#mcu avengers

[brainrotcharacters]

It's hilarious how the visceral adoration Wade felt for Captain America was equaled only by the visceral hatred he felt for Johnny Storm

[asherashedwings]

This is how the first Avengers went, right?

[mischievous-thunder]

Wade's inability to keep his sinful thoughts in check

[thewrittenpodcast]

Principal: unfortunately we had to call your mother in

Peter: may won't pick up

Principal: no not your aunt. your mother

Peter: i don't... have one?

Principal: says here one Viginia Potts is listed

Peter: i have never met a virginia in my life

Pepper, walking in: i was called

Peter:

Peter: your name is virginia?

Peter: my life is a lie

Peter: how can I go on

[squilfmybeloved]

at new years the avengers compile a video of this year's most embarrassing moments into like a vine compilation with vine music and little typed captions and everything😭

notable moments:

- peter getting chased by a lizard man on all fours in a queens sewer. screaming can be heard behind looney toons music

- clint falling into a giant christmas tree in new york square and hanging there like a cat

- bucky trying to pull his hair up and alpine the cat, assuming hand movement means playtime, fucking LAUNCHES at him like a missile. all you see before the video cuts is a blurry image of bucky and alpine falling. there's a cut off scream

- tony and rhodey drunk fighting in their suits at a party. it's so horrendously fucking embarrassing it makes top #1 most embarrassing tony moment

- kate trying her first window jump LMAOO

- bruce and tony's "you're embarrassing me in front of the wizards 🫤"

- t'challa getting knocked back by his own suit, courtesy of shuri

- kate and yelena's fight,, thing. it was concepts of a fight

- nat being so cool awesome girlboss in a battle then it cuts to her tripping on the stairs in too long pajama pants

- bucky and sam just. laying there. on the floor after peter webs them up. they look hilariously pathetic

- steve's psas. i feel like no more needs to be said on that

- thor's whole aether stone speech

- loki getting humbled to HELL by hulk

- thor and loki doing get help. top tier sibling dumbassery, something me and my brother would do

- wanda accepting a smoothie from dumE after multiple warnings from tony bcs she feels bad. it was in fact motor oil. video cuts off to vine scene "why is it spicy"

alr that's it 👍 add on if ye so wishes

[1004bats]

just put myself through captain america: civil war. It was so bad I had to watch an episode of avengers assemble to level out all that sad and disappointment.

[fawkes12]

For a fandom to register as a hyperfixation of mine they must turn into ponies

I'll make another post showing their markings and the uh ? Layers? Idk, yeah. Blah

[honeeysagee]

Long Night?

once again, i'm missing soft!steve. sue me! here's a little context. warnings: very touch depraved Steve, fluff

summary: 𝘪𝘵’𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘢𝘺 — 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘦𝘭𝘥𝘴, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘯, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘷𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘭 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘞𝘢𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘰𝘯. 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘢 𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵—𝘩𝘦 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶.

The screen door creaks and slams, but you don't flinch. You hear him before you see him - boots off, footsteps slow and heavy, shirt already discared and slung over one shouler. You swear he's gotten bigger since you've been staying over these last few weeks.

He smells like the day: sun, hay, sweat, and earth. The kind of scent that sink into your and stays.

Steve pauses in the doorway, catching his breath, eyes meeting yours with a softness that speaks volumes. Without a word, he moves toward the kitchen, the familiar rhythm of his movements grounding you.

You watch as he fills the kettle, sets it on the stove, then leans against the counter.

"Long day?" You asks, while wearing his shirt and typing away on some report you barely had interest in. No, you were distracted by the 6'2 sweating mess that just stalked through the house.

Steve glances over, water pooling at the corner of his gaze. "Yeah," He says, voice low and measured. "They called again today."

You stop typing, "Government?" You prompted gently.

He nods, a tired exhale fills the room entirely. "That 'New Avenger' nonsense. They want me to lead. Be the symbol again," He picks up the kettle, no mitten. That's your man right there. "I already told them. I'm not Captain America anymore. Sam is. I don't even know why Bucky agreed to that."

He pours the tea in the mug, lifts it towards you. "I need this." He murmurs - cradling the mug and enjoying the warmth. Slowly, he makes his way to the sofa then spreads his legs far apart until he's comfortable. Yet, you also knew it was an invitation.

You notice his fingers twitch, restless, thumb brushing the empty space beside him almost desperately.

You wait.

"Bunny, lap." Steve demands so softly - you thought he asked first, but you knew better. Since reconnecting, he's been a little demanding and needy with touch, but you didn't mind.

You set your laptop aside and slide onto his lap. He breathes out a shaky sigh, arms easing around your waist, fingers pressing into fabric like he’s anchoring himself to something real.

You rest your head against his shoulder, and he loosens the tension in his neck, pressing forward just enough to deepen the contact.

He breathes in, slower now, each exhale softer than the last—letting the quiet evening fill the space between you. Then your lips brush the side of his neck, softly, a tender question in the warmth of the moment.

Steve stills for a heartbeat, then wraps his arms around you tighter, one hand gently tilting your head so he can press a careful, slow kiss just behind your ear. The movement is gentle, as if he’s rediscovering the meaning of touch.

His lips trace small, feather-light kisses along the nape of your neck. Each one is deliberate—silent, loving. He murmurs your nickname into the quiet, murmurs that linger like a secret: “Bunny.”

The world beyond the sofa—fields, obligations, expectations—fades. There’s just this: soft lips, the scent of earth and tea, the warmth of Steve’s arms, and the unspoken promise that here, tonight, touch is enough.

[fandomismylife]

Tony: thats my boy!

Peter: *falls to the ground because of a stab wound he was actively hiding*

Tony: no, my boy!

[ynscrazylife]

THE BAT IN THE SHADOWS 🦇🕸️

— CHAPTER TWO

Summary: Bruce Wayne is the happiest he’s ever been in a while. He has a beautiful wife, amazing children, and is stopping crime left and right as Batman. All that shatters when you, his wife, mysteriously disappears.

Pairings: Bruce Wayne x Wife!Reader, Batfamily x Batman!Reader, Avengers x Reader (Platonic)

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Having to wait until morning to pull the security cam footage from nearby stores was hell. In the meantime, Bruce filled out a missing persons report (and nearly broke down whilst doing it). The worst part of it all was having to come home, alone, and face his family.

His kids and Alfred were exactly where he left them, all in the living room.

“Where’s Mom?” Dick was the first to ask, arms crossed. Neither he nor his brothers could hide the worry flickering across his face. Not even Alfred, who was usually so composed.

“I believe,” Bruce began, wanting to be strong for them. The image of your smiling face flashed in his mind and he slammed his hand against the nearby wall to steady himself. Get it together, he told himself. The weight of your shattered phone in his pocket felt like tons of bricks. “She’s been taken.”

He hated that that was all he could say on it. That was all he knew. He hated that he had to say it at all.

Five rounds of “What?!” echoed around the room. Bruce forced himself to look at Dick, Jason, Tim, and Damian. At their pain. Their shock.

“I only found her phone, broken. But we will bring her home,” Bruce said, knowing that there was no keeping his children out of this investigation. “I will take the lead. I’m going to go downstairs and start working. Anyone is free to join me, but I’d also suggest trying to sleep. If you can.”

He started towards the stairs. Then, half-way there, he stopped and turned around, opening up his arms. It took a second, but the boys came to him, and Bruce tucked them in his arms with a strong, tight hug. Alfred watched for a moment, then walked around and put his hand on Bruce’s shoulder.

“We will find her,” Bruce vowed.

And, he thought, if you were harmed in anyway, if a single hair was out of place, he’d destroy whoever had enough nerve to do this.

//

Standing by Commissioner Gordon’s side, Bruce peered over the employee sitting at his desk, who was starting up the footage on his computer. They found the closest store to the spot where your phone was found and as soon as the sign switched from closed to open, they walked in.

“Here you go,” the employee murmured, pressing play.

The footage was grainy and dark but with narrowed eyes, Bruce was determined to take in all that he could. As soon as you walked into frame, Bruce couldn’t help but tense up, nervous about what they were going to see.

Your pace started slowing as you took out your phone. Then, a jolt of electricity — where it was coming from was off-screen — hit your in the back. Bruce fixed his jaw, trying not to lash out or yell or even cry as he saw you fall. The thought of you, limp on the hard, dirty sidewalk . . .

Then, two figures came into frame, lean builds and wearing all black. Bruce watched how one stomped on your phone screen and he took a breath. They were saying something to each other, but the footage didn’t have audio. It was impossible to make out. He curled his fingers into a fist when they each took one of your arms, starting to drag you away. They didn’t seem to care at all that your head was bouncing off the ground and Bruce wanted to smash the screen.

He’d make them fucking pay, that was for sure.

Gordon did the talking, thanking the employee and whatnot. Bruce was in a daze, the footage playing over and over again in his head. He hadn’t even realized that Gordon wrapped up the conversation until he was pulled outside. They went a few stores down, trying to find more security camera footage of where they took you.

When they did, Gordon and Bruce watched as the kidnappers haphazardly tossed you into the car. As if you were nothing. As if you weren’t the most precious thing in Bruce’s life. He made fists again. They drove away and the one good thing was that the footage captured the license plate.

Gordon drove them to the police station and Bruce practically forced him to speed. A goddamn license plate, that was their only clue. Bruce’s only hope. He was pacing back and forth while the police actually ran the plate, never staying still for even a millisecond.

Finally, Gordon emerged. “They must’ve stolen the car. We’ll start sending patrol units out, contact other local departments . . . We will find this car. We’ll find them,” he said confidently.

//

While patrol units drove all around the city and beyond, Bruce did the same in his Batmobile. He spent every minute of every hour on the road, only returning for food and a couple hours of sleep after numerous calls from Alfred. It was the second time when he came home that he saw how much this was affecting his children. A wave of guilt hit, he knew that he hadn’t been paying as much attention to them as he should’ve.

You would’ve told Bruce to leave it to your fellow detectives, who were hellbent on getting you home. You would’ve told Bruce that he didn’t have to be Batman. He had to be home. God, you were so good, it sometimes hurt.

Bruce sat with his four boys on the couch, his arms wrapped around them. He updated them on the case, told them everything he knew. Of course, they asked to join him on patrol, but Bruce told them there was no need. He was going to take a few days off to spend with them.

It was after those few days that Bruce received a call from Gordon. They were in the middle of a somber dinner when his phone rang and the vigilante sprang up from his seat, nearly knocking his chair over. Everyone paused their eating.

“Gordon?” Bruce asked. The last few times, Gordon had nothing big to tell him, but Bruce answered his phone the same way every time.

“We got the car. It’s abandoned, but they drove out of the city. Parked near the woods.”

Dick, Tim, Jason, and Damian all wanted to go search with their father, but Alfred assured Bruce that he’d have them finish their dinners. Bruce gave each one of them a kiss on the head and promised to be home at a reasonable hour (which Alfred would hold him to, bless the man) before he rushed off.

It took a little while to get to the coordinates that Gordon sent, but when he did, he found detectives and cops and even civilian-organized search parties. It warmed Bruce’s heart, how much the city adored you. They knew you as Mrs Wayne, the kind and brave detective.

He joined the search as Batman, looking high and low. He got deep into the woods when finally, he found something. A group of costumed people all looking around, some confused, some awed. Bruce could tell they didn’t belong.

“Identify yourself,” he growled, coming out of the shadows and approaching them.

They all turned to him suddenly. No one moved or said anything for a second, until a redheaded woman came forward. She looked to be around your age, maybe a couple years older.

“This is probably going to come as a shock, but please, hear me out,” the woman began.

“I don’t ‘hear’ people out. Identify yourself, now,” Bruce demanded, in no mood for games.

The woman sighed softly. “Fine. You can call me te Black Widow. Back home, I — we — are known as the Avengers. We’re looking for someone named Y/N,” she told him.

[fatkish]

The Avengers x Y/N

——————————————————————————

[(Y/n) is sick and has been throwing up and is in the living room with the others]

Y/n: I want Bobo

Sam: *handing y/n a bottle of water* who’s Bobo?

*Bucky walks in*

Bucky: okay I got you that soda you like to drink when you’re nauseous, I also got some applesauce and some warm blankets

Y/n: *making grabby hands towards Bucky* Bobo!

Bucky: *snuggles next to y/n* Bobo’s here.

Steve: *lays the warm blankets on y/n and Bucky before setting the soda and applesauce packets on the side table and settling next to y/n* c’mere doll. You want to ask Loki to read to you? Would that help?

Y/n: yes please

Steve: hey Friday, can you ask Loki to come down and read to y/n, they’re sick

Friday: of course

Tony: wait a minute, you’re telling me rock of ages reads to y/n?

Thor: of course, lady/sir y/n says that my brother has a soothing voice and he often reads books to them that they are too lazy to read themselves

*a few minutes later*

Loki: *walks in with a thick book under his arm and sits behind y/n* alright now, where did we last leave off…oh yes, here we go. *proceeds to start reading aloud*

Y/n: *snuggles into Steve, Loki and Bucky while holding a large bowl on their lap and closes their eyes*

——————————————————————————

Natasha: If you had too, what would you give up food or sex?

Tony: Sex.

Pepper: Seriously, answer faster.

Tony: I’m sorry honey, when they said sex I wasn’t thinking about sex with you.

Pepper: It’s like a giant hug.

Natasha: Y/n, what about you? What would you give up sex or food?

Y/n: Food.

Natasha: Okay, how about sex or dinosaurs?

Y/n: Oh my God it’s like the movie Sophie’s Choice.

Steve: What about you Thor? What would you give up sex or food?

Thor: Oh... um... I don’t know, it’s too hard.

Steve: No, you gotta pick one.

Thor: Um, food... no, sex... no, food... sex... food. Ugh! I don’t know! I want both! I- I want hot people on bread!

——————————————————————————

Thor: So… I’ve seen you’ve been spending a lot of time with Loki recently.

Y/n: No, Thor, it's not what it looks like, I swear.

Thor: Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous?

Y/n: No! You’re the only one for me.

Thor: Is that so?

Y/n: I promise! Loki and I are just dating, okay? He’s my partner.

Thor: So there are no best-friends-feelings involved?

Y/n: You are still my one and only best friend! Loki is just the love of my life, nothing more!

Thor: But I’m still the platonic love of your life, right?

Y/n: Of course bro!

Thor: Bro...

Loki: What the-

——————————————————————————

*y/n is playing Amnesia the horror video game in their room*

Y/n: *is humming the jeopardy theme song*

Steve: *in the living room* has anyone seen y/n

Peter: uh yeah, they’re in their room, why

Steve: I’m just curious, haven’t seen them since yesterday

Y/n: *the amnesia monster appears and starts coming after them* OH FUCK! Oh no! No no no no no no stay away! I’m gonna die

Loki: *had snuck into their room and was hiding*

Loki: *cast an illusion to make himself appear as the monster from the game and slowly creeps up behind y/n*

Y/n: *managed to get away in the game* phew, I’m safe. *takes off their headphones*

Loki: *taps y/n’s shoulder*

Y/n: *looks behind them and screams* Ahhhhhhhh!

Y/n: * falls out of their chair and runs out of their room screaming*

The avengers are in the living room watching y/n run away screaming followed by Loki smiling

Tony: I seriously do not understand their relationship

Thor: Loki is simply getting back at y/n for hiding the Poptarts and blaming him for eating them

Thor: *realizes something* this one may be my fault

Steve: how so?

Thor: I may have gotten a bit upset and possibly thrown my brother out the window…

Bruce: *looks at Thor with that bewildered and slightly horrified look on his face*

Clint: remind me never to eat the last poptart

——————————————————————————

*Y/n, Peter, Scott and Thor are in the living room with pictures of the other Avengers on the TV screen*

*Natasha’s picture comes up*

Y/n: pass

Peter: respectfully pass

Scott: well I’m with Hope so pass

Thor: I still don’t get the point of this game

Scott: Thor, if you’d have sex with the person who’s picture is shown then you say smash, if not then you say pass

Thor: ah! Well lady Natasha is indeed quite the warrior! Smash

*the other avengers walk in*

*a picture of Clint comes up*

Y/n: not gonna lie, if he weren’t married, I’d totally smash

Peter: pass

Scott: pass

Thor: I too would smash

*clint looks shocked at the others but also blushes*

*a picture of Tony comes up*

Y/n: meh, pass. He’s like a dad

Peter: pass

Scott: he’s mean to me, pass

Thor: Smash!

*Tony rolls his eyes*

*a Picture of Steve pops up*

Y/n: Smash! Smash that ass

Peter: smash

Scott: I want him to smash me

Thor: I too would like to smash the captain

*steve is shocked*

*Loki walks in as his picture comes up*

y/n: Smashsmashsmashsmashsmashsmashsmashsmashsmash! SMASH!

Peter: pass?

Y/n: *looks at Peter bewildered* you’d pass on this glorious piece of art!? Look at him! Look at that beautiful face! Tell me you wouldn’t want to see this face breathless and lust driven. I don’t care if he’s on top or bottom, he can blow my back out any day.

Scott: *whispers* smash

Thor: y/n, you find my brother attractive?

Y/n: yesssssss!

Loki: *walks up behind y/n with a smug look on his face* is that so darling?

Y/n: *turns around and faints upon seeing Loki*

Loki: oh dear, are they dead?

——————————————————————————

*y/n and Peter are in the living room inside of a inflatable kiddie pool filled halfway with water wearing swimsuits. Both of them are wearing snorkels and goggles and are laying on their stomachs.*

Tony: *enters the room and sees Peter and y/n* what the hell are they doing?

Scott: I have no idea but honestly I feel the same

Steve: it’s -5 degrees Fahrenheit outside and these two are laying on their stomachs in a kiddie pool

Tony: how long have they been like that?

Scott: I don’t know, they were like this when I got here

Steve: and how long have been here?

Scott: thirty minutes give or take?

Tony: alright, that’s it, I’m pulling the plug on whatever this is

Clint: *from the vents* it’s fine! The kids are just trying to pretend it’s summer. They’re trying to pray the snow away and bring back tolerable temperatures

Steve: how long have they been doing this?

Clint: *from the vents* 7 hours

Tony: Jesus, I’m getting them out. *taps on y/n and peter’s shoulders* C’mon you two, out.

Peter: *lifts his head and removes the snorkel* but mister stark

Tony: no, no buts. Get out.

Peter and y/n: awwww *gets out*

Tony: and clean this up

——————————————————————————

*y/n comes running into the living room with a box that’s taped up*

Y/n: it’s here! It’s here! *sets the box on the coffee table and proceeds to open it*

Tony: what’cha got there kiddo?

Y/n: *pulls out an old creepy doll* This is Bella-Ann and she’s supposed to be haunted

Clint: yeah nope, I’m not staying anywhere near that thing

Tony: oh come on Legolas, it’s not real

Y/n: Bella killed her last owner, supposedly…

Steve: why would you want that?

Y/n: cause it only cost me 2 dollars and the seller promised it was haunted

Tony: yeah no, I’m calling the wizard. *calls Strange*

Dr. Strange: *picks up and is clearly annoyed* what is it this time?

Tony: y/n bought a supposedly haunted doll

Dr. Strange: and why are you calling me?

Y/n: uh, Tony?

Tony: not now y/n

Y/n: Tony!

Tony: what?!

Y/n and Steve: *hiding behind the couch*

Y/n: *whispers* the doll has a knife*

The doll: *is standing and holding a knife*

Tony: *to Strange* yeah there’s definitely something wrong with the doll, it’s got a knife and is currently chasing y/n*

Y/n: *running from the doll* help me!

Dr. Strange: *sighs and opens a portal* fine

——————————————————————————

*y/n comes skipping into a meeting*

Y/n: Balls in holes! Who wants to put ball in holes?!

Fury: excuse me?

Steve: language!

Y/n: aww ain’t anyone wanna play skee-ball, I’ve got tickets

Tony: y/n, we’re in a meeting

Sam: I’d love to but we’re kinda busy

Y/n: fine, I’ll go play with myself

Steve: you hear what you’re saying right?

Natasha: don’t bother, they’ve been hanging out with Deadpool

——————————————————————————

[batcavescolony]

Steve: *freshly defrosted*

Fury: let's go over what you-

*alarm start going off through the building, agents are running around*

SHIELD Agent: *busting through the door* I'm sorry sir we can't stop her! She- *falls*

Heather(Captain America Historian): YOU! *aggressively points at Steve*

Steve: uh? Ye-

Heather: YOU LIED ON EVER SINGLE ENLISTMENT FORM YOU EVER FILLED OUT!

Steve:...

Fury: what is ha- what are you reaching for?

Heather: *pulls out a note book* you! Are. Going. To. Tell. Me. EVERYTHING! Let's start, we think you're from Brooklyn but are you ACTUALLY?

Steve: yes I'm from Brooklyn.

Fury: this is cla-

Heather: I DON'T CARE! Did you have a job before the military?

[mischievous-thunder]

When you just want to save your universe and end up finding your soulmate

[thewrittenpodcast]

Steve: so. You thought-

Peter: oh my god a live psa demo

Peter: can I video this?

Tony: a live what

Steve:

Steve: oh no

[spooky-lil-spider-enjoyer]

Peter Parker HCs

- He totally needs glasses but prefers contacts cause he doesn't want to get made fun of even more for being a nerd

- Listens to p!atd. Originally discovered them cause of High Hopes and now loves them. Everybody Talks by Neon Trees and Notion by The Rare Occasions are runner up's, but he loves the death of a bachelor album.

-Has all the avengers merch ever, but especially Tony Starks. Like all of them. That's the secret reason we see him having such terrible quality computers in civil war. He just blows all of his money on cool limited edition avengers shit.

- Collects his own merch as well *cough* nerd *cough*

- Eats raw ramen while using the packet as sprinkles (we used to do this when I was younger at school cuz they wouldn't let us use the microwave to heat up water and I can totally imagine him doing this)

-Has passed out at his desk while studying (all the time in fact) and will show up to school the next day with ink smudged on his face showing half of his calculous homework on his face and his hair looks like a cat sleeps in it regularly.

-He seems like the type of kid who would be absolutely amazing at math, an absolute child prodigy, and not be able to write a story in ela for the life of him.

- Wears Crocs. Him and Ned try and collect the coolest charms, it's like a weird competition between the two.

-His mom taught him how to sew when he was younger (like seven or something) so he was able to patch up all of his own stuffed animals when they'd rip. He didn't know how important that skill would be until she died. He still looks over some of the fabric they would practice on when he is sad.

-May obviously taught him Italian and he grew up eating a ton of traditional Italian food prepared lovingly by May and Uncle Ben

-Once he and Tony get a bit closer they will speak Italian over the coms on missions or talk shit with each other right in front of the team. Peter loves it cause he only ever really gets to speak it with May, Tony loves tolerates it because it makes him miss him mom and helps him feel reconnected to a part of himself he thought he lost in that damn car crash when he sees it makes the kid happy. It drives everyone else crazy though.

Thanks for reading, lmk if you want a pt.2