#tbf a very real and massive problem

[tumorhead]

there are people who genuinely think all 1 billion+ Chinese people are coordinating to do propaganda when they talk to media or post online. please drink a glass of water and go outside.

[astonmartinii]

day four: rock(ette)ing around the christmas tree

pairing: pierre gasly x fem rockette reader

high kicks this, high kicks that, pierre is ready to kick off because his job is getting in the way of his festive wag duties

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

yourusername

liked by pierregasly, charles_leclerc and 238,044 others

yourusername: back in the concrete jungle wet dream tomato for another round of rockette duty !!!

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user1: how does it feel to live my dream

user2: its not fair that 1. she’s a literal rockette 2. looks like that and 3. is with a whole ass f1 driver ???

user3: everyone saying that she’s lucky to be with him but have we considered that he’s massively batting above his league?

user4: real …. i hope their babies have her hairline

pierregasly: HUH???

yukitsunoda0511: i make sure to remind him everyday 🫶🏻

user5: obsessed with yuki’s need to humble pierre all the time

yukitsunoda0511: he bagged a queen and has made it everyone else’s problem since

yourusername: can you blame him?

pierregasly: don’t answer that yuki

charles_leclerc: please please please come back right now this whiny french man won’t shut up

yourusername: … it’s my job

charles_leclerc: well i’d also argue that wrangling this oversized puppy with attachment issues is also your job

yourusername: no it’s my passion! there’s a difference

pierregasly: seeeeeee !!!! i am loved :(

yourusername: you are! but please cool it on the texts, i got so many going through the TSA that they thought i had a vibrator in my carry on 😭

pierregasly: WITHOUT ME?

yourusername: babe can we not read?

pierregasly: oh! lol i was ready to fight the world of battery operated sex toys

estebanocon: you need help

pierregasly: LEAVE ME ALONE

user6: smile guys i think we’re in the original

user7: bro is crashing out

user8: tbf i’d give my left ball to have a chance with y/n

pierregasly: i will castrate you for free if you even think about her!

yourusername: so romantic <3

pierregasly

liked by charles_leclerc, yukitsunoda0511 and 524,087 others

tagged: yourusername

pierregasly: engine failures got me missing my girl :(

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user10: my one dream this christmas is to get a man this in love with me

user11: really waiting for my grapes to kick in

user12: any second now i swear...

yourusername: mine took three years to come true so hang on

pierregasly: as if i wasn't manifesting you

yukitsunoda0511: bro retired but still hasn't caused any damage this year damn

pierregasly: told them to give me the projected damages for the season as a bonus so i could treat my girl

yukitsunoda0511: ... and nothing for the guy who is actually at all of the races ???

pierregasly: that is your job?

yukitsunoda0511: and i just comfort you after the races for the love of the game?

pierregasly: yes?

yukitsunoda0511: well it looks like i'll be looking for a new boyfriend this christmas

yourusername: what the hell, sure

user13: y/n just giving up against yukierre

yourusername: sometimes you gotta just sit back and let them get it out

yourusername: and also i do actually get invited to pierre's house in milan (i do also live there)

yukitsunoda0511: THAT IS A SORE SUBJECT Y/N WHY WOULD YOU GO THERE

yourusername: you're calling my boyfriend your boyfriend in public instagram comments?

yukitsunoda0511: PLEASE STAY IN NEW YORK FOREVER

pierregasly: yuki ???

yourusername: that's not very christmas spirit of you yuki

user14: y/n is thousands of miles away but still pulled into the scraps

pierregasly: i'm glad she loves me and puts up with it

yukitsunoda0511: why are you both being so mean to me today :(

yourusername: it's the christmas presents that keep me around (jokes, OBVIOUSLY)

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, yukitsunoda0511 and 2,109,778 others

tagged: pierregasly, danielricciardo & landonorris

charles_leclerc: i've stolen his phone so he won't see this but @yourusername he's scarily easy to kidnap

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user15: so we're on kidnap now... i think the season needs to finish now

user16: no we gotta see how far they are taking it

user17: there's no race in qatar because half of the grid have been arrested lol

francocolapinto: please manifest it i need one of their seats

user18: so real

charles_leclerc: i hate to break it to you franco but you're also on the plane

francocolapinto: don't be dumb charles, i know that, i'm just too pretty to go to jail

charles_leclerc: if anyone is too pretty to go to jail on this AIRPLANE IT IS ME NOW PUT YOUR PHONE DOWN PIERRE IS GETTING SUSPICIOUS

user19: FRANCO IS THERE?

user20: are they all there ???

maxverstappen1: when all is done i don't wanna hear from ANY of them that i don't do anything for them

charles_leclerc: sorry good sir but not all of us have a private jet we can use at the drop of a hat

maxverstappen1: oh i know, i will just hold this over all of you (especially pierre) for as long as i can

charles_leclerc: it's pierre's surprise, why would you hold it against him

maxverstappen1: because i can 👌

yourusername: so on a scale of 1 - 10 how worried should i actually be?

maxverstappen1: very.

charles_leclerc: MAX

charles_leclerc: all is under control y/n do not worry

yourusername: i gotta go warm up for my show tonight i better not finish the show to news reports that my boyfriend is dead

charles_leclerc: he will be alive!

yourusername: and well?

charles_leclerc: i don't want to make that guarantee

yourusername: EXCUSE ME?

charles_leclerc: what? my lawyers told me to never make promises i can't 100% deliver on?

yourusername: well consider me worried

user21: they're defo doing what we think they're doing right

oscarpiastri: if you've got more than two brain cells and the ability to read context cues you will know, it's not the craziest surprise ever

charles_leclerc: we're not in a country rn, maritime laws and all that - THINK

user22: .... riiiiiiiiiiiiight

yukitsunoda0511

liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1 and 489,205 others

tagged: pierregasly & yourusername

yukitsunoda0511: using this love sick fool as an excuse to visit new york

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user24: they took him to nyc to see y/n !!! that's so cute i can't

user25: are they going to go to y/n's show ???

maxverstappen1: they weren't allowed my jet without the assurance that we were going to that damn show

yourusername: you were very happy to see me as someone who recently publicly told me to stay in nyc forever ...

yukitsuonda0511: obviously i said that so we could come visit you !!!

yukitsunoda0511: it was all a part of the plan

charles_leclerc: ummmm you had no part of the plan

yukitsunoda0511: i clearly seduced pierre into not asking questions

yourusername: you're very close to successfully seducing my foot to your ass

yukitsunoda0511: pierre !!!!!!!!!!!!

pierregasly: i am not helping you here bro

user26: someone get yuki a girlfriend before he gets his ass high kicked out of radio city

yukitsunoda0511: at this point i am just doing it to annoy them

yourusername: whatever you want to tell yourself girlypop

yukitsunoda0511: you're just scared that i'd look better than you in the costumes

yourusername: oh really?

pierregasly: okay girls there's enough pierre to go around

pierregasly: but it is all going to y/n, sorry yuki

yukitsunoda0511: you're scared you'll find things out about yourself

pierregasly: is it time to go home yet y/n ???

user27: fuck george vs max i need y/n vs yuki

user28: instead of crash threats it's just yuki threatening to steal rockette outfits

user29: surely there's someone who can make this happen? @f1 @yourusername

yourusername: noooooooo chance

yukitsunoda0511: cough, cough SCARED

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen and 303,277 others

tagged: pierregasly

yourusername: heard my frenchie missed me <3

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user30: my god they're so cute

user31: i love when a man is so shameless about his love

user32: the matching outfits !!!!!!!

charles_leclerc: thanks charles!

charles_leclerc: you're a great friend

charles_leclerc: you're an amazing person who knows us so well and DOESN'T try and seduce one of us

charles_leclerc: how can we ever repay you

charles_leclerc: oh well, no worries guys i love you

yourusername: nurse he's out again

charles_leclerc: i'm giving you ten seconds before i lose my shit

yourusername: i jest !!! thank you for bringing my lover boy to me charles

pierregasly: thank you charlooooo i guess all my complaining was worth it, i'll make sure to keep it up

charles_leclerc: no no no no no no no No No No NO NO NO NO

user33: charles got major friend points for reuniting them (after like a week away from each other lol) and now will be stuck with pierre complaining full time

alexalbon: and this kids, is why we're not nice to each other

user34: the grid being so done with pierre is so funny

charles_leclerc: the change from him being a slut to a lover boy is too much for my head

pierregasly: can we tell radio city to push back your performances to the second week of december so we don't have to be apart

yourusername: babe i don't think i'm important enough to be making those kind of demands

pierregasly: I THINK YOU'RE IMPORTANT ENOUGH

yourusername: thank you baby but being a rockette is my dream so you'll have to deal with a couple weeks without me

pierregasly: so you don't miss me :(

yourusername: you're on my mind all the time, i love you xx

pierregasly: i love you more xx

pierregasly

liked by charles_leclerc, lewishamilton and 673,298 others

tagged: yourusername

pierregasly: only two more races until i can become a full time christmas wag xx

view all comments

user37: the grid are so cute 🥰

user38: the way y/n's dressing room was full of flowers omg she's so loved

user39: the videos of them just being flabbergasted by the show, so personal to me

yourusername: thank you all for coming to see the show !! i promise everyone else were a lot less chill about you guys being there than they let off

pierregasly: no thank YOU for being the star you are 🌟

yourusername: ugh i love you so much

yourusername: are qatar and abu dhabi really that important?

pierregasly: unfortunately they are :( (i am also contractually obligated to be there)

yourusername: boooooooooooooo

alpinef1: but we're paying him to buy you christmas presents

yourusername: ... okay i guess

user40: christmas came early with all this grid content

user41: this is what i wanted from drive to survive not the fabricated drama

yukitsunoda0511: although i still think i'd look better in the costumes... i don't think i'd slay the high kicks like you y/n :(

yourusername: i'll take it !

yukitsunoda0511: but you guys will let me come to the milan house in the new year right?

yourusername: you'll have to ask pierre ...

yukitsunoda0511: PIERRE PLEASE

pierregasly: i guess... only if you stop saying you're prettier than my girlfriend. NO ONE IS PRETTIER THAN HER

yourusername: that's crazy coming from the handsomest man in the world

charles_leclerc: let's not get too crazy here y/n

yourusername: look who isn't getting a christmas present this year now ...

charles_leclerc: i mean last year you gave me a "this candle smells like max verstappen" and a max cardboard cutout

maxverstappen1: sounds like a great gift to me ...

pierregasly: well the presents she gets me are great

charles_leclerc: i don't want to know about those presents

user42: even christmas isn't free from them being horn dogs

yourusername: why do you think i learnt to high kick babe ....

charles_leclerc: shut THE FUCK UP

pierregasly: heheheheeh

fin.

note: oh gosh it's been a busy busy busy week. i haven't written for pierre for like a year lol - enjoy!

[communistkenobi]

Wrt your posting about the jedi taking on children, I disagree thst the argument about force sensitive people 'need' to be trained for everyone else's safety. It's like Dragon Age mages or BNHA quirks, it's not special if someone can fireball me if they're having a bad day, some random person can already beat or strangle me with just their own two hands in the real world, no fireball necessary.

I mean idk I feel like Star Wars does a fairly decent job of establishing how dangerous force sensitivity can be - it’s not just extra strength or throwing things, but also mind control, healing (which i know is rare tbf), communicating with animals, etc. It also establishes how scary it can be to have those sorts of powers without knowing how to deal with them. I think Rebels does a good job of exploring this kind of thing with Kanan and Ezra.

However I also agree with you that it doesn’t “need” to be a problem, like force users are not inherently doomed to darkness/violence unless trained eternally across all space and time. But I think force sensitivity introduces a wholly organic way to accrue power (both physically in the sense that you’re more powerful and socially in that you have a type of organic ‘capital’ that can be used to gain social and political power in society, either because people adore you and want to follow you, and/or because they fear you), and having that type of power isn’t dependent on class position or family history*, it’s essentially random chance if someone is force sensitive or not. Which creates a threat to the types of societies depicted in Star Wars where there are durable ruling classes who want to maintain power.

And I think the Jedi Order offers a solution to this problem by capturing that type of ‘organic capital’ for lack of a better term; you monopolise an institution responsible for moulding force sensitive people into a particular type of subject - one that is not a threat to the prevailing societal order - and in exchange for being forced to be a Jedi you get massive amounts of privilege via access to knowledge, social status, material needs, and so on. While this creates civil unrest and distrust of the Jedi from a lot of laypeople, it’s a pretty sweet deal in the eyes of the Republic if it means not having to deal with rival force sensitive groups using their power to make political demands, especially through violence.

I think looking at it this way explains why the Jedi don’t really accept or allow any other type of force user, especially as they become more enmeshed with the Republic (the coven in the acolyte is a good example, the dathomiri witches, etc), and why a lot of force users who are not Jedi are labelled Sith, either because they adopt that label themselves or because they’re labelled that by the Jedi. And I’m not saying “the sith are just misunderstood victims” or whatever, but that in a scenario where you have a very powerful monastic order that controls how the rest of society understands and interacts with force sensitivity, force users who fall outside of that are going to be treated as a criminal class who are a threat to the republic (because they are - Maul is treated this way, Dooku and Anakin quite literally topple the Republic, etc). So like in the settings Star Wars tends to play in, force sensitivity is narratively understood as a source of incredible potential power, and capturing that power via an institution like the Order makes sure that power potential is not disruptive to prevailing society and power interests. Which is why I think the Jedi do have a fairly good rationale for taking kids and training them, even if that rationale is tied to the maintenance of the status quo - the Order’s power depends upon the maintenance of their own monopoly

*KIND OF. obviously some of the canon loves doing blood lineages with palpatine and shit, the midichlorian thing, etc. which sucks so bad. But general canon consensus as far as I know appears to be that anyone can potentially be force sensitive

[xf-cases-solved]

S2E6: Ascension

Case: Part two of our three part (+ one fever dream) arc begins with a very Will Graham-esque "this is my design" bit with Mulder visiting Scully's apartment, which has now become a crime scene. (Ik X-Files predates Hannibal, it's just what it reminded me of, leave me alone. Plus, Red Dragon predates X-Files by over a decade, soooo) 

Anyway, Scully has been kidnapped by Duane Barry, oopsie daisy! He needs someone to take his place for the next abduction, and he has selected Scully for the job. Good thing Mulder and Krycek are on the case and manage to get her home safe and sound before the end credits roll!

Or... maybe actually they do the opposite of that.

Mulder gets progressively scruffier throughout the episode and nearly kills himself and Krycek on the road bc he hasn't been sleeping since Scully got kidnapped; Scully loses her necklace for the first, but CERTAINLY not last time; Mulder and Krycek take a couple's vacation to a ski resort and Mulder holds a tram operator at gunpoint for suggesting that the tram is "not safe"; Krycek messes up his carefully slicked back hair while pistol whipping the tram operator and then fails to murder Mulder in what may or may not end up being just one of many assassination failures in his pathetic assassin career; Scully is taken by "THEM!" (whoever they are); Duane Barry is dead and the military performs the autopsy bc "there wasn't an FBI pathologist available this morning" (☹️); and Assistant Director Skinner apparently has had the power to reopen the X-Files this whole time??

Does someone die in the cold open: No, but Mulder does do the worst consoling job ever by approaching Scully's mom with Scully's blood on his outstretched hand and then staring blankly at her when she asks where her daughter is.

Does Mulder present a slideshow: This man should not be operating any sort of heavy machinery be it a car, a tram, or an early 1990s projector. (Of the three, though, the only one he doesn't operate during this episode is the projector.)

Does the evidence survive the investigation: Loooool. Nah. Scully's gone, Duane Barry is dead, Krycek has disappeared, and Mulder is left with nothing but some overgrown stubble, scruffy hair, and a worsening of his already substantial insomnia problem.

Whodunit: THEM!!! (Aliens? The shadow government? Both? Neither? Who's to say?)

Convictions: Oh hon. You had to have known Duane Barry was never getting out of this alive, right?

Did they solve it: I am going to go with "no, but." No, but Mulder (and Skinner) are at least aware that they have been massively screwed over, and so Skinner reopens the X-Files in retaliation, and I'll consider that a leveling up. You may have lost all your evidence, almost got framed for murder (tho tbf you did strangle the shit out of him), and got your only real friend in the world abducted by aliens/the shadow government/THEM, but at least you got your special files back, Mulder! I'm sure the first X-Files case you take on after their reopening will be very important, and not one that is just a fourteen year old emo kid's wet/fever dream fantasy...

But, ah, you know what? I'm getting ahead of myself. Ad break! 

[how do i determine if a case is solved? check the scale here: x]

THIS EPISODE IS SPONSORED BY: Quitting your job and disconnecting your home phone number. Are you currently leading a double life, pretending to be someone you're not in order to gain the trust of someone you intend to royally fuck over for your bosses in the shadow government? Have you completed your mission and are ready to move onto bigger and better* things? Well, then that means it's time for you to try quitting your job and disconnecting your home phone number! Don't worry, it's the 90s, you don't have a cell phone with a tracker on it, nobody will be able to find you. Go live your life, free as a bird. I mean, at least for now... *We do not guarantee that the things you move onto will be bigger, and we CERTAINLY don't guarantee that the things you move onto will be better. In fact, they might be worse. There's actually a high likelihood that they will indeed be worse. But don't worry about that right now. Everything is going to be probably possibly maybe just fine.

***

General Total Stats:

(green means stat has changed since last ep; red means new stat added to list)

Total Cases *Definitively* Solved So Far: 15 (streak not broken bc i didn't bother to restart it in the first place 👉🏽😎👉🏽)

Total Number of "Mulder/Scully, It's Me": 9 (teeeechnically she does say "mulder, it's me" in this episode, but it's the same one from the end of the previous episode, so counting it felt like cheating)

Total Number of Times Scully Has Conveniently Not Seen Something Crucial: 6

Total Number of Times Mulder Has Been in Mortal Danger: 10 ½ (if only krycek were competent 😔) 

Total Number of Times Scully Has Been in Mortal Danger: 10 (i think as long as we don't know her whereabouts it's valid to consider her as being in mortal danger)

Total Number of Sexually Charged, Uncomfortably Intimate, and/or Flirty Moments Between Friendly Coworkers: 15 (mulder climbing a hill and staring longingly at the sky is so insanely melodramatic that i'm counting it)

Total Number of Autopsies Scully Has Performed On Screen: 5 (ngl the line "there wasn't an fbi pathologist available this morning" hits the feels a bit)

Total Number of Times Scully Plays Doctor: 2

Total Number of Times Mulder Talks to an Informant: 19!! (and he was extremely unhelpful 😃)

Total Number of Times People Making Out in a Car Are Hurt or Killed: 2

Total Number of Times Someone Correctly Guesses a Password: 3 

Total Number of (Plot Relevant) Nosebleeds: 5

Total Number of Times Mulder Has Tasted/Sniffed/Touched Something Questionable Without Following Proper Safety Procedures: 3 (no, but he did completely ignore all warnings in regards to using the unstable tram thing, which is similar in spirit, if not in practice)

Total Number of Times Someone Says "Trust No One": 3 

Total Number of Times Someone Says "I Want to Believe": 4 

Total Number of Times Someone Says "The Truth is Out There": 2 

Total Number of Cigarettes Cigarette Smoking Man Has Smoked: 13 (but he NEVER. FUCKING. FINISHES THEM. look at that fucking ashtray at the end of the episode. he takes like one drag and then puts them out. why? why not smoke the whole thing?? drives me insane)

Total Number of Maggie Scully Sightings: 2! (she's not having a good time!)

Total Number of Lone Gunmen Sightings: 2

Total Number of Alex Krycek Sightings: 3!!!!!! (get outta town, rat boy! no, seriously, get outta town. we'll call you when we need you to fuck something up later)

Total Number of Times I Had to Look Up What State the Episode Takes Place in Even Though I Literally Just Watched It: 11½ (ascend to the stars, mother fucker)

Total Number of Times I Had to Look at an Episode's Wikipedia Page to Fill This Out Because It Was Fucking Confusing and/or Too Boring for Me to Pay Attention: 5

[paperandhis-paper]

Arc-V Month Day 11: Legacy for the Future

(Is that a motherfucking Jojo reference?)

Ok, so, I've spent most days of @arcvmonth so far gushing about the show, so warning: negativity ahead.

I'm overall mixed on the Legacy characters. I don't think they ruin the show as some people claim, but I happen to have problems with... all of them? There are also positives, ofc, so ANALYSIS TIME!

Crow: he's... fine. His screentime is fine. His role in the plot is fine. Everything about him is just fine. My only real complaint is that I wished Shun had won and gotten another duel with Yuya, but it's whatever. He's really only part of the Lancers because he's a legacy character, as I don't think he's the most interesting Synchro character.

Jack: by far the best Legacy character, Jack somewhat takes the role of rival from Reiji, down to having 3 duels with the protagonist and a 3000 ATK ace. Giving him the role of a mentor is an interesting take on the character, although it was weird going back to 5D's I don't know how people feel about him beating Sergey (I know some people hated that when the episode was first announced), but somehow it works fine? It's an interesting subversion, because you'd think Yuya would be the one to do so, but instead Yuya's role is to be the one to unite the people together. My only problem is that it's... kinda weird that Jack just lets the City remain a shithole. Like, do something my man! I also wonder if Yusei wouldn't have been more fitting for his role, but I understand they didn't want to have the protagonists so Yuya wouldn't be overshadowed.

Kaito: I never cared for Kaito in Zexal (granted, it's been a long while since I've seen it), and Arc-V Kaito has similar issues. Namely, being a bit too powerful. He never has a solo loss, and here's where being a legacy character begins to hurt. He had a reputation for being unbeatable (Tron cheating aside), so the writers know they can't have him lose easily. He even almost beats Yuya! The best thing about him is that he provides a mirror for Shun; he's basically edgy-bird Shun from the beginning, but in some ways worse. He steals spotlight a fair bit, but his most egregious case of this is to another Legacy Character, so whatever.

Speaking of...

Asuka: done dirty, and so unnecessarily. Seriously, let her duel Dennis! Him vs Kaito isn't a TERRIBLE set-up, but she needed a big win so her presence doesn't just feel like fanservice. Her getting carded also sucks, but I get the writers kinda had to (can't have a Ritual duelist face Zarc, after all), plus it gave Yuri some much-needed depth.

But at least she got a win, even if it was against mooks. Unlike...

Edo: oh boy. See, I don't actually have much issues with his arc. It works, so long as you ignore that it has basically nothing to do with Edo's character in GX. No, what I wanna talk about this is his duel with Yuya.

I'm gonna be blunt: he should've won that duel. For one, he didn't get a single win in the series (tbf, his opponents were strong, but still), but most importantly, earlier on we saw with Kaito vs Shun that even if you lose you can still reach your opponent. And Edo got development himself by accepting Entertainment Dueling and grabbing an Action Card. The fact that Yuya wins by grabbing an Action Card of his own just rubs salt on the wound. Plus, I just like the idea of Yuya never beating an arc villain (other than Zarc, sorta), his role instead being another (then again, I guess then people would use that to claim Yuya is a weak protagonist and whatnot, so maybe it was for the best).

Also, both him and Kaito interrupting Yugo and Yuri's duel is dumb. Saving that rant for later.

So yeah. Legacy Characters were a mixed bag. I think the writers struggled with giving them the prominence they deserved without outshining Arc-V's massive cast. That's a very fine line. But hey— we got Legacy Support! That's always a good thing, right?

[somecunttookmyurl]

gonna need you to elaborate on those 'famous people you've met' tags, queen. like what. what is your life.

god sorry this has probably been here all day but i’ve been belting out chicago songs all morning (the musical not the band) @scimmymunkeh can verify that my life, especially from like 2009-2014 (before i moved to scotland) was like. so weird.

in my misspent youth i travelled around the UK and europe seeing The Horrors just like. so many times. they were cheap enough to follow around on tour and i like travelling so that’s what i did. and i’m sufficiently not weird (lmao, i know right) as a person that i got to know them decently well (mostly rhys, tbf) so a some of it happened from that. side note - this actually gained me an honest to god real life stalker from tumblr who also lived in london and would like... see me out at the weekend and then send me anons about what i was doing? very weird time. anyway.

alex turner & miles kane - would go to cave club (a night ran primarily by rhys monthly) sometimes and because i am, again, not A Weirdo i’d be chilling with them. mostly miles, bc alex is pretty shy actually. but for some reason i truly do not know like don’t ask i have no idea every time miles and i got drunk we’d make plans to... buy... a pig? and raise it together? i think we were going to call it penny or peggy or something idk. quite what our plans were for co-parenting a FUCKING PIG in LONDON when we didn’t even live together were but. we really wanted to get a pig for some reason. technically i’ve also met alexa chung (this was WAY BACK when she was still dating alex) but she was deeply sus of any woman in his vicinity so just. left that one alone.

peaches geldof - was dating/later married a guy called thomas who was in a band called S.C.U.M. that rhys’ little brother was in. due to them being around all the time (also they were good listen to them) thomas and i knew each other. we weren’t friends or anything - mostly i was pals with sammy seven - but knew each other to talk to each other. something peaches apparently had a massive problem with because every time she saw me she’d shoot daggers at me across the room like oh my GOD i cannot express enough that i’m not interested in tom. chill. anyway she’s dead now.

i forgot about bobby gilespie (primal scream) and lou hayter (new young pony club) who also used to hang out at the cave.

adam ant - the first time i met him was at a 60s night. like literally an event called ‘le beat bespoke’. he was just... there? for some reason? i dunno. had a drink and a smoke with him. nice man. LITERALLY 2 weeks later on my actual 20th birthday i was at a night called ‘stay beautiful’ which was a heavily-manics-inspired regular event ran by music journalist simon price... adam ant turned up and did a ranom guerilla performance. which??? anyway he recognised me and we hung out for a bit again. he was VERY manic and off his meds at the time (adam ant is bipolar). invited me back to his hotel, nudge nudge wink, but uh. did not do that. as funny as “i boned adam ant once” would be as a story in my life............... no. dude’s old enough to be my dad. haven’t seen him since, just weird that it happened twice so close together in a city of 9 million people.

damon albarn - there was a very bizarre period of maybe 3-4 months where every time i went out i bumped into damon. like literally. every event i attended he was there. again, city of 9 million people, and we lived on opposite sides of it. permanently drunk, and asked me for a lighter every single time he saw me even though (at the time) i wasn’t smoking. at one point i bumped into him at waterloo train station like “okay that’s it i have to leave the city. i can never go outside again. this is getting fucking weird”. haven’t seen him since, either. on a related note i’ve met paul simeon as well.

richard oakes (suede) - saw suede a bunch of times and as one of the few people who love and appreciate richard oakes i always spoke to him and he was really excited about it and would remember the smallest details. had a backstage pass to a show in paris once. richard also has a side project called artmagic that i’ve seen and no matter how many years pass, he still recognises me and will run over like an excited puppy. met his parents twice, who are lovely people.

simon gilbert (suede) - similar but less dramatic, but will add fans on personal facebook if he’s seen you often enough bc he’s a lovely guy.

obviously i’ve also hung out with the rest of suede but didn’t interact with them as much. it’s mostly me x richard brotp 4eva.

sean patrick flanery (actor, boondock saints/mongolian death worm) - i made a joke about his hair being stuck in the 90s on twitter once and he’s followed me ever since which is at this point LITERALLY YEARS i really don’t understand.

[punkscowardschampions]

Liam & Edie

Liam: [a picture of Rio with her eyes crossed out like 1. Miss you and 2. Guess who I just talked to]

Edie: ofc she did 😑

Edie: what’s the damage

Liam: 0 to us I deflected the - to Lexie

Liam: do you want her framed for jumpscaring herself or is there anyone else

Edie: That’s all she cared about?

Edie: Bitch

Liam: it just didn’t take no time to convince her we’re perfect for each other

Liam: bc we are

Edie: yeah we are 🥰

Edie: surprised she copped to anything of the sort though

Edie: clearly can’t resist being nice to you

Edie: Lexie needs to calm down

Edie: 🤔 I mean, be kinda fucking hilarious if everyone reckoned she was doing it to herself

Edie: but maybe I’ve been too mean already 🥺

Edie: what do you think?

Liam: I think it’s pretty close to showing everyone her true colours if we do, Lex has gotta have been talking to your sister about me, I could tell, she thought I was a dick before I talked her round

Edie: She wouldn’t be happy for me unless you were a total 🤓 with no dick

Edie: that’s just what she’s like, crazy

Edie: but also not a stretch to see Lexie being a gossipy cow, I’ve heard her on other people before so

Edie: why would I give a fuck if her life is ruined

Liam: she basically accused me of wanting to hit you up for one reason and then wanting to immediately dip, if she thinks that’s what I’m like that’s only coming from one person

Edie: She’s pathetic

Edie: it’s clearly her saying it because you didn’t sleep with her

Edie: it wouldn’t be hard to spoof some shit, make it look like her

Edie: and she has nothing to say it was me, or you like she thought, and it weren’t no one else so she’s fucked, basically

Liam: [send her some shit that you’ve already started to work on because you knew she’d agree with this plan and the bits of the Rio convo where you said you’d try and find out and made it sound like you thought it was her but obvs it couldn’t possibly be hehe]

Edie: You’re so smart

Edie: She deserves this, she was definitely bitching about you, you can tell from how hard Rih said she weren’t

Liam: don’t be upset with me, but I was thinking about how Lexie also deserves to see us together and you happy and I invited them both to your show

Liam: you did say you want your family to take your music seriously

Edie: I’m not mad

Edie: You invited Rih too so she isn’t going to think you’re trying to get back with her

Edie: and I get to rub that and the fact I’m talented in her face?

Edie: It’s a good idea, baby

Liam: still, if you wanna create me in game and spend your time testing out different murder options, I won’t be mad, I should’ve asked you if it was a good idea before saying yeah to having us all there

Edie: [an 8-bit Liam but obvs we’re making an 8-bit us to smooch him not murder him, a lil gif moment of this or whatever it would be]

Liam: you only want a play through where we 👩🏼‍❤️‍👨🏻

Edie: that might make the thread 🤮 but idk if they’d be 😱

Liam: we’ll keep it off thread

Liam: [send her the floor plan to where your dad lives/holiday cottages so she can build it in sims like my boo would, live your dreams kids]

Edie: don’t need to make 50k nerds jealous, I get you

Edie: [just nerd out with that]

Edie: I’ll show you how generic the 👶 is

Edie: very rude

Liam: if the mods and cc don’t fix it, I’ll pretend I don’t 👀

Edie: the 👀 are already insane colours

Liam: no match for yours in real life

Edie: [pics forever]

Edie: [obviously also make your enemies to actually kill and send that]

Liam: if you sent it to Lexie nobody’d believe she created herself looking that accurate

Edie: harsh reality of a sim

Edie: the alpha CC does look like her facetune attempts, tbf

Liam: at least you can make her try to seduce the grim reaper instead of me

Edie: she’ll have ample opportunity to meet him

Edie: [all the dramatic deaths cut with her sim when they get hysterical]

Edie: I’m still mad at her

Edie: Rih blatantly thinking it was me too, not surprising but still 🖕

Edie: how’s it been today

Liam: only bc she knows how smart you are and most people who Lex hangs out with ain’t, I barely had to cover for you so she don’t really wanna think it

Edie: story of her life

Liam: how 😡 are you

Edie: it’s exhausting being mad at her, there’s nothing to do

Edie: people like Lexie, you can fuck with, or care even less than that

Liam: would it make you feel better to fuck with Lexie more

Edie: I wanna make you feel better more

Edie: you must be feeling as bored and crazy as me, if not more

Liam: if I could feel anything it’d be 💔 you’re not happy or here

Edie: is it worse

Edie: nothing

Edie: maybe that’s stupid

Edie: nothing seems preferable sometimes but only sometimes, which is maybe what takes it over feeling too much

Liam: it’s isolating, everyone expects me to feel too much, that’s acceptable, even years after

Edie: acceptance would be easier

Edie: you have me

Edie: no matter what

Edie: idc if no one else gets me, you do

Liam: I dunno what it says about people that they’d be happy if I was going round punching holes in walls but I know my ma would

Liam: she looks at me like she’s waiting for it, watching for a massive crack or something

Edie: they’ve got their reason, they want the reaction

Edie: then they can link a and b and ???

Edie: problem solved, not really

Edie: but they understand it and can wash their hands of you

Edie: that’s what they give a shit about

Liam: yeah

Edie: enough sympathy and hot meals dropped off and you’ll be ‘fixed’

Edie: you weren’t even the sick one

Liam: get enough hobbies, a part-time job, a girlfriend, move the fuck on

Edie: right

Edie: it’s so

Edie: I can’t think of the word

Liam: “she’d want you to be happy/have a life” no she fucking wouldn’t, she wanted it for herself

Edie: dead people get sainted

Edie: no room for who they actually were, better and worse

Liam: she’d hate me having any of those things just to rub in her face

Edie: what was she like, between being sick

Liam: I’ll show you

Edie: do you reckon she’d want you to remember what she’d want for you then, instead of how she was at the end

Edie: not to be like every other cunt about it

Edie: not that simple, or at all

Liam: she was a teenage girl, she’d probably want me to do more fitting in too until I’ve completed the coming of age shite milestones everyone else is, instead of telling other teenage girls from the internet how fucked up I am 😏

Edie: I think that might be a milestone so 👏

Edie: the bullshit of your sister not having her own life to live dealt with then, in this scenario

Edie: we have to find what you want

Edie: even if that’s not 🤵👧🐶🧒👰 with me

Edie: not gonna be Lexie about it, you know

Edie: I’ll still help you find it

Liam: I want you, not to be gay about it

Liam: to see where this is gonna go, how far I can take it before it ends

Edie: then let’s do it

Edie: what can I do today

Liam: what would you be doing if you could do anything

Edie: that’s the problem

Edie: I wanna be with you

Edie: but I don’t know what we’d do yet

Liam: I said I’d show you what my sister was like, the quickest way to do it is to act like nothing matters, your behaviour has no consequences

Liam: it’s not about me at all, only what you want, what’s gonna happen

Edie: and I can’t hurt you

Edie: because you don’t feel anything yet, yeah?

Liam: you can’t hurt me

Edie: you promise

Edie: do that and then we can do what I want

Liam: how do you want me to promise

Edie: 🤏🩸

Edie: mine is 📫

Liam: [brb father he’s gotta go draw some blood and put it into something she can wear as jewellery like Angelina Jolie and record the endeavour to send to the bae]

Edie: [that’s exactly what we gonna send, I know you can legit buy them so I’ll find a cool pic tah, his poor father so confusion]

Liam: [great minds boo]

Edie: kiss it better for me

Liam: [send her another video boy we’re in this deep]

Edie: god

Edie: okay, what do you do to relieve stress, let go and let off steam

Edie: do that

Liam: what do I do or what should you, bc I have an idea that I think would make you feel better about your sister

Edie: you can start by telling me what I should do because I’m intrigued

Liam: she said she’d lose it at Lexie if she did anything to you, if you lower your IQ by at least 100 you could have fun trashing her room but making it look like she did it herself to frame you, you’d have to wait til she was forced out with her family and bc there’s no check in or selfie proof everyone would just think they’re covering for her, but that’d be the only boring bit

Liam: your sister would feel bad for falling for it and believing you might be involved at all

Edie: I definitely don’t want to see her at mine ever again

Edie: I’ll do it

Edie: Bet she has a shrine to you

Liam: a curse would explain me being dead inside

Edie: she has no ✨

Edie: so whilst I’m ripping the heads off all her 🧸s

Edie: you’ve gotta do…

Liam: 🏊 the only thing there is to do

Edie: your da didn’t come prepared? 🔥🪓

Liam: he’d be prepared with a 🧯 more like but I don’t need his help 🔥🪓

Edie: you should see if anyone is around, like anywhere

Edie: see how easy it is to 👀 them without getting caught

Liam: it’s like you know me inside out

Edie: I do

Edie: I’ve got X-Ray 👀s

Liam: next time you miss me you can do an artistic rendering

Edie: of all your vital organs

Edie: not to kill the mystery and show myself up as a fake fan on the forums

Edie: but I think the outside view of you is a lot prettier 😳🥰

Liam: ok I’ll not send you any in the 📫

Edie: only the non-vitals, tah 😏

Liam: what’s left Alexis hasn’t got in her shrine

Edie: she 🥺 so hard you gave her your gallbladder

Liam: 10% risk of shitting myself side effects after it’s gone, 100% chance of that putting her off wanting to jump me, I’d do it

Edie: no need to do that now I’m here

Edie: no one is gonna wanna jump her when she’s outed as 😵🥴🤡

Liam: I’ll keep the scalpel sharp for lads who wanna get with you when they realise you’re 🤩🤓😎😇😈

Edie: I’m not complaining

Edie: I only want you around, ever

Liam: I’ll be going nowhere without you ever when I get back

Edie: Good

Edie: because I feel like

Edie: it’s like I’m doing so much to fill my time but I still just think about and miss you constantly

Liam: I’ll climb a tree and call you from the top

Edie: Describe your view the best you can

Edie: like I’m there too

Liam: facetime’ll make you feel like you are

Edie: not quite VR but I’ll take it

Edie: talking to you feels like our own 🪐 anyway

Liam: [do climb a tree and call her because what a mood just like you’re Elizabeth Allen]

Edie: [save that tree henny]

Liam: [do we wanna skip to his bday now or is there anything else you can think of that you wanna do while he’s still away?]

Edie: [hmm, we probably know the vibe, she’s busy with all the things they’re gonna continue when he’s back, also finding the first house they can break into and stay in, fucking with Lexie loads more]

Liam: [yeah and if we do think of anything specific later we can skip back it’s chill]

Edie: [let’s do it]

[silver-wield]

FF7R: Cloud’s hyper vigilance

Since this has come up a few times in the last couple of days I figured I'd stick it all in one place so everyone can see just how differently Cloud behaved pre and post sim cut scene.

Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who haven’t played – do I still need to do this? Eh ok, (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and it’s gonna be long.

Also, this is one person’s interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree that’s cool and we’ll agree to disagree.

You’re also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, I’m grabbing them from Youtube and it’s frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want. Idk why they’re blurry or different sizes this time, so sorry about that and just bear with me.

Please check my master post to see if I've already covered your question, thanx

Let's mosey!

Before Cloud sees the love of his life run through by Sephiroth, he is attentive towards her, which we already knew, but he wasn't overly attentive. He looked to her to make sure she was ok, but he trusted that she'd be ok without him watching her every move.

Cloud turns his head only. Before that he was facing forward and not turned towards Tifa. He looks at her when they're talking, but doesn't move his entire body. Tbf, this is the part where Tifa fell 30+ft and said she thought she'd die for sure, which likely put Cloud in a more attentive state towards her anyway, but after that came the stairs or elevator, so he probably calmed down again. There's no threats between that moment and the sim, so he shouldn't feel the need to become overprotective towards Tifa. Seeing threats everywhere when there aren't any is a very bad sign, so it's a good thing Cloud didn't change after that first event.

Tifa gets stabbed and Cloud's reaction is heartbreaking. He doesn't know it's not real at this point. This is genuine shock and grief. He's failed her. There's no undoing this. The look on his face as he tries to locate Sephiroth is murderous. It morphs into shock when he sees Barret dead, too. He's let them both down.

This is during the talk with Hart before they leave the sim. Cloud was literally just facing Tifa talking to her. He knows she's there. He has no reason to check on her again, other than he's worried what'll happen if he can't see her.

Not even in the office yet. They're in the archive and Tifa's just moved forward to look around and Cloud has turned so they're lined up. He's obviously still shaken by the sim and feels the need to keep her within reach in case she needs saving.

In the office and Cloud again half turns so that he is more in line with Tifa's position. Why does Cloud feel threatened during this point? Because he doesn't know Domino and it could be a trap. Common sense he wants to keep an eye on the person he wants to keep alive.

Things only escalate from this point. The degree by which Cloud turns depends on how stressed/worried he is at that point. He doesn't know Hart or Domino, but he's less threatened than in later locations, so doesn't feel as much pressure to keep Tifa within arm's reach, which explains why the degree he turns by is less than other times.

During the atrium section, Cloud seems to relax a little. The threat reduces for him and he begins to lower his hyper vigilance towards Tifa. The sim event seems like he was overreacting maybe and he doesn't have to keep as close an eye on her. It was all just messing with his head and he needs to focus. Soldier Cloud gets him back on mission.

But that's when he suffers a different kind of stressful event that pushes him to a breaking point and he cries. 

Cloud's stress levels begin rising again with the introduction of Hojo to the mix. He withdraws into himself, but even then he keeps some of his focus on Tifa's position. We can see here he is turned towards her, which accomplishes two goals. He's made himself a smaller target for Hojo, but also he can leap towards Tifa more easily if something happens.

It's during this event that Cloud has given up his position as leader. Barret takes control of the dialogue and later during the drum he gives Cloud orders, which are followed without argument. Cloud is doing the bare minimum needed to interact with people. He's focused on his goals. Protect Tifa. Save Aerith. Anything else is getting ignored.

Aerith's room after Cloud's collapse and you can see he's lined up with Tifa again, while talking to Aerith. It's even more obvious in the close up before this, but since Tifa wasn't visible I chose the longer shot because Cloud doesn't move from that shot to this and I'm not in the mood to deal with anyone trying to say I'm imagining things. I'm not.

This is even more obvious. Cloud is standing behind Tifa, lined up with her. On purpose. He moved to this position before we got control of him back. He's just gone through a very stressful event with the Jenova thing and he's not in a good head space in general. Focusing on Tifa may well be a comfort thing for him as well. If he focuses on her then he doesn't have to think about himself.

After reuniting with the girls and checking in with them, Cloud reorients his body to Tifa's position. The drum is one massive threat and Cloud's living through his nightmares with the medical room and the experiments. The last thing he wants is for something to happen to Tifa under his nose.

Right after the above screen we see he's once again lined up with her position before control comes back to us.

Lined up with Tifa's position again. I really don't have much else to say about this. It's all highlighting Cloud's anxiety after seeing her die in front of him. If he keeps her in line with himself then he can save her.

And again, Cloud turns to where Tifa is. There's other people around, but he's only speaking to her. Only looking at her. She is his priority at this point. The others are along for the ride.

Now, I'm sure someone will try and point out that she's the one driving the truck, but that doesn't explain why he's only talking to her and doesn't include the others. He was facing front until a moment before he spoke. He could've raised his voice to include everyone in a general “let's go” way, but he chose to turn to Tifa and speak to her exclusively.

And turns to her again. This is actually the third time he turns to check on her position, but the times before that were glances back because the threat was in front of them (Sephiroth). He didn't need to turn and check on her because he was already in the ideal position to save her.

After the arbiter battle, when they're in that between place which has something to do with CC with its sky and water imagery, we see Tifa walk into Cloud's peripheral vision and him turn towards her to check she's ok. He only turns away when he asks Aerith a question.

Last scene of the game and even though Cloud is talking to the others and his head is turned towards them, his body is lined up exactly with Tifa's position.

In conclusion.

I know some of yall are gonna be awww he loves her so much he can't bear to let her out of his sight. Yeah, ok, you're right, but at the same time, Cloud is very anxious. He's become that worried about Tifa's safety that he can't help but keep her in view at all times. The only time he's not focused on her is when there's an actual threat he needs to deal with because then he knows where the problem is and how to take care of it. It's during those moments between threats that he's become hyper vigilant towards her, even more than he was before he thought she died.

Before the sim, he was attentive, but trusted she could deal with most problems. He figured either she could handle it or he'd get there in time.

After the sim, he still trusts her, but he doesn't trust himself to keep her safe, which is why he's become even more watchful towards her.

I’m guessing this is gonna go towards his eroding sense of identity through the rest of the game until he shatters and we get the lifestream event where Tifa puts him back together again.

[berrysphase]

Nirvana in Fire rewatch liveblog part 19

Ep. 42, off to camp

Ahh, it's painful to hear real emotion in Banruo's voice at last when she's talking to Prince Yu, to finally see that dimension of her, and to know it's there only because of his parentage. She is using her genuine emotions just as scientifically as MCS uses his. That sideways half smile when she pulls the pouch out; that is so great. It is so painful and so classically tragic watching Prince Yu step inevitably down to his own destruction, ah, this scene.

“I just wanted to choose the most virtuous candidate,” says the emperor. AUGH YOU GIANT BLIND HYPOCRITE

Man, one classical tragedy interleaved with one another -- the emperor goes on to say, wearily, “you reap what you sow” -- he means this about himself and not just Prince Yu, I suspect, but strictly with respect to his dubious decision to carry on an affair with Princess Linglong. But, in general: ow*. I am continuously amazed at how carefully the cuts between scenes are constructed. Side by side we get to see what the revelation of Yu's Hua heritage means for both Prince Yu and the emperor, and (1) this makes Prince Yu's family issues pop out in exquisitely painful bas-relief, and (2) the way it's done parallels the self-destructive arcs of these characters, letting Prince Yu's more obvious, action-y, onscreen arc pull out the Emperor's more subtle one; “everyone says Prince Yu, of all the princes, is the most like me,” the Emperor says here wearily, and yes, yes.

Aaaaa it is super interesting that Princess-Consort Yu is eavesdropping on this whole conversation

It is also super interesting that Princess Linglong's letter suggests that the Hua weren't actually conspiring with Da Yu. I would definitely, tragically, believe preemptive paranoia striking again, but this letter was also surely written with an agenda; I love the Rashomon aspect of all this.

That moment when Prince Yu bridles his emotions; that is so good. I mean, it's terrible, I weep for him, but it's so good.

MU QING there are never enough Mu siblings in this stretch :(

spffft the side eye from Meng when Wei Zheng assures Jingyan earnestly that he will answer his questions to the best of his knowledge, ha

I don't actually have anything to say about this scene, but, ahhhh, that look on MCS' face when Jingyan declares that his exalted rank is nothing and useless unless he can give justice to the 70,000 dead, <333

“It is already too late to want to stop” -- that is such a good line. Not, “it's too late to stop” -- “it's too late to WANT to stop.” So much implied with so little. showww

(Oh hey, the bow that the Emperor shoots, is that the one that Jingyan gave him? I bet it is)

Oh, it's odd to see MCS in browns and without his usual jade hairpiece. That and his easy smile really make the past seem closer to the surface than usual. I love that Yujin teases him now, in a way that betokens genuine respect; MCS  started the show as Jingrui's friend, but he's closer to Yujin now.

And again, with Consort Jing, he knows perfectly well that she knows who he is, and he still can't bring himself to admit it. Other Chiyan survivors -- no problem; but to anyone else? acknowledging that he's anything other than the combined breath of the wronged dead, that is very hard. Lin Shu is dead, Mei Changsu is a construct, so sorry to Lin Chen who thought he was a person, end of story, I said end of story, stop >:(

(and I love so much that, at the same time, he goes and drops massive hints to Yujin.  again.  I swear he wants Yujin to find out – Yujin, who is just close enough to him to be a bright surviving link to his past world, but just far enough away to not be personally devastated by everything MCS has lost (and will still lose); not to mention Yujin is now an ally and willing co-conspirator, and pretty much everyone else on team MCS either knows already or works directly for Jingyan.)

* tbf this sentence is a reasonable summary of the entire drama.

[calliecat93]

So... I want to talk about Sarge regarding Seasons 15-17. Why? Well, I’ve talked about all the other Reds (except Lopez, lo siento amigo) so... why not? Plus I brought up on Twitter how I wanted some Sarge development that wasn’t ignored later (ignore the fact that I forgot to put ‘don’t’ in the sentence on there). What did I mean by that? Well, let’s talk about it.

S15 seemed tried to give him some development, and I think ti was mostly done well. He was still desiring to be able to fight and die heroically. He’s so engraved in military life and wants to fight something that he has zero ideas about how to function outside it. Temple gave him a fight and the structure that he was used to, so it makes sense that Sarge would fall for it. But ultimately, he cares too much for the others. Yes, even the Blues. Plus while he won’t hesitate to kill his enemies or Grif, killing civilians like Dylan and Jax is probably going too far for him. The only real issue is that he couldn’t promise that he wouldn’t betray the others again, but at the same time he did take responsibility for his actions and could at least recognize that he couldn’t make promises. And his final confrontation against Surge gave some nice closure while being as ridiculous as we would imagine. IIRC Joe was originally going to give him Vic’s subplot, which I’m glad he changed it. Going this route feels much more appropriate for Sarge imo.

But then we get to S16. The Sarge and Simmons subplot kind of highlights one big thing for me: Sarge cannot accept guilt. There was his refusal to accept fault about the Battle of Broken Ridge, even when Simmons outright pointed out why it was his fault. Which seemed like a joke... and it was. But then we get to the next episode, where Sarge wants to assassinate Temple, Why? because, in his own words, one of them betrayed their life-long friends. 

Simmons: One of us? You mean-?

Sarge: One of us!

Then there was Sarge trying to express guilt over shooting a civilian... but the s3ntence was awkward as he tried t not put the blame on himself. Then at the end, where Private John gets the role he wanted and that wouldn't have happened if Sarge didn’t try this ridiculous scheme to begin with, it looks like Sarge is about to have his epiphany... before blaming Private John and giving up. This is both interesting... and annoying. Interesting because this really highlights how much Sarge does NOT want to admit guilt for things. He can clearly recognize it since he still felt so guilty about his betrayal that he wanted to kill Temple before it ever happened to correct it. But he very clearly does NOT want to acknowledge it as much as possible. 

But then we get to the annoying bit. After Episode 5, this bit of insight is dropped completely. I mean even Simmons giving up on science was kinda still there. Not by much, but it was there. But Sarge gets his cameo role and... doesn't do much else after. At most there’s his visible concern for Wash, but that applied to everyone. It feels like there was something there... but then they realized ’oh shit, we don’t have time to do anymore’ and dropped it. And because he and the cast got shafted for the most part in S17 outside Donut and Wash, there was even less to do.

Which of course, brings us to S17 where Sarge utterly pissed me off. So it’s Episode 7. The guys remember that Donut betrayed them and Sarge essneitally wants to execute him. This feels... increidbly hypocritical. Because just two seasons ago, SARGE BETRAYED THEM TOO. Yeah, his didn’t doom the universe, but it was still a pretty massive betrayal. I know that Sarge is an asshole and all, but it really felt dickish. Maybe it was meant to be funny, but it wasn't. Grif’s anger was understandable because Donut DID cause problems with his betrayal, and he wasn't trying to have Donut blown up by Shelia.

 It really feels like the staff doesn’t know what to do with Sarge. It feels like they’re afraid to have him develop or act differently from ‘crazy drill sergeant who likes to shoot everything’ because if they do try, he won’t be Sarge anymore. Which I kinda get. For a show liek this, you don’t want to change the character too much because it risks taking away what made them likeable. We liked Sarge because he’s uttelry insane. But they were able to get him over his hate/desire to kill The Blues... well okay, he has the occasional relapse, but overall he’s past it. And that didn’t ruin his character at all. He still occasionally insults Grif, but it’s a LOT rarer nowadays, and he’s still stayed funny. You can still have him be shotgun happy AND let him say... start admitting when he is in the wrong, for example. 

Going back to the analysis though, let's talk about The Labryinth... and of all things, a PSA. The Hard Truths PSA. Why? Because both of these do bring up something interesting. And since both were written by Jason Weight, I don’t think it was just a coincidence. In the Hard Truths PSA< when he has his breakdown, he brings up how he hasn’t lead a civilian life since he was a boy and that he wouldn’t know what to do without the structure of military life. Which... makes sense, especially when you look at the PSAA. He couldn't handle retirement at all, but he could handle the structure that Temple offered him. Then we get The Labryinth, where he’s at a desk job and clearly craving the brutal military life. So he gets it... and immediately regrets it. He can’t handle brutal military life either. Sure he used to be an ODST and has been in the military since he was old enough to be. But he probably hasn’t been in the heart of a true war in a looooong time and reliving it would remind him that it’s not quite ’the good old glory days’ like he thought.

Why do I bring this up though? Well... as I’ve said multiple times it feels like they don’t know what to do with Sarge. They want to keep him as the character we all recognize, but any attempts to try and do more haven’t really gone anywhere. S15 had a little, and tbf he seemed more willing to go with normal life before they got the Time Guns. Still, it feels like they can’t figure out how to do any development without changing him. How could they develop him and not sacrifice anything going forward? Well... if we’re sticking to the idea of a lowkey season for S18...

I made a joke about doing an ‘RvB: They finally get some damn therapy’ edition... but I kinda mean it. This is a good time to do some character development and reflection after everything. So why not dig into this a little? I remember in the interview with Jason that The Shizno did, he mentioned wanting to do some Grif and Sarge bonding due to finding them similar and how Grif can try to explain some modern thing to him. That... would honestly be perfect. Especially since Grif is someone seeking structure and having Sarge maybe ramble on about the ‘good ole days’ and Grif pointing out how it was stupid could not only lead to some good comedy but some good bonding moments. Which with these two, is loooooong overdue anyways. Of course, we still have a long time before we know how things will go, but that's my proposal. Just do some talking and maybe have Sarge realize how shit he is with both civilian life and soldier life. Maybe he can find something on Chorus to do that can be a good compromise, especially if they go the Locus Trial route.

IDK. I just felt like talking about Sarge. I do like some stuff that they did with him. Like I said, his arc in S15 made a lot of sense and mostly worked. I feel like there’s plenty of insight to get off these seasons that I really enjoyed. But it’s as I said, it feels like they just... forget sometimes and again, I think it may just be because they don’t want to change Sarge and risk losing what made him... well, him. Hence why going the low-key route may help with that since there are options there. And they can keep him the crazy, shotgun-loving, one-liner spouting asshole that we know and love. Development will NOT ruin that. I think that there are some interesting possibilities. Even outside what I mentioned, Donut’s left and Simmons isn’t a kissass to him anymore. I remember this meta post that talked about Sarge’s feelings about his boys outgrowing him... and it is really insightful and something I’d like to see explored. But only time will tell, dirtbags!

[gattsuru]

Renewable power tends to fall into one of two categories:

Having strong limits to max uptime.  Solar power works when the sun is out (and at the right angle), wind based on where the wind is blowing, tidal only for certain blocks each day.

Having very strong limits to max capacity, like geothermal or hydroelectric.  If you’ve got a great site for this stuff it makes a ton of sense to use it!  But you can’t just produce a good hydroelectric site out of thin air.

((In practice, this is a continuum; you could put hydroelectric into a marginal site that would only run some of the time, and there are sites that aren’t great for solar power or wind.  I’m also going to exclude biopower here, since it’s not low-carbon even if you can make new ethanol, and I’m going to gloss over the regulatory and NIMBY problems for solar and wind power.))

Hydropower proponents claim about 200 GW of available capacity exists today (~85 GW used now).  Geothermal is iffy as a long-term solution, since you can locally tap-out a site and it tends to release hydrogen sulfide, but most estimates I’ve seen give around 100-150 GW capacity is readily available.

By contrast, current US power generation capacity for electric alone is 1300 GW.  If you want to replace home fossil fuel heating and transportation energy and industrial, you’ll need even more than that.

In theory, solar and wind could get to that number.  It’d take a lot of space, but the United States has a ton of space. It’d take a massive amount of equipment and that’s a bit harder because the US’s manufacturing capability isn’t exactly great right now, but it’s at least possible.

But unreliable electric power causes problems: if there’s not enough capacity for demand, or too much capacity for demand, electric things break.  That’s annoying if it’s your AC turning off; it’s bad if it’s your computer PSU dying or a manufacturing reactor welding itself into a bauxite brick.

In some ways, the unreliability of solar in particular isn’t always bad: solar tends to be more productive in hot months, which is about the same time everyone runs air conditioning, so that’s a win-win.  But you also need a lot of energy on a grid during snowstorms, where solar doesn’t do jack.

In theory, the answer is diversification, and then power storage: build extra capacity across the country so local outages have backups elsewhere, and use extra capacity charge batteries/do something to have extra power when you need it.  Diversification is a little complex for stupid grid reasons, but the real problem is storage.

Storage is expensive, and we can’t make a lot of it, and the ways we do make it now are pretty stupid and lossy (and often polluting, when we aren’t just picking up rocks and putting them on shelves).  Even the most wildly optimistic analysis just puts it as the ‘needs work’ category; more reasonable glances are closer to ‘needs a miracle’.

The ideal solution is ‘why not both?’.jpg.  Solar and wind power is (probably) going to be cheaper than nuclear power barring massive regulatory changes, and it’s useful to have power that scales with sun incidence.  Meanwhile, nuclear power is great at providing base load most of the time, but does need occasional scheduled shutdowns for maintenance and refueling that can be timed to minimize impact.

((I should also point out that most assumptions talking about nuclear power as a short-term thing are based on bad understandings at best.  Anti-nuclear advocates will often suggest that available uranium for nuclear plants will run out in a couple hundred years of mass use, but this only is true if we don’t use the remaining fuel in ‘spent’ reactor fuel, don’t enrich new fuel, or don’t look at other materials like thorium.  Which, tbf, we don’t do now!  But more reasonable assumptions are closer to thousands of years for readily-available materials.))

I am so confused by the hyping of nuclear power on here. Is it just because the USA didn't have a major (publicized) malfunction yet?

[feeling-frazzled]

New year same me

Heeeeiii everyone 🌈

First blog post this year as I decided to have a little bit of a breather since Christmas. I am one of those weird people who actually likes January 🤪 I always look at it as a fresh beginning ... every New Year’s Day I always sit and make a goal list of my life goals I would like to achieve that year.

I’m still the same person but there are things I would like to do to better my health and better my mind . So I am currently doing dry jan and I know so many people say “ what’s the point “ and kind of Belittle it and tbh I used to be one of those people and I do remember doing it a couple of years ago and thinking “ what’s the point in this “ but this year I feel very differently. Everyday I battle my way through my thoughts due to anxiety and my depression . I do so much to help myself through , talking , doing this blog , doing my insta posts on my “ feeling frazzled account “ , reading lots of mental health books , mindfulness , meditation , writing a journal , walking , exercise , eating healthy .. you get the jist ....but one thing I never gave up was alcohol . Now those who know me know I love a drink and know it’s a huge part of my character .. I’m not a heavy drinker ( anymore ) but I would buy a bottle maybe two a week and have a few glasses throughout the week but mostly the weekend . I don’t drink everyday or anything but I would get to Thursday ( thirsty Thursdays as I always call it ) have a couple .. same throughout the weekend . Like even on a Sunday I couldn’t cook a roast without having a glass of red with it !! It’s minor I know but I always feel it the next day even if it’s only two glasses and I feel it with my anxiety . Over Christmas I met up with one of my best friends and we went for dinner and then had a few gins and I woke up the next day feeling so horrific with anxiety ... and that’s when I said I just need a break this feeling isn’t worth it at all . That’s only really when I drink to access like that night I had had a glass of red , about 4 gins and a couple of espresso martinis ... I don’t usually drink that much tbf but it did make me question why do I make myself more and more anxious . I’m quite an outgoing girl and don’t need alcohol to have fun or anything but it’s just automatic isn’t it ? To be honest I think it’s just habit .. and don’t get me wrong I love going for dinner and really nice bars . I don’t do nightclubs anymore due to getting spiked very badly over a year ago and it really terrified me and it still does . I have had to have counselling to help me through it as I still get flashbacks but I definitely am in a better place . The world is fucking scary .

Anyway I got recommended a book called “ the unexpected joy of being sober “ when I read the cover my first thought was “ I hope this isn’t going to brainwash me into stopping drinking “ but it was not like that at all it was so raw and has made me think so much about myself . I related to some of the stuff in it as I do believe I did have an alcoholic period in my life where I was drinking far too much . I’m not an alcoholic but I do believe we can all have periods in our life where alcohol can take over. Just some of her stories really haunted me as I have gotten myself into really bad situations being so off my face . I’ve been barred from clubs , I’ve fallen asleep in club toilets , I’ve had my stomach pumped by paramedics on nights out , I’ve broken bones ... yeah this was all years ago but when I read this book all these flash backs came flooding back and I felt so ashamed of myself . I know we grow as we get older and we are “ older and wiser “ blah blah but I do think back and just wish I could tell that person I was it wasn’t the answer . I don’t regret anything ... of course I wish some things didn’t happen but I believe it has shaped me into the woman I am today . I got diagnosed with depression a couple of years ago but looking back to what I was like growing up in my early twenties especially I just wasn’t right . It was more than just having fun on a night out I was clearly deeply unhappy .

Anyway the point of this post is dry jan has been more of a health reason for me to see how clear my mind can be without it and to see if it eases my anxiety ...I am now 18 days in and I am feeling more energised and clear headed . I’m still anxious of course but it does feel different . It’s my birthday at the beginning of February and I’ve decided to wait and not have a drink until then .. and then after that I am just going to see how I go. I’m not saying I’m given it up forever because I don’t feel I need to do that but reading that book has definitely made me want to cut down massively . It’s like last night it was the first time I’d craved a drink since I started dry jan and when I actually thought about it .. I was feeling low and the drink would of just made me worse ... sure enough the feeling passed and I had a cuppa ! It’s little changes like that I would like to take on board for the future !! Also the book speaks so much on not having to rely on drink to have fun and bring you all the joys of life ... I want to work on that and realise that i don’t always need a drink to have fun .. !!

Other life goals I’ve made this year are moving more ... using my Fitbit as a motivator . Learning to cook more dishes as I sometimes get trapped in cooking the same things every week so I want to grow more with that . Meditate every day which I mostly do anyway but I want to make sure I stick to it as it really does help me and I notice when I haven’t meditated as I am more irritable . Small changes create big things ... looking after my mind is definitely my main priority..... so many of us tend to worry more about what we look like rather than focus on the real problem .. our thoughts !!

Anyway I’ve rambled on a lot now haha ! I hope this has helped and let me know what you think you can dm me on insta or Twitter and I love hearing back from people it really helps me and gives me so much strength . It’s not easy writing these blogs but I want to raise as much awareness for mental health as possible and help as many people as I can a well as helping myself !!

My insta where I post a lot on mental health is instagram.com/feeling.frazzled 😘🌈🌈 lots of love xxxxxx

[melindarowens]

Fed Takeaways – Weekly Market Report By CapitalistHQ.com

Good morning,

Weekly Market Preview – All About Inflation This Week

Political Analysis: 4 Events That Could Cause a Pullback

Why Did An Analyst Report Cause a Drop in Stocks Last Thursday?

Fed Takeaways

Oil Analysis & Outlook

Weekly Economic Cheat Sheet

Futures are basically unchanged following a relatively quiet weekend of market related news, and after more solid economic data.

Economic numbers from Europe remains good as European inflation firmed slightly (core HICP, their CPI, rose 1.2% yoy vs. (E) 1.1%, while unemployment was 9.1% vs. (E) 9.2%.

Chinese official July manufacturing PMI slightly missed expectations at 51.4 vs. (E) 51.5, but the number remains comfortably above the important 50 level.

Meanwhile, political noise and drama grew ever bigger over the weekend (NK missile launch, White House Chief of Staff change, Russian’s expelling US diplomats, Verbal attacks on China from the administration over North Korea) but from a market standpoint this is all background noise and it won’t move markets despite the headlines.

Today should be a relatively quiet day as there is just one economic report, Pending Home Sales (E: 0.9%), and no notable Fed speakers and the critical economic releases this week don’t start still tomorrow (the Core PCE Price Index).  So, absent any easily identifiable catalysts this morning, we’re back to watching the tech sector – as it goes, so goes the market.

Sincerely,

CapitalistHQ.com

Stocks

This Week

Earnings are largely “over” from a market influence standpoint, although there are still some big names to report (AAPL on Tuesday is this week’s highlight).

But the real focus of markets this week will be on economic data and specifically inflation metrics. Tomorrow’s core PCE Price Index (the Fed’s preferred measure of inflation) and Friday’s wage number in the jobs report will be key. Soft numbers will spark a “dovish” sector move, while strong numbers will push reflation sectors and assets higher.

Last Week (Needed Context as We Start a New Week)

Stocks were little changed last week as early gains, powered by strong earnings, were undone by soft earnings and a sharp pullback midday Thursday. That move was caused by a cautious note from a well-respected analyst. The S&P 500 slid 0.02%, and is up 10.42% year to date.

Trading was quiet at the start of last week, as stocks drifted slightly lower Monday despite strong July flash PMIs. Markets rallied on Tuesday following strong blue-chip earnings (the Dow led markets) and stocks were up modestly going into the middle of the week.

Wednesday was a day of digestion, as the FOMC meeting provided no real surprises (balance sheet reduction in September, probably a rate hike in December).

The week saw volatility on Thursday as an early earnings-related rally was undone by a cautious research report from J.P. Morgan quant analyst Marko Kolanovic. The Nasdaq went into mini-freefall midday Thursday, but steadied by the afternoon, and the S&P 500 managed to finish flat after being down nearly 1% intraday.

On Friday, markets opened modestly weaker on soft earnings and on carryover from Thursday’s volatility. Then the soft economic data (ECI) came in and led to a dip in bond yields, as stocks drifted higher to finish with mild losses (essentially flat on the week).

Your Need to Know

Last week was the peak of earnings season, so sector trade was dominated by corporate results. Generally speaking, the numbers were pretty predictable: Sectors that have seen massive YTD outperformance saw selling on decent earnings (SOXX). Conversely, sectors that have massively lagged YTD saw short covering on results (consumer discretionary and energy both outperformed last week). But, nothing in the results in aggregate appear to warrant any tactical sector buying or selling.

The one exception is the Dow Transports, which plunged more than 2% last week on bad UPS and LUV earnings/guidance. We watch Dow Theory closely, so the weakness there caught out attention, but that hasn’t prompted a trend change yet.

So, with earnings behind us, the focus returns to the tech sector, which remains the key to this market. Tech is over-owned and crowded, but fundamentals and momentum remain positive. So, as has been the case for all of 2017, as tech goes, so too goes the market near term. Last Thursday’s midday reversal did look scary for a bit, but by itself it’s not a reason to materially abandon tech allocations (although if you want to lighten up a bit in favor of international exposure, that certainly is understandable and we will likely do that this week. For now, tech (FDN and SOXX) are still in well-defined uptrends.

Bottom Line

Is this as good as it gets?

It’s a legitimate question to ask as the macro outlook looks relatively benign (barring one major issue, which we’ll get to). First, Q2 earnings season is largely over and the results were strong, and the 2018 consensus S&P 500 EPS (per FactSet) is $139. That means we’re trading at 17.7X next year’s earnings, historically high (and unsustainable) but that’s where we’ve been all year, so by itself it’s not a reason to sell.

Second, economic data remains uninspiring but it’s not rolling over materially, and the loss of momentum in inflation is making the Fed back off its hawkish rhetoric from earlier in 2017. Longer term this may cause a problem from a “too easy for too long” standpoint, but that won’t result in a near-term correction.

Third, the market has weathered the ever-increasing political soap opera in Washington with impressive resilience. Near term, with Obamacare repeal dead, and tax reform still months away from anything concrete (markets don’t expect action till Q1 2018), as long as Republicans don’t do the unthinkable and either 1) Shut down the government as the controlling party or 2) Have a debt ceiling scare, politics shouldn’t be a major influence on markets (as long as Trump doesn’t fire Mueller or introduce steel tariffs that trigger a trade war).

So, while there’s not a lot to push stocks materially higher, the outlook is at least benign… for now. However, the sense of complacency in the inevitability of a rally is growing, and we’ve seen that in the VIX at record lows, a concern mentioned in a key JPM quant report that took markets down Thursday.

There is a potentially enormous shift occurring over the coming months as 1) The Fed begins to reduce its balance sheet, and 2) The ECB announces the tapering of its QE program.

From a broad sense, if we admit that historical, decade-long easy policy from central banks birthed this current positive set up for markets, then it’s a legitimate concern to wonder how stocks will react once that accommodation begins to be withdrawn.

While the bulls will argue policy will stay very easy for a long time (and that’s true), often times in markets it is the second derivative (the rate of change of change) that moves stock and bond prices.

So, we are left with two concerns: 1) What positive catalyst is looming out there to push stocks materially higher? 2) Why are markets too complacent heading into balance sheet reduction/ECB tapering (i.e. low VIX).

Given this backdrop, we remain cautiously positive on markets and our preference remains towards more defensive sectors: Super-cap tech (FDN/SOXX), healthcare (XLV/IHF/IBB), and international exposure including Europe via HEDJ/EZU and emerging markets via IEMG. Japan also is becoming more attractive via EWJ. We are not adding to the small initial positions we took in our “Reflation” ETFs of KRE, XLI, IWM, TBT and TBF, although we are holding them.

For now, the outlook requires a “steady as she goes” mentality with focus on sector selection, although our eye remains to the macro horizon as we are afraid things are as good as they can get.

Economic Data (What You Need to Know in Plain English)

Need to Know Econ from Last Week

Data has been remarkably consistent the last few weeks, including last week: “OK” but not great economic growth, and consistent signs that inflation is losing momentum. As such, the economic data continues to point to a “Stagnation” set up for stocks and other assets.

Given that inflation trends are more important than growth trends right now, I’ll start with the Quarterly Employment Cost Index, which, like many other inflation indicators in Q2, slightly missed estimates. The Q2 ECI rose 0.5% vs. (E) 0.6, maintaining a 2.4% yoy increase from Q1, but slightly disappointing vs. expectations.

Additionally on Friday, the PCE Price Indices from the Q2 GDP report showed deceleration in the pace of inflation. The PCE Price Index rose just 1% in Q2 vs. (E) 1.2%. Now, none of these inflation statistics are particularly bad. Yet from a policy standpoint, these numbers won’t make the Fed eager to tighten policy ahead of the current schedule (balance sheet reduction in September, rate hike, probably, in December).

Turning to actual growth data, it was “ok” but not great. Q2 GDP met expectations with a 2.6% yoy gain, and that was a true number as Final Sales of Domestic Product (which is GDP less inventories) was also 2.6%. Consumer Spending, or PCE as it’s known in the GDP report, rose 2.8%, again a solid but unspectacular number.

Similarly, June Durable Goods, while a decent report, wasn’t that strong. The headline was a big beat at 6.5% vs. (E) 3.5%, but that was because of one-time airline orders. New Orders for Non-Defense Capital Goods ex-aircraft, the best proxy for corporate spending and investment, was revised higher in May but dipped 0.1% in June. Point being, like most growth data recently, it wasn’t a bad report, but it’s not the kind of strength that will spur a reflationary rally.

Finally, the one economic data point that was strong last week was the July flash manufacturing PMI. It rose to 54.2 vs. (E) 53.2, but while that is a potential positive (it’s a July report so it’s the most current) the PMIs are surveys, and the gap between soft survey data and “hard” economic numbers remains wide.

Turning to the Fed meeting last week, the two takeaways were: 1) The Fed confirmed that they will reduce the balance sheet in September, barring any big economic or inflation surprises. 2) The Fed did slightly downgrade the inflation outlook, but importantly it kept open the option to hike rates at any meeting, and as such a December rate hike is still likely).

Important Economic Data This Week

As stated, inflation is more important than growth data right now, so that means two most important numbers this week will be tomorrow’s Core PCE Price Index (contained in the Personal Income and Outlays report) and Friday’s wage data in the jobs report.

Stocks have rallied since Yellen turned incrementally dovish at her Humphrey-Hawkins testimony, and soft inflation data will further that sentiment and underpin stocks. Conversely, if we see inflation bounce back, that will push bond yields higher and help reflation assets (banks, small caps, inverse bond funds, cyclicals).

But, inflation stats aren’t the only important numbers this week as we get the latest final manufacturing and composite US and global PMIs. They remain important because they will provide anecdotal insight into the pace of the US and global economy. But again, it would be a pretty big surprise if the data suddenly showed slowing in the global economy.

On the flip side, at least for the US, a strong report would be welcome, because strong economic data won’t cause the Fed to get more “hawkish” unless inflation ticks higher.

Commodities, Currencies & Bonds

In Commodities, the segment was mostly higher last week as weakness in the dollar following the Fed announcement buoyed the entire complex, particularly the metals. Energy also surged thanks to inventory draws in the US and bullish developments out of OPEC. The commodity tracking index ETF, DBC, added 3.46% on the week.

Beginning with energy, oil futures posted solid gains last week with WTI gaining 9.19% and making a run at the $50/barrel mark, a level not seen since late May. The headlines to the EIA report were bullish, with both gasoline and oil stockpiles showing another set of declines. Looking overseas, Saudi Arabia announced that they would be cutting their oil exports (not production, however) by 600K bbls to help ease the global glut. Both were bullish developments.

Going back to the EIA, the details were not so optimistic. Lower 48 production rose 35K b/d, bringing the figure to the highest in over two years, above the 9M b/d mark. Bottom line, futures prices are solidly trending higher, and for the time being the benefit of the doubt is with the bulls. Yet it’s hard to imagine oil gaining materially higher in the absence of a slowdown in US production, which leaves us cautious towards this uptrend in oil.

Natural gas futures declined 1.25% last week but finished off the worst levels as a combination of weather reports and bullish inventory data helped fuel a rally Thursday. Natural gas continues to establish a bottom in the mid $2.80s, an area that offers a solid risk/reward set up as both fundamentals and technicals are bullish.

In the metals market, gold rallied 1.64% last week as the net outcome of the Fed Wednesday was that we are in a stagnation period characterized by low inflation and sideways interest rates. Momentum continues to favor the bulls, but the longer-term technical outlook is neutral for gold following the early July breakdown in the 2017 uptrend. New highs above $1300 would turn the technical outlook back in favor of the bulls.

Looking at Currencies and Bonds, the Dollar Index hit new, 52-week lows last week thanks to a dovishly interpreted Fed decision, lackluster inflation data and hawkish rhetoric from ECB officials. The Dollar Index fell 0.6% with all the losses coming Friday.

Looking at last week’s three main catalysts, inflation (or lack thereof) remains the key influence on the currency and bond markets. Last week’s ECB and soft GDP Price Indices resulted in the dollar falling Friday, and that accounted for most of the week’s declines. That soft inflation also is what’s contributing to the Fed backing off its previous hawkish rhetoric. Until we see inflation firming here in the US, the dollar will remain under pressure as other global central banks are becoming, on the margin, less dovish.

Most foreign currencies rose similar amounts vs. the dollar last week, again reinforcing the point that last week’s dollar declines were US-data driven. The euro rose 0.65% aided by some hawkish comments from ECB member Ewald Nowotny, while the pound drifted 0.61% higher into their central bank meeting this week (no change to rates is expected, but there might be hawkish connotations in the inflation report).

Turning to bonds, Treasury yields drifted slightly higher (10 year up 4 basis points) but that was mostly due to an oversold bounce following the steep declines of two weeks ago.

Going forward, Treasury yields remain at the mercy of two main forces: 1) US inflation data and 2) Global bond yields (especially bunds). The former is weighing on yields, but the latter is putting upward pressure on yields. Barring a surprise economic slowdown, we do not anticipate US Treasury yields retesting the 2017 lows of 2.10%.

This week, economic data will be key for the dollar and bond yields, especially the wage number contained in the jobs report on Friday.

Special Reports and Editorial

Cutting Through the Political Noise: 4 Events That Could Actually Cause a Pullback

The political noise and theatre has officially reached a new level, with Russia, pardons, impeachment and other such terms of significant connotation being bandied about in the media seemingly every day. And if we were just reading the media headlines, it would cause someone to go into serious risk-off mode in their portfolio, especially given the tenor of the major news outlets.

But as we and others have been saying all year long, the market has so far successfully insulated itself from all the political drama, as it doesn’t have anything to do with earnings or (as of yet) the economy.

We’ve been consistent in our coverage of the political landscape, and I feel that we’ve done a good job cutting through the distracting noise. Yet given the recent uptick in political fervor across the media (including financial media), I think it’s helpful to identify, clearly, what political events could actually cause a pullback in stocks.

Absent one of four events happening (as it stands right now), politics will remain a distraction, but not a bearish influence. To be clear, we do not think any of these events are likely at this time; however, we are watching for any hints they might become more probable and cause us to reduce risk and equity exposure.

Political Pullback Event #1: Trump Fires Mueller. There are rumors and speculation swirling that President Trump will fire Robert Mueller, the special counsel in charge of the Russian election tampering investigation. So far, he is not expected to fire him, but Trump is unpredictable. If Trump were to do it, that would cause a risk-off move in markets, as everyone would take it as a tacit admission of some guilt on Trump’s part (i.e. fire the investigator before he finds something).

But even if Trump wanted to fire Mueller, he actually can’t. Only the acting Attorney General can fire Mueller. So first, Trump would need to fire Attorney General Sessions, and then the deputy Attorney General (Rosenstein). Then he would keep firing people until he found someone in the Justice Department that would fire Mueller. If this sounds familiar, it should, because that is what Nixon did when he fired Watergate Special Counsel Archibald Cox.

Given that history (rightly or not) people and markets would take the firing as a de facto admission of guilt that the president did something wrong, even if it’s not true. To boot, Congress would likely reappoint Mueller to the same job immediately, resulting in a massive standoff between the executive and legislative branches of the federal government. Nothing here would be positive for stocks, and a “sell first, ask questions later” mood could sweep across the markets.

Political Pullback Event #2: Steel Tariffs. The idea that the Commerce Department could impose sweeping steel tariffs (likely aimed at China) is a potential negative for markets, because it could ignite a trade war, which would be bad for US and global economic growth. Whether steel tariffs would result in retaliation from China or other nations remains to be seen, but the fact is that macro-economic risks would rise, and once again we’d have a “sell first” reaction from stocks.

Political Pullback Event #3: Government Shutdown. The current budget for the operation of the government ends on Sept. 30. Now, the probability of a shutdown remains low because the Republicans control the government. So, they’d literally shut down the government as the majority party a year ahead of elections, a move so politically stupid that it’s almost inconceivable.

However, this is Washington, and right now the budget being advanced through the House contains $1.6 billion in funding for the Mexican border wall, and a lot of cuts to domestic program. So, we can expect united Democratic opposition and (importantly) some moderate Republicans (Collins, McCain) to potentially oppose the budget, which makes passage in the Senate uncertain.

Political Pullback Event #4: Debt Ceiling. We’re getting a lot closer to the mid-October deadline, and there’s been no progress made. Like the government shutdown, political common sense implies this won’t be a problem given it would be politically disastrous for Republicans. Congress has until mid-October to extend the debt ceiling, or face another default drama.

FOMC Decision

The Fed left rates unchanged and did not alter its balance sheet, as expected. The Fed decision met our “What’s Expected” scenario, as the Fed said balance sheet reduction “relatively soon,” which is Fed speak for September.

To boot, as was also generally expected, the Fed slightly downgraded the outlook for inflation, saying that inflation was running below 2%, as opposed to the previous “running somewhat” below 2%. It’s a minor change that largely reflects the Fed’s recent cautious language on inflation. However, the Fed said that risks to the recovery remained “roughly balanced,” which is Fed speak for “We can hike rates at any meeting.” That last point is important, because risks remaining “roughly balanced” leaves a rate hike in December firmly on the table (Fed fund futures odds have it at 50/50).

Currency and bond markets reacted “dovishly” to the decision, but again that’s due more to a Pavlovian dovish response to any Fed decision rather than an accurate reflection of the Fed yesterday. In reality, the Fed wasn’t materially dovish.

Bottom line, the policy outlook remains the same: The Fed will reduce its balance sheet in September, and likely will hike rates again in December, barring any economic slowdown or further decline in inflation statistics (at which point both events will become less certain). That was the market’s expectation before the Fed meeting Wednesday, and that’s the market expectation after the Fed decision.

EIA Analysis and Oil Update

On the inventory headlines, last week’s EIA report was bullish. While the -7.2M bbl print in oil stocks fell short of the API’s -10.2M, it was much greater than the consensus analyst estimate of -2.6M bbls. The drop in gasoline stocks of -1.0M bbls was largely in line with estimates, but was also seen as bullish, as it was less than the API’s +1.9M bbl build.

The huge 10M bbl draw in crude stocks was the fourth sizeable weekly drop in a row totaling more than 25M barrels, which suggests that refiners are ramping up operations to satisfy the new “real demand” from the East Coast and other “consumer areas.” Digging into the details of the report, there was a shift in the gasoline data in the prior week’s EIA report that showed a significant weekly decline in PADD1 (East Coast) inventories, which is generally seen as “real demand” vs. a draw in PADD3 (Gulf Coast), which can be more a function of refining, production and logistics activities. That bullish trend continued in this week’s report as PADD1 supply was -2.2M bbls.

The production data was bullish at first glance, as total US output fell for the first time in a month with a decline of 19K b/d. That was being paired with bullish industry comments from earlier this week suggesting that US producers are poised to dial down their production growth efforts. The headline was misleading, however, as the drop was due to a sharp pullback in Alaskan production (-54K b/d), and lower 48 production actually rose 35K b/d to break through the 9.0M b/d mark for the first time in over two years.

Bottom line, the near-term trend of falling oil stocks is helping fuel a rally in the energy space; however, the trend of rising US oil production remains relentless. Until that trend begins to show signs of slowing, the upside gains in the energy market will be limited. On the charts, the psychological $50 level will be magnetic, as options’ traders push the market to where the high-volume contracts are (generally round numbers like $50 see higher volumes). Beyond that area, there is significant resistance between $51 and $52/barrel.

Why Did a Research Report Cause a Reversal Thursday?

The most likely “cause” of Thursday’s midday reversal (which frankly looked ugly for an hour or so) was a cautious report from JPM quant analyst Kolanovic, and the reasons it caused a dip are twofold. First, Kolanovic is very respected on the Street, and he was one of the first analysts to correctly identify the role of “Risk Parity” funds in the violent market declines of August 2015. Second, he outright suggested investors hedge equity exposure.

Now, to be clear, it wasn’t a bearish report, as he did note there are strong, positive fundamental factors supporting stocks including a rising economic tide and growing earnings.

However, he made the point that, in his opinion, market volatility is now at an all-time low. The specific accuracy of this claim can be debated, but let’s all agree market volatility is close to, if not at, all-time lows.

The all-time lows in volatility have caused funds to use increasingly leveraged strategies to generate outsized returns. Selling volatility options is one of the simplest leveraged strategies, but the point is this: Quant funds and traders will ratchet-up leverage in low volatility environments to increase returns amidst perceived lower risk. And, since volatility is at or near all-time lows (and has been for some time) these leveraged strategies are both abundant and large.

And, this all-time low volatility and explosion of leveraged strategies is coming right at a time when global central banks are reducing monetary accommodation for the first time in, well, a decade.

So, while the analogy of fireworks sitting on top of a powder keg is a bit over the top, it does illustrate the general idea behind Kolanovic’s caution.

Bottom line, in my opinion, this report by itself isn’t a reason to materially de-risk, as the same argument could have been made about this market over the past few months (as it’s made new highs). But, Kolanovic is a smart guy, so his caution should be noted.

Finally, two anecdotal points. First, I believe what really spooked markets Thursday was Kolanovic referenced this current set up as being similar to “Portfolio Insurance,” a strategy that failed miserably and contributed to the crash of 1987. Obviously, that’s not an uplifting analogy.

Second, for those of us watching the tape yesterday, the mini-freefall we saw in tech and specifically SOXX and FDN, was a bit unnerving. Things steadied, but the pace of the declines midday Thursday was a bit scary. That tells me these are very, very crowded trades, and I am going to have a “think” on potentially lightening up some exposure to that tech sector in favor of shifting it internationally (Europe, Japan, and perhaps emerging markets). Food for thought.

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source https://capitalisthq.com/fed-takeaways-weekly-market-report-by-capitalisthq-com/ from CapitalistHQ http://capitalisthq.blogspot.com/2017/07/fed-takeaways-weekly-market-report-by.html

[everettwilkinson]

Fed Takeaways – Weekly Market Report By CapitalistHQ.com

Good morning,

Weekly Market Preview – All About Inflation This Week

Political Analysis: 4 Events That Could Cause a Pullback

Why Did An Analyst Report Cause a Drop in Stocks Last Thursday?

Fed Takeaways

Oil Analysis & Outlook

Weekly Economic Cheat Sheet

Futures are basically unchanged following a relatively quiet weekend of market related news, and after more solid economic data.

Economic numbers from Europe remains good as European inflation firmed slightly (core HICP, their CPI, rose 1.2% yoy vs. (E) 1.1%, while unemployment was 9.1% vs. (E) 9.2%.

Chinese official July manufacturing PMI slightly missed expectations at 51.4 vs. (E) 51.5, but the number remains comfortably above the important 50 level.

Meanwhile, political noise and drama grew ever bigger over the weekend (NK missile launch, White House Chief of Staff change, Russian’s expelling US diplomats, Verbal attacks on China from the administration over North Korea) but from a market standpoint this is all background noise and it won’t move markets despite the headlines.

Today should be a relatively quiet day as there is just one economic report, Pending Home Sales (E: 0.9%), and no notable Fed speakers and the critical economic releases this week don’t start still tomorrow (the Core PCE Price Index).  So, absent any easily identifiable catalysts this morning, we’re back to watching the tech sector – as it goes, so goes the market.

Sincerely,

CapitalistHQ.com

Stocks

This Week

Earnings are largely “over” from a market influence standpoint, although there are still some big names to report (AAPL on Tuesday is this week’s highlight).

But the real focus of markets this week will be on economic data and specifically inflation metrics. Tomorrow’s core PCE Price Index (the Fed’s preferred measure of inflation) and Friday’s wage number in the jobs report will be key. Soft numbers will spark a “dovish” sector move, while strong numbers will push reflation sectors and assets higher.

Last Week (Needed Context as We Start a New Week)

Stocks were little changed last week as early gains, powered by strong earnings, were undone by soft earnings and a sharp pullback midday Thursday. That move was caused by a cautious note from a well-respected analyst. The S&P 500 slid 0.02%, and is up 10.42% year to date.

Trading was quiet at the start of last week, as stocks drifted slightly lower Monday despite strong July flash PMIs. Markets rallied on Tuesday following strong blue-chip earnings (the Dow led markets) and stocks were up modestly going into the middle of the week.

Wednesday was a day of digestion, as the FOMC meeting provided no real surprises (balance sheet reduction in September, probably a rate hike in December).

The week saw volatility on Thursday as an early earnings-related rally was undone by a cautious research report from J.P. Morgan quant analyst Marko Kolanovic. The Nasdaq went into mini-freefall midday Thursday, but steadied by the afternoon, and the S&P 500 managed to finish flat after being down nearly 1% intraday.

On Friday, markets opened modestly weaker on soft earnings and on carryover from Thursday’s volatility. Then the soft economic data (ECI) came in and led to a dip in bond yields, as stocks drifted higher to finish with mild losses (essentially flat on the week).

Your Need to Know

Last week was the peak of earnings season, so sector trade was dominated by corporate results. Generally speaking, the numbers were pretty predictable: Sectors that have seen massive YTD outperformance saw selling on decent earnings (SOXX). Conversely, sectors that have massively lagged YTD saw short covering on results (consumer discretionary and energy both outperformed last week). But, nothing in the results in aggregate appear to warrant any tactical sector buying or selling.

The one exception is the Dow Transports, which plunged more than 2% last week on bad UPS and LUV earnings/guidance. We watch Dow Theory closely, so the weakness there caught out attention, but that hasn’t prompted a trend change yet.

So, with earnings behind us, the focus returns to the tech sector, which remains the key to this market. Tech is over-owned and crowded, but fundamentals and momentum remain positive. So, as has been the case for all of 2017, as tech goes, so too goes the market near term. Last Thursday’s midday reversal did look scary for a bit, but by itself it’s not a reason to materially abandon tech allocations (although if you want to lighten up a bit in favor of international exposure, that certainly is understandable and we will likely do that this week. For now, tech (FDN and SOXX) are still in well-defined uptrends.

Bottom Line

Is this as good as it gets?

It’s a legitimate question to ask as the macro outlook looks relatively benign (barring one major issue, which we’ll get to). First, Q2 earnings season is largely over and the results were strong, and the 2018 consensus S&P 500 EPS (per FactSet) is $139. That means we’re trading at 17.7X next year’s earnings, historically high (and unsustainable) but that’s where we’ve been all year, so by itself it’s not a reason to sell.

Second, economic data remains uninspiring but it’s not rolling over materially, and the loss of momentum in inflation is making the Fed back off its hawkish rhetoric from earlier in 2017. Longer term this may cause a problem from a “too easy for too long” standpoint, but that won’t result in a near-term correction.

Third, the market has weathered the ever-increasing political soap opera in Washington with impressive resilience. Near term, with Obamacare repeal dead, and tax reform still months away from anything concrete (markets don’t expect action till Q1 2018), as long as Republicans don’t do the unthinkable and either 1) Shut down the government as the controlling party or 2) Have a debt ceiling scare, politics shouldn’t be a major influence on markets (as long as Trump doesn’t fire Mueller or introduce steel tariffs that trigger a trade war).

So, while there’s not a lot to push stocks materially higher, the outlook is at least benign… for now. However, the sense of complacency in the inevitability of a rally is growing, and we’ve seen that in the VIX at record lows, a concern mentioned in a key JPM quant report that took markets down Thursday.

There is a potentially enormous shift occurring over the coming months as 1) The Fed begins to reduce its balance sheet, and 2) The ECB announces the tapering of its QE program.

From a broad sense, if we admit that historical, decade-long easy policy from central banks birthed this current positive set up for markets, then it’s a legitimate concern to wonder how stocks will react once that accommodation begins to be withdrawn.

While the bulls will argue policy will stay very easy for a long time (and that’s true), often times in markets it is the second derivative (the rate of change of change) that moves stock and bond prices.

So, we are left with two concerns: 1) What positive catalyst is looming out there to push stocks materially higher? 2) Why are markets too complacent heading into balance sheet reduction/ECB tapering (i.e. low VIX).

Given this backdrop, we remain cautiously positive on markets and our preference remains towards more defensive sectors: Super-cap tech (FDN/SOXX), healthcare (XLV/IHF/IBB), and international exposure including Europe via HEDJ/EZU and emerging markets via IEMG. Japan also is becoming more attractive via EWJ. We are not adding to the small initial positions we took in our “Reflation” ETFs of KRE, XLI, IWM, TBT and TBF, although we are holding them.

For now, the outlook requires a “steady as she goes” mentality with focus on sector selection, although our eye remains to the macro horizon as we are afraid things are as good as they can get.

Economic Data (What You Need to Know in Plain English)

Need to Know Econ from Last Week

Data has been remarkably consistent the last few weeks, including last week: “OK” but not great economic growth, and consistent signs that inflation is losing momentum. As such, the economic data continues to point to a “Stagnation” set up for stocks and other assets.

Given that inflation trends are more important than growth trends right now, I’ll start with the Quarterly Employment Cost Index, which, like many other inflation indicators in Q2, slightly missed estimates. The Q2 ECI rose 0.5% vs. (E) 0.6, maintaining a 2.4% yoy increase from Q1, but slightly disappointing vs. expectations.

Additionally on Friday, the PCE Price Indices from the Q2 GDP report showed deceleration in the pace of inflation. The PCE Price Index rose just 1% in Q2 vs. (E) 1.2%. Now, none of these inflation statistics are particularly bad. Yet from a policy standpoint, these numbers won’t make the Fed eager to tighten policy ahead of the current schedule (balance sheet reduction in September, rate hike, probably, in December).

Turning to actual growth data, it was “ok” but not great. Q2 GDP met expectations with a 2.6% yoy gain, and that was a true number as Final Sales of Domestic Product (which is GDP less inventories) was also 2.6%. Consumer Spending, or PCE as it’s known in the GDP report, rose 2.8%, again a solid but unspectacular number.

Similarly, June Durable Goods, while a decent report, wasn’t that strong. The headline was a big beat at 6.5% vs. (E) 3.5%, but that was because of one-time airline orders. New Orders for Non-Defense Capital Goods ex-aircraft, the best proxy for corporate spending and investment, was revised higher in May but dipped 0.1% in June. Point being, like most growth data recently, it wasn’t a bad report, but it’s not the kind of strength that will spur a reflationary rally.

Finally, the one economic data point that was strong last week was the July flash manufacturing PMI. It rose to 54.2 vs. (E) 53.2, but while that is a potential positive (it’s a July report so it’s the most current) the PMIs are surveys, and the gap between soft survey data and “hard” economic numbers remains wide.

Turning to the Fed meeting last week, the two takeaways were: 1) The Fed confirmed that they will reduce the balance sheet in September, barring any big economic or inflation surprises. 2) The Fed did slightly downgrade the inflation outlook, but importantly it kept open the option to hike rates at any meeting, and as such a December rate hike is still likely).

Important Economic Data This Week

As stated, inflation is more important than growth data right now, so that means two most important numbers this week will be tomorrow’s Core PCE Price Index (contained in the Personal Income and Outlays report) and Friday’s wage data in the jobs report.

Stocks have rallied since Yellen turned incrementally dovish at her Humphrey-Hawkins testimony, and soft inflation data will further that sentiment and underpin stocks. Conversely, if we see inflation bounce back, that will push bond yields higher and help reflation assets (banks, small caps, inverse bond funds, cyclicals).

But, inflation stats aren’t the only important numbers this week as we get the latest final manufacturing and composite US and global PMIs. They remain important because they will provide anecdotal insight into the pace of the US and global economy. But again, it would be a pretty big surprise if the data suddenly showed slowing in the global economy.

On the flip side, at least for the US, a strong report would be welcome, because strong economic data won’t cause the Fed to get more “hawkish” unless inflation ticks higher.

Commodities, Currencies & Bonds

In Commodities, the segment was mostly higher last week as weakness in the dollar following the Fed announcement buoyed the entire complex, particularly the metals. Energy also surged thanks to inventory draws in the US and bullish developments out of OPEC. The commodity tracking index ETF, DBC, added 3.46% on the week.

Beginning with energy, oil futures posted solid gains last week with WTI gaining 9.19% and making a run at the $50/barrel mark, a level not seen since late May. The headlines to the EIA report were bullish, with both gasoline and oil stockpiles showing another set of declines. Looking overseas, Saudi Arabia announced that they would be cutting their oil exports (not production, however) by 600K bbls to help ease the global glut. Both were bullish developments.

Going back to the EIA, the details were not so optimistic. Lower 48 production rose 35K b/d, bringing the figure to the highest in over two years, above the 9M b/d mark. Bottom line, futures prices are solidly trending higher, and for the time being the benefit of the doubt is with the bulls. Yet it’s hard to imagine oil gaining materially higher in the absence of a slowdown in US production, which leaves us cautious towards this uptrend in oil.

Natural gas futures declined 1.25% last week but finished off the worst levels as a combination of weather reports and bullish inventory data helped fuel a rally Thursday. Natural gas continues to establish a bottom in the mid $2.80s, an area that offers a solid risk/reward set up as both fundamentals and technicals are bullish.

In the metals market, gold rallied 1.64% last week as the net outcome of the Fed Wednesday was that we are in a stagnation period characterized by low inflation and sideways interest rates. Momentum continues to favor the bulls, but the longer-term technical outlook is neutral for gold following the early July breakdown in the 2017 uptrend. New highs above $1300 would turn the technical outlook back in favor of the bulls.

Looking at Currencies and Bonds, the Dollar Index hit new, 52-week lows last week thanks to a dovishly interpreted Fed decision, lackluster inflation data and hawkish rhetoric from ECB officials. The Dollar Index fell 0.6% with all the losses coming Friday.

Looking at last week’s three main catalysts, inflation (or lack thereof) remains the key influence on the currency and bond markets. Last week’s ECB and soft GDP Price Indices resulted in the dollar falling Friday, and that accounted for most of the week’s declines. That soft inflation also is what’s contributing to the Fed backing off its previous hawkish rhetoric. Until we see inflation firming here in the US, the dollar will remain under pressure as other global central banks are becoming, on the margin, less dovish.

Most foreign currencies rose similar amounts vs. the dollar last week, again reinforcing the point that last week’s dollar declines were US-data driven. The euro rose 0.65% aided by some hawkish comments from ECB member Ewald Nowotny, while the pound drifted 0.61% higher into their central bank meeting this week (no change to rates is expected, but there might be hawkish connotations in the inflation report).

Turning to bonds, Treasury yields drifted slightly higher (10 year up 4 basis points) but that was mostly due to an oversold bounce following the steep declines of two weeks ago.

Going forward, Treasury yields remain at the mercy of two main forces: 1) US inflation data and 2) Global bond yields (especially bunds). The former is weighing on yields, but the latter is putting upward pressure on yields. Barring a surprise economic slowdown, we do not anticipate US Treasury yields retesting the 2017 lows of 2.10%.

This week, economic data will be key for the dollar and bond yields, especially the wage number contained in the jobs report on Friday.

Special Reports and Editorial

Cutting Through the Political Noise: 4 Events That Could Actually Cause a Pullback

The political noise and theatre has officially reached a new level, with Russia, pardons, impeachment and other such terms of significant connotation being bandied about in the media seemingly every day. And if we were just reading the media headlines, it would cause someone to go into serious risk-off mode in their portfolio, especially given the tenor of the major news outlets.

But as we and others have been saying all year long, the market has so far successfully insulated itself from all the political drama, as it doesn’t have anything to do with earnings or (as of yet) the economy.

We’ve been consistent in our coverage of the political landscape, and I feel that we’ve done a good job cutting through the distracting noise. Yet given the recent uptick in political fervor across the media (including financial media), I think it’s helpful to identify, clearly, what political events could actually cause a pullback in stocks.

Absent one of four events happening (as it stands right now), politics will remain a distraction, but not a bearish influence. To be clear, we do not think any of these events are likely at this time; however, we are watching for any hints they might become more probable and cause us to reduce risk and equity exposure.

Political Pullback Event #1: Trump Fires Mueller. There are rumors and speculation swirling that President Trump will fire Robert Mueller, the special counsel in charge of the Russian election tampering investigation. So far, he is not expected to fire him, but Trump is unpredictable. If Trump were to do it, that would cause a risk-off move in markets, as everyone would take it as a tacit admission of some guilt on Trump’s part (i.e. fire the investigator before he finds something).

But even if Trump wanted to fire Mueller, he actually can’t. Only the acting Attorney General can fire Mueller. So first, Trump would need to fire Attorney General Sessions, and then the deputy Attorney General (Rosenstein). Then he would keep firing people until he found someone in the Justice Department that would fire Mueller. If this sounds familiar, it should, because that is what Nixon did when he fired Watergate Special Counsel Archibald Cox.

Given that history (rightly or not) people and markets would take the firing as a de facto admission of guilt that the president did something wrong, even if it’s not true. To boot, Congress would likely reappoint Mueller to the same job immediately, resulting in a massive standoff between the executive and legislative branches of the federal government. Nothing here would be positive for stocks, and a “sell first, ask questions later” mood could sweep across the markets.

Political Pullback Event #2: Steel Tariffs. The idea that the Commerce Department could impose sweeping steel tariffs (likely aimed at China) is a potential negative for markets, because it could ignite a trade war, which would be bad for US and global economic growth. Whether steel tariffs would result in retaliation from China or other nations remains to be seen, but the fact is that macro-economic risks would rise, and once again we’d have a “sell first” reaction from stocks.

Political Pullback Event #3: Government Shutdown. The current budget for the operation of the government ends on Sept. 30. Now, the probability of a shutdown remains low because the Republicans control the government. So, they’d literally shut down the government as the majority party a year ahead of elections, a move so politically stupid that it’s almost inconceivable.

However, this is Washington, and right now the budget being advanced through the House contains $1.6 billion in funding for the Mexican border wall, and a lot of cuts to domestic program. So, we can expect united Democratic opposition and (importantly) some moderate Republicans (Collins, McCain) to potentially oppose the budget, which makes passage in the Senate uncertain.

Political Pullback Event #4: Debt Ceiling. We’re getting a lot closer to the mid-October deadline, and there’s been no progress made. Like the government shutdown, political common sense implies this won’t be a problem given it would be politically disastrous for Republicans. Congress has until mid-October to extend the debt ceiling, or face another default drama.

FOMC Decision

The Fed left rates unchanged and did not alter its balance sheet, as expected. The Fed decision met our “What’s Expected” scenario, as the Fed said balance sheet reduction “relatively soon,” which is Fed speak for September.

To boot, as was also generally expected, the Fed slightly downgraded the outlook for inflation, saying that inflation was running below 2%, as opposed to the previous “running somewhat” below 2%. It’s a minor change that largely reflects the Fed’s recent cautious language on inflation. However, the Fed said that risks to the recovery remained “roughly balanced,” which is Fed speak for “We can hike rates at any meeting.” That last point is important, because risks remaining “roughly balanced” leaves a rate hike in December firmly on the table (Fed fund futures odds have it at 50/50).

Currency and bond markets reacted “dovishly” to the decision, but again that’s due more to a Pavlovian dovish response to any Fed decision rather than an accurate reflection of the Fed yesterday. In reality, the Fed wasn’t materially dovish.

Bottom line, the policy outlook remains the same: The Fed will reduce its balance sheet in September, and likely will hike rates again in December, barring any economic slowdown or further decline in inflation statistics (at which point both events will become less certain). That was the market’s expectation before the Fed meeting Wednesday, and that’s the market expectation after the Fed decision.

EIA Analysis and Oil Update

On the inventory headlines, last week’s EIA report was bullish. While the -7.2M bbl print in oil stocks fell short of the API’s -10.2M, it was much greater than the consensus analyst estimate of -2.6M bbls. The drop in gasoline stocks of -1.0M bbls was largely in line with estimates, but was also seen as bullish, as it was less than the API’s +1.9M bbl build.

The huge 10M bbl draw in crude stocks was the fourth sizeable weekly drop in a row totaling more than 25M barrels, which suggests that refiners are ramping up operations to satisfy the new “real demand” from the East Coast and other “consumer areas.” Digging into the details of the report, there was a shift in the gasoline data in the prior week’s EIA report that showed a significant weekly decline in PADD1 (East Coast) inventories, which is generally seen as “real demand” vs. a draw in PADD3 (Gulf Coast), which can be more a function of refining, production and logistics activities. That bullish trend continued in this week’s report as PADD1 supply was -2.2M bbls.

The production data was bullish at first glance, as total US output fell for the first time in a month with a decline of 19K b/d. That was being paired with bullish industry comments from earlier this week suggesting that US producers are poised to dial down their production growth efforts. The headline was misleading, however, as the drop was due to a sharp pullback in Alaskan production (-54K b/d), and lower 48 production actually rose 35K b/d to break through the 9.0M b/d mark for the first time in over two years.

Bottom line, the near-term trend of falling oil stocks is helping fuel a rally in the energy space; however, the trend of rising US oil production remains relentless. Until that trend begins to show signs of slowing, the upside gains in the energy market will be limited. On the charts, the psychological $50 level will be magnetic, as options’ traders push the market to where the high-volume contracts are (generally round numbers like $50 see higher volumes). Beyond that area, there is significant resistance between $51 and $52/barrel.

Why Did a Research Report Cause a Reversal Thursday?

The most likely “cause” of Thursday’s midday reversal (which frankly looked ugly for an hour or so) was a cautious report from JPM quant analyst Kolanovic, and the reasons it caused a dip are twofold. First, Kolanovic is very respected on the Street, and he was one of the first analysts to correctly identify the role of “Risk Parity” funds in the violent market declines of August 2015. Second, he outright suggested investors hedge equity exposure.

Now, to be clear, it wasn’t a bearish report, as he did note there are strong, positive fundamental factors supporting stocks including a rising economic tide and growing earnings.

However, he made the point that, in his opinion, market volatility is now at an all-time low. The specific accuracy of this claim can be debated, but let’s all agree market volatility is close to, if not at, all-time lows.

The all-time lows in volatility have caused funds to use increasingly leveraged strategies to generate outsized returns. Selling volatility options is one of the simplest leveraged strategies, but the point is this: Quant funds and traders will ratchet-up leverage in low volatility environments to increase returns amidst perceived lower risk. And, since volatility is at or near all-time lows (and has been for some time) these leveraged strategies are both abundant and large.

And, this all-time low volatility and explosion of leveraged strategies is coming right at a time when global central banks are reducing monetary accommodation for the first time in, well, a decade.

So, while the analogy of fireworks sitting on top of a powder keg is a bit over the top, it does illustrate the general idea behind Kolanovic’s caution.

Bottom line, in my opinion, this report by itself isn’t a reason to materially de-risk, as the same argument could have been made about this market over the past few months (as it’s made new highs). But, Kolanovic is a smart guy, so his caution should be noted.

Finally, two anecdotal points. First, I believe what really spooked markets Thursday was Kolanovic referenced this current set up as being similar to “Portfolio Insurance,” a strategy that failed miserably and contributed to the crash of 1987. Obviously, that’s not an uplifting analogy.

Second, for those of us watching the tape yesterday, the mini-freefall we saw in tech and specifically SOXX and FDN, was a bit unnerving. Things steadied, but the pace of the declines midday Thursday was a bit scary. That tells me these are very, very crowded trades, and I am going to have a “think” on potentially lightening up some exposure to that tech sector in favor of shifting it internationally (Europe, Japan, and perhaps emerging markets). Food for thought.

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from CapitalistHQ.com https://capitalisthq.com/fed-takeaways-weekly-market-report-by-capitalisthq-com/

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: [Okay, so I think you should go to Libi's room and help her get ready for nursey/fake get ready for school so then no one has any need to burst into the spare room and your idea is he can keep sleeping, whether you will be woken up by everyone else going about their day is up to you] Jimmy: [that's cute Libi will be buzzing and that boy does need to keep sleeping so I will let you] Janis: [she will, we gotta keep her away and distracted, fingers crossed mcvickers are also working and busy today, at least enough that we can get out later if we need to] Jimmy: [there's every chance you'll still get woken up by Cass blowing your phone up because obvs she'd be worried about you but at least that wouldn't be as early as Libi would rock up] Janis: [that makes sense, that will probably be before Janis comes back in the room, like when Cass and Bobby are up and getting ready to go to school 'cos we're likewise faking it] Jimmy: [yeah that's what I figured so I shall hit you up] Jimmy: You going to school? Janis: 🤫 Janis: just going for my oscar Jimmy: 👏👏🌹 Jimmy: What you gonna do to ❌📞 that takes it off you? Janis: I don't care if they know I'm bunking Janis: just didn't need them to come in and see you Jimmy: you could just go in Janis: well yeah, I could Jimmy: I get that you don't fancy it but Janis: You don't have to stay here Janis: or have me come with you Jimmy: 💭 about you, not me Janis: well it's nice of you to be worried about my education Janis: but there's no need Jimmy: even Lucas'd be a right laugh compared to me, is what I mean Jimmy: but there's no need to give him a 🏆 Janis: not about to give him anything 💔 Janis: school's never a laugh, weren't planning to go anyway Jimmy: he'll have to wait a bit for the 💌 you wrote with your other hand Janis: That's DISGUSTING Janis: how dare you Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: my hands have been busy nursing you, nothing else Jimmy: secret's safe with me, mate Janis: yeah, likewise Janis: as I'm out the house for a while, do you want anything? Jimmy: I'm alright Janis: 👌 Janis: Left the 💊s in there if you want more Jimmy: 👍 Janis: Did you get your keys last night? Jimmy: Spare'll be [whatever random location it is] Janis: as long as you can get back in Jimmy: be piss easy to break in if we had to, nowt to worry about Janis: you can't move that fast Jimmy: don't have to, that's what I'd be bringing you for Janis: really Janis: didn't sound keen 5 minutes ago Jimmy: I dunno what you're on about, Joanne Janis: 👍 at me dickhead Jimmy: [a picture of him doing it like there you go] Janis: 😒 Janis: SO pleased your terrible sense of humour hasn't been affected Jimmy: *😁 Jimmy: can't have you missing me, girl Janis: I'm getting bagels, no time to miss you Jimmy: sounds fake, that Janis: you DON'T believe I'm getting bagels? Janis: bit weird, that Jimmy: who the fuck eats bagels outside of the CG? Janis: excuse me Janis: why are you judging my breakfast choices Jimmy: no need to go there to call in sick for me, I can @ my own 👻 manager Janis: I'm obviously 👀 for Pete now you ain't in my way Jimmy: that'd be about right Jimmy: can believe that Janis: you should Janis: very true, very real Jimmy: very 💔 an' all OBVS Janis: I'm sure he'll still hit you up from time to time Jimmy: weren't worried about him Janis: me either, tbh Janis: 😎 and laidback that one Jimmy: there you go then Janis: I’m well concerned about your lack of appetite Janis: Who even are ya Jimmy: SO funny, you Jimmy: never heal if you keep on making me 😂 Janis: That’s why I’m being so 😠😔😒😑 Janis: No 🤡 behaviour Jimmy: 😭🤡🎻 only Jimmy: I get it Janis: You don’t do Italian do you? Jimmy: 🐩🥖🧄🥐🧅🍷🍾 Janis: Of course Janis: sad mime is perfect for you Jimmy: DUH Janis: was thinking Pierrot but you can make it work Janis: Don’t they ALL do French? Unlucky Jimmy: 😭🤡🎻 Janis: Je suis désolée Janis: Yes, I’m very talented, you can @ em Jimmy: [does because no shame and very easy to make that sound saucy and goals especially because they aren't going to school] Janis: 😏 alright I believe it’s you again Jimmy: but do you miss me yet? Janis: Do you want me to miss you? Jimmy: 🤏 Janis: Then in that case I can’t Jimmy: bit rude but alright Janis: s’rude ‘cos you expect me to only miss you a bit Janis: that I can’t do Jimmy: you asked what I want Jimmy: I don't want you to be 💔 Janis: I’m not Janis: I’m coming back once there’s no chance they’ll be coming back Janis: Unless you ain’t gonna be there Jimmy: Do you wanna stay here? Janis: I’m not 100% on their plans Janis: might be easier to be at yours? At least til Ian is home Jimmy: long as you can keep the 🐕 off me Janis: you know she’ll be all over me only Janis: her 😍 are real Jimmy: til I've got something she wants to eat Jimmy: might have to eat your hipster 🥯 here, dickhead Janis: 1. You’re rude and hangry 2. I still won’t let you get ravaged by anybody Jimmy: hang on, I'll send a tweet about not deserving you Jimmy: 🗑 the one I were about to send to Helena now I get why she's always fuming Janis: With big 🍈🍈s Janis: We can get you drugs Janis: Do you want to go drs today? Jimmy: What kind of question is that? Janis: Say you’re a 😎 boy and got in a brawl Janis: If they ask Jimmy: ✔ Janis: Don’t have to Janis: But you would get your own supply Janis: There’s other ways though, I can do it Jimmy: It's a 🥇💡 Jimmy: I just Janis: I get it Janis: I mean I think Janis: It’s a risk Jimmy: if we only get one go at it Jimmy: I might end up wishing I'd waited for worse Janis: It’s alright Janis: I can sort it Jimmy: What does that mean? Janis: I can get you some Janis: No need for Helena or doctor Jimmy: how? Janis: Why ask? Jimmy: 'cause I know you're not making that much 🐕🏃💰 for a start Janis: It’s not that pricey Janis: My dad was a drug dealer you reckon I don’t know any that’ll give me a discount? Jimmy: I don't reckon you should bother Janis: Look Janis: You remember my cousin, Astrid? Jimmy: yeah Janis: Her dad still is Janis: He’d sort me out so someone else didn’t Jimmy: and what if it gets back to someone in your massive family? Janis: He’s not that bothered Janis: Long as he gets enough cash Jimmy: alright, but Ian's paying, you're not Janis: got no problem with that Jimmy: You coming back first or what? Janis: Yes Janis: You’ve got the rest of the ones I took last night Janis: I need to see you Jimmy: Oi, that's what I were gonna say Janis: Say it then Jimmy: come here Jimmy: I miss you Janis: Okay Janis: [come back and you’ve clearly brought him some breakfast and made tea before you came up] Jimmy: [kiss her immediately because we're starting out extra] Janis: [when you’re trying really hard to be gentle and careful ‘cos it is an effort to NOT get caught up in the feelings of it all] Jimmy: [soz to add to the frustration you already feel at being injured and basically having to hide boy cos we all know you likewise wanna just go in and can't] Janis: [we’re so rude, when you finally pull away just looking him over and then looking in his eyes ‘cos best indicator of everything tbh ‘morning’] Jimmy: [never backing down from eye contact even if he probably should rn because we're struggling not just on the physical level but also with his big brother guilt but obvs we're saying it back as we fix her hair because you can't tell me he didn't mess it up just then considering how little else they can touch] Janis: [likewise fixing his as if that’s top priority rn but actually the excuse to touch his hair and face and anything we can is all we need ‘you got some sleep’ because you can’t tell me she didn’t stay up and watch him whilst the drugs low-key knocked him out] Jimmy: [a look like did you because you can't tell me that he isn't worried that she didn't when he's 100% that bitch] Janis: [‘you aren’t that fun to look at’ but a look like that’s not true obvs 😍] Jimmy: [😍 af back because we're essentially saying that she is without actually saying it] Janis: [lowkey shoving that mug at him like now drink ‘cos it’s a love language honey] Jimmy: [drinking it but obvs giving the 😍 still the entire time and I like to think that she put extra sugar in it like my boo does for me sometimes so he's tasted that and done a lil smile because we're in love] Janis: [for your strength boy, definitely, smiling back ‘cos likewise and cannot help it ‘what do you want to do today?’ Like the world is our oyster and we’ve not got all the limitations, sweeping his hair out of his face and throwing out ridiculous suggestions ‘London? New York? Tokyo?’] Jimmy: ['Amsterdam, obvs' because you literally get offered hard drugs when you're just walking about that's a true story and he is genuinely worried about her having to do this even though we know Drew is basically harmless at this point he doesn't] Janis: [‘druggie’ but we’re being playful not actually shady, dramatically rolling our eyes and tutting, that said about Drew if he’s not with his missus or another woman yet he might tell your mum but we can use that if we wanna] Jimmy: [yeah I think he will have just got out of prison if I have my timeline correct so it's likely he's not with her yet and that's worth noting, but Jimothy is just playfully nudging the bae with his good side] Janis: [probably thirsty for some Alison attention then tbf, but for now we’re rolling up last nights sleeping bag like we’re packing for Amsterdam] Jimmy: [eat your breakfast boy and give her a begrudging nod because the bagel is actually nice] Janis: [‘I didn’t get it from CG’ like that’s why it’s nice lol] Jimmy: ['wouldn't have you back yet if you had done' do he mean that it's always busy and he's not there working doing the most or do he mean because Pete might be working or both haha] Janis: [‘called that about him’ and we 😉] Jimmy: ['he'll be chuffed to bits that you get him'] Janis: [‘I’ll be chuffed when I do’ and putting the sleeping bag away and sitting back down with him] Jimmy: [putting his head on her shoulder like we're so forlorn and pouty about this] Janis: [‘should’ve never of introduced us’ like he did not lol, we tugging at his pouty lip with our fingers to switch it up] Jimmy: ['I never' when he can still get the words out before she's got his lip lol but then we're just giving her a LOOK because that's distracting excuse you gal] Janis: [a LOOK back that’s like yeah I regret it also because it was distracting and now we’re like] Jimmy: [running his thumb across her bottom lip because we always do that and also like well I've got this good hand here we can make use of] Janis: [ACTUALLY pouting because we can’t do anything to him ‘you’ll get out of breath’ brag but true] Jimmy: [😏 because we love the brag 'I'll live' like it already hurts anyway so what does he care is very much the attitude here now since we can't pretend we're fine this time because she knows] Janis: [‘yeah and I wanna kill you’ like that’s the problem ‘we could just-‘ and kissing him with our hands dramatically up like remember the rules] Jimmy: ['it's still gonna hurt' said as we kiss her really intensely anyway so she knows we think it's worth it] Janis: [making a noise in protest but it just sounds hot ‘cos we cannot protest enough for it to be meaningful rn with how much we wanna] Jimmy: [and we all know whenever she makes any kind of noise she gets one back so that really won't help the protest soz] Janis: [we are going in as much as remotely capable rn] Jimmy: [hard same so I hope you took those painkillers jimothy] Janis: [you’re young and hardy and in love so even though you are injured you’ll be okay I think] Jimmy: [the feels will get you through it] Janis: [you can’t help yourselves we can’t help that] Jimmy: [you've gotta do what you've gotta do lads and I respect that] Janis: [we’ll make you do an ice bath or something else to help you later it’s okay we’re looking after you as well as, just looking at him with so much love] Jimmy: [snuggling as best we can because 1. we don't want her to go back out 2. the love 3. we know she didn't get hardly any sleep and we want her to] Janis: [‘we should go to yours before we get comfortable’ but we’re not moving yet] Jimmy: [a noise like mhmmm yes we should but we're not moving either and we're just doodling on her with our fingertip like shh go to sleep] Janis: [kinda chasing his finger with ours around and then doing a little thumb war moment] Jimmy: [that's so cute and you're 1000% getting that look of love returned] Janis: [big yawn ‘you need a double bed’] Jimmy: [playing with her hair because she's adorable and we're redoubling our efforts to get her to fall asleep 'I'll @ Ian in a bit, he'll be chuffed to sort it for us' we all know he is on his best behaviour for at least a while after this kind of thing has happened so we're not even joking really] Janis: [‘braid it if you like’ amused because we know it’s a mess, moreso when we start furiously shaking our head like no no don’t mention him ‘we’ll steal this one’ which is an amusing mental image, mcvickers like excuse me lol] Jimmy: [he is braiding it even though she was taking the piss because he's got a sister and shit parents so he obviously can and will be making a rose out of paper or something for that throwback when he's done 'if you carry it' because remember when he had to carry that desk, there's no chance haha] Janis: [when that’s shaken you to your core because it’s so soft and intimate and you can’t, just nodding like yes I will do that] Jimmy: [just having that soft moment] Janis: [‘you’re...’ and just shaking our head ‘I wish I could explain you’ and poking him in the cheek like how dare you] Jimmy: [presenting her with this 🌹 you've crafted before you stick it in her hair like look how much of a Pinterest mum art hoe I am, I get why you're speechless because #goals '@ Bill he'll give you a hand, might do with the bed an' all' playfully push her down like poltergeist energy which is accidentally saucy af] Janis: [when it’s genuinely impressive but you’ve got to take the piss because it’s too much all ‘round ‘been going to see Asia’s ma, yeah?’ A look like such a hun babe but we’re literally shhed by this sauciness full 😳 because we can’t even fight back or anything to diffuse the tension] Jimmy: [poke her in her 😳 cheek because gotta take the piss too for the same reason] Janis: [‘dickhead’ and going to get up like right we must go now] Jimmy: [stopping her from going but in a soft way not like !!!!!! because he doesn't want to go home yet even though it makes more logical sense] Janis: [‘you can’t go out the window’ like if they come back we won’t be able to sneak you out ‘that said-‘ because we understand not wanting to go back even though Ian is not there ‘-if they come back, we could be quiet til they go again’ because they have no reason to go in the spare room] Jimmy: [an anxious lip bite that he can't stop himself from doing because they are hiding here and it's nice but when they go back it'll feel real again and he'll be watching the clock for when Bobby's back because that's a whole thing of not wanting him to know that he's hurt but knowing that there's shit he won't be able to do in terms of big brother duties even before you get into the Ian-ness of it all but she's not wrong that it makes sense for them to go for that reason and because Twix but DUH that's all too real and emosh to express when you can just instead take the piss about not being able to be quiet so we're obvs doing that instead] Janis: [immediately going to squeeze his hand when the lip bite and then retracting like oh too serious but we’re kinda stuck like well what do we do though] Jimmy: [the audacity of this boy then being like okay come on let's go as if he didn't just stop her in her tracks] Janis: [tryna roll with it regardless because it’s not our struggle so we’ll go either way] Jimmy: [hold hands as you strut on over the road lads, we all know he's gonna smoke even though he isn't supposed to, tut tut] Janis: [not asking for/taking one ourselves to show our disapproval] Jimmy: [a look like ? because in no world has he not noticed this] Janis: [a look like don’t be daft] Jimmy: [passing her the 🚬 like are you gonna take this or what] Janis: [‘you’re alright’] Jimmy: [looking at her again like why are you being weird but not saying anything] Janis: [looks at him like why are YOU smoking dickhead but likewise we’re not saying stop or anything] Jimmy: [thank god it's a short walk so shit can't get too tense] Janis: [not trying to start an argument about it] Jimmy: [get in the house please and see what carnage you're gonna be greeted with because Jimothy has not been there to tidy up and Twix will be feral] Janis: [oh twix gal, just waving him up the stairs like you go, I’ve got this] Jimmy: [trying to get her to come with you like leave it even though you know she won't] Janis: [obviously not, but we will come up to tell him we’re gonna take her for a quick walk] Jimmy: [lowkey fuming because he can't do anything like he doesn't even ever want to take Twix for a walk but it's not the point so he's just 😒 because it's obvs not her fault and we don't wanna be a dick] Janis: Won’t have time to miss me Jimmy: What else have you got planned for me to do? Janis: Well she’s going for a piss Janis: Have a race Jimmy: 👍 Janis: Hmm, could be a bit more enthusiastic Jimmy: might do when you have a more 🥇💡 Janis: I’ll get to 💭 Jimmy: ⏲ Janis: You ain’t going anywhere, boy Jimmy: it's you who reckons you won't be long out Janis: Okay admit you miss me already Jimmy: or what? Janis: what do you reckon Jimmy: I reckon that's a question instead of an answer Janis: Pot kettle Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: 🙄🙄 Jimmy: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: Is this you having fun, like? Janis: Mission accomplished for me Jimmy: just you asking questions you already know the answer to, nowt else Janis: Already got you food Janis: What else do you reckon I can achieve in 5 minutes 🤔 Jimmy: loads obvs Jimmy: that kind of mate and fake boyfriend, me Janis: Delusional ✅ Jimmy: *dead supportive of owt you might wanna achieve, more like Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 Janis: *for your own benefit only Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: what makes you 😁☀ does me, Jules, you know that Janis: SO sincere Jimmy: Tah, I'll take my 🏆 whenever Janis: You can have whatever you like today Janis: The rules Jimmy: sounds fake, that Janis: Don’t act like I don’t give you EXACTLY what you want Jimmy: never said that Jimmy: but I don't want owt 'cause you feel sorry for me Janis: It’s not like that though is it Janis: That’s if it’s unwarranted Janis: Getting beat up IS shit undeniably Jimmy: I just don't want it to get like that, alright Jimmy: he fucks up enough bollocks for me Jimmy: without making this weird Janis: Okay Janis: Fair enough, I mean Janis: But I’ve already said I can’t just pretend you ain’t injured when you are, so that’s the bare minimum Jimmy: I heard, you're alright Jimmy: be enough of that going about Janis: And you know feeling bad that you have to put up with this shit doesn’t mean I think it’s your fault Jimmy: it were my fault Jimmy: he's a knobhead, I get that, but I give him loads of chances to be a massive one with what I do Janis: You’re not doing that for no reason though Janis: Not that it’s an excuse for overkill anyway Jimmy: when I've literally had a plan to make him fuming I don't get to be all 🎻💔😭 that he is Jimmy: or even 😒🌧 Janis: Your plan ain’t to get the shit kicked out of you Janis: It’s for the kids Janis: He’s the one fucking up Jimmy: I knew what would happen Jimmy: I'm not a kid Jimmy: and he's been like this since I were Janis: Just because you knew it’d happen, don’t mean that’s why you did it, that’s all I’m saying Janis: You’ve got a plan and you don’t have to feel like a dickhead about acknowledging how shit it is even if you knew it’d happen Janis: It’s a byproduct not the end result and he’s still a tosser for it, not you Jimmy: I feel like a dickhead 'cause this plan's for nowt Jimmy: you said it before, it's not working or gonna Jimmy: only way he's ever chucking his job in or doing owt else is if it suits him, it don't matter what I do Janis: You can always force someone’s hand Janis: You just need to rethink and keep thinking Jimmy: you can always let someone down an' all Janis: You’re never gonna be the one making them stay here, that’s on him Jimmy: I'm the only one who's about to make it better, that's on me Jimmy: and I've not Janis: It isn’t your fault that that’s impossible Jimmy: I don't want our kid 💭 owt's impossible, he's 6 Janis: It’s fucked up Jimmy: yeah Janis: and it is Janis: but he ain’t the only one Janis: there’s groups and shit that might actually help a kid his age Jimmy: well social him, he'd be 😁😁😁 about that Jimmy: I can't do everything and be everywhere Janis: alright Janis: never mind Jimmy: if you're volunteering to go sign for him, Libi'll chuffed an' all that you're practising Janis: Just leave it out yeah Jimmy: alright, calm down Janis: I am calm Jimmy: 👍 Janis: He can come now Janis: So I’m gonna be a while longer Jimmy: right Janis: Shouldn’t be ages Janis: He can’t be far Janis: #parolelife Jimmy: Dunno if it's meant to be comforting or what that you know a shite drug dealer Janis: Shit drug dealers still have good drugs so what’s it matter Jimmy: what's it matter that he's been caught before? Oh I dunno, mate Jimmy: must just be paranoid, me Janis: 🙄 Janis: No one gets done for personal use, you won’t get in trouble Janis: Anyway he just got out so he’s super paranoid himself Jimmy: don't 🙄 @ me for being bothered about you, dickhead Janis: But I’m fine, seriously Janis: It’s safer than stealing helenas even Jimmy: I'll leave it out then Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: You can Jimmy: I just said that, yeah Janis: I mean, worrying about me is not ever something you need to add to your to-do list Janis: I take care of myself Jimmy: never said owt else Janis: 👌 Jimmy: 👌 Janis: not making it weird remember Janis: you need the drugs, I can get them without having to do anything crazy Janis: I’ve known him all my life, my ma hers basically, it’s chill Jimmy: you heard me say I were leaving it out Janis: yeah Janis: I heard Jimmy: no need to try and convince me of owt then Janis: sure Janis: No need to chat til I’ve got your shit then Jimmy: if that's what you want Jimmy: in a bit Janis: I just need to focus Jimmy: alright Janis: there’s too much bullshit to explain Jimmy: It's alright Jimmy: don't need your life story Janis: 👍 Jimmy: *👋 Janis: [however long that actually takes, come back and throw these at him ‘you only need one, and don’t take another til tonight if you can’t sleep’] Jimmy: [IRL 👍] Janis: [awkwardly hanging round for a bit before going downstairs to sort the dog out with food water etc] Jimmy: come here Janis: why Jimmy: why not? Janis: I’m a bit busy Janis: So if you’re not dying, like Jimmy: you'll be fuming if I come to you, know what you're like Janis: seriously Jimmy: just come here Janis: [show up like what] Jimmy: [a look like no come as close to me as physically possible thank you] Janis: [holding out for a hot sec but we’re begrudgingly coming over ‘what?’ bemused like] Jimmy: [a soft 'hey' as we playfully but softly tug on the braid we did earlier because we love and missed you gal and we wish you didn't have to just do that but it means a lot that you did] Janis: [trying to shrug him off because we know lowkey we're gonna get in a lot of trouble if Drew does tell for all the reasons] Jimmy: [will not be shrugged off and will instead cuddle you because we know something is wrong obvs] Janis: ['ugh, you're so needy' but we're 😏 like bants and not pushing him away because that'd be a step too far even if we are in a mood] Jimmy: [kissing her neck as if she's challenged us to be needier by saying that] Janis: ['oi...' like distracting, 'scuse me] Jimmy: [doing it again but softer] Janis: ['what are you- why are-' stopping 'cos both stupid questions] Jimmy: [just looking at her like ? but also 😍] Janis: ['aren't you mad at me?' genuine q 'cos think he is] Jimmy: ['what for?' another genuine question because we're clearly not] Janis: ['no need to go over a convo we already didn't wanna have'] Jimmy: ['I've got nowt to be fuming at you for, not that massive of a dickhead' because she's literally doing everything to help him] Janis: [nods like okay because we're truly not trying to beef if he's not 'you don't want my life story, I heard'] Jimmy: ['what I said were I don't need it, I told you ages ago, it's up to you what you wanna tell me' we still mean that, we're not trying to get the goss here like one of the gals] Janis: [laying down on this bed and sighing 'it'll be fine'] Jimmy: [lying on her in a very Twix manner like this will cheer you] Janis: [just reacting like can you please be careful omg but a lil smile 'you're a nerd'] Jimmy: [writes 'you' on her and draws the 🤓 'nowt's changed just 'cause you've one upped Helena this time'] Janis: [IRL 🤞] Jimmy: [signs 'I promise' because we all want it to be fine] Janis: ['don't care anyway, it'll just be a lot'] Jimmy: ['I don't need to worry about you, I heard' but we clearly are] Janis: ['worry's the wrong word'] Jimmy: ['is it?'] Janis: ['it'll be a timesuck' pausing like this is just being confusing and I cba 'he isn't just Astrid's dad'] Jimmy: ['Who else is he?' Oh boy you're not ready for what we've done with this family tree] Janis: [rolling our eyes then closing them like it's nothing but a chore/embarrassment and not a mess that hurts us all 'let's see, my half sister's dad, my dead sister's dad, dad's adopted brother...what else? Oh, he tried to fuck my oldest sister, that's about the latest incestual connection we tried to make happen'] Jimmy: [let's take a moment to appreciate the genuine shock, confusion and wtfness of his expression even if Janis can't see it because her eyes are closed] Janis: [lol soz to just unload that on you boy but we're in a preemptive mood about all those people coming at us potentially, literally sounds like it doesn't make sense 'he fucked my ma and her partner, they both had kids with him, the white ones, he lived with my dad growing up, who they also fucked but just my ma got knocked up by him'] Jimmy: ['is he gonna tell your mum?' cos lbr that's what is important here, not the messiness of Ali and Carly which you can think about on your own time if you want boy] Janis: ['might do' 'cos we really don't know 'obviously not in the good books since the whole trying to get off with an 18 year old thing, he might reckon it'll work, he's clearly pretty thick'] Jimmy: [a look like fuck's sake and you still thought it was a good idea to go meet and get drugs off him] Janis: [a look like duh] Jimmy: [just shaking his head because we're not trusting ourselves to say anything rn with how fuming we are/how much we already have to worry and feel guilty about] Janis: ['it's not like he's gonna bother again, not really his type anyway' and a little tap like come on] Jimmy: [the most unamused sound ever] Janis: [just like pfftt in response 'I know I was safe'] Jimmy: [a sigh in response 'and you know I don't want owt if it might fuck you over, that's been part of the plan since there were one'] Janis: ['I don't care, I can handle them so you can have some painkillers' shrugging like I was just saying, not saying I shouldn't have] Jimmy: [about to say that he cares because duh but doesn't because it's extra and she's being really casual] Janis: [sitting up dramatically like fuck this 'I am going to work though' like we just realized how much this all is and we gotta bounce] Jimmy: [going against not wanting to be extra immediately by stopping her from going in a more !! way than we did last time because we don't ever want her to go but especially not like this] Janis: ['don't' like we can't keep doing this 'you've got all you need'] Jimmy: [the actual 💔 on his face though because OUCH] Janis: [oh gal, when you immediately wanna take it back and you literally like go back towards him to say something but you don't 'cos you think that's not fair, so we're biting our lip and blurting out 'see you later' as we run] Jimmy: [oh lads, the drama] Janis: [ugh, idk how you're gonna come back from this hun, we're gonna have to give it some time for sure] Jimmy: [these dogs just going on the longest walk they ever have lol] Janis: [when you've burnt all your bridges everywhere if Drew blabs tehe, just gotta weigh up all your options here] Jimmy: [are we gonna say he does or no?] Janis: [I think it makes sense to do it to ramp it all up] Jimmy: [agreed and we know Drew would] Janis: [he's got form, and then you lowkey have an excuse to hit him up later/stay/so then Ian can't do shit again either] Jimmy: [it's coming together honey] Janis: [we could also do some sibling moment when this does come out if you wanna] Jimmy: [I'm always down for that] Janis: ['cos we can always do Grace but also Billie probably is not gonna be happy gal] Jimmy: [the Drew of it all will upset her for sure] Janis: [we're all triggered] Jimmy: [Tess gonna be livid thinking she's not realised someone else in this fam has a drug habit] Janis: [lol @ the habit it looks like you have, straight up pain pills] Jimmy: [you really have triggered your mother into thinking about Carly's accidental OD] Janis: [lordy the argument we're gonna have to have, hooray] Jimmy: [derailing ourselves here but I do love the drama that will blatantly ensue] Janis: [soz for the level you don't need this and we are fully aware of that fact which makes it worse but] Jimmy: [I just hope Rio don't try and weigh in on this in a big sister way cos gal no] Janis: [you know she will but luckily we can only reference this lol] Jimmy: [we could literally have Tess ban her from the house and Libi off the back of this if we want, like that's enough considering this fam's history] Janis: [it is, I can restart this convo with all this in mind like this evening, assumedly late like when everyone's gone to bed] Jimmy: [go for it boo] Janis: you still not want me to run away? Jimmy: What kind of question is that? Janis: just answer it Janis: it's time sensitive Jimmy: don't be a dickhead Jimmy: 'course I don't want you to piss off again Janis: then I need a place to stay Janis: for a bit Jimmy: you know where the spare is Janis: thanks Jimmy: it's nowt Janis: not to me Jimmy: alright then Janis: I'll be quiet when I come in Janis: I just need the bed Jimmy: it don't matter, you can't wake him with a slamming door and I know my sister ain't 😴 Janis: It'll take me a while to get there Janis: no buses at this am Jimmy: you need picking up? Janis: nah Janis: I need the walk Janis: and you don't need to drive right now Jimmy: I'm not off my head on any 💊s if that's what's bothering you Janis: you're also in a sling Janis: even if it were me that did it not a dr Jimmy: and what, I'm the first dickhead to drive one handed? least I wouldn't be pissing about texting with the other one Janis: I wanna walk, don't worry Jimmy: 👍 Janis: Sorry about earlier Janis: and this too, whilst we're at it Jimmy: you can leave it out Jimmy: told you before apologies do my head in Janis: clearly my aim, like Jimmy: 🏆 Janis: right Janis: 🥇 Jimmy: or nowt, exactly Janis: nowt very impressive about that Jimmy: I dunno, something to be said for how fast you 🏃 out of here Janis: Well I weren''t helping Janis: was trying to undo some of the shit I'd blabbed and done already, believe it or not Jimmy: got no reason not to believe you Janis: don't reckon me couch surfing is remotely helpful/works in my favour there but whatever Jimmy: I get that you've got it in your head that I only do owt when it benefits me but Janis: not saying that Janis: I did but not in that context Jimmy: whatever you 🗨 girl Janis: don't 'cos I fucking didn't Jimmy: I'm not thick, I were there AND I understand context Janis: Don't act like you know what I meant better than I do Jimmy: not doing a scene Jimmy: your motivations are up to you Janis: yeah Janis: you don't need to tell me Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: never mind Jimmy: how much trouble you in? Janis: it's a matter of opinion, really Janis: everyone's got one an' all Jimmy: if you haven't already said it were me, you should do Jimmy: not a stretch with the accent and that Janis: that's assumed Janis: even if we're all assuming I'm a druggie now, they've at least been nice enough to reckon I'm not doing it alone Jimmy: that you'd come from a family of romantics were assumed an' all Janis: already told you about the multiple baby daddies and child bride nonsense Janis: no sherlock points for putting that together Jimmy: you're assuming I didn't before that but alright Janis: always saying you ain't a mind reader Jimmy: don't need to be Jimmy: SUCH a romantic, you Janis: ha ha Jimmy: 💕🌹 Janis: we get it, I'm as romantic as you are funny Jimmy: Tah very much Janis: Well everyone's being dramatic as fuck anyway Janis: why I couldn't get out 'til now Jimmy: but you're alright? Janis: yeah Janis: I just can't be around mum, she can't be around me, either or Janis: not allowed 'round nans, officially, as they can happily kick me out without it being rude Janis: and my sister is trying to kidnap me as if she's not actively fucking up her own kids like mother of the year Jimmy: you can stay here long as you want, I promise not to let Ian or my sister chuck you out Jimmy: 🐕 might kidnap you though Janis: They won't know I'm here Janis: and not even my grandparents actually know where your house is Jimmy: Libi does Janis: 🤞 we're above interrogating a 4 year old Jimmy: I'll cross what I can Jimmy: long as you don't get mardy about it Janis: got my own problems now Jimmy: thank GOD Janis: I'm not in the mood Jimmy: I got that Janis: you could act like it then Jimmy: alright Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: yeah maybe Janis: might come tomorrow night instead Jimmy: do what you like Janis: that's the other option Jimmy: meaning what? Janis: it's pretty obvious Jimmy: shouldn't be hard to 🗨 then Janis: I didn't want to stay Janis: I asked you Jimmy: Bollocks Jimmy: if you didn't want to stay you wouldn't have asked me fuck all, you'd already have pissed off Jimmy: having said nowt, same as before Janis: no, actually Janis: because I give a shit about not making it worse for you Jimmy: what were it you said? act like it then Janis: fuck you you literally couldn't care less Jimmy: based on what? Jimmy: all the times I've literally said I do or all the times I've shown you it Janis: based on I try to have an actual conversation with you and you won't Janis: you don't wanna hear it Jimmy: you don't wanna 🗨 it, more like Jimmy: unless it's bollocks about how unbothered you are Janis: I've not been the one making shit jokes this whole time Jimmy: you're the one who pissed off earlier Jimmy: and chats about how you might show up Jimmy: like I haven't been worried about you this whole time Janis: You know why I left earlier because I told you that too Janis: and nothing about this conversation has made me want to stay any more, sorry about that Jimmy: if you gave the slightest shit I wouldn't have to beg you not to fucking leave me in the first place Janis: that's no more fair than me saying you don't care 'cos you're gonna leave Jimmy: What weren't fair is you being fake about what would happen when I said yeah to you getting the 💊 Janis: Because I could predict all of this Jimmy: you didn't have to act like it was nowt Jimmy: piss easy compared to nicking off Helena, you said Janis: and it was Janis: not my fault he reckons this will score him any points Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: if he had any sense he'd see how bad it makes him look, it was 50/50 and I lost Janis: so what, you needed them Jimmy: so what? Jimmy: 'course I don't wanna hear how fucked it all is now there's nowt I can do about it other than feel like a massive dickhead Jimmy: it's my fault, you should've told me Janis: doesn't matter what I told you I would've done it anyway Jimmy: yeah, I really wanna hear that an' all Janis: what, that I don't do exactly what you tell me to Janis: must sting, sure Jimmy: that you don't care what I 💭 Jimmy: it does Janis: it's not all about you Jimmy: it weren't you who needed them, dickhead Janis: I got 'em though Janis: even if it weren't meant to get back to my entire fucking fam, it's still nice to get one over on 'em regardless Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: forget I said owt then Jimmy: you're obvs #thriving Janis: don't remember asking for your judgment either so easily done Jimmy: make up your mind, you've either got problems and I'm the twat who won't let you 🗨 about them or you regret nowt and you'd do it all again given the chance Janis: They ain't mutually exclusive, believe it or not Janis: I don't need to regret it to still be fucked over by it Jimmy: convenient, that Janis: yeah, it's well convenient having to beg a bed off you Jimmy: about as much as me apparently having to force you not to go anywhere else Janis: apparently, fuck off Janis: what'd be the point in that, attention? Janis: I'm good for it Jimmy: how one sided to do you wanna make this sound? Jimmy: you literally said the only reason you're hanging about is so I'm not 🎻💔😭 Jimmy: fuck that Janis: I said I would so you didn't have to think up yet another lie about where I am and why Janis: 'scuse me for not giving you more to do Jimmy: yeah, that's what'd bother me about you being gone Janis: I know it wouldn't be ideal Jimmy: I don't give a shit about my to-do list, you twat Janis: don't call me a twat Janis: twat Jimmy: stop being one Janis: alright Janis: truce Jimmy: 🤝 Janis: 🤝 Jimmy: bit rude that we can't start this whole day over Jimmy: probably would've gone loads better if we had nicked the 🛏 Janis: we'd both have room to sleep anyway Janis: and desire to, like Jimmy: the sofa's massive Jimmy: we could just sleep there Janis: weird flex Janis: but we could Jimmy: might be if I'd bought it Janis: save your money for rehab, junkie scum Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: as meet cutes go Jimmy: I'm gonna be SO chuffed to bits to see you there, my dear Janis: bit awkward when Helena waltzes in Jimmy: Bill's 👻'll sort it before there's a proper love triangle, we're alright Jimmy: sounds fake that she'd be capable of owt like 💃 any road Janis: DUH Janis: the back pain ain't real, babe Jimmy: bit awkward that she looks like that then Jimmy: 🐪💔 Janis: shut up, you're ALWAYS going on about her 🍈🍈 Jimmy: that's you bringing her MASSIVE tits up Jimmy: I've never even 👀 Janis: I know the 😎 ain't 'cos you're blind, mate Jimmy: but I am as 🥇 as one of their 🐕s, babe Jimmy: proper dedicated to you, me Janis: that's the right level of 🤮🤮 Jimmy: There you go Janis: well done you 👏 Janis: tweeting it ain't a great use of my phone's battery though so I'll leave it Jimmy: can take care of you for a bit now you're 🤮🤮 there's nowt else I want, duh Janis: natural order has been restored for you  🦶🪓 Jimmy: 😁 Janis: 💕 Jimmy: least it'll stop you going Jimmy: and I won't have to 🥺🥺🥺 Janis: I never said you were gonna 🥺🥺🥺 Jimmy: but I'll have a go now if it'll do owt to get you here Janis: I'll come Janis: I want to Jimmy: UGH FINE, I'll put my 📷 down Janis: 😁 instead Janis: seemed a bit fake, tbh Jimmy: [of course we are] Jimmy: 💔 the lighting ain't 🔥 Janis: I know, I look mental with the 🔦 right now Jimmy: could've looked 🥇 in the 🚗 but you said no Jimmy: nowt's more flattering than headlights, ask anyone Janis: sounds like something someone who wants to go dogging would say Janis: bit suspicious Jimmy: #datenight Janis: be good to get some other people's bodily fluids in the car before we roll Ian up in carpet Janis: 💡 Jimmy: Lucas' especially Janis: ��� Janis: the betrayal Jimmy: daily DM off him since we ain't been in just isn't the same, can't help that Janis: was talking about him murdering his BFF Janis: but nice to know you've been up to your usual tricks Jimmy: ❌ Jimmy: hang on, I'll delete that Janis: such a slag Janis: always known it about you, don't worry Janis: have to put up with it Jimmy: trapped you now 🛏⛓🦶🪓 Jimmy: should've been more 🔊 if you had complaints Janis: I'll live Janis: maybe Jimmy: you'll 💀💀💀 Janis: promise? Jimmy: I promise Janis: 😁 Jimmy: show me Janis: it'll be spooky Janis: 🔦 remember Janis: [but do] Jimmy: 🎃 Jimmy: you're still top rated, don't worry Janis: good to know Janis: all about the 🥇s Jimmy: 👻 kinks Jimmy: that lighting Janis: can do it when we get to yours but neighbours might reckon you're being raided or something Jimmy: 👮🚔 kinks an' all Jimmy: you're ✔ them all off Janis: you're very welcome Jimmy: you an' all 🚪🔑 Jimmy: but not just 'cause of how fit you are or how it's been ages since you were here Janis: you still wanna be my mate too then? Jimmy: never stopped wanting you Janis: good Janis: me either Jimmy: where the fuck are you? Jimmy: on a scale of middle of nowt to outside here Janis: maybe half way Janis: bit stupid to stop for an argument but there we go Jimmy: you gonna let me pick you up now or what? Janis: mmm Janis: go really slow Jimmy: what, so you can overtake me 🏃 past? Jimmy: #fortheflex Jimmy: I'll let you drive back 😇 Janis: you'd just really prove their point if you died Janis: be careful Jimmy: only 💀💀💀 at your hands, baby Jimmy: Bill ain't having it any other way Jimmy: 🖋🩸 Janis: 👍 Janis: I'll be the 🎃 Jimmy: your fake tan is too good for you to pull it off Jimmy: soz Janis: 🥺🥺 Jimmy: @ Ella for how to get orange Janis: might be medical Janis: I'll see whilst you're driving Jimmy: eats nowt but 🍊🥕 Janis: bet she can see in the dark no prob Jimmy: don't even need a long lens to stalk 💀👑 Jimmy: go on, if you could only eat one thing what would it be? Janis: 🥧 is actually a good answer Janis: you could fill it with loads of different things to make it not boring and monotonous Jimmy: bit better than 🥔 Janis: you can have potato a few ways Janis: but no dessert option Jimmy: don't even need school, you Jimmy: 🥇🧠 Janis: I'll let them know Janis: hand in my resignation Jimmy: 👍✔ Janis: and I'll 🤐 now Janis: let you concentrate Jimmy: but Janis: but nothing Janis: you're already one-handed Jimmy: [the poutiest selfie ever from behind the wheel like okay I'm in and gonna drive but 💔] Janis: 🥺 Janis: see you soon, baby Jimmy: [drive and get her boy and don't die please] Janis: [you can do it boy, the levels of pleased to see you cannot be overstated but reign that hug in a little bit so we don't injure him further] Jimmy: [it's okay we know he's as pleased to see you gal and will cling to you if it kills him and we've got those 💊s waiting for us whenever they are needed] Janis: [trying not to say sorry over and over but you gotta say it at least a few times even though you know he does not care for it] Jimmy: [will shh you by kissing you even though I usually hate to do that trope because how rude] Janis: [sometimes it's warranted] Jimmy: [in this case I'll allow it because you're not literally having an argument which is when I hate how it's done the most and also he would do it rn so I have to be true to Jimothy] Janis: [we know we're all allowing it because it's what we both want anyway] Jimmy: [the feels are never gonna be higher than any time she might run away so] Janis: [instead we're gonna hide at yours and pray that Libi doesn't blab lol, we're trying honey, 'cos this is a lot worse than the shit nan situ tbh] Jimmy: [it is and I'm honestly proud of her for not just panicking and going because that's #growth and he can't go on a full roadtrip to rescue you driving one handed rn] Janis: [this is us trying babayyy] Jimmy: [jimothy will be very appreciative like honestly if we don't hook up in this car rn it'd be a miracle as will me stopping him from dropping the L word at all times] Janis: [we do have to switch seats so she can drive, any excuse and it's really not needed when we're so emosh] Jimmy: [again, we're allowing it because you both blatantly want it to happen] Janis: [when do we not tbh but yes, you deserve all the moments] Jimmy: [I'm cackling as I always am because where are they even] Janis: [lord knows lmao, hopefully far away enough from hers that no one is clocking you and not far enough into town that anyone else really is] Jimmy: [I just picture some random little housing estate like] Janis: [we'll be nice and say it's not getting up for work/school time yet huns, last thing you need is getting arrested for indecent exposure in a car that ain't yours lmao] Jimmy: [likewise last thing you need when you get back to his is to meet Ian getting ready for work that's a hard no] Janis: [yikes lmao, casually try to brawl you, not now, at least Bobby will be pleased to see you] Jimmy: [even though he'll wanna talk about Libi when he knows Janis is here which is a touchy subject] Janis: [just gonna have to blag our way through that for a while, soz boy, I think she'd be at school though like 99% so you can hang out at lunch and breaks] Jimmy: [jj keeping everything from Bobby like it's their job cos he's already pretending to be much less injured than he actually is as per] Janis: [mhmm, nothing to see here babe] Jimmy: [anyway, drive back gal so he can stare at you with 😍 the entire time] Janis: [literally just 😍😊 so much but try to focus even though this road'll be dead tah] Jimmy: [will shamelessly hold your hand like look how easy it is to drive one handed and that's obvs the only reason] Janis: [obviously, not like you constantly need to touch each other for reassurance] Jimmy: [of course not] Janis: [get in lads, Twix don't bark honey we're pleased to see everyone too] Jimmy: [she probably will but we don't care if she wakes up Ian as long as he doesn't appear] Janis: [we know you're on best behaviour rn sir but we don't wanna see you now because we're all about each other] Jimmy: [don't wanna see you ever lowkey but yeah rn we're busy gesturing to the living room and up the stairs like where do you wanna sleep/get comfy and be] Janis: [genuinely pondering this 'do you need to be on a bed?' and going into the living room and testing how squishy the sofa is casually] Jimmy: [just following her around amused which is making me smile cos I imagine Twix is following her too] Janis: [that's cute and we definitely think so, 'we'll try the sofa tonight but if it's no good then we'll make your bedroom work, yeah?' 'cos we wanna snuggle so we must] Jimmy: [IRL 🤞 because we promise and also we hope it'll work because sick of that bed when you know he was sulking in there for ages after she left, but don't worry gal you'll know if he's not comfortable as he literally can't fake anything around you] Janis: ['can make a den if you like' throwback 😏 but actually being useful and getting the blankets etc] Jimmy: [obvs pretending like we are going to for a sec but actually sit down boy because you're probably hurting quite a lot by now and Twix shall calmly chill with you because she been knew] Janis: [sneak upstairs for that duvet gal] Jimmy: [I like to imagine that he's left her a doodle for today up there that he quickly did before he got in the car to get her because he's a nerd in love] Janis: [we fully would not be expecting one today so we're buzzing and bringing it down like 😁 'always showing off, Mr Ambidextrous'] Jimmy: ['can't have you thinking I forgot' because literally first chance he would've had to do one because we've had a busy day of both highs and lows soz lads] Janis: ['I'd forgive you' and a feelsy lean like obvs and also this has been a DAY 'but I like it'] Jimmy: [just casually undoing this braid and combing through her hair with our fingers so softly because it has been a DAY you're not wrong boo and all we want is for the bae to actually get some sleep tonight because we know she didn't before] Janis: [happy sigh and leaning into him as much as makes sense right now 'I'm not going to leave again' which sounds like never but lol 'I missed you'] Jimmy: [literally don't need to still be playing with her hair but of course he is and of course he nearly said that he wasn't gonna leave either because of how much he doesn't want to 'only if you chuck us in your bag' a nod to Twix who is blatantly snuggling with them and probably already snoozing 'no need to miss each other then'] Janis: [probably snoring too so we're like 'who wouldn't miss this?' like it's all bants but obvs not] Jimmy: [pretending like we're gonna chuck something at or nudge awake this poor pup but we obvs don't 'I don't wanna do this without you' so quietly it's like did you even say that sir and not elaborating because we mean literally anything] Janis: [lowkey smacking you with a pillow like how dare you but obviously we're being so soft in everything we're doing rn, so when we're cupping his face like that really hurt and then he says that we can be sincere 'you don't have to' 'we're a team, right?'] Jimmy: [a nod because I don't trust you rn thank you Jimothy and then we're cupping her face and kissing her really softly but intensely] Janis: [y'all do need to shh so go in for this kiss because it'll be everything] Jimmy: [enjoy all the softness and intense feels] Janis: [I hope the necessity of not wanting to be any more extra than we have been already keeps y'all quiet but who knows lol] Jimmy: [oh lads I do love you] Janis: [least you will exhaust yourselves into some sleep pretty quick] Jimmy: [you both very much need some so please do] Janis: [have some before the kids get up lol, never ending truly] Jimmy: [Gonna have to get Bobby ready for school and take him because Cass did yesterday and so your big brother guilt meter has gone up] Janis: [best bet for you is to walk the dog and then go to his room so you aren't in the way gal] Jimmy: 👍? Janis: 😁 Janis: how's the kid Jimmy: he's trying to take your 🥺🏆 Jimmy: but I ain't letting him stay here Janis: you've got 2 working feet to put down, babe Jimmy: but if it comes to dragging him kicking and signing I'm gonna need a hand off you Janis: is he too old to promise/bribe with a treat after school if he behaves Jimmy: What kind of question is that? Jimmy: I'd be chuffed with that still Janis: we'll talk about it when you're ready to go back then Janis: what's he really like for tea? you could do that tonight Jimmy: 🥧 DUH Jimmy: #cantakealadoutthenorthbut Janis: are you serious Jimmy: What do you 💭? Janis: taking copying you TOO far Jimmy: it's 🍕 mate Jimmy: he loves chucking the toppings about 🧀🍅🎨 Janis: technically a pie Janis: but much better and more normal for a 6 year old who doesn't work down a mine Janis: we can do that easy then Jimmy: steady on, bit early for 🤯 Jimmy: you and your bloody 🥇🧠 Janis: yeah, I could do with a few more hours too Jimmy: soon as they've gone and the 🐕's knackered an' all Janis: you had her beat for 😴 in the end Jimmy: 💊💔 Janis: a deadly combo or? Jimmy: @ Helena for the full list of ✔❌ but that's one Jimmy: 😴😴😴 Janis: wonder if she has a valentine Jimmy: other than me, you mean? Janis: 😡 Janis: oi Jimmy: you're alright, I'm just gonna post her a card Jimmy: no 🎁 Janis: who else are you gonna send a 💌 Jimmy: Depends Janis: ? Jimmy: do you mean for 💔 or 💕? Janis: we'll have to go back to school to see how many couples are left to 💔 Jimmy: When? Janis: when do you want to? Janis: considering we'll have to, eventually Jimmy: I don't want to Janis: of course Jimmy: Ian'll have a massive strop if I leave it ages though Janis: what about we take a week off? Janis: should be doable Jimmy: from now or including the days we've already been pissing about? Janis: you choose Janis: you're the actually injured one Jimmy: and my 👻 manager's actually FUMING Jimmy: gonna have to go back there first Janis: yeah Janis: 💸 calls Janis: that's gonna be hard though Jimmy: should've taught you more ☕🎨 Janis: yeah Janis: I can try and help but they won't let me make the shit Janis: maybe I can chuck it at the people eating in though Jimmy: You're so Janis: you can come with me when I walk the dogs Janis: at least when we're not at school, we can make it all fit Jimmy: alright Jimmy: I'll practice faking my customer service 😁 on them Jimmy: before I have to crack on in front of 💀👑 and her 👀🔪🔪 Janis: and if you get bit, we can have another week off Jimmy: I get it, that's your real plan Jimmy: tah, dickhead Janis: 'course I want to hide forever but Janis: 🤏 unrealistic and a lot more rude to sacrifice you to the cause Jimmy: just not the face Jimmy: never earn any tips else Janis: I won't let you get hurt Janis: are all of your coworkers dickheads? Janis: you could genuinely @ the decent ones for an IOU on helping you out for a bit Jimmy: you just wanna slide into Pete's DMs Jimmy: he's already been covering Janis: well it would be my pleasure, obvs Janis: but I'm just tryna help tah Jimmy: I'll @ him Jimmy: don't you worry your pretty but massive head Janis: 🙄 Janis: FINE Jimmy: I'll tell him you'll 🎤 for his band, yeah? Jimmy: since you wanna help Janis: help you, dickhead Janis: don't you wanna be special? Jimmy: the favours were your 🥇💡 Jimmy: I ain't special enough to reckon I'll get away with just 💰🍻 Janis: awh babe Janis: don't do yourself down Jimmy: you've never done a proper shift at the CG Jimmy: dunno what a pisstake it is Janis: okay so you need to do him an actual favour Janis: 💭 Jimmy: UGH fine Janis: when would I have time to moonlight as his singer Jimmy: how many 🐕🏃 are you doing by 🔦🌙⭐️ Julie? Janis: I can't sing, soz Janis: you're delusional Jimmy: Bollocks Jimmy: I've heard you Janis: you've got the 👂 equivalent of 😍s Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: you're too 🙀🙀🙀 more like Janis: shut up Jimmy: I still like you Jimmy: and reckon you're 🎤🤩🏆 Janis: yeah there's only so far I'm willing to go to help you, like Janis: draw the line at looking that much of a twat Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: bit rude Janis: you'll survive Jimmy: have to Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: I won't ask you to join any shit band for me either Jimmy: difference is 1. I would do 2. they wouldn't have me Jimmy: but alright Janis: I wouldn't whore you out for favours is the the difference,boy Jimmy: but you COULD, girl Janis: 🙄 Janis: you'd be mad if I actually fucked him though Jimmy: I never said take the favour that far Janis: 👌 Janis: good thing I said no then Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: 🙄🙄 Jimmy: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: when are you back Jimmy: when do you want me back? Jimmy: were gonna leave you to your 💭💕 for a bit Janis: come back Janis: but do you want ☕🍽 first or straight to 🛏 Jimmy: What kind of question is that? Janis: Just tell me which room you wanna find me in Jimmy: 🛏⛓ or nowt, you know that Janis: okay Janis: ⏲ Jimmy: you want me to 🏃? Janis: You doubting my ability to be patient? Jimmy: or your nursing kink being #ultimate far as the list of ones I've 🔓 goes Janis: but I want you to come and look after me, not the other way 'round Jimmy: and I want you to 💀💀💀 me, nowt else Jimmy: ❌🏃 Janis: I can wait Jimmy: I'll make it worth it Janis: You do Jimmy: won't even ask for a lullaby in a bit as you're so mardy about it Janis: if you can't get me to make the right sounds, that's on you Jimmy: and if you can't wear me out, that's on you Janis: I know I can Janis: and I've got faith in you, for the record Jimmy: I know what I'm doing an' all Jimmy: no need to put your faith anywhere else Janis: I won't Janis: not that fussed about God, like Janis: don't tell Jimmy: 🤐 Jimmy: he'll never have a clue after you did such a good job on the outfit Janis: more for you than him as well Jimmy: I'll keep that between us an' all Janis: 🤐 Jimmy: Dunno about faking I'm not 💔 when you're best mates with him in heaven and I'm left with his fit ex boyfriend or whoever the fuck the devil is meant to be but Janis: you're not going to hell Janis: and I ain't going to heaven Jimmy: Chuffed to hear it, LDR from here to the north is one thing Janis: Catholics are big on purgatory Janis: we're all gonna be stuck there for ages, apparently Janis: I'll find you Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: how hard can it be? Jimmy: you're asking the wrong lad Jimmy: might get a 🤏 lost, me Jimmy: have to draw a picture and ask every dickhead if they've seen you Janis: Or I'll 👀 for the lost boy Janis: sounds like something Bill'd approve of, so it'll work Jimmy: There you go then Jimmy: we've got a plan Jimmy: be alright Janis: just about Jimmy: [come back boy and find her IRL] Janis: [have your moment honeys now the house is free] Jimmy: [oh the freedom to actually be alone and not have to worry about anyone else for a bit] Janis: [y'all should have a shower 'cos it's a mood and you probably need the help Jimothy lowkey] Jimmy: [the bruises will be !!! by now so we'll all be shook] Janis: [at least it means you healing but gonna kiss every one of those] Jimmy: [what a mood, I hope you do get a bit more sleep as well kiddos because we know that's always needed] Janis: [you truly can sleep all day, set an alarm lads] Jimmy: [only got dogs to walk and pizza ingredients to sort out] Janis: [awh a lil grocey trip, that's a mood, get all your stuffs] Jimmy: [omg yes because that's a nice throwback to when you got snowed in and you made the bubs breakfast and had to go get ingredients, love how coupley and domestic y'all are effortlessly, the gals will be losing it all the updates] Janis: [it's so foreign to how you generally are as people and that's what makes it amazing] Jimmy: [we love it for you] Janis: [we should get Cass a takeaway style one you know when you can buy 'em hot from sainsbos or whatever, in case she thinks this is lame so we don't lose points lol] Jimmy: [that's a good save boo because even if she wanted to decorate pizzas you know she won't because moody tween] Janis: [mhmm, I know your age hen and you're angry enough without us forcing frivolity on you] Jimmy: [it's annoying enough that JJ are living their best life in your gaff, we get it] Janis: [it's been a while since you moved, you can meet your friends soon and feel a bit better] Jimmy: [getting that vday card soon hun, hang in there] Janis: [meanwhile we're truly having the best time even though we gotta do a lot of resting like it can't even bring us down] Jimmy: [he should definitely steal something for her because it's been ages since that happened] Janis: [ooh, what could you steal] Jimmy: [probably needs to be something little because we're not trying to set off alarms here hmmm] Jimmy: [Winnie says it should be a keyring so when they get back he can put one of the spare keys on it for her, though I dread to think what the actual keyring will look like cos supermarkets only cater for kids and huns] Janis: [Good idea Winnie, the funnier the better with the aesthetic clearly] Jimmy: [it'll make you laugh and then be feelsy when he puts the 🔑 on so we've covered some bases there, I'm devastated that Jimothy is hurt so he can't try and squeeze himself into the child trolley seat because you know he would, another time sir] Janis: [very good idea, my boo says devastated honey, also can't race around on the back of trolleys but there's literally all the time, you should lowkey have a competition to see who can find the most embarrassing item for the other to have to take to the till] Jimmy: [there will be other supermarket shops, hang in there lads, you've still got #bants] Janis: [I'd say get weird pizza toppings for each other but also want you to have a decent dinner so don't actually buy 'em thank you] Jimmy: [we love taking the piss but we won't actually commit to making you eat it, likewise try and find the creepiest toys as a nice throwback to China's birthday party present list and the best hun outfits and accessories] Janis: [supermarket clothes pop off sometimes that will be amusing] Jimmy: [and any excuse to go into a changing room tbh, we know what you two are like] Janis: [shameless, like you've not been doing it any time you woke up in the day lol] Jimmy: [I don't think this is the exercise that nhs direct meant for fucked ribs Jimothy but live your best lives] Jimmy: [also if this supermarket has any make up testers on that aisle please piss about with those like you're the gals thank you] Janis: [lmao probably the opposite but you know, only a teenager once, one of the actual gals should come in 'cos we're clearly doing this for when the kids get home, so whoever it is can report back] Jimmy: [love that and I hope you did see us taking the piss, also he's gonna pick out the ugliest hair accessories like we're just gonna braid those in rn in the middle of said aisle, all the mums trying to shop will be fuming at y'all] Janis: [so mad they're not at school like who can force them, will see Jimmy is injured though which don't think anyone else knows yet so you can get your gums flapping about that] Jimmy: [seems like somewhere Hollie might be and it's never you so why not, like maybe Asia and her mum saw him on the school run this morning but he was downplaying it majorly then for Bobby and also obvs trying to avoid you so as likely you didn't] Janis: [I vibe it, you're probably not even being that bitchy just like oh Jimmy's got a sling on btw] Jimmy: [yeah she'd probably just like ?? wonder what he did @ Grace like do you know and then Mia and Ella will be !!!] Janis: [like it IS something scandalous but the odds of it being are so low like come on gals get a grip] Jimmy: [we get it you've got nothing going on in your own lives but for god's sake] Janis: [Grace could put it together about the need for pain pills though FYI] Jimmy: [totally, she isn't as thick as she's pretending to be so we could do the Janis and Billie convo like when it all kicks off but leave the one with her until more like now potentially] Janis: [that makes sense to me too, obvs she'll still be like why can your bf not go to the drs like a normal person but you know] Jimmy: [yeah, that is still very weird and god knows what Grace will be thinking happened but at least she won't be thinking Janis is a junkie so we'll take it] Janis: [fun times babayyyy] Jimmy: [can you think of any more supermarket shenanigans or have we milked this as hard as we can?] Janis: [we probably have, get home for these kiddos, can take Twix for her other walk] Jimmy: [she'll be buzzing] Janis: [can take Bobby to the park that's always a treat after school] Jimmy: [and when he's around you won't be smoking so the bae won't be fuming at you] Janis: [and we can subtly run around after Bobby so you don't have to go as hard] Jimmy: [the teamwork makes me happy] Janis: [hard same] Jimmy: Don't chuck the swing over, know what you're like Jimmy: 👀 Janis: excuse you Janis: that was chav boy #2 get it right Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: convenient scapegoat, him Jimmy: when we get back to school, be piss easy to blame that dickhead for loads of shite Janis: dunno what year he's in Janis: or if he goes to our school Janis: still Jimmy: can't believe you didn't do a Q&A with him Jimmy: who are you? Janis: bit busy Janis: you've called me a pisshead way more Jimmy: should've called you a lightweight an' all Janis: if you wanna lie Jimmy: you can't 🤹 owt unless you're sober, what'd you call it? Janis: tbh I weren't that interested in them Janis: was you who had the questions, apparently Jimmy: I got that from how chuffed you were to piss off with me but tah for 🗨 Janis: obvs Janis: in it for the free shit not 😍 Jimmy: 💔 for them Janis: ikr Janis: Mia'll probably fuck 'em Janis: or make one of the others Jimmy: speaking of her Jimmy: we going to school tomorrow or what? Jimmy: been 👀 now Janis: really fucked up sending their biggest spy Janis: we don't have to Janis: but might wanna get your story out there before they can make one up Jimmy: longer we don't, more of a #scandal it'll be Jimmy: ✔ Jimmy: I'll @ Lucas now to chuck me in isolation before they can get the 🍿 out Janis: loads of girls DYING to take your notes for you Janis: it'll be alright Jimmy: not the 🖋 bit I'm bothered about Janis: you know they're crap liars and storytellers Janis: no 🏆👏 Jimmy: yeah Janis: what do you want to do? Janis: fuck them Jimmy: I don't know Janis: you don't need to work it out now Janis: you can sleep on it Jimmy: what do you wanna do? Janis: I wanna stay with you Janis: whatever you're gonna do Jimmy: [coming to hug you IRL because that's adorable and we love you] Janis: [OTT being like EWW get off me @Bobby for his sake but secretly giving him a loving squish] Jimmy: [kissing you on your head gal like we did when you were drunk at the other park and you can't stop us] Janis: ['nerd' but full of love] Jimmy: ['you' likewise] Janis: [Bobby probably wants to go get Libi though so we're gonna have to be like no no] Jimmy: [casually ruin the mood there bab] Janis: [whisk you away to make pizza 'cos not got time to explain that ban] Jimmy: [we'll all have fun messing about doing that at least] Janis: [even if we're now distracted by these thoughts, we trying] Jimmy: [he'll be knowing and trying to distract you by being a cute nerd, don't worry girl] Janis: [where should we skip to next?] Jimmy: [we could do them in school tomorrow because he's blatantly gonna go even though he should have more time off] Janis: [yeah I'm down for that, you would've actually brought your uniform gal so you can lol] Jimmy: [easy way to also sow the Harry seeds too] Janis: [you've probably missed a practice or two so we can totally get back on that train honey, maybe we should do that in another convo so we can do the Billie and Grace though, 'cos there might be things said that are relevant going forward at least somewhat?} Jimmy: [true yeah we do need to those first realistically]

[punkscowardschampions]

Junior & Nancy

Gay nerds

Junior: Nance, how on earth are you tackling this art project? To say I'm discombobulated is an understatement that isn't getting me an A any time soon! Nancy: 😕 sums it up in a way. Obviously I can fall back on the twin thing but is that too safe? 😩 But we couldn't be more different Junior: 😖 Like, I love how vague and open to our own interpretation it is...but also I fucking hate how vague and open to our own interpretation it is! 😢😂 No one would blame you; least of all me, 'cos I was tempted- being the sore thumb I am when counting our ten- and I've not even got the twin angle everyone is so about in all areas of art tbh Junior: If nothing else, Buster is a willing participant in a photo op always? Junior: Ooh, you could get something matchy match from your childhood photos (I know they exist) and splice it with portraits of you now...Think that elevates it Nancy: You've put your finger on it. Nancy: But I don't think you're so right about the lack of blame 🤔 even with the boy/girl straight/gay redhead/brunette angle it still feels ??? Nancy: Basic 😒 Junior: I get you Junior: Meant to become the next Magritte in just 4 weeks, like !!! Junior: Well, I've heard at least 4 girls from class saying they're going to do a heavily made-up portrait next to a #nofilter #naturalbeauty one so Junior: We'll do better than that by default but I'd like to come up with something vaguely original still Junior: Miss' sanity relies on us lowkey, no pressure 😷😜 Nancy: I had that passing thought let it go though 😜 Nancy: You could text her Nancy: 😕 yes pressure Nancy: What to do? Junior: I like to keep it in professional hours Junior: for her sake, she gets a bit amorous when she's had a glass o vino after work Nancy: 😮 she does? Nancy: can I bribe my way to top of the class by raiding the cellar Junior: That was my second suggestion 😏 Junior: Take one for the team please 🙏 Nancy: but she's straight STRAIGHT Nancy: couldn't be enough Nancy: back to the mindmap Junior: Damn straights 😒 Junior: if all else fails, we can put this grade next to our last Junior: break the fourth wall, v meta Nancy: our school gets the one bohemian who is Nancy: put her next to the sterotypical art teacher Junior: did you mean my mother? 🤔 Junior: her, the engineer, hilarious 😂 Junior: Mum'd be up for it, you may borrow her Nancy: I might yet Nancy: when's this due again? Junior: we've still got 3 weeks, don't worry Junior: just trying to get it over and done with here Nancy: I should Nancy: The Tempest essay is due soon Junior: Don't remind me, even the gayness can't make it enjoyable, like many a teen show 🤷 Junior: Could combine? Somehow? Umm Junior: The supernatural characters and the humans...why yes, I am clutching at straws Junior: This term is killing me Nancy: If I'd get away with handing in some shots instead of an essay I would Nancy: not happening Nancy: 😩 Nancy: What ideas have you had? For the juxtaposition...forget the tempest Nancy: burn that Junior: If only, 1000 words=1 photograph, no contest really Junior: again, if only Will had 💀 Junior: The idea I can't get out of my head, even though it has been done to death so is BEYOND basic, is mashing up a classical art piece with something modern and pop culture...to say something about me (eww!) Junior: Tbf, they usually use Renaissance or very very famous art pieces so I could win points by using some relevant surrealism/ going beyond calling Mona Lisa #flawless Junior: Its all I've got Nancy: I think it's good Nancy: Let's both run with overused concepts and make them not basic in our way Nancy: act like we planned it Nancy: nobody has to know we had no other ideas Junior: Absolutely 😎 Junior: Total confidence is key, comes so natural to the both of us, like Junior: I think worrying about being 'original' is the true hack thing to do here anyway 💅 Nancy joined the chat 13 hours ago Nancy: 😖 yes Nancy: stealing that all Nancy: now if you could keep it going and give me some thoughts on shakespeare to plagiarize 😜 Junior: If I could, I would but even SparkNotes isn't helping me Junior: shall we peruse the best film/stage adaptations? maybe tomorrow night if you're free Nancy: I've seen the 2010 version a few times for obvious reasons Nancy: but yeah the others not so much Nancy: we need to do something that isn't me asking my mum for help Junior: Oh, babe 😂 that's the real tragedy here, you doing that to yourself Junior: maybe I'll borrow her and she can do mine for me Junior: still down for a movie night obviously Nancy: 🙉 Nancy: Lead female character Nancy: Shakespeare should've Nancy: Please do take her Nancy: mum swap 😂 Junior: As much as Bill LOVED any excuse for a drag show darling... stick with the evil queens and witches 😘 Junior: Let's do this, full family swap! Let them drive you insane for a bit whilst I live the life 😬 Nancy: Switch that around both my parents are so type A Nancy: Plus you've got all the brothers and sisters to dodge behind Nancy: Buster takes more heat off than most but he's still just one boy Junior: well, mine would refuse to be bound to a type, just as annoying I promise Junior: Its true I can mostly fade into obscurity with all their shenanigans, yet it still somehow isn't the case, just 12 nosy people in your business instead of the usual 2, with a disinterested brother flexing off in the background Nancy: 🙈 Nancy: I'm not having kids Nancy: Don't care if the future wife is frantic Junior: It is an issue that divides all of us tbh Junior: I don't think I'd mind one, to put all my efforts into Junior: but unlikely Junior: unless I co-parent from the sidelines with your wife Nancy: weirder scenarios have come about Nancy: I'd prefer a kitten Junior: steal one when you come over Junior: Ma'd probably notice but really, do we need so many? Nancy: Gran's such a dog person can I get through the door Junior: True, true Junior: Always living on such extremes this fam Junior: I don't know 😏 Nancy: look at me and my brother ultimate homo and hetero Nancy: embarrassing Junior: 😂 Junior: I'd love to suggest he doth protest too much but lbr Nancy: dad's never been prouder 😂 no teen pregnancies for his little girl Nancy: shakespeare would write that Junior: Who are we putting our money on to go first Nancy: that's harder than it sounds Junior: Rio is obvious choice but I sometimes think Grace might go insane and come along and take the claim Junior: *Shudders* Nancy: change the subject I beg you Nancy: I'd rather hear about your attempts to avoid your secret admirer who's a girl and hopelessly 💘 Junior: well, I would rather pretend that was not a thing 😬 Junior: as your brother once eloquently put it, when he was very pissed, 'i could clean up and get untold amounts of pussy' Junior: and that's that on that Junior: considering getting a face transplant 'cos my off-putting demeanour is not doing enough 😒 what problems to have, eh? the privilege of it all! 😂 Nancy: maybe we should go under together Nancy: moral support and potential discount Nancy: if I get told I don't look gay one more time I'm returning my badge Junior: well, where is your crewcut and tank top, like? 🤔 Junior: out here confusing the masses like that, idk Nancy: 🙉 Nancy: Not an identical twin playing tricks either how dare I Junior: why can't you just get in your box and like it, god damn it Nance! Nancy: unrelated except about boxes but should I get some new kit for this project or am I just stalling Nancy: a memoir Junior: any excuse 😜 Junior: but yes, do it Junior: i'm using it as excuse to go 'round all the best art galleries in town again so Nancy: Can I tag along Nancy: they're so quiet it's everything Junior: Naturally Junior: We're art students, we've gotta act like it, I'll keep the pretentious commentary to a minimum if you keep the equally as pretentious 'grams down too 😘 Nancy: I'll try Nancy: The feed wants what it wants though Junior: Can't argue, just leave the real money outta the shot Junior: Gotta leave my fangirls wanting more, like 😂 Nancy: That I will promise Nancy: Not trying to be mobbed by straight girls Junior: You mean you resist the lesbian stereotype of LOVING that too?! Nancy: Somehow it's managed Junior: no mean feat, one of the few gays in the village Nancy: Don't clap it's too loud 😂 Junior: *Finger clicks like this a slam poetry night* Nancy: Thank you Nancy: [sends a selection of childhood pictures] how early years can I go before everyone's rolling their eyes Nancy: Thank you too mum for these. Why did you do this to us? 🙈 Junior: Awww what 👼 Junior: This is how I like to remember Buster, before it all went wrong... 😉 Nancy: 👶🥕 Nancy: The glory days Junior: Weren't they just? Junior: At least you didn't have an extra older sister to dress you up, that's worse...the photos I could bring out, good lord 🙄 Nancy: 😜 And I wasn't that sister. You've welcome Buster Nancy: 🍀 Junior: *Whispers* Can we agree he needs SOMEONE to give him a makeover tho Nancy: I volunteer you as tribute Nancy: I've tried Junior: Maybe next family gathering Junior: if he shows Nancy: Bide your time Nancy: birthday present failsafe idea Junior: the amount of birthday celebrations in this fam is unholy Junior: We have a better social life than I would ever wish for, ugh Nancy: don't make me think about it Nancy: I'm sharing and it's made no difference Junior: wouldn't want you to miss out on all that good good attention we all crave 😂 Nancy: 🙈 Junior: Speaking of attention, have you heard the latest gossip that has piqued our peers? Nancy: You tell me Nancy: I can't think of anything off the top of my head Junior: Mark Colm Junior: a massive gay? Junior: I can't make up my mind if they're just hysterical and he's just a bit camp Junior: or there's something in it Nancy: He's one of us Nancy: Definitely crushing on the headboy I've seen him looking Junior: Isn't everyone? Junior: Even the teachers, complete popularity contest got him that position Junior: Interesting, though... Nancy: Besides me in my minority of one Nancy: And Sian would never Junior: Sian Gaffney? She's never gay! Thought you didn't do straight girls, you're reaching there Nancy: 🙉 not her she's dating the oldest Keenan lad Jake? Blake? idk Nancy: She'd love to ride half our class anyway Junior: Ohh you mean Mrs Kelly, duh Junior: yeah she's one of the only decent teachers about, doesn't seem like she goes in for all that popularity politics Nancy: No she doesn't Junior: Seems like a good place to while away a lunchtime Nancy: don't tell everyone how fun it is there'll all wanna join me Nancy: not ready to say goodbye to my happy place Junior: I think your secret is safe from the masses, even if I suddenly got uncharacteristically chatty Junior: Even the ones that don't take the piss and are relatively decent human beings Junior: still rather go get a nandos or whatever it is they do Nancy: Yeah I'm an open book if anyone asks 😂 Nancy: I'll stick with the one stereotype I'm okay with embracing, my eager vegetarianism Nancy: No offence lads Junior: Its all kale and charitable acts with this one Junior: No ulterior motives at all 😏 Nancy: just a rich girl with more wealth than she can give away 😜 Nancy: nothing else to see here Junior: mhmm okay 👌 Junior: we'll pretend I don't know you better than that Nancy: Hey you don't know everything Junior: True Junior: are you in the mood for telling? Junior: 🤔 Nancy: Sometimes Nancy: Can't put it all in my art Junior: not if you don't want Miss to think you're trying to tell her something Junior: flattered but straight, like Nancy: She's not the one Nancy: She'll be flattered to hear Junior: Indeed Nancy: When there is someone it'd be nice to talk about it Nancy: Sometimes like I said Junior: Well, you know where I am Junior: When there is someone Nancy: But I wouldn't know where to start Nancy: I can't put words to it ?? Not the right ones Junior: That's not just you Junior: If I'm to understand all the songs and poetry professing they too have no words Junior: Can but try 🙂 Nancy: Helpful Nancy: What about you? Headboys to one side. Any crushes? Junior: No, no Junior: No point, is there Nancy: Doesn't mean there's a way to stop yourself Nancy: Wish I could just No at myself Junior: I don't know, I don't find it too hard Junior: but you're out so its different Junior: I wouldn't want to go out with anyone...even if Mark is a gay Junior: what would he want with me Nancy: You're a catch Nancy: Out or not he'd be punching above his weight to have you Junior: I don't think there's any point being with someone if you can't be open with it Junior: Being a dirty little secret isn't going to feel good for either party Nancy: For some people it feels worth it Nancy: Just to be with, or around them Junior: Perhaps Junior: Safe to say I don't feel that deeply for any lad here so yeah Junior: keeping on my shelf for now, like Nancy: There's a junxtaposition, us on our respective ledges Nancy: I can't remember what being happily single is like Nancy: Another lesbian stereotype for the list Junior: Don't, how depressing 😂 Junior: I am not about that angsty teen art life Junior: How do we get you a lady? Junior: Do we have to hit the clubs? Nancy: 🙈 Nancy: No no no Nancy: Give that up for a bad job and worse idea Nancy: I'm too picky Junior: You're speaking to me Junior: vowed a celibate here Junior: we can do this for you Nancy: We can't Nancy: Leave me in my rut Junior: Fine fine 😋 Nancy: I'll be in my dark room angsting 😂 Junior: Noted Junior: I'll drag you out for museums and Tempest film marathon tomorrow, yeah? Junior: 'Til then madame Nancy: Looking forward to it Nancy: Stay inspired 💚 Junior: Stay golden 💛