#oh yeah side note

[feelo-fick]

HEY

HAVE MY (STILL VERY SHORT BUT WORKING ON IT BUT ALSO ITS 11 PM AND I WANNA POST THIS RIGHT NOW) CHILAIOS PLAYLISTS 🔥🔥🔥🔥

[shmorp-mcdurgen]

if i give shadow mark a forehead kiss (/p obviously) would i die

You wouldn't die but they'd be. very confused.

[aashidoodles]

[lily-onher-grave]

okay okay okay thoughts/excited ramblings about the wicked movie under the cut bc i've seen it and now i'm insane about it again

let's be real it's kinda hard to fumble the opening number of a musical especially when that opening number is no one mourns the wicked and yet i was still absolutely blown away it was SO GOOD

the lil munchkins running, the singing in the streets, the posters of the witch (side note all the artwork was insanely good and just added so much to the style of oz i feel like) it was all so awesome

NOMTW becomes so sinister and they nailed it

obligatory emotional babbling about glinda standing alone in the crowd as everyone sings 'the wicked's lives are lonely'

before i left for the theater i was like 'take your bets on if i'll cry' and my roommate and i agreed that yeah obviously i would. but what i didn't expect is for ariana's sad face to knock me out in five minutes flat. i was done for

the effigy. holy shit. and handing the torch to glinda. i want to go see the whole thing again just so i can rewatch that scene. my heart still hurts

(also nanny! sort of not really. but i liked the childhood scenes i liked that elphaba had one (1) good thing in her life before shiz)

SHIZ okay shiz honestly shiz was the thing i was most excited for bc c'mon, we don't write about our gothic magic school all the time in fic for nothing. and honestly it was so good. the shots of the whole castle! the library design! the balcony moments and the stairways and just like the layers of architecture and the way morrible could kind of be anywhere at any time. the way it felt so grand and yet so small at the same time. idk man the vibes were good and the set was beautiful

glinda arriving by boat was magical that's all

the way everything dillamond had was tailored to him was fantastic it was so good

actually i want to shout out the library set design again and how it tied into the clockwork theme that never gets fully called out even in the musical but it's still so good

where's my time dragon clock tho

also back up the scene where elphaba loses her temper in the courtyard--when she breaks the relief of the wizard, there's old artwork of Animals behind it and i gasped out loud when i saw it

and that was the first moment i thought 'this is brilliant but i still want an hbo dark fantasy political drama tv show based on the book'

speaking of the dark fantasy political drama tv shows, the Animal meeting!! i'm so glad they put more stuff like that in there

actually as a whole the movie felt more grounded and less comedic than the musical. i think they did a fantastic job of keeping the magic and silliness and charm and wonder of the show while still adding those extra bits of drama and dire circumstances

anyway gelphie fic prank wars trope is officially canon great work everybody handshakes all around. i was cackling (silently. i promise i'm a respectful moviegoer)

the ozdust ballroom being illegal makes so much sense. it being underwater was fucking cool. boq and nessa were actually really great and i usually don't care about them at all during this scene

also i love love love nessa and i cannot wait to see more of her. but showing her multiple times on the sidelines when elphie was being humiliated was such a good choice. the tension between nessa obviously caring for her sister yet always caring for herself more is so delicious and i always want to see it fleshed out more, and i think they did such a good job with her? her and elphaba have sweet moments which i love, and her wanting to be independent and only elphaba really understanding that is so so good. and having her just watching elphaba for so long before finally saying she can't watch. god i can't wait to see her be desperate and selfish and cold in act 2, it's gonna be so good

side note boq also looking upset by elphie being bullied. i miss my brotp man

but let's talk about what's most important: the gelphie dance. because oh my god i started crying all over again. so did elphaba. and glinda wiping her tears i'm dying i've died oh my god

i always get a little bit surprised when glinda seems more head over heels than elphaba. idk why. but ariana's glinda is absolutely more head over heels than cynthia's elphaba and i loved it

(they just. freaking LEFT the party. just zipped out of there as soon as they hugged. glinda was like hmmm i just realized some things and grabbed elphaba's hand and ran off while the night was young. and fiyero stared after them knowing that he stood no chance whatsoever)

also i'm like 72% sure the guys sitting next to me were a couple? and they both cried during the gelphie dance too and it was a very unexpected but very funny moment of solidarity

i say ariana's glinda is more head over heels and i stand by it but elphaba's fond little smile when glinda was pouting about sharing secrets almost made me start sobbing again they're so GOOD they're so CUTE and she is SO heart eyes for glinda immediately!!!

i need to be sedated i swear

popular was adorable 10/10 no notes absolutely nailed it i loved every second

also glinda sitting next to elphaba in class now. my heart <3

after dillamond gets hauled away (again with this being more violent and dark and those moments of drama coming through more in the movie i loveeee) glinda doesn't sit down until elphaba does

also they had several little moments of elphaba looking to glinda and glinda either shaking her head or nodding. they've been friends for 2 days and they're already having silent conversations i love them <3

the poppy spell? was sick as hell????

another seeing of wicked, another complete sense of bafflement as to why fiyero is there

i say this jokingly but the fiyero and elphaba romance really does feel like a product of the early 2000s especially now that it's on screen rather than on stage. idk maybe that's just the lesbian in me talking though

the train design is also sick but we knew that from the trailers

okay look logically yes i knew idina and kristin would have cameos. but i'd been crying on and off and one short day's magic had already taken hold so they caught me completely off guard. it was great

the wizard stuff was really sweet. and while i was hoping for more time put toward shiz and stuff, i do think those moments did a great job of 1) showing how much elphaba just wants to be loved 2) foreshadowing the wizard being her father and 3) laying the groundwork for her briefly considering working with the wizard in act 2, which is a decision that never quiteee feels right in the show

i love that they put more lore into the grimmerie btw. very cool

the hot air balloon was random but fun. i wonder if it'll come up again in act 2

every time. every damn time glinda starts singing in defying gravity i just want someone to end it right there. glinda grabs the broom, it fades to black, and they both lived happily ever after

fuck

defying gravity taking place at sunset because it's at the end of their one short day of happiness

also UM morrible coming up and hugging glinda when she's crying. exquisite emotional manipulation i'm screaming

elphie! seeing! her! inner! child! i loved the baby elphie scenes even though i prefer creepy 'horrors' elphaba always. but seeing her come back was sooooo fucking good

elphaba only ever relying on herself, in the end

glinda's final 'i hope you're happy' took me out, as it always does, as it always should. and reaching out from the balcony? i'm sobbing again

morrible dragging glinda into the darkness while elphaba flies into the sun! someone fucking help me i'm already wrecked by these two

honestly my biggest complaint is that now i have to wait for part two, i want to see the rest nowwwww

[pixelartpeach]

GUZMA HEADCANON MASTERLIST

I have an unhealthy attachment to this guy

As such, I have had way too many thoughts about him and how he exists in my headcanons.

This is going to be your problem now.

Ahem.

BASICS

His full name is Guzmania Kala'i Sasaki. His mom picked out his name, and his first name came from the fact that when they first got their house, his parents' first housewarming gift was a guzmania bromeliad. Guzma thinks this is stupid and refuses to go by his full name.

His mom is Alolan. His dad is Kanjohni. His grandma on his dad's side is from Johto, and his grandpa was from Kanto.

Mom's name is Crysantha, dad's name is Nasu.

Only child. He quickly became way too much for his parents to handle.

His grandma is a former Kimono Girl, Miki (the one who gets harrassed on stage by a Rocket grunt in HG/SS), and her Flareon's name is Ichigo.

Was part of a mischief trio with Kukui and Molayne back when he was a kid.

POKÉMON TEAM

Six-teamer, and proud of it. Dustpan the Golisopod, Hazard the Ariados, Syrup the Masquerain, X the Vikavolt, Launchpad the Pinsir, and Tachi the Scizor. He only trains male Pokémon because he doesn't want to deal with eggs.

Dustpan: Caught as a Wimpod before he was licensed. 8-year-old Guzma went to the Akala beach with his parents, then lured a Wimpod into his backpack with cucumber sandwiches. Spent the whole ferry ride home trying to hide his squirming backpack. Dustpan lived under his bed for awhile, eating scraps of whatever Guzma tossed down there, and it took him AWHILE to trust the kid.

Hazard: Short for "Tripping Hazard," Guzma was supposed to do a report on local Pokémon for school and went hunting, then tripped over the Spinarak's web and lost him his prey. Hazard then proceeded to give him the biggest, saddest wet puppy eyes about it, so Guzma felt bad and caught him a Cutiefly. Hazard never stopped following him around after that.

Syrup: Caught at Brooklet Hill with a net, then when Guzma went to take him out of the net, covered his hand in sweet syrup (according to the Pokédex, they do that when scared to repel flying types). Guzma, gremlin he is, licked his hand, then decided to keep the Surskit.

X: Kukui, Molayne, and Guzma all went off trying to follow a poorly-drawn treasure map that had been tucked into a book in the school library. When they got to the "X" on the map, they dug it up, and found a Grubbin instead of treasure. The other two were disappointed, but Guzma got spiteful about it and loudly declared that obviously, the Grubbin was the treasure they were supposed to find, and caught it.

Launchpad: Caught in Johto during a bug catching contest while on vacation, can and will yeet anything on sight. Including Guzma and his friends. STILL can, even when they're all grown men. He's not the brightest, but he'll do anything Guzma asks enthusiastically.

Tachi: The only one Guzma didn't catch himself, the Kahuna of Ula'Ula had Guzma doing odd job requests when he lived in Tapu Village to help him get on his feet, and one of those requests was an old man from Malie asking for a Heracross. Guzma caught him the Heracross, and in exchange, got Tachi the Scyther, who had "a lot of fighting spirit, deserving of an expert battler."

BATTLING

Guzma trains his 'Mons with a clicker, or clicks his tongue when the clicker isn't available, and only shouts his moves when he's either dealing a final blow, cut off from quieter noises, or panicking. He also gives them hand signals. Whenever he starts off a fight, they'll look at him to see how they should be doing it: Hand held low for "cool it, not a serious fight," high for "stakes are high, fight with whatever you've got," and a finger across his neck for "don't hold back, destroy them."

Side note, Tachi had to be retrained on this system. His former trainer used a sports whistle.

For the most part, Guzma's team is well-enough trained to take on most fights without play-by-play direction. They just need a general nudge or signal: "stall for me," "play evasive," "tank the hit," and they'll figure the rest out. When they're unsure or he clicks for them to look, they'll glance his way for new direction.

Guzma is THE strongest trainer in Alola, barring the Champion, and a lot of that is because of his strategy. Type disadvantage and Pokémon effectiveness is only HALF the game; the other is figuring out what your opponent is trying to do, and throwing them off so they doubt their own strategy. He absolutely excels at the latter.

He crouches down when he battles so he can see things from a lower perspective, mostly to watch smaller Pokémon or to monitor larger ones' footwork. That it makes him look casually badass is a bonus point in his book.

FAMILY

Nasu Sasaki: Something of a brick wall of a man, he and Guzma share the same anger issues, but he's colder about it. Very reserved, very acutely aware of how he's perceived, and irritated that Guzma isn't. Plays golf to work out stress, because it's nice to hit something and watch it sail away. Holds himself to a high standard of perfection.

Crysantha Sasaki: The complete opposite, sweet and loving to the point of saccharine. Refuses to believe her family can do any wrong, will brush aside any wrongdoing with a smile. Scolds Guzma like a puppy when she's disappointed in him—picture the "Guzma, what's wrong with you?" line being said in a high-pitched, patronizing voice with hands on hips.

Miki Sasaki: Kimono Girl Miki. The only family Guzma's actually regularly in touch with of his own liking. Very traditionally Johtonian, loves Guzma and was proud of him as a kid, doesn't exactly approve of his gang activity, but lets him stay at her place and have tea whenever he likes. Has been BARELY on speaking terms with her son since the Golf Club Incident. Probably the reason Guzma hasn't dropped the "Sasaki" name, tbh.

Hideomi Sasaki: In HG/SS, he's the older guy with the Psyduck in the crowd when Miki's getting harrassed by the Rocket Grunt. From Kanto. He died of old age when Guzma was small, but Guzma has fond memories of building Palossand castles and finding shells with him.

HISTORY

Oh boy.

Always was a loud, brash kid. Very much a "fight" over "flight" when scared, and, much as he would refuse to admit it, he got scared a LOT.

Fueled by three things: fear, approval, and spite. Spite is what led to him becoming a Bug specialist; he had a Wimpod that he tried to send into battle, and when that didn't work out, he got mocked; bug-catchers aren't exactly respected, and he got teased relentlessly for it, people asking if he was going to send out a Metapod next and Harden it to death. So he leaned fully into the Bug-typing with the intent to destroy everyone in school with his team. He still never picked up a Caterpie, though.

Used to sneak out a lot. He had a rule to be home by curfew, but he broke it often, so his dad had his Houndoom watch after him from afar and drag him home if he ever got into trouble. That's all well and good, until one day when he was 7. He'd read in second-grade geology that peridots came from volcanic activity, got starry-eyed, and wanted to go to Ten Carat Hill to find treasure. Ten Carat Hill, however, is strictly off-limits, so his parents said no. Naturally, he snuck out after dark to go there anyways. The peak of Ten Carat is Rockruff territory. Guzma got cornered by a Midnight Lycanroc that was ready to gut him, but his dad's Houndoom fought it off...and lost. He ran home in tears to get help, but by the time they got back, she was done for. That Houndoom had been his dad's partner Pokémon back in Johto, since she was a little Houndour. Nasu never really forgave Guzma for killing his best friend, and Guzma grew up feeling like his dad would have picked the Houndoom over him any day.

Has had celebrity crushes on Cynthia, Diantha, and Steven Stone. He has a thing for people who look fancy.

Had a highschool relationship with Kahili, who he knew from following his dad to Akala to play golf. Mostly dated her because she could squarely own his old man in the field, and that was a fun feeling. Also why they broke up; she decided she didn't want to be his victory lap. Understandable breakup.

The golf club thing: A very, very, VERY bad day when Guzma was a teenager and he and his dad were in a yelling match, Nasu hit him in the back with one of the clubs once to teach him a lesson. It TERRIFIED Guzma. Less so about the damage itself, more that Nanu had crossed a line he couldn't take back, and what's to stop him from doing it again? So he took his dad's prized golf clubs up to Route 3, and spent the whole night smashing them against boulders and denting them beyond repair. Can't wield what's broken. Sort-of backfired, because his dad insisted that the golf clubs were kept on display after, that way whenever they had guests over, Guzma would be reminded that his "actions had consequences on people's opinions of him." Guzma HATES those clubs and the shame now associated with them and wants to throw them in the ocean.

Guzma DID finish his Island Challenge, unlike most of Skull. What he DIDN'T do was make it to Trial Captain, like he wanted. The cutoff for Captain, as in, when you're too old to even remain a Captain, is 20. It took until Guzma was 18-going-on-19 for the singular Melemele spot to open up, and then when it did, he got passed up...in favor of an 11-year-old Ilima and his partner Eevee. That night, he went home late after punching trees and breaking glass to try to burn off his anger, got scolded by his parents, and decided "fuck both of you, I'm leaving," and ran away.

His dad chased after him, they had a Pokémon battle in the middle of the nighttime woods, his team of bugs vs his dad's (young) Houndour. Guzma won, but Nasu wasn't having it, so he tried to drag him back home, and Guzma punched him in the face. It wasn't on purpose. He honestly didn't mean it, he let his anger get the better of him, but he broke his dad's nose. And, when Nasu looked at him, stunned, blood dripping down his face, he panicked and bolted.

Guzma went to Ula'Ula. First to his grandmother, who lives in Malie, then when his mother came asking for him, off to the Kahuna's place in Tapu Village.

Kukui came along to check on him, which turned into a yelling match that destroyed their friendship. It started with asking Guzma what was wrong, then when finding out about the Captain thing, told him not to worry about it, it's not a big deal, HE'D given up on that dream ages ago. Which, to Guzma, was a HUGE betrayal; it was a pact they'd made when they were 12! They were going to be Captains together! And now Kukui's going to kick him while he's down about it?!

Poor Molayne quietly fell to the wayside. He didn't want to take sides, and clearly Guzma wasn't in the mood to hear advice from a friend—doubly so, he reasoned, from one that HAD made the Captain spot. So the whole trio fell apart.

Now Kahuna Kalei...man, he almost deserves his own post. Bulu's Kahuna before Nanu. Psychic specialist. Wanted to be a therapist before he got assigned his role. Spent most of his time helping Alola's troubled youth. He was a really stand-up guy, giving them housing when they needed it, finding them jobs, helping them adjust to things, etc. Guzma went to him, and got a place as roommate to Plumeria, and that's how they met.

Kalei, however, wasn't a great Kahuna. Don't get me wrong, he was a fantastic guy...to humans. Too much so. He wanted Ula'Ula to have more tourist revenue, so he started the Recycling Plant, helped polish up Malie Garden, had the bus routes built...had Po Town built, without the Tapu's approval...had the Thrifty Megamart built, without the Tapu's approval... It was all well-intentioned, sure. The kids he was in charge of would have jobs, Ula'Ula would thrive economically, etc. But you don't DO things without Tapu approval, ESPECIALLY not when you're supposed to be the Tapu's mouthpiece. So Bulu removed his lifetime position. Forcefully.

Guzma didn't SEE Kalei die, but he was in Tapu Village when Bulu started rampaging. It felt like an earthquake, at first, then plants started growing through the ground. All the kids got evacuated to the PMC, which was, miraculously, left alone. He was 22 at this point.

Side note, right after, Po Town got cursed with rain as a gentle sign of Bulu's displeasure with the people living there without his say-so. "Leave, I don't want you here."

Everyone was scared, naturally. Guzma too. The issue is that when Guzma's scared, he hits back. So he eventually got fed up with everyone cowering and grieving and decided he was going to make his OWN place. So he stormed off to Po Town, Plumeria following to make sure he didn't go fully self-destructive, and took over the manor at the far end of town, then told any neighbors and cops that had a problem with it that they could try battling him to force him out. Nobody local was strong enough, and the cops honestly had more important things to do in the wake of Bulu's wrath than deal with some upstart kid in a house nobody technically owned.

Was the manor occupied? ...Technically. The previous owners were hastily moving out, spooked by the Kahuna's death and the Tapu's wrath. Guzma bullied them into cutting their losses and leaving most of their furniture and finery behind, and the rich vacation getaway people decided it was NOT worth sticking around for.

Guzma and Plumeria made the place their own. They graffitti'd whatever and wherever they wanted, they had wine, they partied. They called themselves Skullbusters and Guzma DELIGHTED in making the neighbors flinch. Then slowly, the neighbors started leaving, and slowly, the other kids Kalei looked after started filtering in, wanting a place with Guzma (and nudged that way by invitation from Plumeria).

There's a trial to get in. You have to battle Guzma. And then when you lose, which you inevitably will, when he asks if you think you deserve in, you yell "no!" with all your chest (the first few times, he had to tell them "I can't hear you!"). And THEN he'll let you in.

It started off with everyone getting their own room, then sharing, then cuddle piles, then taking over the houses as the rich neighbors fled the worsening conditions and rowdy new kids next door. Soon enough, Po Town was theirs. "Skullbusters" wound up being too much of a mouthful in the long run, so it got shortened to "Skull."

Plumeria became the face of Skull, and Guzma, the looming threat behind it. Plumeria LOVED those kids, both the originals around her age that were in Tapu Village, and the people who joined in after. So if you mess with them, you get her as a warning. And Tapus help you if she thinks you haven't learned your lesson, because she'll get the big guns.

This led to Guzma throwing his weight around Ula'Ula. Who was going to stop him? The Kahuna? Fully embraced the chaos, loved being feared for once instead of stepped on, he embraced his dramatic, theater-kid side and made a heel out of himself. "Greetings, cowering public!" is just the latest of his attention-grabbing mottos; he'd regularly remind Ula'Ula of his strength by putting up a show in Malie Garden and letting any tourist or local that felt brave enough try to challenge him, only for him to crush them.

It was good for funds. For food, for awhile, they had berries in pots (since those things grow like weeds and never go out of season in Alola); that's not nutritionally sound, though, so Skull started stealing. And when that landed them in too-hot water for doing it too often, eventually, some of them (Guzma included) bit the bullet and started raiding the old Megamart. After the first few times where none of them died, it became their more stable source of meals.

Clothes are all Spinarak and Ariados silk. Guzma kicked it off, and it's worked just fine for all of them since. Hair colors and contacts are both for anonymity and expression (and they're not all pink and blue; there's variation).

Anyways.

Nanu came along at some point, realized what was up, and decided not to do anything about it; he knows Guzma and Plumeria are actually taking care of these misfits and delinquents, so he doesn't see a reason to step in, and Guzma thinks he's lazy for it, but he doesn't care.

Guzma. 25, king of his roost. Gets contacted one day by Aether President Lusamine. She's seen his shows, she watched him fight in Malie, and she thinks he's exactly what she's looking for. She needs some...distractions, and he's got the manpower, the muscle, and the lack of a spotless reputation. He just needs to cause some trouble so Aether can do their thing without the professors getting in the way. Guzma sees that as two birds with one stone: Spite Kukui (and his wife, but Guzma doesn't really care about Burnet), AND make more of a name for the kids that follow him. He might be scary, but his grunts definitely aren't, so this is a win-win.

And things develop. Lusamine starts showering him with praise. He gets hooked on it. Falls into a relationship with this Ninetales. Tells her everything, to get validation that he was right in the decisions he's been insecure about. And he fights Plumeria on it whenever she sees the red flags.

And OH the red flags. Lusamine is a master manipulator, and Guzma is one of the most gullible guys in Alola. She'd tell him everything he wanted to hear, get him to do what she wanted, praised him perfectly...and then do the complete opposite whenever he was inadequate. She knew how to make insults HURT. She knew exactly what combination of things would have him angry, destroy his self confidence, shove him into a depressive slump, then come crawling back to her with mumbled apologies in the hopes that she'd take him back. She took full advantage of the fact that he'd always been a screw-up, to everyone, even his parents, and that he would always view her allowing him back into her good graces as a favor he didn't deserve.

It didn't take long to get him to the point that he would do anything for her. He ignored her "private collection," excusing it as a messed up way she was dealing with being a widow. He kidnapped Lillie for her, reasoning that it wasn't REALLY kidnapping, she was just a runaway 11-year-old who didn't know how good she had it (with a mom that adored her and doted on her) and who couldn't battle in the wild, so he was really doing something right by her.

Side note, Gladion's a different story. He tried to join Skull the way all the grunts had, but then got arrogant when faced with the question of "do you think you deserve to be here," which is why the grunts don't like him very much.

Back to present day. The fight against the will-be-Champion happens. And he gets beat. Publicly. Every. Single. Time. It makes him FURIOUS. The first time, it was just Dustpan and Hazard, so fine, he got cocky. But after that? Beating him in front of his own grunts? In front of Aether? He LOATHES that kid.

Then the thing with Ultra Space happens.

Guzma, stranded in an alien world because Madame Prez asked him to, tries to catch her a Nihilego. Gets parasitized by it. Freaks out—Nihilego amplify the emotion most core to your being, and while that's obsessive euphoria in Lusamine, it's sheer terror in Guzma. Every big decision he's ever made has been fueled by fear—either to get control of his life, or to avoid shame, or both.

So he tries to stop Lusamine, thinking it'll do the same to her, and she turns on him. And completely lays into him. Fueled by her goal being so close and his usefulness having evaporated now that she's finally here, and seeing him as the one obstacle to her sweet Nihilego, she tears him apart. Calls him useless. A failure. No wonder Alola hates him. No wonder his parents never seemed to be happy with him. She certainly never loved him, and he was an idiot for thinking so.

And then she left him. Crushed. In the nightmare dimension. To chase after her poisonous nightmare herself. And he...let her.

Another side note: He had a suit properly tailored in case she ever asked him to a dance at her fancy manor. You know, for business reasons, or...something. He held onto it for months hoping she would ask him. And then this.

So Sun/Moon's conclusion happens. He's rescued. He tries to go home to Po Town, full of very, VERY fresh wounds and completely destroyed. Plumeria tries to hug him from behind, he reacts on instinct, whips around- And punches her in the face. She drops. It was an accident. He didn't realize. Nihilego's still fresh in his mind, getting grabbed from behind and parasitized is still a very, VERY new fear, so he reacted on instinct. And now his best friend is on the floor, spitting up blood, and—is that a tooth?

So he runs away. Just like he did when he popped a right hook on his dad. He can't stand not being in control, it terrifies him, and he runs.

So where to go to now? Not Po Town, he just HIT his now-ex best friend. Not to his grandmother's, he's still cut open from everything Lusamine said and he can't handle the uncertainty of sweet words, plus the lingering fear that he'll somehow hurt Miki, too. Everyone hates him, and he doesn't even have a leg to stand on after being publicly humiliated by that Champion kid. He goes home. Says he was wrong like Lusamine trained him to do and begs his parents for forgiveness. Because at least he knows where he stands with them.

Skull comes around knocking, because of course they do. He's their boss! Who jumped into a terror dimension, came home, and had a breakdown! Is he okay? Does he need them? Nope. Skull's done, everyone get lost. He can't do this anymore.

Enter Guzma's depression arc.

That's usually all the backstory I give him when I'm about to play him in a text rp or write fanfic about him. Everything leads up to the depression arc.

Ahem.

APPEARANCE

6'6.25" (198.75 cm) when standing at full height. Otherwise, 6'2" when slouching. If he's asked, he ALWAYS includes the quarter inch. "Makes it more believable that way."

Scars: Nihilego tentacle scars on his shoulders, upper arms, around his waist, and curled around his ankle. Carvanha bite on his calf. A handful of cuts on his hands from punching glass. Strike marks from the Golf Club Incident.

He's got piebaldism and he HATES it. It's just one lock on his forehead, slightly skewed to the left, with a tiny patch of paler skin at the hairline. When he was growing up, he dyed it black, then when he moved out, he decided to be contrary and bleached it all white, minus his undercut.

Made all his Skull clothes with Hazard's silk. It's not the greatest job, the stitches are all uneven, but it works for him.

Got the tattoos on his arms after deciding on Skull's name, then, after Sun/Moon, covered them up with concealer.

LOVES his jacket. Will not toss it whatsoever. The inner lining is full of badly-patched holes. The X made of tape on the back, covering up the custom Skull embroidery, was ironed on to make it melt in.

The Pokétch on his wrist is a fancy one left behind in the manor. He also loves that and will not get rid of it. He likes gold.

Ears are pierced, though he hasn't worn them in awhile. Used to have amethyst-and-gold studs in them.

Caught all his 'Mons in Net and Nest Balls, then transferred them to Ultra Balls to look scarier for his Malie Garden shows.

His Team Skull glasses were originally eclipse glasses, hence the sun and moon shapes. He got those back with Kalei, and back when they functioned as eclipse glasses, he used to show off to the other teens that he could walk around flawlessly with them on. He eventually popped the black film and replaced it with actual shade lenses, then got a real pair of shades when he disbanded Skull.

Silver eyes. Got them from his dad, who got them from Miki.

His curls are from his mom, though.

PERSONALITY, MENTALITY, AND MANNERISMS

Rubs his neck when shy or sheepish

Fingers in his hair when he feels as if he's done something wrong (easy way to tell if embarrassment is getting to be too much for him)

Berates himself mostly because if nobody else does, he'll feel even worse.

Flips up his hood when he wants to avoid being looked at

If he's angry and you don't challenge him on it, eventually he deflates and falls into "whatever" mode.

High highs and low lows. ECSTATIC when something makes him happy, quick to get swept up in the moment. People are cheering for him, he'll ham it up. He's pleasantly surprised, he's picking up the nearest person and spinning them around.

Incredibly easy to woo. If asked, he'll tell you his types are "1, into me, 2, breathing." That's not entirely true, his type is "pretties up nicely and carries confidence," but when he falls, he falls hard. Does not make the first move for self-esteem reasons.

Likes to tease in conversation, definitely cannot take it like he dishes it. Very easily flustered and blushy. Also fistpumps to himself when he's done something right, romance or otherwise.

A showoff. Give him ANY reason to peacock, and you'll have trouble getting him to cool it. Including dumb things (like walking around with eclipse glasses).

Talks with a drawl and in street dialect. He's always had something of a lazy voice when he enunciates, but he picked up the dramatic "bad guy" talk when he was a kid to look tough, from TV. His mom was NOT pleased about it and has yet to break him out of the habit.

MISC

Massive sweet tooth. Loves Tapu Cocoa, of course, but just generally a sugar bug. Likes Litchi and Pecha soda, and when he's in a drinking mood, either champagne or shochu highball.

Obv, depressed as all hell. But he's been swinging in and out of that for longer than he realizes; he's a very crash-and-burn kind of guy. Kick him at the wrong moment, and he sinks into self loathing and apathy, but give him something to get pumped about, and he's right there at the front with the megaphone. In school, this was apathy towards grades, tempered with enthusiasm after winning a battle, tempered back to sadness with disappointment on not getting first in a competition, and so on. In Skull, it was a week or so of sulking on the couch, drinking too much cocoa, before finding a reason to crush someone and party it up with the grunts again with a victory lap. He'd recognize his current state, being apathetic and tired at home with no upswing, as being depression, but before that? What are you talking about, he just had off-weeks.

Cutiefly are attracted to people with auras like flowers, according to their 'Dex entry. Guzma happens to be one of those people. He hates it, because they nest in his hair and look adorable, and HE is DESTRUCTION IN HUMAN FORM, thank YOU.

Has a taste for luxury. Knows what wine pairs with what, likes owning finery and sleeping in high-thread-count Swablu-down beds, knows how to dance just about any dance you can name.

Speaking of dancing, if you ask him, he'll say he's good at exactly three things: fighting, dancing, and surfing. Fighting encompasses both fistfights and battles, he KILLS it on the dance floor, and he's a showoff with tricks when he surfs.

Also speaking of dancing, owns the entire leaderboard of dance arcade games. Not just the high score, has gotten the high score on the hardest songs enough times that he's the ONLY score.

Knows basically anything about any Bug-type on Alola you can name, from prey to predators to ecological niche, and so on. Of course, HIS bugs are his specialty, but he made a point of being the expert.

Bisexual. Did not know bisexual was a thing for the majority of his life, thought people consciously picked one they liked more and (at first) found it annoying that people would lament not liking the other gender and get cliquey about it. Plumeria looked at him like he'd grown a second head when he first told her that (it was during their roommate phase under Kalei; she's a lesbian).

An ace at Voltorb Flip. Not an infallible ace, but enough that he more or less has to be dragged out when he's on a winning streak.

Used to pick up bottles from the Route 2 PMC's cafe and take them to Route 3 to smash them and burn off steam, then bring back the glass for recycling.

His usual order at that PMC was Tapu Cocoa with a dash of almond extract and a pinch of cinnamon, along with a square of butter mochi.

Won 2nd place in the Johto Bug Catching Contest, earning a silver bug net and taking home Launchpad the Pinsir.

Speaks Common (which is NOT English; my version of Pokémon world has a lingua franca everyone speaks that uses that weird alphabet nobody can translate), Johtonian, and Alolan. His Johtonian is better than his Alolan.

Went to Lake of the Sunne/Moone to relax whenever he needed alone time away from Team Skull.

Likes the rain, and since Skull, has trouble sleeping without it.

Decent singing voice. Not great, but good enough for karaoke.

Does NOT want kids, despite his experience with Skull's new recruits. Would not trust himself to be a dad.

Loves Kaiju movies, like Tyrannizilla vs Mothrim. Thinks Dynamax battles are peak entertainment.

Has a thing for normally-put-together people with messy hair and messed-up makeup. Especially if he's the reason for it.

Would be killer at drums if he took them up. Sometimes when I have him breaking out of his depression arc, I give him drums to hit instead of needing to smash glass.

Needs to take better care of his hair. I mean, he washes and combs it, sure, but he also bleaches it, and thinks "bodywash" and "shampoo" are interchangeable things.

The Tapus let him live after the whole "unleashing horrors on the island" thing because Bulu actually doesn't hate Guzma. He sees Guzma as filling the niche in Alola's ecosystem Kalei left behind, and being better at it.

Has a silver Lugia feather from his grandmother, as a graduation gift for when he finished school. It's strung on a cord necklace with glass and silver beads. He left it at his parents' house when he ran away from home way back when.

Anyone else grabbing his hair is an instant freeze from him. Not a pleasant one. It's so ingrained with his self-loathing tendencies that it starts to trigger a panic response.

And THAT is all the stuff that is currently coming to mind. I'm sure I have a lot more but I've been at this for over three hours and that's honestly too much already.

[astranauticus]

Director of the False Last Act

[misersdream]

Slay the Prince - Happily Ever After

[broareweabouttoviberightnow]

new thing I'm enamored with the concept of with is 'everyone in town is aware n treats Dallas like an adopted curtis siblin except for Dallas. who has dug his heels in so hard at this point is just slappin his palms over his ears n goin lalalala I dont know that I dont know them'

[aurieeeeeenyx]

anyways i just wanted to talk about baku's outfits in whc2

because his introduction portrays him as this loud, brash, shonen-esque character and pairs that vibe with a faceful of red: red shirt, red vest, red hair:

which he then follows up with at school! he's outgoing and his eye-catching color palette of choice reflects that

and after that, he continues wearing red; almost every outfit he dons must have something red in it

so when baku goes to find na baekjin in episode 4, it's kind of a big deal when the red shirt he always wears under his uniform is gone.

and of course, that brings us to union era baku's outfit: all black hoodie, shirt, pants, everything. by this point in the show we've really started to see baku's darker side (pun unintended) and how he acts when he's serious, instead of his usual silly goofy self that we've seen when he's with his friends and the eunjang kids.

it's not that he never wore an outfit without red before, but this is the longest period of time we've seen him go without it, and tbh, i love that the show pays attention to details like this.

i didn't finish the webtoon (webtoon lovers don't come for me i'll probably end up binging it in the next few days) so i don't know if this happens in the webtoon too, but i'm such a big fan of how his clothes reflect his mental state. union era baku is quiet. he doesn't emote much anymore. he's muted, almost a shadow of the larger-than-life character we met before. his darkness is violence, and guess what? back in episode 3 when juntae is explaining how baku fought the union guys to protect the eunjang kids, we see him wearing the very same shirt:

yeah. i just think that's interesting.

anyways, that makes it all the more gratifying to see him incorporate red into his outfits again after leaving the union

even though his outfit still features a lot of black, we're starting to see him return to the way he was, all because of...love. he loves the eunjang kids, he loves his dad (as complicated as that relationship is), and above all, he loves his friends. his friends were what he joined the union for, and his friends were what he abandoned the union for. his friends pulled him out of the darkness and into the light again.

red is the color of love, of blood, of fire. red is baku's color, and i'm so happy he brought it back.

[sleep-deprived-luka]

Gog au niigo for tonights doodle

[4sa]

Based on looks alone he'd make a great Mr. House

[thefourththefifth]

there’s no entryway. how’d he get in there.

[stars-obsession-pit]

A one-sided jazz x Jason or batkid idea

Okay before i get into my own thing, i wanna link this oneshot i found on AO3 which i think is rad

Growing up in Amity Park with mad scientists for parents had not engendered in Jazz a normal sense of danger. She was completely chill in situations that would make most others cower in fear. There’s a reason she was willing to live in as seedy a part of Gotham as she did instead of seeking out more expensive but theoretically safer student housing.

But even so, there were limits. And catching her neighbor climbing up the fire escape at night heavily armed and covered in blood and gore went way beyond them. She is not living next door to a serial killer! Especially considering the way she’d caught him staring at her recently…

Which brought her here, packing her bags as quickly as she could after watching him leave for… whatever it was that he did during the day. She was gonna call the cops on him (not that they were likely to actually do that much in Gotham) and then crash over at her friend’s place until her first chance to transfer colleges to somewhere else.

Then, turning to survey the apartment one last time, a thought struck her. A bit of blood stains and wreckage to make it look like she was kidnapped would hopefully prevent him from realizing she was onto him and coming after her for revenge. Plus, getting to work off some of her own anger by breaking things might be therapeutic.

…And so, when Jason returned to his apartment building later that afternoon, it was to see it surrounded by cop cars. Apparently, someone had kidnapped his neighbor Jazz and ransacked her apartment. And there were no leads except that in her call, she had mentioned seeing a blood-soaked figure enter the building a previous night.

He felt dread and rage boil in his gut. He’d never even noticed anyone watching them. Could they have been after him, and attacked her as collateral? He hadn’t even asked her out yet, but he had mentioned his crush around his minions before. If that was the reason, whoever had snitched would pay.

Or even if it was just a coincidence, he’d still make those responsible regret it.

It was time for Red Hood to start hunting once again.

[clegfly]

just finished omori manga chapter 7 and i am DYING laughing. this shit isnt even bad anymore its just funny bad. oh my god

[raynewolferune]

Meta Jazz, the Arkham Intern Therapist Pt 2.1

Note: The writing bug bit me while wading through the comments and replies so you guys get more! 😁 Special thanks to @the-scarecrow-of-aus & @starlightcat04 for helping spark this continuation!

Also, so you're not confused, this part is from Kon's POV and backtracks to before the Bane incident to explain how Kon started going undercover in Arkham. Pt 2.2 has the Bane incident from Kon's POV.

~*~*~

When Kon got the call from Tim asking if he'd be willing to do a favor for him, he hadn't expected it to be an undercover assignment in the infamous Arkham Asylum itself.

"You want me to do what?" He asked staring at Tim in disbelief once he reached the Nest to debrief.

"Go undercover as a new guard in Arkham." Tim repeated with a deadpan expression looking over his shoulder at Kon from his computer chair. Holy fuck, his eyebags were bad. 

"Have you slept in the past week, Tim?" Kon asked, taking in his best friend's appearance.

Tim frowned at the question. 

"I don't see how that's relevant but yes." He answered, heartbeat unchanging. Which didn't really mean anything since it was Tim but Kon decided he'd believe him. 

For now. 

Kon sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Okay, I'll do it." He said. "Can you tell me why we need someone undercover at least?" 

Tim eyes widened, startled by the question like he was surprised Kon didn't know yet even though Tim hadn't told him yet. Okay, deep breaths, calm down, Tim clearly hasn't slept in at least two days. Kon coached himself as his temper flared up at the evidence that Tim wasn't taking care of himself again. All the Supers agreed: sometimes you just wish you could beat some sense into the Bats and make them take care of themselves like normal human beings.

"Ah. Right." Tim said, turning back to the computer and pulling up some files as he explained. "Two thing have occured within roughly fifteen days of each other that together are rather suspicious. First, Dr. Thomas Rylie, Jonathan Crane's undergraduate roommate and classmate throughout undergrad and grad school, was hired to work as one of the new in house psychiatrists at Arkham Asylum. They also got their doctorates from the same school during the same time frame and both focused on the impact fear has on the brain. Dr. Rylie's focus was on fear conditioning and Dr. Crane's focus was on fear responses." Well, that sounds suspicious. 

"Second, Gotham University lost their minds and began an undergraduate and graduate internship program partnering with Arkham Asylum." 

Kon went cold. They did what?

Pictures of the Asylum, University, and three people -presumably Scarecrow, Dr. Rylie, and a young woman- filled the computer screen now. 

"The internship program has only one applicant so far and she'd already started working at the Arkham. Her name is Jasmine Fenton and her background is...sparse, to say the least." Tim turned in his chair to face Kon.

"I'm too recognizable in Gotham and among the rogues to successfully go undercover in Arkham so I've set you up with an apartment and ID as 'Kyle Jennings.' You're scheduled to start work at Arkham as a new guard tomorrow morning."

"Okay," Kon said with a nod. "What do you need confirmed? What are the primary objectives?" He prodded Tim again since his friend's sleep deprived brain seemed to think that was enough information for debriefing. It wasn't. Definitely not. A lot was implied but it wouldn't be the first time Tim had completely different intentions than what Kon had understood from his briefing. Sleep deprived Tim frequently assumed others could read his mind or something. Sleep deprived Tim was wrong.

"We need to determine if Dr. Rylie is here working for Scarecrow as part of some new scheme. We need to determine if Jasmine Fenton is complicit. We need to know if Gotham U is also in on it. And we need to find out what exactly Scarecrow is the planning." Tim stated automatically as he ticked each one off on his fingers.

"Got it. Guess I'll head over to my new apartment then and start prepping for tomorrow." Kon said, heading towards the exit. Tim hummed in agreement waving a hand in his direction as he left. That dumbass was probably already absorbed in the next case. Kon sighed, hopefully Tim would at least pass out sometime later tonight.

~*~*~

Kon's first day at Arkham wasn't anything special. He didn't see Jasmine, Dr. Rylie, or Scarecrow. He didn't see any rogues or doctors at all. It was just a really Gotham kind of orientation. 

"This is where we keep a cache of stun grenades, long-range scope rifles, tranquilizer rounds, and rubber bullets." His new supervisor and guide through orientation, Alex Fhizer, said as he showed Kon how to access, inventory, lock, and re-conceal the cache. "Everytime you pass by a cache on patrol, you will check the inventory again and sign off on it with the date and time. If anything is different from the previous inventory entry, you will immediately radio the tower and the island will be put on lockdown." Greyish Hazel eyes peered out of a weathered face staring Kon down. "You will never neglect to inventory a cache while on patrol. You will never neglect to report an inventory discrepancy. The first time you do you will be fired immediately and you can count yourself damn lucky if that's all that happens to you." 

Fhizer was intense, man.

"Yes, Sir." Kon answered. Fhizer's hard look lasted another long moment before the older man gave a firm nod and continued showing Kon the ropes.

~*~*~

The second day was no where near as chill as the first. Hell, his brain was already starting to warp, there hadn't been anything chill about that orientation.

Kon started his second day by boarding the Arkham transport bus with the rest of the staff and early morning visitors to the island. That was where he saw Jasmine Fenton in the flesh for the first time. 

She has got to be part Amazonian, was his first thought upon seeing her. She was around 6ft tall with a thick mane of red hair tightly braided reaching all the way down to her waist. Jasmine was wearing teal stud earrings, a silver bangle type bracelet on her left wrist, a white blouse, black slacks, and black flats. She carried a small, clear purse that only held a small notepad, pen, house key, chapstick, and a thin teal wallet that presumably contained her IDs, debit cards, and a small amount of cash. Damn, she was tall.

Kon's concentration was broken by the quiet sound of metal crunching slightly beneath his fingers. He immediately loosened his grip on the hand rail, checking for damage with a wince. He breathed a soft sigh of relief when he saw the damage was almost entirely unnoticeable to the naked eye. He'd have to mind his strength more closely. Kon was too used to the farm and facilities that were all reinforced to handle casual use from people with super strength. 

Tim's notes indicated Arkham wasn't reinforced for super strength anywhere. Not even along the outer walls. The facility had opted to use suppression collars on their meta inmates instead since they were cheaper and easier to repair and replace according to the official reports. However, Tim's notes had also mentioned that Arkham had reinforced the outer walls to account for super strength at one point. They'd poured nearly every dime the facility could spare into the project for months until the Joker himself had taken it personally. The madman had absolutely obliterated the reinforced outer walls until no part of them remained standing. Given Joker had destroyed the walls without having any meta powers at all and his history of viciously attacking -damn near mauling- anyone that tried to put him in a straight jacket, Kon didn't really blame Arkham for stopping while they were ahead.

Kon looked up as the bus jolted to a stop. The other passengers filing off around him. He watched as Jasmine Fenton was met by Dr. Rylie in front of the bus as he waited to disembark. 

"Ms. Jasmine!" Dr. Rylie greeted her enthusiastically with a broad open grin and beaming eyes. He reached towards her with both arms, hands open and she reached back. Their right hands clasped as their left hands landed on the other's upper arms as the two greeted one another openly. Kon wasn't very familiar with intern-mentor relationships nor what would be considered normal or professional for them, but it looked like a rather affectionate greeting for them having been strangers two weeks ago. That was strange, wasn't it? Was Tim right to be worried about them?

"Ms. Jasmine is the first and only applicant for Dr. Rylie, Director Keener, and Dean Byle's hairbrained idea to hire more doctors for this place." One of the older guards that had been standing just behind him on the bus explained having apparently noticed Kon watching the pair.

"They just seemed rather affectionate for Gotham." Kon shrugged dismissively as he turned to look over his shoulder at his new colleague. The shorter man laughed.

"A bit, yeah." He agreed. "I think Dr. Rylie is just desperate for this program to work out." He continued as they finally managed to get off the bus. Dr. Rylie and Ms. Fenton were gone now. "Pretty much everyone's been treating her like a princess." 

"That doesn't seem fair to everyone else." Kon commented, dropping back a bit to let the older man lead the way to the guards room for morning debriefing and to get their assignments. He'd already memorized the layouts but 'Kyle Jennings' shouldn't have yet.

"Who cares about fair as long as it works?" The guard answered. "If treating her like a princess scores more interns for the program in the long run, and if one intern every year ends up interested in sticking around, I'll be happy to cater to every single one of them." He confessed, stopping in the middle of the hall to turn and face Kon directly. Kon glimpsed the name Ryans as the silver name badge flashed the briefly reflecting the overhead lights. "You non-gothamites just don't get it. We're desperate for whatever help we can get." 

"That's why I applied here." Kon lied. "Going to school across the bay, I heard a lot about what went down over here while I was in college. I want to help." 

Ryans gave a short solemn nod then turned and led the rest of the way to the break room. 

~*~*~

Day four undercover was when Kon officially met Jasmine Fenton. 

Everything had been going well so far with his undercover assignment. He'd settled in to the role of Kyle Jennings, been getting along well with his new coworkers including Ryans and Fhizer, and hadn't yet managed to screw up inventorying the caches during the outer patrol loops. That being said, Kon was having other issues.

The worst part of being an unstable Kryptonian clone was that his strength tended to fluctuate. It normally wasn't much of an issue when he was surrounded by reinforced everything in his daily life but here at Arkham it was becoming a problem. Case in point, Kon thought to himself with an exhausted groan as his freshly made coffee mug shattered in his hand.

"Oh come on." He sighed snatching a handful of paper towels from the counter and bending to wipe up the coffee and ceramic shards on the floor. At least he was the only one in the room when it shattered. The door clicked softly behind him and Kon jumped twisting to look. 

Jasmine Fenton stood behind him having just closed the door to the break room after entering.

"What happened here?" She asked, sounding bewildered with slightly wide eyes as she took in the mess on the floor. Thank God. She didn't see it.

"Guess I was a bit more tired than I thought." He said with a forced laugh in order to hide his nerves. "Slipped right through my fingers."

She nodded, accepting his words at face value. 

"I've done that more than a few times close to finals." She admitted. "You guys have 10 hour shifts, right? You must be exhausted. When's your next day off?"

"The day after tomorrow." Kon said. "This is day 3 for me since orientation doesn't count."

"You get 2 days off followed by an on-call day, right?" She asked.

"Right," Kon agreed. "AKA 2 days of freedom and a day chained to the Bowery." He joked.

"Absolutely terrible, they may as well put an ankle monitor on you." She cracked back grinning. Kon snickered. The door opened again.

"I see you found another non-gothamite here." Dr. Rylie said striding into the break room with a wide grin.

"Sounds like that makes three of us." Kon agreed. Outside of Joker, he had never seen a gothamite grin that wide in his life.

"Dr. Thomas Rylie, a pleasure to meet you." Dr. Rylie introduced himself holding out his hand to shake. Kon shook his hand as gently as possible, mindful his strength was on the fritz.

"Kyle Jennings, nice to meet you. I just started as a guard earlier this week." He said then held his hand out to shake Jasmine's.

"Jasmine Fenton, I'm an intern therapist. This is my second week here." She greeted with a warm smile shaking Kon's hand. She didn't say anything about being glad to meet him, Kon noted. It wasn't exactly strange behavior but something made him take note of it anyway. Like by not saying it she was saying she hadn't decided whether meeting him was a good or bad thing yet. Dr. Rylie didn't seem to notice anything off with the interaction though as he went about making his own coffee. The three of them made idle small talk as they made their own coffees. Once his new cup was ready, Kon bid them both goodbye and went on his way. While they were his main objective, lingering too long this early into their aquantiantship would probably be strange.

He had several other small friendly interactions with both of them over the next few days. Taking the time for greetings, small talk, and sharing small bits of casual background info from Kyle Jennings's past to encourage them both to open up to him. He also broke a clipboard, two more coffee cups, several pens, and a doorknob during that time as his strength continued to fluctuate. The doorknob had been particularly embarrassing. He had gone to open the door for Jasmine when he saw her with her arms full of files and somehow managed to twist it in such a way that the screws holding it in place sheered off and the knob came off in his hand. Collins, his partner for building patrol that day, burst out laughing hysterically as Kon stared at the doorknob in horror.

"No worries, man." Collins said, clapping Kon on the shoulder still snickering. "Someone else probably broke it and put it back so they wouldn't get scolded or something."

"Yeah," Kon said with a nervous laugh. "That must be what happened."

Jasmine's eyes flicked between the two of them then she grinned.

"And here I thought you just really hated that door." She teased Kon. He felt his face heat up as Collins laughed at him again.

"It is an ugly door." Collins agreed enthusiastically smirking.

"Terribly ugly. Hideous even," Jasmine said with a smile.

"Possibly even traumatizing to behold," Collins continued to smirk.

"You've got me. I have a deep rooted traumatic fear of metal taupe doors." Kon deadpanned ears burning. Jasmine snickered as Kon got the door open for her and they went their separate ways.

~*~*~

"What have you found so far?" Tim asked. Kon did not have the words to express how much he didn't want to be at the Nest at 3am on his first day off from undercover work. If it was anyone other than Tim he wouldn't have even answered the phone.

"Literally nothing," Kon said dryly. "I am still the newest of newbies at Arkham. I practically spent the whole week being babysat by senior guardsmen." He sighed, reminding himself that it wasn't Tim's fault that he was a little insomniac goblin and that Kon really did love his friend and would be sad if he hurt Tim's feelings. Eventually. When he woke up again in the morning. "I did start befriending them both though. It's slow going since we're in different areas but nearly being the only non-gothamites there seems to be helping me make some headway at least." 

There was one other non-gothamite on staff, a medical nurse named Sharon Earley. She was in her mid-thirties and the most sour and unpleasant person Kon had had the displeasure of meeting so far on Arkham's staff. Not that Kon could blame her for that. Not when she had several large ragged scars spanning from her chin and down both of her arms from when Zsazz had gotten hold of her alone after dark her second year at Arkham. It was a damn miracle she'd survived him. Kon didn't know how she managed it but he wouldn't try to find out either. Ryans had taken him aside right before he first met Nurse Earley and warned him not to stare or ask about any of it and then explained the bare basics of what happened to her after they'd left. 

Tim probably had a file with every detail of that night as well as information about Sharon Earley's life both before and after that night somewhere on his computer. The thought made Kon nauseous. 

"Good, good," Tim said absently as he updated the mission file on his computer. The keys clicked so rapidly that Kon again reconsidered whether or not his best friend had super speed. "Better to keep them from suspecting than to rush in anyway." 

"Exactly." 

Tim continued asking questions about every little detail he could think of concerning Dr. Rylie, Jasmine Fenton, and the rogues currently in Arkham.

"They don't let me near those guys yet. I'm too new." Kon said when Tim asked if Scarecrow looked to be plotting more than usual.

"They don't?" Tim sounded surprised, going so far as to stop typing so he could turn and stare at Kon. The clone was amused to note something about his statement had managed to wake Tim up enough to be visibly shocked instead blank-faced with exhaustion.

"Of course not," Kon answered trying to keep the amusement from his voice as much as possible. "As many times as your rogues have broken out they're leary of letting new hires near them in case they're goons in disguise." 

Tim sank back into his chair looking like Kon had uprooted his whole world by proving the Earth really was flat via actual science.

"That's impossible." Tim said sounding faint. "Everytime there's a mass breakout, we always hear that some of the guards helped them escape. How?..." He trailed off, eyes darting rapidly like he was tracking lines of an invisible conspiracy board in the air in front of him. Kon shrugged, uncomfortable with this new information.

"Scuttlebutt is that the people helping them escape are visitors. The guards get blamed because the goons visit wearing clothes similar to the guard uniform from a distance. All blue polo shirts and black pants look similar at a distance." Kon explained. "It also doesn't help that the guards can't really do much to stop the escape attempts since they only have stun grenades, tranquilizer darts, batons, low voltage tazers, and rubber bullets to fight back with. So as long as enough people are involved in the escape attempt at least some of them will make it out even if the guards manage to to tranquilize several of them." 

Tim still looked like Kon was blowing his mind. It was such a rare experience that Kon had to continue.

"Plus the tranquilizer darts and the rubber bullets have to be fired from different hardware." Kon told him. "Which sucks because you have to carry twice the amount of weight while chasing after the escapees which slows you down and it takes longer to swap between them."

There was something similar to mystified horror spreading across his friend's face now.

"Speaking if swapping between them, they have different ranges too." Kon continued gleefully. Half because it was fun wrecking Tim's worldview and half to actually impart the information. "Batons are short-range. Tranquilializer darts and stun grenades are mid-range. Rubber bullet riffles are long-range."

"If that's all it is, WE can fund then better gear to control the inmates." Tim interrupted turning back to the computer and swiftly typing out a list of things to send Arkham. Kon shook his head.

"That won't work." He disagreed gently. "They aren't failing because of the gear itself."

Tim turned back around to face him, confused. This was not going to be a fun conversation, Kon swallowed hard and forced himself to continue.

"The problem is that if you fire the rubber bullet riffles from mid or short range you could seriously injury or even kill the patient. If they get past mid-range, you'll miss them completely using tranquilizer darts or stun grenades. If you try to use either of those at short-range it'll be bad for you whether it's because they'll get hold of you before the tranquilizer knocks them out or because you'll stun yourself too."

Comprehension and trepidation began to dawn on Tim's face. He deflated in his chair, sinking lower and lower as he stared off into nowhere.

"You also can't hit them with more than one tranquilizer dart in a four hour window because you could accidently kill them that way. That also means even though you have a baton, you typically can't do enough damage to them to keept them from escaping because that might potentially kill them." Kon said completely solemn now as he relayed the information. "Because regardless of the reputation Arkham has or what the patients have done, it is still a hospital and they are still patients." 

Tim was staring directly at Kon now. Mouth open, face slack, eyes wide with a kind of numbed shock. Kon held his gaze.

"Yeah," Kon said after a moment. "Yeah, that's how I reacted too." He looked down, picking at his nails for a moment before forcing himself to stop and meet Tim's gaze again. "Phizer, my new 'boss', made sure to drill that into my head during orientation. 'Arkham's guards exist first and foremost to protect the patients. Arkham isn't supposed to be a prison. It's a medical facility. The patients are confined to the premises because their affliction has made them dangerous and they have to stay so that we can keep them and others safe from further harm. We are here to keep the patients and staff from hurting each other, themselves, or being hurt by people outside of Arkham's walls.' Not gonna lie, man." Kon said quirking a bitter grin as his did. "Hearing that kind of fucked me up a bit."

Tim sucked in a huge heaving breath then slowly let it out before he responded.

"I can't say I ever thought about it like that." He admitted in a soft strained voice. "Can't say I ever wanted to either." There was a bitter tinge to his words.

"Yeah, neither did I." Kon answered, shoulders slumping a bit. "Was there anything else you wanted to ask me? I kind of want to head back and sleep a bit."

Tim shook his head slowly.

"No, I think we're good at the moment." He said looking twice as exhausted and drained now as he did when Kon first got there. Kon nodded.

"Good night then. I'll see you later, man." He said, pushing off the wall he'd been leaning against and heading for the door.

"Be safe, Kon." Tim answered softly turning back to his computer.

[jorvik-chronicles]

🔮 ⤷ Random and Unimportant Soul Rider Headcanons [Pt.1]

These are all mostly based on my own OC-ified versions of the Soul Riders, but I thought it would be fun to share nonetheless >:)

Linda collects plushies. Her bed is absolutely full of them, all different sizes, colours, styles, etc - as well as a lot from different fandoms she's in. For those that already came with names, she reassigned them names, and probably writes them all down in a designated notebook with cool little stickers and doodles of them.

Lisa is THE plant mom. They all buy her plants for her birthday, and they are like her children. Sometimes she’ll come home from long trips and find that some of them have wilted, and it’s the most heartbreaking moment for her as she tries desperately to revive them.

Anne will often get someone's attention by calling them by their last name only. ("PETERSON! What the HELL are you doing??")

In Linda's backpack, she has pretty much anything she could ever need. 4a. One of the things she carries is a small pocket notebook, where she writes snippets of poetry from random thoughts she has throughout the day, which she will inevitably look back on hours later (having forgotten what she'd wrote) and sit there thinking “Damn, that’s really shit why did I think that was cool and aesthetic”.

Alex has her friends saved in her contacts under the silliest of names. Linda as 'Sister of the Cheese', for example, or Anne as 'Sunshine [derogatory]'.

Lisa wears odd-coloured shoe laces. The most notable are her Converse, which are also covered in colourful patches, doodles, and embroidery that the whole group has contributed to.

Anne and Alex engage in aggressively cheesy, jokey flirting with each other, despite their relationship being purely platonic. This is probably down to the fact that they have the dirtiest minds. Sometimes they’ll just greet each other like: “Hey, sweetcheeks.” “Hey, sexy.”

Anne just has really cold hands?? Like, all the time??

Wall-hangings and tapestries are a big trade-off between Linda, Lisa and Anne.

There was definitely a moment where they all found out that Alex can rap really well. Eminem better watch out fr.

Linda collects scarves ready for the Autumn and Winter. Like, imagine her just browsing lil shops in Jarlaheim and she comes across a scarf she really likes, is just like UUUUEEE >:)) She is the Pinterest girly.

Lisa can't swim, but would really like to learn how. Until then, she is the designated rubber-ring dweller.

Alex cracks her knuckles. All. The. Damn. Time.

Anne absolutely loves card and dice games, and will challenge the others to a game or two if they have the stuff available. She probably carries around a pack of cards with her.

Alex is a WhatsApp sticker FIEND. She has a bank full of meme stickers to send in response to anything.