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when-jaguars-are-sick · 1 month ago

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GENERAL: Conversations and Perspectives

This is what I'm considering Part 2 of When 'Miss Independent' Can't be Independent

It's much less explicit in sickfic-iness than I like to post, but I'm starting some plots!

These two fics are basically the set up for every long term plot that I have planned right now, so kind of a must-read if you want to follow the plot

Welcome to some general angst, anxiety, and caretaking!

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COLIN:

“It’s just so frustrating,” Colin complains, sitting next to a curled-up Julie on the couch. Roywn pauses on his way past the living room, and asks, “What’s frustrating?”

Colin sighs, explaining, “I’m just so tired of everyone thinking me and Jules are dating. Like, is it that unusual for a male and female to be friends?!”

Rowyn frowns, crossing his arms, “People said that?”

“Yeah, I must’ve had three people today calling her my girlfriend.”

Julie chuckles quietly, and he’s glad that she finds it amusing at least. Probably because the idea of them dating is just so absurd. He’s gay, she’s lesbian, it’s not even possible. But still, that’s the assumption, and it drives him crazy sometimes.

Rowyn, however, does not seem to find it amusing, his frown more like a glare now as his mouth turns down more.

Julie nudges Colin with her foot, and he glances at her to find her smirking at him, “If I was straight, I’d date you.”

“You’d try,” he jokes, “Sorry Julie, I’ve only got eyes for Ro,” he laughs, glancing at his boyfriend, only for him to scoff, and leave the room. Colin frowns after him, not sure what’s wrong.

“He really doesn’t like me, does he?” Julie asks, still sounding amused.

“Eh, I don’t know. People tend to grow on him, but I can’t understand why he wouldn’t like you. If anyone would appreciate your honesty, it would be him.”

Julie just shrugs, leaning back against the cushions. Colin falls silent too, thinking about Rowyn’s odd grudge against Julie, but ultimately decides that if Rowyn has a problem, he’ll share it.

He looks then at Julie, carefully observing her. He’s relieved to see she has more colour in her cheeks, and she looks less feverish than before. She’s been able to drink water without throwing up, so he’s pretty confident in saying she’s on the mend.

------

CHARLIE:

“Colin?” says Charlie shakily, holding onto the doorframe and still feeling unsteady. He glances over at her, then jumps to his feet, and hurries over.

“Charlie? Hey, what’s going on?” he says soothingly, taking her elbow and leading her to the kitchen table. She slumps into a chair, and then leans on the table, her head sitting heavily in the palm of her hand.

“I’m low,” she says, gesturing to the blood sugar test sitting on the table, and reading 3.8. It’s not too bad, but definitely explains the shakiness and discomfort.

“Okay, that’s okay.” Colin assesses her a little more carefully, but ultimately decides she’s aware enough not to require emergency measures. She watches him grab a juice box from the pantry and slide the straw in, before passing it to her. She sips it slowly, letting the bright flavour swirl around her tongue.

She unlocks her phone, going to her most visited app, checking her blood sugar. She groans when it doesn’t match the low reading she got. As she expected.

She shows Colin the reading from her phone, and he looks at her, confused.

“Forgot to change it today,” she explains, “Tha’s why it didn’t catch the low.”

Charlie takes another drink of her juice, as Colin goes to her cubby in the entryway.

“You have a new one in your bag, right?” he calls back, and she hums an affirmative. He returns with her cute crossbody bag that she takes with her everywhere. He rifles around until he finds the small package with a continuous glucose monitor.

He pulls out an alcohol swab, passing both to her, and she sighs before beginning the process. The juice is helping to clear her head enough that she can properly attach it, giving a small wince as the reader slides into her skin.

She’s relieved when it calibrates with her phone, and after another few minutes, the reading she gets shows a slight improvement from the sugar. Colin passes her a pouch of gummies, and she smiles. Her fingers fumble to open it, before bringing one to her mouth. With her snack, she feels the weight of the low lifting.

“Thanks,” she says to Colin, and he smiles at her gently, before saying “C’mon,” and leading her to the living room.

He sets her up on the couch, in his previous spot, meaning she’s curled up by Julie’s feet.

“There, both my patients in one spot,” he jokes, passing her the remaining gummies. When she next shows him her sugar levels, they are almost back to normal.

------

JAMIE:

“Ah, shoot, shoot, shoot!” Jamie exclaims, rushing from his room, down the hall, and to the front door.

“What’s up?” asks Colin, sounding kind of tired. (Really, he’s just hoping there isn’t another emergency tonight)

“Forgot I had plans with Keegan, he’s waiting for me. Stupid brain forgot to remind me, and I forgot to set an alarm.”

“Oh, whoops. Well, have fun!”

Jamie hurries out of the flat, shoes on his feet, bag in his hand, and jacket slung over his arm. While he’s driving, he realizes he forgot to grab a book. It’s too late to turn around now, and even so, it’s kind of ridiculous to turn around for a book that he probably won’t even read because he’s going to be talking to Keegan.

When he gets out of the car, he sees Keegan standing at the edge of the park, looking so handsome in his neat dark blue button-up. Jamie hurries towards him, apology ready, but Keegan just smiles and holds out his hand.

Jamie melts, and takes it, and they walk through the park together.

“So what book did you bring tonight?” asks Keegan eventually.

“Um, actually, I forgot one tonight. I was kind of in a hurry because I forgot about this, and ran out the door without grabbing one.” Jamie feels that little wrong-ness, that he doesn’t have a book in his bag, or his hand, and it’s just one more thing to throw tonight out of balance.

“Wow, I don’t think I’ve seen you without a book the entire time I’ve known you!” Keegan exclaims.

“Uh huh,” is Jamie’s noncommittal answer.

Keegan tugs him to a stop. “Are you okay?” he asks gently, examining Jamie’s face, but he won’t meet his eyes.

“Yeah,” Jamie sighs, “I’m sorry I forgot about our plans. I didn’t mean to make you wait.”

Keegan smiles at him softly, the hand not connected to Jamie’s reaching up to play with the collar of his sweater.

“I know you didn’t, bookworm. It’s okay, I promise I’m not upset, and I didn’t mind waiting, it’s such a lovely night.”

Jamie releases some tension, finally paying attention to his surroundings, and focusing on his boyfriend, deciding to ignore the weird parts of the night, and live in the moment.

------

KEEGAN:

Having returned from his date with Jamie, with Jamie, Keegan falls onto the couch, while Jamie hesitates for a minute before going into Keegan’s room and returning with a book. Keegan laughs, and Jamie smiles sheepishly, joining him on the couch.

Soon, Alix emerges from his art room, hair messily pulled back, and hands dotted with paint. Jayden returns home shortly after a psych lecture, and he puts his bag down at his desk, before dropping into the maroon chair. Alix immediately drops onto his lap, and they curl up together, Jayden dropping his face into Alix’s hair, as he relaxes.

Friendly conversation soon turns serious, as Keegan quietly says, “Sometimes I forget why I want to be a high school teacher.” The others turn towards him, Alix sympathetic, Jayden worried, and Jamie confused.

“What do you mean?”

“I… you should have seen my class today. I forget how awful high school culture can be.”

“What happened?” asks Jamie quietly, as Jayden and Alix exchange a glance.

“We were doing mini-presentations today, and most of them went well, but there was one group that was just so nervous, but the lack of general respect and kindness is crazy. So many kids were on their phones, or talking to each other, and as they were leaving the room, they were being so harsh. Sometimes it’s hard to imagine dealing with that every day.”

“I guess. But remember, you’re doing it for the other kids,” Jamie reminds him gently.

Keegan just plays with Jamie’s fingers, looking at his hands.

“Key,” Jayden starts, and Keegan looks up at the sound of his voice, meeting his eyes, “You’re doing it for that group, the one that was nervous but did the presentation anyway. You’re doing it for the kids like us, who needed a supportive adult and didn’t have one. You’re doing it for the kids who fall through the cracks.”

Alix interjects, “It’s because you care. And you love books, and talking about books, and connecting with students that are similarly nuts, because you’re weird that way.”

Keegan laughs a little, eyes softening and he relaxes again, reminded of what matters. It doesn’t matter if he can’t help everyone, but if he can help someone, a kid like him, or Jay, or Lex, then he’ll be doing something important, something good. He’ll be able to turn his past into a superpower.

------

ALIX:

After a little while, Jamie leaves, kissing Keegan goodbye, and heading home. Seeing Jamie just seems to soften Keegan. He becomes rounded at the edges, sweeter in his words and his mannerisms. It’s a beautiful thing, those early stages of love.

Alix always likes to see Keegan turn into a puddle when Jamie’s around. It’s so different from the sharp-edged sarcastic friend that he fell in love with many years ago. Not a bad difference, just another side to him that Jamie is able to bring out.

That’s what really reassured Alix that Jamie is the right person for Keegan. They know Jay’s not quite convinced yet, but that’s just because he needs to see the commitment and the intensity enough to accept him properly. And because he can be overprotective sometimes, but that’s just because he’s loyal. And anxious.

Alix brings one of his pieces to the living room. They don’t normally bring their artwork out of their work room, but they need a change of scenery. So he lays down a cloth on the floor, and sets up his little easel and the piece of wood he was working on, bringing a palette, and some brushes. He needs something to clear his head, and nothing does that better than attacking a piece of wood with colour.

He takes a deep breath, and slowly releases some tension from the day, and then plunges a brush into the deep blue, and harshly strokes it across the wood, watching in satisfaction as it streaks from his brush.

“What are you working on, Lex?” asks Jay, glancing over his shoulder.

“I dunno. Nothing real,” they say, frowning at the wood as they add a swoosh of vibrant fuschia, then a dot of muted pink.

“Oh, I don’t know. I think your abstract works are some of your most emotionally real pieces, love.”

Alix grins, looking back at the mess of colours on this random plank of wood he found in the alley behind their building. Maybe that’s true.

Jayden settles back into his place on the chair, with a good view of Alix’s art. He doesn’t usually see the process, just the end result.

Alix prods the wood with his brush, leaving a trail of soft blue dots, tongue poking out in concentration.

The two chat as Alix continues to add broad brushstrokes, and fine details, contrasting blues, pinks, and yellows. He highlights the wood grain in some spots, and in others uses the rougher texture to add dimension.

They finish by adding dramatic thin lines and small dots of gold and black, accenting and highlighting all at once. When he finishes, he proclaims, “This is how Key looks at Jamie.”

------

ROWYN:

“So… I guess Colin thinks I need to give you another chance.”

“Well, don’t do me any favours.”

“I’m not. I’m doing Colin a favour.”

“Fine. What do you want to know?”

Here they fall silent. Neither is sure how to make this relationship possible, though they both know for Colin’s sake they should put in a bit more effort.

Rowyn doesn’t know what to think of Julie. From what he can tell, she is cocky, judgemental, and self-righteous. But Colin says she’s confident, independent, and honest. Really, those are just synonyms, but the connotations are different.

So how does he figure it out? There’s no logic to getting to know people, there’s no clear steps, especially when the person you want to get to know doesn’t really care about society’s rules.

Then again, he stopped caring about many societal expectations years ago. Including everything his family wanted for him and thought he should be.

Anyway, back to the situation at hand. He knows her major already (they share an interest in medicine). He knows she’s known Colin longer than he has (and he might resent her for it, in the small illogical part of his brain), and that they work together, obviously.

Oh, and he knows that people often mistake them for a couple, rather than a couple of friends.

Julie finally scoffs, and says, “As far as I can tell, you don’t have any interest in knowing me, despite the fact that I know Colin better than most people.”

And maybe that’s what’s throwing Rowyn off. The fact that Julie does know Colin, can maybe read him better than Rowyn can. That’s not true, though, because Rowyn understands Colin, and what they have is deeper.

------

JULIE:

Julie’s getting really sick of all these conversations, and meeting new people. She closes her eyes to try, or at least pretend, to sleep. It doesn’t last long.

Colin swaps places with his boyfriend, raising a curious, but hopeful, eyebrow. He obviously wants them to be getting along, and Julie would try, if Rowyn would. But alas, Rowyn seems to have a grudge against her, and she’s not one for trying to please people. Well, not anymore.

“So Jules. I’ve been wondering. Why didn’t you call me? Not just this morning, but last night, when you were sick? You know I'd've come.”

“I didn’t need help, I would have been fine.”

“You’re so full of shit. You needed help,” he says firmly, “Especially when your roommate is fucking Ashley.”

“I…” she scrambles for something to say, but draws a blank. Everything seems like a flimsy excuse, there’s nothing she can say to hide the well of emotions. Some things are just too raw for words.

“I forgot you might care enough to help,” she finally whispers, sounding so unlike herself, too much like her old self.

“Oh. Shit, this is because of her? I didn’t actually think about that.”

“I guess, maybe. Good old Dani -shit, Danica- she…”

Julie closes her eyes, the intensity of Danica flooding back to her, the manipulation, the lies, the twisting her words, making her seem dramatic. She was never sick with Danica, she was just messing up plans. She couldn’t be sick, she was always making it up, making it a big deal.

“Jules,” Colin calls, her eyes snapping forward as she looks at him, “We got rid of her. You have people in your corner now.”

Julie scoffs. “We got rid of her, but she’s not gone. Ashley’s leftover from that life, and clearly she knows it. You say I’ve got ‘people’ in my corner, but I don’t. I have you. That’s one person.”

“And your family, whom you actually like.”

“Yeah, but that’s because I don’t really tell them anything real. It’s just hard to make friends, especially with everything I’m doing right now.”

“Well, look around. There’s people here. These are good people.”

“Maybe. Except Rowyn, I don’t get that man at all.”

“I wish you’d give him another chance. He’s a tough nut to crack, is all.”

When she doesn’t answer, he reminds her, “It’ll get better. I was there for you through all her shit, I’m not going anywhere now. And you can always call me, I’ll always come.”

------

JAYDEN:

Jayden sits at his desk, tapping his pen on the table. He’s supposed to be studying, but instead he’s staring blankly into space as his brain runs in circles.

He snaps out of the daze when Alix walks past, checking in with a quiet, “Hey, you good?”

Jayden sighs, scrubbing his face with his hands as if to wipe the fogginess from his brain.

Alix comes up behind him, putting his hands on his shoulders, and squeezing gently. Just enough to ground him back to reality. They press a small kiss to the top of Jayden’s head.

“Is your brain messing with you?”

“Yeah,” he sighs.

“Anything you want to talk about?”

“Not really. There’s nothing you can do about it, just replaying the day, thinking about Key, remembering.”

“I’m always happy to listen if talking would help.”

“I know,” Jayden responds, but he wouldn’t really know how to put it into words anyway. Not when his thoughts are rushing faster than he can identify them, when the emotion is more intense than the thoughts themselves.

And anyway, he wouldn’t want the following conversation.

Instead, he gently pushes Alix off, and quietly says, “I think I’m going to go to the pool for a while.”

Alix nods, “Okay. Swim hard enough that your brain forgets everything else.”

Jayden smiles, but his thoughts are still miles away.

Nothing a good swim can’t solve.

He grabs his water bottle, and his swim bag, on his way out the door when Alix tugs him back for a soft kiss.

“Love you,” they tell him, their fond voice cutting through the anxiety and reassuring Jayden that they will always be in his corner.

------

MAX:

Max isn’t sure what to think about Julie. She’s a little more intense than they’re used to, but they can tell how much Colin cares for her, so they’re pretty sure she’ll be around more often.

In the living room, they find a spot on the couch next to Charlie, and she snuggles into their side. They smile at her, and listen to Julie’s conversation with Rowyn, trying not to laugh at their obvious disconnection.

Rowyn’s convinced himself of something, Max just can’t tell what it is.

They’re trying to connect the dots that Rowyn clearly has already, when they get a text.

Leo: Hey, what are you up to? Would you like to talk for a bit?

Max smiles, and Charlie glances at their phone.

“Ooh, who’s Leo?” she asks, then pauses, “Wait, is he your coworker-friend?”

“Yeah,” Max answers, typing back an answer. They’ve only recently expanded their relationship to friends, but they’re loving their interactions. There’s a lot about Leo they didn’t know, despite working closely together for two years.

They slide from their spot on the couch, hurrying to their room, and pressing the FaceTime button, waiting for it to connect.

Leo’s smiling face and bright blue hair fills the screen, and they grin back.

“Hi!” greets Leo.

“Hi, how’s life today?”

“Euh, not too bad. Aurélie came and hung out with me for a bit after school, and we’re making headway with Rainbow’s plans for next month. I think I finally lined up our next sponsor, so that’s good.”

They talk work for a while, before the topic turns towards general life, and the drama in the flat, and inevitably, Leo’s health comes up after a while, and Max brings the conversation to a crashing halt when they offhandedly say, “I’ll let you go then, let you get some rest.”

Leo immediately frowns, the heavy pause in conversation telling that that wasn’t the right thing to say. After a moment, Leo relaxes, though his expression now carries a guarded quality, as he says, “Nope, nuh uh, I called you, don’t leave because of me.”

“Okay. Yeah, that’s fair,” answers Max softly, burning with the quiet shame of having said the wrong thing. When it seems as if Leo’s waiting for them to make the next move, they say the first thing that comes to mind, “So… When do I get to meet your siblings?”

------

LEO:

“Meet my siblings? What do you mean?”

“Well, I’ve heard all these stories about Aurélie, Oliver, and uhh… Nico? I’d love to put a face to the name,” Max explains, a tooth worrying their bottom lip as they make the request. Leo grins, ignoring the butchered pronunciation of his sibling’s names, and wariness basically forgotten after Max’s slip-up. It’s better than most of what he hears on a daily basis anyway.

He pulls himself to his feet, unsteady on his feet until he grabs his cane, slowly making his way towards Aurélie’s room. The dog raises his head worriedly from his bed, cocking his head at Leo as if to make sure he’s okay. When Leo doesn’t call him to follow, he settles back down with a sigh.

“Hey, you want to meet Max?” he calls to his sister.

“Oh, did you finally make a friend? Wait, isn’t he your coworker?”

“They,” corrects Leo, and when she just raises an eyebrow at him, he explains, “Max uses ‘they/them’ pronouns, Ray.”

“Oh, right. Well, they’re your coworker, right? That doesn’t even count,” she mutters to herself.

He rolls his eyes at her, and he can see Max smiling from his phone.

“Course it counts. I’m just glad to be talking to someone outside this family,” he playfully snaps back.

He wavers for a moment, legs threatening to fail at their job, and he leans a little more heavily on the cane in his left hand, making his way to the edge of her bed and dropping down. The cane clatters to the floor, but he’ll deal with that later.

Right now, he ignores Max’s concerned look, passing the phone to Aurélie, and introducing them from off camera.

“Ooh, I love that dress!” Max exclaims, fawning over Aurélie’s bright yellow sundress, and leaning closer to the phone as they examine her more closely. “You must have great style.”

“Yep, I got the fashion genes in this family,” she quips.

Leo gives her a gentle push from his spot, then his fingers go back to prodding at his hip, trying to push feeling back into his leg.

Ollie comes bounding into the room, yapping away, and he climbs onto the bed too, leaning over to see Max on the phone.

Leo smiles, Ollie curling up next to him, and for the next while, the room is filled with the sounds of the three most important people in his life.

------

BONUS:

The flat has settled into quiet, everyone hidden away in their rooms, quiet enough that most would be asleep. So begins the best part of the night.

Apple stretches, arching her back and yawning, showing her small pointed teeth.

She hops down from her spot on the couch, landing with a near-silent thwap on the ground. Her tail swishes as she observes her territory.

All feels normal, except for the strange woman on the couch, who reeks of illness. Apple pads forward silently, nose twitching as she examines the scene. The only logical thing for her to do, is to leap onto the couch, sniffing carefully.

Her whisker’s twitch as they accidentally touch the stranger’s face. When the woman shifts, Apple startles, bounding away again. A small flick of her tail shows her amusement at the situation.

She continues her prowl, thoroughly checking her territory. First, she has a snack, purposefully marching to her food bowl, and crunching down some familiar pellets. Hunger satisfied, she then must satisfy her curiosity.

She leaps onto the counter, where she knows she’s not supposed to go, but she always likes to be a little bit bad. She’s disappointed to find a lid on the butter, and no good midnight snacks left out for a small cat like her.

She pauses for a minute by the front door, tingling with the knowledge that something’s out of place… the shoes. There’s a new pair that matches the woman’s scent. She sniffs them once more to confirm, then continues her prowl.

Next, she finds a bag. A bag! Apple loves all bags, boxes, and drawers, so she happily sticks her head into the bag, followed by her front paws as she wiggles forward. Before she can climb all the way in, the bag overbalances, and she’s tipped out, the contents similarly scattering across the floor. She bounces back onto her feet and chases after a pencil that rolled away.

When she decides she’s bored of that game, she finishes her tour of the territory by checking on all of her humans. She follows the familiar routes through the hallway, nudging at each door she passes with her paw. The doors that creak open let her wander in, and while she could investigate their desks, play with whatever she finds, and cause general mischief, tonight she’s craving some good cuddles.

She finds the human who never sleeps, and pushes her way into his face. He murmurs to her, scratching her ears and she pushes harder into his hand until he finds just the right spot.

She doesn’t settle with him though. Instead, Apple gets her fill of pets, then promptly leaves the room, going to her human. The human male who she’s unhealthily attached to. She knows the door will be open, and she trots into his room, bounds onto his bed, and curls up between his legs, in that spot that she fits perfectly.

#my writing #general fic #julie woodstock #charlie bloom #kind of anyway #general angst and conversations #considered part 2 of “when miss independent can't be independent”#sickfic kind of #sickfic

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