#incorrect shadow and bone quotes

[thesuntomyshadows]

Y/N: Anyone else have the weird urge to lecture themselves?

Y/N, mimicking Kaz: Y/N, what are you doing?

Kaz: *Walking up behind Y/N* Y/N, what are you doing?

Y/N: I conjured him.

[janaklin]

Jesper: Aren’t you going to say, I told you so?

Kaz: What would be the point in that?

Jesper: Oh, so you’re saying that you’re going to hang on to this and throw it at me at some future, more personally beneficial moment?

Kaz: I don’t see the point in wasting it now, do you?

[iolesbookshelf]

(This might have been done before but I just saw these text posts with Nancy and Steve from ST and I just had to make this)

[you-must-be-mr-bogg1ns]

Jesper: Dad, this is my boyfriend, Wylan.

Colm: You could do better.

Jesper: But I love hi-

Colm: I'm not talking to you.

[justszanna112]

Everyone keeps talking abt Kaz being so romantic with the 'I would come for you' or the 'I want you' lines, while he was lowkey a funny bitch towards inej. Like she said 'saints are always with us, Kaz.' and he replied with: 'WELL, NOT WHEN YOU GOT KIDNAPPED' I was laughing my ass off. This man thinks in fuckin poetry, but when he opens his mouth, he says the meanest, most heartbreaking shit ever.

[aprill-99]

Kaz: “Of course I don’t play favorites among the Dregs.”

Kaz: “I value all the not-Inej’s equally.”

[undercover-grisha]

Kaz: “Alright, it’s come to my attention that your teachers don’t teach you about how the banking system works yet. A clear flaw in the Ketterdam education system, but luckily you have me as a father and I can teach you how banks work better than they could anyways.”

Aashvi Ghafa (5 year old):

Jordan Ghafa (8 year old):

Kaz: “Now, you’re going to come up to me and convince me to loan you this money.”

Aashvi: “Hello, Baba! Can I have the money?”

Kaz: “And why do you need it today, young miss?”

Aashvi: “Because I’m adorable.”

Kaz: “Fair point. Bad reason. Denied.”

Aashvi: “Because I’m very sick.”

Kaz: “Do you have your extended medical history, and a medik, and your prescriptions, and your insurance provider with you? No? Denied.”

Aashvi: “That’s not fair.”

Kaz: “Exactly.”

Jordan: “I’ll pay for her.”

Kaz: “You don’t have any money.”

Jordan: “Yes I do. I just took it from that table while Aashvi was talking to you.”

Kaz:

Kaz: “I am. So. Proud of you.”

[ilivebyshipping]

Teenage wesper kid: I need to get so wasted I'll forget all my life problems.

Jesper: we have vodka.

Wylan: JESPER LLEWELLYN FAHEY! You can't just offer vodka to our child! He wouldn't like the taste. Don't worry, honey, we have some gin.

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Nina: mmmm this cake is amazing

Wylan: oh my god, get a room

Nina: I would get a room with this cake. I think I could show this cake a good time

Jesper: If you had to what would you give up, food or sex?

Nina, immediately: Sex

Matthias: Seriously, answer faster

Nina: Oh I’m sorry, honey, when he said sex I wasn’t thinking about sex with you

Matthias: … It’s like giant hug

Wylan: Jes what about you, which would you give up: sex or food?

Jesper: Food

Wylan: Okay, how about sex or your guns?

Jesper: *look of pure horror*

Jesper: Oh my god, it’s like Sophie’s Choice

[marvinthecrow]

That's what happened, right?

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[thesuntomyshadows]

Y/N: I like how we say 'Oh man' to express our disappointment. Because men are in fact disappointing.

Inej: *Sighs and turns to Kaz* What did you do this time?

[janaklin]

Jesper: Why are you in such a good mood today, Wylan?

Wylan: It’s just such a beautiful day.

Inej: He set Kuwei on fire.

[variousfandomthoughts]

Wylan: And thus, by slowly taking larger and larger amounts of these small doses, our bodies will become used to the poisons, eventually making us immune to even lethal amounts.

Jesper: I thought we were just doing drugs together.

[you-must-be-mr-bogg1ns]

Jesper: I'm 80% water 20% waffles and 100% sexy

Matthias: That's 200%

Jesper: I'm twice the man you'll ever be

[lilisouless]

Kaz: You have gone too far. You took the crow club, you have destroyed it’s spirit, you have taken it from me. All that I could forgive. But, Rollins…

Pekka Rollins: What?

Kaz: “scoffs” moss green?

Pekka: GET OUT OF MY CLUB!

[aprill-99]

Character A: “The real tragedy was the friends we made along the way.”

Character B: “Don’t you mean ‘treasure’?”

Character A: “No. Having to care about other people has been a real bummer for me and my personal goals.”