#possible asexual

[anarchist-aquarius]

❗❗❗✨✨✨LIFEHACK!!!!!!✨✨✨❗❗❗

no one can embarrass me if i embarrass myself first <3

-me, every day of my life

[spook-babyyy]

Being in a relationship that's slowly dying because you don't need/want sex, just their love and comfort, but they're only willing to give those things to you if you have sex with them is definitely spirit crushing.

[mossy-aro]

sorry but i am SO deeply tired of the 'aphobia isnt real' arguments because they are literally always being conducted in such bad faith. NO there is not specific societal or legal discrimation against aces and aros BECAUSE we are asexual and or aromantic. you cannot hold specifically bigoted beliefs towards a group you do not even know exist. there ARE, however, underlying and deeply pervasive systems and beliefs that actively erase, dehumanise and make life tangibly more difficult for aro and ace people on a social, economic and legal basis. most of this is due to hyperinvisibility, the medicalisation of any nonnormative + misunderstood orientations, the elevation of romance + romantic structures as the most important aspects of interpersonal relationships in society, as well as the nuclear atomisation of the family. among other things. like. amatonormativity has never been ABOUT aromantic people specfically oh my GOD. its simply the underlying social belief that everyone is expected to be in monogamous romantic relationships and that those relationships are expected to the default centre of one's life. its something that affects EVERYONE! but within that it affects aromantic people in a specific and heightened way because of our inability to participate in it in a societally acceptable way. like these are not 'aromantic' or 'asexual' or 'polyamorous' issues specifically. these are theories and terms that originated within feminist + queer sociology studies! its all part of the wider underlying social fabric! aspec people are simply pointing out that we are often affected by these things in unique and often unseen ways.

the idea that we believe people actively 'hate' us for being asexual or aromantic is completely ridiculous. most people i know do not even know the definition of those words! so how could they hate me for it. they could however, for example, hold the pervasive + societally unchallenged belief that not experiencing sexual or romantic attraction is a medical issue or something concerningly abnormal in a human being + something i should get fixed. and its not uncommon that when you DO explain that its simply your orientation to them, they continue to medicalise it and see it as some sort of issue. genuinely so deeply tired of having to explain this to people time and time again when they only want to cherry pick the most ridiculous arguments to respond to and then act as if that's a majority held opinion in the aspec community. like i actually think we are aware of how society views us we're not fucking deluded and stupid. we don't have victim complexes we are just pointing out facts that yall are so desperate to ignore. UGHHHHH

[heartless-aro]

People when a character is aromantic or aromantic coded: Wowie! They’re aroACE! Because they aren’t interested in romance! Look at how aroace they are!

People when a character is aroace or aroace coded: Isn’t it cool that this character is asexual? Asexual icon! They’re such great asexual representation :)

[aspiringwarriorlibrarian]

"You can't make your disabled characters ace that's infantilization" ASEXUAL PEOPLE ARE NOT INFANTS.

God the list of people you can make asexual seems to be shrinking by the day because way too many people still see making a character ace or aro as diminishing them. Making a character ace is not the same thing as infantilizing or desexualizing them and if you can't tell the difference that's not on me.

[chimerafeathers]

i appreciate so much that Siffrin doesn’t respond to Isabeau’s confession with immediate reciprocation, and instead has the self-awareness in that moment to ask for time to sort out how they actually feel

there ARE feelings there. but after everything, how much of them are really, truly Siffrin’s alone, and how much of them are Isabeau’s stagnant almost-confession, frozen and reflected back in on itself like mirrors facing each other—Isabeau, stuck reaching out but never touching, Siffrin, stuck aching for connection but never asking for it? they wanted something, in that moment. but removed from the reaching, do they really want this? does he want Isabeau, in that way, specifically, or was he only responding to the call in front of him out of desperation to be loved and to love back, in the way they thought that call needed to be answered?

he needs time outside of that situation to know for sure. to have a world and options outside those handful of repeating interactions, with both of them knowing the potential is there, but also access to the choice of acknowledging that potential and letting it go.

maybe they do! maybe they don’t! maybe they end up somewhere in between or outside of either of their expectations. maybe they get together and break up. who knows.

the point is, he has the chance to figure it out.

[that-nerd-who-writes-fanfiction]

I’m back on my demi/ace Arthur shit so here’s some things that have been floating around in my head for a few days

Arthur only ever wore shirts to bed while he was under love spells and after he got married.

He’s a hopeless romantic but actively avoids anyone who’s interested in him because, y’know, expectations suck.

He walked around shirtless or pantsless or completely naked while bathing or just while he was in his chambers multiple times when it was only him and Merlin, or whenever there was no expectation for it to mean anything else.

He only started liking Gwen when he got to know her more and when she started acting like a person more than a servant around him. The Ealdor episode springs to mind, then that episode where he faked his identity in a tournament. I’m sure there’s others, but I can’t remember them right now.

Anytime he acts sexually, flirting or anything along those lines, with anyone he’s not familiar with it’s always performative. When he met Merlin the whole time he was watched by the never seen again noble sons he was hanging out with. (I’ll speculate who they were again another day, that’s not the point)

He’s got no issues with proximity, clearly with how he acts around the knights with their affection, but as soon as the context changes he gets flustered and awkward.

Anyway. Do whatever you want with that information.

[queerclarkkent]

Watson Looking at Holmes like he is the whole world tm moodboard

Images: Watson looking at Holmes smoking, from afar

Watson looking at Holmes smoking, from up close

Watson watching Holmes think

(A three pipe problem)

Watson tending to Holmes' minor head injuries

Text: say that again? I'm sorry. I got distracted by your little manerisms, how you pronounce certain words, and the way your eyes light up when you talk about something you're passionate about, and started my day dreaming about spending my life making you laugh, and feel loved and cherished

They are beautiful, and gay, and I will hear nothing against on it

[mxelliott]

i think it’s really funny how ppl are always either “you be happier in a relationship” or “you won’t be happy taken if you’re unhappy single” or whatever

as an aroace person i can never understand how people don’t understand that the base of just about any long-lasting relationship is friendship?? maybe i wont be happy “taken”/in a romantic relationship however i would fucking die for my best friends because i love them.

fuck everyone who thinks the end goal of all life is to fuck or be romantic bc you can only do one of those things without becoming friend-ish, and it’s not fucking.

[pumpkinrootbeer]

"how can he be ace when he acts like that 🤣😂" Im so sorry to be the first person to tell you this but... Asexual people. can have personalities.

[snakebites-and-ink]

If whumper bad why hot

[who28828292]

my friend and i have plans to get married if we’ve got nothing going for us by a certain age and tbh i laugh at the thought once a week

because this is us

(friends is bisexual aromantic and i am asexual biromantic)

[briefobservationdreamer]

I absolutely love how the official Valentine's merch for Alastor represents his asexuality (and aromanticism) for people who aren't interested in relationships. Instead of being explicitly sexual and/or romantic like the others, which would have been so easy to do, the closest he gets to showing skin is removing his bowtie, and the taglines are about platonic friendship and self-love, and all completely in character for him as well. As an aroace who isn't interested in relationships, I really appreciate that.

[bloggingboutburgers]

It feels like you're being kind of self infantilizing when you draw yourself all small and cute and then talk about how you don't kiss your partner with tongue. I don't know. It just feels weird and almosy creepy. We're not children. Why do we have to act like such children when it comes to intimacy and how we represent ourselves?

Well, that definitely isn't the goal. I always draw all of my characters on the small side, and it's kinda accidental but I ended up drawing myself short because my partner is on the short side, and it just turned out to be a body type that I associate with nice things, so it just... Happened when I was looking for a character to draw myself as. Didn't even hit me it was out of me liking how my partner looks and that I basically "stole" their looks til like... Months later somehow. I'm lucky it doesn't upset them 🙈

Also uh... Sorry I don't wanna stick my tongue in someone's mouth and that it took me a while to be comfortable with kissing on the mouth at all? ...Nah, wait, actually I'm not sorry, that's just who I am and that's my experience, just like other aces are down to tongue-kiss. Everyone has different experiences and everyone's deserves to be seen and heard for what it is, not what it should represent. And each of them are valid, needless to say.

Lastly, I'm pretty freaking open when it comes to me being over 30. I have "very old" in my bio because it feels like that's how that age range is perceived online, and I've drawn several comics about how I don't like to be infantilized, and how it's important that I'm open about my age because it shows orientation isn't a "phase". So... Yeah. Obviously. We're not children. But I of all people don't need to be told that, thanks.

[askfordoodles]

felt so euphoric to be able to come out as nb/trans in Veilguard, loved the added dialogue they took the time to write and record just for such scenarios

now can we PLEASE make a game where u can explicitly, verbally come out as ace, and also without it automatically locking you out of the romance path

pls bioware (and other companies) some of us are STARVING

[lenny-zesty]

will never ever get/understand aphobes. bro wdym ur mad at me bc I don’t want bitches. i’m just over here in my no bitch zone and ur killing my vibe