#in terms of sizing

[pocket-dragon]

why don't they just put the meat down 😬?

[saywhat-politics]

Reportedly, Trump wants this photo removed from the Internet. Please share.

[carlyraejepsans]

sans undertale would not make i fucked your wife jokes. people want to make jokes about sans fucking asgore's wife but sans the character would NOT do that r you kidding me. you can cut the secondhand embarrassment with a knife every time they're in the same room together, sans likes the guy, i bet he feels genuinely kinda bad for asgore. he'd be like sorry about the dating your ex wife thing. to be fair she's a really cool ex wife. and asgore would be like (rescue shelter dog sigh) She is.

[asterwild]

behold: bears

[professorfcknmoriarty]

Presented without context.

[lxvvie]

How do y’all feel about loser!simon x loser!reader? Like, life is just lifing, eating you up and spitting you out in different ways. You’re just taking shit day by day, you hate your job, you hate your boss, you hate your one coworker who can never mind their own business as if it’s not an open secret that they’re fucking y’all’s VERY MARRIED coworker. You may or may not be in serious need of some dicking down and you’re desperate as a result (god knows how many fucking assholes you’ve entertained). You’re not getting paid enough to deal with the shit you deal with daily but you grin and bear it with gritted teeth.

Then there’s Simon, an equal opportunity hater with too many issues to count and not enough paper (and fucks to give) to list them. The job is jobbing, his apprentice ain’t worth shit, he's questioning some life choices (like this last fucking tattoo he got and sleeping with the bird a couple shops down because she… yeah, let’s just say horniness is a helluva drug), and the less said about his pity wanks, the better.

If Shit Happens were people, it’d be you two. Just clown shit, asshattery, good sex, shitty conversation, stupid arguments, and even shittier alcohol. Real Horny Loser Shit. 🤡

But for what it’s worth, it fucking works for you two. Y’all can be horny ass losers and equal opportunity haters together.

[numberonetribble]

Looney Tunes Back in Action (2003) reference in this economy? more likely than you think

Bonus:

[conkreetmonkey]

The guitar riff at the end of the Homestuck version of Megalovania is actually Vriska’s leitmotif because it plays during the part where she’s onscreen, and since learning that I’ve noticed that a LOT of remixes that thematically have nothing to do with HS will add it back in, probably not knowing this, unintentionally referencing Vriska Housetrapped from Domicileimprisoned in their Deltarune or Smash Bros remixes.

[4bsurdcreature]

Narrative Foils

Based off of This Post

[handmade-oldschool-lolita]

The young child's JSK is handmade!

Made to match the OP's 2003 Ribbon Bouquet set by BTSSB.

OP's blog can be found here.

[despazito]

>breed population has low diversity with most individuals as genetically close as siblings

> breed health issue identified

> fund research to isolate responsible gene(s) for the disease

> remove affected dogs and carriers from gene pool

> remove aesthetically unfavorable dogs from gene pool

> only let small percentile of animals reproduce

>let favourite sires reproduce a lot

> inbreeding line goes up

> breed health issue identified

> fund research to isolate responsible gene(s) for the disease

> remove affected dogs and carriers from gene pool

> remove aesthetically unfavorable dogs from gene pool

> only let small percentile of animals reproduce

>let favourite sires reproduce a lot

> inbreeding line goe-

[kacievvbbbb]

My most maybe controversial take on the live action situation is that if at this point you are still actively watching and going “hey guys this wasn’t that bad” at these live action movies you are not a real animation fans you are a fan of the OG movies despite them being animated. It’s just a blatant lack of acknowledging how the fact that these movies where animated shaped them

Because at this point it’s literally impossible to ignore the actual harm these “live action” movies are doing to animation.

[obsxdiannn]

To all those TSS fan artists who draw Janus with a long skirt/dress and hair like he’s some kind of scaly, gothic Mary Poppins, I’d just like to say thank you for doing the lord’s work.

[wisted-twonderland]

long-term planning

pt 2

[lxvvie]

One Night (I Can't) Stand.

loser!simon x loser!reader

You smelled smoke. Right after the direct sunlight bitch-slapped you awake.

You’d glare if you had the energy, but it was the sun and you were tired. Too tired. Too tired physically, and it wasn’t the type of exhaustion that came from being at work all day with your asshole boss and inept coworkers, oh no, this was… this was that ‘feel good’ tired, the one that came from a lot of—oh!

Oh.

You moved and… you were sore. In all the right places, too. Your body felt heavy and a little like Jello. You took a peek under the covers. Butt ass naked. Ohhh. So you did get some after all. Finally. Look at you, getting dicked down like normal people. After a bar crawl you were practically dragged to under the guise of “team building”. You cackled like some fuckin’ goofball, like you were in on some inside joke only you and the universe knew, and then you felt the bed shift a little next to you, heard a soft exhale, smelled some more smoke, and…

…Wait a minute. Who’d you fuck?

You were almost scared to turn over. The last time something like this happened, you shat where you ate. By proxy. It was one of your co-worker’s friends, some guy named… Jack? Joshua? Whoever the fuck. Anyway, the sex was… mediocre at best, you don’t even remember if you came or not (like who could forget an orgasm?), and afterward, you had to contend with said co-worker’s knowing smile every time you saw her. And then the poor guy asked you out (at her encouragement). Oh, you still cringe at the fallout from that.

Anyway… who’d you fuck again?

You took a deep breath, counted down from five, prepared yourself for the possibility of it being another shit-show, and then—

“The fuck was so funny?” Well, that eliminated… all of your co-workers. Deep voice. Nice, deep voice. Nice, deep, gravelly voice. Big dick energy voice. You think. The stuff fanfiction and bad boy fantasies are made of. Okay, you’ll hold that next cackle in. You turned over to face your bedmate and was immediately greeted to the sight of a pair of big brown eyes staring into your soul. Or, rather, staring through your soul. Same difference. You just know that he’s big. Huge. Physically imposing. Broad-shouldered. Muscular but not, what is it, incredibly defined? You can see the power in his body, and it was something to watch as he rubbed the back of his neck absentmindedly. Muscles under tan-lined skin. Angular, long face. A nose that was broken one time too many. Long eyelashes. Furrowed brows. Five o’clock shadow. Resting bitch face. Buzzcut that was growing out. He was cute in a grungy “fuck you and fuck them, too” kind of way. Mismatched features that matched him and made sense.

Shitty tattoos, though. Mm. A travesty.

So now you’re face-to-face with your bedmate who, from the looks of it, had been up longer than you, had also been watching you if his sitting up against the pillow was any indication, and was nursing one of cheapest cigarette brands known to man (shoutout to your chain-smoking HR rep for getting you hip to this information against your will while at job orientation), and… uh…

“…Who the fuck are you?” Smooth. Real smooth, blurting that shit out. Fuck your foot-in-mouth syndrome. It’s done you more harm than good.

Didn’t really faze the guy much, if any, though. He just quirked a brow. Took another hit from his cigarette. Flicked the ashes into the makeshift ashtray of a cracked shot glass. Exhaled and let the smoke settle over you two. Came back to staring into (or is it through?) your soul. Okay… this is awkward. Well, it was until—

“Who the fuck are you?” came the brusque response. You were taken aback. Don’t know why because you didn’t know the guy from a can of paint, but you were, and if he caught the shadow that passed over your face, he didn’t say anything. The high you had earlier from FINALLY getting some dick came crashing down stupendously upon this asshole’s broad shoulders.

You hate your co-workers and boss all over again.

And you hate that HR rep even more.

[ariadne-mouse]

@outquisitor I hope you're pleased with yourself. I know I am.