#median systems

[roomwithavoid]

plural blinkies ~ANYONE ATTEMPTING TO START SYSCOURSE, OR GOING AGAINST PLURAL UNITY ON THIS POST WILL BE IMMEDIATELY BLOCKED~

(f2u with or without credit AFTER reblogging this post!)

[BLINKIES MASTERPOST]

[cambriancrew]

How did you learn how to switch? Any tips that aren't shared in standard guides?

We started with co-fronting which we did exclusively for a solid 8 or 9 months, several hours a day, with time set aside most days to hang out in a voice call with other plural friends so it was expected and anticipated and desired to have non-Willows type or talk or at least be proxied. We started with proxying in text and voice, worked up to being able to let them type, then got to full co-fronting where they could talk and figure out their own voice. Varyn, in this, was especially adamant about figuring out how to do things on his own in a way that felt natural to him. A lot of it was done with tactile and visual mental effort - the mental feeling of shoving us Willows aside to make room, of pushing us back and away, or settling in with their eyes behind the body's eyes, filling the body with their envisioned essence. Sometimes the mental sensations were what would be extremely rudely violent in real life - Varyn imagining picking up us-Willows and shoving us as hard as he could to the side, and when he felt us slipping back into control, pushing us back into the passenger's seat with all his might. But we were good with that. Not just accepting, but willing to take that kind of energy and put it into relaxing and relinquishing control.

After we got really good at that, we started working on getting us Willows out of the body entirely so we'd stop slipping back into control. One thing we'd done a lot, ever since first creating Jas way back when we were 15 and carried on after we discovered and embraced our plurality, was envisioning everyone but us as being in what we call "mini-form" - little hand-high versions of us all interacting in the external world. So when we tried to do full switches, one of the first things we tried was getting us into mini form outside of the body. Which worked pretty well, but we'd still slip back into front pretty easily. We talked about this with one of our plural friends and they mentioned median systems, and quite quickly we realized "Willow" was actually "Willows". So then we worked on addressing all the parts of us - not just the four of us, but each of us's little parts - addressing concerns, relieving anxieties, giving reassurances, and collecting full enthusiastic consent from our whole gestalt self. And then Varyn would envision gathering up every piece of us, going through our whole mental bodymap, feeling for each of us and getting us all squooshed together, and with a huge burst of mental effort, shoving us out of the body and simultaneously sliding himself into the bodymap and filling the whole body with his essence and spirit and mind. Or instead of himself, with whoever else wanted to be switched in.

And that worked pretty well for a long time and we got used to it. We Willows couldn't maintain our presence outside of the body for long before we'd go temporarily dormant/asleep, but we all liked that well enough.

We Willows felt unsatisfied though after awhile. We really, really wanted to be able to spend time in the innerworld with everyone else. It wasn't possible though no matter how much we tried, until we remembered and reconnected with a piece of the innerworld we'd created/stumbled on in our teens, a place we called The Cove. This place we could go to, or at least envision ourselves going to while still being connected to the body. It took months on this alone - all told, several years - but we did eventually figure out the right combination of sensation and visualization and effort to move our awareness and sense of self into that part of our innerworld, where only we could go. It took even more effort from Varyn and us than it took getting us out of the body and into mini-form or asleep, but we figured it out.

A couple months after we figured that out, we were talking with a friend about The Cove and how it changed to suit our needs and remarked that it was almost like the place had a guardian spirit - which was the realization we needed to hear, faintly at first and better and better over time, Cove Presence, who is a mix between being a guardian spirit of, the personification of, and the embodiment of The Cove. We referred to them by their initials for awhile, but CP is also a rather unsavory abbreviation so they changed their name to Coriander.

There's quite a bit of lore about them and The Cove and how it ties into the rest of our innerworld/paracosm but in brief, The Cove is half in the physical realm and half in the spiritual realm. Coriander was, a very very long time ago, a lost paladin of sorts who was shipwrecked on the semi-sentient island, and eventually became its caretaker and, after they died, its immortal guardian. The Cove is a sacred place for the lost to rest and recover, and is only accessible to those with a certain... Not exactly "pure-heartedness" or "wisdom" but that's the closest I can get to an English translation of camben-mindedness. You have to be aligned to the principle of guarding life, before the island that is all about guarding life will let you in. You have to resonate with it, not just the island itself, but with its twin souls - that of the physical land and its spiritual land, with its own soul and its guardian soul.

Anyway. We Willows are the only regulars, though sometimes we can get little glimpses in from some of our other Crewmates.

About half the time we switch out now, we go to The Cove. About half of what's left we're co-fronting or out in mini-form, and the last quarter of the time we're dormant.

We're still working on being able to go to other parts of the innerworld - we've successfully been able to for very short periods of time, but it's very difficult and hard to maintain.

Hope this helps any!

[multiplicity-positivity]

Do you have any advice for median systems of mostly or entirely facets & fragments differentiating who is who?

The sense of feeling like partially different identities, but never entirely different makes us feel like none of us are a whole person and this is very frustrating and overwhelming for us…We want to develop stronger & more separate identities of our own and we’re hoping you or someone else might know of any resources that could possibly help us with that?

Perhaps resources for facets intentionally developing into alters?

Thanks for taking the time to respond either way. We appreciate it. Hope you & your system are doing well!

Hey, we have had fragments in our own system who later either fused or otherwise developed into fully formed alters. For some it just happened sort of naturally as they fronted more and more and gained new traits, interests, and perspectives. For others, they had to spend time consciously trying to develop their identities a bit more.

We have a post that aims to help headmates become a bit more distinct and individualized - and as a guide it could probably work for fragments as well:

Though keep in mind, for some systems, they are who they are, and they won’t be able to reach a point where their fragments, parts, or headmates are extremely distinct and unique as individuals. It’s better to try and learn to accept yourself than try to change some unchangeable core aspects of who you are. So please use your own discretion and try not to force your system to function in a particular way if that’s not how your system has worked in the past and if attempting to change isn’t really working.

If anyone sees this who has any further advice, info, or resources for systems with fragments hoping to become more separate and distinct, we’d encourage you to share it to help anon.

[theredoesnotexist]

A doodle one of us made as a visual aid to help compare with another system how it feels like it works

[logicpng]

so, i have some thoughts. i feel like the game doesn't explore doey much, so i'm gonna take that as an opportunity to stretch him a lil.

in short, i see him as neither one whole nor 3 kids in a trench coat, but something in the middle of the two: a grown up who never really got to experience a proper childhood, the 3 originals in a blend with each other.

the time between creation and game events likely is enough for them to learn how to cooperate (up until. yknow). collectively or individually though, goddamn they need therapy

[ Description in ALT, text transcribed under cut ]

1st image:

point at head with teeth peeking: teeth may show more subtly, particularly when mischevious

point at hat: hat always at an angle

point at hand: stubby hands omg <3

point at neck: neck constantly bent in some fashion

Generally friendly and curious, may be more closed off and bitter if kevin is more dominant.

Collectively an adult due to passage of time and gaining experience, but still retains some more childish traits due to isolation from outside world and trauma, both collective and individual (holy shit do they need therapy).

Parts operate more or less seamlessly, but depending on situation some may show more or less of their traits.

When stressed, cooperation between parts may break down.

2nd image:

Kevin

present strongest when angry, most of anger processing goes through him.

not actually angry/cranky all of the time though, just a bit more gruff/edgy compared to the other two. tends to show teeth when talking.

over the years learned to control his rage better, can redirect it into being a bit of a troll w/ the others

understandably, safe haven's destruction made him revert and lose all restraint, resulting in lashing out, mixed with extreme emotions from others.

Jack

loved doey strongest before conversion (rip), as such expressions tend to default to his

learned to cope with constantly fighting for survival by cracking jokes and being more optimistic

present strongest when happy, may speak more childishly when in distress or comfortable

reverts into reliving trauma of death and family loss with safe haven's destruction

Matt

present strongest when focused on the leader role, strikes a balance between kevin and jack

through time learned to focus more on necessary action rather than allowing to succumb to past guilt

definitely still very stressed out from responsibility, especially after poppy leaving, learned not to show it through cooperation with kevin and jack

safe haven's destruction just plunges him straight into a guilt spiral

Note pointing at bottom notes for each: safe haven's destruction is a massively traumatic event for them, resulting in the three regressing into child selves from distress, mixed in with emotions from individual traumatic memories

[genderqueerdykes]

btw 'syscourse' and plural infighting isn't accomplishing anything. back in the late 90s and early 2000s, the only communities and resources for plurals that were widely available were for and by non-traumagenic systems. the only people who were advocating for normalizing and accepting plurality on a large scale were non-traumagenic systems. if you did research into plurality 10 - 15 years ago, most of the results that came up would have been experiences written by spiritual and natural plurals.

many people at the time were expressing their dislike of forcing every single plural to identify as if they had trauma- many found this insulting to themselves, and rightfully so! no one should be forced to identify in a way they don't agree with just to rightfully be a part of a community they already occupy. this obsession with "you can only be plural if you have trauma" has only come about extremely recently. i found out about plurality through the otherkin community. i was actually told about DID by someone in the spiritual plurality community. people don't seem to understand that most non-traumagenic systems have respect for traumagenic systems and don't gatekeep their spaces to prevent us from entering.

older plural spaces on the web like healthymultiplicity accepted all plurals. the goal of the community was to show that you can live as plural and not have it be a tragedy or something to "fix". if anything, folks with dissociative disorders owe a LOT to non-traumagenic systems for pushing to normalize plurality without implying that we HAVE to integrate our headmates and try to stop being plural. a huge part of the early online plural community was there to push that plurals can and do live happy lives and shouldn't view their plurality as a bad thing

it's not going to make singlet society see us in a better light. it's not going to get people to understand plurality better. it's not going to get us better mental health resources. it's not going to improve the quality of care for dissociative and traumagenic systems. all you're doing is bullying someone else that you don't understand simply because you don't agree with them.

you're not going to recover from your trauma or understand your own plurality better by denying the existence of other types of plurality. you're not "making the community safer" by gatekeeping. telling other people how their brains work is policing their identities. whether or not you want to accept it, if you forcefully kick endos out of plural spaces, you are the cop you claim to hate.

fighting with people on your own team will never net you a victory. to every other dissociative and traumagenic system: endos are on your side. you are wearing the same jersey. you are made of the same flesh and blood. enough. come together to share your similarities instead of fighting over differences. celebrate the diversity that plurality offers. don't take someone else's identity personally. someone can share the space with you without having to match exactly how you identify. diversity is what makes a community thrive.

[lefluoritesys]

"What's your favorite type of music?"

*sweats in DID* "U-uhm... I- I listen to everything, depending on my mood :D"

The moods sitting in the back of my head watching me: "No, no, they've got a point"

[cambriancrew]

Hello there!

I've been a follower of yours for a while now, and I really appreciate all y'all've done to educate about plurality on here in spite of how rude some people can be. I've been slowly trying to be better about actually listening to my headmates - I think the term for how mine are is a median system? - and I'd like to learn more about how to work better with them

Do you have any recommended reading, or could you point me in a general direction to search? I'm finding that so much of what works for folks is variable, which I suppose makes sense, given the highly individual nature of this stuff, and I'm just having a hard time wading through research papers that only lightly touch on what I'm actually looking for

I totally understand if this is too vague or if y'all can't help (I've got chronic fatigue, totally a fellow spoonie!), and either way I really am so happy to see you on my dash on such a regular basis!

May you have a peaceful day,

Trapper&co

Hey :)

There is, unfortunately, very little about median systems out there, and not much more about how to work with your system regardless of type. Nothing at all in research papers - what there is comes directly from lived experience from people in the plural community.

There's these three articles on median systems from medians. There's some excellent articles on Healthymultiplicity.com and I also highly recommend the articles on Plures House's site here.

Hope this helps. :)

[interstellarsystem]

You Could Be Median!

We've seen some posts lately where people are saying they feel too plural to be a singlet and too singlet to be plural, or that they feel certain plural-ish ways about their kintypes... And, well, we have news for you--there's (possibly) a word for that!

See, while a lot of people see "multiple system" and "plural system" as interchangable, they actually have nuance to their meanings. And there's a third term, "median system", that might actually apply to you!

Some descriptions of the terms, for reference!

This won't be the only term list in this post, but to avoid dumping a ton of terms at the start without context, they'll show up where relevant. For now, though, here's a few.

Singlet:

The state of being one singular person/identity in one body. Synonym for non-plural.

Plural:

More than one entity, self, identity or consciousness in a single body. Simply, being more-than-one in some way. This is more of an umbrella term for multiple and median.

Multiple:

Having more than one distinct identities or people within a body.

Median:

The state of being somewhere between "singlet" and "multiple" on the plural spectrum.

Now, that's pretty vague, especially if this is a new concept to you! What does "inbetween" of multiple and singlet even really look like? The answer is, well... Anything, almost! But that's also vague and unhelpful. So...

Some examples of what being a median system could feel like...

You're like a metaphorical hydra--all part of one dragon, but there's different heads. You might feel parts of yourself arguing or thinking different thoughts, and some might be more in charge at times than others, but in the end, you're all a part of one unit anyway.

You're like a metaphorical coin--you're all one single thing, but there's different faces. Depending on what angle someone looks at you from, they could see something completely different.

You're like a gemstone cut for a ring--all one stone, but there's facets of you that reflect light just a little differently.

You speak to your subconscious, but because that subconscious is you, you feel like you're an inbetween of being just one person and two people. (This can also include things like daemonism!)

You feel like your identity itself is a shapeshifter (not in a kintype way--your identity as a whole).

You're otherkin/fictionkin/etc, and your kintypes have juuuust a little too much separation from you to feel like they're still you, but they're you enough that they're not separate people. They're not entirely distinct from you, but they're also not entirely wholly you, either. (More on this one later!)

You feel too much like a singlet to be plural, but too much like a system to be a singlet.

You age or pet regress, and feel like your regressed self is a different version of you. Sure, they're still you! But they're just different enough that they fall in a grey area of being "you" vs "not you".

You feel like "you" are, in whole, a person wearing a lot of different masks. The masks might make you act a little different, or look a little to-the-left of your normal appearance. All the masks are a part of you, as much as you're a part of them.

You feel like you sometimes have a different "filter" put over you, like a photo being digitally edited. You're still the same base thing, but sometimes there's an extra layer on top that makes you a little different.

You don't feel singlet or multiple, but feel like a secret third thing that's in any way inbetween.

You feel like you're almost a system.

Now, that's nowhere near an exhaustive list, but it's a bunch of stuff we've experienced and/or heard from others in the community. That gemstone comparison is actually common enough for the median version of the term "headmate" to be a sort of reference to how it feels!

Headmate (also alter, system member):

An entity/person that is a part of a system.

Facet:

A type of headmate that is a part of a median system.

There's also a term for identities that blur the line between "fictive" and "fictionkin", because the experience of being median while having identities that feel like fictives and fictotypes simultaneously is so common! (There's now a factbased identity term for the experience too!)

Fableing:

A type of facet in a median system that shares experiences of both fictionkin and fictives, making them an inbetween, adjacent to both experiences, or both at the same time.

Factling:

A type of facet in a median system that shares experiences of both factkin and factives, making them an inbetween, adjacent to both experiences, or both at the same time.

Otherkinity and Median Systems

In particular though, we see a lot of otherkin who say a lot of very plural-y things about their kintypes. While not everyone who says these things is 100% plural and maybe just one or two of these points to nothing plurality related at all... These are things we think are pretty good indicators you should at least consider looking into median systems, even if you've looked into being multiple before.

Your kintypes can speak or communicate to you, disagree with you or each other, or interact with things separate from you. This doesn't need to include written or spoken language, either! Sometimes internal instincts clashing can feel a lot like median facets disagreeing.

Shifting causes you to experience memory loss, amnesia, or anything similar.

Shifting causes a complete gender change, even if previously and after the shift you disagree.

Shifting causes you to act "out of character" compared to your usual self.

Shifting causes a complete sexuality change, even if previously and after the shift you disagree.

Shifting causes you to want to change your name, even if previously and after the shift you disagree.

You don't feel like you're yourself while shifted.

You get thoughts that you don't feel belong to you, and feel like they belong more to your kintype.

You don't feel too much like you are your kintype, unless you're in a shift. (Also check out fictionflickering/otherflickering!)

Your kintypes do things that you're unaware of while you're shifted.

You commonly dissociate during or before shifting.

Your kintypes change your likes and dislikes (for example, while shifted you might hate apples while when not in a shift you love them).

You'd call your kintypes headmates or you feel like they'd be classified as headmates if you had DID/OSDD (spoiler alert, you don't need those to be a system!)

Your shifts cause a full or very strong personality change--especially if other people notice.

You feel disconnected from your body or lose control of your body while shifting.

You come out of a shift and are confused, distressed, or surprised at how you acted during it.

Like I said, not all of these point toward being median if there's just one or two--but, if you have the time to look into it, I'd recommend giving it some thought!

Misc FAQs

Do I have to call myself a median system if I fit a lot of/all of this?

Nope! Your identity is yours to label, and this post isn't meant to shove people into boxes. This is simply meant to inform people of what a median system is, and let people come to informed decisions themselves.

Can you be both multiple and median?

Absolutely! There's plenty of ways this can be a thing, too. Some examples:

Multiple system with median subsystems.

Median system with multiple subsystems.

A system that fluctuates between median and multiple.

A system with a bunch of headmates who are median or multiple (regardless of subsystems).

You could be both at once, which we've seen called "mediple"!

Can you have a CDD (like DID and OSDD) and be median?

Yep! It's commonly believed that most (not all!) OSDD systems often fall under the median umbrella, even! A system of any structure or origin can also have median members within it, regardless of other parts of how it functions.

Can you choose to be median?

As with plurality in general--yes, probably! We haven't seen any guides to specifically form a median system, but we're sure it's possible. Daemonism, for example, is usually counted as a nonplural experience by their community, as daemons are "you" in another font--for lack of better phrasing. But a lot of people do consider this to be a type of median plurality in their own experiences!

Is this an endo system thing?

No. Endogenic and traumagenic systems alike can both experience median plurality, and can also be disordered or nondisordered. The term didn't even originate in endogenic-specific spaces, nor did it originate recently either. "Midcontinuum" was presented as a term in around 1996-1997, and "median" was created in 2002. Some early plural communtiy mentions of the terms:

Us and Being Median:

This was co-written by a median subsystem (Dagger of Decay) and one of said subsystem’s QPPs in-system (Shrapnel). While we don’t reflect the entirety of our experience of having median plurality within our system, we can share what we personally know of our own life in the hopes that it resonates with others in a helpful way.

Being a median subsystem to me (Dagger of Decay), feels like I’m separate sides of the same metaphorical coin. (At least, that was an accurate descriptor until I discovered more facets than just the two.) You look at this coin, and one side might have a picture of one thing on it, while the other has something completely different–but you’d be wrong if you said that this was two separate coins just because it’s different depending on how you see it or how you hold it. You’d also be wrong in saying that the coin only had one uniform side–I mean, it clearly has different pictures on each side, they’re clearly different!

The faces of the coin are the fableings that make up me as a person. If I really wanted to, I could probably label myself as one person with very strong kintype shifts, but that doesn’t feel like it covers the full scope of my identity. I can’t talk to my facets, I also can hardly ever disagree with them because we’re so close to the singlet end of the spectrum. But even still, when I’m Tomura Shigaraki, I’m not really the other facets of myself anymore–it’s like you’ve spun that coin around and they’re the ones who are face down, hidden from sight for that moment. The same is true for when any other one is in control. The coin just sort of flips itself occasionally and oops! I’m the same base guy, but in a different font. A little bit to the left maybe.

The amount of separatedness between us fluctuates–sometimes I say “I” to refer to all of me, other times we say “we”. That’s one of the more noticeable fluctuations between my facets, but there’s plenty of other things that shift and change too–how distinct we feel, how much we can disagree with each other, how much we feel connected to other identities we hold… But in the end, we’re solidly sat in the grey area between “one singular guy with no extras” and “multiple guys in one head”--and it took our system a while to get a hold of what that can mean and feel like, so I hope some people who are questioning or struggling with their identity can get a little bit of something out of this post.

For further reading:

The Dragonheart Collective's "Am I plural" guide.

Allium House's "what is the self?" essay.

Endogenic Hub's "Medians" page.

Otherkin Wiki's Plurality page (section on median plurality included).

Beepbird's "Median is More than People With Parts".

Beepbird's "For Medians: Fronting and Switching Control".

Beepbird's entire median plurality links section, honestly.

[sapphic-dice]

Lancer is a gender affirming experience.

[winterwonderl]

If your fictionkins talk on their own and take over your body..

Have you ever considered being PLURAL?

[dreamers-collective]

It’s okay if you don’t know who you are. It’s okay if you don’t have clear profiles on every system member. It’s okay if you struggle to make sense of yourself and your alters.

You can take as much time as you need to figure it out, but it’s also okay if you never figure it out.

You are allowed to simply exist as you are. Even if you don’t know who that is. Even if it changes by the hour.

[finnslay]

[mozzarella-sys]

systemscringe is so fucking stupid?? like ok fakeclaiming like 70% of systems 💔

first of all they're anti endo (not the worst ig)

they don't believe ramcoa exists. are they fucking stupid like cmon now 💔💔 "you can't program alters into your brain!!! you need ton of trauma!!" do you think ramcoa would not be traumatizing

they think fictives don't exist. in endogenic plurality, they exist. in traumagenic plurality, it is very possible for an alter to cling onto some fictional character and become that fictional character. are they ok in the head?? this is just ridiculous ngl

they think a system cant have a lot of alters. fully possible i do fear?????? and considering that traumagenic lads can split after the initial trauma it's fully possible

they're just stupid

sybau sybau sybau

ok that's it

[freezingcoldsystemtakes-archived]

[shitty mid 2000s anti-piracy psa voice] you wouldn't download a headmate

.