#sorry to have to be the one to teach you that lesson

[i-like-loserz]

hey so. i had an idea about bottom mingi.

i have a strong sense that he has a thing for cowgirl. but imagine he wanted to try and top for the first time (in a long time) and slapping his ass playfully and teasing him cause hes trying to hype himself up or something but it doesn't work and you just end up riding him 🙈🙈

our cute pillow princess ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶

cw: explicit (18+), sub!mingi, afab!reader, adorable boyfriend vibes, tit-play, mention of hickies, he tries lol -- no actual penetration :( IM SORRY ANON THIS ONE-SHOT WENT ITS OWN WAY

note: anon. your mind. it's beautiful.

masterlist

---

before you can thread your fingers into his pretty hair and teasingly tug on it the way you know he likes, large hands take a hold of your wrists and pin them on either side of your head.

the coolness of his rings press into your warm skin, exciting your senses as he presses his body against you. sometimes you forget just how big he is. usually, he's the one laying under you, begging for your touch with a broken tone that slips easily from his pretty lips. this time, his deep voice is steady as he holds you against the mattress.

"tonight i'm gonna take control."

"oh, yeah?" you challenge.

it's amusing when mingi gets into these moods -- thinking that he can be the big bad boyfriend for the night when, in reality, he's the one melting for you from a single kiss.

maybe this idea came up because of the way you're dressed. there's something about seeing you in his shirt and nothing else that makes him believe you've grown soft.

it could be the way the hem brushes over your mid-thigh, highlighting the size difference between the two of you. or how the stretched-out collar fails to hide the hickies he (desperately) left on your skin the day before.

your wrists are now held by one hand above your head as his other drags your shirt upwards, revealing your body to the cool air of the room. you hear the faint sound of his breath hitching when he notices the lacy underwear you are wearing underneath.

"have you been wearing these all night?" he hooks a finger around the delicate waistband before letting it snap back. it fits you like a glove. his hand presses against the thickness of your thigh for a moment as he tries to control his reactions. he can't give up that easily.

"i was wondering when you'd notice..." you say slyly, arching your back to press your body against his. he immediately pushes you down, refusing to give in.

"why're you acting so needy? hm?" you recognize those words. you've said them to him plenty of times. of course, mingi can only regurgitate what's already been said to him.

you decide to humor him.

you round your eyes and stare up at him, a small pout on your lips, "i can't help it, i've been waiting for you all day."

"really?"

"mingi~ won't you touch me? " your voice is high pitched and sweet as you play the role. "give me what i need? i feel so empty without you."

his expression softens and hand shifts on your hip to lightly caress your skin. you ignore the way it makes goosebumps trail up your body. you're too enamored by the cute boba eyes of your sweet, naive boyfriend.

"you need me?" he cups your covered cunt which already throbs with want, "don't worry baby, i'll take care of you." he says confidently -- as if he's a hero saving his damsel in distress. aw, how sweet and caring~

"can i...touch you too?" you ask timidly, playing up your shy expression. mingi is a sucker to please you. and even when he tries to teach you a lesson, or "punish" you, he ends up playing right into your hand. whether he realizes it or not.

"o-okay," he quickly releases your wrists from his hold, "that better?" you hold back a smile from how adorably serious and attentive he's being.

he'd be such a good daddy... that is, if he could ever keep up with the role. but you much prefer him under you, if anything.

you immediately put your hands on him, greedily feeling over his broad shoulders and firm chest. "perfect." his body tenses as your hand moves downwards, dragging over his covered abs to feel over his hard cock. you're already salivating at the thought of his hard cock weeping for you.

he unconsciously bucks against your hand, loving how it perfectly presses against him to relieve some of that pressure. but before you can get far, he has enough self-control to pull your touch away.

"b-baby...t-this wasn't how it was supposed to go."

"how was it supposed to go then?" you tease, already settling back into your regular role.

"i'm supposed to be touching you and you're supposed to be begging me."

"then touch me, mingi," you place your arms back at your side, allowing him free rein of your body, "please~"

he takes the opportunity to push your shirt up to your chin, leaving you nearly naked underneath him as you aren't wearing a bra to cover yourself. warm hands cup over your tits, feeling the plushness of your curves before teasing your sensitive buds with the pads of his thumbs.

your body shivers and arches from his touch as he gently tweaks your hard nipples with his fingers. sparks of pleasure swiftly travel down to your core with every movement he makes.

you look at him from under your lashes, eyes dark as you let him play with your body. this whole time he's focused on your every reaction, eager to please you.

"you're so pretty..." he groans, "fuck, you make me so hard all the time."

"i know baby," you sigh, "you're such a good boy for me." you can't help but praise him when he's making you feel good.

he doesn't like that. at least, not when he's the one on top.

he gets all pouty, "babe, i'm trying to be sexy right now!"

"you are sexy, mimi~" you coo, "very sexy." you sit yourself up and mingi lets you, not even bothering to protest. you both know where this is going, especially when you have that look in your eye.

he huffs, "i told you to stop calling me that. it sounds like you're talking to a small dog or something..."

"okay, then what should i call you?"

"call me...sir."

"sir, you've been working so hard today," you praise, briefly gesturing to the sizable tent under his sweatpants as you lean closer to him, "maybe i can take care of you? just this once?"

"ok, but next time it'll be my turn." he argues as he leans back so you can straddle him, "seriously."

"of course, baby, next time." you agree.

[aly4khq]

overstimulating caleb because he was naughty ?? anyone…?

“shittt!” caleb whimpered out, hands digging into the bedsheets with a deadly grip. his eyes closed, head hung low with a few whines and moans.

“please…!” he squirmed, only to be readjusted by your hand pulling on his collar, “stay still caleb.”

“i’m trying,” caleb sputtered, trying to keep his temper stable. yet his attempts didn’t seem to work as much as he thought, caleb seeing your gaze go from his twitching cock to his face with a stare that sent shivers down his spine.

“…sorry..”

“you better be.”

the position you were in wasn’t anything common to caleb.

he was sat on the edge of the bed, hands behind him, whilst you sat on his thighs, restricting him from moving.

your hand wrapped around his twitching cock, the other hand holding his leash connected to a firm collar that was wrapped around his neck.

caleb had thought that you’d deprive him of cuddles, kisses and scratches. y’know the old stuff! maybe not let him come for a little, you’d never be too rough with him.

but after he destroyed your £2500 purse? the one that you saved up quite a lot of money for?? the one that you’ve only had for a month?

oh, you’ll teach him a lesson. or ten if needed.

overstimulating his poor, poor cock, running your hand up and down his length with a brutal pace, not even letting him relax when he finally came for the umpteenth time.

“please—i can’t no more…” caleb begged, head lowering with a few shaky moans. hands holding yours with pleading eyes.

“you can,”

“i can’t!” he whimpered.

“you can and you will,” you replied, jerking him off faster and faster as his moans increased, hands pushing at your rapidly moving palm.

“hah-ahhh! please i can’t!”

a laugh escaped your mouth before you asked him, “how many is this now?” you saw his brain work overtime before you squeezed his cock harder.

“fuck! oh my—“ caleb shook, eyes tightly shut, “e-eight? nine? maybe…i don’t know master, i’m sorry!”

he heard you tutting at him, “have you not been counting like i asked? tch, naughty dog. we’re at ten.”

“ten! yes ten! i remember…please no more!”

“should i really give you a break caleb?” you pushed him onto the bed, tying his head in front of him before grabbing a deadly weapon. “you thought it was 8…forgot 2 orgasms caleb, sigh i guess that’s two more.”

his eyes widened, “no! no no no no!! i’m sorry! no more! it’s ten! i know now!” he tried to squirm yet you were quicker than that, locking your body around his legs. placing the vibrating cock ring on him, the green colour giving caleb flashbacks to the videos you showed him of what it does to naughty pets like him.

yet his slight fear was easily sensed by you, a small part of you wanting to give into his crocodile tears. your hand went to his cheek, “only two caleb, i’ll give you a break after okay?” you promised, rubbing circles into his chest with your thumb before landing a wet kiss on his lips.

you heard him sob slightly before nodding, “o-only two..no more after that…” a laugh left you once more at his whiny tone, “okay my little pet.”

28/06/25 — i was crying so i decided to make myself feel better :)

[directdogman]

Hi I just wanted to say that you have inspired me a lot.

I have always wanted to write stories for a while now, I have big dreams and I hope to one day accomplish them.

Dsaf originally inspired my first oc, which to be fair I did just steal from dsaf (don't worry they are different now) it also inspired my Phone headed sona.

Your games, dsaf and dialtown are an inspiration for me, and I also was wondering if you have any advice for someone trying to write a massive project.

Sorry if I bothered you with this, have a nice day or night dogman

Ayyy, glad to hear my writing's inspired you!

To be frank, I mightn't be the best person to take writing advice from. I'm still a student in the grand scheme of things and any lesson I teach you would likely make you more like me as a writer, when you should always wanna aim past me! You should never settle for being as good as me when you can be so much better!

The only surefire creative advice I can give that might be useful to you now, which I know works because every successful artist I know has learned it, is to start small. However small you're thinking of right now, half it. Then half it again. Then half it AGAIN, and so on. Your first project should, if anything, just be a single scene. I know that might seem small, but trust me, that's always how it starts. When you're confident you've gotten the scene where you need it, then you work up from there, a few scenes, to a few more scenes, to a small game. It's better too if you don't just keep adding to the same game and start over each time for a reason I'll elaborate on now.

If you try to make a single project that's as large as the ones that inspired you, you will have a truly frustrating time. Aside from the fact that it's very difficult to organize a large project before you learn the skills that you'll pick up gradually as you make smaller projects, you also improve a lot as you start out. It's very common, especially at the very beginning of your journey, to constantly revise and remake your work as you go because every now and then, you'll improve so much that everything at the beginning is noticeably worse than what comes after.

This happens to all developers, to be clear, even ones with years of experience under their belts. It's the reason Fez took years to get out, by the developer's own admission. If your project takes a few days or even a week to make, you only have a small length of time to get better and want to scrap everything. Getting something, anything out there, getting feedback, being able to reflect on a finished product is an essential part of your creative journey and I know many developers who are more talented than me who've never gotten that far due to their tendency to set targets for themselves that they can't hit yet.

This lesson took me a much longer time for me to learn than I'd like to admit. I have about 4 long-term projects that never saw the light of day that I worked on for most of my teenage years (which I could make now), but couldn't then. If I'd made smaller projects during that time and honed specific skills, I'd likely be even better than I am now!

You'll get there if you stick with it. Learning any creative skill from scratch is an incredibly frustrating and at times, completely disheartening process. You'd be surprised how many times I almost quit doing this. But, nothing good's ever truly easy. Start tiny, work your way up! Through self reflection, feedback, added experience, you'll figure out your own style, your own workflow. And then... I am TOAST. Best of luck!

[imagination-mess]

A Second Chance at Life (Touya Todoroki X Fem!Reader) Chapter 10

Summary: For the past five years, you’ve been raising your son as a single mother. You’ve successfully avoided questions about his father by claiming that he died during the Paranormal Liberation War. From what you believe, this isn’t a lie. The last time you saw him was when he personally escorted you to U.A.’s shelter amidst the chaos in the streets.

Unbeknownst to you, he has been alive all this time, clinging to life in a facility working to keep him alive. His father, Enji, has been desperately searching for someone willing to heal him. After his presumed death, a single photo of you and Dabi began circulating through the underground, hinting at the nature of your relationship. To protect yourself and your child, you had to pay someone to stop the pictures from spreading further.

The photo provided answers to a long-standing question: who was the healer Dabi had been protecting? It identified you as the healer who had been deemed untouchable, but it also brought unwanted attention.

A/N: Sorry for any grammar or spelling errors in advance.

Word Count: 2.5K+ Masterlist of ASCAF Previously Chapter Nine To clarify the timeline, Touya and Remedy knew each other for about 2 years and almost 3 (it's half of the year), but they actually started being friends after 1 year. They have been friends for almost 2 years.

11 Years Ago No matter the amount of times you have dragged him into this particular forest, he can't get over how peaceful it is. The birds chirp and sometimes catch some wild animals, but nothing dangerous that would result in the two of you having to run out of there.

There was some music softly playing in the background as the two of you were lying on the ground with dirt and leaves sticking onto your clothes and skin.

"Why do you want your hero license so bad? Anyway, you’re planning on being a doctor, not a hero," Touya asks, breaking the silence, trying to catch his breath.

His muscles and lungs are burning from the physical exercises…

He should have listened to you when you suggested he actually train more in stamina than his quirk. He does it occasionally. It doesn't change the fact that he’s making himself into a long-distance fighter, but he’s going to lose in hand-to-hand combat eventually.

He knows you’re right, because he can barely keep up with you and he knows you aren’t doing your best either, which pisses him off. He can handle defeat, but he knows who you are. You aren't going to use him as your personal punching bag. There is a clear difference between you and him. You’ve been putting in the work ever since he started teaching you how to throw a punch. Lessons slowly evolved into showing you how to fight dirty and other tactics.

Unlike him, who’s been slacking on his physical training and relying more on his quirk, you’ve stuck with it. You took everything he taught you and kept pushing. He didn’t expect you to surpass him so quickly.

Whatever they’re teaching you at Shiketsu High School is definitely working, because he can barely keep up with your punches now. The dynamic has completely flipped compared to when you could barely block his attacks. Maybe, it could be those advanced self-defense classes your mom enrolled you in. 

"If something happens, at least I’ll be able to use my quirk without getting arrested. You know how my quirk works. It makes me an easy target. And now that my school’s joining the U.A. Sports Festival? They televise everything. Mine never did.," you say, lying beside him, eyes tracing the clouds above. Your voice is neutral when compared to your classmates, who’ve been loud about their excitement  back at the shelter. The same ones who volunteer to work at the shelter to get their hours. 

At least you understand the risk that comes with showing the world what you're capable of. It could go either way. Be something good, or something dangerous. Touya knows there are plenty of criminals out there watching, waiting for someone to slip through the cracks of hero society. It's a manipulation tactic, plain and simple.

He isn't blind to the slight shift in your composure; you fall quiet when the topic comes up. You’re not excited at all.

He knows you’d rather stay on the sidelines than have the full attention of people on you, especially in the public eye. Some teachers have been on your case, trying to motivate you to put in a little more effort and actually push your limits. You only do the bare minimum in school, but when you’re outside, you actually try.

"They’re already trying to recruit me into the hero industry full-time, which I’m not interested in," When you complained to him when the two of you were heading to the movies. 

He can already picture that one particular teacher, the one who’s convinced you could make it into the top 10 in the festival, thinking that’s all you need to do because you do just enough to land a decent internship. Meanwhile, you purposely slack off during the final rounds. You already made history in your pre-med program, being the first person to ever break into the top 30 in your school's version of the sports festival.

He knows there’s more going on than you’re letting on, but he doesn’t push it. He respects your space, just like you never asked about his past.

He doesn’t buy the reason why you failed your hero license, either, especially after hearing from other friends in the same program. You should’ve passed, because you were with them. They all passed, since you were all on the same team. You didn’t even seem upset about it, almost like you were expecting it.

"Smart," Touya says, glancing at you before turning his gaze back to the clouds. He breaks the silence with a smirk. "Who knew there was a brain under that pretty face?"

You nudge his side slightly with your elbow, a quiet warning. 

Touya lets out playful huff when he glances over to you for you already have a small smile on your face at his attempt on trying to change the conversation. 

He stays quiet for a few seconds, and has a more serious tone. "You know, you have to be a real idiot thinking that staying out of the spotlight and hiding in plain sight long enough. It will make people forget about your existence. It won't. Whatever is scaring you, and making you restrain yourself. it's not worth it." "You are sounding like my mother." You muttered softly but enough for him to hear it. 

"People who like you kind-hearted and selfless are always taken advantage of. I know you can bite for others, and I have seen it but you need to learn to bite for yourself. The world doesn't play nice." You just hummed, acknowledging what he said without adding anything more. But he knows you're thinking about it. It’s subtle, but he catches the way you tug your sleeves down. A quiet habit you have when something’s made you anxious.

“Wanna get a pastry? My treat.” Touya pushes himself up, dusting dirt off his pants.

You give him a skeptical look. “With what money?”

“That old hag asked me to be her delivery boy,” he mutters, then adds, “It’s legal money. Not counterfeit.”

He’s not entirely honest about the delivery boy part. If the old woman ever found out he spilled anything about the real nature of her shady pastry shop in the worst part of the city, she’d probably cut out his tongue.

Still, she pays him well enough to afford a modest place of his own and not rely on the shelter anymore. And for whatever reason, she adores you and treats you like her own child. It’s almost creepy, honestly. Touya’s used to the cold, monotone, foul-mouthed version of her. The one who threatens to throw knives at anyone who so much as breathes wrong. She’s not afraid to use violence, and everyone knows it. But with you? She’s all sweet smiles,and most disturbingly, respectful. She even teases you playfully, like she hasn’t cursed out half the block just that morning. It’s not about the money that you would casually buy out her entire stock just to bring it back to the shelter for everyone to enjoy, all while supporting her “small business.” Supposedly, your mother used to bring you here when you were little. It just stuck, becoming your favorite pastry shop over the years. She is the reason why you have such standards when it comes to pastries. 

The pastry shop might be a front, but that doesn’t change the fact that the old lady can seriously bake. “I told you,” you say, completely unfazed, “she isn’t as scary as she looks. She’s harmless.”

Touya looks down at you with the flattest expression imaginable, hands shoved into his pockets.

“Harmless as a wolverine.” __________________________________________ Weeks later….. Touya was halfway through a dessert the older lady guilt-tripped him into trying after he dropped off a few deliveries for her. His phone buzzed on the table next to him.

Without looking, he picked it up and pinched it between his shoulder and ear, taking another bite as the voice on the other end asked, “Hello? Is this Drakon?” Touya froze mid-bite, and pulled the phone away and checked the screen no contact. A completely unknown number. Not many people called him that nickname. Only two people had his number: you and the shelter’s security guard, Fuji. "Who the fuck is this? How did you get this number?" "I stole it from Remedy's phone. What did you do to her?" Ah. That annoying voice. He didn’t even need to guess. Purple hair girl who always has her nose in everyone’s business. That fake sweetness and judgment behind every word. He resisted the urge to sigh or hang up. “Gonna need you to be more specific,” he said dryly. “I’m not her keeper. She doesn’t report her every move to me.” “She’s been acting strange. Obsessive. She’s been diving into everyone’s quirks like she’s preparing for a damn thesis. Color-coded, notes pinned up, notebooks filled with information. It’s weird.” The girl’s tone shifted from concern to accusation. “She’s even spending time with that creepy childhood friend of hers who’s also quirk-obsessed. Our homeroom teacher is thrilled. She’s actually putting in effort.” Touya snorted. “And this has to do with me?”

“She wasn’t like this before she got close to you.”

“She’s always been like that. You just didn’t notice ‘cause she used to hide it better,” he said flatly, finishing the dessert and crumpling the napkin. “It's not my fault you weren’t paying attention.”

“You’re a bad influence.”

He rolled his eyes. “Right. Because you’re such a shining example.”

“She’s supposed to be kind and..not whatever this is..”

Touya let the silence stretch before he spoke, voice low and disinterested. “You mean she used to let people walk all over her. Let you walk all over her.”

“She chooses to turn a blind eye to avoid conflict. She doesn’t want to hurt people.”

“She chooses to stay quiet. Doesn’t mean she’s weak. She’s just... polite. Selective. Don’t confuse that for submission.” He tilted his head. “And maybe she’s not spending time with you because she finally figured out how fake your friendship was.”

The girl went silent. Touya didn't stop.

Touya continued, sharper now. “You broke into her phone. That says a lot more about you than it ever will about me.”

He waited half a second longer before twisting the knife.

“I have no record prior. But you? You planned this. Waited for her to be distracted. Snooped through her stuff like a damn creep. And why? Because you need her. You need her to look at you like you’re important. Without that... what are you?” Touya let out a low, bitter laugh, clearly amused. “Maybe she finally dropped your ass, and now you’re spiraling because you need her to feel relevant but she doesn’t need you.” “You know,” the girl snapped, “you’ve always been that stray, feral dog she felt sorry for.”

Touya stayed silent for a few seconds, before erupting into loud, frantic barking like a madman with a screw loose. The sound was wild, almost primal. Then, he broke into laughter, but it wasn’t a typical laugh. It was guttural, unhinged, and downright feral.

"Oh, that was cute," he purred, voice dripping with mockery. "Did I hurt your little feelings? Was that supposed to sting? Because that was the most god-awful, pathetic comeback I’ve ever heard in my life." He scoffed. "Try something original next time."

“Lose my number, stalker.”

He hung up, blocking the number, and tossed the phone onto the table, snorting. “Pathetic,” he muttered under his breath.

Suddenly, the sound of a metal tray clattering against the table snapped him out of his self-satisfied haze. He turned to see the older lady, freshly baked goods in hand, staring at him as though he’d lost his mind.

“You did not just bark like a dog to prove a point,” she said, eyes wide in disbelief. Bonus Scene: 

Touya was on his way to the graduation party celebrating your victory in the sports festival. It was being held at your apartment with just a few close friends. Nothing big, according to you. You had clearly told him that he didn’t need to bring a gift. Just his presence was enough for you.

He didn’t know why, but his legs wandered into the arcade you two often hung out at. He remembered how you had a mischievous smile on your face and pointed at the dragon plushie inside the claw machine. “It’s you.”

“Huh?” Touya raised an eyebrow and glanced at the plushie again.

“You know the black hair, fire quirk, and the only nickname that you don't seem disgusted by, Drakon.”

“I guess…”

The next moment, you walked up to that particular claw machine and spent a few bucks trying to get it before giving up. You almost had it a few times, but eventually called it quits.

You looked sad, though you didn’t want to spend more money. “I’ll get it later. Maybe I can convince one of the workers to give it to me.”

Yet, you religiously tried the claw machine every time you went to the arcade with him. Even he gave it a shot once. For only the machine to mock him by letting the claw grip the plushie before dropping it at the last second.

This is stupid.

Touya thought to himself as he glanced around, keeping watch before picking the lock on the claw machine. With a click, the glass opened, and he grabbed the last remaining black dragon plushie.

He walked out of the arcade, holding the plushie without a care, staring at it most of the way to your apartment. He still didn’t understand the appeal. Why did you want it so badly?

It was an ugly plushie. It even had a crooked smile and lopsided eyes. So why did his chest and throat feel weird when he saw your eyes light up at the sight of it? When you looked up at him with a smile? You looked ridiculous with that paper glitter crown on your head, most likely made by the artistic one.

“You remembered!”

“How could I not, when you’ve been so persistent every time we go to the arcade?” Touya said, holding the dragon by its head.

He let it drop into your hands when he realized what you were about to do. “You still suck at claw machines.”

“Yeah, yeah.” You smiled softly, your hands gently caressing the plushie.

Touya glanced up when he felt the stares and of course, your little friends were lined up at the corner of the wall like a bunch of nosy children.

They were grinning, whispering, giggling. Heads stacked like a wobbly totem pole until they realized he was staring right back.

They scrambled in a panic, tripping over each other. One smacked into the wall with a pitiful little “ow.” Touya sighed, running a hand down his face.

Definitely stupid. But he didn’t regret it.

The image of your soft smile replayed in his mind as he stepped into your apartment and shut the door behind him.

“Where’s the food? I’m starving.”

___________________________________________________________ A/N: That’s all the flashback for now. This chapter is mostly about building the foundation of Remedy and Touya’s friendship

Please note that everyone who has been given a name or description serves a purpose in the story. For example, the older lady mentioned in this chapter is Ms. Sugars, who is protective of Remedy’s children, as seen back in Chapter Five. Ms. Sugars has known Remedy since she was a little girl, and from Touya’s perspective, it’s clear that Remedy is her favorite.

As for why Remedy showed hesitation, even though everyone told her not to limit herself, that will be answered later. Remedy failed the hero exam, and as she implies, it was her fault but in reality, it wasn’t her fault. It was simply out of her hands.

To be honest, under different circumstances, she could have easily slipped through the cracks of society. There are factors contributing to Remedy’s hesitation, slowly shaping her into who she will become 11 years later. Someone who doesn’t take shit from anyone and is confident in her abilities. Adult Remedy has found a way to find the balance to be soft and kind but also not to be pushover. 

 While Remedy is confident in her abilities in private, it’s a different ball game when you’re exposed to the world. Thank you again to everyone who commented on the last chapter <3, and I passed the class! :3 Extra: I may or may not do the Tomura story version with his own kid (clone), which will be revealed later on in this book. Unlike Touya, who has been out of the loop for the past five years, Shigaraki became aware after his trial wrapped in court, which was two years ago. That’s a whole can of worms... and drama.

Any thoughts or theories? I’m all ears! I’d love to hear them. I have seen some interesting theories :3

[the-great-zalmoxis]

The Giving Oasis

There once was an Oasis in the sea of sands.

It tempered the desert and the well-spoken winds.

It had clear water, as shiny as a stone

All polished and glossy

Like the tomb of a phaeron.

It stood there, all growing buds and canopy

But now, alone and so empty

Like a chrysoprase sea.

But one day, the zephyrs rolled about a tiny little child.

The Oasis with its palms loved the little child,

As the small one played and laughed

Climbed the tree trunks,

And swam, like in the Nile,

Catching the fish, and the shade as it was.

Resting all day, in the cold that was offered,

They would play senet

And other fun games,

Until the young boy was tucked for the day,

Gently covered by a soft palm leaf from the tree.

Listening to the whispers,

And the murmurs of the wind

As the Oasis spoke in fables and taught about

The leaves, the waters, and the stone of the dynasty.

And so the Oasis was happy.

As time went

The boy left to tread the desert

The Oasis was again alone.

Without the little soft boy,

So scared and so infirm.

As time passed,

And the little boy grew older

One day, he crawled back to the Oasis,

On crutches and chairs, to greet the canopy, bright with viridity.

“Come, little boy”, said the Oasis. “Come swim among the fishes, sleep in the shade, and climb on the trunks.”

“I will gladly do so”, said the boy with glee.” For I know that my life shall always be this shade of green.”

Then the Oasis took a moment to think,

And recognized the danger that the little boy sought to hint.

„Come, little boy, come and I shall teach,

How to gather fish and scarabs to cook and eat.

Then you will have nothing to fear.”

And so the boy splashed and dove in

Catching all fifty silver fish from the Oasis’s basin.

Before leaving so eagerly,

And the Oasis was happy.

But the boy stayed away for a long time...

And the Oasis was sad.

And then one day, the boy came back, and the Oasis shook with joy.

He said, “Come, little boy”, said the Oasis. “Come sleep in the shade, and climb on the trunks.”

“I am too busy to sit and sleep”, said the boy.

“I want to silence the raging sandstorms,

I want to lead the silver seas.

Can you help me with that?”

“I cannot help you here.” Said the Oasis.

“For the sand that lies on the cold stones is my home,

But you can cut off my canopy,

To use, to cover yourself from storm.

Tucked away from harm, and from arid lunacy.”

And the boy cut off the leaves and carried them off,

Leaving to safety, and to farther away.

And the Oasis was happy.

But the boy stayed away for a long time.

And when he came back,

The Oasis was so happy,

He could hardly sing.

“Come boy,” he whispered,

“Come climb on my trunks,

To see in the distance, and learn more in fact.”

“I am too old to learn.”

Said the boy.

“I have come to act,

I need resources and troops to fight back.

Can you give me your troops?”

“That I cannot do.” Said the Oasis.

“But you can cut down my trunks,

And make a boat,

To carry you where you need to be.”

And so the boy cut down his trunks

And made a boat and sailed away.

And the Oasis was happy

... but not really.

And after a long time

The boy came back again.

“I am sorry boy,”

Said the Oasis.

“I have nothing left that I can give you.

My fish are caught.” Said the Oasis

“I have no need for lessons now.”

Said the boy.

“My canopy is cut.” Said the Oasis.

“I cannot rest now.”

Said the boy.

“My trunks are gone,

And build into a fleet

It shall arrive soon, but I have nothing to gift.”

“I have no time to wait for them.” Said the boy.

“I am sorry.” Said the Oasis.

“But I need to run, and the night is so dark.”

Said the boy.

“Set fire to my stumps,” Said the Oasis with pride.

“Such old and dry wood,

Will burn with much might.”

“Come boy, bring the flame in sight.

Light me ablaze, and run into the night.”

And the boy did.

And the Oasis was happy.

-------------- Thank @deathmark8128 for the spell check!

[stellargh0ul]

i see your perpetua panty smelling. i ask, copia smelling your panties and getting caught by you doing it. and you simply must teach him a lesson 😌

thank you for all the work you do MWAH

I always love seeing the Avocado in my notes! thank you for sending in this prompt <3

-

you aren’t entirely sure what you’ve walked into at first when you enter your apartments in the Ministry- the lights are on, but dimmed, and there’s a figure sitting your bed with its back to you. your first instinct is to scream that there’s an intruder, before you recognize the man; it’s Copia, your partner.

your next mystery is to figure out exactly what he’s doing, because he seems so engrossed with it that he hasn’t even noticed you walk in. you wait for a moment, in case he turns around, but in doing so, you hear something odd.

he moans out your name, in a tone of voice you know very well.

swiftly, you walk around your bed in time to see a pair of your panties clutched in one of his hands, the fabric wrapped around his cock. Copia’s other hand is in his mouth, teeth biting into the meat of his palm as he chokes out your name once more, pumping himself rapidly with your panties providing extra friction.

“what are you doing?” you ask, though it’s incredibly clear now what he’s doing, and he jumps about a mile.

Copia’s eyes fly open and he looks at you, hand still on his cock, before he glances down and realizes that the panties he was using to masturbate are visible. you can almost see the calculation in his head- there’s no point in trying to hide them, not when you both can see what’s happening as clear as day.

“amore, I…”

“bend over the bed,” you order him, your tone sudden and sharp. Copia physically flinches away from you.

“Madonna, please, i’m so sorry, I was just-“

“I can see what you were doing. I said to bend over the bed. surely a slut who had no problem stealing my panties to jerk off with can recognize what I want, right?”

he babbles out more half excuses but does as you ask, dropping the pair of panties and turning to bend himself over the edge of the bed. you raise his robes- his pants are already around his ankles and so you don’t have to worry about fabric taking the force of the impact.

“count them,” you order him. in truth, you’re not nearly as angry as you ought to be: it’s almost cute, the way he’d taken something of yours, moaning out your name as he jerked himself off.

but- some things definitely had to be punished, and this was one of them. he knew he wasn’t allowed to cum without your permission.

you pull your hand back and deliver a strike with full force against his backside, sending Copia forward into the bedsheets. you note, with some satisfaction, that a pool of pre is drooling out the tip of his cock afterwards.

“o-one,” Copia mutters.

“good.”

another strike, on the other cheek, and he can’t stifle the yelp that falls from his lips.

“oh, baby, did that hurt?” you ask, teasingly. “if it did, you’re certainly not going to have fun for the next 48.”

[sweatertheman]

All this is pretty good! I will say, I think you're underselling Susie's importance to Ralsei a tad. While yes, Ralsei is always relying on Kris to tell him what is and isn't okay, and holding their opinion in the highest regard, this is a bad thing.

If Ralsei can't move forward at all until Kris tells him it's okay, he isn't really moving forward at all. He's dependent on their approval and their orders to tell him it's okay to be himself and that he has value. Not working through his trauma, but merely comforting it. Look! It's okay! Kris thinks you have value again! They said they were sorry! Now you can just forget you were abandoned and everything will be fine! Except that's not how it works. Hearing Kris say he has value makes him happy, because of course it does, but it doesn't heal the trauma he underwent. A person who was neglected or abused by their parent and recieves an apology and efforts to repair the damage after the fact may feel grateful and happy, but that act alone won't stop them from fearing it could happen again. The person needs to realize, on their own or with help, that their value isn't tied to the approval and attention of others, but is intrinsic, and that they need to put their trauma behind them.

The reason Susie is important is because she circumvents his behavior. She drags him out of his comfort zone by force and puts him into positions where he has to be his own person, has to make his own choices. Her very nature demands it, as she cannot be placated by shows of subservience. In order to get anywhere with her, he needs to grow a spine. Needs to be willing to tell her no, to get upset with her, to act more like her equal. That id what allows their friendship to form in the first place. And from there, she drags him away from Kris to go play and talk and be normal for a change. And it works! When Ralsei is talking to Susie, his dialogue is more natural, and his attempts at humor come across as less practiced. He can be a little snarky with her, he can start to learn more normal behaviors. When he's playing games with her in the Green Room, he's actually able to forget about Kris and the Prophecy and his own worthlessness for a moment. He's excited to tell her about the progress he made in the game because he's proud of himself. He can get upset at the game around her because he knows she isn't going to judge him for it. Even when he's grovelling to Kris, seeking their approval to exist, he's expressing how much Susie inspires him. She's so kind, her hope is infectious, she makes him want to believe he could be more. And on that note, every important lesson about self and morality and hope that Ralsei learns is something Susie teaches him. She teaches him that sometimes being nice isn't the solution. She teaches him that being good is about more than being nice. That being friends is about more than being nice. She affirms that he has value, and that it's not on him to face every burden alone, and to have hope even in the darkest moment. He's grown because of her. He can actually be kind of normal sometimes.

...until he's put in front of Kris. It's not that Susie's friendship is ineffective at healing him. It's that he regresses in front of Kris. All his new feelings and all his new understandings, friendship, self-worth, grey morality, anger, pleasure... when he's put in front of Kris he has to distance himself from these feelings as best he can. Put them all in a little box and ask them if that's what they want. And if they say no, those new feelings stay in the box. Kris doesn't want the feelings to be in the box, but the problem is that there IS a box. Ralsei can't fully grow until he learns and accepts that he shouldn't rely on Kris to validate his existence. That he should be the one to make choices for himself.

"You have the controller, you choose where to go."

Ralsei is the Literal Personification of Abandonment And Self-Esteem Issues - and it's all because Kris threw him away in their childhood.

Been a while since I've done a long-form essay on Ralsei Deltarune! Chapter 3 and 4 really blew the doors wide open on this guy - how he sees himself, how he relates to other darkners, his place in the prophecy (and his attempts to subvert it), how he echoes the goatlike Dreemurrs but isn't a carbon copy of them, and his relationship with Kris Dreemurr particularly, entirely divorced from the SOUL/player possessing them. I've been swirling it all in my head over the past two weeks, trying to figure out what it all says about him, alongside what scant knowledge was established in prior chapters.

This is the result: a thesis that will lay out my vision on who and what Ralsei truly is, why he's manifested in this way, why he dotes on Kris specifically, and how everything ties together to explain some of his more... questionable actions in the chapters we have so far. Altogether, I want to provide context for his actions in previous chapters, his beliefs about himself and darkner-kind in present chapters, and where the future chapters might take his character.

Buckle in, this is going to be a LONG one.

Part 1: "I just wonder what... being "Ralsei-like" even is...?"

Before Chapters 3 and 4 came out, the question of "Who or what is Ralsei" was a rather open-ended one. Concrete evidence was scant, and what little could be gleaned from optional dialogue or careful observation didn't shed much light on anything. For every point that indicated Ralsei was Kris's horned headband, another would refute that and suggest he was created whole cloth as a character for the player's enjoyment. Was he a naive, inexperienced youth struggling to deal with his friends' big emotions, or an uncaring gamemaster who was determined to keep events on the rails? Perhaps he was a creation of Gaster - a Goner, like those transient souls we sometimes see in Undertale if we're lucky. Or maybe he was a Titan Spawn, rebelling against his ordained purpose and using his knowledge for the forces of light.

With the new chapters, what we got instead was far more interesting and compelling than any of us could have possibly imagined. What we got... was a scared, lonely, sad boy, burdened with knowledge he didn't ask for, raised in isolation from anything approaching care or compassion, desperate for love and camaraderie but never feeling like he truly deserved it. Alone so long he doesn't know who or what he is, so conditioned by prophecy that he sees himself as little more than a playing piece on a board much grander and more important than himself.

Yet, for the sake of his friends and their happiness... he tries to defy the fate set out before him. Write a happier ending for them... but not for himself. Never for himself.

Because he's a darkner. And darkners don't matter.

Part 2: "Just forget about us and make some real friends."

You do not have to play Deltarune long to get a sense of how Ralsei sees himself in relation to lightners (See: literally anything he says to Kris - we'll visit this later on)... or, for that matter, how he sees darkners as a whole in relation to lightners. Everything is framed through this lens for him, even all the way back in chapter 1:

And chapter 2:

All of which culminates in the bombshell revelation at the beginning of Chapter 3 - Darkners are nothing more than inanimate objects given life by some sort of "meta-darkness", permitted to exist only in a liminal, "indistinct" state of being. For all intents and purposes, darkners are entirely imaginary... and Ralsei is entirely, painfully aware of that fact, even as he's explaining it to Kris and Susie.

Astute players will have noticed clues indicating this truth, and even that Ralsei himself has known about it this whole time - particularly when it comes to getting Kris to gather up all the objects in the Abandoned Classroom to bring back to his Castle Town.

However, the implications of this knowledge that Ralsei possessed, or whether it affected him in any capacity, weren't fully apparent until he tried to "console" Tenna at the end of chapter 3:

"Mr. Tenna… I… understand how you feel. To want to be… important. To be… useful. Perhaps… you might not be watched much anymore… But… that doesn't make you a failure, Tenna! You've brought smiles, light into Lightner's lives… to Kris's family and friends, for so long. So, there's nothing to be ashamed of.If… that ever comes to an end. Darkners.. all become obsolete eventually. But we aren't "real", Tenna. We shouldn't make Lightners worry about what happens to us. It'd just… make them unhappy, wouldn't it?"

This speech is, for want of a better term, a trainwreck. If it was intended to provide comfort and solace, it did the total opposite, and it was only thanks to Susie's timely intervention that Tenna was able to rally. But what it says about how Ralsei feels about his station as a darkner - as the Prince of the Dark, no less - speaks volumes. Stated plainly, he sees the relationship between lightners and darkners as a purely functional, transactional one, where darkners are destined to amuse, entertain and bring happiness to their lightner betters. Once they can no longer sustain that function, for whatever reason... it is then their destiny to be cast out, disposed of, left behind and forgotten. In fact, he goes further than this, implying that darkners as a whole should be GRATEFUL to have been useful in any capacity, and that they should not lament their fate, in case they upset the lightners they are supposed to serve.

To most anyone else, this would be a horrifying portrayal of existence - but to Ralsei, it is his lodestone, the guiding principle that informs his every action. A true darkner would be happy to have served so faithfully, so he thinks... it's not as if he or any of the others are real, in any case, so what they think doesn't even matter in the first place. He will be useful to his friends - his masters - for as long as he can serve, in whatever capacity he can serve.

And Ralsei will condemn himself to abject misery in order to do it.

Part 3: "If anyone's going to hurt... let it... just be me."

To call Ralsei "self-sacrificing" is a level of understatement that borders on the tragically comic. He constantly falls over himself offering his services to Kris and Susie, ensuring they are happy, trying to protect them from things that might make them sad. He sees Lancer "transform" into a stool ONCE, then takes that transformation for himself so he can be a literal object for his friends to use at their convenience - even when there's an actual perfectly usable stool nearby.

(For the record, I don't kinkshame. Go off prince!)

Want more? Okay - Ralsei is so preoccupied with making cakes for Kris and Susie, but has never even attempted to try one for himself - and is then ashamed at how much he enjoys it.

Still not convinced? Okay - Ralsei goes to all the trouble to create bespoke rooms for Kris and Susie in his castle, AND all the major chapter antagonists (except King lol), decorates them all to their occupants' liking... and then we stumble across his room in chapter 4 and it's completely empty. Not even a chair to sit on - Nothing except a small window looking out into the world.

Ah, but luckily, there IS something he feels like he deserves: pain. Physical pain, mental pain, emotional pain... he's such a glutton for punishment that he won't settle for his own pain, but put himself in ever-greater anguish for the sake of his friends... and smile while doing it.

He'll suffer the crushing burden of knowledge, the tragedy of the final prophecy, Kris and Susie thinking he's weird, the PLAYER thinking he's suspicious, being belittled, demeaned, looked down upon and ignored... he'll take it all upon his own shoulders, and not once dare to complain about it.

And for what? To risk alienating the very people he cares so much for? To risk Susie's anger and frustration at his constant pussyfooting around difficult subjects? To one day take on too much, to watch as his careful facade shatters and crumbles around him, to burn himself out so utterly that he ceases to be of any use to anyone?

Good thing he's friends with Susie, right?

...right?

Part 4: "How can she be so kind...? How...?"

Susie sets herself in opposition to Ralsei's worldview from the very start of their adventure, rejecting her status as a hero and walking off to do her own thing. She rebuffs his lofty speeches about "prophecies" and "purpose", choosing instead to trust in what her senses are telling her in the present moment.

And she has very little patience for his more... self-denying tendencies. She'll insist he's real to her and Kris at every turn, she'll pledge to get him furniture for his room and make it the most "bad-ass room in the castle". She'll cut over his "motivational" speech to Tenna and replace it with her own, insisting that "someone wants you" and "no-one's getting thrown away".

Even when faced with the inevitability of the Final Prophecy - the tragic ending that Ralsei has tried so hard to stop her from learning about - she refuses to bow to it, shattering it into a million pieces and reassuring him it won't ever come to pass - because they won't let it.

So it is that Susie's example sets a fire in Ralsei's heart. He finds himself endlessly inspired by her, not in spite of her crass, irreverent manner, but because of it. Everything she does, she does because she WANTS to, not because anyone told her to. And that fills Ralsei with hope - hope, however dim, that perhaps they can defy the cruel fate set out for them.

But hope alone isn't enough.

Part 5: "Darkners... all become obsolete eventually."

This line, taken from the aforementioned trainwreck of a rousing speech to Tenna, perfectly encapsulates everything that Ralsei believes about himself, about darkners in general, and about the way things must be. And it stabs right at the heart of his trauma.

Because he has already experienced it firsthand.

This is the point where we must venture into conjecture - everything I've established over the past few minutes has laid the groundwork for my theory on what Ralsei is, why he's the way he is, and how we might predict how he'll behave in future chapters.

Remember Toriel talking about Kris's old horned headband back in chapter 1? How they asked her when their horns would grow in? How they wore it for months, before it suddenly, mysteriously disappeared? Those horns played a role in Kris's life, and an important one at that - they helped to validate their feelings around their identity, allowed them to feel more akin to their adoptive family, more like a monster and less like... an outsider. To have lost or otherwise misplaced such a treasured object would be unthinkable.

Now... have you noticed the way that Ralsei will fawn over Kris specifically throughout their adventures together? How he'll doggedly follow in Kris's shadow no matter what they do or how they act? How he'll excuse them any behaviour, no matter if he'd rebuke another for that same behaviour? How he'll go out of his way to reassure them, console them? Validate their identity, their talents, their choices - to an almost obsessive degree?

Put these points side-by-side, and you start to see how they correlate with each other - how Ralsei's behavior in the present follows on from the headband's role in Kris's past. It is the strongest indication we have that Ralsei's light world object is more likely than not to be that very same horned headband. Indeed, the parallels between them are so strong that once you see them, it's almost impossible to believe otherwise. It neatly explains Ralsei's almost crush-like obsession with Kris, his need to validate their identity at all costs, and his acute embarrassment and joy at being seen as their equal.

But my assertion goes further than this anodyne observation: I assert that, at some point after wearing the headband for months, Kris realised that they were NEVER going to be a true monster, a true Dreemurr... that they'd always be shackled to their humanity, no matter what. And so, far from accidentally losing the headband, they made the conscious decision to throw it away once they realised the lie it represented. It had served its purpose, brought joy to a child who felt like they didn't belong... and then its purpose was used up, and it was discarded.

Abandoned.

At a stroke, this explains all of Ralsei's strange behaviours - his obsessive need to be useful, his almost-slavish devotion to the happiness of his lightner friends, his twisted and utilitarian views on darkner-kind, and his own catastrophic lack of self esteem. He is TERRIFIED of being abandoned again, and will do anything in his power to remain useful, to not become obsolete and unwanted... and yet at exactly the same time, he sees it as his inevitable fate. One day, his use will run out, and without warning he'll be cast back into obscurity. And try as he might, there is nothing Ralsei can do about it.

He failed in his purpose once before... and he could just as easily fail it again.

Part 6: "Hearing that from you... I might just..."

I've mentioned before that Susie attempts to counteract Ralsei's narrative that neither he nor the other darkners are "real", and that none of them really matter in the grand scheme of things. She loudly proclaims the opposite, any chance she gets, asserts her profound believe that Ralsei IS real, and that they ARE friends. And not just Ralsei - her concern and compassion extends to ALL darkners. It's sweet and touching, and brings the two of them closer together.

And none of it has any effect on Ralsei's view of the world whatsoever. To him, Susie's grand platitudes are just that - they can enkindle hope in his heart that their grim future can be averted, and they can bring comfort in a moment of insecurity... but they alone cannot heal his trauma. Because while he DOES desperately want to hear those words spoken to him, it's not Susie he wants to hear them from.

It's Kris.

And we know this because there are two instances where Kris CAN say something approaching those words to him - once in chapter 2's Acid Tunnel, where they can say "It's nice that Ralsei is Ralsei", and again in Chapter 4, upon discovering Ralsei's unfurnished room, they can say "Please be yourself". And the way he reacts in both instances is telling:

The takeaway here is that, no matter how ardently Susie proclaims and validates Ralsei's fundamental identity and existence, it won't be until Kris echoes that sentiment, freely and of their own volition, that he'll begin to truly believe it for himself. It has to come from Kris - the one who had once needed him to validate their own identity, before they unknowingly consigned him to loneliness and bereavement.

Perhaps at that point, Ralsei's trauma can finally begin to heal from the damage that was done to him.

Part 7: "My own desires. My own... fears."

So. Now that we've reached this point... where does Ralsei's character arc go from here? How can we use what we've built up here to try and anticipate where Chapter 5 might take him, and how his relationships with Kris, Susie, and everyone else will change as a result?

We see glimmers of what it could look like in his talk with Kris, discussing him coming to discover his own likes and dislikes, his own selfish desires... contrasted with the "hobbies" he took up just as a way to further serve his lightner friends, and the internal conflict he feels at such:

I don't really have any hobbies, or interests. Baking, sewing, singing... those are all just... things I thought to do... for you two. But recently... I'm starting to feel like... like I'm developing my own opinions. My own likes. My own dislikes. My own desires. My own... fears. ...please... tell me... should I... Should a... Darkner... be feeling like this?

Do I think this means he'll one day abandon the persona he's so carefully curated up to this point? No - rather, I believe he will iterate and build upon it. His edges may become a little coarser, but fundamentally he'll still be the same caring, considerate fluffy boy we all know and love.

But that isn't to say there won't be bumps in the road along the way.

I brought up Chapter 5 specifically because of a few interesting hints about what it will entail. In Susie's trial against Gerson, he mentions the events of each chapter we've run into up to this point, and also this hint for Chapter 5's content:

Now, most people will see this and infer that this "jealousy" will be from Asgore, upon discovering that Toriel has shacked up with Sans. And while I do believe he will have his part to play, allow me to add another potential point to consider: I think RALSEI will be the one to experience this burning jealousy for the first time - and in its newfound intensity, make a crucial mistake that could wind up making things worse down the line.

Jealousy that he cannot be at peace with his purpose like the other darkners seem to be.

Jealousy that it took him so long to realise he could start to be his own person, independent of the lightners.

Jealousy that Susie's healing capabilities are beginning to eclipse his own, his "unique talent".

Jealousy that he cannot have what everyone else takes for granted - a normal, carefree life.

Jealousy that Kris seems to prefer Susie over him.

I believe that chapter 5 will be the point in the story where Ralsei's sense of purpose and obligation crashes headlong into his new, burgeoning wants as his own person, and he'll finally begin to reckon with the events of his past... how he was loved and cherished only to be thrown away without warning. The sadness and the bewilderment of such a traumatic event... but also, the resentment, the bitterness.

What had I done wrong to deserve such treatment? Why did I have to suffer like this? Why couldn't I have been kept, even if just as a memento?

Why won't Kris look at me the way they look at Susie...?

How can I get them to see me the way they used to?

Why can't we go back to the way things were before?

And where else would such an epiphany take place but the very space where another person struggles with their own questions about the past, and where every flower is seemingly grown for the sole purpose of proving his undying love to his former partner, in the hope that things may one day go back to the way they were before...?

Indeed, once you see the parallels between Ralsei and Asgore, they're almost impossible to unsee. And the more I think about it, the more certain I become that this is where Ralsei's character arc is progressing towards - a reckoning with the past, a lamentation at the present... and a resentment that threatens to burn down the very future he's fought for so valiantly up to this point.

And oh, what an inferno it will create.

Closing Thoughts: "I want to believe... it can change!"

Ralsei is a character who has been largely misunderstood by the fandom at large for a long time. Part of my motivation for writing this essay was to help steer people towards a more nuanced understanding of his behaviours, his role in the story, his potential past and future, and his strange, almost limerent connection with Kris. The scenario I outlined in the previous part was an attempt to show what I believe would be the most interesting and compelling direction for his character to go in, based on everything that had been established in both the game and my speculation up to that point. I hope that I have succeeded on this point.

I should say right now, for the purposes of clearing up any potential misunderstandings: I don't believe this potential is in any way indicative that Ralsei's gonna turn "evil" - just that he's a young person suffering a great deal from immense trauma and crushing responsibility, who doesn't have much experience with people, or even his own feelings, and who has the potential to lose control at a crucial moment. That doesn't make him evil - it makes him a person.

Likewise with Kris "abandoning" Ralsei - that act doesn't make them evil. Indeed, how could they have possibly known the significance of that action prior to reuniting with him years later? How many precious toys have you thrown away in your lifetime, and does the act of doing so make you some kind of villain? Perhaps in a world where darkners have the potential to exist... but otherwise, the question is ridiculous and doesn't merit discussion.

I suppose what I wanted to achieve by writing this essay is to allow people to see in Ralsei what I see in him - a flawed, tragic character, struggling to make sense of himself and his place in the world; to love and trust people as he finds them, not as he wishes them to be; to have the courage and belief to let go of the injustices of the past, and to face the uncertain future without fear... wherever it may take him.

I see a great deal of my own prior struggles in Ralsei. It's why I strongly believe that, if not actually autistic, he has been written with autistic coding in mind - the masking, the people-pleasing, the lack of finer social mores... but those same traits that endear him to me seemed to repel a great many others. I don't want a repeat of the chapter 2 times, I don't want his character to be defined by a misunderstanding like it has been up to this point. I hope that, after reading this, you all feel the same way.

Thank you so much for reading <3

special thanks to @dawnthefluffyduck and @bleakoutlo for their input and suggestions! :D

[m0r1bund]

I know most artists are probably annoyed to hell and back with art advice questions…

No idea on your stance so I’ll ask

How do you do format your backgrounds?? Like the perspective, the empty space versus detail, what shape to make the canvas, all that stuff, idk.

I can imagine detailed stuff in my head but in practice I flounder to even begin to put it to paper so is there some sort of method to the madness?

Lastly, do you think it’s a good idea to start by drawing over real life images as a way to learn?

That’s all, thank you

Hi, sorry this took a while. No worries about asking, I’ve been there and I think we sometimes underestimate how much people like to feel helpful and to talk about their process. I have an awful memory, so it’s hard for me to retrace my steps sometimes, but I’ll try!

I remember being in a similar place where my mind’s eye was far ahead of my technical skill. This still happens, I don’t think it ever really goes away, I just remember it feeling especially pronounced and frustrating when I was younger.

context: I used to be really frustrated with my inability to finish or even start large, meticulously detailed pieces, especially landscapes and environmental pieces. This changed as my technical skill started to catch up with my mind’s eye, and I could execute things faster and faster, before my brain would arbitrarily decide a piece was “done.” I’ve had this lifelong tension between trying to become a faster artist so that I can strike while the iron is hot, while also accepting that my brain is wired a certain way, I don’t have to make myself suffer by working against my own brain, and it’s OK to make slow art. for all the grief it gives me, the ADHD hyperfocus / state of flow is part of the process and I do genuinely love it.

So with that in mind, here’s some pointers that I’ve personally found useful.

done > perfect, started > not started, always and forever. Lower the bar as much as you need to. I think this can be rough for those who are less motivated by the process and more by communicating something as it exists in their head. Unfortunately I am learning this lesson over and over, that a piece simply will not happen unless I make it feasible for myself. Can it be done faster and shittier? Can you settle for getting one or two things “right” and letting the rest turn out how it may?  

Taking up photography, studying photographers, and yes, tracing / photobashing / painting over photos (with appropriate permission.) Sometimes it’s more intuitive to find the composition than it is to make it from scratch. I’m lucky to live in the place that I draw, so it takes less guess-work to translate it to my art, but I also just think it’s fun to cultivate an eye for composition using the world around you.   I think creating your own references also teaches you things that studying curated art will not. You interacted with the space in-person, so you have valuable insight into how the space feels and the relationship between objects that you can’t glean just from a picture. It’s also got the beauty of the amateur’s eye. Contrast won’t be perfectly balanced, you’ll get to work with weird color combos under weirder lighting, things won’t be massed very intentionally, etc. What’s interesting to you about the subject is ultimately unique to you, and you get to bring that out.   Video game photography is another fun way of studying someone else’s work. Virtual landscapes are intentionally composed, down to the massing/lighting/visual clutter, so in a competently-designed environment it’s easier to find picturesque vistas or neat places to stage your subject. More fun, maybe less frustrating than exploring an environment that isn’t similar to one you want to depict.   I like sandbox games for DIY scene-setting too. Staging stuff in blender, making rough clay models, whatever you need to do to feel out the space.  

Ditto the above for studying other mediums that you enjoy. I feel like it’s glaringly obvious when I want something to be a 10-part animated series or, like, a tapestry, because that’s just where I go to when I’m pulling from my mental library.   Maybe part of why I gravitated to film and animation is because you can see changes in composition, focus, perspective, etc. happening in real time, so it’s easier to notice them, and to reflect on how they change the meaning of the scene.  

Leveraging your limits. Limited palette, limited time, limited scope, whatever. Easier to play with values when you’re working in black and white than when you add color to the mix. And hey, what can you uniquely do when you’re working under certain limits that you can’t do if you had free reign of a blank canvas? Pixel art, polychrome pottery, noir… The limits of a form make it memorable, or however that saying goes.  

Massing detail and polish around the focal point of the piece. I don’t think I’m very intentional about this with my finished work, I usually play with contrast or negative space to bring attention to things. but I often do this with my quick-and-dirty art like Basedt and Threadbare. I polish the bare minimum to communicate what I need to, and then leave the rest to imagination.   like anything else it’s just another tool in your toolbox, not as useful to those with very detailed work that choose to guide the eye in other ways.  

Thinking of the environment as its own character(s). Some of us get into art because we’re having fun drawing our favorite characters or our OCs, so backgrounds are just that--- backgrounds, scene-setting, all secondary to the main event, not as interesting or exciting to draw. I am personally trying to get rid of the mental boundary between subject and environment, because that’s more in line with how I feel about worldbuilding and life in general. They’re inseparable, they feed into one another, and it does me better to think about them holistically.   Corollary to that: Environments can be fun! A lot of people think of them as drudgery, but I don’t think you have to self-flagellate doing a hundred still-life master studies if that’s not the most efficient way for you to learn. We can and should do difficult things, but I don’t know, I think you can trick yourself into getting excited about drawing cars or buildings or rocks. For me, it’s exciting to explore my headworlds through the eyes of the fake people who live in my head. I guess having that touchstone of something that’s familiar alongside something that’s unfamiliar makes it more fun. When the switch finally flipped, it was really rewarding to realize I was scribbling landscapes as the “main event,” and the inclusion of a character was a last-minute thing if it happened at all. It can be fun! It doesn’t have to suck! But it takes time.  

OK, I think that’s all I got right now. As usual, glean what’s useful to you and forget the rest. There are others who can speak more competently about technical stuff than I can, and I’m sure I’m overlooking something obvious. this is just what sticks with me, personally.

[direwombat]

listen. i'm always happy whenever someone leaves a comment because they enjoy my writing. whether it's a quick "love it!" or a longer dissection of whatever they've read, it warms my heart that they took the time out of their day, however brief, to let me know that they liked my work. i don't consider myself entitled to receive comments for posting my work, which makes every single one i get a gift!

but comments like these (particularly ones that come from profiles that haven't posted fic and are aggregates of bookmarks*) really do leave a bad taste in my mouth:

so, let me spell some things out for anyone who may be unaware:

I don't write for you.

I write for myself.

I am writing fic for free in the little spare time i have.

You are not entitled to my (or anyone else's) work

i haven't posted fic to ao3 since literally january of this year. i also wish i were posting fic more frequently, trust me. the only thing worse than writing is not writing. but asking "where's the rest????" and "part 2????" only activates my spite response to not post. you'll get updates to fics when you get updates. writing fanfiction is a hobby for me. i do it for fun. but i also take my craft (writing) very seriously. i want to write a good, compelling story and i take great care in the writing process. it's laborious to begin with, and on top of that, i am a meticulous planner. it takes me much longer to write a fic than it does for you to read it -- yes, even for the short ones and smutfics!

it's the famous "pick two: high quality, cheap, and fast", and unfortunately for all of us, if you want my "not bad"-writing and have it also remain free, then you're gonna have to be patient.

*i'm not saying that this is an incorrect way to use ao3. if you're using ao3 as a place to keep track of the fics you like, that's a valid way to use the site, and not what i'm mad about. it's the entitlement.

[rawliverandgoronspice]

I'm glad totk has no connection to the previous ganon (oot-onwards) because it would totally ruin him as a character.

Honestly I consider totk ganondorf separate even from botw, because I do love the idea of botw ganon being a completely self-dehumanized, seething, eldritch representation of this ageless grudge no one has any context for anymore, so he might as well be understood as a natural disaster or a vicious plague. I find this incredibly juicy!! Buuuut to me it only works within the context of a dozen other games building the ground up for this goopy, demonic, hateful incarnation with too many limbs and far too many angry eyes.

If you decide to connect BotW Ganon to TotK Ganondorf however.... like. I'm sorry, but. Sir, you are not this angry. You have zero reason to be anywhere near this level of rancor. You haven't even been stabbed, ever!!!! You never had your wish ripped out from under you!!!! You have never been forced to rot away in the void while fully aware of every agonizing second for centuries, not even a single time!!!! Rauru merely grounded you so you'd have your little power nap (:>), and then you woke up with renewed energy to topple down the other kid's sand castle just because it's fun to watch him cry. And honestly TotK Ganondorf does kind of feel like a toddler, gleeful to discover his own capacity for destruction for the first time. Which. I guess that could have been, something? I don't know, to me it's still pretty stupid and inconsistent honestly. But either way, that is not Dislocated Screeching Essence of a Mad Pig material.

TotK Ganondorf has no grudge, and as far as we know (which is insane!!!! this guy's core characterization is envy, yet he doesn't have this corrosive toxic energy at all in totk!!! he's far too happy to be here and break stuff just because, and like sir you are a grown man you've been a king for decades what are you so giddy aboutttt), the worse he had to suffer through in totk, as far as the game tells us, was a temporary humiliation. Which could absolutely be motivating for sure, but it feels very human and political and measured. Not "I will shred my own skin and forget my own name and suffer death a thousand times over just to show you all the depths of my hate" levels of fury. Again, to remove our familiarity to the character as players cheapens decades of buildup, and!!!!!!! anyway. Anyway.

anyway.

[scatterbrainedbot]

Hello :D

You're so cool

Anyway have you thought that in your rat sons au Splinter might outlive the boys?

You're very cool :D love your stuff dude

(tw for some blood, light gore, implied overdose (kinda??))

hi copper!!! this is a fantastic question!

so obviously typical irl rats have far shorter lifespans than the average irl tortoise. according to google (yes, be awed by my spectacularly in-depth wealth of research) the average pet rat lives between 2-4 years ish, and the oldest on record lived to be about 7. meanwhile, an African spurred tortoise (Splinter's species) averages more around a 50ish year lifespan in captivity, tho is suspected to possibly exceed 75 or more in the wild.

Now, the mutation does give us a lot of wiggle room for playing with these numbers. For the rat sons boys, id say their natural lifespan probably clocks in at about 45-55 years old? definitely not old by human standards, but not young young either. (though, its also important to note that the boys were exposed to the mutagen just days after being born.)

For Splinter, meanwhile, aging is slightly more complicated. He lived the vast majority of his life as a regular normal African spurred tortoise (well, non-mutated at least. there were perhaps some shenanigans of a more mystical variety going on before he was mutated, but thats a separate matter) He was about 70ish i think? when the boys were born and they were all exposed to the mutagen. so he is already distinctly an old man turtle papa. id guess he'd probably still have another eh lets say 25-30 years after his mutation. he could probably push it a little farther even with some mystic nonsense, but when push comes to shove id say his 'natural' post-mutation lifespan would put his death like a solid decade or two before his sons.

of course, the tricky part of the matter is that theres no way for Splinter to know any of this. theres no way for him to know how the mutation affected them all, or if it even affected them all in the same way. especially since the boys dont show many physical signs of mutation for the first few years, and just kinda look like normal rats, (albeit with a more human sort of intelligence) — what sort of health standard do you hold them to? what if they simply dont show external signs of sickness or old age anymore? how do you actually know if something is wrong?

for a while there Splinter is very worried that one of his babies will just essentially reach the end of their normal rat lifespan, fall and not get up again.

so mostly, he just tries to live in the moment, enjoying whatever time he does have with his little ones, taking each day as a gift <3

still,

that fear

never

really

goes

away.....

[nullfier]

i could talk all day about mori's treatment of dazai and the way he abused his power over him but i'd rather talk about the ways in which he is still doing it, despite dazai having left the mafia. as we know, dazai left the mafia under oda's instruction, a promise he made to his dying friend in which he said he would become a good person, and be on the side that saves people. oda said, the sides make no difference to you, so he knows for a fact that dazai has no reason to do these things, when good and evil are mere concepts for him and not something he feels drawn to either way. a take i've seen often and one that i quite like is not only did mori have oda killed for the mafia's own personal gain (the deal struck so that they could operate under legal means), but it falls back on mori grooming dazai to one day take his seat. up until this point, dazai has never had anything worth protecting, has never lost anything, has never grieved anything and never experienced the emotional call to despair.

odasaku's death and thus dazai's push into the light, which ends up being with the ada, is the final piece that mori needed to solidify that dazai would one day be able to take his place. they talk about it, dazai says you were afraid of me, weren't you? and in more ways than one, the statement is true. mori had always known that he would and always wanted for dazai to surpass him, but the husk that dazai had become by never wanting anything, never protecting anything scared him if dazai was to dispose of him and assume his seat, because although dazai is a genius, he was callous and didn't value anything. he wouldn't value the mafia like mori does, he wouldn't protect yokohama like mori does. during the guild arc, mori says if dazai was still my right-hand man, the guild would stand no chance. dazai inside of the mafia and outside of it exists as a powerful adversary to whomever he stands against, and i think this is one of many reasons why the ada and the port mafia exist somewhat in tandem. the port mafia and the ada overstep their boundaries from time to time with each other, but the truth lies in mori knowing that dazai could ruin them if he intended to.

in something of a tldr mori aims to push dazai out of the mafia just as much as he intends to keep him within it. he needs dazai to experience loss, needs him to experience what it feels like to protect something, what it feels like to want to protect something. the fact that after dazai left, mori has not replaced his seat as an executive. has not replaced dazai as his right-hand with someone else, continuously offers him his position back means he fully intends to have him back under his wing again, someday. means he fully expects, once dazai has experienced what he needs him to, that he will take over his position, and he will drive dazai back to him. yosano and dazai serve as two prizes that mori currently does not have on his mantle, and in the deal struck with the president of the agency, those are the two he is most likely to pluck out of their ranks to put right back into his own.

[widevibratobitch]

so what that i slept in for the exam. my voice teacher just called to talk about yesterdays concert and said some truly insane shit that made me cry again (but like. in a good way lol) so who even gives a shit lol

[i23kazu]

idk ab yall, but i fully believe that everything happens for a reason :-) life is interesting indeed

[thestarmaker]

It's a shame owl city hasn't put out anything new in like ten years. But ending on the ultraviolet ep means he at least went out on a good note. Too bad nothing came of that ep

[froggieboisposts]

I Am Going To Lose My Shit :)