#well. he sure comes close a lot. it is a complicated question. but . i cannot elaborate further without completely spoiling some things | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

honeyhotteoks · 1 year ago

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i NEED your thoughts on priest!yunho like.... please, all my mind does is wonder about yunho using his power to bring a girl under his powerful spell... I NEED HIM BIBLICALLY

idk if you remember me but ✨anon is back !!!

oh my gosh hi ✨ anon!! i def remember you, i hope you've been well!

okay so priest!yunho is actually so dear to me i cannot even articulate it i have like sixteen different ideas and i honestly think at some point it will develop into a full fic however.............. further thoughts under the cut

priest!yunho x married!reader drabble; 1.7K words warnings: lots of angst, pining, and blasphemy, questionable use of a confessional, oral (f receiving)

note: okay so here's the thing about priest!yunho, and yunho in general, while i think he deeply has the capacity for very real dom/sub dynamics etc., when it comes to the idea of him being catholic or him being a priest in the fic, i think of him less bringing a girl under his spell and more being brought under a spell and tempted away by reader. certainly that's not an original idea, that's very fleabag-esque and i've mentioned that headcanon before, but i do think that would be very true to him. so given that...................

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──────────────── ♡ ─────────────── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

Yunho is new to the parish, and he's still somewhat new to this. A young priest in his early thirties moving to a new place to fill the role of someone who was once a big fixture in the community there. He's admittedly a bit nervous, and he's trying his hardest to get this right. He's had a long and complicated past coming to the vocation, and he feels like he's finally found his path, so he wants to do things the right way.

But despite all of that...... there's you. And you're married of course, you come to church with your husband, but you smile up at him during services and ask after him in quiet moments whenever you volunteer, and there's just something about the way you move in the world that makes him want to follow. But he doesn't, because you're married and for all intents and purposes so is he.

That is until things start to change. You start to miss Sunday services more often and when you are there you seem withdrawn. Your husband no longer sits snugly beside you with an arm around you shoulders, instead you sit side by side with six inches between you. Space that seems to be growing week after week, and Yunho can't help but notice. He can't help but wonder what it is that's troubling you so and driving a wedge deeply into your marriage, and it's not his place and he shouldn't ask..... but he does.

As you leave service one day, he slips a note into your palm, pressing your hand tightly closed so no one can see it and with a pleading expression he bids you not to open it until you're alone. He doesn't know what's happening at home, he can't be sure, but he's worried and if you're unsafe the last thing he's going to do is be the cause of more pain in your life.

It's simple though - a phone number scrawled out hastily next to a note. If you ever need a friend, you have one in me.

It takes you weeks to call, but it feels finally like someone's thrown you a lifeline and you grab onto it with both hands.

It starts simply enough, truly innocent when he offers you coffee and a safe place to sit by his side in the chapel. He's an ear at first, just listening and nothing more. You confess to him how hard things have been at home, how your relationship has grown strained, more like two passive strangers than a committed husband and wife. You admit you've thought about divorce, and you know deep down your husband has been cheating on you. You've seen enough little signs and found enough evidence, and it used to hurt but now it just feels empty, and you've never said that out loud to another person except to him.

He listens and he holds your hand, and he gives you a safe place every few days to just be. And all the while he tries desperately to convince himself that the growing love he feels for you isn't romantic love at all, it isn't deep and intrinsic and as essential to him as breathing.... it's friendship. And all the while you tell yourself that the feelings you have for this man aren't real, they're a product of kind attention, validation and support you're not getting at home.

Things change when the visits turn from morning coffees to a shared glass of something stronger in the evenings. Things change when he casually admits that of course he feels attraction for people, priests aren't blind, but they've committed themselves to a different kind of life. Things change when he holds you close one night, your chest wracked with tears after a particularly nasty fight with your husband, seeking Yunho's warmth and his calm.

When you finally decide to do the unthinkable, really and truly divorce your husband, the day happens around you like a whirlwind. You serve him the papers, and he replies with the most hurtful thing he ever could - an accusation that you and the parish priest have become a little too friendly. People have seen you around town, around the church, early mornings and late nights, and all the little whispers of gossip have made it so that despite having done nothing but yearn for each other, everyone has all but confirmed an affair.

The words exchanged are cruel, and you find yourself stumbling into the confessional with more anger than you've ever felt in your life. and Yunho doesn't understand why you even want to use the booth at first, you've never expressed any real interest in the more traditional aspects of the church, but you're here and your begging him and all he can do is agree.

"Bless me father, for I have sinned," You manage through hazy tears, "I can't tell you how long it's been since my last confession, I don't know, I don't remember,"

"y/n," Yunho's voice is so soft, so tender, approaching you like someone might approach a wounded animal, "you don't have to do this,"

"Stop it, stop it!" Your fists tighten, nails pressing into your palms, "Don't be nice to me right now, I can't... I don't deserve that,"

"You always deserve kindness," He says through the slats and you hear him shift in his seat.

"Not today," You scrub a hand over your face, clearing away tracks of wet tears.

"Please," He shifts again, and you can picture him clearly, leaning towards you with that gentle expression you love so much, "talk to me, I'm here,"

"I've sinned," You clench your hands tighter, sticking to the script that was drilled into you in childhood.

"y/n," He murmurs.

"Father," You cut his words off, "you're not my friend, you're my priest. Are you going to take my confession or not?"

He's silent, so silent you fear for a moment that he's gone, and then you hear a heavy sigh, "I'm listening."

Your hands relax a little, your eyes going unfocused as you try to find the words. You came here in a blaze of anger but here, next to him, in front of him, hearing his breath through the wall, you don't know how to articulate all the feelings roiling deep in your chest.

Your soon to be ex-husband's words loop in your ears - You're a disgrace. You could have fucked anyone like a normal person, but him?

Words tumble from your lips, "I'm a liar,"

Yunho stays quiet.

"I've been lying to... everyone. To him, to my friends, myself, I've been lying to you," Your breath feels thready.

"About what?" He prompts you, "I'm listening,"

You push past it, heat filling your cheeks again, anger curling in your gut, "I've coveted,"

He hums softly, acknowledging your words.

"I left him," You take a sharp inhale, a tight sob caught in your throat.

"What?" You hear him shift again on the other side of the thin wood wall.

"I got an apartment, I found a lawyer, I figured it all out and I... I gave him the papers," You can feel the way your husband pushed you back into your chair, his tone harsh and cutting, the way he told you he'd take you for everything you were worth not the other way around.

Yunho's silent still.

"I tried to leave," You sob, "I tried to be the adult and end it easily, I tried to do the right thing, he's the one who's been cheating, he's been lying. He's been... he's not a good husband, and I... I just..."

"Shh, shh," He shushes softly through the wall, and you can practically feel the tension from him even with the wall between you as he tries to parse through your words, "breathe,"

"He knows about us," The words keep coming now, and you hear his little intake of breath but there's nothing more as you let it all come, "he knows I come here, everyone knows. Everyone. He said it's obvious, that I'm the one who's been cheating, that I... I broke our vows in the w-worst way, that it's an open secret. Everyone thinks I got b-bored, that I seduced you,"

Your heart is pounding in your ears, "And it's a rumor, it's just a rumor, but the thing is,"

You hear him shift again in the confessional next to you, the only sign he's still here.

"I do want you," You drop your head into your hands, "I've lied to you since the start, I wanted a friend, but I've wanted you too,"

"y/n," He's so quiet you almost miss it.

"And if everyone thinks what they think," You're dizzy, blood rushing in your ears, "then it's true, only I never, we never... I've ruined your life and mine and I've never even gotten to really touch you, and it's wrong, I know it's wrong, but you're all I think about. It's killing me, this is killing me, and I can't,"

The door to the confessional is suddenly open, your words dying on your lips as the equilibrium of the little room changes. He's on you in a second, dropping to his knees before you, gathering you close in his arms and his lips on yours like he's done it a thousand times before. He presses up into your space, your legs parting open as wide as the narrow walls allow to slot his body perfectly between your thighs.

You suck in a harsh breath against his lips, tears still caught in your throat, and Yunho shakes his head, his forehead leaning against yours as he breaks the kiss, "Shh," he eases you, "I've got you,"

A sick, hot thrill rolls through you, "Yunho," his name a whine on your lips.

"I'm here," He whispers it like a promise, like he's yours, not God's.

His hands push at your skirt, rucking it up higher on your hips and maneuvering your body until you're slipping forward on the confessional seat with your hips tilted up.

"My sweet girl," He groans against your lips, fingers tugging your panties roughly to the side so he can slip the pad of his thumb over your swollen clit.

It's unholy, it's debauched, it's everything you dreamt up in your deepest fantasies when you touched yourself in bed, but if your life in this little town is really over you need it to have at least been real. You need him to have been real, even once. Just once.

"God," He chokes against your mouth as his fingers sink inside you, finding your slit slick and body trembling, "oh, God,"

It sounds so different on his lips, and you stifle a moan into his neck when he hits a particularly sensitive place inside you.

"Shh," He hushes you again, pressing one more kiss to your lips before he drops lower between your thighs and hitches your legs up and over his shoulders.

His tongue finds your core and you see colors. He kisses your cunt with a desperate, hungry need and you know with perfect clarity that it wasn't all in your mind. He's wanted too, he's needed you too.

His hands are hot on your hips, your fingers knotted in his hair, and you let him consume you, completely and wholly.

You come hard on his tongue, biting down on your lip enough to draw blood to stay quiet, and you think that nothing in the world would ever feel this good if it wasn't sacred.

It couldn't.

#uhhhhhh guys i think hard hours are the answer to my yunho brain rot keep it coming #ateez hard hours #yunho hard hours #yunho smut #yunho fic #yunho #ateez #jeong yunho

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littledrummeraussie · 2 years ago

Text

tell me all the things that you couldn't before.

masterlist. | want to be added to my taglist?

warnings: brief mentions of sex. a nightmare. hurt/comfort. lots of loving for Ashton. badboy!mechanic!Ashton AU.

word count: 5435

author’s note: This fic was written back in January, 2020, as part of the infamous A Permanent Chase fic, which I'm not sure will ever see the light of day as it only lives in my head and my heart.

The original concept is the following (to help you understand the fic better):

Ashton (in the beginning appearing as Fletcher) comes back to Sydney, where he starts working at Calum's garage as a mechanic. Shortly after this he meets our girl and starts to pursue her. They do start dating, but after some complications happen, and she finds out Fletcher is not the person he tells people he is, but someone else (Ashton), and she quickly breaks things up between them.

What she doesn't realize is that she and Ashton have met before, just after graduation at a beach party, where they fell in love for a night, but never saw each other again. Ashton does recognize the girl, but she doesn't recognize him for a long time, until finally Ashton does tell her the truth about their past.

The story is a mess - the original idea included gangs and street racing in which Ashton also partakes, lots of chasing after the girl in different places and scenarios, who eventually starts to put together how Ashton really loves her and actually wants to protect her from things happening around the city. (This is a huge reason why I never really worked on the story - I couldn't decide on anything, so it's just a big mess.)

They eventually make up and finally kiss at another beach party (full circle), and decide that they want to start a relationship with each other. There are lot of added stories to them in my mind, all of them following the main story above.

I also realized over the years that in some ways they are kinda toxic, but I cannot help it, I love my babies so much. So if you have any additional questions, please feel free to ask them.

Feedback and reblogs are appreciated!

-----

It was well past midnight when you realized that there was something out of the ordinary. At first everything seemed to be normal, your night started like any other: you stopped by the garage after work, parking your car just outside the building and greeted the boys who were still working there. You’ve convinced Ashton to finish early, making Calum close up for the night, and dragged your boyfriend up the stairs to his flat.

He was in a really good mood, and with a cheeky grin he pulled you into the shower with himself. His hands were searching and grabbing at whatever body parts they could reach, and after he’d promised you the best fuck of your life, Ashton picked you up to cross the tiny apartment to his bedroom, where he made good on his promise. You were lying in a tangled mass afterwards, watching the last rays of sunshine peeking through the window, painting Sydney in the most beautiful shades of pink, orange and yellow.

You were ready to make some dinner, but Ashton preferred cuddle time, and held you close to his side while he ordered Thai food from one of his favourite places. You spent the time kissing and talking about your day until the guy arrived with your order, and you ate in comfortable silence in the kitchen, playing footsie all through dinner. Usually this was the time when you went out to have fun around town, or just lay on the couch, watching the TV mindlessly, but the last few weeks have been different.

Since you’ve decided to take up some courses to help you with your work, it meant that eventually you needed to take exams on them as well. You had your doubts when you first approached Ash with the idea, but he was supportive, and in his own way, he helped you with your studying and papers. It usually meant buying you coffee or letting you rant about your problems – or ordering food when he thought you could use the extra time. And his apartment was much quieter than your noisy neighbourhood. He did not mind you staying over if it meant cuddles, food sharing and sex – all three of those happened regularly, so he did not complain.

You have already started revising notes when Ashton came up to you and gave a kiss on your neck. You leaned back against his chest, looking up at him with a smile.

“You’re going to bed?”

“Yeah, I promised Calum that I will open in the morning, since someone decided to drag me away early,” he leaned forward to press another kiss on your forehead, his red locks falling over your face. “And I don’t want to keep you away from your notes and books, which are clearly more interesting than your own boyfriend.”

“How tragic,” you laughed, turning around on the kitchen chair to wrap your arms around him. “Please file a complaint, and I will talk to the management.”

“And what will I get as a consolation prize?” he quirked an eyebrow at you.

“Blowjobs.”

“Oh, plural? That doesn’t sound so bad,” Ashton grinned at you, brushing a lock of hair behind your ear. “When can I start collecting them?”

“You know how offices work – it might take a few weeks to get an answer,” you bit your lip to hide a smile, and Ash just huffed at you.

“If it was up to you, I wouldn’t get my blowjobs for the next 30 days or so,” his fingers found a way into your tied up hair, slowly pulling out strands and combing them back into an even messier bun. “Any way to file a complaint about filing complaints?”

“I might know someone who can help you,” you tilted your head forward, pressing a small kiss on the skin of his stomach, then quickly blew a raspberry on it. “But only during opening hours.”

“You are terrible,” he laughed, grabbing your face and pulling you closer to plant a kiss on your lips. “Alright, I’ll leave you to your notes.”

“Don’t hog the blankets,” you poked his side, and Ash laughed again, pushing your hand away. “Good night, Cardinal.”

“Is that a joke on my hair?”

“You tell me,” you winked at him, and he leaned back to give you another kiss.

“Good night, you monster.”

* * *

You knew something was up when you heard noises from the bedroom. The flat was really small, with no actual doors between the bedroom, the living area and the kitchen, and at first you thought the all-nighters you pulled would bother Ashton and he wouldn’t be able to sleep with the light on in the kitchen. But he was a heavy sleeper, still and calm, and the only thing that ever broke the silence was his light snoring. But not tonight.

The first thing you heard were the rustling sheets, a pillow thumping down onto the floor, the bed creaking under his weight. There was a loud gasp, more rustling, something hitting the nightstand or the bed frame, then another loud thump on the mattress. More gasps, more heavy breathing – you could hear the panic in the way he was trying to catch his breath, choking on air, like he couldn’t get enough oxygen into his lungs.

You pushed yourself out of the chair, running to the small bedroom to check on Ashton. He was tangled up in the sheets, body twisting around as he tried to kick off the covers, thrashing in his blanket prison. His arms were swinging, trying to grab onto something (or someone), hitting the pillows and the bed with every move. He pushed his head back into the pillow, turning it left and right as he was panting, his Adam’s apple moving almost in a frantic, panicked way.

He was no stranger to nightmares – when he was exhausted or just had a bad day, he would go to bed early, resting his head on your stomach, hugging your body close to him like a pillow, and that usually did the trick. He slept soundly and without interruption. But sometimes he was just so lost in his own head that he forgot about it all, not caring about the dreams sneaking into his sleepy mind, and he usually woke with a start in the middle of the night. He would curl his body around yours, telling you that he’s okay, he just had a bad dream, he will fall back to sleep soon – he only ever asked you to hold his hand during these moments.

But tonight was different, Ashton never had a nightmare like this, one that physically shook him. He was fighting so hard to wake up, but nothing seemed to work. You dropped onto the mattress, climbing closer, and grabbed him by his shoulders, shaking him with all the strength that you had.

“Ashton! Ashton, wake up! Ash! Wake up!”

Suddenly he bolted up, eyes wide open, staring at the wall and taking in a lungful of air, making himself dizzy in the process. You shifted closer, climbing between his legs, and wrapped your arms around his trembling body. You held him close, running your fingers over his back, murmuring soft words into his ear as he buried his face in your neck, taking deep breaths, trying to calm his hammering heart.

“I’m here, Ash, it’s okay. I’m here. I’ve got you.”

He locked his arms around your waist, pulling you closer, never loosening his grip on you. You ran your hand up to his shoulder, lightly massaging his tense muscles, caressing his neck, brushing your fingers over his hair. His skin was cold and sweaty, his hair wet and sticking to his forehead. His breathing was slowing, and you moved your head to press a small kiss on his temple. He tensed for a second, but then melted into your arms once again.

“It’s alright,” you whispered, still stroking the red locks at the back of his head. “It’s over. It was just a dream, it’s over. I’m here. You’re awake. It’s okay.”

His breath was hot on your neck as he inhaled deeply, nuzzling his face back into your skin. His muscles were slowly relaxing, but he was still tense and sweaty, and a shiver ran through his body. He tried to burrow closer to get more of your warmth, and you let him stay in your arms like this for a few more minutes. When you could feel he was a bit more relaxed, you pulled back a little, lifting his head up to look at you. His eyes were glassy and unfocused, and it took him a few seconds to get out of his daze.

Ashton’s gaze skipped over yours, instead focusing on the chain hanging from your neck. The silver ring he gave you almost a year ago was hooked on a thin necklace, the weight of the metal resting between your breasts, a comfort you never knew you needed. You still remembered the time when he wore it on his finger, playing with it whenever he started getting nervous. He called it a good luck charm, something he desperately needed while he was chasing after you. But once he got hold of your heart, he gave it to you – since then it became something much more than just a piece of jewellery. For you: a reminder; for others: a warning.

His clumsy fingers wrapped around the ring, slightly tugging on it. You slowly tilted his head up again, trying to catch his eyes. His hazel ones finally found your gaze, and you gave him a small smile, lightly running your fingers over his stubbly jaw.

“Hey, you’re okay?”

Silence, then a nod.

“How about you go and take a shower? Get warmed up,” you rubbed his arms, trying to warm his still cold skin. “And I will change the sheets.”

Another nod.

Ash let go of your necklace, slowly peeling himself out of the bed, starting to go to the bathroom, then stopped, looked back at you. You gave him another encouraging smile, nodded at him that it’s okay, you both will be fine, after which he finally made his way out of the room. When the lock clicked and the shower started up, you let out a breath you were holding back. A thousand questions were running through your mind, but you didn’t want to take too much time thinking about them. You wanted to make sure Ashton was comfortable after his nightmare, that he can come back and relax into the bed, wrapped in your arms, and sleep off this horrible experience.

You started stripping off the sweat soaked sheets, pulling out a fresh set from the drawer, working methodically in changing them. After that you opened the window, letting in fresh air, the slight breeze clearing away the remaining shadows from the room. You reached into another drawer, choosing a soft pair of sweatpants for Ashton, and finally went to the kitchen, making tea, waiting for him to finish up.

The lock on the bathroom door clicked, and it opened with a slight squeak. Ash stood behind the door, a towel wrapped around his waist, water dripping on the tiles from his red hair. You stepped to him, holding the pants out for him. He took them from your hands, his fingers brushing against yours as he did, and that made him look at you.

“I made you tea,” you nodded towards the kitchen, leaning against the doorframe. “If you want some.”

“Thanks,” his voice was quiet and small, and he coughed a little to make his throat work. “I– I’ll be there.”

“Take your time.”

You stepped back to the kitchen, piling up your books and notes to shove them to the corner of the table. You knew there was no way you would go back to studying, not tonight. Any exam could wait – Ashton needed you now.

After a few more minutes he emerged from the bathroom, shuffling to the kitchen, and dropped down onto the chair next to you. He sighed deeply, then leaned forward, resting both his arms on the table, and put his head down on them, hiding his face. You watched him, how his back moved as he was breathing in and out. His muscles were still tense, you could see it from the way he was holding himself. You scooted a bit closer, and slowly put your hand on his elbow, a tentative touch. When he did not flinch away, you started to lightly rub his arm, up to his shoulder, down on his back, then back up again.

When you reached the back of his neck, Ash moved his head to the side, looking at you as you stroked his drying locks with your fingers. His hazel eyes were searching you as you were working through the tangled ends, brushing them back from his face. He let out another small sigh when you touched his face, caressing his cheek, which made him nuzzle into your hand.

“Do you want to talk about it?” you asked, resting your hand back on his arm.

Ashton looked at you for another second, then hid his face back in the crook of his elbow. You waited for him, you knew he needed time to work through the thoughts in his head, to decide if he wanted to face them again. He slowly pushed himself up, reaching for the mug in front of him, taking a sip of his cooling tea. His fingers were running over the rim, circling it mindlessly as he focused on something in front of him.

“You… left me.”

There was silence in the kitchen – his words left you speechless. It sounded silly at first; you knew how you felt about him, how first his attention was unusual, almost uncomfortable at times, and that you wished he would give you just an ounce of space; how you started to miss him when he wasn’t around, how you watched over your shoulder if he would appear somehow, stalk behind you, keeping his distance, but never taking his eyes off of you. You knew he had his reasons to do so, and you learned to love him for that – it wasn’t so hard, he found a way to your heart, and you willingly let him in. You never wanted to let go of him ever again.

“I have no intention in doing that,” you reached out to take his hand in yours, squeezing it. “And no reason.”

“But what if you do?” he whispered, pulling his hand away. “What if you find one?”

“Ash… is this something you’ve been… thinking about lately?” you asked softly, your fingers going up to your necklace, running them over the ring.

He did not answer; his eyes were still trained on the same spot as before. He was drumming on the tabletop, the rhythm getting more and more frantic and complicated. You desperately wanted to reach out and stop him, to make him look at you, to let him know you were there, you were listening, that you wanted to understand. But it seemed he was lost in his own thoughts – thoughts that brought out a nightmare that clearly shook him to the core.

“Ashton,” you said in a small voice. “Don’t push me away. Please.”

Those words made him look at you. Those words were his words, begging you to give him another chance, to make up for the mistakes he made when you met again. They were Ashton’s words, not Fletcher’s; they made you stop in your tracks, made you listen to him. They broke you in a way you’ve known you will never be broken again. That was the first time you’ve really let him into your heart, and you never wanted him to leave.

Ash sighed deeply, slowly turning around in his chair to face you, though his head was down. His fingers nervously twitched in his lap, and he started wringing his hands, looking for the rings he usually wore to play with. He once told you that sometimes he felt naked without them, and he liked wearing at least one to mindlessly spin it around, or take it off and put it back on. You moved a little closer, pushing your knees against his, slowing down his bouncing feet. Leaning forward you reached for him, pushing your fingers between his tightly clasped ones, and interlocked them. There was a slight shake to his hands, and you gently ran your thumb over his skin, trying to calm him again.

“I’m sorry,” he finally breathed, slowly looking up at you from under his lashes. “I’m just… unsure.”

“Of me?” you tilted your head to the side, trying to see all of him. He just shook his head.

“Of myself,” Ashton answered, rubbing your hands with his thumbs. “If I’m good enough for you.”

“Of course you are,” you squeezed his fingers in yours, pushing your forehead against his. “You are my Ashton. How could you not be good enough for me?”

“That’s not what everyone else thinks,” he said with a humourless laugh. “People talk, all over town.”

“Some neighbourhood gossip won’t make me leave you,” you shook your head. “What could they tell me that I don’t already know? I know you, Ash, I know who you are.”

“You have the heart of an angel, and I’m the devil who’s holding you back,” he whispered, tilting his head down.

“Maybe I’ve had enough of heaven,” your hand went to his jaw, slowly tipping his chin up to look back at you. “If hell is where you are, then I’m packing all of my bags to be with you.”

“Y/N…”

“Or maybe they have it the wrong way around,” you continued. “Cause you definitely feel like heaven to me. Maybe it’s not their definition of the place. But screw them – my heaven is all tattooed up and gorgeous.”

A blush coloured his cheek, and he moved closer to rest his forehead on your shoulder, his legs bracketing yours. You were tangled up in each other, silently sitting in the kitchen for a few minutes, Ashton’s hand on your thighs while you played with the hair at the nape of his neck. Then he slowly pulled back, rubbing his eyes – was it tears, or sleep, you didn’t know – and looked back at you again.

“Your parents still hate me,” he added, resting his elbow on the table, leaning his head against his hand.

“They hate everyone,” you answered with a shrug. “They even hate me. That’s not an accomplishment.”

“I’m sure they would prefer anyone else over me,” he searched you with his eyes. “Someone who can give you a real future.”

“What do you think, what does a girl need?” you quirked an eyebrow at him, and it was his turn to shrug.

“Financial security?” he asked, and when you rolled your eyes at him, he continued. “Someone like that guy you work with – what’s his name? Liam?”

“A suit and tie?” you shook your head, putting your hands on his knees to lean closer. “Really, Ash? When I can have you, your jackets and chains, and the fire red Mustang? Well, tough luck, because you’re stuck with me for good.”

“But am I enough for you?” Ashton sighed, reaching for you and holding your face in his hands, making you really look at each other. “I wanna give you the world. Hell, I wanna give you the galaxy. The universe. But I’m just this guy, fixing cars and running my mouth at people. And you… you’re smart and beautiful and could get anyone you set your eyes on.”

“And that’s you,” you nuzzled your face against his hand, looking at him pleadingly. “You’re the only one I want.”

“What if Liam asked you on a date? Or one of the guys at that course? What if you get along so much that you realize that you could just… do better than me?” his gaze slipped down to the ring resting against your chest, saying the next words looking at it. “You know I would do anything for you… but I know I can’t keep you forever.”

“Ash, how long have we known each other?” you asked, reaching for him, brushing his hair behind his ear.

“7 or 8 years. Dunno. Why is that important now?” he sighed, shaking his head.

“What do you think… how many guys did I date during that time?” you questioned him, but did not wait for an answer. “Only two. And you wanna know their names?”

“Please don’t kick me when I’m already down,” he whispered, but you’ve had enough.

“They are Fletcher and Ashton. They are you, Ash. I might have had a few flings and one night stands, and sure, I went on a few dates with guys. But it was only ever you I had a real thing with. It was only you who was ever good enough for me.”

“Then why did you even go on those dates if you didn’t want anything from them?” the question left Ashton before he could stop himself, and you could see him flinch when he realized what he’d said.

“I wanted to know how I felt about other people. I wanted to give myself a chance, see how we could work out. You know – if you never try, you’ll never know,” you shrugged a little while reaching for his hand, slowly interlocking your fingers with his. “And I– I think I wanted to know how you would react.”

“Remember the hole in the wall?” he quirked an eyebrow at you, and you needed to stifle a laugh.

“I was always waiting for you to show up during your dates,” you confessed, squeezing his hand in yours. “You know, just crash them. I wanted you to crash them. I know it took me a long time to let you in…”

“Well, half the time you were mad at me,” he said, leaning closer and resting his forehead against yours. “For one reason, or the other.”

“And in the other half I desperately wanted you to kiss me,” you finished, nuzzling your nose to his.

“You know I would have done it in a second,” he breathed. “I wanted to walk up to every single one of those guys and tell them that you’re… that you’re…”

“Come on,” you whispered, licking your lips. “Say it.”

“Mine.”

“Don’t think I was never asked on dates at my job or at school,” you gazed at him while saying the next part. “I was, numerous times. You know what I say to them when they call me pretty? Thank you, my boyfriend thinks so too. Or when they invite me for coffee? Thanks, but Ash is already bringing me some. And when they don’t want to let it go, I say: trust me, you do not want to meet him.”

“Are you really saying those things?” he asked you, and you nodded.

“I’m also implying that I’m having the best sex of my life, and I don’t plan on giving up on that,” you finished with a smile.

A moment later Ashton started laughing – it was his first real laugh of the night, and he hid his face, trying to stifle his giggles. It was the most beautiful sound you’ve ever heard. Suddenly the night wasn’t that dark, but instead everything seemed to start to glow a little bit. It was Ashton’s smile, shining through the blacks, dark blues and grays of the night, warming up the chilling air around you, shifting everything back to your usual teasing, but loving normal, the one you’ve built up together.

“I love your smile,” you whispered when he finally looked back at you, still trying to catch his breath. “I know I’ve always told you that you should wipe that grin off of your face, but god, I’m happy you never did. I just… there are so many things I just love about you that I’ve thought I hated before. Like your snake tattoo, or your loud car and obnoxious sunglasses… your terrible jokes and sexual innuendos, and how you never fail to say them at the worst times… I love your stupid red hair, and…”

“My hair is not stupid,” Ash mumbled, a smile still playing at the corner of his mouth.

“No,” you shook your head, reaching once again for him to brush your fingers through his red locks. “No, it’s not.”

Ash nuzzled closer, closing his eyes for a moment to enjoy the caresses and light tugs on his hair, making a small noise that almost sounded like purring. He turned his head, brushing his lips against your wrist as you wrapped a curl around your finger, pushing it behind his ear, stroking your hand down his cheek and jaw. Hazel eyes followed the movement of your fingers until you ran your thumb over his chin, and his gaze finally found yours.

“Can I kiss you?” you asked him softly, pulling back a little to see his face.

“Are you asking for permission?” there was another small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, and a slight blush coloured his cheeks.

“Just checking if you are in the right headspace,” you returned his smile, and he nodded shortly.

“I would love that.”

Without a second thought you leaned forward, one of your hands sliding up the back of his neck and into his hair, the other one cradling his jaw, tilting his head a little to the side. His breath was hot on your face as you moved closer, cheeks and noses brushing, lips slowly pressing against each other – one soft, the other slightly chapped. You kissed his bottom lip, moving to the top, nuzzling closer and closer, until he opened his mouth and let you kiss him deeper, brushing his tongue against yours as you both tasted the other. Ash made a needy little sound as you nipped on his lips and kissed his chin, his jaw, brushing against his cheek as you nudged your nose against the soft skin behind his ear.

“I chose you, Ashton. I’ve been choosing you every single day since that night on the beach, and I’ll do it as long as you let me. I’m freakin’ in love with you if that hasn't been clear before,” you breathed softly, kissing the shell of his ear. “You’ve been on my mind for the last 8 years, and if that’s not love, then you have to find a better word for me, because I’m failing here, and you know I’m good with words. But you just have this effect on you where I completely lose my sanity, and I would gladly give up on it forever, if it meant I get to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Ash reached for you and wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you out of your chair, and sitting you on his lap. His hand rested on your thigh, keeping you close to his body, as his fingers ran through your hair, guiding your face to his again. It was his turn to kiss you, and he started with the softest of touches, just to feel each other’s breath on your lips, the warmness of the other’s skin, the shiver running through you when you’ve finally lost your patience. Noses and lips pushed together, and he kissed you deeply, tongue brushing against yours as you were holding onto his shoulders. His scent clouded your mind, his touch burnt your skin, and you never wanted this moment to end.

“I love you,” Ash pulled away just enough to brush his lips against yours as he spoke. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

You pressed another kiss on his temple, cuddling closer in his lap to feel as much of his skin as you could. His arms wrapped around you more strongly, and he rested his head on your shoulder, pushing his face into your neck. For a few minutes you’ve stayed like this – slow caresses on waists and backs, fingers brushing over hair and tattoos, lips leaving small kisses wherever they could.

“Come on,” you ran your thumb over Ashton’s cheek. “I think it’s time we go back to bed.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to keep you away from your studying,” he started apologizing, but you shook your head, smiling at him.

“Screw exams. You’ll always be my first priority,” you tugged a little on his hair, tilting his head up towards you. “How does that sound to you?”

“Like something I’ve always wanted from you,” Ash returned your smile, then reached for your hand to kiss your knuckles. “Thank you, beautiful.”

You climbed down from his lap and reached for him to pull him up from the chair. You made our way back to the bedroom where the sheets were freshly changed and the pillows fluffed up just as Ashton liked it. He hesitated for a moment – the nightmare was still fresh in his mind, and even after you’ve talked through everything, he was still a little bit shaken from it.

“It’s alright,” you leaned against his side, pressing a kiss on the tattoo on his arm. “I’m here now.”

“I’m– scared to fall back to sleep,” he admitted, then sighed deeply. “It’s stupid, I know.”

“No, Ash. It’s perfectly normal,” you pushed yourself up on your tiptoes to kiss his cheek. “Don’t ever feel ashamed, especially not because of your dreams. You’re human, it’s okay to fall sometimes. I’ll always be here to pick you up.”

“How did I get so lucky?” he turned to you, gathering you in his arms for a hug, resting his head on top of yours.

“Must have been that lucky charm of yours,” you answered with a smile, feeling the ring resting between your bodies.

“You are my lucky charm,” Ashton whispered, brushing the hair back from your face.

“Well, then you should definitely hold onto me.”

He huffed at you with a smile, shaking his head. You pulled him down on the bed, both of you getting comfortable under the blankets – Ash scooted as close to you as he could, nuzzling his face between your head and shoulder. You wrapped your arms around him, letting him rest his weight on you, running your fingers through his hair.

“You smell so good,” he mumbled against your skin, pushing his nose to your pulse point. “Am I not too heavy?”

“You’re perfect where you are,” you continued brushing your fingers over his curls, skimming them over the back of his neck, down his shoulders, then back up again. “How are you feeling?”

“Like maybe I will be able to fall asleep,” he breathed, then reached for the ring hanging from your neck. “Is it okay if I stay like this?”

“Your peace of mind is worth every numb limb and hours spent awake,” you kissed his forehead, then the hand holding onto the ring. “You would do the same for me. And just so you know, you make an excellent pillow.”

“You too,” he closed his eyes, resting his hand back on your side, cuddling close. “Will you… will you hold my hand? Please?”

Without another word you slid your fingers against his, interlocking them. He squeezed your hand in return, letting out one last sigh as he slowly let go of all the tension that kept him awake. His body melted against yours, muscles relaxing as his breathing evened out, and in a few minutes all you could feel was his light snoring tickling your neck. You brushed your fingers through his hair again, pressing one last goodnight kiss on his forehead before resting back against your pillows.

Ashton slept soundly in your arms, head resting on your shoulder, arm thrown over your waist, fingers interlocked on the bed. He fit perfectly against you, his weight all the comfort you needed in your life. You would have stayed up all night just to make sure he had no more nightmares, but his soft sleepy sounds slowly lulled you to sleep too. The last thing you remembered was his lips brushing against your neck as he shuffled in his sleep, and you fell asleep with a smile on your face. You knew for sure he was your forever – and you planned on reminding him of that every single day for the rest of your lives. Even if it meant chasing away his nightmares every night. Because he was worth it.

#ashton irwin #ashton irwin x reader #ashton irwin fanfic #afic: a permanent chase #series: a permanent chase #ashton irwin fanfiction #fiction time

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lacedteatime · 2 years ago

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"Lazy" is your first and only thought, really?

I've had an issue with this for a while. In the first few days of UA, Aizawa assumed that Izuku was lazy in not training his quirk, and Bakugou assumed that Izuku had been hiding his quirk.

These conclusions are lackluster.

Late bloomers are a fanon thing, so I'll leave that out, but there are multiple other explanations that the other characters could have come to if they were as smart as Horikoshi tried to write them as.

OFA was shown to break Izuku horribly. What parent would let their child use their quirk if it had that effect? Medical costs are low in Japan, but it would build up, and it would leave Izuku with permanent damage (and has, so it is a valid concern). It would have been better writing for Aizawa to have "realized" this. Bakugou canonically wouldn't due to his belief that everything and everyone revolves around him, but... Actually, Aizawa wasn't narratively written as introspective in that arc, just as someone who says a lot of things learned from experience. That isn't a true indicator of forward thinking. So perhaps this whole post is pointless.

Who cares, I'm petty.

Another reason could have been that he saw Ochako about to be crushed by the 0-pointer and had a quirk awakening, causing a minor strength quirk to evolve into a major strength quirk without the protections the body of someone who originally had such a quirk would have. This would be a less likely conclusion to come to, but it would be something a teacher might consider while wondering why a kid with no control of his quirk due to "laziness" would go to such extremes to save someone in a test for no points after not getting any points with that power. This is probably the weakest explanation because of how quirk awakenings seemed to have been thought up by the author well past these arcs, and theytherefore might not have existed in canon before their introduction.

A third reason could just be that the Midoriyas are a law-abiding family. Quirks cannot be used publicly without a license, and using OFA (Superpower to those not in the know) in private would likely destroy their apartment and the ones around it. There isn't really a way around this. The first reason combined with this one would be a very reasonable and responsible explanation for why Izuku might have not touched it outside of its activation.

This becomes a little more complicated when you factor in Bakugou and try to question his reaction, as I am doing. What comes next will likely be pointless due to how Bakugou reacted without thinking in the scenes during Aizawa's and All Night's classes (I use Eraserhead's real name because he teaches as himself instead of his hero persona while All Might teaches as his hero persona).

Once Bakugou calmed down, he could have come to the same conclusions, though he would still think Izuku had been hiding a quirk. However. Inko would know that Izuku could have been pressured into demonstrating his quirk by his peers, thus breaking him and his surroundings. She might have decided to tell Izuku to pretend he was quirkless at school. This information wouldn't be shared with Bakugou.

It would likely not be shared with Bakugou's parents either, as we have no evidence that the two moms were actually friends. That's another bit of fanon. Sure, Mitsuki was protective of Inko the one time they interacted, but who's to say that she wouldn't have been like that with any other person she just met? If they were friends, I feel like that would have been shown to push the "rivalry" message from Horikoshi. Bakugou and Izuku weren't even shown to be that close of friends either -- Bakugou was arguably closer with mini Tsubasa and finger boy.

Anyway! I'm done, I think, but feel free to come up with your own explanations characters could have considered if you want to talk about it!

My next post will be more anti-Bakugou (I know this one doesn't fit the tag too much, but if I don't include it, I might have to interact with stans), whenever that may be, but I've had this stewing for years

#anti bakugou #anti bakugo katsuki #anti bakudeku #bakugou stans dni #aizawa critical #ua critical #The reason I put Aizawa critical while I have anti Bakugou is because at least Aizawa is written as a complex character #Outside of plot convenience and being Horikoshi's mouthpiece for stanning Bakugou #But you get the point

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mdhwrites · 9 months ago

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Do you think, in fiction, characters can cross a line where it's stupid or wrong for their friend to forgive them, no matter how sincerely remorseful they are?

Yes... But it's complicated.

I know, shocking answer from me of all people. /s

Anyone who wants to say "If you do X, your character is irredeemable" is lying to you. There is no steadfast line because the circumstances for every story and every character is going to be different. If you show yourself to be a ruthless murderer to Batman, he'll disavow you forever, at least in theory. Do it with the Punisher? So long as you kill the right people, you're a brother in arms. Destroy an entire star system? Well what were the circumstances, such as potentially research being warped, ends justify the means, etc. like that.

To list specific acts is to pigeon hole stories in a way that isn't fun, useful or even all that interesting because you're trying to apply our real world to a fictional world without any consideration for its rules and logic which is just, bluntly, boring. So that begs the question: Do I have advice on this matter? Well, I do actually and it comes back to the example I gave earlier.

When you take a life, you risk creating another Batman. That is why Batman doesn't kill because his goal is to make sure no young boy suddenly loses his parents ever again. You have gone against everything he stands for... And so that's it. You can be on the same side as Batman but you cannot be Batman's friend while being a killer. I know you can bring up a lot of stuff in the comics but this is true 90% of the time and I think we can all agree with that. There is almost no amount of sorrow, or saying it was 'what had to be done' that can get around the fact that you have fundamentally offended him as a person and warped how he will ever be able to perceive you...

...Which is actually how lost friendships work in the real world. You can be friends with a criminal. You can know someone does awful things. If you still see them as your bro though, it's going to be hard for you to want to let go of someone you're already close to. We like the bonds we are familiar with and grow attached to. As such, to lose a friend, you have to fundamentally see them differently. To believe there is no reason to keep them around. Otherwise, that attachment may linger, much like how hard it can be to entirely quit an ex because you yearn for the good times, despite the bad times, because you brought them in so close as to have a label that meant so much to you at some point.

I cite Luz from The Owl House abandoning her friends to death a lot because of this element. Luz is seen as the one they can rely on, as the one they can trust, as the one who will be there for them to the very end. That even if she wrongs her friends, she would do her best to make up for it like she always has. Then she decides to not just leave them to die while keeping her safe. Not just dooms an entire world. She does so while claiming it's because she just feels so guilty about a mistake she made that she refuses to even try and fix it.

If she had ever told her friends... How do you handle that? How do you handle your friend telling you that everything you thought they were was a lie? How do you look at them the same way ever again, let alone her girlfriend amongst that group who has to deal with the fact that Luz didn't even consult with her about this matter. Just one day Luz was gonna go bye as an entire universe separated them and she would be left abandoned, alone and betrayed, everything Luz symbolized no longer being what her life had to be. How do you ever recover that relationship? How do you ever allow that sort of trust again?

This is why in media when characters have big fallouts, you'll often hear, "Oh come on, I do this all the time!" rebuttled with, "No! This is different! Look at what you did? How could you have done this? Sure, you're an asshole but I always thought you cared at least a little! I guess I was wrong." Because in that moment, the character cannot see their friend the same way. Something has fundamentally changed about their relationship and so even if they make up, their relationship is going to have to be different from what it was before. Otherwise, all you're doing is reminding the person of all the scars you've left on them.

Because the only fix to change is change, but sometimes there's no way to prove you won't become the person who hurt them in the first place. Sometimes that trust can never be recovered. But how that works will be specific to each character in a narrative because each of them should have a different view on the matter. Otherwise they're one homogeneous blob and just like how that's uncomplicated, it's also pretty boring and that's always the worst sin you can commit with a story. See you next tale.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

#writing advice #writing #creative writing #redemption

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the-weeping-dawn · 5 months ago

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YAY. I WAS HOPING YOU'D REBLOG.

Dealers choice on character, 🔫 PISTOL, ⚙️ GEAR, ☁️ CLOUD

HOLD ON I'M GOING TO CRY A SEC ACTUALLY

AND GOOD IT'S DEALERS CHOICE CONSIDERING EITHER THEY'RE EARLY IN BEING FLESHED OUT OR EXIST MORE IN TTRPG SPACE OR BACKSTORY SO IT'S THIS ASSHOLE AGAIN

🔫 PISTOL - do they trust people easily? how easily will they turn their back to someone? have they been backstabbed before? will they betray someone if given an ultimatum?

There's a reason I specifically chose loyalty as his defining emotion (trait? Regardless) because it's a rare thing for him to give. He's hardly a fighter normally, having primarily survived through social machinations, manipulation, deception, and knows how easy it is to convince others to kill one another without needing to get his hands dirty. Basically he assumes everyone trusts him as little as he'd trust himself. Not in the slightest. Being backstabbed is something I'm sure has happened, probably plenty of times, as many as he's done just the same....Really just something that's a normal part of life. In Menzobaranzan, he'd only trust a single friend, Sylfiel, fully...Something he eventually comes to regret while plans to leave that had always been floated between them over the years suddenly become something much worse. (To a lesser extent he does know he should trust his older siblings but it's...complicated...When they tend to call him the Matron's Puppeteer while plotting, well says a lot for how they see him. )

In any other situation he'd hardly have ever come to trust the people he does, and vice versa. Shadowheart and Lae'zel being as close as his (older three) siblings. And Lae'zel, probably just as complicated a relationship if anything.

For most people he comes across he makes a point to try to keep any promises, not lie where he can be caught with non-Drow on the surface. It's a survival tactic he was taught from a fairly young age (he's been brought up here and there since he was around ten give or take.) that it's already unsafe, that there's legitimate reason to mistrust Drow, and you're only getting one chance at most... It's the same currency that favours can be. And a more valuable one to have, even if he'll lie to get other's trust he can only mimic returning.

...And then there are the two people he does make the very active choice to trust.

Minthara, it's because well, that mess of contradictions, feelings long since buried and learned to ignore if inconvenient in a heart he doesn't know, can't return her unwavering faith in him, in spite of having nearly killed her before saving her at Moonrise, being the whole reason she was on trial in the first place. Knowing that when they had breifly known one another in a normal situation, neither place their guard down around the other, and even if taken as a consort, likely never would, deciding to trust her is a matter of respect more than true trust. Forcing himself to put his guard down around her does at least also give him someone he's finally able to speak more openly with, having kept (most) everyone else at arms length to that point, and even then, it's likely not until he tells her that no, he doesn't think they'll be taking the brain directly and she's willing to listen to the alternative plan given he keep and open mind and consider her plans as seriously as she is that he actually fully trusts her.

Then the other person he choses to trust, even if taking his hand with a dagger in the other

There is not a single moment that he isn't aware that he was taking a risk, several, everyone's lives even. And goes so far as to be willing to no questions ask partial certimorphosis because he wasn't going to show how much it worried him in front of the others... Where Minthara was respect it was more understanding the desperation of both sharing slots on 'bottom five races one would be willing to trust if they had options'

Ilztaun cannot have an answer where he's clearly not picking the 'I'm bald' option on a poll for anything besides about his actual hair.

⚙️ GEAR - what are your ocs thoughts on science & art? which do they give more importance to? how much value do they place on each?

This fucking liar right here. This bastard, will says he's mainly a bard because of how it makes it all the easier to distract, mold thoughts and feelings, manipulate, spy, and that's certainly how he argued cutting many options he would have as a mage off in leave The Tower and studying in Waterdeep (something hidden by spreading too many contradictory rumours for any to be trusted. People just knew he was gone for a number of years ) but it's not why, in one fo the many trips to the surface with one of his siblings the idea came to him and stuck there. He saw how even a terrible troupe of mummers could have their moments of making the crowd watching feel, understand what was being portrayed, and the idea stuck with him. He was always a naturally talented musician but also to some level as much as he did close himself off emotionally some was naturally, some was cultural, and art's ability to both be understood and make sense of others, something he did struggle with once make it an easy choice, he doesn't know how he'd have survived at all in many ways without art. ..

Oh thank god an easy one after a question I don't even know I answered or not

☁️ CLOUD - a soft headcanon

He got Minthara to eat her first night at camp, or technically Last Light by pointing out that Gale was delighted by having an actual kitchen again, one he didn't have to remove the cobwebs of himself! He also was in camp that day, doesn't allow anyone else near his cooking, and would be delighted to tell her all about the meal if she's curious what's in it.

He is not above weaponizing Gale and it's much of how Gale became the first person there she would consider a friend, down to being the one to talk him out of becoming a God.

He gets along with children and animals very easily, and better than with adults.

Did in fact let Isobel know about Squire, and if she didn't take him with her (she did) he would be glad to. Did in fact have an undead cat for a period when he was a child following his Matron killing said cat and him taking it poorly. For long enough that necromancy was a legitimate option to get him to shut up.

#DID I MANAGE TO ANSWER? AND IN THE SAME DAY? YES!#DID I ACTUALLY ANSWER THE FIRST QUESTION? MAYBE?#IS UNDEAD CAT A SOFT HEADCANON?#MAYBE?#oc: ilztaun #I was going to answer for more than him and then the first took forever since....#well it could have gone on longer.#since the answer is no. but he can fake it so long he sometimes stops faking it.#and we're seeing him in a strange situation.....#Lae'zel doesn't even know how much his ability to lie to himself saved her ass >.>#tav questions #Ilztaun Auvryvirr

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timedthirteen · 2 years ago

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* concerning yaz, graham and ryan.

the well-documented problem with these three is that ( to me, and to others i respect ) they feel like plot more than people, only speaking as is germane to the narrative, only there to make the doctor look more interesting. i've gone to great lengths to flesh them and their relationships to the doctor out, so as to earn the intimacy they say they have at various points across canon. i do not expect any portrayals of these muses to adhere to what i've written here, and if i end up writing with anyone who writes these muses, that may alter my thinking. for now, this is a good jumping-off point into how i approach these dynamics.

yaz: as i've already discussed here, yaz's chosen profession represents a sticking point between them in a world where yaz sticks to what seemed to be an authoritative, duty-bound nature. i imagine this as a broader conflict that develops throughout thirteen's first series, with thirteen going to at times extreme lengths to expose yaz to the systemic corruption inherent in the police system. it's messy, morally complicated, both of them in the wrong at times, and they both come out of it with a better understanding of each other. thirteen does not refer to her as yaz until at least the end of her first episode; for the entirety of that first adventure together, the doctor continues to refer to her as pc khan, neutral-to-disdainful.

graham: i feel that the doctor has a very close bond with graham, and that begins by connecting with him over grace's death. they have so much in common, actually, and she sees a lot of herself in him - he's (mostly) kind, curious, courageous, and at times deeply angry. he has so much left to learn, reliant on his creature comforts, and she wants to teach him. she wants to help him become the best version of himself, to transmute his grief into something better. when he expresses his fear over his cancer returning, she hugs him, tells him that she understands; she's afraid of death like she's never been before, but endings are what make anything worth doing. all they can do is to live in the now, and make the most of this time, because they never know what day will be their last. she then gives him a choice, where there is no wrong answer: if he wants to, they can pop to a future hospital, and make absolutely sure he will never have to worry about this ever again.

ryan: honestly, ryan strikes me as someone who would piss the doctor right the way off - not, obviously, because of his disability, i am disabled, don't even try it - but because he's so ... immature. he's nineteen; so was rose, and it's absolutely night and day between them. i genuinely cannot find much of worth in his characterisation when 99% of the time he just asks plot questions, and the rest of the time he's pretty ineffectual in spite of apparently being very bright - studying mechanical engineering and the like. i've been thinking on this for awhile and i'll have to keep letting it run in the back of my brain, bc i genuinely cannot figure a way round it.

#SORRY TO ANY RYAN ENJOYERS I JUST. HE REALLY IRRITATES ME #CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW THIS MAN IS 31 YEARS OF AGE AND HES SUPPOSED TO BE 19 LIKE #just realised this means yaz is supposed to be 19 too literally WHAT.#* meta.

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clay-cuttlefish · 2 years ago

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Assorted short runs.

The Question: The Deaths of Vic Sage

I have complicated feelings about this.

It engages very well with Vic's violent single-mindedness and his tendency to act like he's the only person capable of fixing things. There's a lot of thought put into using aspects of his Ditko characterization and how it changes his dynamic with Tot and Myra. It Gets Him.

Even the little details are drawing from his history, like his mediocre google skills.

Unfortunately the actual story isn't great. It wants to be about the role the media plays in perpetuating racism, and Vic's struggles with accepting things he doesn't understand, and the nature of evil, and... It's too cluttered to give any one aspect enough focus.

Like, both the cowboy story and the PI story are thematically interesting, but it's not long enough for those detours to fully develop.

I think it's worth reading, it's got fantastic art and a lot of care put into it, but only for people who are already big Question fans and will appreciate it as a riff on Ditko and O'Neil's work rather than as a standalone thing.

Harley Quinn and the Birds of Prey

Effectively a Birds of Prey movie tie-in. It's somewhat connected to canon, but also it's Black Label, using movie-ish characterization, and doesn't fit cleanly anywhere in the timeline.

I am a known Harley Quinn hater so I cannot be objective about whether this Renee characterization actually completely sucks or if I just hate this book. Pretty sure it's some of both.

Birds of Prey (2020)

Another comic drawing from the BoP movie. Renee's more of an actual character but I do not like it for her or for anyone else.

Starting to suspect I will not enjoy the Birds of Prey movie. I'll cross that bridge when I come to it... which will have to be soon, since I'm pretty close to finishing up every single comic.

#clayposts #clayreads #the question #vic sage

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sniktx3 · 1 month ago

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How open are they about their "Queer Identity"?

from here. ( accepting )

i’m so glad you chose this one to ask!! its a very complicated question, so prepare for some rambling below the cut. my apologies that i cant format my headcanon-y answers in an easier way, i just need to infodump.

i think, truthfully, the answer is it just depends. it depends on who logan is talking to, where he is, who he’s with, his mood, his current mental state, if he’s actually together with any of his on and off partners, etc.

his stance is very much a “well you didnt ask, so i aint gonna tell you.” type of thing, which was how he felt about telling the xmen his NAME, so yk. hes not usually gonna outright say he’s into men or declare himself, gay, queer, bisexual, etc unless directly asked (and well, if he doesnt truly like you, then that answer will probably also be vague as hell) or if it’s to prove a point in the snarkiest way he can.

but in most cases he’s fine with mention or two of his relationships with men, if it fits the conversation. he isnt afraid to comment on a mans appearance or flirt, either— he usually has about the same stance regarding that as he does with women.

all of that being said, logan has gotten extremely defensive about it, and probably will again! its not so much out of shame, but knowing the danger, though when his memories were messier and earlier in his life there was a lot more shame to it. when someone jokes about his queerness, esp someone a lot younger or someone he doesnt like, logan tends to default to snapping at them about it. he doesnt appreciate jokes about it unless its from someone he’s considered a close friend or family for years, or from one of his actual long-time on and off partners. there are specific moments where other queers that he’s having a fling with or a one-night-stand with make jokes, and sometimes he’s chill with that as well. but if its someone he actively dislikes, or someone he finds annoying (even if theyve hooked up) (cough cough deadpool), logan is gonna get pissed! (ofc i’d like to preface that those jokes all depend on context. he doesnt usually gaf if randos really make jokes, at least if theyre also queers or not making harmful jokes. its different when its someone he does know, especially if he doesnt like them, or if its a stranger or a famous person, even, purposely being a dick and being harmful in their phrasing)

hes also… well. he comes from a different era. as adaptable as logan is, he finds the way younger generations make “homophobic jokes” or whatever to be uncomfortable as hell. its one thing when youre at a gay club and youre clearly gay as hell. its another, negative, thing to make them at someone on the street, even if youre queer. etc etc etc.

his transness is a whole other thing— he’s much less open about it, and wont make jokes or references to it ever outside of people he’s close with. if a hook up or short fling tries to say more about it, especially after they’ve ended their relations, logan cannot be held responsible for punching them in the face (/silly) even if what they say isnt necessarily negative. again, its not really shame— its just safety. the reason (my) logan started to identify as a man was because it was safer and gave him more prospects to pose “as a man” in the 1800s, when he was on the streets. he ended up sticking with it because it felt correct. im sure there were times when people found out, back in those days and up til the 1900s, that he “wasnt actually a man” and it never went well. its protection over anything. around the xmen or friends or family or long time lovers, ofc he doesnt give a shit. and even when in the public eye, its easy enough to declare his chest to just be fat and muscle, even if it may raise an eyebrow or two. but full declaration of and acknowledgement in the public eye or by people he doesnt like, isnt something logans ok with and probably wont be. its bad enough that anyone related to weapon x and subsequent parties, SHIELD, department h, and alpha flight know!

i guess to sum it up: logan is out as queer, even if not everyone has picked up on it. hes not hiding being bisexual, he just doesnt discuss it a ton with random people, outside of like gay bars (which he goes to, and yall knoe it). hes not out as trans, but plenty of people know, regardless. hes much less likely to talk about being trans.

#ooc: respond.#character studying.#this is so messy and horribly phrased im sorry 😔

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ourceliumnetwork · 1 year ago

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as usual, interactions with my family (benign and in fact only the bare minimum of an interaction) have caused me to have Complex Feelings.

my grandpa's got cancer. this isn't news, it's just a fact and has been a fact since 2016. Pancreatic cancer that has metastasized outside of his pancreas (specifically in his lungs - it's damn lucky it's slow growing and he's a contrarian by nature). He is no longer doing chemotherapy about it, but he's part of a very small percentage of people who survive more than 6 years with it. so. You know. there's that.

He's doing well, all things considered. Again, it's slow growing cancer, he's somehow lucked out with it. I'll know we're close to the end when he stops wanting to get out in his boat and go fishing. Or stops working on the boat in general. I'm very fortunate to have known all of my grandparents for my whole life so far - even if some of them ended up being major bigots apparently. oh well, when you've got 6 you're allowed a couple duds.

My grandpa and grandma are trying very hard to love me. They've adjusted to the name once i mentioned "hey, literally no one i am still talking to calls me my old name anymore, i know i said it was okay to use in the transition stage but i honestly forget to answer to it, would you mind?" and then they immediately went for the change. they still struggle with my pronouns but like. grandpa's got cancer, i'm not going to fuss at him for using she or her for me (especially during a season where like. i am more girl right now, whether i like it or not lol. it's...complicated). I'll correct grandma later down the line if I gotta but like.

they both just assume i'm one of those Strange Lesbians and like, i'm not not one of those, it's just not what i told them when i came out. so like. it's complicated.

I... cannot get over how much they were emphasizing how happy i sound now. Grandma even mentioned it in her note in the card i got sent for my birthday. I mean it's true, i am very happy up here. I'm happier than i ever have been, in fact. I have never been this well off mentally before.

it sucks a little that they like. didn't understand how very deeply unhappy i was before now. that they have to hear it now, how very different i am when i am excited and enthusiastic and looking forward to an actual future for once.

it sucks a lot that i don't feel comfortable sharing more with them, that i don't feel like i can reach out and request comfort or assurance from them. It sucks a lot that they're not the only ones that I feel like this about in my biofamily.

I didn't know I didn't trust any of them until i found people I do trust. until i found people i know i can rely on when things are bad even if only to be in the bad with me so i'm not alone.

the birthday call and card were both somewhat of a response to my update email - one so that grandma could double check to make sure the address would receive mail so i would get my card, and two so that we could catch up a little.

We didn't discuss my health issues at all. the questions i had about our family's medical history, I didn't get any of that information from them. I could have asked. Should have. Forgot. Could probably call them back and bring it up but...

well. Grandpa's got cancer. I don't want him worrying about my heart. or my bones. or my pain. he doesn't know me that well, after all. it would be an unnecessary burden to him. Especially since all of that information was in my email, and they never actually confirmed they got it, outside of me reminding them that the address was in the email - and then the card got to me.

so they got the email. they have it. they have chosen not to respond with any useful information. Just like my aunt on that side. just like my sister.

just like my mom would have, if i'd sent it to her.

at least i know she comes by it honest.

like. bright sides: money for my birthday hell yeah that's a lot of money to buy weed with (i will likely end up using it for bills mainly, but. still). grandpa's still doing okay (desperate to get back out on the water with his fishin pole) and like. i think we're all in a place mentally where we're just. accepting of the inevitable. which like, not fun, but of the pre-grief options, i'll take it. Grandma sounds like she's doing alright and it's getting warm out so she's going to be able to garden which will help her feel even better probably. i don't have to cut off yet another section of my biofamily at this point, which is always a nice thing to not have to do (i won't lie...they are on thin ice, i'm just... delaying things because, well. grandpa's got cancer. wouldn't you?)

i...am allowed to not deal with people who stress me out and make me anxious, even if their genetics did contribute to my existence (and especially if they didn't) but... well. grandpa's got cancer. and he's always been a bit of a dick. he's actually mellowed out a lot, and well. they stress me out but it's... very different from my mom (their daughter). so. they get to be on the same boat as my aunt (their other daughter) and my sister. i won't do it yet, but. well. i might do in the future. it depends on them.

i hope i don't gotta carve out more of my biofamily in order to have peace. i'd like to keep some blood connection to that side of the family in my circle. i just might need to cast a wider net and involve people i really don't know all that well into it. no time like the present to start building new relationshps with folks, right?

anyway i'll go back to trying hard not to focus on the background planning for what i'm going to have to be ready for when funerals start happening.

#heads up i talk about my grandpa's cancer dx from 8 years ago and the way my brain has been dealing with that for that same time period #i'm cool about it but like i know it's a sensative thing for others so just be aware #also as usual a cw for my family being mentioned in general #i'm glad they know i'm happy now and they know what that sounds like #and that they're glad i am happy #are the important things i guess

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madraleen · 2 years ago

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Attack on Titan manga Post-Time Skip Overall Thoughts, Part 1: Only Ymir Knows.

I decided to do an overall-thoughts first and then post the commentaries. It kind of turned into an essay, so I split it in two parts. None of it is mean, but it is critical. To be clear: I love Attack on Titan; just thinking about it gets me emotional. This is why I’m writing this- to make peace with my gripes, get it out of my system and watch the anime in peace. These are fairly initial thoughts. It’s been less than a week since I’ve finished the manga (and lost my mind in the process, lol), and it’s such a rich and complex narrative that I’m sure I’ll change my views here and there. Proceed at your own discretion.

To begin with: Few works of fiction have made me so engaged and have made me feel things so strongly and viscerally like Attack on Titan- both parts of it, regardless of my gripes. I consider everything pre-time skip a masterclass in writing. I consider a lot of things post-time skip absolutely great, a lot of them decent, and some of them sloppy.

The ideas presented range from good to great, but the execution of some of those ideas is poor. I don’t think the ending is awful. It’s decent. But decent compared to the brilliance of Part 1 and some of Part 2 is a little insulting for such a body of work; I know it could have been done better; we all do.

I will not touch on Eren in this part. He gets a Part 2 all on his own, because Eren’s handling is my major issue in Part 2. Here are the miscellanea.

My boy Armin: His mind was criminally underutilized. All his strategic genius went out the window. He upped his compassion and pacifistic nature, but the brilliant thinker of Part 1 just wasn’t there. He also never got closure in his story. He never felt like he lived up to Erwin, he tells himself he hates himself, and none of that gets resolved. He never gets a conclusion with Annie either.

Mikasa the world-trotter: How did she get back to Paradis with Eren’s head? How did she manage to establish a life on the very island she betrayed?

Mikasa and Armin, our lords and saviors: It should have made sense, but it felt unearned. Mikasa and Armin were far from central to the story in Part 2. They were part of the ensemble, and suddenly the fate of humanity comes down to Mikasa’s choice and how it relates to Ymir’s love, and Armin’s supposed to save everyone? Great concepts, unbelievably rushed and sloppy execution. These things needed foreshadowing and time to breathe.

My one and only Levi: It’s such a shame that we never got to see flashbacks in his own POV, especially how he got to join the Corps and how he came to be so close to Erwin.

Our Queen Historia: I cannot understand how she became so irrelevant after becoming the Queen.

The ammo conundrum: Unlimited thunder spears and gas. Their running out has been such a prominent, limiting thing in the series, yet it never was an issue when they were fighting on Eren. I’m half-convinced that they just didn’t fly around much, so I’m not sure if this is actually an issue.

No one seems to care about the Hallucigenia creature. No one questions it, questions if it's dead, questions what it is or where it came from. It’s the one thing that causes everything, it’s legendary, IT’S RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF YOUR EYES, and yet.

The time paradox: I don’t like wibbly wobbly timey wimey narratives. I don’t like it when characters from the future affect characters from the past and create a time paradox where the past was never different and the outcome was always the same because time exists all at once. I can’t wrap my mind around there not being a starting point. This is 100% a personal preference and I do not hold it against the manga.

All in all I just think it became too complicated for its own good. Too many POVs to do them all justice, too many threads to give them all a payoff, and… well, not enough Eren. Which leads us to Part 2~

#attack on titan #attack on titan manga #attack on titan spoilers #i legit lost my mind and this is how i cope #manga #manga commentary

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trashcanwithsprinkles · 2 years ago

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Okay, this is a long one! please stick with me;-; I've been bringing a lot of time-travel, dimension-travel, transmigration, and reincarnation shit for around 3 or 4 years now, and I just wanna ask;

What's going to happen when the Teyvat timeline reaches the future timeline? Ajax isn't born until the future timeline, so what happens when they reach the point where Ajax is born? I'm not sure and I'm lazy to re-read, but if Ajax doesn't have a constellation yet, then would he gain his constellation when his "other self" is born? Would it be the same one? If he does have one, will his younger counterpart share the same constellation? Can two separate beings exist under one constellation? also, if we are going with the, "the universe split the moment time was rewinded and therefore are no longer the same universe" idea, what happens to the future Ajax?

The Ajax that we know had to get snapped multiple times in his life just so he could glow like a fucking light stick. What would the consequences be if Ajax no longer grows up to be that person? Would our Ajax be joining the unknown God in the afterlife? Or perhaps, would this new Ajax be a reincarnation? I have so SO MANY MORE QUESTIONSIOHDIJFD ples answer-⊂(・﹏・⊂)

i have to admit that i am not entirely sure where your line of questioning comes from;;

for one, i'm going to assume you've caught up with the fic as of chapter 58. ajax had no constellation prior to godhood because his world was outside of the world tree's purview. he obtained the one he has bc of connecting with irminsul via godly ascencion.

i hope this isn't coming off as mean, i know this is a jumbled premise and, since it's a fic primarily about ajax being op, most of the timeline technicallities are very hand-wavey. so like- they're not the focus of the story, whether they abide by conventional theories on how timeline splitting would actually work.

i'm putting the rest under the cut to spare everyone's dash but tl;dr:

the fic is operating under two timelines since the very beginning. the first is the og teyvat, where rex lapis and shogun are, and where skirk comes from. ajax' world is technically from there, even if set on a different... well, world. and the second is our current teyvat, pre-archon war, where skirochka and morax and guizhong are from. current teyvat and og teyvat were originally one and the same, but with ajax' arrival and subsequent fuckery with the events that would've played out had he just sat still and done nothing, he created a different branch of the timeline, and the one he's currently in. so when he travels to his world, he's actually traveling to the future of the original timeline.

so since timelines cannot converge, the teyvat ajax is on at the moment will never 'reach' the original one. the original one still happened, he didn't exactly 'change history' as basileios said, not in the conventional way. he did change what celestia had predicted 'history' would be – he changed the future. he didn't change the past, he just made a new timeline where things wouldn't be fucked. technically this would mean there's a different timeline where ajax doesn't manage to reform celestia and things sitll go to hell? but since that's so much of a headache and genshin has plenty of time-defying things, i'm just working with the generous assumption that abyssal-tainted ajax doesn't abide by the exact same time laws as everyone else. so like- the original timeline was never touched. ajax split the timeline literally on arrival, since it was never supposed to happen, because otherwise there would've been a closed loop of ajax having existed in the past that his world fled from? and thus wouldn't have needed to flee bc ajax would've already fixed everything? or, worse, ajax would've been doomed to fail from the start?

time jumping is far too complicated for my brain, so you can see why i'm using the abyss to get around it.

so, with the future changed, nothing is going to play out exactly the same it did in the original timeline. they're never going to 'catch up' to it, because they're not going there. since ajax' birth was so far down the line, we can assume that an ajax from the new timeline will simply never be born bc of the butterfly effect of things not playing out exactly the same in morepesok. nothing will happen to our ajax, either, since his story is already set in the original timeline, which isn't being touched here.

this probably makes no sense if you know a lot about how time would work in a multiple-timeline scenario, but, again, since that was never the point of the fic, i'm just using the abyss as the unknown variable that it is to basically use it as an excuse for why things may not add up.

and in the impossible scenario where an ajax would be born in the new timeline, his constellation wouldn't be the same, because they, again, wouldn't be the same person. the only beings that currently share a constellation are skirk and skirochka, but they're a giant exception. moreover, they don't even, strictly speaking, share papaver dei. around chapters 26 to 29 basileios mentions that the stars are shifting because someone is changing history. technically, while the names remain the same for simplicity's sake, none of the characters of the current timeline have the same constellations as their counterparts in the original one anymore. like- morax' lapis dei isn't the same lapis dei of rex lapis, because rex lapis' included the archon war, while morax' no longer does. guizhong's in the original timeline literally included her death, which isn't there anymore. so papaver dei is 'complete' for skirk, but is now different for skirochka as she is still young and things didn't play out as they did for the other one. moreover, skirk hasn't connected to irminsul after getting to the current timeline, so as far as the tree cares, skirk doesn't really 'have' a constellation. she's probably going to anchor to the abyss, anyway. they don't even share a constellation under irminsul's eyes, so.

anyway, uh... i'm looking at what other questions you made,,,

a reincarnation would require ajax to die? so like. no. you could say taht, once ajax eventually does die, that at some point in the much later future, there is a reincarnation? but going by your question, no, that wouldn't be the 'same' ajax that was supposed to be born had he not changed history. you have to think of the current teyvat as a mostly blank slate. some things will still happen, but most will not. and the ones that will happen, will only do so because they're immediate and thus not nearly as fucked over by the butterfly effect.

most of your other questions are under the assumption that current teyvat will somehow catch up with or affect the original at all, so- i'm afraid those would all be no,,,

time was never rewinded. ajax was plucked off his world and thrown to the past, where he immediately created a split by virtue of existing. so like-

refer to the diagram i put before the cut;;;;;;;

i hope that makes sense?? again, sorry if it came across as mean, that wasn't the intention hahah:;;

#thank you <3

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viatagrinner · 3 years ago

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Clavis Lelouch. Propose to you.

Chapter 2.

Part 2/1

In Rhodolite there is a tradition of throwing the bouquet. If someone catches it, they become the next bride.

(That's... but...)

Mr. Clavis' declaration of marriage shocked not only me, but everyone present as well.

Attendee 1: Mr. Clavis and... MC, you're getting married...

Attendee 2: ...Сan we celebrate? That's...

Attendee 3: Of course we should celebrate! MС doesn't seem to be too happy about it...

Clavis: I know, I know. So, we have to get ready tomorrow, right?

MC: And Mr. Clavis, you're also... You're joking, right?

Clavis: Oh my God, do you really think I'm joking?

(I can't believe that I got married just because a bouquet happened to fly to me...)

(No. Even Mr. Clavis, who is a very unpredictable person, would never do such a thing...)

Clavis: Come on, sweetheart. Which jewelry do you like?

Clavis: Oh, and by the way, we should have matching rings. You and me, we'll incorporate the same jewels.

Сlavis:...But it's not bad to have my color on your ring and your color on my ring.

Clavis: Hmm, I'm troubled. What do you think?

(N-no, no, no, no, noooo!)

The day after the wedding, Mr. Clavis picked me up from my room and took me into the living room, where I found a lot of jewelry brought in by the jewelry dealer.

Clavis: I see, you're too happy for words. My lover is shy, so it can't be helped, haha!

Part 2/2

Mr. Clavis, who seems to be in a better mood than usual, selects a few gems and lays them out in front of me.

MC: Oh, these colored gems are so pretty, just like Mr. Clavis!

MC: No! .... Are you serious about the ring?

Clavis: Definitely. Actually, it's hard to dismiss the fact that I had it as a surprise to propose.

Clavis: You want to choose what you're going to wear every day, don't you?

Clavis: By the way, we have a tailor coming this afternoon.

MC: Isn't that a bit hasty!

(I never thought I'd be ready for marriage so soon, from the day after I received the bouquet!)

Mr. Clavis has always been unpredictable, but this time he outdid himself.

Clavis: What? You don't approve?

MC: I would say that I disapprove... I don't think that marriage is something that is so easy to do.

Clavis: Well, so when are you going to marry me?

(When...)

I think I asked myself a similar question the other day.

I love Mr. Clavis and I want to be with him forever, but...

When the word "marriage" is mentioned, the mind stops and cannot move forward.

Part 2/3

Clavis: I love you, and you love me. What's wrong with that?

Mr. Clavis wrapped his arms around me and brought his golden eyes, filled with sensuality, close to mine...

When he kisses the tip of my nose, there is an unmistakable feeling of tenderness in my chest.

(Yes, my heart has no problem with that. I, on the other hand, don't know what to do.)

(But at least I understand that I shouldn't get married with that impulse/so rushed).

MC: Mr. Clavis. Can I go for a little walk?

Clavis: A walk? I'll take one.

MC: No... I'll be right back!

(Better step back and think, lest I be carried away by Mr. Clavis's impulse.)

What do I want to do, what am I worried about?

At that moment, to face my heart, I run out of the living room, as if fleeing.

...However

MC:.....

Clavis:......

MC:...Mr. Clavis.

Clavis: What?

MC: Why are you following me?

I stopped in the garden, surrounded by the scent of roses, and when I turned around, Mr. Clavis stopped in front of me with a smile on his face, not looking offended.

(I'm sure Mr. Clavis is aware of my desire to be alone.)

Clavis: No, it would be unmanly of me to leave you alone when you are in distress.

Clavis: A gentleman is a gentleman when he solves the problems of the woman he loves with her.

Part 2/4

(Perhaps Mr. Clavis knew from the beginning that I had something in mind.)

I think he might have picked up on my feelings at the word "engagement" that night of our affair.

MC: I'm going to...

I inhale the fragrance of roses deep into my lungs and think.

I think about the complicated emotions that are entangled in my mind, and I try to unravel them one by one.

MC: Mr. Clavis is .... His Majesty the King.

Clavis: Oh?... That's right.

MC: Even though this is a country with a lighter shade of the caste system that Mr. Clavis founded...

MC: Royalty is a very special thing, no doubt about it!

I'm surprised the words are coming out of my mouth before I think about it.

MC: I am the lover of such an amazing person!

MC: So... Maybe I'm insecure/ May be uneasy.

Clavis: What is anxiety?

(What, I .... I just couldn't put it into words, but I already had the answer.)

(The root of unidentified emotions....)

I felt a nudge from Mr. Сlavis, who was waiting with a kind face for my words.

MC: I'm not sure I can support you right now.

Part 2/5

MC: Being the King's Lady, there must be a lot of demands on you.

MC: I'm also reading liberal arts books behind your back.

MC: Sometimes I accompany Mr. Clavis to his social gatherings, but it's not enough

MC: I also have the will to protect this country with Mr. Clavis...

MC: I want to be strong enough to stand next to you and support you, Mr. Clavis.

Clavis: ....

MC: I thought that only then will I be able to become Mr. Clavis's bride.

MC: So, now . Maybe we'are getting impatient, with marriage.

After unraveling the complicated emotional threads, what I saw was a pure conclusion.

MC: Given Mr Clavis's position, I feel I shouldn't get ahead of myself just because I like him.

MC: Because I think it's something we need to take seriously and face up to.

(This is important... I want to wait until I am a woman suitable for Mr. Clavis).

(Just wondering what you think, Mr. Сlavis.)

(... I'm thinking too hard, I'll get laughed at.)

I have never had this kind of formal conversation with Mr. Clavis.

Mr. Clavis looked as if he had been caught flat-footed, but then he burst out laughing.

Clavis: I see. ...I didn't think so.

MC:... Why are you smiling?

(He looks kind of very cute).

Clavis: It would be natural.

Without laughing at my thoughts or denying them, Mr. Clavis hugged my waist and...

Clavis: It's like you just said you love Mr. Clavis so much you can't help it.

(Huh...)

He lightly stroked my cheek with his finger and gave me a loving look.

Clavis: You could have chosen to be loved, but you always try to be my accomplice.

Сlavis: I take that for granted.

Clavis: What man wouldn't love to be taken seriously like this?

(....Mr. Clavis)

The fact that Mr. Clavis accepted me, and that he was pleased with my choice, was enough to make my heart, which had only been anxious a moment ago, turn into a joyful color.

Сlavis: Then, I think you are mistaken about something...

#ikemen prince #ikemen ouji #ikepri #ikemen clavis #ikepri clavis #ikemen prince clavis #clavis lelouch #ikepri translation

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ichigomis · 4 years ago

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greetings dearest i love your writings very much, they help me sleep well at night and comfort me through tough school work, i was wondering if you could do some hcs of how the twins, kuroo and sakusa would be as an older brother, you can add or remove some chars if you'd like. Thank you very much and hoping to read more of your awesome works in the future❤

HAIKYUU BOYS AS YOUR OLDER BROTHER

with: miya twins, kuroo, sakusa, suna

notes: nonnie!!! i'm so happy that these could be of comfort for you and i was just smiling like crazy while reading your ask ;-; sending you lotsa lotsa hugs and kisses!

part one - part two

❊ MIYA TWINS

THE UTTER CHAOS PLEASE

there's never a quiet day at home smhhh

when they're fighting they try their hardest to get you on their side. osamu would bribe you with food while atsumu would just barge into your room and whine about osamu

one of them would probably sleep in your room when they really can't stand each other

atsumu wILL EAT YOUR FOOD and deny ever doing so (it's literally canon owhgruohgreiug)

will also take your things and lose them

you'd come down to the kitchen at 3 in the morning and find osamu there, making a whole meal. he'd just nod at you and make you food too (the best)

osamu → will listen to your rants and give pretty good advice

atsumu → will rant to you and asks for you advice

atsumu coddles you a lot and treats you like you're still a baby which earns him disapproving remarks from both osamu and your parents

your friends are in love with them, i mean the whole school is so

their teammates love you like omg a normal miya they are here for it

will fight whoever fights you, end of discussion, no questions asked

❊ KUROO

goes into your room, stares at you without saying a word, then leaves

and he NEVER cLOSES THE DOOR 😩

says he'll help you with your homework if you bribe him a little (but trust me, he'll help you no matter what nejkgrnregre)

lets you borrow steal his clothes

but you have to do his laundry 🙄

will barge into your classroom to ask for something (or just to bother you) and is not afraid to embarrass you

when you stay up all night playing with kenma he will lecture you (the both of you tbh) so bad

snITCH SNITCH SNITCH

when you're arguing he starts using complicated scientific terms so you can't respond

"cannot believe for the life of me that we have the same deoxyribonucleic acid running in our veins-"

you had to look up what deoxyribonucleic acid meant (and lost ur sht when you found out it's just DNA) you hate him for that

actually gives really good and smart advice

and is really responsible like if your parents are out he makes sure you've eaten and done all your schoolwork

is still annoying tho LMAOOO

❊ SAKUSA

you two can communicate with just your eyes, he can get you out of a situation with you just giving him a look

like if you want to leave the house but can't find an excuse he'll have one for your parents :o

reprimands you for having a messy room but the moment you go out he comes in and cleans it for you 🤧

never snitches unless ur doing something bad HAHAHAHA

buys you sanitizers when he buys for himself, mainly because you keep losing yours

doesn't talk as much as the others but he's always there. watching tv with you in the living room, scavenging for leftovers with you in the kitchen, and cleaning the house with you

GIVES YOU ALLOWANCE MONEY 🥳🥳🥳

(for fem! readers) buys your sanitary pads and other necessities, you don't need to ask bc it's part of his daily grocery list

lets you rant to him though you're not sure if he's listening (he is) and actually remembers everything you say

will GLARE at the people you talked about in your rants and they'd be so confused

never answers his phone when you call and replies only after an hour

you also consider komori as your older brother because that's just the law

❊ SUNA

you gossip with him about EVERYTHING

people-watching is the two of you's favorite past time, it's just how it is

always brings home food when he goes out for some reason

knows all your secrets though you don't know how ???

though he never snitches but will blackmail you if he needs to 💀💀💀

takes candid and unflattering photos of you and makes them into memes 😀

uses those memes on a daily basis even outside your family gc...

will do the pranks he sees on the internet on you,,

when you're taking a nap, he wakes you up by banging on the door or something and pretends like there's an emergency (you get a mini heart attack almost every time smh)

pretends to be asleep when you try to wake him up and it's so annoying

never replies using words or sentences when you text him, uses memes instead

when you're feeling down, he takes you out shopping or to get something to eat

will binge watch any show with you, the shttier the better

has your back no matter what, he's got you for life, don't worry

p.s.: this was so fun to make iingwughirrgwrdg

» m. list

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ishibishie · 3 years ago

Text

after a long absence, it's the return of a.......

40+(?!) RANDOM HEADCANONS ABOUT STEVEN POST!

literally. i ended up writing over 40 more of these. help

- in a stark contrast to his charming person, steven can and will swear when he's certain strangers aren't around. it's not uncommon for steven to come home after a long day of work and bat off a tirade of profanities!

- if he ends up waking up before the sun rises, a thing he often does is head to the sandy beaches of mossdeep city, wade in the shallow waters, and watch the sunrise.

- steven often receives random clothing gifts from wallace, as spur of the moment "i saw this in a store and thought you'd like it" deals. the article of clothing from wallace he wears most is a "GALAR IS MY CITY" sweatshirt, first out of spite but soon unironically coming around to it.

- steven always makes sure to make wishes on any shooting stars he sees. his wishes always vary depending on circumstances: he's wished countless times for his mother to come back when he was a kid, but now wishes for more mundane things, such as a day off.

- due to his close ties with devon, a tech company, steven is a tad tech-savvy and understands a little more about technology than others. he's the guy on everyone's contact list that gets bombarded with absolutely stupid questions about how to turn the front camera of the rotom phone off.

- steven is often asked to be a guest on tv shows, whether morning news or late night shows, but always declines in fear that he'll end up saying something stupid that gets broadcast all over the world.

- he cannot take jokes well. if a personal jab is thrown his way, his only instinct is to pout and whine about said "falsifications of my character." luckily, he cools off very quickly once you remind him that the statement was made in jest, and may even laugh about it.

- steven is INCREDIBLY naive and will believe half of the things said to him if he's unfamiliar with the topic and doesn't have facts to possibly refute a claim. additionally, due to being asexual, conversations about sex fly by him and he'll straight up ask about raunchy things he's never heard of with a curious grin, much to the absolute horror of whoever's in earshot. please save this man from himself.

- he has a good singing voice! he doesn't really know any popular songs in hoenn or the rest of the world, so most of his singing is mindless ad-libbing. he harshly denies being good at singing, however.

- under his playful and kind-hearted personality, steven tends to bottle up a lot of his more negative and darker emotions, such as his complicated hatred for his father and jealously towards others who grew up privileged in a familial sense. on really bad days, he can be downright spiteful and a single comment/situation away from uncapping that bottle and going on an aggressive tirade. oftentimes, these moments are followed by a brief depressive episode, but it doesn't take too long for him to shake it off.

- he's a bit of a sore loser after hard-fought pokemon battles. not in a way that involves demeaning his opponent or putting their skill at question, but more of a "sitting quietly at home after the fact and wondering that maybe if he used THAT move instead or beating himself up for not seeing the opponent's strategy" kind of way.

- he actually hates mornings, but wakes up way earlier than anyone he knows out of habit. do not talk to him until he's had his tea.

- despite saying he has a tier list of his favorite stones, his answers change so frequently on what can be a day-by-day basis that nobody actually believes he has a tier list anymore.

- steven owns a few pride flags he got as gifts from wallace. however, due to his very limited roster of people he's actually come out to, they just sit in one of his closets with no real use just yet. but in his bedroom, there is a single mini asexual pride flag tucked in a flower vase along with some fake flora.

- he gets along very well with the other champions! his favorite moments with some of the other champions have been discussing mythology and night-sky constellations with cynthia, learning about johto's rich history with lance, and going on a "sweet tooth tour" of a bunch of cafes in lumiose city with diantha.

- steven is always polite to most everyone, but is disgustingly polite around women in particular. he claims he's simply being the gentleman he was raised to be, but secretly hopes that his kindness and somewhat playful personality will lead to a lady doting on him like a child: a kind of affection he deeply craves especially after his mother died.

- he's not a huge tv guy. the only things he'll ever watch are contest reruns, the daily news, and occasionally crime documentaries.

- whenever he visits galar, steven makes up an entire list of "errands" to run in at least five different settlements, only as an excuse to take the corviknight taxis again and again. one of his favorite things to do in galar!

- steven is both a touchy and non-touchy person. with strangers or folks he doesn't know too well, he tends to avoid any personal contact beyond a handshake. but with friends, he's often grabbing their hands, hugging them, and other friendly gestures.

- while steven does have accounts on popular social media sites, he literally never uses them. the only purpose of his accounts were to snipe usernames!

- he's a fairly competent artist! due to his habit of mindlessly doodling pokemon in his field notes over the years, he's gotten a basic understanding of how to illustrate subjects, both people and pokemon.

- something that always cheers steven up is scrolling through his device's photos and recalling the happy memories behind each photo. especially on days where he feels removed and disjointed from the rest of the world, seeing all his silly selfies with wallace never fails to remind him that he's not alone.

- between things such as his father's years-long expectations and ignorance of his true destiny, and his base of devoted 'til death fangirls, steven rarely wonders if he even truly knows himself or if the "himself" he knows is built upon the many words from others. more than a few sleepless nights have been spent on this question.

- when wearing a jacket that's not his iconic blazer, steven tends to lean towards oversized sweaters or windbreakers. and when ditching the jacket entirely, he'll occasionally trade in the belt for suspenders!

- his favorite season is winter, as hoenn tends to have pleasant temperatures in winter and other regions will get snow, a very nostalgic kind of weather for him. in contrast, his least favorite time of year is the dead heat of summer: he burns very quickly due to his pale galarian complexion.

- if asked what region he hails from, there's a good chance steven will respond that he's from galar rather than hoenn. he generally likes galar a bit more than hoenn, and has very fond memories of being raised abroad for a few years in galar as a child!

- under the influence, steven is a "what?" kind of drunk. he acts like he's paying attention and will nod his head a lot to confirm he believes he's paying attention to whatever you say, but in reality his mind has become aol dialup noise. he also tends to blurt whatever pops into his mind literally milliseconds after he thinks it, and his galarian accent becomes borderline another language with how thick it gets. and due to his small frame, he'll completely black out when he's had one drink too many.

- steven is a frequent visitor to the mossdeep space center! due to how often he visits, the staff have started letting him in for free and always tell him when they have a new exhibit up. one of his favorite memories of visiting the space center was the staff letting him press the button to launch a new rocket into space.

- on days off where he never leaves home, he'll rock the holy trinity of lazy sunday fashion: oversized sweater, sweatpants, and a blanket cape. he doesn't ever answer the door if he's dressed like this, even for friends.

- he one day wishes find the courage to "officially" come out to the world, but only as a way to shut down all the baseless rumors about his sexuality. he's more than content to give nasty side-eye glances to celebrity news reporters who shove microphones in his face and ask if he's gay in the meantime.

- steven has a bad habit of forgetting to take breaks when it comes to doing work. occasionally, he'll fall asleep at his desk doing league paperwork. and in contrast to his proper and well-kept appearance, he sometimes drools in his sleep.

- steven isn't too fond of nicknames. the only exception to this is wallace calling him "stevie," which was a nickname his mother used for him that his friend picked up. now, only wallace is allowed to use this name for him. there was a single time where cynthia picked up on this name and attempted to use it, which led steven to completely freaking out.

- steven's rock collection not in glass cases is VERY dusty. he wants to dust his collection and make them shine again, but is afraid that he'll end up knocking something over and ruining the specimen forever. infrequently, whenever he walks by his dusty collection, he'll try and blow off some dust in a vain attempt.

- he secretly likes to collect plushies! he has a full hoenn rangers collection and all of his pokemon team replicated in stuffed cotton form.

- one of steven's deepest secrets is that he actually attended a protest against the devon corporation at one point. he was wearing some hand-me-down clothing from wallace so he wouldn't be spotted, and was able to swing his accent to shout the things he'd never get the chance to say about his dad otherwise. steven tries not to think of what would happen if his father ever learned of this.

- from his many years caving and hiking around mountains, steven has incredible stamina. additionally, if he were to ever take his jacket and shirt off, he's got surprisingly toned muscles for someone with a thin frame!

- there is a very slim chance of seeing steven at a cheap johtonian take-out buffet at 10pm when he's working on league paperwork he's put off. not even the prim and proper champion of hoenn is above the allure of inexpensive ramen noodles.

- steven loves feline pokemon! unfortunately, most of the wild skitty he encounters don't seem interested in his company and flee from him. he doesn't entirely mind, though: his little aron tends to act like a typical cat.

- he tends to act a bit coldly towards those he doesn't know. sure, he'll smile, offer a playful answer or two, and generally be a polite gentleman, but he'll refuse to answer any personal questions. he'll simply stare at you with a "seriously?" face if so.

- steven is a restaurant waiter's saving grace. due to how much wealth his family has and his extremely vain attempts of getting rid of his money, he tends to grab a literal handful of cash as a tip!

- if you look very carefully at steven's face on some days, you can spot a bit of makeup! he only tends to doll himself up a bit when he's preparing for a situation that requires him to look his best, such as a meeting with other league personnel.

- on the two days of the year steven visits his mother's grave, he'll start talking as if she's still alive and right in front of him. he knows she's gone, but there's a small part of him that believes she can still hear him and is watching over him. he'll spend hours sitting in front of her grave and babbling away.

- wallace has gotten him into the act of taking selfies. he's not very good at this as half his selfies cut off over half of his face, but he has fun with it regardless.

- as a prank, steven once claimed to give out his phone number for voicemails so his fangirls could send him messages: this number he gave out was actually his father's office phone line. needless to say, steven and his father weren't on speaking terms for a while after that.

- when life gets too hectic, steven will pack up and go on an overnight camping trip in the forests of hoenn. being outside under the stars always relaxes him, and the peace and quiet is appreciated as well.

- ever since the paldea region became a thing on his radar, he's started planning an extravagant vacation plan and a massive checklist of every pokemon in the region, in hopes to see every pokemon terastalize. he's never coming back home. hoenn is doomed.

#not art #steven stone #headcanons #love this silly little rock man

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lovee-infected · 5 years ago

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Hello! Recently I've seen a lot of twst blogs arguing on how twst characters are mischaracterized, especially Malleus. So do you have any ideas on how he is mischaracterized? Also, is it okay to ask for your general opinion on questions like a short character analysis or how a healthy a relationship with each twdt guy might be? Hope it's okay to ask!

For your first question anon, it's a GREAT thing to ask and to be honest I've been waiting for a chance to talk about him! And for your second one, yes, of course! I just love writing character analyis and it's totally okay to ask for character/personality/relationship analysis here! I've got a lot to say about Malleus so this is going to a detailed analysis about his whole personality.

There are commonly two popular opinions on how Malleus is which divides the fandom into two groups:

Group A:

Those who consider him to be an absolutely soft, baby dragon who just wants to be invited and have a friend. They believe that Malleus needs more attention and can be quite affectionate at the time, he can also be sometimes idiotic toward simple stuff like working with a computer or trying to talk with others which makes him even more adorable. "Despite Malleus's harsh and emo appearance and terrifying powers, Malleus is just a small baby inside," is also a common belief of this group.

Group B:

Those who argue that group A is totally shading everything important about Malleus's personality and true self just because he looks cute and plays with a childish tamagotchi. These group also comes up with rather strong points about his personality such as his status as a crown prince, his naturally dark personality as not only a dark fae but also Maleficent's grandchild, his maturity and cold nature and also, the aspect of his hellish powers which can make him look like an absolute monster at the time.

I believe most of you are familiar with these points of view but the question is, which one of them is the real Malleus?

And the answer is: Neither of them; yet both of them do have a point.

The main problem is how the fandom portraits him as either an emotional tamagotchi baby or an absolutely cold and heartless mister of evil, while the true Malleus is far beyond than just being either good, or bad.

Now let's discuss some of the important facts and common mistakes about Malleus's personality:

(1) Malleus isn't a baby, but he isn't a monster either

This is supposedly the main idea here which will be continued to be discussed through the rest of this analysis. This is often how many end up mischaracterizing him because: the way the describe Malleus is either too dark or too childish. What we need here, is a balance. This is the grandson of one of the most important Disney villains that we are talking about, and don't forget that Maleficent herself was confirmed to consume the powers of Hell, as she was indeed the mistress of all evil. So this dragon boy here surely isn't one to underestimate, and he clearly has inherited that hellish power of her grandmother. It's obviously seen through the story as well, from the way he was presented in chapter 2 and beans day event to how terrified other students always are to even talk about him.

But the thing is, there are softer aspects of his personality as well which prove that Malleus isn't just designed to present an undefeatable force of evil, and this is exactly what makes his personality a lot more interesting.

(2) Malleus is actually hard to approach and talk to

Let's be honest, Malleus isn't as soft and easy to befriend as many fans consider him to be. He doesn't get too friendly or chill as he speaks, and even his close allies like Silver and Sebek fail to get close to him as much as they wish to. When we talk about his dark aura, we aren't just talking about his horns and fearsome magic, it's also because of his personality itself. His calm yet cold tone always remains still regardless of who he's talking to. No need to mention that he isn't an ordinary student either, he not only comes from a well-known family but is also the crown-prince of valley of thorns. Out of all twst characters Malleus is the only one who is directly connected to the great seven by being Maleficent's grandson. His family and people on the other hand are overly protective over him, to the point of not letting him to even have a fake proposal in the ghost marriage event which means that Malleus has also got each and every of his actions under watch.

(3) He's slowly getting used to isolating himself

In his ceremonial robes story, he's obviously upset that he never had a chance to wear his ceremonial robes because he never got invited, but when Lilia says he'd one day overcome his ill fate and gets to wear them as he always wanted to, he says that he's fine. Then again when Lilia tried to bring him to the singing test in chapter 5 he avoids showing up. In his voice lines he also said: "Are you as well scared of me?" which is clearly shouting that he's no longer surprised to see people being afraid of him, he's getting used to being feared and at some point, hated. That's probably one of the bitter sides of his personality which he's slowly giving up on trying to change it.

(4) Malleus has got a great confidence and isn't shy at all

There many fanfics in which Malleus is presented as a shy boy who's scared of confessing to his s/o or asking them out, while he's the total opposite in reality. Just like Maleficent herself, he speaks calmly and in a formal tone, is very respectful as he speaks, and isn't one to ever have problem while talking to others.

It's others who always avoid talking to him while Malleus himself isn't the least uncomfortable with presenting his ideas and asking others for help when he needs to.

He isn't ever shy over his lack of ability to work with machines or asking others for help for seemingly childish issues like having his tamagotchi fixed or finding a friend for the GaoGao dragon.

The only thing left is how Lilia described him as "Kind of shy" in chapter five, which is most likely because of another reason discussed in part (3)

(5) He doesn't eat ice cream and play with a tamagotchi for no reason

Malleus explained that everything is ran by magic back in the valley of thorns and no one really uses any machines there, that's how he's pretty new to both technology and complicated tools.

I believe that the tamagotchi part was given to him on purpose, because else than showing the fact that he's bad with tools, it's great contrast to the harsh picture that his power and personality gives him!

Admit it, it's a funny and somehow, adorable contrast to see one of the strongest magicians who can burn the room to ashes in just a matter pf second playing with a children's toy. And I believe that it was given to him on purpose. They meant to give him some soft and cute features as well instead of just presenting him as an evil fae. He is indeed evil and his powers are terrifying, and that's how watching him play with a tamagotchi is rather surprising to many. If you saw Ortho or Cheka playing with one it wouldn't have gone any further than a simple "Awww" or "How cute" because it's something you'd expect to see from a kid, but when you see Malleus of all people playing with it, you can't help but to fascinated and flustered over how cute this fae's habits can be.

Ice cream on the other hand doesn't really have to do with cuteness, it's something Yana Toboso discovered while doing her researches on fae mythology which discuses that Dark faes enjoy cold and sweet foods, especially cream. So it doesn't really have anything to do with him being either a soft or a cruel boy, it's just a normal part of his nature as a fae.

(6) He might be crazily old to humans, but he's still pretty young as a fae

This one has really been getting on my nerves, come on people! It's true that he's probably been living for decades and possibly, centuries but don't forget that it isn't that much compared to a normal fae! Even Sebek calls him 'Young master' which means that he's still a pretty young one, no need to mention that he hasn't yet became the king either so he's not much different from the rest of the students in NRC.

I've seen people saying: "No Malleus won't do that he's -too old-" and I've got to say: What?

Come on even someone like Lilia who's been living for over 5 centuries can act like a nasty 14 year old at the time, so for faes at least, age isn't a limitation.

Malleus on the other hand is still a teenage fae! He needs to discover new things and talk with more people, just like a normal human being does. So if he doesn't enjoy doing anything too silly or stupid, it's because of his 'personality', not because he's too old. Even when tells Lilia that he isn't a child anymore, it's like how an 18 year old says it to his father.

(7) Malleus won't take insult easily

He is polite and respectful in general, but when he's offended, he'd seriously respond to it. Remember that a single swipe of hand from him can set the whole room on fire.

Rook and Leona were probably one step away from being burnt and when Leona really got on Malleus's nerves by humiliating him, Malleus stopped respecting him as a prince of an ally kingdom and humiliated back.

He is calm but to a specific point, and you can make sure that he won't be any soft or forgiving if you offend him, and it'll probably end in no good if he gets mad. So better not think that Malleus is one to just keep it in and later cry in a room because he's sad baby when someone dares insult him.

(8) Angelina Jolie's Maleficent has nothing to do with his story!

Nope, Malleus never had a lover who cut off his wings and sent him to a hell of depression and loneliness, and no you cannot find those two wounds on his back regardless of how romantic it may seem.

I admit it, it's a lovely Au, but it's JUST AN AU! I can still see people saying stuff like "Ohh!! Will we discover if Malleus too had his wings cut off in chapter 7?" and the answer is NO. While Angelina Jolie's Maleficent is surely a great one on its own, it needs be understood that twst's source of main information and characters designs is nothing else than the original Disney villains.

Malleus cannot be associated with any Maleficents else than the version we saw in 1959's sleeping beauty and it's an important fact to look through.

(9) Malleus is NOT Maleficent!

While they are a lot more similar than you can imagine(in both power and personality), let's not forget that Malleus is NOT Maleficent! He's a total new character on his own, and is unique in his own way.

He is twisted from Maleficent which means that no matter how similar they are, Malleus is a new character with a new personality.

Saying that he isn't soft at all and the fandom will see his true face when he overblots ( It's supposed to mean that the real Malleus is an absolutely evil and destructive one, just like Maleficent) is nothing different from denying all of Yana's hard work on designing him and his personality!

Malleus himself said that his grandmother's skills were far greater than his and most importantly: Malleus still has chance to have a better fate than Maleficent did.

Once again: He's still young! He still has a chance to be saved from turning into a heartless and isolated creature like Maleficent. No matter how cold he is, he hasn't yet got to the point of hating the whole world and losing all of his emotions. And that's why it's totally wrong to deny all the good that he might still have inside by saying that he isn't soft at all. He isn't a baby, but he isn't a monster either. Not yet.

(10) Even Lilia agrees that Malleus is still learning and his personality is in development

Can't you see? Malleus isn't attending to this school for no reason. His magic is already top notch, and his knowledge goes far greater than anything they might teach in NRC.

If you take a look at the story, you'll see signs of Lilia indirectly giving us signs of why Malleus still needed to attend to this school. In Malleus's SR robes' story, Lilia told him that he still has a lot to learn and knowledge isn't everything. And what might he find in NRC which has nothing to do with knowledge? People.

Lilia is trying to hold him back from isolating himself like Maleficent did, and is indeed trying to help him make friends and learn to get along with people without thinking that it's useless because they'd fear him anyway.

Also, he clearly wants Malleus to learn and experience new things in NRC by taking part in activities. In Malleus's Halloween SR story Lilia, who was always the one to choose Diasomnia's Halloween costumes, asks Malleus to choose this year's costume instead of him. Lilia first says that he wants Malleus to do it but later tells him that he has other reasons as well, he was trying to put Malleus into trying something new therefore he can have something learn from the experiment! (What a cute papa he really is...)

This is another proof of him not having the cold and unapproachable picture some imagine him to have, he isn't against experiencing and trying new things.

(11) He's still looking for a true friend

Malleus needs a friend, that's a fact. During his chats he mentions how Maleficent always had her loyal pet crow by her side as the only reliable creature she could always trust, and how Malleus wonders if he can ever find such a worthy ally of his own.

Even as he has Lilia, Silver and Sebek by his side he doesn't feel like he has such a friend.

People have been avoiding him through his whole life, and you can see how excited he got when Cater asked him for a selfie as he was one of the very first people who ever tried to approach him.

While he's slowly getting used to being feared by everyone, he'd still appreciate a friend and he needs one. Not even Maleficent herself could've made it all on her own without a friend by her side.

(12) Malleus isn't heartless

While he won't easily fall for anything or anyone, it isn't impossible for him to love.

We haven't yet seen anything that directly gets us to the point of love in the story but it's something you can tell through his actions and words.

When he cares for something or someone, he'd be serious about it.

Two obvious examples would be his tamagotchi and the ramshackle dorm. He'd certainly get out of his way to find someone to fix his dear tamagotchi and as we saw in the Halloween event, he furiously stated that he'd burn anyone who tries to the ramshackle dorm any harm, because he likes that place.

There isn't much he holds dear in life, but when he does, he won't let a single soul to take it away from him.

When he can be this protective over something that just entertains him, just try to imagine how far he might go to protect the one he loves. He falls in love very slowly and it'll probably take him a while to realize it if he actually does. He can begin with small interests and repeated meetings but at some point, it'll turn into a routine, an obsession. He won't easily fall in love, but when he does, he won't be able to easily let go of it either.

(13) His relationship with MC is far more important than you're thinking

Just by going through his voice lines, you can tell how MC is effecting Malleus's personality and life. I'm not saying that it's love or anything but the thing is, MC is changing Malleus nonetheless.

Their relationship has been a totally new thing for Malleus to experience from the very beginning, because MC didn't know him. Malleus is obviously used to being well-known as the infamous prince of the Draconia family by almost everyone, but MC was an exception.

He asked MC to talk to him and tell him stories, it can be clearly see that he enjoys talking to them.

He also mentioned that MC has made him feeling lots of things he hadn't felt before, which can also be connected to part (10) where we discussed how he's still young and needs more of communication and friends because he needs to learn.

Some argue that Malleus couldn't care less about MC and the only reason he shows up around them is because of the ramshackle dorm, which can be easily proven wrong by two hints:

1) Malleus sent a Happy holiday card to MC after the winter holiday.

2)What Malleus told Lilia at the end of the Halloween event stories after all the troubles that was brought upon the ramshackle dorm: "I want that human to enjoy Halloween too"

While it isn't necessarily romance that we're talking about, his relationship with MC is clearly telling us that he's a lot more of emotions and humanity inside him than what we were expecting.

At this point, it's important to see that in spite of his cold nature and mature personality he is slowly beginning to feel more and more emotions as the result of meeting newer people in NRC, especially MC. Saying that he is nothing but a heartless fae who is wrongly thought to be a soft and emotional boy is nothing different from judging him the same way as most of the people in twisted wonderland itself judge Malleus, it's important to see that he's a lot more.

His personality itself is surely amazing and as a Malleus hoe stan myself I can't wait to get more of his background in chapter 7, although it's probably going to be dark as well. They really did give his design a twist and that's how he's a balance of and menacingly powerful magician and a young boy who's just learning to deal with emotions.

For now, that's all I had in mind! Hope that I didn't miss anything. This was a general character analysis which also discussed some of the common mistakes about Malleus's personality but-

In case that you're wondering how he's being mischaracterized in reader insert fics, that'll be a totally different issue to discuss which would also need another post to be discussed through.

Small note: Just saying that there's often a dark lore to twst x reader fics (Especially for Malleus/ Leona x reader) which is usually better to be ignored while reading/writing for them...

#twisted wonderland #twst #twst theories #twisted wonderland theories #Twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #malleus draconia #malleus draconia x reader #Character analysis #answered

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