#make it extremely difficult to learn any art type skills

[3liza]

this is such a dumb post im about to make but im trying to watch Ryan Murphy take a run at Hannibal and doing it mostly incoherently (a show called Grotesquerie) like he does everything but it reminded me that the trope in both crime media AND real life criminal forensics is that assumption that for a killer to do something a certain way, he has to be or is more likely to be a professional in that field. the old chestnut that jack the ripper or whoever must be a surgeon or a mortuary worker or a butcher in order to "know anatomy" is complete nonsense. i know how to do so many things that have nothing to do with my actual job or training, including butchering meat, and cutting up a dead body takes like. less than "deboned a chicken five or six times" levels of expertise.

its really not some rarified skill and its pretty self-explanatory as soon as you start separating joints etc. i imagine it only takes a couple minutes of trying to saw through a human femur with garden tools before you start looking around for a better way and then figure out on your own that separating cartilage is a lot easier. which is why there are so many actual irl cases where entire human corpses have been dismembered in a fairly short period of time in order to fit them into luggage or trash cans or barrels, and the killer was just some guy. you dont need any expertise when cutting up OR sewing together parts of a carcass because surgical expertise is about doing as little damage as possible and maximizing survival, which doesn't apply to doing morbid tableaux with people who are already dead, or concealing a victim in a crawlspace or what have you. its an incredibly dumb thing that people say both on tv and in real life and its so annoying. this applies to really any forensic claim about expertise with the exception of skills that actually do take many years to get even vaguely competent at, like idk, drawing realistically. like if you are the fictional detective and you found a blood painting with excellent draftsmanship at a crime scene, that would probably be forensically relevant because not a lot of people know how to draw and its not something you can get GOOD at without a few hundred hours of investment. but just cutting up meat and sewing it back together? and not even taxidermy or tanning or skeleton articulation or clean maceration or whatever???? not relevant. tired of seeing it in crime media. its dumb. actually being able to set up a department store window scene with 200lb human bodies without them falling over or liquifying or collapsing takes a lot more specialized experience than slicing and dicing. like if i walked into a church with a bunch of dead people arranged as the last supper i would be looking for someone with a theater tech degree, not a surgeon

[tchiyya]

Hello and welcome, שלום וברוכים הבאים, привет и добро пожаловать!

Welcome all friends, new and old. If you're migrating here with me from my old blog, please be aware that while I am still fundamentally the same underlying person, I have recently (as of this writing, at the start of this blog) gone through some extremely major and difficult personal things that have changed me a lot. I am, in fact, having to rebuild my life from the ground up, and am hoping for a fresh start. I would ask that folks please be respectful of that process and accept the changes as they come. Or, alternatively, if it's no longer your jam, please feel free unfollow with no hard feelings had.

***Important: if you know or think you know me IRL and we haven't had a conversation where I've said it's okay for you to follow this new blog, please respect my privacy and don't follow or read this blog. Thank you for respecting this boundary!

Things you will find here:

Religious Judaism

Jewish culture, history, and identity

Comparative theology

Queer/trans/non-binary stuff

Inclusive feminism/queer liberation/trans unity/inclusionism

Some politics and current events

Musings, thoughts, fancies, things I am thinking through

Personal posts

Hobbies (fiber arts of various types, learning woodworking, cooking/baking, possibly gardening, etc.)

Language learning: עברית, Русский (I am in the early stages of learning both; I have years of עברית practice and formal study but no ulpan, so my conversational skills are limited; Русский is something I have just started in earnest informally in the last few months or so, but I live with a native speaker which is why I'm learning it. Feel free to give me practice by reaching out to me in either!)

Other languages that I would love to learn at least a little of if I have the capability: ASL, Yiddish, Spanish, Arabic, Ukrainian

#ADHD Life

Cats, moths, bats, and other good creatures

Silliness

Boundaries: [Because DNIs don't work and people really need to relearn how to use the block button and curate their dashboards]

These are behaviors that will likely earn you a block from me:

Obvious scamming or spamming

Trolling

Lashon hara or call-out posts

Bigotry (not mistakes; actual beliefs)

Refusal to live in a fact-based reality (that is, if you refuse to take in new information and are unwilling to revise your opinions based on additional or improved information, I don't particularly want to engage with you)

Bitter in-fighting discourse that helps no one but our enemies

Exclusionism

Identity politics where one's identity defines the merit of your argument rather than merely informs it

Purity politics where "accountability" is actually just indefinite public shaming and shunning rather than teshuva and the possibility of forgiveness (which creates a culture where people are so terrified to ever make a mistake that they will always double down and refuse to admit to having made a mistake or having spoken in ignorance even when they very obviously have.) When is the last time you admitted you were wrong? Sincerely apologized for hurting others and worked to correct it as best as possible? Accepted someone else's teshuva and forgiven them fully?

Politics based more on jerking off to a specific theory than on compassion for actual living people and on effective (evidence-based) problem-solving

Honestly any behaviors that stress me out too much to be worth dealing with on an unserious social media platform

The older I get, the more I value people who are kind, compassionate, forgiving, and willing to work on themselves. And, the less I want to do with people whose politics and beliefs would seem to indicate that they are but whose actions show them to be unkind, unforgiving, and unwilling to look inward. Too many people have decided that cruelty is praxis as long as it's directed at the "correct" people. But punishment doesn't teach and is not synonymous with accountability. Cruelty creates more problems than it solves and fails to recognize the spark of the Divine in every person. Worse, it usurps the role of Hashem, who is the only true Judge.

As a religious Jew, I have to believe that every person has the ability to repent and change themselves for the good as long as they are alive. Even in death, I have to believe that gehinnom is temporary and meant to wash clean our collective neshamot, which are pure.

These are my values and I do my best to live by them. At the same time, I'm human and I make a lot of mistakes. I get angry and frustrated and I lash out. Or I allow myself to succumb to despair instead of seeing the broken things in the world as opportunities Hashem has given me to help others and release the Divine sparks trapped within. I do not always speak as wisely and as kindly as I wish I had. My deepest regrets in life are the times when I failed to be kind as I could have been in hindsight. I am a flawed person and I make mistakes. But, I also do my best to admit and correct them.

Can you say the same?

About us:

We are collectively Tchiyya, a system made up of six persons:

Tzuriel: genderqueer adult, ze/zir

Tamar: adult femme lesbian, she/her

Tidhar: adult bi male, he/him

Tahara: adult femme, she/her

Tomer: young adult queer punk, he/him

Tchelet: young alter (11ish), ze/zir

More about each of us here [coming soon]

Unless you are trying to talk to a specific alter, you can just interact with us generally as Tchiyya (they/them); however, you are welcome to reach out to a specific alter if you like. (Please note though, that Tchelet is quite young and so we are very guarded about who gets to interact with zir and how, and it will be supervised.)

Additional biographical information here [coming soon]

Asks:

Asks are open but anon is off. All asks will be answered publicly or (at my discretion) deleted. If you want a private conversation, message me directly.

Friendly, genuine asks about anything are welcomed. Banter is encouraged; trolling will be ignored. I do enjoy positive social interactions, so please do feel free to reach out!

Positions:

I used to have a whole massive write-up of my strong opinions on the topics most important to me. I will not be doing that here, at least not now, possibly never. You're just going to have to read my opinions as they come up like every other disorganized personal blog on here lol.

[websitestargirl]

type of traditional arts and crafts i think my fav cod characters would do because im crazy and all i think about is sex, video games, and fine arts

ghost:

wheel throwing. getting good at it is extremely difficult but rewarding (even though i picked it up immediately; non-humble brag). its one of those things where you can just sit and do it for hours and hours and hours non stop with very little variation of what youre making. like yes you can make pot or bowl or plate but they process of creating is rhythm and requires focus. its hypnotic, watching it go round and round. sensory heaven. its like giving him a chew toy

price:

man idfk this man doesnt have a creative bone in his body. he should learn how to conduct a marching band or something. oh but- but- delia! music isnt Traditional Arts its Music SHUT THE FUCK UPP SHUT UP SHUT IP SHUT UP (arguing at the wall)

soap:

i think he needs to be shown how to use a printing press. i think he needs to be taught lithography. i think the process would its his brain with the etching and chemicals and crayon and the fucking 6000lb block of limestone. soap is more of a drawer than anything else, and lithography is so drawing based itd cater to his skill set. also printing in lithography is easy af and quick so i think hed have fun just doing it again and again and again and again and-

gaz:

i think gaz should make books. he should learn all of the folds and cuts and make accordion style books and learn japanese book binding and all the other ones (im not a bookmaker so i dont know but i look at books). sequencing, collection of materials, and assembly can be done at any range of speed depending on what’s being created. it’s a tactile skill that uses dexterity, strength in the hands, precision, and planning. idk what hed make but he should make books.

this is actually all i can think of

honorable mentions:

graves should do film because hed make campy marvel captain america shorts where hes basically just jerking himself off for 5 minutes but disguised as an indie american film about War and Hardship (what the hell, sure)

nikolai should learn to play the flute. also welding maybe. idfk anything about welding but i know people who make pretty cool things. maybe he can make tiny

omfg wait a second im so dumb

nikolai should learn jewelry slip casting cause then he could make little airplanes out of precious metals

okay thats all

[dandyshucks]

okay okay here we go - very messy off-the-cuff oc intro under the cut with some design sketches + doodles (IT'S KIND OF LONG):

random other doodle (another system member's self portrait i think? idk djfkdl) for the last pic there sorry fhdksl it was just a handy photo i had on hand that had almost the same dimensions for tumblrs cropping shenanigans (also that one emoji is there in the first pic bc i couldn't get that eye to cooperate fjkdkl)

anyhowdy uhhmm heres Theodor and Philby... Theodor uses he/she and Philby uses they/it and I'm literally just now realizing that they cover the main four bases wtf ... that was not intentional but it is funky and fun !! Theodor has a few nicknames like Teddy, Dory, Theo, etc, while Philby is is just Philby (their full name is Philbert but only their parents call them that LOL)

Theodor has a port wine stain birthmark on his left cheek ! and Philby potentially has rosacea but I'm still looking into that to make sure I'm not pulling any shitty moves if I'm going to have that be a part of their character. they (Philby) use mobility aids occasionally, generally just a cane, sometimes crutches, but they also have a wheelchair on hand for more difficult days.

Teddy is an interesting mix of very patient and loving while also sometimes cocky and impulsive, so he sometimes say things that are unintentionally hurtful or offensive (but is learning to apologize swiftly to help mend his mistakes). to people who don't know him well, he might come across as arrogant occasionally. he enjoys designing clothing items that Philby will often sew up for him, as well as experimenting with different coloured art mediums (pastels, paint, chalk, etc) and makeup (he is absolutely a skincare girlie fjfkdl). he comes from a family that's well-off (definitely upper class but not necessarily wealthy) so he's used to having money to throw around and doesn't quite fully grasp what it's like to be poor or working (or even middle) class, so there's some butting of heads there.

Philby comes from a working class family, not poor but definitely lower class lol. they have a fair amount of pride and can be kind of prickly, but they're extremely thoughtful and can be very kind and patient when they want to be. they're very practical and well-organized, and is integral to keeping things running smoothly in the household. they're very skilled with sewing and they also happen to be a good cartoonist! it takes a bit for them to warm up to new people, but they're usually just neutral and maybe a bit blunt with people they don't know well. if they dislike a person, they tend to have an attitude of "i don't want to waste any of my time on this person" and avoids the person rather than taking the time and energy to decide if they want to be pointedly rude or remain polite.

both of them are really good with kids in their own way! Philby likes being fun and clownish while Teddy prefers to be more of a comforting ... well... teddy bear sort of presence LOL. both of them are super patient w kids though, and they love to spend time helping out with kids when someone needs a babysitter! (why yes this is almost entirely just an excuse for me to think abt how they'd be so good with the kiddos in our system LMAO) if they ever ran a daycare or preschool together they'd be absolutely phenomenal at it, especially since they make up for what the other lacks in their approaches to interacting with children.

Theo prefers kitschy grandma-type aesthetics in both clothing and decor, while Philby enjoys a lot of bright colours and fun patterns that would fit more into "c.lowncore" and "k.idcore" aesthetics (with some occasional punk influences). Theo enjoys a lot of clothing that is maybe considered more feminine, while Philby just wears whatever is comfortable and brightly coloured, occasionally with some blacks to make the colours pop more!

they have a really interesting contrasting dynamic, Theo being a "gentle giant" while also being somewhat impulsive and more prone to hurting people accidentally with his words, and Philby being smaller in stature and more prickly but also much more thoughtful and careful with their words and actions.

also bonus funny thing: Theodor had a trad g.oth phase as a teen in highschool that lasted a couple years hehe

[titaniumshortcake]

Sami's design was overdue for a little TLC. Also I wanted to play around with some funky lighting! :D Someday I might give my other nerds the same treatment, cuz I had a lot of fun experimenting and I feel like I better understand what effect I was going for now that this is done.

(despite all appearances I swear she's not just an anthro Dilophosaurus, she's part of a lizardy/snakey race I made up called the sephines and I gave her a Dilo's crests because I just can't help myself dhfjjhfjsd)

Please don't repost, trace, or use as a base.

Like what I do? I've updated my commission sheet! Come take a peek! <3

(Psst! Lil bit of character background under the cut for people who want it, cuz I don't think I've posted any recent Sami art or talked about how her story's unfolded here yet. :D)

Sami is the resident toxic alpha bitch among my roster. Her kind, the sephines, are monsters of myth by the design of her predecessors. In prehistoric times, they used to be some of the creatures that hunted other sapient races for food. As technology advanced and their prey developed the intelligence to fight back effectively, the sephines specialized in being ambush predators, staying out of sight and out of mind until they caught their prey alone. Some of them learned to shapeshift to spy on the other advanced races of the world, to stay one step ahead so that their clans aren't discovered when cities and villages expand. These other races, and thus the shapeshifters who infiltrate them, are looked down upon by the leaders of old, and if a sephine ever starts to think "hey maybe these people actually aren't that different from us", they get accused of turning traitor.

After Sami was exiled and left for dead for the crime of thinking for herself, she turned to my boy Nikayas and asked him to teach her to fight in ways her kind wouldn't expect. She learned what she needed from him to carve her path to power through her own family, and then she declared her intent to change things so that one day her children can walk down the streets of a city without causing mass panic and being hunted for their skins, and that turned her into a target for anyone she couldn't convince to see things her way. She started a half-century-long war between highly trained spies, essentially.

Sami's methods of negotiating alliances boil down to "explain myself once, give you one chance to agree". She's an extreme black-and-white, with-me-or-against-me type of thinker, and she's so used to expecting treachery that she will turn those claws on anyone she thinks has become a threat to her without hesitation. It makes her very effective at taking swathes of territory from her enemies, though substantially less skilled at courting the trust of anyone who learns of her nature. Instead she relies on infiltration and manipulation, and positioning her agents in key positions such that she can cripple those who might threaten her kind.

Nobody's safe from her suspicion. Due to this and her own unwillingness to give ground in a confrontation, she's the one who turns on and blinds Nikayas in his left eye, thinking she's simply taking the chance to strike before he does. This same fight is the one that ultimately costs her her life.

Even long after she's gone, Sami's influence on the lives that she touched is difficult to shake. Over the course of her very long life, she mothered and trained dozens of children who still pursue her goals elsewhere, and may one day reclaim the territory that she patrolled in life.

[feathery-dreamer]

"you artists just don't like that the average person can make artistic pieces!" literally anybody can make artistic pieces without AI or other generative program. just because they don't look/sound very precisely the way you imagine them, doesn't make them less artistic.

just grab a pencil and paper to doodle, maybe crayons/markers/paint to color them or make the picture directly in color. or keep a notebook and pen on you to scribble stupid story concepts and dialogues. or take your phone/tablet to type it in a text file, record yourself humming a made-up tune. or get you a bunch of material, any material, to shape into various parts so you can assemble them (this includes cooking/baking).

not everyone can make a masterpiece-level production, and that's okay because the same applies to any task - cleaning dishes, using a computer, having a job interview, hosting a radio show, making candy, sewing... something you view as a "basic" skill will be very difficult, sometimes even impossible, to some others due to psychological or cognitive or motor impairment, or simply not having learned it. does that mean experienced painters and cooks and sculptors and show hosts are privileged, hoarding all the world's skill and "gatekeeping" their skill domains?

if you spend some time on it, you may just find out you had the potential this whole time so you can develop your own ability. your pieces will be more valuable because they're made with parts of you (brush strokes, language, other mannerisms). sure they aren't extremely hyperrealistic in appearance/sound/shape/texture/etc, but if anything, "imperfect" art is more appreciated. if you take the easy way of using AI to generate "art" and never bother beyond, all of "your" media will be empty shells, with nothing from you as a person. it's entirely copied off of other people's works, you learn nothing from doing that

Ive been seeing more and more ai fan 'art' and I just want to say that I'd rather see your shitty photoshop skills and stick figure doodles than the lifeless dead eyed renderings of a forest killing machine that scalped millions of images from real artists. Ty.

[bloodweavefangnatic]

Lockrion Silvanus Woods

VA: TBA

<> Not my art. Found it on Pinterest

Sex: Female

Class: Asmodeus Tiefling, Half-Elf

<> Subclass: Wizard - Necromancy

Age: TBD

Identity: Transgender

Nationality:

* African-American (mum)

* English; RP (dad) 🇬🇧

Residency:

Emerald Grove

Likes:

* Sorcery - embracing the power of the Weave

<> Learning new spells

* Spending time with her mother

* Books

* Moving around

* Criminality

* Mischief

Dislikes:

* The idea of feeding on a living thing (person or animal)

* Her mother (or her adoptive father) being right

* Being caught red-handed

* Reprimanded

* Vampirism

<> Showing her teeth/fangs

Flaws:

* Kleptomania

* Cheater

<> Not the type to “settle down”

* Quick-tempered

* Picky

* Hospitals

* Vasovagal syncope

« Basically faints at the sight of blood 😂

(which kinda makes feeding extremely difficult)

Strengths:

* Theft & lockpicking

* Spell-casting

<> Wild Shape is her favourite spell 🤭

* Moral compass

* Literacy (environmental)

* Plating poker

* Manipulation

Family:

Mother: Tav

(bio) Father: Astarion (ascended)

(surrogate) father: Gale

Clan name:

* Woods (mother's maiden name before remarrying)

* Dekarios (trump card)

Proficiencies:

Strength 8

Constitution 11

Dexterity 16

Intelligence 17

Wisdom 20

Charisma 19

Appearance & Personality:

Lockrion has a red scaly body with horns jutting out of her head (as any Tiefling does) but the difference is the colour of her skin is a very pale white and has bloodshot eyes, along with some very pointy ears that are decorated with piercings. The colour of her hair is a bluish/purplish colour filled with dreads; like her mother

Distinguishing markings:

TBA

Young:

At a young age Lockrion was very skilled at playing music with any instrument and was in her happiest element before everything started to go downhill with her mother being a victim of domestic abuse

How would you describe Lockrion's personality?

* Self-righteous

* Maturity (for a kid)

* Bookworm

* Astute

* Educated

* Comedic

[blazehedgehog]

What is the oldest sonic hack that you feel stands up to the level design standards of the present sonic fangaming/hacking community

I specifically avoided most Sonic rom hacks for a long long time. Actually, scratch that: I avoided most rom hacks period.

This is going to be an extremely controversial statement but a lot of rom hacks don't have very good level design. Or they didn't, at any rate. There is a point where things changed, for sure.

But back in the day, having enough skill and talent to make a rom hack was like, the complete opposite brain required to make a fun and balanced game. It's kind of an art vs. technical thing. People who made hacks were coming at it from a more mechanical perspective. This is sort of why the term "Kaizo" came to represent a certain type of ultra-difficult rom hack.

When you love a game SO MUCH that you're willing to reverse-engineer it and build your own expansion for it, generally you're the type of person who has mastered the game several times over. This skews your basic level understanding of what "normal" difficulty is, and in a lot of cases, these people aren't even making something representative of "normal" difficulty.

So you get levels that are super unbalanced, where it's easy to get lost, and maybe they require you to do advanced tricks that the average player has never even thought about. For them, the one who made the hack, it's second nature. They dance through their own levels, totally untouched, because they know where all the enemies are, where all the health is, and so on. They built the lock and the key.

I've had plenty of arguments with people over the years, hack developers specifically, about this topic. I've argued until I was blue in the face, but it doesn't matter, because there will always be that one person who thinks they know better. "It's fine, I learned how to do it, they just have to learn how to do it, too."

And it's just never that simple. Never, ever, ever.

Because you are a unique person. Nobody is exactly like you. The way you learned to do a thing represents less than 1% of people who will ever play your game. Maybe you learned your tricks by watching Youtube videos, or live streams, or reading guides. Not everybody is going to be that dedicated or have that much time and energy.

"You must train for 600 hours before you're ready to try my hack" is not a badge of honor worthy of anything in and of itself. The journey and the destination you've created after the journey is complete are separate ideas.

Go look up achievement statistics to see just how few people even make it past the first boss of most games, let alone halfway, or even to the credits. You very quickly start hitting figures like "only 30% of players did this super easy thing." For a big name, big budget, massively popular, professionally balanced retail game.

And that in itself is only for a fraction of the types of people who make rom hacks. Some just have more to learn and aren't very good at level or game design yet. And there are plenty of hacks out there that suffer from the opposite problem as "Kaizo", where they're just bland and forgettable. It's a difficult balancing act to get right.

These are truths in Doom wads, Mario Maker levels, Sonic rom hacks, the works. So the number of rom hacks I've played that get it right can probably be counted on one hand.

Some of that is because so few hacks get it right, and some of that is because I keep my distance from the hacking scene for that very reason. So if you're like, "wow, I can't believe BlazeHedgehog dunked on that really good hack like that" -- maybe I haven't played it! I used to throw myself to the wolves on all kinds of things where the balance and polish is more frustrating than anything, and it's made me gun shy.

The first Sonic romhack I remember feeling good about was something called "Sonic 1 Pixel Perfect." I really liked its pastel colors and smart reuse of Ristar objects. You might look at the above screenshot with skepticism because it looks too normal, but that's sort of why I like it. It made smart, subtle changes (like the fact time of day slowly changes from dawn, noon, dusk, and night as you play through the zone) and the level design was very digestible. It's just a shame it never got very far.

I seem to recall some of the people who worked on Pixel Perfect went on to make Sonic 2 Retro Remix, which I... think I played? And I might have even liked? But it's been a very, very, very long time.

[morlock-holmes]

@lynettethemadscientist

"I think the issue with AI art is less the “theft” aspect and more the laziness. I could use an AI program to help me write a niche fanfic. Or I could write it myself, which would require time and effort. It would require me to build skills and have dedication. These are all good things that I *should* be striving for, rather than taking the easy way out. Functionally, using AI programs for creative projects is the same as buying a Hostess cake instead of learning how to bake"

When you say "Write it myself" what do you mean? Type it into a computer? Type it on a typewriter? Write it all out by hand? How would you publish it, would you upload it to AO3? Carefully write the whole thing out in black letter caligraphy? Once you write the first copy would you use mechanical reproduction like a scanner and printer or would you only allow hand copies?

Mind, there's no "right" answer here.

I remember taking a comic book course at the local community college about 15 years ago and one of the students asked about using zip-a-tone.

You know how a bunch of manga uses grayscale:

source

When printed, each of those grays is actually a pattern of tiny dots, which are so small that they create the impression of a large block of gray.

Nowadays, and fifteen-years-ago-a-days, you could just scan your art, and use photoshop's fill tool to make those tones.

But prior to the invention of computer image editing software, artists would buy large sheets of what were essentially tape covered in tiny dots, use an xacto knife to cut them manually into the shape of the artwork, and physically paste them on top of their ink drawings.

One of the students wanted to do that instead of using photoshop, and the teacher went,

"Man, I can't stop you but I hated that stuff, it was awkward to use and stuck to the wrong things and all the little scrap bits would get everywhere. I remember I'd get in the shower and find pieces stuck to my pubes."

Artists are always reaching back. Why do CGI when I could photograph everything on 32mm film and use an optical printer to make the special effects.

Well, because it's really difficult and awkward, and that's your trade-off.

The thing about the ubiquity of computers is that they are draining the physicality out of the art production process. Zipatone, film cameras, pen and ink, caligraphy, gold leaf, sculpture, optical process shots, cutting film with a razor, shooting ink and paint drawings on an oxberry, these are radically different as physical processes; duplicating any of them on the computer consists mainly in using a mouse, a keyboard, and a wacom tablet.

This is not a trivial difference.

Probably Marshall McLuhan would have said something about it.

Text is exponentially easier to produce than imagery. While I was at work today I composed a little scene in my head:

"The strange girl puts her fingers to her lips and lets out a shrill whistle. Suddenly I see a speck in the sky, rapidly growing. It's traveling so fast I can barely make out what it might be.

I've only just had time to brace myself when it crashes into the street in front of me. It's huge, twenty or thirty feet tall, a kind of humanoid robot, or vehicle. It's feet appear to be made out of two monster trucks. Rather than a head, it has what looks to be a long gun, reminiscent of a tank or artillery piece. It has hands, but the fingers of the left one terminate in whirring drill bits, and the fingers of the right terminate in spinning buzzsaws. They make an ungodly racket as the hulking thing slowly steps out of the crater it made when it landed."

It took me about, oh, two minutes to write that description of my OC (It's a Warmain shard, if you play Nobilis) and I am extremely confident that this prose at least reaches the level of "workmanlike". It's good enough. Nobody is going to read it and then make fun of my stylistic choices on youtube. If you read it in a light novel you wouldn't stop and think about how amateurish it was.

Making a workmanlike drawing of the same scene would take me literally days, and I'm not sure that I could do it.

On the other hand, I typed this prompt into the Microsoft CoPilot thing that they put on my roommate's computer.

Hi, can you generate an image, shot from a low angle, of a giant robot standing in the middle of a city and towering over a human figure. The robot is green, has monster trucks for feet, and a tank turret instead of a head. The fingers on the left hand have drills on the end and the fingers on the right hand have buzzsaws on them.

After about 20 seconds it produced several images. Here's the best:

You will notice that it is wildly off from my prompt; of the eight images I generated this is the only one that put truck cabs on the feet. They are the wrong kind of trucks; they appear to be more like cargo trucks than monster trucks, but this guy has Vehicle Voltron/Dairugger feet, that's a non-negotiable detail.

Anyway, that aside, it is also workmanlike in a way that I would find extremely difficult to reproduce even after years spent bashing my head against visual art with little improvement.

One of the big questions is what happens when these tools begin to improve their responsiveness to prompting? Stablediffusion is less user-friendly and I'm much too tired to get it working properly, but it looks like it could come significantly closer to what I actually described, particularly with some inpainting work.

In the dada spirit I decided to make a prompt from looking at the next few posts on my dash and feeding excerpted phrases chosen at random into an AI image generating model...

And then doing it several more times because a certain word you will probably be able to guess swamped basically everything else in the prompt in a way that I found rather boring.

Here is the most successful image, in my opinion:

This, according to many people, is theft. I would challenge anybody to determine, simply from this image, first of all the exact wording of the prompt, and second of all, which visual artists I "stole" from.

Frankly, I find the idea that the above image inherently constitutes "theft", but that fanart and collage do not inherently constitute theft, just facially absurd.

Second, most of these software are artistically muddled; a semi-random string of words produces a homogenized product heavily weighted towards certain words. Certain parts of a prompt will tend to burn so bright that they blot out everything else about your prompt.

For science, and further demonstration of my point, the other images are below the cut.

[flickeringart]

Neptune aspecting Mercury and Venus

(Continuation of my post “Neptune aspecting the Sun and Moon”)

Mercury aspecting Neptune

Mercury is representative of deductive reasoning, of communication and learning, of exchange of information and social interaction. Mercury is essentially representative of the mental faculties, the ability to draw conclusions based on the gathering of information. Mercury represents the intellect, the most commonly applied tool for understanding and navigating the world around the self. It’s the tool that makes connections, that defines and discriminates. The intellect is a divisive mechanism that breaks things down and distinguishes every little part to discover its function and purpose within the whole.

Mercury aspecting Neptune often lends itself to a very creative mind and an ability to articulate and communicate nuances. It also seems to lend itself to a vivid imagination – an ability to paint a picture with words or portray an archetypal energy through mimicry and acting. The conjunction is the most intense of the aspects and the benefits as well as the debilitations are felt more acutely. While Mercury-Neptune has the ability to “enchant” with words and easily navigate the world of imagery and fairytales, the real world void of magic can be less easy to navigate. Taylor Swift has the conjunction and she’s a great example of someone who is a storyteller through songwriting. She essentially takes the interactions of her everyday life and turns it into magic – something that is universal and appeals to people world wide. Music has the ability to glamorize the most dull and ordinary and elevate it to new heights. There’s a might to music and it speaks to people on the feeling level. Music, movies and theater for that matter have the goal to affect people, to mirror their inner life and strike a note on some level of the psyche. Mercury-Neptune comes with the risk of being easily affected by words and a tendency to read into things more than necessary. Sometimes the meaning of another person’s words can be distorted and made to fit the person’s own preferred narrative. This is a huge problem, especially for the conjunction - sometimes words that actually carry weight can be made out to mean anything. Furthermore, in overlooking the concrete – that which is spelled out loud and clear, there door is wide open to make mistakes and blunders when tending to details, and in real life this can have dire consequences. Reading too much into things or not reading enough into things seems to be the problem. Neptune refines whatever planet it touches and this can make for a real ability to work with subtleties, but the more subtle something is, the less dense and concrete it is. The more sensitive the instrument, the more susceptible it is to suggestion and manipulation. Fantasy and imagination is inextricably merged with the intellect with this aspect.

The trine and the sextile aspects from Neptune to Mercury similarly lends themselves to a feeling for subtlety when communicating and thinking. The trine is more of a natural modus operandi while the sextile is more of a skill that can be used and activated through conscious cooperation. Mercury-Neptune can potentially cause a propensity for lying, not because of a need for a control but because of a natural tendency to distort information. This is as true for the conjunction as the trine, while the sextile might take some deliberation. The tendency to convey information in the most romanticized and creative fashion might border on lying because it leaves people with no grasp of the cold and hard facts. Mercury-Neptune is not good with the plain, cut and dry message transferring – these people thinks in images and imbue everything they convey with a touch of story-telling.

The square from Neptune to Mercury, seems to make the native very serious in creative pursuits. There’s effort and strain that is required because of conflict felt between the intellect and the vault of dreams and fantasy. Usually, the native displays criticism of their work and is skeptically inclined toward their own influence or the value of their own artistic pursuits. Amy Winehouse had the square in her chart and she was quite hard on herself although the public loved her. Even in people who aren’t pursuing an artistic path, the Mercury –Neptune square will cause the person to undervalue any talents and dreams that they have, yet be pressed to develop and fulfill them. David Bowie is also a great example of this type of person – on the one hand there’s nebulousness and chaotic creativity, on the one hand there’s analyzing and mental discernment that is unforgiving. Donald Trump also has the square, quite the business man, yet he’s not someone who is able to stick to the purely factual– he manufactures his own story, his own narrative that people, to a large extent, wants to buy. He speaks to the masses and moves them emotionally, some say he’s profoundly stupid, some says his wits are underestimated. This is typical of the square, there’s tension between the two planets and one cannot take credit for both ends. Either one sacrifices Mercury and looks mad and deranged, or one sacrifices Neptune and appears overly critical and rational – even cold and unfeeling.

The opposition aspect is in turn linked to extremism – the native must try to balance intellectual discernment with emotional receptivity. Too much of one thing will be to the detriment of the other. While the square produces conflict and tension, the opposition can give the ability to abandon one planet in favor of the other. Yoko Ono has this aspect and she has obviously been a big advocate of peace and love (Neptune), sometimes to the detriment of rhyme and reason. She has suggested that “direct communication” is the only way to true communication, but of course, this is only possible in the womb, if even then. The great gift of the opposition is the ability to abandon reason, to experience everything and hold onto nothing, to not label and impose judgment. However, it’s not difficult to see the consequences for this sacrifice.

(Buy products with my art)

Venus aspecting Neptune

Venus is representative of love and beauty, of femininity and sociability. The planet is linked to that which is of value, worthy of display and admiration. It also has something to do with preferences, style and talent. Venus is the one attracting Mars, that instigates desire, that draws him in. That which instigates our desire is powerful because it dictates action. Venus has a lot to do with money because it’s a marker and a measure of value – and people want to have as much as possible of it in order to be comfortable and socially desirable. Venus also has to do with partnership and marriage, and in order to catch someone’s eye, one has to be beautiful and appealing.

Neptune conjunct Venus is truly the height of love. While Venus is more personal and more social in nature, Neptune is the collective urge for redemption, the pull to touch something sacred. Neptune in us wants it all, the magic of enchantment that belongs to fairytales. Ordinary human love, which is more about feeling esteemed within a social context and desired for specific qualities, is not cutting it. With these planets conjunct, the person craves the total submerging with the one and only beloved in one’s heart and in other people’s hearts. Neptunian love is based on the mutual longing for something eternally blissful, the garden of Eden, the ultimate escape. This longing exist in all human beings to a larger or lesser extent, but it certainly unifies us and in some ways confirm our basic vulnerability and need for redemption. When Neptune and Venus are conjunct it would seem as if the person is very compassionate and understanding of people’s hearts. No doubt one can be very soothing and able to see the beloved one in all people one meets, which can be wonderful but also overwhelming and exhausting. The person is certainly capable of being accepting of all people, even to the point of allowing things that shouldn’t be allowed. Disillusionment can dawn brutally on these types since they have strong investment in the pure and untainted love that can only be kept alive in fantasy. These planets aspecting each other is a setup for being in love with love. Love for these types might not be about a specific person, they might seek out someone for their ability to mirror them. In other words, it would be difficult to love a person for their individuality because one would seek out someone with enough receptivity and mutability in order to find something of oneself in the other. Of course, this seems to be the nature of love despite Venus aspecting Neptune or not. We only ever fall in love with ourselves, although we’re unconscious of the fact. The only reason we’re ever drawn to someone is because we see something of ourselves in them. For people with Venus-Neptune contacts this phenomenon is taken to new heights. Liking and being fond of something yet knowing that that person or thing is different from oneself is entirely different from feeling a sense of union and yearning that is the oceanic deity calling a person home. With Neptune, the love object is the answer to all prayers and the remedy for all one’s troubles and pains. This is of course never quite true and the disappointment that follows upon the clearing of the intoxicating mist can be very scary and deeply depressing. Personal love, marriage and commitment might be idealized to the point of absurdity.

The trine and the sextile aspects are less intense compared to the conjunction, but they similarly denote a refined taste and a appreciation of artistry and music – anything that touches people’s souls inexplicably and profoundly. Typically, all Venus-Neptune aspects indicate a need to be loved unconditionally and to love unconditionally. Both of these harmonious aspects denote a very compassionate nature and a tendency to idealize and glamourize love. One is naturally very generous with one’s outpouring of affection, even when one’s own heart is broken. The trine indicates that the person is innately and naturally mirroring other people’s beauty. Escapism and distortion of reality is one’s way of being, it is not an acquired skill but rather something that’s a given. It’s probably easy to over-indulge in pleasure in order to escape the dreary everyday existence. In fact, when things get too hard, this is exactly what this type is likely to do. The sextile is more of a skill that is available for use. In other words, one is able to stimulate a bit of Neptune’s magic and universality in one’s style of expressing love – adding a bit of glamour, unattainability and fantasy in the mix. Conscious cooperation is required though, it’s not as if the sextile is going to cause over-indulgence as soon as one lets go of inhibitions.

The square aspect typically brings doubt and friction, when Neptune and Venus are involved, the conflict is between one’s personal value(s) and the recognition of oneness. Usually, the ugly side of Neptune comes out more readily. One wants to attain something special and magical but since one is not attuned enough or certain of one’s own preferences and values neither planet gets fulfilled or satisfied. Kim Kardashian has this square and she is never quite satisfied with her appearance (Venus), which is why she spends to much time perfecting it. She wants so badly to embody the ideal (Neptune) yet can’t seem to close the gap between her own personal look and the otherworldly refinement that Neptune represents. What ends up happening is that she becomes too artificial, some would even call her grotesque – she simply can’t find peace with imperfection – everything has to be sweet and pretty to the point that the coin flips and everything turns ugly. Although Neptune is usually associated with spirituality and the beauty of the divine, it is also associated with dissolution and disintegration – which often manifests as madness. Kim Kardashian has many times been rude or downright aggressive because of her vanity and venusian pride. Madonna also has this square and she certainly falls in the category of people who care enormously about their appearance, being attractive and young even up until old age. Venus is the goddess of youth and beauty and Neptune holds the promise of redemption through the planet(s) that it aspects. It’s easy to see how this square relationship between the planets could run amok. If youth is the gate to heaven, one would be willing to go very far in order to not let the imperfections stop heaven from becoming a reality. When it comes to love and relationships there’s inevitability of disappointment and uncertainty – one tends to look for the perfect partner yet no one can be it all in terms of fulfilling the dream because the standards are set too high. On the flip side, the standards can also be too low, because of the Neptunian tendency is to either be unrealistically idealistic or stubbornly accepting and passive in destructive situations.

The opposition aspect doesn’t typically bring out the obsession with perfect love and beauty. It makes the individual aware that love, in it’s selfish guise of wanting another person or object tied to the self in some way because of good looks and style, is antithetical to universal love. In a sense, personal love must be sacrificed for communion with the source of life, that which many people call God – or, God must be sacrificed for ordinary human seduction, value and pleasure.  These are the people who are only looking to touch the source of life through love and union, nothing more. They’re not looking to simple hedonistic pleasures or superficial adornments. If they do, they’re doing it at the detriment of true compassion and communion with all of life. George Harrison had this opposition in his chart and so had Bob Marley. Both were musicians, both used drugs and both had a deep urge for spirituality. Both emphasized the importance of the connection with God and pointed out the triviality of worldly matters. Venus, is to an extent, quite earthy and materialistic. She cares about being nice, looking nice and behaving in a way that causes others to admire her. It seems like Harrison lost his first marriage because of incessant drug use and infidelities. Neptune is boundless and is everywhere and anywhere – there was no way Venus, ruling marriage and social contracts, could conquer the pull of the promise of ecstatic union. With the opposition, either special partnership/marriage or God is the pursuit, neither can exists in conjunction with the other.  

[spookykumquat]

hear me out:

Steddie Hunger Games AU

Depending on how people feel about this, i might turn this whole idea into a fic, so please comment/DM me any ideas, scenes you might want to see, or even just little details that you'd like me to include! But, for now, enjoy my thoughts

colour code:

•cool colours are for protagonists, their alliance, and tools/skill sets

•warm colours are for antagonists, their alliance, and their tools/skill sets

•white (names) are either unaligned or vaguely aligned

Eddie

Eddie would have the same character type as Katniss. At first, he's seen as unlikable by those who don't know him, and is generally disliked by anyone that he challenges the beliefs of, similarly to how Katniss is disliked by many people in the Capital. However, Eddie still manages to gain the attention of those that stand with him by challenging the rules laid out by society. Though he doesn't know much about the circumstances going into it, during the Hunger Games themselves, Eddie is resourceful, and learns to adapt to his environment. He doesn't look to kill people unless he absolutely has to, but Eddie wouldn't hesitate to sabotage them in non-lethal ways. If given the choice, Eddie would choose a sickle as his weapon, though chances are he'd have to make something- starting with a spear, but then progressing to attaching several to a larger piece of wood to create something similar to his nail-shield.

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Steve

Personally, I feel like Steve would be similar to Peeta. It's easy for him to become popular among people- all he has to do is smile and wave, perhaps crack a few jokes to be generally liked by the majority of people. (To top off the similarities in likeability, both Steve and Peeta's parents have little faith in them. Not a main point, but would like to mention it.) However, he has very few skills that would be useful in the actual games himself. His first step off the pedestal would be in the opposite direction of the Cornucopia, trying to make a run for it as his best chance at surviving. Like he did in school, he'd join a group strictly so he'd survive (though this time it's literally), and split from them the minute he realizes they know he doesn't fit. Eventually, Eddie would find them, and the two would stick together- at first out of necessity, but then out of love (clearly one-sided to begin with. Perhaps, pre-games, Steve would've mentioned that there was someone special to him in the games). When it comes to his weapon of choice, he'd try to find a mace, but given that he didn't run to the Cornucopia during the Bloodbath, he'd make do with a thorny stick, or a stick with plenty of knots/sharp branches, similar to his nail bat. Over time, he'd learn the art of camouflage to help himself hide.

Also, when they're put in any sort of situation, they work well together. On their own, both Steve and Eddie have been shown to have self-sacrificial tendencies, kind of like Peeta and Katniss at the end of the first hunger games.

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Dustin

Dustin, being the closest to Eddie, would fit Rue's character. Throughout season 4, it's made clear that Dustin looks up to Eddie, similar to the way Rue admires Katniss. He's also extremely resourceful, more than happy to help Eddie, and do his best to guide him out of sticky situations. Just as in Stranger Things, the two of them would be a great duo. If Eddie were to lose Dustin, it'd have to be by chance.

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The party

The rest of the party would most likely act as the Careers (the group that is specially trained for the Hunger Games in their districts and are typically volunteers. They're always from district 1 and 2, but occasionally district 4 joins them. Their alliance is formed while they're training).

Max, being the most resourceful of the group, would become the leader. She's also quite objective when it comes to possibly difficult tasks, so, although she'd eventually feel guilt about it, Max would have little objections to hunting other tributes.

Mike, Lucas, and El, all having came from the same districts, would form an alliance.

Lucas would be the best at short range combat, using either a sword or dagger as his weapon of choice.

El seems like she'd be more of a long-distance hunter, and would avoid killing people unless absolutely necessary. However, if she were with a group that was hunting someone, she'd do her best to psychologically weaken them- perhaps taunting them over other events that have happened in the arena. To clarify, I don't think she's canonically a cruel character, but I feel like this is the best bridge between her powers in the ST universe and what her character could be in Panem. Her weapon of choice would be either be a spear or bow and arrow.

Mike would be the most knowledgeable about the environment and logical with the plan. Though he could definitely work an axe or hatchet for hunting, and wouldn't hesitate much when it came to killing fellow tributes, his strengths would lie in the logistics of all of it. He'd be able to figure out the best places to forage, hunt, etc., and help make nearly fool proof plans when hunting the other tributes.

Will, having began the games without an alliance, would join the party out of necessity; a life or death situation. None of them are particularly fond of Will, they keep him around because of his tracking skills.

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Dr. Brenner

This one is definitely more of a stretch. I was having trouble thinking of someone that could be seen as Effie Trinket (the lady that pulls the names for District 12), but perhaps that could be Dr. Brenner. Just like Effie supports the tributes, Brenner serves to support El in season 4.

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Murray

Though we never get the pleasure of seeing Murray interacting with anyone except for Joyce, Hopper, Nancy, and Johnathan (or, if you want to count it: El, Max, and Argyle briefly), it's clear that he can definitely suit some sort of mentorship position, like Haymitch. It also fitting that neither of them are exactly eager to help at first, but are very clearly invested when whoever they're mentoring really gets rolling. Bonus: they both like to drink while they work, are canonically decent fighters, and very clearly cut out for life or death situations.

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Robin & Nancy

Due to how rebellious their characters are, I feel like both Nancy and Robin would play the same role as Cinna (the seamstress). They both believe in Steve and Eddie, definitely supporting them through their journeys.

Personally, I feel like Robin would more closely resemble Cinna during the 74th games. She can make a statement through unoffending stylistic choices (specifically, I'm thinking about Cinna giving Peeta and Katniss outfits that are quite literally on fire, and how it displayed that they're reaching to make a change- they won't be just another set of tributes that are forgotten about. I'm also thinking about what Robin has written on her converse: "won't go down in history but i will go down on your sister" along with other things).

Nancy would more closely resemble Cinna during the 75th games where he's more bold, but just as impactful. (tbh I'm not quite sure why I originally thought this- Robin also seems to be the more outspoken person and more like Cinna all around. But hey, at least this way Nancy gets a gun :) )

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Vecna/001

He's the only one I could ever see as President Snow. i don't think i need to explain

[ddaengtae]

a bit much || myg

pairing: min yoongi x reader

genre: college, enemies? to lovers, a wee bit of angst, smut

word count: 16.9k (lmao sorry)

summary: it’s your senior year of college.  after surviving three years, nothing could surprise you, right?  wrong.  you can’t seem to catch a minute of peace from the moment the beautiful, yet utterly obnoxious min yoongi decides to sit in the seat next to you in one of your lectures and takes every opportunity he can get to pester you.  he’s just doing this to piss you off, right? (or maybe he’s an awkward idiot).

a/n: i’ve written for quite a few other fandoms in the past, but this is my first bts piece i’ve actually decided to publish here after transitioning this blog into bts trash.  this has been a work in progress since yoongi decided to hit us with that daechwita video and give me all the feels.  would love to hear your feedback.  sorry if there’s any typos but enjoy!!!

Senior year of college was here.  The last first day of classes you would ever experience was upon you.  The fact that you had made it this far felt almost close to miraculous; taking into account all of the late-night library mental breakdowns, near-death drunk experiences, and relationship drama, it was shocking that you had made it this far in one piece.  Yet here you were, seated in a familiar, large lecture hall preparing for the first day of a history gen-ed class.  Why hadn’t you listened to everyone else and gotten all of your gen-eds out of the way freshman year?  That would have been the smart thing to do, leaving you to take all fun classes for your final year.  The class was probably going to be full of freshmen, too eager to befriend a lonesome senior such as yourself with the hopes of coercing you to buy them alcohol or invite them to upperclassmen parties.  Cringe.  And yet here you were.

As you spread your neatly-labeled notebook and color-coordinated pens out in front of you, you couldn’t help but feel someone’s eyes burning into the side of your head.  Oh no.  Had the freshmen already scoped you out as obviously older than them and an easy target?  Class hadn’t even started yet.  Chewing on your lower lip, you tilted your head to the side slightly and allowed your eyes to meet those of the unknown source.  Immediately, your breath hitched in your throat.

There before you stood Min Yoongi.  Although the two of you had never met before, you were aware of his existence through mutual friends and word of mouth.  The boy was gorgeous; even with his dark, piercing eyes intimidating you nearly to death, you felt as if you were going to melt into the ground as you took in the features of his face.  A thick red headband pushed his bleached blonde hair out of his face, allowing you to take in more of his perfectly sculpted features.  The plump of his cheeks and lips seemed to contrast the rest of his frightening yet gorgeous attributes, giving the appearance of a sort of twisted innocence.  

“Is somebody sitting here?” the boy interrupted your fantasies in a deep, low voice, motioning to the empty seat to your right.

Blinking a few times to snap back into reality, you shook your head and turned back to your belongings, cheeks tinted pink.  “No, you can have it.”

With a loud slam of his backpack onto the table, he sank into the seat beside you.  As you stared down at your notebook and began to nervously jot down the date and any other unimportant details you could think of, you were quite conscious of the feeling of Yoongi’s eyes studying you.

“Is this history gen-ed or do I have the wrong room?” he tried to question genuinely, but you could hear an amused glimmer in the tone of his voice.  “This whole elaborate set-up you have going on has me thinking this is an art class or something.  It’s a bit much.”

Just as your cheeks had finally started to cool down, the color rushed to them yet again.  The judgement in his voice suddenly had you embarrassed of the organizational skills that you usually took pride in, your instincts making you put your arms up on either side of your notebook and pens in an attempt to block them from his view.  As the judgement settled in, it slowly morphed into a deeper feeling of annoyance.  Sure he was hot, but who did this complete stranger think he was making fun of you?

“Tell that to my grades,” you simply muttered back, the sound of the professor’s voice at the front of the lecture hall cutting you off from indulging further in your irritated thoughts.  Rolling your eyes to yourself, you shifted your body to face the front of the room and clicked down on one of your favorite pens, ready for the start of the new semester.

As you were now occupied with learning the layout of the new course, you missed the way Yoongi’s eyes scanned up and down the side of your face and his lips fell into a lop-sided grin.

The happenings of the first day of class proved to be the beginning of a pattern.  Although the chances of Yoongi coming to class were a hit or miss, whenever he did happen to show up, his behavior was the same.

One day about two weeks into the semester, the boy in question showed up approximately thirty seconds before class was set to begin.  Rather than rush into his seat and shovel out his things, he remained standing for a few moments too long, his eyes traveling up and down your appearance.

“A dress and heels?” Yoongi interrogated, a quiet chuckle slipping through his lips as he finally plopped down into his seat.  His dark eyes searched yours as he raised an eyebrow.  “A bit much for class, don’t you think?”

Sighing to yourself, you smoothed the floral skirt of your yellow sundress out over your thighs.  Couldn’t he ever just let you exist in peace?  “They’re wedges,” you corrected, digging the heel of your shoe into the carpet beneath you to let out some of your frustration.  Feeling a bit braver today than during your first few interactions, you allowed your eyes to rake up and down his body slowly, faking a judgmental look on your face.  The corner of your lips quirked upward slightly as you noticed the way he seemed to freeze in place at your actions.  “Some of us actually enjoy putting a little bit of effort into our appearance, you know.”  A white lie of course, but a necessary one.  Even in his joggers and oversized hoodie, the blonde boy managed to look like a model beside you.

Yoongi’s eyes widened just the slightest bit in surprise at your fighting words, but nonetheless, an amused laugh bubbled through his body.  “Didn’t take you for the feisty type…” he trailed off, tapping the edge of his pen against the table in front of him.  “You loo–”

His voice cut off abruptly as the professor’s voice boomed through the lecture hall, signaling the beginning of class.  Rather than finish his mysterious statement, Yoongi turned to face the front of the room, smiling to himself as he jotted down the date in the corner of his notebook.

Three weeks into the semester, friendship or even acquaintanceship seemed out of the question for you and Yoongi.  Although he was physically still the beautiful boy you had daydreamed about prior to having met him, his personality destroyed any fantasies you had about him being a quiet, misunderstood boy.  It seemed as if though he refused to let you catch a break in class.

As the professor finally dismissed class after what felt like an eternity, you shut your notebook and picked it up off of the table, ready to rush back to your room and indulge in a much-needed nap.  Before you could shove your belongings into your backpack and rush out of the room, Yoongi’s voice cut you off.

“Hey, do you have the notes from last class?” he asked, folding his hands together as he offered you a small smile.  “I was, uh, sick.”

Although his half-assed excuse was clearly complete bullshit, you weren’t exactly in the mood to cause a scene and knew you were more likely to get out of the room faster if you just caved in and let him have at it rather than force him to beg.  “Yeah, sure,” you muttered, opening your notebook to your notes from the previous class and plopping it down in front of him.  “Knock yourself out.”  You wished he literally would.

Digging his phone out of his pocket and opening the camera, Yoongi glanced down at the notes before side-eyeing you with what initially appeared to be an authentic smile spreading across his plump lips.  “You know, I saw something earlier that I think might interest you.”

Was Min Yoongi actually trying to start a genuine conversation with you?  Intriguing, to say the least.  Crossing your arms over your chest, you raised an eyebrow at him.  “Yeah?  What was it?”

His eyes flickered back down to your notes, the once seemingly genuine smile on his lips morphing into a devious smirk.  “I saw a flyer earlier about an art contest happening on campus,” he replied a bit too casually, beginning to take pictures of your notes.  “I’m sure they’d be extremely interested in the artistry and precision of your history gen-ed notes.  Truly a masterpiece.”

Any momentary hope you had of Yoongi not being an asshole diminished in that instant, your hands immediately reaching down to rip your notebook out of the view of his phone camera and slamming it shut.  “You’re a dick,” you muttered, rolling your eyes as you stormed past him.  “Get the notes from someone else.”

As you rushed out of the now empty classroom, you missed the way Yoongi’s once amused expression changed into a frown, his hand reaching up to rub the back of his neck in frustration at himself.

On a Wednesday one month into the semester, you were having arguably one of the worst days of the year.  As syllabus week was long over, the workload in your classes had increased exponentially overnight and you were left feeling exhausted and overwhelmed.  Having gotten into an unwarranted fight with one of your more difficult housemates the night before, you had gone to bed frustrated and forgot to set an alarm.  While this would not have been an issue on a regular Wednesday, you had forgotten that you had an interview scheduled with a potential employer for a job after your senior year would inevitably come to an end.  Having apparently been in desperate need of some extra sleep, you didn’t become conscious until approximately 11:45am, fifteen minutes before your history lecture and long after the interview that had been set for 9:00am.

Tears threatened to sting your eyes as you rushed out of bed, quickly becoming aware of the weight of the situation you had fallen into.  How could you be so irresponsible and miss the opportunity to get hired for a position in your field?  So many seniors already had jobs secured for the summer even though it was only October of the fall semester.  You were a mess.

These negative thoughts only became louder as you rushed across campus toward the lecture hall, glancing down for a moment to take in your appearance.  You were sporting a pair of black joggers and an oversized hoodie that belonged to your best friend, Kim Taehyung.  In addition to this already rather unpleasant sight, you hadn’t had the time to do your skincare routine or makeup, and your bedhead was thrown into a messy bun on the top of your head, threatening to fall out of the elastic at any moment.  As someone who usually was well put together, you were extremely uncomfortable with roaming the campus with your current appearance.  The lethal combination of your messy appearance and the chaotic night and morning you had experienced had you feeling quite insecure as you finally rushed into your lecture hall with twenty seconds to spare, sinking down into your seat with your eyes low.

Just as you thought the morning couldn’t get any worse, the presence beside you just had to make himself known.  “All dressed up for me?” Yoongi asked sarcastically, smirking as he looked you up and down.  “I thought ‘some of us enjoy putting effort into our appearance.’”

While on any regular day Yoongi’s sarcastic comments were enough to get under your skin, today they proved to be unbearable.  Slamming your notebook down on the table in front of you, you twisted your whole body to face the amused boy.  “Can you just leave me the fuck alone?  For once?” you snapped a bit too loudly, noticing the way that a few of your classmates turned to look at the pair of you.  Before you could wish for the ground to swallow you up in that instant, your professor started to speak to begin class, snapping everyone’s attention away from you.  Swallowing to yourself, you turned to face forward, keeping your head low as you stared down at your notebook.

With your eyes averted, you didn’t notice the way that Yoongi’s expression fell and he stared at the side of your face with such deep concern that you weren’t even aware he was capable of feeling, wondering what he had done to make you that upset.  Was he really that intolerable?

About fifteen minutes into class, the sound of your phone vibrating next to your books snapped you out of your daze.  As your eyes scanned over the screen, your heart sank down to your stomach.

mom (12:16pm): Hey honey, how’d the interview go?  Bet you crushed it xo :)

The tears you had managed to hold back on your way to class were now stinging at the corners of your eyes.  Fucking up your own life was one thing, but disappointing your parents who had such high expectations of you and often talked about you with so much pride was another whole ballpark.  The thought of having to break the news to your sweet mother that you had fucked up yet again made you feel sick to your stomach.

As the first tears escaped your eyes and slid down your cheeks into visibility, you quickly shut your notebook and shuffled to your feet on shaky legs, not even bothering to shove your belongings into your backpack.  Ignoring the puzzled looks you were receiving from your classmates, especially Yoongi, you stormed out of the lecture hall and didn’t stop moving until you pushed your way into the nearest bathroom.  The moment the door of the single-stall closed shut, you slid down the side of the door and put your face in your hands.

Of course you knew this would all pass.  Of course you would figure things out with your housemate.  Of course you could try to reschedule the interview, or even just apply to other jobs if that didn’t work out.  Of course you could just explain things to your mom.  But college had a funny way of throwing so many things at you at once that sometimes it was hard to think straight and see things clearly.  Sometimes you just had to cry for a little bit to let out some of the stress.  So that was precisely what you did.

When you finally were able to compose yourself at least a bit, you fished your phone out of your pocket, immediately dialing the number of the only person you felt comfortable talking to at the moment.  There was no way you were going back into that lecture hall after the scene you had caused.  

“Hey, what’s up?” Taehyung’s deep voice sounded through the speaker, the low tone immediately sending a sense of comfort through your body.

Inhaling deeply, you rose to your feet and wiped the last of the tears from the corners of your eyes with the sleeve of the hoodie that happened to belong to the boy on the other end of the phone.  “Hey, can I come over?” you asked, sniffling quietly.  “Your place is closer than mine and I’m kind of a mess right now.”

“Hey, hey.  What’s wrong?” he asked, genuine concern laced in his voice.  He sensed your apprehension in discussing your problems over the phone and decided to speak up again.  “Actually, you don’t need to answer that right now.  I’ll leave the door unlocked for you.” You could hear him shuffling around on the other end.  “I was actually just about to text you.  I finally cleaned my place and found some of your clothes from when we used to, you know… Do the dirty.”

For the first time that day, a giggle forced itself through your lips.  What an absurd way to refer to your past attempts at a friends with benefit situation with Taehyung.  The two of you had been friends since freshman year of college, or even before that if you wanted to be specific.  Having been in the same orientation group the summer before starting college, the boy with the boxy grin was an immediate standout to you.  After being placed together by your orientation leader in a partner activity, you discovered that you had a lot of the same interests and the same, twisted sense of humor.  From that moment on, the two of you vowed to stick together through the ups and downs of college.  Apart from sticking together academically by taking most of the same literature classes together, you acted as each other’s emotional support system.  Whether it be a bad grade on an assignment, a painful breakup, or even a miserable hangover, you were there for each other.  Sometime during the beginning of your sophomore year when both of you were going through breakups and wanted to get laid without catching feelings for someone else, you struck up a friends with benefits deal that lasted all the way through the middle of your junior year.  The deal served its purpose well; the sex was good and there were no feelings involved, despite the concerns of some of your friends.  It was mutually ended when you both decided that you were ready to put yourselves out there romantically again.  There was no awkwardness for either of you.  The friendship remained as strong as ever and you were grateful to have someone as supportive as Taehyung in your life.

“Good, I could use a change of clothes right now,” you responded, finally working up the nerve to exit the bathroom and make your way out of the building.  “You’re the best.  I’ll be there in 10.”

As always, Taehyung knew just how to cheer you up.  Immediately upon your arrival, he insisted you take a hot shower to allow yourself to calm down alone for a bit.  To your delight, he had discovered one of your cute black t-shirts and a pair of ripped mom jeans you had been looking for forever while cleaning his room, allowing you to change out of the dreadful outfit you had been wearing earlier.  After combing your hair and putting the emergency makeup in your backpack to use, you were back to looking like a presentable human being and returned to Taehyung, plopping down beside him on his bed and resting your head comfortably on his chest.

Taehyung knew how to calm you down unlike anyone else in your life.  He allowed you to rant for nearly an hour, only chiming in when you asked for his advice or to offer words of comfort and encouragement.  By the end of the conversation, you were left feeling much more relaxed and acknowledged that none of the issues that you found yourself in were irreparable.  

Glancing down at your phone, you sat up straight as you noticed the time.  “Shit, I have class in twenty minutes.  I should get going in a few.”

Taehyung sat up beside you, reaching his arms overhead to stretch with a loud yawn.  It had become quite clear to you that he had skipped all of his classes today by his disheveled hair and his boxer-clad body.  “Are you feeling better now?”

Nodding, you flashed him a small smile as you rose to your feet and took the opportunity to stretch out your own body.  “Yes, much.  Thanks, Tae,” you praised, glancing at yourself in the mirror and fixing a few messy strands of hair.  “Honestly, I think I would’ve been fine if it wasn’t for that asshole Yoongi.”

“Yoongi?  As in Min Yoongi?” Taehyung questioned, authentic interest laced into his voice.

“Mhmm, that’s the one.”

“Hmm, interesting.  Namjoon’s been hanging out with him a bit now that he’s gotten closer to Hoseok.  I think they’re doing some sort of music thing together.  He’s brought him around here a few times recently,” the boy informed you, finally rising to his feet to stand beside you.  “He seemed cool, but if he’s an asshole to you I won’t hesitate to kick his ass.”

Hmm.  Now that was some interesting information.  Namjoon was one of Taehyung’s two roommates, Jimin being the other one.  Seokjin had lived with them in previous years, but his room was left vacant after he had graduated the previous year.  Still living nearby and remaining close to all of you, he often visited on the weekends to fill the void.

That wasn’t your concern though.  Namjoon was Taehyung’s sweet, clumsy dork of a roommate that you had also grown close to over the years.  After meeting Hoseok the previous semester through Namjoon, their friendship made sense.  Hoseok was loud, bubbly, and impossible to hate.  The boy didn’t have a bad bone in his body.  How the fuck did Yoongi fit into the mix?

Snapping back into reality, you giggled to yourself and pulled your concerned best friend into a tight hug.  “Don’t worry about it, Tae.  He just says stupid shit to get under my skin and today I was extra vulnerable.  Nothing major,” you reassured, giving him a squeeze.  “Thanks again for listening to me.  I’ll text you after class to get dinner or something.”

“If you say sooooo,” Taehyung drawled, pressing an affectionate kiss to the top of your head.  “Of course.  I’ll see you later.”

Flashing him one last grateful smile, you turned on your heel and pushed open the door of his bedroom, quietly closing it behind you.  The peaceful scenery of Taehyung’s bedroom was greatly contrasted with what was occurring in the common area, and nothing could have prepared you for what you were about to face.

“Y/N!  I thought I heard you show up earlier,” Namjoon shouted out to you from behind the kitchen counter, offering you a warm, dimpled smile.

“I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever, Joon,” you replied sincerely, returning the smile.  As you approached the kitchen, your eyes took in the faces of the familiar figures before you.  Namjoon… Jimin… Hoseok… No.

No fucking way.  It was as if Taehyung’s comment about Namjoon’s new friendship just moments prior had been a warning to you, because there before you stood Min fucking Yoongi right beside Hoseok.  It was evident by the look on his face that he had spotted you before you noticed his presence.  Rather than sporting his signature smirk, his mouth was slightly open and his eyes were wide with what could only be shock.  If you had allowed your gaze to remain on him a bit longer, maybe you would have noticed the genuine concern and sympathy in his eyes as he stared back at you.

“It’s because Tae hogs her and barely lets us have any time with her,” Jimin commented, chuckling as he glanced down at his phone for a moment.  “Oh, before I forget, Y/N…  Jungkook needs a model for his photography project and told me to ask you for him because he’s too nervous to ask you himself.”

Namjoon laughed to himself, shaking his head.  “I see Jungkook is still trying to live out his noona kink.”

Giggling to yourself, you rolled your eyes as you fully entered the kitchen and grabbed your backpack off of the stool where you had left it earlier.  Your friends were referring to Jeon Jungkook, a current sophomore who had found his way into your circle of friends early on in his freshman year after taking a few classes with Namjoon and Jimin.  The two of you weren’t particularly close as you typically only saw him on the weekends and in passing, but he was a friendly addition to the group.  Despite hearing about how popular he was with the sophomore girls, you found it hard to believe.  Every time Jungkook was around you, he seemed to turn into a nervous, stuttering mess, much to the rest of the boys’ enjoyment.

“Leave my little Kookie alone.  He’s an angel,” you responded, slinging your backpack over your shoulder.  “Tell him of course I’ll do it.”

“Phew, I think he’d pass out if I told him you referred to him as your Kookie,” Namjoon pestered on, nosily glancing over Jimin’s shoulder in amusement as the shorter boy typed out the news to Jungkook.

“I will be leaving that part out for now.” Jimin chuckled, slipping his phone back into his pocket before his eyes met yours again.  “Oh, I don’t know if Tae told you yet, but we’re planning on throwing a little party Friday night.  You should come, Y/N.”  Little party.  Whenever Jimin claimed he was just throwing a “little party,” it was often anything but little.

Taehyung had not told you yet, but you weren’t exactly surprised as he was a bit of a scatter brain when it came to remembering minute details.  Pursing your lips, you crossed your arms over your chest.  “We’ll see.”

Namjoon rolled his eyes, moving closer to shove his shoulder against yours.  “We all know that’s your way of trying to appease us momentarily and then end up not showing up.  Come on, Y/N.”

Jimin stuck out his lower lip, clasping his hands together to plead.  “Pleaaase, Y/N.  You never party with us anymore like you used to.  We miss you.”

“If not for us, do it for Tae,” Namjoon argued, poking your cheek.  “Or even for your little Kookie.”

Dramatically shaking your head, you shoved Namjoon back as you rolled your eyes.  “I’ll think about it, okay?”

“Hmm, you better.”

A moment of silence fell upon the group before you were forced back into the reality of the current situation that you were trying to avoid.

“Oh shit, sorry Y/N.  I’m being rude,” Hoseok interrupted from the other side of the counter, offering you a sheepish smile.  “This is my friend Yoongi.  I’ve finally been managing to drag him out to hang out with some of my friends.  Quite the antisocial one here.”

Ah.  How could you forget he was here?  Also, antisocial?  Hilarious.  The boy in question never kept his big mouth shut around you.  The look of pure discomfort that spread across Yoongi’s face when Hoseok brought the silent boy to your attention caused you to feel nothing but pure joy.

“Oh, no worries at all, Hobi,” you replied sweetly, flashing the boy an all-too-pleasant smile.  “Yoongi and I have actually already had the pleasure of meeting.  Isn’t that right, Yoongi?”

Nothing pleased you more than witnessing the look of sheer panic plastered across Yoongi’s face as he reached up to rub the back of his neck.  His typical overly confident persona was gone; he was now putty in your hands and you loved the feeling of being in control for once.  If only this moment could last forever.

“Uh, yeah we have,” Yoongi muttered, attempting to appease Hoseok’s confused face with a not-so-convincing smile.  “We have history class together this semester.”

“History?”  Hoseok’s eyes glanced back and forth between the two of you, as if trying to process something.  At last, they settled on Yoongi.  “Weren’t you just telling me you made some girl cry in history class today?”

If Yoongi hadn’t been mortified before, he surely was now.  It almost seemed as if his face was frozen, his eyes and mouth all wide in the shape of an ‘o.’  Just as you thought this interaction could not possibly get any more uncomfortable for Yoongi, his eyes flickered away from yours to move behind you.  Whatever it was that he saw left him looking even more disoriented, earning an amused smirk from you.

At last the sight Yoongi had observed made his presence known to you, Taehyung’s voice causing you to spin around on your heel to face him.  “Guys, let Y/N go to class in peace.  She’s had a rough day.”

You had to bite down on your tongue to avoid the laughter that was threatening to force its way through your lips.  As your eyes raked up and down Taehyung’s body, you were quite aware of why Yoongi had looked so stunned just moments before.  Taehyung stood before the group just as he had beside you in his bedroom a few minutes ago, hair a complete mess and sporting nothing but a pair of tight boxers.  Although the sight was nothing unusual to you and most of the boys, you knew by Yoongi’s expression that he had assumed that you and Taehyung had been hooking up before you emerged into the kitchen.  Even though it was false, you found yourself enjoying the current situation immensely.  You were well aware by the way Yoongi usually teased and belittled you in class that he perceived you as the quiet, innocent type, and you knew this scene would cause him to question everything.  How good it felt to be the one making Yoongi feel like shit for once.

“Tae, don’t worry about it.  We were just talking,” you assured him, reaching up to ruffle his messy hair.  While this act of affection was typical for the two of you, you knew it would be perceived differently in Yoongi’s eyes.  “But I do actually have to go to class now.  I’ll see you guys around, okay?”

The sound of various “goodbyes” and “we better see you at the party” filled your ears as you turned on your heel, but not before taking one last glance at Yoongi, knowing this was likely the last time you would have the pleasure of seeing the confident boy looking so distraught.  His eyebrows were knit together as he frantically looked you up and down, almost as if he was trying to search for the quiet, jittery girl he was used to seeing in class.  Although you knew this newfound confidence you were feeling surrounded by your group of close friends probably wouldn’t last when you saw him alone in class on Friday, you allowed yourself to indulge in this little victory where he was the one looking like the fool.

Directing one last small smirk at the confused boy, you finally approached the door and slipped out.  The moment you exited the building and walked toward the academic quad, you couldn’t hold back the laughter you had been keeping in for what felt like an eternity.  The unfortunate events of the morning had been long forgotten; you had achieved your first victory of the day and it was a big one for you.

When you finally slipped into your classroom with five minutes to spare, you took a moment to retrieve your phone out of your bag, blinking in confusion at all of the texts you had received in just a few minutes.

kookie (2:49pm): thanks for agreeing to help me w my project!!! :)

kookie (2:49pm): i promise it won’t be too much work for you

kookie (2:50pm): sorry for being a loser and not asking you myself

kookie (2:50pm): hopefully i’ll see you friday night? :)

Aw.  What a cutie.  Now onto the rest of your texts.

tae tae (2:51pm): yoongi will not stop asking us questions about you

tae tae (2:51pm): he asked if me and you were dating and then got confused when we all laughed

tae tae (2:52pm): also suspiciously curious about who jungkook is

tae tae (2:52pm): now he’s asking all about how long we’ve been friends for.  wtf is he trying to get at

tae tae (2:55pm): ya know i think he has a crush on you or something

You let out an exasperated gasp as you read the last text, barely believing your eyes.  Yoongi, the boy who managed to make every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at noon unbearable for you without fail for the past month, having a crush on you?  The thought was laughable.

Before you could type out an adequate response to such absurdity, your phone buzzed again.

jiminie (2:56pm): so what’s the deal w you and yoongi? seems ~steamy~  👀

jiminie (2:56pm): i feel like he somehow knows i’m texting about him

jiminie (2:56pm): he’s glaring at me

jiminie (2:57pm): didn’t take you as one to go for the intimidating ones hmm

jimine (2:57pm): i’ll let kookie know he has to be scarier

It was understandable for Taehyung to have such irrational ideas, but now Jimin too?  If your friends saw the way he talked to you in class, they would be laughing at themselves too.  Someone grab these boys their clown suits.

Biting the inside of your cheek, you locked your phone without responding to either of your friends.  That would be an issue for a later time.

The next two days rolled by rather smoothly.  Your housemate had apologized to you after realizing that she had overreacted for yelling at you for leaving your dishes in the sink when you were busy with homework, you had managed to get the missed interview rescheduled, and you had explained the situation to your understanding mother.  Most importantly, it was now Friday and you were more than ready for the weekend.  Things seemed to be finally falling back into order.

After getting an early lunch with one of your friends before your class at noon, you found yourself with fifteen minutes to spare before your class and it didn’t seem worthwhile to try to go back to your house or even the library.  It wouldn’t hurt to be a bit early for class.

When you finally entered the lecture hall from the back, the sight before you caused you to come to an immediate halt.  As it was still quite early, the class was empty all except for one person who you could identify even from behind due to his bright, bleached blonde hair.  What the fuck was Min Yoongi doing fifteen minutes early to class?  It was generous to even expect him to show up a whole minute before start time.  This was unprecedented.

You momentarily considered turning on your heel and leaving the room until right before noon, but it would be too much of a hassle to find somewhere to sit outside and the sound of the door closing behind you had already notified him that someone else was in the room.  As you accepted your fate and began to walk down the aisle, your eyes stopped on the space in front of your usual seat.  There in front of your seat sat a large coffee.  Had somebody already taken your seat?  Was Yoongi saving your seat for someone else to avoid you after your last interaction on Wednesday?

Working up the nerve, you continued to walk closer, only stopping once you were right in front of Yoongi.  The confidence you had found around your friends on Wednesday had seemed to diminish.  Before you could even allow yourself to take in the nervous expression on his face, you forced yourself to speak.  “Hey, did somebody take my seat?”

Yoongi blinked a couple times in confusion before his eyes wandered over to the coffee in front of your seat, a sense of comprehension taking over his features.  The calm expression on his face didn’t last.  Suddenly, the same anxious Yoongi you had experienced in Taehyung’s kitchen was back, his cheeks heating up and his hand reaching up to rub the back of his neck.  You had noticed that was a nervous habit of his.  Clearing his throat, he shook his head before finally attempting to clear up the confusion.  “Uh, no…” His eyes darted around the area, moving anywhere but to your own.  “It’s for you… The coffee.”

The confusion certainly was not cleared up by his answer, and you were left feeling even more puzzled.  Why had Yoongi bought you a coffee?  And why did he seem so nervous about it?  Glancing down at the venti cup in front of you, you picked it up and examined the label on the side.  Venti iced caramel latte with almond milk and less ice, it read.  Wait a minute.  How did he know your exact order, down to the less ice?

Furrowing your brow, you crossed your arms over your chest and continued to glare at the clearly uncomfortable Yoongi, much to his dismay.  “How do you know my exact coffee order?”

Yoongi’s cheeks flushed darker, his hands reaching down as he grabbed his backpack off of the ground and attempted to distract himself by zipping it open and looking for his notebook for a bit too long.  “I zone out in class a lot and have happened to zone out on your coffee a few times so I happened to remember.”  When you stood your ground and refused to assume your seat next to his, his eyes finally met yours.  It seemed as if though he was trying to put on an irritated front, but you could see right through it.  “Just sit down and drink it, okay?”

After standing still and staring at him for a few moments longer just to further his discomfort, you finally let your arms fall to your sides and walked behind him to plop down in your seat.  Jabbing the straw into the top of the unexpected cup of coffee, you took a long sip.  Ah, the sweet sensation of caffeine flowing through your veins.  Almost as sweet as the feeling of a highly uncomfortable Yoongi sitting beside you.

You were well aware that he was waiting for you to speak first.  He was most definitely waiting for you to ask him why he got you the coffee.  He was also likely wishing you’d bring up Wednesday before he had to.  However, the knowledge of his discomfort made you hold off.  If he wanted to talk about it, he would have to initiate the conversation.  You were enjoying this role reversal just a bit too much.

After a few more moments in silence, Yoongi finally let out a defeated sigh and fully turned his body to face yours.  It was quite apparent by the distressed expression on his face that he had been having a battle with himself in his head to work up the courage to speak.  “Aren’t you going to ask me why I got you coffee?”  Ah, the male species was so predictable.

Taking another long sip from the coffee just to make him wait a bit longer, you quirked an eyebrow at him, feigning innocence.  “Am I supposed to?”

“Well, I mean, yeah.  I would expect you to be curious.”  Running a hand through his hair, he allowed his eyes to scan over your face.  When he realized you weren’t budging, he let out yet another sigh.  Poor guy.  “It’s an apology, okay?  I wanted to say I’m sorry for Wednesday.  You know, when you, um… Cried.  I was just joking around and had no idea I would upset you so much and I felt like a complete asshole.  I followed you when you ran out and tried to find you to see if you were okay, but you really disappeared.  I just… I know I’m not good with this kind of thing but I’m sorry.”

Clasping your hands together over your drink, you allowed yourself a moment to process all that was just thrown at you.  Not only was Yoongi apologizing to you, but did he just admit that he chased after you to try to comfort you after he saw you cry?  That seemed all too out of character for someone who was known for being overly confident and priding himself in his ‘I-don’t-give-a-fuck’ attitude.

Gnawing on your lower lip, you allowed yourself to take in his current state.  As he had told you, he clearly wasn’t very good at whatever “this” was.  What was “this” exactly?  Was it him having to apologize?  Or simply him having to not be a complete dick to you for more than thirty seconds?  Regardless, it was evident that he was being genuine.  His hand continued to rake through his hair, causing it to stick up in various directions.  Although his eyes were finally fixated on yours, the expression on his face communicated to you that he wished the ground would swallow him up at any moment.  It was strange seeing him this stressed for so long, but it was a welcomed change.  You knew all too well what it felt like to be so on edge, so you found yourself starting to feel a bit bad for him.  Maybe you could take it easy on him.  You had already felt the satisfaction of seeing him lose his ego for at least a little while, and that was enough for you.

Sighing to yourself, you shook your head and offered him a small smile.  “It’s fine, really.  Wasn’t even really your fault,” you assured him, reaching down into your backpack and fishing out your notebook as you noticed some of the other students finally started to file into the lecture hall.  “I had a lot going on and you just happened to be the one to set me off.”

“Are you sure?” Yoongi’s eyes trailed up and down your face as if he was trying to speculate if you were telling the truth or not.  Why did he suddenly care so much about your feelings?  “Do you want to talk about it?  I mean, why you were so upset and all…”

Furrowing your brow, you opened your notebook to a fresh sheet of paper.  “Uh, no.  Not really.  Talking like that isn’t exactly something we do,” you answered, crossing your arms over your chest defensively.  It almost felt like he was trying to pry into your life, and you weren’t sure why.  As your relationship– if you could even call it that– was strictly limited to unwanted banter and insults from Yoongi, you didn’t exactly feel comfortable opening up to him about your problems.  A pity coffee wasn’t enough to convince you otherwise.  “I already had the chance to rant about it anyway.”

Yoongi was silent for a moment as he copied your actions, opening his own notebook and distracting himself by flipping through various scantily-covered pages.  “Ah, with Taehyung?”

You sensed a tinge of judgment in his voice, causing you to recollect the events of Wednesday.  It was clear that your perception had been correct; the tone of Yoongi’s voice insinuated that he believed something was going on between you and Taehyung.  Apparently whatever Taeyung and the other boys had told him after you had left wasn’t enough to change his mind.  His judgment was a valid one, even expected, but his apparent need to ask you about it was not.  What did it matter to him?

“Yes, with Tae,” you replied simply, watching the way he doodled in the margins of his notebook.  “He is my best friend, afterall.”

“Oh, my bad.  Wasn’t aware he was ‘Tae’ to you,” Yoongi spoke up quickly, a small smirk tugging at the corners of his lips.  “I think we have different definitions of what a ‘best friend’ is, though.”  Ah, there he was.  The insolent Yoongi you had come to know and despise.

Rolling your eyes, you unknowingly pushed the coffee he had bought you further away, almost as if to symbolize that he was becoming repulsive to you yet again.  “I’m not quite convinced anyone would want to be your best friend anyway,” you snapped back, clicking open your pen.  “So was the coffee really an apology or just an excuse to pry into my life?”

“No, no.  It really was an apology,” he answered right away, pushing the coffee closer to you again in response.  “I’m just curious.  I guess my initial impression of you wasn’t entirely right.”

Now that was enough to get your full attention again.  Yoongi sure seemed to have a lot to think and say about you.  Raising an eyebrow, you hesitantly took another sip from your coffee.  “I wasn’t aware you had any impression of me to begin with.”

Yoongi chuckled to himself and shook his head, almost as if in disbelief of what you had just said.  “Oh, I have had a lot of thoughts about you.  I’ll keep them to myself, for your sake.”  If you hadn’t blinked, you would’ve noticed the way his eyes momentarily flickered down to your lips as they wrapped around the straw of your coffee.  “However, don’t worry.  I had it right that you’re a nerd who’s always going out of her way to do a bit much, and I stand by that.”

Scoffing to yourself, you slammed your drink down yet again.  “And you’re still an incessant asshole who pries into my life for absolutely no reason.”  Your eyes flickered to the front of the room as your professor took his place behind the podium.  “And I stand by that.”

Yoongi laughed a bit louder this time, clearly unbothered as he nodded his head at you as he turned his body to face the front of the class.  “Fair enough.”

Class seemed to fly by in a breeze, the majority of the lecture taken up by your professor outlining the content that would be on your first exam in the following week.  It was a lot of information, but you were confident that it wouldn’t be too challenging if you gave yourself enough time to study.  However, that was a problem for next week.  This weekend had to be about unwinding and giving yourself the proper amount of time to let go and relax.

Shoving your contents into your backpack, you were snapped out of your post-class daze by the sound of Yoongi’s low voice.  “Any fun plans this weekend?”

Blinking a few times to wake yourself back up, you slung your backpack over your shoulder and eyed the boy in front of you.  It was very unlike him to attempt to start a casual conversation with you, especially after class (that is, unless he was asking you for your notes). His odd behavior was continuing to surprise you.  “Uh, not sure…” you answered, taking a moment to push in your chair.  “Might need to make an appearance at a party tonight so my friends don’t kill me, but that’s about it.”

“Ah, the life of the party here.” Yoongi snickered, flashing you a lop-sided smirk before raising his hand slightly to give you a lackluster wave.  “See you around.”  With that, he spun around and quickly disappeared out of the lecture hall.

What an odd afternoon.

And you sure did see him around.  Much sooner than you would have liked, if you were being perfectly honest.

To your dismay, your lame excuses of “I’m sick” and “I have other plans” did not work on your friends, and they left you feeling guilty for trying to get out of going to their party.  Along with that, none of your housemates were particularly in the mood to go out, conceding that they’d much rather just stay in and watch a movie after such a chaotic week.

So that was precisely how you found yourself alone in the back of an Uber on the way to Taehyung’s house, discreetly trying to take shots out of a plastic water bottle filled with some old raspberry-flavored vodka that tasted closer to nail polish remover.  As painful as it was trying to hold in your gags so your Uber driver didn’t notice, you knew you couldn’t show up to the function sober.  Your friends were probably already ten rounds in.

As if on cue, your phone started to vibrate against your thigh, gladly distracting you from having to take another shot of poison.

joon (10:01pm): you better get your ass over here rn

joon (10:01pm): it’s still just all of us pregaming together and we want you here before everyone else shows up

joon (10:02pm): jimin is already absolutely plastered

jiminie (10:02pm): um nit thst drink theyre bing mwan to me

jiminie (10:02pm): cum here niw nd guv me s hug ;(

jiminie (10:03pm): o uiongi ia here too

Laughing to yourself as you didn’t even try to decipher the complete nonsense Jimin sent you, you glanced out the window as the car slowed to a stop in front of your destination.  After thanking your driver and sliding out of the car, you rose to your feet and smoothed out your lace top and black leather skirt.  It had been a while since you had allowed yourself to get all dressed up like this.  As you approached the door, you couldn’t help but notice the warm fuzzy feeling in your stomach and the head rush you felt from standing up so quickly.  Ah, the lovely effects of alcohol.

Before you could even ring the doorbell or text one of the boys that you had arrived, the door was swung open aggressively, revealing a grinning Seokjin holding a half-empty bottle of tequila in his free hand.  “Y/N!  I almost didn’t believe them when they said you were coming,” he cheered, pulling you inside and engulfing you in a tight hug.  Pulling back a bit to look at you, his eyebrows raised in amusement.  “And I can tell you already started drinking.  The old Y/N is back!”

“Hey, I knew I had to have a few shots beforehand if I was going to be able to tolerate all of you,” you joked, playfully shoving his chest.  Your eyes wandered upward as he held the bottle of tequila up as an offering over your mouth, quirking a challenging eyebrow at you.  Rolling your eyes, you leaned down and opened your mouth beneath the bottle, allowing him to pour a generous amount of the potent liquid into your mouth.  As you swallowed, you noted how it went down without much misery.  That was usually a good sign that you were tipsy.

“Taking it like a champ!” Seokjin chanted, draping an arm over your shoulders as he took another long swig from the bottle.  “We should probably head in there before the guys get mad at me for keeping you to myself.”

“Good idea.” You giggled, affectionately wrapping an arm around his waist for support.  

Before the two of you could even round the corner, you were stopped by a stumbling Jimin who practically threw himself onto your body, curling his arms around your waist and burying his face in your hair.  “Y/N, you’re finally here,” he slurred out, his fingers digging into the skin on your lower back.  Seokjin gave you an apologetic look before chuckling to himself and leaving the two of you alone.  “Did you get my texts?” He kept his arms wrapped around your waist as he pulled back a bit to meet your eyes, flashing you a huge grin with half-lidded eyes.  God he was plastered, but you were just tipsy enough to enjoy his affection.

“Yes, and I see you’ve already claimed your hug,” you greeted with a giggle, poking one of his dimples.  “That was about all I could make out from the complete nonsense you were sending me.”

Jimin’s eyes widened as he grabbed your hand from his face, messily intertwining his fingers with yours.  Leaning in, his lips brushed against your ears.  “You got my text that Yoongi is here, right?” he attempted a whisper, but his voice came out quite a bit louder than that.

It took a moment for your buzzed brain to fully comprehend the meaning behind his words.  Once they finally sunk in, your eyes widened.  Sure Yoongi was close with Namjoon and was beginning to bond with the other boys, but what exactly was he doing here?  Wouldn’t he have brought it up earlier when you told him you were probably going to be stopping by the party?  Why couldn’t this guy make sense for once?

When your thoughts finally subsided and the shot you had taken just a couple minutes before started to set in, you simply decided to squeeze Jimin’s hand and offer him a warm smile.  “It’s fine, Jimin.  We’re fine.”

“Nooo, you don’t understaaaand,” Jimin drawled out, completely giving up on trying to whisper this time.  The music was loud enough anyway that there was likely no need to worry.  “He told Hoseok and Namjoon last weekend that there was absolutely no chance he’d show up to our party.  He hates parties,” he explained, reaching down to grab your other hand as well.  “Now all of a sudden this afternoon he decided he was on board.  Me, Namjoon, and Tae have a conspiracy theory that he’s only here because he found out you’re gonna be here.”  Jimin’s eyes closed shut for a few moments and he stumbled back slightly, catching his balance at the last moment.  “Woooow, I’m drunk.”

You weren’t going to overthink this.  You were not going to let Min Yoongi ruin your one night to relax and have a good time.  Sure he did find out that you were likely going to be here when you told him this afternoon, but that was obviously a mere coincidence.  Perhaps he had just decided to not be a stick in the mud for once in his life and try to let go.  That was definitely it.  Wrapping an arm around Jimin’s waist to steady him, you began to walk towards the chaos that was likely occurring in the next room over.  “Don’t be ridiculous.  Let’s go have some fun and get you some water before you’re puking all over everything before people even start showing up.”

“Water.” Jimin chuckled to himself as he unsteadily followed by your side, leaning much of his weight into you.  “That’s cute.  You’re cute.”

Rolling your eyes, you guided the two of you into the kitchen, immediately being met with a parade of loud cheers from the six other guys who had been waiting for you (probably five cheering voices, since you weren’t exactly convinced Yoongi was involved). Speaking of Yoongi, although you refused to meet his eyes just yet, you could feel his eyes burning through you. While this action would usually make you quite uneasy and jittery, the alcohol was doing you another favor by allowing you to brush it off.

“It’s about time.” Taehyung flashed you his signature boxy grin and draped an arm over your shoulders. “What was going on over there? Were you and Jimin having a secret meeting or something?”

Reaching up to ruffle his hair, you nodded and smirked. “Yeah, actually we were…” you trailed off, your eyes setting on the various handles of liquor spread across the counter. “We were actually discussing how you’re a bitch if you don’t take a shot with me right now.”

There was an uproar of “ohhhh’s” from most of the boys that echoed throughout the whole room, followed by Taehyung’s booming laughter.  “Wow, I forgot how much I love feisty, drunk Y/N,” he commented, lining up two shot glasses on the counter and filling them with what was either silver tequila or another random flavored vodka.  God you were going to hate yourself in the morning for mixing so many different types of alcohol if you didn’t slow down soon. After handing one of the glasses to you, he clinked his against yours.  “Cheers to you.”

Giggling to yourself, you downed the shot, noting how it went down even easier than the one before.  You were in trouble if you kept moving at this pace.  However, you were aware that the house would be filling up with people outside of your immediate friend group shortly and that was enough reason to keep drinking.  As was Min Yoongi’s burning presence.

“I still haven’t forgotten about that party last time when you and Jimin beat me by one cup in beer pong,” Namjoon directed at you, chuckling to himself as he shook his head.  “Rematch now.  I’m taking Hoseok this time.”

“Ah, sore loser,” you retorted, sticking your tongue out at him.  Your eyes wandered over to Jimin who was leaning against the refrigerator with his eyes closed, no glass of water in sight.  He clearly was not beer pong partner material at the moment.  Continuing to weigh your options, you noticed the way that Yoongi stared at you with his arms crossed over his chest and a raised eyebrow, almost as if he was challenging you to choose him.  You were too into this whole barely acknowledging his presence game to pick that route.  Finally, your eyes settled on an oblivious (or maybe nervous) Jungkook who was nursing a cup of beer in one hand and mindlessly staring down at his phone in the other.  Perfect.  Walking around Taehyung, you approached the younger boy and poked your finger into his side.  “Kookie, let’s kick some ass.” Out of the corner of your eye, you noted the way Yoongi’s eyes remained on you, but they became colder the moment those last words left your mouth.

“How daaaare you pick another partner?” Jimin scoffed, his eyes still closed as he wobbled to the side, catching his balance on the counter.  Oh boy.  God help whoever was stuck taking care of him tonight.

Jungkook’s eyes widened and his mouth fell into an ‘o’ as his eyes finally met yours, his fingers fumbling around his phone and almost causing it to fall.  “M-Me?” he questioned, his cheeks becoming rosier by the second.  “Are you sure?”

“Of course.” You smiled and wrapped your arm around his waist, resting your head against his arm fondly.  “I help you with your photography project, you help me maintain my pride.”

“O-Okay…” Jungkook’s arm stiffened in surprise at first, but he forced the nerves away and smiled warmly at you and hesitantly draped his arm over your shoulders.  As Namjoon and Hoseok led the way into the other room with the beer pong table, the younger boy guided the two of you behind them.  “Anything for you.”

Not only did the music drown out the sound of Jimin hurling into the kitchen sink, it also did a good job at masking the sound of Yoongi’s scoff and the way he immediately downed his full drink.

Despite Namjoon’s cocky attitude, you and Jungkook proved to be an unstoppable match, beating the other pair three games in a row.  The party proved to be a lot more fun than you had expected and would ever dare to give your friends credit for.  Shortly after you had started your first game of beer pong, the other friends and acquaintances of the boys started to file in.  It seemed like the guests never stopped arriving and those who came never wanted to leave.  Even after nearly three hours, the house was still quite full.  Although still quite tipsy, you found yourself hungry and tired, longing for your bed and a box of pizza.  Taehyung had suggested you just stay the night to avoid ubering back by yourself so late at night, but you were sick of the noise and mess.  Your social battery was quickly running out.

Sighing to yourself, you closed the front door of the house behind you and sat down on one of the front steps.  Staring off into the darkness, you started to plot your escape.  You didn’t want Taehyung or any of the other boys to worry about you too much, but you knew that they would immediately notice if you were gone for too long.

Before you could think too much, your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the front door opening and closing yet again.  Instead of watching the backs of another group of guests leaving, you felt somebody plop down beside you on the step.  As you looked to the side, your breath hitched in your throat.  “You good?” Yoongi asked, tired eyes searching your face.

God, if your social battery was already on low, you couldn’t even imagine how long ago Yoongi’s had run out.  You were shocked he had stayed nearly this long.  His tired eyes pleaded with yours, perhaps begging you to not make a fuss and just be civil with him for once.  Biting your lip, you nodded your head.  “Yeah, I’m fine,” you replied, looking off to stare into the street lights again.  “Just exhausted and in desperate need of some quiet and some food.”

“God, I feel you.  I think I’m going to have an eternal headache.” Yoongi chuckled to himself, letting out a deep breath as he ran a hand through his hair.  He seemed so… Calm.  So… Normal.  It was a bit jarring, but comforting at the same time.  “I don’t think you’re going to find any restaurant open right now, but I ordered pizza for dinner and have a lot left over at my place that I’m willing to share.  It’s also definitely quiet there.”  The words seemed to roll off of his lips so casually, as if this was something common for the two of you when it was anything but that.

Turning your head to look at him, you raised an eyebrow.  As you scanned his face, you couldn’t find any traces of disingenuity; it seemed as if he really intended to invite you over his place to hang out as if you were friends.  While this would have been intriguing on any normal day, it was extra intriguing with the bit of alcohol’s effects remaining in your body and your deep desire to leave the party.  Finally, you asked, “What’s the catch?”

“Hmm…” The corner of Yoongi’s lips perked up the slightest bit, his teeth digging into his tongue to prevent himself from laughing.  “The catch is you have to spend time with me.  I can see how that might be difficult for you, especially after you’ve spent the whole night avoiding me.”

Your eyes widened as you looked away, warmth flooding your cheeks.  You hadn’t actually expected him to notice the little game you were playing, at least in your head.  “I wasn’t avoiding you,” you immediately shot back, refusing to meet his eyes.  “I was just… Busy.”

“Ah, I know.  Very busy.  Crazy how you just seemed to disappear every time I tried to approach you,” Yoongi teased with a smirk playing at his lips, rising to his feet.  After stretching his arms over his head briefly, he turned to face you and extended his hand.  “So are you coming or not?  It’s only a five minute walk up the road, and I’d recommend you decide quickly before I rescind my offer.”

After staring at his offering hand for a moment, you sighed before grabbing onto it and allowing him to pull you up.  “Only for the pizza,” you retorted, although the small smile on your lips informed the both of you that that was far from true.  

Despite being perfectly capable of walking on your own, Yoongi’s hand remained wrapped around your own.  While you initially had some concerns that it would be awkward between the two of you, the conversation flowed naturally the entirety of the walk to his place.  Whether it be laughing about the random guy at the party who attempted to get with every single girl there or even poking fun at some of the freshmen in your history lecture, you had plenty to talk about.  Maybe it was the alcohol, but there seemed to be something deeper there.

After arriving at his place and noting the surprising cleanliness of it, the pair of you found yourselves sprawled out on his couch in the living room with two slices of heated up pizza a piece.  It was beyond relieving to finally have some peace and quiet, and the taste of the pizza was immaculate.  This was exactly what you needed.

Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Yoongi raised an eyebrow at you.  “Aren’t your boyfriends probably worried that you disappeared?”

Taking a big bite out of your crust, you rolled your eyes at the boy beside you and nudged his thigh with your foot.  “They’re not my boyfriends, and I already told them I left.”

“Hmm, interesting.” Yoongi smirked to himself and pushed your foot away from him.  “What about your little Kookie?”

“You’re awfully interested in my relationships with my friends,” you teased, leaning back further against one of the pillows and draping your feet over the armrest.  “We’re just friends.”

“Okay, okay.”  Yoongi chuckled and leaned forward to place his empty plate on the table in front of the couch.  Once he fell back against the couch, his eyes scanned your face.  A long silence fell upon you as he chewed on his lower lip, almost as if he was contemplating saying something.  When you opted to sit up straight again and positioned yourself a bit closer, he finally broke the silence.  “You know I never mean to hurt your feelings or offend you or anything like that, right?”

Swallowing the nervous lump that had formed in your throat, you stalled by busying yourself with putting your plate on top of his, wiping your hands against each other.  “I mean, I can see that now,” you admitted, allowing your eyes to meet his.  “But I never really know what to make of it all.”

Yoongi sighed to himself, looking down as he fiddled with his fingers.  You were glad to see that you weren’t the only nervous one here.  What had begun as a surprisingly fun and carefree hangout seemed to be morphing into something else very quickly.  If there hadn’t been any alcohol remaining in your system, you likely would’ve run from the tension.  Yet here you were, watching as Yoongi poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue.  “I’m just really bad at flirting, I guess.”

Your eyes widened as you allowed yourself to process what he had just admitted, staring at him as he attempted to look anywhere that wasn’t at you.  All of those little jabs and insults had been flirting?  Sure, you were aware that a lot of people used teasing to flirt, but that was usually after you had established some sort of foundation and it was made clear that that was the intention.  Either you had been overreacting all along, or he was right– he was really bad at this.  A jittery feeling filled your stomach as you looked down, occupying yourself by playing with the ends of a strand of your hair.  You hated yourself for still being so intrigued with him, but you couldn’t help it.  He truly was an enigma.  “You were… flirting?”

“Trying to, at least.” Yoongi let out an emotionless laugh, sounding rather disappointed in himself and likely a bit embarrassed.  After another moment, his eyes found yours.  Rather than look away, his eyes remained fixed on yours and a mesmerized look took over his face.  It was rather unclear whether it was a genuine newfound sense of confidence that spoke up next, or if it was the alcohol talking.  At that moment, something in him snapped.  “I just… You’re so fucking adorable and it really frustrates me because I just don’t know how to act around you for some reason.  I’d noticed you around campus before this semester but never really knew how to approach you.  When I saw you were in my class, I thought I finally had a shot, but I clearly fucked that up from day one.  Still don’t think I’ve even fully forgiven myself for making you cry.”  Letting out a huff, he leaned his head back on the pillow and stared up at the ceiling.  “Everything you do is just so fucking… Ugh.  How much a perfectionist you are, the short sundresses, the way you don’t even kind of realize the effect you have on people, it’s all just… Fuck.  I’m so used to just getting my way with people so easily, but it’s such a challenge with you.  I can’t decide if it’s more frustrating or alluring, but it doesn’t even matter.  You’re all I fucking think about these days.”

Swallowing thickly, your eyes scanned his face to search for any sign that he might be lying, but you found nothing.  Instead, he leaned back against the couch with his eyes closed, a hand raking itself through his hair.  He looked so… Frustrated.  Defeated.  You did this to the typically unbothered, confident Min Yoongi?  Biting your lip, your eyes trailed along his jawline and up to his lips.  Not only did he look discouraged, he looking so fucking… Good.  The apprehensive feeling that had taken over your stomach morphed into a pool of heat, slowly sinking lower and lower.  This was the Min Yoongi you had always imagined; a vulnerable, introspective boy who also happened to have a face that looked like it was sculpted by the gods themselves.  And here he was, confessing to you that you basically had him wrapped around your finger and at his will.  While this twist was certainly exciting, the feeling of dominance that came along with it had you feeling turned on.  You might not be good at words, but you certainly were good at communicating physically.

You hadn’t realized that you had completely zoned out until Yoongi was sitting up straight, panic in his eyes as he rapidly shook his head.  “I can’t believe I just said all of that… Forget it.  I’m sorry and I understand if you want to leave.”

Blinking a few times to snap yourself out of your daze, you shook your head at him.  Unable to find the right words, you rose to your knees and lunged forward, wrapping your arms around his neck and slamming your lips into his.  Instead of being met with the warmth and rhythm of his lips that you so craved, he pulled back a bit.

“Wait, are you sure?” he questioned genuinely, but his eyes became dark as they trailed down to your lips, longing to taste them again.  “I don’t want you to do something you might regret.”

“Yes, I’m sure about this and I’m also sure that you’re talking a whole lot.  It’s a bit much, don’t you think?” you teased, mocking the phrase he always used whenever he’d make fun of you in class.  Moving your hands up a bit, you tangled your fingers into the hair on the back of his head.  “You know, you probably should’ve led with some of that nicer stuff instead of being such an asshole.  Would’ve worked wonders for you much sooner.”

Yoongi’s entire demeanor seemed to shift as your words, a sense of relief washing over his face.  A smirk tugged at the corners of his lips as he finally wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you into his lap.  “I would’ve if you didn’t frustrate me so much.  Don’t know how to act around you.”  Finding his statement efficient enough for now, he at last closed the gap between the two of you, his lips slamming back onto yours.  His fingers slid up the back of your shirt and dug into your back, causing you to moan into his mouth.  The parting of your lips allowed him to slip his tongue into your mouth, the taste of him overwhelming you.  The pool of heat and desire in your stomach continued to sink down lower, becoming evident in the wetness in your panties that was soon going to become noticeable if your short skirt kept rising up.  Shifting yourself to straddle one of his thighs, you grinded down against it in an attempt to find some relief.

A groan from Yoongi caused you to pull back, taking a moment to catch your breath before you began to pepper wet kisses down his jawline.  You were too far in at this point and there was no turning back now.  As his hands slid down from your back to cup your ass, your lips found their way to his ear.  “How can I make it up to you?  You know, for frustrating you so much and all.”

Yoongi clenched his thigh in response to words, eliciting a moan out of you as the fabric of his jeans created friction against your wet panties.  “You’re playing a dangerous game asking questions like that.”

“Mmm, I think that’s what I’m trying to do,” you cooed, pecking his lips a couple times before kissing your way down to his neck.

“Bedroom.  Now.”  Before you could continue, he lifted you off of his lap and placed you on your feet on the ground.  He rose up beside you and wrapped his arm around your waist, quickly leading you out of the room and down the hall.  The moment he dragged you into his room, one of his hands departed from your body to slam the door shut and roughly press your body against the back of the door.  His lips roamed the skin on your neck for a few moments before his wandering hands abruptly tugged your shirt up and over your head, ignoring the way he forced your arms to twist.  Once the piece of clothing was discarded on the floor, his eyes fell upon your exposed skin, widening when he realized you had not been wearing a bra.  He took a step back, a combination of lust and what almost appeared to be admiration filling his eyes.  “God, are you trying to fucking kill me?”

Biting on your lower lip in an attempt to hide your growing smirk, you raised an eyebrow at him.  You could feel your ego being boosted and it was in that moment, just like that time a few days before during your run-in with him at Taehyung’s place, that you realized again just how much it got you off to feel in control over him.  After having dealt with him making fun of you and watching you unravel under his gaze so many times, it felt incredible to have him like putty in your hands.  It was clear by the dazed look in his eyes that he was at your command now, and this was finally a situation you felt comfortable taking control over.  “Don’t tell me you’re going to die on me already.  I haven’t even gotten started with you yet,” you teased, tracing your finger down his jawline at a tantalizingly slow pace.  “Take off your shirt.”

Yoongi’s eyes widened in surprise for a moment before he obliged to your command, quickly pulling his oversized t-shirt over his head and throwing it in a pile on top of yours.  It was obvious he had become accustomed to being the one holding power over you, and this shift had caught him off guard.  “A little bossy, don’t you think?”

“Get used to it.” Eyeing his bare chest and stomach slowly, you planted one last wet kiss onto his lips before dropping to your knees in front of him.  You ignored the way his eyes were practically bulging out of his head as you unhurriedly undid his belt and unbuttoned his jeans, dragging them down his legs and making sure to keep his boxers in place on his lips.  Despite his surprise, he eagerly stepped out of his jeans and kicked them to the side, a hand moving to rest on the top of your head.  Your mouth watered as you eyed the hardening bulge through his tight boxers that were already stained with pre-cum, leaning forward to just barely press your lips against the tip of his cock through the fabric.

Yoongi’s fingers threaded through your hair as a suffocated groan escaped his lips.  “Y-You know, I had planned on going down on you first.  It’s the least I could do.”

Ah, of course.  He was just as predictable as every other man you had slept with, and the point had been affirmed by all of your female friends you had discussed it with as well.  Let them go down on you first, they always said, knowing that if they did the job well, you would be a begging, submissive mess, hanging onto their every command for the rest of the night.  While there was nothing wrong with submitting sometimes, it just didn’t get you off quite as much as taking control did.  The stakes were even higher when the other person was Min Yoongi, who had just so graciously admitted to you earlier that he was so used to getting his way with people and feeling in control.  Despite your arousal, you couldn’t give him that satisfaction.  Not yet, at least.

“Mmm, no thanks,” you hummed nonchalantly, keeping your eyes on his as you used your teeth to grip onto the waistband of his boxers and slowly drag them down his legs.  Once you reached his ankles, you pulled back and took a moment to admire his fully hardened cock pressed against his stomach.  It was not the longest you had ever seen, but the girth of it had you clenching your thighs together at the thought of what it would feel like inside of you later.  Licking your lips, you grasped a hand around the base of his length and leaned forward, grazing your tongue against the head to lick up the pre-cum.

“Fuck,” Yoongi muttered under his breath, his other hand moving to tangle into your hair as well.  “I wouldn’t recommend too much teasing, sweetheart.  You’ll regret it later.”

Ah, already making threats in an attempt to feel in control.  This was going to be too easy.  You wanted him to beg, though.  Chuckling quietly to yourself, you locked eyes with him as you flattened your tongue against the back of the base of his cock, slowly licking your way up along the protruding vein until you reached the top again.  “Oh, no,” you teased, beginning to pump your hand up and down.  When your hand reached the top, you brushed your thumb back and forth over his sensitive tip.  “I’m so scared.”

Whimpering softly, Yoongi’s eyes screwed shut as he craned his neck back.  “Please, Y/N,” he groaned, giving your hair a rough tug.  “Need your mouth.  Now.  Please.”

There it was, the begging you had been waiting for.  All it took was a bit of teasing for the cocky Min Yoongi to lose all sense of pride.  “Well, I guess, since you asked so nicely.”  Smirking at your victory, you leaned forward and wrapped your mouth around the head of his cock.  Once you had hollowed out your cheeks enough to accommodate for his girth, you began to bob your head up and down and use one hand to pump the rest of his length that wasn’t in your mouth.

“F-Fuck, babe, just like that,” Yoongi groaned out from above you, trying his best to keep his eyes open despite the immense pleasure surging throughout his body.  Once you had adopted a rhythm after a couple of minutes, you removed your hand from the base of his shaft.  Yoongi immediately noticed its absence and moved a hand to the back of your head, slowly beginning to urge you forward further down his length.  “Fuck, you’re doing so well.”

Your eyes remained on his as you allowed him to slowly fuck your face, watering as you fought against the urge to gag.  The sound of his quiet moans of your name encouraged you further.  When you could tell he couldn’t take much more, you leaned forward to take the rest of his length in your mouth, bottoming out as your nose touched the skin on the bottom of his stomach.  Sucking in a deep breath through your nose, you swallowed gently around him, allowing his cock to feel the tightening of the muscles of your throat around it.

Yoongi released his loudest groan yet, eyes screwing shut as he shook his head. “F-Fuck, stop, stop,” he whimpered out, letting go of the back of your head.  “Don’t wanna cum before I even get to be inside of you.”

Fighting back the urge to smirk yet again, you slowly worked your mouth backwards until you released the tip of his cock with a loud ‘pop.’  Using the back of your hand to wipe the string of saliva that was hanging out of your mouth, you slowly rose to your feet to meet a flushed Yoongi.

Clearing his throat, he raised an expecting eyebrow at you.  “You know, I would like to return the favor first.”

“Hmm.” You couldn’t deny that your core was throbbing at this point, begging for any sort of release.  Still, your ego had you wanting to maintain the dominance you currently had over him.  Pressing a peck to his lips, you reached down to unbutton your skirt, shimmying it down your legs along with your soaked panties.  “Think I could sit on your face?”

For the umpteenth time that night, Yoongi’s eyes enlarged to the size of saucers as he looked you up and down.  It felt like an eternity that he stood there frozen and you could practically see a bubble above his head that read ‘Yoongi.exe has stopped working.’  When he at last realized his distraught state, he blinked rapidly and cursed beneath his breath before nodding.  “Uh, yeah… That works.”  God, he really was speechless.

You failed to suppress an amused laugh as he quickly made his way over to his unmade bed and laid on his back, his short-term flustered demeanor quickly being overtaken with a cocky smirk.  While this shift left you wanting to take control again, you couldn’t wait any longer at this point.  Sauntering over to the bed, you made your way onto your knees over his face as you faced his stomach, slowly lowering down until you hovered just above him.

Yoongi let out an amused chuckle, the release of warm air from his nose making your wet pussy throb.  “God, babe, you’re already soaked,” he mused, reaching his hands around and gripping them tightly around each of your thighs.  “You really got off that much just from sucking my cock, hmm?”

His words had you whimpering above him, gasping as he urged your body lower and barely ghosted his lips over your clit.  The need for power was gone for now.  You needed him to do something.  “P-Please.”

Another laugh had you clenching your thighs around his head, begging for any sort of friction.  “Come on, babe.  I bet you were feeling pretty good about yourself thinking you were in control, hmm?” His nails roughly dug down into the skin of your thighs.  “Please what?”

Letting out a frustrated huff, you closed your eyes tightly as you moved your hands up your body, wrapping around your breasts.  You knew you had to give in.  “Please fuck me with your tongue.  Anything, please,” you moaned out, pinching at your sensitive nipples to feel any sort of pleasure as you waited.

“Was that so difficult?  That’s all I needed to hear, babe,” he hummed from beneath you, reaching up to grab your hips and urge your body down lower under your pussy rested gently over his mouth.  Once he adjusted to the new position, he opened his mouth and slowly began to run his tongue along your folds.  It wasn’t until he received a few satisfactory moans from you that his tongue began to gently circle your clit, somehow hitting the spot right where you needed him.

“F-Fuck, Yoongi.  Right there,” you moaned out loudly, absentmindedly lowering yourself down a bit more to increase the friction.  Your eyes closed shut in pleasure as he replaced the circling motion with a soft sucking, a string of profanities leaving your mouth as you pinched your nipples harder.  God, it hadn’t even been long and you could already feel the knot in the pit of your stomach building, dying for that beautiful release.

After a few more moments, Yoongi urged your body up a bit so he could speak coherently.  “Come on, babe.  Be a good girl and fuck yourself on my tongue.”

A whimper escaped your mouth as you lowered yourself back down onto his now-flattened tongue.  Once you had applied the right amount of pressure, you slowly began to rock your hips back and forth.  At the top of each motion, his tongue managed to hit that perfect spot on your sensitive bud, bringing you closer to your orgasm with every jolt.  Yoongi could sense that you were getting close as your movements became sloppier, encouraging his nails to dig deeper into your thighs and hum against the lips of your pussy to increase the sense of friction.  This proved to be all too much for you and the pool of heat in your abdomen snapped moments later, your orgasm overtaking your body as you loudly moaned out Yoongi’s name.  The high was almost too much to handle; you were left seeing stars as Yoongi continued to fuck you with his tongue until you couldn’t take it anymore and moved off of his face with shaky thighs to collapse behind him.

Yoongi sat up quickly moments later, refusing to wipe your release off of his face as he marveled at your breathless form before him.  “Holy shit, that was so fucking hot,” he breathed out, and you swore you could see his cock twitch against his stomach.

When you finally fully came down from your high, you propped yourself up on your elbows to observe the wide-eyed man staring down at you. “Glad we were finally able to find something that mouth is good for.”  Your tongue poked out to skate over your lower lip as you admired the glistening of your release shamelessly left around his mouth and the head of his cock glowing an angry shade of red, just begging to experience the same release.  The mouth-watering sight had you aroused again at an embarrassingly fast pace, and it was only moments before you gripped onto his arm and roughly pulled his body on top of yours.

Yoongi’s mouth eagerly met yours, bringing you into a messy battle of teeth and tongues.  As he felt you attempt to buck your hips up into his, he began leaving a wet trail of kisses up your jawline until he was barely an inch from your ear.  “Think you’re ready to take my cock already?  God, you really are a needy, dirty slut, huh?”

His words had your clit throbbing and your body without any patience left.  You’re perceptive enough to know that he had been waiting even longer than you and likely couldn’t take waiting any longer either.  Reaching down between your bodies, you wrapped a hand around his shaft and guided it toward you, slowly rubbing the tip up and down your wet folds.

“F-Fuck,” Yoongi groaned out, eyes looking down to admire his cock against your clit before meeting your own.  “Want me to grab a condom first?”

Whimpering at the feeling of his tip brushing against your sensitive bud, you bit your lip.  “I’m clean and I’m on the pill.  It’s fine as long as you’re clean.”

“I’m clean too.” Yoongi nodded his head rapidly, reaching down to replace your hand with his own around his cock.  “Such a dirty slut wanting me to fuck you raw.”  Without any further warning, he placed the tip of his cock at your entrance and bucked his hips forward, slowly filling you with his length.

The sudden stretching of your walls caught you off guard, a loud gasp breezing through your lips as your head fell back against the pillow.  The initial shock of overstimulation washed away in an instant, a feeling of deep pleasure in the pit of your stomach replacing it as he slid all the way in.  When you realized he was remaining still, you opened your eyes and dug your nails into the skin on his back.  “Y-Yoongi, move.  Please.”

“G-God, so fucking tight and wet for me.” His forehead fell upon yours and he pressed a shockingly gentle kiss to your lips before propping himself up and beginning to thrust in and out of you at a rapid pace.  “Taking my cock so well.”

Whimpering quietly, you moved your legs to wrap around his lower waist and hoist your body closer to his, attempting to match his movements and feel him even deeper inside of you.  At the new angle, it wasn’t long until he adjusted his hips so the tip of his cock was pounding against your g-spot with every single thrust.  You knew you were not going to last long.  Without even realizing, you clenched your walls around him.  “F-Fuck, you feel so good.”

Yoongi let out a loud groan as he buried his face into your neck, his teeth clamping down on the exposed skin.  “Fuck, babe.  I’m not going to last if you keep doing that.”

It was almost as if his desperate words reignited the same fire for dominance you had been feeling earlier, suddenly recognizing the power you held over him.  Despite feeling quite close to orgasm yourself and enjoying the position you were in, you knew you’d get off even faster if you were to take control of the situation.  Tightening your legs around his waist, you used all of your strength to flip your body over so you were on top of him.  Pressing your hands against his chest, you pushed yourself up into a seated position, moaning loudly as his cock was able to fill you up even deeper in the new position.  “Mmm, that’s better.”

Yoongi initially looked at you in shock, but the moment that you sunk down his length, he threw his head back in pleasure.  “Fuck, what’s with you needing to be in control?” The clear implication of the question was that he was used to being the dominant one, and this switch was catching him off guard.  Regardless, he maintained his composure and propped his head up on the pillow, placing his hands on your hips as you began to bounce up and down.  “Yeah?  You like getting off by fucking yourself on my cock?”

Throwing your head back, you dragged your nails down his chest as you began to grind your hips in figure-eights, feeling that all-too-familiar warmth quickly building up in your stomach.  The sound of your skin slapping against his and echoing throughout the room only intensified your arousal, your hand moving to your clit in an attempt to reach your release sooner. “I-I’m close.”

“I’ve got it, babe,” Yoongi murmured, wetting his fingers against his tongue before pressing two of them against your clit and beginning to rub the sensitive area in small circles.  His breathing was quickly becoming as jagged as yours, his groans more frequent.  “C-Close, too.  W-Where?”

Although his question was quite vague and your mind was clouded from your orgasm that was quickly approaching, you understood what he was asking you.  Opening your eyes to meet his, you ground your hips against his harder.  “I-Inside me.  Please.”

“Fuck, that’s hot.  O-Okay.”

Yoongi’s fingers quickened in pace against your clit, his own hips lifting up off of the mattress to meet your thrusts.  The new sensation of fullness triggered your second orgasm, your eyes slamming shut as your walls pulsed and convulsed around his cock.  The feeling was even stronger than the first one, and although your mind was quite foggy, you’re sure that you were left practically screaming out his name as you desperately gripped onto his arms for any source of stability while you rode out your high.

After witnessing the euphoric look on your face and the feeling of your pussy clenching around his cock, Yoongi’s orgasm followed just moments later.  A loud groan escaped his lips as he sat up straight and wrapped his arms around you, his forehead resting against yours as the feeling of ecstasy flowed throughout his body.  The incoherent noises leaving his mouth continued as he pulsed hot streams of cum inside of you, filling you up completely as he tiredly lifted his hips a few more times to fuck it deeper inside of you.

When you were finally able to catch your breath and the tingling sensation left your body, you opened your eyes and were surprised with his closeness when you realized that his forehead was resting against yours.  Something about the position felt so intimate to you, and despite having just been fucked senselessly by the man in front of you, you were left suddenly feeling a bit… Shy.  Maybe it was the last remnants of the alcohol wearing off or maybe it was the fact that you had just come crashing down from one of the best orgasms you had ever experienced, but you suddenly felt so vulnerable in front of no one other than Min Yoongi.  Chewing on your bottom lip, you slowly lifted your weight off of him and collapsed down beside him, throwing an arm over your eyes as you let out an exhausted yawn.  You knew you were good at sex.  What you were not so good at was what usually came after it; the uncomfortable conversations and trying to figure out whether or not the other person wanted you to stay or go.  The tension that had existed between the two of you before all of this had occurred left you even more on edge.

Yoongi fell back next to you moments later, a huff escaping his lips as his head hit the pillow.  Although your arm was covering your eyes, you could feel his eyes glued to your face.  “Wow, what the fuck was that?  Not what I had imagined you being like,” he exhaled, and you could feel his weight shifting closer to your body.  “I’m so used to being in complete control… Didn’t expect to like it so much when it’s not like that.”

Smiling to yourself at your victory, you allowed your arm to fall away from your face, opening your eyes to meet his. “You live and you learn.”

A shockingly warm smile overtook Yoongi’s features as his eyes trailed down your body, stopping when they reached your thighs.  Suddenly, he sat up straight before pushing himself off of the bed and getting onto his feet.  “Fuck, sorry.  I’m gonna get you a towel to clean up.”

“No worries.” You offered him a reassuring smile, sitting up as you watched him disappear out of the room.  Once he was gone, you exhaled a deep breath you hadn’t even realized you were holding in.  His question was valid: What the fuck was that?  Your mind wandered back to the heated conversation you were having before throwing yourselves at each other, trying to recall the confession he had made to you.  The post-sex dreariness was setting in and you were finding it difficult to recollect just what he had said and what the implications behind it were.  You remembered him saying something about how you were all he could think about, but that likely just meant he was physically attracted to you, right?  Had you wanted him to mean more than that?  The pit growing in your stomach suggested that perhaps you did, and perhaps you should get out of there before you got too upset about it.  It would make sense if it was only for sex to him, especially since you were aware of his past and how he was used to getting his way with girls.  You needed to get out of there before it became more than just sex to you too.

Your eyes wandered over the edge of the bed, spotting your top within reaching distance from where you were.  Right as you were about to reach down to grab it, Yoongi barged back into the room.  He was now clothed in an oversized t-shirt and a fresh pair of boxers.

“Sorry for the wait, but I got you a towel fresh out of the dryer.”  He lingered in the doorway for a moment, eyeing you curiously for a moment before shutting the door behind him.  “Also brought you some sweats and a t-shirt to sleep in.  A hoodie, too.  Wasn’t really sure what you’d want so I kind of brought a little bit of everything.” His eyes avoided yours as he reached up to rub the back of his neck. “You can also shower if you want, but I figured you’d be tired and could just do it in the morning.”

You blinked a few times as you studied his oddly nervous demeanor, taking in the meaning behind his words.  He had wanted you to stay?  Was he just being respectful, or did he really want you there?  Reaching forward to grab the towel he left on the edge of the bed, you looked down as you started to clean yourself up.  “Oh, I didn’t know you wanted me to stay…”

Yoongi remained silent for a few moments, his eyes finally falling upon your face as he sat down on the edge of the bed.  “Huh?  Why wouldn’t I want that?”  There was genuine confusion laced into his voice as he anxiously tapped his hands against his lap.  “Wait, I did tell you I was interested in you earlier, right?  I… I was nervous so I wouldn’t be surprised if it came out the wrong way.  I tend to do that a lot around you, apparently.” A jittery chuckle escaped his lips as he looked down at his lap.

An excited rush burst throughout your stomach, a smile threatening to spread across your lips as you finally allowed yourself to look at his distraught form.  You were feeling hopeful, but you needed to make sure.  “I mean, you said something along the lines of being attracted to me and wanting to get to know me, or something like that…” You were well aware that such probing was only going to make him more nervous, but you needed to hear him say it.

“Ah, right.  I’m seeing now how that’s kind of vague.”  His cheeks were flushed bright red, but he finally allowed his eyes to meet yours.  It was like the cocky, vocal Yoongi you had just experienced fifteen minutes prior and the smol bean hunched over beside you were two completely different people.  Offering you a shy smile, he rested a gentle hand on top of your thigh.  “I like you.  I really do want to get to know you better.  I’m sorry we did this, uh, kind of backwards.” His free hand reached up to rake through his disheveled hair.  “But I was thinking that maybe tomorrow we could study for our history test during the day and after that, there’s this nice new restaurant that just opened down the street that I was, uh, thinking about taking you to.  You know, only if you want, though.”

It was nice to see Yoongi let his guard down, and it was even nicer to know that you were the cause of it.  Smiling to yourself, you grabbed the sweatpants and hoodie he had left on the edge of the bed, moving the dirty towel to the side as you began to dress yourself in his clothes.  Your head lingered for a few moments in the hoodie before pulling it over your head, inhaling the scent of his laundry detergent and cologne.  While you did appreciate his openness and his confession left you feeling quite jumpy, you knew you couldn’t turn down an opportunity to tease him even further.  “Oh, so now you’re just using me for my notes, huh?”

Yoongi’s face fell as you spoke, but the moment he noticed the teasing smirk spread across your lips, he rolled his eyes and shoved your shoulder.  “Just because I’m not as neat doesn’t mean I’m not as diligent.”  Scooching his body over until he was beside you, he shook his head as he pulled a blanket over both of your laps.  “You know, I don’t appreciate the teasing when I’m trying to be vulnerable here.”

Giggling to yourself, you leaned back until your head hit the pillow.  Pulling him down beside you, you rested a hand on his cheek.  “I can agree to all of your plans under one condition.”

Raising a curious eyebrow, Yoongi moved his body closer to yours and draped a leg over both of yours.  It was clear he was quickly becoming comfortable again.  “And what might that be?”

Running your finger along his jawline, a small smirk stretched across your lips.  “We go for round two first thing tomorrow morning.”

Yoongi appeared to be caught off guard at first, but it wasn’t long until he was laughing along with you. “God, you really are a bit much.” His tongue swiped over his lower lip as he appeared to think to himself.  “I can also agree to that under one condition.”

Your finger stopped moving along his face as you tilted your head to the side.  “Oh yeah?  What?”

Smirking at you, Yoongi’s hand trailed down your back before he gave your ass a playful squeeze.  “Before the semester ends, you promise me that we break into our lecture hall one night and you let me fuck you over the table while you wear that yellow sundress.”

“God, how long have you been fantasizing that one for?”  The mischievous look spread across his face told you all you needed to know.  Laughing loudly as you closed your eyes, you snuggled your face into his chest, quickly becoming accustomed to viewing his warmth as a source of comfort.  

“Deal.”

[enbyboiwonder]

Over the past couple days, I’ve read all that’s available of Blue Period, and I adore Yotasuke-kun. And I ended up relating to him way more than I thought.

He’s the kind of person who’s always been shoved into boxes by those around him. He draws something that’s well above the expected skill level of a kid his age, and his mother makes him keep drawing, so it ends up that he’s drawing all the time, so he obviously likes drawing! No, he only does it because she tells him to. He wears plaid all the time not because he likes it because that’s what his mother buys him. She says that he wouldn’t be able to function without her because she does everything for him including buying his clothes, but she’s never once even given him the freedom to try! She just goes out and buys them on her own, and she buys whatever she likes without bothering to find out what he does. She says she let him decorate the entryway with his artwork, but even that’s just things she wants, not him. And at college, especially with that cat sensei? It’s obvious that Yotasuke-kun is that one diamond that she cares about polishing, but she looked at his skill and decided all on her own what shape he should be. She doesn’t care one whit what he likes and wants to do. They see him as an object to manipulate how they will, not an actual person with his own thoughts and wishes and feelings whom they can help grow into his best version of himself.

I don’t know if hard work is a skill, but it’s certainly an ability. Yatora definitely has that ability. If someone tried to put him in a box, he’d be able to resist or break out. But Yotasuke-kun doesn’t, not to that extent. Especially when you’ve got someone (or multiple someones) actively trying to put you and keep you in that box, it’s really fucking difficult and exhausting to fight against that. Especially when those people are your teacher and your own fucking mother. Without that ability to work hard, all he’s left with is the ability to go along with what’s expected of him. He was able to stop going to cram school where he felt they were only teaching him how to make exam art because cram school was only something he could do, not that he was expected to. But everything else? Without a support system, the only thing he can do is to keep going along with what others want of him unhappily.

He never really liked drawing before, but he seemed happy drawing those rabbits. And of course his teacher was extremely unsupportive of that, because her ideal diamond isn’t one that paints animals. But maybe Yotasuke-kun’s best self is one who does.

When he painted that rabbit alone in a cage, I think something inside me broke a little bit, because that... that’s him.

I want to protect him so badly. Yatora cares about him, and though he’s said those same types of things to him before, it wasn’t out of any sort of ill will, it was because he didn’t know any better, but unlike a lot of people, he is willing to learn. I hope he is able to learn and become (at least part of) that support system that Yotasuke-kun needs in order to become who he wants to be. Man, I’m gonna cry if he ends up stuck in that box for the rest of his life.

[ladyvolcanolauncher]

Encanto Wands part 4

I've decided to put Luisa among the youngest because Antonio's to young for me to think the results will be accurate.

Luisa Madrigal

Vine wood with a unicorn hair core, 13 ¼ and rigid flexibility

Vine

The druids considered anything with a woody stem as a tree, and vine makes wands of such a special nature that I have been happy to continue their ancient tradition. Vine wands are among the less common types, and I have been intrigued to notice that their owners are nearly always those witches or wizards who seek a greater purpose, who have a vision beyond the ordinary and who frequently astound those who think they know them best. Vine wands seem strongly attracted by personalities with hidden depths, and I have found them more sensitive than any other when it comes to instantly detecting a prospective match. Reliable sources claim that these wands can emit magical effects upon the mere entrance into their room of a suitable owner, and I have twice observed the phenomenon in my own shop.

Unicorn

Unicorn hair generally produces the most consistent magic, and is least subject to fluctuations and blockages. Wands with unicorn cores are generally the most difficult to turn to the Dark Arts. They are the most faithful of all wands, and usually remain strongly attached to their first owner, irrespective of whether he or she was an accomplished witch or wizard.

Minor disadvantages of unicorn hair are that they do not make the most powerful wands (although the wand wood may compensate) and that they are prone to melancholy if seriously mishandled, meaning that the hair may ‘die’ and need replacing.

Camilo Madrigal

Ash wood with a dragon heartstring core, 14 ¼ and quite bendy flexibility

Ash

The ash wand cleaves to its one true master and ought not to be passed on or gifted from the original owner, because it will lose power and skill. This tendency is extreme if the core is of unicorn. Old superstitions regarding wands rarely bear close examination, but I find that the old rhyme regarding rowan, chestnut, ash and hazel wands (rowan gossips, chestnut drones, ash is stubborn, hazel moans) contains a small nugget of truth. Those witches and wizards best suited to ash wands are not, in my experience, lightly swayed from their beliefs or purposes. However, the brash or over-confident witch or wizard, who often insists on trying wands of this prestigious wood, will be disappointed by its effects. The ideal owner may be stubborn, and will certainly be courageous, but never crass or arrogant.

Dragon

As a rule, dragon heartstrings produce wands with the most power, and which are capable of the most flamboyant spells. Dragon wands tend to learn more quickly than other types. While they can change allegiance if won from their original master, they always bond strongly with the current owner.

The dragon wand tends to be easiest to turn to the Dark Arts, though it will not incline that way of its own accord. It is also the most prone of the three cores to accidents, being somewhat temperamental.

Mirabel Madrigal

Apple wood with a unicorn hair core, 11 and solid flexibility

Apple

Applewood wands are not made in great numbers. They are powerful and best suited to an owner of high aims and ideals, as this wood mixes poorly with Dark magic. It is said that the possessor of an apple wand will be well-loved and long-lived, and I have often noticed that customers of great personal charm find their perfect match in an applewood wand. An unusual ability to converse with other magical beings in their native tongues is often found among apple wand owners, who include the celebrated author of Merpeople: A Comprehensive Guide to Their Language and Customs, Dylan Marwood.

Unicorn

Unicorn hair generally produces the most consistent magic, and is least subject to fluctuations and blockages. Wands with unicorn cores are generally the most difficult to turn to the Dark Arts. They are the most faithful of all wands, and usually remain strongly attached to their first owner, irrespective of whether he or she was an accomplished witch or wizard.

Minor disadvantages of unicorn hair are that they do not make the most powerful wands (although the wand wood may compensate) and that they are prone to melancholy if seriously mishandled, meaning that the hair may ‘die’ and need replacing.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

[floralovebot]

Helia and Tecna friendship headcanons? -lambofzenith

AHHHHHHHHHH okay so

helia is really bad at technology right? pretty much anything that isn't covered in red fountain lessons, he's a complete no-go at. tecna takes it upon herself to try and help him understand basic technology a bit more and it goes so wrong. helia is literally the mom that squints their eyes and holds their phone away from their face while using One pointer finger to type everything. tecna hates it so much.

helia naturally doesn't understand a single thing that comes out of her mouth when she's talking technology but he still supports her nonetheless

helia is surprisingly rational most of the time! he's a firm Push All My Emotions Down And Then One Day I'll Die kind of person so even during really stressful missions, he's good at keeping a level head about things. tecna really appreciates this and it's not rare to see her, helia, and timmy discussing mission-related strategies During The Middle Of A Fight

tecna has a tendency to talk while she works (only noticeable around people she's comfortable with though) but she gets a little self-conscious about it. she knows it's not Bad or anything, but it doesn't seem Right either so she tries to keep quiet most of the time. helia on the other hand is so used to working while it's noisy that he's totally chill with it. they've gotten used to just vibing in the same room, working on their own things, and not actually talking to each other during it. they're comfortable around each other :) helia doesn't mind when she rambles out loud and tecna doesn't mind him pacing around the room every five minutes. symbiotic relationship.

tecna doesn't like talking about what she went through in the omega dimension, even with timmy. however, she does occasionally draw things out when she really needs to vent and can't think of any other way how. she's always been good at sketching due to her background in designing gadgets so this wasn't a weird transition for her. helia told her about this anonymous place for artists to submit their art with absolutely no names attached and after checking to make sure it was legit and she was completely safe, she started to submit one or two a year. she doesn't like to do it often but it does help to sort of "get it out" without actually talking about it.

while helia is notoriously Bad at video games, he does actually like the more "physical reality" ones (think that virtual reality tecmy scene!) mainly because it feels close enough to real life that he doesn't need to rely on just technology to do it. tecna and helia often have very competitive gaming matches but specifically within those kinds of games otherwise, he's really bad at it and she gets annoyed that he can't remember any of the buttons.

speaking of competitions, helia has an inner bet going on of How Much Can I Pretend To Not Know Jackshit About A Specific Technological Topic Before Tecna Notices. what he doesn't know, is that tecna knows he does this and has her own inner bet of How Long Can I Explain This Specific Topic Before Helia Gets Bored And Moves On. so far, the score is mostly even, with helia only winning because timmy isn't aware of this mental battle and will often jump in to explain things too. helia is very smug about this and tecna can't say anything to timmy otherwise she loses the fight that no one actually set firm rules on.

timmy is just really happy that his two best friends are also friends and sometimes he tries to invite helia and flora on their dates. tecna is okay with this only because she thinks it's funny. florelia were also okay with it but started to not be because they realized that their version of a date and tecmy's version of a date was extremely different. they've started to come up with increasingly ridiculous excuses for why they can't go and so far timmy is the only one that hasn't noticed. poor timmy, he genuinely thinks flora's best friend cactus is sick and needs care 😔

when timmy isn't available, helia will call tecna for any technology related issues he's having. on one hand, she likes that he trusts her and can rely on her, on the other hand, she's told him ten separate times not to leave his computer running all the damn time. (tecna: please turn the computer off when you're not using it. this will immensely help solve all of the problems you've been having. helia: okay so i'm gonna leave it on all the time?). he's not trying to be difficult though. he just forgets everything and assumes it should work regardless (he a little stupit).

roxy gets so much gender envy from both of them and it confuses her all the time. they have no idea what a gender envy is though and they're mostly just wondering how they stop giving it to roxy since it seems like it agitates her??? help please???? researching the matter doesn't help and it ends up becoming a meme on winx stan twt because tecna made a very official and serious post asking about the severity of "gender envy" and needing to know how contagious it is. now whenever either of them posts, earth teens just comment gender envy at them. helia still doesn't know what it means.

they don't watch movies/tv together but they will binge-watch the same shows and then talk about them later on. tecna's formatting is still very formal and functional meanwhile helia bounces off multiple points and forgets to make a conclusion. he stresses her out so much.

helia notices when tecna has stayed up too long for too many nights and will occasionally send her a "please sleep" message when he knows timmy is already asleep and can't do it. she doesn't always listen but sometimes she will, but not before sending the same message back because why the fuck is he up at this hour huh dumbass?????

tecna has a pet bird and helia has multiple cats and they absolutely cannot be in the same room together. her bird is constantly trying to fight his cats and while they're usually well behaved, he's genuinely scared they're gonna try to eat it (tecna: stop calling my bird an "it"; helia: stop putting your bird near my cats 😐)

they actually don't like hanging out when one of them is upset. they both have a hard time talking about their emotions (for different reasons obviously) and they always end up feeling like they have to say something when they're together. they just really prefer hanging when they're both in a good mood or at least calm. whenever one of them gets upset, they stop hanging out together until that person feels better.

connected to the last point, you'd think that would mean they don't know a lot about each other, but they surprisingly do! they're both relatively observant people (tecna gets better every year) and they're actually really good at figuring out why the other is upset and what would help. they just don't talk about it.

although, on a similar note, the one time they did have an emotional talk, it was about timmy. tecna was feeling upset again and worrying over whether or not she's "too logical/not emotional enough" and it was the one time where she actually allowed herself to hang out with him while being upset. they had a genuine heart to heart about things and especially about how she's way too hard on herself. they thought it would be awkward since they actively avoided this kind of thing but it wasn't! it went very naturally and helia even teared up a bit. he's very proud of her and the effort she makes every day and since that talk has been much more vocal about it.

when they went to earth in s4, they both spent way too much time learning about Earth Things; tecna about earth media (canon), and helia about animals since that's what flora was talking about. he started calling tecna "chip" after that because chipmunks reminded him of her. she disagrees with this assessment and he refuses to admit he mixed up chipmunks and squirrels. he still calls her chip to this day, and fortunately, it's grown on her. unfortunately, he calls timmy "chip" too, and now it's a hassle to figure out who he's talking to.

helia is surprisingly interested in zenith technology despite not understanding it all! he enjoys walking through the streets of zenith with tecna while she proudly points things out so he can go "ooo aaa" at everything. sometimes she tries to explain how things work and his mind starts playing elevator music automatically. tecna has gotten really good at knowing when helia is just. brain empty no thoughts because she recognizes the Empty look in his eyes. she enjoys catching it live and trying to figure out why he's just. not thinking (usually it's because he either doesn't understand something or got bored) (this happens often when sky starts talking) (sorry sky)

tecna is one of the winx (besides flora of course) that helia trusts the most. not in an emotional or friend way, but in a physical, we're on a mission way. she has good control of her magic and knows how to use it. she's good at thinking of strategies and applying them properly to the situation. and after the omega dimension, he had a newfound respect for her previously unknown to him survival skills. if he were even in severe danger, she would be the first winx he'd call (depending on the situation, she is occasionally ahead of flora).

helia is really bad at sharing details. he tends to go straight to the conclusion but doesn't share how he got there (adhd king 😌) and tecna is the best person to call in when this happens. her logical questioning makes it seem so easy because she has the patience and knowledge to connect the dots and ask the right questions. when anyone else tries its more like (helia: i'm sitting in a pool of blood; person: uhm do you know where it's coming from?; helia: probably the stab wound; someone: did you get stabbed??; helia: oh yeah definitely.)

[decaffeinatedartisthug]

Pro-tips for baby artists

At the beginning of your artistic journey, everything feels confusing. You just have a colossal amount of ideas but you don’t know how to put them down. It doesn’t matter if you’re a painter or a digital artist, the question is still the same: “why does it have to be so damn difficult?!” On one hand, this question proves that you are maturing, as most baby artists tend to - and it’s perfectly normal! - feel like they are doing everything correctly, to ralise at the end that their ideas might be too many and too unorganised. 

On the other, this problem can be resolved in various ways, that most artists learn with experience, but that I want to share with you in this post. 

1. References, not copies: What I used to do, and I see a lot of baby artists making the same mistake as me, is basically coping others’ art. With this, I’m not saying that you can’t use references or you mustn’t do “draw in your artstyle” challenges, as it’s VERY important that artists know that references are important, photos and art pieces both. What I want to say, is that taking an artwork and completely coping every single detail in it blocks your creativity and your ability to follow anatomic structures in a real references. Using others’ artwork helps you when you “steal” from the other artist some techniques, like how they colour, how they draw bodies, or what kind of references they use.

2. Instagram account: if you are a beginner artist who was born in the internet era, one of the first things that come to your mind when you start improving with your artistic skills, is that you have to open an Instagram account where you post your art pieces. Sometimes, this helps artists to stay committed to their passion, but most of the time the result is the opposite. When you are in the first stages to become an artist, you have the possibility to be creative and do what you want with your art. If your sketchbook isn’t “aesthetically pleasing” it doesn’t matter, as only you and your friends are going to see it! You can experiment with new artforms and artstyles without judgement or deadlines. Now, I don’t want to say that opening an online art account ruins this, but having an art account certantly requires very thick skin  - as we all know that on the internet people feel like they always know best - and costant care and precision, which sometimes dulls the positivity that making art normally brings. 

3. Art supplies: One of the most popular phrases used by creators is “the art supply doesn’t make the artist”, which is completely true, but not quite accurate. Expensive art supplies won’t make your art any better, and they won’t make your work any easier, but using correct art supplies is very important. Spending 200$ for an art supply that you won’t be using is not worth it (a.k.a. me with brandy oil pastels that I refuse to use because it’s too difficult), but buying some, for example, inking pens at a fair price will help you improve. You have to experiment to know what works out for you or not, so using only a normal pencil won’t help you with your sperimentation and, automatically, your artistic growth. So spend money, but spend it with conscience.

4. OCs: If you don’t know, OC stands for Original Character, and it’s a common thing between a lot of artist to create an OC with their own personalities. Here’s my tip on them: USE THEM. They are extremely helpful for your creativity and for your anatomic studies. An OC provides the perfect opportunity to draw and learn through something you enjoy. By drawing the OC, your art skills will improve with ease, as you will be drawing them in different situations, expressions and poses. Apart from this, even only the part of the conception of the character will help you to organize and choose your ideas!

5. Experiment: As a beginner artist, I always thought that when you begin your artistic journey, you have to be sure of what “type” of artist you are going to be. Guess what? I was wrong, so very wrong. Let your curiosity get the best out of you: you want to give sculpting a try? Go for it! You want to pass to digital art instead of traditional? Awsome! Art is expressed in millions of forms, you just have to descover what you like best, but to find them, you have to try as many as possible. It doesn’t matter if you fail: it’s normal. Errors make the journey more interesting, and they make you want to be better the next time!