#writing arguments

[ailelie]

A Ramble on Plotting an Argument

When I am plotting an argument, I want to know a few things:

What does each person think is true

What is actually true

What does each person think they want

What does each person really want

What are they willing to say

What lines can't be crossed

What is their history

These are important because they define the parameters of what characters will do and set-up the undercurrents.

I also have to think about how I want the argument to end:

Resolution; they come back together

Further apart

Closer but still not resolved

Swayed; one ends up agreeing with the other

Then I have to think about the shape and intensity of the argument. It shouldn't be just one volume.

One I wrote recently began with tension, escalated to yelling, dropped to pleading, followed by tension, resignation, and one shooting the other.

Another I wrote started with one character calling the other out and demanding answers, this led to evasion, then yelling, then hurt epiphany, a quiet restating of the issue with each side showing their hands, and almost resolution with both sides feeling heard and knowing how better to move forward together.

See how the volume rises and falls in each of those?

In the first, both characters are completely convinced of their positions and so it is a battle of futile persuasion and calls to their personal ties, as if their connection can overrule their disagreement.

In the second, it is a matter of miscommunication, long-held hurts, and projection.

Next, I think each argument has a turn or moment when at least one of the people involved realizes which outcome they're moving toward. And, at that turn, they have to decide how to maintain or shift their behavior.

[kindnessisstillhere]

Arguments

It's easy to argue,

A tone of voice, sharp word,

Jump to blame from a remark,

We can make an argument easily,

But writing them makes it hard.

Written arguments want strength,

They want a sustenance of views

And who forgot to feed the cat isn't news,

Then we fall on the controversies,

And lose the life that makes them real.

[you-can-write-this]

A Tip For Writing Arguments

In most arguments, Person A has a point they'd like to make, while Person B has an issue with Person A's style of communication/presentation.

(Warning: Like most people on this website, I'm politically progressive. My examples will follow my own progressive lens.)

Person A may want something from Person B. For example: Your roommate wants you to stop leaving clothes on the floor. If this escalates into an argument, Person B is unlikely to disagree with Person A's premise; more often, Person A is being "inconsiderate," or "picky" in Person B's eyes, and Person B will become aggravated by Person A's style of communication when they pause, when they don't listen, when their eyebrow twitches.

Person B may very well be in the right here; Person A could be manipulative, abusive, inconsiderate. Person A could be taking their problems out on someone else. But the premise itself-- that Person B is leaving clothes on the floor-- is rarely a point of contention (with exceptions; but these exceptions are unusual enough that they feel unrealistic on the page and downright uncompelling).

Jon Stewart famously humiliated one Republican state senator-- Nathan Dahm-- in a debate about gun violence. Jon Stewart doggedly pursues his very real concerns about policy. Nathan Dahm, however, later tweeted out that the editing of the clip was unfavorable to him, and he pointed out that Jon Stewart, for constantly interrupting him, is a "bully." Stewart's points were irrefutable, so Dahm's concerns fell to the ways the argument was presented, which most certainly involved steamrolling Dahm.

I don't give a rat's ass when Stewart steamrolls a senator to make an excellent point, but I'm a hypocrite (just like all of us), because I absolutely hate to see progressives steamrolled by the right. His name is a cliche, but we have to mention Trump, whose policy is as hated as his narcissistic behavior and constant interruptions. Maybe it's childish, but I definitely remember calling that guy a "bully," back when his debating techniques gave us some semblance of a shock.

By now, I should mention that there's nothing wrong with Person B.

Another way of looking at this is that Person A is driven mainly by "content," while Person B is driven mainly by "style" (of communication). What is said vs how it's said. We are all Person A, we are all Person B, and we can even switch places mid-argument.

Maybe Person A started it. Maybe Person B started it. Maybe both, maybe neither. Sometimes Person B is getting distracted, and this tendency can absolutely approach ad hominem. But Person B often has compelling disagreements with the content of Person A's words, sometimes veiled beneath a messier and less logical argument.

So! Now you know. Go write yourself some arguments! It's that easy!

[noodle-shenaniganery]

I hate how often some (typically abled) people will go “well, if you can’t [get a specific support], then what?” when it comes to disabilities. As if it’s a “gotcha” moment. And then act like you’re exaggerating when you answer that question honestly.

Disabled people often die from a lack of support. A lot of disability aids are not a luxury, but a basic need in order to live.

“Well what happens if—” people die. People hurt themselves. People hurt others. Disabled people don’t magically become abled if our needs aren’t met.

If a bedbound quadriplegic is caught in a housefire, and there’s nobody there to save them, they’ll probably die. They won’t magically become able-bodied out of sheer will.

If a nonspeaking/nonverbal autistic is denied access to alternative methods of communication, they’ll suffer in silence. They won’t spontaneously become capable of speech.

Disabled people are disabled all the time. Our disabilities don’t go away just because they’re inconvenient, or if we’re in danger.

[inkskinned]

i have chronic pain. i am neurodivergent. i understand - deeply - the allure of a "quick fix" like AI. i also just grew up in a different time. we have been warned about this.

15 entire years ago i heard about this. in my forensics class in high school, we watched a documentary about how AI-based "crime solving" software was inevitably biased against people of color.

my teacher stressed that AI is like a book: when someone writes it, some part of the author will remain within the result. the internet existed but not as loudly at that point - we didn't know that AI would be able to teach itself off already-biased Reddit threads. i googled it: yes, this bias is still happening. yes, it's just as bad if not worse.

i can't actually stop you. if you wanna use ChatGPT to slide through your classes, that's on you. it's your money and it's your time. you will spend none of it thinking, you will learn nothing, and, in college, you will piss away hundreds of thousands of dollars. you will stand at the podium having done nothing, accomplished nothing. a cold and bitter pyrrhic victory.

i'm not even sure students actually read the essays or summaries or emails they have ChatGPT pump out. i think it just flows over them and they use the first answer they get. my brother teaches engineering - he recently got fifty-three copies of almost-the-exact-same lab reports. no one had even changed the wording.

and yes: AI itself (as a concept and practice) isn't always evil. there's AI that can help detect cancer, for example. and yet: when i ask my students if they'd be okay with a doctor that learned from AI, many of them balk. it is one thing if they don't read their engineering textbook or if they don't write the critical-thinking essay. it's another when it starts to affect them. they know it's wrong for AI to broad-spectrum deny insurance claims, but they swear their use of AI is different.

there's a strange desire to sort of divorce real-world AI malpractice over "personal use". for example, is it moral to use AI to write your cover letters? cover letters are essentially only templates, and besides: AI is going to be reading your job app, so isn't it kind of fair?

i recently found out that people use AI as a romantic or sexual partner. it seems like teenagers particularly enjoy this connection, and this is one of those "sticky" moments as a teacher. honestly - you can roast me for this - but if it was an actually-safe AI, i think teenagers exploring their sexuality with a fake partner is amazing. it prevents them from making permanent mistakes, it can teach them about their bodies and their desires, and it can help their confidence. but the problem is that it's not safe. there isn't a well-educated, sensitive AI specifically to help teens explore their hormones. it's just internet-fed cycle. who knows what they're learning. who knows what misinformation they're getting.

the most common pushback i get involves therapy. none of us have access to the therapist of our dreams - it's expensive, elusive, and involves an annoying amount of insurance claims. someone once asked me: are you going to be mad when AI saves someone's life?

therapists are not just trained on the book, they're trained on patient management and helping you see things you don't see yourself. part of it will involve discomfort. i don't know that AI is ever going to be able to analyze the words you feed it and answer with a mind towards the "whole person" writing those words. but also - if it keeps/kept you alive, i'm not a purist. i've done terrible things to myself when i was at rock bottom. in an emergency, we kind of forgive the seatbelt for leaving bruises. it's just that chat shouldn't be your only form of self-care and recovery.

and i worry that the influence chat has is expanding. more and more i see people use chat for the smallest, most easily-navigated situations. and i can't like, make you worry about that in your own life. i often think about how easy it was for social media to take over all my time - how i can't have a tiktok because i spend hours on it. i don't want that to happen with chat. i want to enjoy thinking. i want to enjoy writing. i want to be here. i've already really been struggling to put the phone down. this feels like another way to get you to pick the phone up.

the other day, i was frustrated by a book i was reading. it's far in the series and is about a character i resent. i googled if i had to read it, or if it was one of those "in between" books that don't actually affect the plot (you know, one of those ".5" books). someone said something that really stuck with me - theoretically you're reading this series for enjoyment, so while you don't actually have to read it, one would assume you want to read it.

i am watching a generation of people learn they don't have to read the thing in their hand. and it is kind of a strange sort of doom that comes over me: i read because it's genuinely fun. i learn because even though it's hard, it feels good. i try because it makes me happy to try. and i'm watching a generation of people all lay down and say: but i don't want to try.

[novelbear]

"your love is like loneliness - angsty dialogue for a dying couple

a prompt list by @novelbear

"there's someone else, isn't there?"

"so what, that's it? you're just going to walk away?"

"whatever, do what you want."

"i can't believe i wasted five years of my life on you. on this."

"i don't need this."

"when was the last time we had a proper conversation?"

"everyone is noticing..."

"you always have something to say, don't you?"

"go! see if i care!"

"aren't you tired of fighting?"

"there's no helping this."

"don't you walk away from me!"

"you hang up and it's over."

"enough with the empty threats. you're bluffing."

"i hate the person you're turning me into."

"i never have these problems with anyone else." "then go talk to everyone else! why are you still here?"

"we're not happy. look at us."

"has it ever occurred to you that maybe we're just not meant for each other?"

"you wouldn't fight for us?" "what is there to fight for?"

"i don't understand why you always have a problem with me."

"oh go to hell."

"now you care?"

"no. i got it. i'll do it myself."

[superbat-lmao]

Jason travels to an alternate universe where Bruce only cares about being Batman. He took in each of his kids to serve the mission, not be his children.

Now, faced with alternate versions of his family, Jason has to grapple with the fact that his Bruce does care, that he is his father. Because the man in front of him now, trying to send him home, isn’t even close.

[creativepromptsforwriting]

ending an argument

"I don't care anymore."

"And now leave me alone."

"I hope you have a good life."

"Well, it is what it is."

"Nothing to be done anymore."

"It's time to get over this."

"We should stop trying to fix this."

"It's best if I go now."

"There is no winner in this."

"I can't do it anymore."

"Let's just stop this."

"I really wish the best for you."

"This is just not working."

"Well, goodbye then."

"I'm too tired to go on like this anymore."

"Maybe we should just end it here."

"I guess there is nothing more to say then."

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[elliottexists]

yes its fan service but have you considered that the fan they are actually servicing is david tennant

[unboundprompts]

Could we have some dark angsty prompts, mostly in the form of dialogue? :3

Dark Angsty Dialogue

-> feel free to edit as you see fit.

"You can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved." "Then I’ll drag you out of the darkness kicking and screaming if I have to."

"Every time you leave, it feels like you’re tearing pieces out of me." "Maybe if you felt the emptiness I do, you’d finally understand."

"I lied to protect you." "No, you lied because it was easier than telling me the truth."

"Do you even love me anymore?" "Does it matter? You’ll leave either way."

"You told me it would get better, but it hasn’t. It’s just gotten quieter." "Sometimes quiet is all we get."

"You never should’ve trusted me. I destroy everything I touch." "Maybe I’m okay with being destroyed if it means staying with you."

"Do you ever wonder what it’d feel like to just disappear?" "Every day. But then I think about who would miss me… and that’s the problem. It’s never you."

"If I had known what loving you would cost me, I wouldn’t have done it." "Liar. You’d do it all over again because it’s the only part of you that feels alive."

"I keep trying to hate you. It’d be so much easier if I did." "Don’t worry. I hate myself enough for both of us."

"Sometimes I think you hurt me just to see if I’ll still stay." "Do you blame me? You’re the only thing I’ve ever been afraid of losing."

"Tell me the truth. Do you regret it?" "Every single moment. And yet, I’d do it all again if it meant one more second with you."

"You make it sound so easy. Like walking away is just something you can do." "It is. You just take one step. And then another. Until you can’t feel me anymore."

[baejax-the-great]

The thing is... if you think the pursuit of glory is stupid and immature and kind of worthless, this should probably make Achilles a more compelling Greek hero to you because his entire character arc is coming to the same fucking conclusion.

At the Embassy, Achilles spells it out--he has come to realize he values his life more than he values glory, more than he values the riches Agamemnon has promised him. He had a few days to think about it, and it turns out dying in a war that has nothing to do with him for men who don't respect him just doesn't seem that great a deal to him anymore. He wants to go home. There is the complication that all the other Greeks will die without Achilles' participation in the war, and so it is Phoenix, his mentor, and Ajax, his friend, who convince him not to leave then and there. He decides to stay and see what happens.

When Patroclus dies, Achilles realizes there was something he valued more than his own life--his friend. Without him, his life has lost that value he only just found, so he might as well pursue revenge or the empty glory and riches he no longer cares about. That's his tragedy.

By the end of the Iliad, Achilles is very much of the opinion that glory and riches weren't worth it, and when we see him again in the Odyssey, he says he would have rather been a long-lived humble shepherd or something rather than briefly a king of men.

So I guess my point is if your beef with Achilles is that glory is stupid, well, he agrees with you. Congrats on having the greatest of the greeks on your side. I've heard he's great in a fight.

[mischievous-thunder]

Wade, during an argument: Now you sound like those boring unromantic people.

Logan, deadpanning: Says the one whose idea of flirting is to kidnap an unsuspecting drunk man at gunpoint from a bar.

Wade: YOU LEANED AGAINST MY GUN OMG YOU-

Logan, smirking: -Which further proves that I'm neither boring nor unromantic.

[fawndrip]

"i hear wedding bells!" ~ shipper dialogue prompts 🍵

∘ “i’m emotionally attached to a relationship that doesn’t exist. do you know how exhausting that is?”

∘ “can you two stand closer together? for science. and my sanity.”

∘ “i saw you brush shoulders. that’s legally binding where i’m from.”

∘ “just kiss already, i’m aging over here.”

∘ “every time you flirt and then say you’re ‘just friends,’ i lose a brain cell. i don’t have many left.”

∘ “i am not saying i ship you but i’ve already made a wedding playlist and picked out your first dance song.”

∘ “i’ve shipped fictional people with less chemistry than you two and they still kissed.”

∘ “i blinked and missed the moment you fell in love. can you reenact it?”

∘ “are you flirting or do you always make heart eyes while handing someone a pen?”

∘ “you make me believe in love. which is rude. and confusing.”

∘ “i am this close to handcuffing you together. don’t test me.”

∘ “they smiled at your joke. i’ve never smiled at your jokes. that’s love.”

∘ “stop acting like you’re not in love. it’s embarrassing for me.”

∘ “you’re basically dating. just without the benefits. or the kissing. or the honesty.”

∘ “have you considered: me, being right, about you two, being in love.”

∘ “i saw the hand graze. i saw it. don’t gaslight me.”

∘ “every time you deny your feelings, a fairy dies. think about that.”

∘ “you literally said, ‘i care about you more than anything.’ friends don’t say that! i say that to cake! but because i love it! ”

∘ “you’re blushing. they’re blushing. i’m blushing. just kiss, you cowards.”

∘ “friends don’t look at each other like that. enemies don’t look at each other like that. only soulmates do.”

∘ “when you finally get together i’m going to sob. and then say ‘i told you so.’”

∘ “i love love. specifically your love. now get it together and be the main characters you were meant to be.”

PROMPTS BY @iamgonnagetyouback / @fawndrip

[inkskinned]

i'm still trying to piece together the truth of it. when you left, you said: feel free to spin this narrative however you want. i have no idea if you were being cruel or if you just genuinely don't remember what you've done to me.

it's hard because i'd done so much of the work for you. i had seen the parts that flaked off, the rust underneath. i started separating you into two people - the one i loved, and the one who hurt me. i had this fantasy version of you - my partner - and then i had this stranger, a third person who would show up randomly to shatter me. i am deliriously glad i'm no longer with "the stranger". i miss the gentle (unreal?) "other" you terribly.

at first, i was so strict about my boundaries. i remember telling you to get the fuck out of my house if you were going to talk to me like that. by the end: i would justify your behavior for you, accepting even your mistreatment as "my fault" in the grand scheme. i look back on the person i was before you - smart, independent, confident - and i feel a strange sense of detachment. i don't even recognize me.

even in one of our last conversations, you said: if you want a partner that always talks warmly to you, find someone else. there was a time that a comment like that would have made me leave. and instead, somehow, i just placidly accepted that kind of thing. you were literally telling me that i wasn't allowed to have a reaction to your cruelty - and i just took it, because you'd so fully turned things around on me.

when people are faced with irrationality, a rational brain tries to make sense of it. this is the trap. they're lovely in the morning, gentle and blue-eyed and sweet. like nothing even happened, they breeze around the house and kiss you on the mouth. but at night; who is that? they snap almost randomly; flying into an impotent rage about just-about-anything. it just doesn't make sense. so the problem must be me, and my brain, and how i think.

the traumatized brain just wants peace. so maybe i'm misremembering. maybe you were just having a bad day. maybe it's actually me.

you eventually would fully turn on me and start implying that i am the bad actor in our relationship. that's what happens, right? that's literally in the playbook. you went to therapy for all of a month, told her a half-truth, co-opted therapyspeak. you figured out how to reframe your actions as "seeking peace." any time i stood my ground, i was "gaslighting." when i asked you to be more gentle, you said i was "tone policing." you said, randomly, i had emotionally manipulated you - i still have no idea what that's even specifically referring to. maybe my consistent requests for calmness and empathy?

and while i literally know better, and i'm sitting here, trained by you, thinking: wait, fuck. was i actually the person you made me out to be?

and the thing that scares me is that i literally do not know if you ever actually saw what you were doing to me. when you'd tell me how you remember arguments, you'd always summarize them in a way where you come off as gentle and easy: "i was trying to set an important boundary." what had actually happened was 15 minutes of you shouting at me i know you did something shady, just admit it already. eventually you'd say my reaction to your shouting (when i finally reacted, which usually happened around hour three) was inevitably "disappointing" and "another way i'm silencing your feelings."

how many times did i ask you - beg you - to just take accountability? looking back, i don't think i ever heard you say: you're right. the way i talked to you was wrong of me.

i am trying to tie together the two people into a full version of you in my head. yes, you made my coffee and made me laugh and spent hours on the phone with me. and yes - you would scream at me until i had to run away and hide behind something.

i wish i did have a narrative i could pull out and shape to my whim. i wish i did have some semblance of reality. instead i just stand here, strange and vibrating, wondering: what the fuck just happened?

[lazylittledragon]

ok someone please correct me if i'm wrong but am i weird for thinking those 'audiobooks don't count as reading' posts are ableist as fuck????

[chrrywvea]

logan purrs when he's asleep. he purrs like a content little cat when he's smushed into wade's side, his whole adamantium weight pressing into wade who doesn't really mind because ✨️who in their right mind says no to wolvie cuddles✨️ (wade uses him as a weighted blanket anyway, who needs air pffffft he doesn't)

but HOLY MARVEL JESUS he has a silent freak out the first time he discovers logan purring in his sleep during one of their movie binges. (they have weekly movie nights fight me)

a healthy (not) bout of cuteness aggression happens that night and even though wade is a little confused both by the fact that logan actually fell asleep on him and that HE IS PURRING OH MY GOD- he doesn't fight it and even naps with him (the best sleep both of them have ever had considering lots of nights are full with nightmares and insomnia)

and the thing is- wade very carefully talks to some of the surviving xmen in their universe about it and they just go 🤔🤨❓️ because not one of them has ever seen or heard logan do this (i'd imagine maybe kayla or mariko, scott even - logan told him about them, but hey wade can't really ask them can he) and then wade REALIZES and it hits him SO hard. logan is comfortable with him. he's at ease and relaxed enough in his presence to allow himself to slip into his slightly more animalistic traits without having to fear any judgement or rejection. he. is. comfortable. and wade maybe cries a little (a lot) at that realisation, holding logan even tighter when it happens again - the older man slumped against him during one of their movie nights, sleeping tight and soft purrs vibrating deep from his chest