#now to do some work on that project... oops
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you made me ship shelliot so hard it's not even funny 😭 like normally im not super into rarepairs bc it seems ppl ship them just to ship them but i legit see where you're coming from, especially in the same context as your comic where their story begins after elliot moves in. i actually love your comic i cannot wait for the next part (not trying to pressure you obv). ive never gotten too many hearts with either of them but your characterization just feels so accurate like i feel like I could see your story with their dialogue happening in the game and it wouldn't feel out of place at all. and also finally (oops ive been rambling), your art style isn't overly detailed but the facial expressions/body language/like perspective i guess of the characters, especially shane and elliot on the dock is so well done, the small changes in positioning work so well to communicate the change in their body language and its just really impressive.
sorry i yapped or if it was weird or something i promise i was not trying to come off weird 😭😭😭 i just really admire good fanworks such as yours and it's important to tell authors/creators that they're doing well and yeah
also if you (or anyone else) has any shelliot fic recommendations i would loveee to hear them :>
No but seriously it's so funny that your like "I hope I'm not being weird" meanwhile I reread over and over your super thoughtful message to keep me going 😭
YOU GUYS DON'T REALIZE I NEED THOSE HYPER DETAILED COMPLIMENT or my stupid brain will go like "Okay time to think you're worthless and that what you're doing doesn't matter"
No I can point at the screen and say "See? 👉📱 SEE?! 👉👉📱?" and it's putting another coin in the machine hehe
Anyway, thank you so much 😭
AND YES I HAVE FICS TO RECOMMEND! ONCE AGAIN, @cutethulu you know the drill hehe
Camellia Station, by Awdrey (Explicit - but it's only one short smut scene in the last chapter for now)
Now it's still in progress (updating once a month) and they still didn't smooch yet, but that's what you get when you fall into the Shelliott rabbit hole, hehe, you can't be picky
It's really well written and the author and I have a lot of similarities in our interpretations of Shane and Elliott :) Go give it some love!
Also some one shots by @mongoosingisme that I really love :
Untitled Shelliott Ranch Project
Herding cats (Explicit - Shane/Elliott/fem!farmer)
And UHHH maybe you've seen it already but I wrote one about Shells, it's an alternate ending to part 34 (it's my first one and I'm really proud of it teehee)
Shells, alternate ending, by shells_stardew (Explicit)
Also @visionofthebees wrote this one for me on the same concept :
One Shell of a Night, by Visionofthebees (Explicit)
Be warned it's EXTREMELLY SILLY and she didn't even reread it before posting, but I love it with all my heart it's so so funny hahaha
I love her so imma also recommend her Clint x Elliott fic too (yes yes you read that right, she's 10 degrees further than me on the crack ship scene) :
Falling Ore You (Explicit) (46 chapters, completed)
LISTEN SHE MAKES IT WORK OKAY! SHE REALLY DOES!
And also, check my bookmarks! They are some non-Shelliott stuff that I absolutely love in there! (BUT always ALWAYS check the tags before reading, there is also some dark stuff haha)
Here you go, hope I didn't recommend all the ones you already knew about, as we all know this is not an extremely popular ship so this is what we get, quality over quantity hahahaa 😭
#fic rec#shelliott#shane stardew valley#stardew bachelors#elliott stardew valley#stardew#sdv shane#elliott sdv
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✨ Aventurine Analysis: Which Came First - the Stone or the Stoneheart? ✨
Do you guys ever think about how aventurine (AKA Goldstone) is a man-made semi-precious stone created by a reduction of copper ions added to molten glass and sealed in a hypoxic (no oxygen) environment that gives it a glittery effect known as aventurescence?
And do you ever think about how the word 'aventurine' itself (to quote Wikipedia) "derives from the Italian "a ventura" meaning "by chance". This is an allusion to the lucky discovery of aventurine glass or 'goldstone' at some point in the 18th century."
And do you ever think about how Aventurine (the natural gemstone) was named after the glass instead of the other way round, because it has a similarly glittery quality?
Because I do!
And then I think about how Aventurine (the character) was originally bought/sold for copper(!) coins, and came from a desert planet (glass is made from sand), and how it's actually pretty plausible that Aventurine's Cornerstone - based on the natural stone and not the man-made stone as far as I can tell - was actually named after him and not the other way round.
Analysis/explanation below! :)
Theory: what if the Cornerstones aren't a set of predetermined stones that get passed down, but rather a new Stoneheart gets their own stone that's unique to them upon induction?
For example, take Obsidian: she expresses an enjoyment of bloodshed, has a line where she says that it's 'no fun for prey to die a natural death', and has vampiric design motifs, which can be thematically-aligned with real obsidian. Historically, it's been used to craft weaponry sharper than steel out of volcanic glass, therefore associating it with bloodshed and destruction, plus the word 'obsidian' means 'of darkness' - suitably vampiric!
I personally think it's more likely that she was Like That before receiving her Cornerstone and that it was created to fit her, as opposed to the other way round (although I recognize it's not completely implausible for Diamond to have had the Obsidian stone conveniently vacant at time of hiring, or even actively searched for employees who fit the stone's 'aura', maybe).
Kakavasha's trial was called the 'Egyhazo Aventurine Case', which would - unless it's A) lore oversight on Hoyo's part, or B) just a wild coincidence - support the idea of him being called Aventurine before receiving his Cornerstone, especially since he would have needed a name other than his birth name to go by in-between being hired by the IPC and becoming a Stoneheart (based on conjecture and educated guessing). Jade told him the following at the end of his trial:
"Kakavasha... A good name, but unfortunately destined to be buried in the dirt. You though, you deserve to live, to create even more wealth for us. Go, pick the clothes you like, then choose your desired identity... and then use them well, child."
Naming himself after the court case that became his job interview is as good a pick as any, especially on short notice since he probably didn't have a lot of time to mull it over.
*deep breath*
So: Aventurine, forged in a suffocating environment from copper pieces and desert glass (and displaying the potentially lucrative 'glitter' of schemes and stratagems long before assuming his current role) being the inspiration for the similarly-glittering Cornerstone, the Aventurine of Stratagems, doesn't seem too far-fetched to me!
Plus it also clears up the vague irritation I always felt at his pre-employment (let alone pre-Stoneheart) court case being called that lmao
Thank you for reading! I wrote this instead of working on a project I was supposed to be working on ✌️😌
Bonus content for getting to the end of the post: some nice pictures of Goldstone vs natural aventurine :)
#now to do some work on that project... oops#my excuse is that it's also Aventurine-related so this counts as research (*copes heavily*)#also I didn't really plan this out I just wrote it on the fly so if I fucked up anywhere then... that's why#:)#roxirinhsr#roxirinwrites#aventurine analysis#analysis#aventurine#aventurine hsr#honkai star rail#hsr#hsr aventurine
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With today's entry, I was rather surprised and confused that Johnathan seemed to turn around so quickly from the absolute pit of despair he was in yesterday, having newfound determination and energy when he's seemingly been completely hopeless and inactive for weeks now (and for good reason). Not that I ever thought he'd completely given up, but there's definitely been a slow decline in how descriptive his journal entries have been to reflect his declining mental state (more robotic, less of his actual feelings about things), and today was a sharp contrast; it feels more like the early entries again. I thought, well, his mind is probably just so cracked at this point that he's looped all the way back around to being bold and energetic again, because by now he's desperate enough to throw caution to the wind: he either succeeds doing something extremely reckless to escape, or he fails and meets his end in a far better way than if he just waits for his fate by Dracula's hands.
...But having thought about it and reading other posts, I realized (probably stupidly obvious as it is) that his sudden change in mood probably has to do with what happened to the baby. Despite how scared he's been all this time, yesterday he didn't hesitate for a single second to try to save the baby once he realized from the previous incident what was happening, not thinking about his own life at all. And then he despaired when he couldn't save the child, the first time he's mentioned crying in the book at all, and then he had to witness the mother blaming him for her baby's death, and being killed herself for trying to rescue it. Now, the day after that horrific and heartbreaking failure, he's suddenly more determined than he's been in ages to escape. Maybe that was a turning point for Johnathan, and lit a fire under him... maybe he's clinging to the need to escape not just for himself and the people he loves anymore, but for the vain hope that he can put a stop to Dracula's schemes somehow once he gets out, because he doesn't want to let any more children die :' )
#dracula#dracula daily#i'm a new reader so idk how much this is going into headcanon territory or will be backed up later#but i wonder if johnathan feels protective of children because he and mina want kids#i mean he's a good and sweet man so i'm sure he would react the same regardless even if he didn't have a fiance#but if he's planning to one day become a father i'm sure that makes his feelings even stronger :')#he hears those babies crying and thinks about if those had been his and mina's future children. man.#i'm sure that would have made him empathize with the mother even more too; if mina wants to have a child..........#ahhhhhhh i've made myself sad. yesterday's and today's part just made me so sad 😭💔#johnathan you're so good and brave 😭 you're doing your best 😭 it'll be okay in the end 😭#oops i projected paternal instincts onto a soft male blorbo again-#okay but now i need an au where by some miracle he manages to abscond with a baby dracula brings to be killed and it's just#Johnathan And Baby Against The World (vampire)#does that exist. please tell me johnathan and kids content exist cause 🥹🥹🥹#idk how it would work but thinking about it makes me emotional lol :' )
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some very very quick costume shorthands!
#&juliet#had the absolute luck of watching this live the other night and it was. truly amazing!!! aaah#rough character designs for the younger leads (excluding like the Grown adult duos..) because?? idk#this is how it always starts. once the character designs start getting simplified like this that's when it all begins#which is hmmm timing but i really can't shut up about this musical it was so so fun. absolute vibes and energy#made me laugh and cry and was such an Experience. i adore them all but may specifically made me sob at some parts dfjkldfh#lots of thoughts! but one of the favs is how they wrote it so the existing songs and actions fit so well.#like in a rhyming bit they had frankie accept a drink and then the song was like ''drink in hand'' and i was all !!!!!!#also maybe it's local censorship? but there wasn't the kisses.. they replaced it w kissing hands and then holding hands#which is like a cute nod to the ''hand to hand holy palmers kiss' or smth but also maybe two guys doing that would not have made it past :/#oh my god i. the way rnj parallels the shakespeare duo... whdskjfhgh. may + not being a Girl kdjhgf. frankie and may. aaagh.#angelique being so so badass. i . the speech about Gender by anne and the Proposal by angelique both made the whole theatre cheer love that#also rotating stage lives in my mind rent free i ADORE the set holy moly.. also also the actors were so good. also the Projections.#also the music and costumes and special effects and aerial moments. and the ensemble. and the choreo#also the cast is so talented. and pretty. and the whole confidence part vs the vulnerability of some bits... whshjfgjkl. hhh#im just listing stuff now but it was so vibes. what an experience ever. it's also shot me directly into 14-years-old again so#spent the morning alone vibing to the soundtrack intensely... i just... sometimes things hold special places in your heart idk!!!#i don't know what to do with these designs though... like the show is such a lovely Spectacle but also idk where to branch out by myself no#there's so much to Absorb again and again. i get the feeling any true work from this i would do in a form of an animatic though.. oops#tldr? 1. &juliet very good just as itself 2. we have History 3. i got to see it live which always propels me into bonkers over musicals!#so so rough but i needed to get smth out and . whatever. an art blog is an art blog. back to hiatus now i think#<reminder to myself: this is essentially an artchive.. there's no quality control if you don't want it! have fun!! ily>
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Is it November 8th and I only just now finished Day 1 of Huevember? Yes.
Do I care? No.
Robots.
#my art#huevember#huevember 2023#huevember day 1#cyvern#transformers oc#tfa oc#cyvern's a tfa oc now oop :3#Cyvern is a predacon who works in the science division and worked on project safeguard and project aerialbot heeheehoohoo#i was struggle-bus-ing hard on this one but tbf i always hate the first hue XD#also ive been working over 2 hours later than scheduled all week so like yknow#if i wanna do some late huevembers then i CAN#i pay taxes i can do late huevembers its my life uwu
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hhh i've had like. no drive to work on any art or writing projects. ;n; my heart is still so invested in the stories and characters I've created, but the motivation to take those feelings and put it into some form of content is next to nil. i don't know why it's been like that but it's kinda sad :c
don't get me wrong - i'm happy with most of the things i've created lately, but it's also been this strange game of doubt and comparison going on in my head when it comes to actually sharing what I make. there are a lot of pieces of art and writing that i just haven't posted because i feel like it's not in a place where it's good enough for anyone other than myself. the idea of editing and actually finishing some projects so that i can make sense of them online is overwhelming even tho i would love to just... get some of those ideas out for anyone who might be interested in hearing about them, you know?
anyway. probably just need to let myself take some kind of break?? idk what that would really entail at this point tho. it's just been a weird mental state that I need to work out i guess.
#so like. not quite a hiatus but some Secret Other Thing#i'm hoping the motivation to actually finish projects and share them will come back to me#but right now i think i need to either just focus on drawing or writing stuff without any intention of sharing it#or maybe i shouldn't draw/write at all for a while instead#but i'd still love to talk about the characters and stories with y'all??#unfortunately that really only seems to work best within like personal messages between friends or whatever#i've tried posting random content about characters on here but it feels weird without any art to go along with it#(like when i wrote that post about khalan's backstory that one time)#so i just dont talk about them at all outside of that because i can't tell if ppl would actually want to hear about them#and even if ppl do i have no idea where to start without any prompts or specific questions to build off of kdjfg#anyway#i'm rambling now oops#dont know what the point of this post is but i'll probably delete it eventually#text post#spectre says
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😍😍😍
#accidentally slept through my only class today#which whoops sorry. (my 9am english)#which kind of killed step 1 of a plan of mine but thats okay#anyways THEN i had to go downtown to pick up this award bc i forgot to show up to the ceremony like a dumb dumb#but the building was like a 25 minute walk and it was COLD (punishment for my dumb dumbness tbh) but anyways i got there early so i walked#around the block and then went inside and picked up my medal#and i was already far downtown so then i popped my head in a couple of stores as i slowly walked back#got a few things from target. new hair clip nail polish m&ms pens and then a mango. very excited to eat that either later today or tomorrow#then i popped in the calligraphy store and then the comic shop and looked around. saw some white ribbon in the calligraphy store which ive#been looking for but didnt get it because it was a bit wide and kind of expensive and i want a lot for my project idea#(want to write out some of my favorite poems on them in sharpie and then use it to accessorize)#and then i went to the comic shop and peeked around. saw a nubia issue and a few gl 2021s in the discount bin but i didnt get them bc#they were all middle issues and i havent read those books yet although i do want to someday bc my guys were in them. one of the gl 21s even#had simon on the cover so i was very !!!!!!!! thats my guy!!!!!#didnt buy anything there but i did ask the guy to make sure to order a copy of the spirit world tpb so ill stop by to get that in a few wks#and then i went to the bookstore cafe and got a cold brew and did a but of English there. they have tables in the stacks its nice. the one i#grabbed was just surrounded by old paperbacks of sci fi and thrillers lol. didnt see anything id read but recognized a few author names like#card (no enders game though) and the pern lady (idk her name i havent read it). anyways did half a blog post thats technically late (ill#backdate though dw) and then packed up and i grabbed a gyro from the halal cart on that block which i just finished back at my dorm <3333#anyways good times. now im gonna try and spam some work and go to freaking trivia team for the first time in a month later. oops#blah#oh and i think the halal cart guy may have given me a free soda. unsure abt that though bc its possible it came with and i was just being#silly again. so anyways i had a ginger ale too
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lol did I just lose 3 followers for mentioning a cool new song? ok
#I've lost followers for less tbh so eh#it's fine lol#hope you'll find what you're looking for elsewhere best of luck to you#honestly thought more people would've left by now with how I can't focus and just draw the darn bombeep they probably follow me for#trust me I want to they're still my fav bois and I wanna do way more stuff with them#but atm idk it's just#sneaky corpse brainworm effin shit up oops#but nws hopefully it can be redirected in a productive direction somehow like towards whitty or something#with the voice headcanons and all that some sort of vibes should be able to be projected somehow maybe idk lol#mmm tbh I wish so bad I could animate or do animatics properly bc I have ideas#bombeep ideas#in relation to bits of various letsplay audio that could be made to work out of context somehow I'm sure ha#anyways it is what it is I'll stop rambling and go get some proper sleep now ok cool#laters bye
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I'm in thatttt
New multi-animator project drops December 27! Our biggest one yet!
#lmk#lmk reanimated#lego monkie kid#hahahahaha it took half a year but it was so fun this is the first time i didn't feel lost at a discord server (they scare me oops)#also i can make a full and FULL animation (oh god i hate it) gonna stick to my beloved storyboard or rough lineart from now on#(me who signed up for a gravity falls reanimated one day after sending my parts) ... not gonna lineart again... sure#but it's so awesome#UGHHH i love the lego style i love flying bark so much they're so insane#and the people on the MAP are insanely talented GUSH i need to eat some of those parts YUM YUM#i have never in my life been interested with learning after effects before seeing what some ppl do#my and my 5 minutes computer time every weekend only🥲 miss computer time no fair I'm not with it all week🥲🥲#anywho YEAHHHHHH#making something part of bigger something it's way more fun sometimes#i forgot to post wips anywhere but I'll do like a presses video because I'm so proud of my backgrounds and the lineart is good :P :)#it was just such a pain to do I'm a slow drawer with lineart#animation sketch? that i can do#well time to go back to not drawing ever (buuut I'm working on a project with a friend so that will be cool in a few months hopefully)#I'm doing a lot of animation side quests this year#it's fun#well#art side quests actually;; i made so much random new shit this year#sculpting is incredibly fun#coloring is my enemy#I'm way off track these are not my hours#lego monkie kid animation#!!!!!!!!!!!!
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please please write about theodore nott getting caught by the reader touching himself to her. then absolutely wrenching her in the his dorm. overtimulation. squirting. round after round.
This one was a lot longer than I originally planned, oops, lol.
Just One More
Theodore Nott x F!Reader
Warnings: mention of masturbation, oral(female receiving), squirting, overstimulation, forced orgasms, unprotected sex, creampie
18+ Minors DNI

You and Theodore had gotten assigned for a project together for potions and were working on it in his dorm. You had called it for the day, exhausted and ready to rest after the long school day and hours working on this project with Theo.
You weren’t extremely close with the boy, but that didn’t stop his attempts to flirt with you and joke around with you whenever he did see you. And you had to admit, you may have developed a small crush on him. He was hot and flirted with you, what else could you say?
You said ‘goodbye’ and left his dorm, heading to your own. You noticed once you got there that you had left your textbook in his dorm and figured you’d just grab it real quick.
But as you were about to knock on his door, you could hear faint noises inside. After a second of listening, you realized the noises were moans. Did he have a girl over? It was just his moans you could hear so probably not.
“Oh, (Y/N), cara mia. Fuck.” You heard coming from the other side of the door.
‘(Y/N)’ Was he really moaning your name? Holy shit.
Before you even realized it, you were knocking on the door. You could hear a quiet cuss escape his lips and some shuffling with a louder ‘Hold on’ coming from him. After a moment, the door opened, and Theo leaned against the door frame before his eyes widened when he saw it was you, quickly turning his expression into a calm one with a flirty smirk.
“Cara mia. What are you doing here? Didn’t get enough of me?” He asked as he looked you over.
“Uh, I forgot my textbook. Though, it seems like you were the one who didn’t get enough of me.” You said, giving him a sweet, innocent smile.
His smirk fell. “What are you talking about?” He shifted slightly, clearly nervous now.
“I kinda heard you. You moaned my name. I was only gone for a few minutes, it seems like you barely waited after I left to, uh, you know.” You said, tilting your head.
“How long were you outside my door, bella?” He asked.
“Long enough.” You shrugged.
He looked at you for a few seconds, like he was pondering his next move before pulling you into the room and closing the door behind you.
“Seems to me like you were enjoying listening in.” He said as he backed you up to the bed.
“Well, it was more like I was surprised, especially once I heard my name.” Your legs hit the bed and you fell on it.
“So you didn’t like it?” He leaned down, putting his arms on either side of you to trap you on the bed.
“I didn’t say that.”
“If you wanted, I could show you more of those sounds now.” He lowered his head to your ear as he spoke quietly. “I could show you what I was thinking about doing to you that was making me moan like that.”
“Very tempting.” You said back just as quietly as him. “How should we start?”
“How about we start by getting these clothes off?” He said as he leaned back and helped you out of your clothes, a bit quickly and desperately. “Fucking hell, principessa. You’re fucking gorgeous.” He said before leaning back down to pepper kisses along your neck, trailing up before connecting your lips. The kiss was heated and hasty, like he couldn’t get enough. He nestled between your legs, his hands roaming along your skin, feeling everywhere. One hand traveled lower until he made it to your folds, groaning into the kiss when he felt how wet you were. He teased your entrance, enjoying the whine from your throat as he started pushing two fingers in you, swallowing your moans once he started thrusting them in and out of you.
He parted from your lips and went back to your neck, kissing and licking his way down to your chest before giving your nipples some attention. Your moans were loud now that you weren’t being muffled by his lips, your back arching into his mouth as he licked and sucked at one of your nipples before giving the other the same attention.
“Fuck, Theo!” You moaned. Your hands were gripping at the sheets, the neat fabric getting wrinkled in your grasp.
Theo moaned against your nipple in response, flicking his eyes up to your face to watch your reaction. He used his thumb to find your clit, rubbing circles on it as your eyes rolled back from the pleasure. It didn’t take much before your orgasm washed over you, making you cry out his name and have your body trembling.
He moved his body to bring his mouth onto your clit, his fingers never stopping inside you. The pleasure was starting to get overwhelming as you wrapped your fingers in his hair, cries and gasps leaving your mouth as he licked and sucked at your clit.
“Theo, please! ‘S Too much!” You whined, trying to pull away from him. His free hand stopped you, wrapping around your hips to keep you in place. “Shit! Oh my fuck!” You cried out from the overstimulation, the pleasure on the brink of being pain.
He wasn’t stopping, forcing another orgasm out of you as you cried and clawed at his scalp, which only made him hiss. He kept going, though. Any hopes of him slowing down or stopping were gone, all you could do was plead and cry. He worked you to another orgasm, this one nearly making you black out as it hit you.
“Fucking hell, cara mia. That was perfect. I need you to do that again for me.” He said and you raised your head to look at him, noticing the drenched sheets beneath you.
“What?” You asked, still dazed.
“I made you squirt. And you’re gonna do that again for me.” He smiled before leaning back down to lick at your clit again.
You whimpered and clung to his hair again, body fighting on if it wanted more or less from him. His arm around you wouldn’t let you decide anyways since it kept you from squirming further or closer to him. He easily brought you to another orgasm like he already knew your body. He helped you through it, not even minding that you soaked him again in your cum.
He finally let you go, standing up to push down his pants and chuck off his shirt before settling back between your legs, bringing them over his shoulders as he started easing his cock into you. You and him moaned together as he bottomed out, giving you a moment to adjust before beginning to thrust. “You take me so well, cara mia. Holy shit. You feel better than I ever imagined.”
Your mind was already blank from all the previous orgasms, no way you could respond other than with the moans and whimpers that left your mouth from how sensitive you were.
“Just one more for me, bella. Cum on my cock for me and we’ll be done. I just need it. I need to feel it.” He rambled, his hips pounding into yours, desperately trying to get both of you to cum.
With how sensitive you were, your orgasm came quickly, clenching his cock and sobbing. He praised you, wiping your tears as he helped ride out your orgasm.
“Sorry, principessa. Just one more. Please, just one more. I promise that’s it.” He said as he kept slamming into you, overworking your cunt.
“I can’t-I can’t, Theo! I can’t!” You cried.
“Just one more. I promise. Just give me one more. Fuck, you felt so good cumming around me, I just need to feel it one more time.” He said, gently kissing your leg on his shoulder.
He forced you into another orgasm before he finally came, filling your pussy with his cum.
“It’s okay, cara mia. We’re all done. You did so good for me.” He rested your legs on the bed and cupped your face, pressing soft kisses on your face.
Taglist:
@jeannie-beannie @yourenogoodforme @mixvchelle @helendeath @evaslytherpuff
@soaked4abby @hpnsfwaddict @mayamonroem @motherfing-stargirl @brittney-121
@dracoslovergirl @littlemadamred @mattheoriddlesbitch @acornacreacure @opheliamalfoy236
Let me know if you wanna be added!
#slytherin boys#slytherin boys x reader#slytherin boys smut#thedore nott x reader#theodore nott#theodore nott smut#theodore nott x reader smut
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SYMPATHY FOR THE DEVIL ♡
pairing: homelander x fem!reader
summary: homelander has taken an interest in you, vought's new intern. no matter how you look at it, as a good or bad thing, it ends the same way: him getting what he wants.
cw: nsfw (18+), smut, dubcon, p in v, oral (m receiving), body worship, sir kink, obsessive behavior, manipulation/coercion, age gap (reader in early 20s)
wc: 7.7k (oops lol)
a/n: hehe. never thought i would write for this man but it was pretty fun :) comm for my sweet beloved @gor3-hound love you so very much mwah mwah <33

At the junction of the V-shaped table, Homelander sat. With his back to the skyline and his gloved hands folded in front of him, he held the posture of a statue. Ashley had been rambling on and on and fucking on for the past five minutes about shit he couldn't care less about. Her nasally voice bounced off the tile floors and painted ceiling, ricocheting around him like a rogue bullet. Only his impregnable skin didn't protect him from the discomfort of this situation.
It was moments like these that really made him regret killing Stillwell.
That woman knew how to handle things. As manipulative as she could be, at least she wasn't absolutely insufferable. How could Stan let Ashley replace her? She was a poor excuse of just about everything. Absolutely spineless, unintelligent, reactionary, and opportunistic. He really couldn't picture any person on this Earth genuinely liking her.
However in the midst of his mental complaints, he realized that the annoying sound of her speaking was directed at him. All the other stares in the room were zeroed in on him too. A-Train observed in cautious silence. Noir's goggles reflected Homelander's own image right back at him. Maeve judged with a sideways glance. And Starlight prepared for the worst.
He tore his own bright blue eyes from the door opposite the table and refocused them on Ashley. They scanned over her thinning ginger locks down to her gaudy outfit - a piss poor attempt at imitating power.
"What?" he asked, his voice cutting through the air with a force similar to one of Maeve's swords.
Ashley blinked in return. Fear swirled in her wide eyes. She tried to maintain that empowered appearance she so desperately wished was real, but he could see the innate urge to cower bubbling within her.
"Was that lineup for the funeral ok with you, Homelander? A-Train and Noir open, Starlight sings, and then you close?" she repeated.
Now it was his turn to blink. Like he could actually give a shit about the order of segments for Translucent's funeral. He swallowed hard. While she projected a mirage of power, he had to do the same with level-headedness.
"That's fine, Ashley. Have those two go first, and Starlight can follow up with Amazing Grace or whatever shitty hymns they teach in that hick town she's from, and then I can finish us out," he responded.
He could see how her knuckles were going white around the edge of her clipboard. She gripped it for comfort, as if that could save her from his potential wrath. It only irritated him more. If he wanted her dead, he would turn her to ashes where she stood. How hard she braced herself in advance wouldn't matter in the slightest. But people could be so foolish in moments of terror.
"Well speaking of that," she said before clearing her throat, an attempt at a natural transition, "We were trying to decide what song she would sing. Maybe one of our originals? Or do you think it would be more tasteful to go with something from an outside source?"
Gritting his teeth, he buried the urge to unleash the bright beams of red from his sockets. His hands slid off one another and pressed down onto the cool table.
"Do you really need me to decide what song is going to send Translucent to the grave?" he replied, "I don't care what you play, and no one else attending will either. They'll be focused on working up some tears for the useless dipshit they never had the displeasure of knowing. Instead of trying to gain their approval, we should be working on finding the next member of the Seven who can replace him. There's no use dwelling on the past. We need to be preparing for the future."
He paused to let his words permeate the room, giving everyone a chance to absorb the sentiment and adapt accordingly. With his pupils still trained on Ashley, he planned on continuing his tirade, but his train of thought came to an abrupt halt.
Soft pitter-patters of footsteps clacked down the hall outside this room. They sounded in a delicate rhythm, only audible to him. As they grew louder, he caught the scent of the source too. Airy and light. A stark contrast to the brash perfume Ashley doused herself in.
The doors at the front of the room slid apart to reveal you.
You stood there for a moment. The realization that you'd interrupted something was visible in your eyes. The small spheres cast down as you wobbled in like a fawn that sensed wolves watching from nearby.
Ashley turned to face you, a glower already set on her features. The resentment she held for everyone else in this building awoke from its usual dormant slumber because there was finally someone weaker she could take it out on.
Once you reached her, your hand rose and gave her a thin stack of papers.
"I'm sorry for interrupting. It's a memo from 82. They made it sound urgent," you explained, everything about your temperament meek and timid.
After a brief pause to let you marinate in the few moments before your inevitable humiliation, she snatched the papers from you. Her eyes roamed over the page with disinterest. Even if the information conveyed by the small black letters was important, he doubted she would give it any reaction. She wanted to lash out, and she was going to, whether it was justified or not.
"They couldn't have emailed me this?" she snapped, as if that was something you could control.
"I don't know. I'm sorry. I'll check next time," you offered.
"You better or you'll run out of next times," she threatened, "Incompetence like this won't fly here. You're in the big leagues now, so act like it. Think before you do something instead of taking commands like a lap dog."
"I'm sorry," you replied, ducking your head again.
"Don't be sorry, just do better," she commanded.
"I will," you agreed.
"Good. Just get out of here now. Go pick up my lunch," she told you.
His lips curled into a scowl as he watched the scene play out. It was pathetic - not you, but Ashley. He hated seeing the fucking smirk on her face as you walked away. She had nothing to be smug about. She was nothing more than a feral coyote going after the scraps the other predators didn't take.
To make matters worse, when she returned her attention to the group at the table, she saw the look on his face. She saw the disdain, but instead of striking regret into her, it only deepened her sense of self-satisfaction.
She thought the look was for you. That he was disgusted with your mistake. Annoyed with your intrusion.
He couldn't have that. Not when that assumption was the farthest thing from the truth. Honestly, he didn't know if he was even capable of feeling such ire towards you. Not his precious little fawn.
Rising from his seat, his glare remained on Ashley. She did show a little fear then.
"You know, I don't have all day, Ashley. I'll open Translucent's funeral, Starlight will follow up with a song, and that will be it. A-Train and Noir can have the day off, because let's be honest, nobody will give shit either way," he mocked.
"But, sir-" she said, clearly confused by his sudden impending departure.
"I have more important things to deal with. If you need anything else, I'm sure one of the others can help you," he dismissed.
With that, he stepped back from the table and began heading to the doors. He hoped if he was fast enough he could still catch you. Even in a building as sleek and modern as this one, the elevators could be quite slow.
Walking out into the hall, his head swiveled in the direction you would have gone. For once, his own portrait didn't catch his eye. He didn't even think about stopping by Stillwell's office to reminisce. Instead, he just headed down towards the elevator. His red boots thudded across smooth tile in rapid succession, covering the path you'd just taken.
Finally, after a few feet, he spotted you. Bottom lip pulled between your teeth. Eyes glossy with embarrassment. Tip of your polished shoe tapping against the ground. You startled when his voice boomed across the space, calling out your name. So cute.
You looked at him with fear in your eyes, but disgust didn't fester in the pit of his stomach like it did when others gave him that anxious stare. Another feeling bloomed inside him, one he couldn't really place. It was just that the nervous gleam over your pupils didn't make him hate himself and all the circumstances of his life that put him in his position.
Instead, your wide eyes and pouty lips made him feel strong. You made him feel like a hero. A real one, not the artificial caricature that Vought projected to the world. With you nearby, he felt like the kind of guy who deserved the American flag blowing off his back with a pretty girl cradled in his arms and a dead enemy at his feet. When you gazed up at him, he could only imagine that the pride rushing through his chest and confidence pooling between his hips was the feeling his creators intended for him.
"Did you need something from me, sir?" you asked, reminding him that he actually had to provide a reason to talk to you. Just wanting to stare at you like a psychopath would not suffice unfortunately.
"Oh no," he waved off, "The meeting just finished up. I was heading out too. I saw you, and I realized I haven't really taken the time to get to know you yet, which is unfortunate because I usually like to be familiar with the newer people we have working with us."
A complete lie. Before you, he didn't remember ever giving any of the interns a second glance. They were true nuisances. They were Ashleys.
"Oh... well I'm around whenever you wanna talk. Ashley keeps me busy, but I'm sure I could make an exception for you," you replied.
"You absolutely can make an exception for me," he chuckled, "If Ashley gives you any trouble, just let me know, and I'll make sure she remembers who's really in charge around here."
It wasn't until he heard your heart rate increase that he realized those words probably came off as threatening. Well, they were threatening, but you weren't supposed to see him that way.
"I'm kidding," he forced out with a laugh, "Just joking around like I do... I just don't want you to worry about getting in some kind of trouble for me sniffing around you."
You huffed out an awkward laugh of your own and nodded. "I'll be sure to make some time for you in the future then and let Ashley know it was at your direction."
"Great," he said with probably too much enthusiasm.
His jaw clenched into one of his usual tight smiles. He averted his eyes from you and looked towards the numbers on the elevator. Fuck, it was reaching the bottom. He didn't want to let you go, but it wasn't like he could just stroll down the street with you to go get Ashley's lunch. His mind scrambled to come up with a solution.
But like your earlier intrusion into the meeting, your gentle voice cuts through the hurricane forming in his head.
"Are you alright, sir?" you ask, anxious concern written all over your features.
He refocused on you and nodded. His arm extended out behind you, his palm landing against the elevator wall. As he leaned in, he could smell your adrenaline spiking. He could hear the shift of your shoe against the ground. If only he possessed a sixth sense for the mind, so he could know what little thoughts about him were flitting through your head.
"I'm fine. You don't need to worry about me," he answered. He smiled down at you, observing the slight nod you gave him in return.
"Of course not. It probably seems silly coming from me," you said.
His brows raised in amusement. "What's that supposed to mean?" he asked.
He saw the flash of regret in your eyes. The one people always gave him when he asked a question in that tone. The one that came from the panic of realizing they may have said something that offended Homelander.
You suppressed it pretty well though and brought out a smile that gave the impression that you hoped he was messing with you instead.
"Well you know... because you're you," you said and tilted your head in an innocent way that made his chest ache.
He chuckled that charming, prepackaged laugh that had been trained into him. "Even I can appreciate someone taking an interest in checking on me," he replied.
It was maddening, how bad he wanted you. He wasn't even sure when this craving had sprouted inside him. He had been so preoccupied with his affinity for Stillwell that his fixation with you struck him like a glass window in front of a flying bird. But no matter the timeframe in which it blossomed, it had taken root by now and wasn't going to go away on its own.
When he looked at you like this - staring up at him with earnest fascination - his mind drifted to darker places all on its own. He couldn't stop it if he wanted to (and really, he didn't want to). It's just how was he not supposed to be aware of the fact that it would be all too easy to take you back to his room? How could he not think about what it would feel like to have your fragile body beneath his own in private? How could he not wonder what you'd sound like crying out in a sinful mix of pleasure and pain?
Hell, how was he supposed to pretend like he couldn't just bend you over and fuck you dumb right here in the middle of this elevator if he wanted to? No one would be able to stop him. There wouldn't be a thing they could do other than watch. They could stare in horror as he used you like he deserved, as he pounded into your warm, soft, dripping hole like he needed...
Unfortunately, painting that picture in his head had his blood rushing South. He felt the subtle simmer of desire in his pelvis, and he knew in no time his length would be filling out. This suit gave him no way of hiding it either. Clearly, whoever made it hadn't anticipated the Homelander popping a boner on the job.
But luckily for him, the elevator chimed with its arrival at the bottom floor. He straightened out as you looked ahead in preparation of your departure. But before you could go, he grabbed your arm. His touch was tender, holding the same force he'd use when cradling a baby at a photo-op.
"Maybe later tonight you'd like to take me up on one of those talks? After you're done for the day, you could stop by my place. The sooner the better, right?" he asked.
Your eyes widened ever so slightly, but you still nodded. "Um... sure thing. I'll head up once I've finished all my work. It should be around six if that's ok?" you offered.
"Yeah, that works for me. I'll be waiting," he said in an attempt to be playful.
You smiled once more and then headed out of the elevator. His fingertips dragged down your arm to your wrist as you walked away before you finally slipped from his grasp. He could hear your heart pounding faster than your footsteps as you headed towards the exit of the building.
At six o'clock sharp, a knock sounded through his penthouse. And it only took him a few seconds to swing the door open and greet you.
"There she is," he beamed with exaggerated politeness.
You smiled modestly in return, shrugging and smoothing out a crease in your blouse. "I couldn't let the leader of the seven down," you joked.
He scoffed but opened the door wider, beckoning you into his place. You took the invitation and crossed the threshold. Your eyes glanced around the place, taking note of all the things in the apartment that housed the most powerful man on Earth.
The American flag taking up an entire wall almost stopped you in your tracks. It would've been funny if it was someone else, but because it belonged to him, it stood there like a warning. You tried not to show how daunting you found it. Average people could be touchy about that famous piece of cloth. You didn't want to find out if the strongest supe felt the same through means of offending him.
In place of letting that bother you, you shifted your attention over to all the historical pictures hanging on the walls and the sleek surfaces and drawers filled with things you couldn't begin to imagine. Your eyes casted over the statues accenting the space as well. It was all so very polished. It looked like what you'd expect the Homelander entry in an Ikea catalog to be.
"So what do you think?" he asked. He knew his words came off as stiff. Probably a little stilted sounding. He just couldn't help it. For the first time, he couldn't get a read on how you felt through physical signs alone. And right now, he really really wanted you to like him.
"It's... impressive," you answered.
But he could hear the hesitation in your voice. In each word, there was the same wavering quality to it that you get when Ashley grilled you in front of an audience. It wasn't the precious reverence that he saw in the elevator. The nervous kind of admiration you held for someone above your standing. This was just plain anxiety, and that served no purpose to him.
Despite your trepidation however, you walked forward to the window at the back of the place. You looked out over the city in awe.
"I would love to live somewhere high up like this," you said.
He came up from behind to stand next to you in front of the glass panes. His eyes landed on your face. You stared out the window, wonder twinkling in your eyes. Your voice sounded almost breathless. It was adorable.
"No fear of heights?" he asked.
"Not when it comes to being inside. Maybe I'd be nervous if we were on a balcony or something," you replied.
"Oh come on. You'd have nothing to worry about if you were with me. I'd never let you fall," he said, dropping his voice a few octaves.
You made that cute little face again when those words hit your ears. Your eyes widened before they fell to look at your shoes. So modest, the way you shied away. He wondered if you were always so timid or if it was only when a god amongst men like himself flirted with you.
He chuckled and reached out, tilting your chin back up to look at him. "You don't need to be nervous," he soothed, "There's no safer place to be than with the Homelander, right?"
You nodded right along. His words left no room for objection.
"Good girl," he smirked and dragged a gloved thumb over your cheek. He pulled his hand back and stepped in the direction of the brown leather sectional that sat in the middle of the room.
"Come over here and sit down. We can talk," he directed.
Following him to the large couch, you took your seat near the corner. You assumed he'd sit at the other end or at least towards the middle of the perpendicular cushions, but no. He sat down in the corner with you. His body was at most a foot away.
He continued to smile at you though he didn't speak. It felt odd, sitting there in silence across from him. He wasn't doing anything overtly threatening, yet you still felt at his mercy.
"So, do you like it here so far? Do you feel like you're fitting into the Vought family?" he asked with a bit of an edge to that second word.
You nodded again. A relieved breath seeped from your lungs as the tense void in conversation came to an end. "Yeah, it's nice here. I feel like I'm learning a lot."
He chuckled and leaned back against the stiff backing of the sofa. His muscular arm draped along the top. Though it wasn't his intention to draw your focus there, he caught the way your eyes dragged over his bicep.
"That's good," he said, "It can be a lot when you're new. I wouldn't want you feeling overwhelmed."
"That's nice of you. I appreciate it, but I'm used to a busy schedule," you replied.
"You're freshly graduated, aren't you?" he checked.
"Yeah," you said, your lips quirking upwards at his guess.
"I thought so. You have that cute, wide-eyed, optimistic thing going for you."
A small laugh leaves your lips. "I know. Ashley said I'll grow out of it by the end of this quarter."
His face dropped, and he almost abandoned the prince charming act he was attempting to pull off for you. The mere mention of Ashley was enough to irk him, but the thought that she was trying to change you? Not only change you but jade you. To strip away the soft and sweet qualities that hooked him on you in the first place. It was criminal. He couldn't hide his disdain.
"You shouldn't listen to her," he said. He wasn't angry, but his cadence held intensity. "Ashley's problem is Ashley. To be honest, I don't even know why they gave her an intern. It's not like she'd be good at teaching anything when she still doesn't understand most things about our business herself."
Your fingers dug into the edge of your seat. It wouldn't have been significant in a normal conversation, but when speaking with a man who could hear a pin drop forty stories down, he noticed.
"You're still nervous," he observed.
In an instant, your hands flew to your lap, like you knew what gave your anxiety away. You fidgeted with the hem of your skirt and shrugged.
"A little," you admitted.
"Are you scared of me?" he asked.
You shook your head without even thinking about the question.
"No, it's not that. I swear," you reassured, "It's just that this is a big deal for me. I'm really honored you want to get to know me, and I just want to make a good impression."
"You don't need to worry about that. I wouldn't have invited you here if I didn't have a good impression of you," he said.
You sighed slightly, letting out a bit of tension, but he could still smell that boosted cortisol running through your blood.
"Come here," he ordered, his voice soft but undeniably firm.
"What?" you asked.
A puff of amused air blew from his nostrils. "Come here," he repeated, "Sit closer."
As if you needed the guidance, he patted the space directly beside his hip. He could see the uncertainty in your eyes even after the gesture. The lack of understanding toward his reasoning persisted. Regardless of your skepticism however, you scooted in his direction and ended up where he wanted you.
"That's better," he said.
With careful fingers, he slipped the glove off his right hand. Your eyes locked on it in subtle awe. You'd seen this man on billboards and commercials for years. His face dominated newscasts. His voice broadcast over the radio on a weekly basis. Still, you had never seen such a human part of him. Five fingers and a palm reaching for your own.
They clasped around your hand. His skin was smooth. The gloves preserved them from any marks of experience.
"Did Ashley warn you about me?" he asked, drawing your eyes back to his own.
Your heart thundered, but you couldn't lie. Never had Vought bragged about Homelander being a human lie detector, but in this moment, you felt like that was the case.
"Yes," you responded.
He clicked his tongue in disapproval. "You didn't believe her, did you?" he asked.
You could tell he already knew the answer. He just wanted to hear it.
"Yes," you whispered again.
"What did she tell you?"
It was hard to remember that conversation you'd had a few weeks ago with Ashley. Feeling like you were two seconds away from having lasers beamed through your skull made minute details fuzzy and distant, but you manage to choke a few out anyways.
"She said that you have a very specific vision for the Seven, and that you'll do anything to make your dreams reality. She was just saying you're ambitious. That you care about the greater good," you summarized.
"I have a feeling you're saying it a lot nicer than she did," he teased. He could feel the fear rolling off of you in waves, and in a moment, he would rectify that. But for right now, he didn't mind letting his precious little fawn tremble in terror for a few moments more.
"Yeah, she can be kind of blunt," you said with a shaky laugh.
"That's one word for it," he said.
"She's not gonna get in trouble because of what I said, is she?" you asked.
He couldn't help laughing at that. The sound came out low and throaty. You were just so fucking pure. Worried about protecting someone who wouldn't hesitate for a second to sell you out if it meant she could climb up another rung on the corporate ladder.
His exposed thumb rubbed back and forth over your knuckles. "No. Of course not. We're just talking," he said.
He leaned in closer to you, positioning his mouth in close proximity to your ear. His free hand came up to cup your jaw.
"I appreciate your honesty though. Ashley probably couldn't tell you this, but I appreciate a loyal girl like you," he murmured.
On both your hand and through his glove in contact with your chin, he could feel your skin heat up.
"Oh... thank you, sir," you said.
He chuckled. His fingers squished into the flesh of your cheeks, making your lips puff out as though they were seeking a kiss.
"So polite, but I like that. We need more people here who understand their place," he said.
At this point, the gravity of your circumstances began to settle on you. Your fear had worn off a bit, and you realized what a compromising position he had you in. With one tight squeeze, he could crush every bone in your face.
Out of instinct, you tried pulling back a little. You didn't make it obvious, only attempting to gain a few inches of space.
That was a few inches too many though. He tightened his grip and kept you where he wanted you.
"Ah ah," he tutted, "How many times do I have to tell you that you don't need to be scared? I'm not going to hurt you."
You dropped the resistance right then and there. It wasn't worth pursuing. If he didn't want you getting away, you weren't getting away.
He took a few more seconds to study your face, taking in every minutiae of your expressions. Then, his hands dropped to your waist, and he pulled you into his lap. His thighs were firm against your ass, both rigid in how he carried himself and defined from the pure muscle that made them up.
His hands smoothed up and down your sides, coasting over each crease in your blouse. He massaged your soft tissue with gentle squeezes from the beginning of your bra down to the swell of your hips.
"God, you're beautiful," he muttered, "You fit here like you were made for me."
You vibrated in his grasp. He could feel the way you quivered with the urge to pull away.
"Thank you, s-sir," you stammered, "I really appreciate it but-"
"But nothing," he cut you off.
"But I don't think we should be... doing this," you tried to continue anyway.
"Why not?" he asked. Though his tone made it obvious that no matter what reason you provided, it wouldn't change his mind.
"Because you're like my boss, y'know? And I worked really hard to get my spot here, and I don't want people thinking I slept my way to where I am," you explained, "You're really nice, and I admire you a lot, but it wouldn't be right."
He didn't respond immediately. He paused and let your words hang in the air for a few moments.
"You know," he finally spoke, "I don't think you understand how things work around here. It doesn't matter what anyone else in this building thinks. Only me."
You blinked at him, unsure of how to respond to such an assertion. It didn't matter though. He continued without your input.
"What I do with you, how I feel about you - no one else will know about it unless you tell them. But even if you do and even if they care, there isn't a thing they'll do about it. There's not a thing they can do about it," he continued.
"I still don't think it's a good idea," you maintained.
"Good thing this isn't for you to think about then," he mocked, "You're a fast learner. You'll figure it out soon enough. I am God in this tower. And a god doesn't listen to his subjects. He guides them. He knows best."
One of his hands slid up your tummy and over your chest onto your throat. He cupped your jaw and swiped his thumb back and forth across your bottom lip.
"What did Ashley tell you about me?" he asked.
"That no one gets in your way."
"Good. And she was right. No one gets in my way. Nothing stops me from getting what I want. And I've wanted you for too fucking long not to try you out."
That set of fingers on your chin pulled your face towards his and brought you into a kiss. You froze against his lips. It felt as though all of time stopped. This high up, you couldn't hear the sounds of the city outside the penthouse. No one existed in this moment but you and him.
Unlike you, he melted into the exchange. He sighed against your skin and pulled you flush against his toned body. After a second to let you come to terms with what was happening, he kissed you again. His lips sucked on yours gently, attempting to coax you into returning the affection.
The most he got is you puckering them up ever so slightly.
He pulled away with frustration in his eyes and grabbed your face, jerking you a little to look at him.
"Don't act like you don't want this. I know you do," he said, "You're scared, but you don't need to be. Relax and let yourself enjoy this. It's not everyday that the most powerful man on earth wants to fuck you."
Your eyes blew up like little saucers, but before you could really process the directness of what he'd said, he was kissing you again. This time it wasn't as nerve wracking. You softened up a little and kissed back.
You didn't put much effort into it. Your lips responded like this was a juvenile first date. But he didn't let up. He didn't let you give him anything less than your best. His hands roamed across your body. They groped and fondled your breasts and then migrated South to feel up your ass through your pencil skirt.
Your muscles started to loosen up after a minute or so. You told yourself this wasn't so bad. He was being gentle so far, and for someone with his abilities, you wanted it to stay that way. You brought your hand up to his face and cupped his cheek. With that as leverage, you deepened the kiss.
He groaned as soon as you started to give in. His hands fell to your hips and tugged you so that you were straddling him. He smacked your ass, the sound echoing around his apartment. You could tell he held back. A real spank from Homelander could shatter your hip, but this one barely even stung. Maybe he did like you.
His fingers came up and with a sharp tug, he popped the front of your top loose. The column of buttons sprung free. The strips of cloth fell away to each of your sides, exposing a sliver of your skin. He furthered it by pulling off the garment entirely. His eyes trailed along your bare shoulders to your collar bone before finally landing on your breasts. He gave them a firm squeeze, kneading them through the barrier of your bra.
Meanwhile you rolled your hips down on his lap. Immediately, you felt his bulge that had risen to attention between your thighs. You did it again and then again. Each time you ground yourself against him with more pressure.
He grunted, and his eyes fluttered. His hands returned to your waist and gripped you hard, guiding your movements. He seemed transfixed for a few moments, as if he couldn't decide his next move.
After a few seconds though, he got his momentum back. He yanked you off his lap and flipped over so that you were seated on the couch again.
He rose to his feet before you. There your eyes scanned over his body from his tousled blond hair and his kiss-swollen red lips to his sculpted abdomen and his swelling erection. You reached out to touch him, but he stopped your hand mid-air.
Once your arm was limp on the couch again, he removed his other glove. He dropped it to the floor before bringing his right boot to the spot on the sofa next to you. He unzipped the red shoe and then discarded it like he had with the other item. The other boot followed the same routine.
"I don't let just anyone see me like this," he told you as his fingers began to undo his collar, "You should feel lucky."
Lucky wasn't the word you would use to describe your feelings in this situation. Maybe special. Or distinct. Individual. Either way, you continued to watch. Your eyes glided over his figure as he pulled away the tight blue costume that seemed like a second-skin for how much he wore it.
His defined chest came into view. Your reluctance hadn't vanished all together just yet, but at this point, it was fading fast. Pale hair dusted the muscular expanse and trailed down his stomach to the waistband of the bottoms. The waistband he soon hooked his fingers over and peeled down.
He dropped the scaled navy fabric to the ground before kicking it away, leaving himself in just a small pair of boxers. His hand came down and rubbed the swollen tent at the front while his eyes lingered on you.
"Do you want to touch?" he asked.
You nodded. It wasn't a hard decision. This was still a bad idea. You hadn't changed your mind on that. But at this point, what else was there to do? Defying Homelander wasn't an option for anyone on this planet ever. You were no different.
"Ask," he commanded.
"Please can I touch you?" you said.
"Please what?"
"Please, sir. Can I touch you?"
"Good girl," he praised before nodding, "Go for it."
You reached out, this time successfully. Your palm landed flat on his stomach. You held it there for a moment, just feeling his skin. In a way, it was unreal. To feel that someone propped up on the world's pedestal was flesh and blood like you.
Rubbing up and down, you continued getting a feel for his body. He smirked at your wonder before guiding you up by the elbow.
"Stand up and do it right," he said.
"Sorry."
The word came from your mouth automatically. You brought your other hand up to his chest and felt the muscles in his chest. Everything was so built. You expected that, but it was still odd to feel beneath your fingertips. He felt like a living ken doll. You almost didn't believe if he dropped his boxers there would be a real cock there.
Your hands traced up to his shoulders with precision. They explored down his biceps and forearms. And then finally, you brought your lips into his chest. He sighed and tilted his head back, relishing the feeling.
You kissed all over, swirling your tongue and tracing shapes onto his skin. It was almost entrancing, to be so focused on someone like this. You barely noticed as he turned the two of you and sat himself down on the couch, lowering you to your knees.
You worked your mouth down his abs, licking and kissing the twitching muscles. Your fingernails scraped up his sides and then down onto his thighs. When your lips reached the waistband of his boxers, your eyes glanced up at him.
"Can I take them off, sir?" you asked.
He smirked at the title. Only one word of correction and he'd trained that phrase into you.
"Yes," he answered. It was a simple answer. All that was required for someone so naturally obedient.
You took it in stride, tucking your fingers over the elastic and tearing them down. His hard cock popped up and slapped against his pelvis. You couldn't have been happier about your earlier ken doll theory being proven wrong. The sight of his dick was enough to make you drool. It was better than any work of art out there.
It rested against his body at the perfect length, the perfect girth. The tip flushed beautiful red and pearly white beads of precum smeared at the top. Your fingers wrapped around it and gave it a few strokes, testing the waters.
His hand came down and petted your head. He watched as you studied the appendage, as you experimented with your own touch. It was so fucking cute he thought he might cum right then and there. Fuck, he thought you were sweet every moment he had eyes on you, but right now, you were darling. You were doing as he said. Accepting your place at the feet of a superior being.
"Put it in your mouth," he said from above, "I want you to taste it."
There was no hesitation on your end this time around.
"Yes sir," you responded before leaning forward and wrapping your lips around his cock.
He groaned and let his chest hollow out with a harsh exhale. Your mouth was so warm and wet, nice and snug around his length. He rocked his hips up, pushing it further into your throat. He expected a small gag or sputter, but instead you moaned. You shut your eyes and flattened your tongue against his shaft before beginning to bob your head.
"Fuck," he hissed. His legs tensed up, and he pressed down on your head. That did get a tiny gag out of you. You gripped his hips to stabilize yourself though and stayed in place. Your nose nestled against the darker curls of hair that sat at the base of his cock.
Spit leaked from your mouth and dribbled onto his skin below. He took a few moments to just enjoy the feeling of his dick down your throat. The sight of his sweet, innocent girl choking on his cock. Then he let you pull off and catch your breath.
You took a few deep puffs, letting the spots clear from your vision before you dove back in for more. Your hand stroked the lower part of him your mouth didn't cover in its shallow sucks while your other set of fingers caressed his balls tenderly.
He'd never experienced devotion. As much as it pained him to ever acknowledge, his sexual experiences had been lackluster up until now. There were the times with Maeve, but they always left something to be desired for him. Then there was the time with Stillwell that ended before it really started. In either case, no one had ever put all of themselves into pleasuring him like you were doing right now. It drove him wild. He could feel his sac tightening up, and he knew he had to get you off.
Planting one hand on each side of your head, he tugged you back. You looked up at him with glossy, cock-drunk eyes and saliva-coated lips. He swiped some of the mess away before addressing you.
"You're doing so good for me, but I think you're ready for more, don't you?"
"Yes, sir," you agreed.
"My perfect pet," he crooned and pulled you up onto the couch.
He laid you flat on your back and ripped your skirt and panties off in one go. His eyes drank in the sight of your nude lower half, but he didn't spend much time savoring it. He spread you out, slotting himself against your center.
With a few rocks of his hips, he dragged his length through your wetness. He let the sticky fluid coat his shaft, and then he sunk in. His tip bullied its way into your entrance and the rest of him followed. You whined at the stretch. Your walls clamped around him, eager to accept the intrusion.
"Atta girl," he grunted as he worked himself all the way in.
His hips connected with your ass, but he still bucked them, trying to get more. You yelped at the force. He was already buried inside you. Anymore and his tip would be nudging the entrance to your womb.
Fortunately for you, he pulled his hips back, giving you a short break from feeling so full. It was short lived though. Seconds later he snapped back in. That began the quick rhythm he set into. It was desperate and needy, emotions he'd tried to hide until this point.
You whimpered as your body bobbed with the momentum. His thrusts bounced you back and forth. The sounds of his body smacking against yours filled the room. His fingers dug into your waist hard enough to bruise. You didn't complain about the minor pain though because you could tell he was holding back in every other regard. If a few marks on your side kept you from being pulverized by a super cock, then that was a burden you were willing to carry.
Above you, he starts to pant. His breaths leave him raggedly huffing, sucking down what oxygen he can get in the midst of rutting into you. He tilts his head down at you and gazes at your blissed out face with lidded eyes.
"I could have anyone. Any person on this Earth would be mine if I wanted them to be. But the only one I want is you. Doesn't that feel good?" he breathed.
"Yes!" you cried out. Your back arched up off the couch. "Feels so fucking good, sir."
He leaned into you more, squishing your body into the surface below. Your thighs pressed against your tummy as he bent you.
"Yeah, it does," he grunted, "It's all there is. It's all you need to think about. How you're all mine."
"Mhm," you whined with a lazy nod. You were getting closer to cumming and responding to his words was taking a lower priority in your mind.
"And to think you tried to deny yourself of it," he mocked. He clenched his jaw and slammed into you harder.
You shrieked and clutched his shoulders. In the back of your mind, you hoped his penthouse was sound proofed or at least enough distance from the nearest one. Otherwise you wouldn't have to tell anyone about this incident for it to spread throughout the tower.
"I knew better, didn't I? I knew this is what you needed," he said.
Again, you nodded. You felt the heat in your belly reaching the boiling point.
"Say it," he huffed.
You tried to force it out, but your own hiccuped sob of pleasure cut you off. He didn't give you a break though. He stared down at you with expectation, so you continued.
"You know best- uh, fuck- you know best, sir," you whined.
"Good fucking girl," he growled on top of you.
He was already close from the blowjob you'd given him. Only a few strokes more, and he was ready to explode. He swiveled his hips, angling them upwards to pound into that special spot that would make you see stars and stripes.
You mewled when you came. Your body trembled harder than it did when you were scared. Arousal gushed out of you and coated his skin. He huffed and buried his face in your neck before letting go.
Everything faded into the background as you laid underneath him in the haze that came after the absolute high of pleasure. Now you could feel his heartbeat too. The organ thundered against his chest over and over as he came down.
Minutes later he pulled back. His knuckles caressed down your jawline before he climbed off of you entirely. He sat back on the couch and let out a deep breath. You weren't sure whether you were supposed to pick up your stuff and leave or follow along with him and stay close to his side. There was no real indication of what he wanted in this moment, but he turned to smile at you and huffed out a laugh.
"I think I'll keep you with me more often now. Really show you the ropes of fitting in around here."
You sat up and nodded awkwardly. He leaned toward you, cupping your cheek.
"I'll be a much better teacher than Ashley ever was," he said. His arm snaked around you and pulled you to his chest again. "No more errands or coffee runs. I'll show you things you need. Things that you'll enjoy."
He ran his fingers over your face and kissed your temple. The touches were tender against your skin. They would have been romantic if your mind wasn't racing with what this all meant in terms of your job and the grand scheme of your future.
Looking at him though, he wasn't worried at all. He smiled down at you before whispering once more.
"My sweet little pet. All mine now."
#homelander x reader#homelander x you#homelander x y/n#homelander smut#the boys x you#the boys x reader#the boys smut#ch: homelander 💌
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Can i get a "Have you seen my- oh," with your roommates johnny and simon who're dating?
Specifically Johnny, because we all know he has house training, just chooses to never show it.
It's midday, you're off from work and you're aching to relieve some stress. Around this time is when Johnny gets ready to go to the gym, so you lock your door and pull your pants down.
Your nerves are stretched thin from work, the heavy traffic, your boss that won't get off your ass about a project that's due 2 weeks from now.
And you haven't gotten laid since the guys moved in- so about a year ago. It doesn't help that they're both too good looking and the icing on that cake is that they're dating each other.
You also feel wrong imagining that it's their hands that touch your chest and slick cunt, but nothing gets you off faster, nowadays.
so with a slightly guilty conscience, your hand travels down to your sex, and begins to draw small, light circles on your bundle of nerves, and slowly sink two clever fingers into your swollen entrance.
The door busts wide open, knob slamming into the back wall. "Hey, bonnie, have you seen my- oh."
You locked the fucking door. Right?
"The door wasn't locked," he quickly explains, but his eyes don't stray from where your hand is.
"I'm sure it wasn't, Johnny. Now please get the fuck out."
He instead steps inside, gently closing the door behind him.
Uh oh.
"Need a hand? Ah promise I'm good with them. My mouth too, ask Simon."
Johnny also doesn't wait for you to answer, just brazenly walks to the corner of the bed and crawls his way over until his warm breath fans over your bare pussy.
"Jus' helpin' a friend in need, aye?"
He moves your hand, hissing when he sees thick strings of arousal on your fingertips and licks a flat stripe from your hole to your swollen clit.
oop.
When Simon comes back from whatever the hell he was doing, you're already asleep in your room, drained from the amount of peaks he brought you to with his fingers and tongue.
Johnny drags Simon into the bedroom and pulls him in for a kiss; sliding his tongue into Simon's mouth.
Simon moans when he gets a taste of what he just knows is you.
Heady arousal is strong on Johnny's tongue- and Simon throbs in his pants, yearning for more.
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rumors — ft. kamisato ayato
@ficsforgaza kinktober day 3 — kamisato ayato + creampie
synopsis: you hear people whisper about the one thing you and ayato lack. an heir. your husband is more than happy to silence those whispers with his own methods
includes: 1.6k word count (i tried to keep it short i’m sorry it exceeded the limit) ; female wife reader ; 18+ mature content (no minors!) ; talks of pregnancy and children ; implied arranged marriage ; fingering, unprotected vaginal sex ; creampie ; slight breeding kink thrown in too oops
notes: @resibonin manuuuu my love tysm for indulging me with a request like this i was so excited when i was told what jr was <3 i hope i did your request justice and tysm for donating to this cause!! <3
“There’s something troubling you,” Ayato hums.
You send a fleeting glance at his figure. He’s sat at the desk he’s placed in the corner of your shared chamber as he looks up from his papers to meet your eyes. It’s to be closer to you, he’d said the night he set it up, beaming proudly at himself. Ayato does not like to do work in his office when you are sitting alone in bed. He finds it troublesome to concentrate when his mind drifts to you.
Ironically, he hardly ever does any work when he’s near you, too.
“What do you mean?” You set your book down, raising an eyebrow.
He quirks his lips up into a knowing smile, one that makes you feel shy already as he purrs, “I can see it on your face. There is something on your mind.”
He’s right. There is something on your mind. Regrettably, word spreads in Inazuma quickly.
You’ve heard…rumors. They mainly target you. Often about your ability to carry an heir, perhaps, or even your willingness to. You’ve heard them through hushed whispers in the estate and through loud conversations while passing in town.
It’s not true, of course. You’re not unwilling nor unable. In fact, you think an heir would be nice—it’s just that you have yet to discuss such matters with Ayato.
(You don’t know how to. It’s easier with Ayaka than it is with your own husband to discuss the future of your marriage potentially taking place. You don’t know if it’s time to take the step yet—your wedding was a small, quiet affair and arranged quickly enough that you didn’t fall for Ayato until some time into your marriage. It only made sense at the time to have the maids fetch you tea from the sakura blossom after things turned more…intimate in your development with Ayato.)
You love him, though—as does he love you. So much so, that he notices the signs of something wrong before you’re even aware you’re projecting them.
“I’ve just been thinking of the public, is all,” you say vaguely. You should know by now Ayato would never settle for accepting that.
“What about them, my dear wife?”
“Th-they speak, my lord,” you whisper, not meeting his gaze. Equal parts because you have a sense of shame (that Ayato does not) and equal parts because he will surely be amused should you look into his eyes.
You’re right—you can hear the amusement in his tone when he murmurs, “Is that so? And what, pray tell, do they speak about?”
“Us,” you huff indignantly. “They…have much to discuss when it comes to our matters.”
“We are deeply influential people in this nation, my dear,” he chuckles. You throw him a glare that he easily grins wider at, “Surely, a few comments about political cornerstones such as ourselves are to be expected?”
“But they’re shamelessly invasive, Ayato,” you all but squawk. If not for your mother’s strict lessons of primness, you’re certain you’d have lost your composure on your husband far earlier into this conversation.
His eyes narrow playfully, a sort of look on his face you don’t like. He has an upper hand you can’t quite put your finger on—but he’s a step ahead. That much you know.
“Tell me, my dear. What is it that they speak of that crosses these boundaries you’re so worried about? Tell me and I shall handle it so my precious wife can rest in peace. I wouldn’t want it to keep you up at night.”
“Very funny, Ayato,” you spit. You don’t meet his gaze as you opt for staring at your fingers, fiddling them in your lap as you mumble quietly, “They…they speak of an heir, my lord. M-more specifically, the lack of…the lack of one being conceived by…”
“By who?” He plays dumb, eyes sparkling as you glare at him sharply.
“By us, you utter fool,” you throw your hands up. Your mother would be truly disappointed in your slip of composure, but Ayato has a fierce way of settling under your skin.
An itch you’ll never reach no matter how deep your nails sink into your skin.
“Ah,” he nods slowly, “So they’ve taken to commenting on the lack of our children, is that it?”
“Yes,” you hiss. “And I do not appreciate it.”
“Then I shall have to dirty my hands and fix this issue, no?”
Your eyes twinkle at that, finally happy with the words of your husband as you nod earnestly. “Yes, my darling husband. It would be very much appreciated should you put an end to these abysmally shameless comments.”
“Alright then,” he grins wickedly.
A part of you feels a bit bad for the poor victim of Ayato’s problem solving process. He’s a bit swift with the punishment he deals—and effective too, when it comes from the shadows. People fear what they cannot control. Your husband is one of those things.
Except he does not seem to take matters into his hands the way you expect him to. He’s standing, walking up to you where you sit on the bed, eyes hungry and predatory in a way you’re all too familiar with, and all too unprepared for.
“What—what are you…” you stutter as he hovers over you, his lips slowly kiss up your neck, settling against your pulse point to suck gently.
“I am dirtying my hands to solve the problem,” he murmurs, voice deep and sultry enough that you shiver from the sound alone. “If, perhaps…there is an heir inside of you…well, you see what I mean, don’t you? The comments will surely have to cease.”
“W-what? B-but—”
“Ayaka tells me you often think of the joys of motherhood. You seem particularly fond of a child with my eyes, it seems? Perhaps you should indulge your husband of such desires instead of your sister-in-law. After all, I am much more fit to offer a remedy to your longing.”
“Oh,” you gasp, just as his fingers wander up the edge of your gown and slip past your panties, sinking into your cunt. “P-please…”
“Please what? Give you an heir? One with my eyes and your smile, perhaps?” He teases.
You nod. Desperately so. Ayato can tease you all he wants, you decide—he might feel like he’s won some one sided battle by pushing at your buttons, but in the end the building pressure between your legs feels like a much larger win.
And it is. You cum on his fingers easily—partly because he’s good with them. Good with you. He knows what you like and where you like it, just like a dutiful husband.
So, like a dutiful wife, you spread your legs and accommodate him. His cock is hard, leaking with a generously large amount of pre cum that you know is not a coincidence. He shivers as the tip pushes past your folds, a low, breathy groan that he lets out right against the shell of your ear as he bottoms out.
“Fuck,” he curses, “You are divine, do you know? You feel it too.”
“Less talking,” you whine, “Move, Ayato.”
“As you wish,” he laughs. It’s a sweet sound—despite his ability to irk you often, you are quite fond of your husband. In love with him, even—enough so, that simple joy on his face makes a flutter in your belly that you’re sure he feels through a particularly tight squeeze around his cock.
He groans, letting out soft, labored pants against your ear as his hips thrust sharply into you, the thick head of his cock nudging past your folds and burying deep into the spongy spot in the back that he has memorized.
“More, more, more—” you chant, “‘M s-so close—”
“Already?” He gasps, a smug, lopsided smirk on his lips. You glare up at him before wrapping your legs around his waist, pulling him into your cunt deeper. Closer. Harder.
“O-oh, Gods,” he moans, stuttering his hips for a moment before they fuck into you harsher, a sloppy and quicker pace that lacks his earlier rhythm. His tip angles to hit sensitive parts of you that only Ayato discovers.
He’s close, you can tell by the sloppy tempo of his thrusts. You’re closer, and you know he can tell because he quickens that tempo if only a little.
It’s enough to make pleasure erupt a second time, rolling through hot waves along your body as your walls flutter around him. They squeeze him tight—enough that he whines before releasing his own cum into you.
“I shall fill you to the brim,” his voice is low. There’s a promise in his tone as he continues, “As many times as I have to. Until you are walking around this estate swollen with my child for all to know that I’ve done this. Me.”
“You,” you agree through a whimper, clenching around him at the words. “F-fill me up, Ayato.”
Thick and hot, his seed fucks deep into your walls, sharp thrusts of his twitching cock burying it further and further until you’re sure being full of his seed even just this once will leave you swollen with his child. He seems to think it, too, because his eyes are transfixed between your bodies, dazed as he watches the mess of his cum leaking from your cunt and dripping down your thigh in a thick, slow rivulet.
“Had your fill?” You ask tiredly when he finally finishes, slowing to a stop. You roll your eyes as he throws you a wolfish grin.
“Perhaps for now,” he drawls, “I shall stay inside of you like this for a bit to ensure it takes.” He presses his hips closer to yours, softening cock burying deeper into your cunt for emphasis as he sinks his weight over you. You roll your eyes and bury your hand into his sweaty hair.
“So what takes?”
“My seed, of course,” he says as though it’s obvious.
“Ayato!” You squeal, slapping at his shoulder as he laughs.
“Be sure to let the maids know that you will not be needing the sakura blossom tea. Or perhaps…perhaps I’ll tell them myself—they’re good at gossiping. You might not have to worry about the comments of the public for long.”
“You are exceedingly troublesome, my darling husband.”
“Do you love me for it?”
“Unfortunately, I do,” you grin. He kisses you, and you can’t help but melt and reciprocate—in the future, it might be difficult to enjoy such moments of intimacy should a child be born.
You figure you should enjoy your husband while he’s yours alone for as long as you can.
I think this is slightly more plot build up than it is smut. The smut was rushed for the sake of the word count limit so this definitely isn’t my best piece but I hope it was still a decent read </3
#ayato x reader#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#ayato x you#genshin x you#genshin impact x you#ayato smut#genshin smut#genshin impact smut#kamisato ayato x reader#kamisato ayato x you#kamisato ayato smut#meowdei.writing
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the party



PART TWO OF THE PROJECT / part one ⭑.ᐟ ★ pairing: softdom!bangchan x inexperiencedfem!reader
✦summary: The inevitable closeness and attraction with Chan is still there, once he can finally touch you, it only remains for him to show you slowly a little bit of his world.
♡ genre - warnings: MDNI 18+, smut, college au, grinding, clitplay, fingering, handjob, mutual masturbation, piv, pet names, hints of fluff.
word count: 8.2k
miniplaylist: house of balloons by the weeknd / 2 on by tinashe / collide by justine skye / lost in the fire by the weeknd / connected by bang chan
masterlist - taglist ୭ ˚. ᵎᵎ
a/n: i made it fluffier than it should be oops
After that night of released tensions, there was nothing but an obvious closeness between you and Chan, moments after you finished with your first oral sex, he saw you, so confused with such a sweet expression for him, tired, trying to recover, so wet between your orgasm and his saliva, so he held back, held back so much from not fucking you at that very moment, from pulling his cock out and waiting to be satisfied, so he only admired your exposed pussy once more, your body moving and closing your legs slightly slowly, him with such a sweet but arrogant smile. Chan wiped his mouth to approach you and give you a small kiss on your forehead, feeling close to him your agitated complexion and heavy breathing, you couldn't think of anything else but to regain your stability, but at the same time you wondered anxiously if after all the foreplay Chan would dare to fuck you. But you forgot it all once you felt a tender kiss on your face instead.
“Get some rest, baby, let's finish tomorrow, okay?” he whispered to you, shuddering every part of your sensitive body.
You assumed he was talking about the project. You obeyed him, cleaning up your little mess and did something you never thought you would do, at least not now, as unexpectedly as your hot encounter was, you offered him to sleep over at your apartment, a proposal which Chan accepted with much joy, his heart beating out of his chest, simply because he liked you too much, seeing him in such a sweet act as he read your shy movements when you told him that, beyond seeing himself as he used to before: spending the night at a woman's home since he wanted to fuck her all night but you… with your cheeks still hot, Chan knew perfectly well that your intentions were pure and out of kindness, and that drove him even crazier, out of tenderness.
He insisted on sleeping on the couch to not make you uncomfortable since you had an extra room but there was no other bed and you… swallowing all your pride persuading him that it was more than okay for him to sleep with you since you suddenly needed his body close to yours, you didn't tell him any of that, you just argued that he must be tired and that your bed was even more comfortable. He agreed, wearing your most oversized sweatpants you had, still fitting his muscular body, and you slept comfortably in his arms, after giving you a very pleasant experience.
He never acted weird afterward for any second, beyond simple giggles every time he saw you as he had in his mind the image of you so surrendered to him letting yourself be touched. However, other than that, Chan still behaved as normal, the small details for you were the hickeys you suddenly had to cover up, but he even became more attached to you, confusing you so much as you were starting to see a side of him that you had never felt or shown interest in knowing about anyone else. The project was a stressful success, Chan had it all, he was smart and attentive so for once in your life you didn't carry absolutely all the weight of academic work. After that day he sat near you every day, just talked and talked, went to lunch with you, and was so cute being genuinely interested in you in general.
Unlike him you had no other activity outside of college, he kept busy during the day, but being with a little more confidence towards you since that night, Chan was really managing to be able to make time off and see you off campus without it being too late, he would endeavor to sit and eat with you, ask you where you were and if he could take you to your apartment, where you invited him in and stayed for a while exclusively talking, in a slightly so tense atmosphere as the tension of both of you was so tangible; and so it went for the rest of the week. His closeness was so evident as he was not someone who went unnoticed around the university and you knew that there were already countless rumors that for Chan to be around you, so strangely behind you was because somehow you had already had sex or Chan was waiting to have it with you soon. Chan knew it too, the silly and immature rumors he didn't care unless he saw that they were bothering you, that's when he would act and stop everything… until then, the rumors weren't that bad, at least he thought so, he thought they were ridiculous and didn't care about them since at the end of the day he was with you.
On the other hand, your small circle of friends was severely puzzled as to what was going on between you and Chan, although not even you knew it clearly because you were really starting to like him, he was so cute and showed a genuine interest in you that it suddenly drove you crazy. You couldn't confess to them that you were considering him seriously, in such a short time.
It didn't bother you, your dirty little secret was that you enjoyed a wonderful night with Chan, so the little rumors made you a little proud as you had never experienced such a thing.
But you seriously liked Chan, he was so cute with you and a part of you didn't want him to only want you for sex, as you recognized he had a reputation, but you wanted to ignore it at all costs, you didn't want to be able to believe that all his kindness and attention was only focused on having sex afterwards, as all the rumors claimed, you had no idea how crazy you had Chan at your disposal and power.
And once again, Chan walked out of class with you, on a Friday, he looked so cute following you with a smile, just showing that he was so happy and comfortable to be with you. You both walked around the campus comfortably until he suddenly blurts out:
“Mmm what are you doing today?”
He was so busy, but he would always make sure to make room for you, he really wanted to ask you out, he wanted you to hang out with him seriously, but he was suddenly so shy at the also new sensations for him, he had never liked someone of that magnitude, so purely that sometimes it came to scare him.
You looked into his eyes, his slitted, shining dark eyes, waiting for an answer. You were so confused, you wanted him all of a sudden, just for you, but you were so afraid of interpreting things and that at the end of the day… he only wanted you for pleasure. Sadly, just today you were going to see some friends, but you had already spent the rest of the week together, Chan seemed to just want to be with you.
“Mmm, I'll see some friends.”
You saw his excited expression soften a little, somewhat disappointed.
“Oh, I see. Can we meet tomorrow?”
You smiled at him, analyzing every detail of his face, suddenly questioning all the typical questions a delusional woman at that precise moment could ask herself, wondering if all the little moments you saw each other and spent together he counted as a date or if he ever really asked you out more formally, you honestly had no idea how that dating system worked, so you needed a little help from your friends as soon as possible, you were losing your breath just at the sight of him...
You were about to happily answer him a yes, glad to hear what his proposal would be to spend time together, but a boy interrupted you, walked around to meet Chan and squeezed him amicably by the shoulder.
“Hey, dude, see you tomorrow, don't skip, okay?” the boy said to Chan with a smile, pointing at him amicably and just walking away.
The both of you were surprised by his sudden action and appearance and watched the muscular boy walk away. You decided to play a little.
“I guess you already had plans tomorrow.”
“They don't matter. I can cancel anything to see you” he quickly replied, making it look slightly intense, causing you to get a heat in your cheeks, quickly understanding what he meant.
Since when had you become so important to him?
You both paused for a few moments to get a better look at each other. His answer was so obvious but you still had your doubts.
You blinked in puzzlement, still with your cheeks red, which Chan found adorable and realized the tone his earlier comment may have sounded in, embarrassing him and turning his ears red, he was crazy about you, he needed you, he wanted to be with you and do all the sweet cheesy things, at the same time he wanted to balance it with the most amazing sex.
“What were your plans?” you asked again, still embarrassed and without thinking, averting the subject and your eyes from his gaze.
“Ah it's nothing, a party at a club for one of the frat boys' birthday.”
You nodded, listening to him intently, as he mentioned it with such disinterest. Chan knew that a party was not your ideal environment and place, so he simply deflected that kind of event from you and wanted to do more kinds of things that would come in your mood.
You again appreciated the details of his face and suddenly thought of all the things you did that were related to you… but you didn't do things that were more like him, so without thinking once more you said, looking him in the eye:
“You should go.”
Once again Chan's face showed disappointment, but that wasn't where you wanted to go.
“You want me to go…?”
“We can go together” you added suddenly, wanting to wipe the disappointment off his pretty face.
He was shocked by your decision, it wasn't that he didn't want to invite you, he just never considered that it would be something you wanted to do. Chan wasn't a party guy either, but he had to do it for the sake of the fraternity and for hanging out with his friends, giving him the reputation of a famous guy who liked to party.
“Ah, sure, I'd love to” he smiled at you, “I didn't suggest it because I didn't think you'd want to go…”
You smiled back, feeling proud to turn the tables a little. It was a party, nothing out of this world, you didn't attend many regularly but you were slightly familiar, at least with the context and image of what it could be like, since honestly, you hadn't attended one ever and you felt a bit pathetic and nerdy every time you were with Chan, someone so knowledgeable and wonderful in all areas, you wanted to try new things, him and his little world.
“I want to go” you replied confidently and suddenly fell into embarrassment, “Oh I'm sorry, can I go?”
Chan licked his lips happily, somewhat strangely at your sudden enthusiasm for attending a college party, but genuinely happy. He didn't want to stay with the image of a partying college boy and part of a fraternity all his life, he wanted to be someone serious, he wanted you to take him seriously and see him with eyes that he was just a guy studying physics who liked a girl in his class and both of them could come up with a lot of things.
“Sure you can” he looked at you tenderly ”Well, then how about if I pick you up tomorrow at 9?”
You nodded, your heart racing, not knowing where your boldness and bravery had come from so suddenly. Chan was impressed too but he liked you and just hoped you wouldn't be so disappointed, he recognized that college parties you could take as unusual, weird and boring. And it was true, they had never caught your attention, until Chan lightly involved you in them.
You didn't know what to expect, but you were slightly excited. And once again, Chan made sure to walk you to the place where you would meet your friend, raising glances from her and when you told her that you would go out with him for a party tomorrow she called you crazy, in a good way, and convinced you to buy a nice dress.
[…]
You were nervous, as much as Chan was about taking you to his side, not as something official, but certainly taking such a big step, making everyone assume that you are that plus one to take everywhere, he wanted you like that, always close, his little crush was bearing more and more fruit and was even developing so many true and genuine feelings for you, he felt ridiculous, falling in love at his age… he was not a faithful believer of love until he met you, he wanted to be with you, to take care of you and dedicate his days to you.
All day long you were texting until the real moment came when he knocked on your door.
Your best friend gave you instructions and advice on what to drink, what to wear and what was the right makeup for such a night. Then you opened the door, leaving Chris engrossed, caught up in your perfume and as if he was in a movie, all in slow motion, in the typical scene where the guy recognizes that she's the girl and suddenly sees her ten times more attractive, that was partly the case, he always found you so attractive, both inside and out, but today, you looked in a way that even in his deepest fantasy he couldn't have imagined, in a tight black dress, without your glasses, your pretty eyes highlighted in shimmering makeup eyeshadow, your eyelashes long and curly, a blush that looked perfect on you and glossy lipstick on your lips that Chan suddenly wanted to kiss so badly.
Needless to say, you stole his breath away.
“You look beautiful” he mentioned.
Your cheeks naturally started to turn red. He wasn't far behind, he was so handsome, with his outfit, black shirt and pants with a cool design, his short brushed hair and a long chain decorating his neck and falling down his chest.
“You look good too” you could say.
Chan chuckled. And proposed walking out to his car where he opened the door for you. He had his own car, but that first time the two of you met, he was so nervous that he walked to the coffee shop to see you. But now he controlled his nerves, but he didn't know exactly how to react or what to do to have you in intimacy again, not that he always idealized that, but it was a recurring thought in his head every time he thought of you, he thought of you and everything he loved about you, but also of that wonderful night when he made you see stars, in your bodies needing each other, he wanted so badly to repeat it, but he didn't want to pressure you as he didn't want you to see him as someone just looking for sex, when he really desired a connection with you.
Chan licked his lips, watching you out of the corner of his eye, he couldn't help it, he wanted you in so many ways, first it was the sweet moment when he cherished every inch of you innocently, now he wanted to worship every inch of you so dirty, he wanted to possess you right there now, suddenly his clothes were so tight, just like your dress, he was lost and he would give it all just to touch you again, caress your thigh on the way, kiss you, but he had decided to be so cute with you and set all those limits until you spoke up, confirming to him what you wanted, if you wanted a relationship where you were just friends for pleasure, it would be painful for him, he would involve feelings, but he would be fine with that, but you were so shy and just pretended nothing had happened that night.
Chan cleared his throat, at the same time he had so many questions for you.
“Mmm, you brought your ID, didn't you?” he spoke to break the silence.
You nodded. You were ready but as you got closer to your destination you regretted it more and more, but it was worth it to be close to Chan.
“Are you sure you want to go? Any time you want to leave we can do it” he spoke again, slightly concerned.
You looked at him. Chan stopped the car at a red light. You recognized once again how handsome he looked, his strong arms on the steering wheel, all of him, you wanted to feel his lips again.
“I'll be fine. You think I'm a spoilsport?”
Chan laughed, looking you straight in the eye.
“It's not that… it's just that,” he decided to be honest, “I never thought a club would be your kind of fun.”
You examined his face, flooding you with the ideas that he had you in a concept of an innocent studious girl, it was true, you didn't go to parties much and stayed in your apartment studying or just locked up watching some movie, but that Chan had you in that concept somehow caused you insecurity, you wanted to be for him everything he was looking for and you were so inexperienced with men that you didn't know clearly what it was he wanted. Whether the boring little version of you, or someone more outgoing that he might consider taking with his friends.
“It's not,” you confessed, “But a little party never hurt someone.”
Chan smiled and the green light illuminated his face. It wasn't a small party, it was a crowded club and his friend would be celebrating his birthday in a small VIP area. He just hoped you were ready.
And when you arrived everything was fine. Chan grabbed you by the waist, going straight to the security guy and showing some kind of card and let him in without waiting in line. You blinked in bewilderment, as the man didn't question anything at all and without realizing it, you were slowly making your way into the place. It was dark, smelled of air freshener and cigarettes and as you entered the music got louder, like Chan's grip on you.
You were inside, the lights illuminated both of you. For a second you forgot to recharge your social battery, but you would be fine, you convinced yourself, you would drink and at the end of the night you hoped to at least return to kiss Chan and you would have the silly excuse that the situation warranted it.
“Let's go to the VIP” Chan shouted in your ear, which didn't sound like a shout, it sounded normal because of the volume of the music.
You tried to look at him, he looked so relaxed, like it was something he did often. You didn't know what he was talking about but you held your bag tighter and he kept holding you tightly by the waist and walking along with you, passing between groups of people, Chan was making sure you didn't bump into anyone, that no one touched or brushed against you, his face was so focused, almost as if it was his job, like a bodyguard, putting you more in a strange mood, liking him even more.
You noticed Chan stopped and changed the direction of his steps when he saw someone, you both walked up a few stairs and met a group of people away from the main dance floor.
Chan approached to a slim blond guy, with a drink in his hand and enjoying the loud music, Chan questioned him something inaudible to you, to which he responded with an exaggerated gesture with his arms, as if indicating that everyone was there. Chan looked around, while you felt lost, almost like a fish out of water, so exposed on a surface that wasn't yours, you didn't want to go home, but you just wanted to relax, stop tensing up and enjoy the moment.
“Well, everyone's here” Chan spoke loudly in your ear again. You nodded, “It's Minho's party, another frat boy, Changbin dragged him here, but he's fun. I live with three other guys, I never told you before? Don't think it's twenty guys locked up in a house.”
You laughed, you were so focused on listening to him and he would suddenly come out with his comments.
“I'll introduce you to them” he said again.
Moments later Chan introduced you to each of his friends, seven in total, the others just made comments on the air with their names. Chan was a gentleman but he never introduced a girl to his friends, not in such a formal way and between giggles showing his nervousness.
You tried to adjust and before you knew it you were comfortably engaged in a conversation with Hyunjin, Chan's friend and roommate. Then he showed up, somewhat jealous that you wouldn't stop talking to Hyunjin, but happy that you were getting along so well with someone close to him and adjusting to what can be an overwhelming environment, Chan asked you if you wanted something to drink to which you nodded saying whatever was fine, then you remembered about not trusting drinks to men, but it was Chan, you trusted him blindly. Chan wanted to spare you the fatigue of going through people to get a drink so he offered to bring it to you, plus you were comfortably seated, away from Hyunjin, but talking to him.
Within minutes of Chan leaving as he was confident you were fine with his close friend, Hyunjin left with regret as a girl called him on the phone and he claimed she had just arrived and he would go get her, he apologized and left, leaving you sitting and feeling strange. Half of Chan's friends were lost on the dance floor, you suddenly felt stranded, you were about to stand up, but you felt someone sit near you which you thought for a microsecond it would be Chan but your expression and excitement changed as you realized it was a stranger, boldly looking at your cleavage.
“College girl, right? A lot of college students tend to come here often, but someone like you I've never seen before…. I'm Changwook, by the way.”
You sketched an awkward smile, you felt him unnecessarily close to you. You saw him, he looked older, he wasn't ugly, but his strange behavior completely displeased you. You didn't know what to say, you had nothing else to say but to get out of the situation.
“Are you here by yourself? Or are any of your friends around? And you're not drinking, honey, I'll buy you drinks, it would be a pl--”
“Excuse me.”
It was what you both could hear over the loud music, the voice was so familiar to you, it came out in such a loud and demanding tone, feeling so suddenly the presence of someone right in front of you. You felt so relieved to see Chan, just when you needed him. He was carrying a drink for the ones he went for but left it on the small table in front of the elongated couch you were sitting on. Chan could see your discomfort and your relief reflected on your face at the sight of him. The unknown boy just smirked at you and ignored you completely, despite noticing the obvious and obvious pout Chan was making at him.
“Well, what drink would you like to try, cutie?” he leaned close to your ear for you to hear, his thigh brushing against yours, you were uncomfortable.
Chan warmed his body furiously.
For some reason you were motionless, not knowing what exactly to do, you didn't want to be a girl in distress and helpless but it was all so new and sudden, the atmosphere of a club, a strange and dischargeable guy approaching you without leaving you space and seeing you dirty….
“Didn't you fucking hear me? Get away from her.”
This time Chan repeated more annoyed seeing his attitude and that he had completely ignored him, plus he couldn't tolerate seeing you like that. The man looked up in annoyance and Chan gently took your arm so you could stand up, you took his hand and approached him almost like a helpless child in fear, relieved to be able to feel the warmth of his body close and him close in general.
The man was puzzled and understood everything, or at least he thought he did with an incredulous smile.
“Ahh, you were coming with your boyfriend?” he commented and stood up, standing dangerously in front of Chan, you stood behind him, still holding on to his arm and hand, “Why would you leave your cute little girlfriend alone, with a dress like that it's so dangerous…”
Chan wanted them to call you his girlfriend but not coming from some weird guy, he was furious, he clenched his free fist but you noticed the muscles in the left arm you were holding, tense up, his nostrils flared angrily, the man looked so defiant and Chan was already glaring at him, clenching his jaw, unable to believe he was making comments about you and what you were wearing which you are free to do, he was disgusted to even have him around, he wanted to beat him to a pulp. But he decided to calm down, a fight would get him nowhere, but he would really break everything for you.
“Just get lost, man. Leave her alone, she's with me” he mumbled, annoyed and choosing to calm down.
You watched the scene with some uncertainty, you didn't know the guy and you didn't know what he was capable of, and suddenly you didn't know about Chan either as he really looked annoyed and so domineering. It was a bad tension, you'd hate it if they started fighting.
The man saw Chan more defiant, clenching his fist, you saw it and you were scared that at any moment he might hit Chan.
“Alright alright I get it, fine.”
The guy left, annoyed and glaring at both of you, you could breathe easy, Chan fixedly watched him walk away until he was lost in the crowd, waiting for small seconds when something unexpected will happen again, when he lost sight of him and he felt inside that the area was clear and free of him, he abruptly turned to you, taking you by the face and seeing you so concerned, softening his eyebrows and looking at you as if you were the most fragile creature in the world and spoke to you softly in contrast to his annoyed tone and tense body just seconds ago.
“Are you all right? What did he do to you? Why were you alone? Hyunjin left you? That damn motherf…"
You saw him slightly upset as he filled you with comments and by his heavy but tender gaze on you, he looked so worried about you.
“I'm fine, really, he didn't do anything to me-”
“But he was a mother fucking creep. Where's Hyunjin? Sorry sorry for leaving you, I should never have done that, do you want to go home now? Do you want me to take you?”
He was still talking so worried that now you felt tender. His face was close to yours and you stared into his bright eyes amidst the darkness of the place.
“I'm fine, it wasn't Hyunjin's responsibility to take care of me anyway-”
“You're right” he interrupted you again, ”I should have been there, I never meant to leave you. Shall we go home?”
You smiled softly at him, enjoying his hand on your face and how serious he sounded about it.
“Mmm, we just got here, don't let this bad timing ruin everything, yeah?”
Chan smiled at your response. He couldn't let something happen to you because of something he felt was dragging you down. He nodded, beginning to believe you were liking being there at least a little.
“What drink did you bring?” you deflected the subject.
Chan slowly let go of you making you blush since you were so close immersed in your bubble.
“Mmm want to taste it?” he commented, picking up the drink again to hand it to you.
“Just one?” you said amused.
“You can only have one today” he replied playing along.
“What about yours?”
“I won't drink, doll, I'm driving and I have to get you home safely.”
You nodded once again blushing at his comment as you took a sip of the drink, it was sweet, but you couldn't deny that the bitter taste of alcohol was there. There were so many things about Chan that could surprise you, like the fact that he hardly ever drank, that he hardly ever attended parties but maintained a complete opposite image somehow.
After the bad moment, once again Chan approached his friends who were in an area of the dance floor on the borders, Felix and Hyunjin were having fun while the rest were there and others were lost somewhere else. It was a public space evidently and the stares were so common, but for some reason you felt them ten times heavier than in other places and it was inevitable, you were glowing and Chan could also tell how many eyes were focused on you.
But 5 drinks later you were starting to see the fun and join the dance along with Felix, you had such a short tolerance for alcohol, you didn't try it regularly, you were losing control and getting drunk. Chan assigned Han to bring you drinks in order not to leave you alone even for a second, Chan authorized your second drink but discreetly after the second one you kept telling him if he could bring you another one, and another and another one. You tried different drinks which was not the best idea, in combination with the strong lights on your face, making you even more dizzy.
Chan was looking at you funny from afar, watching you having a good time with Felix and Han as he was a bit shy to join the dance floor, but suddenly, his tender look changed completely when he saw a complete stranger approaching you again, slyly wanting to dance with you, sticking to your body, you were already slightly confused enough that you thought the guy was just another friend of Chan, but Chan acted fast and didn't let him get close to you at all, or rather, touch you.
Chan wasn't the kind of guy who blamed the way you dressed… but it was inevitable to deny that your short and tight dress with that cleavage could arouse something in more people and he hated it, he was jealous that more people were seeing you, that some are doing it with such a dirty look, lusting after you.
“Chaaan” you said animatedly, obviously a little drunk, with the alcohol having more and more effect on you.
Seeing Chan under the dizziness brought on by the alcohol was like a dream, as if he only existed, you were liking it strangely.
He noticed your condition, he thought for a second that you looked so cute, so free and loose, with an expression of happiness on your face that he hadn't seen before… but he knew exactly that it was because you were under the effects of alcohol.
You stood in front of him, trying to dance, not reasoning exactly what you were doing, just standing there, feeling somehow pleasantly light-headed, something you had never felt before.
“I think someone's had too much to drink already. How much have you had to drink? We should go home” he mentioned seriously.
One of the reasons he was serious was that he found no amusement when you were being devoured by the gaze of more men.
“What, you're not going to dance? Why don't you teach me how to do it?”
You pouted, Chan was just standing somewhat stiffly in the middle of the dance floor. He shook his head softly.
“You still don't want to go home?” he said.
You had no notion of time. You didn't answer, when another guy didn't respect that you were together, heading towards you.
“Hey, cutie, can I get your insta?”
Chan opened his wide, confused by the situation. You looked at the guy without knowing who he was or understanding what he said, but Chan stepped forward to say.
“No, she can't, she's with me, go away.”
Chan didn't know what to say, he was so upset for the moment with his heart racing from so many emotions in a short time because of you.
The guy left and you smiled at Chan, laughing softly as if you had been told a joke, this time hugging him and raising your eyes to see him, in such a perfect position to kiss him, the reality was you were losing your balance and wanted to hold on to something, but somehow he was surprised by your act and swallowed nervously, acting as shy as if you had never touched each other before, however, he wrapped his arms around your waist and let them rest on your lower back, pulling you closer to him.
“You keep saying that…” you began to slur your words.
“What?” he said softly, lost in you, aware that you might not have heard him.
“She's with me” you mimicked his serious tone, in a playful way, ”Am I with you, Chan…? Why haven't you made it clear to me all week? You haven't kissed me again, don't you want to?”
He looked at you puzzled, thinking that just now you must be too drunk to start saying such things, but at the same time, he was aware of your honesty. Chan questioned feeling pathetic if you waited all those days for him to make the first move.
“Y/n…�� he was about to come clean with you, even though you were drunk, but you interrupted him.
The magical moment existed only for him.
“Aren't you going to dance? Dance with me or I'll dance with Felix.”
Chan felt stupidly in love and took care of you, you started to dance tenderly and he let himself go.
After minutes, an amused Felix approached his friend to say:
“She asked me how to make a boy jealous.”
You heard him and blushed, remembering that you had told him that when you were still sober and wanted to make Chan jealous so he would approach you on the dance floor and not leave you alone. Besides you wanted to see him upset again, since you thought his expression was so fucking hot a few moments ago, you had to admit it.
“Felix” you reproached him.
The blond walked away laughing, only provoking you both.
“So you want to make someone jealous, huh?” Chan said in a harsh voice close to your ear as he held you by the waist.
Your little moment of alcohol fun was gone, now it was a different kind of fun as you were sobering up, the memory of you dancing so Chan could approach you was humiliating that lowered your drunkenness, but somehow the plan worked as a guy approached you and he came to you almost running.
“Who did you want to make jealous, huh babygirl?”
You didn't respond, you were paralyzed at his touch, shyness taking over you again. Chan's ego grew knowing you wanted to come up with something to make him jealous.
“I'll show you” he said speaking seductively, “You have to show the other guy that he must come to claim what is his, so you will provoke him, being so loose and feeling yourself, like you don't care about anything else and letting yourself go” Chan turned your body with ease, “And dance like the other person doesn't exist, do it, tease them both and win.”
Now you couldn't move, you were processing the alcohol leaving your system and having Chan in such a sexy way.
“Dance” he ordered softly.
You tried to move, he grabbed your waist again and pressed you to your body, you could feel the rubbing of both bodies, little by little you let yourself go until you ground such a strategic area on him and making him aroused.
Chan couldn't take it anymore, your adjusted ass in that dress, rubbing on his cock… he didn't know at what point he achieved that, but he just knew he was fucking turned on right now. You noticed his bulge, bit your lip and turned abruptly to see him with a twinge of arousal in your pussy, you both had enough of the party now, it was time to take the fun somewhere else more private.
“Chan. Can we. Leave?” you spoke, shyly watching him with wide eyes.
He nodded in relief as his erection was only growing.
Chan awkwardly said goodbye to his friends, trying to hide his erection and finally you both walked to his car, which you got into and Chan started off not knowing exactly where to go, but he did know he needed you just now, taking care of him because his cock was hurting more and more and your apartment was farther away than his home…
You too were with an excitement growing in your body, but you didn't know how to communicate it.
Chan didn't resist and acted:
“Mmm well, there's no one at my place, all the guys are still at the club, do you want to go?”
He was desperate and his house was only 8 minutes away from the club. And he could also easily tell how much you wanted him too.
You nodded nervously, waiting for him to touch you again and slyly saw his big bulge. You almost sighed, thinking how much you wanted to sit on him again and move on it.
You tried to bring up a gentle topic of conversation, making both of you hold out all the way to his house and not let him touch you right there in the car. You asked little questions about which of his friends was the most likely to leave the club early but your voice only made Chan's poor swollen cock twitch and cry, his poor tip weeping drops of precum living off the fantasy of being able to have you again.
You were wet, it was enough for you to watch his handsome figure drive, his big hands squeeze the steering wheel, you were both to some extent comically aroused, filling the car with sighs and frustration until you finally reached your destination.
You knew Chan was excited, but you found it so hard to make the first bold and daring move that you only limited yourself to saying once you were inside and surveyed the place:
“Wow, it looks pretty neat for a boys-only house.”
Chan laughed. With his cock hard, amazed that you were back to being the same tender, shy girl, pretending he didn't have a big bulge between his pants that only indicated one thing.
“Mmm, and my room is even tidier, let's go see it.”
He unexpectedly took you by the hand, leading you up the stairs and into his room. You were stunned and excited, you knew exactly what was in store for you.
His whole room was in perfect order, it smelled nice and you suddenly felt your body warm knowing you were now in his space.
“Nice” you said.
Chan looked at you for a few seconds, an incredulous smile on his face. You were still there, excited but not coming any closer.
“You need to stop being so shy” he confessed, stepping in front of you, finally taking the initiative, “And start telling me exactly what you're thinking about. Do you want this?”
He grabbed your waist, pulling your body closer to his, feeling his erection against you. You nodded and your innocence only succeeded in making him harder. He began to caress your ass and your whole body sensually.
“And why don't you say it?” he spoke again.
You bit your lip, thinking about the right words, you were only thinking about how much you would want him to fuck you, but saying it so explicitly wasn't your thing, not even telling someone you want them to fuck you.
“Chan… you can, you know…”
He laughed softly, leaning down to take your lips sweetly, enjoying and savoring since he hadn't kissed you in long days, because he'd wanted to for a long time in every way possible. You closed your eyes, pleasantly surprised and lost in him.
“You know…” he spoke close to your lips, his nose brushing against yours, “It's not just about sex, I really want to take you on dates and get to know you if you'll let me.”
You were entranced in him. Unable to process any information very well, other than his name in your head over and over again.
“Okay” you whispered and he caught your lips again, “Let's go out…” you whispered.
The truth was you couldn't have been more excited by his comment. It was everything you wanted to hear and everything you wanted to do about to happen, he had it all.
Chan grabbed your face, glad to be on the same page and this time the kiss was getting more passionate and desperate, suddenly he had left maturity behind and being a young and horny mess, thinking about how much he wanted to satisfy his cock already. He began to touch you, thrusting his tongue into your mouth, teasing you slightly hard against your lips. His naughty fingers went all the way to your center, eager to feel you, to know you were feeling what he was feeling.
It was more than obvious, your little panties were wet with just the manly presence of Bang Chan, to know what he was capable of and how he could treat you, you were with your heart racing and your mind working quickly in all the dirty and delicious scenarios, both of you needed each other already in desperation.
Chan almost moaned between kisses as he slipped his hand under your dress and pulled the fabric of your pussy aside and felt the softness of your womanhood, so docile and manipulable in his fingers, your sensitive, throbbing clit ready for his touch, your snug labia in your folds, Chan fantasized so much about you, about the feel of his cock buried in your core, of your mouth on his shaft, of the ways he wanted to settle your body into sex, everything, but right now he was so needy that he even wanted to act like a hormonal college boy who would only seek his own pleasure by sticking his cock in you, but no, he wasn't like that.
His long finger found the perfect way to stimulate your clit by pressing it and gently circling it while the rest of his fingers slowly lost themselves in your folds. You were about to lose your balance as you were extremely sensitive down there, eager for attention. Chan lowered his kisses to your neck inhaling your scent, hypnotized on your skin, he couldn't take any more, he was so stimulated with his cock throbbing in desperation.
“Fuck, baby, are you ready now? I need to fuck you now” he whispered almost babbling into your neck in an indescribable tone of voice, he was so excited that his deep voice made you shudder.
Chan sought your entrance, gently inserting his finger to check exactly what he needed, that you were wet, ready to take his cock at last. You moaned, his finger was teasing shallowly inside you, spreading your fluid, you got nervous again, you wanted to enjoy it and do it right for Chan, there were so many things you had to be the best at without having any experience, you hated not being the best at everything.
He noticed your tense body and worried expression.
“It's okay baby, relax, I'll make you feel good.”
You looked into his eyes, this time with two fingers inside you, deep and exploring your insides, you moaned in pleasure and pain, it was such a new and delightful surprise, and you wanted to let go of the fact that you were obviously so inexperienced. Chan felt his fingers being squeezed inside you, driving him crazy with the idea of how his hard cock was going to feel in you.
“Oh fuck, do you want me to do it now or do you want me to eat you again, baby girl?”
His indirectly direct questions shocked your excited, needy, inexperienced body as if he wasn't fucking you with his fingers just now. You lowered your gaze to his pants, thinking of all the time he may have had to hold back, thinking of how intimidatingly big and appetizing he looked, thinking of the sensation of feeling full.
“Do it, Chan, please, I need it.”
His fingers worked magically on you, but fantasizing about the idea of feeling even fuller wouldn't leave your head.
Chan smiled haughtily and began unbuttoning his pants desperately with his free hand.
“Pull them down, princess” he ordered you, pointing his head down.
You saw him and then at his open pants, your pussy throbbed again and you quickly obeyed him, exposing his vulnerable hard cock.
“Mm baby, touch it, feel how hard I am for you” Chan teased you.
He saw your slightly shocked expression at the sight of his erect member and you tentatively took his cock in your hands, not sure what to do but out of curiosity and desire you felt every inch of him, confirming his stiffness, feeling a boy's cock for the first time.
You began to masturbate him, running your hands over the thin, rigid skin of his penis, pushing Chan to the limit. He couldn't take it anymore, he would either fuck you or cum in your hand, it was time to act.
Chan removed his fingers from you, he deftly and easily turned you around, slowly pulling your panties down, he was so eager and ready to do it, to fuck you and have you all to himself.
You trembled softly in nervousness sure of what awaited you, not sure of the new sensation, but you were desperate in pleasure, you needed him, filling you, you wanted him for completeness in you. Chan hurried, quickly taking a condom from his nightstand right off his bed, putting it on with agility, as you witnessed the latex slipping down his length, awakening in you more impatience and a great sexual desire, finally he returned to you.
You looked at yourself in the full length mirror in front of, your panties down, your expression with ruddy cheeks, waiting for him to approach.
“Are you okay here, baby? Or do you want to do it on the bed… because honestly I want to fuck you while I see your pretty face in the mirror, huh” Chan said in a deep voice, standing behind you and holding your cheeks tightly with his hand.
You watched him from the mirror, his position behind you… he looked so fucking good, thinking you wanted to witness him too.
“It's okay like that, Ch-chan.”
“Good girl” he gasped, unable to resist any longer.
Chan lifted your dress, exposing your ass, massaged it, admiring it for a moment and then placed his hand on your lower back gently pushing you, indicating you to bend over a little, Chan held you by your belly with his left hand while with his right he took his cock, lining it up with your entrance and slowly inserting it, making him suck air between his teeth and moan audibly in relief, you squealed, resenting the incredible and timely change in your anatomy, of his cock sliding inside you and settling into your walls, you were going crazy with every inch he entered at the same time Chan was losing his mind at the sensation of your tightness.
Chan watched the erotic act of your entrance open up for his cock, then saw your sweet expression in his mirror as he babbled softly, “There you go, there you go, baby girl, gooood girl, it's almost all in, god you're taking it so well, you feel so good, fuck, please.”
You both whimpered as he was already deep in you, filling you up, pounding your cervix, but the fun was just beginning, Chan took you by the hips and started to penetrate you slowly and deeply to get you used to his size, then he stretched your body, to stick your back to his chest and started to ram you quickly, crashing against your skin, lost with the feeling of his cock in your walls, your moans and the expression of disaster on your face, so flustered.
Chan continued to pound your pussy until he was breathless, the sensation for both of you was magical, both of you suddenly seeing stars as he kept babbling things in your ear. He loved every second of your face being fucked hard, Chan wanted to have the image of you etched in his mind forever. And your dress suddenly became tighter, you were exasperated by the moment, looking for a release, looking for that culmination of your pleasure that was taking over every inch of you.
You dared to look at yourself in his mirror, Chan was so focused on making you feel good, collapsing his skin with yours, filling every corner of you until you were delightfully sore. He looked so good in that position, you thought, taking you and fucking you hard, both bodies struggling between moans and gasps, culminating in orgasm. You felt a huge knot in your stomach and an uncontrollable tide of emotions at the same time.
You were deliciously wrecked, tired and Chan sweetly offered to let you sleep right after the act. He was happy to finally make the move.
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#bang chan#bangchan#bang chan smut#chan smut#stray kids#skz#stray kids smut#skz smut#bang chan x reader#bangchan smut#bang chan x you#chan x reader#chan x you#stray kids x reader#stray kids x you#skz scenarios#skz x reader#skz x you#skz fic#𐙚wen writes♡₊˚⊹
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HEAR ME OUT. TELL ME Y'ALL SEE THE VISION AND I WILL COOK SMTH IMMEDIATELY.
i heard y'all loud and clear now, now i need y'all's help in deciding what type of satoru will be in the fic, help me here! <3
POSTED!
satoru gojo is the guy everyone in your major knows—ridiculously smart, annoyingly hot, borderline unapproachable unless you’re part of his stupid little circle. he’s got freelance gigs pouring in, edits promo reels for actual brands, and once got a professor to extend a deadline just by smiling.
you worked together once—on a boring group project no one else cared about. but he edited your presentation slides into a cinematic masterpiece and you’ve never forgotten it.
so months later, when your fashion content finally starts gaining traction, and you’re drowning in vlog footage with no time to cut it down—you text him.
hey. remember when u edited our project? can u help me trim some vids pls… i suck at this lol”
you say it’s just a favor. just cutting out the boring parts.
but the videos you send him? yeah, they’re anything but boring.
you talk to the camera like it’s a boyfriend.
you laugh too loud.
you try on heels in front of full-body mirrors.
and every time you drop a necklace or lean over to pick up a perfume bottle? you look straight into the lens.
no jump cuts. no edits. just intent.
and fine, maybe he spends way too long on the lingerie try-on segment. maybe he pauses every time you bend over, frame-by-frame, like he’s adjusting color grading—but really he’s just watching the way your thighs press together. maybe he syncs your audio and loops your giggle four, five, six times, rewinding the way you say “oops” like it’s a fucking song.
maybe he exports that three-second timestamp—just the part where your fingers hook into the band of your panties and you whisper “should i keep this one?”—into a separate folder buried deep in his hard drive.
it’s not even named professionally. not “asset_ref3” or “raw_pull_b.”
nah.
it’s named "fuckmepls.mp4"
and it lives in a folder called "NOT work (unless)"
he tells himself it’s research. he tells himself every editor does this. but his dick’s in his hand more than it’s on his mouse these days, and you’re to blame. you with your lazy drawl and shiny lip gloss and the way you talk to the camera like it’s his mouth you’re feeding lines to.
but then, one day, a file comes in titled:
"march haul (raw).mp4"
he clicks play.
it’s you. in your bedroom. in new lingerie. in front of the mirror. saying things like—
“god, i hope this one fits…”
“oops, sorry—too much cleavage?”
"i bet you’d pause right here, wouldn’t you?"
it ends mid-sentence.
five minutes later, another file drops into the folder:
"march haul (real).mp4"
you text:
oops. wrong send lol. this is the real one!
you don’t even delete nor unsent the wrongfully sent file.
he doesn’t ask you to.
that night, he doesn’t even pretend. he edits the video with his cock in hand, moaning your name while you test lip colors like you’re daring him to fuck up a timestamp.
now every time you ask for “another quick edit,” he’s sweating. because you’ll drop something again. you'll bite your lip again. you’ll look into the camera like you know exactly what he’s doing with that footage.
and you’re still calling it a favor.
#editor's notes#gojo satoru#gojo x female reader#gojo x reader#satoru gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojo smut#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#gojo x reader smut#jjk x reader
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i don't wanna look at anything else (now that i saw you) PART 1/3
where you’re just trying to make it through the day, and jamie thinks you’re his girlfriend (jamie tartt x fem!reader)
AN: hello i started this blog to post all of my writings that have been piling up! this has been sitting on my laptop for awhile, and i decided to post the first part to see how things go! lmk ur thoughts! btw this is not proofread oops
word count: 6k+
You think that the highlight of your day might be tending to your garden.
It started as a bit of a de-stressing-after-your-job hobby. At first, you found joy in coming home and taking time to water the flower beds at the front of your home, faithfully tending to them with the sole purpose of making the exterior of the house pretty for passerbyers. That soon turned into your father helping you install a window box at your bedroom window, so you can wake up to the site of blooming Zinnias. You meticulously started planting more flowers in your yard, and soon the vegetable garden (a neighborhood favorite).
Mrs. Dunphy from two houses down was the first person who inquired on the abundance of your radishes and carrots. Never one to turn down a request, you began to give her a generous amount of the vegetables you’ve grown. And she’s just too sweet of a woman, sometimes you will pick the best of your abundance to give.
And once word got around the street that you were giving away free, fresh vegetables, more people came running. Mr. Taylor suddenly was wondering about any spare tomatoes for the sandwiches and salads he makes when his grandkids visit. Stevie likes to snack on cucumbers, and she’s one of the very few people you know around the block your age, so of course you’re gonna chop a few when she comes over to watch shitty reality TV with you (and pack a few for her to take home, of course).
Your garden has become something to connect you with other members of your neighborhood in Richmond, thus making it a passion project of sorts. As well as a productive pastime—that might as well be a second job. You try to keep it a secret, but you’ve begun to talk to your plants. That one tip about how talking to plants is good for their health is pretty famous, right?
You’re quietly humming to the acoustic radio station you have playing on your speaker, meticulously chopping up onions for your soup. You like the recipe you're doing—it’s creamy and rich and you have most of the ingredients in either your cupboards, or your garden.
It’s one of those days where you’re off work early, and just looking forward to a day to yourself. It’s not abnormal for Stevie to come ringing the doorbell whenever she sees fit, but it’s a day where you know she’s going to be gone late for work. So unless you decide to call up one of your other friends, or maybe your parents, it’s just you. And you’d like to go that way: you’ve been waiting for a bit of a self-care day. Nothing can cure your stress like warm soup, some music, and the comfort of your home.
You open your fridge, spotting the array of tomatoes before picking one to use. Though, nearly immediately, your mind wanders off to something. Your eyes instinctually glance out your kitchen window at the house next-door, seeing it empty of the typical car.
A new neighbor had moved in recently next-door, and usually he’d be home by now. . . Is it weird that you know that? Maybe it’s a bit creepy. But, if you’re completely honest, you’re a bit hyper-aware of this neighbor. If it isn’t his status in England, it’s his wonderful personality. And if it isn’t his wonderful personality, it is the fact that he might be one of the most beautiful and fit people that you’ve ever laid eyes on.
You remember the first time you met Jamie.
“You need help?”
Your shoulder jolted slightly, and you nearly dropped the soiled crate of peonies from your arms. It’s hard to startle you, mostly because you think you’re pretty hyper aware of your surroundings. You can easily spot the footsteps of Mr. and Mrs. Michelin, as well as their boisterous voices.
The voice that spoke, however, did not sound like a couple in their early-60s. You hadn't even heard the footsteps.
“Fuck, I’m sorry! Didn’t mean to scare you there.”
You angled your hip around, adjusting the crate in your hands in a way that doesn’t hurt your fingers.
Immediately, it was easy to recognize that the man is Jamie Tartt: not only the man who had recently moved in next door, but also the known striker for Richmond’s own Premier League club. It’d be easy to mistake him for a regular guy, though, if his pajama pants and jumper couldn’t make him look any more average. His hair parts evenly down the center with concerned brows raised up to nearly the hairline.
“Are you okay?” Jamie asked, seeming to mistake your quiet observation of him as you still being scared as balls.
You huffed a laugh. “I’m sorry. You just startled me.”
“That’s my fault—no need to apologize.” He waits another beat before adding, “I’m Jamie. I just moved in next door. I kinda… saw you when I just walked out. Thought to introduce myself.”
You grin. “Trying to be on everyone’s good side?”
He returned your grin, looking less tense now that you had reciprocated the conversation. “‘Never had much of a good one to begin with in neighborhoods. I’m trying to change that.”
There was a beat of silence before you said your name, feeling surprisingly awkward in this situation. You’re by no means a social butterfly, but it’s hard to startle you—especially on your own home property. Every conversation approached to you has always been reciprocated evenly by you. If Mrs. Michelin from down the street wanted to tell a story of the old diner she owned, you did your work quietly while listening, chiming in when necessary. If Stephen from down the block wanted to stop by for tea and gossip (which you’ve never been into the gossip part of it), you sip your tea nonchalantly and ask engaging questions that won’t entirely give away your true opinion on the matter: Mr. Barnaby is rude? What makes you think that?
But for some reason, in the presence of your new neighbor, you found yourself quite speechless. Maybe it’s because Jamie is basically a celebrity. You had no doubt that he had millions of followers on every platform he ran—and the paps love him (she sees it on the news and papers).
That’s probably why.
“Well,” you cleared your throat, smiling. “Welcome! Everyone around here is pretty nice, but you can make those conclusions yourself when they inevitably pay you a visit.”
“Is it a tight-knit group around here?” he asked with a smile.
You nodded. “Quite. A lot of them come over sometimes to get veggies, and they seem to know about each other’s lives well.”
His smile turned into a full-grown grin. Immediately, you were desperate to know which words you said elicited that smile, so that you could say the same thing over and over again.
“You sell veggies?”
You shook your head. “I just grow them for everyone!”
In the next few minutes, you’re setting an arrangement to give Jamie a crate of carrots for his morning smoothies. You hide the giddiness you felt from the possibilities of seeing him again.
You’re placing onions into a pot on the stove, mind now away from your neighbor’s whereabouts, when your phone rings. You toss the chopped onions into the sizzling pot before picking up your phone and placing it between your ear and shoulder.
“Hello?” you say cheerily. It’s been a decent day and you’re about to make your favorite dish, so you’re in a good mood. You balance the phone in between your ear and shoulder and you go back to tend to your uncut tomato.
A lady on the other end—in a voice that seems quite familiar, but you’re still unsure of—says your name questioningly, in an almost frantic manner that has you furrowing your brows.
Placing your cutting knife down, you wipe your hand on a rag before holding your phone directly to your ear for more support. “Yes?”
“Um—I’m sorry, I don’t quite know how to deliver this news to you, especially since we’ve never spoken before… which surprises quite a bit…” the woman’s voice on the other line trails off, leaving you more confused. Setting your knife down, you lean a bit closer to the phone. “But, Jamie’s in the hospital. He’s hit his head.”
Jamie? Your next-door neighbor Jamie? Premier League Jamie? The one you were just thinking about? “Tartt?”
“Yes,” the woman replies, “I’m so sorry.”
You don’t know why the woman is apologizing to you. Jamie’s the one who’s hit his head! It’s still confusing as to why you’re the person who received the call, but concern immediately seeps into your bones at the thought of someone so lovely not being alright.
“No, no. I-It’s okay. Is he alright?”
“He’s got a concussion. It’s quite bad, but not horrible. I’m sure the doctor can explain what’s wrong better than I can. Do you think you can come right now? He’s been asking for you nonstop.”
You frown confusingly. “Me? Are you sure?” You and Jamie are far from strangers, and maybe more than just acquaintances. Sometimes you give the man carrots, that’s basically friend status. But you both are definitely not close enough for him to ask for you after being concussed. He should be asking for a parent, or a relative, or just anyone who is much closer than you are to him.
The woman on the other end giggles. “I’m quite sure. He’s been yapping nonstop to see you—gave us your number and everything! I know this isn’t an ideal circumstance for his friends to meet you, but we really are a bit excited and curious to put a face to the name.”
What the hell has Jamie said about you?
“So,” the lady says on the phone, reminding you that she’s there, “are you able to come?”
You stare at the pot boiling on your stove.
“Send me the address.”
—
The second your eyes meet Jamie’s, his eyes soften until a smile goes over his face. “Took you long enough.”
“Sorry…” your voice trails off, unsure of how to go about talking to him. Your body has barely entered the room in full, but the attention goes to you immediately. You feel the need to give a justified response for why your arrival has been so delayed (you didn’t even know this was happening until barely half an hour ago!). “I was cooking when I got the call, it all happened so suddenly. Are you alright?”
The smile remains on his face. “Perfect now that you’re here.”
There’s a pause in the room. All eyes seem to be on you as you stare back in shock at Jamie's words. A quick glance around the room reveals that everyone is awaiting your next response with surprised, curious eyes.
“I’m sorry,” you say with a frown, trying to ignore how your heart lurches at Jamie’s words. A sentence like that seems like something you would conjure up in the back of your mind during times you’d like to fantasize about Jamie. You try to push those thoughts aside, because he’s nothing more than your neighbor—possibly friend. A double meaning has to be coming from the sentence, and all you have to do is act cool so that no one will know how affected you are by this. “Am I supposed to be bringing him back to his home?”
The nurse looks down at his clipboard. “You’re his neighbor, correct? You know his address?”
“Yes, I do.”
“Then you should be fit to bring him home. Unless, you think it’ll be more reliable for someone else to? I know all of this must be stressful.”
You quickly shake your head. “Not stressful at all. I’m just trying to grasp why I was called here.” Surely Jamie had a family member to ring up, or even one of the people currently in the room, who seem to care about him very much. You walk closer to Jamie’s bedside to see if there are any damages to his face that you might’ve not been able to see from afar. Your heart beats at a less-rapid pace when you see that physically, he looks fine. He catches your eye with a smile as you look down at him.
Ted Lasso speaks up. You never thought you’d see him in the flesh, just a person on your television that you see when you eat dinner alone. “Well, Jamie here has been hassling us to see his lady since he’s been up. It’s nice to finally put a face to the name! ‘Been a long hour of wonderin’.”
Before you can even retort, like how you didn’t even know Jamie had a girlfriend (like why would you be here if Jamie wants to see his girlfriend—your heart sinks lightly at the thought, but it seems all too selfish to care about that when Jamie’s in a worrying predicament), the blonde girl speaks up.
“You know, I will say that I was mad hurt when I found out Jamie has a girlfriend and didn’t even tell us.”
Yeah, you think. He didn’t tell you, either.
A tall man grunts from beside her. “How long have you lot been going out, anyway?”
Your head snaps in his direction, eyes wide.
Jamie’s voice cuts through the room, “For Christ’s fucking sake, can you all stop bombarding her with questions?” He reaches out a small distance to grab your hand and pull you closer to his bedside, your hip now resting against the bed. “It’s fucking annoying.”
Your mind freezes. You look down at your joint hands, then back to his face.
Surely this has to be some mistake. Jamie is telling everyone that you’re his girlfriend. You can’t tell if he’s joking or not; if this is some sort of bit he wants to play on the very many people in this room that care about his well being. The only time you’ve gotten even close to touching Jamie was whenever his fingers would brush against yours to pick up a crate of carrots. You don’t even know what the inside of his house looks like! There are many facts about him that—though, you would like to know—you don’t know at all. And now he’s gone and told everybody that you’re dating!
The only thing you do know, is that you and Jamie have now got five pairs of eyes on you.
And they all think that you’re in a relationship.
“Jamie…” you say, tip-toeing through your next words to make sure you don’t say something that will put him into shock. “How hard did you hit your head?” His hand remains firmly in your own.
He pouts, turning to a man who’s sitting on a chair in the corner. He’s pouting guiltily, still in his Richmond kit with dirt on his knee pads.
“Pretty fucking hard,” the man mumbles. His fingers are fidgeting, and you recognize him as Richmond’s captain—Isaac.
The nurse standing by you nods. “Essentially,” he says, shrugging.
“Like—extremely hard?”
The nurse sighs. “I’m surprised it’s just a concussion. But nothing seems to be truly wrong; the X-rays would’ve shown.”
(Clearly something more than a concussion must have happened for Jamie to believe that you’re his girlfriend!)
“Are there any medications, protocol that we should be aware of, Nurse?” Ted chimes in, leaning closer to the center of the room.
“Recommended actions will be included in his discharge papers. I would say wait a day or two before taking any pain medication. Avoid bright lights, like the telly or your phone. I suggest wearing sunglasses outdoors—though I don’t think that’d be any different than usual. Other than that, I think you will heal just fine. But until then, it looks like your girlfriend has to be your nurse for a bit.”
You choke up again at the mention of that term, a dry cough riding up your throat. Eyes snap towards you, concern immediately filling each iris.
“Love,” says Jamie, voice in clear pain over his misinterpretation of your emotions. “I’m going to be okay. I always get better. You know that.”
No, you wanted to say, I don’t know that. You wanted to close your eyes and count to ten—meditate maybe, and think of your next moves. You wanted to be back home, stirring broth in a pot instead of getting tangled up in a fiasco that you’re ill-equipped for.
Unfortunately, none of those are an option for you. And, as you look at Jamie in his hospital gown, your heart constricts. Something plucks a small melody on your heartstrings as you stare into his glazed and hopeful eyes. Hopeful for you.
You try to give your best smile. One that says, it’s going to be okay. If you worry, it’s clear Jamie will worry. It’s obvious by his expression that his sole focus at the moment is you.
You’re not sure how convincing the smile is. You feel like a fraud, pretending to be something for Jamie that you’re clearly not. You’re far from being his girlfriend, or even someone Jamie could fancy if his head hadn’t been so fucked up.
But maybe, though, the smile is convincing enough: his face is elated at your positive acknowledgement towards him.
“Fucking gross.”
Your body snaps around, yet again acutely aware of the presence of multiple bodies around you, all looking at you and Jamie the same: confusion mixed with wonder (or disgust). It’s clear, though, that the voice had come from Roy Kent himself.
(He’s known for these things, you guess.)
Frowning, you turn back to Jamie.
“Oi,” snaps Jamie, eyes shifting gloweringly to Roy. “She hasn’t got a clue of your attitude yet. Pipe down.”
Not wanting to upset Roy Kent, you shake your head vigorously. “Don't even worry. I’m just a little caught off guard at the moment.” You clear your throat, “Um… do you suppose I can speak to the doctor quickly?”
“Doctor!” says Ted loud and eccentrically, no doubt in hopes that his obnoxious manner would lighten the mood. “Let her see the doctor!”
“Get the fucking doctor here!” says Keeley to the nurse, who merely sputters in return.
“I-I’ll fetch her right now.”
It only takes a minute for a woman to peek her head through the door. “I heard I am needed.”
Roy groans, and she smirks at him like they both know something that not many get.
“Jamie’s lovely lady wants to have a word with you,” says Ted with a grin when you take a beat too long to reply for yourself.
She turns her head to you, and you nod.
“Yes,” you say. Prying your hand gently from Jamie’s, you follow the doctor. “I’ll be back,” you add softly.
Once the door is closed behind you two, a large and panicked breath releases from your lips. You finally get to feel how clammy your hands have gotten. “Listen, Doctor…” you look at her quizzically.
“—Doctor O’Sullivan,” she says.
“O’Sullivan. Thank you.: You breathe in. “I’m not very sure how to say this, but I’m really fucking confused at the moment. Kind of freaking out confused.”
The woman in front of you doesn’t hesitate to place a comforting hand on your elbow. “Is everything alright? Roy had said you were Jamie’s girlfriend; I know how hard this could be on—“
“--That’s the problem!” you can’t help but interrupt, eyes wide and frantic with worry. “I’m not Jamie’s girlfriend. I’m just his neighbor! I’m not sure how him banging his head led me to believe otherwise, but—but I don’t know what to do.”
The doctor stares back at you, mouth agape.
“Yeah,” you sympathize, nodding your head. “I know.”
Her mouth opens and closes repeatedly. “Um,” she begins, “out of all things you could’ve said… I wasn’t expecting that to come out of your mouth.”
You nod frantically, your voice going down to a worried whisper. “Is his head—like—okay? I’m worried that if he’s remembering stuff that isn’t true, then something may be very wrong with his brain, or whatever part he hit.”
Dr. O’Sullivan sighs, looking down at her clipboard before jotting something down. “Memory loss… things like that tend to happen with the concussion he has. I would be far more concerned if the X-rays showed any trauma, but he truly does seem to be fine. My guess is his memory will come back—maybe slowly, but it will certainly recollect.”
“But do I tell him now?” you ask, in a minor panic. If someone this morning had told you that your neighbor (the one you have been minorly crushing on, mind you) would suffer from a concussion that rendered him thinking you two are in an established relationship… well, you probably wouldn’t know what to say in that situation. But this certainly hadn’t even been in your mind for unexpected things that could possibly happen.
“My recommendation right now would be no; don’t startle him. His concussion has only just occurred, and it’s best not to confuse him even more. The first and most important goal is to get him back home to rest. Just check in on your comfortability as you go through this, okay? I’ll give you my personal cell, in case you have any dire questions.” She writes down her number on a piece of paper before ripping it off and handing it to you.
You neatly tuck it into your pocket, nervously smiling at her. “Thank you.”
“Of course,” she replies with a more assured smile compared to yours. She rubs your shoulder comfortingly. “I mean it when I say reach out. This will be difficult to navigate.”
You nod, giving her one last look before you re-enter the room apprehensively. It’s quiet when the door creeks and all eyes are on you, as if wanting to observe your next move. In the array of eyes, Jamie is looking at you with an expectant look, a large smile on his lips as you fidget with the rings on your finger awkwardly. You want to run out of the room, but you remember Dr. O’Sullivan’s words: Don't startle him.
“Jamie,” your voice is hoarse. The entire group leans a little closer at the sound of your voice, awaiting your next words. You clear your throat. “I’m very worried about you.”
His smile dims. “I’m sorry,” he says guiltily, “I should’ve been more careful.”
Everyone else in shock by his quick admission to his wrongdoings, Isaac stands up suddenly. “It’s my fault, bruv. Your girl should be mad at me.” He bows his head ashamedly. “I’m so sorry.”
You frown, shaking. “I think everyone in the room can agree that none of this is intentional.” You look around the room for confirmation. “Right?”
“Jamie’s lady is right!” says Ted. And then, “—wait, does me referring to you at Jamie’s lady dehumanize you? I apologize on my behalf. You are your own woman!”
That manages a small laugh from you. It’s clear Ted’s good-naturedness isn’t just a personality created in the papers. “I’m feeling perfectly humanized, thank you. I don’t blame anyone, I’m just glad you’re okay, Jamie. But I’m very worried. You don’t … seem the best.” You think that we are dating, when all I do is give you fresh veggies. “I want you to get better.” I want you to get your own memories back, because this fabrication in your head is extremely, medically concerning. “But it could be worse!” you add at the end. You could’ve forgotten your own identity, so there’s that!
The room is silent.
“I don’t know about y’all,” begins Ted. “But I’m lovin’ the element of concern with added positivity! You’re right, it could’ve been worse! Jamie could be dead.”
“Too much, Ted,” says Rebecca softly.
Roy grunts. “I thought that was a wonderful, brief visual.”
Jamie’s nose scrunches up in disgust. “What the fuck, man?”
The older man grunts, angrier. “I said brief.”
You can’t tell if his comments are a joke or not.
Jamie, appearing to sense your uncomfortableness, is quick to reply, “Oi! What did I say about her not knowing your fucking attitude?”
“It’s okay!” you squeak, not wanting to create more problems in the room. “Let’s focus on getting you home first.” Don't startle him. You need to ease Jamie into any shocks that he might face. You don’t know if there’s anything else Jamie might have misconstrued due to his concussion. For all you know, the poor guy might forget another giant aspect of his life. He needs to rest. “Did you lot by chance take his car here?”
Keeley nods quickly. “I drove it from the stadium. It’s parked out front.”
“Perfect,” you say, turning back to the man of the hour. “Jamie, is it okay if she drives it back to yours?”
“As long as I get to ride with you.”
Your heart rate strikes at his reply. This is something that is going to take time to get used to. “Good with me. Let’s get you home.”
The arrangement to take him home is simple enough, maybe even the easiest thing you have had to face since arriving. Jamie had already signed his discharge papers, and was free to walk on his own. He manages to look normal enough, but it’s a unanimous agreement for him to not drive on his own. Keeley is off to drive Jamie’s car back to his place, already knowing his new address. He bids goodbye to the rest of the group, and they offer their own forms of condolences (Roy’s is just a grunt).
“It’s a pleasure meeting you!” says Ted. “You’re gonna have to stop by Nelson Road sometime. You know, introduce you to the rest of the team.”
You fight a frown, because you shouldn’t. You probably won’t. But, hating to be rude to Ted, you reciprocate his hospitality with a warm smile. “I appreciate that. It was wonderful to meet everyone, even in these circumstances. I’m glad that Jamie is in the right hands.”
Ted nods solemnly. “Always. Now, go take care of that son of a gun!”
—
“Don't ever think I’ve ever been in your car before,” mumbles Jamie sadly. You’ve never been in my car. Or my home. Nor have I ever been to yours.
You fight the thoughts running through your head, about to comment on his dejectedness, when you remember what Dr. O’Sullivan had said about Jamie avoiding sunlight. “Wait!” You open your glove compartment, shuffling through the various coins and junk inside until you find what you’ve been looking for.
The sunglasses may not be what Jamie prefers. They belong to your younger cousin, Jolie. Sometimes you’re tasked with picking her up from school when your aunts can’t. Along with the task of picking her up and babysitting the six-year-old for a few hours, you often find things that she had left behind, or forgotten. You keep the hot pink cat-eye sunglasses for whenever she’s in your car and wants to put them on (they make her feel older). They may be a little small on Jamie, but you don’t care. His concussion is going to be treated attentively on your watch, whether he is okay with that or not. It’s the least you feel that you can do, considering roleplaying as his girlfriend isn’t exactly ideal.
“Here you are!” you happily exclaim, unfolding the sunglasses, putting them on by yourself before he can get a chance to protest.
The thing is, you truly don’t know what Jamie is like. You’ve had multiple interactions, but all so surface-level that it’s hard to tell if it’s a front he’s put up or not. For all you know—and for what you expect—he’ll take the sunglasses off and question why he has to wear that pair (toxic masculinity, and all that bullshit that you’re accustomed to from men).
To your surprise, he doesn’t even make a move to adjust them. Instead, he moves the rearview mirror to get a better look at himself. You giggle lightly as he moves his face around to observe his look.
The sound makes him smile. “I look good. These mine now?”
You scoff. “They’re Jolie's, don't even think about it,” you reply starkly, not even thinking about the fact that he doesn’t know who Jolie is.
For Jamie, however, that appears to be the first thing he thinks about. Because there’s a moment-long pause, and it feels very thick, before he replies, “Jolie?”
“Oh—my cousin,” you say plainly. You begin to pull out of your spot, checking your side mirror to see if any cars are coming by.
You might’ve been driving for a minute, silently. You aren’t sure what to say because, again, this is not the type of interaction with Jamie that you’re used to. Besides, you figure that maybe the silence will be good since Jamie has spent god-knows how long in absolute worry and chaos. Your mind goes back to the soup on your stove. You had turned the heat off, and placed the lid on your pot to finish when you get home.
Jamie is the first to break the silence. He says your name slowly, almost embarrassingly.
You furrow your brows at his tone, giving him a quick glance before laying your eyes back on the road. “Yes? Is everything alright?”
“Am I—“ he clears his throat, “Am I supposed to know about Jolie? Have we spoken about her before? I just don’t remember anything about her.”
You’re in shock for a moment, not expecting that question to come from him.
You realize, at this moment, the weight of Jamie’s concussion. Not only is it going to be physically taxing for him to avoid doing certain things until he’s better, but the mental toll of feeling like he doesn’t remember things will also certainly pain him. He thinks that the two of you are together—meaning he expects himself to know aspects about your life that you two had never discussed before.
Not only is Jamie a blank slate to you, but you are to him.
The only problem is he thinks that the blank slate is wrong.
“I’ve never spoken of her before, Jamie,” you say softly.
You hear him exhale.
“You don’t need to worry about forgetting, okay?” you add. “If I’m very concerned by anything you don’t seem to remember, I’ll be sure to tell you. And I’m sure everyone at work will do the same, as well.” You take a left turn, following the GPS on your phone back to your neighborhood.
“Thank you,” he says. “I’m sorry.”
“You don’t need to apologize. I’m here to support you. Patiently.”
A less-tense silence fills the car for the remainder of the drive. Jamie has his head leaning against the passenger window. You don’t need to see under the glasses to know that his eyes are shut, likely to gain as much rest as possible.
When you finally arrive back at your neighboring homes, Keeley is already sitting on the steps that lead to Jamie’s door, his car parked perfectly in his usual spot.
After parking as close to Jamie's home as possible (you’ll fix your spot later), you move to open his passenger door, but he gets out by himself. He places his hand on the small of your back, guiding you off the edge of the street and onto the sidewalk.
Keeley smiles softly at the pair in front of her, extending her hands to give you Jamie’s set of keys. “Hey, guys!”
You smile back, quietly using the keys she just handed you to unlock Jamie’s front door while the two converse behind you on his current state. She worriedly asks him how his head feels, to which Jamie gives a very detailed explanation on how it feels like a giant is squeezing around his head with a pressure that can pop his brains out.
“Gross,” mumbles Keeley. “Please go to bed.”
“Yeah, yeah,” says Jamie, “that’s what everyone’s telling me. Thanks for bringing me car, I appreciate it.”
“Of course. My payment requirement is—sorry to jam it—get some fucking rest.” She stands by the doorway as you and Jamie enter his house. “Roy’s a couple of minutes away. I’m gonna wait out here and contemplate stealing those peonies from that house down there.”
You pause. “… That’s my place.”
“Oh shit! My bad, babe. I promise I wasn’t going to do anything.”
You laugh. “Please, go ahead if you would like. I’ve been told it’s practically a forest.”
She laughs. “Maybe next time. Stay safe, yeah?” She’s walking down the steps as you both bid her a goodbye.
You smile up at Jamie as he guides you further down his hallway, and into the kitchen. He immediately goes into his fridge to pull out some water, chugging it down.
You stand in your spot awkwardly, watching as Jamie pulls the sunglasses further up when his head finally levels from drinking. “...Um, if you don’t need anything else, do you think you’ll be fine on your own?” you ask. You feel better now that Jamie is in the comfort of his own home. “I had food on the stove, and wanted to finish it up. I’ll have a bowl for you as well, if you’d like.” You already make a plan in your head to put it in an isolated thermos to leave on his doorstep so that he can still access it and have his alone time.
“But you’ll be back, right?”
Your brows furrow. “Do you want me to come back?”
“Of course,” he says, like it’s the thing he’s most sure of.
You smile. “Then I’ll be back,” you reply, mind scrapping the doorstep plan. “With creamy vegetable soup.”
“Fuck yeah,” he says. He closes the fridge and makes his way to you.
You don’t know what you’re expecting… maybe a hug at most.
But your eyes shoot up as Jamie leans down, his lips puckering slightly as his face inches closer to yours.
You instinctively place your hand on his chest, quickly stopping him from going any further. “Woah, wait.”
Jamie pulls back further immediately, his brows furrowing from above the pink sunglasses he wears. If this were any other situation, you’d find his look comical.
“What’s wrong, love?” he says so sweetly that you may feel sick, if the nickname isn’t enough to nearly make you faint. He places a hand on your shoulder, rubbing softly.
You try your best to conjure up words for this situation, as well as trying to concentrate on the conversation instead of the soft ministrations on your shoulder. “It’s just—we’re moving too fast. You’re moving too fast.”
“Huh?” replies Jamie quizzically, “Do we not… kiss?” When your eyes hold more panic, he makes the conclusion for himself. “So, we’re dating and we’ve never kissed? Am I a fucking idiot?” The last part is mostly to himself, and you backtrack immediately, rewiring your brain into thinking of a half decent explanation.
“I mean… I don’t know. I just feel bad,” you say. “You have a concussion and don’t remember some things. I don’t want to overwhelm you, and make you do things that you might regret.”
Jamie frowns. “Why would I regret kissing you?”
You wince, making the edges of his lips turn down even more.
He looks as if he’s been punched in the gut. “...Would it make you uncomfortable? If I kissed you?”
“It—“ you think about it for a moment. You don’t think kissing Jamie would make you uncomfortable at all. It is something you fantasize about, but only when you’re alone. And not under these circumstances. So, you reply truthfully, “I think it would,” because you just can’t find it in you to physically reciprocate affection that was never properly established in the first place.
“Is it because I don’t remember our first kiss?”
There never was one. “… Yeah.”
Jamie looks off before nodding. “Okay. I’ll do everything in my power to remember,” he says surely.
Well, shit. It’s going to be very hard for Jamie to try and remember something that never even happened. You wonder now if you should just alleviate the guilt right now, and break the truth to him: you have never dated, nor even kissed once. Maybe the interactions you’ve had with him when handing over a batch of carrots seemed delusionally romantic in your mind, that’s not how it went at all.
There’s a feeling in you that makes you want to take care of Jamie and make sure that he’s okay. The thought of abandoning him now feels almost cruel, he clearly trusts you enough to keep you around.
Normally, this would be no issue.
But with what you know, a heavy weight fills your chest.
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