed at the slick tongue that licked up her folds, the firm and warm muscle dragging over her cunt.

Jennie drowned in the taste of the girl, something she had grown addicted to as she could eat her out for hours. She hummed and dipped her head once again, the tip of her tongue teasing around the clenching and leaking hole before she licked back up, gathering the wetness around the swollen clit she circled. It elicited a light moan from the girl who arched her back and tried to push her hips further into Jennie's face–to no avail.

She trailed her hand over the slim stomach that got sucked in at the touch, running back and caressing her thigh. Her tongue still working through her folds, teasing her clit. Lost all again. Jennie's lips wrapped around one of the lips, sucking on it gently–it was all making Y/n let out sighs, whines, whimpers, and moans. She was sensitive to Jennie's touch, so sensitive to it, that it always made her vocal, sounding like she was in bliss which she was. Her mouth continued to work languidly through the girl's aching cunt. The slickness slowly becoming a mess around her mouth and she loved every second of it. 

"Jen, please."

"Tell me what you need, baby."

She mumbled, her lips brushing over the girl's skin and she looked up from between her legs. Y/n's chest heaved, her stomach sucked in and she lay at the perfect arch with her eyes on the ceiling. She planted kisses along her inner thighs, waiting for the response while nuzzling into the warm skin that was scented like flowers. 

"I need you."

"Do you?" Jennie asked to make sure that she was all that Y/n needed. 

Y/n hummed at those words, something between a whine and hum as she closed her eyes in anticipation, tugging on the restraints on her wrists. Jennie could feel her body tense up at the anticipation as she pulled into her.

It was all that Jennie wanted and needed to hear as she went right back, her tongue slowly dragging up once again, the thighs tensing around her. A breathy moan fell from Y/n's plump lips when Jennie wrapped her lips around her clit. Her tongue flicked at the bundle of sensitive nerves, her tongue skillfully working the girl whose breathing picked up in seconds. It wasn't hard to know what the girl liked, Jennie had taken her time to take notice of every reaction and knew what made her scream. She had learned the way Y/n's body functioned. 

The vixen hummed, her back arching as she pushed herself more into Jennie's face, the way the warm and smooth tongue continued to flick at her clit in just the right direction was making her stomach tingle. Her wrists twisted, unable to open her eyes as she was buried deep in the pleasure. Jennie's messy eating of her cunt filled her ears as the woman between her legs was moaning herself. Her tongue lapped up the slickness, smearing it and flicking at her swollen clit like it was what would save her life. 

"So good, it feels so good– your tongue is so fucking good."

Her hips stuttered, unsure of what to do as she was losing control of her body, Jennie harshly suckled, her face buried deep between Y/n's legs, trying to get impossibly closer. A whimper followed and Jennie pulled away, her nose rubbing against the swollen clit as her tongue worked to get more juices to get them up. It smeared on her chin, her tongue not stopping for a second as she came back up and pressed her tongue against the throbbing clit. Her hands gripped tightly onto Y/n's thighs, squeezing the flesh in them and pulling her harshly back down as her hips were lifting, fingertips digging into the girl's skin as Jennie got just as lost in it. 

"I love your mouth."

"You taste so good, I want to live between your thighs," Jennie grumbled in between the strokes of her tongue, her lips coming right back and tightly wrapping around the bud. She tugged on it gently before flicking at it as fast as she could before slowing down. The thighs around her head were quivering more and more, each moan becoming louder and more beautiful than the other. Jennie's cock was throbbing as her body started to get warmer and her hips gently moved, slowly humping the mattress as she couldn't contain herself when eating Y/n's cunt out and listening to the sounds.

Her movements increased, Y/n's body running hot at the warmth of Jennie against her. Her body being held down by the woman as she was slowly losing control. It didn't matter where it was but Jennie always held her down. Y/n's breath hitched, and her eyes closed as the heat became stronger at how Jennie was fucking her using her mouth. It burned, it burned but in the best way possible as the cries were starting to fly out of her mouth unable to hold back.

"Oh my God, fuck–" Y/n's breath fell short, her body convulsing as the orgasm crept up on her. Her thighs shook around Jennie, her back arching, the woman making sure to hold her down as she looked up through her lashes at the dark-haired vixen who was assaulted by the intense orgasm. She pulled onto the restraints, her hands closing into fists as her vision flashed with white, her ears ringing, and any control of her voice was lost as the train of high-pitched moans came out from her parted lips together with Jennie's name.

She heaved, panting for air after not taking in any oxygen for what felt like a good minute but was a few long seconds. Her body didn't get to relax as Jennie wanted to hear her moan her name like that again and continued to abuse her clit with her tongue. Y/n's walls were pulsating, tears gathering in her eyes and spilling from the corners as she tried to find the words to tell her to stop as it was painfully and pleasurably coming right back before she could fully come down.

Her clit was in pain, her walls going through painful aftershocks and Jennie continued to flick at her. Her brain was unable to choose what to feel as her body felt overwhelmed, heating, heart pounding like bricks being dropped on her ribcage. Y/n tried to pull her hips away but she had nowhere to go as Jennie was holding onto her tightly. The whimpers that left Y/n's mouth drove her further, her heat pressing against the mattress while throwing Y/n off an edge she had no clue would come. This time Jennie's name left her in a cry of that line between heaven and hell, it wasn't as intense, but it was painful.

Jennie slowly stopped moving her tongue and kissed her abused bud, it was enough to make Y/n jolt and hum a whine. She moved down, licking up whatever she could as Y/n panted under her, feeling the legs continuously tensing up and relaxing.

"Too much," Y/n tiredly mumbled and the brunette finally pulled away, unable to do more than to use her words as she was held back in all ways. She was powerless and at Jennie's mercy.

Jennie groaned at how uncomfortably erect she was as she had been so for a good 30 minutes now. She had started to grow hard when Y/n had gotten back to the room. Her hand grabbed hold of her thick cock through the sweats, gently caressing it as she used the collar of her shirt and lifted it to wipe her chin and mouth from whatever was left glistening on her.

She finally opened her eyes and looked at Jennie who was already looking at her, Y/n's pupils were already blown and covering all of the grey, leaving them pitch black. It was like looking at someone in a trance, her eyes were drawing Jennie in. Jennie loved everything dead and messed up, especially if she got to further play with it. 

Y/n pulled her legs further up and closed them to try and ease the aftershocks as her stomach was cramping. "It hurts." She complained and Jennie looked over the naked body in front of her before she looked at Y/n's flushed face. Her own body was already warm and she reached for the hem of her shirt, pulling it off, knowing that the E had managed to kick in just a good minute or two ago for her.

"Everything good comes with something bad," she mumbled and those words drilled themselves into their heads. 

"Do you need anything?" Jennie asked as she got off the bed, tossing the shirt onto the chair and walking over to the window. She cracked it open slightly to let in fresh and cool air.

That soft cloud engulfed her body and she felt those feelings she always buried deep and suppressed in herself. The one she would force behind a door whose room was filled to the brim, everything desperately trying to push out but she desperately held it all back. Jennie wasn't supposed to feel, she had learned to be numb and wanted nothing more than to continue it. Although, the problem was that certain things had started to bring her warmth and she had started to long for it every time it went away because somehow she grew fond. Of Y/n.

That cloud of ecstasy formed around her body, hugging her until her body was clammy and each strand of her was standing and taking everything with so much intensity. It coaxed everything out of her and her eyes drifted away from the reflection of herself that she caught in the window where the dark city was illuminated by lights. She swallowed the lump. 

"Remove them, it's hurting,"

"I can loosen them, but they are staying."

Y/n frowned, feeling her body drown into the mattress that was caressing her like feathers. The only thing ruining it was the restraints around her wrists. Jennie walked over to the bed and sat down beside her.

"Why not?"

"'Cause I said so," Jennie answered, her fingers running along Y/n's arms until she reached the lights wrapped around her wrists. She pushed her fingers under them and tugged, slowly loosening them around her and Y/n could feel the blood somewhat flowing back.

"Pretty, star." She whispered and leaned down, catching Y/n's soft lips with hers, melting into each other with sighs falling from their lips as their tongues met. It was so soft, it felt like heaven all over again, it felt good and Jennie opened her mouth further, swallowing Y/n whole who moaned into the kiss. She ran a hand over Y/n's body, exploring the skin that was like silk until she reached her chest and cupped a breast in her hand. Her fingers tugged at the pierced nipples, Y/n moaning and pushing her chest further into her as Jennie toyed around with her chest and nipples.

Their heads tilted, taking each other further in, Y/n sucking on Jennie's tongue, making the older groan and squeeze her breast in her hand. Y/n's whimpers were muffled by the way Jennie was pushing inside her mouth, the two unable to get enough of the softness and wetness that felt too good to be true. Jennie's fingers nimbly worked on Y/n's nipples, tugging on them, pinching and toying around.

She pulled away and looked Y/n in her eyes that were like diamonds, worth more, they were unobtainable stars and held all the life and emotions to them now. It would then all wash away and leave them lifeless again. She loved watching it happen, she was always there. 

Jennie pulled away fully, her heart picking up once again into an unsteady rhythm and she grabbed the water, unscrewing it and taking a few sips as Y/n squirmed beside her. She then proceeded to slowly pour some into the younger one's mouth before placing it right back and standing up.

She couldn't wait much longer as she stripped out of the sweats she had on. Her bright red tip was leaking with precum, Y/n's eyes trained on the thick and long cock that always stretched her out in a painful way unless Jennie was nice enough to stretch her out beforehand with her fingers...It didn't seem to be the case as the brunette let her hair back down and got on the bed.

Y/n tried to twist and looked at the bedside table. "Jennie, the condom." She reminded her that she didn't have any protection.

"We don't need it."

Y/n closed her knees together and Jennie grabbed hold of them.

"We do."

"No, we don't and you know it. Whatever you're trying to do isn't going to help your dignity, baby." Jennie forced her knees apart and held her legs spread as Y/n tried to push her away. The struggle was minimal and the girl slowly got on top of her by forcing her to hold them open, now leaving her completely unable to even try and close her legs.

"Please, Jennie." Y/n pleaded, inhaling deeply as it left her in an even bigger conflict. What was happening was horrible enough, but all she wanted was to save a piece of her dignity and not let them get to a part that's that intimate, something she only let her boyfriend do. She exhaled with her eyes on the ceiling, unable to think clearly as the warm emotions were too strong, that forbidden thing winning over her each time.

"I can pull out."

"No."

Jennie ignored the girl as she kissed along her neck, her cock resting heavily against her cunt as she slowly moved her hips, her scalding dick getting covered in the slick. Her eyes closed as the pleasure felt too good to be allowed for a human to feel. Despite bringing out all those suppressed emotions, it cured her of everything and let her feel happy, it removed the pain. That serotonin and oxytocin was spreading through her whole body from top to bottom. She sighed and stopped, resting her face in the crook of Y/n's neck as she took calming breaths.

"It will be fine and feel better, you want me to fuck you don't you?"

"I do, but not without a condom."

"You don't trust me, do you?" She whispered into her neck, sighing again as her weight completely settled on Y/n and she snuggled closer. Gently wrapping her lips around Y/n's warm skin, sucking it before letting go and licking. "Do you trust me, Y/n?" She questioned, the question was genuine and not just about this as their bodies grew warmer together. A hot puff of breath fanned Y/n's neck who was going through a battle that was lost before it even got to start–all those no's she's always said, they were impossible to say when all those things got freed. She always caved into Jennie because the woman broke down every barrier she tried to put up. 

"I do, but this has nothing to do with trust." She didn't know when Jennie forced her walls down, but she trusted the woman, but she had no clue if that was the right choice. She trusted her with certain things. She trusted Jennie with her dignity, her biggest secret, with her body, and she trusted her with her shame and self-hatred even if Jennie trampled all over her at times. The behaviour got excused in Y/n's head because the woman took her for the person that she is so the least she could do was take Jennie as she is.

"Let me, I want to feel you raw without anything in the way."

She started to pepper kisses along her skin, pushing herself up on her forearms. Jennie pulled away and looked up at the girl. Y/n's heart was picking up once again as she looked into Jennie's eyes that were gazing into hers with what she only got to see when the woman was fucked up on drugs. That was the only time she could see something in her eyes aside from all those negative emotions. There was something genuine in them, but she couldn't tell what exactly it was and she couldn't tell if she wanted to know either. It scared her, Jennie scared her when it came to certain things.

Jennie was scared of whatever that was. 

Y/n's back arched, a gasp falling from her lips as she pulled onto the restraints, thighs tensing up around Jennie when the painful stretch came. Jennie removed her hand from between them as she had pushed her tip inside, her whole body shuddering at the feeling and she let out a muffled whine. It made her catch Y/n's parted lips, shoving her tongue into her mouth.

Her breaths turned ragged as she did her best to slowly fill the girl up and give her time to adjust this time. Y/n's walls were warm and slick, throbbing around her, greedily sucking her in. The cock slowly split her open and pushed further. Jennie's mouth trailed off, kissing along her cheek and jawline, pulling out before pushing in once again, doing her best to not ram her whole cock inside the tight walls right away. The vixen's sopping pussy snugly gripped onto her dick, clasping around her and clenching.

Y/n's chest heaved, picking up as she fell to the deepest pits of pleasure and pain. Jennie's warmth right on top of her and inside her, feeling her deeper and deeper with each slow thrust. The girl was able to feel each detail, the moment driving her further into despair of what would be after. However, it clouded her mind the way Jennie was moving her hips in fluid motions, inching deeper and deeper with each thrust and being able to feel the throbbing of her vein and the way her tip was curved and rubbed perfectly against her g-spot. 

"You're taking me so well, like a good girl, no matter how many times I fuck your tight little pussy you're still so tight, baby." She mumbled, her head dropping into the crook of Y/n's neck when she filled her to the brim. She hummed at the feeling of nothing being between them, having her leaking member stuffed in Y/n's pussy, feeling everything so much better.

"Jennie–" Y/n whined and the latter moved her head up, slowly rolling her hips. She fell short of breath at the feeling of Jennie's dick raw in her cunt. Able to feel every little texture of her cock, from the vein to the pulsating of her tip, how it dragged against her walls and she tugged onto the restraints, whining. Jennie was so deep that it hurt in a way she was used to and found pleasure in now, touching those sensitive spots deep within her and fucking until her stomach hurt. Jennie knew how to make her feel many things.

"What is it, baby?"

"Take them off, please, I want to hold you, please."

By the way Y/n's breathing picked up she could tell that she was losing her patience and the frustrations were flooding in. She clenched her jaw as she reached her hand up, still rolling her hips against the girls, each thrust deep and hard. With some struggling, they loosened and Y/n managed to slip her wrists out. What Jennie thought would be the girl pushing her away was Y/n wrapping her arms under her arms with nails digging into her back.

"It feels so good, fuck your cock feels so good, Jennie...I love it, I love how you fuck me."

It was enough to shoot it all to the woman's cock, making it twitch with some of the words. Jennie's jaw clasped and she balled up the sheets in her fists. Another gasp escaped Y/n's mouth when the thrusts turned rough, Jennie wanted nothing more than to ruin the girl as she slammed her cock inside her, pistoning in and out of her squelching pussy. It felt like she had gotten enough adjusting. The vixen's moans were fueling the frenzy that she had fallen into, breath ragged and the bed and Y/n squeaked with each harsh thrust.

Those low and carnal-like guttural moans and groans came right from between Jennie's lips. "Tell me how good it feels, fucking tell me, Y/n. Say it all because I fucking own you and your pussy. Only I can make you feel these things." Her harsh words were spoken by the whimpering girl's ear, Jennie getting lost between the pain of nails painting her skin red and soft, velvety walls clenching around her, suffocating her cock in the best kind of way. There was no other place she would rather be, no other person to be with, no other girl to fuck. 

"It hurts, but it hurts so good,"

Her pelvic bone slapped against Y/n's skin and she reached her hand down, grabbing hold of her thigh and making her wrap it around her waist. She fucked deeper into her, fucking deep enough to let Y/n feel her where she never thought she would feel anyone. Her lips found her neck, not caring what the girl wanted as she sucked on the damp skin, licking and biting. The younger girl was unable to register any of it as she was being nailed to the mattress, her teeth digging into Jennie's shoulder at how it was all coming over her.

The bed found itself squeaking more for mercy, Y/n whining at how her whole body moved with each thrust. It hurt, but the incoming orgasm was washing it away and her brain had a hard time registering what to focus on. Jennie's thick length was spreading her, each thrust only making the mess bigger, leaving the vixen's thighs to tremble and hips to push into the older for more. It was too much yet too difficult to push her away when she felt Jennie's tip hit deep within her, the wet slapping got louder and hurt as it left them both sore. 

Jennie's moans turned more breathy the longer she pounded into Y/n, trying her best to keep herself from busting already. The exhaustion was taken in rather quickly yet she continued to push to make the feeling last longer. 

Her whole body tensed up with each thrust, twisting the sheets in her hands with veins bulging as she pulled away to look at Y/n. The girl's face was twisted into something that made Jennie groan at how her head was thrown back, chest pushing into her as it moved with each thrust. Lips parted, spilling those erotic moans that drove Jennie more carnal, sweat covering them both. Y/n could feel the muscles flex under her palms with each of Jennie's movements, nails only further digging into the woman's back for grip.

"I'm so close–" Y/n breathed out, the rest of the words getting stuck in her throat as she couldn't control the moans. The lewd sounds of their conjoined heat, moaning, and skin slapping were all bouncing off the walls.

"Can you feel how my cock stretches you? Feel how deep inside you I am baby, I could fucking knock you up right away, have you take all my cum, my babies, make you a mommy the way you call me daddy, hm? "Jennie grabbed hold of Y/n's forearm, pulling away the hand from her back that was stinging as the sweat that covered her body got in the fresh scratch marks. She grabbed hold of the top of her hand and guided it between their bodies as she looked up at the girl whose eyes were hooded, barely kept open.

"Fuck." Y/n exclaimed at the pressure Jennie put on her lower stomach using her hand as she held hers above Y/n's, the cock deep in her hitting her g-spot much better when she pressed down. Each deep thrust into her she could feel her stomach bulge out because of the deep penetration that Jennie provided with her length. Y/n was slowly at the edge and ready to fall off and Jennie could tell that she was right there from how the moans turned into whiny almost cries.

The girl's body convulsed and Jennie looked down at her as she threw her head back, her back arching and she could feel how much her pussy was thudding around her cock. The tight cunt clasped even tighter around her as Y/n cried out a moan, making Jennie groan into the air. Nails dug even deeper into her back and both her thighs shook around the woman.

She let go of Y/n's hand and reached further down, finding the swollen clit with ease and quickly rubbed circles to give her a better orgasm. The moans turned to whiny ones, sounding so light and erotic that Jennie's balls tightened and her erect member hardened more, ready to spill all of her cum. 

Y/n's ears were muffled, and her vision went white as she got lost with no control over her body once again. The warmth was so strong that it felt like her body would melt from how good it felt, being ten times more intense than the other two. Her body was flying from the euphoria. Jennie flexed her stomach, ignoring the banging coming from the neighbour as she could only focus on the girl who was making her heart pick up at how close she was, with her breathing becoming harsh and deep.

As the moans died down she slowed down her pace and only stopped fully once Y/n was whimpering in discomfort under her. She did her best and pulled out right on time as she sat back on her heels. Her lips parted as her moans fell soundless, one stroke and her dick spurted cum all over the pink and sticky pussy where her eyes were trained with her hips stuttering into her hand. Jennie's whole body heaved with each breath, covered in a sheen of sweat, leaving her clammy and exhausted.

"Oh fuck–" This time a whimper fell from her lips, shooting more cum than she expected, her dick throbbing in her hand until the only thing happening was the cum that was left was oozing out of her tip.

Jennie slumped back, her dick growing limp, trying her best to figure out what she was feeling as the emotions felt almost foreign and they always did with the vixen–making her feel things she never did with anyone else. 

The only sounds were their heavy breaths, the one more thud from the other side of the wall and something along the lines of 'shut the fuck up' before it was just them. She took Y/n's hand and helped her up when the girl started to push herself up. Wordlessly she grabbed the girl's shirt that was still on the bed and quickly wiped off her cum from her before throwing the shirt to the side.

"Thank you."

"Don't thank me."

Jennie mumbled as she sat back and pulled Y/n to her, pulling her legs over her own as hers were spread out. She let go of her thighs and reached out to cup her face, her thumb caressing her skin as she pulled her in. "You're beautiful," the woman whispered and kissed her lips. Y/n's hands found their way to Jennie's neck, palms running over her skin that was scorching under her palms. The two took in the feeling that was like brushing feathers gently over their bodies as they without any particular lust soothed each other's bodies and lips.

That rough world, the lust, and those carnal desires disappeared and all that was left was the longing for something deeper. Something that could soothe the pain that lingered on their sore bodies. It was enough to forgive and forget without any words, not caring about any mistakes when they came with this after. It soothed, it got rid of the loneliness they both shared, that emptiness deep within them that they filled with this and hatred.

They pulled away, and Jennie ran her thumb over Y/n's eyebrow, trailing her thumb over her nose, their faces still mere inches away. They gazed into each other's euphoric eyes, stars sparkling, eyes black as massive black holes, sucking each other in. Her thumb ran down further to her plump and pink lips that felt like pillows. Jennie let go of her face and grabbed hold of the hands on the sides of her neck.

"I just want to hold you." She mumbled as there was no stronger desire in her than holding the girl close to her for hours on end. To hold her and keep her right beside herself. She wanted nothing more than to be affectionate with the girl and not just fuck her. Sex wasn't on her mind anymore as she gently kissed the red wrists, soothing them as she gently rubbed them with her thumbs. That desire to make her feel safe because Jennie knew that even if she hurt her, she could make her feel safe, she could make her feel warmth and content. That was all she wanted to do for Y/n even if it was for the night. To make up for the cold ones she wasn't there.

Y/n watched, basking in the feeling as the affection felt overwhelmingly good, not wanting more than for Jennie to leave soft kisses all over her body and hug her. Nothing felt better than when she was high with Jennie. When she was with Jennie in general. Because even if she made her feel the best but also the worst type of things; made her cry, break down and want to die as that felt like the only way out, at least she made her feel. She made her feel that high before it all came crashing down and she couldn't leave it alone because, despite all the bad, only Jennie could bring her back up to that euphoric high without any drugs.

The older left those kisses that she wanted, kissing her wrists softly, in a way no one else ever had even if they needed or didn't need to be soothed. It warmed her from the inside out.

Jennie had all the control because Y/n was addicted to the highs she brought her before she took them away. It left her waiting, anticipating for the woman to give her them again, each time coming to a high before then crashing back down and going through an unbearable comedown. The loneliest she felt was when she was coming down, that was when she needed Jennie the most. It was worse than drugs. Whatever Jennie did and gave her felt better than drugs but tore her apart in the long run much worse than any substance. The vixen couldn't stop chasing after the rush the brunette was able to provide though.

It was an intensity that they both always craved, too far gone in the toxicity of each other to part ways. It had burned their skin and damaged it too much to be able to go back to normal if the scars were to stay forever. It had left them both so ugly together. The longer they stayed the more lost they got and the worse it became and they knew it. They knew how bad it was as they brought out the worst in each other. However, whenever they looked at it; at the ugly in one another, they both just found it more beautiful and addicting every time.

Their flaws felt flawless.

It was a rush that they were addicted to. The constant feelings of being on the edge before falling off and then climbing back up to the edge and waiting for the fall to come again even if it was painful. It was a game of bringing each other up before bringing each other down again.

Y/n hated Jennie because of the control that she had and only let Y/n touch the control now and then. It left the vixen deluded into thinking that she had some sort of control when most of the time it was Jennie.

[Three weeks ago]

"It was so weird," Lisa mumbled and Y/n hummed confused at those words as she handed the lit joint over to her friend. She blinked her eyes off the dryness and reached for the iced tea on the coffee table.

"What was?" The vixen knew that Lisa always had something weird on her mind after smoking, but she couldn't know what it would be this time. She had come over an hour ago and not empty-handed. At this point, if the girl tried to stay away from pills and powders, weed seemed to get her mind off of those things, but barely as she still found herself craving for it more than for food when starving. It felt like she would die if she didn't get a dose. It was itching.

Y/n glanced at her phone when it went off, seeing that it was Ash saying he had arrived–visiting his mother for the weekend. She'd reply later. Y/n's excuse was not feeling good and deciding it would be better to stay. The real excuse would be that she would feel ashamed to see his parents in the state that she was in, she would feel ashamed if she was high around them. Even more ashamed to look them in the eye all while knowing that she was cheating on their son.

At least they had talked it all out after the Summerfest ended and she still felt the relief of knowing that he didn't break up with her but still loved her. That they would fix what wasn't working out and it was all back to normal. They were, but not Y/n.

She felt stuck in a place of hopelessness, and dread, and without the will to live anymore.

"You were weird– you're just being weird in general. Are you okay?"

It made Y/n chuckle as she put her drink back down, but her body language said it all as she pulled her feet up on the couch and her knees to her chest. She closed herself off visibly as Lisa's eyes gazed over her with her eyelids a bit swollen. In the end, she managed to catch Y/n's bloodshot ones. The girl still smiled, there was so much in that smile, not behind it, it was all in the smile as it was a smile that showed how at peace she was with her life crumbling, how she would smile through it and not do anything about it.

"What do you mean are you okay?" Yet she wouldn't admit that she was in agonising pain and that only Jennie fixed her for a few hours before she was left sobbing in the shower. Her tears were like tears in the rain to everyone because she wouldn't cry in front of them anymore. She was too scared to show that she was weak, she couldn't do it anymore, especially not after seeing what someone could do with her weakness. What Jennie did with it. 

"It was maybe weirdly formulated–" Lisa started and Y/n agreed as she nodded, taking the joint that got handed to her. This time she took a bigger drag, letting the gasoline taste fill her lungs to the brim before letting out a cloud into the air that was dim from the smoke that wasn't making it out. "What I mean is...You and Ash seem off, were at least, the whole deal with staying at another hotel room." If it was anyone else Y/n would have snapped, this wasn't Lisa's relationship, but Lisa was her best friend and she listened to her. She let her point these things out because she knew that Lisa cared as her best friend.

Yet this type of care wasn't enough anymore because she couldn't feel the content of someone caring about her. It was void.

"That's that, but you're just down and don't lie because I know that you have been lying for a while now."

"Everyone is down now and then...Me and Ash have worked it all out now." She shrugged out and took another hit from the joint before reaching over to the ashtray to ash it. She sat back and Lisa heaved a sigh in the smoke-filled living room. Her best friend moved along the couch, crawling over to the girl before sitting face-to-face with Y/n. "You've been down for longer than usual, I'm just worried and want you to know that we can talk. We're always here for each other, babe." Lisa pressed and Y/n groaned, throwing her head back against the backrest.

She stared at the ceiling, blinking away the tears in her red eyes, swallowing the sticky lump, and reached the joint to her lips, taking another hit before passing it to Lisa who had her elbow resting against the backrest with her head propped up on her palm.

"I know and you too should know that I would talk to you if it was really necessary, but I am handling it. Just a lot going on with school, work, and a relationship." It was all lies, the handling part because she was coping with it all using drugs and meaningless sex with a woman she was cheating with on her boyfriend. She was handling it by ruining herself even more than she already had. That self-destruction had always worked until it no longer did. It was just a step away from it being her last.

"I feel like I am losing my mind here." Y/n pushed herself up at that and took the joint away from Lisa as they had smoked quite a bit by now. "You're greening out." She seriously said, taking the joint for herself as she didn't need a paranoid Lisa under her care once again.

"Since when is your tolerance so high–" She grumbled and reached over for the bottle of iced tea before leaning back and resting her head on Y/n's shoulder. The TV was playing in the background, but they had been so lost in each other that they hadn't been able to catch the noise from it. Y/n knew her tolerance had rocketed after nearly smoking every day now. The same went with everything else as her nose had gone runny and red, if not bleeding at times.

"Would you suck dick for a career?" Y/n giggled at the question while leaning her head against Lisa's with the joint still burning. Her other hand played around with the bic that she used to even it out.

"No? I don't know."

"I would."

"For real?" Lisa hummed at that. "I know how it sounds, but it's one blowjob for whatever career you want and then you live your life...It's like making a wish except–"

"The genie is in a dick you have to rub instead of bottle." The words that came out of Y/n's mouth made the already giggly Lisa fall into a fit of laughter. Y/n rolled her eyes and this time she reached for her phone in an instant when it buzzed, seeing that it was a message that was private and only one person's messages were on her phone.

It was stupid, but it was a long and boring Sunday and Asher had left in the morning to take the flight to San Francisco. She had texted the woman a few hours ago, but without a reply back and she called Lisa knowing the girl had no work today. The vixen had forgotten the message she sent about two hours ago and hadn't said anything else.

3:22 P.M. im all alone

5:30 P.M. Comin over, just landed Be there in ten

Y/n looked at her best friend who had calmed down and was high as a kite. She'd feel bad if she were to throw her out without a reason, but she hadn't seen Jennie in two weeks. The last time they had been together was on Y/n's last day of the Summerfest and Jennie had flown out to Vegas after for something. She tried to get the girl to come with her but the idea was ridiculous for so many reasons. The biggest wasn't even what she would say to everyone, but travelling and spending even more time with Jennie.

She couldn't deny that she enjoyed the life Jennie brought to her.

She couldn't either deny that besides herself still crumbling with each passing day, her relationship with Asher looked much better after not seeing Jennie.

It did come with constant texts from Jennie–Y/n had assumed she wouldn't even think about her since she tended to not think too much about Jennie. Every time she thought she had forgotten her, the brunette came right back to remind her of who she was. Of what place she now held in her life, the control she seemed to have even when she wasn't there.

Jennie was demanding; Y/n was somehow still obeying, being a willing victim of Jennie, of her power and control. 

Despite the pain and regret, Y/n couldn't stop, they had become her best friends.

Lisa was long gone after an excuse of being called in for a replacement shift at work.

The pain and regret went away with Jennie though, the feline replaced them as she had everything she needed. She was able to replace her best friends, pain and regret.

They had barely managed to start a conversation before Y/n was on her knees as Jennie sat on the couch with the girl between her legs. She released a deep sigh, relaxing on the couch at the mouth working her length. It was hard to say how good it felt to have her dick in Y/n's mouth, the way she would suck on her tip, swirl her tongue, and take her into her throat. The teasing of her tongue, the build-up and the release that made her toes curl and her body convulse, each time losing her vision. Her hand playing with her heavy balls, if not taking them into her mouth. Jennie hadn't gotten to experience such care before and she had realised that she had been looking for love in the wrong places.

Whatever love even was, it held different meanings for everyone.

Pleasure was what she loved.

Y/n only glanced up at the woman who was busy making white lines on her phone using a black card. It was hard not to notice the bruises on her knuckles, the scratches and marks on her neck. It made Y/n work twice as hard. She closed her eyes, stroking down Jennie's cock before moving down and engulfing more in her mouth. Her tongue was flat against the underside and she trailed the pulsating vein as she hollowed her cheeks, moving back up with such suction that Jennie groaned, thighs trembling.

"Fuck–" She breathed out, looking down at the girl whose hair was falling in front of her face as she slurp and sucked around the throbbing hard cock. "I've missed you–this, I've missed this." Y/n hummed and pulled away fully to get a proper breath. Jennie stopped herself from looking back at the coke on her phone and watched the girl guide her mushroom tip over her plump, pillow-like lips that were pink and perfectly wrapped around her every time.

"Say that to every girl back home?"

"What?" Jennie breathed out as Y/n only shrugged and opened her mouth, looking up at Jennie through her lashes. It made her lightheaded as she watched her stick her tongue out and slap the swollen and pinkish tip against her tongue. Y/n wrapped her lips around it, pressing her tongue against the slit, caressing it and pulling back out, looking Jennie right in the eye. The woman always went into overdrive, speechless when she got to see Y/n on her knees with her cock in her mouth. Watching the girl slap it against her tongue again.

She dipped her head, taking Jennie back into her mouth, this time her other hand let go of the woman's thigh and reached inside her boxers. Jennie's chest was heaving, each breath becoming deeper and heavier as she did her best and took the rolled-up bill while Y/n played with her hard balls in one hand, her mouth wrapped around the tip. 

She swirled her tip, looking up as she watched Jennie snort up a line. Her thighs clenched, she found the older woman hot in so many ways, but one thing she truly loved was the dominance she portrayed. The way Jennie was rough, but tender between the lines, there was something different about her touch. The way it all felt like kisses deep within her soul even if they bruised and hurt. Jennie cared.

Her hand worked along Jennie's length, this time a hand coming into her hair, fingers pressing into her scalp as Jennie groaned. "Come on, use your throat for me, baby." She encouraged, knowing that Y/n could do more.

The vixen hummed, slowly working her mouth down before coming back up. She could feel Jennie's eyes on her, the tip was throbbing on her tongue. It wasn't an easy task to get Jennie's whole length down her throat, but she still made it look effortless. It elicited a pathetic whimper from Jennie when Y/n loosened her throat muscles, moaning as she in one smooth motion engulfed the six inches deep in her throat. The feline's thighs trembled, her hand gripping for her life in the hair at the way Y/n's throat had her tip in a chokehold without gagging the slightest.

"Oh fuck," she could only breathe out when Y/n released her cock from the tight grip of her throat. It fueled Y/n on, wanting to be good for Jennie. It didn't end there as she repeated the motion without taking a breather, it made her eyes water the slightest. Jennie's hips buckled up as her feet planted hard against the floor, her hand moving through the dark locks, using both hands to do a makeshift ponytail. She gripped it in one hand, the hair removed from Y/n's face.

Now she was able to see the tears running down the girl's face whose eyes had been bloodshot ever since she entered. Spit covered her chin as it ran down further, her cleavage being in view because of the spaghetti strap top she had on with a push-up bra– it enhanced her small breasts. Jennie's whole length throbbed at the mess she was on her knees in front of her. There was something so hot about the girl in general, but especially in this position as Jennie thrust her hips into her relaxed throat because the vixen didn't resist. Y/n provided her with her throat, letting Jennie fuck it as she massaged her balls in her hand, playing with her hard and big balls. 

"I'm gonna cum, I'm so fucking close now–god, you're such a fucking slut the way you suck cock. It's like you were born to do this." Jennie let out through her heavy breaths with her hips stuttering as she watched the younger girl who was getting her throat stuffed, the way Y/n's eyes rolled back, the lewd sounds of her slurping, spit creating a mess on her cock and Y/n's chin. The grip on her hair was tight as she continued to bob her head to match the thrust, taking Jennie into her throat, reaching her base, and tickling Jennie's stomach with her nose before being pulled back.

She felt the heavy balls tighten in her hold, she managed to slip out of Jennie's grip and pulled her mouth away unfortunate for Jennie. She didn't have time to complain when Y/n's hand quickly jerked at her cock, squeezing around her tip and her balls. It was the least Y/n could do to not have to swallow everything and get Jennie mad again. She knew better by now. Her body convulsed, making her bite down on her fist to stop the sounds that tried to push through the back of her throat. The cum spurted out from the slit on her tip, thick ropes of white and thick warm cum flew and Y/n leaned closer, closing her eyes and sticking her tongue out.

The dick that had been pulsating in her hold slowly grew soft and Y/n twisted her hand up one last time, making Jennie wince and slump back. Her eyes were on Y/n who had that white release on her face, taking it on her pink tongue too. The vixen winced but swallowed it down before she reached for the napkins on the table where the bag with weed was lying and the one with coke that Jennie had taken out.

"What happened to your hands?" Y/n finally managed to ask as she wasn't getting her throat abused by the woman who was always rough with her—in some instances, she wasn't, but Y/n didn't mind either as long as she got pleasure from the woman which she did get in many ways. 

She couldn't help but wonder what it was that had happened. It was a curiosity that didn't want to go away no matter how hard she tried not to care, but she did for many reasons. She somehow felt the urge to want to know what went on in the billionaire's life and she didn't like this intruding urge. The girl wiped the still-warm cum off of herself, still cringing at how she swallowed it, but it felt like she had no other choice. 

"Nothing."

Was all she got as a reply, looking up at Jennie who was fixing her pants, adjusting herself before zipping them up. She cleared her throat and looked down at Y/n who was already looking up at her, the woman's body covered by a sheen of sweat and her brown eyes black from her pupils that had grown from the coke, cheeks flushed and her heart pounding. One of the bruised hands reached down and she pulled Y/n up and into her lap.

"They're bruised, something did happen." Jennie hummed at that as Y/n was right since her knuckles were sore and bruised. Her hand ran down to Y/n's ass, gripping it through the sweatpants as she sniffled, her nose stuffy from the powder and she picked up her phone that she had placed on the couch. Y/n looked at the screen that was black with two more lines on it. She gestured with her head towards the rolled-up bill and Y/n picked it up without any complaints, she had trouble saying no when she knew that she should, but didn't want to. 

Her eyes watched the girl who took a line like a pro, still looking as hot and perfect when doing drugs with her. She had started it slow, but now it was a constant when she saw the girl, they would get high because Jennie got high every day and she always made sure to leave stuff for Y/n. It was out of good heart because she knew the girl would need either coke or speed to get through a day now. Y/n was like a car now, only working when she was fueled, and Jennie made sure to fill her with all these things. It left Y/n coming to one person and one person only for fuel. Leaving her dependent on Jennie to be able to function.

"I got attacked by a girl's boyfriend because of a misunderstanding."

Y/n got her reply at last when she finished, the powder smoothly travelling through her nose, leaving a bitter taste after running down her throat and leaving her mouth numb, her face numb. Jennie took the rolled-up bill from the girl who frowned at the words. Her eyes scanned Jennie, looking for whatever answers she would probably never get because she had no clue who she was sitting with. 

It was as if she knew Jennie, but then she did these things that Y/n tried to push away and separate from the Jennie she wanted to know and not the Jennie that she was. She painted those red colours green whenever they came to light, it made it easier to deal with. It made it easier to stay.

"Mhm, for fucking her too good?"

She was used to the model of a girl's attitude, she liked it, she also loved putting the girl in her place which was almost an impossible task. The question did catch her off guard because the girl had never really said anything like that before, if so she had encouraged her to walk out and fuck someone else. Which Jennie did at times, but some problems had started to happen in her sex life. Jennie felt embarrassed and humiliated, it had all brought her to a new low in her life and she had no clue what to do about it. It was too much to look for help because it had already hurt her ego.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Despite it all, Jennie played it off the way she had always done in her relationships even if she wasn't in one with Y/n. It just kicked in from how close they were and this was someone she wanted to keep around. She placed the things aside and snivelled, wiping her nose as her heart was beating in an unsteady rhythm, her body warm and sweaty, the dangerous emotions spiking tenfold, making her a much easier fuse to ignite because she was filled with fuel.

"The scratch marks on your neck and the one on your cheek. Sure had fun tussling in bed didn't you? Until her boyfriend caught you two." Y/n reached her hand up to Jennie's face as there was one red streak on her cheek as if a cat had scratched at her face. The blood was dry and the wound was healing. She hadn't cared when they first started to fool around and she started going behind her boyfriend's back. Jennie would have some sort of marks all the time–albeit less now or none at all most of the time–but they felt like a big fuck you to Y/n's face now.

Her thumb brushed along the mark on her cheek before she glanced down at the ones on her neck. It felt stupid to leave any marks of her own if they would only get mixed up with the other ones. Did Jennie fuck every girl the same way she did with Y/n? Did she put the same effort into every girl she ran across? Was Y/n just another fuck with no distinctive difference? Was she just another one of her girls? 

It felt degrading. It didn't feel right to be feeling this way, but it didn't feel right to know that Jennie was possibly treating Y/n like one of her other girls.  

"I'm telling you the fucking truth, aren't I?" Jennie snarled and yanked Y/n's hand away from her face, her eyes hard at the accusations thrown at her. It didn't make Y/n falter or apologise for asking more questions even if Jennie insisted on telling her the truth. However, it was the truth to something Y/n hadn't been asking her about. She wanted to know if she was just another girl she fucked in the city.

"But you were in bed with her," Y/n stated as a matter of fact, slowly feeling her pulse go up from the cocaine coursing through her bloodstream. Her mind was brought to a different euphoria although it didn't push away these other things, it enhanced them. It made everything worse.

"So what if I was?"

She gazed into Y/n's eyes, waiting for the girl to give up the fight she was starting and apologising for starting it in the first place.

"I'm just fucking asking."

Y/n had snapped at last because of the answer she got and felt anger shoot right through her as she yanked Jennie's hands away from her body. She proceeded to get out of her lap and stand up. The woman was irking her now, not just the woman, the state she had come in made everything crawl over her the second Jennie entered. 

Y/n knew that they weren't together and that she had a boyfriend, but she didn't like being part of a cycle that probably consisted of a hundred other girls that Jennie wet her dick in. It was even more disgusting and annoying when Jennie saw her almost every week. It made Y/n feel used and dirty, like just a toy for Jennie to release into and feed her ego for the day, knowing she was fucking someone hot.

"Don't fucking raise your voice at me and—" Jennie got cut off when the door to Y/n's bedroom slammed closed and Jennie hadn't even been able to finish her sentence. It spiked her anger ten times more as she shot up from the couch because the disrespect was getting hard to handle. She wanted to get her point across, make Y/n realise and say that Jennie could fuck whoever she wanted to when she was away while Y/n would patiently wait for her like her doll. That she wouldn't try anyone else aside from Jennie unless she wanted to end up hurt.

Y/n's attitude was one that Jennie wanted to handle and be able to tame, but it always made her threads snap and she always exploded. Her fists were already clenching in anger as her tongue had all types of profanities ready to be screamed at her.

She tried to open the door– "fucking open before I break it down, Y/n," she gritted out. Unable to contain the anger going through her veins, overweighting the cocaine that probably made it worse using the side of her clenched fist she hit it. It made the door shake, but it didn't make Y/n open nor did it make her reply.

"I told you to open it!"

"Y/n!"

It made Jennie bang at it harder and once again before doing it again and again until her chest started to heavy in more anger. She felt unvalidated because the girl wasn't opening it. She wasn't reacting, but Jennie was and it only irked her more. Y/n was supposed to be crumbling under her and not sitting silently, silence was threatening to Jennie. She couldn't know what it meant and it only made her lose it more.

"Punch my door one more time you fucking junkie."

And Jennie did because the last thing she was going to do was listen to the girl or do as she said. There was no way that Jennie would take orders like these from someone else, she made sure to do it extra hard by kicking at it instead. The words that pointed out her addiction only added to a fire that was out of control, one that would be hard to get under control as she felt it all coming, it was a mistake to point out her denial.

The door got yanked open and Y/n looked at her door to see a dent from the kick.

"What is your problem!?"

"My problem is your fucking attitude!" Jennie screamed right back and blocked the door from getting closed in her face by blocking it with her forearm. She forced it open and pushed her way inside as she grabbed hold of Y/n's forearm, her grip was twisting the skin from how harsh it was, wincing pain coating Y/n's skin. The pain buried itself deep within her and she was slowly finding solace in Jennie's violence that felt like peace, that felt like kisses and love yet it stung. 

She forced her onto the bed–the girl wasn't going to tower her in this scenario. Jennie would make sure she knew who was the one who called the shots. Show Y/n who was the one who was supposed to be respected. She'd go on and on until she would understand and be nothing but someone who got down on their knees for Jennie because she would realise how big Jennie was compared to who Y/n was. Y/n was no one compared to her in the end.

"No one is telling you to fucking stay and put up with it like some masochistic perv. You can busy yourself by leaving and fucking someone else."

"Don't fucking scream in my face."

Jennie pushed Y/n back down, the force echoing when her palm collided between her collarbones, a squeak coming from Y/n and she wasn't allowed to stand up. Jennie was stronger. Y/n would always be weaker, there were certain fights she would never win, but she would put up a fight for as long as possible even if it only dug her grave deeper. 

Her finger pointed right in Y/n's face as she warned her. She towered the girl who had to lean back to look up at Jennie. Y/n heaved a sigh as she looked at Jennie with a scowl of anger and uncertainty about what to do. One thing she was certain about was that she didn't like Jennie's finger in her face. Another thing she knew was that it rang bells she couldn't pinpoint, but it evoked fear in her and it was nostalgic but she had no clue why. It was a blur, and her mind only dissociated in fear of what could happen. She didn't want to feel more pain of Jennie shouting at her and treating her with bruising kisses. It made it easier to forget after if she dissociated. 

"Get your fucking finger out of my face." Y/n spat out.

"What're you going to do about it?" Jennie challenged her, not moving an inch. "You don't fucking tell me what I'm going to do, do you understand?" She continued, her finger still in Y/n's face who was starting to feel like she was being humiliated because of how Jennie was keeping her in this place. She did like it when someone kept her grounded, but she didn't like it when all her control was taken away. It was suffocating, it only scared her further, and it only pushed her into breaking down and begging to be allowed to breathe. 

There was no meeting halfway between them though. No compromising as they were both stubborn.

"I'm not your fucking dog, so get your finger out of my face or just get the fuck out of my place altogether."

"Don't fucking try me, Y/n– you either understand or I fucking make you understand."

"Then fucking make me! What are you going to do? Fucking beat me up like the boyfriend!?" Y/n raised her voice and shoved the hand away from her face. The gesture ignited the fuel that had been added, the fire reaching the path that was filled with it. Jennie was twitching to do what Y/n asked her for. It was all so close, but she knew what happened when she went there, Jennie's bruises were still healing, and she still wanted to have Y/n. At this point, she couldn't tell if the girl would leave or stay if she took it there. It felt like she was so dependent that she would stay and Jennie was seconds away from testing her luck.

"I might fucking do it if you continue to test my patience with you, whore!" It sparked so much anger in Jennie when the girl wasn't listening. When she pushed Jennie away. When she continued to test unknown waters. She grabbed hold of her jaw and forced her back onto the bed before she even had the chance to try and get up. The struggle worked little when Jennie pinned her down on the bed. She took advantage she would always have of being stronger than Y/n physically, and mentally too. There were battles Y/n would never win and she only needed to learn which ones.

Jennie was willing to show her.

"Fucking do it, Jennie, I fucking dare you to do it. I want you to go through with your empty fucking threats for once." Y/n continued to add fuel to the fire they had both started a long time ago. The one that was out of control and they only seemed to make it bigger. She gripped onto Jennie's forearm, but her grip wasn't budging from her jaw and her weight was on top of her. It maybe would give her a reason to throw Jennie out of her life once and for all if she went through with those empty threats. At least she hoped it would. She was scared that Jennie would go through with it and it would register as love and care in Y/n's brain.

"Shut the fuck up!"

"Just do it or are you too much of a fucking pussy. All you do is talk and act big when you are nothing but a scared fucking cunt. Who do you think you're fooling?" Y/n hissed, the grip was getting harder on her jawline and she stared Jennie in the eye. The anger was swirling in both of their eyes, their hearts beating in a rhythm of what was a messed up march song for a war neither of them had the right to partake in. That  Y/n dared to look her in the eye, that she did so in a challenging way was only making sparks fly and the sky was filled with dark grey clouds of toxic smoke. They were both inhaling it like drugs.

"I told you to be fucking quiet!"

"I told you to go through with your empty threats."

"Who do you think you are? You're just another fucking girl on my dick so know your place."

"Do it, you fucking bitch."

The throwing of words continued as they were screaming in each other's faces. Nothing they said made much sense anymore as the screaming had gotten out of control. They weren't even fighting about what it started with, but it had turned meaningless yet it meant the world to both of them to be right at the moment. To be in control. To win. To not know when to stop because they could only stop when the other gave up. It didn't matter if their throats were sore and their skin bleeding, leaving them dry from the words that continued to cut through their skin and leave scars for them to admire later on.

"Listen to what I am telling you, Y/n, listen to me you low life of a fucking bitch that I spit on!" She bellowed, the patience was gone now. "Fucking whore that spreads her legs every occasion and would fuck anyone with a status because you're worth nothing." Jennie's voice was a harsh rasp, her grip only tightening as her other fist clenched and she had no clue what to do with it. It was itching, it was moving, it was rising and it was falling, fighting an internal battle for the girl while also fighting with her. It was overwhelming Jennie, but she had yet to get her point across. 

"You're nothing but an entitled and coke-addicted junkie–"

It finally happened and Y/n flinched, closing her eyes and looking away as her whole body tensed up. She didn't know what to do or how to react when Jennie–didn't punch her–punched the mattress right beside her head. It was so close to her face that she felt the wind of it, that she could feel it by her ear. It made the fear wash over her and Jennie felt the grip loosen on her forearm. Y/n shaking under her, trembling and barely breathing. She had been scared the second Jennie pinned her down because she knew that she had no chance against the woman when it came to strength and at some point, she would have to give in. 

Whatever that unsteady rhythm was, it turned into one that was heavy and her throat closed up, that lump killing her. She knew that she had been pushing her buttons, but Jennie had been terrible towards her. Jennie was always terrible towards her. She put up with it because the billionaire was amazing towards her just as much as she wasn't. Jennie maybe left Y/n trembling in fear, feeling sick from it as it built up and she could throw up from how weak and scared Jennie truly made her feel. It was as if her limbs gave up, knowing they would never win.

Jennie felt her heart drop as Y/n didn't pull away or fight back but only used her forearm to cover her eyes. The older had a hard time understanding it as everyone always pulled up a fight, they always continued after, but Y/n just collapsed right under her. It scared Jennie. Why couldn't Y/n put up a fight, be more than just prey, and make Jennie look less horrible? Why was Y/n shaking instead of shouting, and trying to fight Jennie back with more than words? The vixen wasn't leaving any marks on her.

Jennie could still catch the way her lips trembled, the girl taking in a shaky breath. "Let go of me," that was a tone she never wanted to hear from the girl. That was a tone she had never heard from anyone. She sounded scared, terrified even, she sounded broken in a way Jennie didn't want her broken, in a way that would make her leave. It was an actual docile plea for mercy. It didn't make Jennie feel in power, it made Jennie widen her eyes and watch how their world crumbled right underneath them. 

"Y/n..." Her tone faltered and she let go of the girl's jaw.

"Please just–" Y/n couldn't finish it as she felt stupid enough already and didn't want her voice to tremble in front of Jennie. It felt like the woman would use it against her. Whatever weakness she would show would make Jennie trample her even more. Scared Jennie would hurt her even more if she started to sob. 

The weight on top of her disappeared and Y/n turned to her side as she curled up into herself to try and understand what had happened. She had hoped they had been empty threats. She didn't want to believe that Jennie could be this bad person when she made her feel so good too. It didn't make sense that someone who made her feel so good, could make her feel so scared, it left her conflicted about figuring out what Jennie was. If she was good or bad, or maybe both. She had no clue what to do if she were to figure it out.

For the first time in ages, Jennie's numb self from the drugs, the death that she was inside out, disappeared. The drugs not being enough to numb her, she wasn't able to numb herself the way she did with everyone else. The way she didn't care about anyone else, but herself ever since she got a taste of her new life. She felt the lump in her throat as she nervously rubbed her palms against her thighs while sitting on the bed beside Y/n. She did her best to put all her anger aside which was always hard, but the other emotions were overwhelming and made it easier. Y/n made it easier, the thought of her walking out made it easy.

"I–Y/n..." Jennie started and reached out for the girl who blanched at her touch. She could hear the sniffling and suppressed sobs as she had her face buried in one of the pillows. Y/n's body shaking from how she tried to keep it in. Her jaw trembled as she opened her mouth to come up with words, but she looked away from Y/n and at the door. 

Would it be better to run away or stay? Jennie had no clue how to deal with these things, with the consequences of her actions. Her sweaty palms continued to rub against her thighs, taking deep breaths while trying to think, trying to calm down and not get more scared than she already felt. 

"I didn't mean to scare you like this. I swear, it's—it's from the coke, it makes me angrier than I am...I would never hurt you, I mean—" Jennie tried to find the words, tried her best to find a good enough excuse for this as she was going out of her way for the girl. Jennie was trying her best to find an excuse that would work, not an apology, but an excuse. She couldn't apologise for things she didn't control, could she?

She moved off the bed and quickly walked to the other side with her knees shaky. She kneeled on the floor and reached for Y/n's hand who tried to pull away, but Jennie couldn't stop her stubbornness. She still wanted Y/n to listen to her and she held onto her hand with her both.

"Please, I didn't mean that. I would never hurt you, you know that because...I didn't hit you or hurt you." In the end, Jennie could have beaten Y/n to a pulp if she wanted to. She was quite sure that what mattered was that she didn't and that was enough. That made her good enough if she could, but didn't. She would never hurt Y/n that way even if she could.

The hold on Y/n was gentle now and the girl still covered her face with her free forearm. The gentle hold only confused Y/n further.

"It was from the coke, I care about you. It's okay since I didn't hurt you, Y/n, please, you're aware of it." She continued to desperately plead with the girl, trying her best to convince Y/n of the words that she lived by.

Y/n tried to pull her hand away, but Jennie held onto it. Something made Y/n's stomach still twist in a both good and bad way when she felt Jennie place her lips against her knuckles before cupping her hand and resting her forehead against it. "I didn't mean to do that." She excused herself as she couldn't figure out what more she should do. She genuinely felt terrible and didn't want to lose the girl even if she didn't have her to begin with.

"It won't happen again."

It went silent, the room being filled with the small sniffles and their hearts continued to pound. Y/n's body was warm and despite these bad things her body was always in euphoria and it took away from the bad, it left no bad in the memories. Her body was still pulled to the source of the only good left in her dull and lifeless life that she didn't want to live unless it was right by the source of life.

"Promise."

"I promise." Y/n let Jennie cradle her right after and soothed her pain by being in Jennie's arms, she kissed every little red mark that she left on her. She held her, and she did so gently while helping her calm, helping her feel safe in her arms. The woman made sure to show her why there was so much left to stay for despite the mistakes she committed. God, she held Y/n so gently, she kissed it all away so softly that the girl fell asleep in her arms and stayed in them the whole night, not wanting Jennie to leave.

Jennie didn't keep her promise though, but Y/n had grown used to it and she could tolerate it as long as Jennie hadn't laid a hand on her. It did start in the hotel room when she for the first time showed this side when fighting, but it only escalated. It was fine though. It was fine to scream, punch surfaces and call her names as long as Jennie didn't land any of those forceful punches against her. She got used to them flying right by her face and Jennie then excused it while Y/n would cry and break down on the floor unsure of where she was supposed to go.

The two were each other's prisoners in the end.

[Present]

Jennie's eyes were stuck on the girl in her arms as Y/n was hugging around her waist, resting with her head on her chest. The sex had played a minor part now as the woman wanted nothing more than to hold Y/n and be close to someone. It was the ecstasy working, but it brought out the things she wanted to do too and she knew about but avoided. Jennie had always longed for someone to hold, but it never worked. Y/n was too good for her and Jennie would be there for her even if it meant like this, in a way that wasn't supposed to be. 

She didn't want it to end though and she knew that she had made many mistakes. Y/n still kept her around. It only meant that Y/n took her for who she was and no one else did. No one else let Jennie hold them and she had always been empty and alone until Y/n showed up.

"Do you have any aspirations left?" Y/n mumbled, melting into Jennie's touch who ran her fingers under the tee she had on, caressing her back gently. She traced her ridges, the skin that was hot as they lay above the sheets. Her touch was soft and gentle, but it could be cold and agonising. Y/n dwelled in both.

Jennie craned her neck to look down at Y/n and the question left her thinking deeper than she usually did. It dug up the answer she avoided, the things she never talked about because she was scared, she was embarrassed and didn't know how to talk about. There had never been anyone to listen and even if there was she was scared they would make fun of her for being vulnerable.

The drugs or not, she always numbed it, but then being with Y/n and being on molly took away the numbness and brought everything to life. She exhaled through her nose and hugged the girl closer to her.

"Business-wise, there will always be new things to achieve, I think it's outside of it that I have aspirations, goals and things I want to reach, things I want to become aside from who everyone knows."

"Like?"

Jennie pouted to herself, still finding it hard to bring up as it always brought a lump to her throat and made her eyes hot when they never should be. She wasn't supposed to be this way. Her walls weren't supposed to come down, but they somehow cracked around Y/n. The girl was so gentle with it, she didn't force them open, and she made them crack with such care that it didn't hurt Jennie. It was the opposite of how she tore Y/n's walls, forced them down and trampled all over them all while hurting her to get out everything from Y/n.

"I think...I want to change, be better, and stop committing the same mistakes because they always cost me someone I care about." It was the short answer of it all, but she couldn't bring herself to give Y/n the longer one. She had yet to come through through those cracks in her walls. "Do you have any?" Jennie asked, fingers running along Y/n's warm spine.

The question back hit Y/n right in the guts, her stomach tied in knots and turned inside out before getting dragged through broken glass. She had no clue. She had lost track of her life a few months ago and nothing mattered anymore. Nothing seemed important. Her will to chase after something, anything had died. She had the drugs to suffice, but how long could they keep her satisfied until her life would make even less sense?

"I don't have any–I don't know what I want,"

She wanted to break out of the loop. The loop that she was stuck in, but couldn't break. The one of drugs, parties, and Jennie.

"I feel lost and like there's no going back now, Jennie–" She stopped as it washed over her for the first time. It had been present, but only now did she truly realise where she was with her life. What her life had turned to. Jennie tried to hold onto the girl who pushed herself up and sat, making Jennie follow suit as she sat between her legs. Y/n's life was over, there was no turning back. She had lost to drugs and Jennie. It was over for her, wasn't it? She would be stuck here all her life with no digging herself out of her grave because all it would do was dig deeper. 

"Y/n."

"I keep hurting someone I love, I am this person I never thought I would be, but it's like I was this way all along and it just took time to come out. My life feels lost and I am fucking looking for solutions in places I won't find them because only I can fix it, but can't seem to do...I feel–" She felt more than lost. Y/n felt like she had died already and was just wasting her time on earth. There was no place for someone like her because she wouldn't do anything good with her life anymore. This was it. All she could do was rely on and hope that the people she had wouldn't abandon her. That Jennie wouldn't leave.

Jennie inhaled at the feeling that made her jaw clench as she wrapped her arms around Y/n. She buried her face in the back of her neck and hugged Y/n close. Jennie proceeded to do what she liked to do when her mind spat the truth at her. She painted a deluded picture because her life was supposed to be perfect. It never had been and it felt like it never would be, but she still wanted to change herself even if she maybe wouldn't be able to quit everything like the drugs and parties, at least she could quit the person she was. Jennie wanted to run away from herself and be someone perfect–if that meant having someone.

"It's okay."

"Nothing is, Jen. Life just became meaningless all of a sudden and I no longer want to live my life."

"You're too young to end your life, Y/n."

"I already did when I got involved with you."

Jennie hummed at those words as Y/n played with the woman's fingers who had her arms wrapped around her waist. Jennie knew what she had done to the girl and Y/n knew what she had allowed to happen.

"You're the only one that makes me feel alive," Y/n admitted. Because despite feeling dead from the inside every day. Jennie made her feel things, she made her feel alive and made everything else disappear. It crawled over her, although in the best way possible when Jennie moved her hair to the side and gently kissed the side of her neck. Y/n couldn't lie, she loved the way Jennie made her feel, the highs she brought her to and the way she made her life feel so much better. It was all Jennie, no one did it better.

"You're the only one who has stuck for so long," everyone left, no one stayed forever aside from the people she paid to stay. Jennie knew why they left. She was the sole reason as to why she was alone and why no one wanted to stay. Jennie only had herself to blame but couldn't lower her ego and do it.

"I don't think anyone will stay if they find out." Y/n turned her head and faced Jennie who lifted her head. Their eyes which were filled with euphoria and pain ignited a spark that always connected them and Jennie leaned in. Her nose brushed over Y/n's before their parted lips brushed over each other too. "I'd always stay," Jennie reassured the girl and closed the small gap between them.

Jennie stayed even if she knew all these things about Y/n, the same way Y/n stayed despite knowing what Jennie was.

It wasn't long until dawn came and that was when the night ended for them.

Y/n woke up the next morning to an empty bed and a distorted mind with her world spinning from the come down after taking ecstasy. She knew that she shouldn't take any for over a year as she had been taking the pills once or twice a month if not more at times. It had left her dissociating, losing her memory, and more depressed than she was before she started to abuse them. Suddenly they were the only thing that brought serotonin to her life and Jennie.

3 P.M. was when the girl woke up and found herself in the bathroom and before she could get in the shower her glossed-over eyes landed in the mirror. She couldn't figure out how far rough was supposed to go because it went to different lengths with Jennie. Her hips and waist had small bruises from her fingertips, her wrists looked like they had been strangled, and she was too drained to feel anger, but more so despair at the hickeys left on her neck. The only thing that hurt was Jennie still lingering between her thighs and wrists. At times it felt like Jennie was just taking out all her feelings on her, but she ignored it because it was better than Jennie possibly taking it all out in a different way.

Her phone went off a few times again as it had been buzzing since she woke up. She decided on the most important person at the moment which was Lisa since she and two other friends were coming over. It was a text saying she was on the way and would be there in 30 minutes. That 30 minutes were spent getting ready and covering every bruise before Lisa showed up.

"You don't look too good," Lisa commented and walked into the bedroom where Y/n was slumped on the bed which sheets she had changed. She busied herself with her phone as she had a message from Asher.

9:12 A.M I hope everything is fine, call me if you need to talk or something. I will be home on Monday morning The games are starting soon. Love you so much baby

Y/n sighed as she looked at the texts and looked up at Lisa who threw her bag to the side and crawled on the bed.

3:33 P.M. love you and good luck

She had no clue how else to reply. Every single reply sounded forced when she wrote it and she decided to keep it short to not make it even more obvious. She did talk to him last night and it was enough. It was hard to express herself the same way she used to as the words didn't come as easy anymore. Those love you's, I care about you, miss you and more. It no longer felt right and the shame and guilt made it worse.

Y/n huffed when Lisa slumped down on top of her because she didn't get a reply from the girl who looked like she was in the deepest hole in her life.

It was riveting to see her best friend this way.

Y/n looked different, and not from her looks, but something else.

"What?"

"See, you still look like a black cat, but more of a depressed one."

Y/n groaned and looked back at her phone that she held away from Lisa to make sure she wouldn't get a glimpse by accident. It wasn't like her friend was peeking, but she wanted to see what the private messages were. She had fallen asleep around 6 am with Jennie.

1:12 P.M. Had to leave for the new work thing Left you a little boost, figured you might need it if you are going out Text me if you need something or can't get in somewhere Just text me if you are going out or doing anything

Y/n quickly reached for the bedside drawer and Lisa lifted her head, looking up from her phone at the abrupt movement. She watched the vixen under her rummage blindly through the drawer until she pulled out a small bag of white powder.

She knew Jennie had started some new branch in her company, expanding for more than owning a billion-making stockbroker company. Somehow she knew what was going on in the feline's life because she included her whenever they met.

Then came the wanting to know when she was out or with whom. It also came with getting in everywhere because of Jennie.

"Is this like a new thing?"

"What do you mean?" She questioned as she inspected the bag; it was snow.

Jennie always left her these drugs whether she asked or not. She knew the girl would feel like shit for the coming days or however long the come down would last. It would make her feel better even if it only made everything worse in the long run. She didn’t want Y/n to go through terrible withdrawals.

Lisa gazed at Y/n worriedly who put her phone aside, leaving the texts from Jennie on read.

"You're on a coke diet." Lisa deadpanned her suspicion because she could see it on her.

"How would you know?"

"Dated Philip who became a coke addict. You've lost weight that you aren't able to afford to lose when you are already fucking tiny Y/n." Lisa exclaimed the obvious and pushed herself up onto her knees. Y/n sat up and leaned back against the headboard, putting the bag on the bedside table. She knew that she had lost weight she wasn't supposed to lose.

"It's like 5 pounds, I'm 110 now." Lisa rolled her eyes at that as the 5'8 girl was always trying to justify things that weren't right.

"First of all I'm not addicted and second of all, what if I've lost some weight it happens." Y/n went on defending as she wasn't addicted to cocaine or any drugs. She was sure that she would be able to stop the second she wanted to, but she would have to want to do it first.

There were many reasons as to why she didn't want to stop it. It killed the pain, it let her feel better when she wasn't with the only person who seemed to take her as she was. It killed the guilt and shame when she was high and she didn't feel like killing herself until she did and re-dosed to make it go away.

"Then why are you so defensive about it?" Lisa calmly asked to not anger the girl because it seemed like it was stepping on her nerves. The topic was sensitive which let her know enough–not enough as there was more than coke to it all.

She didn't know about Jennie and what Y/n's life truly had become aside from the partying, drugs and alcohol. One thing she did know was that Y/n wasn't someone who could afford a cocaine addiction as it wasn't cheap.

"Because you are forcing something that isn't true onto me."

Y/n looked down at her hands and played with her fingers. It was heavy on her chest and she wanted nothing more than to tell Lisa everything. To confess her sins and get rid of the burden on her, but she couldn't. She felt too ashamed and it was killing her, she was killing herself because it was all her fault.

"Your nose is red, you come high to classes, work, and everywhere else I see you."

"You do it too."

She continued to try and justify it, but she knew that she couldn't go through a class without being high or doing a shift without crashing unless she was high. It was as if it was her lifeline and she couldn't function without it. Y/n continued to tell herself that she wasn't addicted though and that she could stop because she knew that she could, but the withdrawals would be too much at a time like this. She couldn't stop now when she needed to work and finish school.

It wasn't an addiction.

It was just helping her until she was done and then would be able to go through withdrawals without them getting in the way of her life.

"When we go out and not every time–" Lisa said and reached for her friend's hands, taking them in hers. She knew that she was guilty of taking drugs too when going to parties, but it wasn't all the time, unlike Y/n. It felt like every time she saw Y/n she was either high or going through a comedown. "Where do you even have the money to afford doing coke so often?"

"I work just like you."

"I'm just worried."

Y/n pouted, she slipped her hand out of Lisa's grip and reached for the small bag.

"It's pure." She prompted and despite the concerns and not wanting her friend to go through tough times Lisa gave in in an instant as she reached for her cardholder.

TAGSLIST! @yxlis @jisooftme @geeminz @lisas-earlobe @badaspookie @xszn @badasgff @hwm1hyun @herwhcre @lilacura @naycore / taglist is open

masterlist

[actual-changeling]

i think about the fact that crowley went through with his confession despite everything at least once a day, so have a ficlet where he doesn't.

edit: you can now find this fic on ao3 right here

———

"If I'm in charge… I can make a difference."

For a second, everything stops. The noise disappears, the world blurs and fades, his body grows numb while he desperately clings to the breath inside his lungs. He is suffocating, he must be, words are blocking his throat, and this—this can't be.

After everything they went through for six thousand years, after countless of heaven's cruelties, after ropeburn on Aziraphale's wrists before stepping into a spiral of hellfire, the mere thought of his angel returning to heaven seemed like a laughable impossibility. There are choices the world makes for one, and this had been one of them; live as a traitor, as an exile, but live. 

A life lived in freedom, shared, and cherished.

Aziraphale wouldn't go back. He wouldn't. 

Crowley could have sworn he never would, and yet here they are, mouths open, judgements spoken, and still alive. 

"Oh."

Air rushes out of him and takes the tension with it, dragging him back to full consciousness and leaving him with tremors in his hands and tears in his eyes.

"Right."

Reflexively, he turns around, hyperaware of his uncovered eyes, and the confession is still humming in the back of his mind. He wouldn't, he thinks again and again and again, he wouldn't, he wouldn't.

But he did. The grandfather clock stares him down, a hint of gold reflected back at him, and his joints ache when he pries his glasses out of his fist and puts them on. A familiar shadow falls over the world, taking all the colour with it, and Crowley suddenly feels very, very cold.

"Crowley?"

A hesitant step towards him, then another, and his skin burns, his fingers shake, as the carefully cultivated sprout of hope in his chest dies oh so slowly.

He wouldn't, whispers the voice again, crumbling like a brittle leaf crushed in Aziraphale's fist.

He would. He did, another gives back, and he knows this, too, knows it with the taste of resignation on his tongue.

Crowley faces Aziraphale simply to stop him from coming any closer, gritting his teeth when he sees the confused irritation greeting him. Surprised—Aziraphale is surprised that he does not want to come with him.

Six thousand years, the tiny voice weakly offers, six thousand years, and this is the reward.

Crowley wants to rip his confession out of his throat and offer it to him, he wants to throw it up onto the floor and never see it again, he wants to grab Aziraphale's shoulders and shake him because, why, why would you think I want this? Why would you do this?

Why are you leaving me?

He wants to break his ribs and pull them apart so he can kill his heart with his own hand, and it is falling, it is burning, it is grace leaving him as everything he thought he knew dissipated and vanished among the stars. Maybe some pieces of himself will stay behind in the dust, marking his presence, marking an absence.

"Good luck," Crowley says flatly, not recognising himself, not seeing or hearing, and as he begins to walk away, a high-pitched ringing settles in his ears. Love is a stone sinking to the bottom of his stomach, it is his ribs splintered and sharp, cutting him open from the inside out. Maybe the worst part is that it is not entirely unexpected—after all, why would he keep telling himself that Aziraphale would never return to heaven if there were no fundamental belief that he would?

"Good luck? Crowley! Crowley, come back, to—"

A hand wraps around his wrist like heated iron, and he can barely bite back the strangled sound escaping him at the contact, wrenching his arm out of Aziraphale's grip; he doesn't turn around.

"Don't."

Not a command, no, a plea, a prayer, a finish line, the ending to a game he always hated playing; love, sure, in the good moments, during the good times.

Now it simply hurts—hollow and heavy—and if he looks at him, he will tell him; he will tell him all of it and more. He will try to make him change his mind despite knowing it is hopeless, yet he cannot help but feel as if this is a frozen moment right before the guillotine blade falls.

Judgement day, for better or for worse.

Crowley could linger, could meet tear-stained cheeks and blue irises, could fall to his knees and beg him to stay, but none of it would be able to fix the rift opening between them. Six thousand years, and for the very first time since Eden, Aziraphale is a stranger to him. The blade will have to come down eventually, and maybe they have been staving off the inevitable; maybe it is for the best.

Squeezing his eyes shut, Crowley gathers the fragmented shards of himself and holds them tight. Then he makes a choice and whispers a goodbye into the silence, numbly making his way through the bookshop, across the street, into the Bentley, and all the way back to his flat.

Sometimes things are better left unsaid.