#tf2 engineer headcanons

[doodlydoodlies]

I headcanon that Engineer is more introverted than most of the other mercs realize

Image: Cut-out of Pardner Polo (Monday) from Steam Community Workshop

[4oh4blognotfound]

Engie headcanons for @sad-catbrick

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Collects rocks! But not in the way where you go out and buy them, but in the way where he sees a shiny rock somewhere while he’s on a mission, picks it up and pockets it.

Collects ornamental knives and keeps them on a shelf in his workshop!

Cooks really good bacon and makes a mean biscuits and gravy!

Has a small succulent named Harry that he’s been spoiling for years now.

[megaarn]

TEEN FORTRESS!!

I had the idea of designing what each merc looked like at 18, so heres my take on it! this was such a fun project, im thinking of making a comic based off of it...

[homkamiro]

Whatever. Throws you my headcanons

[anonomi]

Various gifs of how I think the mercs smile (Defense ver!) ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

RED Demo - He's quite cheery! He's always in high spirits (just like the gibs he blows up) and his smile is just as happy. Physical embodiment of this here :D

BLU Demo - Has a bad case of RBF (he is often thinking about the kills he whiffed) but he's a charmerrr <3 his smiles are s-m-o-o-t-h

RED Heavy - Big, BIG smile - he often gives this smile before mowing a person down or giving them a big hug. Hope it's the latter!

BLU Heavy - More quiet and reserved and more likely to frown, but he's always happy to pass a small, quick smile to let you know, you're doing good

RED Engineer - Usually he's milling about with a tune on his lips, but once he sees you, he'll give a sweet, if a bit shy (if a bit embarrassed), smile

BLU Engineer - Big thinker whenever he's not running around moving his buildings. His smile's always a little off-guard but never unwelcoming (unless you're a spy)

[ruthytwoshakes]

happy pride everybody, hope you had a good one! And I hope everybody's excited for disability pride month this July :)

We can't forget our friends and family in Palestine during the celebrations. There is no Pride in Occupation. And happy pride to our family in Palestine, we won't forget about you. Stay strong and fight like hell. I love you.

donate to the fundraiser below and join your local Palestine solidarity group. Hani Al-Sharif, his wife, and five children need to evacuate. They are very far from their goal. Any amount helps.

[father-killjoy]

As someone who’s lived in the Deep South their whole life, this drawing of Engie as a lil kid personally offends me.

I don’t know who that boy is, cause I know for a fact Engie was a chubby lil redneck child shooting at beercans and small animals with a BB gun he built himself.

[kregaharten]

I like how my style is not consistent within merely an hour and no gaps between.

So, some headcanons for the Blu team I don’t want to arrange it I only got 2hr left of eepy time before presentation.

You know what I think blu soldier have hoarding disorder too after rethinking about WAR! scene.

[mothhivequeen]

I have a headcannon that Engineer here can speak fluent Spanish but it's the really bad accented Texarkana spanish white people near the border speak. The man sounds like Hank Hill speaking Spanish. Iykyk

[sparkly-sediment]

Speeding bullet headcanons

In light of comic 7

The gaggle of children frolicking about? Target practice

Nerf wars in this home go HARD. The destruction of peace at the hands of a foam bullet

Scout wants to be as good a parent as his Ma. So, whenever something happens, he responds whoever he thinks his Ma would

Sniper points out that while he loves Scout’s Ma, maybe the kids shouldn’t practice gang fights. Just a thought

They both love the children very deeply. Once Scout is living life as a single father and reconnects with Sniper, Sniper just kinda moves in and starts doing the kids hair in the morning

Adopt-a-dad

Small children love chaos and starting fires and climbing trees and these guys are not able to resist the temptation

Sniper channels his dad to discipline the kids (which causes him to look inwards at how his dad fucked him up) and Scout is surprisingly a natural at gentle parenting

This rambunctious, poor-decision making young man transform into a wonderful and present father. Kids have a school play? He’s there front row screaming. Kid misbehaving? He’s explaining their behavior and how to better respond next time

Scout takes all of them out individually to play ball and it heals something deep within him

Totally wrapped around each individual tiny finger tho LMAO Scout WILL buy it for them and Sniper WILL take them there

They go on family nature outings ❤️ Sniper teaches the kids survival skills and Scout carries them when they get tired from walking

Scout works out using the kids as weights

They build family forts and tree houses!!

AKA Sniper builds them and Scout sword fights the kids with branches

It’s a very sweet domestic bliss. Scout and Sniper both deal with PTSD from the gravel war and rely on each other to get through it

When Spy visits they give the children sugar first 😈

When the mercs visit the kids have a sit down talk after about why we can’t act like that

Sniper and Scout fighting with 23039483727171 children about why they can’t have a baboon even yes uncle Medic has one

Privately they question if Medic is related to the monkey

[ashersbunker]

Soldier hc part 4: Self-destruction.

Whenever Soldier feels stressed he'd rather exhaust his body so he can feel "productive", and also distract himself from his thoughts.

He's grown with the "take it like a man" mentality, so when he's not, he starts to destroy himself mentally.

-> Previous

[doodlydoodlies]

Headcanon: Engineer tends to overcomplicate things

Image: Prof. Issions from Steam Community Workshop

[zlaurent]

Engineer? What about Engiqueer

[dududisdudusdu]

Good old RedOktoberfest because I'm a tf2 yao(LMAO) enjoyer 👨🏻‍⚕️👨🏼‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻🏋🏼‍♂️

[literallypyro]

Three (mostly) random headcanons for all the mercs!

Warnings: none

Genre: fluff, angst if you squint

Scout:

-He can cook, but only WITHOUT a recipe. Look, I know he's illiterate, so just imagine someone's reading it to him, mkay? Idk what it is, but when he has to follow a recipe, it ends in disaster. Let him wing it, and you'll think you're at a 5 star restaurant.

-Tells his mom all about you. She basically knows everything about you, and it's not because she asked.

-Total malewife. What you say GOES (unless you tell him to stop buying Bonk. That's a losing battle, toots. When has a little radiation ever hurt anyone?)

Soldier:

-While this man is virtually never quiet, he's noticeably the least loud around you. Unless you feed into his loudness. If that's the case, may God have mercy on the rest of the team's souls.

-He isn't book smart, and with a lot of people, emotional intelligence isn't really his strong suit either. But around you? It's like this mf has a sixth sense. It's almost concerning. You CANNOT hide your emotions from this guy.

-Please for the love of all that is American, take this man to a chiropractor. I know he's used to rocket jumping, but that's precisely the issue. He doesn't even realize how fucked up his joints are.

Pyro:

-Actually the sweetest ever. Just cuz they're crazy doesn't mean they aren't the silliest hopeless romantic ever. Can't kiss you through the mask, but will damn sure try. They have left a print on your cheek from pressing their mask into it before, and they will do it again.

-If someone disrespects you, they will be catching Pyro's hands. The flamethrower will be saved for when the idiot who insulted you can't use any of their limbs.

-CLINGS to you when it's bed time. You'll have to wait until they fall asleep if you want out of their grasp (but why would you?)

Demoman:

-Never short on stories. If you're bored, just say so, and he already has five stories in mind that he hasn't told you yet. Sometimes he laughs a little too hard and it takes a minute to get back to the story.

-PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE compliment this man. We see how quickly he can swing between insecure and confident. Additionally, he would absolutely adore any eye patches you make him. If you make him multiple, he's switching them out every day. Make ones for specific occasions, and bro is at your mercy.

-If you can out drink him, or even just keep up, he's lowkey worried about you. He knows he has a problem. He's actually pretty realistic about it. He WILL be asking if there's something you want to talk about at some point.

Heavy:

-He knows you don't need to be protected at all times, but he has a hard time letting you defend yourself. Just look at the way he grew up. A big chunk of this man's personality is just "bodyguard to loved ones". You will have to bring his attention to it if you want him to back off, and as soon as you do, he listens. It's mostly out of habit, if I'm being honest.

-Lord help anyone who makes you uncomfortable. He gets such a threatening look on his face as he asks the person questions that don't SOUND like threats, but they damn sure feel like threats.

-Oh, you thought he wouldn't go out of his way to write translated versions of his Russian books so you can read them when he's not around? Well you're WRONG. If you ask if he has translated versions of his books, he won't tell you he was the one who translated them, but you recognize his handwriting.

Engineer:

-This guy will grill out every single day if you ask him to. Burgers? Got it. Hot dogs? Easy peasy. Smoked ribs? Don't gotta ask him twice! Mans will make sure every craving you have is satisfied, or may lightning strike him where he stands.

-He has already memorized your schedule. You were about to take a shower but- it's already on? No one's in there??? And it's at the perfect temperature???? Not to mention how your laundry was mysteriously folded when you were too tired to do it all at once... Safe to say, even though it was unintentional, he has committed every single one of your habits to memory like a tattoo.

-This man is a thinking, breathing jukebox. Can play literally any song from any genre off the top of his head. He can also easily convert songs to different genres.

Medic:

-He actually has amazing handwriting when it comes to signatures. The only reason he writes like a stereotypical doctor is because he wants to be able to switch up last second if he needs to.

-You are one of the very few people he trusts to watch his birds, and it's because he knows you know how he is. Did you forget about the whole baboon uterus thing? Surely not.

-Actually surprisingly careful with you. He'd be mentally punching himself if the rib thing with Heavy happened to you. Even owns your soul so the devil can't try to use you against him.

Sniper:

-Your are literally the only reason he would sleep in the base at night, but he REALLY prefers you sleep in the camper with him. He's kinda clingy, but not to Pyro's extent. Seeing how he is with everyone else, he obviously understands personal space.

-Secretly has the voice of an angel. He has intense stage fright about it, though, so NOBODY is about to find out.

-If you're scared or over-cautious of animals, he's definitely gonna fix that. He'll ease you into it, but given the time, you will have pet and fed every animal he can get his hands on.

Spy:

-We've all seen how much of a romantic this guy is. You are getting absolutely SPOILED ROTTEN when he is around. Hold his arm anytime you want. You want flowers? Tell him which ones, what color, and from where, darling. Can't dance? Well, he's pretending not to notice. He gazes at you lovingly, and you can't even tell he's in immense pain from you stepping on his feet.

-Has every high end cologne and has a different one for every occasion. This guy has SO MANY. He even has different ones for different restaurants. You could consider it a hyperfixation if you wanted to.

-You are his queen/king/monarch and WILL NOT let you forget it. Tells you every single day, sometimes multiple times a day how important you are to him and how much he cherishes you. Who cares if the team is around? They're just mad he got to you first, ma beauté.

[whaleofatjme1920]

How Much I Would Trust the People of TF2 at Pools with Me and How Much You Should Trust Them Too

I'm a lifeguard, lifeguard instructor and swim instructor you should definitely trust me

Reblogs are appreciated!!

Scout

6/10

I think he can swim surprisingly well. Like, not any actual stroke but he can stay alive in water.

Going to start splash wars. It's a mess. He will also play chicken with people and cheat while doing so.

Yeah he brings a lot of diving toys. Good luck. Fails to bring goggles and complains about chlorine in his eyes. Bit of a mess innit.

DOES NOT WEAR SUNSCREEN and gets burnt. Badly. He will be complaining about it for DAYS after the fact.

Soldier

5/10

Jane can absolutely swim. Just not... gracefully.

Acts a lot like those dogs that jump on their owners thinking they're drowning and just wants to help.

Will have a cannonball contest only if you say it's in the good of America.

Does enjoy 4th of July pool parties and LOVES flamingo and donut floaties. He and Zhanna like to rest on them together.

Pyro

2/10

Pyro doesn't really like swimming but isn't like, a hater of water.

Pyro would definitely hang out on the side and dip their feet in the water, kicking every now and then.

Usually naps in a lawn chair. Or, if on a beach, they'll build sandcastles and have lots of fun.

Sometimes will rest on a floatie. Likes water wings (water wings aren't safe). Likes sun bathing (plz make them wear sunscreen anyways).

Demoman

8/10

Literal selkie. I'm being so fr. He's a literal sea captain so. Man loves water.

Only reason he's an 8/10 is bc he likes to drink while lounging on the side of the pool and might need to be rescued at one point or another.

BUT he's really fun to play games with. Will jump in and have splash contests just as much as he wants to nap while laying on a floatie.

He will tell you nautical tales and legends from around the world. Great storyteller, and amazing at weaving tales of merfolk.

Heavy

9/10

makes sure everyone is wearing sunscreen and that the sunscreen is reapplied at safe intervals.

Likes to wear sunglasses and lounge around for a bit, but will actually legitimately swim. His breaststroke is actually pretty good. Butterfly is debatable.

He's going to keep tabs on everyone in the pool to make sure they're safe and not drowning.

He will also have a great BBQ. Mans the grill, doesn't let anyone touch it except for Dell, and Zhanna, He will NOT let Jane touch the grill.

Engineer

8/10

This is because he's really not swimming, more so of like, wading in the water with a cold beer in his hand but he's like your cool dad that hangs out and gets a bunch of cool stuff for the pool.

He's the one that buys or makes all the super cool floaties for the pool.

He also has towels and stuff ready for everyone. Does not want ANYONE dripping in the house so please dry off.

He will play his guitar at some point during the night after everyone's had their fun and light a fire for s'more purposes.

Medic

5/10

He's a menace in the pool. Surprisingly nimble in the water but like, a water snake or a shark, not a dolphin. He is not beneficial.

He asked to check the chlorine levels or check himself. Not because he actually cares, but because he wants to gross everyone else out.

He LOVES scaring people when in the water. He will jump up and climb up on you, and make everything hell for you.

If he isn't scaring you in the water and Jeremy isn't trying to drown him, he'll hang around the side of the pool sipping on cocktails and beer sunbathing like a lizard. This, after everyone's hounded him for wearing several layers of sunscreen.

Sniper

7/10

He's also a water dweller. He and Tavish spend a lot of time together talking in the shallow end about little myths and legends, and even have little races.

He's a very good swimmer. HIs fly is good, can't say the same for backstroke.

Water is like one of the only places he's not awkward because it's so comfortable to him. He has quite a few fond memories of his parents hanging around in the pool with him, tossing coins downwards so he could pick them up and even his father teaching him to swim.

He's a 7 out of 10 because he doesn't listen to anyone when they tell him to put more sunscreen on and he doesn't and gets BURNED.

Spy

4/10

He does not get in the water. Wears a speedo and it makes everyone uncomfortable and the balaclava but that's whatever.

He DOES wear sunscreen. Still wants to sun tan and even has a timer so he knows how long each side of him actually gets. Has sunglasses, listens to the music, and generally enjoys his time alone from everyone but also surrounded by them.

This does not stop Jeremy from splashing the ever loving hell out of him. Jeremy makes it a personal mission to mess with him.

He does end up having a water gun and does shoot Jeremy in the face with it MULTIPLE times. Might even raise his score to 10/10 tbh.

Miss Pauling

6/10

Yeah she's not getting in the water unless someone spends quite some time getting her in. She DOES know how to swim, and I think as a teen she was actually a lifeguard! but her relationship with the Administrator overworking her means she doesn't want to do ANYTHING.

I mean, she stays perpetually busy so it's everyone's personal mission to keep her phone away from her and tell the Administrator to bug off and leave her alone. So, when that happens you get her to rest on pool donuts.

She also sunbathes, but doesn't tan at all. She does cover herself in sun screen and wears a cute sun hat.

Her idea of having a nice time at the pool is with some iced tea, a good book, and enjoying the beautiful weather. She gets exactly that, minus Jeremy flirting with her, to which Spy will squirt him in the face again with his water gun.

Saxton Hale

-2/10

It's his pool everyone is using but that man makes everyone sign their soul to get in.

No one actually signs, just uses random google generated names and he can't be BOTHERED to check.

Mags also burns the contracts of anyone who actually signed. She thinks it's ridiculous that Saxton would even do that.

That said, he's not even AT the pool when everyone else is there because he can't be bothered. He wants to punch sharks. Mags will show up in a sun hat and bring a cooler of beer. She's the real 10/10.

The Administrator

-100/10

She does NOT show up. But if you manage to get her in, she hides in the shadows and hisses at the sun like a vampire.

She does NOT stop bothering Miss Pauling. Complains the whole time she's there.

She sneaks out at some point to get drunk somewhere else because everyone here was too 'low class' for her.

I don't like this woman. Stop inviting her to the party.

Zhanna

9/10

She's on the grill with Dell and they're a GREAT team together. She manages to cook everything so perfectly, people prefer her stuff to everyone else's.

She does better cannonballs than Jane. She's also a very graceful swimmer. Probably knows how to do some very basic artistic swimming skills, which she can teach you if you ask.

She likes to sunbathe as well, and likes to read as she does. I think she actually spends a lot of time with Miss Pauling, both of them resting together and enjoying the sun.

She will also drown Jeremy for him being a little shit around everyone else.

Merasmus

10/10

He summons mermaids.

What more can I say.